Doughboys - HomeTown Buffet with Toni Charline

Episode Date: September 7, 2017

Actress and comedian Toni Charline (UCB, Funny or Die) joins the ‘boys to discuss childhood buffet stories, the limits of eating other people’s leftovers, and more, before delving into their visit to all you care to eat chain HomeTown Buffet. Plus, an all new segment tasting Nordic treats in Iceland Is Your Land. Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

60939AD That's the distant year the Westinghouse Time Capsule is scheduled to be unearthed and opened. Buried 50 feet below ground outside the town of Flushing, the capsule, named for the electric company that sponsored it, was created for the 1939 World's Fair in New York, and entombed as a branded gift to whoever occupied Earth 5,000 years in the future. The fair was famously commemorated in E. B. White's rhapsodic essay The World of Tomorrow, which described an elaborate interactive exhibit named Futurama that took wild swings at predicting

the next 50 years, automated cars taking hairpin turns at 100mph, and vast apple orchards growing inside biospheres. In the end, Futurama was less an accurate predictor of the future and more a primitive inspiration for Disney's Epcot Center. The fair also included a communications and business zone, which showed off IBM's fantastical electric calculator, an amusement zone, which entertained attendees with a monkey mountain comprised of 600 live primates, and a Jewish Palestine pavilion, which introduced the concept of establishing the state of Israel.

And the World's Fair also included a food zone, and among its display of mechanized milking machines and array of international delicacies, perhaps its most consequential contribution was introducing to the American consciousness the Swedish self-serve eating arrangement called the smorgasbord. As with many foreign foods, Americans adopted the smorgasbord as their own and heightened it to absurdity, and after the rationing of the Second World War gave way to a booming economy and agricultural surplus, buffets exploded in popularity across the US. The wide array of hot and cold dishes laid out in long tables and steam trays was defined

by four words, all you can eat, later reworked to all you care to eat to discourage unprofitable binging. Buffets became a staple throughout the country, as lost leaders in casinos and as budget-friendly options for working-class families and seniors, and in 1983, the trend far from over, restaurateurs Ro Hatlin and C. Dennis Scott founded Ovation Brands by opening their first buffet in Clear Water, Florida. Today, they operate over 100 all-you-care-to-eat restaurants across North America. It's impossible to predict what food culture will look like in 6939, should humanity survive,

but today, American dining has been transformed by the smorgasbord of the World's Fair of 1939. This week on Doughboys, the Ovation Brands family, Country Buffet, Old Country Buffet, Ryan's Buffet, and Hometown Buffet. Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants for a production of Feral Audio.com. I'm Nick Weiger, alongside my co-host, Dave Matthews Lap Band, the spoon man Mike Mitchell. Dave Matthews Lap Band? Yeah.

That was great to see you. If Tyler Moss, if you've got an insult you'd like me to use on Mitch at the top of the show, roastspoonman at gmail.com. Tyler Moss, your last name is Moss, you green jerk. You got him. Rack him. Go home, Tyler. You're done.

Sounds like you should move around, Moss man. Fuck this guy. I let you. You're a big DMB fan. Dave Matthews Lap Band, I like it. I get it, Nick. It's fun. Anyways, howdy ho to Spoon Nation.

I got a little drop, and Nick, it's a SoundCloud drop, so sometimes this takes a second. And guess what? I was right. It does take a second. But it will play. It will play. Howdy ho to Spoon Nation. Skill, skill, skill, me.

Let's talk about BJs. Wow. Wow. I do love BJs. Wow. Wow. Go ahead, bitch. Wow.

Because I worked in The Simpsons. Wow. Wow. Because I worked in The Simpsons. Wow. Putty sauce. I'll have water every day. Wow.

Wow. Wow. Wow. Yikes. That's... Wow. Here's the thing. Things get taken out of context on this podcast when I was referring to BJ's restaurant,

The Brew House. Are you really going to try to explore? Yes, of course. Well, I don't know. We have new listeners every week. Some people might assume that I was saying something a little civius. I just want to correct it. No.

They didn't think that for God's sake. I wasn't talking about my love of getting dome. I was talking about my love of getting pizza. No shit. Oh, God. This was from Michael Durante. Durante? I hope you dig this drop.

Mike Durante at Darth Mike's Twitter. Dropsy Davey's. He was how he labeled. And there was also like a picture of me with my mouth open. It felt very like almost like this was making fun of me and you. Yeah. It was clearly making fun of us. Yeah.

It was making fun of me for saying weird things. It was making fun of you for saying you work at The Simpsons, which you do a lot. I don't do that a lot. I think you do it a fair amount of time. I think you like do it fairly frequently enough where people have noticed that you say you work at The Simpsons. I do for all the people who might be listening for the first time. Is that your impression of me?

Yeah. My impression of you. You know, when I worked at The Simpsons, I used the brawn. The brawn sucks. Was I puking at the end? Yeah. You're throwing up. Mitch, we were we had we've had a long day.

Think about this podcast. We don't normally record. No. Full episodes. We've recorded two full episodes. So this is you can tell these are the episodes where we get cranky. We get into fights. Well, you know this.

We always start these podcasts by making excuse for why the cat. This particular episode is going to be bad. But for this one, the excuse we're making is that we've like we've recorded a lot today, but also I feel like we've eaten a lot of bad food in the past 24 hours bad in the terms of I don't want to tip what we're going to say about the this this particular restaurant bad in terms of like it's very heavy food that I feel like has made us feel I'm tired to the people. Exactly.

Yeah. The people on the message boards are giving me a hard time. You've painted. Stop reading the message boards. You've painted me at this as the Silver Spoon man. I have not painted you as the Silver Spoon man. Other people said that. I didn't say that.

These people don't last a second in Quincy, baby. What are you talking about? You gotta be cool on your feet. You gotta be cool on your feet. Yeah. What does that mean? It's a blue collar town. My man.

It's a blue. I know you keep saying that it's a blue collar town, which I like. I believe you. I believe you that they that they're blue collar people. And I like Tom Brady's my quarter of whatever. I'm not going to get into this again. Yeah. Just don't.

You just don't like. Here's the thing is that you have this whole thing. I'm trying to talk on the podcast. You don't talk on the. I don't really care about anything. That's the issue in my world. I'm trying to talk on the podcast. What is it?

Yeah. That's what this is. We have a conversation time. I know, but then they're like his opinions, Mitch's opinions on this and that people disagree with you. I know that's fine. I don't even. I'm not even that passionate about anything in my life, but you get mad when people have

a reaction when you say things incendiary all the time, you because you, you're a little needler. Here's what I know you. You're a needler. Like you're smiling right now and feel back home. I just think that people. I think people who like me need to need to rally around me. You can't.

Okay. Here's the thing. You're trying to rally the troops. You're trying to. You're trying to whip your acolytes into. There's no acolytes. You're trying to say that everyone who like is a, is a fan of yours is like, should try to like defend you.

Yeah. And I would just say like maybe stop, just stop saying stupid things. I don't say any stupid shit. You do sometimes. What do I say? That's dumb. That I like Tom Brady. I mean, that's, that's defensible.

You're a Patriots fan. Tom Brady is maybe not a great man, but he is a very good football player. I mean, it's debatable. I mean, also here's, here's another thing. Yes. I mean, you know what? I'll get in trouble, but you know what? I'm going to say it.

What? I'm going to say it. I like President Trump. No, I'm kidding. That's not what it was. What I was going to say was, I mean, like, I think people fight too much in our world right now. Do we have to judge a man based on his, because he had a, because he had that hat.

I think it's totally fair to judge someone based off of that. But like, but like, I'm watching this thing as a sport, as a sports team. Yeah. I'm saying it's fine to be a fan of him as an athlete. I think it's fine to just sort of say that, but maybe, like maybe he's not the best guy. Like I watched the James Woods movie, true believer. I'll watch his appearance on the Simpsons and be like, Oh, James Woods is a good actor. You know what?

He's good in casino, but he is a seems to be an awful man. We don't know if Tom Brady is a good or bad guy. I feel like the Pat was the one thing. And we don't really know. Also like half of our listeners, dads voted for Trump for God's sakes. Yeah. I'm sure. Yeah.

It doesn't mean that they're bad guys. They can just be uninformed. Why are you defending our listeners dads? I'm not defending them. I'm just saying that I'm just saying it's okay for me to be a fan of Tom Brady. Yeah, it is. I agree with you. It's okay to be a fan of Tom Brady.

I don't know if he is a bad guy or not. I met him. He was nice. He might, like he might be. He might have some as a, the likelihood is just by virtue of being a white male, then if you just look demographically, those are the white males are more likely to be guys like you and me are more likely to be conservative. And particularly once you start getting those upper top tax brackets, just it's more likely.

And then you've got signs like leftist babies. I know you are. So much. I know you are. But here's the thing. I'm just saying that like, if you're just, if you're just going by the statistics, the chances are that he's probably conservative. But then if you also look at the circumstantial evidence, the Patriots giving Trump a Super

Bowl ring, him having a make America great again hat in his locker, which is a very strong signifier of his political positioning, fair to infer that Tom Brady is a Trump supporter. Maybe he might be. Well, I'm just saying he might be skeptical, but I still like the guy. You can, you can. Yes. You can be a fan of his. I'm just saying that you can also acknowledge his political base.

And this craft is, by the way, craft is a Trump. He's a friend of his. Yeah. But every NFL owner is bad. Yeah. NFL owners are awful. I think sports owners in general are bad people. Yeah.

The guy for the Falcon is actually not a bad guy. I think he's. I mean, I said in general, in general, they are. Your Kobe's a bad guy too. Maybe. We don't know. Yeah. I mean, there's some things, certainly there's some things in his personal life that I think

you can't defend for Kobe Bryant. Yes. I'm still a fan of his. That's all I'm saying. That's the same thing. We have this discussion all the time. So that's, but that's, you can like Carl's Jr. Hardy's food and you don't have to like Andy Puzder, their CEO, who was a total piece of shit.

Yeah, that's true. So like that's, that's all I'm saying. Well, okay. First of all, lower your tone. You're the one who started this all riled up. Don't put this on me. We've been talking for way too long. She'll, she'll come in on my side.

She's a fan. I'm real quick. I'm a fan of hers. Real quick. We've got live shows in the Pacific Northwest in October in Texas and in, I'm sorry, we've got live shows in the Pacific Northwest in October and Texas in November, December dates and tickets at feral audio dot com slash dough boys. Right now.

Let's introduce our guest. She's been sitting there very, very, very patiently as you, as you're wasting your time. I didn't even say anything stupid. You didn't still didn't bring up anything stupid. I said, but go ahead and introduce our guest from funnier die in the birthday boys. Tony Charlene is here. Hi, Tony. Hi guys.

Welcome to the show. Thank you. It's a, it's a true honor and, and a pleasure to be here. I'm a huge fan. We're very excited to have you. You, you, you are one of, you are actually are a person who's always been very nice to me, Tony. You're very funny.

I've known you for a very long time. That's true. Uh, probably, I guess, I, well, I guess I probably knew of you, Nick. But when we were at UCB together, uh, I remember when you came in with, uh, bet you and Betsy Sidero did stuff together. Sidero. Sidero. Sorry, Betsy.

Well, I've known you for 12 years, Betsy, and I said your last name wrong. Sidero. It's Sidero, but you also say popcorn. So I feel like it was one of those messages and it's both super funny and, and, uh, and great people. You know, here's a, here's a funny thing and I shouldn't bring this up. Do you know the perfect, the first, when I first met you, when we exchanged numbers and you got my number and what you put it in absolutely, I, I was thinking about this

the other day. I was like, what, what, what did I, like, I never have had that confidence in my life. I mean, like also it was bad, but I got Tony's number and I put in future wife. Oh boy. And I showed it to her in your phone. You say it is future wife. It's future wife. Yeah.

I thought it was a funny, you change that. You still are. Oh, great. I'm sorry. I mean, it's still not. True. It could happen. You never know.

Um, you're always, you're always very nice to me, very funny and you're, we go back a long ways. You're, you're great. You're one of the best. Oh my gosh. Truly one of my favorite people. Hell yeah. Take that.

Weiger and Weiger. I absolutely adore. God bless you. Yeah. I like it too. I'm glad you're here. We're glad you're here. This is great.

You're always so nice in the UCB hallways. Robotically saying hello to people and going home for the night and not hanging out. Yeah. Why would I hang out? What am I going to get out of that? I'll just get tired and cranky. We found out on the last episode that, um, Nick has never had a friend over to his house. Like to my current, my current place.

We haven't lived that long. Okay. But yeah, we also, we live in Santa Monica. So far away. Yeah. We're fairly remote. I questioned the other place too. But that's besides the point.

I had actually, yeah. No, I had people over to my other apartment. I definitely had people over to the apartment before that. I don't know. We don't have a lot of people. We don't have a lot of guests. We certainly have relatives over. We certainly have family.

We certainly have like friends who are outside of this UCB comedy community through which I bet so many people and which is largely cloistered on the east side of LA. I mean, the refrigerator is always over there. The AC units always. His best friend. Your family. Tony. So we're very happy to have you on the show.

We talked about some possibilities for restaurants we could visit with you and discuss. And one of the ones, one of the options was actually down to the chain we decided upon and the runner up was round table pizza. And round table pizza is a place I used to go to all the time as a kid as a, as a SoCal kid. Where you from? I, okay. So I.

Moved around a lot. Like I was born in Arizona, then we moved to Washington, then we moved back to Arizona, then we moved back to Washington. And then when I was around 16, I would say 15 or 16, we moved to Northern California. And that was my first round table pizza experience. So a lot of times been on the west coast. Yeah. I mean, it's been a long time.

So what is it? Like, what are your feelings about round table pizza? Cause this was like, for me, this was like a big parlor experience. This was like, you would eat at the round table pizza. It was like a gigantic, like bigger than a pizza hut, huge restaurant in Lakewood, California. I don't know if it's still there, but that had it like arcade games, but it wasn't, it was very much like a, it was a place for adults to hang out too.

And like, you know, get beers. It wasn't like a shakey's or a Chucky's or a Chucky's or a Chucky's or a Chucky's or a Chucky's or a Chucky's or a Chucky's or a Chucky's or a Chucky's or a Chucky's or a Chucky's or a Chucky's or a Chucky's. It was like an all ages sort of thing. So the one that, so I lived in this, like in, in Northern California, it was like, I would say it was a gated community in the Lake of the Binds. We had no business being there.

It was a nice place. I don't know how we got in. But it, but close to it were only a few things and round table was one of them. And so it was like the hangout spot. It, like people who, cause the high school was close together as well. So like people who like just turned 21 would like go there and like kind of show off that they had a, a brood dog. And they would, and I, for prom, like my boyfriend took me to this very nice place.

But we were like, oh, I don't know. This feels like, like too fancy. And so we got round table to go and ate it in the car before we went to the dance. It was, it had like different toppings. Like I wish I would have looked up a menu of like coming from like, I don't know, Washington, not that it's a two different place, but it was like the first time where it was like artisan veggies. I think that might even be like a pizza sort of place.

But it was also more expensive. Yeah. Okay. And it was again, being a poor kid that we were like, oh my God. No, it was definitely in a slightly higher price category than pizza hut or dominoes. It's, it's, it's, you know, it's not like upscale, but it's, it's, it's the thinking man chain, thinking man's chain pizza. And it's a, it's, so it's a little price here and they've got the thing I remember from,

from round table thinking man's. Yeah. Kid, I, I do want to go back. It's like classed up a little bit. People think you're like the genius of this show. God, I hate you. Thinking man's pizza. More people don't think.

Wait a minute. I didn't mean to get classes there. So, but no, it's like, it's like a slightly more expensive pizza. And, but the thing I remember from it, from a food standpoint is pretty doughy, but also it's the one place where I remember they throw, they throw a little bit of cheddar cheese in with the cheese mix. They throw mozzarella, but like you get a little bit of cheddar in there. Okay.

Yeah. And so it had like a little bit, a little bit extra bite to it. And I remember missing that when I go to some other pizza places. Normally reserved for like a cheeseburger pizza or something. They'll toss a little cheese. Right. Yeah. But that was just by default.

You get like a pepperoni za there. It's got some cheddar cheese. They thought about it and they said, let's put some cheddar cheese in. Yeah. They sure did. Yeah. I guess that's, yeah. That's where the thing.

They did. They thought, they thought about it. Well, throw on some cheddar, but you got to pay a little extra cheddar. Wow. These guys sound like genius. They really were. Yeah. Yeah.

I was a big, I was a big round table guy. You know what? I used to love their Cadillacs and dinosaurs. They had that arcade game you could play there. Oh, okay. You ever played Cadillacs and dinosaurs? I never played Cadillacs and dinosaurs. I wonder if I would recognize it if I saw it, but here's another thing.

Never been to round table pizza before. I know. We got to take you. Got to take you. I'm not a child. We can go together. You don't have to take me. We'll buckle you up.

You can put me in a booster seat. Absolutely. I wonder how you adjust around table pizza as a man with a famously rectangular table. Oh my God. Famously. You are so excited to say that. My table is, as you can see, Tony, my, my, my first thing I noticed walking in is a rectangle table.

Yeah. It's big. It takes up a lot of the kitchen. The kitchen. I mean, to be fair, the kitchen space is a square. This is a dining room. It's a dining room. Yeah.

Yeah. That's where the table should be. Yeah. I'm saying it's too big. It's like a dining look. Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

It's a nook. I guess. Yeah. Sure. But you could like, I, you could find a table that's more appropriate for this space. What are, do you? Yeah. I could wager.

What's that? Are these, this is needed. Sorry. Yeah. It's, it's a big glass table held up by like two pillars. Yeah. Yeah. And they're not really, they're not really, I think they're like, they are heavy, but

I don't think that they're actually, I think they're like plastic. How'd you get this table? It was from the old, the house that I lived in before. Okay. And the, someone got it and then they left and it was there and I said, I got this table. So we've got a big piece of glass and I took it all with me. I mean, it is, it's too big, but my favorite part about it is that wager gets kind of like stuck over in that corner over there.

I don't have a lot of space. You don't have a lot of space. I like, I like kind of. I'm pinned up against, I'm pinned up against the wall and there's a giant mirror. There's like a, there's like a 10 foot mirror behind me. You constantly hit with your chair. I feel like I'm going to just shatter it. You're a hundred percent going to shatter it and, and then I will, I'll throttle you

to death with the shards. I will be very upset if you, you'll throttle me with the shards. I'll stab you with, I'll stab you with this. I'll stab you with the shards. Maybe I don't know what throttled me. Is throttle not work in that case? No, it just like, you would, the suggesting, yeah. Cause you would stab you.

You just don't want to say that I stabbed you. Yeah. Throttle is like strangulation. Let's get to it. Oh, okay. Okay. Throttle only. Throttle strangulation.

Yeah. What did you think it was? I always thought it was like beating someone with something. Full throttle. Yeah. Full throttle. Oh, it's strangulation. Well, full throttle.

I mean, that they can, I think that's the, that's referring to speed, acceleration. But like, okay, when Bart is misbehaves and then Homer grabs him by the neck and he has tongue is shooting out and he's like, why you little, that he's throttling. That's stabbing. That stabbing. Yeah. Uh, for the man who is not a computer me, I, I don't know a lot of normal human things like throttling, but you know, I like throttling.

I would like to, I would like to, I would like to throttle you at some point. Okay. All right. All right. So we also, Tony, I know you're also a fan of, of, or someone with some interest in Del Taco, which is a huge passion of mine. When did your interest in Del Taco begin? Um, I would say probably, excuse me, uh, when I moved to LA.

Okay. So we had, I don't think they were in NorCal, or we would go to Taco Tree where I don't know if that's a chain, but it was, uh, it was great. Right. I would love to climb. It's, I'm guessing it's not a tree. Uh, nope. You're wrong.

It is. Oh, it is a tree. Oh, whoa. Uh, one taco tree. Um, and so I really like it. I also live by a Del Taco. Okay. So I, I love Taco Bell and I think because I'm used to it, I grew up with it, um, but

Del Taco, I would say, I, those, those tortillas, those beans and those cheese, I think are, are, are better. If I'm going to get a burrito, I would go there, but almost anything else, I would go to Taco Bell, like potato taco, um, uh, cheesy rollup, uh, Crunchwrap Supreme was beans instead of me at jalapenos would be a usual for me. That sounds good. So wait, would, would you say Taco Bell you like more than Del Taco? If I had Sophie's choice, if I had to save one, what would it be?

Um, I'd probably have to, I'd probably, I'd probably go with Taco Bell, but I go to Del Taco more and yeah, I don't know. I also really like Mountain Dew. And so I am, yeah, that's a Taco Bell thing. Everybody loves Mountain Dew. I think only trashy people like it and I'm fully embracing that. Put me on the Mount Trashmore because I love Mountain Dew. Do you?

Of course. I like Mount, of course. It's good. Mount Dew is good. I'm going to say Mountain Dew. Mount Trashmore. Diet, diet, diet, Mount Dew is great too. Oh, okay.

If I'm going to do it, I go for it. Nick, who's on your Mount Trashmore? And so Mount Trashmore, are you suggesting like refuse or do you mean like trashy foods? Trashy foods. Okay. Mount Trash. People? Well, five pictures of you.

Wait, like trashy people I like or who people I think are the trashiest? Yeah, trashy people you like. Joe Dirt. Yeah, okay. Well, I mean, I haven't seen Joe Dirt, but Joe Dirt seems fine. I would throw, I mean, you got to throw an Oscar the Grouch, right? Who's a better trash man than Oscar? He's on my Mount Trashmore.

I'd say Steve Martin from that Simpsons episode where he's the sanitation commissioner. Okay, I agree with that. Let's see. What are some of the, oh, the, the garbage woman from Mulholland Drive? Hmm. These are great. And then what about the trashy from Fragile Rock or what? You know what?

How about your podcasting partner who worked on the back of a garbage truck one summer? Yeah. Mitch? Mitch is an art. Mitch, you're also on my Mount Trashmore. All right, great. I'm happy to be a part of it. You consider yourself a trashy person because of your association with garbage.

Yeah. Okay. There's garbage all over my apartment. I've lived with garbage for a long time. Dick, did you say that Del Taco has one of your passions? Yes. I do. I have a passion for Del Taco.

I love it. Okay, that's fair. It's delicious. Here's the thing about Del Taco. Yeah, go for it, please. Mine's gonna, have either one of you eaten something that you've thrown away in the trash and then later been like, huh, there's more of that or like, I was trying to. I've never actually fished something out of the trash to eat it, but you seem to be implying

that you have. Okay. Well, yeah. I wasn't implying that, but I'm not saying like, I'm saying like, okay, I have, but not on a regular basis and not like, like something where it's like, I'm done with this. There's still, it's still edible, right? It's not like I'm sifting through my garbage. It's not mixed up with coffee grinds.

Yeah. Right. Exactly. And I would go back. I feel like I've done that. I can't think of something specific, but I feel like I've done that. I will, I, I can't remember, I've never dug something out of the trash to eat it, but I will say that my first set of dishes I found in a dumpster.

What? Yeah. So like, I was in, I had moved into my first apartment the summer after call my first year of college when I lived in the dorm, moved into an apartment and then there were a bunch of just like, it looked like someone had just moved and taken a full set of dishware dishes and then just put them in the dumpster and they were just like sitting there like on top of a box. I was like, these are, these are usable.

So I took them out and ran them through the dishwasher and I have myself a set of plates that I use for like four years. Do they, when you ate meals off it, it tastes like garbage? No, you know what? Honestly, they, they were just perfectly usable plates. I mean, they were a little mismatched, but they were totally functional and they didn't have to go to IKEA and spend any money. You think they were haunted?

I bet they were. They're like the ghosts of food that had been eaten on it. Yeah. That's why they had to get rid of them. That's a terrifying scenario. There'd be so many ghosts on every plate. Mitch, have you ever eaten out of the trash? Mitch, have you ever eaten out of the trash?

Tony, you like me. I love you, Mitch. That doesn't mean you haven't eaten out of the trash. You know, I think I've like, like if I've, if I've taken something back out of the trash, it's like, I threw a bag away and there was like a burrito and I'm like, oh wait. And then like, if there's never been like a thing where I've been like thrown it away and like minute, like even like minutes at like maybe like, like within like a minute or two or something.

Yeah. Maybe five minutes. And like, and this happened like once, like I can't even think of a specific thing, but I, you know, I was on the back of a garbage truck, as you know, and the guy who I rode with would always go through the trash and like was like looking at stuff through in the trash. You know, if you took all the sharp things out of trash, trash would be fun. It's the needles in the glass.

Yeah. I wish I could get into a friggin lifestyle. I've pitched. Oh my God. Really? Here's the thing. I haven't done it, but I feel like in the bigger scope of things, it would be great. I've also pitched to my boyfriend and my friends, like, wouldn't it be great if people,

I couldn't be known as this person or maybe I don't it. But if when we went out, I didn't order anything, just because people waste so much and I feel like if, if there's one less meal there, then, then there's so much less, I don't know. Now, now I'm thinking I got you a drink earlier and you were like, I want that and you pointed at my macaroni salad and I thought you were joking. Now I think it's real. I had to warn you that it was a week old. My Mac salad.

I told you to throw it out and you said, no, I said, let's see what happens. That's true. And then you lit a candle. I'm putting the fridge. It's a pretty savvy plan, though, because I feel like, especially if you're in a place like the Cheesecake Factory, some place where they've got like these gigantic portions where a lot of people don't finish their entree, you absolutely could, could get by doing that. It's just that it makes it a little bit awkward timing wise because you got to wait to eat

till everyone else is finished or you're just picking at their places. Yeah, I do feel like because I am, I am fanatical about either finishing my food or taking it to go. Just like me and Ali, I almost never waste anything. We just eat everything. Give your leftovers to Tony. What are you doing? Because I'll take it to go and I'll eat it later.

You won't eat it later. I absolutely do. I am, I am fairly fanatical about not wasting food. I've also started, I've also started taking to go containers to the place. Yeah, you bring your own. Yeah. Bring your own. How much waste is like in people putting to go containers and then they wrap it up and

then there was like a plastic or a styrofoam thing. And then if everybody brought their own to go containers and a person who didn't eat until the end, Ali is great about that. Yeah, absolutely. Since, since, since we, we've been hanging out, have you been drinking hippie juice? What's happened to you? You've been smoking it. It's left over.

I'll drink it all day. Someone, yeah, someone accidentally left some hippie juice on the counter. I haven't done it yet. And I'm trying to work my friends into it of, of this might be me and it's going to be okay. I'm also a vegetarian. So that kind of limits me sometimes. What were you going to say about your passion of Del Taco?

Oh, what was I going to say? Oh, you know, I was going to say, here's the thing. I think that people bulldoze pass with Del Taco. Oh my fries. And it's always great to get a, get Mexican food and get some fries. You've talked about the fucking fries on here before. I know. But what I'm saying is that I feel like crinkle cut.

They're great crinkle cut fries. They're delicious crinkle cut fries. I repeat myself. And I'm just, I'm saying that I haven't brought that up in a while. And I think that's the thing that gets ignored. Cause if you're going, if you're going pound for pound, if you're going item by item versus Taco Bell, Taco Bell has nothing that compares with the fries. They don't have any.

I mean, apparently talk about Canada's fries, but Taco Bell in the U S doesn't have them. Here to think about it. You got it. You got a Del Taco. And then you can get, you can get like a burrito. But then also you can get a burger or fries. But I was in the Quincy. I'd get a raspberry lime Ricky.

And I voted for Bush in 2000, but I still, I'm still a leftist. Hold on a second. I knew that the Democrat was going to win Massachusetts. You sick fuck. So freeing you up to vote for the person you wanted to win. It was a statement. I should have voted green party. I was an 18 year old boy.

I think that that's a fair thing to say. The fair thing to do. I mean, I, I didn't, if it, if it meant that the, the presidential candidate would one, if it was, if there was no electoral would have been decisive, right? Yes. If there, if it was just a popular vote, I would not have voted for George W. Bush, but it was a very, a very unclear statement you were trying to make. I thought it was clear as day.

I knew what I was doing. Well, how was it not clear? I mean, I should, I should have voted green party, but my vote did not count. Literally. It was in Massachusetts and there was no way that the Democrat was going to lose. I just didn't, and now I do like that candidate. I regret not voting for him, even though it didn't matter that I did or did not. Yeah.

Right. Because we have an electoral college, Nick. So you wanted to make a statement by voting for the man who started the Iraq war. Look, I wanted to make a statement by not voting for the Democrat I want to vote for. Because, you know, sometimes that the candidate isn't who you want, Nick. Could have left the, like how you hate Hillary Clinton. I don't hate Hillary Clinton. Oh, really?

No, I don't. I don't hate Hillary Clinton. I am, I was disappointed with her campaign and I feel like that, that I think it's fair. If you're going to assess some blame for a loss in a close election, you can turn to her candidacy and her campaign and you can, you can certainly, you can certainly do, do an autopsy of that and say that some mistakes were made strategically. But I certainly don't hate Hillary Clinton. I would rather she be president right now than Donald Trump.

I voted for Hillary Clinton. I didn't vote for Donald Trump in a safe blue state to make a statement that I was displeased with her candidacy. Let me say this. I voted for Hillary Clinton as well. Who do you hate more? Hillary Clinton or fries? French fries.

I love fries. Who do you, who do you love more? Do I love more? I honestly like fries more than Hillary Clinton. That's easy for me to say. I would rather Hillary Clinton be president than Trump, but I'd like fries more. What about would you rather fries be president or Hillary? No, are we talking about like an order of fries become sentient?

Yes. Would have the brain power of a man? Yes. Of a man. Whoa. Yeah, a man. I'm talking an XY chromosome. Look at you.

Yeah, we'd have the brain power of a man and the thinking power of a round table pizza customer. So these would be some brainy fries. Yeah. In that case, I don't want the fries to be president. Whoa. Wow. What a surprise.

And you guys know how much he hates fries. So you must really. This is the thing. And this is a thing you try to. It looks like you shouldn't have fucking made given 18 year old met your heart. You try to harm me by saying that I don't like fries when I like fries. So it's like, this is like nothing. You're just contradicting something versus I'm underlying something about you that upsets

you. You're just saying that like, oh, I don't like fries. When I do like fries, that's just contradictory. It's just untruthful. I don't know. So it's like. The jury's out. I do like fries.

I enjoy fries. You have a fried tattoo. No, I don't have. I don't have any tattoos. Would you put fries in your top five favorite foods? Hmm. Would I put fries in my top five favorite foods? I'm not sure.

I don't think I would. Hmm. I'm not sure. I don't know what my top five favorite foods were, but I don't think I throw fries in there. But I also love fries. So I don't know. But are you. So are you saying that if someone doesn't like fries as much as you are, you do.

They hate fries. Yeah. Is that your test? I think you might just hate fries in general. No, I don't hate fries. I like fries. All right. Look, let's move on from this.

I was being honest when I told you about what I did when I was 18. Yeah. I'm being honest when I tell you that I like fries. What did you do when you were 18? You played fucking whatever the bassoon or whatever the hell you played. Let's see. I was 18. Well, I wasn't.

I was. I was only 17. It was 1986. I was born in the 60s. No, I was. No, I wasn't. Like, see, I was 17 in high school. So I gave up the bus.

I gave up all the musical instruments when I went to college. So, yeah, 18. I think I was playing what video game was out then. I was playing Xenogears. Oh, Xenogears. Yes. And Half-Life 1 and Grim Fandango. What was the last one?

Grim Fandango. Grim Fandango. The movie took it. Yeah. The movie took it's side. I was playing the flash game on that. No. Grim Fandango.

The classic adventure game. Tim Schaefer design. Oh, yes. Okay. Paul Schaefer? Yeah, Paul Schaefer. Paul Schaefer. Those Paul Schaefer video games of the 90s.

This Fandango's Grim. This Fandango's Grim. And it's happening to him. Woo. All right. So, I want to. Relax. We're on track.

No, I wanted to ask. I did want to ask you one more thing before we got into this week's chain, which is that you are an avid swimmer. I am someone who has recently, semi recently started swimming for fitness. And while we were waiting for Mitch to show up at the restaurant yesterday. Oh my God. We were talking, we were talking shop about. You know, I drove by the restaurant on time.

Uh-huh. No, you're talking. Like to like the joint. I know I drove by it on time and that I had to go get Jack. This is the truth. Jack's office is right over there. It was my fault. I mean, it was still my fault.

Uh, I was, I was on the outside. Oh, you mean you took a road to get. To get Jack. I drove by the restaurant at exactly 130, but he lives very, his office is very close. You just didn't budget the extra time to pick up your friend. Our friend. It was 135. It's fine.

It wasn't that big of a deal. But I was just saying here while we're waiting for Mitch to show up. I hate you so much. We were discussing. We were discussing swimming a little bit. So do you find to someone cause do you find it? It sounds like you're eating habits. You seem to enjoy some trashier foods.

Sure. It does your fitness help, uh, help guard your body against the consequences of those calories or what is, what is it about swimming in particular besides it being something that you've done for a while? Like why is this the thing you continue to do? Yeah. So I do. I also do love like vegetables.

Right. And a, uh, a salad every single day, smoothies in the morning. Like I love healthy food. Oh, okay. I also love trashy food or high caloric, however you want to think about it. But it's more a periodic indulgence for you. I would say so, but sometimes those periods are pretty long. Like I probably had Taco Bell three times this week.

Wow. It's a, but I would say three times this week. Yeah. Damn. I love that. But, but I would say in other weeks, it would just be very sort of clean eating. It just kind of goes, goes in phases, but absolutely swimming does help sort of like, um, uh, uh, keep a, keep away what could be.

Right. What, so what is your, It could get bad if you didn't, so how often, how often do you say you swim? Well, I haven't, I haven't swam in a little bit just because of a, a weird, I used to I used, so I did swim at this one recreational center. Are you kicked out of some pools? What's going on here? Well, do listen, my boy.

Uh, this actually might be you. Um, I did swim at this one place. I hadn't swam for like a little bit, maybe for a few weeks and they changed their schedule. So I went to look it up and on the pop up, it was like this swim place, somebody was arrested for filming, uh, and I have yet to call and be like, Hey, was I filmed or like, I don't know, I don't know how to figure that out. So I haven't been to this, I haven't been back to this place in a few months. You know how we can get to the bottom of this?

Nick, Nick, can we see your phone please? Well, you want to look at my phone to see if I've, I've been going to a pool to film women covertly. You were just saying that you love swimming. I love swimming. I like going in the water. I like going for a dip. If by water you mean locker's room, dip you mean filming.

I don't like what's being implied here. I was just about to say that I bought a Burbank newspaper and they had a police sketch of the, the assailant and it was going to, it was a photo of you. Oh my gosh. Wow. But you stepped on that with your accusation that I've been filming with my phone. You got to be quicker, my man. Well, I was trying to look something up.

But yeah, that's crazy. That's an insane. Yes. It is crazy. And I don't know. I mean, I think I, I mean. That's LA for you. Yeah.

I mean. That's LA for you. Yeah. Paparazzi. They'll get you. I never thought about it that way. Yeah. All right.

No, it's not bad. Next time you stop to drop a deuce in a Nordstrom. Someone's probably going to be filming you. That's LA, baby. Oh, he's got that Nordstrom. Oh, I was like, you could use Nordstrom to take shits. What's going on here? I mean, not with, with frequency, but Nordstroms have nice restrooms.

Drop in deuces and drop in deuce. Yeah. I'm going to cast 200. There you go. Yeah. I spent a lot of money on some Brutomali shoes. They have really nice restrooms. They do.

Yeah. Nordstroms have great restrooms. Here's what I would say. Nordstroms have great restrooms. Hotel lobbies are the best. If you go to a nice hotel and use those lobbies, those are the best public restrooms. But after that, I'd say Nordstroms are any sort of fancy specialty department store. This is so, this is the grossest.

No, this is good. This is good. After that, I would honestly put pretty, pretty high up there. I would put up like a casino. Yeah. Casino is pretty good. I think it's kind of in that hotel lobby category by throw casino up there. I would, I would honestly throw chain restaurants in that spell, like a sit down chain restaurants,

like not where we went, but like a, you know, like a sit down chain restaurant with table services have pretty clean restrooms. Then after that, I would put Starbucks. I think it's kind of in a category in and of itself because it's so accessible and they're so widespread. I think those bathrooms sometimes are terrible. Wait, aren't those bathrooms, aren't those single bathrooms? They're single bathrooms.

Yeah. No way. What are you talking about? You're going to use a bathroom that's a single person bathroom. A lot more butts. Is that what you're saying? No, I'm just saying that, that, that, that leads to lines outside the bathroom. That is no good.

Tiger. You need some privacy. I don't need, I don't want anyone around. It depends on the traffic at that, at that particular business, but there are some that are lower traffic and you have a little bit of privacy in there if you need to take some time. If you have advice on some nice bathrooms, hashtag toilet tips. Actually that, I will be checking out that hashtag because I always like to know where

public restrooms are. Yeah. If you find good ones, I mean, sometimes it's like a nuke. Oh, Gelsons. Yeah. Gelsons has a nice restrooms. I feel like the one she's talking about is multiple stalled bathrooms. That's, it depends.

I mean, if you can find a single one in some place that's lower traffic, then you know, you got some time that works out pretty well. But yeah, I think the, the multiple stalls are ideal because it's, there's less pressure on you individually. I'll give you one. Arclight. Arclight. The movie theater.

Yeah. Yeah. Arclight's pretty good. They got big, they like, they like, you're off in your own little room in the bathroom. Right. But honestly, movie. You got to buy a movie ticket. Yeah.

You got to buy a movie ticket. Yeah. You got to cheer yourself. Sir, you saw the good dinosaur twice yesterday. We recorded Doe Boys today. I might do an impression of myself, but you made it up. But yeah, movie theaters though, in general, I don't, I think are not good restrooms because they're very high traffic and I think there's a lot of, just, just if a movie's getting

out, you're just going to make sure a movie's not getting out. But here's what I was, here's what I was going to say. You got to look at the times. Even if a movie's not getting out, just so many people use those restrooms in such a hurry that like, especially in those men's stalls, you're dealing with some pee seats because guys are just going in there and just pissing everywhere. You know what I got to say? Yeah.

I take a bite out of people sometimes on this podcast. Here's what I got to say. I'm taking a bite out of people who, now, if you're not a child, if you're, if you create a pee seat, you are fucking pathetic as an adult man. That is a pathetic thing to do. And also here's another thing. Yeah. If you're carving stuff into the toilet seat, that's a fucking pathetic move.

I'm taking that. That's fucking, you should get your head dunked in the toilet, right, Weiger? I threatened to do this to you last episode, but if you, if you're carving into the toilet and you're peeing on the toilet, you should get your head dunked right in there. I think chronologically, it won't be the last. I think we recorded an episode that's going to come out later where there's, we discussed you dunking my head in my toilet at some episode at some point. Yes.

I want to dunk your head, I want to dunk your head in the toilet. Right. I would emphasize the point, but I'm thinking, I think you would fail in the futon. I would definitely not fail. I would definitely dunk your head in the toilet. I think I could, I could outlast you. You could not outlast me. I think I'm strong enough where I could outlast you and you'd get winded and you wouldn't

have the strength to dunk me in the toilet. I would definitely be able to dunk you in the toilet. So it's just you two in a, sorry if we, you already talked about this, it's just you two in a house and it's the objection is for you to dunk his head in the toilet and then go. The suggestion, the scenario we concocted that we agreed upon, I think his terms is that Mitch and I would be sitting next to each other on his couch in his apartment and then Mitch would turn to me and what were you, you would tell me or turn to you and I say, it's time for you to get dunked.

Yeah. So I would know, I would have a heads up that I was going to be dunked at that time. I would be sitting next to him. The door, your door would be locked. My door would be locked. Okay. So I wouldn't be able to get out of your apartment. So I'd have to be, try to evade you within your apartment and not get dunked.

This sounds like a fantasy you guys can have with. I'll just put a fucking Del Taco burrito in the bottom of the toilet. Just let you dunk your own fucking head. You think I'd want to, that's disgusting. I just go biofresh. I don't want to eat a fucking toilet burrito. Jesus Christ. I think if I put a, you know what, in a Ziploc bag with stones and sunk it to the bottom

of the toilet, I don't think you need the stones. I think it would sink. Maybe it would sink on its own. A Ziploc bag, it would be, it would be dry at the bottom of the toilet. I think you dunk your own head into the toilet anyways, just wanted to get the burrito. No, there's no way I would do that. I think you would. It's disgusting.

I think you would maybe dunk your own head. Let's try that. No, I'd be like that. I'd probably, if anything, they would probably give me an aversion to getting, to eating those burritos anymore, because I'd see it in the context of being the, the sunk to the bottom of a toilet. It would be a clean toilet. That's disgusting.

There would be a sign about the toilet. I said, freshly cleaned. That doesn't make me want it anymore. This plan is flawed. The guy who lived across the street from me, Carlos. I remember he was like, Carlos was, he's wild. That's what I'll say. This was in, this was in Quincy, Massachusetts, and he was like, if you flush like a toilet

twice, you can drink water out of it. And this is like when we were kids and flush it twice and he would drink water out of the toilet. Did he not have a sink? No, he was just like trying to prove to us that would be like clean enough to drink out of if you flushed it twice. Was this an adult man? No, he was, I mean, he was older than me, but he was, he was younger.

Why are you hanging out with this weird toilet kid? Because it was the neighborhood, man. I don't know. You hung out with the toilet kid. Did you ever try it? I don't know. I don't think I did ever try it because I think I remember being like, the toilet still looks like disgusting when they did it.

Right. I mean, you got to clean the bowl, but otherwise it's clean water. What was Carlos's last name? Sorry. Do you remember? I'm not going to say his last name. Well, I just looked up Carlos Quincy. It seems he's been given reward as the smartest man in Quincy history.

The town genius. Yes. Okay. The, the city that has John Adams, John Quincy Adams, the creator of the creator of the creator of Dunkin Donuts, the creator of Howard Johnson's, John Hancock himself, Nick, your heroes. Like you have to go back to the 18th century, Karen Cashman. Who's Karen Cashman?

She won bronze in the Olympics, Nick or what? I don't know. Some bullshit. I don't know. We'll take a break. We'll be right back with more Doughboys. Welcome back to Doughboys. We're here with Tony Charlene, hometown buffet.

So this is a place I went as a kid, Tony. And this was, for me, this was like my fat kid's treat. This was like, like, like Chubby Nick's going to get his, he had a good report card. He's going to get real full and dad's, you were calling yourself Chubby Nick yesterday too. Yeah. I was, I was a Chubby kid. Oh, okay.

All right. Good. That's what I thought it meant. You're a Chubby kid. You were talking, you were talking about this. Wait, you're, you mean Chubby in the sense that I had a boner? Like I had some sort of heart on. I wanted to brag about that's what I meant, baby.

Well, no, that's not what I was saying. Chubby. Chubby. That's, you're bragging about it. That's what people say. My dick is kind of hard. Get a load of my woody. All right.

No, but this was, this was a, this was a fat kid's treat for me. Tony, what was your connection to home down buffet? So as a Chubby kid as well, right? This was a Chubby poor kid, but phase were just a delight. The best, right? The best. We would always go to buffets. I, I think this is more when I was a kid, but probably still have these tendencies.

I would just eat myself sick. Right. I one time threw up at, in the middle of a buffet. Power move. A power move? I was claiming everything and I was fearless. Yeah. If I was going to say, if I saw that yesterday, I just be like, man, like I probably would

just like be like, whatever. A girl slipped in it. Oh my God. Wow. I know. Jesus Christ. I assumed you meant like in the bathroom. No.

So I, that's what I mean. It's, I would just, I also have like a touchy stomach and it's been like, my, my grandma does, my mom does, just a little health history of us and I do. I'm just confused, why did this girl walk through it? Here's the thing. I don't know. Well, I have no idea. I just was in the bathroom, like my mom was like, oh, it's okay.

And I was like rinsing my mouth and this like girl came in and it was like, along with her mom, she was like a younger girl and was like, somebody threw up and she slipped in it and was like so angry that there was like, I think they hadn't like blocked it off yet or something. Right. And then my mom. It was kind of like an oil slick. It was like a banana.

Yeah. It was like a banana peel on Mario Kart. It was more like, I think a red shell. I took a girl down. You hit the girl. Yeah. And my mom was like, and nobody, they didn't know it was me, but my mom was like, oh, it was her.

And like, I think she meant like, hey, don't make her feel bad. She didn't mean to. And this is the person you're like kind of talking about. And they were like, it was, what's your problem? Like, and got really upset. I was just like, yeah. And then like the whole thing, they were also kind of like sitting next to our table, but like it was like a family of like five and they're like, she did it.

She did it. And they were like hovering around our table, like, Jesus, like just kind of being kids, but also just like hovering around our table, I guess. And then it like at my dad at one point is like, hey, sorry, we're trying to eat like didn't mean to. And it was just like, I felt bad, but felt bad with a new plate of food. So it's I. So we would go there.

You did continue to eat. Oh, absolutely. Oh, my God. Sure. Yeah, this is like a nightmare scenario where you don't want any man, everything. I you know what? One thing has remained consistent with me. Barf Barf grosses me out.

Of course it does. It's not I'm not trying to brag here. No, I know. I'm not I'm not saying that you're like a big fan of Barf. Do you wait? You were gross. Are you you're more grossed out by Barf than other bodily fluids? I think Barf is the grossest.

You think Barf is because I think I'm more grossed out by like pus. I think that's the grossest. This is this discussion sucks. All right, we can get off this. So we get off this. All right. No, hold on. I want to I need to hear what I think. I think pus and I honestly think like like snot.

I find more disgusting than you are not as bad. Yeah, to me. But puke is up there. I think piss is like the least objectionable. Agreed. I might I might. Well, I spit relax. You like piss a little too much. I'm just saying, give me that piss.

Yeah, I got it. You guys are pissing. I mean, poo is bad. The shit is gross. I've got disgusted by shit. It is gross. Blood is pretty bad. They're all bad.

Blood is fine. Give me blood. Give me I'll get I'll take a I'll drink that. I'll I'll drink it. I'm saying I'm not afraid of blood. Blood is fine. OK, but the others are you a Dracula? I started to say, are you us in your Dracula?

If I was a Dracula, you don't think I would have bit you a long time ago, Nick, and made you have to follow me like whatever Dracula does. You want me to be immortal and like have to like hang around with you all the time. Yeah, but I would be in charge of you. Wouldn't you? This is not right.

You guys keep creating these fantasies. I think you'd kill me and like drink my blood for sustenance. I can buy that. But you making me into one of your acolytes. I don't see that. Isn't it usually seduction that you get kind of like bit on the neck? Isn't it a very moving on?

OK, I'm not a Dracula one. No matter what people think. Well, I don't go out in the daylight much. OK, not. I do love blood. Proving it. I can transform to a bat and fly around all these mirrors and yet no reflection.

You know, it's like a like to me a gross bodily fluid. This kind of a weird one. Oh, what? Eye juice. Oh, interesting. Like if you're kind of like, you know, like loser. Eye juice or like crusty when it's like crusty. Yeah, it's like I crusts are worse than I juice.

But if it's sometime because it's kind of oozy, you know what I mean? Like it's kind of like tears. I don't mean tears. No, I don't mean. I don't mean tears blue as pink eye. No, yeah, like it's someone who's if you've got an eye infection. I guess it's kind of in the pus family. But I think of eye juices specifically grows the pus.

Oh, that was family. I could watch that's being popped all day. Oh, God, I can never throw up immediately. Here's my here's my theory. Now, I don't want to break things down between genders. OK. But I think girls are OK with seeing that's get popped because my sister used to love popping, but she'd like to pop my pimples.

OK. And because because she was like, I don't know. I think it was like cathartic for her. But then I feel like every so many women that I know have been like more easy, like a like I feel like well, I feel like with zits when you have zits, guys always are like gross. You know what I mean? Like it is like having this discussion.

I'm going to barf. Yeah, this is saying zits from talking. We're mentally picturing this. It's so fucking meant to be picturing me as like 16 years old. Yeah, it's fucking nasty. Well, think about that shit. You know, you know, I don't I think like, see, you can watch as it be. Oh, absolutely.

So I have two examples. You and my sister's now going to be in trouble. I remember I never go on a podcast again for breaking it down. You're fine. You didn't break anything down. You just said something. I broke down. I'm done.

So anyways, that that is my sort of love buffets. It was something I was unsure of going to. But it was like, oh, I hadn't been back in a long time. Every time I visit my parents, though, we'll go to a buffet. But it was, I think, more advanced, more to the golden corral. Oh, yeah, you guys just went to. But anyways, we did go around recently with with Stony Sharp. And I would just say my overall set, because I had a good

fond memories of the hometown buffet. But I don't think I've been in 15 years, probably more than that. Yeah. And I like returning to it and having been to Golden Corral recently, it's it's just such an inferior version of the buffet. And Golden Corral, I feel like is doing it right. And hometown buffet just feels like a sadder execution. Jack, Jack Allison came along with us for the for lunch.

And we pulled up and we commented on how Jack said specifically, I said, wow, it looks like look at hometown buffet just like the actual restaurant itself, the exterior. And Jack said that it looks like a cardboard building. And it does. It really does. It's like a brown, like sunsoaked California brown building that is like that just looks like a nothing. Yeah, nothing from the outside.

And the interior looks like like a Marriott lobby from like 1987. It looks so dated. It feels like a hospital, like cafeteria. It really does. Yeah, it really does. I will say this, when we walked in, the hostess was very, very, very, very personal, super, super friendly, very helpful. I sorry, I had called on the phone because I was like,

oh, that's right. When do they change their menus? Like what's going on? I was going to spend a day at this buffet, which we thought was insane. Well, I take this very serious and I also didn't do it. But I called and the girl I might have been the same girl, but she was so nice and she's like, I was like, what changes in the menu? And she's like, you know what? I got a minute. Let me look it up.

And she like shuffled around some papers, like listed everything off. And I was like, even when I was like, oh, OK, all right. She's like, what else? Let's see. What else? Anything else you want? Like was very like very into to be helpful. You mean the transition from lunch to the lunch menu to the dinner menu? Yes, because the breakfast menu is only Saturday and Sunday, which they changed that, I guess, four years ago.

She was full of information. Wow. And that changes that for 30. But most of the changes are more of a meat sort of change. Yeah, like add a carvery and stuff. Right. Yeah. The fact, though, I think the fact that she was shuffling around papers kind of sums up hometown buffet. Like it's I'm like, oh, I'm not surprised that they have papers. Right. That they're shuffling through.

Well, you walk in, it looks plain. And I'm not sure if it's just this hometown buffet or if it's all of them. To me, it tapped into a very like, oh, yeah, this feels right. This feels right. It was what I remember. It was what I remembered to the point where I was like, oh, this hasn't been updated. This is just like kind of frozen in time.

And I think I think I don't remember the exact price point, but I do know that we spent less money there on dinner for four adults. Then I did when I went with me and Natalie and Stoney and and his wife, we went and that it was certainly a good amount cheaper at hometown buffet. So if you just was in terms of, yeah, because I know, but I was also like, it's kind of expensive. It is kind of expensive. I mean, it was like, it was what was it?

Fifty seven dollars or something. Well, we also got drinks for four. Yeah, we got drinks. Each of us got drinks, including are you including tip? Oh, yes, I did include tip. So it was, I guess, forty six dollars. Yeah. So if you're not tipping 20 percent, which sometimes people at buffets tip a little less,

you can you can certainly feed your family for a little bit less than you would spend at the Golden Crow. So I guess that's the one thing in its favor. But I just feel like the little let's get into the food a little bit because I think the quality of the food was the big negative for me. And that that's always the case anytime there's a buffet, like it's kind of like, you know, the the trade off is going to be

you're going to get more food, but you're going to get less lower quality. But I hear I just like was disappointed with a lot of this. I started off my first plate. I got a salad with mescaline greens, cucumbers, cheese, carrots, garbanzo beans, bacon bits and sesame seeds. And then I also got myself a cup of broccoli cheddar soup. I threw a little blue cheese dressing on that salad and I got myself some nondescript bread.

It didn't have like a little it had some salt on it and a little bit of butter. But I couldn't it was just a non identifiable thing of of crusty bread that it has my first plate. What did you guys start off with? So I did a lot of like small plates. So the first one, garbanzo beans, peas, cucumbers, mashed potatoes. And that was like the the first sort of plate. Should I walk through all my plates?

Why don't we break them one at a time? OK, great. My first plate. So we've walked in here, it looked plain. Like everything looked plain. There's a lot of veteran stuff, which is nice. A lot of older people like decor. But yeah, veteran decor, a lot of older people, but not all old people.

No, there were there were quite a few young people. I would say diverse. I would say for me, it felt like it was it was it was young families. And then it was seniors. Like that's that's what it felt like to me. It felt like families, young young people with young kids and then seniors. And then like those were kind of the two like people just trying to to feed their family on a budget and then older people who are maybe,

you know, maybe they have fewer taste buds now or they're just trying to eat on a budget. I mean, that's the thing that happens. Like you're you're you're you're you're just kind of dead in overtime. You're yeah, you're you're your taste buds are all gone. Yeah. So I was so I got my play. I looked at the food. I was like, hey, this looks pretty good.

I was excited. I put a few french fries on my plate. I had a couple of french fries. I said, these french fries are good. Yeah, this is good. Yeah, I am in for some fun here. I got a little piece of meatloaf. I got some mashed potatoes.

I got some mac and cheese and I got a little sausage. Like what that? Like what was that? Like a bar like a grilled barbecue? Yeah, it was a smoked sausage. It was the description. It had some peppers in there. I was excited.

Yeah. And then we all went back to our table. I got a Diet Coke and we ate. And I got to say right off the bat, that mac and cheese looks good and it's so disappointing. It is like the most it's like the watery, watered down mac and cheese. I'm a classic mac and cheese gal. Like it did look good, I guess.

Right. But I too was disappointed. But I wasn't surprised I was disappointed. It was it was it was I was like because I was like, OK, at least they'll do this. All right, the mashed potatoes were OK, probably on the better side. I really like them on the probably on the better side of a lot of the food there. The fries were good. And then the the the smoked sausage.

Yeah, was actually my favorite thing of the entire time I was there. Yeah. So I was like, but the mac and cheese was a let down and the meat loaf also was not good. Yeah. And I was like, man, there's some stuff in here that I just thought was pretty easy. Like I kind of went with like a plate of stuff that I thought was kind of like the easier stuff to nail. And and but I was like, maybe some of this other stuff will be better.

And so we went for round two. Yeah, well, just to talk through my first plate real quick, and I got some of the same things you got, Mitch and Tony and later rounds. But so my my salad was actually one of the highlights. I thought it was like the greens were pretty good. A nice looking salad. Yeah, they were they were, you know, it felt like it was they were bad greens. But you know what? It was it was everything was fresh enough.

They had a bunch of an array of different ingredients. I put myself put together a nice little substantial salad there. The broccoli cheddar soup to me was lukewarm. Like it just was like I was hoping for. I mean, it's sitting in there in there in that. That big old what that whatever they call that soup. Yeah, that big, that big old soup that. And you would think it would like the the the you know,

the thing is it's going to thin it is or it's going to thick and just sort of sitting there in the heat so it will change texture over time. But I would think that the asset of just being under constant heat is there would actually be pipe and hot when you get it into that little that little what do you call those soup nooks? What do you call those little soup cradles? A bowl. No, but it's not a bowl. It's not a straight bowl.

It's got a little handle. What do you call it? Handle ones, a crock, a bowl handle, a crock, a crock. Once you get in one of them soup crocks, it sounds like a crock of shit to me. That's the name. It's a soup. It's a bowl with a handle. You call it a crock. I got a crock. The thing is I wear on my feet, Nick. Yeah, well, crocks, put some fucking bowls with handles on your feet.

It was it looked cold. I was cold. It was lukewarm. That was my criticism. That's what that's what I let off with. You would think the asset would it would be it would be pipe on hot. And it wasn't hot. It was it was lukewarm and that kind of it tasted OK. But it was real disappointment.

And the bread was just bread. I went back for seconds. You went back for a second. I think you liked the soup. But did you find it warm or did you find it hot? It was warm. It wasn't hot. It was warm, which which was which was fine. I also, again, I think there was a lot of dishes

that I didn't or couldn't really partake in. Right. There was also like which looked good. That because you're a vegetarian jumping around. Yes, it was the pepperoni pizza. And I was like, oh, when I asked a guy and I was like, hey, could I put in a request for like cheese or is like the next one cheese? And he's like, no, we only do pepperoni. But tell you what you could do is pick it up.

I was like, thanks. And he's like, boom, cheese pizza. It was being very genuine. And I was like, oh, did he think that he was the first person to come up with this idea? And I think he I truly he was truly being, I think, very sweet and very like, hey, like, huh? Think like that's just didn't understand the situation.

Yeah, I do that. So with something like the broccoli cheddar soup, though, like, are you confident that that isn't made with like a chicken stock? And until until you just said that, I hadn't thought about it. Oh, shit, I'm sorry. No, I mean, that's I should have maybe because, yeah, I guess I don't know how broccoli cheese is made. Well, I think that you should just eat now.

I think it's over. Speaking of that pizza. Yeah, yes. My plate number two, they started off with a slice of pepperoni pizza, a chili dog, which the chili dogs were there was buns wrapped in plastic in a big like vat and then there were hot dogs next to that, like, or like slimy kind of. And then there was this chili next to it.

And this is the point in the meal where I questioned why Tony wanted to come to this. Sure. And so I unwrapped this hot dog bun. Jack was there to Jack. What's Sonic style? He got a chili cheese dog in honor of Sonic the Hedgehog. An honor of Sonic the Hedgehog. And I unwrapped there.

There were a couple of buns that Jack unwrapped that were hard as hell and were not usable. I put the hot dog in, which is kind of slimy. I put the chili on top. And next to it, there was another mac and cheese. I've been let down by this first mac and cheese. So I took a spoonful of this mac and cheese. So this was my third plate.

Slice of pizza, the chili, the chili dog and not chili cheese, the chili dog in this little lump of mac and cheese. Nick, I had these. So I'll just do plates two and three in a row because I get the smoke sausage on my second plate. I agree with you, Mitch. A meal highlight. One of my one of my favorite.

Second plate two or no. Isn't that what you what what plate were you doing? This is my second. But you said should we do thirds to to get them out of the way? Just second and then third. You know, it's chaos of this point. Yeah, I thought you said it's just chaos at this point. All right, here's my third.

I'm already to my second plate. Let me finish my second plate. Then we'll go to your third plate. All right, then we're fine. Relax. It's not chaos. I got the smoke sausage. And I thought that was one of the better items I had.

Mac and cheese. Should I go into my second plate? Look, we can all say whatever plates we want at any time. All right, chaos. Tony, it's chaos. I say we should all just make it out of the same time. And you know what? What?

In Sonic, yes. Chaos is good. We collect the chaos emeralds. Yes. If you want all the chaos emeralds, you can get the true ending. Yeah, it's a regular Sonic. Mitch, have you been playing Sonic Mania at all?

I have. It's hard. You know what? It's like it's that old 16 bit difficulty that you kind of have like some time past that 16 bit difficulty, man. But it is what life. Life has that 16 bit difficulty. Am I right?

Sage words social. But but it's a Sonic Mania is great. Man, it's a really fun. It's a really well well done baggage. I'm on the flying battery ship, which I talked to Jack about. I was like, man, it's hard. This level is hard. And he said that Sonic Mania is weird because like the fifth level

might not be as hard as like the third level. Yeah, the same sort of observation that the difficulty progression is not linear, because it's kind of a greatest hits package where they have some new levels and then they have other ones from just like this level is from Sonic and Knuckles levels from Sonic CD levels from Sonic one. And they're just kind of ordered arbitrarily. So it doesn't progress like like this. You're not doing this to the typical stair step of progression

in terms of difficulty as as the game is progressing. Some levels just be easier. Anyway, Tony left the dust cloud where she was. But yeah, so I got the the mac and cheese, the fries with cheese sauce. So I added some cheese sauce from the taco bar on those fries. The mac and cheese, I agree, a little disappointing. I mean, it was fine. But like we recently did KFC and our last episode, we did KFC on that podcast.

I'll take that KFC mac and cheese any day over over this, the home down buffet mac and cheese, the fries. Yeah, I mean, they were one of the best things there. I was signed because I was kind of like, you know what? It's it's kind of isn't that a little bit of an indictment of the place that their best thing is like fries with cheese sauce? That's one of that's like maybe the bite I enjoyed the most. I had some green beans, which were soggy.

And, you know, it felt like I was just it felt like a chore eating them. Some fried chicken that was decent. And then I got myself a banana cream pie, which was OK. It felt like it had been sitting there for some time, but it had that good banana cream flavor. You, by the way, you threw this into chaos. I just said my second plate. And now you've said I thought you went into your third plate.

No, you just said your second plate. Yes, I thought you said I'm going to you said second. And then you finished it off with saying third. You started to say third. And I said, I will go on to my third. Check the tape. Truly. But I was like, I thought you were saying I would go on to my third like you were going to go on because I was like, this is chaos.

Yeah, I was confused as to what was going on. You're the chaos creator computer. You're Eggman. You think I'm Eggman? Yes. Well, look at you. Look in the mirror, Mitch. You're you're the one getting cast as a I don't look like a fucking egg.

Mr. Humpty Dumpty. I look like beef. I look like a slab of beef. Wait a minute. You think you're you're like a hunky Dr. Robotnik. I don't think I'm a hunky Dr. Robotnik. I think Dr. Robotnik looks just fine. Thank you.

I think I look like a different man from Dr. So you think there's no physical resemblance to me and Dr. Robotnik? No, I don't have a big orange mustache. I mean, I think it's I'm not bald. You're closer to you're closer to Robotnik than I am, I feel like. Yeah. And I'm Sonic. Shut the fuck up.

I wasn't saying I was Sonic like you because you're autistic. You love the game Sonic the Hedgehog. I feel like it'd be more like a Miles Tails prowler. The dick is autistic. So if what if that were the case? He is. I'm not saying it's a bad thing. Are you? No, it's not a bad thing.

Tony, Tony, don't don't don't turn on me, Tony. By the way, I have this reputation as a Sonic guy. I'm a Mario guy. I like Sonic. I like Sonic. No one thinks about this. I like I like Sonic. I like the guy like the games.

No, people people think I don't know this is Sonic. I'm a Mario. I'm making this clear. I'm making this clear. Look, I like this. I like Sonic's fan community. I like the the passion from the fan art creators and the fanfic writers. I like the the Sonic universe because it's so weird.

I think the Sonic games, though, are overall pretty inconsistent. And there's some of the Sonic games that I haven't played or as I played every Mario mainline game, and I finished almost all of them. And I certainly have a lot more knowledge and passion for the Mario universe versus the Sonic the Hedgehog universe, but I still like Sonic the Hedgehog. Tell me he's not autistic after that entire spiel. You might be, but it doesn't mean we. He's not a bad thing, of course.

This might sound silly, but can't you be a fan of both? I am a fan of both. I am a fan of both. But I think a lot of times people because I think this all goes back to Sega does what then 10 don't. I think that was a point where they kind of find a divining line was was established between the Sega fans, the Nintendo fans. Sega does what Nintendo or was a Genesis does what Nintendo?

Whatever the slogan was. Yeah, Sega. Yeah, what Nintendo don't. I mean, that that was the punchline. I thought it was Sega. Yeah, that is that is the other one. And then I want Sega. Yeah, this is a West Side story.

You don't have to choose the Mario's or the fucking or the Sonic. I agree, Mitch. You don't have to choose. And you and you're not. No one no one sees you walk by and says this is he that guy's a Sonic guy. I just say I was was saying I want to just make my make this element of my personality clear that I like Mario more than Sonic, but I like both. Got it.

He fries loves. Second. Should I go into my second play? Yes. But wait, did you not do your second play yet? No. Oh, please. They go to your second. OK, so I got the same thing of peas, cucumbers, red beans and chickpeas along with potatoes, mashed potatoes.

I went back for those mashed potatoes. I really like them. I tried the mac and cheese. We already talked about that. Should I go into my third plate? Yeah, go for it. I got some of the tortilla chips with their nacho cheese. I got some more of those mashed potatoes, more of those vegetables.

I just listed and corn. Oh, and a hot, I guess the cooked chili pepper. And some cooked chili pepper. I didn't even see that. Yeah, it was where the nachos and that sort of like taco bar area. Oh, wow. And some Spanish rice. And then should I go in my last plate?

Yeah, any highlights on those plates? I would say so the Spanish rice had some promise, but it was just left under the heat lamp for like so it was like crunchy. That's a big issue. Even the cheese sauce felt watered down. Like that night I had to help taco with that cheese. Hell, yeah. And did and it was just so much better.

Right. And then the cooked pepper was really good, but it was really hot and I was embarrassed because I was like crying and my nose was running and like really was spicy. It was so spicy, but I didn't notice. I love spicy. Well, you guys were gone. Jack was actually kind of talking to me and I was like,

he was like Tony, OK. So I only ate part of it because I had to pull it together. And then so no real highlights. Still, those potatoes were good for me. Right. The next play, I got the soup, some other bread that was not the one that you're talking about. This was more sort of like a toasted, I would say baguette with with butter on it. I saw that. More like a pasta.

Yeah, you're what you would have on the side. And then I got three desserts. I got the cheesecake. I got the banana pudding. The peach cobbler and actually, I got one more. I thought those are the ones I remember on the next one. Love the soup. Yeah.

A cheesecake was all right. A peach cobbler under that heat lamp too much. Yeah. Long. Oh, I also had some some broccoli, which I know you said was mushy, but I felt like was not too bad. It was fine. Yeah, it was better than the green beans. Yeah. On my third plate, because I got the pizza broccoli. I was pretty full by this point, but I forced myself to eat a third plate.

I got pizza, broccoli. I mean, I'm the chump that they I've mentioned this before, but I'm the chump that like the guy who goes to the casino and then just blows all his money in the slot machines and makes the casino profitable versus the shark who's, you know, who's got the blackjack tables memorized and he's, he's, you know, wrecking it up over there. I'm the I'm the chump who makes buffets profitable because I get full very quickly.

But I forced myself to eat a third plate. I had the pizza, broccoli, meatloaf, which I was a childhood favorite of mine. I also always remember making a dartin towards that meatloaf when I get that home-to-home buffet and I got myself a piece of cheesecake. I agree that the cheesecake was functional. It felt like grocery store cheesecake.

It felt like I just got something out of the cold case at Ralph's. And I took it home as just like, oh, this is cheesecake. The pizza was fine. I mean, like a lot of like a lot of the pizzas that felt like they'd been frozen and heated up in a conventional oven. It just like has that kind of doughy character to it. It also felt like it had been sitting there for a while. Broccoli, we discussed.

I should have thrown some cheese sauce in that broccoli. That would have brought it to life. And yeah, the meatloaf I was definitely disappointed in versus the version that I remembered. I don't know. It was very, very ketchupy, like very ketchup heavy, like a marinara sauce. Me tasted bad, honestly, was my issue with it. Do you think because it was like not really crowded, it was kind of sparse that at night you get a lot more fresher items?

It could be the same heat lamp sort of trouble that was through all of these like things that at least I had. Yeah, we were there at 140, which is there was people there. But it was a late side of lunch service. There are probably some you're probably right. There are probably some lingering half full steam trays that were just sort of sitting out for a while. Yeah, that was probably probably an issue.

Should I get my plates done with? Finish them off from the second plate. I didn't review my second plate, Nick. I got pizza and I thought the pizza was fine. I think it's better than 7-Eleven pizza, but it's not great. I think that's fair. I think it wasn't. It wasn't great. You kept saying it was a sugary, right?

It was it was a little bit sugary, but that was it was more that the chili dog was like sweet tasting. OK, and then I got that second mac and cheese, which had beef minutes. So unfortunately, you couldn't try it, but it was not good. Also, a let down. Then my third plate, I had a piece of fried chicken, popcorn, shrimp. I had a couple more fries because I did an orange chicken with a white rice.

The orange chicken was legit just bad. So in this in the yeah, the soggy did not taste good. Was like like Panda Express is nearby and Panda Express, orange chicken is like a billion times, like so many times better. And the and the fried chicken was like it like wasn't the worst of anything, but it just wasn't that great. The popcorn shrimp, the popcorn shrimp was OK.

But it was like also kind of like whatever. Yeah. And so, yeah, every everything was kind of at that point now. I was just like it got to the point within the meal where I was just like, I don't look like eating this stuff anymore. I start I'm starting to think all this is gross. And then I also got dessert and I got myself bread pudding, which was like like the texture was like it was better than what I'm about to say.

But it was the other dessert I got. But it was like like the texture was just like kind of like filmy or like it was like it was just it was it was not good. Yikes. And then the brownie like a lava cake. It was like a brownie Sunday, which was terrible. And you tried it and I tried it. And it was like it just was weird. I've never in my life there's never been like a big contrast

from like something that looked so good. Oh, yeah. So bad. I know. It was it was insane how bad it was. It was it was truly, truly bad. It was really disobeyed. Like I had a bite of that as well, just to. And yeah, your eyes like my I felt like my eyes were deceiving me because it looked delicious and decadent.

And it was just like pretty flavorless. It was it was trash. And then finally, and this is I did soft serve. But here's the thing about this place is that even the soft sort was serve was weird. Like it's like, you know, when soft serve comes out, it's like this was like huge. It was like a huge big log, Nick. It was huge like the the like it was to the the flu was to open. The flu was to it was gigantic.

And I did a vanilla and chocolate swirl and it was just huge. But that was like, OK. Yeah, I had two little sort of drops, two or two little like, I don't know, pull down the lever. But you're right. It just everything felt like tilted. Everything everything seemed to everything seemed weird. The Diet Coke was normal.

I wrote down root beer fizzy. I had some very solid unsweetened iced tea. And then also they had a slushy basically an icy machine. Yeah. And I got a little I tasted a little bit of cherry icy. That tasted normal, too. That was a nice touch that you get that in the drink service area. This is back when I thought the the place was cool. I was like, cool, an icy machine.

And then like at the end, I was like, I might as well just have some ice. It truly was like exciting to because I was like, I feel like I'm going to be disappointed. And I was like, so excited to be on the door. But I was like, I think this is going to be a disappointing place. But I want to go here and to see your face. You were so excited. You were like, hey, like we think like we were going to go here to maybe like kind of like, you know, satiate and be like, oh, yeah, this place is definitely bad.

But you were so excited. And we thought maybe it could be good. Truly to see the excitement and then how quickly it just went downhill. By the way, why was Jack there? We were working late of that day. And so I took him to lunch. OK, gotcha. He was a great company. Yeah, I like having Jack there.

I was just like, you texted me beforehand is like, hey, can I bring Jack? And then you were like, like, I'm trying to convince him to like you were like, how to try to convince him to go with you. Oh, no, but I didn't have to convince him to go with me. I because I said, I said, can we get Jack lunch? Yeah, because that was the only way I could get him to come to hometown buffet. I guess I could have told him to eat on his own. But why? But what I'm saying is like, why did you want him to come with you?

Because I was going over there to work with him afterwards. OK, but I'm saying like it didn't like that fundamentally didn't matter. No, and he had talked about trying it because the office that he and I are working at is right near. Yeah, it's right by it. So we had now it's out of the way. We never have to ever go back to home. I see what's going on. We never maybe never ever will.

Tony, well, give it a little peek into my review. Well, on that note, let's get to our final thoughts. Tony, you've heard the podcast, you know, this works. We'll each go around. We'll say our closing argument on this chain based on our lifetime experience, eating there and then give it a rating on the order of one to five forks. We will begin with you. Oh, OK.

So just dipping back, I feel like maybe because I'm older, like as a young kid, it felt like it was like a sprawling thing of food. And because I was a rotund little girl and I guess had eating problems. Yes, I was a chubby kid. Really? And once you're a chubby kid, you're always a chubby kid in your life. Well, your motherfuckers grew out of this stuff. What the hell? So I feel like it was like, oh, there are so many like amazing things.

And I've been a vegetarian my whole life or excuse me, like pescatarian. So it was like I had the same options. So and now vegetarian and now lean towards vegan. So so like, you know, dietary sort of habits, but obviously broke the veganist for for this. And so it was they had good music. I will say that it was very hip music. Right. The the this, you know, there's not it's not much to look at.

My mom's a nurse. I go to the the hospital. It does remind me very much of a my mom was a nurse, too. She's now retired. Yeah, she's at mine, too. Yeah, very noble profession. Oh, absolutely. The best. So it reminds me of a hospital sort of. I think there was better food at the hospital that my mom would work at. It's everything just felt watered down.

It just felt like I don't know what it was. It was also like a little upsetting that it was like you can't fix a cheese pizza. I mean, there's not a lot of people here. I don't know. Maybe that's one of the oven. Yeah, maybe that's me being a little picky. Maybe they're already sort of made. I don't know. Or you would think there would be in LA. There would be enough vegetarians where you think like, oh, we'll put half

pepperoni, half cheese out. We'll do we'll do some sort of something. But I chose it. They had what I did have. Yeah, what I did have was like a nice a salad bar. I did like the mashed potatoes. I did go back for seconds of the soup. But I just feel like I'm going to have to.

I also felt awful afterwards for like a long time. Like I just felt and I'm not one to be like, I know what it's like to eat bad food and feel awful afterwards. It wasn't like I didn't know what I was getting myself into. But this felt so specific in a way. I'm going to have to say and this might change because I'm dying to hear what you guys think. Two forks.

Wow, two forks. That's I think that's I think that's I think that's OK. Yeah, I go ahead, Mitch. Or do you want me to go or you want to go? I'll go. OK. I would compare this place to like. Camp food. But that's an insult to Camp Burgess, where I went to camp.

Well, Mama, I compare it to food at a nursing home. Virgins. OK, I mean, I should have gone to Camp Virgins my entire life, but I went to Camp Burgess. Virgins. I'm still a member of Camp Virgin. I will compare it to nursing home food. Oh, that's a great. But that's an insult to even time where my grandmother stayed. Wow.

I compared to hospital food, like you were saying. But that's an insult to Mass General. That took care of my father, where the food was good. All these places had literally better food than like than this place. Did the everything besides the salad, which I didn't. I didn't get a salad, Nick. The salad did look like you concocted a decent salad.

Yeah, I was pretty happy with the salad I saw. But outside of the soda and the sausage, the smoked sausage and the icy machine and two drinks. So two drinks, a smoked sausage. And I tried almost everything else. And the soft serve ice cream, which was still strange. Everything else I tried was bad. It was bad, not good.

And I like Buffett. There's just like not a there's not a lot going on. I think maybe if I went there a different time, I would I would like, you know, if I went there at a different time, it would be a different story. But if Sonic, the hedgehog, went in there and he made himself up one of those chili cheese dogs, he'd be spinning. He'd be doing the spin move right off the door. Wow. Yeah. Wow.

So that being said, was it as bad as caros? And I gave caros the worst rating ever, which was a half a fork, maybe. No, it was not as bad as caros. Caros was terrible, but it was bad. So I'm going to give it one fork. That's it. Wow. OK, OK. Sorry, you don't have to apologize. I know they need to apologize.

They need to apologize. Figure it out. Like like Tony, I, too, viewed Hometown Buffet still through the prism of youth as this Willy Wonka like fantasy land that had every delight that could entice a chubby youth to fill himself up until he was content and his father would rush him home and tuck him in. Well, that's why I could not sleep. Why did he have to rush you home to tuck you in the dream of a meal

that I had eaten once more? But as far as this visit, I'd call it camp food, but that would be an insult to Camp Arrow Bear, the music camp I went to as a kid. You can't steal my review. I'd call it nursing home food. But that would be an insult to the nursing home that I just grandma was at. Then I was just I was going to say the nursing home

that Polly Walnut splits his mom in and the sopranos. Polly Walnut. I'd call it hospital food, but that would be an insult to the fictional Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital from the TV show Grey's Anatomy on ABC. I thought you were going to go nurse Jackie. Oh, yeah. It was a Browno's theme. Right.

Idiot. Oh, yeah, I should I should have done with the the Edie Falco series. Boy, dumb idiot. I fuck that up. But anyway, if Sonic 8 here, yeah, he'd say got it. He'd say got to go fast to another buffet. I just didn't have a great experience here. It was it was a letdown. I mean, I was expecting a letdown, so it wasn't like I was crushed.

But but, you know, this wasn't I'd viewed it as a kid. And as a kid, I liked it. And as a kid, it filled me up. And, you know, even through my teen years, it was like a lot of calories that I could get. And I think there's a place for these kind of restaurants, obviously, if you're trying to feed a family on a budget or if you're a senior and and that, you know, you don't care.

Or maybe we're somebody who's just not very picky and you don't care too much what things taste like, but you just want a lot of food for not too much money. But as far as me assessing this meal, I mean, I gave Burger King one fork. So and you know, I don't mean is better than this place. Yeah, Burger King is better than this place or equivalent to this place. I think I'd rather eat at Burger King than Burger King is much better than home but town buffet. I don't know if I'd say much better. I don't think Burger King is that good.

It is. But I but you know, if I'm giving Burger King one fork, I consider one fork my floor. I'm giving hometown buffet one fork. Sorry, hometown buffet. I feel like, yeah, God, I was I feel like I was trying to be generous. No, it's fine. It's totally OK. I think it's OK. Two is still still a negative score. Yeah, you don't have to apologize for your two. No, I feel like no, I feel like it's too much.

No, it's OK. No, too much. It's it's it's an average of four divided by three is one and one third fork. So yeah, whatever. What are you surprised that it could do this fucking math? I have a couple questions. Yes, please. Is there a certain way you attack a buffet? Because you said you wanted to treat it like you would a normal meal.

Well, I see went salad. Yeah. And then first I did a standard progression. But although I did throw a dessert in there early, a lot of times I'll go dessert first because I it's crazy. I want to start with a sweet treat, and then I can kind of balance that out with, you know, with something that's a little bit more savory, because if I have that sugar bomb sometimes late, I just like I sort of react in a weird way.

I start most meals with a salad at a buffet. I might eat a salad second or later on. I'll close out with a salad sometimes at a buffet, a big salad. Nick, you said that you were trying to see it through the eyes of a child. You kind of are like Michael Jackson-esque in that way. You try to see things through the prism of being a child. Oh, boy. I'm just asking you. Tony, I love you.

Tony, I was going to say, it's funny that you said that your stomach hurt. Jack and I, that was the only compliment we had about the places that our stomach didn't hurt. Whoa. But also like I was like, everything I ate, I ate not a lot of. And then I like the most I ate of was honestly the ice cream. So I don't know. I don't know. I don't know if that factor into it. I mean, I feel like I pushed the boundaries, but in a in a fine way.

It just felt so weird. I don't know. Yeah, but it did. It did like hurt and didn't feel good. I also at the end had like three, you know, three different desserts. Didn't finish them all, but yeah. But but also I'm like not surprised by it by it hurting. I mean, like was it gross? I don't know if it was like it was just low quality.

When you remember we were at Caro's, like the thing they brought out to me was like disgusting. Like it was like it was like like that shouldn't be on a plate. Like right and saying, but yeah, it wasn't. It wasn't. Yeah, it wasn't. It wasn't. It wasn't quite like that. I'd rather go back to Caro's. Oof, I would not know because I know I could get like

I get eggs and bacon bacon. That's a good point. OK, I also have another question. Sorry that I wanted to write in with this. But now that I got you guys here, what what do you? Oh, no, what in a in a server at a restaurant? Yes. What is your sort of what are things you like and things you don't like? Because I feel like you guys kind of differ on this.

And I'm curious what makes a good server to each one of you. Nick, Nick, Nick likes likes bits. Yeah, I like a funny one that has like planned out jokes or ones that you could tell. Yeah, they are recycling this material. They're doing some material. OK, great. I have fun with that. What about when they kneel down?

That's a little awkward for me or or if someone like sits down in the booth next to you. Yeah, it's a weird move. I like the average server experience where they're nice and friendly and they're helpful. Because sometimes I ask for like, do you like this or should I get this or that? I ask questions like that, which drives some people crazy.

I think it's totally reasonable. I think Jack maybe doesn't like that. But there are a few people who didn't like that. But I but I will be like, do you like this or that? I'll ask them questions. So I just like someone who knows their stuff. I like honesty. Yeah, I agree with you.

I like honesty and decisiveness, especially because a lot of times it'll be like, you know, some servers will be like, oh, this is our most popular. But to me, that's less helpful than like, what do you personally like as someone who has tasted this entire menu and all likelihood and someone who has worked here for some time, what are your personal favorites?

I find that is more helpful as a guiding. And then I like when they're like, I just like sometimes it can be weird talking to someone. But if we're vibing, hey, we can talk. But you don't like the jokes or too friendly. Sometimes if it gets into too long of a conversation, I'm like, oh, I'm here to talk to my friend or something. But is that too mean?

I feel like that might sound come off as that happened. That's what I was going to ask our servers dying to talk to you. I'm a friendly guy. I talk to people, Nick. I feel like they're trying to get out of that conversation. Yeah, I would love to see it because I'm pretty sure. Damn it. You can't say anything on this podcast anymore.

A big headed guy won't shut up. Big headed guy? Oh, wow. That regular doctor, I forget. Don't call him autistic. That big head Dave Matthews lap band piece of shit. Asshole. All right, that's it for the fucking hometown buffet.

Those are a view of hometown buffet courtesy of our guest. It's time for a culinary tour of a Nordic Island. Nordic Island nation. This is a new segment called Iceland is your land. Oh, my. Iceland is your land. Iceland is my land from rake to Vic to Huff, Narf, Jor, Oh, we're from the North Atlantic

to that big volcano from 2010. Iceland was made for chewing treats. All right, Tony. So you went on a trip to Iceland. I did. You brought us some some various snacks. Fuck you. You can't just transition.

What was the smooth transition for people online to say? Nick Weigar is genius. No one says that. They do. No one's like Weigar is genius. Oh, God bless you, Tony. Oh, Tony. That was it.

It was like one guy in the reddit. You got so mad. No, no one like what people wouldn't like agree with. Iceland is your land. What's your song? Go ahead. I don't have a fucking song. But you went to Iceland.

Yes, you brought us. It's it's labeled Viking a mix. What is this exactly that you brought for us? This was in the airport. OK. When we were I went with Betsy Cedaro. And Nick would have got that wrong, too. It was just that's not true.

We've had Betsy on the podcast twice. I've said her name right. So I got I said Cedaro accidentally for God's sake. I love that. Cedaro is right. You said it right there. Oh, I did. Yeah.

Oh, you accidentally said it right. Is what you just disclosed. Betsy Cedaro. There you go. What do I say, Cedaro? You said Cedaro earlier. I say shit wrong all the time. I got a marble mouth.

Oh, I know. Damn it. If you say something wrong, it's OK for someone to correct you. Yeah, that's all right. Fuck you, Nick. Fuck you. Fuck you. You're so riled up.

You guys, honestly, should just fucking get it over with. So this was in the airport. Not going to lie. And I was looking for the US airport. Yeah. Yeah. And I just bought it because it's a whole hodgepodge of things. Right.

It seems like these are these are legit. But they're all from Iceland. Mm-hmm. So let's dig in. OK. Oh, you got some scissors. Hey, those scissors that have been sitting on the table come in handy.

So what? Wait, so when you were not. You asshole. I do not cut my pubes with those scissors, Tony. You're leaving your pubes scissors out here. Also, why are you using fucking giant kitchen shears to trim your pubes? I think we all know why.

I got huge pubes. Yeah. You want to say? Mitch, Mitch, Mitch, Mitch. And you random pubes. So what was the food like in Iceland in general? OK, so we did. Sorry if you want to.

Yeah, feel free to start distributing some of these. OK, great. We'll just pass these around. So it was. We were only there for a day. Like, wow, where does this kind of like not to plug them does this like layover where you can have like, because our destination was Germany,

but you can have an extended layover. So we were there for 18 hours to give full credit to Betsy. She reserved a dinner at this one place. I can't describe the food other than it was just so good. I don't remember what I had. It was like some sort of like, I think it was like a tofu steak, which I know sounds like bullshit, but it was so it truly was good.

And I'm trying to think of like Icelandic things that like stuck out. But being there for the minimal amount of time, I had this yogurt that I think people go crazy for. They're kind of known for it. I can't I feel bad. I can't really speak to like the food too much. I want to go to Iceland. But don't they have putrified shark?

Isn't that a big thing in Iceland? Sounds disgusting. It's it's it's it's one of their big things. So what I got in front of me, I got California. You right? Roussiner was just California raisins, basically chocolate covered raisins. I have a couple of those right now.

I just had a bite of the cooler. K U L U R. There's an accent over the first you. And these were very akin to a milk dud. In fact, I would just say like if you gave these to me blind, I would just assume they were milk duds. OK, but it was totally fine. These are these are basically raisin.

That's what I just have the California raisin ones. I'm having a bite of the Huron now, H-R-A-U-N. These are these all just have the same name as Ikea furniture. And but this this kind of has the texture. It looks like it's kind of got a wafer, a stack of wafers with some sort of rice sort of crispness to the outside and it's covered with with milk chocolate. I'm going to take a bite of this milk dud for the cooler.

What do you think it was? I think it's close. I think it is close to milk dud. You're right. Yeah, it just tastes different from it. But the California raisins taste like raisin. That's 100 percent. Yeah, it's a little different than a milk dud.

It's not that's not like one to one, but it's it's in the milk dud family. This was quite good. The Huron, I actually like that quite a bit. It's it's yeah, the wafer like texture is actually works really nice with the rice crunchiness. I'm surprised I haven't seen that combination before too much. Kind of akin to a Nestle's Crunch Bar,

but just like a little bit more texture and depth to it. I got these Apollo Lackrish. Oh, this seems like licorice Apollo Lackrish Lackrish. And it's like, but it's it's string. These are the weirdest looking ones of the bunch so far. Um, you might say different. Oh, they're they're weird. The Huron was good.

Very delicious, really good. What I'm having right now is the Appel Sinu Rosma Suku Ladi. Oh, boy. These are the most Icelandic things I've had so far. Yeah, this one is like it's like that. You can see there's an orange on the box and it's just sort of an orange orangey chocolate,

but it's really, really tasty. It's quite good. I had the orange one, too. It's very creamy. Yeah, great creaminess, good point. Are these the ones that you guys think are like, um... Weird. The cooler, yeah.

The ones I thought was like a milk dud. Oh, milk dud. I was thinking of Whoppers. You're right. Yeah, absolutely right. So good. Very creamy. Yeah, pretty good.

All right, so I've got the bingo. Anyone have the bingo yet? Mm-mm. It's spelled just like B-I-N-G-O. I'm stressing the O. I don't know. It's got an accent over the O. Ha ha ha.

Well, I know we see it. Yeah. Well, it's not a bingo, it's a bingo. One more time. I know. I say Betsy's last name wrong. So wait, so this looks like a different version of the cooler, actually.

It actually has lacquerous cooler underneath it. I wonder if this is just a darker chocolate version of it. I'm going to have a bite of this one now. I agree with you guys that the Huron is the best. Huron is a wonder. Yeah, that licorice one. I actually have like a coconut licorice-y, black licorice. That is fine.

I think, is this the same one I just had? That one I didn't like. That one's like, it's kind of chocolatey, but kind of licorice-y. It's weird. I guess they're really no licorice. I guess they are. The bingo. I have the Florida bar right now.

The Florida bar? Why is there so much like American shit with like Icelandic? There's like that California one in the Florida bar. I think they come from a... Yeah, I spit that one out. Are you going to spit it out? The bingo? Bingo.

Yeah, bingo. Bingo. Bingo, get out of my mouth. Then go away from my mouth. Exactly. The Florida bar is the winner up there with the Huron. It's great. Woo.

Fuck, I don't want to eat this licorice shit. The Apolo Lacris. This is okay. It's lacris, not licorice. It's weird. I don't like it. Yeah. I mean, it's not as bad as the bingo, but it's pretty bad.

I don't think the bingo is that bad. You like the bingo? Oh my god. Oh, it's a strong, oh wow. The aftertaste is fucking terrible. Is it chocolate-covered licorice? It's chocolate and licorice. It's fucked up.

Because you're like, oh. And then you're in too deep that you can't. This is like the deep licorice taste. Wow. You know what, it's like if you went to the devil and you wished for chocolate, they'll be like, I'll give you chocolate. I'll give you some chocolate delights.

And then you eat them and like, oh, wait, this has licorice in it. And he's like, ha, ha, ha, ha. He's fulfilled your wish ironically. But then also you're like, hell's not too bad. Don't just give you chocolate. And wishes. All right, I'm going to have the Florida bar.

The Florida bar was good too. I would say the Florida bar. Why are you trying that one? Oh, fuck. I spilled the Florida bar. You spilled the bar. I dropped the bar on my laptop. The coconut's everywhere.

My keys are covered with nougat. This is a disaster. What the fuck is wrong with you? I thought the other end was open. I thought the, I thought. There was a 50-50 shot and you guessed wrong. I picked up the wrong end and it just dumped out the bar onto my laptop.

It's a mess. Thank you, Yousong. Yousong brought some paper towels over. He was up too. He was right on it. He was ready for these sorts of events. This is very hard. All right, I'm trying to take up a small part.

I've got my track pad. It's just covered with chocolate. So is Mitch's. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. I'm going to try the Florida right now. You know what? I guess it's just one big candy bar. Florida played a big part in that 2000 election.

I think it's just fucking karma getting coming back to you, my man. For giving me a hard time about voting for George W. Bush. Oh man, that's on you. No, it was a statement as a Democrat, as a lifelong Democrat. I was registered Democrat. Okay.

Can I say this about the 2000 election? Please. What's up? I didn't vote. Whoa, mama. I discussed this previously, but yeah, I didn't vote in the 2000 election. I was very disengaged with politics at the time.

And I was, you know what? I wasn't allowed to vote. Even worse. This was me at the time. Doesn't matter who the president is. The two, what? Two old white men? Doesn't even matter.

What? Yeah. You were, do you, did you think you were cool? I did that. I didn't think I was cool. And I was wrong. The term on a skateboard going down a hill. Right.

Backwards with some election. It's weird to picture you during this election thinking you're cool when you're like what, you were 30 years old. I was 19. Yeah, I was 20. All right. So what's the winner here?

I think it's easy. Oh, is there a winner? Okay. My vote was for Huron, but then the Florida bar was so funny falling all over your laptop like that. That it wins? That I think it might win out because of what it did.

Yeah. Well then I would agree. If we're taking how we. I see. I mean, the orange one was a little too orange-y for me, the orange chocolate bar. What? Try to pronounce that, Mitch.

The apple sinew, rojama, skew, and fuck that. Skew. It's a hard one. I think I'm with you guys. I was, I was all Huron. I had nothing was topping the Huron. The bingo was awful, but. Bingo is a loser.

But when I got to the, what was the loser? Bingo, bingo. Okay, thank you. Bingo is, huh, fuck you. But and the Florida bar, you know, much like Florida in the 2000 election, it betrayed me a little bit by dirtying my laptop. Yeah.

But. Cause you're jacking. I still, I still can. I still can appreciate it. That's why I didn't get out to the polls. I was at my own poll. I think I was jacking off. You come the.

The polls are almost closed. Well, that means I'm going to come. The polls close. The polls are closing. Oh, I'm not registered. In chat. We can't get hard. Hang in chat.

Yeah, I think the Florida is the, is the clear winner. I think it's the best one, but the Huron is pretty good. The Huron, maybe I would say is better, but I like the, I like the Florida. I think I like the Huron tastes better. Yeah. Huron and Florida for me too. Both are really good.

Bullshit. Raisinettes are raisinettes. The raisinettes were good. The cool, cooler, good, but those are, you know. Both, both, both, both licorice candies were bad. I don't like black licorice that much. So if you like black licorice, you might like it. I don't like the orange chocolate one too much either.

I like that one. Yeah, I did too. Very creamy. All right. Thank you so much for bringing those, Tony. Just like a restaurant value feedback. Let's open up the feedback. Today's email comes from Chris Karase.

Chris writes, I hadn't eaten at a jack in the box until I moved to San Francisco about eight years ago. My roommate and I lived near a franchise that was open 24 hours in the Richmond district, which she lovingly called Jack in the Crack. As a Pennsylvania boy with no prior jack in the box experience, I thought this was a horrible nickname until I came to realize after a quick Google search,

a lot of people refer to it as Jack in the Crack. Were there any nicknames for fast food chains that you used in your younger days? Any you still use, I still say Mickey D's rather than McDonald's as another example. I do remember Jack in the Crack. That was a thing that people would say. I don't, I never really liked Jack in the Crack

because I feel like it's not like a play on box because Jack in the box doesn't rhyme. It feels like you need to change box to something that sounds like box. I always thought it was Jack in the Crack because it's like addicted, like they wanna eat it. Oh, I thought it was like a crack in a butt. Yeah, that's what I assumed, I assumed it was like.

Oh really? I thought it was Jack in the Crack because it was, because I heard that too, I've heard a. No, I thought it was a little booty finger. Yeah, a little booty finger. Oh, Jesus. Yeah, I definitely thought it was a little booty finger. Booty was sonic, don't stop it.

No, that's all I think about, a little booty finger. I don't think about booty fingers at all. Yeah, you do, you think about it now. Well, now, yes. Yeah, so I guess it's just Jack in the box so I call it booty finger. I'm trying to think, I feel like my, I feel like my dad had like a nickname for McDonald's

of like. I have a, I mean, I have a couple, I remember, I know. One was that I've heard, I've heard taco smell a lot. Yeah, taco smell, that is one that came to mind. I don't agree with it. It was the one he listened to Mickey D's is. Yeah, Mickey D's is a very common one. I've also, this is one that I've just heard from,

it might be Denny Jelenick who just does this, but I've heard people refer to McDonald's as Donald's. Oh, weird, I don't do that. Which is where they dropped the mic, just Donald's. I don't think so. You don't think, maybe it's not a common thing, but I've heard that, I've heard that from a few people. I don't know, maybe it's a Midwest thing.

Grubway. Ooh, Grubway. Oh, Subway is Grubway, that's pretty good. I used to, I also lived in a small town so I think Subway was like, ooh, Grubway. Get some grub. Get some grub. Oh, that's a good thing.

Yeah, like grub. I was thinking like grubs, like the. Oh, okay, interesting. It's like a Roy shack. I'm not on the same page of anyone today. Like Domino's Pizza Hut, do we ever call it the hut? Oh yeah. Yeah, I've heard it called the hut.

They tried to, I think they were gonna rebrand as the hut at one point. No, keep it pizza hut. Keep it pizza hut, you gotta have pizza in there. Hooters call fat tatties. Fat tatties? Do you say fat tatties? Just a.

Not really. I don't wanna go to fat, I don't wanna go to fat tatties. I think they should rebrand. I'm trying to, I can't think of any other like, like Domino's or something. Right. Well, I'm sure there are lots of regional variations out there.

I'm sure there are lots of people who have their own creations they've come up within their towns. I feel like so much of it is like family stuff. Right. Your family is Wally and Irma now and they don't talk back to me. I think they talk all the time.

Oh yeah, Irma is very, very, yeah. You saw Irma is very, very talkative. You take her out and see me out as a lot. But doesn't that feel like such a family thing of like, when you're with like your family, your cousins, when you get like doma, stinky doms or something, I don't know. We would call, and maybe this is representative

of our family, hometown buffet or anything, hungry heifer. So, I guess that says a lot. Your family is strange. Hey, yep. Yeah, I can't think of a specific one. Hey, you know what, out there. Oh, you know my big one.

Yeah. When I was younger, I called chocolate milk, Bubba juice, chop chip with milk. Yeah, I know. That's not a chain. Bubba juice, chop chip. And that's also insane. Excuse me?

Bubba juice, chop chip with milk. You don't think that's not anything. Bubba juice, chop chip with milk. Yeah, you broke down the etymology from it before. Yeah, you don't have to say slurred. Bubba juice, my bottle. Right. Chop chip, chocolate, milk, milk.

I wanted the chocolate with the milk. Sure. I mentioned this before, and it was weird that you were being bottle-fed chocolate milk. I wasn't getting bottle-fed chocolate. My mother didn't mix her breast milk with chocolate. I don't know if she didn't do that, or do you remember? I don't know, maybe she did.

Yeah. But I did not get bottle, I was a boy. Right. I had like a sippy cup, Wyger. You can't be trusted. Yes, I couldn't be trusted. They kept the top on the sippy cup until I was 18. Sure, yeah.

And then the day I went off to college, they unscrewed the top, and I went off to college with my Bubba juice. Yeah, do you have any names like that? Like a thing of like a nickname for food? Like, you know what I mean? Like, do you have like a, like when you're around the house? I mean like Zah or something?

Yeah, Zah or, no, nothing like that. Not really. I mean, not a fucking weirdo. To have a nickname for food? Nuts and bolts. Yeah, what the fuck? You don't have, you know what I'm talking about. Like, Eggs Benny or something.

We call the Eggs Benny. We all understand. Yeah, we understand the concept. I'm trying to just fucking see if you, trying to keep the discussion going because there was nothing for the restaurants. We had plenty for the restaurant. You just couldn't, you couldn't even think of any yourself

so you felt excluded. So you tried to change it to something else by referencing weird personal history. As I walk out of this podcast right now. Do it, I dare you. I guess BJ's my house. Dare you to walk out of your own house. Fuck you.

If you have a question or comment with the world of chain, oh, you know what, out there, if you have any fast food or chain restaurant nicknames you'd like to use, hashtag restaurant nicknames. Ooh, that's a good one. Thank you, Tony. Fuck you. Hashtag restaurant nicknames, let us know.

Oh, so, you know what? If you have a nickname for food, hashtag, hashtag. Bubba juice, Chah chip. Bubba juice, hashtag, Bubba juice, Chah chip. Chah chip. If you have nicknames for food. And if you have a question or comment about the world of chain, restaurants, you can email us

at dobuyspodcast.gmail.com to get the dobuys double our weekly bonus episodes. Subscribe at patreon.com slash dobuys Tony Charlene. Thank you so much for being here. Truly a pleasure. Thank you guys. Blessing us with so much of your time. Bringing us some delicious delights.

Great snacks. More than we're gonna try in overtime. You gave us a surplus of goods that we can taste test on this podcast. I'll probably eat them without wagger. Well, I'm very excited. Jim, anything you would like to plug at this time? Nope.

Fair enough. No, no for this episode. What about a Twitter handle? A Twitter handle? I don't tweet. Sometimes I'm on Instagram. My boyfriend and I have a podcast called Settle This Forest that will be released.

One year in the making, everybody's still not released. So look for it in five months. Maybe? What's the hold up? Just Settle This Forest. Ray. Tony, we'd love to have you. When you come back next time, take my side over

a wagger's mold, please. You're stroking a pepperoni stick. It is. You have a slim gym. You have a slim gym. You're like petting like a cat. It's very strange what you're doing right now. I'm just, oh god.

You just wanted something to fiddle with. My pleasure. Yeah. Thank you for being here. Also, you can just release a podcast. It's what we do. We just record it and put it out there. And it's bad.

I don't know. And people yell at you. I do. That'll be it for this episode of No Boys. Until next time, I'm Mike Mitchell. I'm Nick Weigar. Happy eating. See ya.