Doughboys - Good Times Burgers with Betsy Sodaro (LIVE)

Episode Date: April 9, 2020

For the second show of our swing through the Rockies, Besty Sodaro (Duncanville, We Love Trash) joins for a review of Denver's own burger and shake spot, Good Time Burgers. Mitch reveals a secret and has a big surprise for Wiger. Recorded live at Comedy Work South, Denver in the before times (3/11/2020).Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgum podcast. In 30 U.S. states, there's a town called Lakewood. Mostly suburban mid-sized cities, sometimes near neither lakes nor woods. By virtue of their genericness, the collective Lakewoods represent a template of American centers of habitation extending unfortunately to Lakewood Church, the megachurch run by prosperity gospel huckster and soaking wet botched plastic surgery survivor Joel Osteen. But other Lakewoods have made positive contributions. Lakewood, California boasts the first indoor shopping mall, is the hometown of professional cyclist and three-time tour to France winner Greg LeMond, and it's also the home of the first

Denny's restaurant. Lakewood, Ohio is the birthplace of epidemiologist D.A. Henderson who led the decade-long effort to eradicate smallpox, and it's also where you'll find the first Aladdin's eatery, a Midwest Middle Eastern chain with 80 locations. And Lakewood, Colorado, gave us the late pro wrestler Dr. Death Steve Williams. As well as the headquarters of yet another well-known burgers and custard stand, found in 1986 by the owners of an upscale sit-down concept in Boulder called Round the Corner. Serving up cheeseburgers and sides including its signature seasoned wild fries, as well as an array of sweet treats like frozen custard, blended spoon benders, and even dog-friendly paw benders for canines who crave cream. The

eatery became beloved by Coloradans in Lakewood and beyond, and today has 34 locations in Colorado and two more in neighboring Wyoming. And three decades after its founding, this chain that shares its name with a popular 70s sitcom still serves food that evokes the catchphrase of the show's breakout star, Dino Might. This week on Doughboys, Good Times Burgers, and Frozen Custer. Welcome to Doughboys Live, what's up Denver? Thank you guys so much for all being complicit in our most irresponsible show yet. Clustered in a very small room for the number of people who are here, all sharing appetizers and drinks,

it's gonna work out fine. Guys, we've got a hell of a show for you tonight, but before we get any further, this week's Roses Courtesy of David G. Furtida. Let me introduce my co-host, John Benye Ramsey. Give it up for the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell. Eat shit. Don't blame me, I'm just the messenger. What's up Denver, how's everybody doing? Wow, what a crowd. What a crowd. Hot crowd. Hot crowd. It's a hot zone and a hot crowd. I have an announcement to make. Tom Hanks has tested positive for coronavirus. That's not a lie. Not a lie. That is true. Also tested positive for coronavirus. Utah Jazz Center, Rudy Go-Bear. He made a joke about it. He made a joke about it recently. And also, the NBA has suspended

its season. Is that true? Just happened. What the fuck, you didn't tell me that? It happened while it was backstage about to go up. You didn't say anything to me. That's like what I did to them, but you did it to me. They suspended the season. I also, I think I literally touched my face while I was making that announcement. I got a hard time not touching my face. It's about 60% of my body. Like a sentient bobblehead. An adult peanuts character. I played Charlie Brown. You could play Charlie Brown. No, I did play Charlie. You played Charlie Brown as a kid? How fun. Yeah, I was Charlie Brown and you were a good man, Charlie Brown. Did you get to wear the shirt? I do. I still have one to this day. Fuck, I love that shirt. Oh, it doesn't because I got fatter. Mitch, we had an incident

at the Utah airport, the SLC airport that I am referring to as Wormgate. That's right. So here's my side of the story. Shortly before we were supposed to board. Sure. I need some drinks for your story. Thank you. Thank you for Rachel helping us out. Thank you, Rachel. All right. Please tip generously. The service industry is about to take a hit. People definitely are going to need something to get them through a bit of a slow stretch. All right. Tip generously of here tonight. Do tip well, but let's not depress anyone anymore. Okay, sorry. I won't talk about what's happening in our world. I'll pull the wool over everyone's eyes. Everything's fine. I either it is the altitude or I might be positive for COVID as well. Boy, Jesus Christ. Yeah, not good. Yeah. I haven't I

haven't changed the sweatshirt since I went on the road. You know it's true. I know. I don't know science. Maybe they can find a cure off this thing. I will say the altitude messes with me a little bit. I'll get back to my anecdote once I get a little I get a little light-headed. Yeah, it's got that general like altitude sickness, whatever it's called. I feel like I have a mild version of it. Like I'm just slightly off the whole time I've been here. Yeah, I mean, come on. So we were at the at the jet at the I almost caused the jazz airport. That'd be great. It should be the jazz airport for real. They were like, are you worried about it? And then he went around and touched a bunch of microphones and now he has it. Yeah. That's insane. It's insane. I'm touching

one microphone tonight. Yeah, that's it one. That's the limit for me to I think actually, I think I actually did already touch yours. I grabbed it first before I grabbed this one because I didn't know what my position was. So here, so we're at the SLC airport, the Salt Lake City Airport, amongst a bunch of very nice Aryan people. And and I am we are about to board our flight. Like it's like it's like minutes away from where we're supposed to board and Mitch has to use the bathroom and ask him like watch this stuff. Number one, relax everyone. He goes to do that. And it starts our group is boarding. And I have a bag that I have to put in the overhead. Betsy does not. So I say to Betsy, Hey, Betsy, will you watch Mitch's stuff? While I go to put while I go get in line

so I can put this in the overhead. I so and she's fine with it. She's so chill about it. And I have no problem at all. I go and I get in line. And so I'm in line by myself. Mitch gets back to the restroom, sees me in line by myself and comes over and calls me a worm. He calls me a worm and a coward in front of a bunch of strangers who don't know how if he's serious, I went up to the you weren't you were like, first of all, there was like eight people between us. But I said Betsy watches, I'm going to embarrass him. And I walked up and I said, I just want to let you know you're a coward. And then I texted that you were worm texted me of the guy in the mummy who gets trapped in the pyramid. Because you think I'm I'm prioritizing my own survival over that of the group.

Yeah, and then you get covered in scarabies. And then I get my comeuppance. Yeah. But in reality, we know real life is not a morality play. Oftentimes the coward thrives. I It's true. It's true. I mean, monsters die in bed. Henry Kissinger is going to die in comfort. Hopefully soon, but he's going to die. He's going to die in his home. We've done this show five years were the most cowardly men there are. That's true. So but we have but okay, so I get out of I get out of line, I go back and I wait with you and Betsy. And then later, I so I have to put my bag way in the back of the plane, because there's no overhead space left. So it takes me a while to get off the plane. And while I'm you abandoned me at that point, I had to go pee,

you leave me alone. So you get off the plane by yourself, leaving me stranded. You're exhibiting warm like behavior. You're the worm. You're the one you are. This is projection. As always, you are being a worm. And so you think I'm the worm to make yourself feel better about your worm state. If you're if I'm a worm, you're a worm or a couple of worms in the fucking worm worm farm. Fine, we're a fucking worm farm. Fine, fucking worm. I think I think you're more of a slug than a worm. Slugs are lazy. Slugs are lazy. They're just slow. Well, yeah, that too. Wise Denver means it's a great city. It is a great city. We're having a lovely time. It means a lot to me. Should I tell the crowd what I told you backstage? I mean, I think you have to now.

I lost my virginity in Denver, Colorado. Don't clap too hard. I was 22 years old. I knew they would laugh at me. I was going to say you had a big day today. Motherfucker, this is amazing. The city made the impossible possible. You joined the actual mile high club. That's right. My first time in Denver. It was tenderly before I got my diploma from college. Okay, it kind of I got it in the wire. There's not a deadline. I feel like there is. There's no shame in being a late bloomer. Oh, shut up. I don't want to hear this condescending bullshit. So,

so the mile high city is where the spoon boy became the spoon man. That's right. It's really something. So I do like this city. I like Denver quite a bit. I do. It's the truth. Probably my favorite city. Do you think you might have a repeat tonight and lose your 30s virginity? Well, we do have the two rooms downstairs, Weiger. This is the night we finally fuck. This story line converges with one of us transmitting coronavirus to the other. Like a Game of Thrones season wrapping up. Also, how to how to Denver. Wow.

You guys shouldn't laugh too hard at 22. I'm mad at you all now. Don't virginity shame Weiger. I'm not shaming. Well, don't. Okay, fine. It's fine. I don't think anyone should fuck. Certainly not now. I agree with that. It should be let's chastity from this point forward. Yes, we both agree that it's bad. Yeah. I mean, that's what Natalie told me. Emma hit him with a drop. This is last night's drop. I have news. This is last night's drop. I fucked up.

We played that last night, didn't we? I don't remember. You don't remember? No, I don't remember these drops. The power of love. No, this is the part of the show I tune out. You tune out my intro I tune out your job. Guys, I don't know if I have a drop. Look through your look through your email right now. Look through your email right now. See if there's another one. All right, save some time. Talk about something. You talk about your list. My list? Do you make your little list? Yeah, well, I got show notes. Yeah, we'll talk about them. That's a little insulting to call it my little list. I mean, it is your little list. I do preparation for this. I have a bunch of notes in here. I call it your little list, your little list. It's not just a little list. We had a nice

Uber ride with Thomas in Salt Lake City. That's right, yeah. Thomas, a very nice gentleman in his 70s who definitely supports Donald Trump, but he was a big time parrot head. We got in, he's blasting Jimmy Buffett, and I ask him, are you a parrot head? And he says, yep. Just immediately, we have an all Jimmy Buffett playlist on our ride to the airport, except when he gets to the song, why don't we get drunk and screw? He quickly hits next track. No, he's not a boomer. He was nice. He wanted to save our ears. I think that he thought we would be like, he thought that we'd turn pale and jump out of the car. He was a very nice man with some great and great Buffett related anecdotes that we would not do justice trying to relay. Did you

have any luck finding a drop? My drop is ready. Okay, let's hear your drop. Am I hitting with that drop? I wish that I was doing this as a joke. Fucking drop. I will say that we had a lovely time. You song and I spent some time in Mrs. Mitchell's company. We had a lot of conversations with her. We, I think she's, she's very easy to talk to. You guys have something up in, you have a hot, cold relationship. No peeking. No peeking. I come out with a cookie on my penis. It was funny. Jesus. No peeking. Just the hardest direction. Shit all over myself. Oh God. That's it. That was great. Hey guys, I'm going to be at the Denver show with my buddies and figured some local Colorado 30H3. I don't know what the fuck that is.

Would be a good fit for the drop. Screw Spoon Nation and Burger Brigade. I'm all about the Betsy Brigade. Wow. That's, that's Nick Kirkman. Nick, are you here? Nick, are you here, Nick? You motherfucker. Wait, are you here? Oh, he is there. Security, get him out of here. Is Nick behind a column? I feel like he does has an obstructed mutes. Yeah. Guys, we should bring our guest out here. Hell yeah. Stop wasting time. We're lucky to have her and so are you. She's an actor and comedian. You can hear her voice now on Duncanville, which airs Sunday nights on Fox after The Simpsons. Make some noise for Betsy Sedaro.

I wanna run away. That's the best song in the world. That's a great song. Yeah, right? Betsy given each of us a shoulder massage as she entered. Yeah, I feel good. It felt great. Yeah, good. Relax me. Good. You feel good? I felt honestly, yes. I was having issues backstage. I have to go to the bathroom. Like you still do? I mean, it's been non-stop since I've been on the road. That's rough. I honestly feel like coronavirus might flush me out a bit. I think it'll get all those bad humors out of your system. What does that mean? It's like the fluids in your body, your humors. I think your humors out of it. It's coming in

and out of me. I just, we shouldn't eat food before we do shows. Yeah, it's tricky logistically. We had to eat right before we came over to do this show. Yeah, I feel wild. This is your hometown. I know. Hey, Colorado. And mine too because I lived here for three months. There you go. A lot happened. A lot did happen. A lot did happen. That's all that matters. That was a very small part of it, about 10 seconds of it. I lived in Evergreen for a few months. Evergreen. I was up there for elk mating season. It's true. No, I didn't get mounted or something. I don't know what the fuck you're gonna say. But I said this the other night. It was elk mating season and they were like just like thousands of elk just walking around. And I was like, is this like normal to

the person? And they were like, yeah, it just happens. They're like, walk around, they fuck each other. And I was like, all right. And I was like, what happens if like my car is there? And they're like, if your car gets crushed, it's just like you get crushed. You shouldn't live there. You shouldn't live where all the elks are walking around. But it was a very beautiful place. I went to Red Rocks. I saw Dave Matthews at Red Rocks. Of course you did. And he fucking tore it up. It was a great show. Don't call me a nerd. You just heard how old I was when I lost my Virginia. Of course I'm a nerd. You listen to the podcast. We still play video games and like cartoons. We're 40.

Yeah. Betsy, you're from Breckenridge. Is that me? Anyone from Breckenridge here? A few, a few, a smattering of Breckenridge. Breckenridgeers. So Breckenridge, known for its tasty powder. Am I talking the talk? Did you say tasty powder? It's tasty powder. Yeah, you sound like a skier. Okay, great. Some yummy tasty powder. Yeah, it's known for, yeah, the ski resort and stuff. And dumb and dumber. Oh, that's right. It's not fucking Aspen. Whenever I watch it with anybody, I'm like, that's not Aspen. That's fucking Breckenridge, okay? There's shirt off my back, okay? That's Breckenridge, not Aspen. And all of my friends are

like, we don't give a shit. Should. That was the first time you saw it. You were doing that in the theater? Oh, yeah, in fourth grade. It's not fucking Aspen. My dad was just like, sit down, please. I saw something about Mary with my mom and dad. And my sister and I were in the row in front of them. And then like at the jackoff scene, they were like, right. And laughing so loud, like Robert De Niro and Cape Fear level. And I was like, fuck. It's disgusting. It was awful. They laughed at like him beating off and stuff. It was weird. What, should I have not said this? No, it is fine. Do you think part of that was like them releasing the nervous tension of like you constantly jacking off in there?

We're cool with it, bitch. We're cool with it. Probably. Yeah, I, boy, the, the Farrelly's had a little run there, didn't they? There were some funny films. The Farrelly brothers were producing. Yeah, Green Book is really great. Green Book was really funny. That movie was so funny. That jackoff scene. Really good. Green Book, jackoff scene. First, we're going to win an Oscar with a jackoff scene. Whoa, cool. I bet he corrects me on that in five, four. I'm wrecking my brain. I'm trying to think of best picture winners at a jackoff. I think Casablanca. That's right. There's like a really nasty one where they were just both

jacking each other off, right? In Paris? Yeah. Play with yourself again, Sam. Yeah, there's a, there's gotta be like a horny scene in some like fucking, I don't know, terms of endearment or something. Like some fucking silence of the labs. There you go. That's what it is. There it is. There it is. That's what we needed. Not just jacking off, but fucking come. And then she puts it in her hair and makes a little wave. Dear God. Boy, that movie is great. Oh my God, it's so good. Dear God. This is terrifying. Your eyes lit up. No silence of the lambs. It's so good. It's a good one. I thought you were talking about Dear God. Remember that movie? What is that? What is that? Oh, is that where he starts praying and his wishes come true or something? What is

that? I think it delivers letters. I don't know. I don't know. Too confusing. Note to self, don't ever talk about that movie again. Let's move on to the lambs, by the way. It's not a tutorial. I just want to let you know. I'm not planning on making a skin suit out of where I, no plans for that. You could use me. It'd be nice and comfy. Room to spare. I wanted to ask you, Betsy, about food in Colorado. We're obviously tackling a local favorite, but is there anything, they can be chains. They could be individual restaurants. It could just be like a kind of food that makes you think of your home state. Pizza always comes to mind because of boat shows and I know we'll get a couple of,

we would always go the one in Idaho Springs. Yeah, with a thick, thick crust where you pretty much have one piece and you're done for. And then in Brecht downstairs at Eric's was like my big favorite place and they had a bunch of fun pizzas. Barbecue chicken pizza, that was my number one. We would always ditch social studies and straight up tell our teacher, I can't even remember her last name. I know her first name was Tabitha. We would just be like Tabitha, we're going to Eric's. And she's like, at least say you're going to the library. Like no Tabitha, shut up. She was awesome though. We watched the Kevin Costner Robin Hood because she was like, I'm pretty sure this is what medieval times was like. Tabitha, you're the best.

Tabitha rules. Tabitha rules. I went to a restaurant out here as well, the Buckhorn Exchange. Oh yeah, I've been there. Yeah, it's cool. What's that all about? It's like an old, it's like old West, it's old timey, westerny. Yeah. It's old Colorado. There's like things on Buffalo, Buffalo Bill went there. Buffalo Bill went there? Yes. I'm going to go even further, Buffalo Bill owned it. The silence of the Lambs, Buffalo Bill. I know, it's like, my mom and dad were like, you should, my sister and I were here and they were like, you should go and try Rocky Mountain Oysters. And we were like, okay. And then we got there. I was like, what are Rocky Mountain Oysters? They're bulls balls. So I was

like, oh, I'm not going to eat those. They're not bad. They're not bad. No, they're just deep fried and you dunk them in some fun looking sauce. It's good. Are they drained? Yeah. They drain them. What's wrong with you? I just want to know what I'm biting into exactly. Yeah, they're gone. They're gone. They're empty. Okay, that's good. No, they're like jalapeno poppers. And they're fucking good. I never thought I'd like cow cum. It's great. Also, the shining hotel is here. The Stanley. The Stanley. Very spooky. I was saying the other day that if I was confronted by the lady in room 237, that I would probably just stay with her. And then I asked what if the deal was she was like that hot babe, but anytime you wanted to get

intimate, she turned into the melty decomposing old hag. And I said I was still cool with it. Yep. And then I said that when I took my clothes off, she probably like, I'm not into you. Probably end right there. Oh yeah, every spooky thing. I'd empty out the hotel from all the spirits. Yeah, Mitch, you have cleansed the Stanley. Can I say, while we're on the topic of Stephen King adaptations, I was oddly attracted to Kathy Bates and Misery. Oh, yeah. I like it. I just kind of feel like, yeah, she could fucking kidnap me for a little while. Oh shit. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I feel like this attraction comes more from the place of like getting your legs broken. Yeah. I see that. I see it. That movie is so

fucking good. Jesus Christ. It's really good. There was a time they were just making like fucking mainstream like thrillers and horror movies, and they were just at a fucking amazing level of quality. Like chopping mall, which we watched last night. I love that movie so much. So much gratuitous nudity in shopping mall. Also, chopping mall, the pun, very little chopping in the film. No chopping. A lot of lasers, actually. It's a robot movie. It's a robot. It's a robot. Killer robot movie. A lot of deaths by laser fire. Again, the chopping is minimal. Yeah. Certainly not enough to justify the title. Yeah. Oh yeah, no way. What was, weren't you telling me there was, it's original title, something else? Killbots. It's original

title was Killbots. Yeah. I guess that tested poorly. They changed it to chopping mall. That's bullshit. It is bullshit. And that's what we're going to talk about all night tonight. Yeah. Chopping mall. Chopping mall. Minute for minute. Go down. One thing I love about that era of movies is that the actors they get to play teenagers are always clearly like 35. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I wonder why you like that so much, buddy. Just like the least amount of effort to cast a believable teenager. Yeah. Just a just a fucking adult man. I like that there was just like a like a doofus in that movie. I would like they just like cast like a doofus. Like a man who looks like a doofus. Like hot doofus chewing gum. Yeah. Like the main dork. And I was like if I was, if I

was in, if I was acting in the 80s, I'd be cast and stuff. I think we would all destroyed if we had been acting in the 80s. Lord knows I'd be dead. Oh, I would be dead too. 100%. Face down somewhere. Never found. Never found. No, no, no, no. Or like found, but like, they're like, we don't know. I feel like you're both thriving in our current times. Thank you. Everything's canceled now. Things are canceled, but I'm saying that I think you both you all the work. You're both great. Thank you. You're both talented. Thank you. I just don't need to get. Yes, there was more. There was a fucking bigger. There was more money in the fucking 80s and 90s. Like if you wrote on fucking suddenly Susan, you bought yourself a house and a guest house. Those days are gone.

Long gone. Now every their everything's union minimum and they're they're fucking it's a race to the bottom and we're scrambling for, you know, making our weeks so we can get our health insurance. Yes, that's what the current climate is in the entertainment industry. But still, despite all those challenges and limitations, you two are thriving. You're doing great. You're on TV. You're in movies. Thank you. Is one of the things on your list, bum the audience out at any given moment? Dear Lord. No, I know that I'll do that instinctively. That's just my go to move. We had a little so we had shifting topics. We had we talked about we touched on Thomas, our Uber driver. You were also in this Uber, a charming man, a delightful

gentleman. So he had a he told a long anecdote about his cousin befriending Jimmy Buffett himself. Yeah. But I'm trying to like, like, what was there? We told him I was like, I was like, you got like the way worse version of that story that you can tell your cousin that you met the dope. He's been waiting for years to one up him. He'll lie about the line. That's really I gave a ride to some big podcasters who Joe Rogan, Yeah, Ralphie May. Sorry. There's a chance he thought that is who we were. Rest in peace, Ralphie. RIP. Let's talk about Good Times burgers and frozen custard.

Yeah. Seems to be popular here in Denver. So the same company also owns bad daddy's burger bar. Do people like bad daddies? Bad daddies. Yeah, our lift driver on the way here. He was really selling big daddy. He was or bad daddies, bad daddies. He was like, he was like, yeah, you have a good time at Good Times, but you want to be bad, go to bad daddies. Yeah. It seemed like he worked for somebody who I had no idea. I don't know. I thought bad daddies was the prequel to bad grandpa. That was better than you guys thought of us. I don't mean to yell at the audience, but What is, who is bad daddy? I don't know. It's a little too. Oh, it's big daddy.

It is big daddy. No, it's bad daddy. The burger is big daddy. The restaurant is bad daddy. There's one right out there. Someone go find out. Bad daddies. Bad daddies. You're all talking at once. Bad daddies. It's bad daddies. The restaurant is bad daddies. The burger is big daddies. No, it's bad daddies. They have a big daddy. Yeah, look it up. You got the internet. I'm gonna look it up. Oh god, here we go. Bad daddies. There is one across the street. Yes, the one across the street is bad daddy's burger bar. He's on the website. Look, you can shout corrections if you must. No, in fact, don't do that. But if you're gonna do it, at least be correct.

Yeah, come correct. Come correct. Give me a fucking Glenn Kessler Pinocchio when I was right. I don't need that centrist crap. So Mackenzie from Comedy Works South here said that they had they ever done. Sorry, never mind. What are you gonna say? No. Have they ever done a Pinocchio porno? Oh, you know it. They have to. Of course they have. It's perfect. But have they done it? Yeah, they've done it. They must have. The creative decision to make the creative decision to make with when you're dealing with a Pinocchio porno is are we going to do some sort of nasal penetration or is it going to be that lies make his lies make his dick get bigger? I think the second is maybe a little less on the nose part in the pun. But perhaps more satisfying. Can I be

honest with you? Yeah, regret bringing it up. I bet they had there's a Pinocchio porno. I know that because I own Edward Penis hands. The Edward Scissorhands parody. Now you might be thinking Edward Penis hands and you're picturing someone whose digits have been turned into Penises much like the they're turned into blades and Edward Scissorhands. No, his hands are each one big gross looking fleshy dildo. Don't watch that. Yeah, I don't like it. It's not good. I continue to own as a novelty. But wait, I'm my last question is you didn't watch this last night at the air bnb, did you? No. All right, good. But yeah, it's the I'm sure there's a Pinocchio porno. There has to be. Well, I'll Google it. Okay, I'm gonna go. All right, it's up. He's pushed play. And he's watching.

The issue here is that it's just getting me to like Pinocchio porn on FAP 18 HD to so I think there's just a lot of Pinocchio porn, but maybe not one definitive parody. So I guess there that's two Pinocchios from Glenn Kessler. So we had a so anyway, but Kenzie from County Works South here said that they make their own pickles in house, which is interesting. Yes, they're good pickles. The location we get to did not have a dining room. I understand a lot of them do, but we ate at tables outside. Our server, man, I felt bad for her. She was clearly very stressed out. Yeah, we did order about, oh, sorry. No, it just it felt as though she was in a tornado. I get one point, I'm like, are those sticks in your hair? Where did that come from? She was very flustered. Yeah, it was like

she was very flustered. She was doing triage at a battlefield hospital. She was just like losing her mind over everything. And I felt bad for her. And then the F5 rolled in, which is us. We ordered a lot of things. We ordered $60 worth of food. We ordered a good amount of food at a place that's pretty good for stretching your dollar. I will say that she was very stressed out. She was lovely. She helped us out. However, this did lead to an incident where our Mark and Haley here, Mark and Haley, you guys are here. We met you at good times. Look, so this is you're a fall wager. I blame the altitude. I accidentally, here's the here's the here's what's going on. Just tell them what happened. Here's what's happening. I'll get my side of the story.

They don't have a number or name system. They just call out what you ordered. And Mark and Haley also doing a comprehensive job of tackling the menu ordered some similar items. So I heard them and I was like, that's got to be us. And I went and grabbed the bag of food and I opened it up. I started distributing items and then we realized things were little taking pictures. I realized things were a little off. And at first, again, this is this is my fault. I was, I thought that maybe I was thinking of our harried server. I was thinking of our stressed out service worker and was thinking, I bet she just forgot some items or got some things wrong. So I was turned out to be true. Yeah, turned out to be true. But I ended up accidentally having Mark and Haley's food that

I had to return to them. They were lovely about it. We were opening it. We were opening it up. Can I also say that when I saw you when you took the bags, you said, Robble, Robble. So I don't know if I believe you 100% that this is a little accident. Anyway, apologize for that. So it was a little stressful. We ultimately got all our stuff. Let's start with the sweet treats because that's what we got first. I opened up their sandwich. I mean, we opened up a bunch of their sandwiches. We opened up a cup. And then I said to him, I was like, I didn't touch it. And they're like, you touched it. And I was like, yeah, I think I did touch it.

Then they were like, we want it more now. You freaks. So the sweet treats we got, we got a chocolate cookie dough spoon bender, just their version of a blizzard, and an Irish cream frozen custard, which is their seasonal custard. That was my order. The chocolate cookie dough spoon bender. I was not expecting, and this is my fault, I was not expecting chocolate ice cream. It's chocolate ice cream, cookie dough nuggets, and a bunch of, and a bunch of chocolate syrup poured on top. Speaking of nuggets, this is like Nicola Joachim style treat. So very over the top thing. Their big boy would eat. It sounded like nuggets were a separate ingredient,

just to be clear. It's not like there were chicken nuggets in this ice cream. So this was very, very heavy. A little too chocolatey for me. The bites of the cookie dough were quite nice, but I would have preferred a more neutral ice cream as opposed to the chocolate ice cream. And then the chocolate syrup on top was just over the top for me. It was thick. Very thick. It was a very thick thing. It felt as though they smushed an entire like cake into a tiny cup. Like just that kind of thick like, oh man, I'm eating cement. But it was good cement, but like, it was, it was tough. It was a spoon bender. Was a spoon bender for sure. I tell you, I consider myself the last spoon bender.

It sounds like you're booing me. We honestly, not sure if you are or not. I got the Irish cream custard. Yes. Ah, yes. Wait, what did you think of the chocolate, the chocolate? I liked it. Yeah, you liked it. It was very, it was a little too chocolatey. A little too much, right? Too chocolatey. But, but your Irish cream frozen custard. Now we're talking. That's good. Just in time for St. Patrick's Day. Yeah. You often neglect and ignore the Irish people. So I said, let's get this. This, this was right for my people and we all loved it. No one has suffered more than the Irish. The potato fan. The potatoes, man. My family is right. I'm, I've said this on the pockets. I'm

a hundred percent Irish. Right. My family were from those bogs. They were down there and those, they came from those bogs and a lot of them came over because of the potato famine. You were, the way you're saying they came from those bogs suggests there's some kind of swamp creature. I mean, yes. Your DNA test says you're 60% Irish, 40% swamp thing. Say Patrick's Day is going to be canceled because of coronavirus? Well, not the holidays going to be canceled, but some of the celebrations. That's why it won't kiss me. I'm Irish sweatshirts out. I mean, you're not going to be wanting to do it doing that this year. It's never worked any year. The Irish cream frozen custard was delightful. It was delightful. It had a great flavor to it.

I, it was just so, so good. A real highlight. And you know what? I'm introducing a new segment for this tour, Wiger's Bite of the Night. You motherfucker. Irish cream frozen custard, you win. Wiger's Bite of the Night. This was introduced by me last night in Salt Lake City. Spoon Man's Bite of the Night. You stole my idea. This is Facebook-esque. I'm the Winklevosses. What can I say? I'm a little worm. Stolen. Salt Lake City is a big mud. It's a big, the Salt Lake is a big mud lake. The actual lake is mud. Yeah. It's very gross to look at. Just thought that was some BS. I was pissed.

Yeah. And I'm so happy to be here in Denver. Fuck Salt Lake City. We also got some drinks. You know, I got an iced tea. Wait, what did you get, Betsy? I got Diet Dr. Pepper. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck yeah. I wanted to get, what are you gonna say? You got the strawberry lemonade. I got the strawberry lemonade. I wanted it for Colorado. I wanted to get Mountain Dew or Sierra Miss because I feel like it fits here. Right. Do people drink it more up here? No. You kind of shiz. We're healthy. Get out of here. We're healthy. How was that strawberry lemonade? I liked it. That was really good. It looked good. They had like some fresh, they threw the strawberries in there fresh. There were some little seeds at the bottom

and Lord knows I sucked them on up at the end. Iced tea. Nothing notable about it, but it was a solid iced tea Diet Dr. Pepper. I'm gonna say I'm mute tonight. What? I'm a little silly tonight. Yeah, you can't say you're silly totally. We should go to the Shining Hotel. Tonight. Right now. Let's do it. Let's do it. We should do it. I have a ghost hunting app on my phone. Do you really? Yeah. How does it work? I think it honestly just listens to what I say and then pops up. Like at one point it did say Taco Bell and I was like, oh, come on, man. I just downloaded it and it's telling me the ghost of Jeffrey Epstein has inhabited Weigar's body.

Wow. Oh my God. That explains everything. Guys, I got a flight to catch. RIP. I can give Malcolm Gladwell a ride somewhere. Let's get into it. I thought the drinks were fine. I thought the sweet treats were very good. I think particularly that frozen custard was just excellent. Let's talk burgers. So the Good Time Deluxe Cheeseburger and the Double Good Times Cheeseburger, those are the ones that you and I got, Betsy, and the Big Daddy, not the Bad Daddy, the Big Daddy Bacon Cheeseburger is the one that you got. I got the Big Daddy. Yeah. I'll read these descriptions real quick so you know the difference is the Good Times Burger is beef, lettuce, tomato, pickle, crisper,

onion, mayo, mustard, and ketchup. So mayo, mustard, and ketchup, the big three condiments are on there. The Big Daddy Bacon Cheeseburger is two patties, four slices of bacon, two slices of American, one slice of Swiss, and their famous dipping sauce. Oh. I feel so sick. Can you say that? Yeah. Dear God. Both very good, very heavy burgers. Yeah. They were quality burgers though. They were very good, very sloppy, and I love a sloppy burger. I love when you pick it up and you go in for that first bite and most of it squirts out. Yeah. Yeah. Now I get a fucking snorted up like a hog. Oh, yeah. I love it. I love it. These burgers felt like they had been floating in swimming pools for like 30 minutes. The bun was just, the bun was like loose. Yeah.

It was as a bun. I mean, it's like, I thought it actually held together pretty well. You mind it not as much. I liked the default burger quite a bit. You know, I don't, I don't know how I feel about ketchup on burgers in general, even though I like ketchup a lot as a condiment. I kind of feel like give me mustard, give me mayo, or give me some sort of Thousand Island sauce. Like, I feel like I'd prefer all those to ketchup. That said, this one having ketchup, I thought worked well and the ingredients were very good. Like, it felt like there was high quality product, which goes a long way. The three sauces, even though separate together were wonderful. Like, what's that? Is that kind of painting or something? What am I trying to say? Is that

kind of painting or something? What am I trying to say? You guys, this meal fucked me up. Like, my eyes keep kind of glazing over and I keep seeing how I'm going to die. I'm feeling a lot of different things. Yeah. I feel like I see my dad in the audience. It's like the end of Braveheart. He's walking closer to stage. My dad's dead for people who didn't get that joke. R.I.P. to him as well. The big big, the big daddy bacon, speaking of daddies, the big daddy bacon cheeseburger is very bacon-y.

I like the two kinds of cheese on there. The altitude made some water come out of my eyes. I'm crying because I was laughing. It was good. It was a good burger. What do you want me to say now? The burger was good. It was good. I like that sauce a lot. I think I like the sauce on this one more than the good time, like Triforce of sauces. However, I think I would get the good times more often. This is a better level of quality than Jack in the Box, even though I have personal fondness for Jack in the Box because I grew up with it. It's kind of like the Jumbo Jack versus the bacon ultimate cheeseburger. It's like the two different riffs on the core burger

concept. It's just a matter of a pick on which one you like more. I think I like the default one a little bit more, but they're both great. I feel when bacon is involved, I like to make that more of a treat and not an everyday thing because whatever, I'm fat. It's fine, but I like to think I'm a little healthier every now and then. Yeah, it's intense, but good. I got to say, as much as I did like the burgers, not my favorite part of the entire meal. Interesting. Should we get into what it is? Let's keep progressing. We also have another burger category to touch on the Bambino. People love the Bambino. I forgot about these little guys. These are their sliders. Great. A three-pack, just the cutest little things. The best.

They are adorable. They're darling. I would bring those to parties all the time. Yeah. Wait, you would? Yeah. Wow. I would just bring a bag full and be like, thanks for having me. That's got to be it. And then you leave? And then I fucking leave. Yeah, then I'm out of here, man. Thanks for having me. Thanks for having me. Was she happy to be here? She left. Oh my god, it's all just the rappers. She hates us. Oh my god. Remember the lady at the airport hated me? Oh yeah, she hated you. Wait, why was that? Mitch left his bag on like. Because we were so far back in line, I had to check my bag. Yes. And I left and then I went to go pee. I left you on the plane. And then I came back to get my bag, but the door was closed. We should reenact it.

I'll be the lady. You be you. Great. Hey, how you doing? And that happened for like 30 seconds. She's scrubbing down the scanner thing. She was scrubbing down everything. She was very afraid of Corona for sure. Yeah. I left my bag, my carry on. They checked it and I left it on the plane. I think they put it down at the end of the runway. Okay. So should I like go get it? No. Okay. What kind of bag was it? An away blew away bag. Okay. You stink like shit. Now, everything was pretty accurate until the stink like shit, but she was in a bad mood. You did that perfectly. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah. That was very good. It was startling,

watching her be so upset. I must have reminded her of someone from her past, some poor soul, whoever that is. I looked like maybe, I don't know. She hated me more than anything. Yeah. Boy. And God bless. I mean, and also the lady who helped us out. It's a, it's tough job. You got to deal with a bunch of shit. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. She might have just assumed you were a shit head, but you're not. You were just like, uh, you just need your bag. Sometimes people, when you, they're like, like, oh, this person's asking for something like, okay, what now? Yes. They have that, that I feel like I get that a lot. I did ask if they had any extra spare peanuts from the flight. So what do you do with all the packets that still have

peanuts in them? Cause I'll take care of them dude. Yeah. Come on. Give them to me. That's what Betsy came out shaking her. Flip her upside down. Go. Peanuts fall out. Hey, we knew it. The bambinos are beef, cheese, pickle and bambino sauce. Whatever bambino sauce is, I guess different as opposed to their famous dip and sauce. It felt, it felt like, it doesn't bambino may mean baby. Yeah. So it's baby sauce. That's sick. It's fucking sick blue state shit. You legalize weed and then they start serving bambino sauce. It was good though. These were, these were tasty. They were really good. In my head,

I felt bad that like if the chef saw me eat that burger, he spent so much more time on it and it was gone in like two seconds with me. Right. It just made me feel bad that it was just getting vacuumed down my throat. Yeah, you did just breathe in and it just sucked up. I was like, the altitude here is pretty, I just sucked it in mid sentence. That's pretty good. There is some, there's some art to crafting the amuse-bouche, the one bite that is like, you know, and then that's kind of what this is. It's, I feel like this is for me, but being a man with a, with this giant mouth, it was like, this was like a one or two biter, but it's a, two bites comfortably. I could do it in one bite if I wanted to impress somebody.

Weigherr has a huge mouth. He also revealed the other day, he has a huge tongue. I do have a JTM. Show them your tongue. Why do I have to do this? Just do it. Okay. It's insane. It's a huge tongue. Okay. Here's my mouth. And then here's my tongue. And then do a profile. Do a profile. Do a profile. Stick it out now. Okay. Okay. All right. Here's a profile. Here's the PBS logo version. Holy shit. It's huge. I'm going to wear that thing around my neck one day.

I like the bambino a lot. Might have been my favorite burger, honestly. It just like the balance of ingredients. I don't usually love sliders, but the balance of ingredients here worked really well. Oh, you loved it. I thought you were saying you didn't like it. No, I liked it quite a bit. Oh, wow. All right. I thought it was great. And then we, that brings us to the Spicy Chicken Sandwich. Very good. We got, so we were told to get this from someone. Oh, you're probably here. Thank you. Thank you. Someone tweeted us. You got to get the Spicy Chicken Sandwich. It's really good. Yeah. We didn't write your name down or anything. We didn't write your name down. But this count, this still counts as a shout out, so you should be grateful. Yeah.

I want to read the copy for the Spicy Chicken Sandwich. Here's the copy from their menu. You want the heat? Can you handle the heat? Order one of these and prove it. To which I say, who the fuck do you think you're talking to? Yeah. I'm something of a heat seeker and so I was more than more than prepared for this bad guy, bad boy. I will say this. This one's, and it's very simple. It's a breaded spicy chicken breast, lettuce, tomato, and mayo. Although I think we got pickle instead of tomato on ours. Oh yeah, we did. We didn't have tomato. It was spicy. But it was, so it was more of a, it was less Wendy's, more Chick-fil-A, but it was fucking great. It was really good. Better than Chick-fil-A Spicy Chicken. Yeah, way better. Easy. It was actually spicy.

Yes, it was spicy. It had some real heat to it. It was good. In fact, I turned into a seat seeker after that. Toilet seat. Yeah, no, we got it. Yeah, we got it. We got it. We knew it. We knew it. Really, really nice balance of ingredients here. The chicken was good quality and like we mentioned, good heat. And the mayo cut in the heat a little bit is just like, that's what I want from a spicy chicken sandwich. It was really good. It's delightful. And then that brings us to our sides. So again, we had a little bit of a, of disarray with our order. They forgot our natural fries at first. We had to go back there and ask for our natural fries. And the other, another item that they forgot are green chili potato poppers, which they, they, they prepared for us. Again,

it was a crisis. But they made them for us and, and we, we are very thankful for that. We also got the beer battered onion rings and the wild fries, which are very well known. The wild fries apparently were taken off the menu briefly. Wow. And then the fans revolted and forced them to bring with a wildfire, wild fries back. Yeah. It was like a new Coke situation. Wow. Why would they do that? I don't know. Sometimes these brands overthink it, or sometimes they just get bored. They're just like, you know what, we've been doing this for a while. It's time to shake things up and they don't need to shake things up. No. I'm concentrating on my breathing up here. Have we gotten that? Was we higher than normal?

Dear Lord, I'm going to be fine. No, I, I, I feel similarly lightheaded. And it's not just the glass of Pinot Grigio I drank. It's that I have a, it's, I, yeah, I feel like I'm getting less oxygen. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, definitely. That's why we're not as funny tonight. Sorry. I got to tell you. Yes. The sides are fucking great at some of the best sides of all time. Dynamite sides. They're great. So good. Wonderful side country. It's great. Great sides. Those jalapeno potato poppers. Holy shit. I was like, I need the recipe for Thanksgiving. Like this is, it's so delicious. Yeah. So they're made with, with green chilies, which I understand are popular in the, in here in the other four corner states.

I've got a lot of great green chili and red chili and, and New Mexico. I don't know if you guys love or hate New Mexico, whatever. Okay. Seems a little mixed. These are very, so these are, these are, these are poppers that have potatoes, creamy cheese, and green chilies inside of them. They're, they're similar to an Arby's item that, that makes them with, Arby's makes them with jalapenos and both of them. Okay. So we know how you feel about Arby's. Arby's makes them with jalapenos and they serve it with their Bronco berry sauce, which is one of the weirdest dipping sauces in a fast food restaurant. They also have a, of a berry dipping sauce here I learned later after we developed, but we didn't get it. We just got, we just ate these bad boys dry.

That's fine. I think that might have killed that lady if we asked for some sauce. We're going to sauce now, but I finally gave you your food. She was great. She was great. She was great. She was very nice about everything too. She was very nice. I came, when I came back to tell her, she was like, Oh no, what happened again? Very funny. She's a Kathy cartoon. I'm going to tell all of this to Irving. Like what? Of course, you know, Kathy's husband's name. Is that who it is that Kathy's husband? They were, had an off, on and again, off again, fling.

But in the final Kathy comic strip, they finally tied the knot. They fuck. And they fuck. They tied the knot in panel two and panel three is just hardcore penetration. Up close, they're just like, Can I? Dear Lord, I know my sister's in the audience. She is very lovely lady. Sweet. And I was like, we're like, have you listened? We say bad stuff. I think she said, I listened to small parts of an episode.

Which is, I didn't see that she shouldn't even have done that. Can I tell you an awkward teenage thing? Sure. Of course. I remember, Oh God. I remember getting turned on at her of roses rose strip one day. I looked at a roses rose comic strip and I got a boner. Wow. When I was like 16 or so. 16. Maybe 15. I don't know. Prime boner time, right? Was it, this was a thing where she just like the way her boobs were drawn or something. Yeah. All of a sudden did it for me with roses rose. It just worked.

I'm sure there's some roses rose hentai if you Google it, if you want to relive that. Don't put that thought into my head. Saying rule 34, I'm sure roses rose stuff is out there. Fine. I'll Google it tonight. So the onion rings I thought were very good, not particularly seasoned, but they were, but they had a great breading to them. They were like those, those littler rings. They weren't those big sprawling rings. They were those tight little rings with a lot of batter on them. Yeah. And, and, you know, intact. They, they did well with, you bite through them.

Again, this was a thing we, we dealt with with crown burgers and salt. Like I said, he similarly succeeded that the, that you bite into it and the onion string doesn't come out. It stays intact. Yes. I was calling it the hot slug on your chin. It was when that thing comes up, falls on your chin. Right. That's terrible. You don't want that. These were great. These were awesome. I loved them. Yeah. I thought, I thought they were very good. I didn't dislike a single side. I didn't like, dislike a single side. Single side. I liked the green chili potato poppers, as we mentioned, the wild fries.

At first I was like, Oh, this fuck, these own. I was like, so into them. And then it took a few more bites. I was like, there might be a little bit too much going on here because they're breaded and they're seasoned. But then I came back to them. I was like, no, these are good. I like these. And again, to, to think of Jack in the box, they're curly fries or Arby's curly fries are analogs for this. They are the, the, these breaded seasoned fries. But I think these are like a, just a better version. They're just like very good. Yeah. So as I mentioned, she forgot our natural fries. We went back there and the fries we were given were not the natural fries. They were. So I'm calling them natural fries. That's what

they are on the menu. Natural fries. Really? They're natural fries. Stop saying it. If you want a large, you asked for some big naturals. They ended up giving us criss-cut or waffle fries. Okay. That's right. So they, so they've changed the fry form factor to a waffle now. I guess that's, that's something they've done in recent years. This was a fucking great. God, it was so good. Better than Chick-fil-A's waffle fries. Better than Chick-fil-A's waffle fries. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. For sure. They were so good. Salty and, and just perfectly salty. And they were like hot out of the fryer and well fried. I was just like, these are fucking dynamite.

I love them. Is, is good times open on Sunday? Take a hike, Chick-fil-A. Come on. I have a, I have a quick pitch. Yes. And you may think I'm disgusting after I say it, but hear me out. No, never. A bowl of those onion rigs. So far, I like it. Okay. Okay. And then pour ranch on them and eat it like cereal. And I'm thinking cereal that you want to keep crispy. So not an insane amount of ranch. Right. But yeah, I mean, I would do probably a fork, but just a thought. Just a thought. Absolutely. Think about it. Absolutely would work with some. This should be served in every house in America for breakfast.

Eat shit, Wheaties. Onion rings with ranch now. Yes. Yes. Really, the sides are great. The sandwiches were, were very good. You know, we had a discussion and we should, we should, we should get to our final thoughts here in one moment. But we, we had a discussion of is this place better than Crown Burgers, which is what we had in Salt Lake City. I'm sure there's some interstate rivalry between the people of Colorado and the people of Utah. I would say no, you guys just, you guys just, you guys just don't even care about them. That's sad. We know who won that battle. We were there last night. But I will say that I think we all came on the side of this is better than Crown Burgers, right?

Isn't it? It's just better. Crown Burgers is good. We like Crown Burgers. No disrespect to Crown Burgers. And guys, we gave a pretty good review to Crown Burgers. We did get pretty good reviews to Crown Burgers. What does that portend for this chain? We will find out now. We'll each go around and give our final assessment, our closing argument, if you will, and end with a fork rating. Yes. Betsy Sedaro. Okay. So I grew up going to good times. One opened up in Silverthorn. Our friend's dad owned the gas station and then they turned it into a good times. And I remember being like, he fucking owns a good times. That's the greatest job in the world. There is still, sorry, real quick, there's still a part of me that I kind of want to get like

a very part time job at a Taco Bell. I can just work the window and just be like, yeah, yeah, thanks for ordering. I think it would be so fun. Maybe I'll try that. Anyways, I grew up there and I loved it. I always loved it. The French fries blew my mind because I think it was the first time besides Arby's where I was like, whoa, really fun season fries. Holy shit. And today it tasted the exact same, which was great. Like the nostalgia there was just, it made me so happy. You took a bite at one point and said, I remember this. And I was just like, oh, that was a beautiful moment. I remember it, man. So I give it five. Five forks. I love it. It's the fucking best. Wow. Yeah.

I don't know if Crown Burgers has anything on good times. Unless you're like an alt-right person and then the crowd there, you'll probably enjoy. Very Aryan. Very. Lots of, lots of blondes. Um, we had a lovely time in Salt Lake. We did. We had a great time in Salt Lake. It's fun to make fun of it once you leave though. Um, look, I had a lot of firsts here in this city. And let me tell you, the most pleasurable first for me was my first time at Good Times. No doubt in my mind. We all left happy. Absolutely. We enjoyed ourselves. We took our time.

We were all very satisfied. I didn't go into the bathroom at one point and go, come on, this is your chance. Don't blow it. True story. Wow. Uh, they say for, oh God, I'm going to get it wrong. For a good time at a great place at Mcdonald's. Is that what it is? I don't know. At Mcdonald's. For a good time. I don't know. You don't know what I'm talking about? Are you thinking about like some lascivious message scrawled in a bathroom wall? People know that. Is that the McDonald's song? Oh, I'm loving it took over. Everyone forgets the old one. There was, there was a something like, there was Have Your Break Today

that was, but predating that there was some sort of. My closing line doesn't make any sense anymore. Wiger. Okay. Can I, can I pitch something? Yeah. A Safty Brothers movie. Good time. You know what, just like the show Good Time and from Wiger's intro, it was Dino Mike. Five Forks for me. Yeah. Five Forks. Gotta be. Wiger. Uh-oh. Don't blow it for us. Uh-oh. The pressure's on. Uh-oh. So it falls to me. I gave, I gave Crown Burgers four Forks. Just a little bit more. I also gave Crown Burgers four Forks. Crown Burgers joined the Golden Plate Club. The question becomes, as I've already said,

this is better than Crown Burgers. We know as a baseline, I gave Crown Burgers a four, liked Crown Burgers. I think, I think the thing that maybe has over the Euro sand, which is excellent. They don't have anything like that on this menu. And then the, I like their on-earrings a little better. I did. But that said, everything at good times delivered. The sweet treats were great. Really, really good. That was like, this was like, I realized like, this is Colorado's Culvers. This is in the same way that Midwest people feel is such a, such an allegiance to Culvers. It's the same sort of thing here. They've got good burgers and great frozen desserts at a, at a value price. And I get why people have a

fierce allegiance to it. It's very, very good. Everything delivered. So it comes down to, does this place belong in the Golden Plate Club or the Platinum Plate Club? Does it have what it takes to get that third set of five forks, or will it fall somewhat short? And I will say, a noble cause that falls somewhat short, much like the Bernie Sanders campaign, four and a half forks. Oh my God. For good times burgers and frozen custard. Very good, but not quite a leak. He means five. Four and a half forks. Welcome to the Golden Plate Club. Good times burgers and frozen custard. Do you, oh man, you're going to get killed. What can I say? I'm a little word.

Do you know how the story I told about how I felt when I saw that roses rose cartoon? That's how Weigher got when you all booed him. He loved it. Guys, that was our view of good times where we had a very good time. It is time for a segment. I've got a mystery beverage and Mitch and Betsy must divine what it is. It's the Weigher challenge. And to the stage, our engineer Emma Erdbrink, big hand for Emma. Emma has brought two glasses of some beverage. All right. Tell us, let us know what you are looking at and describe. Please no help from the audience. I mean, it's a beer, a light beer, light crisp. I have a gas. Oh, talking to the microphone.

I've only been doing this for 15 years. I have a guess. It's a course. You're guessing your guess is straight cores. Do you want to lock that in before you're tasting it? Coors light is kind of good too. Betsy says Coors light. They are both taking their first sips right now. An audience member is imploring them to chug it. They both... I can't breathe. They both started to chug it, got about a third way brew. It was so hard to do. I can chug a beer. Oh, God. Brew it.

Don't kill yourself for this. It's not worth it. I would die for that. Wow. Mike Mitchell just chugged the remainder of his beer. Coors light. Absolutely. Coors light. You have both guessed Coors light. You have co-won the Weiger challenge. That is correct. I can't believe you chugged that. Good job. I mean, it's obvious, but I don't know. What else are we going to do? Coors on the show. We're in Denver. Why not? Well, nod to the silver bullet. I've gotten to the brewery and it's really fun.

Oh, that sounds like a treat. Yeah. They like let you just wander around. I was like expecting a tour and stuff and they're just like, go and here's some tokens to get beer. It was awesome and you get to like taste the freshest Coors. Like literally, I don't know, they were just like, nobody has ever like been near this and I loved it. It was great. Do you have? Do you guys have that beer? I just want to say people are giving it too hard of a time to trump. Oh, no. Fire thing's hard to handle. It's not his style, man. Oh, I'm going to burp. Yeah. Into the mic.

Oh, God. Mitch appears to have nearly puked. I'll fine. But you guys have a favorite Coors varietal? Coors light. You like, you straight, you like Coors light. So Betsy, you were drinking a banquet up top or backstage earlier. Yeah. I like the little bottles. Those are cute. They're also really fun to shatter. They are very fun to chug it and then just slam it on the ground. I don't do that as much as I used to, but it really helps if you're feeling frustrated or something, drink a beer and then go shatter it. I highly recommend it. I swear this is the truth. The first time I ever got drunk was with Coors beer. Wow.

Ten for Colorado. Yeah. And maybe I'll die here. That freak wants my corpse. Buffalo Bill is here. I need a sleeping bag. Guys, those are why your challenge just like a restaurant fire feedback. Let's open up the feedback. We're going to take three questions from the audience right now. I want to give a shout out to Jesse, who's in the audience. Go ahead, Mitch. Jesse, his wife couldn't make it. He had to come alone and I want to give a shout out to Jesse. Thank you for your service. Thank you, Jesse. He's a veteran. They had to come solo. Thank you, Jesse. Are you here? Did you come, Jesse? Oh, he's there. All right. Hell yeah. Thank you, Jesse. Thank you, Jesse. Thank you

for your service, bud. Another person given an obstructed view of the show. Sorry about that Trump joke. Guys, so we've got a few questions that Emma is going to. I shouldn't have chugged that beer. Yeah, you really shouldn't have. Chugged those. I know. I feel loopy now. Let's get the show over with quickly. Yeah. You have three strong both sides waiting for you. Don't stop. Let's stop this. Stop peer pressuring this man in his mid to late 30s into chugging alcohol. Because I will do it till I die. He will do it. He will do it because he wants your approval. It's all I ever wanted. He doesn't know that's not going to fix the hole in his soul. I was born with that hole. Is that correct? Yeah, I think so. So Emma, where are you?

Emma's right over there. Emma, who's got her first question? I got Kevin, Daniel, Spencer, Vogel, and Katie Smith. Okay. If you want to make your way here. Okay. If you guys want to work your way over to Emma in the corner. So we get someone from the front row working their way back there. And then when you take the mic, tell us your name and then go ready to your question. Hey guys, this is Kevin. How's it going? Hi. So as you mentioned up top, coronavirus is in the news. So what beverage would have a disease and what would the symptoms be? Oh, okay. What? Oh, what beverage beverage would have a disease and what the symptoms be? Well, I mean, like, you know, in a way, many beverages have collectively have a disease, diabetes.

All the liquid sugar that is being consumed in this country leads to adult onset, diabetes. All right, bumming us out again. Milk. Milk kind of has a disease. A lot of people are lactose intolerance, but a new one, a new one we would come up with. How about Dr. Pepper? It has Dr. Pepper in the disease. It has irony. Irony. I was going to say martini and Alzheimer's. Interesting. Oh, that's good. That just kind of makes sense. Kind of an A to C, but yeah, I get it. I don't understand the question. Hey, I don't know what we're doing. Kombucha? That has shit floating in it, right? Yeah, that one does. A bacterial infection would

make sense with kombucha. I did have kombucha once and I felt like I was going into anaphylactic shock. It had a bad reaction to it. I was like, none of this again. I think it was like whatever the fucking yeast in it or whatever, my body was not prepared for it. I had that once when I had something that had some kind of corn mold, which I guess is an okay thing to eat, but it just You were drinking it though? No, it was like it was like it dusted with some sort of corn mold. It was like a fancy dish. It was a great toqueria. Jesus, don't get that dish. Do you have a drink answer or no? I'm starting to get very drunk. Oh, yeah, I had a drink answer. What if water made you dehydrate it? All right, next question. I think you got booed.

What's up, dude? What's going on? What's your name again? Spencer. Hi, Spencer. I asked this before. I didn't know you guys were going to talk about this, but if you were to be a victim of Hannibal Lecter, what dish would you want him to make out of a body part of yours? Wow. He asked this just assuming we would talk about Silence of the Lands at some point. The answer is which one of our body parts would you like him to make into a dish? Which one of our own body parts would you like? Yeah, if he was going to capture you and make a dish out of you, what would you want it to be? Oh, cool. Nachos. Like, make skin chips. And deep fry those. And then my meat is, I guess my fat.

What? Rest in peace, horny for horror. And then just classic nacho toppings. Right. You know? Yeah, sure. What do you like on your nachos? You like beans? Yes. So beans, what else? Beans, like pico de gallo. Oh, hell yeah. And then sour cream, guacamole. Those two separate dollops. Yeah, just a thunk, thunk, thunk. I love it. Oh man, we need to get nachos and I'm full. I would like to be just dressed in spatchcocked, like a rotisserie chicken. My entire... What's my answer? Like roasted on a spit. I would want an apple stuck in my mouth and I'd be a spit, like a big pig. Yeah. Like a Hawaiian luau. My hog could be a very small appetizer. And a moose-boosh, if you will. And a moose-boosh.

But a big, yeah, on a spit. I think that's how I'd want to go. I think, yeah, I'd like to have my whole, I mean, like, you know, my innards taken out, my head chopped off and discarded. Oh, I got another one. You're going to like this. Yes. A Michigordita crunch. I'm going to kill you tonight and make that. That's a good one. That would be, yeah. Yeah, I want my meat to just be a Taco Bell forever. Can you put that in your living will? I feel like Taco... I feel like Yum Brands would be okay with that. Right? Yeah, sure. Okay, I'm going to work on that. Great question. That was a great question. That was an awesome question. Thank you, Spencer. One more question. All right, so why... So, yeah, this is a question and more of a scheme by Mitch.

This is a little scheme by me, Mitch. A scheme. You got a scheme worked up. Katie messaged me earlier today. Yes, I did. Hold on a second, everyone. And there's a little plan here. Katie, tell us what's going on. Um, well, double read. I also am a double read. Wow. And it was a bassoonist. Wow, very cool. For a long time. And? And I do own a bassoon. That's right. And I brought it here. That's right. And I was just wondering if you would play it for us. And Katie, we talked about this before. You washed the reeds in mouthwash before the show. Yes, I did. Katie, do you make your own reeds? Yeah, I used to. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Boy, that was the part where I checked out. I hated it. My bassoon teacher was like, I have to do some wood carving. I'm

like, I don't want to do this fucking Boy Scout shit. I'm fucking out. That's probably the point at which I was like, I'm not going to do this as a career. It's terrible. Yeah, I don't want to fucking be whittling reeds all the time. What are you fucking doing? I can't buy something off a shelf. I'm going to become a fucking craftsman to play this goddamn instrument. Guitarists have to like make their own picks. No, they don't. They don't have to weave their own strings. What the fuck is this? Kind of instrument is this. Preach. I probably couldn't play it anymore. I can try. I mean, I can try, but I don't... I'm going to walk Katie around. We'll be right there. Okay. I seriously don't think I have the

muscle memory to even remember the fingerings. You can, you'll figure the fingerings out. Thank you, Katie. Thank you, Katie. Katie was the perfect scheme. Wow. What a scheme. Here's the thing about... Can I request Kevin's Country, the ending song to the Tonight Show? Maybe you can find me a tablature. I could try to play it. You can find it on there, can't you? I don't... So the thing that's unique about the bassoon, we're going to see it busted out. Katie is walking up here. By the way, I have some Katie's in my past, so I was a little afraid this would be someone I know, but thankfully it isn't. That worked out. Yeah, as soon as it was Katie, I was like, uh-oh, but that'll work. This is great. This worked out great. So we...

Katie's in your past sounds very Buffalo Bill. You thought the FBI was here? I heard some Katie's in my past. Okay, so Katie is taking out all the different components. I think the first one is, let's see, this looks like this is going to be a little read thing. Yeah, so I'm going to hold up these bassoon reads, and as you guys can see... Oh god, this is backfired on me now. They are kind of a trapezoid shape that goes into a little rounded end here. Are these all the same intensity or any of these harder than others? What's like the softer read? Because I don't know if I can play on a harder read at this stage. My embouchure is busted.

The hell are you talking about? So your embouchure is the way your mouth forms around the read or the mouthpiece if it's a single read instrument. Okay, she's going to soak these. This is an important part of the process. I'm forgetting this, but I'm remembering it now. You have to soak the read. You can't just lick it and stick it. You got to let it get moist for a little bit. Let me see if I can remember how to assemble a bassoon. Mitch, Betsy, you guys can take over the iteration. So it comes in a different, in a bunch of different, you know, like mini pieces. Let me see if we can turn this around. This looks like a valuable bassoon. It is. Okay, I'll try to treat it with kid gloves. Go ahead, Mitch. This scheme is now a scheme on me. All right, he's got the

bassoon out on the table here. Oh no, he's putting it down below. Putting it down. It's a lot of parts. Wow. This feels like something from Survivor. This is like a, you're like a chunky Mr. Wizard. A Mr. Blizzard, have you? You're doing great so far. Yep, you got it. All right, he's putting this together here. The between the legs is a really good move. It totally does. An old timey musket. Look at this thing. You used to play this thing? Wow. And you still play it. Katie, is that correct? Kind of, sort of, yeah. Not as much, but...

So as you guys can see... Someone said not after today, I agree. Hold it by here. Yes. This is really loose. Got it. This is, I'm holding it by the single piece. Katie is informing me. I was holding it by the... So as you can, as you guys can see, it's got this big single body at the bottom that turns into two pieces that goes up into this big horn end up here. This is the fucking thing you played? Yeah, and then it attaches to this metal piece, which is what attaches to the reed. This is dorkier than I could have ever imagined. As you can see, this is like the height of a small man. It's a very tall instrument. It looks like you have Gandalf staff. It is very Gandalf-y.

Wow. What do you think, Betsy? I just, how did someone think of this? It's so weird. It's very weird. It's very, it's like, it seems straight out of the Susical musical. Very Susical. Okay. So right here, this is what I have attached. This is the seat strap. And this is the difficulty of this instrument is there isn't a great way to hold it if you're not seated. I have a, I have a harness if you want to play it standing up. Wiger's now wrapping the strap around his neck. Throwing it over a rafter. Oh, okay. Do you want a stand or sit? Let's bring this, I'll bring this chair around and then we can, and then I can sit.

Thank you so much for your help, Katie. Big hand for Katie, everyone. Thank you. You rule, Katie. We really pulled it off. I mean, this is insane. My goal is to play a single note because I don't know if I can remember any fingerings. Play Kevin's country. Mitch, you got to give us something other than dead air. This is a podcast. Okay. I'm having fun. Betsy. I'm blown away right now. I've never seen a thing like this. What if he plays it and we all orgasm?

He's going to play the white note. Shit. Get ready, everyone. Do you want a hand dress too? Were you a hand dressed guy? I didn't usually use a hand dress, but you know what? I'll try it. Oh my God. Why not? Yes. Hey, color has the place for first times, eh? Somehow I'm still dorkier and you're holding the bassoon. All right. Here we go. Here we go. Give it up for Katie and give it up for Wives. I don't have the reed attached yet. I don't have the reed. Are you ready? He's not really soaked yet. Give me the reed. The reed has been soaking.

Can you give me a pretty soft boy? Yeah. Reminds me of my first time in Denver. Give it a good crow. Oh. All right. Wow. Okay. So for people listening, that was just me blowing into the reed itself. You can buzz your lips and make a sound from just the reed. It's an interesting thing about the bassoon and other double reed instruments. Okay. Here's another thing about the bassoon. It has many thumb keys. Dear God. So most woodwinds have a single or two thumb keys. This is how we're going to get people to leave, by the way.

The bassoon has an astonishing 13 thumb keys that you play with your left and right hand. It uses many of the skills that might be needed as a gamer. You know, you got to jump from the A to the B to the X, the Y button. On most other instruments, it's like an old 8-bit Nintendo controller. You just got the A and the B to worry about. Wives, do you need me to hold this microphone or what? What's that? Do you need me to hold the microphone?

Okay. I'm going to tuck the microphone into my fanny pack. Oh my. Yeah. You've transcended to the nerdiest man. You're playing the bassoon and your microphone is in your fanny pack. It's working. It's working. How does Kevin Countries go? Hum me a little, Kevin's country. Wow.

Hey, everybody. God, I'm rusty as shit. Thank you, everybody. Jesus fucking Christ. Thank you, Katie. That's our show. Thank you, Denver. Guys, give it up for Katie.

Give it up for Betsy Zanaro. Give it up for Katie. Betsy Zanaro. Emma, her break. I know next time we'll just move on. My picture on the board for Happy Eden. See, everybody. Thank you, Denver.

Thank you. On the next Doe Boys Double, Happy Bunny Day. We talk our experiences playing through recent Nintendo Switch community building sim, Animal Crossing, New Horizons. Hear us discuss the game that recreates a remarkable experience of going outside. Get the Doe Boys Double every Tuesday only at Patreon.com slash Doe Boys.