Doughboys - Ggiata Delicatessen with Vanessa Chester

Episode Date: February 19, 2026

Vanessa Chester (@vanessalchester, Napa Boys) joins the 'boys to talk on-set experiences and rank artificial flavors before a review of Ggiata Delicatessen. Plus, another edition of Servin' USA.Watch this episode at youtube.com/doughboysmediaGet ad-free episodes at patreon.com/doughboysGet Doughboys merch at kinshipgoods.com/doughboysAdvertise on Doughboys via Gumball.fmSources for this week's intro:https://www.britannica.com/place/Cameroon/Historyhttps://www.cameroonembassyusa.org/mainFolder/history.htmlhttps://www.espn.com/nba/story/_/id/23396205/nba-pascal-siakam-6000-mile-journey-raptors-stardomhttps://ca.sports.yahoo.com/news/raptors-forward-pascal-siakams-nickname-doesnt-make-much-sense-184226715.htmlhttps://www.restaurantbusinessonline.com/emerging-brands/how-ggiata-brings-bit-jersey-los-angeleshttps://www.ggiata.com/our-story/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. Want to watch this episode? Check it out on our YouTube channel by going to YouTube.com slash doughboys media. Hey, buddy, the dough boys are coming to Seattle. That's right, Mitch. Home of the NFL champion Seattle Seahawks. Well, soon the doughboys will be joining your city to give you a live show,

March 1st, Neptune Theater. Tickets available at birdfuck.com slash live. Home of Fraser Crane. You're mad at that? With our guest, wives, Jordan Morris. That's right. Jordan Morris will be with us. Jordan Morris joining us for a show March 1st in Seattle, Neptune Theater.

It's going to be a lot of fun. It's going to be a blast. We're going to see you there. There might be some surprises. I don't have anything planned, but we could probably have a surprise. Come check it out, dudes. Are you being a Seattle guy? Yeah, like a flannel guy.

Tickets at birdfuck.com slash live. See you there. Wow. Cameroon is a relatively new nation, having achieved independence from its French colonizers in 1960 and their British counterparts in 1961. With a population of around 30 million,

this ecologically diverse Africa and miniature has produced an impressive number of professional basketball players, most notably one-time league MVP, Joel Embed, and perennial all-star, Baskal Seacum. The son of a small-town mayor, Seacom's original plan was to enter the priesthood, but his God-given height and athleticism led him to start hooping as a teen, and his famed work ethic accelerated his assent into excellence.

After entering the NBA as a late first-round draft pick of the Toronto Raptors, the multilingual, entertaining on and off-the-floor emerging star, became a fan favorite and was given the nickname, Spicy P. Spicey P went on to be a key member of the historic 2019 Toronto NBA Championship team, led by mercenary basketball terminator Kauai Leonard. One year later, the COVID pandemic halted the NBA season and also led to an explosion of takeout restaurants. And so it was in 2020 that a New Jersey-born trio

founded an Italian-style sandwich shop in the Los Angeles neighborhood of Melrose Hill. Howard by a widely circulated Instagram of its lovingly crafted and visibly caloric handhelds, the deli outlasted the pandemic and has grown to a half-dozen takeout and delivery-only locations across L.A. and its signature sandwich, a chicken cutlet with spicy vodka sauce, is called the spicy pea. Siakum has since been traded to the Indiana Pacers, where he again returned to the NBA finals and made all NBA.

And he also hosts a playful food-based web series titled How Hungry Are You? But it's unlikely the Cameroonian baller slash foodie would opt to order his signature namesake Sando from this trendy takeout chain. On fellow Raptors champion Danny Green's podcast, Seacom said, quote, I don't like spicy food because I'm spicy enough. This week on Doe Boys, Jada Neighborhood Deli. Welcome to Do Boys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Tiger Weiger, along with my co-host, half-time show performer, a tad funny, the spoon man, Mike Mitchell.

Oh, bad funny. A bad funny. A bad funny. A Super Bowl game that your Patriots lost. Probably did not want to remind you of that. Yeah, thanks, Wags. You're the guy who never wants to timestamp these, but then you could go ahead and remind me that the Patriots lost.

No, yeah, we're unfortunately under the shadow, the long shadow of the Patriots loss, which will linger for a while. Oh, boy, this is in Espaniel. I will try to phonetically get my way through this. And honor al show de mezzo del supertazone, les envio this joda and his Spanish.

It's not cancelable to speak Spanish. Put a canceled stamp on him. I'm. Don't put the stamp on me, Mike. Put the stamp on him, Mike. Mike, don't put the canceled stamp on me yet. Cancellar. It's cancelar.

You can do that. That's fun. I hope. I hope. This is from Alvaraoos de New Yorkerreira. Saludos from Panama. Panama, yeah.

Wow. I got something. This is from Alvaro, our buddy Alvara. Oh, wow. Who included, who's in the DOSCorp, who also included, oh, no, I just realized this roast probably doesn't make sense since you were probably glued to the turning point half time show for political and taste reasons. All right. In that case, ignore my email.

Let me roast now is, wah, a pun on that kid rock song. Also pretty good. All the best from other Mexico, as you probably call it. Okay. Wow, this is loaded. Let them cook. Rosseburt fuck.com. How did you feel about Kid Rock set list?

Did you enjoy it? or no? It was good. I just wish there was more. Yeah. Really let him stretch out a bit. Did you watch the Super Bowl or no? I watched chunks of the Super Bowl, but I was like, the game got kind of boring.

And I'm not a football guy. Did you watch the halftime special? I saw, again, I saw some of it later, and it's a very impressive production, but I didn't watch it live. Some of it later. Toss that canceled stamp on him. Canceled. Nick's brother was in a Super Bowl You've talked about this on the show, right?

Are I talked about this? I think I have. My brother was a marching band drum major in high school. And so when Michael Jackson did his halftime show, it was at the Rose Bowl. And part of it was, I can't remember what song he was saying,

Heal the World or something like that. He had a whole bunch of kids coming out to cheer him on. And so my brother's job was the kids were younger, the kids who were cheering. my brother's job as a teenager was to be one of like a dozen kid wranglers. So he just had his group of kids that he was supposed to bring up to Michael Jackson. So your brother signed up to be a kid wrangler for MJ. Yeah, yeah.

In hindsight, the optics aren't great of that. Nick is the only kid in history to weird Michael Jackson out. That is a very, I mean, I remember that halftime. That's like a very early memory. They had like Michael Jackson clones appearing around the stadium. Yeah, yeah, yeah. impersonators, not actual clones, I don't think. Yeah, well, yeah, I don't think they were actual clones.

Probably more clones. Maybe we're clones. That's like a very, that's like one of my, I feel like that's like a very early, one of my first memories. I have a lot of early Michael Jackson memories. The Michael Jackson halftime show was one of your first memories. That can't be right. I mean, I'm just trying to do the math. It was like, wasn't it like 1987 or something?

No, I think it was later than that. It was in the 90s because there was a teenager. Oh, never mind that. Yeah, yeah. All right. Well, I do remember it. It's possible you started to form me. memories at age 13. It was

1993. Yep, one of my first. I was 11 years old. I was actually 10 years old. That is, all right, so it was an early memory, but I will tell you, I'll tell you like one of my memories from childhood that sticks with me as we've talked about this before is when

black or white premiered after a Simpsons. Oh, right? It was after Simpsons, yeah. And I remember watching that on Fox and it like being such a moment. Being introduced to morphing. Yes, the first morph. And is Tyra Banks is in that video? I think she's one of the more faces.

She's one of the morphers. But there was also Remember the Time. Do you remember when he premiered that on TV? I remember being like, stop everything. I have to sit in front of the TV right now. And then they played that like all summer long. I just remember seeing it all summer long. Man.

What a cast in Remember the Time video. Do you know what I liked that? It was a great cast. Was Magic Johnson in it? He was. I believe he was a Pharaoh. Yeah. I'm just like thinking of Eddie Murphy.

Because he was like, Eddie Murphy was like. Eddie Murphy was like the mad pharaoh. Yes, yeah. Eddie Murphy is one of the stars of it. And then I think Magic Johnson is in the... And then I'm pretty sure Magic Johnson... What's... I'm on.

I'm on. I'm in it. Matthew Johnson's in it. I also like at the end of black or white that it's like a morphing thing. And then they're like, all right, cut. And it's like, oh, wait, we're supposed to believe this one person was morphing.

Do you know what I'm saying? Do you get what I'm saying? I think that, well, yeah, okay. I'm telling you. That's the fiction of how they depict filmmaking. But I think also I guess in that reality, yeah, that one person was morphing.

That's what I'm saying to you. And also McCauley Culkin blows George went I think to the African I think it's to the Sahara, I believe. Yeah. He plays his music so loud and he, and he... I'm glad there was more to that. Because the start of that was really suspect.

I was ready. I was like, I'm going to go watch this show. I got an extended cut of back or why. I don't know if you guys saw it. He blows. George went to the desert. He blows him away. He blows him away. I make that a complete thought

for sure. You know, whatever. You're having fun. Yeah, we're having. We're having We're jester gooning here. And you know what? We're here to talk about, we have a guest here. All right, first of all, I'm going to play a drop. I'm going to get ahead of myself, but I was going to say

we have a guest here and we're in a movie with the guy who maybe rode a train around the Neverland Ranch in one of one of our cast members did as a boy. Okay. That's a little tease. I was like, okay. Hit him with a drop, Emma.

Okay, here comes the drop. You said Jimmy was serving cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt. Jimmy is generally nude. Bark, bark, bark, bark, bark. She's loving her. We know she's a horny southern bell. Jimmy's a bunch of rats. Yeah, that's a fucking murderer.

All right, jemmy is eating the cheese. There you go. Jimmy don't leave us, Jimmy, please. Oh, whome. Jemmy. Keep your head down there's done like. Jemmy. Jemmy.

Like, like, like, talking about Jemmy. Jemmy. Jemmy. Because they can never ever be. Jimmy. Jimmy. I love you.

Aw, Jemmy, she looked up at the end. Did you hear your name? Also, our guest was doing great. You were doing some good work with the... Nice little shimmy. I mean, everyone else usually is just staring dead ahead and then wondering what the fuck is going on. I didn't know what it was.

but I was like, this is giving me like, Vogue, ballroom, like, let's go. I didn't know the rules. That was a good one. No, that you did. Not everyone has to dance after. Wow, okay. No. The new rules of established.

Yeah. Okay, here we go. Drop off submission, like Jemmy. Jemmy for president, Chris Finkie. Oh, it's finky. Finky. Oh, Finky's good. We do things where we do little drops at the top of episodes.

It's stupid. We're sorry you're here. No. Why would you be sorry when I'm not? Well, give us about, give us 90 minutes. You're gonna, you don't feel the same way. I'm like, can we circle back to that question you asked? I'm really weird about it now.

We'll lose you over eventually. Drops to Birdfuck.com. Our guest thrilled to have her on the podcast for the first time. Stars in Napa Boys in theaters February 27th. Vanessa Chester is here. Hi, Vanessa. Hey. Wow.

Wow. We did it. We did it. Thanks for having me. Oh my God. What a treat. The first Napa boy to be. on Do Boys. This is true.

This is huge. It's a great collab. There's, there is, for the movie, we've had, we've had Armin and, and, uh, and, the other director. Yes. I don't, I don't know if, I don't know what Lori we're going with here. We've had bug main and Armin on there. That's right. And I know that Bugman had something to do with the movie. Right. But, uh, but they, they,

there's a rumor that they're banned from the show. That Bugmain and Armin are banned from the show. Yeah, yeah, from our show. But wouldn't you guys know if? they were banned? I was like, wouldn't you guys, like, wouldn't that trickle down from you in a way? But I feel like it would be, it would be like good heat for the movie for them to be banned and we figure out some way to resolve that.

Well, did you ban them? Did you say they were banned at some point? No, I never banned them. They think they're banned. They're not banned. Well. You told them I banned them. I don't know.

I don't think, I don't think. They were like, hey, can we come on the show and you were like, why you banned you? Some shit you made up. I do like to use you as an excuse a lot of the time. Yeah. And I tell you you can. Why don't you guys just go with the, like, their band. thing and then at the premiere you guys have to figure out a way to put your differences aside to get

them on the show. I like that a lot. I think I want that to happen at the premiere. And then we'll surely ban them after they do a new episode. Right. They'll do something else banable and they'll start the next branch before leading up to the next Napervo Boys movie. Armin rode the train in Everland Ranch and Michael Jackson said, I like your ET sweatsure.

He said that to him. That's a true story. I would love that train. It'd been my dream. We do. The Neverland Ranch train. MJ waiting for you to get the fuck out of his house. He's like there.

I would be there at like one in the morning. He'd be like, this kid has to go. She won't leave the train. It's the safe place. That's what I'm going to stay. Congratulations on Napa boys. I have not seen it yet. I'm very excited to see it.

I think maybe by the time this episode is out. And I'm... This is the last week of February this comes out. Yeah. Yeah. This will be out next week. Okay, so right. So right before the release.

So fun. But everything I've seen from the movie, everything I heard about the movie, it sounds absolutely bat shit in a great way. Like, what was your experience doing Napa Boys? I mean, it was so much fun. It was a little bit intimidating because if you know, like, the cast is an incredible ensemble of like people that I, 100% respect Mike included, like, my peers that I love. And then like comedians that have been in this game for so long. I mean, look, I'm going to lie to him because he's one of the hosts. Just like, let me do my thing, okay?

Cut that out, cut that out. No, no, that was good as hell. Just kidding. No, don't. Like, you need to be humbled. No, just kidding. So, like, it's just crazy. Like, there's just so many amazing comedians that I watch and love and just, like, working

alongside them. It's like, whoa, what the fuck? How am I in the same space as them? And then... Well, you have my biggest laugh of the entire movie. I told you that before, and you're so good in the, you're very, very funny in the movie. Let's spoil it. I just spoil the best joke in the movie.

I won't do it. No, don't do it. Can I say, hmm, I don't even want to say anything about it really. No, don't see what you want to say. Mitch is whispering a secret. I'm and Amelia are saying la la la la la while covering their ears. I think you could do. There's a music moment.

Let's just say that at the beginning, when I was dancing, we get to see a little dancing in the movie. Is that where you're going? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. The conclusion is I have rhythm. on the podcast and in the film. You play, I mean, you're so, you're very, very good and funny in the movie.

You're great. You're great. You're great. Here's my question for both of you as actors in this film. Go on. Does it make sense? Oh, does it make sense? You know what?

I'd say more than you think it does. I mean, the answer is probably no in some ways. I mean, I feel like it's one of those things that it's like a spectrum. Right. There are, like, I feel like I'm in on the joke, and there's still moments of the movie where I'm like, I don't understand that. Like, I get it, but because there are so many, I think, films that it's inspired by and it takes from, like, if I haven't seen that film, I don't really get the full parody of that show. Sure, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's some, like, I think what people were talking about was it megalop.

Yeah, there's some, there's a, there's Megalopolis references. I mean, the way I described the movie is that if, if, if sideways had made a bunch of American Pie movies. I'm sorry, if Sideways Continued Day movies like American Pie that went straight to DVD. I mean, I wore my, I wore my hoodie just so you have reference to all of the, they made it now four movies, but it. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was six when we wrap. So this is like how there were the American Pie presents films in the early 2000s that were direct to video.

I'm like going to make you guys see this whether you want to or not. No, please. But this is holding up this hoodie that has all the lists of all the titles of the Napa Boys film. And a little bit of cat hair from Pepe. Pep, wait. That's my cat. Mine's got Wally and Irma hair all over it. So ridiculous.

How do they get their hair everywhere? It's insane. Also, my mom and sister are coming to nightwags at 11 p.m. And hold on, I got to show you. I'm getting rid of all these. What are you doing? What are you doing in your phone? I'm getting rid of all these notifications so I can show this picture of Wally and Irma.

Stop. I've got tuxedos too. They're crazy. They, they're, they're, I love them. How old, how old is Pepe? Two and a half he's a Gemini. Oh my God. Oh, he's a baby.

He's such a Gemini's full name is Gemini. Oh. Is she a Gemini? She's a rescue. She came with a name so we don't know, but we made her Gemini. Her birthday that we celebrate is June 1st. Okay. Wally and Irma are turning 10 this year.

Whoa. How about that? But cats will live, they live a very long time. I already talked to him. I was like, you don't get to die for like 15 years. I already was like, you already know the path. Yeah, yeah. I was like, you will get as many little

like yums and treats as you want, but I was like I got to be at least 60 before you roll out. That's Walling or Am I got to hit. They got to hit 20. Mm-hmm. Or some bad stuff's going to go down. That's just a threat to the rest of the world. So everybody wants to keep Walling Armour alive,

Capit. The cat gods are like, noted. Noted. They need to hit 20 and Mitch, you need to hit 50. I mean, that is a great point. that the cats are, I mean, Wally and Norma are probably more concerned about me than than I am about them. They're a meeting right now.

They're very cute. They're, yeah, they, I mean, right now, I, I, the, my cleaning lady is there. She's great and they're locked up in a room and terrified. Oh, they're so mad. They're very, very upset. What's, what's Pepe like? What's his disposition? Oh, my God.

He's so friendly. Like, if I, like, I don't think cats are, do they protect people? Like, are they known for security or anything? I've got a thing recently that said, Dogs protect our physical world and cats protect your spiritual world. 1,000%. I like that. 1,000%.

Yeah. Like, Pepe just showed up on my door. So I was, like, walking down the street as people do. I saw a black cat and was like, wow, I would look so good with a black cat. That was my thought. Never owned a cat in my life. Two days later, the cat is on my windowsill. Whoa.

What the fuck? So naturally, I go and buy friskies. No, this was his mom jet. And I named it after, like, a crystal. Jet black. Jet and then Onyx. She brought her friend, Onyx. I had, like, friskeys.

And for, like, two months, these two black cats would follow me around the neighborhood. And people would be like, Bruja, because that's witch in Spanish. And I'd be like, thank you so much. And then I came home one day, and there was a litter of kittens on my lawn. And I was like, wait, she was pregnant, but she was so tiny. I had no idea. So now that's how I ended up with Pepe. And my brother has Phil and Lil, his sisters.

And then two of them got into. Oh, my God. I got two to the, like, yeah, it was a whole thing. That's beautiful. It's wild. Yeah. I went from no cats to six. It was not fun.

To six. Well, I took in the mom and the five kittens. It was a fucking mess. Wow. And I was a strike captain at the time. It was just like way, like how much can I carry on my shoulder? Strike captain right actually for the WGA. Oh, no.

Okay, nice. When a cat follows someone home as a cute story. When I do it, I'm a creep. At least you finally get it. God. Where did you, during the, during the sag after WGA dual strike? of, I guess, three years ago now, 2023.

Yeah, because we're about to go back into it. Oh, no. I know, it's super exciting. Everything's so bad. Just constantly something bad is happening. Oh, God. So you're like, but where, because we were all deployed to various studio lots, where were you stationed? I was Netflix.

You're at Netflix. Yeah, I was strike captain there. And then I was like, I'm pretty in, like, in with SAG. Like, I'm pretty in. I was, like, on the strike committee. Oh, wow. I just got elected to the board. Hell yeah.

Yeah, I'm going to like. Thank you for your service. You were saying some good things earlier about how I get actors more involved. And I agree. I love that. Just show up. It's one of those things. Like, it's time.

You have to. Like, all of the studios X show up for their fucking negotiations. We need to do the same. And especially fucking Netflix. Well, I won't get into. I've gone off on Netflix. Yeah, I was like, I don't need to crash out on your podcast. No, I know.

This is, this is. Like, is that the direction we want to go today? I called, I started making. on to Ted Sarandos for a big stretch at some point. And calling him a big red-headed, bald piece of shit, even though he's not red-headed or bald. I was literally like he's red-haired? No.

I was like, who was that guy I was seeing in Deadline then? It is funny to insult someone by making up qualities they don't have. He does. And also, I like a lot of, I have no, I like redheads. So why was I going after redheads? I don't know what I was doing. Kind of reminds me of like a blockhead from Gumby. You know what?

He is a fucking, he is a blockhead from Gumby. That's what he is. He's a fucking blockhead. from Gumbi. They're all blockheads. Suck pokey dick, you piece of shit. But sure, that's exactly the next thing I was going to say. Yeah, blockhead assholes.

Did you say pokey dick? Yeah, Pokey is Gumbi's mate. Oh, Poked from Gumbi. It sounded like you were saying Pokey, like Hawaiian cuisine. Yeah. Oh, that's fun. But I knew what you were talking about. Pokey is the horse.

Okay, so good. I thought you meant Pokey Mon. You've been to Portman over. Wow, so many different pokey, like. prefixes. I just don't have pokey on the brain all that often. I'm thinking about, I think about pokey a lot. I like pokey a lot too. You know what I happened? There was a stretch where I would get

what was that, what's the place that we did the Sweet Finn? Sweet Finn. I would get sweet fin like all the time and I haven't done it in a while. I went through phase where like I feel like all I did was eat sushi and like raw fish and fish and then one day I was just like I guess I've had my quota for life. Yeah. I would have sushi at least like every other day or like two or three times a week and I'm like I don't remember the last time I had sushi now. Maybe I detoxed from it.

My body's good. What was your favorite back when you were indulging? I love a good, like, salmon skin over, like, rice. Like, I just love fatty fish. Like, that, I could be good with that. And then you can, you know, add all the rolls. I love some eels off, saracha. But nice little, like, I love just shashimi, straight-up fish, tuna, all the things.

I'm closing my garage door, just so, just so, you know, everyone knows. Why was your garage door open? You shouldn't even open, you shouldn't even start it. You should have just closed the garage door and come back to the conversation. I couldn't, I shouldn't even, I shouldn't have even given us context. Because when I tell you, I was like, he's probably still just doing something. He's just swiping away notifications. And now I'm like, garage door.

Now I have to know. You're managing properties. The cleaning lady has left, so my garage door is, yes, yes. The easiest day exit, or maybe she was parked in your garage. The easiest exit is right there. Yes, yes. That's what it. That's all it was.

Where's your front door? That's the thing I've never figured out. Why are you asking this question on the podcast? No, no, because I'm just saying, like, when I've been to your place, I've always entered through the garage. And I'm like, you got to have a front door for this place, but I don't think I've ever seen it. Yeah, you know what? You guys have to be careful. I'm going to keep you down in that garage someday.

It's my little trap. I was listening to one of your episodes earlier. Yeah. And you guys were talking about where you record. And you were like, don't get us doxed. It was the, um, La Clomb episode. Oh, yeah. That you just did.

And now you're talking about his front door. Come on. Where is my front door? What type of fucking question is that? The studio address is public. You can Google it and it'll come up. Yes. If you're going to kill Nick and I, come to the studio.

Keep it clean. I feel like you said that in that episode too. They say this on stage. But also, too, who wanted to join a soccer team? I remember someone being like, it was like resolutions. And someone was like, I want to get on a soccer team. Oh, I think that maybe was Vic. Michaela.

Maybe it was Vic, our guest. It might have been our guest. And I was like, did you make it? Like, I remember, I was like, just want to be like, who got on the soccer? You play soccer? I do. Well, I'm trying to get, I want to get a co-ed team together. Like, I used to play when I was in high school.

I played soccer and softball. And I, like, I need to get a certain amount of physical energy out of my body a day. I sleep better. Like, I walk 10,000 steps a day. And, like, when I walk less than that, I don't sleep as well. And I was just like, remember? You do got a lot in common strike captains, 10K a day. Exactly. Like, I just sleep better. I just, whatever. And I was just thinking about it. It was like, I miss playing sports. I miss being competitive. I miss doing that. And I'm, like, trying to get my friends together. We used to have a co-ed softball team and we would play, like, in Burbank. I'm like, let's get soccer together. We don't have to keep score. Let's just, like, run around and be friends.

That rules. But I know my friends don't get competitive. Right. We're in the comedy world and there's so many, but you know what? There's a few people who play. I think soccer is actually probably the thing that's closest to it, but there's a lot of people are dorks. I would have loved to have played like softball at some point, but I don't think I could have gotten anyone from the comedy world to play it. Or anyone. It seems like no one likes it. I don't know. I didn't like it. I think I was on it, but then I was like, why am I playing this sport? I'm just going to commit to soccer now. Soccer is good just for the activity. You're like, like you are getting that physical activity. It's just like cardio, but with, some kind of purpose. Yeah. Not just running aimlessly. You know, the big guy's going and goal, though, you know, that's where I'm going to be. I'm going to be goalie.

No, you'll be, you could be fullback too. Okay. Yeah. I like that. You could be goalie. Also, I'll probably just be on the sideline. You're angling for goalie, because you know you can be sedentary there. I'm angling for the guy next to the orange slices.

Yeah, but if it's a good team, the goalie is doing all the work. Wow. I think that there is something to, when I was younger, running off the field from soccer and eating an orange slice and it maybe being like the best. bite I've ever had. Like that, like, juicy citrus. And my mouth just started watering.

Like a juicy citrus like that when, like, when, like, when, like, when, like, when, when you're running around and craving it, it's, it's, I don't know. That's like, well, Paul Rust has said this before, but like, Paul Russ also in the movie. So, so funny. But, uh, he's like, water, like, if you're, if you're extremely thirsty, water, it can, drinking cold water is, like, the best sensation you can feel as a random being. And you can, like, going through your body and you're like, I'm coming back to, like, 100%.

I would always. eat, I had like a thing after soccer practice, I would get, do you know, like, okay, born in Brooklyn, huge ice cream chuck girl. So any, like, even LA when you can't really find him, if there's like an ice cream truck around, I will purchase something just for funsy. But after school, after every soccer practice, there would be a soccer truck. Do you know those like chocolate eclair ice creams? Like the, trying to picture it. Okay, let me just pull this up because this shit is a bomb, okay? As you look that up, I think Paul did say drinking coal. water, it's better than coming. And I believe that was a full.

Good, good, yeah, I'm glad we got content to that. I don't have, I don't know, I've never, I can't compare the two. Mitch, I get bad news. I can see what Vanessa is doing in her phone. She just opened your garage door. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. That's the whole point. Why you get in there? Check what's going on. I'm like, oh, they're still cleaning. Cats got out. Is it the chocolate declare like the good humor sort of like the strawberry one? These ones. Oh, yeah, I know that. I know that guy. So I would eat one of these and a chalupa from Taco Bell, like, and a Mexican pizza

after soccer practice. And in my mind, I was like, this is what makes me so good. You burned it off. What was I doing? I was just like eating canola oil and dairy sugar and then running around the track. But here's the thing. Mitch and I were matching you or probably well, well, exceeding you

calorically in terms of garbage reading as children, but we're also not exercising. Yeah, we're just sitting here moving our mouse. We're just like playing video games. But I mean, Knuckles burn calories too. Don't... Now you speak in my language. And when you say Knuckles, do you mean Sonic's friend, Knuckles or do you mean your accent?

Like if I could like I had such, how can you have a crush on a video game person? Like I literally had a crush on Knuckles when I was little. I was like, that's my God. Yeah, I would love for Knuckles to beat the shit out of me. Sonic the Hedgehog feels. To protect my honor. Because there's so much like Sonic the Hedgehog like erotic fan art and fan fiction that it's just like, I think it, I think the characters in that franchise. Around 70% of it drawn by you.

Yeah, yeah, I'm responsible for a lot of it. I think it did sexually imprint on a lot of kids. I think they're just like for whatever reason. I don't know. Maybe there is like a latent sexiness. I mean, I see with like Ruse the Bat. The only,

as you know, my only, I mean, we don't know what you're talking about. Amy Rose? I mean, we, I know of these characters,

but like I genuinely know of like Ruse the Bat and Amy Rose because of you more so than anything else. I never, I don't think I ever played a Sonic that Amy Rose or Ruge the Bat were in. Oh, you know, you don't know, SBO the Chameleon.

I do know. Again, because of you. Charmy B. Charmy B. I know all these things because you know the Grintilda

is my video game crush. There hasn't been really another. Grintilda? Grunti. Hot Grunti, as she's called.

It sounds like you're maybe a Sega family. Huge, huge love Genesis. So on Nintendo 64 was where Banjo Kizui lived and their arch nemesis Gruntilda.

Yeah. Okay. See, when I was playing, I think N64 I was playing like, was it Wave Runner? Oh yeah. That was my shit.

That was a fun game. Oh, my God. So, like how... Speaking of Michael Jackson, Moonwalker game for the Genesis. Do you know that? Oh, yeah. Wait, wait, hold up.

Okay, did you just moonwalk? Like, what... There's a level where you're Nate Weiger and you have to corral kids towards Michael. That's the bonus round. I loved bonus rounds. That's the best part. It was, I think Moonwarker for the Genesis

was a side scroller and you were kind of loosely going through environments from the Moonwalker, like, extended short film that was a bunch of... throwing your hat at people, I believe, in killing them. Yeah, you were, like, in the smooth criminal outfit. But the arcade game was more fun, and there were, like,

multiple Michael Jackson's in that and of different color ways. We talked about multiple Michael Jackson's more than once, which is crazy. What's going on today? For, like, one lifetime. Just for one lifetime, that's in fucking sane. We did it twice in, like, 30 minutes, which you have to, like, unlock a special achievement if you do that, I think. I don't know.

You mentioned your... That's video game talk, but there you go. You mentioned you from Brooklyn originally, but you move up to L.A. pretty young and kind of grew up here. Yes, yes. So I was, I started acting in New York, doing like commercials. I did Sesame Street.

Whoa. Thank you for that gas. You got to tell us who, who did you meet? Which, who were, what was the, who was the scene with? Um, oh, I did it multiple times. And it's funny because I was like, they're black girl. Thank you. Like, I remember I did an episode and I'm like sitting on a stoop like with my

big tails like, hell yeah. Like, I'm missing kindergarten because of this. And they were like, in the scene, like, and Vanessa's black. And I was like, like, yep. Like they said my name. And guess what?

And the whole thing was about like different colors of the rainbow. And I was like the go-to black girl. It's kind of crazy because it kind of, it didn't destroy my childhood at all. But like I was on set watching, you know, like two people walk into the snuffalo up against outfit. And I'm like, oh shit. Like snuffel up against us two people. And then I'm like watching Oscar the Grouch.

And it's just like a step. stagnant set and then someone like walks underneath like the trash can and I'm like I was really excited like I was like oh my god I'm learning all like the Sesame Street magic like I was fully game when I was little it wasn't anything that was like mom why I was like you said Sesame Street maga for a second I got very nervous no no they're so they're so mad that they talk about like people existed in many ways I'm like no they've been about it since I was in it because I was the go-to black girl on Sesame Street I love I love Sesame Street I love Sesame Street I love Sesame Street and it does, I think it's now on

Netflix, which makes me sad because it was on PBS for so long. Yeah. But were they, were they, were the performers nice to you and like, were they, like, were they, like, talking to you as a character and stuff like that when they were in there or no? I don't remember. I feel like that, like, I don't think they did

it off. I think it was very much like, I really pride, myself as a six-year-old as being, like, professional. Okay. Let her have it. I was going to say, you're a good job, Vanessa. You're a great actor, but you've always been a very, well, we'll get into this in a second, but you've always been a very great actor.

Oh, thank you. But, like, I was just more so like, okay, cool, like, I'm glad I get to be here. I just was really excited to observe. And everyone was really nice and, like, they played with you. But, like, I think once I realized, like, oh, it's just a bunch of people doing puppets, like, I was like, okay, cool. So we're all just here, like, doing our jobs, right? Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, that's, I mean, that's, and they probably have kids who work in show business a little bit or something on the show or whatever they're used to it. But I remember when, was it us? Oh, no, I think it was the birthday boys when we opened for Triumph, and I saw just a deflated triumph. Is that the Conan's? Yeah, Conan's dog.

Okay, yeah, I was like, wait, I know that. I just saw him, like, sitting there empty by itself, and it made me so sad that I was like, you know, Triumph is just kind of like, yeah, he's going to be, you want him to be alive. I want him to be the guy. But that is a dream. I love the Muppets and I love Sesame Street. Yeah, so started there, and then my manager or agent at the time was like, you know,

we think Vanessa should go out to Los Angeles. for pilot season. That's where like everything happens. I was like six or seven. I have no say in the choices. Like I could be like I don't want to act, but I did want to act. So they were like, let's try this. So the point was to go to L.A. for six months for pilot season. I ended up booking a commercial. Then I booked my first Barbie commercial. And I was like, I'm raised by a single mom, not a lot of money. She immigrated from South America, like very humble beginnings. And I used to like stand in Toys R Us and F.A.O. Schwartz and like, look at toys and just be like, I want that. I want that. It's like trying to figure out how I could save enough money to get that with what job I don't know.

And I remember I booked this Barbie commercial. We go to Mattel. They have this huge store that's just filled with Barbies. And they're like, congratulations on booking your Barbie commercial. Feel free to pick one Barbie as a thank you. And I was like, what the fuck? And I turned to my mom and I was like, mom. Am I going to get a free toy every time I book a commercial? She played it so fucking well. She was like, I don't know. And I was like, say less. Say less.

I literally booked like 11 commercials that year. I literally was like, so you're telling me I get to eat candy, which I'm not allowed to do at home. I get to get toys. I was like, I'm going to book fucking everything. So I did. I booked like 12 commercials in the first year. And like I'm making money, but I was just like, look it all.

I like you going out for you being like, I want to go out for this like a specific toy commercial that you want. Like the toy up. And then I remember like double mint. So do you remember like the double mint commercials or any stick commercial? Oh yeah. Like how they would put the gum in in a very choreographed way. Right.

I remember going on my first gum commercial and they had you stand outside before you went in and do like gum rehearsal so you could learn how to put it in because I guess in like the 90s you had to like look a certain way when you ate gum. Cool. It's true. For all the young people out there. It's true. Homogenous gum eating was the way to go back in the 90s.

And I figured it out and I was so proud of myself. And then I ended up booking a little princess and that was like the first movie I did. And then my mom was like, why would we go back to New York? Like she's like, it's the best weather and it's great. And you have a career. You're being a quick success. Yeah. Also, by the way, can I just quickly say, Mattel, give more than one Barbie for crying out loud.

You know what I mean? Also, you were living the dream. Sesame Street, Barbie. You were knocking out of the park. Oh, yeah. I also booked like a Jello commercial, which I was like, and it was, that was, That's when I learned about professionalism. It was a jello commercial.

And I was just like a background. I was not the star of the commercial. I was just like there. And the little boy who was the star of the commercial, like, was super difficult. Like he just wouldn't do anything. And I just remember the director turned to me. And he was like, do you want to eat jello? And I didn't even think.

I was like, yes. Like I just was like, yes. And they were like, she'll do it. Like they were like, we don't have time for it. We're on set. Like we don't have time for him. Was he crying? or something?

He just, like, wouldn't listen. He wouldn't, like, he just, you know, like... Kind of like me on the Napa Boys, basically? Absolutely. Like, actually, I was trying to think of a reference, and I was like, there's a recent one. It was you. So, Mike.

Also, you on Doe Boys. Oh, yeah, yeah, that's you. Well, I don't want to be here. Nah. Next episode, I'm the new host. Like, that's just how my career... That's how my career keeps on just expanding is that you just take other people's jobs.

Emma gives me a Barbie and I stopped crying. But yeah, that was it. I was like, cool, I got to eat jello because this kid wouldn't listen. There's one there's, okay. So, and there's, and then there was one big role that I want to talk about that you were, you're, you're, you were in, lost world, Jurassic Park. Nick and I, I mean, there's nothing cooler. Yeah.

I mean, that rules. You're, uh, you kicked a raptor in the face. This is, that there was a big moment in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in were you a gymnast? I actually did do gymnast. NASCAR. Okay. That was one of like my extracurricular activity as a child.

But obviously they wouldn't let me do it because they were like, hey, insurance. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But one thing that's great about, besides a lot of things, one of the things that's great about being in a part of the JP franchise is like amazing diehard fans. And a couple years ago, a fan was like, hey, so like, do you realize that you're one of the only people in the franchise to kill someone without a weapon, to kill a raptor without a weapon. And I was like, I was like, run that back real quick. And he was like, you're one of the only humans to kill a dinosaur without a weapon. And I was like, the way I will never forget that

and I will spread that lore everywhere. And I'm like, it's true because I do like, it's like balance beam and then I like kick him. And then, I mean, he's impaled from something other than me, but I kept it class. Still, you, yeah, I mean, I was an accomplice. You killed a raptor, which is also amazing. Also, I think, I was saying this beforehand, but the, the Lost World is a good movie. And I think, I think time's been very, very good to it. I like the first three Jurassic Parks. I think they're all fun. Yes.

I like most Jurassic parks. I think dinosaurs are fun. I'm a world skeptic a little bit, but I like the first three. And the last two I really didn't enjoy the, the Locust movie and then the Scarlet Johansson boss fight movie. Oh, yeah. Do you see the Scarlett Johansson one? I did, yeah.

I was going to be like, what was it about? But I guess it's dinosaurs and chaos. It's dinosaurs. It's kind of, it is kind of back to the basics. They have to like get blood from, or like, serum from three, like a land one, a C one, and an air one. Yeah, that's like a... It's an avatar.

It is, honestly, it is kind of like Avatar. Your Shadow of the Colossus is a video game reference, but it's like it's the, but the thing is they're doing what the bad guys do in Avatar 2, which is harvesting the, you know, the fluids of a, you know, like a rare species to extend human life. Lifefants, yeah, and these are the heroes. Yeah, yeah. It's, look, we were just. I just, I mean, it's interesting.

There's some, there's some okay action in it. I think, I think that, I think that they make. You guys are being so nice. You're like, it's okay. It's got some fun. And like, as you shrug, I'm like, oh, you guys are nice. I didn't, I didn't, I was actually nicer to it than some of it.

I like the second Jurassic world of all the ones that came after. Sure, right. Because it's weird. How many worlds are there? There's three, there's now four worlds. Okay. So now there's more. As someone who's in the Jurassic Park franchise,

I love that you don't know this. It's hard to keep up. They make them too fast now, we were saying. The last one, the Scarlet one, came out on my birthday. And I remember, like, two weeks, my birthday's July 2nd for anyone who wants to get me anything. I'm a cancer. Okay. I remember seeing, like, the promo, like, two weeks before.

And I was just like, there's another one. Like, it came out of nowhere. They promoted it for 15 seconds, and then it went away. Like that's yeah it was it was it was they go they go too fast now they need to take like a 10 year break or at least even even though I don't know time goes fast now so maybe even was that long between the last one and whatever but it was also a huge hit it was like one of the biggest box office successes of 2020 well Jurassic card fans will show up they will yeah yeah that's one of the things that like the most loyal so great so like even out of curiosity

even if they're like we don't care for this I think curiosity they just want to see it see how it stacks up with everything and then, you know. All right, I got questions. Stop, go. One, going back to the last thing, how was the jello you ate on set? Two, was it, oh, two, how was the catering on, just the experience of doing that movie, how was the catering on set of Lost World? Was, did you remember the food being good?

And also, was it shot, where was it shot, Hawaii, or did they shoot some of it here? Okay, jello was bomb. How could jello not be good? Okay. Remember the flavor? It was red. Okay. So I'm going to go with strawberry or,

Cherry. Probably cherry if I liked it. That's my favorite Jello. Do you got a favorite? Let me guess you're a lime guy. Or clear. Do you just like the gelatin? Yeah, yeah. You like plain clear jello? So you just like gelatin? Yeah, just like the texture of it. I just like knowing I'm eating. You're going to pack it to jello and you don't put the flavoring in. You just make the jello.

No, I don't remember. I mean, I think honestly, I think it was probably red as well. I think that's what my grandma would make. That or there was, I mean, orange. Red was the only flavor you liked in. the 90s. Red Kool-Aid, red jello, it's just red. I was a fan of blue, too. I got news for you. Red still... Blue is really elevated. Yeah. Blue is blue? Hmm.

I think to me... Blue's up there. Red is... Red is still king, I feel like, in a lot of ways. Hmm. Is red... Red versus blue? And then what's even next? Green? We're like... Are we talking about just jello? I started talking about Kool-Aid. Like, Gatorade, Kool-Aid. I'm saying like any artificial...

Like, for me... artificial strawberry and artificial cherry are my favorites? No. Strawberry. I love strawberries, but artificial strawberry is whack. But I'm also someone who hates watermelon, but we'll eat artificial watermelon. Well, artificial water, why is it hard to say? Artificial watermelon.

Artificial watermelon. We've literally done this before you said water official artermel. Artificial watermelon. It is another time to twister. Waterfacial artemone. It's like a vocal warm up. artificial watermelon. Because there's way too many syllables when you put them together.

I love artificial watermelon. Artificial strawberry is my favorite overall. And I like strawberries. We talked about this recently, but I'm like, strawberries sometimes just let me down. They just are not as...

They're not in season right now either. Yeah. You know what is interesting is artificial blueberries? Like, who the fuck came up with that flavor? Because they taste nothing like... They don't taste like. They do not, yeah. Like someone was like,

if we just made it a little bit more interesting. It's like the essence of it. I think you get like a smell of it or something and then you're like, oh, they like based it on like a smell it can make or something. It's not, it's not real. I mean, watermelon too is this sort of thing where it's like it's very different from. Or grapes. Like can we agree artificial grape is this so overwhelming?

I kind of like artificial grape. I like loved artificial grape like bazooka and like bubble gum, but like grape coolade. I would be like get that shit out of my face. I forgot orange. I forgot the color orange. That's what I was going to say. Orange. As far as color hierarchy, I think, I think, yeah, orange probably wins.

Red, yeah. Blue, I think orange maybe. Orange wouldn't even be a head of blue. I think is in my, in my personal. Orange might be blue. I mean, blue, here's the thing that's going for blue. Blue has like the glacier freeze gatorade. So there's like a light blue.

Yeah, and there's a fun icy that's blue. There's like a couple good. I'm thinking of the blue raz blow pop now. Yeah. good too. Blue has some good contenders. Red is just so good always. Like, as if red, you're covering red, you're like covering pink and red.

It's all encompassing. I don't know if I might, maybe I put pink into a different view. I might put pink over red. Pink over red. But you're just thinking of pink starbursts, which are incredible. I am. What other artificial is pink? There's, there's a fierce strawberry gatorade, which I really like to.

But I always do like, I always like the pink or, like strawberry or less red candies than I like the dark red candies. Like I like the, yes, this is true. So you would take strawberry over like raspberry or cherry flavored candy. Yes, personally. Where do you put, so we, red can just be a little too tart

for me, I guess. Sure. Yeah. We touched on purple. Yeah. And via gray. I like purple okay. I put purple up.

I put purple maybe above grape, but maybe below blue. Wait, what the fuck? Purple above green, but maybe below green, Blue. I said grape instead of green. Okay, so. Is green one of the, is green on the lower end? Green is always on the lower end if it's lime, I think.

Yeah. But if they try and green apple lit, it can inch up a little bit. That can be fun. It's a little sour, but the- Is yellow bottom? Are we all agreeing yellow is bottom? Absolutely because it's banana or lemon. Yeah, I think I like green more than yellow.

It's pretty shit. I know. Banana Laffi-Taffi is bomb for some reason. I mean, this could be a whole fucking episode. I'm like, the colors of flavors. I was like, do you guys have another, like, like two hours because I could do this. I mean,

I'm here now. Look, don't even open that Pandora's box. We will stay and you'll hate it. But who's the thing is like green apple Jolly Ranchers. Like that's, I'm going with the green apple Jolly Rancher over any of the other colors. Yeah, that's the thing.

Roy G. Bibb, son of a bitch. You've done it to us again. Wow. People are going to really resonate with this. I'm telling you. Oh, I mean, the color. The color, the color rankings are, I mean, like, Let's put it in the Patreon calendar

The color meal Rainbow Bright Rainbow Bite Roy G. Bite Roy G. Bite. Roy G. Bive. Crock. What?

What's the crock about? What the fuck? Like Ray Crock, the founder of McDonald's. Roy G. Bibb, crock. Yeah. Like Ray Crock, but add a bunch of shit. I only like that if we get McDonald's, too. Okay, yeah.

All right, fine. Yeah, we can get McDonald's. We found the arch cards. We found the arch cards. We found the arch cards. We found the arch cards. We found the arch cards. We found the arch cards.

cards, which I thought you fucking lost. There was a, no color at McDonald's. It was like cheese and ketchup. I feel like yellow is, I feel like yellow is maybe the king color of, it's just new, it's just skin tones. It's just beige. It's just different types of beige at McDonald's. It's just cheese, meat, and bread.

And you're talking to people who do love, I, we love McDonald's. I do love it. I've done so many McDonald's commercials. Have you really? Wow. So I'm not, I'm not really an actor and I, I don't, but I did end up at one point doing a McDonald's web ad and I held a picture Big Mac and it was extremely stressful. It was like holding a Faberje egg. And the thing I remember them telling me, I'm sure you have got, we remember some

specific direction in terms of presenting the McDonald's food, but they were like, every time it's pointed at the camera, we have to see three points of cheese. So they're nuts about, like food commercials are nuts. Yeah. Yeah. But what were the McDonald's spots you did? Um, I did one, like when I was younger, where they had this whole campaign where they were like trying to make like slang for McDonald's. And I don't remember what my word was, but the word implied getting the longest fry out of the box. And so the whole video, like the commercial was us being like, whoa. Like so they made some. And it was just like nuts because they've got the people on the side.

They're like, okay, we've got the star fry coming in. And it's like all these fries that are like seven inches long. Yeah. And then I did a coffee commercial. I'd work security for that for the Star Fry. Actually, I remember the, because I remembering the spot, the slang term for the long fry was the reverse Mitch. I was like, wow, he really, I was so gullible in there and wait.

And then I was like, oh. Yes, yes, they called it the reverse Mitch, except girth is perfect. I was having fun saying I'd be the security guard. for the fry. I didn't think it was that fun. No, fuck you. I thought it was sucked. Every doughboy's episode has two points of cheese right here and the left and right.

And then I'll be the third for this one. But yeah. What, you didn't like that? I did like it. He said awl. He said awl. He just gave me a smile. I liked it.

I don't like it. Why are you crossing your arms? I'm not happy with you anymore. Wait, hold on. We got to hear more about why are you crossing your arms? No, no. No, I'm not happy with you. I can't believe I'm in the middle of all this arm cross.

This is so stressful. This is so stressful. And then a coffee commercial. And that was really tough. Which for what company? For McDonald's. Oh. You're just drinking coffee all day.

And I don't drink a lot of coffee. Like, I was out of my mind. I don't think I saw for like two days, like after that. Because they were like, you got to keep on drinking it and drinking. And they just keep on refilling it because it has to look perfect for the, I was out of my mind by the end of that. That's wild. Yeah, it was nice. We've had that with Do Boys episodes where we've done coffee and we get jittery.

I'm not a coffee drinker just in general. Well, I'm like, speaking of coffee, I got myself a cup of Joe here. And to me, it was by necessity. We had Amelia do a coffee run because we ate these big heavy sandos. And I was just like, I'm going to fall asleep during this fucking episode. I might have to go to a bathroom. Okay, we can figure that out. It's fine.

It's shut up, everyone. Okay, you're a human. Do you want to go now? No, I don't care. Fine. It's fine. Okay, it's fine. Do you want to break now?

Now or later? Okay, don't hold it in. I feel like I have to do like a potty song. Potty. Yeah, do I need to go get a Barbie doll for you? Like, Emma? Mitch, do you want to go to the potty? Should we do an intermission?

Okay, you want to take a little breather? Let's do a little... Let's do a dope boy moment. Do you know what? No, I think the moment's past. Okay. I think the moment's passed for now. What the fuck did it just like reabsorbing into your body?

It happens all the time. Oh. It happens all the time with him. It does. You almost shit yourself on the plane. It's true. You're a fellow IBSer. I know.

But you almost... You know what Amelia says, I have to shit. She actually sheds. I just do it. I have to go and then you're like, just kidding. False alarm. I can't tell where I'm at right now. But I want to say this.

Before we do that. I'm just thinking of all the different, like, sayings my brother has for, like, having to shit, like, turtle-heading, like, peri dog. mud butt, like, all those things. That's what happens when you have a younger brother. Touching cotton.

Touching cotton. That sounds like touching your underwear. That sounds like turtleheading. No, it sounds like something that would be nominated for an Academy Award. You should write that movie. Like touching cotton really just like put me on a new trajectory. And then everyone else sees it. They're like, it's like, about it.

Amelia wins in that Academy Award for touching cotton. It's so real. It's so real. Ron Howard directed this. You should write that. And Michael Day did all of the special. All right. All right.

Mitchie, we're going to take a break. We'll be back with more doughboys. Hey, buddy, if you love great food but I hate cooking or cleaning, listen up because this just made my weeknight meals about 10 times easier. This podcast is sponsored by Tovala. Tovala is a smart meal delivery service, fresh meals, and a smart oven that does the cooking for you. Tovala makes it so easy.

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And enjoy life in the high country. And you know what? I got a bottle sitting at my house for whenever Emma swings by. All right, we're back. We are here with Vanessa Chester talking. Napa Boys and Jada today's chain. But before we get to that... Are you going to ask me about how my bathroom experience was?

We're going to ask you that, Mitch. We're going to get there. Okay. Fine. How was your bathroom experience? You know, it was unsuccessful for quite a long time, but then... Oh, Amelia, you put your head down. You were very upset by this.

But then River Dreams came on and Billy Joel sang that turd out of me. Because I walked by and I was trying to figure out which restroom you were in because it was. That's mortifying to me that you were even within a hundred yards of where I was, but you were all right here. Oh, shit. You were

totally fine. Okay, okay, okay. But did you hear Billy Joel through the? I just was like, there was no like green or red on the door to figure out which one was vacant, but the music, I was like, oh, then he's in that one. But then I started being like, I want to know more about this, but then you gave me context. It's a very echoey bathroom

and and so I play music when I'm in there, but it helped. It had some positive side effects this time. I love that. You know, you always do like if you want to like really evacuate. So, I mean. I mean, that's, that's, and here it is,

they got to do something about this damn bathroom. It's too echoey. Look, look. There's plenty of problems with the head gum echo toilets, but Videsa just identified another thing I'm not usually thinking of. The external indicators are not nearly obvious enough. Like, like they only work some of the time. I think they only work sometimes. And only one of them, I think you can actually see the red.

Right. So also, too, if you're going to drop some kids off at the Super Bowl, like you just did, what you need to do is just lay down a little sheet of toilet paper or two, and then you're going to completely get rid of that little plop. If you're trying to get rid of the plop, like what you want, you don't want that puddle. No, that's a good dampening technique. So you just need a put. I need a silencer too. Yeah, that's a silencer. I need some sort of silencer.

Instead of. You drop those kids off of the Super Bowl And they go- Or pubs, drop the cups off of the Super Bowl And the cheer on Michael Jackson. Nate pushes them towards Michael Jackson? He just comes out of the bowl and straight. It's like, why are you everywhere?

How? How? I like Nate, I think that should be the new term is Nate Weiger is escorting them through the Super Bowl. I think that's the better, that should be the new saying for taking a shit. I, uh... Escort the Cubs to the Super Bowl. There is no.

I, uh, I, uh, I, uh, Then a big Italian song came on, and I was wondering, I was wondering, this is the type of song that if you play it at a wedding and there's Italian people there, they go nutty for it. But I know you know it. All right. We might have to mute this. I won't even play it, but Luna Meso-Mere, do you know that one? Can you sing it? It's like, I mean, it's in Italian, it's like, lazy Mary, get out of the bed. Like something that you'd be like, yeah, now we jump in a circle. Yes, yes, yeah, yeah.

Love cultural weddings. Okay, so Vanessa, we were over the break, we were talking about how you have not been able to locate the Barbie commercial you were in that you described. Yes. So there weren't a lot of black Barbies when I was younger. And Mattel came out with a Barbie called Shawnee. And she was like urban and cool and like really pretty. Like I was very obsessed with this doll. I booked the commercial.

It was very like crisscross hip-hop. Jason. Like, I remember being like, she's got attitude. Like, that was one of the lines. And I cannot find that commercial. I've been looking for it for years, for years. Wow. Internet, help me. It's Shawnee. Her name is Beach Street Shawnee. It's a black Barbie. She was cool as hell. My outfit's really bright, and I do a little hip hop dancing in it. Wow. All to action. You nerds? I know, instead of complaining about our episodes, find this damn commercial. Moon Nation Burger Brigade, unite and find this commercial. And then you can complain about my episode.

Sure, yes. You can do it in first. Post it and then put a complaint afterwards, but give us the video. That's all we want. No part before the horse. Find the commercial. Tell me how shitty it was. Like, just do that.

How do they will? Shawnee. S-H-A-N-I. Thank you. That's important. There you go. That's smart. They're going to figure it out.

I can't wait. It's so exciting. Going back to, I asked you how the J-L-L-E was, but your on-set experience for Lost World, where you, did that film here, did a film in Hawaii, and then also do you remember any on set eats? What? I like it.

It's a good question. No, I'm glad that you remembered because actually crafty, craft services for those who don't know, those are the people who provide the meals on set. There's catering and then there's craft service, and that's like the food that's on set all day long. There's just like a table. Everyone refers to it as crafty. What do you like more? Catering or craft service?

Crafty. Like love. I'm a catering guy over craft service. because I'm less of a snacker You're like a meal over team snack Oh I'm team I want to eat all day long Like I want to be like I'm one of those If you're a grazer as they call them

Yes okay cool That felt really right Okay thank you so much Like dear diary I didn't know I'm a grazer But now I identify as a grazer And like that's it from now I'm someone like if you walk into my house

Like refrigerators always stop And like I will judge you if yours isn't Because at the end of the day it's like I should, even if I just want to like open my fridge and just be reminded there's food, like I should always be able to grab and eat something. I like the convenience. Yeah. So I think that's why crafty speaks to me.

And also if you got good crafty, they're giving you, they're basically giving you a little mini meals throughout the day. But you're you're more of a catering guy, I would guess. Yeah, I'm more team meals, but I will like sometimes there'll be a toothsome snack over there at that craft services table and you just can't resist, you know? What are you hoping to see most of all? Um, for me, I all, it's, it's, it's very comforting. I think it's more of a comfort thing when I see red vines. Like, if I see a jug, because I feel like that's always been every single set since I was young, there's always a huge jug of red vines. And I'm like, okay, we're going to be all right. I agree with you. That's like my totem. Yeah. You know what's funny is that I think in the last like seven or, I don't know if this is budget reasons. I don't see as many red vines. They don't do it. And I'm like, I know those are like $10 at Costco. Like, should I just show up with them? I don't think anyone would complain.

Jesus Christ, when actors have to start bringing craft serviced for the fucking day, it's going to happen at some point. After the next negotiations, we're just going to have to actually bring the food and serve it on our break. And happily do it. Like, we're working, yes. I'm paying to be in this, but we're working. I'm acting as a cater and an actor, yeah. Was there some specific stuff during Lost World that you were, like, that you just remember the food being fantastic?

Yeah, I just remember the food. Like, that's one thing that I've learned is, like, you can tell the budget from the food. And even though I was young, like, I can't remember specifics because my brain is not there anymore. But it was great. Like, I was all, like, if they ever needed me, I was hanging out by the craft service table. Like, either looking at gum, I think it's just, like, I've always been a huge fan of, like, buffets and a lot of food. So I think just that much food that I could just eat. Like, you would think that my mom has never fed me in my life the way that I have.

act a brown buffets. Like, Sizzler was my shit growing up. I only liked cruises because of the 24-hour buffet. Like, so craft service to me, I'm like, oh, you've just got a baby buffet. This is my safe place. That's where I am. And you got Jeff Goldblum and Vince Vaughn. Two gum guys.

I think of both of them as gum guys. Why is that? Because Jeff Goldblum choose it in Jurassic Park. Okay. And Vince Vaughn choose it in swingers. Got it. It's like Brad Pitt, but he's like a real gum guy. Brad Pitt is a real...

Brad Pitt's a gum guy. You're questioning the gum guys. And I... No, he was curious. He, I think for Brad, though, like, if you look at Brad, because I text him like that. BP and I, anyway, I think that food is his, like, crutch for acting. Like, he's always eating in movies, whether it's gum or... Like, there's something that he...

There's definitely some oral fixation. And I don't know about you, but sometimes when you're doing a physical movie, movement, it makes it easier to actually do the scene. 100%, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, like, maybe it's because you're, like, distracted, doing something physical, but he's always eating or, like, unpealing a banana. He's always doing something. And I'm like, that's his thing.

I mean, so often when I look at myself at a scene and, like, my arms will be down by myself. I'm like, what the fuck are you doing, you, idiot. But, uh, you need a tick. Yeah. Well, have a little tick you're always doing. And I'm just like, my note. I'll crack my knuckles guy or something like that. You're a toothpick guy.

Yeah. Yeah. He's doing that. He's doing an Edward Chebron guy. He's doing an Edward G. Robinson. You just start fucking, like, fucking crazy. He's like... Our city is that dumb that it probably could just happen.

Yeah, they're like, you're right. No, like, he just had a toothpick in his mouth, and then all these characters popped into my head. Like, that's... Brad Pitt isn't eating... He is, and he's a gum guy. There's gum guys. I'm convinced they're gum guys.

I just wanted clarification. Gum guys. There were two guys... Is this the spinoff, doughboys, and then mini episodes of gum guys? Oh, man. If we, if our two podcasts became gum guys. Just mini episodes, minisodes, gum guys. People are like, no.

If we spot off to just try gum. We did a gum, we did a gum episode once, and people said it was unlistenable. Too much chewing. Too much chewing, yeah. Oh, yeah. And some people, that's like, it's like the end of the world for them. They have mesophonia. I immediately, what?

Misophonia. We've learned that there's a disorder people have called misophonia and that it is real. And it's like, and it's, it's chewing. They get mad at us when we make fun of it. I believe it's real. I do believe. I believe, yes, we were making fun of it, and I do believe it's real to be. We believe it's real.

It's real. It's real to us. It's real to us, damn it. It's not going to be real until I Google it tonight at 3 a.m. That's when I'll know it's real. When I have to open seven tabs, like, okay, fine, fine, fine. I hated, when I was younger, I hated, oh, I still don't like it when someone would bite their fork. So I get.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I get some misophonia stuff. I get it. You don't care? I don't like the fork stuff. Yeah, yeah, see? So there's sounds. I get some sounds.

Nails on a chalkboard. I get it. I get it. I'm with, I'm, like if someone's cutting something on their plate and their knife, like does that squeaky on a, you know what I mean?

Yeah. And I have long COVID, which is the number one thing people don't believe in. So misophonia is second to that. And I want to know that. I want everyone to know that I believe in misophonia. But good food. Big,

Big Stephen's going to take care of the, he's going to make sure crafty's good. Yeah. What was it like working with Steven Spielberg? Oh, yeah, I guess that's probably a better question than how was the craft service table.

My mom's like, how's the podcast? I'm like, they didn't give a shit about anything I did. They really cared about the gum flavors on the lost world, which I don't know why we spent 30 minutes of the podcast on it. We are the two fat asses that if we visited the Jurassic Park, we'd waddle over to the craft service. We'd like, cool, look at this stuff. And there's a giant T-Rex behind us.

I mean, I went trick-or-treating at the craft service. Like, I was working on Halloween and showed up in full-on costume and just took everything from the craft service. table. I was like, these are my rules now. That rules. But everyone was so happy. They're like all adults and it was Halloween and I showed up in costume and they're like, yeah. They took a second to like watch

my costume. Everyone was great. So I met a quick story time. I met Steven Spielberg. The first movie I did was a little princess and he has a daughter named Sasha and he brought her to the premiere at the end of the premiere. It's like, yay, we're doing the meet and greet and the talk

and everything. And he came up to me and like kneel down as like respectable adults while talking to kids will do. And he was like, hey, I think you're such a good actor. I think you're great. I'd really like to have your autograph. And I, you know, luckily I didn't know him as Steven Spielberg, Steven Spielberg. So I was just like, oh, cool, really nice, older guy that everyone's freaking out that I'm talking

to wants my autograph. And as I'm signing, he's like, I'm going to put you in a movie one day. And I was like, okay, sure, you know? Wow. And then three years later, whatever, I get a message, like, DreamWorks would like, to meet with you for the second Jurassic Park. And I was like, holy shit, he was not lying. Like, Homeboy kept his promise.

Well, not yet. I hadn't booked it. First audition was just me meeting with him, like, in his conference room. At DreamWorks. Yeah, like, I just was, like, sitting there, like, 12 and a half years old or something like that. And he just, like, comes. Which, by the way, looks like Jurassic Park.

I was in there once before. It's insane. It's crazy. And he's, like, walks out of another room, and he's just exactly what you would think, like, baseball cap, flannels. jeans, sneakers. And he's like, hey, Vanessa, so what's up? And we just, like, chatted for, like, 45 minutes.

He's like, what are you doing? And I was, like, eighth grade. Like, I'm literally learning about World War II and all of that, which, you know, he's very passionate about. He gave me, like, 82 books and videos on it and was like, learn. And I was like, I will, like, I will. I will. But I was, like, very, like, oh, my God.

And I'm so, like, not fascinated, but, like, perplexed by this moment in history. Like, give me more to read about. And then didn't hear from them and was like, okay, I guess they're not into it. And then they're like, we want Vanessa to come in and do like two pages of sides with Jeff Goldblum. And I was like, okay, like didn't really know who he was. I was like, I thought it was Sam Neal. Like I didn't know which Jurassic Park guy it was. And just me, Stephen, on like a camcorder.

And Jeff. And then we do the scene. And he's like, okay, cool. Now, Jeff, pretend you're a raptor and chase Vanessa around the room. And I was like prepared for everything but that. That's so fucking funny. Jason, have you chewing on his gum? He literally was like, hold on, let me get some devilman, and then he got into character.

But I'm like, wait, like, you know, I'd worked with an acting coach, all this stuff. I'm like, cool, I did the, like, the script part were done, and did not expect that improv. And, like, Jeff is out of his mind in the best way possible. Doesn't even skip a fucking beat. He's literally like, and I'm like, what? Like, I'm like, oh, I don't even get a chance to think about what I'm doing Because Homeboy is the same fucking height as a raptor And it's fully like, imagine Jeff who like just is the biggest kid

He's like he hears an action and he just immediately crouches down, hands up and is like And I'm like, oh my God, I'm actually like this guy is fully a raptor now Like chasing me. I'm like pushing chairs aside and Stephen's just like on the other side of the oval table with his camp quarter like, and I'm like, this is so crazy. Now that I'm looking back, I feel like I was outside of my body watching Jeff chase me around. And then month later-lady-old. Hey, any doughboy sluice.

You can find that video too. I know. That would be, I wonder if it's like in the archive somewhere because that would be incredible to see. Like, I'm sure there's a minute in the video where I'm like, what the fuck? And then I'm just going to be being scared. I'm not going to book it if I don't get scared. And then got it. Steven's the best.

Like, he is really good with kids. The thing that I really love, and I say this in a lot of interviews, is like, he understood, he understood that I was a child, but also didn't treat me like I was immature or didn't have, like, a sense of self or identity. And I felt like I was able to collaborate. And I know that sounds crazy. But as actors, we have strong, I think, visions of what our character is like. We think about it.

And, like, I remember there was a scene where he came out. And he was like, okay, so Vanessa, at the beginning of the scene, I want you to come out and start crying. And I was like, no. And everyone was like, and he was like, okay, like, why? And I was like, well, I don't think that she would cry in this scene.

Like, if she did all this, she's brave enough. She's not going to just start bumbling and crying right now. Like, I just don't think that that makes sense, you know? And he was like, okay, cool, no crying. And I was like, wait, what? I think it's because I, it wasn't like I was just like, no, I don't want to cry. I had a reasoning behind it.

Like, there was intention. Like, no, I don't think that my character would do this. Like, and he was. was like, cool, I respect it. Like, just. That rules. Yeah, he was amazing. So great.

And I ran into him at E3 like a couple like years ago. And I was like, hey, hi, it's me. And he's like, holy shit, you grew. And I'm like, well, you know, puberty does occur. I did do that. It's my latest role, puberty. What were you doing at E3? Oh, I was working.

I used to work event marketing jobs. I don't remember who I was working for exactly, but I was there with some company. Got it. Because you told us before the, the, the, the record. that your brother works in the video game industry. So I was like, oh, okay, there's another gamer connection. I mean, we're very, we have, like, sibling Sundays where we just, like, play video games. It's, it's, we get along well.

What's your go-to these days? I've been playing, I play a lot of Clash Royale. Oh, okay. Yeah, I'm, like, very into, it's really funny how video games will make you delusional because I'm like, I could be an Army General. Like, the way, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I, like, I'm like, I, you're a phone game, are you a phone gamer, most of all? Yeah, my brother actually just.

gave me his switch. And so now I have like all the consoles. He was like, here, he just like handed it to me. And I was like, it's got everything on there. And he was like, and he knew I would get excited. He's like, yeah, there's like Genesis, Super Mario 3. And I was like, wait, all my favorite games was like, I'm not going to fucking do anything for the next month. And he was like, I know, I just got a new one. Have fun. The Switch too, which I got as well. I think that's what he has. I'm like, I don't understand the difference. I just play Super Mario while watching true crime. Living the dream. Before every Do Boys episode, Wiger says to me, he's like, I don't think you should cry this episode.

And I'm like, no, I think I'm going to cry. Yeah. It usually, it'll have. And then I usually end up crying. And then I usually end up bawling at some point during the episode. Well, actually, it already happened. You cried like a baby when you had to take a shit. Well, I got to say that Stephen Spielberg has a great eye because you were great then and you're great and you're great and you're great.

And you're great. And I hope it leads to a lot of, I hope it leads to a lot of great stuff. Yeah, it would be cool. Like, working's pretty sick. I like making money and stuff and being in my chosen career and it working out. You're so good in the movie. I mean, so are you. No, well, no.

You're, you steal the show. Why don't we just do the last 25 minutes, like a compliment off? I just give each other compliment. I was like, I need this, actually. No, but you're so funny in it. Like, it's been a while since I had read the script and I just kind of read my... It's an insane script. They changed some stuff, but I didn't read the whole thing.

I was like, okay, I know what it's about, and I kind of enjoy seeing when it's done, like, oh, I'm kind of part of the audience, too. I had no idea how much your character, like the journey. Yeah, I go through quite a journey in the movie. It's such a journey. It's great. You're going to love it. There you go.

Yeah. Are you Mitch fans? We know there's a lot of you out there. Make sure you see Napo Boys. Are you a wine head, as they say in the movie? No, I'm a liquor girl. Liquor, yep. Same here.

I like liquor over wine. Yeah. What's your poison, as they say? Whiskey. Whiskey. Wow. I love an old fashion. Wow.

Like, so I generally stick to vodka or whiskey. Like I call vodka college water because it's just basically that. Like, it's either like you can't ever have it again or it basically does nothing because you're just that immune to it. But I love an old fashion. Like, it opens up. It gets better with every sip. The luxardo cherries are the fucking bomb. Like, that's the one.

But you can't, I can't have more than like three. This is my issue with, I hang over on whiskey like is like I'm like, I might die. Oh, it's a different world. That to me is, like, when people would do shots of whiskey, I can't do, I'm a tequila. I'll do shots of tequila with you all night long. God, when we were in Chicago and I, I'm not blaming Amelia, but Amelia did want to have a shot of Mallort,

and I did end up having three shots of Mallor. And you were taking half shots, were you? You guys are fucking gross. I had one shot of Mallor. Is that tequila? No, it's like a Chicago-specific digestive liquor. Yes, it's all bad. It's like a fernet, but it's like.

It tastes like batteries. It's great, but I only wanted to do one. And then Wags was like... You said it tastes like batteries. Let's do another one. So I instigated it. Is it like in the licorice world? I think it was Wiggs.

I mean, I believe you. What did you say? In the licorish world? Is that what it tastes like? Yeah, a little bit. No, no, because I like Zambuque and stuff like that, and it does not taste like Zambuca. I think Furnet kind of has a licorchy sort of minty vibe, and I like that. I can have like a molecule of Furnet.

The Lord has like an after taste of like a putrid grapefruit to me. I don't know why that's what it is. It tastes like batteries. It tastes like batteries. It's not good. Sorry, Chicago. And also you, after your third door, you're like, I don't think I do like that. I mean, you were fucked up at this point.

It could have been tequila and I would have said that. Three shots is a lot, no matter what. Yeah, I'm just not, I'm not a licorish girl. But there's like a whole thing about licorish. Like, it's like licorice, fennel, capers. Like, I don't like any of those things. Like, capers are so dumb. My dad, I don't love capers either.

They're just like rejected olives. I don't, wow. My dad would, my dad would hide black jelly beans in his underwear draw. Unless they were little turds and he was just covering it up. Just dropping. Who's touching cotton as Emilio would say. But that's the thing. I was like, none of us like black licorice.

Like, it's not. It's generational. It is a generational thing. My mom likes black licorish too. but yeah, I've never been into it. But I do like Fernette. I got to text her mom back. Malord is, what's that?

I got text your mom back. Yeah, do it. She texted me. I forgot to text her back. What did you text you about? I don't know. That's private stuff. Nothing to hear about.

You don't know her as well as he does. I mean. To know about the conversation. It's getting close. Yeah, you don't know. I'm sorry. I, uh, your mom texted me because she, she said sorry about the Patriots. She was actually being nice about.

Oh, yeah. So you guys were talking. You, you, you, you, You were going for the Patriots? Yes, but to be clear, they're called the New England Patriots, and this is long before, the name of the team I can't control. That's all I want to say. That wasn't even like my, like, the name was not the thing.

I know you didn't, like, it was more about, like, everything they stand for. I'm just surprised you haven't already inferred this from Mitch's physical form as a caricature of an Irishman. Wait, you said you were from. He's from Boston. You're from Quincy, Massachusetts. I'll club you're bloodyheaded. I'm from the Boston era, so it's Patriots country. I love the Patriots. You're wearing a Boston Celtics hat right now. I did, I mean, I loved the Celtics when I was younger, but it was just because I liked Kevin Garnett.

Oh, sure. I just thought it was super cool. But he also reminded me of Earthworm Jim. Remember that video game? Yeah, I certainly do. I never made the connection between KG, the big ticket and Earthworm Gym. But now you never won't. Makes a lot of sense. I like it. And also, he's a good actor.

Maybe he should be the... My brain works in a very odd way. Makes sense to me. Sometimes I say it out loud and it makes sense other people. After uncut gems, put Kevin Garnett in the Earth Worn Jim live action movie. It's true. Did the Earthworm Jim creator, he was bad? He's bad, right?

Didn't it turn out he was bad in some way? I think he is. I have so much stuff to Google tonight. I don't know if it was bad. I think Earthworm Jim creator is bad. I think it turns out he's bad. Here's a question for you. They should put you in Jurassic, the new Jurassic World at one point,

when Goldblum came back. You should have had made a cameo in there. Yeah, you know, that would have been cool. It would have been cool. I think that would, I think the, there would have been a lot of fans who would have liked that. Yeah, the hell of yeah. I get a lot of messages about, like,

it's the best. Like, I probably get, like, a DM once or twice a week. Like, why won't you be in another Jurassic Park film? As if any actor gets to decide what they're in. And I'm like, oh, that's so cute. Well, I'll put it out there just like you were going after the toy commercials you like. I had a whole idea for like Kelly coming back and like basically, you know, her prime on the island scarred her.

She kind of like follows in her father's footsteps and she goes into like ethical like DNA and genetics and like all of that. Like there's so many worlds that I just, she could come back. It just. And it would be the easily the best Jurassic World movie there was. I think it would just be so great if they had Kelly come back and with her dad. Like just the banter of the two of them. could be so much fun.

And here's the thing. If Kelly's going to be a successful scientist, she's not going to need an Igor. Get Mitch in there. You piece of shit. I was like, oh, what's going on with the plot? And I was like, oh. So like the universal monster Igor,

it is a universal property. Yeah, well, there you go. So I would be like, hmm, like I'd be like. That's good. No, that's good. That's a good audition. Can't wait for Stephen Spielberg to have me act like Igor in his room.

You get an offer on Monday. And Jeff Goldblum chase me around like Frankenstein. You're going to get an offer, watch. Offers only. What's the story, the story you told about Lost World was incredible. But what amazes me there is like saying that like, I'm going to put you in something is just like so often such an empty promise. And then three years passed before it actually happened and he lived up to it. Yeah.

I have. What's, I have all of my like journals and, like, diaries from when I was younger. And like, it's in my journal from when I'm like nine. And I wrote in it. Like, I met Spielberg today and he said he's going to put me in a movie. Like, I have that written down. It's nuts. It's nuts. The FBI has most of your journals, right? They're manifestos, Mitch. We're talking Jada today. Hey, also, by the way, you're going to see his new one this summer, Spielberg's new movie this summer? He's got a new alien movie coming out the summer.

I feel like I just learned about that, but what is it called? Is it, it's invasion or something day? Isn't it like a, something day? Something day. Something day. Something day. No, it's not, Disclosure Day? Disclosure Day.

I wasn't far off. You weren't far off, but Declaration Day. Disclosure Day? I knew Declaration Day was wrong because it's a bad title, but Disclosure Day. Disclosure Day. It's like, it's like where like you learn that aliens exist or something. It's like what the, is like. I don't feel like Disclosure Day is a great title.

Steven? Steven. I'm like, here goes my chances up being in the next stress. She's got too many strong opinions. He's listening to doughboys on the peloton's. He's like, oh, fuck. He's like, I was going to give her another chance.

But I will cast Mitch as Igor. All right, we've got to get into our, we got to finally talk food here. Jada, Italian sandwiches is what we're talking about today. Jada Neighborhood Deli is its official name. Before we started, you had a take on Italian food that I thought was interesting. Oh, man, I'm about to get so much great DMs. You don't have to tee it up.

Why are setting you up here? No, I'm into it. Let's go. I set it. It's out in the world, ten toes down. You want to replace you in Dress of World? I might be polarizing unpopular take, but I think that Italian food in America is better than Italian food in Italy.

It might be what I ate in Italy. I know that I am the variable, but I remember not being as blown away by Italian food as I expected myself to be. Wow. As a supporter of the Patriots, all I can say is USA, USA. I think that there's something to this. I mean, I think that you also, like, there's bad food in Italy. You know what I mean?

There's a lot of bad, there's a lot of shitty food in Italy. and I've had a lot of great Italian food in the United States of America. You know what is? I'm a big seasoning person. Like my parents are Caribbean, I grew up on like curries and dolls and like really intense flavors.

Yeah. And I don't even need it to be intense. I just like flavor. Like I want a little bit of salt or pepper. And some of the places I went to like the mozzarella, beautiful, the meat, everything is incredible. But like I want a little like sauce. I want a little like juice or something like that.

So I know that maybe the places that I was picking might not have been the best. Like when I went to Spain, I was like, I think of the food in Spain like every day of my life. I, I, I, I had some good eats in Italy. I'm not going to lie. I think it might be me. I did, but also I've had a lot of great Italian food here. And I like, we were saying before, we like this stance.

I like the day. I've never been to Italy so I can't speak to that. But I mean, like, I, I think it's entirely possible. You'll never go to Italy. Because you've never, he's never crossed ocean. But Italy, like, is Italy even on your list to go? But you've never left America or? I've been to Canada and I've been to Mexico.

So you're just chilling in north. Yeah, I've never left North America. In Hawaii you went to, which is kind of- I did go to Hawaii. It's almost, I mean, just as far as like going over the ocean. Right. Wait, question, is this, you don't want to? Like, what's the-

Little of that. I'm not a big traveler. Can't leave the country. I can't leave the country. Clostrophobia on a plane. And especially, yeah, but I mean, like, I'm, I mean, I struggle with it even when we were like, flying to from Chicago. but I think over an ocean,

there's something about that conceptually that really stresses me out, and I think it's like a mental block I need to get over, but you don't have to. Lost, a fear of getting a lost situation. Wait, wait, say that again? A fear of getting losted, like ending up in a lost type scenario. Or cast awayed.

Or cast awayed. Would you? Or send help. But are you okay with a boating? See, that's a thing. I'd be interesting, because I have gotten seasick when I've had a boast before, but it would be, like, if I could get on a long sea voyage,

Crossing the ocean, that sounds kind of fun. Where do you get Captain Phillips? It's just the idea of like being over water. Right. Yeah, I think it's the idea. And I know it's like it's irrational, but phobias are irrational, you know, so. No, because you're like, oh, me, a person without wings up in the air. Right.

And that down there. Like, we know how gravity works. Yeah. It's not crazy. Like, I'm just always like, I'm like, I'm going to go out. It's like, I better die immediately. But I also like have like survivor DNA. so I don't think I will.

I'm afraid of dying all the time and I also for whatever reason think I could survive in situations like that and I don't know why. I think my brain just thinks like I'd be all right. You know,

I probably would be fine. I have a feeling I would survive if like the world ended and they were like 50 of us I'd be like fuck. I don't know where that weird confidence comes because I have no other confidence

at all in my life but I think I would live. I already know. I think it'd be killed immediately or have a chain around my neck. I don't think there's a world where I'm like thriving in an apocalyptic waistline.

I don't think I'll thrive. But I think I would survive. Like, it would be like, who made it? And I'll be like, oh, shit. I made it. And now I got to repopulate the world with my green thumb. Like, I know what my role is if we have to rebuild society. Like, I'm going to plant stuff.

Yeah. Oh, wow. I'm going to provide, like, I'm going to get us groceries through the ground. Wait, you have a green thumb? Oh, hell, yeah. Wait, do you grow your own food, your own herbs? I love growing. Like, right now I'm trying to.

It's like attempt number 300 of growing an avocado plant from a pit. and we've got like a little root right now. It's been like four weeks. But I also think that there's something really great about growing your own food because the ease and commoditization of grocery stores has us very disconnected with food. We don't understand how much it takes to get that orange to there. Like it takes 16 gallons of water to grow a single orange.

16 gallons of water. Yeah. No wonder where they're so juicy on the sidebox. I mean, they just absorb all of that shit. But then we, like, throw away things so easily. So I'm like, I don't know. Growing food is, it's also really nice when you, like, are making, you know, like a recipe. And it's like, get some oregano and this and that.

And you're like, oh, I literally just have it in my backyard. Let me just pick some fresh herbs, you know. You would be good for the apocalypse. I have no skills either in that way. So I'm not. You'd make us laugh. There's you go. Yeah, I'd make you laugh.

And I'd get you the, I'd get you the comfiest chain I could find. And it was, I'd have a little tag that said, Wiger on the bottom of it. We'd decorate it. You'd be out there jester gooning. I'd just be plain old gooting. Emma, Amelia, how do you think you'd fare in an apocalyptic scenario? Man, if I was keeping you as a pet and I had to wake up when you wake up to take you to go to the bathroom. Like, if you were my dog and I had to fucking take you outside at whatever, 4.30 a.m.

Not that early. You wake up, he's a 5. You wake up at 5 a.m. a lot of the time. I sometimes wake up at 5 a.m. What time do you go to bed? Usually pretty early. I mean, I tried to have my bedtime as be 10.30. Oh, God.

That's so amazing. That's like real adult shit. Yeah, I guess so. I don't know. Uh-huh, yeah. But I'm going to bed the same time. I've literally never been able to do it in my life. You never seen the podcast, but...

That's... I woke up. I went to bed even late. I went to bed very late last night. I don't even want to say what time. I fell asleep watching, who knows what, woke up at like 12 and was like, okay, cool. Made some cookies.

I'm not joking. Made some cookies. Played with my cat. Watch a true crime. Watched a little bit of the Olympics. Did some dishes. and then set the dishwasher and was like, great, everything will be ready when I wake up in the morning. You've never, you've listened to the podcast, but you've never seen it.

Nick will put on a nightcap at some point during the episode. I will, yeah. And I'll get a little candle on a plate. Yeah. You mentioned cookies. What kind of cookies do you make? Oh, just chocolate chip, like, straight from, like, the roll. Like, I...

That roll will get the job done, though. And I've also, I've been... I've eaten so much cookie dough in my life. I don't know how I haven't died. Like, I've eaten so much batter and dough over the course of my years. And like, so I get like a big roll. I probably eat like at least one spoonful of just cookie dough before I actually make the actual cookies. I made four large cookies done, ate one on the way here today.

One's left at home for later and another dough. Like I don't know how to make them from scratch yet. But once I figure it out, it's over for you motherfuckers. Cookie dough and buffalo wings are the two things that make me feel very old. I can get there on. I thought you even say you like them together. And I was like, that feels like indigestion. Those are the two things that I've seen the rise of in my lifetime.

Like I know Buffalo wings were invented. Oh, you cookie dough. I was going to say, like, because chocolate chip cookies, there's no way that's the case. No, not chocolate chip cookies, but like cookie dough, ice cream and things like that. I saw those explode. You saw it too. Yeah. Buffalo wings and chocolate chip cookie dough.

I'm like, that makes me feel old because I think to most people, they were around forever, which they have been around longer than the 80s and 90s. But in the 80s and 90s, you saw like the explosion of them. That's when, like, Buffalo Wild Wings was coming to prominence. Wingstop comes a little bit later, you know. I remember having, I've said this before, but I remember down Cape Cod having a Buffalo wing for the first time and be like, what is this? This is good.

And that is like an insane thing to think about. I can't remember which pizza chain it was, either Pizza Hutter or Domino's. But I remember one of them specifically adding buffalo wings and that being a huge thing. I think it was got to be, got to be domino's buffalo wings. Yes, yes, yes, yes, that sounds right. I'm like, I don't remember a time where I wasn't eating like, but maybe are you like specific to Buffalo? is like that this is that like i'm in the north i was like i remember eating wings like all the time i was definitely i was definitely eating wings but i think i think what mitch is speaking to is the idea of it

being like kind of a lot of it was like buffalo wings is like bavowulfow is like buffalo right in those places in buffalo right i don't think it's before that though i think it is 60 70s that the wings came about and then in the 80s i remember eating my first wings and reaching mainstream awareness also we're both from southern california and you're from no i was born in brooklyn oh that's right that time i think about then yeah like i remember when i was little like it's also funny how like when you're younger you're like there's only three flavors of ice cream there's vanilla chocolate and strawberry

and then like cookie dough came out and then cookies and cream and I was like we're putting cookies with ice cream now guys like Ben and Jerry they're my heroes they're so huge they create two pints in my

I'm the chocolate chip cookie dough is that's their invention I'm the person who buys cones and ice cream and makes myself cones at home like Wow. And my mom's like, that's so cute. You're like trying to save money. I'm like, no, this has nothing to do with money.

This is all about convenience. Like, I want an ice cream cone and I don't want to leave my house to get it. I never realize how doughboys coated you are. You ate a cookie before you came here. You make your own cones? Oh, God, no, I don't make my own cone. No, oh, yeah, I guess, yeah. I thought you were like, she rolls them out and makes me raw.

It was like, no, no, no. I'm buying a 12-pack stacked. I can't keep ice cream in the house, but I envy you. Because I just, like, love ice cream. It's my favorite dessert, and I will just eat all. That's why you just make a cone. Like you have to, like, you make a cone, and it's like, you can make as many scoops as you want because you're an adult and it's your life. Right.

And so I usually do, like, two, like, flavors because we want fun. Man. Generally, vanilla-based. Like, I love a vanilla-based ice cream, chocolate-based if we're talking cake. Just wanted you to know that fact about me. I also going to say this. You bring chocolate and vanilla into the color tier that we were talking about earlier. Well, it would just be brown and white.

So, well, I mean, but brown and white. those are pretty, those are pretty strong. I mean, for me. Well, are we thinking them in terms of candy, or are we thinking in terms of all, like, pan flavors? I think pan, I think all over the board. Well, that's, to me, a different conversation. Well, now, hold on.

What do you mean? Because now we're thinking, like, we're throwing, we're comparing a Jolly Rancher to sour cream. Like, what are we doing? Okay, no, you're being out of control. Oh my God, ill. I didn't even think about all the things white could be, like,

maynays. Yeah. Rice? There's a lot of things. I guess what we have to do, since I'm part of this color key, like, we have to make a color key. It's like colors are obviously flavors.

But brown would be, but pudding would be brown. Like, if you're talking about like, right? If we're talking in terms of jello, if we're saying, it can still fit into the conversation. Yeah, but also, brown would be Coca-Cola. I mean, that maybe raise it to me to the top of the fucking tier list. Coffee? Coca-Cola.

I don't drink coffee. Oh, my God. I only drink cactus cooler. Oh, hell yeah. That boost jello all the way up then. A cactus cooler. I like, I only drink cactus cooler and ginger. trail, which is so

stereotypically black of me, and I'm fine with that. I saw you sneak a fanta earlier. Like, hello, orange soda all day long. Like, yes. Orange soda is great. The experience you had with sushi and oversaturation is what I did

with cactus cooler when I was younger, because I was having a cactus cooler like every day, and then it reached a certain point is like, I'm just kind of having this too often. Like you had your quota for the lifetime. Yeah, exactly. And I'm just done. I have that one years.

Orange soda shoots orange so up the list, too, by the way. Wait, say that again? Orange soda shoots the color orange so far. up the list. Huge, huge. I feel like you'd have to do like a drinks category, a savory category, maybe a sauce category. But I do kind of like... Don't you dare even bring sauce into this sauce? He's the sour cream and I was very passionate about sauce. I will fight you.

No, I love sauce. I'm saying it needs its own category of colors. But I do like the fact that if you have all the categories, it makes it like the stakes are so much higher. Like it's so much higher. Because once I didn't even think of pudding. Different colors are going to be in different categories. I didn't even think of pudding, but then it's also like coffee. Yeah. I'm such a chocolate dessert person. I love a chocolatey dessert. So that puts it pretty high for me.

This is allowed to be a follow-up episode. We'll do, we'll figure out a name for. Let's talk about these stupid Italian sandwich so Emilia doesn't get mad. What? What color is Giata? You know what? I would say red. That's a red and beige.

Is this the first time you guys like agreed on? Ever? In life? Maybe. What did you say? Red. I think you're wrong. Okay.

So. So it's, it. Jada was founded in 2020. There's six locations, sandwiches and wraps, pretty simple menu, and it is takeout and delivery only. I had it for the first time during the pandemic. Vanessa, you've never had this. Today was the first time. And Mitch, you've had this before?

Frankenstein's a hunk now, too, I'm just realizing. Yeah, there's a hot Frankenstein. There's a hot. You called me Igor earlier, and then Santa's a hunk, and now Frankenstein is a hunk? Who's the hunk that's Santa? Oh, yeah. Well, Jacob Allerlore is Frankenstein. I just watched that.

Oh, there's so many hunks that are Santa. They cast all buff guys at Santa now. Like, as if Santa gives a shit about being. rebranded. That's so... J.K. Simmons was recently... He was above Santa. Oh, yeah. And now they... Oh, my God, the Travolta Capital One commercial is so not it. Yeah, yeah.

I don't know what... Every time it... I don't even know how to classify that one, but that is also... It's infuriating. It's so not... We didn't need that in 2025. Anyway. No, no, there's a lot of... Santa is going old... Santa, they're just... They're being very loose with the casting of Santa's in his...

Is hot maxing era or does it look maxing air? Look maxing? Wait, who've had Jada before a few times? I've had Giata, I've had a Giata a few times. And back here, back at the dais, first off, how would you feel like you'd fare in an apocalypse scenario? I think I would kill myself. You think you'd kill yourself.

Really? I think I would survive because same, I feel like I wouldn't want to be there, but like there's something in my instincts that are like, no, girl, you're going to be there. But I don't think I'd want to be there. No, I don't think any of us would be like, yeah. I would be like, yeah, I want to like fix the earth. It's like, no, just the beam me up. But I think I would probably be like outside growing stuff or something.

I also have like a little hydroponic garden in my office. Oh, really? Yeah, I have oregano. Oh, oregano. Interesting. I'm growing. Like, it's, it's not weed. I did think about growing weed in it.

I was actually thinking of putting weed in my emergency kit. If the vegetables, that's actually such a great idea. But it was, it's not more. It's not for me because like, it's like, imagine the world is done and you're high and there's no food. That sucks. That does suck. But I was thinking for. bartering cigarettes. Like I was like, I was like, I'm going to put a pack of cigarettes and some weed

in my emergency kit. Because I was like, right. I was like the way that people would be like take like take my whole cow. I'd be like we got milk y'all like for a cigarette. So yeah, there's that. I thought this through. I really am into end of the world like apocalypse shit on our commune. Sure can't. Maybe maybe that's assuming that the sun is still out. That's true. It's nuclear winter. I don't know. Me and Nick just standing outside of your ice commune, not getting let in. I mean, women would take over. It would very, like, the world would end.

It would be very quickly a matriarchy. Like, very, we'd be like, finally. Yeah, that's about time. And I'd be like, go, ladies. Yeah, you're on. I'm an ally. He's like, running. He's like running.

We're like, chain's not long enough. Get back. Get back. Emma, you'd never had Jada before. No, I've never had it before. And Amelia, you said, let's see if I have the quote here. I have a lot of thoughts about Giata. Yes, that's correct.

You're seeing a man, I feel like a woman for the ladies when they took over? Yeah. Let's go, I'll give the next line. So, okay, so we got to get into this because you started side texting, Mitch. Who initiated this? We decided. It was mutual. So you're frantically side texting each other while we're eating,

seeing if you were on the same page with Jada. We said we have something to say about Giatta. We have thoughts on Giatta. Yeah. And you guys couldn't keep them in. We didn't want to influence anybody. Yes. But you wanted to see if your thoughts were the same.

Yeah. Can we get any of the transcript or do you just want to loosely recall? What if we say our thoughts first and then see if it reflects? Great. Because what if it still affects us? That's a great point. I agree. Smart thinking.

Here's the thing about John. I've had, the first time I had it, it was because they were getting, we kept getting the fucking Instagram ads. And I was like, fuck, these sandwiches look. so good. And it was during the pandemic and you get nothing to do but eat. And so we were like, we ordered them. And I remember getting them. No, actually, I went to pick them up because I thought it was a restaurant. And then I went there and it was a ghost kitchen. And, you know, it was like going in the evidence room of a police station. It was like really industrial and really like, and so. An experience you're familiar with? I've been in a few evidence rooms. And, and, and,

but I brought the sandwiches back and they look so fucking good. And I remember biting into them, be like, okay. And I feel like that's, but perpetually my experience with Jada is that I have a lot of anticipation for and then I get it and I start eating it. I was like, all right. You know, like, I'm not saying it's bad. I'm just saying like it doesn't knock my socks off in the way I expect. Because you eat with your eyes first and my eyes are watering.

But once I start, once I actually like put my mouth on this thing, I don't know. I was just like, okay, this is a good sandwich. I have a thought on why this happened. But I would, but I said, I'd love to hear your thoughts on. I'm a big sandwich girl. Like my friend literally got me a book that is a chapter book on sandwiches. It's like breakfast sandwiches, lunch sandwiches, dinner and dessert sandwiches. Wow.

That's the chapters. It's fucking great. Love a sandwich. I, this is not my favorite sandwich. It's not bad. So I had the spicy pee. P. We all, we all.

Which sounds like a really shitty rapper. I had the spicy pee dropping in November. Okay, cool. So that album. I had the spicy pee, which flavor-wise, good. You know what I think? Like a 2001 rapper. Right, right.

Yeah, spicy pee. Yeah. You're like, oh, you use Auto T-Pton. That's really new. Cool. You know, T-Pain tight. I, and then I also tried the caprice. And the Philly sake.

I just wanted to try all of it. I tried all three. I think the issue is the bread. Wow. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Wow. Stop, no way. That's why I knew I was like, just let us say what we have to say quick.

Because, okay, as someone who loves a capricet, that is not, like, the capricet is already, it's not bland. Like, caprices are so delicious for its simplicity. That bread takes away from the caprice. It's like the sesame, it's too, like, it's too fibrous. I need, like, I need, like, water. It's also a little hard to bite through. It's very, like, it's, my sandwich, like, spluted because I couldn't bite through the bread. But the issue is.

I think that that style of bread is very good, but it has to be crisper. Let's describe the bread for, because, you know, a lot of those have that. It's like a braided roll. It's like a sesame braided roll that you want it to be actually crispier than it is, but it's kind of like spongy. It's a little bit spongy in a way. I think it's the like surface area. Like it needs, it needs to be like there needs to be more bread.

Like since they're like tiny, it's like, I don't know because it's like, I'm thinking crispy, like would Crispy help it? I don't know. It's like you try to bite into it and it's almost as if it's stale. It has that. It needs crisp. It has too much gris. You have to rip it apart with your teeth in order to separate it.

Like I was struggling to cut through it with the knife, get through the bottom piece. I'm fine. I think I'm okay with that. Like I'm okay with like a little like, oh, I'm like an animal texture type thing. But like that was like when I tried the caprice, I was like, oh, the bread is what threw it off for me. Which it wasn't as. Oh man, on a vegetarian sandwich sandwich. especially.

Exactly. I think that's what it is. I think the bread is so powerful, like, standalone that it would need more blander flavors inside of it for it to stand out. But it was, like, too many stars. I didn't like the Philly Cheese Steak, though. Like, I didn't like that at all. It's too, it's too.

The Philly Cheese Steak I thought was just fine. It was a seasonal item, and I thought it was a fine execution. I think the spicy pea is not a bad sandwich, but it is that sponginess of the bread. So, Amelia and I was like, she was like, I think it's going to. think it's going to be the same thing. And then she immediately wrote, East Coast Stolen Valor.

And I wrote, the bread isn't what I wanted to be. And then she outlawed. She went, it's the same thing. And I was like, what the fuck are you talking about? It's not the same thing. No, because in my head, I was like, if the bread isn't good, you can't market yourself as like an East Coast.

So you go in, at least the Melrose Hill location. And it's, she sent me pictures. She sent me pictures of the Sopranos pictures. I like that. So they're really going for that like Jersey deli vibe. Yeah, Jersey deli. The founders, the trio. Carmelo Anthony on the Knicks, there's like a box set of that, it looks like.

Giants merchandise. I just say that the three founders are from New Jersey. They're childhood friends from New Jersey. They better get better bread then. I was like, but that doesn't mean that it's good. I'm from New York and I can't make a Philly cheese steak. No, I'm just speaking to the stolen valor aspect of it. Like they do have a Jersey connection.

Also, it feels like my. Matu is doing like a big, and they do cheese. I haven't been to Matu, but it's a big popular cheese steak place out here. They do the braided rolls. They do it, but everyone loves the braided rolls for Matu. I got to try it. It's too spongy. I think they need to be crispier.

I followed up, I said, I texted Weiger sucks. And then Emilio wrote, yes, in capital letters. I agree. I was talking about the bread. It just came at the same time as that. And if your bread isn't on par, you can't do East Coast stuff. I also want, like, there are certain sandwiches or meals that I feel like, should feel like bar food or like comforty even if they're on the healthier side and that

filly cheese steak felt too it just didn't feel like rugged enough like I need some oil dripping out I want like the cheese to kind of like there wasn't enough cheese it was almost too boring of an attempt at it was just too like in a way it felt too LA like not too much fat not too much calories like just enough to feel like you had a Philly cheese it's like Philly Chase cheese steak light This is going to see me. It felt like a cafeteria doing, we're doing a, we're doing a Philly Cheesesteak special today. Like, it didn't feel like, I'm like, you're, you're supposed to be a good sandwich restaurant. And if you're going to put this Philly Cheese Steak thing on the menu as a special, you got to, you should be blowing socks off.

And this is the size of their sandwiches always, right? Because I think what the issue is for me is the width. Like, I think a little bit more width that would also, like, you guys want, like, I think the bread would be a little bit easier to deal with. When you're saying with, do you mean, like, like, top to bottom? No, I mean like horizontal. Got it, got it, got it, got it. I think it was, yeah, like, I think I need more. Because when I opened up the Philly Cheese steak, I was like, okay, there's, like, a square inch of steak and, like, a dollop of cheese.

Like, generally, you can't even find the steak in there because it's so cheesy and there's, like, onions and, like. The Aronchini was bombed, though. The Aronchini, I don't think this place is bad. I don't think it's bad. I don't think it's bad. I don't think we're saying that it's bad. I think we're saying that it inflates. your expectations because of the marketing and because of it like it kind of having a little bit

level of prestige and a little bit of a higher price point. You think like, oh wow, I'm getting getting a really good sandwich here in L.A. Can I say the last X? Yeah. He does suck, though. It's okay. You can say it. I won't tell him that you said it.

Did I respond to that? No. The Philly, the one thing I liked about the Philly cheese steak, which was fine, it was the garlic aoli, but it tasted like, which I thought was nice. But it tasted like what it is. which is an LTO from a place that doesn't do cheese steaks, and usually the best cheese steaks are from places that specialize in it. The spicy pea, which I like, to your point,

just needs a little bit more of that cutlet in there. Like the cutlet feels a little paltry. So it's a chicken cutlet. I thought because they double up the cutlet. So I don't know. I was okay with that. I feel like I had a big chunk that was just bread. And by the end of it, I was just taking the cutlet out.

That's not good. But anyway, chicken cutlet, spicy vodka sauce, which I do like because I'm a bit of a heat seeker, fresh mozzarella, grated Romano, basal pesto. It's not spicy at all. I'm like, okay, sir. All right.

Okay. They call it a charred. Their language is charred. Their bread is charred, which I don't think it's particularly charred. No, charred? That's what they call it. No, because charred to me, and I'm like, I'm not even like a connoisseur.

Like that, that makes me think smoky. Yeah. And also a step past toasted, and I didn't think that was even toasted. It didn't. It needs to be more toast. The bread needs to be crowsed. And not only that, it's more of an issue. Not only, if you toasted that bread, it still wouldn't do what I wanted.

Because it needs to be soft on the inside and then the outside needs to have a little crisp to it. And that just does not what it is. Mine was pretty crispy on the outside. It was just too rough. Like, I couldn't. I need a crunch. It was almost stale. Yeah, when you feel like you're going to, like, the top of, like the roof of your mouth is about to be raw as hell.

Like, that's an issue. Yeah. I wanted more. I wanted more about and I was getting more of like, eating a sponge. I think you're saying the same thing. Yeah. Because it had the, it had the, you know, the hard texture of something that had been and crisped up or charred or toasted. But it wasn't quite toasted, like, toasted enough where you got that good crotch.

You just got, like, a little bit of a tough first bite, and then you were kind of chewing through the dense fibers of it. You're probably, and my question is, it's like, we, I've never eaten here in person at Giata, Giata. You can't, Mitch, no one has eaten in person at Giazza. They're not just not letting you go. You can eat there in person. Really? They're the Willrose Hill one, I think. Yeah, there's a location in the back and they have tables.

It seems very much like a takeout place. I do think that's the only one that has seating, though. I think most of them are takeout. The Highland Park one has a couple tables for tables. Oh, okay. But it seems like a takeout. It's oriented towards takeout and delivery. Yeah.

I mean, look, that being said, I don't, the Arancini were good. The eggplant fries, I thought were good. That's the thing is, everything was, like, seasoned. Like, it was flavorful, but I think that maybe the, like, because you know what I'm thinking of, like, when I'm thinking of sandwiches that I'm like, oh, I'm thinking of Il-Tremzino. Like, you can't, do you guys have, have you guys had the sand, like the paninis at Il-Tam? I have not.

I have, yes, good. You know what you got to take him. I'll take, I'll take someone. We'll go for content. All right, there we go for content. I was like, this is a sandwich where like I will order like three and eat one half of each one at night and then just be like, I can't move. Yeah.

So good. Yes. Another good American Italian place. Actually, they might be from Italy, right? Are they originally from Italy? I could see that. They've literally been around since I was, like, in high school. Like that Il-Tram is like, they've got one off of Ventura, then one in Beverly Hills.

I don't know if they've got other ones, but those sandwiches are out. I've never even actually eaten anything but the sandwiches there. Wow. Giata sandwich is so bland, you can bring them over to Italy and they'd be thrilled over there. I'm going to get so much hate mail from Italians. Oh, my gosh. And their sandwiches aren't, they're not, I don't think bland is an issue with the sandwiches. No, no, no, there's definitely flavor.

It's just, we know. something's off, but we don't know exactly. I think it's the bread. I think it's the bread. I think it's the bread. It almost felt like the bread needed like more salt or something. Like there was something. Something missed. The bread was bland. You know who to bring in there. Yeah. Baker filmmaker.

Let's get Mike's take on this bread. Emma and our and our videographer. Yes. Mike Dorfman is a great breadmaker and they can use the help. I'll take the rest of my sandwich home and make him try. Yeah. And then can we get an update? Give me some bread now. Can you guys? Can you email me? I want to know what's I know this is like my one hurrah, but I want to know what happens.

Mike, here, put in between my fingers, put your thoughts on the bread right here, please. Mike, don't do that instead put canceled. Fuck, I'm holding it? Put a cancel load for Jemmy. Don't do it. No, you can, feel free to add your thoughts, append your thoughts, Mike, or like put them in a little pop-up video thing if you like. Oh, little pop-boys pop-up video. Maybe fun.

Like a little... Mike Poppins. That's, we're towards the end of this podcast, clearly. I'm just like, cool, maybe one day I'll meet Mike. He's great. I'm like, Mike sent to bread

and he's going to do a little thing. I don't know cool. Do you remember how music videos when pop-up video came around? They were still huge at that point. It wasn't the beginning of the end for music videos. Or media.

The Aaron Cheney were good, and you picked up on something, Mitch, that is, that you didn't know, but they have white wine in them. The risotto balls have like a little hint of the wine aftertaste. You did. This palette.

It never lets me down. That's so funny. Yeah, those are good. I did eat two of those. Yeah, that was good. I did eat two of those. And then the eggplant fries, I thought were fine.

They were good. I thought it was tasty. Yeah, they were tasty. Everything here, I genuinely think if the bread was different, I think this is like a five star. Like a five, sorry, five-star, five-fourk restaurant.

I know, it's the mistake you make all the time. He did it. You got him. He said star instead. I know, you do it all the time. Ladies and gentlemen, we got him. it would be a five four it's a I'm canceled

yeah you canceled because you said stars instead of forks this is a fucking letterbox okay five four it's I think it would could be a five fork restaurant that bread was better like I think it's I think I think I don't think just fixing the bread I don't think if you give this place elite bread

I still don't think it's quite a five forker I think could be like a four forker but I mean like so you're going sub four forks well I don't know I mean like I'm just I'm just thinking I'm not I'm not telling what my actual fork score is going to be, but like... Hey, well, guess what? Touch cotton or get off the pot. Let's get to it.

Okay, great. I actually think that if they were to, like, because, like, the orangeini and the zucchini, or the, was it, oh, the eggplant was good. Yeah. I'm like, I feel like they're better at not doing sandwiches, maybe. Like, like, I was like, when I ate the arrantuni, I was like, I kind of want to see what their pauses would be like.

Like, they'd probably be bom, you know? A bit of an indictment of a sandwich place that, but it is like, yeah, maybe if they have, had a full-service Italian restaurant. That would be a better way, a better use of their talents. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. At times, it can feel like everyone else has their love lives sorted out. Whether you're married, dating, or single, most of us still are exploring our paths. No matter where you are in your romantic journey, therapy can help you to better understand your desires, recognize what might feel overwhelming, and find gentle ways to lighten

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reviews. Sign up and get 10% off at BetterHelp.com slash doughboys. That's BetterHelp. H-E-L-P.com slash doughboys. Do it. Wags, you know what I like about the winter months? What's that? I can stay inside, cuddled up, on my Helix mattress with Wally and Irma. I don't got to worry about going outside and facing the cold. Yeah. I can be comfy in my cloudy little bed and heat up right there with my two angel cats.

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now I had it for a long time. It's almost time for new Helix for me. You've gotten some good sleeps out of that bad boy. I certainly, that thing has seen quite a few sleeps. I got the Moonlight Lux. I love it, Wags. It's improved my sleep so much. My sleep as you know, in general, has improved over the course of Doe Boys. Very much so. I love my Helix mattress. Walling Irma love my Helix mattress. Anyone who sleeps on my Helix mattress loves my Helix mattress. Wow. Go to helixleep.com slash doughboys for 27% off sitewide, exclusive for listeners of Do Boys. That's Helixleep.com slash doughboys for 27% off site wide.

Make sure you enter our show name after checkout so they know we sent you. HelixSleep.com slash doughboys. Night night, buddy. Why are you standing at my bed? Just watching. Okay. Vanessa, so here's what we're going to do.

We're going to go around, give our closing arguments, if you will, on this particular chain, and give it a score from zero to five four. So you're our guest, your thoughts on Jada, your fork score. Four forks and above gets it into the Golden Play Club, which is a hollowed hall. Yes. I feel like I'm a really generous person and I love food, but it feels in my soul that this is a three and a half forker. Wow. The fact that all of us picked up on one variable, which is the primary, like, ingredient in their restaurant for the main thing that they serve as

not being the best. Like, we all know what's inside of the sandwich is bomb, but, like, that's not why you, like, you don't eat a taco just for the stuff inside. Like, you want the casing to be dope. So I think that that is, like, too large of a variable to ignore. But flavors, bomb, great try, that something's off. Especially as a sandwich lover, I'm like, it's not going to be my first place to go

to for a sandwich, unfortunately. Wow. Yeah. I feel bad. You shouldn't feel bad. You shouldn't feel bad. No. And Gia, I'll say this.

And how do you say it? Is it just Gata or is it Gia? I don't think you pronounce both G. Like Gia. Like G unit? That's so funny. I need 50 to be out there promoting those same. Tomorrow, tomorrow.

That was like, who was it, Jarl did the Greek place here? Remember he did the commercials for the? Oh, right. It was very funny. Which one was that? Was it Pupacristo? I think it was Pupacrisos that he did a thing for. It was very, very fun.

Is this post or pre-fire island? I think this was... Post. Maybe post to help his image, honestly. That's what I'm going to go with. Also, how do you know the Jim Brooks movie he made while I was working at The Simpsons popped up on the screen for a second there? I... Don't worry about it.

Were you watching it in here? Maybe. I... Gia, I think that you... We're not going to... I feel bad, too, because I think it's not a bad sandwich place. And I think these guys are passionate about it. they pretend to be Italian at least, according to

Amelia, but I, I, I, uh, yeah, you need it, you need the sweatshirt to prove it. Um, I, I, I think that it's, it's a decent sandwich and I think that with the different bread, I think that this would put it into the golden plate club. And I think they really should consider switching up that bread recipe and, and, and figuring out the bread situation. Because I think there's a lot of good flavors going on there and their sandwiches have good flavors and the, and the vodka sauce is good.

But as of right now, you're just on the outside. side of the Golden Play Club to me. I'm going to go 3.754. Wow, three for more generous than me. Cool, cool, cool, cool. Amelia for audio listeners, tell everyone what your sweatshirt is. I think you described this before. It's the one that says Italian. Italian. Send that under it, it says Italiano. Don't read it from the monitor, read from your shirt.

It says Italian. Wait, we have to, okay, wait, hold on. Okay, so listeners, so the way, okay, it's a sweatshirt, but it's in the form of like a dictionary, definitely. And so it starts with Italian, and then it goes into like Italian, you know, with the little parentheses of Italian. How do you say it? The noun, one, a person of descent of, oh, there's a flag, of Italian descent, two, consumer of massive quantities of spaghetti and pizza. Three, blessed with good looks.

Four, strong believer in, I'm going to guess family, because it shows a mom and a little bambino. And then five, known to be a lover, not a fighter. six famous for great works of art and literature. Italians can do everything. And then seven was pardoned for January 6. I was going to say on the back it says Trump 2020. Wow, what a sweatshirt. That's my first time reading it, actually.

I just read the first one. I like that you try to read it for the first time backwards in the monitor. Confidence is key. It's not backwards. Oh, you were just having that much. All right. We'll talk about this later. Spalt type.

Also, are they lovers not fighters? Yeah, I erase an eyebrow. Maybe Italian Americans are fighters not lovers because I feel like they'll fight. They're definitely fighters. And they're, yeah. Also, too. And they're not fighting Italian people. They're fighting everyone else.

They're fighting everyone else was not Italian. I'm curious to see whether or not once this episode comes out, if, like, you're going to get an influx of people like, finally someone brought up the bread. Like, someone out there is thinking exactly what we're thinking, guys. It's the bread. You don't doubt it. Like, we're like a litmus test for it. There's five of us.

You, you weren't down with the bread either, right? No, and I, I'm, I've gotten so picky about bread because like Mitch said, Mike makes bread all the time. So I don't, I eat homemade bread all the time. So I'm so picky. And that was, it was. And the fact that none of us talked about this before, that there's five out of five people. We're like, yeah.

So that means we're the focus group. Yeah. It's bad. It's, we've proven it, I believe. The fork score is so far, three and a half. from Vanessa, three forks, three times from the Spoon Man. What say the dais? What would you land with forks?

Emma? I would say, like, I'll say three and a half forks. You say three and a half, Amelia? I would say three. Five. You say three forks one time. Yeah. I'm a bit staggered here because I wasn't quite expecting to land where I land,

and I certainly wasn't expecting to be the outlawful. liar. But I find this place just consistently kind of disappointing. And we've had it for I've had jobs where it's been part of like a work lunch order and like you get like one of the wraps and the wraps are like boring but fine. It's like pure sustenance. You know what I mean? The headgum hunks love it. Yeah. They come. They order lunch and then they go home. Yeah. They high five. Yeah.

Maybe they don't eat the bread though. It's it's inside. They're like high fiving about how much Brad they threw away. By the way, it's insane how empty the office continues to be. It was what I got here at 2 p.m. Emma got here. The only person here was the CEO, and he let Emma in and then left. It does look like... Because the door's broken.

This is a well-willed machine here at Headgum. It does look like a scene from like the mist or some sort of TV king of post-apocalyptic. Always in HeadGum. It's very post-apocalyptic. I just like, every time I order this place, I'm like, I kind of wait. I wish I'd gotten something else. And I also don't think it's bad. You're going to piss the honks off.

I don't think it's bad. But I also just don't, it doesn't knock my socks off in the way that I would expect for a place of this pedigree and reputation. The rainbow cookies were fine. I don't really like these sort of almond-flavored cookies. That's the same thing we said. We don't like the almond flavor. I hate almond essence.

Wow. Hate it. Yeah. I don't know why it's a thing. I don't know who came up with it. Like, do you remember when you would get Jordan almonds? Like any party that had Jordan almonds when I was little, I was like, I hate them forever. I don't see the point.

Like, I want sweet, like either processed like white sugar, sweet, cane sugar, chocolate, whatever essence that you just squeezed out of this fibrous nut and you're trying to make me eat as dessert is just not, I'm not buying it. I just feel like you're trying to fuck with me. What is the cooking almond extract? Yes, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, yeah, I'm not a huge almond. Yeah, me neither. Not a big fan.

I like almonds, but I don't feel like if you were to like squeeze almond, you know, juice out of an almond, it would taste like that. It's like another artificial flavor that they made up. Yeah. It's very sciencey. It's gross. And all that said, I'm not going to give this place a bad score, but I'm not going to give it a good score either. And I'm just going to give it a score. I'm going to give it right where it belongs as far as I'm concerned, which is lower than everyone else.

But still three forks. Okay, so the average is basically like 3.3 forks, essentially. Yeah. Which is tough for like a place that is considered a big sandwich place in L.A., but, hey. They're doing fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got their black and white cookie there once. Okay, talk about it.

It is not an authentic black and white cookie. It is trash. It's just, it's not, they just took a random, I don't even know what flavor it is, but they just made the icing. Look like a black and white cookie. And black and it's just not. Like, if you had told me that before, I would have given them three forks. Like, literally.

Like, do you see my hands? I'm, like, pissed. I'm like, excuse me, black and white cookies? I almost added. If it's an authentic black and white cookie, you're having. Macaulay Culkin blow and George went in the storefront. Why? Why?

I think, is it Frommens in the valley? They've got, like, the best black and white cookies. I've heard. Oh, yeah. It's a bomb. Yeah. Wow. It's so good.

I just feel like if you're going to. market yourself as like, you know, Sopranos memorabilia, New York, New Jersey stuff. You got to have good black and white cookies. You got to have good bread. But here's the thing is to someone who's never had a good black and white cookie. You have nothing to reference. So that's good. Yeah.

You can only know if it's bad if you've had a good one. Like the minute you said that, I got deeply offended. Yeah. I just wish you had more. I wish you had bought it so we could try it. But you were like, fuck that. If it had more of a New York, New Jersey deli vibe, as opposed to this elevated L.A. thing that they're trying to go for.

then my score would probably be higher. This place is like a magnum condom on a regular-sized dick. It's like, look what I got. You're like, okay. You're like false advertising. Yeah. What are you doing? Hey, we can wear whatever you want.

And it's funny sometimes. This is where he starts crying. I got a text for my sister that just said, Mom thinks the plane rules don't apply to her, so I don't know what's happening on the flight. Oh, this. She's in the cockpit. She's going to be on a TikTok.

I'm like, uh-oh. What's mom's doing? Hey, that was our review of Jada. It's time for a segment. It's the return of serving USA. Oh, God. If everybody had a portion across the USA, then everybody'd be serving

like California A burritos. You'd see them snacking from baggies. and eating sandos too A bushel bushel tomatoes Serving USA Deep fried pan fried USA Deep fried pan fried USA

Come on Mitch Deep fried pan fried USA Deep fried pan fried USA Deep fried USA Deep fried pan fried USA Deep fried pan fried USA Everybody's gone serving serving USA

Okay, so the rules of serving USA is Mitch and Vanessa must guess the amount of servings per container for a forgiven food stuff and the closest guess wins a point for that round. Oh my gosh, I love games, let's go. I love how your singing voice goes from a 12-year-old boy

asking his crush to go to a pool party and then to a guy on trial. Poverty hits everyone's different. Beach Boys are a tough. Flip, luckily. Yeah, that's a lot of falsetto. All right. We've had such a good time talking to you that we've gone forever.

But this stupid. We call it comfortable I look. All right, first up. Oh, it's there. Oh, we got, we got a visual here. Totino's pizza rolls. What do we do? So here's a day, I will, I will guess that I will give you the number of serving per

I'm sorry, I'll give you the size of the package and then you guess how many serving. that translates to. Got it, got it, got it, got it, got it. So if it's like a Gatorade and I say it's 16 ounces and it's two and a half, you can guess two and a half servings. I was like rules understood. Yes. Totina's pizza rolls, pepperoni, this is a pack of 50 rolls. How many servings are in a container of 50 rolls?

Each of you can guess. I'm going to guess, I'm going to say 10 servings per containers. I'm going to say eight. Vanessa gets it on the dot. Eight servings per container, six rolls. There's no way Americans are just eating five. No, that's where my head was at, too. All right, next up, Entenmin's chocolate chip cookies.

Is that two points for getting it on the nose? Hmm, we haven't established that rule for serving USA, but you can't. Oh, sure, yeah. Yeah, let's be loose with it. Why not? You brought it up. You brought it up. Guys, I love this.

Okay. All right, so we need to. You don't have questions you don't want the answers. Amelia, we should make a note of this, too. This is the Vanessa Chester rule that you get two points. BLC. The BLC. The BLC.

if you get it on the dot. That's cool. It sounds like DLC, which is a video game term. There's also a software that's a VLC program that will fix like corrupted audio and fix corrupted videos.

That's what I do. Many, many times. I fix corrupted things in the world. That's what I do. We'll fix doughboys. If you download it, we'll fix doughboys audio. It's actually the one thing.

You guys, I used to fuck these box of chocolate chip cookies. Wow. This is a... I mean, these... I like, I like, I like, this excavated some shit. I was like, I used to eat those a lot.

Okay. So we don't have the count of cookies because it's packaged by weight, but this is a 12-ounce package. Damn, that makes it so hard. And servings will still, are servings in ounces or are they in numbers of cookies? Servings is just a number. So it's like how many, how many servings per container and 12-bondage? Are we saying how many each or? How many servings total, not how many are in a serving?

Oh, okay. How many servings are in the box? Yeah. Oh, that's tricky. Yeah, that's like reversed. Can we guess per serving? Yeah, we can, and then we can just figure out the math from there.

I think I listed the serving. Yeah, I have the serving size too. So if you want to guess that, that's fine. That's fine. My brain just exploded. I'll try to do, well, I'm going to go first. Yeah, you, I'm going to say 2.5 per serving, and then I'm going to go.

Diabolical to make a cookie serving. I know, but I feel like that's, like, that's that bullshit that they would do. And then I feel like there's, um, 12 servings per container But there might be more Fuck I may have fucked up Fuck

I want to say 2.5 But you already said it so I won't Either three or two Yeah exactly You might be on it too I think it's yeah I'm gonna go with three just for You know

Switch it up Three and then 11 servings This is unbelievable You got both exactly right 11 servings of three cookies a piece Guys, do you see what I'm saying when I say a snack? Yeah.

Like, is that four points? You have four total, but I feel like for that one round you should get four points. I think you should get an extra point. Why? Okay. Oh, great. Because you got the serving and the serving sides. I love VLC.

Wait, is it VCL? VLC. Don't hate on my rule because I'm winning. Vanessa. It can just be two points. My middle's name is Lee. What's your middle name? I was wondering that, because you have two first names.

I have a tricky middle name to guess. Do you want to guess it? Is it start with an M? You're getting everything right. I'm going to be freaked out if you get it. It starts with a D. Can I give you a hint? Because it seems like you're a basketball fan.

I don't know if you're, I don't know if you're up to date. If you took his middle name and his last name, you would have a current NBA player. Oh, fuck. Wait. His middle name. He is a,

this player is an all-stop. And if you get this, you'll get two more. I literally like, I can't, I'm just thinking Mitchell and I'm like, I can't think of anything. I don't think it's going to happen. D. Mitchell, Donovan Mitchell of the Cleveland Cavaliers. But I'm not at Donovan. Donovan. Donovan?

Donovan? Donovan? Donovan? Michael, Donaldovan, Mitchell. Donovan, you sound like a love interest from like an anime in the 90s. Like Sailor Moon. Like Sailor Moon would be the answer. She's like, Donovan from Jupiter and like you're the greatest.

All right. How old the Sailor Moon? She's old enough now. Yay! That was my girl. Anyway, okay, so I clearly know a lot about snacks. Like what I told the FBI, drawings don't have an age. Yikes.

That's the evidence room? All right. Next up, Annie's shells and white cheddar. This is a six ounce box. How many servings per container? Oh, man. This is tricky. You can go first.

I'm not even thinking about servings. I was literally like looking at this. And you know, it's the first thing that popped into my head, constipation. I had so much Like literally it was like constipation I totally I had so much stomach problems When I was younger

And I was eating Kraft macaroinchees Of course Because you were just like Yum the commercials But then your body was just like But also I'm like I think that our generation Like we look so much younger

Than like Gen Zers Like the fucking Flintstone Chalk Vitamins with red dye number 40 And white cheddar annies Like we're never gonna die We're good We are so good Like

It also So have you missed dinner, like growing up? Like I was making mac and cheese a lot of the time. You remember I was very constipated? A very fat thing I did once is I went to Carl's Jr. I'm saying, I'm just one example of that thing I did as a teenager. I went to Carl's Jr. And I got a double Western Bacon Cheeseburger combo large size with a doctor pepper.

I would think they had Dr. Pepper, right? Whatever they, if they had Pibb, it was Pib. I brought that home. And then to go with it, I made a box of macros. oni and cheese and ate all of it. Just like not one real, like, calorie sustenance. Just pure plastic.

All garbage. That's fat as hell, my man. We all, like, lived on those bacon Western. That was so, I was like, what do you mean you got onion rings with barbecue sauce on a burger? I will be in that drive-thru every day in my Chevy Blazer. I love it so much. Thank you, Small Soldier.

The Burger King Small Soldier meal is, isn't it? The Rodeo burger. The Rodeo burgers. The Western Bacon Cheeseburger is the one from Carl Jr. Yeah, Carl's Jr. was first. Oh, wow. Okay. Because we had Carl's Jr. out here.

I remember getting it as a kid before small soldiers. All right, this is the Annie's Shells and White Cheddar. Okay. Do you want to go first? Yeah, you've gone first. Okay. Well, you've had a buck going second row. You want me to go.

So I have to say... This is a six-ounce box. How many servings per container? I have a thought in my head. Do you want me to go first? I could just do this and not hear you because I'm like, my brain is thinking so much. It's not doing anything. I think that there's four servings in this per container,

which maybe is too low. Yeah, it's funny that six ounces. This is consistently a meal for one. Yes. And then, but there's, it always feeds more than one. Yeah, it was going to be like six ounces is like, but I'm thinking of like liquid ounces. So I'm thinking of a cup.

It's, I mean, also if you make a box of mac and cheese, you can fit it in like a small bowl. You know what I mean? You can still put almost all of it in a small bowl. Yeah. But I said,

I'm going to say four. I think four, around four. Four. I don't know. I'm just going to say, like, it's either two or two point five. That's just the numbers that are in my head, but I feel confused about this one. Do you want to pick one? Oh, God damn it.

Two? You are going to win, but with 2.5, you would have gotten it on the dot yet again. I knew it. I knew it was 2.5. You did say it was about a cup. A cup is a serving. Yeah, a cup is a serving. So I did kind of get it.

Yeah. Is this a new talent that I should I like that? I think so. I literally was going to say. 2.5 and it was like, no, they're going to think this is rigged. The listeners will. I love the VLC. Next up.

You might as well add one last cry to the episode. Ew, I hate Coke. This is Diet Coke. Here's the thing is if I'm going to drink, I do not drink diet anything. I have this cane here. I'm covering it up so I don't look. It doesn't matter. That's a two-liter.

This is a two-liter. But also. Your Diet Cup. Yeah, you can look at this. Yeah. It's not going to affect anything. Yeah. That it's more than one serving.

Fuck, one can. Always drink regular. Don't always drink regular soda. Don't drink the fake zero and the diet ones. I mean, I still love a Coke mini. I will, that's my favorite. But I'm just saying, okay, so they say Coke zero, but like. Oh, yeah.

It's not zero calories because you're ingesting something. Oh, yeah. It's fake. Sure. They've said that like the. fake sugar is just is almost as bad for you as, as the, as the real thing. Well, no, but the reason why the fake sugar is bad for you is because you get the taste of sugar, but your body isn't actually getting sugar, so then you over crave it.

And that's when you lead to binges. So, like, throw some real sugar in there. Like, your body, your brain needs it. So that's my whole thing. I don't have to tell me twice. I pull out a bag of sugar. Yeah. It's like, it's like, would you like some splendor? What was your, your alternate pronunciation of aspartame? Aspartame.

Like it's fucking Greek. That sounds like a beauty, like a cream I'd put on my face. I do like an aspartame, like, dip before I like go to bed. And then I called it La Columbe, because I just like adding syllables, I guess. I think, and I'm not going to call Gigiata, because why not? Linguistics is descriptive, not prescriptive. This is a two-liter bottle. Two-liter.

Okay. Two-liter of Diet Coke. Who's first? Mitch? I'm over here like two-leaders equals how many quarts and how many pants? Okay, that doesn't matter. I think it's going to be smaller than you think on this one. I'm going to say, you about to unsip your fly.

I'm going to expose myself to win serving USA. I'm already in the hole. I'm going to say that this is, come on, I got to get some VLC, four servings per container. Mitch says four. Come on. Or is this just going to be one bottle like this was one can. Is it going to be some bullshit like that?

It's not one bottle. It's more than one serving per container. This sucks. I literally just had like a liter of cactus cooler in my house and didn't look at the, and I didn't finish the whole thing. I was like, I feel like that number would be way high, but I don't know. I was going to finish a whole fucking liter of soda.

This is a two liter, so this would be more. But I'm saying, I was saying for a cactus cooler, something that has full sugar. Oh, yeah, then it was a two leader. It was a two leader that I had, but it got flat by the time I fit. Oh, yeah. Okay, you guys used to be all my week. It used to be that, oh, there was like, there was, like, there was

Flat orange soda is the worst thing. Yeah, rough stuff. That's, it's dime a tap. Okay. Co. I don't fucking know with this one. This is tricky. I don't know.

I'm just going to say the first number of my head. Five, and I don't know why. It's just five. Vanessa gets it again. Are you fucking kidding me? Six servings per container, so you come closest. Oh, shit. I'm good at numbers.

I'm getting fucking destroyed over here. Next up, Mitch, to your point about Cactus Cooler, this is a thing to consider. I've had good guesses. The next thing is... God damn it. Coke heavy. Serving size for a 2-liter bottle of Coke heavy. So the same...

All right, Mitch. Wait, Coke heavy. Is that what you call it when it's not the type? That's what we call it. I'm going to go 12 servings per container, damn it. Mitch says 12. Oh, okay, okay. My brain.

So it's the same size as the previous one. I don't like this. Oh, I see what you did. I get what you did. You're smart. Oh, I see what you did. Yeah, you doubled the... non-diet version.

Okay, I see you. Hmm. Old Mitch got some tricks up his sleeve. I'm like, do I do the old prices right, like right above you or right below you? I don't know. I'm just going to go with 11. I don't fucking know. God damn it.

Don't be right. It's the same as the diet go. Yeah, there's the... Oh, God damn it. This was a trap that Amelia laid for you. It is the same... It is the same serving size of the previous one. It's little...

So Vanessa gets a point. Because she was one under me? She was closest to six. Oh, damn it. Sneaky. Add that sneaky to that. What's the four? It is seven zero.

Put sneaky little fucker on that Italian sweatsh. All right, two more. Oh, shit. Hidden Valley Ranch dressing. This is a 24 fluid ounce bottle. Ew, disgusting. I fucking hate ranch. You hate ranch.

It's... Wow. You do have opinions on sauce. I have, I had so much fun up until this point. Get the fuck out of here. I've always been like a very light, like I was really into Thousand Island when I was little because I was fucking kid,

you know, but I just like balsamic vinaigrettes. Like I'm very light dressing and ranch like never into it when people would dip their pizza and like wings in it. I was like, why? We love ranch. I love this stuff. But on a salad, I agree with you.

I usually like a lighter dressing. Ugh. I got 12 servings per container. This is making my stomach turn. 12 servings, come on. Our buddy, Mitch, we had him on the podcast before Joel Boyd was in a Hidden Valley Ranch commercial and had a straw that he was drinking directly out of a bottle of ranch. Jesus. It was actually ranch.

Sounds like some funny or die bullshit. They couldn't put like a white milkshake in there, vanilla milkshake in there or something. I believe it was ranch, but you know, I could be wrong. We talked about it on the episode. No, no, no, no. You would have to give me like a flat vanilla milkshake with like. confetti. Like, just, you know, like, like, just like, like, not confetti, like,

sprinkles that look like a seasoning and I'll just sip that shit. Like, I'm not, I'm, like, mad looking at the ranch bottle. Okay. Can you tell I'm, like, so triggered? They're like, Vanessa's completely spiraled out when we put the ranch up. 24, I mean, I'm going to go with, like, 20 servings. Vanessa wins this one. It has...

What the fuck! 24 servings per container. An ounce. I was going to say 24 because I was like, there's no way that they're going to have you. I thought two ounces would be a fucking serving. God damn it. No, they always under you for like high fatty things. What, the serving size on this says 30.

30 what? I think this is probably, is that a metric? But the servings per container is 24. The 24, yeah. All right, one more. Hey, a little Jurassic Park homage. Some Tyson Dino Nuggets. I'm like, oh, a T-Rex.

I understand this. You're just seeing Jeff Goldblum in all these. I'm like triggered. I'm just like screaming. This is a 1.8 pound bag. So how many servings are in a nearly two pound bag, 29 ounce bag of dino nuggets? Wait, say that again, why?

This is a 1.8 ounce, I'm sorry, 1.8 pound bag. Oh my God. A lot of fucking shaped meat nuts. Like, that's a lot of imprinting dinosaurs. I never got into the custom nugs. I'm always like, I like a thing that just looks like a nugget. When it starts looking like something like this, I just know it's, or I know, I know, I know it's processed. I understand it, but intellectually.

Yeah, but this is like a too, like I'm very much, like I don't eat. I don't like boneless, skinless chicken. Like I've always been like give me full fat. I want bone. Right. I'm eating, like, I'm chewing on the cartilage. I'm eating like all the things. Like I'm very.

I was always a little tough for me for a while. Oh, no. I'm Caribbean. We basically like crack the bone open and like eating. the marrow. That's maybe why I never get sick. I don't know. Let's see. I'm going to go higher on this one as my guess. Looks like there's a

Are you closing your garage or looking up Tyson Dino Nuggets? Amelia, I'm going to go with the number of the Italian's favorite president 45 for Donald Trump. 45 servings. You're saying 45 servings in this bag. Is that insane?

It's a pound. It's almost two pounds. I don't know. It would be If we knew what the serving size... Fuck! No, 45 is too big. God damn it. You want to revise? I'm fine with it. I don't play. Okay, okay. Because there's probably like, there's probably like 50 nuggets total. All right, I'm going to go, I'm going to go 21. I'm going to go 21.

21. 21 is Mitch's guess. I'm trying to, is it just a stegosaurus and a T-Rex? Or is there another? There's a triceratops in there. Okay. I'm going to go with 18 because I don't know what else to do. Vanessa, again, is closest. It's a clean sweep. What the fuck? Nine to zero.

Nine servings. Nine servings is wild, actually. Yeah, well, oh, four, oh, it's not, it's because the bag is not as big as we thought. Yeah, it's because I guess a nugget is denser, maybe a frozen nugget is denser and heavier than we would have anticipated. It's also only four pieces. I just also was thinking two pounds, like it was like a shopping bag. I'm also assuming that they're doing serving size based on who's normally eating this, which is children. Oh, that's a good variable.

Four nuggets is obviously not an adult serving size. Right. What a performance by our guest. You kicked my ass. I'm usually pretty good. to the games. You got me. Met your match. You got me. This is the... I'm a snacker. This is that...

You were the... You were the... You were the Cape Burlant of Jingle all the way. As Cape Burlant and Jingle all the way, you're the Cape Burlant of serving USA. Thank you, so. Cape Burlant swept that game. Famously got a number of them on the dot. So there you go. And we have a VLC rule to show for it. That's so much fun. Just like a restaurant of our feedback. Let's up with the feedback. Today's email is from Mia from Connecticut. Mia writes, Are donuts of breakfast food?

I personally think of them as more a sweet treat dessert adjacent than exclusively breakfast. Got into this debate at my gym and I know who could settle it. Homer Simpson, but I don't have his email address, so feedback it is. Are donuts of breakfast food? I say yes, but I also, you can eat breakfast anytime of day. You should be able to tweet at Homer Simpson. You could have asked him this question.

Yeah. I was right in responses at one point. Selman set it up. I don't know if he still exists on X the Everything app. You're managing Homer's social media account? When Selman first opened it, I was like, I was like, Oh, it's me. I think I did, like, do something like that.

That's really funny. Well, okay. I, uh, hmm. I don't think donuts are a breakfast food. I think that donuts are a breakfast dessert or snack. Breakfast dessert. You have your bagel and then you have a donut. Wow.

That's like an accessory. It's like a purse for breakfast. I don't think it should stand alone. I'm not eating a donut on its own for a breakfast. Nope. Neither am I. It's a bad. full breakfast, but I do think it's a

breakfast food. I think it's a breakfast category. It's a breakfast dessert. I think that Americans have made it a breakfast food, but I, like, and I'm someone who loves sugar, baked goods, donuts. Like, I fucking love that stuff. I don't want to start my day with that.

Like, I'm going to crash. I will have a donut for breakfast, but it has to be after something real. Like, I need actual sustenance. I'm the same way with dessert. Like, I need a real meal, and then I will eat 90 pieces of cake. Right. But I don't want the cake first.

I'm with you on this. And I'll say this. You know what? We have all the rules for 18 and over. How about relax? How about 18 and under you can consider a donut a breakfast food, but 18 and over is no longer. I don't know if you've ever been around a child who had a donut, but that is the worst way to start. It is a bad way to something.

But I'm saying like they can, they eat Pop Tarts for breakfast. They still can do that sort of thing. But this is the worst for them to do it, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The metabolism standpoint, I get what you're saying, but probably bad for, you know, growth and behavior and what have you. Amelia, you famously care about the first bite you take every day. Would your first bite ever be a donut? Never.

Never. Wow. Would it be anything sweet? Never, never anything sweet. Wow. What is it normally? Eggplant palm? I think sometimes.

I'd take that over a donut. Eggs, usually. Yes, eggs. It's got to be eggs. But do you think donuts are breakfast food in general? No. You say no, Emma? I also say no.

I literally don't think I've had a donut before nighttime in so long. I always, if I get donuts, it's like my dessert. It's my sweet treat at the end of the day. What do you guys think of it as a breakfast dessert? I don't know. Maybe. Yeah, because it's not your first bite if it's the dessert of your breakfast. You got an egg sandwich and you're like, I got a little donut as a little, I got some munchkins.

See, but here's the thing with breakfast, like, I'm that person who's like throwing syrup on my bacon and my sausages. So I'm getting that sweet that I need. Like, I want that type of sweet. Like, a little bit of, like, you know, syrup on my savory, like, sausage bacon moment. I don't want, like, pastry sweet. Well, what about, so how about waffles and pancakes? They count as breakfast? Those are breakfast.

Absolutely. Yeah. Oh, well, well, well. I think I would buy a donut with dessert. I think I would buy a donut with breakfast, but I would maybe, like, put it in my bag. Yeah, save it. Throughout the day or later, I wouldn't eat it with my breakfast. The way I used to eat a donut was I get a chocolate-frusted donut from Dunkin' Donuts,

and I would get an egg sandwich, and I'd eat the egg sandwich, and then I would eat the chocolate-frusted. So you were having a breakfast dessert. I was having a breakfast dessert. I would do it at the end. But you still in that, you've established with just that little anecdote that even when you bought both, the primary breakfast was the non-sweet thing. Yes, or a bagel.

Like, I need one of those first, and then like a couple munchkins are fun to have at the end of the meal. Donut holes don't. Oh, my God. You're having a good time. But I'm not going to just do. those as the breakfast. Donut friend, they'll give you like 14. Maybe it's just because I was going there so much.

They just would give me 14 donut holes. And I'd be like, I'm going to finish seven of these before I even get back to my house. Because I would walk there as a way to be like, well, this justifies you buying your own dozen for the party you're not going to bring them to. But those, like, they're little maple glazed donut guys. They're so good. Me and Susser and Jack Allison used to walk by a donut friend every day and make jokes about going in there. Now I want a donut and an ice cream cone.

But I can make that happen. Yeah. Here's what we're going to do. We're going to pull this. We're going to take this to the people. So everyone out there is a doughboys listener. Make your voice heard. We're going to put a poll out for our donuts.

Breakfast food, dessert, or breakfast dessert. Those are your options. We'll see what wins. And we will inform the populace. I do like breakfast dessert as a new category. It's kind of fun. We'll let those seven votes. decide.

I do like breakfast dessert. Yeah. It's a breakfast. Because I would do like pre-lunch or like pre-dinner when it's like I need something to eat before the real thing. So breakfast dessert gives me like a post meal, which I like. I'm going to be honest with you, I probably eat them more as a breakfast dessert than I do eat them at night.

You know what I mean? Like I'd rather have a donut at like after breakfast or in the afternoon even after lunch than I would. When the set goes down, the amount of sugar that I can pack away is unreal. Here's just one counter argument. Okay. Donut shops open early. Ice cream parlors open later.

So like if it was a dessert, wouldn't donut shops open at like noon? What was that place in Toronto that you were talking about that I didn't get to go to and I was mad? It was like donut cones. Oh, fuck. Those were so fucking good. That sounds like your perfect thing right now.

Like a cone that's made out of donut. Oh man, I would love a donut cone right now. It sounds perfect. Yeah, it was like, man, it was so, I got to figure out what it was. It was so fucking. good. I'm like, I'm imagining one of those like long donuts that's just like in a spiral and then ice cream inside of it.

It was almost like a churro. It was original chimney cones. It was like almost cheroish. It was great. It's like when they came up with like the sushi ridos. Yes. Which almost were so seemed gross to me. It just seems like a lot. Too much. Ungapachka to me. So yeah, you have you have some action items out there. We are going to

vote in the poll. Breakfast, dessert or breakfast dessert. And we're going to track down Vanessa's Shani ad. And also we're going to make a poll of who you're going to vote for in 2028. We are. It's going to be Trump, Biden, or Trump. Oh, God. The three choices. It's going to be like cryo Biden by then, probably.

Why did I say that out loud of my head? I was having this conversation the other day that I was like, they say that some people who are alive now might live forever. And I was saying how depressing will be if it's like Trump versus Hillary, like, four or whatever, and they're in new fucking bodies. It just might happen. That's like a Simpsons Halloween episode. It's like the year 20, like, 2100, and it's like just Trump's head in that little like thing.

And he's like, I'm never leaving. God, that would be fucking suck. Like future on the Nixon. They're like, the world ended. We're like, no, we just decided to not be a part of it anymore. We just went away. If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, email us at Feedbag at birdfuck.com.

Leave his voicemail at 830 go dough. Sorry. Our producer is Emma Erdbrink, our associate producer, Emilio Marino. Our video editor, Mike Dorfman, Do Boys apparel at kinshipgoods.com slash doughboys. And the Do Boys double our weekly bonus episode,

plus our entire back catalog over at patreon.com slash doughboys. Vanessa Chester, what a, what a food. Thank you so much for being here. Thanks for having me. This is the best fucking show ever. Oh, my God. Just like talking about food for, like, could you see how am I am?

I'm like, you guys don't want to kick it till midnight? Like, we don't have, you don't want to get dinner? This is not how the show goes. I feel like we always need to hibernate after this show is the other part of it. We now hate doing this, sadly. It's destroyed us. Napa Boys is in theaters. That's a strong way to end.

It's destroyed us. It's not a happy though. We have, we have, we've gone and done, we've done double episodes in a day. That's a lot. It's too much. Look, here's the thing. Mitch has just declared he hates doing this. So support him and Vanessa in their new film,

Napa Boys on February 27th in theaters. True. It's so good. And let's squash the beef with Armin and Bug. Let's squash the beef with Armin and beef. We'll squash the beef with Armin and Bug. That's part of the beef. Get them on here and then ban them again.

Also, thank you for saying the podcast is good and lying like you did earlier. Yeah, that was really kind. You guys Venmoed me to do it, so that's right. You're great actor. I'll send the other. I'll send the other. Thank you. Do you have anything else you'd like to plug? I don't think I'm allowed to yet.

But I'm working, so that's great. Oh, I do have Instagram. That's probably, you guys are like, come on Vanessa, plug your stuff. Vanessa L. Chester on Instagram, that's it. There you go. That's it. Such a great actor. You're great in the movie.

And also, you're just a blast to talk to. It's in, and I'm very excited for people to see the movie and see you in it, and I think they're going to love it. Well, thank you for having me. You did mention when we were at Tiff. You were like, I have this podcast, and it's about, like, chain restaurants, and we were, like, eating all the bar food. And I was like, yes, please.

And I thought he forgot. I was like, I wonder if I could be like, hey, can I be on that food thing? And then I got the, you know. You're the first member of the Napa Boys to be on the, to be on Do Boys. Like Steven Spielberg promising you a role, Mitch delivered. Absolutely. And this was way bigger than that. Far more fruitful.

Napa Boys, February 27th. That'll do it for this episode of Doe Boys. I know next time for the spoon man, Mike Mitchell. I'm Tiger Wire. Happy eating. See ya. Hey, I'm Gareth Reynolds, and I have a new podcast on Head Gum called Next We Have. Now this show is for people with short attention span.

which is everyone. I mean, you're probably trying to skip this ad right now, but don't, because you now legally have to listen to the show. That's how law works. Next we have is very simple. Each episode has three short segments. For instance, Lisa Gilroy and I write insane revenge, Yelp reviews for callers who had bad experiences with a business. The Do Boys play a game called Meal or No Meal, and Steph Tolliv and I go head-to-head on a thought-provoking game called Guess That Sound. The show is as dumb as it sounds, and we probably have more fun than we should. But it's a great time, and you should. should listen or watch new episodes of next we have every Thursday on YouTube or your favorite podcast app.

That was a HeadGum podcast.