Doughboys - ESPN Zone with Neil Campbell

Episode Date: October 12, 2017

Comedian and writer Neil Campbell (Comedy Bang! Bang!, Brooklyn 99) joins the 'boys as Jockdoughberfest 2017 continues with a trip to ESPN Zone. Thoughts on the network itself and antics during live games are discussed before revealing the final verdict. Then, a timely mid-autumn segment of International House of Hot Takes.Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a manufacturing town, and the inhabitants are distinguished by their enterprise and industry. So wrote John Warner Barber, an American engraver who spent his life penning numerous local histories about the town of Bristol, Connecticut. First founded in the colonial days as an agricultural village called New Cambridge, Bristol was incorporated under its current name back in 1785, and for nearly two centuries it was best known as Bell City and Mum City because of its chief industries, designing doorbells, and growing chrysanthemums.

Then on September 7, 1979, a new cable channel launched that was headquartered in Bristol, the entertainment and sports programming network, better known by its four-letter acronym. The channel, created by TV sports veteran Bill Rasmussen, would transform not just the sleepy hamlet into a media epicenter, but transform sports into an unrelenting 24-7 American obsession. Rasmussen's brainchild had early success by acquiring the television rights to previously low-profile events, the NCAA basketball tournament, now known as March Madness, and the NFL Draft. In 1984, the channel was purchased by Broadcast Network ABC, which raised its profile and access to content, and by the 90s it was practically a lifestyle brand for its overwhelmingly

male audience, the anchors of its hit recap show SportsCenter becoming minor celebrities with their own signature catchphrases. In 1996, the big-fish ABC was swallowed by an even bigger fish, Disney, who acquired the sports channel in the process. Disney CEO Michael Eisner, a Craven opportunist who greenlit countless extracurable direct-to-video sequels to animated classics as cheap cash-ins, saw the brand as a natural fit for its own bar and grill. At the end of 1998, the sports network's first sports bar opened in Baltimore, and

by the mid-2000s, locations would dot major cities across the US. But the end of the out-sauce sports viewership became increasingly fragmented, cable channel subscriptions declined amidst the availability of internet video, as well as social medias up to the second reporting of breaking news and highlights. And as the network's ratings have flagged in recent years, including its once-unsinkable flagship SportsCenter, so too did the fate of its restaurant chain, as dining rooms began closing one by one. By 2013, only a single location near Disneyland remained, making this a chain in our only

our memories. So does this athletic-themed eatery deserve its fate, slowly fading into irrelevance like its parent company? Or is it prime for that classic sports trope, the underdog making a comeback? This week on Doughboys, we continue Jock Doberfest 2017, a month of sports-themed restaurants with our second draft pick, ESPN Zone. Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants, we're at productionofferralaudio.com. I'm Nick Weiger, alongside my co-host, Tom Weitey, the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell.

Tom Weitey. Yeah, another take. Last week, we had a Tom Brady slam. This is another take on a Tom Brady slam, courtesy of Craig, at Sabo Metrics. I thought it was like a Tom Weitey thing. It says something like Tom... Here's the thing. We had Tom Gravy, and I was like, that doesn't really work, but I'll use it because it's

Tom Brady. Then we had Tom Weitey, which is also kind of a Tom Brady thing, also doesn't really work. I fully think that's... Oh, I shouldn't talk yet. Sorry. No, you can talk. No, no, no.

Cut this out of the other side. I don't... No, we'll include it. We were going to keep this in. No, what did you think? Tom Weitey's thing? No, he must wait. I think this is why I like this.

No, I feel like Tom Weitey's... I want to know, too. Should I get through my bullshit? Absolutely. You could just tell us, right? Yeah. What did you think? No, honestly, I felt...

They felt bad. I don't know what to put up before that. Howdy-how to Spoon Nation. Ooh, I almost lost my voice there. I got a drop, Nick. Does it seem like I'm... Like you forgot to get a drop and now you're searching for it frantically?

No, I had the drop as the issue and now I can't... Right. What's the shirt you're wearing? It says I'm kind of a big deal. Oh, it's like an Anchorman shirt? No, it's... Wait, is that an Anchorman joke?

Yeah, I'm kind of a big deal. That's an Anchorman quote. Yeah, it's from my mom. Wait, but who's on it? Is it just you? No, it's the Hulk. Oh, the Hulk's on it. You thought that was me?

I don't know. That was like a green U. No, it's not me. Okay, wait. I got... Wait, where the fuck did my drop? This is insane. What a mess.

Fuck you. It's not a mess. This is good radio. You think this is radio? Are you aware what format we work in? It says news that you got to play and now I can't find it. I truly can't find it anymore.

Oh, well, should I just not play a drop this time? This is going to be the first dropless episode. I think the fans are going to be crushed. Oh, fine. I'll just play this one. I don't know what it is. Okay. And here it is.

Great. Oh, God, is it going to be long? Well, just play a little bit of it. And if you want to cut it off, you can cut it off. Can we edit all of this out? This is the most... No, we're not going to edit this. It's a minute 37.

We'll just start playing and see what happens. We've spent a minute 37 with you trying to find the shorter drop. Please say what you're going to say. For God's sake, say what you're going to say. Neil's shaking his head. Oh, God, I can't find the... I can't find it. I can't find it anymore.

I'm going to give up. All right. You know, here, here. I'll add a little drop for you. Okay. It's Poochy from The Simpsons. Howdy ho, neighborino. Hi, Dr. Nick.

Well, things a little bigger down here in Texas. Burn it on it. Bad. Burn it on it. Bad to the spoon man. Burn it on it. Bad. Goodbye, everybody.

You know what? Yeah. I found it. Okay, great. Here we go. No. Fuck this. Play it.

They're all a minute long. These people don't listen to me. Just play it. I'm not... Oh, fine. I mean, this could be a weirdo for real. Probably. This is...

Is this the best of... Hell yeah. This worked out great for me. There's 40 more seconds. You think it's just the Seinfeld theme? I'll fast forward a little bit. Sounds like it just was. Just a very heavily distorted version of the Seinfeld theme?

You know what? I'm going to say that drop was worse than my fumbling, trying to find a drop. I think it was worth it. I'm happy. It was worth the wait. Oh, for sure. That was Michael.

Michael. Michael. Michael. That was worth the wait. That was Michael Carlson. This is very important. And please make sure you play the whole drop is played. Michael Carlson at down to clown.

Well, you didn't play the whole drop. I think you should... C-W-O. I think you should play the whole drop next episode. He looks like Doug Benson. Oh, no. He's in a picture with Doug Benson. Oh, boy.

Well, the podcast had to end at some point. Mitchell, let's introduce our guest. It's Shocktoberfest. We got a sports fan here. We got a great sports fan with us. A great guest in general. Returning to the podcast, the head writer for IFC's Comedy Bang Bang.

Currently writing for Brooklyn Nine-Nine. Our good friend, Neil Campbell. Neil, welcome back. Go team. Oh, man. Thanks for having me, guys. I'm always excited to be here for the second time. I'm excited.

You're a very controversial guest. Yeah. And you gave Pizza Hut a single fork. Yes. Yeah. I stand by that. Yeah. I mean, I've gotten harsher as this podcast has gone on.

I've given some one forkers out. But that was one where you really, I think, really shocked the world. Yeah. I stand by my logic for that, too. That I don't need to go back into. Right. But I think it makes sense.

But yeah, that was one... I don't ever read like recaps of things I worked on or message boards of things I worked on. But I do check Twitter. And there were definitely some people who were unhappy or thought I didn't get the show or something. Right. That seemed to be...

And maybe I don't. I was one of the people tweeting angrily. But people mentioned it to me also last year, like a year and a half ago, when I was on the Bang Bang live tour. Right. And we would do meet and greets after the show. And sometimes people would come up and be like,

one fork. So that was nice, actually. Wow. Oh, our fans. They're confrontational, apparently. Yeah. Take it easy. Our guests are entitled to their opinions.

You got a broodog, as you call them. Oh, I'm having a... I'm more recording late at night. Yeah. Real, real late. I'm having a little broodog. Which I think fits jock doberfest. Hell yeah.

Classic jock move. Yeah. I think that you offered Neil and I a broodog. And since you called it a broodog, we both declined. And the big... It's a big sports week. The MLB playoffs are happening. Right.

As of this recording. As of this recording. We have the NBA season about to begin. The NBA season. About to tip off. NHL's about to tip off as well. Oh, boy. Puck drop.

The puck is about to drop on a new NHL season. Right. NFL season and full swing. The ball is in the air, you could say. The football is flying through the air. It's flying through the air. It's a quarter of the way through the air. We're one quarter into the season.

We're at the 25-yard line. And that ball is going to keep sailing. There's four quarters too. Yeah. It's going to keep... It's a 25-yard line. It'll sail to the... It's the second quarter?

Yeah. It'll sail to the midpoint at the end of the second quarter. This is a ball that is thrown so long and so slow. Yes. The ball is in the air and then it traverses the 100-yard field. We got a Red Sox playoff game tomorrow. And we got a Patriots Thursday night game tomorrow. And Nick, it's my birthday and you're invited to come.

Yeah. Happy birthday, buddy. This will actually be... This will be one week after your birthday when this episode releases. Now, I have a question for you. Will you come? Will you come on your birthday? Yeah.

No. Hey, wait a minute. I came to a number of your previous birthdays. A number? Yeah, I have. That number might be two, but it is a number. I've come to your birthday gatherings. I've come in to hang out with everybody.

I've had a great time. Is that your hang for the year? Yeah. That's my one socially obligated hang. I'll check that box and then I'll be done with it. Nick, are you sick of Jock Doberfest? No, I'm having a ball. I mean, we've had technically we've done...

We've had three meals at this point, three Jock Doberfest meals. We've had three meals. We won't spoil the... Yeah, we won't spoil the next episode, but we had this... What we ate with Neil and what we had for the next episode on the same day. So, we're three in in terms of food consumption. I'm having the time of my life. I've hit the October...

It's too much at this point. We'll get into where we went today, but I think this was a big part of my problems. Do you think this particular chain? Yes. Jock Doberfest in general or this place we want to? I mean, the Jock Doberfest, I feel like, almost ended for me with this one.

Right, gotcha. Well, let's take a step back from the specific chain for one second. Okay. Neilertude, you're a big time sport, though. I feel like you are... In terms of... I knew you very, very early on at the Upright Citizens Brigade and I feel like there's a lot of sports averse people in the comedy community.

This is the thing we touched on last episode with Matt Besser. But you've always been someone who's been a die-hard, dedicated sports fan and I know you're from Fairfax, Virginia. Your army, Brad, you kind of were all over, but you're someone who follows the Washington, D.C. area sports franchises. Mostly, yeah. I guess the team of which I am the biggest fan would be the Washington Capitals.

Right, that's my team I like the most. They're a very frustrating team for which to root. So I think what I've become good at as a sports fan is... I am, like I do enjoy sports a great deal. I don't get too worked up over winning and losing because I've known only losing. So every year when a Trevor team I'm rooting for eventually crap out, I got like, ah, man, again.

And then the next morning I wake up and I'm like, oh well, I prefer the arts anyway. But yeah, Capitals I love. I go try to see them every time they're playing the Ducks and the Kings here in SoCal. I just want them to win one Stanley Cup in my lifetime. I don't need a dynasty. But I probably won't get that.

The Nationals weren't there when I was growing up and the Washington football team, I have a lot of problems with. So since moving to LA, I really got into the Dodgers. I mean, Mitch is really mad that they're thinking about changing their name. No, that's what he always is saying. So I've recently started to, I guess, well, okay, I'll say this.

I'm not a massive NFL fan as it is. But I started doing a fantasy league at work, which I hadn't done for literally 10 years. So I've started to pay a little more attention right around the time everyone agrees it's good to start enjoying the NFL. Now's the time to become a new NFL fan. Yeah, exactly. At least never been stronger.

The game's never been safer. Yeah, it's healthy. So I don't know why this year, paying attention again somewhat, but I guess I'm sort of fond of the Rams, but Dodgers are my baseball team. I grew up also rooting for the Orioles, but you don't really need to worry about rooting.

The chances of them ever meeting in a World Series is slim. And that you were out of Washington by the time the Nationals were there. Yeah, I was gone from there before the Nationals were there. So I went to Iowa for college. And I lived in New York. And I remember in those cities being like, I should start rooting for a new baseball team.

And then I was in New York. I was like, I've hated the Yankees. Like the Jeffrey Mayer series was a real like dark point for me as a teenager Orioles Yankees playoff series. And so I still really am fond of the Orioles, but when I moved to LA, you know, 15 years ago or whatever, that's when I was like 14 years ago. Yeah, that I was like,

okay, I'm going to root for the Dodgers. And right. And I had gone to a Dodgers game as a kid. It's my uncle lived out here. And I had had a good time at that. And then I started going to games and I actually became a fan. I got to say the this is and this is a slight tangent from what you're saying.

But people like pile on LA sometimes for not having great fans. Dodgers fans are great. Dodgers fans are like super passionate and they're like super into that team. Pretty easy to get tickets though. Hey, you know what? I will say that though that yeah,

these are tickets to any fucking baseball game baseball stadium sell out your round. Yeah. I don't know. I'll bet Dodger Stadium. You're trying to compare it to Fenway. I'll bet Dodger Stadium has 25,000 more seats than Fenway. Hmm.

I just trying to say that. I don't know. I could probably go to a Lakers game anytime I wanted to. I mean, you pay a lot of money. It's pretty easy to just walk. Yeah, exactly. No, the Lakers fans are are insanely like, you know, passionate and I really follow that team through.

I honestly through thick and thin that that team, even when that team was doing shitty, the tickets never really got cheap. I mean, it's always been like a like a and this I was on the season ticket waiting list for years and years. I mean, it's just it's like it's like a super. It takes a very long time for for anyone to like get in there because they're just like so many people who have been

following that team forever. Yeah. Like I think it's still pretty easy. Like there's a lot of empty seats. No, there aren't a lot of empty. You go. You can probably sit right next to Jack Eccleston. There's so many seats.

No way, buddy. Yeah, I think that the I've always. Yeah. I mean, I know like Dodgers, you know, fans beat a man into a coma 10 years ago or so. It's they don't have a great reputation, but I've always had a good time. Obviously when Dodgers games and enjoyed the other fans like,

you know, baseball games can definitely have. They have very annoying, very drunk people. Yes. Sometimes you still see those, but right to Dodgers fans threatened to beat me up at my first Dodgers game ever. Really? I was around a Red Sox hat and there. I mean, it was very.

They were very casual. Yeah. Jokey about it. But I mean, yeah, I'll be honest. How often does that happen to you just in your day to day life? I was on a Red Sox hat and they were like, I was they were talking to me a little bit and then lining and they're like, hey, you were in a Red Sox hat and like,

we should beat the fucking shit out of you. And I was like, we're we're the American League. Who cares? Yeah. Yeah. That sounds like good natured, right? Yeah, it was good. But they did say we should beat the fucking shit out of this guy.

Right. That was and was that before after that horrific incident with the Giants fan? It was probably before. Okay. And there was also after I had stolen their hot dogs. Okay. Well, that was the issue.

You slimered these guys. Slime the talk. I've gone to hockey games as rooting for the opposing team. I've never really had an issue at Dux or Kings games with anyone being would you know, like aggressive or weird? Yeah, I think it depends on the fan base. I also do think like, I think the, I don't know if the Kings or Dux fans out here are necessarily

would be people who'd be particularly aggressive or convertible, but then again, I don't follow NHL at all. Yeah. Kings fans get pretty worked up at the games, I'd say a little more so. Okay. My observation that Dux fans, but it's never been directed toward me.

Hockey has the biggest bunch of bullies Brian Whitney. Oh, right. You had a, you had a bully who went to, you went to school with who was having an NHL career. That's right. And now I believe has a podcast. He does.

Really? I think that we should have him on here. We should. Yeah. Hash it out. Hash things up. Didn't his Wikipedia page mention that he beat you up at one point? I think it also said that like he wedged me and I like pissed my,

it says something very funny. I don't know. I feel like the editor was a certain Neeler dude. I edited that. I think I was present for it being edited. Was it me? Someone did it. I think maybe it's still in the history.

Someone. So someone changed that or someone. Yeah. I think so. Right. I mean, obviously maybe Whitney took it out and maybe he feels bad about it. You think he personally edited his Wikipedia page?

Probably that loser. He's the one who turned out to be a loser. Neil. So you wait. I was going to ask. Yes. Go for it. Nice.

Jason the from Friday the 13th series. Yeah. He's been wearing a hockey mask. He's been wearing a hockey mask for so long. They've changed what a hockey mask looks like. Yeah. What they look like. Yeah.

I think he should also upgrade to a newer hockey mask. Yeah. I think so too. So you just see like his deformed face. Yeah. You have like some stupid design airbrushed on the side. He could be a pretty good enforcer. Jason.

Sure. Yeah. But he'd probably get a gay misconduct. Burner. Which would be a good tagline. Do you guys remember Mutant League hockey for the Genesis? No. That was a that was a big there were a couple of there's Mutant League hockey and Mutant

League football. Yeah. That sounds like. I don't know. But I mean that was that was I think the closest we've come to Jason being on the ice. True. We can all agree that that's the closest we've come. Yeah.

That is the closest in history we've come. Wait. How is Jason not like in Jason takes me ahead and how is he not like stumbled onto like a hockey rink or something? Yeah. That's funny. Yeah. It was almost certainly shot in Toronto.

Has that not happened in any of the Jason movies? He's never been around hockey or hockey equipment. I mean, he this is a question for Paul Rust. I think I think he's maybe been around. Yeah. Paul loves Friday the 13th. Yeah. But has he I mean that might be worries.

He might be he might have been around equipment because I think that's maybe where he grabbed the mask. Okay. Was like in the maybe the remake to there's like a scene where like where they like reference the hockey thing more. I don't know. You know what they should put in like the Jason remake because this is the kind of scene they have in movies now.

They should. So Jason is like a little boy being made fun of and he's trying to play hockey and like a kid like someone else like breaks his racket or a racket. Whatever. I don't fall hockey. It breaks. It breaks his shit. Racket was the thing that you went with.

Look, I would say I said the wrong term. Cool. Yeah. They'd break his stick and they'd be like they'd be like a stick to baseball kid. Yeah. Something like that. And then later on he'd have the hockey mask and he get revenge on that guy. Maybe by killing him with a baseball bat.

Yeah. He also dropped like he goes into the lake and drowns and then grows is a weird story with him with how he how did he get big. We missed Jason's like puberty the teen years of Jason. Well, yeah, he grew up in hell. I think. Oh, that's right. Okay.

Why did he go to hell? He was just a why he just couldn't swim. But he was deformed. Yeah. I fell bad the second I said it. Am I going to go to hell? Yeah. We all are now.

I think the I mean I do think it's kind of crazy that that all like because I want you watch the first Jason movie the first Friday the 13th. And it's like it's very dated. But it's just like Jason isn't even really in it. No. And the mom is in it. Spoiler alert. But the way them and the mom is the bad guy.

But the way the mom is presented, it's like she kind of comes out of nowhere. It's like they don't like set her up in the first act at all. She just kind of appears in the third act and just gives her entire back story. There explains that she's been the killer. It's just like a very weird way. But you get the little tag at the end where you're like, Oh, Jason. Yeah. May come back from hell.

Right. And he did. Possibly after getting a big wish from a hell genie. Maybe that's what that's what filled in those gaps. Neil. So I had a question for you that sports related and related to your upbringing. Sure. You are, you spent some time in Japan as a youth.

Yes. Did you ever take in any Japanese baseball? I did. Yeah. What did you see and what was it like? I would go to the, I think it was called the Tokyo dome and maybe it had a nickname as that was like the big egg or the egg dome. Right.

And there was that. Those are also Mitch's nicknames. What the hell? Coming at me today. The team was the giants. I feel like they were, I forget if they're just called the Tokyo giants or maybe like the Yoshimura giants or something like that. Oh yeah.

But I would go see games there. And the thing I remember is that they would have a lot of. Yomiuri giants. Yomiuri. Yeah. Oh God. Why didn't I? Why did I guess that?

How many setting there? And like they would do like claps or be like, wait, no, that's the. Let's go. Let's go. It was a different one. I won't remember now. Now that now I have that in my head, but there would be like, not like the whole crowd would like do the same chant at the same time.

Yes. And that was cool. Not being prompted by the Jumbotron or anything or like the stadium. I don't think so. But but like definitely was like, oh, I'm being quiet or I'm doing that. It wasn't like, I mean, that was not throughout the entire game start to stop. But it was, it was a lot more. Yeah.

Like a lot more stuff in unison and a lot more kind of right audience participation in a way in terms of how rooting, but that was great. We go to those and played little league there and every year I was on an army base and so we would just play the other military bases. We'd play, you know, the naval base or the other army bases and stuff like that. I was on Kepzama if anyone was stationed there. Probably Atsugi in Yokohama and Yokozuka and stuff. And but every year before the season began, we would play one of the local Japanese teams

and they would cream us. Wow. Every year. Really fun. And we'd play. Yeah. It would be our, you know, Kepzama team against like a local Japanese baseball team and they would just fucking destroy us.

Wow. That's crazy. That's awesome though. Yeah. It was great. Why are you rooting for Neil's team? No, I think in the past. I think it's awesome that he had that experience.

Oh yeah. No, that's cool. No, I wasn't. It's not awesome that his team got creamed. I'm trying to find, I'm trying to find players of note for the Giants. I know that there are a few. Oh, Gabe Kapler was there at one point. That's, I mean, I feel like a ton of people from Welcome Back Cotter.

Oh, I knew. I knew it was. Who was there? And like Atsui was a giant. Who was there in like 88, 89? 88 and 89. I feel like they had a couple Americans and that would be kind of fun to. Yeah.

Oh, there's, there's, no, there's a bunch of Americans that I wonder what team Kevin Malar was about to go to. I wonder if it was the Giants or not. But he was about to go to a Japanese team before the Red Sox picked him up and then they, they eventually won the world. Nepon Ham fighters? Is that, that's one of the teams I think? Oh yeah.

Yeah. I think it might have been the Giants or the Dragons or something. I love Japanese baseball. Yeah, it seems really cool. I also, I really like like their, the, like the logos and everything. Yeah. And those are like, oh man, I'd love to have a hat of this, but then it's just like not an easy thing to, to come across.

Yeah. Japanese people are way more into the games. I mean, like every pitch is, they're excited and it's, it is cool to, to do. Yeah. We had a, oh God, I'll try to do this as quickly as possible. So when we were in Japan, there was like this rumor that if you went to Hong Kong, you could get this thing called an adapter that you could plug into the Famicom games.

Right. And it was sort of the same shape cartridge as a Super Nintendo cartridge. Yeah. But this was pre-Super Nintendo. Yeah. So this was just NES. The Famicom was the NES. And the Famicom was the, the, the, the family computer.

And so there was this thing, this, this legendary thing called the adapter. You could get that in Hong Kong and then plug it into the bottom of a Famicom game and then it would play in an NES. And my parents went on a vacation without my brother and I to Hong Kong. And we were like, if you find the adapter, get it. And I, even as a kid, I was like, it's probably a legend. Right. And they came back and we were like, did you get it?

Like, we got it. And they had. Wow. They've got these adapters. So then my brother and I started buying Japanese video games or getting them as gifts. Yeah. You know, more often.

And we had a couple of baseball ones that we liked to play. And it taught us how to tell what the different like symbols were. Right. For the positions. Cause we would always swap out who's playing, you know, center field or left field or first or whatever. And so we learned what the different like, is it kanji? Is that what it's called?

The symbols are. Yeah. There's kanji and katakana. Yeah. I think are the three different. So we'd learned the symbols for the baseball positions. That was fun. But the greatest game we ever played, they made an American version.

I think called like dusty diamonds, all star softball, but the American version was only human players. Okay. So we had one in Japan. I have no idea what it was actually called in Japan that had like mummies and and. Whoa. Coons and stuff.

And everyone had different abilities. Like the eagle could fly. So you could put him in the outfield and stuff. Oh man. Fly and you pick your lineup and you play against each other. My brother and I like still to this day. I mean, we haven't. I guess probably used our India.

Like as long as we could get the NES to work like into our 20s. Right. We were using it to like still play that game. It was so fun. Oh man. Other Japanese baseball game. We had had a weird thing that would happen sometimes as just part of it. Like a random thing where a drunk guy would wander on to the field.

So the game would stop. Oh man. That's great. Yeah. And it was like a guy to look like one of the guys are probably like the drums that are sort of wearing like a, a sumo outfit kind of a thing and like a headband and like he wanders onto the field. Yeah.

It was great. That's so cool. Like the, the, how many times like are those things just legends of like the right? Oh yeah. The fact that it's real. Yeah. Maybe it was called a converter.

I think who cares? But I mean, whatever it was called what we called it in our school. I think we got it. It was just said like Honeywell or Honeybee on it or something. Yeah. I've had that your parents even like, cause I'd be like, get me the converter. My mom would have no idea what to get. Yeah.

I was like eight and didn't really think it was going to happen. I was already skeptical. And I was like, yeah, well, might as well ask. That's unreal. That's like the super Nintendo, well, cause super Nintendo, the next thing it was supposed to be after super Nintendo was, it was supposed to be the PlayStation basically. Yeah.

That was a collab originally with Sony and Nintendo and the Nintendo went, they went in a different direction. And so the Sony PlayStation. And that was legendary up until recently. I think someone like found some like working like a development kid. Oh, interesting. Wow. I actually, my love for video games began with the Famicom because my brother's best

friend at elementary school, Casey Nagasaki, his parents were from Japan. And so they had brought a Famicom. They had got it and hit their son of Famicom and we would go over to Casey's house and play it. This was before the NES was out state side because it was like back then it was like a year and a half before anything made its way over. Yeah. And they spent a lot of time preparing, Nintendo spent a lot of time preparing for that launch

to make sure it would work in the US. And I just remember playing Super Mario Brothers, Super Mario Brothers 2, which was not the Super Mario Brothers 2 we got out here. It was the, the Lost Levels version, which, and it was super hard. And then 3D World Runner, he had those three games. I think the Famicom that he had, maybe it was like a power like adapter converter thing, but it ran actually on D batteries because I remember like run out of charges, need to have to get new batteries for it.

And, but it was like, like, I just remember being so amazed and captivated. Like we would go over to his house and we would just like sit there and like, I would, like we would play or I would just like watch them play just for like hours. And just like, I just could not stop thinking about it. We finally got one when we finally got our own NES when it came out in the US, which was like after it had launched. It was like, like, you know, a long time after that had even come out here. How long did it launch?

You were like, like 25, 26. Come on, come on now. I was, I think it was six years old, five years old, baby. I was a young boy. But it's like that it is crazy that that was like a thing back then where it was like, you wouldn't just have access to the idea of, oh, I know what it because of pre Internet and that's that's a tried observation. But like, you wouldn't know that like, oh, there's a Japanese version of this that looks

different and takes differently shaped games. It has they alter the content when they bring it to the US to make it safer or more sanitized. It's just it's just like a totally crazy different era. So in a couple of days, like people will look and they'll see like, hey, they extended the the extended this character skirt like a few pixels to make it to satisfy the ESRB when they released it in the US and I'm outraged over that censorship. It's bullshit. Yeah, but you're pissed off about that, right?

It's bullshit. There were a lot of there were a lot of video game girls I had crushes on. Oh, all right. Moving on. This is this is in video game chat. It's it's junk. Don't you want this video game shit on this gas? I thought when Grundy transformed in Banjo-Kazooie into the hot Grundy.

I thought she was attractive. All right. So that here's the thing. I know that you're younger than me, but you were in your mid to late teens. Banjo-Kazooie was out and that was a very crude 3D character. That was like less like fewer polygons than Tomb Raider. Easier than buying a mag, dude. I think honestly, my first my first video game crush might have been

the White Mage and the original Final Fantasy. Just because it was like I was just like, oh, it's like a girl in a video game that I can control because like that was like a novel thing in of itself. How many of your controllers stopped working because they were too sticky? You think I was producing semen as a prepubescent boy? I think it's possible. Amen. I mean, that's that's that's not an insult.

I guess. All right. Yeah, let's get back to sports. Well, maybe maybe we should get maybe we should talk food a little bit. So it's been a while since we've it's been a while since we've had you on the podcast, dealer dude. Anything has anything happened with you? Have you tried a new food? No.

I had already tried them all those. Okay. Keep going. No, I was going to I was actually going to ask if like, have you have you made any alterations to your because I know you're you've got a new job? Things have changed a little bit for for you. Have you made any alterations to your diet? Have you found your have you found like with like the hours of your current employment have affected what you eat at all? Um, you know, I wish I could say something interesting, but not really.

I mean, I still I think I literally said this last time I was on this. I have oatmeal almost every morning. Right. I order a salad for lunch, unless we're going to a place where it's like the ramen place or something. You know, I'll if it's like a place that pretty much doesn't have a salad. I'll I'll I'll get I might partake in like ramen or something. But I'm similar to that. But like, if it's something that's fun enough, like if it's wings, I'll be like, yeah.

Well, okay. And then I wonder if I should give away this big secret behind the scenes of Brooklyn. I know we do family style Friday every Friday where we are just big platters and we all, you know, share. So we'll get like, you know, dim sum or yeah, like there's like Korean hot wings or barbecue or something sometimes. So on those days, I mean, I just try to eat in moderation. Right. But which I'm semi successful at doing. But yeah, then dinner is always if we're staying late, I'll try to order.

I'll try to get something. That's not like gross. And I'll then be sitting there late working with it inside me. But if I go home and, you know, I'm never like, I'm never like, not going to go out and get a meal with a friend or someone. Do you postmates sometimes or? I've never used postmates, but I have used Yelp each 24. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

I've used that one. But there was a Thai place I liked that I would go pick up food from called Red Corner and it closed down. Oh, yeah. I saw that. I didn't really have a second favorite. So yeah, so so I dinner is a little bit more all over the place. But I would say, yeah, I've never really like a no fun guy. Right.

If it's like, like being up with a friend or whatever, I'm not like, well, I'm on on a diet. I try to like generally eat healthy so that when those types of things come up. I don't feel like I can't go eat with a friend or go out to a meal with someone because I'm trying to be on a diet this week only. Yeah. You've always struck me as like a like a very lean guy and I imagine some of that comes from your self control and I assume you exercise. I don't know what your fitness regimen is at all. Yeah, it's it's pretty much the same thing of like, I'll go to the gym, but then sometimes I won't. Right.

Some weeks of like, yeah, I'm getting up early every, you know, three or four days of the week. And then other weeks, I'm like, we stayed late last night. I'm not doing that. And right, you know, but it's someone who seems like kind of and and I don't mean to infer this if it is in the case. But it's someone who seems naturally thin. Like, do you notice that what you eat will ever like, if you go off the rails a little bit, will it affect your? Yeah, I mean, I'll weigh myself. Okay.

And definitely I'll be like, oh man, I went maybe for too long. Just like I'm living it up or or just say it's I'm always kind of aware, I guess, when it's like, oh man, these last two weeks for whatever reason have had however many like parties or events or barbecues or something. And just and like, or meeting a friend for a drink or something like that. And that's when I'll be like, this isn't going to be good. But I step on scale. But I feel like I don't ever then try to like swing back the other way and like, you know, eat three almonds and nothing else or whatever. I try to just go like, okay, let me go back to right being conscious of health. I'm kind of in a phase right now because I had like a three week run where I was.

Yeah, I was not working for a while and I had like a three week run where I booked a job, a short term job. And I was working not crazy hours, but you know, like regular hours, but had a very lengthy commute. And I kind of got taken out of the the exercise regimen that I'd kind of gotten on through this old job that I had and through certainly like was exercising more when I had some time when I was unemployed. And I just feel like I like after that, like it's just like that short span where it wasn't really I was really only exercising the weekends. And then my diet kind of went to shit because I was just sort of like eating whatever was around and was snacking a little bit more than I would normally do because of just some idleness and a lot of computer time. I right now feel fat as shit. And I know that like I just I feel like a fucking hog. Jesus, shut the fuck up.

No, I really I feel like I've gained like I feel like I've gained five to 10 pounds like in that span. And I just feel like I'm wearing the shirt I really like, but I can feel like my belly like you're like pushing. Yeah, I hate when I have that. Dude, I hope it's per soap. I hope it doesn't. Me too. But no, I mean, like I like I feel like for me and this might be partly because I'm getting older as as Mitch noted earlier, I'm old as dirt. And I feel like I'm as I'm getting even older.

I feel like my body will just immediately respond to anything if I if I if I don't stick really hardcore to what I'm eating when it's supposed to eat. Yeah. Well, I went to like Italy for a week earlier this year. And that was just a thing of I was like, what am I going to do? Not eat every fucking thing. Like I just like nonstop day every day was just, you know, master and nunning it. It was, you know, that was definitely I was got back to right state side. It was like, I should probably chill it cool it for a bit.

Was your was your vacation in black and white? The first half hour. Okay. Just the first half hour. Wow. I mean, that's not very long. You kind of stepped off the plane. Yeah.

It was really, yeah, I just did. I looked out the window of the plane. I was like, black sky, white stars. I guess I must be in Italy. You don't have to go over there for that. You're in the city of stars. Good point. You never go back over to Italy.

I'm going to go on a trip wager, but I can't because we have to record these podcasts. Well, you're not you're not chained to your table. Here's what we could. We could do this. October always sucks because we do this thing. Uh-huh. I feel like I've done nothing but this podcast for like three weeks. Yeah.

We've been recording a lot. I mean, I would just, here's what I would say. What we could get ahead enough where you would have the leeway to go out of town. You want to record 52. I'm not saying we need to court an entire year's worth of podcasts. It would only be 52 hours though. If we just did a marathon where we, how long do you think our episodes are? All right.

It would be a hundred hours. Yeah. So if we do that, so what? Four days in a row? Non-stop? You just want to binge through this. Like you're trying to like finish a JRPG. You're like, you're trying to do a like a speed run through one.

Like that. That's crazy. It's content. I mean, we could do it. I feel like people would, I think it would get really bad, really fast. What news is going to happen in the next year? Um, no, but I think we could like just, we could bank enough. I mean, easily we're already a head where if you went out of town for a week is not that

big of a deal. Can we record the finale of the show? Like do it early? Yeah. I'm saying, can we just record it now? Didn't they do, it wasn't that how I get, how I met your mother thing? Didn't they do like do the finale, the final like reaction to the voiceover very early on? Or they wrote it very early on?

Oh really? Something like that? Yeah. I don't know. Who was, who, who, who, who was the mother at the end of the show? Do you remember? It was, it was my mom. This is Wiker.

Yeah. It's the story of, of me. I was one of those kids. It was, what's her name? The actress. I don't know if she was on Fargo season two. I saw her in a play in New York, the David Bowie musical and I just am blanking on her name.

But, but then the whole thing was the story or Jake's mom on Brooklyn Nine-Nine. Right. Right. The whole story was that he was telling his kids the story of how he met their mom who has since died. Right. In order to like say, do you think it's okay if I go after the woman who was like them, the female, the, the Kobe Smulders?

Oh, okay. Oh, wow. It was like, okay, so you know all the, all the backstory of where it seemed like maybe I was going to be with her, but then I actually went up with your mom, but now your mom's dead. Is it okay if I go be with her? And then follow your heart. Aren't they also on the grave and they're, she's going to show the kids, the mom for

the first time. He's going to, oh my God. He's got like a crowbar crowbar over the coffin. You two just looked at me like that's something wrong. Yeah. It's funny. You can't return to reality. It was the crypt keeper the whole time.

I was telling the story. He makes a pun. Hey, it is crypt. It's crypt keeper season. That's true. That's how I met your smother. I missed that guy. He was a lot of fun.

They tried to bring him back. M Knight tried to bring him back. Is that dead? Are they not doing that? I don't think it's happening anymore. Classic M Knight twist. It's going to bring something back and then it didn't work out. When are you guys going to Seattle?

We're actually, as of this episode, we'll be releasing the day we are in Portland. We'll be in Seattle tomorrow. Okay. Well, speaking of video games. Yeah. My brother is coming to your show. Whoa. And he works in Campbell and he works at a video game company.

Oh, very cool. Maybe he can give you the inside scoop on the gaming. Can he turn me into a video game character? I mean, not literally, but. Well, then yeah, he can do it literally, but he can't otherwise do it. They have a machine. I don't think they make a disc that has enough memory to store your character model. It's too much data.

That doesn't actually mesmerize me. This is how grungy here I come. Don my wife as a kid in the original Legend of Zelda, you know, there's like the lost forest or whatever. They need to like walk through in a certain pattern. They have that. Hey, spoiler alert. They got a version of that in Breath of the Wild. Oh, that's right.

It's pretty tough. And guess what? Nick couldn't finish it. And I did because I'm smarter. What are you talking about? I finished the Lost Forest. No, but you didn't finish the other one, the Dark Swamp or whatever it is. Oh, that's fucking bullshit.

That's a side quest. Who cares about that? What? You didn't do it? That's one shrine. I went there and I could have figured out, but I just like, fuck this. I had moved on. Oh, cool.

And I don't even remember that game, how you learned the pattern. Yeah. But I just sort of assumed a video game like if you opened it up, the like circuit board or whatever was like the map and you were like a little electron moving across it. So one day, like my friend and I were like, how do you get through this forest? And we're like, let's just leave a brick on the controller and we'll just like go out and play. And eventually he's got to reach the other end of the forest.

Because we just thought like, if you just keep going, you reach the end of the cartridge. No idea. Yeah. What a dumb kid. I think you're very smart. I think the kid version was very smart. Yeah. That means you're dumb.

We'll take a break. We'll be back with more Doughboys. Welcome back to Doughboys. We're here with Neil Campbell. Mitch, over the break, you said you got some news. That's right. Is this breaking chews? It's breaking Jason news.

Whoa. And it's not that breaking, I guess. Okay. I asked Paul Rust. I texted him. I said, have any of the Friday the 13th movies had hockey stuff like jokes. And he said, in part eight, when Jason arrives in Manhattan, and I remember this now. He sees a billboard for a hockey team with a big goalie mask on it.

And he gives it a kind of a, what the look. Then Paul says, also in part seven, Wayne Gretzky makes a cameo. He sees Jason then turns to the camera and says, I like this guy's style. And then he said another thing. In part two, hold on, I gotta read. In part two, Jason bumps into Don Rickles in the forest. And Rickles looks at the hockey mask and goes, nah, too easy. Like a reference to him calling people a hockey puck.

Right. Paul's the expert. Very fascinating. Neil, so ESPN zone was this week's restaurant. I mean ESPN, I feel like is kind of a polarizing network. Yeah, they suck. Mitch has some frustrations with ESPN. I'm kind of neutral.

I feel like that. Can I just say this quickly? Oh, rest in peace to Tom Petty. Cause now this is, we're going to talk about this. My thing about Tom Petty was I was like, oh, it reminds me of my youth. It reminds me of music that I liked when I was younger. Great song, right? Tom Petty, great guy.

And so also with ESPN, it reminds me so much of my time at college. I would watch sports center all the time. Right. And I watched those dumb talking head shows. I would watch a lot. It was crazy because there wasn't like Twitter to like look for, you know, sports news or sports highlights. It was just like you had ESPN Sports Center.

And even like ESPN.com or something. Was it like, was no one had like such great video service that you could just be like, yeah, I can just look up any highlight from any game the way you can now. Yeah. And it's funny because ESPN. ESPN.com was like one of my big websites that I went to in college. It was like, but you're right. It wasn't like what it is now.

But there was like Bill. Bill Simmons had page two and stuff like that. But it was like tech stuff. It was like, that was like. It was just, it was basically articles. But it was probably, this is probably when ESPN was at its, around when it was at, when it was at its biggest. I speak of relevance, the ESPN, the magazine, the ESPs.

Yeah. I mean, like there was a point. I don't know if you guys remember this. We talked about this a little bit at the, at the restaurant, but ESPN had a phone at one point. Yeah. They had like their own branded phone. It was just like the weirdest thing.

Uh, you know, I do have you in fantasy football, it says when you're draft of the ESPN, it's like you were on the clock. You know that? Yeah. I always thought that would be good as a, like a, in a rap song as a little, as a sample. Well, you have so much influence on the world of hip-hop. I'm surprised that you haven't given that idea to someone yet.

If there are any rap, anyone who wraps out there, I think it would be good. Can we, I mean, can we try it out? I'll just, I'll just sort of throw down a little beat and then you can come like you could go. You were on the clock and it goes faster with each verse. Do you want me to wrap? No. It's saying throw down the sample.

We'll see if it works. Okay. You were on the clock. All right. Yeah. Yeah. That's sure. That's good, Mitch.

Faster and faster with each time and then Buster rhymes. Maybe it has the last verse. Yeah. Yeah. That would be really good. What have you gotten me to? I'll show you guys one. It's a big hit.

Anyways, I loved ESPN. I would watch it when I came home from class. I mean, this is the Red Sox won the World Series when I was in college, my senior year. The Celtics made some moves. And the Patriots were great. Celtics, they traded Antoine Walker, if you remember, which eventually led to what they became.

But I loved ESPN. They got worse and worse and like they just remind, like Broi in the way I don't like anymore. And like even when I'm like, even like Scott Van Pelt, who I like the most of any of the ESPN guys, even he's hard to watch for sometimes when I watch it now. Like he has like his friend on Sports Center.

And I'm like, this just sucks. It's like so much different than what it used to be. Like it just was to see the highlights. Yeah. Yeah. I was similarly, I feel like that way just with like sports analysis in general, like even when I go to game,

you know what? Honestly, for me, I like, what? Okay. Now I'm trying to say too much all at the same time. Like I used to listen to like sports talk radio too. Yeah, me too. When I drive around and stuff. And I remember I, like there were these DJs in LA.

When that, what's her name? Aaron, who's the sideline reporter? Oh yeah, Aaron Andrews. When the guy like caught peeping on her, filming her through her, the people in her hotel room. Yeah. And they were talking about it. These two like fucking idiots.

Yeah. And they said something like along the lines of like, but I mean the way, like essentially like the way she dresses, what does she expect? She has to be prepared for crazy people like that. Like though the way she presents her body or whatever. And I wanted, I shouldn't, I was going to say the name of the show.

I don't even know if it exists anymore, but I'm like, God, what if I am conflating two shows in my memory and I don't want to like say the wrong show. So long as you don't say dough boys. Yeah. It was dough boys. No, but I was just like, this fucking sucks.

And then just like, I was noticing things like, I stopped listening to that show permanently after that. And then I was just noticing stuff like that on other shows. I'm like, God, they're so like, literally I was listening to a game the other day. And then it turned off or the same station was on. And I got back in my car and there was like, whatever the sports talk host was was calling that guy who,

remember he like, there was that thing, Jonathan Martin and like Richie and Cognito. Oh yeah. And this is a hazing thing or something. Yeah. And the host was like, Jonathan Martin, that rat, that rat. Oh boy. And I was like, what the fuck?

Like it's just like, it's so disgusting to me. And honestly, when I go to, it's funny, we were talking about how I've never had like an experience of being hassled or anything personally. But when I go to sporting events there, I've just been a lot of times where if I've gone to a sports bar to watch a game with like fellow fans of the same team, just the like way to like fuck you at like this,

to like other players and stuff. I just am like, I don't like, why are things that I like enjoyed so much by like people I think are so gross and terrible? Yeah, by idiots. ESPN has guys, they're like too cool for school. And like they're like kind of like, I'm like the cool guy on the ESPN campus or whatever.

And then there's other guys who kind of feel like evangelical. Like, you know what I'm trying to say? Like they feel kind of like. It strikes me as a very conservative. Yeah, they feel, yeah, exactly. Yeah, I always, those things, those like sports, I don't know we're ever that bad on ESPN because I think they were a little bit like,

we're owned by Disney. We're not going to have a guy. Sure. Like someone's saying something like that is going to get, come up and sport. But yeah, I remember just what I would watch. I do some shitty shit too. Oh, for sure.

But, but it's a little different from like sports talk lunatics. I mean, like, you know, all the whole deflicate garbage. But the, the thing I just remember, I think ESPN would be like, that was so annoying is like, they would talk about, oh, should they have gone for two or should they have, or should they have gone for a fourth down

or should they have punted or whatever. And no one would ever talk about like, like, well, this percentage of the time, it's good to go for, you know, like it's actually the smart move when you look at numbers. It would just be like some dumb ass guy who used to be a like defensive player in NFL, who's just talking about like,

how he would think sitting on the bench. You gotta trust the defense or whatever. And it's, it was just, you gotta play to win the game. When you play not to lose, you lose the game. Yeah. Just people who just speak in like platitudes and cliches.

Their ego was on the line or something. If they, if he didn't like stick up for defender, it was just like, this isn't really breaking down if it was a smart choice or not. This was, this is just you being like, here's what I wish I like would have felt like, I don't know.

And anything I feel like, because if anything these days, it's almost like the pendulum is going a little bit too far to the point where analytics are used so much that I feel like kind of intangibles are discounted sometimes. So I feel like that, that can sometimes be a thing where it just, you're just thinking about a player's replacement value

and you're not actually evaluating like, Oh, there's actually things like, like chemistry within the team and that that can affect, you know, winning or losing just as much, but or can be a factor, even if it's not, if it's not an equivalent factor, but it is like there was an era

where everything was just about like gut and it was just about like, you know, like instinct and it was about like optics and what you think is the right move to make. And yeah, I mean, I don't know if I feel like that's, we've kind of gone past this, but just speaking out ESPN,

I mean, my memories of it is I did really like SportsCenter for a time. I was a big Stuart Scott fan, Rest in Peace. I liked Kenny Main back in the day. I don't know, Kenny Main's still at it because I don't want SportsCenter at all anymore.

But I mean, like, I like those are like, yeah, but I mean, there was a time, I mean, like vintage, like Dan Patrick, I like, you know, Overbin. Yeah. I mean, that was a lot of fun. I don't know if I like any of these guys. And honestly, like the,

the ads, the commercials were kind of ahead of their time. They had like these kind of self-aware ads where they, maybe they're just lame now. Maybe they just got lame with time. I think that might be the kind of thing. It just kind of gotten bigger. And then I feel like cable in general has gotten less relevant and feels more like old media.

Whereas there was a time where it felt like new media because it was breaking from networks. And now like the internet has kind of supplanted it. So, I just want to quickly say that ESPN did fuck the Patriots and I hate them and they have a bias against Boston sports teams. Anyways,

I won't get into it cause no one cares. Okay. Here's the only thing. And I look much smarter sports people than me can argue this. Yeah. It seems weird to say they have a buy, like, if you had a bias against a team, you wouldn't cover them. They give so many,

they give so much screen time to anything that any Boston team does in a way that like, I feel like teams, if a team is like surprisingly good, but not from like a market that has a big audience, they like will give them the minimal amount of attention. I think that's maybe why they late in the baseball season. It'll be like, wait, the Astros are really good. Like, I, you know, like I'll be like, I don't even pick up.

That's why they are bad. I mean, I don't want all the, I just want to see the highlights mostly. But anyways, I was just saying that to be an asshole. But when I was a senior in college, I was just on your point of people being asshole. Like, yeah, games. I, this guy, Evan Novick, who's my friend,

you promised me tickets to the ALCS. If they, if the games kept going, yeah, he had a ticket to game seven for the Red Sox first Yankees in their comeback when they won. But he also promised this guy Daniels, dank my friend and he said, and he was like, I promise both of you. So you get to play a high card and I pulled it to immediately

and he pulled whatever he beat me. But I was like, there was a sense, there was like kind of like a little bit of like a sigh of a relief because I was like, I don't want to go to like Yankee Stadium with a Red Sox hat on or have someone be like, you fat tub of shit. That is, that is terrifying. But on the other hand,

and this will bring us into where we went that you are good friends with and host podcast with say that. Actually, it's become every time we do the podcast, you do say something about me. I mean, that's probably more insulting and thought out and sometimes can cut even deeper. But so fuck you, I guess, but I like sports bars and in college,

I feel like a lot of people didn't like to go to sports. I kind of like to go to like fancier bars and and and I, there was this. There was this bench warmers. You song. It's gone. You song. What is cool? And I think to Cornell less smart school and

and there was a bar called bench warmers. There's bar called bench warmers. And it was like a sports bar and no one really like to go to. I've always liked sports bars because I feel like I like the atmosphere. I love a sports bar like hubs or whatever. I like Neil. I feel like you have opinion on an opinion on sports bars

that you said that you would maybe talk about on the podcast or am I making this up or no? The sports bar in general. Oh, you know, I just figured we would talk about sports bars in general. So I didn't want to like dig into the conversation there. I don't have some amazing point or anything. Are you are you like do you like like say there's one here

public house or something? Do you like sports bars in general or no? Yeah, I'm there like kind of like just like, you know what you're going to get. Right. I guess, you know, like, if I'm like actually want to go out for like meet friends for a cocktail or something, it can be a little like rowdy and gross and loud in the sports

bar or if nothing's going on, like depressing in a weird way and like, you know, smelly or something, you know what I mean? And and and there have been times where I've like gone out to a sports bar and watched like the US team at the World Cup and it was great and it was like all these passionate fans and stuff. There have been times like I was in New York during the

Capitals when they eventually crapped out of the playoffs this year and I saw their their last two playoff games against the Penguins at the sports bar in the East Village. I forget what I was called. And that was like one of those things where it was like the game six that they won just like the way people would like, I don't know, just like chant or yell at like,

yeah, I want to win and I know it's just like on TV or whatever just like so much attitude was so like negative and aggressive and stuff that that felt really and like so like, sorry, Sydney and stuff, you know, or Sydney or Cindy like when Sydney Crosby wants to be on screen and calling him Cindy and I don't know. There was there wasn't a lot. I just heard whatever it was just like I was like,

fuck, why do I like this? I don't want to be here. But that was one specific incident and then and that was when the team I liked was winning. And so I don't know. I'm kind of mixed on them. I would say this that I feel like the sports bar experience. The ideal is something that you a communal experience where you

don't have too much invested in the outcome because I feel like it's it's fun to watch something where that you wouldn't maybe otherwise care about as much. But if it's a game I really care about, like if like, you know, if it's like it was like a Lakers playoff game, like I don't want to be watching that in the sports bar with a bunch of people who I mean, you know,

I may not they may not be sympatic with me. Like I'd rather watch that with some friends in someone's place or at home. I feel that way now. Yeah. But by the way, Neil, smelly and smelly and depressing are two of my defining characters. I I have watched like the Red Sox win playoff games at

Simon McLean's and it's been a great experience. Like it's been like not like I didn't see too much of maybe there was some of that stuff, but like like like not too much negativity as much as kind of like. Yeah. I remember watching World Cup games and it wasn't like people were like, fuck you, Ghana or whatever. You know,

it was it was like just people are rooting and you can just feel people be like. Yeah. World Cup is a great example because I watched a I watched a World Cup game, a Netherlands game with a bunch of of people who were like that were Netherlands fans and in a communal environment and like that was like a I wouldn't otherwise give a shit about this,

but I suddenly became invested just because of like the the energy of the crowd. Well, I also I have direct TV, so I haven't been able to watch the Dodgers at home in years. Oh, yeah. They don't have their network and. Oh, yeah. And so it's almost become like a fun thing and there's this bar here,

Hyperion public that's like I wouldn't fully call it a sports bar and it's not like there's pinnets up on the wall and jerseys and shit, but it's also got flat screen TVs, like six of them in the bar area. So like that's pretty close to being a sports bar. Right. I mean, they're showing sports, right? Yes.

Okay. Yeah. They don't have six TVs showing film struck criteria and films. So it's that's become like maybe a fun thing this past year. Right. Occasionally on a Saturday or a Sunday afternoon or something, I'd go over there and watch like a Dodgers game.

But again, it's the middle of season. I don't really care about the outcome. Right. It was just kind of a fun experience. I feel like the chances you get to like watch a great game in a sports bar and have enjoyed doing it a team that you that you care about. It's like there's like it will happen like a couple times. Maybe it's kind of a perfect storm.

Yeah. Well, let's talk about the specific sports bar that we're viewing this week. ESPN zone. I've been there a couple of times. It's down in Anaheim. The only one that still remains is in Anaheim, not far from. It's in downtown Disney. It's a stone's throw from Disneyland proper.

And I'd been to this location before probably a decade ago. And I think I've also been to the ESPN zone in Vegas. I thought I went to the one in an LA live, the downtown LA one that closed a few years ago. But then I was thinking back on was I'm not sure if I ever actually went there. It's possible I did, but I don't have a clear memory of it. I just remember. I think I think I think I went there.

So I don't know, but fuck it, my brain is broken at this point. But the ESPN, but I went there. I remember the food. I remember. Here's the thing. I don't remember the food at all. Like I've been there a number of times. There was nothing about it that struck me as memorable.

And did you guys have, had you guys had any ESPN zone experiences prior to this? Never been. Never been. I had been to one, but I think I maybe went to the LA live one once. Okay. And maybe went to one other, but I had been before. Right.

Yes. I was very foggy to me. The main thing I remember is just like the, the volume of TVs. And when you get in there, cause, cause Neil, you and I were waiting for Mitch for a little bit. So he went to the fuck. We went to hold on a second. We beat you there by a little bit.

You, you were, you weren't on time. What do you mean? I wasn't on time. You were not on time. I wasn't. No, I think I'm actually pretty sure. I was checking the, I was checking the clock. And when you said that you were walking over, you were five minutes late.

Okay. All right. Well, in any event, you and I were still, we're still earlier than Mitch. And we, we had some time there. You'd put our, you'd put our name in. I'm going to bring up that text message too. Cause I want to check the timestamps. Um, but in any event, uh,

Ooh, I hope I'm right. We were, we were actually, I don't know how to check that, the timestamps on iMessage. Well, too bad you piece of shit. I could bring it up. No, don't. Let's see here. Okay.

My second most recent text. Here we go. Okay. I see that this chain started at 1249 PM. I said, I'm here at 1249. And then I said, I put us on the wait list at 1250. Okay. You were walking through security at 1254.

Okay. All right. Now hold on a second. We were down in Anaheim. Right. It was a long drive. Right. Yes.

But we knew that too. In any event here, we've gotten derailed. Uh, I was on time. And so you, You were late. Definitely. I was on time. I don't think you got to the ESPN zone in six minutes.

There's a, it's a seated at 103. Yeah. Probably wanted a 102. In any event, we, we walked over to the, they have like this giant Vegas sports book area. And it actually is pretty impressive.

Like it's like a great, I mean, it looks just like a Vegas sports book, a gigantic projection TV, like a, you know, six TVs flanking it, and then a bunch of more TVs in the bar area. So basically just like a bunch of sports going on. Feels like that'd be a great way to watch a game, but we were actually seated outside.

Yeah. So this was, I got like, as has been established, I got there first. And when I put my name in, they asked two questions. They asked, would you like to sit? Do you have any preference where you sit? Yeah.

And I said, no. And I had already poked my head around just a little to get the lay of the land, because you could go right and go to that sports book area. You could go left. You kind of curve around like underneath the stairs or something. And there's a bar and then there's a seating area.

And I just poked around a little, still lots of TVs over there too. TVs everywhere. So I said, no, I don't care where we sit. And then they said, is there any game you're here to watch? Or are you also about to switch to the afternoon game? Big question.

And I said, no, no, no specific game. And I went, all right. And yeah. So anyway. So yeah, we were seated outside. But here's the thing. I think that they should tell you that there's 100% an outside area,

because you don't know that there's an outside area walking over there and walking in. And no one, it's not like the local neighborhood restaurant that like, yeah, sorry, you didn't know it knew come or everyone else who comes here knows. It's a restaurant that is only going to cater to tourists

who were there for the first time ever. May go there once in their life. And like you're saying, well, can you see it anywhere? And I go, yeah. You should add there's an outdoor area that isn't like flanks by TVs everywhere. There's two smaller flat screens

with a lot of glare like 17 inches and the sun is shining directly. I could not see a second of either game. Yeah. And so we could and you're not getting any of whether you like it or hate it. If you're going there to give them your money, presumably you like the atmosphere of a sports bar

of having people around cheering and getting like worked up over games and stuff. Just like not even tell us but you're like, can it do, do you have any privacy? No, I'll sit anywhere to not say like, okay, the outside is just basically sitting on the sidewalk. Two TVs you can't watch and like in the sun,

except for under an umbrella that we repositioned. It felt like a fuck you. It felt like what they do if they were like trying to punish you. And there were a lot of empty tables, by the way, which I assume were for reservations or something, but it's just weird. Very weird reservations.

I really don't know if there were any reservations at that place. But also, Nick, how dare you let our guests get there before and either you or I, you should have been there. I got there very early. I was worried I'd be late. I gave a son me a lot of time. Shame on you, Weigar, for not showing up before our guests.

It's my responsibility to get there a half hour early in case our guest is early is what you're saying. Yes. Mitch, we've had we've had guests beat you to your own house. I don't know how that happens. Hold on a second. Because I'm working. Yeah.

All right. I also work sometimes. I'm not a guy who just sits here and plays Zelda all day, even though that is what I was doing when Neil got here. So so I walked in and saw a bunch of empty tables when I was looking for you guys and went outside into the hellscape that was the outdoor seating. Yeah.

And I thought it was a good way to kick off. Are you using the word hellscape because you just looked at our text chain? Yes, where I used the word hellscape to describe the parking parking leaving the parking lot area after we were done. It is. That's the exact reason why. I that's the exact reason why.

So the ESPN zone, we're sitting down there. We put our drink orders in. I went with that. I got a cocktail for by beverage. I got the ESPN. I feel like it's seen. This feels like it would be something to be one of their premier drinks.

Myers platinum rum, creme de banana, shambord, pineapple juice, orange juice and grenadine. I thought the ESPN was you. You had a better ESPN than me, Mitch. Yes. The ESPN that I had. I would have let you have a sip, but you were very sick. I was.

Yeah. I was getting over something or no, I was just getting into something. I think you're all healthy now. I think so. Are you healthy? I don't know. I feel better.

Stop touching shit in my house. Well, you're a bug chaser. Yeah. For like, for like the common cold. Yes. Yes. With a with a with the short term curable on this is. So no, I had the, I had the ESPN and mine was very bad.

Mine was like very mediciney. It just take it like a tell it tasted like a melted cough drop. I thought it was just like really the flavor was horrible. I got like a very light buzz from it, but I feel like there, there wasn't a lot of alcohol in that drink. I thought, I thought it was a pretty terrible tropical cocktail. Yeah.

I don't know. What did you guys get for your beverages? I got a Bloody Mary. Right. The ultimate Bloody Mary was it, which is okay. They use Tito's vodka, I believed. I'm a Tito's fan. Yeah.

And it was not bad. Yeah. The right off the bat, I said, this isn't bad. Sure. Nice. You know, I'm having a decent Bloody Mary. Right. This could turn out good.

I had iced tea and I would say it actually was not great iced tea. Wow. But, you know, I finished it also. So it wasn't like repulsive or anything. Right. It's just like, yeah, yeah. All right. And ice cold iced tea sitting on the porch at ESPN zone.

Just like back in the day. Looks like it's going to turn cold soon. It was very frustrating that this place was inside was cavernous. And outdoors was just like these two tables. Right. There were three people outside. Yeah. And there were plenty of seats.

Like you said, we had to position the umbrella so that I wouldn't get a sunburn. And we covered Neil and I up. You were sick. You were kind of sitting in the sun a little bit, Nick, right? Yeah. But it was just like this dinky. The whole thing was this kind of dinky patio area that wasn't particularly. Yeah.

Hard to explain how different it was just stuffing it. You like it just you're in this like, okay, a big theme restaurant. And then you were not in a big theme restaurant. Yeah. You were in a like you could be anywhere. Right. I mean, that was that was just like that. I feel like the main minus for the experience.

We got some apps. I use another one. You said that the restaurant was cavernous in your texts. Oh, did I? So we got the the apps. We got some we got some boneless chicken wings with buffalo sauce. I'm not a boneless man. I like them bone in, but I'm fine to go with the boneless, the boneless route.

We also got the zone nachos with brisket, melted cheddar mozzarella pepper jack and refried white beans. And, you know, they also had some like pico de gallo and some cilantro on there and some sour cream, I think on the side, some guac, maybe it was a. I mean, they were I don't know what you guys think of those apps. Well, we Neil and I both we were each trying a different app at the same time. And then we both said basically the same thing about both of them. I was eating the nachos and I was like, these are decent, but they're cold.

And I was like, yeah, I just bit into one of these buffalo things. Right. It was kind of cold. Yeah. And it was like, it's I don't know what happened. It took a little bit for the food to come, but not even that long. But like, was it just sitting in the air conditioned inside there for for a couple of months?

Yeah, I don't know. They just didn't heat it up enough. It was like, yeah, really weird. The first bite of a buffalo, whatever ball, like boneless buffalo wing. Like that. It was a little bit cold. It was strange. Yeah.

It was kind of, it was kind of, I mean, room temp to be is like the charitable way you could say, but it felt it tasted cold. It felt. Yes. It felt it felt like there was like still a little bit in there, but it was it was leaving quickly. I said they got it out to us fairly quickly. So I don't think that they left it on the count.

I don't think it was like a service error. I think it was a, they didn't just didn't put a lot of heat into it. It was, it was a bummer to me because I thought both of them. And like you said, I got the SB as well. Mine was good. So I had these two good drinks and I thought the appetizers actually tasted decent if they were, if they had been served hot, I think that they would have been good.

I think those boneless wings would have been good. I think the nachos, I mean, I feel like they didn't have enough cheese. I feel like that was a main issue with it because like cheese is kind of the main chips and cheese. That's, that's the base level nachos. If you're going to do basic nachos and chips and cheese, I feel like they didn't have a good cheese distribution on those nachos. I feel like it was a little sparse.

The brisket was good. The brisket was good. Yeah. I mean a little chewy, but that was fine. Coca-Cola. It was, it was out of words or Dr. Pepper or something like that. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. I thought the nachos were fine. We're like, but the temperature was the main issue. Yeah. And then the buffalo things, they were fine, but it's like, it's so hard. Literally like Pizza Hut's one of the only places that can fuck up buffalo wings where you get them in the slimy and like almost any other place I've ever had a buffalo thing.

You're just like, like, yeah, you cover it with that Frank's red husks or whatever the sauce is that people use for a buffalo stuff, just buffalo wing sauce, I guess. And you fry chicken and it's like, yeah, it's going to taste pretty good. And that's what it, apart from, I mean, it was cold. Like they, they truly, I guess, didn't find a way to, to temper it, but it was, it was, yeah, it was fine. It was right.

Yeah. Yeah. I would say that the heat level of those, those apps was about a 48 out of a hundred. Hmm. You and your, the text chain you said, number 48 on the list. I saw that too. So let's move on to our mains.

So I asked for recommendation from our server who I thought was very nice. I thought, yeah, the service. Very pleasant. This is where we're talking about it. I would say, yeah, I thought the service was great. Yeah. That was in a way that like saving grace of the places. They're very attentive and checking, but not intrusive.

Right. Very friendly. Very friendly. And it always had record, like seem to actually have recommendations. Yeah. Wasn't just like, it's all good. Right. And well, I took our, took our server up on one of her recommendations, which was,

I got the house smoked ribs for my entree full slab of barbecue baby back ribs with french fries. The fries to me were the best bite of that whole meal. I thought they were, they were good. I thought they had a good temperature that they had a good seasoning to them. They kind of had not quite like a curly fry seasoning, but they had some season salt on them. So they had a little bit of just a little bit of spice to them that was different than

than just, you know, your traditional salt and oil that you're getting from them fries. The ribs, there were a lot of ribs. I mean, like I just, like that full slab, it was just a substantial portion. They were big ribs too. I mean, like, here's the thing. The sauce I feel like was just too sweet, just like too sugary and syrupy sweet. Well, I mean, like I like barbecue, but I just like that sauce can't be like maple syrup sweet to me.

And then I feel like the meat was just kind of like chewy and tough. It wasn't like that. Sometimes you get those ribs that are smoked and they get the fall off the bone. It wasn't like that. It was kind of just like it. It was just kind of tough. And I feel like it was just been cooked to death, but not in a good way. It was just kind of this gray, unsatisfying meat.

What did you guys get for your mains? I got the buttermilk fried chicken sandwich. I look, I messed up. We later that day, we went to our next restaurant. Yeah, we also had chicken, a different type of chicken. Yeah. And so I was trying to like figure out what to do. And I was like, Oh, we got the brisket on the nachos.

And I went with this buttermilk fried chicken sandwich. I also thought it would be good. Yeah. But I definitely should have gone with a burger. Right. I should have gone with some, some, some red meat. This was bread chicken breast with a house made spicy nash sauce coleslaw coleslaw comma spread in a brioche bun served with french fries.

Man, like the, the, like the, the spread or whatever the hell was on it. Like it was like a bunch of vegetables. It was fucking disgusting. Like a Vegemite. It was like vet, like a bunch of like chopped up vegetables. Oh, weird. And it tasted like fucking dirt. Like, like it was, it was, it ruined the sandwich.

It was, it was terrible. And she was like, you want ranch for my, like my fries and she brought ranch. And I was going to dip the sandwich and ranch by the sandwich. Like the chicken was decent. Yeah. What a bummer. But the, but the, the weird topping on top just ruined the entire thing. Yeah.

That sucks. And the fries were just, but they were fine. They were okay. And so the sandwich was a huge, huge let down to me. I shouldn't have gone. I should have gone with a burger, which I believe Neil, I think you did. I got the titular burger, the ESPN zone. That's right.

With a gluten free bun that I'd see how that was. And it wasn't very good. It was like, um, just like a gray patty that felt like, like a burger. You'd get it like a carnival or something, like walking around and like would be in a paper tray or whatever. And, and you know, with slab of tomato and some lettuce on it. And, you know, or like a, I don't know, like a lunch, like a cafeteria burger or something like that.

Like I also, by the way, the fries were fine. And I'm like, when I do go out to eat, I typically am like, all right, I watch what I eat most of the time. So I'll enjoy this. And I like clean my plate typically. And I did, you know, we had some apps and stuff. So that's part of it. But I was like, I didn't finish the fries.

I didn't finish the burger. Yeah. I mean, I like, and it wasn't like, oh, I'm being good. I was like, I can't eat more of this. Like it hit a point where I was like, ugh, I don't want to put more of this in me. Right. And everyone had stuff left on their plate. Yeah.

It wasn't fun enough to justify how unhealthy it was. Like it wasn't nearly like, it was just like, I was like, you will have those meals that are like cheap meals or like indulgences at one of the, the food itself isn't satisfying. It's such a like, what a let down that I'm consuming all this unhealthy garbage. And I'm not even getting the satisfaction of eating something delicious. Mitch, by the way, I'm getting, I'm getting so hot. I'm getting lightheaded. Oh, really?

Yeah. I feel like it's really, are you guys not hot? I'm like super hot in here. I'm kind of warm. Yes. You song, please. Thank you. Sorry.

You songs flying the AC remote over. But anyway, the, the air is on, Nick. Thanks, buddy. But at any event, like I feel like, yeah, that, that was my main issue with the place is like, I kind of want the sense of fun. I think maybe the food would have tasted a little bit different if we'd been in there and we'd been in that atmosphere and we'd been watching the game. I feel like we would have focused on it less than it has been like.

Sunlight streaming onto my gray burger. Right. Like I noticed that you pushed your side salad into the direct sunlight. Wait a minute. I have a hot salad. You wanted a hot salad. I didn't ask for a side salad and then try to warm it up with your son. Come on.

With the earth son. That's a baseless allegation. It's also Mars' son. Let's get to our final thoughts on ESPN zone. Oh, we, we, we, a dessert we thought about and we weren't even like. No, we didn't want it. We, we were, it was, it was too much of a bummer. So let's get to our final thoughts on ESPN zone.

So Neil, you've done the podcast before, but just a reminder, the way this will work is we'll go around. We'll each sort of give our final thoughts on this chain and then a scribe iterating on the order of zero to five, not forks because it's juctober fest. Gatorade jugs. We'll begin with you. And these ones are the lids are Mickey Mouse. They're in the shape of Mickey Mouse's head.

Okay. But sides don't stay on the sideline. Sides are not on the sideline. They're on the field. They're in the field. Okay. I'm not the other part of that guy. What was the other thing that's lost?

Drinks are in the Gatorade jug, which we're now using it for ruling. Right. So this is, I thought it, yeah. This podcast triggered something in me. Okay. The drinks are still in the Gatorade jug, but this is, they're being used for a different purpose. They're on the field because they're being used in the gradation.

So, okay. My experience. Like most people, okay. I suck at this. So, you know, we drove down to Anaheim. Most people are driving an hour to get there, but I was excited because I don't see either of you guys as often as I'd like. And I was mostly just excited to share a meal with two friends.

I don't see as much as I like. Oh, that's nice. And so, yeah, we drove down to Anaheim. Parking takes a little bit because it was, it's downtown Disney, which has separate parking from the theme park, but it's still a lot of vehicles and, you know, a lot to deal with. Parking was fun. Once we were in, it was fine.

It just took a little while to get there. You got to get through the security line to get into this area downtown Disney. They have bomb sniffing dogs, which, where were those when they were making John Carter? I wrote that down when I got there. And I was like, oh, this is too good. I'll use this joke on the podcast. And then I just remembered it.

Worth it. Worth it. Anyway, but see, it's a lot to get in there. Right. Now that might not be the typical experience. Most people who are debating whether or not to eat there might be staying at the like hotel right by the park or something. Yeah.

Anyway, or having a whole day there. So they're not really like deciding, should I eat here? Should I drive out of my way to go to ESPN? Sure. They're like, I'm here. Am I going to eat at one of the, which of the four restaurants? Right. I'm a captive audience.

Rain Fat Forest Cafe. Yeah. You know. Or Earl of Sandwich. Yes, but I can only describe my experience. And I mean, it was kind of a strike out. It was the food was not very good. Literally some of it cold, which goes beyond even like taste.

The, our experience there with the host and how they sat us was insane. Yeah. That they did not ask, they did not let me know there is a section that does not like feel like what it feels like in here. Right. And there are, you can't, it's not easy to see the TVs. You can't. So that there's only two and you can't, you're not getting all the games everywhere.

You're not getting people cheer. That was like so crazy. Right. I guess it felt like a slap in the face. It was like, why did we do? Are you so mad at us? And yeah. So the only saving grace was that our server was very nice.

And since I'm not reviewing a chain, we're viewing one that is the only one in the world. Right. I'll give her all the credit for one Gatorade jug. Wow. They, otherwise it was pretty much a zero. Wow. I did. Our server was very nice and helpful.

Yeah. And also brought an extra glass of ice for my ST. Yeah. That was the sun and it was melting and stuff. It was very attentive and good. Very friendly. I don't want to be the one guy by the way. Right.

I thought this, I was like, no, going into this, not thinking I would be a curmudgeon. Yeah. You said what's in your heart. This is well deserved. I think maybe I'm a little bit higher, but not much higher. So after, look, we made Neil our friend. Like you said, you said you covered everything of we don't get to see too often. We get to have a meal with you.

We made you drive down an hour. Early. Wiger wasn't there. It's ridiculous. I drive down. My ways takes me off of route five into some weird territory. Meanwhile, Wiger is not there for you. The parking was insane and terrible.

We're supposed to be there at one. What time did you leave like 1240? I did leave. I left before you left. I think I can't. I can't. I left it like I left it. I left it to like 12 something, 12, 10 or something for real.

You did not leave before I left. I left like 1145. All right. And I left after you. According to ways I was supposed to be there in time. I did Apple Maps and I switched to waves. Listen, I don't, I was late. I'm sorry.

It's all right. I thought I was going to be on time. And we get down there. There was a lot of traffic. Right. The parking was, was bad. Oh, and then leaving it was worse. Leaving it was worse.

Getting through the, actually Neil, Nick and I didn't have too bad leaving. Oh, really? It's actually pretty easy. It's pretty good. Not a bad time. I wonder, yeah. Is there like a movie theater in there? I wonder if like, oh, could be.

Yeah. There's an AMC. Yeah. You got to go through security and then you're sit in this shitty place. ESPN is bad now. There's a broadcast booth for like where they like would sometimes do what looks like they would do like live broadcast at the restaurant. It's like old and dusty.

No one, like it seems like no one uses it anymore ever. Mike and Mike aren't there. Mike and Mike are definitely not there. It feels like it should be dead. There's an arcade upstairs. Yeah. It just is so obviously a place where people are at Disney or something or nearby and they want to watch sports games.

They want to watch football or something on Sunday when they're with their family at Disney World. Right. And so that's, Dad needs a break. Dad needs a break. It's so obviously a place like that. But I was sitting there with my friends trying to rejoice out in the sun, empty tables inside

this cavernous place. I go to this hellscape and I'm sitting there with my friends and we're not experiencing the real thing. The second thing about is Earl of sandwich across the way or more so, how much fun the three of us or a group of us would have at Disney, which is right there, which is, which is this far drive down and this is a part of Disney, but it just, it just fucking it's it sucked. And then on top of all that, I felt so sick.

I won't tell you where we went. We went to a restaurant later that night, which was fun. We had a good time. You felt sick in a different way than me. I was so you were like food sick, so food sick. I was sweating. Like I was like sweating. I felt like if a food poisoning, I don't know what it was.

I felt like so much like shit because I think that food was just, just sucked. Yeah. And Nick, you know, afterwards, besides being able to hang with Neil for a few, but the highlight after the restaurant was we went and got some Starbucks drinks. We got some iced teas. Yeah. I got a hot tea and I got a, I got a strawberry green tea. Yeah.

Better than anything I had at ESPN. Better than anything we had there. I'd say the drinks are okay and the drinks, the drinks at ESPN are okay. My espies was, was okay. And then the apps that they were warm would have been okay, but they, it just wasn't any of that. And so we had Starbucks that was better and we went to the Disney, the original Disneyland hotel and we looked in there for a few minutes.

I went to the bathroom because I felt sick and that was better than being at ESPN. So just be, just looking at the lobby of the original Disney hotel. I will say I feel a little self conscious as like an adult man by himself, like waiting in the lobby of the Disneyland hotel. When I came upstairs, they were putting you in a patty wagon. I had to tell them, no, no, he's with me and they let us go off together, I guess. But it was, it was a bummer to drive all the way down there. What a bummer ESPN.

You're on thin ice. I don't know if you'll ever recover and I don't know if this place will ever recover. I don't think anyone should go to it. Yeah. A fork and a half. Wow. Until, until a revisit. A fork and a half.

A fork. Yeah. Wait, you're supposed to do Gatorade jugs. Oh, uh, one in, uh, three quarters Gatorade jug. Wait, it went up? Your score's higher? It's an, it's an intricate system. Okay.

It's like a, it's like Canadian to US dollars doesn't convert one to one. Um, all right, here's the thing. I had a feeling this wasn't going to be great because I knew it was kind of a gimmick restaurant. I was like, I thought it was going to be fun to go down there sports bars like this. They can be fun. They can be fun and they can have good food. They're sports bars with genuinely good food. I feel like if we,

Hey, Sonny McClain's. Yeah. The Sonny McClain's back in the day. I feel like if we'd sat in a, in a inside and watched the game, this would have been like a two Gatorade jug experience probably all around because we were exiled outside. Uh, I think that we, I think the lower scores are deserved because that was part of our dining experience. And if you evaluate it on those merits, it's, it's just a, a bad restaurant.

I feel like the, this chain deserves to have receded to its current state where, you know, once was something that had a bunch of locations and now it's one with one final location that just kind of hanging on maybe because ESP or Disney doesn't want to, like the optics of shutting down the last ESPN zone right near Disneyland and it seems to be doing good business. I mean, there seem to be a lot of people there, at least on an NFL Sunday, but just, just a, just not good. Just like the food was, was terrible.

I mean, I didn't have a good cocktail, but I imagine if I'd had a draft beer, it probably would have been fine. There probably are good cocktails in the menu, but I just, I thought everything was just, was just mediocre at best and, and just like bad and not fun to eat, uh, at worst. I mean, how fitting that the, the brand that perpetuated deflate gate has now deflated itself. Hey. You know what? Hell yeah.

That's my favorite thing you've ever said. Uh, I gotta give one Gatorade jug to ESPN zone. Yeah. We're not pouring Gatorade on you either. ESPN zone. So, you know, we'll maybe fake you out with a Gatorade jug filled with snakes. Yeah. All of my, my jugs are all filled with snakes as I assume your guys, uh, I wonder if part

of it is like sports bars are just a thing that are in every town. Right. Corporatize a sports bar is like robbing it of what you enjoy about a sports bar in the first place. Right. You know, but, but I guess at the same time, like, but I like hooters and stuff is kind of that, isn't it? Yeah.

I love her. Buffalo Wild Wings is one of my favorite current chains. Yeah. Great time every time I go. Okay. So I'm wrong. They just fucked up. Yeah.

There's a good way to do it. My jugs are filled with slugs. Neil, what are, what are your jugs filled with? Bugs. And Nick? I already established snakes. I mean, I, I'll say, I'll say drugs. Yeah.

Yeah. Like bad drugs. Oh, no. Like, like, you know, you meant dilatum. Nuke? Yeah. They filled with nuke. That was our review of ESPN.

So it's time for a new segment. I just want to say, uh, we're, we're at half time now for the, for the game, you know, yard house and this and, uh, the Doughboys are down. I feel like, Oh, but you think we're down. You think we're down? We're gonna have to make a comeback. In the second half with yard house, it was okay. Yeah.

And this one was bad. No way. Yeah. This one's no way. Yeah. Okay. No way. Now it's the second half.

What's going to happen? I mean, I feel like we got it with the two of us on the field. I mean, we don't have a chance. Yeah. We need to rally. We're fine. Under enlightening. Uh, it's time for a new segment.

We've got a food from a foreign land and we're going to see how we yanks like it. This is international house of hot takes. And let me introduce this week's food. When the moon hits your plate like a big piece of cake, that's a mooncake. When the world seems real neat like you've had a sweet treat, that's a mooncake. All right. So we've got some. All your music.

Yeah. We've got some mooncakes from China. These are courtesy of you songs parents. Hey, you song, you want to come over here real quick and, uh, and actually these are from you song to me, right? Yeah. Oh, these are from you song. This is not from you song's parents.

I'm sorry. I apologize. And they were to me. And they were to Mitch. For my birth. Well, and I'm sharing them with you. Mitch is being very nice and sharing them with the group. I apologize, you song.

Do you want to hop on the mic real quick and give us some backstory on these? Um, uh, yeah, it's the Mid Autumn Festival or Zhongqiujie, um, in China right now. And so, uh, everyone's eating mooncakes. I thought if you find an appropriate since it's, um, close to Mitch's birthday. And these are the thing I assume you've had before in the past. Yes. I love these. You're, you're a huge fan of the mooncakes.

Okay. Well, we will be, we will be honest. We'll be tough, but fair on these, uh, keeping your feelings in mind and we're, and you song. Thank you for the gift. That is very nice. Thank you so much. Yeah.

So the different flavors of these are, uh, wait, well, I had them listed at one point. Where did that? They're on the bottom. Oh, are they on the bottom of the box? No, no, no, no, no. Bottom, bottom, bottom. We've got the red bean. We've got Lotus.

We've got pineapple and red date, uh, courtesy of you, song or voice and coordinator. I wonder how Lotus will be. Yeah. I'm, I'm, I'm wondering, but yeah, let's sort of dig into these. I think they're split up like this. This is each. You've got to subdivide. Right.

You song. Okay. So the, so, so we each take, there'll be a one for you song. Oh, great. Take a half down like that. Right. A lot of fun. Okay.

Great. Um, so guys, feel free to dig in and let us know what you're digging into. I'm just going to, I'm going to just take my halfs right now to be easier. Yeah. Okay. There we go. So they, they, they kind of look like, I'm trying to think of what, what exactly they resemble for someone who's maybe not had one of these.

I mean, they're these little round pastries with a, it's kind of like a puff pastry shell, but not quite. Um, they've got a golden brown, brown texture to them and then a lot of filling inside. Like it's a generous amount of filling. Neela, do you pass me that plate real quick so I can grab my portion? The insides don't, the insides are, um, I should have gotten paper towels. There we go. Here we go.

Um, here I've got, I've got some leftover napkins. I've got some leftover napkins from one of our other restaurants. I'll pass these around. There you are. Thank you. So the insides all look, uh, similar, which I thought that, I thought the insides would look like a, but they, they're all like, like, I can tell that the lighter shaded one is probably pineapple.

Um, but I'm going to, I'm going to, I'm going to dig in and see. Yeah. I'm going to start with this lighter colored one. Let's see what happens. I think I got red bean. Uh, they're pretty, I mean, they are like drier than you might expect for a dessert like this. This is the first one that I had.

Okay. I'm not sure which flavor this is. I mean, it kind of has a beanie texture, but it could be, it could be really anything. I just had one that was very Fig Newton-y. So I feel like that was probably the, um, me too. I thought, oh, maybe that is date. It's good. I like the Fig Newton-y one.

It's kind of like a, yeah, it very much reminds me of a Fig Newton-y, you know, that's a great comparison. I mean, the chewiness is really good. You're just going to bite into these and then you just can kind of, kind of just chew on them. They got like a good, like they're, they're chewy in a good way. They're not like too, too gummy or take, or too gelatinous. Um, I think the texture is really nice.

Yeah. The flavors, I mean, like the one thing I like about Asian desserts in general, and this might be speaking in two, this might be painted with too broad of a brush, but I feel like they're less sweet than Western desserts. And I feel like Western desserts oftentimes, particularly what you'll run into in America is just so loaded with sugar that it's, it's almost just overwhelming for me. Um, but these are, these are really nice and well balanced and you can taste the, the flavors that come.

Oh, I got the pineapple one. The pineapple one is, is chewier. Yeah. Um, it's good. I like it. I like the pineapple one. Yeah. I'm biting into another one right here.

This is one of the darker ones. I've had the two lighter colored ones so far. I'm still not entirely clear on which ones I've had, which ones have you guys eaten? Have you figured out the key at all yet? I think that I've had a pineapple one and I think that I have had, I think Neil's right that the, the, the, the Fig Newton tasting one is the date. Okay. So I'm looking at yours.

I think I've also had the, the pineapple one then I've had a pineapple one and maybe the lotus one. I think the pineapple is the chewiest, like, and then the others are more solid consistency. And then when you take a bite through, you can tell which one's red bean. It's way redder than the date one. Right. And then the other two are more yellow. I do.

Do you guys have any sort of, uh, uh, thoughts on red beans because it's something I've encountered before Din Tai Fung, which is a dumpling house, international chain, which we should, we should probably review at some point. It's great. That's what, that's the number one favorite family style Friday restaurant at, uh, Brooklyn at night. Whoa. Okay.

Yeah. That place is awesome, but they have a red bean dumpling as a dessert and it's, it's delicious. I haven't had that. Um, I like the lotus one. It's very, it like opposite of the pineapple one. It's very easy to chew, but it feels the least flavorful. What is, what is, what is lotus is a flower? What is it?

Radiohead song. Oh, it's a song. They mashed up Radiohead CDs. Yeah. Yeah. Weird. Um, yeah, I really, I like probably the red bean the most, but I like, um, like, I like when I go down to like a little Tokyo or, or yeah, or any, any area, um, that has sort

of like, uh, uh, pastries with like the red bean filling. Yeah. I like one of those when I, when I'm around it, right, isn't too often and that, you know, there's sort of like, they'll do the same kind of, you know, sticky bun type thing with like red bean or with like green tea kind of filling matcha. Yeah. And, um, uh, I really like those. So it feels like we've had, like, we've seen matcha kind of used in some, uh, some like,

like, you know, fine dining restaurants have kind of come up with their own matcha based desserts. And I wonder if red beans are going to make an appearance at some point, if that's going to be a thing where like some Western chefs are going to take a day or some, some fusion chefs are going to try and use that as an element and some desserts. Red bean may be my, my, actually may be my least favorite of the, Oh, interesting. It just has a very like, um, you can taste, it tastes like, it tastes kind of beanie

a little bit. Yeah. I kind of like it. I mean, I like it, but I, I think that these are all good. I think they're all good. I think I'd probably go, I would go snack for all of them. Yeah. I'd go snack for all of them.

I think I'd probably go snack or lack. Yeah. You're right. It's not sac-a-wack. It's not sac-a-wack takes. We need some different metric. Um, but I think I would probably rank these honestly from darkest to least dark in terms of, of favoritism.

Like I really like the, I really like the, uh, the date one a lot, the red bean one. I like a lot too. Oh yeah. That's right. I do. Wow. Jesus. Um, and the pineapple one, I mean, it's, it's like, you know, the, the pineapple flavor

I feel like could be, I would like it if it was maybe a little bit more forward. The lotus one is just so subtle and also just so dry that I feel like it's maybe the one that I'd be less likely to revisit, uh, if I had my, my pick of these. Hey, you son, get over here real quick. I'm curious what your, what your favorites are of these different varieties and there, are there other ones that we don't have in this variety pack that you are a fan of? Um, there's definitely other ones. Some regions have them with like meat in the, uh, as a filling.

Oh, that's fun. Um, but still as a dessert or is it like a savory version? Definitely like, um, I'm not sure if it would be a dessert, but it's just like a, a fun thing to eat. Right. At this time of year. Would they be, would they be served warm or no? The meat one.

Would the meat ones be served warm? Um, you caught me. Um, I'm, I'm not really sure, but, um, I personally never had one heated up. Um, and I also really liked the red bean one as my, uh, yeah, we're team red bean. So, uh, yeah, you songs are red bean guy. Red bean my least favorite. What's going on around here? How about this?

Red bean is my least favorite. Um, interesting. Um, but, uh, how, how, why don't we do it this way? As Americans based off of this food, would we welcome China into the United Nations or would we, we punish them with sanctions? China is welcomed into the United Nations. Yeah, I agree. I think they're, they're welcome in and they, they can retain their seat on the security

council as far as I'm concerned. I think we should start adding movies to see, uh, scenes to movies specifically to cater to the Chinese market. That's a great idea. I, I, um, I like, um, pineapple number one, yeah, then Lotus interesting, then date, then red bean. Wow. Almost an opposite.

Almost flipped it on you. I might be the opposite. Hmm. I like pineapple. Yeah. They're all good though. They're all very, very good. Yeah.

They're no losers here. Uh, thanks to you song. Very nice to you. Thank you. And Nick, you can share my birthday day by coming out and hanging out. I'm going to come out. Why, why wouldn't I come out? Um, that was international house of hot takes, just like a restaurant value feedback.

Let's open up the feedback. Today's email comes to us from Efren in Chicago. Efren writes, I'm Mexican and we make tamales on a yearly basis. When I was younger, we invited a friend for dinner who had never had tamales before. He spent a good minute trying to cut through the corn husk before we noticed and advised him to unwrap the husk to get at the delicious innards. Have you guys ever eaten something the wrong way? I think so.

The question, Efren. What, what do you guys think? Any, any pretty straightforward asks there? Um, I got to think on this for a second, but what it reminds me of so is for whatever reason this is bird in my memory, one of those things that you watch in school that was probably like a made for PBS type program, right? I just remember one that I watched that was about like immigration and I think it was like a little Polish kid or something moves to the United States and the scene I always remember

is they give him a banana to eat and they're like, eat it, eat it. These sort of like bully kids, um, who are making fun of the new Polish kid or whatever he is. And he like, isn't sure what to do when he tries to bite into it through the peel. They're like, oh, you're supposed to peel it. So, um, now that I've said that, I'll be quiet for a second as I think of it. If I've ever done something like that, was the, was the message of that film strip, uh, a, uh, then Polish ain't got the smart.

Yeah. Now that he went back to his submarine, had screen doors, tried to use his solar powered flashlight. Yeah. Well, I wouldn't. Yeah. Jay Roach made it in the early nights. Um, I, uh, I have one very specific thing.

This is not when I was a kid. This is when I was a, uh, living on my own. Actually the first, the only time I had an apartment all to myself was a summer. I was, I was interning at a company, Sun Microsystems in San Diego. I had a, like a, a small apartment for myself and I'd gotten a recipe to like, I was just like, oh, I'm like, I'll cook myself a, a dinner, uh, like from this recipe book. And it was something that called for a garlic clove and I'd never, I just never cooked with garlic before.

It was just something. And so I took the entire head of garlic and like thought it was just like an onion. And so I just like kind of just diced it up with an onion, like just like peeling some of the outer layers. I kind of got it in there and like, I had eaten garlic before certainly, but I had no idea what the fuck I was doing. And so then I just had all these like stringy pieces of garlic skin with it that just like kind of ruined this, uh, otherwise, you know, very normal tomato sauce I tried to make, but

I felt like a real dope. Oh, I realized my error. I had one occur to me. Yeah. I still don't have a lot of confidence with like lobster. Like when I go to like a nice buffet or whatever, like a breakfast thing and they were like lobster, they have lobster, I'll be like, oh, I'm good. It's just an omelet.

And it's 90% as because I'm like, I don't actually fully think I, I feel like I actually recently was shown in a way that maybe the next time I go, I'll retain the info and I'll be able to do it. But I've just been scared of embarrassing myself and not grabbed lobster at buffets because I'm not confident that I know what to do. Um, Lobster Sturkey. Crab I can't do still like, I feel like crab is tough and little blue crabs.

Yeah. Yeah. So there's crab legs. I can't, I, I, I can't do it. I can do it. A king crab leg. A place of low crabs or hard BCD tofu house. That's a chain you guys should have.

You know what? No, I think it's called BCD. I'm not sure. Um, but they have a, they have a bunch of, or there's several and there's, there's one at like Normandy ish and, um, West or Wilshire and Normandy or Wilshire and Western maybe. Uh, uh, and it's, uh, they have this like a soon tofu thing with a seafood, you could do the seafood mix and it always has like stuff in shells in the mix. And I'm like, I have no clue how I was supposed to get this stuff.

Right. But this is, that's my ignorance because I haven't, I don't think I fucked it up assuming I knew what to do. Yeah. The thing I remember fucking up the most was some job I worked when I first moved to LA or within a couple of years, I was like, doing some sort of like data entry type thing and I had to cut my, I worked weekends. So I think I had done training or whatever, but then I was like in there on a Saturday

and no one else was in there. Um, and I went to like the kitchen to make myself some coffee and I saw curing pods and I was like, oh, this just must be like a cool way to have like the right amount of coffee in a pot and they had a coffee maker next and they must have had a curing machine, but I didn't notice it and didn't pick up on it. And I was like, how the fuck, I just thought it was going to peel off the top. Right. And then it was like a single serving of coffee.

When you want to brew a coffee, just peel off the top of this thing, pour it into your coffee maker like you normally do and make a coffee. And I was like, I had like jamming at it with a knife to get it open. I was like, how am I fucking this up so bad? And it never, like, I just didn't figure out that I was like doing this wrong. And I like opened like two or three and like poured them into an actual filter coffee maker man and made a coffee, which I'm sure was bad. And then like, I, I think I like had like a staggered schedule.

So at some point I was in there with people, right? And I saw someone use like the curing machine. I was like, oh my God, I'm so dumb. So that's, that's what I'm thinking of. I think the first time I had it to Molly, I think I like was cutting into it and didn't make the same mistake. I had to be shown how to do it. Yeah.

I think that's what you opened it up. I feel like in like the, within the last five years, you're going to laugh at me, Nick, but I feel like I like took the first layer off like some sort of cupcake-y thing, but then there was a secret other layer. And I think I ate some of the paper wrapper. Yeah. But that's not something that you just get wrong. I mean, like, that was just a mistake that if you hadn't tried to remove the paper period.

I mean, that would be the issue. Yes. No, I know that there was a second wrapper. There was like a second, very thin layer. Yeah. And that's not your fault. And when you worked at the carnival, you would eat the peanuts whole that people would throw at you.

You're making me out to be like a Jason, a Jason Voorhees. But I can't think of, like, I feel like lobster is hard. And then like, I feel like the first time I've eaten like, like, I don't know, like a pate or is that the, how you say it, like a pate or something. I like didn't really know how to do it, but I can't think of anything that I like specifically like, kind of like embarrassed myself with or something. Hey, you know, every time I try to eat a hot dog, it shoots out of the bun. Yes.

I'm squeezing so hard. Yeah. You're looking at babes walking by. Hey, you know, I bet some of our listeners have had some things like this that they can recall. Hit us up with a hashtag food flubs. You had any food flubs in your history? If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email

us at dubboyspodcast at gmail.com to get the dubboys double or weekly bonus episodes. Patreon.com slash Dubois, Neal Campbell, a treat to have you back. So fun. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you. Thank you. Do you have anything you would like to plug at this time? Next episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine that I wrote should air I think November 14th.

Watch every episode. Why not? Which maybe I can't, that might get screwed up by the World Series. Right. Let's just try to say around November 14th, it's got Rob Hubel on it. It's Brooklyn Nine-Nine. But hey, let's hope that there's a World Series, that there's a sweep so this episode can air in its normal time slot.

Don't worry. The Red Sox got it covered, dude. Any sports teams you'd like to plug? God, I guess the Capitals are starting soon. I hope they're good this year. You play hockey yourself sometimes. I played roller hockey until I tore my ACL. That's right.

Oh boy. So check out Neal's former team up in Burbank. We won the championship, no biggie. Well that'll do it for this episode of Doe Boys. Until next time, for the Spoonman, Mike Mitchell, I'm Nick Weicker. Happy eating. See ya. Ferrell Audio.