Doughboys - Firehouse Subs 2 with Brandie Posey

Episode Date: June 4, 2026

Brandie Posey (@brandazzle, Milk Job) joins the 'boys to talk Baltimore eats, The Renaissance Faire, and The Price is Right before a review of Firehouse Subs. Plus, another edition of The Wiger Challenge.Watch this episode at youtube.com/doughboysmediaGet ad-free episodes at patreon.com/doughboysGet Doughboys merch at kinshipgoods.com/doughboysAdvertise on Doughboys via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. Want to watch this episode? Check it out on our YouTube channel by going to YouTube.com slash doughboys media. This episode is brought to you by booking.com. Booking.com offers a wide array of hotels and vacation rentals across the U.S. So you can find exactly what you're booking for? There's something for everyone, Wags, even those who are impossible to please.

Whether you're booking for yourself, your partner, your picky teens, your sleep, light, rise early mom, I know that. or your high-maintenance group chat. I know that as well. It's called the doughboys group chat. You can find exactly what you're booking for. Mitch, you and I travel a lot together. It's true.

Touring. And we found that we have some particular needs for ourselves and for our staff who makes the show possible. That's right. What we're always looking for is a big kitchen. We're always looking for places where you can repair food at the place. We always want nice bathrooms. We want big old bathrooms.

And we want a nice TV so we can watch evening movies. And if we can find our perfect stay on booking.com, anyone can. That's right, Wags. Find exactly what you're booking for. Booking.com, booking. Yeah. Book today on the site or in the app. Do it.

Hey, buddy, this intro was originally used on our June 21st, 2018 episode about this week's chain. Now, I reread it as I do in repeat restaurants, and I liked it. So I'm just using it again with a few edits for brevity. I've never done this before, and if you don't like it, I know you'll let me hear it. Anyway, to the prompter. America's mayor. This was the honorific bestowed upon Rudy Giuliani in the aftermath of the September 11th attacks. As Americans were desperate for leadership and hope after the tragedy, Giuliani became a symbol of national resolve.

But over the years, criticism began to surface regarding the mayor's decision-making in the run-up and aftermath of 9-11. Prior to the attacks, Giuliani overrode concerns from advisors and relocated the city's Office of Emergency Headquarters to the World Trade Center itself. As the 9-11 Commission report noted, this was a costly mistake, given that the terrorist attacks knocked out radio communications, likely resulting in many of the 343 firefighters who perished in the towers, never having received the order to evacuate. And after the attacks, Giuliani reopened Ground Zero prematurely and blocked an order by the EPA that cleanup workers wear respirators, despite a report by the U.S. Geological Survey that the air was

loaded with asbestos and had the toxicity of an hailing drain cleaner. The 9-11 first responders' illness that sickened and killed hundreds of emergency workers was, at minimum, exacerbated by the mayor's negligence. In July 2007, the nation's largest firefighters union released a 13-minute attack ad titled Rudy Giuliani, Urban Legend. The incendiary spot contrasted Giuliani's opportunistic invocation of the attacks to raise his political profile with his demonstrated failure to protect firefighters as mayor. As a retired firefighter Jim Riches, himself the father of a September 11th victim, observed in the video, quote, he's running on 9-11 and it's all a fallacy, end quote. But back in 1994, the first year of Giuliani's first mayoral term, years before the Twin Tower attacks forever

altered his and the nation's trajectories, two firefighter brothers, Robin and Chris Sorensen, collaborated on a new sandwich shop in Jacksonville, Florida. As the sub-siblings' meatloaded firefighter-themed sandwiches attracted a devoted fan base, the company began franchising in earnest in 1999 and grew rapidly nationwide over the course of the yachts. Today, the Sorensen Brothers chain has over 1,000 locations across North America and Puerto Rico, and it pays tribute to its firefighter lineage by donating a portion of its proceeds to charities benefiting America's Bravest. And also today, Rudy Giuliani's already tarnished reputation, is in tatters, and the 9-11 candidate who mismanaged 9-11 has been reduced to a flailing ghoul,

the disbarred TV lawyer for a reality star president, universally reviled by the city he once led, as the myth of America's mayor has gone up in smoke. This week on Doe Boys, we return to Firehouse Subs. Welcome to Doe Boys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Nick Tiger Wager, along with my co-host, Grogu if he was human, the spoon man, Mike Mitchell. It's just because I went off on Grogu recently. It's because you insulted Grogu. I love the show.

It's a 50-year-old baby. Is that like what the deal is? I think that's partly what you're saying. I just don't see how I'm like Grogo. Obviously, they're going to say like a baby dick or something. Yeah, you got a small dick like Grogu. You kind of like... You don't know if Grogu has a small dick.

You could be packing. You could have a hanger, yeah. Yeah, that's dong on Grogu. No one talks about it. Whatever he's got, it's bigger than Mitch's. We can safely assume. Love the show. I don't know if I've ever agreed with a single thing Mitch's said about Star Wars.

but love that he keeps it real. Peace sign. Hashtag no stew, no streams. So some solidarity for twisted metal. Alfredo Solis Fuentes, at Alfredo Film Geek, Rosa BirdFuck.com. How about that? Yeah, how about that?

We, I still have got a food name too, Alfredo. This episode is coming out after Mandalorian has released. It's not out yet, as of this recording. Mandelarian and Grogu. And Grogu has released. I have not seen it, but I've heard some early takes that it's not a good film. We'll see it at some point. I'll have my own assessment.

Do you think he speaks in this one? Do Grogosa's first word? That's interesting. That would be a nice mid-credit scene or something like that. What do you think his first- Yeah. What do you think his first word will be? It might be mama.

Mama. That's so sad. Mama. I think he looks under his robe and says, Bigger than Mitches. So I'm in this world. Yeah, you exist in it. Um, him saying mama is sad because we've never, we've never established his mom.

So now here's his fifth-year-old baby. Well, we got a sequel. Yeah. Also, we don't know his dad. I guess the Mandalorian is his dad. He's not the stepfather. He's his father who stepped up. This is a chosen family.

That's true. All right. That's fair. Mitchie, we have some news here. Weigie. We have some breaking shoes. I just said Waggie. We have some breaking choose here, Mitchie.

How's my guy doing? I'm doing okay. Thank you for asking. Hang it in there. Yeah. You know. We've had some busy weeks, but we know how to... My guy.

We have power through it. I'm your guy? Yeah, you're my guy. I like it. You're my guy. We got a couple busy weeks. You know what's funny is that I am way more... During those busy weeks, I didn't feel groggy at all.

Today, I got the brain fog going pretty bad. It's a weird thing of like, I actually... I usually don't have any energy, but today I've been... I forced myself to go to the gym before work. And I actually have more energy. as a result. It's a weird thing of like, you know, sleeping more makes you sleepier and sleeping too much makes you sleepier and not exercising makes you less energetic. Only two episodes this week, six last week. It's a lot of episodes. Wow, that's a lot. Too many some might

say. The quality may have suffered, listeners. You'll hear. You'll hear them. Also, you guys roll the dice with when you record, too. The 430, I think, can be a real, like, energy dip time. It really is. There's no, there's, we have to now. Yeah. Wags has another job. But you were weighing having a, like a late afternoon caffeine, which I have done on occasion. And I always pay for it. But sometimes it's like, I just need it to get through this, this recorder too, you know. Mitch, we have breaking chews here.

What's that? Let me hear it. The heart attack grill in Vegas is officially closed. I told you this. I know, you told me this. But I'm telling you, I mean, I'm communicating everybody. You broke two pieces of news to me. One, Milk Manor, which I told you about, and two.

I didn't break Milk Manor to you. I said, we learned what Milk Manor was including that as in you. Also, it's Milk Mansion. Milk Mansion, I'm sorry. I said, we learned what Milk Mansion was today. I learned it via you in a group chat we had. You sent it to Gabris, and Gabris said four people had sent it to him already. But it is about a group of, I mean, you can Google Milk Mansion and see for yourself.

People probably already know what this is. I'm just fucking old now to be. touch. It's some... I don't know if that's true. Some milky ladies. Some milky ladies. Some stacked influencers who lean into that.

Maybe not on the work laptop. Yeah, maybe... Maybe do it off. Turn on the VPN. Our work laptops are fine. Yeah, who cares? No one's ever here. I'm moving into Milk Mansion.

Spoon Man, Milk Mansion. Serial milk? I don't know. Heart Attack Grill is closed. On its website, Heart Attack Grill says that it will not be renewing its long-term lease, adding that the soul of Las Vegas has been replaced by corporate greed. This is from our buddy, our buddy Farley Elliott's SFGate article. Basso, who's the owner, told SFGate that the restaurant is already closed permanently.

I'm certainly not trying to knock Las Vegas as a community. I am only telling the honest truth about the tourist sector. It has become as short-sighted of a business model as I could possibly conceive of. I love the people here. I just hate that the major corporations, what the major corporations have done to the economy, Basso added. How about that? This is interesting because I'm like, this guy must be a bad guy.

He seems like a bad guy. And it's like his restaurant has like killed people and is also like, I don't know. Is it fatphobic? It's just weird. It's weird. Yeah. But then also what he's saying, I'm like, well, he's not wrong in some ways. I guess he is a small business owner, but.

A mom and pop. Yeah, it's a mom and pop. But it's just like it's a fucking weird place that maybe it's bad that it exists. I don't know. Did they change the website to just a pee? From now until when it's over. Just a looping flat line. I hope that they did.

I know, I didn't like, there was a, there's a big scale. You could step on a scale out there, and I did not like being on that scale. And if you get on the scale, if you're over a certain threshold, your meal is free. And then they had to raise the threshold because Americans are so fat. We're getting big. We're getting bigger. They're getting bigger. Yeah.

Some maybe fans of the milkmen. mansion might say that's not a bad thing. I agree. I got no problem with it. Ken Bone is the ideal man now in America. Jesus, what a pull. Ken Bone. You forgot Ken Bone? I didn't. I'll never forget Ken Bone. How could we ever forget Ken Bone? His red sweater from the 2016 presidential debates where he was one of the audience questioners and then immediately his Reddit account got docs showing that he had a pregnant woman fetish. So he is into milk lady. He probably is He might be living in milkman to right now. The Hugh Hefter of Milk Mansion.

Kenbone. I remember distinctly one comment he had. It was on R. Pregoes, I believe. And he said, beautiful human submarines. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Beautiful human submarines. Yeah.

Hey, fits the chain today. That's true. What is old, did he help get Trump elected in 2016? Probably, I'm guessing. I don't know. What was his whole thing? Was it like, I'm not sure. He was undecided.

We all celebrated that he was undecided. He was like the new cuddly or Joe the Plummer, I think, right? Oh, yeah, Joe the Plummer is kind of more evil. We should check in on these guys. I think the combination of his, you know, his appearance with the red sweater and then him called, his name being Ken Bone, which is inherently. funny name was enough to put him over the top, regardless what he said. Ken Bone now, I feel like he was kind of beloved, but I feel like he would be hated now

to be like, I'm undecided. You know what I mean? Like, I feel like it. Yeah, sure. Get out the fence, Bone. Yeah, get the fuck off the, yeah. What are you undecided about? Yeah. He might be on Ozambic. I bet he's on Ozembek now. That feels very 2026 in a curse way. Hmm, I'm looking up news on Ken Bone and there hasn't been anything too recently. Two thousand twenty three. His question from 2016, not, not, not even a, Wild question. What steps will your energy policy take to meet our energy needs while at the same time remaining environmentally friendly and minimizing job loss for fossil power plant workers? Wow.

Imagine if we could get that today. I wouldn't go back to the days of bone. Sounds like a fucking liberal cuck if you ask me. All the articles are remember Ken Bone basically. Yeah. Okay. And the internet loved Ken Bone. They loved Ken Bone.

I remember. Man, things were. about to get pretty bad. People didn't realize it right after. I think we got Ken Bone on the show I was working on at midnight. If memory serves, I think we got Ken Bone in on video. I mean, I got Bone, huh? I got Bone, yeah.

I could be wrong. Or it could be, or we tried to get Bone and he was too busy because he's like doing no. I don't remember. One of the two. One of whose agent was. Who got 10% of bone. Yeah. Probably that guy from Heart Attack Grill.

Emma, let's hit him with a drop. But what is Adais? Dictionary.com. describes it as. Seats of honor or a throne. Wow. Ask the dais. Ask the dais.

Ask the dais. Ask the dais. Ask the dais. Ask the dais. We should shout out behind the dais. I'm now realizing your guy's job is too easy. Do you want to do the post production? What the hell?

That's crazy. If I'm going to quit, I think Amelia would just come in with sharp elbows and just like grab power. Yes. Amelia getting a little bossy today Throw my leftovers in the fridge How was I bossy? Careful calling a woman bossy, Mitch. You're going to get

You're going to get canceled. Me, the Ken Bone of the podcast? You're, Amelia is a germaphobe. I'm not that much of a job. I don't think she's a germophobe, but she's more cautious than so. You get very nervous about sharing drinks and stuff.

you do. But it always seems like when you have something coming up more. Yeah, I try to avoid sharing drinks and stuff when, if I know big events are coming up, I don't want to get sick. That makes sense. That to me is reasonable. I mean, I was taught growing up to, like, not share, like, beverages with people or not eat the, like, bites off the same side of food. I'm more casual about that now, partly because I've just been doing this podcast forever. But to me, germaphobe is like you're wiping off, you know, door handles or using hand sanitizer after you. you shake someone's hand and I don't see that from you. I hide it well.

Wait, do you do that? Sometimes, yeah. Wow, okay. Maybe you are a journal phone. I told you. Yeah, wow. Is there an incident that was like the defining moment of this? I've just noticed slowly over time I've gradually have, you know, seeped into maybe, maybe, it's not problematic.

But I could see in five years it becoming a problem. But you're a cat owner too, and cats are kind of, kind of, you know, messy. And cats are actually very clean. Don't you have to screw out of their litter boxes, though? Yeah, but that's every animal shits, though. Yeah, I know. But I mean, it's like, I feel like you maybe would get desensitized to that to some degree. But maybe even compartmentalize it.

I don't know. I don't think there's an animal that doesn't shit, but there may be some organisms that have a different method of, like some, you know, simpler organisms that don't have a different numbers of like an owl. Is that shit? Is that, you know what I mean? Is that like a shit or is that something different? I think that is a shit. It's got a lot of bones.

Yeah, yeah, it's got bony shit. No, they're ones with animals. On a heavy episode. Animals with cloacas, they urinate and defecate out of the same orifice, but they're still shitting. One hole to rule them all. Exactly. That's the cloaca. It's true.

It's true. form. That's ridiculous. Having listened to the entire backlog of Do Boys episodes, I was shocked to learn recently that Mitch used to work for the Simpsons, question mark. Wow. Shout out to Ranch and the Dosecord for the drop idea. Not the ranch, we know. Is that a different ranch?

It must be a different ranch. Cheers. Drop Jeannie, A.K. Latent Tickles in the Dosecord. Wow. Thank you, Drop Jeannie. Drops at birdfuck.com. Mitch. Wags.

Very excited. I'm excited. I'm very excited. A very funny comedian from the lady to lady. podcast. Her new special milk job is available now on YouTube. Randy Posey is here. Hi, Brandy. Hello. We're all milk and bones, which also go together. Absolutely. Milk bones do to go together. Milk and bones go together.

It's a calcium-rich episode. I feel great about it. You got to go to your milk job to make your milk money so you can afford your milk mansion. Are you a milk drinker to this day? No. My dad is. The special is named after my dad's milk habit. Oh, I love that. Yeah, he drinks four gallons a week. Oh my God. It's a lot.

The face that you were making right now. That's a lot of milk. That's a lot of milk. Yeah, and it started during COVID. He just got real into it. It's a weird. Does he feel good? No.

Does he mix, like, chocolate in and anything? Just straight up, whole milk. He's just deeply inflamed drinking milk all day long. Yeah, that's a lot of milk. Yeah, 2%. We were, um, I want, I saw, that's more than a half gallon a day. Yeah.

When math is correct. I saw Jimmy Angel this weekend wise. Jimmy Angel, the 90-year-old teen idol who performs... 91-year-old teen idol was his birthday. He performs at the Smokehouse in Burbank? You ever seen Jimmy Angel? No, but I know of him, but I've never witnessed it live. It should be witnessed by anyone in the L.A. at once.

He's quite a showman. Me and Mike Carlson and Suss went. Yes. It was the 91st birthday. He was rocking. He does three sets. He does three sets. He's running around 91 years old.

He sounds great. but people buy him milk because he doesn't drink alcohol. So people buy him milk during the show. He all had like a cup with milk with ice in it. Like there's like three of him up there where he's playing. And they'll buy him shots of milk too. That's a body good. Truly, that's what I'm thinking.

I'm like, it's going to be something to it. Yeah, I mean, it's maybe like that's a, it's not just the milk he's drinking. It's probably the alcohol he's abstaining from drinking. Well, that's a good point. Long, healthy life. Not enough for me. We know. You love the sauce. Wags likes the sauce. A lot of booze, zero milk.

How do you feel a bit of white Russian? Is that? I don't mind a white Russian. I don't want a white Russian. I think that because it became like a kind of a Big Lebowski association, I kind of like stayed away from it once that permeated the culture everywhere. But I just like. Are Big Loboski fans too annoying? That was, that partly kept me away from Big Loboski for a while. Yeah.

Like I was very late in the game in terms of seeing Big Lobowski, even though I love the cones because I was like, this fan base is driving me fucking crazy. They also like their hate went over to the, and I'm like, the Eagles do have made good songs. And I feel like now it's just such a thing of people like, the Eagles suck. And I'm like, you watch the Big Lobowski when you were 20 and that has stuck in your head. But like the Eagles have made a lot of songs that are good. Also, Don Henley is terrifying. I don't want to be on his bad side. Oh, of course.

Scary man. Yeah. I love, I love Henley. Yeah, it's great. he's great He's good I like a Boys of Summer song It's a great song

It's a banger Your special we should mention Is on You have a label now Burn This Records Yeah I started a comedy label Three years ago Because most comedy

Industry things are really bad And I'm good at spreadsheets So I was like Well fuck it I guess I'll do it And I'm like One of the few Like actual artist friendly

Comedy labels out there I'm trying to work with people all around the country that are like the pillars of their own stand-up scenes because you need to keep a healthy middle class in comedy in order for comedy to still be good at all. So that's like kind of the mission of what we're trying to do with the label. And yeah. Yeah. No, that rocks. And as you know, as a fellow podcaster, it's like part of the, what's great about podcasting is you can kind of circumvent the traditional outlets. You're able to do that less and less as now corporations, much like the ones that drove the Las Vegas's heart attack.

grill out of business are converging on the podcasting industry and cannibalizing that. But still, it's just like there are ways, like, Rouse, like, Patreon that enable you to, again, just bypass all the bullshit. Absolutely. And, like, with stand-em specifically, too, it's like, it is so cursed right now because we just have, large chunks of my industry are just welcoming fascism. Right. So it's, like, it's important for me to, like, take a stand against that and just try to put people that I know We're good people that are funny under one roof to be like, regardless of all the other bullshit, we are good.

Like, come fucking listen to what we're doing. And nobody's famous yet, but they will be if you care about, like, local good comedy. And I think that's, like, who we should be looking at as the industry continues to disappoint you more and more. Burn This Records. You can find us on Instagram. You can find it YouTube.com slash Burn This Records is where my special is because the channel is, like, I'm monetizing that to be able to put out specials and compete with these, like, other things that are, extremely predatory to stand up, too. It's like there's really

these so many spaces that comics will just let themselves we take advantage of because they're like, oh, I got a little feather of my cap. And it's like, no, you should be able to pay your rent with this. Sure, yeah. So I'm trying to, like, lead from that place

because materially it's what we need to do to take care of ourselves. Podcast, the, I'm sorry, the sketch and improv community are pretty high and mighty that the, we don't have any fascists as like the stand-up community. Are you sure?

Yes, there's nothing problematic with any improv or sketch guys. Yes, yes, yes, a very clean slate for over there, for it. They're very, they're very, everything is fine in the improv and the sketch world. Yes, yeah. Yeah.

I was, I was joking. I know you were. Jesus. The, like, it's a, it's a thing that comes up also just generally, any sort of art form that's monetized is artists are not good business people generally. Like it's rare, it's rare to have a mind that can do both. Sammy Hagar can do it, but, you know, he's one of one. It's so, so like you know, someone who's business savvy can very easily take advantage of.

Very much so. Again, just like what you were saying, like, like they're platforming a person and that person's like, okay, this is what happens, even though I'm not realizing them giving you way too much money here. Absolutely. Yeah, though, just the middle class comedy, the thing you're saying, in real class comedy, middle class actors, like a lot of that stuff is. We need to exist. It's, like, important to keep that healthy.

And I mean, like, the thing that, like, with stand-up especially, and I imagine that sketch and improv is a similar thing where it's like, it moved super right because of COVID, because the people that stayed home and, like, weren't touring immediately, they got a little rusty. And then when things opened back up, the industry was like, oh, well, these guys are ready to shoot specials immediately because they were just killing people for two years instead. Yeah. So the whole industry shifted. And then it was like it took a while to ever catch up. And then nobody stands for anything anymore. So you just have to. If you want to, like, exist and feel good about yourself.

You have to just do this kind of stuff. Sure, yeah. I get it. That's rad. Yeah. I'm also funny, I promise. I feel like I've just been just like, I'm a socialist comedian. But it is, yeah, you have to stand for something in 2026.

What class is head gum as far as comedy classes go? Wait, what do you mean? Like the network? We were talking about the middle, yeah, middle class. Yeah, I was just wondering. Hey. Very good. I think putting it in, like, the ranks of podcasts, probably like upper middle class, I'd imagine.

Wow, headgum is. But you're thinking about headgum as a network, like a monolith. That's hard for me, unless you're talking about the headgum, the network side. Yeah. Which I would think of as, you know, its own thing versus, like, the individual podcasts on it. There's some that are bigger, some that are, that are more neat. That's funny. That's upper middle class because it feels like we're in a back alley here.

It does. It feels like you're going to hear like, you know, a cat and a sirens going off. That's what it feels like. when you're in here. I don't smell piss anywhere. You guys are at least middle class. You recorded your special in Portland. I did, yeah.

It's a good day. They'll be a piss smell at someone. You're recording your special in Portland. Where are you on Portland Eats? Because it's a great food town. Yeah. I love it. Every time I go up there, I really look forward to it.

I like because they have the rule where all the bars have to have food in order to have alcohol. So then they're really competing on food, too. It's like, get good sandwiches up. there. It's just served by somebody that's wearing cat ears. It just feels great. Great. There's always a furry with some sort of a rap nearby. Love it. We were just, we were there just recently. We were. Yeah. We didn't even stay there overnight, did we? We just got a hotel for the night. We flew in and drove out. Yeah. Yeah. We got a hotel with the, with the dance. Remember, there was a

it was like teen, but yeah, it was like, all I remember. Why do you think we booked that hotel? It was really strange, us working in the lobby prepping our show and then just like an endless array of teens and like dance moms. Leotards walking by. It was fucking wild. Really, really unsettling.

It was a, you know what? It managed to be very Portland-y even in like the seven hours we were there or eight hours we were there. But yeah, a fun city. That'll happen. Like literally I shot my special. I walked outside and it happened to be the night of there was like a naked bike

ride that just was going past the theater and I was like, all right, Portland. We get it. That's dangerous for some people. No, I know. For me and Grogu, it's fine, I guess. I don't know if you would be doing that. I would be worried about the logistics of riding a bike, having been on the saddle a number of times.

And you usually have some garment you're wearing if you have, you know, a dick and balls, if you will, to kind of keep it where you're not scrunched up on it. You're not sitting on it. And so I could see that, I don't know what you do exactly. So you're not sitting on it. Well, no, it can go in the cavity? Like, you're talking like a drag queen?

We have very different anatomy. No, it's more like you're pulling it up. Like, it's more like you're keeping it out of the, you know, because the saddle is pretty, it's got a lot of pressure on the perennial. Yeah. Oh, for sure. Yeah.

I would hate to be on seat cleanup duty, I guess, after. after the naked bike ride. I guess there's no guy who's really in charge of cleaning up the bike seats. I don't know, maybe someone uses a city bike or something.

Jesus Christ. No, that's a germophobic show. Well, to go back to that, yeah. How do you feel about leaving out a sandwich on the table? I, like, have no issues with it. Like, I'll have a sandwich out all day

and I won't refrigerate. I think when you were refrigerated, it gets a little too congealed. That's my issue with it. Like, it's going to happen no matter what, but you put it in the fridge because you're like, germs.

Yeah, and also there are like flies running around. It was covered up though. They were both covered up. You leave lunch meat out all day though? No, I won't like leave lunch meat out. No, I'll make a, I'll make a sandwich and then put lunch meat away, of course.

But I mean, but there's lunch meat in the sandwich. So if you're leaving the sandwich out, you're leaving the lunch meat out. Yeah, but I don't know, it's in a, it's in a sandwich and it's like, it's usually wrapped up. I think it's... A fly can crawl in. A fly could crawl in. Mine's not a germ thing, but I'd be worried about like, like, it's

about like it going rancid sitting out all day. Rancid, yeah. I mean, I think within six hours you're afraid of it going rancid. I don't think that doesn't, that doesn't scare. But that's me. How do you guys feel? I'm thinking like a party amount of time, like food would be out or like a board for a party amount of time.

And I think that can be okay. I would eat some meat. I would eat meat after a six hour party that was sitting now. I don't think it would bother me. The internet says you should leave deli meats out no longer than two hours. Now, what is, where is the source on that? I'm not that scared of it. This is a Reddit thread.

Okay. I'm not that scared of it. I know you're not scared of it. But would you, like, I would eat a sandwich. Probably around like six or seven hours, I'd be fine with a sandwich being out. I mean, like, covered, of course, but like not in the fridge. I'm fine with that. I'm not doctrinaire about it.

I'm not like crazy about it. But I think if it's going to be like, hey, it's going to be a few hours, I'd probably be on Team Amelia and put it in a fridge. Like, if I make a sandwich to take to work, I'm not taking it just in a back. I'm putting it in like a lunchbox with ice pack. I bring my lunch to work and I put it in the fridge. And sometimes it's a sandwich. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know, it's reasonable thing to do. But, see, it's different to me when it's hot and then it's getting cold. That's fair. Like a cheese steak. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm thinking in elementary or in high school, like school, we didn't have fridges to put our lunches in, right? So those were just. That's true.

That's just like out all day. And I didn't have an ice pack either. No, every day it was had a lunchbox. Basically every day I had a brown bag lunch that I was just like, yeah, it'd be like a fucking turkey sandwich that was just, you know, on a hot day, just in my hot backpack for, like. like four hours with mayo on it probably. With mayo on it, yeah. And it would be like, you know, like five or six hours before you ate it from when it left your house.

But I'd also have tummy eggs all the time. So was it related? I don't know. That's true. Kids puked a lot in elementary school. I think that it was more so that you were drinking a full glass of milk, speaking of. Yeah. I was drinking a lot of milk.

You were drinking a ton of milk. Yeah. And I think that's why you had the tummy egg. Yeah, I mean, like I had milk with, what was your milk consumption growing up? Because I had milk at dinner. So you know, Wags went to. school at Milk Mansion. I drank, you know what, I have milk to me is honestly tied to church in a weird way.

Because like we would go, the deal was we had to go to church, but we had to go to Dunkin' Donuts afterwards. And then I got like two donuts and a glass of milk. So I very much tied like that reward to having to put up with going to church. So it was like, that's kind of mostly when I had it growing up. Chocolate milk was a big. Chocolate milk is, yeah. You know, I haven't had a chocolate milk in forever. We'd nice to have a chocolate milk.

I drink so much chocolate milk as a kid. What denomination were you? Methodist. Methodist, okay. And this is in Baltimore, right? Mm-hmm. Okay. So Baltimore's got Duncan.

I didn't know that. Oh, yeah. Wow. Duncan grown up, it was a big deal. Oh, what that? Also, we did regular milk, but then also my dad and I each had our own bottles of Hershey syrup that we were just chugged raw, unfortunately. I love that.

And I really wish that that's not a thing that I'd been encouraged to do as a child. That rocks. Do people not like Hershey. Hershey syrup, we think of it as a cheap. My question is, did it get worse? Was it better at some point? And now is it worse? I think, I think, yes.

Because I used to love Hershey syrup, of course. I think yes, but also I think just like people's accessibility to better quality chocolate is. That's what happened. So it's a combo. Okay, that's fair. But, of course, it's gotten worse. everything's gotten worse. Yeah.

That's true. Nothing's better. That's, that is, that is very true. But I was, I was slurping a lot of Hershey as a kid, not direct from the bottle, but I was like, you know, I was making chocolate milk at home all the time. That was my way I'd do it. Sometimes we'd have quick, but mostly it was Hershey syrup. And then, you know, I'd get some vanilla ice cream. You know, I'm a big vanilla fan, and I'd just, I'd just Peter North some Hershey syrup on top of it.

And that was like a common dessert for me. Absolutely. Did you guys ever do a raisin brand, but then put like a cup of sugar on top of it? of it. Oh, yeah, yeah. Let's make the sludge. I was always adding sugar to cereal. Corn flakes, the corn flakes were before, I mean, I don't know if there's before

frostaflakes. I sound old as fuck. But when, like, at my grandma's house would be corn flakes and then just pouring the sugar onto the corn flakes. And it was damn, damn good. The sludge. Yeah, the sludge. That white sludge you could make.

Right. The precious juice. Wags, heart of the matter and end of the innocence. I like, those are my two favorite. Oh, yeah. And in the innocence in a birthday boy's sketch. Why? It's true.

It's in a... Ham hat. Ham hat, yeah. And I wonder if that was my love of that song was the reason it's in there. I have a feeling. It drove it. It corresponds with your character's appearance.

And also the other song in that is a song that I play on my birthday. Oh, that's right. Yeah. Run it on empty. Run it on empty. Anyways. Mitch listens to running on empty by himself.

About every birthday. At the beginning or the end of the birthday, is that, like, emotionally... When it turns midnight, if I am, if I'm like, I'll listen to it usually. Okay. It's nice.

In the dark? Or a candle? Sometimes in the dark. Sometimes it's just sitting there. I'll just kind of sit and reflect. Do you want that played at your funeral or like your mom, do you want to hear Pit Bulls' timber? It's the real thing. Mitch's mom wants timber to play her.

He says she wants Pit Bulls tip. I don't think we're going to allow it. Why not? It's her wish. It is her wish. All right, maybe we'll play it at some point. Not for a very long time. You're not invited to either.

Yeah. I don't need to worry about it. It's not going to happen anytime soon. It seems like you know a lot. Jesus Christ. It seems like you know something's up, but that's all I'm saying. I love your mom. She's a wonderful person.

Her and I are both threatened and nervous right now. I'm not threatening you. I would ever threaten Mrs. Mitchell. I know you want to threaten. You guys get along great times together. You guys get along gray. Yeah, we do. If she hears it, does she like think,

is she like excited about the idea of her funeral? Or like, what's her reaction to the story? to the song. She's being funny, but she's like, I want this play it. And we're like, no, you can't have pit bull. I don't want to hear pit bull. If that's her real wish, we'll get it out of her at some point. But I don't know if it's a real fucking wish, but it might be.

It might be her wish. I think you should play it just in case. Just have it on cue. It's something we don't got to, I don't want to think about it anytime soon. Yes. So you're from Baltimore as we, as we discussed. Baltimore, a good food city. Really good food.

What are your bites that make you think of home? I mean, the first solid food I ever had was blue crab. Wow. Wow. Yeah, that's like kind of a Maryland tradition. Like, really is like, because crab, have you guys ever been to a crab feast? I have, yeah. I don't know if I ever been to a crab.

Have you ever been to a one time? We took a trip to Baltimore. We were in D.C., but we spent some time in Baltimore when I was a, boy, when I was a teenager, my brother was already out of the house. And so it was me, my parents and me and my only time. child phase. And yeah, I remember going to one of those. And it was just like, I will say first off, blue crab is great. The degree of difficulty if you're a blue crab noob is very high. Oh, yeah, absolutely. It is like it's earned for sure. But it's like that is like a right of like childhood of there. It's like your first memories as like your parents picking crab and like giving you a little piece of it and stuff. I love, I love blue crab. We have pit beef, which is like, I don't know, charcoal beef that's sliced real thin with a bunch of horseradish on like. Kaiser rolls.

I'm going to serve pit beef at my funeral. It sounds like delicious. I love a pit beef. I love crab cake. I mean, everything crab related, I'm very into. We also have this thing, Ocean City, Maryland has a thing called the wrapper, and it is, like, a stuffed pretzel that comes with, like, chicken wrapped in pepperoni and cheddar inside of it. Oh. And it is, like, so good.

It's my favorite, one of my favorite things in the entire world. Wait, it comes with chicken, or it's stuffed inside of it? So chicken and pepperon. and cheese are all stuffed inside. That's wild. What a combo. It's called the kick and chicken. You make room for it.

I love it. By the way, it seems like Baltimore is not, like Boston and New York City and even Philadelphia all have just been oversaturated with all of those cities a little too much. And I'm from Boston. And I'm saying this. It's just the truth. Baltimore is an under. Baltimore is still, you know, you got the wire, I guess. You got the Ravens.

the Ravens. You got the W. But he hasn't been, it hasn't been, there hasn't been like too much. They haven't like, we haven't been like oversaturated with Baltimore in the same way. No, I think the accent is difficult, which makes it hard for people. But I will say we have a, speaking of the Ravens, we have an Edgar Allan Poe impersonator every year in Edgar Allan Poe's birthday, he goes to his grave and drinks a conneck shot. And you can see. And it's been multiple people in the same family of continuing this tradition.

It's amazing. The Ou-G board is from Maryland. Wow. There's a Ouija board museum. It's pretty awesome. There's a 7-E-E-E-Bore with a giant Ouija board on the wall in Baltimore. That's pretty sick. What's the Ouija board museum consists of?

Just a bunch of old Ouijis. Wow. Deeply haunted. Were you ever, like, does that mean there's more of like a Ouija culture in Baltimore? Was that a thing in childhood or as a teenager? I've never, I don't mess with those. You don't mess with them. No, no, no.

I have too many Catholics in my family, I think, to really mess the Ouija board. I saw Hocum last night. What did you think of Hocum? I really liked Hocom. I loved it. People say I hate stuff. I loved Hocom. You know what I saw?

I saw sheep detectives. I loved it. Your favorite writer? My letterbox review was like, I commend everyone involved in this delightful film except for Craig Mason. I have no respect for as a man. But I do think it's just a, Kyle Balda directed it who directed Minions. Just a great illumination director moving into live action. It's just absolutely charming.

It's really great. I don't really think about sheep detectives. It's a live-action movie? Yes, it's Hugh Jackman is being detected by she. Hugh Jackman is a shepherd. He's murdered very early on, like within the first 10 to 15 minutes of the movie. And then the rest of the movie is the sheep trying to aid a human police officer in solving the crime. Is this like if Babe was taken, kind of? It's kind of like if Babe was taken. Yeah. Okay, great. Awesome. I love it. Really into that. Great. how it was sold.

No, I liked it. Are you a movie person? Yeah, I am, but I go through, I go through phases sometimes. Yeah. I, like, I just won't pay attention to what's coming out. And I've been too focused on Milk Job on YouTube to really be seeing anything with a narrative of any kind right now. You get in those work phases because I love movies and I, you know, we try to see movies every week to go to the movie theater. But you get in work phases, I was just like, Jesus Christ, six weeks has gone by.

I haven't seen shit. I mean watching anything at home. And then you get so far behind. I saw two movies this weekend. That's always like a two movie weekend. That's always nice. I'm going to try to hit a couple more this week. We'll see what happens.

Yeah. It feels like we're getting into the, there's some fun stuff coming. There's some fun stuff coming. Yeah, we were a little bit of a slump, I think, for a minute. I've rewatched Twin Peaks Firewalk with me this week. I've actually never seen that because I never finished season two of Twin Pea. I've watched like almost all of season two and I didn't finish it.

So I haven't, I have not watched Firewall. Oh, wait. Yeah, that's the movie. Yeah, yeah. So I've never, I never watched it. I think, you know what happens in the... I don't know if I know, actually. I gotta find out.

I mean, it's great. We're doing a rewatch on Lady Lady's Patreon because Babs has never seen it. We're doing like... Twin Peaks, the show itself? Well, just one episode, like the first season. We just started a new thing where we're watching one season of a show that one of us hasn't seen. And I had to watch Dawson's Creek, unfortunately.

Oh, man. Now I'm making Babbs watch Twin Peaks so I can have a break. This is happening to me with Twin Peaks and Deadwood, two shows. And I love both of them, but Deadwood, how many seasons? Is there three seasons? Three seasons. There's three seasons, like with Deadwood and with, like, I watch them for so long and then I just will fall off for a while.

And I'm like, I've got to start it again. And then I'll restart it and then I'll just watch the first season again and then fall off again. Maybe I just should pick up the second season and watch, watch like a recap of the first season or something like that. I go through a show like that, just watch the entire thing. And then I won't watch anything narrative for like four months. But I really like, I'll watch the same five episodes of Forged and Fire over and over again. I'm very into a knife-making reality show. Or have you guys seen Homestead Rescue?

That's the only other reality show I watch. Wait, what is that? That's on HBO. And it is like Bar Rescue except with Homesteads. Love that. And it's a family from Alaska that's very good at homesteading going out to find people who are like, slow-motion family annihilators is how it feels to me. where I'm like, why the hell did you move your family to the middle of the woods with no survival skills whatsoever?

And it's amazing because you feel like you are like learning something about how you could live off grid, but then also you are judging people that made so many bad decisions. It's amazing. As someone who's seen a lot of bar rescue, I'm mapping bar rescue onto homesteads and just imagining someone walking into a poorly run homesteader. We're shutting this whole place down. That's exactly what is happening. That's great. It's amazing. And the family that fixes them is from Alaska,

and they're crazy in their own right, and it's awesome. Your wife left you because you don't know how to grow crops. So many of these people just move the middle of woods and they haven't had a toilet for four years. Wow. And then this family shows up, and then they yell at them for not having a toilet. It's 1 p.m. in a podcast studio.

Where is everyone? I love Taferred to do podcast rescue for headgum. Podcast rescue is good. He changes the name to, like, potty. place. And then we close in like three months. It always happens. Taffer comes into a business, completely fucks it

up, drives away all the little old old regulars. We review fancy hats. No one cares about food anymore. You review hats. Nice hats is the thing to review. So I give this fedora five brims. Mitch, what do you think?

Our Patreon goes down to zero. There's some, we have some, there's some, there's got to be a few fat hat guys on the, you know that there's, there's a few. There's some fat hack guys out there. There's some fat hat guys out there. There's, there's, those bin diagrams overlap. Have you ever been in a bar rescue bar and just felt that it was before you had it confirmed? Yeah, I've been in a couple. I mean, there's, there's some in L.A. Yeah. So there's, I mean, Dipples was rescued and Dipples, I think is closed now, perma close. But the, there's also a sports bar in North Hall. Hollywood or was it Burbank. There's one near our, when we were like several podcasts. Oh, right. Yes. We were right near a Bar Rescue Bar.

And it was like a dive bar. It was a dive bar. And like people liked it as the dive bar. We went in there, didn't we? Yes. And it's like one of those things were. Was there an NBA game playing at that point? There was something.

Why were we there? I think we were there to watch a sporting event. That would make sense. I know why we were there. Because we used to record up there. Yeah, we recorded right by there. That's what it was. Was it champs?

I think it was champs. Yeah. Champs? Yeah. Champs sports pub. That sounds right. Yeah. That feels good.

Can we look up Champs on it? Because there's a bar rescue site that says like kind of how everything happens. I love it because the bar rescue recap you go through and just place after place. It's just like, this place closed. It places out of business. Yeah. It doesn't work at all. This place had a porno shot in it, which is really one of them.

I can't believe a blue drink didn't fix this. Cajun Nightmare is similar thing. Like it's sad. It just, it doesn't work. I mean, it's a ruthless business. Anyways. Wait, one thing that Baltimore makes me think of is, is, it was kind of the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the nexus of, of diner culture in America. Like, like, wait, do you have any diners you remember from Baltimore? Yeah. So this is a place called the Honeybee Diner, Glenbury, Maryland. It is still to this day, my favorite diner ever. Um, because the most griseled old waitresses of all time. And me and my high school friends, because also in high school, it's like, you're looking for third places. And diners are kind of the thing that you can go to and be in overnight. So we would go, we would spend, we would spend New Year's at Honeybee, and we would just go. And I remember when you were trying to bring a Martinelli's for the waitresses.

And they're like, you can't drink that in here. We're like, it's for you, though. And they were like, we don't want that. Okay. I just remember silently watching the countdown on the television. And then I was like, oh, I think when you're an adult, you don't care about New Year's. Yeah. It was a fun lesson to learn early on.

That rocks. You're usually in bed before the clock hits zero, right? These days, yeah. I'm not someone who bothers to stay up anymore. I mean, I'm just on, like, I'm just such a used to my old man's sleep schedule. But the one thing I think of, because I'm thinking specifically the movie diner, where they have fries with gravy on them. Oh, yeah.

That's a Baltimore thing. It is. Yeah, yeah, I feel like you see a lot of gravy on stuff. Well, there's also, like, not biscuits and gravy, but there's, like, chip beef and gravy. Do you guys know what that is? Yeah, I've heard of chip beef and gravy. Yeah, that feels very. very growing up to be. Also, Scrapple is a big deal there.

Oh, Scrapple. Scrapple, which I associate with Pennsylvania, but it's part of Baltimore. It bleeds down on into it. Yeah, I love Scrapple. Scrapple everything but the oink. I've never had it. It's really good. You need to be crispy, I think, personally. Some people, it's gray otherwise, so it should be crispy. What is the texture like of Scrapple? It's real mushy in the middle. It's like, you know, you know how like you get like a sausage patty

sometimes. It's like if that was like a little looser kind of. Sounds delicious. Sounds good to me. Yeah, yeah, a real loose sausage. Just adding. Baltimore and Pittsburgh, I feel like the two East Coast cities

that are, that haven't, we haven't been just completely Pittsburgh is great too. Yeah. Yeah, they're under, also Baltimore has, we have benches that say Baltimore, greatest city in the world. And they make me laugh every time I see them. I love it. That is fun. Yeah.

We never, have we ever done a show in Baltimore itself? I don't think so. No, I think we've done a DC a number of times, and that's kind of works for the greater Baltimore area. But, yeah, we get ourselves in Baltimore proper. It's really, really fun. It's a great city.

It's charming. I find that you're right on the water. It smells bad most of the time. But it's just like, it's really great. Everyone's just like descended from like an old waterman of some kind. And it's just got a lot of charm too. Charmed city. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, nothing. It's all, we're all the same now. What do you mean? Like localism is gone. It's gone. Oh, you think everything's gotten pretty homogenous? It kind of has. Baltimore has not because we've also like don't have like a, it's a very poor city still.

Yeah. So it's like it's never had like an industry come in with a ton of money and kind of change it. Yeah, Boston has changed. They said the Boston accent is, it's going away. Is it really? There's a lot of articles about how the Boston accent is just, I mean, I mean, you'll go and you'll hear a lot of people with it, of course. People take classes in Boston to train it away. Really?

Yeah, because people think it makes them sound unintelligent, so it's harder to get a job. So they're like, we'll take a class to learn to get rid of it. I don't know. I've never thought of Mitch is unintelligent. Yeah. Oh, look, you've done doing that fucking work, you fucking asshole. Are you happy?

Are you happy? Are you happy? Are you happy you've destroyed the Boston accent? Yeah, I'm happy. Yeah, you know what? I'm glad. No, I, like, I've never, when I, like, we were hanging out with your Quincy crew, I'm like, I'm like, I'm hearing the Boston accents left and right.

I'm hearing you code switch a little bit without even knowing it. I'm not code switching. You slide back into it. You slide back into it. Even talking to your mom and Courtney, your sister. Okay, yeah. Well, maybe it comes back out of me. Yeah.

And by the way, they all have Boston accents and they think you're fucking stupid. There it is. So there you go. Okay, you perform, you're telling us before recorded that you, you've been doing stand-up for a long time. You perform stand-up at the Warp Tour. Yes. What is that like?

It's a real exercise in ego death. Because you will just be performing and doing really well for like 50 people. And then like Sublime will just start playing. And you just watch 50 people to go, sorry. And you're like, no, fair. I would also go leave right now if I wasn't contractually obligated to be here. So yeah, it's fun. They initially wanted us to do like much longer sets.

And I kind of was able to talk them down and be like, Nobody wants to watch us for half an hour. No one wants, no, we don't want to do half an hour. So it's like, it's very fun. And like, I have a merch booth all day, which is a blast, which I've never actually gotten to have and just like talk to people and bullshit with them all day and stuff. So it's also like comedy is the flea on the dog's back that is music, I always feel like. So anytime that you can just be around it, you're like, oh, no one actually cares about us.

It feels nice to not have the responsibility of this on my shoulders. We did one, remember with that show we did in San Francisco where we did, where we, it was like a music show, where we were on the stage. Or it was like a comedy festival. It was like a comedy festival, but it was mostly a music show. But there were also like, our stage, we did a bit, we did a thing with Paul Shear and then we and then Gabris was hosting it. And then we also judged a weed contest afterwards. That's right. Was it a bong contest?

Oh, maybe it was a bong making contest. Yeah. I can't believe I wasn't there for this. That's what I was going to say. I can't believe Emma missed this. Was this before your time? No, I actually kind of remember you guys being there and someone on the tech team called me

about recording the show and I was like at a brewery here. For some reason I wasn't there. I don't remember why, but. I think because it was a one-off. Sounds like I should have been. We absolutely should have traveled you. No, no, no.

We probably should have been. Oh, right. Yeah, no, not for the doughboy side. Yeah, you should have been there for you. Were they like, they were given a bong to decorate or were they like crafting something? I think they were building something. I think they showed us bongs that they made and were like, this one's good. I mean, it was me and Wigar judging it, which is the wrong people to fucking judge it too.

Yeah. But I do. On craftsmanship? Creativity. It did. I felt like that thing where batteries should have been thrown at us. So that's like that's the one time where we're on a. Colcabana's wanted us to do.

gathering of the juggalo's, which does feel like we would probably get shit thrown out of us. That feels like, and I'm curious at a stand-up's perspective, like that feels like a bridge too far. Like, I think it would be, it's fun in theory, but then I think you're actually there and then you're just like being pelted. I heard, know somebody that opened for Harlow Williams at the gathering, and he was not a famous person. And he had circular sawblades thrown at him on stage. Oh my God. So he got off the stage about 30 seconds later and was like, you're going to have to pay me. me, but I'm not going back up there.

Jesus Christ. ICP is playing Warped Tour Orlando, so I am going to see them, which I've never seen them live before. I'm very excited. Circular saw blades. Circular saw blades. Yeah. Just a crime.

Yeah, I guess that is just a full-on crime. Jesus. Yeah, because I remember before that I was like, I would ironically go to the gathering. That could be fun. And then I was like, oh, I don't think it's actually, I don't think that's actually fun. Yeah. It's one thing to have, like, you know, snowballs and, like, bottle rocket shot at you.

But Jesus Christ, I'm going to get actually very badly wounded. Yeah, exactly. Wow. Like to keep all my digits intact at a gig. Yeah, I'm not that committed. It might be easy to throw, too. It feels like it's like a, it feels like you could really get somebody with one of those things. Yeah, I think you could.

Yeah. It's like a shuriken. Yeah, it is like a shiriken. I agree. Man, remember what ninja stars used to be like all the rage? What about ninja stars? Bring back ninja stars. And that thing that's Zina had too, right?

Yeah. That would be sick. What happened to thrown weapons? We need a throne weapon resurgence. I don't know if we need. throwing weapons back. I'm not saying like in our in like reality.

We have plenty of weapons in reality. I'm saying like 80s and 90s there was a big ninja thing. There's a big ninja thing. The ninjas have been around for a very long time. But I also think shurikins became bigger than ninjas themselves

and then you just see like throwing stars and they're fucking awesome. I mean the turtles brought along a lot of this. The turtles brought along a lot of it but then also like an eraser shorts and eggers a fucking knife he throws. Yeah. Projectile weapons like that?

Yeah. Well projectile weapons. and I think is a larger thing that encompasses guns and stuff. And specifically thrown weapons. All right.

Thrown weapons. Yeah. I feel like there was a point when it's like guns, guns came in and it became real lazy, right? Because before it was like all the yeah, the throwing stuff

was like kind of fun and then you're like, then you started fetishizing the guns and our action movies a little bit more. We have the, we have axe throwing is a thing now. Like people go to axe throwing bars so it feels like let's get,

let's get some fucking throwing back into our movies and TV shows. Yeah, they should do more throwing. It's fun. Throwing is fun. A spear like. Fum! I like to get a sigh.

Can you throw a sigh? I think you can throw a sigh. I think it's more likely to be handheld, but you could do one of those. That would be great. You guys see the No Mortal Kombat, my man. I know. I can't believe I've seen it yet.

If you guys went to the Renaissance Fair with us last week, because we've done some max throwing, some knife throwing, some spear throwing. They had the little stars. That's awesome. Yo, shout out to Maryland's Renaissance Festival in Crownsville, one of the best ones in the country. I've heard from several Renaissance performers.

It's the top tier one to perform at it. Really? I'm really was dressed up as a jester, I believe. Yes, I was. Oh, cool. He rocked. We got a blast. It was me, Emma, Mike, and Gapris.

We threw a lot of things. We threw spears, knives, and axes. We didn't do the stars, I guess. We didn't do stars. Oh, we had a lot. I didn't join you guys, but then when I saw how long you were there, I was like, I am thrilled. I didn't go. You were there for like nine hours.

We were there at noon and we left at six. We were there for six hours. Six hours. We had a blast. We had a blast. It looked fun. It looks fun. It's our behind the scenes team and then also Gabris, our most frequent guest.

It was basically the fun version of dough boys. Just minus me and Mitch. Sulking and complaining. It looks fun as hell. It was a blast. It was really fun. I'm not even like, Renaissance fair is not my like schick, not my thing. I'd never been to one, didn't know what to expect.

A thousand percent would go back. I had so much. I've been to one before. Yeah. Everybody was there to have a good time. I want to get chastised by that lady as I drink beer. She would like pour the drink down your throat and be like, yeah, you. Say fresh things.

Yeah, you take that. Oh, you're doing really good. It was wild. That is way too up my alley. It was such a weird mixture of that. And then like families with their kids. Yeah. Oh, totally.

There's also like a look that you only see at a Renaissance festival. It's like a man who has seen too many boobs. It was like the end of the day because it's just like, All the push-ups. Everybody's in their boobs out. Yeah, you just, there's a look at a man's way. He's a smile curse. He just is like,

Yeah. He's like, I didn't know you could see to the end. It's hilarious. I love it. Well, back home to Milk Mansion. Yeah. That is, so like, she force feeds you and is mean to you at one. Yes.

It's not even mean. It's more like fresh. It's like a combo of like being mean, but also like praising you at the same time. Yes. Okay. I don't think you'll ever go to a Renaissance Fair. What do you think of that? I would say, like, kill the praise.

You maybe could ask for that. I was going to say, now you might go to Renaissance Fair after hearing about how you can get chast-eye by the late. And fucking ninja stars, apparently, you know, at all. But you're a man who goes to bed before New Year's. But if we're talking about an afternoon activity. The Renaissance Fair ends at 7 p.m. It closes at 7 p.m. Those are Wagger hours.

Yeah, yeah. Do you hear Natalie? Do you hear blowing the horn in the other room on New Year's Eve as you're asleep? Is it like that sort of situation

or is it you're both in bed? We'll usually go to bed around the same time, yeah. Okay. Fair enough. But she would absolutely have a party without me.

You're in the other room watching fucking sheep detective. Wait, you've been to the Baltimore Renaissance Fair? Oh, yeah. growing up every year. It's also, it's so popular now

that you, like, cannot get tickets day of. Like, when the tickets go on sale, the entire summer sells out, like, in, like, the first day. Do you have a favorite thing

that you look forward to the Renfair? Yes. So my favorite performer of all time, actually, is a Renaissance performer at the Baltimore,

at this one. He is the juggling chainsaw comedian, and this is a man that he juggles things with a chainsaw on a unicycle, but he has told the exact same act my entire life and it gets more and more

dead-eyed every single year and it's amazing watching him just go through the motions but just be chucking this chainsaw in the air you can feel the divorce on his body at this point it's so funny and then like maybe 10 years ago

he asked people to throw things up on stage to juggle with his chainsaw and this guy threw up a copy a big on DVD and I was like why the fuck is big here who brought big on DVD to the Renfest why why is it happening Why is it here?

It was amazing. Yeah, that guy is my favorite dude. I've watched him like every single summer that I'm home for Renfair. Yeah. That's awesome. Yeah, it rules. There used to be an elephant back when we didn't realize how bad that was. But it's not there anymore.

Yes, yeah. I know. Look, things used to be good. We used to be able to ride the elephants around. We were having a blast. Do they, do they, are they don't do it? There's like no more show elephants, are there? or no?

I mean, I think there's maybe some circuses that do it but it's become much more tab. You can't ride an elephant anymore basically is kind of what it is. Probably some states where you can. In other countries you can. Sure, sure, sure.

I don't think in like a circus sense, no. Maybe in Missouri. Did you ride on a, I did as a child I wrote an elephant. A lot of people have been on the back of an elephant. I've never been on an elephant. Or a camel. I have.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they don't do it anymore. Yeah. I would, I would, it's weird. Like, I get the appeal of it, absolutely.

If I was a kid and had the opportunity to get on the back of an elephant, I'd be a little scared, but I would want to do it. Of course. It's good. It's a good thing that it's gone. Yeah, yeah. I'm really good. That's funny, the Renfair had an elephant.

I guess that fits, right? I think if you get one, you use it. Sure. We've got an elephant. Yeah. I learned you could do, like, whatever the fuck you wanted to rent fare. People, like, have come dressed up as, like, stormtroopers, and they act like they're from the future, from a different timeline.

There was a dude dressed up as Shrek. Like, you can literally do whatever you want. Okay. It's really fun to watch a Jack Sparrow see another Jack Sparrow. Yes, there was a Jack Sparrow. It's always great. Yeah. They're really fun because they're usually getting kicked out of something at the Renfair

and then running into each other that way. The Shrek, I guess Shrek is Shrek from medieval times? I mean, the Shrek world is medieval adjacent, I guess. Okay, that's fair. People love Shrek. People do love Shrek. Remember they cleaned up, they, they, Pirates of the Carbara. and went woke, as we know.

But then they added in Johnny Depp at the end. What a fucking misfire, it feels like. Is it still in there? I think Depp's still in there, yeah. Depp is still in there? I think Jack Sparrow is still a presence. It's a good animatronic. It is a good animatronic.

It is a good animatron. I agree. They just, they changed everything else, and then they put, it feels like you can take him out and put all the other stuff back and it would be just as fine. They updated some of his, of his VO, so he's like, she lied on the witness stand. I found it turd in me,

You have a unique living situation here in L.A., which is that you live in a mobile home community. I do, yeah. I love it. You've lived there for a while now. I have, yeah. So I've been there for 12 years now. It's funny because it's in a very cool neighborhood in the city.

I love it quite a bit. It's a cool neighborhood. Yeah, yeah. It's really fun. And my very first stand-up tour, everyone went on, I was gone for six weeks. And when I was gone, the apartment on either. side of me got sprayed for cockroaches. So I came back to a horrible infestation after my first triumphant tour around the country. And I was like, so they left that place and they came over here.

Straight into my place. And I was like, you're never sharing walls again. You need to figure something out. And I just started driving around L.A. and I found this trailer park the day that my trailer got put up on the market. It was just like meant for me. It was amazing. And I called. I wrote like a nice letter. I was able to like, I bought my house in Los Angeles for $45,000. Amazing. No big deal. Yeah, it's a two bed, two bath. I pay a lot rent, but it's like incredibly cheap.

And we have like 32 houses in our park. Wow. It's a lot of old, like a lot of old people, then also young people. And we're all friends with each other. And we have like potlucks a couple times a year. And we have like Halloween decorating contests and stuff. And it's really awesome. And one of my favorite things about Los Angeles.

It's such a cool. It seems like a really cool small community. Yeah, it sounds good as hell. It really rules. And, like, I painted my house. My house is, like, bright purple with, like, I have this Ombray wall in the front of it, and I have a 12-foot skeleton next to it. And it's just like, I just have a silly little home.

And I love it so much. And it just makes me happy every time I'm there. Eminem did damage to the trailer, to the trailer living. It's true. When he was, you know, when he's speaking against his mom and her living there, right? He did some bad, irreparable damage. We've had some trailer part moments. Shame on you, Eminem, is all I'm trying to say.

We have had some trailer park moments. Like, don't worry. I've, I have several neighbors that have died of just like, you know, old age or whatever. But like when I first moved in, our first lot manager was on hospice. She died three days after signing our rental agreement. Oh, my God. Her son took over that place. He was a blackout drunk diabetic with a cotton candy machine.

So he killed himself with a cotton candy like six months later. Jesus. And I was like. The way we're going to go. I was like, damn, trailer park. Okay. getting crazy in here. And then we had a hoarder that she passed away of old age. She used to buy me

a five gallon jug of of peanut butter every year for Christmas because she said that was her secret to old age. So I got that from her. It feels like peanut butter is good for the year. Yeah. Yeah. Every mental issue I have, you're putting in different trailers right now. Sounds like.

She was my next to her neighbor directly and she died right before COVID. She was like 83. And so early COVID, we got to watch a bunch of people come in and just clean out a horde and it was honestly the best entertainment I ever could have asked for because like me and my roommate at the time we kept kind of being like, what did you find? Because see the guys kind of get together and like huddle up and be like, what did you find out

there? And like I have a rusty machete that they pulled out of her house. That's pretty fun. Oh my God. Yeah. Yeah. I have an old photo album with like her family. She didn't have any next of kin.

So it's like they were just going to chuck this photo album. And I was like, I'll take it. I hate saying like old photos thrown away. Yeah, sure. You know, so just have this my old neighbor Raina's photo album or. family. That's beautiful. Yeah.

What is, is there's like a real sense of community there. Like, like, do you guys have like a bond? Like, do you have like like, like cookouts or bonfires or anything like that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We do. We there's, well, the park manager now, her and her husband have a band.

It's very tim and Eric energy. Sure. During lockdown, they were the only live music that I saw for two years. Oh, man. And they like to throw a little concert. So just the two of them. And then they will live stream on Facebook, but then only play to the, Facebook. It's as if you are not there at all watching it happen. It's amazing.

So they play and they usually get like pizza and like sometimes we'll grill out and stuff. And it's just a very fun little little community. We had this guy named Barry that passed away a few years ago. He was an older guy. And his family came to clear out his trailer. And we just were all like telling stories about Barry and they were like, oh, yeah, I didn't know anything about him. And I was like, no, Barry was like my homie. Barry told me one time that I needed to be careful because if I kept losing weight, I would never be a Layton Bryant model. And I was like, what a specific compliment, Barry.

Thank you for that. Rest in power. Rest in power, Barry. It's always fun when, well, rest in peace to Barry, but it is always fun when you hear things about, one, you hear you're too big. And then you hear all this stuff about how you should lose weight or if you lose too much weight,

fucking bullshit. You can't do anything right. Don't make anyone happy. Can't make anyone happy, Mom. Yeah. He tried to give me a gun too, but he's just going to give it to me one day, and I was like, I don't know if I can just take it, Barry, but. He tried to give you a gun. Yeah. Wow. Yeah.

Like for your, like, you should have one of these because you're, you know, that's wild. He's like, I care about you. We want to make sure you have protection in the house. And I was like, I appreciate it. I do have a dog. But it's good to know that there's just loose guns, two trailers down. I mean, it is in some sense, a thoughtful gesture. No, he was like very, he was like from Detroit. Like, he was just a retired Marine.

He was just like a sweetheart guy. Yeah, yeah. You and Mitch have something in common, which is that you both worked on Price's right many, many years ago. That's right. Hell yeah. I was there for the Barker turnover. I don't know.

Were you there like a year after that, basically? A year after that, yeah. Okay, yeah. And who was the host of this era? Drew Carey. Did it go right into carry? Yeah. I think it did.

Wow. Yeah. Yeah. There was no. There was, it was, there was like a thing where they were like, I think they maybe had a couple people come in to test. I was in, I told you that I did a test. You've just heard this before. I did a test episode.

I spun the wheel. And I was like, it's going to hit a dollar. And then it just stopped. And the crew guy behind it was like, I stopped. I was like, what the fuck? But, but, but, but I was a page there at the time. And for, um, uh, um, uh, Comedy hero Bill Marr.

I was also a page for Bill Mar. Love that. I am. I never saw any verse handkerchiefs, but he masturbates into a handkerchief before every show. Allegedly. Allegedly. And it's silk. And it's silk.

Is that a Patreon tier that he has with the club random going on? I don't have merch on Patreon, but you know, it's like. But I was in him and Woody doing it before the show. Wait, was that? Him and Woody Allen doing it before the show. Never saw Woody there. I saw Ben Affleck was there one night when I was When I was there.

That's fun. Yeah. It was a bunch of random people. It was good. I was a PA for the makeup department. And the lady you ran it was like a real, real interesting lady. And she had like two sons that would come to taping sometimes. And she had, they had both grown their hair out very long.

And they had like these long curls. And she would just like stare at the camera to make sure everyone's makeup was good while she brushed one of her sons next to her. and I just thought it was deeply mentally ill. That's intense. Yeah. It was a real fun early Hollywood site. Yeah. I'm surprised I've never gotten this treatment in my life, but that is very, that is, I mean, I love it.

Yeah, just brushing a son next to her. Here's a question. This is a right question that I don't know if I've ever asked you, Mitch, but since we're kind of bridging two different generations of the show, what was the food situation like there? Like, was there craft services? I'll tell you this. Yeah. No, not for me, because I was a CBS page and I was just leading people in, but backstage probably. But this is just the old school Hollywood thing, but there was the CBS cafeteria felt like you were on a real working lot.

It was like you were in there and I'd like see Bob Barker sometimes like, oh sorry, shuffling through there and stuff like that. You would see like Days of Our Lives actors. It felt very much like Hollywood is happening and now that whole, I think they sold that entire studio. Didn't they like a, yeah, that's gone. I think a billionaire owns it or something. thing now. That's cool. Like I would walk around and some guy would be like, hey, nice jacket.

I was like, it's Billy Ray Cyrus telling me my page jacket is nice. It did feel, it felt like kind of Hollywoody and it felt that. It was like a, it felt like that, like when that was kind of dying or you're like, oh, I'm seeing all these sorts of kind of different Hollywood personalities or whatever. Yeah, you're like clocking in. It felt like you're like, all right, now it's lunchtime. We're working. It felt, felt good.

Yeah. And I thought, I thought I liked the cafeteria at CBS. a TV city. That was what it was. I miss cafeterias. Yeah? There's one of my current work, and it's fine.

I don't know that. You got a, yeah. I'm not trying to doxy. You got a Picot-Mas. We do have a Pugino-Moss there. That's great. Yes.

So you got, no complaints about that. But, but, how is it, is it, is it, does it just taste like Pekito Moss? It tastes like Pekito Moss. This is, so it's on the Warner Brothers studio a lot. And it's their, you ain't getting in.

Even if they try, they ain't getting in there. You can get in. On a studio tour. Take a studio tour. It's very easy to get it. Just roll off of the cart because you're trying to go get to the Piedmont. There's a lot of effort to try to kill Wigar if that's what you're trying to do. Don't come there to kill me.

Yeah, don't go there and kill him. We'll see. What song were we playing in your funeral? Oh, great question. Also, you're in good shape there because if they do shoot you, the pit is right, it films right there. Noah Wiley could step up to the play. No Wiley can save your ass. It will be three episodes to, to,

fix my bullet wound, but I'll come out on the other side. But then I'll have a permanent boner. I'll tell you the song he's playing. His favorite song to listen to while he drives is no music whatsoever. It's true. I do like to be alone with my thoughts. So I do think it might be appropriate to just play some white noise. Maybe just play a little bit of that for a bit. White noise on the way out of the fucking preview or all.

Not even listening to anything, just sort of like, what's going on in here? That's the priest is just doing that into the microphone. Give him a little music. All right, the Tetris theme. They're spinging your caskin around to put it into the grave.

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It was founded in 1994 in Jacksonville, Florida, by former firefighter brothers Chris and Robin Sorensen. Wow. In December 2021, the chain was acquired by Restaurant Brands International, which also owns Burger King. It has about 1,500 locations, mostly in the, Western Hemisphere, but there's a few in like the Middle East in Albania.

Each location has a firefighter themed mural, which is painted at the company's headquarters in Jacksonville by Joe Puscus, and no Puscus mural is the same as the other. So each one has a unique bespoke mural by the same artist. Seems like a lot. Yeah. Randy, you have a history with Firehouse. Okay. So my introduction to Firehouse Slubs is I was doing a show in Nashville, probably like 10, 12 years ago

or something, and the gal I was staying with who had thrown the show. Her brother-in-law was in town, and it was his 40th birthday, and every year on his birthday, what he did is he came in from rural Tennessee into Nashville, and he would go to every single firehouse subs for the day before and the day after, because you get a free sub at a firehouse sub on your birthday, and you can do it with the day before or the day after, and he would get 30 free subs. Whoa. No veggies, just meat and cheese, and then he would bundle them up and take them home and freeze them.

And that was his like birthday tradition. And this is like how I learned what firehouse was. I was like, wow, this is like a dedication to an incredibly subpar sandwich. Yeah, that's truly insane. It's a max 10 on your birthday or you go to different ones. There were 10 in the Nashville. Yeah, yeah. And he would spend an entire day doing it because they were like 20 miles apart at certain times.

That's wild. Yeah. So you're paying with your time. time, but you're effectively getting 30 free sandwiches. Yes, yeah, yeah. And he just would, he would call into his sister-in-law and be like, I got like three more to get before the end of the day. Like he really had like a whole, this was tradition for him.

Strange, strange, strange little man. That's what brings him joy. Yeah. I was just alerted recently. Ronnie Adrian sent me that a free steak and cheese melt for every Mike from Firehouse. and Michael Miguel Mikey

Michaela Michelle and both Spellings of Michelle you get a free You get a free steak and cheese melt I feel like a McAil should qualify as well We had this in the group chat at one point too Oh we did? I think it came I think came via Ronnie Past Patreon guest Ronnie Adrian

Yes I said and I said we gotta do it We should do firehouse subs and I didn't, we did, Ronnie, we're going to get you on for another episode. But, not Firehouse Subs. Oh, you told that to Ronnie. Yeah, I did say, we should have a Firehouse Subs. Sorry.

I didn't do it. Sorry. Not Brandy's fault. Well, I said to Ronnie, I said, also, we should have you back to review it. And he said, hello, my name's not Michael. I don't, I don't get the milk. Oh, okay. Then it's fine.

I was like, Ron, I know your name's not Michael. Did you have been saved as Michael? I know Ronnie is Ronnie. Ronnie's telling his other group chats. Mitch thinks my name is Michael. I don't think Ronnie's name is Michael. He knows my guy. He sent it to me because my name is Michael.

Your name is Michael. You go by Mitch, but your name is Michael Mitchell. I did not. I did not have been Mitchell. Oh, free sandwich. He's back from the grave for that. I was in Hayden, but I had to get that free sandwich. I was in heaven.

I got in. You did? Yes. Yeah, they saw Michael. They let me in there. Michael, the movie that proved I, did nothing wrong. He's been waiting in purgatory.

Michael Jackson's been in purgatory for however, 15 or how long? It's been a while. 16 and a half years. And then Michael came out, they sent that up to heaven and God said, okay, let him in. God got a screener. I see nothing wrong here. St. Peter, open up. Thank you.

What a benefit of being God, he gets a screener of everything. God gets early screeners. And they send him to him on DVD. They're like physical. He doesn't just get the streaming. I heard God just got Avatar 4 that he got the screen for Avatown 4. Isn't that cool? He's so lucky.

His DVD collection is probably crazy. It's got to be wild. But some of them like, he hasn't gotten the Odyssey yet. They're like some of them, they make them. They're a little protective. They play that close to the vest. He'll get it, but like you'll get it closer to release. You think he like replaced all his DVDs with Blu-rays or did he, is he okay having

a mixed collection? That's a good question. I would guess he's an archivist. He's a completionist, so he probably has his DVDs alongside his Blu-Rays. The Odyssey's woke. he's not getting into heaven. Sorry Christopher Nolan, you're out. The big controversy is that people, did you not know this?

The right way, you know about this. No one knows about this? There's no way that people complain the Odyssey is woke. It's like Elon Musk and these fucking idiots are like, the Odyssey is woke. There's no way any of these fucking morons ever read The Odyssey. They have no idea what's actually a clue. Wait, why do they think it's woke?

For a reason I don't even want to say on the podcast, but they're fucking morons. Of course. Yeah. But hey, God agrees. And Christopher Nguyen's not getting into heaven. I've, like, so with Firehouse Subs, I've had that. His story continues.

Well, come in anyways. We'll find out in part two. Thank you. So Firehouse Subs, we've reviewed on the podcast before. But it's been a while. That was, I think, maybe our first episode with Mary Sone. if you remember back in the day. He's now become a regular guest,

a frequent beloved guest, Mary Sown. But the... I remember eating Firehouse subs at Palmerston. At Palmerston. This is where we used to record the podcast, your apartment. But I've also, like, I used to go to Firehouse with some regularity.

And Jersey Mikes completely supplanted. There was a point where it's kind of two-handed. I'll go to Firehouse because I want like a hot sub. They'll do a fun hot sub. And they'll like, ah, I'll go to Jersey Mikes and mix it up. And then there's certain points, like, Jersey Mikes is just better than, strictly better than Firehouse.

And much, much better. They got a better soda selection, too. No mural, unfortunately. I'd like a mural of just a Jersey guy, I think, on the side of each one, yeah. They will have a wild, speaking of the soda, we don't like that talk about this a lot, but they will have wild cherry Pepsi on Fountain,

which is like, that's a great soda. I like a mural, but just like a guy in a white tank, like a Jersey guy on a white tank top. Exactly. Just a sunburned Italian. Those motherfuckers don't burn. It's true. so it'll be good for him in the afterlife.

All Italians go to hell. It's like all dogs go to heaven. That's the sequel. Oh, I can't believe Trump's not down here. I wanted to meet him. I sent them the... What's the main of the movie? I sent him the apprentice.

You let me in? You like my Trump? Yeah, that was really good. That was really good. It's pretty... Right now they have a steak and cheese melt. Steak and cheese, not milk, steak and cheese melt. Milk mansion, beautiful.

It's a beautiful mansion. It's beautiful, folks. We love it. They have a steak and cheese melt, and they have a chicken and cheddar rancher, which are kind of their LTOs. I think it's called the rancher, right? Am I right about that copy? Rancher's a funny, that's a funny, like a...

Because rancher's a profession. Yes. Yeah. I like it. I'm not saying anything bad about it. You know who has a great ranch dressing? It's funny to say this, but Prime Pizza. Great ranch dressing.

Oh, yeah, yeah. I do like Prime Pizza's Ranch. Great ranch. You can buy it. You can get a bottle. Except it's not like a sealed, like it is just. No, it's like a homemade bottle. It's like a homemade bottle.

Which I kind of like it means it's the same one you're getting from the restaurant. They're just like putting it in a bigger bottle for you. It's not like some weird different version. The only downside is that it's like this last like a week. I think like the expiration date was like a base. basically a week. Yeah. Yeah,

I have a week from today to finish my bottle of ranch. I'm just sipping on it. It's a good challenge, though. Matter to you, but. I go by expiration dates.

I think a sandwich can be out of this fridge for five to six hours. It's fine. But if the fridge is right there, you might as well just use it. No, it congeals in a different way. It congeals.

You get what I'm saying. A fridge sandwich is, it changes things a little bit. It changes things. The bread gets wet. The bread gets a little wet. Wet bread's not ideal. I don't like a wet bread.

We don't like the wet bread. I think I'd rather have that than worry that it's going to make me sick. I'll say this, my bread got wet sitting outside the fridge. Tushay. That is true. I think it's cold and wet. That's not a sandwich. Also, what did you order?

A sub. Yes. Turkey. Turkey. The turkey provolone. Yes. Do you have anything? You add anything to it?

Bacon. Water. No water. Just a glass. That kind of side of a glass. I did add oil and vinegar to it. Well, it can be part of it. I'll do it.

But it wasn't oily. It was water. Look, we were talking about it today. The thing that we said, I think we can all agree, is that with that chicken bacon rancher, the, it just, things seem a little antiquated at Firehouse Subs. The chicken seems like chicken you can't even get anymore,

is what I was saying about it. Quismos, yeah. Yes, you said, you said, Quiznos chicken. Quiznosed chicken was like the Like I was like oh man And like 2000 from like In the 2000s I ate so much chicken like this And now it just like doesn't exist anymore

Bad unseasoned very processed chicken breast In strips This is this is officially new grilled chicken breast Which I'm amazed that it's new This is a new addition to the menu Because it feels again it feels like something from the odds Or the 90s Crispy Bacon and Buttermilk Ranch

This is like the quality of chicken That you get on like an airport salad It was a really, really low-quality chicken. And that just kind of poisoned the well with this sandwich. Because I thought they have a decent ranch, but I just thought it was just overall just like kind of not a great combination. And we also, the steak and cheese milk, it melt. Jesus Christ. You're doing great.

I stop saying melt is milk. Steak and cheese milk is disgusting for it. It does sound really disgusting. We just got to check in the milk mansion for a weekend and get you. You'll be fine after that. You won't be making these mistakes. Anyway, check out a brandy special melt job. Oh, fuck.

Get milked on YouTube. Steak and cheese melt. Shave steak, provolone, brown sugar, caramelized onion, and peppers. I thought this was also pretty gross. This is bad. The brown sugar is off. Yeah, what are we doing? Why are we doing that?

Wait, the brown sugar was in... The caramelized onions were brown sugar caramelized onions. Oh, weird. Yeah. Yeah. Here's another thing. The protein is just bad in it. It's a really low quality steak.

The steak is bad. And that's, that's its main sin. Yeah. And I can tell you, look, we know that, what the fuck did Jersey Mike?

Bain Capital, or where the fuck it got bought by? It got bought by. Bain Capital was the Mitt Romney one. I believe it got bought by. No, not Rort Capital, though,

that's another one that buys up a bunch of restaurants. I believe is Blackstone. Blackstone. Blackstone. Blackstone. Blackstone, yeah. All right, good.

Bain doesn't own Jersey Mikes. Yeah. That's a plus. You adopted, Mike's way. I was born in it. That was good. Look, we're referencing Ken Bone. We're doing Bain impressions.

It might as well be that 2009. Exactly. The chicken's making more sense now. The chicken is making more sense. Or 2016 was Ken Bowen. But still, that is almost the line where I'm like, that chicken strips started to go away right around then. Yeah, yeah.

Coincidence, I think. I think Kim Bone had something to do with it. I, I, the steakums are bad in this steak and cheese. They were really bad. They were really bad. They're sick and a little, little, just chewy in a weird way. Yeah. Yeah, no, it was gross.

I like provolone, and I like that they have a, their default cheese there is provolone. I think they have a decent provolone, but I mean, it just wasn't enough to, even the melted quality was not enough to salvage this poor quality protein. Another LTO, and I didn't realize this, but this was one that I think we all agreed was hidden. the mac and cheese. Yes. Which is extra cheesy cream mac and cheese made with kabbatopi noodles. I was like, I was going in and I was like, okay, let's see what you got mac and cheese, especially because this is one of the bites I have later in the meal.

And I'm eating it and I was like, this one of the better things I've gotten from Jersey. It was. Without a doubt. Yeah, yeah. I'll just say that the highlights today were not the sandwiches. There were everything else. Chips, which are not from Firehouse, Mike. The chips from the head gum kitchen.

The back highlight. You mean firehouse. Firehouse, yeah. You've been saying, I think both of you have been saying Jersey mics. Did I say Jersey mics? A little bit. I think. How many times do they say Jersey mics?

Maybe just once. Just one time. You're fine. Everything's fine. It's okay. Wait, let's, let's, Mitch, well, let's just say, Firehouse Subs clean and then Emma can dub it over when we say Jersey mics. Firehouse Subs.

Firehouse Mikes. Subs. Put that in for me. Firehouse subs. Firehouse subs. Firehouse subs. Firehouse subs. We're not losing.

This is our first record of the week. Our brain should be. We have no excuse. Our brain should be working today. They're not working. Too much milk on the brain. I feel like it's what's happening. Too much milk on the brain.

Yeah. I don't drink it anymore. I need to start, I need to re-drink milk. I put it in a sketch a long time ago where I put it in a Mountain Dew bottle. But I don't think I drank it since that sketch. I haven't drank like a glass of. of milk since I did a sketch about it 14 years ago or whatever. I did the gallon milk challenge in college.

It failed. But I was challenged to it by a guy that was like mind-fucking one of my friends over. And I was like, sure, but we'll do it at your place. And then I just puked all over his bathroom and said, I guess you win. And I walked out. That's good as hell. Power move. Yeah, yeah.

It felt great. We didn't get into Price's Right stuff as much. but you were there when Drew took over, right, basically? Okay. I guess there's nothing else to... That's not a ton. Yeah. A favorite game?

Did you ever get to play them? Mm-mm. No, I just kind of was sequestered. Because you were working in the makeup department. Yeah, yeah. Were you given makeup to, because I guess Barker's beauties weren't there anymore, but like, were you, like, was the makeup team responsible primarily for the cast makeup, or we're also, you can't have been doing guests.

No, no, cast, yeah, yeah. There was like a couple. Makeup team would usually do the, me, the page, they would get my, makeup done just because they wanted me to look a little bit better walking around. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, because you wouldn't do the contestants. They would come on down. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But in some shows that have, like, contestants who are, like, backstage, I know they'll run them through the works. Here's a Barker beauty sitting right next to me. Oh, little Jimmy. Oh, Jimmy. We love Jimmy. I wish Bob Barker had filled me up. You horny Southern Bell. What the hell?

If you're spayed, then Bob would have loved you. He did love Petsky and Spade and Nudor. He and Spade. He and Bob would have loved you. He loved to rip out dogs, generals. His legacy above Hall. I'm a spade dog so you can roll doll. Jimmy.

Jesus, Jemmy. So crass. Here's what I like. The mac and cheese, which I thought was great. And you're taking home to go, like the leftovers. I'm taking some home, too. That's a testament to it. I thought the pickle.

I think their pickles are good. And I like to get a pickle spear with every sandwich. And the other sandwich I ordered for myself was a four-inch tuna on wheat. And I thought that tuna was pretty good. Really? It's one of their only cold subs. And I really enjoyed it. It's like just like a good quality tuna salad.

I like that it's made with provolone. I'm comparing it to Jersey Mikes. And I mean it's like, this is on par with Jersey Mikes. I don't think it's quite up to the level of Jimmy Johns, which I think is a better tuna. And that's the one place I'll give Jimmy John some particular. praise, but I thought it was a quality tuna. And that had been my one sandwich and I had the mac and cheese and I had the cookies, which we'll get to, I'd be like, I don't know, this place is all right. It's the specials that kind of knocked it down for me. Brandy, you also got yourself a smoked

turkey and provolome. Yeah, it was pretty good. I find their bread to be pretty subpar as far as like. The bread's not great, yeah. No, it's not great. I like a Jersey Mike's bread better. I almost like a Jimmy John's bread, brother, honestly. Yeah, honestly. I don't like Jimmy John. But I get where you're excited. I think you do like their bread better. And they also have the sandwich bread you can get there, just like the sliced bread, the multi-grain at Jimmy Johns. And that I'd prefer to what they have a firehouse. Yeah, I like, I like that quite a bit.

It was like, it was fine. It was sliced thin enough. So I appreciated that. Provalone as well. I think of the sandwiches that we tried, that was my favorite of the ones by far. The two specials were a real nightmare. If you're going to make it, so if you're going out to get a sandwich at a chain, you're getting Jersey mics or a place in, in the, that category. If you're making a sandwich on your own, what's your go-to sandwich?

I mean, I like a big multi-grained, like, real thick bread. I like a sprout, because a sprout makes me feel fancy. Love sprouts. Love a sprout on a sandwich. I like, I put chips on sandwiches a lot, too. I like a crunch. I'm very into, like, the textures of what it is. I don't do. I get, I think that the, I think that the firehouse subs, sandwiches are very soft. Yes, I added chips to mine that helped quite a bit. I was going to, because I I don't usually put chips on sandwiches, but I like to have chips, crunch them while I'm eating the sandwich. But this place specifically, like, you're eating a Jersey Mike sandwich, for instance. You're getting the crunch of the veggies and stuff like that, which you can get here, but they just seem like the bread and everything just seems so soft.

Yeah. You know what? This is funny. I think today is the day I learned that Firehouse Subs is maybe just kind of shitty. I don't think I ever thought of this before. I think I kind of thought it was good. Let me say, let me make this remark. because we've observed the insidification of everything.

Since our last review, it was acquired by Burger King's parent company, which would explain the erosion in quality, that they're just like kind of, you know, whatever, cheaping out a little bit to increase margins. When we reviewed it in 2018 with Mary Sown, I gave it a four and you give it a three forks three times. Now, without spoiling our fork scores, mine's going to be nowhere near that today.

But is it possible that Firehouse, which I used to get regularly on my own was just better at a certain point. And maybe partly was a pandemic, maybe partly was the acquisition by, you know, this private equity firm. But whatever it is, it's just sort of like this place has gotten shittier.

Yeah, you know, I got this, totally possible. I got that steamer sandwich today. I do like that steamer sandwich, but I do, I think it could just be shittier. I can't tell it the bread is shittier. Like the bread has never been, it's always been strange bread. Yeah, it's never stood out to me before.

But it was better than subway, right? Like we're saying, like, this place is better than subway. It's still better than subway, but you compared it to, Brandy, you compared it to Quiznos. And it would say we watched a similar slow slide into mediocrity with Quiznos. Where, like, I remember Quiznos back in the day who was like, hey, Quiznos is like pretty good, actually. Quiznos is a notch above subway. And now I'm like, I don't know. It's maybe just a more expensive subway.

Yeah. Well, I think Quisnos, when they did like the Slice Deli meat, like hot samuoshos, those still were pretty good. It is like, it is the fake chicken, the chunky, the chunky, chewy meat that become the problem. Yeah. Yeah. And they at least would toast that. I guess that's maybe another thing is like it maybe tasted like a little toaster or whatever. It felt like it firmed it up a little bit.

I don't, I have no idea. Never one subway was like, oh, we can toast it. I promise, we can do it too. They put toasting ovens in there real quick and it kind of ate. And then kind of killed Quiznos. I mean, also the location issue would. with Quiznos, too. Firehouse has that similar problem of that, like,

firehouse subs are fewer and far. Subway's still more convenient than Firehouse subs, right? It's like a togos. Have you done togos? We have done togos. It's been a while since we've done togos. That's a place that's really receding. Yeah.

There are a lot fewer togos than they used to be, but I like togos. Just our whole thing. Fast food just sucks. Everything sucks. It sucks so bad. I almost got the Wendy Spicey Chicken Sandwich. because I want to just try the new one that's like an hour monstrosity.

I'm so mad about it. Wendy's is like the saddest story to me in fast food. Wendy's is fucking. It's a fucking mess. And I'm like, they changed the one thing that was still working. They changed their spicy chicken sandwich. Like changing the Big Mac.

I've said this before. It's like changing your Big Mac. Why the fuck did you do this? And I couldn't even bring myself to do it. I just, everything has gotten so much worse. But I do wonder with Firehouse Subs, which what is the,

what's the connection with, Do they give money to firehouses? Is that what it is? Yes, I believe a portion of their sales. Do we have to see any of these guys shirtless or what? What's the deal? Let's see the fucking hunks with their shirts off. I don't know if they take their shirts off,

but I believe a portion of their proceeds go to firefighter-related charities. I believe they get free subs on 9-11 too. Right. That's pretty good. And if you go before 9-11, you get one as well, the day after. Yeah. I'd like to swing by a bunch of different. Imagine showing up the day before and then being like, oh, fuck.

technically we're not supposed to. I'm a firefighter. They should be real firefighters, not calendar firefighters. This is the best we're going to get. So you can use your imagination. These firefighters are in full garb. I mean, this isn't doing me any favors. How can I jack off to this?

Life finds a way. I wish their sandwiches had fun names. I think that would be helpful. Well, the one fun name, Mitch, is the New York steamer, which is the one you got. This is corn, beef, brisket, pastrami, melted provolone, deli mustard, mayo, and Italian dressing. I didn't have any of this, but I've had this sandwich before.

In fact, last time we reviewed it, I got a New York steamer myself. It's still okay. It's like, I just am now being like, there were a lot of elements of these sandwiches today that reminded me of Subway. And I was like, was this always just a little bit better than Subway and not like that great? Because like the hot, the steak and cheese is from Jersey Mikes are way better. Way better. Way, way, way, way, way better.

And they shouldn't be because they do more hot sandwiches at Firehouse. And like we said, they've been bought by not Bain Capital, but whatever it is, Jersey Mike's. Blackstone. So it's like, so they're getting worse, but they still are a big step above Firehouse sub. So I'm confused because I didn't give four forks back in the day, but I feel like I was like close. I still kind of liked it. Well, I wonder if, because Jersey Mikes, too, like they're cutting everything fresh for you. I wonder what the packaging situation is with the firehouse.

Yeah, I mean, that's the disadvantage of not going in person. So I didn't get to witness the preparation. I mean, they would make it in front of you, like any sandwich shop. But I wonder how fresh the ingredients are, no idea. They got little bins of meat. Probably got, I mean, my memory is they have bins. They never slice the meat to order. Yeah.

Man, wait, so hold on. What is the connection to, what is the connection to the, they just give money to firefighters? It was founded by firefighters. Oh, it was founded by firefighters. support firefighting related causes. I do think it's a better. It would be a pretty sexy scene, a fire at Milk Mansion. We got those firehouse sub guys going in there with the Milk Mansion ladies.

Fire hose is full of milk. Spray me down. That'd be fantastic. As long as they're yelling insults at me, I'm fine with that. Get out of the way. We're trying to put all the fire. Fucking all worked up. Fucking idiot.

That's what I wanted. I do think it's a better sandwich than cop sandwich, which is an horrible other place. Cop sandwich. Cop sandwich is not great. Not great. We don't like it. Cop roll. They treat me great at cop sandwich.

I won't even go to ice subs. I'll go to ice subs. I go to ice subs. I don't support ice subs. I don't support it, but I'll go there. Yeah, yeah. But then I'll like, I'll steal a bag of chips. Hell yeah.

You know, versus baked ways. Take that patriarchy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, take that patriarchy. Ice subs, weirdly,

good ice. They have very good, they have a pellet ice there. Good pellet ice, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's really, really, really high quality stuff. Yeah. I mean, if you're going to have something,

the very least. You got to do that. Cop sandwiches, yeah. None of these places, fire, look, Firehouse sub is better than those, than those other two, yeah, for sure.

First responders, Pita Palace. Not great. First responders is bad. First responders is no good. Like, Emma, Amelia, how are your sandos? I ate half of mine. I enjoyed it. I'm going to take the other half home.

I used to get Firehouse all the time in college. And it does feel like the sandwiches have gotten significantly smaller. Like, I used to get a sandwich and I felt like I could eat half for dinner tonight and the other half for dinner tomorrow. This sandwich does not feel that way. It feels much smaller than like a Jersey Mike. A four-incher is pretty... Is that a mini at Jersey Meyer?

Yeah, fucking huge four-incher. They can handle this much meat. I mean, I'm saying four, does, is a mini at Jersey Mike's? Is that five inches? I don't even think it is. I don't know. I don't forget in terms of length there. I think the regular is eight inches and that, yeah.

It's four inches, eight inches, and 12 inches are the three sizes at Firehouse. Oh. Yeah, but I think also within. the sandwiches themselves, they may just be using less protein. But, Emma, which sandwich did you get? I got the turkey and provolone. No onions. So you both got the same sand down. Yeah. Yeah. Mine was mid. Yeah, it's like, because that's a baseline Jersey Mike's order for me and you as well.

Yeah, if I was sitting at home like, I want a sub for dinner. I think I'm going to get Jersey mics because it feels like more bang for my book. It's a bigger sandwich. I like it better. Yeah. Just feels fresher. Yeah. Yeah. I like getting it Mike's way. Yeah. I like that there's a way. Jersey Mike's fucking wipes the floor with fucking firehouse subs. Who are we kidding? Oh, yeah. Come on.

I just thought of a character. What's that? Jersey Mike DeLorean. This is the Mike's Way. That's a character? Yeah, that's what he says. I don't know if it's a character. Okay, well, it's like a thing that he would say.

Are you going to see Mandalorian and Grogu? Yeah, I'm going to. I'll see it. I'll see it. I don't think I'm going to like it. I doubt you can like it. Where are you on Star Wars? Um, casual.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I like, I like, um, I like the movies. I like it as an event. There's a lot of it now and I just haven't, haven't kept up. So it doesn't feel special and it's not, I don't think it's for me. So I'm kind of just like, whatever.

You don't need to watch any of the Disney stuff. What do you think of Jersey Mike DeLorean? This is Mike's way. What do you think of that? Well, do you think it's a practical puppet or do you think it's a CGI situation? That's a great question. Practical. It's got to be practical.

Okay. Just making sure. Yeah. Because Grogu was they were initially going to see Giam. Oh, man. I hate Grogrew so much. I do like, I do like the fact that Grogu is a puppet. I like this practical.

That is helpful. That is helpful. What's his name? What's his name? Werner Herzog loves the puppet. He does. So much. He's kind of the reason they didn't see GI.

I know. I know. I think he doesn't really know what Yoda is. He just like the puppet in of itself. Yeah. I like that. Yeah. I love that.

Warner Herzog doesn't know what Yoda is. That's great. The cookies, so one of the LTOs is the limit time offerings is the double chocolate chip cookie, which is a highlight for me. There's a really good cookie. And I'm not a double chocolate guy. I'm also not a white chocolate guy. Oh, okay, double chocolate. Because you love the double chunk chocolate cookie.

I do love the double chunk chocolate cookie, yeah. Okay. But that's a sorry, double chunk chocolate cookie. They're gone. They're done. You said they were going to be around forever. The Costco guys are. They're still alive.

Has their moment passed? They're gone. No. You can get going to Costco still. Honestly, the Rizzler's kind of gone. I'm sorry. Ristler's going to come back in a few years. When he's like 15, he's hitting the teen years.

It's not good. Things are not going to be good. All I know is, I'm telling you. Whenever, whenever A.J. has his funeral, I'll be there going, boom, boom, boom, boom. Out of respect. Big Justice and Rizzler will be with us for a long time. Of course. I hope so. The double chocolate.

I'm not sure if you're going to be, I don't know if you're going to, AJ's going to die before you. I might not outlived AJ. That's a goal. That's nice to have a goal though like that, you know. The chocolate chip cookie. I'll be there for, when Rizzler turns 18, I'll be there to watch him vote for Trump for his first time. His voice starts cracking. Maybe you shouldn't be tracking Rizzler's 18th birthday.

That's a much less business. I got a website that's counting down the days. The chocolate chip cookie, an oatmeal cookie, and the seasonal cookie, which is the aforementioned double a chocolate chip cookie, not a double chunk chocolate cookie. I think it's, I think these cookies are all great. And we should have, I shouldn't say great. I think they're all very good. And I think that for whatever reason we now associate, maybe it's Subway is doing, we now associate sandwiches with the sandwich shops with having good cooking. cookies. And they do have quality cookies here, and that is a plus. A definite,

a definite boost to its force. We should make, uh, like Michael, we should make Jared, uh, the movie Jared. And it goes up, it goes right up until when he becomes the spokesperson or subway and then it ends. Doesn't, doesn't mention any of the child pornography stuff, never gets into that. If it's, if it's Jared with a kid. Get that motherfucker and it. Get him into heaven. It's just him like being kind to him. He like sees a subway and that's when the movie ends. Yeah. That's good. That's good.

Oh, man. We're going to make Jared at some point. Anyways, go on. That would be a funny or die video if you were still over there. Yeah, I mean, I probably would have made Jared gotten paid $150. I would have loved to play the role of Jared. It would have been a lot of fun for me, get paid $50. You think you would have been Jared?

What the fuck? Maybe before. You're a fuck. How dare you? We could use some CGI to make me look like after Jared If you think that the weight doesn't work No, no, no, yeah Jared also looks like shit.

You look better than Jared now. Oh, thanks. I look better than Jared now. There was a time when Jared was more slim than I am now. There was a time when he was a slender man. That's not fucking true. It's true. He was very slender.

He got very skinny there. They got really skinny. He had the big jeans. Yeah, but he wasn't like skinny. You are, you, you, you, you do have body dysmorphia. You are thinner than, you're in better shape than Jared was now. Can we get a side by side with me and Jared? Yeah, put it up.

Where are his pants, by the way? Wise bottom. Good question. At the estate sale. You, you, you look better than that, like, fucking freak right now. He's pretty skinny. He's pretty lean there. Skinny doesn't necessarily mean healthy either.

No, it's true. I mean, I'm just saying, like, he got pretty slim there. I think you'd have to cast, like, someone with a slender build just for, the visual reference if you were making the Jared parody, which why would you make that? But if you were doing it. Who the fuck would you,

who would you get? I don't know, I mean like if I was actually casting, I think like Mike Cassidy or something like that, very good actor who's also got lean, or Paul Russ could play it. Paul Russ would be very funny Jared. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But also like, I think you could, yeah, as far as actors in the era, I don't know, they'd probably like get John Heater or something, right? Pretty good. Yeah. John Heard, pretty good, pretty good. Back in the Napoleon Dynamite aftermath. Let's get John Hamm to do it.

Let's get John Hamm is in. He definitely is in for comedy. Ham does like comedy. You know what? Ham does like comedy. He really does. Get him to play Jared, then put him in a fat suit for the rest of it. Come on. Let's push. Let's make him not like comedy.

It wouldn't be demeaning at all to come in as the body double for it. Like, we're going to see G.I. John Ham's head on your fat body. Oh, cool. This is great. We have actually, we have Jared's before pants And they don't fit me The indignities that you fucking suffer Doing all this fucking bullshit

Anyways, Jared looks like shit Jared looks like shit A bad man Yeah, I guess we could say a bad man But we'll make the biopic We also have a, they sell sauces there And we have a bottle of gaita sauce Which I figure we could test out

As part of our evaluation, Amelia is walking this into us right now. This is very exciting. I liked that you guys got one of these. I was very happy. So this is a... Why don't you want to cross the camera? You can cross the camera. I don't want them to save the video. Very professional.

This is a gator hammock gator hammock. Yeah, so I mean I don't know where the hammock comes from, but we see a gator here. The gator is breathing fire. It says hot. It would be funny to see a gator in a hammock. That would be funny, but that's not part of the key art. Okay, okay. You know the first ingredient

is Louisiana-style hot sauce. That's very funny. They're just using hot sauce as an ingredient. That's just like crystal in there? Yeah, is it crystals? It might just be crystal with some other stuff. Man, what a fucking... All right, first of all, first of all, first of all, they struck out here on the bottle.

There's no gator in a hammock. It's just a gator that's just saying hot. Yeah, there's no hammock? That sucks. He should be in sunglasses and a hammock. I agree, it sucks. The gator's just yelling hot. Like, did he eat something that was hot?

hot? He must have ate some of the sauce. Look, I'm going to put a little hot sauce on each of these plates. There's also some zesta crackers, and I think Amel's is getting some mac and cheese as well. So this is the Firehouse Subs official sauce. It's one of their sauces. They have like 12 sauces you can order. But I got this one. Okay. Yeah, so we'll try it out.

All right, go ahead. Here we go. I'm going to destroy this a little bit. Brandi, how much, because I'm a bit of a heat seeker. I like a spicy sauce. Where are you on spicy? I like spice, but I need to have another flavor. Can't just be hot.

I'm with you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I definitely, because I don't like hot for hot sake. Yes. That's the thing. That's what makes me something of a heat seeker. Is that like I. The spice is right.

The spice is right. The spice is right. Hey, how about that? We work there. It is nice. It is nice synergy. All right. I'm putting just a little bit, little kitty pool on each of our plates.

All right. I'm going to pour it onto the mac and cheese here. And then also we can take forks of the mat. Here, can we hand it in there over. Yeah. Feel free to distro that if you want more. So it comes out in kind of a glug. It looks like it has some granules in it.

Yep, yeah, yeah, yep. Like, it's kind of like coffee grounds in it, basically. I get a little finger test first. It does look kind of thin, like a crystal hot sauce. It is. Why, did you hand me that plate? It is thinner than I expected, and here's some forks of anyone want to. It does.

It maybe is just crystal hot sauce, I'm on. Oh, thank you. Yeah. All right, I'm going to take a bite of this mac and cheese. It feels like it should be against the rules to put hot sauce in. your hot sauce like that. I agree. Make a hot sauce or just like

sell crystal. I doused this bad boy. I doused the mac and cheese in this. There's a lot, a lot in that. Trying to crinkle this away from the microphone for the mesophoniacs,

which we've learned misophonia is real. Oh yeah. My boyfriend has it. I'm a nightmare for him. Let me tell you something. It smells like hot sauce in here now. I...

Love the mac and cheese with the hot sauce on it. Exciting. This has some real burn to it, I will say. Yeah. I will have to enjoy the mac and cheese, but I'm not sure a saltine is the best test bed for the sauce. Thank you so much, Brandi. Yep.

I'm excited for this. Brany and I said we should do the mac and cheese with the hot sauce. You kind of poo-poot it, I have to say. I was wrong. You were fucking wrong. And I'm listening and learning. In college, I would make like a box of mac and cheese, and I would, like, sit with a bottle of hot sauce.

sauce and like bite for bite, just like put hot sauce on it. Yeah. I used to Tabasco the fuck out of mine. Yeah. But these days I'm not as much of a Tabasco version. Oh.

Although the Tabasco halapeno I really like. Oh, yeah. That one's nice. That was good. It's fucking good. No, that's really good. The mac and cheese with the hot sauce. That's great.

That's the winner. If I had this in a cookie, that's great. Pretty damn good. That gaita sauce. Mm-hmm. Again, maybe another mild boost to its forked quark. Honestly, I mean, look, the sandwiches were bad.

The sandwiches were bad. That's the point of this. And were they always bad? I don't know. I truly can't tell. I want more of the mac and cheese. There's any left in there? Yeah, there's a little bit left in there.

Fuck yeah. Hi, I'm Beck Bennett. I thought I was Beck Bennett. No, no, no, no. I'm Kyle Mooney. Sorry about that. Exactly. No, all good. All good.

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We should get to our final thoughts. So Brandy, here's how this will work. We'll each go around, give a closing argument, if you will, on firehouse subs. You include, you know, the thoughts from this visit, but any thoughts from previous visits, if warranted. And then end by giving that a score from zero to five. Forks. Your guest, your thoughts, your fork score on Firehouse Subs. Okay. So, I do think the mac and cheese was good. This sauce at least was good. It leads me to think that their other sauces were good, are probably pretty good too. They're doing that well. The cookies were good, although there is a

part of me that wonders, because when we got the cookies, we were all just heartened by the sandwiches. And the cookies boosted our happiness. But I, like, if I had just had that without the disappointing sandwiches. I still would have liked the cookie, but I think we gave it more than than we would have because of how bad the sandwiches were. That's fair. We were also talking about that the cookies were not hard. We were afraid that they're going to be hard, and we were saying it's rare that a cookie that's hard is good. And I brought Tate's. Yes. Tate's a good, crispy cookie. And maybe even more crispy than hard, I guess, like crispy cookie. But normally I like a soft cookie. We love a soft cookie. But also, crumble, like the way cookies have gone,

and like crumble are like too doughy. We don't love crumble, right? No, no. It's like a cake, but I like, sometimes I like a cake cookie, but that's just like too like doughy and kind of gross. There's always seemed kind of raw. Yeah, they're like oversized and- That's why I think these cookies were like, they were decent.

They were decent. Yeah. And oatmeal raisin was really good, and I don't usually say that very often. So I usually was good with that. I mean, I think I'm going to, I think I'm going to give it, it feels,

I'm going to give this a 2.5 because I think that the cookie of the mac and cheese is they were good. The sandwich is below average. I think they pull it back up because it would be a two, but then we have heroes involved. So I think we'd throw in that extra half.

That's nice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Two forks, two tines. Yeah, yeah. I went three and three quarters last time we were here. I didn't go into the four, four. I did not put it into the Golden Play Club. And I think I was right.

Wags. I was the holdout, and I think I was right then. No, you weren't the holdout, but Mary went lower. Oh, she did. Um, well, we were right. And you were wrong, I guess is what we're trying. Mary was more right. How about? Okay. She went lower than you. So she was righter than you. She was righter than me. Mary was righter than me. You were the most wrong. But Mary was, fine, I was the most wrong. I was also wrong about the hot sauce in the mac and cheese. We should have, we were good, we were right to do it. But you know what? They were wrong because the hot sauce.

sauce want them a lot of points, but the gator just yelling hot on the bottle. I mean, step it up. That does suck. Hot. That's what you get, the gator yelling hot. You want, that you need more, you need them in the hammock. But it is, it's a good hot sauce. Firefighters are good. I like that they celebrate 9-11 day, and I like that they, that they, that they, that they, that they, that they, that they, they, that they celebrate 9-11 day. I like that they celebrate 9-11. I like that they celebrate 9-11. I like that they I like that they give subs to firefighters

on 9-11. I like that they give Michael's and Mike's free subs. I think that's fun. I like that too. I'm eating mine in heaven. Hey, Michael, pass me a bite. Who's that?

Oh, God. Me too. Spacey. he's up there. No free subs for Kevin's. I just, I think that this was hurt by the LTOs that we had. They can't, they got to do something with their proteins. Their proteins are not good.

That new grilled chicken is legit bad. Tastes like a hospital food and we're not, we're past that. The country is past stripped, cheap stripped chicken breast. It's over. You can't, that can't be your new L.T. in 2020. It just, it does not work.

And the same for the fucking steakums with the steak and cheese. Both did not work. The steamer was still, the New York steamer was still good. So, or good enough. So for me,

I'm going to go, this is almost generous, but I'm going to go three forks. The name New York steamer is funny. We should acknowledge that. It's true. It's the one name that is actually at all any sort of effort.

All the rest are like, you know, The furthest they'd go is the engineer, and that's a turkey, provolone, and savory mushrooms. They're mostly just- Alien? Is that what is a reference to? No, I think it's the guy on the fire truck. Oh, fire. Yeah, that's right.

Okay. Stop drop and roll is right there. Stop drop and roll is right there. That is great. That's wonderful. But they also got, like, just the Italian and the turkey bacon ranch or whatever. Some of those are kind of generic. I don't love the inconsistency.

I certainly don't love the inconsistency of the sandwiches themselves. The steak and cheese, Melt was just straight up bad. And the, maybe it was, maybe steak and cheese milk would be better. Maybe that's why I keep Frodean slipping it. And I also think the chicken and tender rancher. The steak and cheese milk would be better? Yeah.

I don't know. Then this melt. This is a pretty bad melt. It was a horrible melt. Also, it wasn't even a melt. In what way was a fucking melt. You can't call that a melt. And also, you know what really stood out?

I got to say it, Jersey Mike's, they're putting those vegetables on the fucking flat iron. They're getting steamed up and chopped up. This thing just felt like. Yeah. The vegetables were plopped on top there, Lex. And they're using, they're caramelizing it in brown sugar for some reason. The chicken cheddar rancher, again, we remarked on the really, really low quality chicken that was just such a millstone around its neck.

I do like the pickles. I didn't have any of the New York steamer, but I've had that before. I do think that the tuna sandwich was decent. and I thought that the mac and cheese was great. The cookies were very good. Gator sauce I am a fan of. And they are heroes. I gave cop subs one fork, and I gave ice subs four forks.

But again, I really liked the ice. You love the ice. Yeah, the ice was great. And that really plus... Yeah, where are you going to stand on this? You don't believe 9-11 happened, so this is not... Yeah, I'm a 9-11 denier. You're just taking their money at the door.

No, I don't know. I mean, this is a pretty bad effort. I would go one and a half forks based off the sandwiches, just because they don't think it's quite at one fork based off of the tuna and then people's responses to the turkey being fine. But the gator sauce, sorry, the gator sauce, the mac and cheese and the cookie are enough for an additional, at least tine.

and then you get another time for them being heroes. So two forks. That's where I land. Two forks. Skathing-wise, you cut your view and half. I mean, this was bad. Would you go back here based on this? I wouldn't.

Why would I go back to Firehouse unless it was another, again, for content? I'm going to say this. I think that they should give free subs to Michael on that specific day. And if your last name is Randazizi, they should give you a free sub as well. Rand is easy.

Should get free subs on 9-11. Yeah, yeah. He should get, Rand is easy. you should get a free sub on 9-11. Firehouse subs, you should give Steve Ranazizi a free sub on 9-11. That's what the, you know, when that scandal came out, that was the whole thing. It was like, I can't get free subs on 9-11 now. Come on, man.

We've got a party sub every year. That's what he got. That was the free one he asked for. All right, that was a review of firehouse subs. It's time for a segment. I've got a mystery beverage. And Mitch and Brandy must guess what it is. It's the return of the Weiger challenge.

Wow. You are each being handed a glass of something. Ooh, ice cold. It is a cold glass, and feel free to describe this hue. Feel free to describe the viscosity and then any other sensory elements you're getting in. It's Baja Blast colored. It's Baja Blast colored, and it is bubbling. So that makes me feel like it could be Baja Blast.

It is, yeah, it's the color of Baja. It's this kind of aquamarine color that's like a light, like a blue Gatorade meets a mountain dew. And also it smells like Baja Blast a little bit, too. Is this a sugar-free bound Baja blast? because I know that happens. It is sugar-furi Baja Blast. This is the quickest that we've ever,

me and the guest, I mean, this is a tie. Also, by the way, we just fucking knocked, we just knocked this the fuck out of the park right here. Baja Blast zero. This is Baja Blast. You both think Baja Blast zero. I think so, hold on. Or, yeah, Baja Blas zero.

I do not think, I don't think it's regular Baja blast. No, no, I don't think there's sugar in it. Well, it's the tie, but good. Still on. Is it regular Baja blast? I'm not getting the... I'm not getting the extra sugar flavor, but it might... I'm now wondering...

I don't think there's a diet. I think it just goes straight to zero. Oh, yeah. No, that is true. There's not a diet, yeah. Yeah, there's not a diet of it. He's playing so coy that it's making me be like, is this just regular Baja blast? I don't think it is. I think it's... I'm giving you my poker face.

my papa po poker fan I'm gonna go Baha you like Lady Gaga you give you for Gaga? I might go like Gaga too My brother loves Lady Gaga randomly he like will listen to her songs This is very tough because my mind

is changing as I'm as I'm drinking it I know the zero is good because I do get Baja bless zero but it's also like I'm used to it from a fountain drink which is more bubbly so it's making it difficult to like really parse it out. I think this is original Baja blast.

I've changed my mind. Which has pivoted to original Baja blast. And you still think zero? It's hard. It is genuinely hard to tell. It's a good zero. I know what's good. I'm going to say zero because I'm not getting like, I'm not getting the little sugar feeling in the back of my brain right now.

So I think it's zero. You are correct that it is Baja blast. heavy. Mitch wins the Wigr Challenge. This is full sugar Baja Blast. Well fought. Is this the one from the can? Randy, though, immediately clocks. That might be it. It might just be from the can

is enough for it to taste a little bit different. A little different. Because I only ever have it from the tap. I thought it was either one of two things. I thought it was Baja Blast or there's a gatorade that is this exact color. That's not a glacier freeze. It's another one. Brandy immediately clocking that it was Baja blast colored. I love that. I love that. That's why you describe that. That's the color of Baja Blast. I love it so much.

Yes. But it's like I was worried you both were going to overthink it to away from Baja Blast. But no, you stuck to that. It is very much Baja Blast. It's uneniable. It's just full sugar from a camp. But you know what's funny is I was like, at first, when I first took a sip, I was like, it's zero. And then I was like, wait, let that just sit in my teeth.

I could just feel it's sitting in my teeth. And I could feel the sugar rotting my teeth. But it was, Baja Blast Zero is good. That's the true thing. They do a good job with it. That's a lesson like using the full clock on who wants to be a millionaire. Don't just say locked in right away. Take a moment to think it through.

Take a bit, sit with it. Baja Blas Zero, what I drank the entire time I was editing milk job. Wow. Which you can find on YouTube. Great beverage. Yeah, yeah. Honestly, perfect editing beverage. What's your Taco Bell order?

It's changed. Baja Blas Zero is in there. Baja Blas Zero is in there. Do you ever do the Baja Blas VEEEEEEEEEE? Freeze. Love the freeze. It's very fun. Really love the freeze.

When we painted my house, I did, I got freezes for us. I'm doing outdoor yard. I have a taco bell two blocks away from my house. So every time I'm doing outdoor yard work, I get a Baja Blast freeze. It really is like just a little treat. I'm a big nachos bell grande, but I also get a potato soft taco and then I pop that on there because I want the extra potatoes in there. But the meal is like disappeared from the menu now, which is like, it's just a

cart. Now the deal's all fucked up. I don't like it. But I like the chalupa meal with ground beef. And then I get a soft taco with it usually. So I like that. I usually go on ground beef as my protein there. I think ground beef is better than the steak generally or all or all throwing beans. Or the chicken. Tocobel also does have kind of the, the, I've never had their chicken because I assume that it's the weird. It's kind of like that chicken, but it's in so much sauce. and also probably better, by the way. But it's just in so much sauce. But I'll get the chicken if it's like a special burrito.

Like it's like the chicken melts burrito or something. I'll get like I don't, I'm not even thinking of the right thing. But like I'll like I'll get it if it's in a barriot, like a specialty burrito. Sometimes the beans is honestly the protein I want the most. And like I think it's really good. But yes, the I like that you shout out the potato soft taco. You should maybe become bean boy. You said instead a burger boy.

Bean boy is maybe better for you. Can it be the burger boy and the bean boy? No, you got to choose one. The burger boy, the bean boy, tiger, Nick Weiger. Can I ask why it was about, was it this because there were leftover Baja blast from when the Taco Bell people visit us?

Well, I had, no, I had those like in the hopper for a bit to do for a Wiger challenge. The Baja blast? Yeah, the mountain, yeah, and the cans. I like it, you pick the perfect guess for it. Yeah. I also, by the way, I think that I would clean up but now I'm like ooh

because every time I'm watching one of these videos on YouTube and they're taking sips and there is of the sodas and then they get diet confused with regular I'm like how are you getting confused the regular this was one of the first times where I was like ooh I actually can't completely tell right now but I think I would clean up at that soda challenge

it would have to be sodas that I actually knew of course but like uh yeah you don't do well in every segment but you are quite good at the Weiger Challenge I'm going to the Weger Challenge of yours I forget what your record is it's documented in the Doe boys wiki, but you definitely have a winning record. I have a winning record in the wider channel.

Mitch is a potent foe. That's awesome. I went to a, when the grillers first came out of Taco Bell, uh, lady, lady got invited to a, an influencer party for them. And it was like they'd taken over a house in Silver Lake and like,

had a silent disco in one room and then you could just take pictures with the grillers. And, um, that was fun. That is fun. I was, I was like, I've never been invited to anything like that before or since.

But for one day, I was like, okay, I'm like a Taco Bell influencer, this is cool. It sounds better than the KFC influencer event we were invited to. I also like when people were like, I saw the temptations live in our generation. It's like, I went and met the grillers. I mean, I want to go to that Taco Bell announcement that they do every year that's like whenever Apple drops a new products. It looks so cool.

How the fuck have we not? We've done the podcast for 10 fucking years. Also, how do they not invite us to that keto? Because I watch that on my own. And then also, like, how is, like, I've seen who hosts these things. How is, like, Gabris not hosting this? How is not, like, Gabris and Betsy. That's a great point.

It's just like they fucking crush it. And also, invite us. Invite the dough boys. I see who's there. And I will also come. Invite Brandy. Invite lady to lady. Why are we, how are we that bad at our?

Yeah, are we that bad? If we're that bad, just tell us. I don't think we're that bad. I don't know. I'm questioning. Maybe we are. You're making us doubt ourselves, Taco Bell. We've done nothing but stick up for you for 10 years.

I think you guys are great. You can't get invited to a fucking keynote. I think they're messing up. I think it will only improve next year if you got to try the Baja Blast cheesecake live the first time. Can you imagine? Oh my gosh. I would be so fun.

I mean, Hollywood does. Not only is Hollywood not care about us, but food Hollywood doesn't even care about us. We can't get into food Hollywood. The fucking CFO of Do Boy or the CFO of Taco Bell can't introduce the doughboys. I've said it's my favorite restaurant. Yeah. Sucks. My life sucks.

Well, that was your 20th win at the Weiger Challenge. Wow, Mitch, congratulations. That was my 20th total? Yeah, that's what it says. How many of there been? I guess, uh, I have to do the math. 20 seems low to me. 20 wins, though.

20 wins, but we've done it for 10 years. Yeah, I know, but we don't do it ever. We don't do it even every... We've done the Weiger Challenge. The We've done the original segment? It is, that is an original segment. It's a year one segment. It's a year one segment.

We go stretches where we don't do the Weiger challenge. It's a periodic feature of the podcast. We didn't do it for any of COVID. That's part of it. None of COVID. That's a great point. Good point. There was no way to do it.

46. 46. So I have a losing record? Wait, Mitch has a losing record? No. Yeah, 20 out of 46 means he's lost 26. Yeah. I thought he'd walk.

I'm looking at the score right here. It says Vic McAil is 19 to 8. so that there is a running track of this the whole time. 19 and 8 means there have been 27 total up to this point, and this is the 28th, and Mitch has won 20 times and lost 8 times. So why did I count 46? I don't know. You tell me.

Where did you count 46? 46 is too many Wigra challenges. Look, one, two, three, four, five, six. Wait, what are you counting? She's counting that they're all listed in there, so she's counting. I'm counting all the times that a challenge appeared, and then it says 19 to 8. So there's 46 entries in the trial. We need your help.

What are you doing? Yeah, try to figure this out as we're doing this. Just like a restaurant value of your feedback. Let's open to the feedback. It turns out I suck at the Wager Challenge. I'm not going to anything. No, because it says your running record is 20 and 8. So maybe we weren't tracking the record for all these.

Maybe some of them were one-offs. Maybe the live shows don't count. That might be part of it. The live shows maybe don't count. Because we do it at the live shows. You feel you're better at a live show with an audience or at, like, in studio? Oh, I feed off. That you.

My taste spuds fucking to go to the next level. We'll try to get the bottom of this. Today's email is for Monica in the feedbag. Dear Doe Boys, long time listener,

first time feedbacker after listening to the intro for the California Fish Grill episode and hearing Nick talk about aquaculture, I wanted to give my input as someone who works in the business. I am the research manager

at a regional aquaculture association and Ketchikan, Alaska, where we produce salmon via sustainable aquaculture, not the fish farming you're thinking of. What we do is grow salmon from eggs up to smolt, basically teenage fish, and release them into the ocean,

where they then put on 99% of their body mass before returning to be caught by everyone who fishes in the area. If you guys ever find yourselves in southeast Alaska, hit me up and I'll give you a tour of the salmon hatcheries here. I haven't lived in Ketchikon forever. I want to do the doughboys non-contiguous tour where we went to Alaska and Hawaii. Just moved here in 2024 for my husband's job. Ketchikan is a weird place in many ways. It's On an island, people call it a drinking town with a fishing problem, and we have very limited options, re-chain restaurants. There are only two of them here. McDonald's and Taco Time, not the Seattle-based version, sadly.

Fun fact, our Taco Time also serves Filipino food. My question for the doughboys is, if you lived on an island had to choose one or two chain restaurants, what would you pick? Love the pod. All the best. Monica, thank you so much for that context on aquaculture. That is very fascinating. Fascinating. I like that there are people working on the sustainable side.

This is the thing we got into one of our fish episodes. But, like, you know, there's basically factory farming. This is maybe stuff you already know. But there's basically factory farming. I'll recap this for our audience as well. That is the equivalent of like these mass feed lots, but it's for fish. And a lot of them are really detrimental to the ocean. That makes a lot of sense.

Yeah. But let's do, let's indulge this exercise. You're living on an island And it could be in Alaska, could be wherever Could be Little St. James. Could be a little St. James. You're on Little St. James.

They basically said that, hey, we're giving this to you. It's part of the settlement is that, you know, whatever. You end up getting gifted to this, gift of this for whatever reason. You can do what you want with it. Hush, hush. Yeah. Hush. Did he name it, Little St. James?

I think it was already named that. I don't think he named that. It's a creepy name. It's a creepy name. St. James. It's fucking creepy. Yeah, every part of it is creepy. Yeah, yeah.

Except for James, I guess it's okay. I'll say this. I don't care for what he was getting up to on there. Yeah, same here, Wags. Some bad stuff as far as I'm concerned. I don't like the history of that island at all. The whole history of it's no good. I just got sent the Epstein screener.

Let me check this out. It's just up until Epstein moves in. Okay. Oh, right. I was going to math. What an investor. I separate the investor from the investing. Is that what it is?

Oh, investing from the investor. Whatever, I've already said this before. I'm going to pick two pretty quickly. I mean, I know one right off the top of my head. I think it's the same thing. One of them is McDonald's. Come on. You're saying one of them is McDonald's.

Oh, you don't agree. I know why you're too. You know mine. You think you know mine. Yeah. I was going to say in and out. Emma is correct. In-and-out burger is going to do one of it.

them. Oh, wow. I thought about Del Taco, but they said chain restaurants and how about a place where I can sit down

and enjoy myself and also a place with a sprawling menu? One of my favorite chain restaurants, cheesecake factory. Oh, that's fine. Yeah, you got everything available.

You got everything there. Like in a small Alaskan town or so or an Alaskan island. There is an Alaskan island. I don't know, who cares? Well, islands. There's a little islands.

It is an Alaskan island. That's what they just said. And in a small Alaskan island, a cheesecake factory or like a Chili's would be, like that would be the place to be. Yeah, because you get a bar you can hang out at. Oh, yeah. It's the place to be.

Okay, I'll read this from the email again. Ketchikan is a weird place in many ways. It's on an island. So they are an island. When you said a sit down, I thought you were going to say a hillstone. I mean, a hillstone would be great. The thing about the cheesecake factory has over Hillstone is,

yeah, hillstone's more expensive. Hillstone also seems like you're cheating a little bit. It seems like you're cheating. Cheesecake Factory also like that could be a gathering place for the town. People are going to hang out there, I can get the bar. Everything. That they have everything.

I want Mexican food. I can get Cheesecake Factory's version. I want Asian food. I can get their version, you know. It's all of it. It's all there. Randy, I mean, cheesecake factories is fine to be your answer as well. But what do you think?

Well, when I think about this question, because usually we try to be like, what are the two kinds of foods that you could eat forever? It's like when I go there. Cheesecake, I think is definitely the answer because you could have anything. But I like Mexican and, like, Japanese are the two things that I'm always like, I could eat one of those things every day. and I think be happy for the rest of my life. So I would have, I think, I would pick Chevys.

You've been to a Chevy? Yeah, I know Chevys, yeah. Who never reviewed it? Oh, I love Chevys. They don't have it in Burbank anymore. It's really sad. They got rid of some of the South Long locations. Love things.

They had a Manhattan Beach one as well, yeah. Really? I love Chevys growing up Chevys because I made their chips in house, so there's salsa at the table. It's fucking delicious. The first time I ever had avocado in a tortilla soup blew my mind as a kid that did not grow up around a lot of Mexican food. I go with that.

I think I would go with a, shit, what's the, there's like a sushi chain out here. Oh, sushi stop? Is that what you're thinking of? Yeah, I think I'd have a sushi stop. I'd be really happy with those two things forever. We reviewed sushi stop on a podcast. You got some fresh dish there on the Alaska Island. Sushi stop is very solid as far as a sushi chain.

And there aren't a lot of sushi chains, so I think that's a good choice. Yeah, I mean, like, that's what I'm realizing. I'm not going to get any, there might be like a few rolls on the cheesecake factory menu, but Japanese food's going to be hard to come. and that'll be definitely an absence in my life. But, you know, whatever. We're going to be limited. And when an out factory, what it now gets for me,

cheese, not factory, cheesecake factory, and an out burger. What an out burger gets for me is it gets me those, those bites of childhood. Yeah, yeah, that makes sense. I, uh, all right. I think McDonald's. We are in Little St. James. McDonald's, it has to be one of my choices.

Yeah. Just because it's, you're talking, 24 hours, McDonald's is always open. McDonald's is great. There is no, look, everyone has made good choices so far. My other choice is, this is tougher because I'm like, if it was two fast food restaurants, it would be McDonald's and probably now Taco Bell. Yeah.

Those would be the two that I would have there. I would really miss, in the past, I'd be like, ooh, Wendy's is tough. Do I do Wendy's, but no longer. Wendy's is gone. Yeah, 1998 Wendy's and current Taco Bell. Now, let me tell you. If it was, if it was, if it was. If this was 1994 Wendy's and they were in the yellow cups and the yellow fries,

salad bar. That would, that would. And you know what? That's a place to go down and sit and eat. Yokeero Taco Bell era Taco Bell. I mean, hey, that's no slouch. That's no slouch either. I mean, I'm saying, I'm saying probably honestly would replace McDonald's Wendy's at that time.

Sure. But instead I'm going McDonald's and then Taco Bell for fast food. but I think that I would have to make it McDonald's and some sort of like chain sit down place because we're on an island here. And I think since you already took Cheesecake Factory, I think that's the right choice, but I'm going to go Chili's instead.

Chili's a great pick. A lot of fun. And hey, that's certainly cheaper than Cheesecake Factory and more of a neighborhood hang. So even good in the neighborhood. Definitely. Have you guys played Alaska? No.

We haven't. Have you been there? Yeah, I did a festival there a few years ago. Wow. Awesome. Wow. I would love to do. I would love to do the non-contiguous store.

We've been to Saskatoon. That was the most remote cold place we've been to. Saskatoon in Saskatchew on. That's cool. But we've, yeah, we've never been to Alaska. I don't know. Well, maybe we'll go to Alaska. I don't know what we review.

It was really cool. There was a, I met a guy at my show who had just bought 30 acres and it had a burnt out school bus on it. And he told me that he had to turn that into a house by winter or he'd probably freeze to death. And I was like, there's easier ways to live. But I'm glad, like, you seem really happy about your choices, dude. That's wild.

Yeah. I built different up there. It's great. If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email us at Feedbag at birdfuck.com or leave us a voice for a 30-0. That's 830-463-6-844. Have you and I stayed in a fucking igloo up there? It would be fun.

Yeah, I wonder. The Aurora is really cool. I did a tour to go see the Aurora Borough Alice and it was awesome. That would be fun. Me bringing my CPAP into an igloo. By the way, we got down to the bottom of it. There was a tie column. It was a formatting issue.

19 wins. Well, now 20 wins for Mitch. 18 ties. 18 ties. And only eight losses. Wow. Okay. A lot of those ties are me being like, hey, it's a tie.

I mean, today could have been a tie, too, I feel like. Because that was very, you were very on board with it being. Yeah, yeah. And I 100% agreed. I think those, all right, so we'll make this one a tie. This is Mitch is still 1919. It's still 1919. Fine.

Our producers Emma Erdbrink, our associate producers, Amelia Marino, our video editor is Mike Dorfman, Do Boys merch at kinshipgoods.com slash Do Boys. And hey, to get the Do Boys double, our weekly bonus episodes, subscribe at patreon.com slash doughboys. That's also where you can listen to all our recent tour episodes. Those are all behind the paywall. Patreon.com slash Doe Boys. You know, I told you I saw Hokam last night. Yeah.

And I saw, there was this guy who said, hey, Mitch. and he said, I listen to the podcast, and his name was Jack Seaver McDonald. He said, tell him why. I said, what's up? And he's like, I'm the bully on Ted. He's the bully to the son on Ted. Wow. He listens to the pot, a very nice guy.

And we both liked Hocum. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There you go. The Ted bully. Thanks, Jack. Thanks, thanks to the show. Thanks for listening. Brandy Posy, Milkjob is the special.

Please a plug away. Yeah. You can find Milkjob on YouTube.com slash at sign burn this records. Brand dazzle is me on Instagram. Brandazil is here on TikTok. Lady to Lady is my podcast. We've been around for 14 years. I have a show in L.A. called Picture This.

That's comedians paired up with the animators, and they draw your jokes during your set, and it is extremely fun to do. We tour that all around the country and stuff, too. And then Burn This Records is my record label that I started a few years ago to try to make a place that stand-up comedy feels good again. Come check it out.

I'm on Warp Tour all summer long. If you don't like my face, but you like my voice, Milk Job is also an album. Wherever you listen to music, you can also do that. But yeah, come find me. Come say hi. Randy, we met, we were reminiscing in the kitchen. We met many years ago in a sketch comedy 101 class at UCB that we were both taking. It was like that early in both of our L.A. lives.

And it's a really awesome what you build. And I've guessed on Lady to Lady a number of times, a really fun podcast. people should check it out if they're not already subscribing. And congratulations on the special and on the label. Thank you. Hey, you know what? We're both still doing it. We're both still doing it.

That's awesome. Yeah. And like, we don't have too many bodies. No, we don't know. Yeah. It's great. And we know Mitch? That's something?

We got Mitch. I personally think one of you two should hang it up. I'm talking about Wager. Oh, I'll be hanging it up pretty soon. That'll do it for some. like studio audience laughter to there to make it seem less fucking I'll do it for this episode of Do Boys.

Until next time, for the spoon to my Mitch Taylor. I'm Nick Tiger Wire. Happy eating. See ya. Hi, I am Mandy Moore. Sterling K. Brown. And I'm Chris Sullivan. And we host the podcast, That was us now on Headgum.

Each episode, we're going to go into a deep dive from our show, This Is Us. That's right. We're going to go episode by episode. We're also going to pepper in episodes with different guest stars and writers and casting directors. Are we going to cry?

Yes. A little bit. Are we going to laugh? A lot. A whole lot. That's what I'm hoping, man. Listen to that was us on your favorite podcast app or watch full video episodes on YouTube or Spotify, new episodes every Tuesday.

That was a hate gum podcast.