Doughboys - In-N-Out Burger with Armen Weitzman

Episode Date: August 27, 2015

Actor, comedian, and LA native Armen Weitzman (Another Period, Burning Love) sits in with Nick and Mitch to discuss beloved west coast institution In-N-Out Burger -- and to reveal what he'd eat for his Last Meal.Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

As with so many fast food chains, our story begins in Southern California in the aftermath of World War II. The year was 1948, and husband and wife team Harry and Esther Snyder opened a burger restaurant featuring the first-ever drive-through with a two-way radio. This innovation became the industry standard, but though others imitated, none could inspire the loyalty the Snyders did with their commitment to burgers, fries, and shakes made with fresh ingredients at fair prices. Over the subsequent decades, the businesses remained in the family and has bucked the trend

of other fast food restaurants in a number of ways, by refusing to franchise instead owning and operating all of its own locations, by keeping its menu small and focused with just four food items plus drinks, and the famously stingy, labor-unfriendly fast food sector by choosing to pay its employees above minimum wage and provide them with benefits. It's kept its prices low and fed its cult-like following with a secret menu, and the left coast doesn't even seem to mind the subtle Christianism hidden in its packaging. Now with over 300 locations across five western states, today we ask, does it really live up to the hype?

As promised in its jingle, is it signature double-double really what a hamburger's all about? This week on Doughboys, in and out burger. Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Nick Weiger, alongside my co-host, Mike Mitchell, the Spoon Man. Spoon Man, yeah. It seems like some people don't love the Spoon Man, and we'll get into that in a minute. What do you mean?

What do you mean some people don't love the Spoon Man? Oh, maybe our guest today just shook his head and discussed what he said, Spoon Man. That kind of annoys me. Well, we'll get to our guest in a second. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't let it throw you. Yeah. No.

What's up, Spoon Nation? You woke up, I feel like, seconds before you got here. I did. I haven't been drinking. I drank last night, and with the birthday boys. Because of your diet, you haven't been drinking with any regularity. That's correct, yeah. And the birthday boys did a revival of this, our first sketch show last night at UCB.

I saw it. It was quite entertaining. And you did a great job, too. Actually, Lil' Wags the Burger Boy almost died last night. I saw him backstage gasping for breath. He was on the ground. It was very, it was a dramatic moment, right? Yeah, well, our friends, Neil Campbell and Paul Rust, have the show Neil and Paul Growing

Up is Tough, which they did close to a decade before, and then for the Upright Citizens Brigade Los Angeles's Theater's 10th year anniversary, they've been doing, bringing back these old shows. So last week, last night, we did a double bill, Neil and Paul's show, and the birthday boys show. And I do like extra parts of Neil and Paul's show, and like the third guy in the show. And one of those involves me wearing a wolf mask and a suit, and then chasing them around the stage.

But the wolf mask I was provided with last night didn't have a mouth hole in it. So I couldn't breathe. And then I was like running and doing all this like physical action, but I couldn't get any air into the mask. So I felt like I was about to asphyxiate to the point where I was like really gasping for air. Yeah, you were on the ground gasping. And who stood above you like a Christ-like figure and held his hand down to you?

I admit, honestly, you were backstage and you saw me in my time of need. You offered me a tiny little water, and you helped me up, and you made sure I was okay. And that was very, very civil of you. And I appreciate that. Kind of belittling by calling it a tiny little water. It was one of those mini waters. I don't think that makes the act any smaller. Thank you.

Yeah. I care for you. I knew that if you died, it would be complicated for this podcast, so I didn't want that to happen. And it's kind of the thing of we kind of, oh, I feel like the origins of the Doe Boys podcast to our shared history in the Upright Citizens Brigade sketch comedy community. That's very true. And that was the kind of thing.

And these were these told sketch shows, which is how we originally met. And years later, now we're doing this dumb thing. Very true. So we haven't done well for ourselves. No. But you did a great job on the show. It was a fun time. I went out and I had some drinks afterwards, and then I stayed up late.

Maybe with our guest today, we went to a diner, Fred62, and got home about four or so. So I was very tired today, and I was sitting on the couch, and I just, I fell asleep. And I woke up about 10 minutes before the show started. And then I ran out the door, and of course, you know, traffic in LA is great. So it took me 40 minutes to get here. It was terrible. Well, the important thing is that you're here, and we're... I'm here.

I feel bad. I'm embarrassed. I had to admit that. I'm sorry to all of Spoon Nation. I don't think you're letting anyone... This doesn't make the podcast come out any later. Inconvenience the two of us and dusted our producer, but... I don't really know how it works.

I could have. You mentioned our guest. Let's introduce him. He's one of the stars. He's shaking his head, no. I've never... Are you not ready? You want a couple minutes?

You're ready to go? Okay. I'm getting a thumbs up now. One of the stars of Comedy Central is another period, which was recently renewed for a second season. Congrats to him. He's a retired friend, Armin Weitzman in studio. Hi, Armin.

Hello, my friends. Happy to be here. Oh, glad. Happy to have some fun. We're happy to have you. And you know, speaking of origins of the Doughboys podcast, the two of you, Armin and Mitch, you guys had a podcast pilot on this very network years ago. Am I correct about that?

That's true. Well, let me just say, Armin is probably my best friend. I mean, he's not probably. Armin is my best friend in Los Angeles. Wow, that's what I get. You laugh. Oh, you're crazy. Pretending to cry.

No, I wasn't pretending. Armin is probably my best buddy in Los Angeles. Again, not probably, but we both like basketball, but you know, Lakers and Celtics. You can tell by how much you kissed Los Angeles ass in the opening to this thing that you love. Los Angeles Armin is the same way he was born and raised here. And I love the Celtics. He loves the Lakers.

And we had a little podcast about basketball. Wow. Well, those are a lot of nice things in regards to that failed pilot. I have a lot of emotions about that. Best we don't discuss now on this happy occasion. Why not? Here's a place to do it. There was two, one likes the Celtics, the other likes the Lakers.

I think that's a fine premise. No, that is just, as a friendship, it's already hard enough. Sure. Well, you know, Mitch and I are dealing with the same, because you know, Armin, you and I have bonded over our shared affection for the Los Angeles Lakers basketball franchise. We've seen each other at Staples Center for a number of games. You know. Why do people hate the Celtics?

Why are people okay with the Lakers? I don't get it. I feel like the general general. Well, let's have a rivalry. It's a historic rivalry. No, but maybe just because I live out here now. Let's have a start over here, because everybody hates the Lakers, just if I may say. I think so.

I don't know if you've seen Game of Thrones, but they're sort of like the Lannisters in that way. That's for all the... Oh, my gosh. Like I think people are very mean to the Lakers and all they've done is provide everything and to find basketball as its definition. I'd agree that kind of like if we're looking at the pro sports franchises, and we'll get the food in a second, folks, but if we're looking at pro sports franchises, kind of the Lakers,

and I feel like if you're going to major league baseball like the Yankees, and if you're going to football, Mitch, your New England Patriots are kind of like the successful franchises or historically successful franchises as the Lakers aren't currently particularly successful. In recent memory, they won a championship in the past five years, so I mean... No, this is the darkest time we've ever... Yeah, it's been a rough, recent patch, but I mean, they're teams that are very successful in a historical sense, but also like the rest of America kind of unites against them, and these are the bad guys.

So I don't know, I think that's a thing you can relate to as a Pat's fan. Yes, I can. Yeah. Yes. I mean, I feel like, yeah, the Patriots are pretty now universally hated, and for no good reason, and Tom Brady didn't cheat, he didn't deflate the footballs. I honestly truly think the NFL is so fucked up on that. See, this is what our show is, our show, I know, our show, I can't get into it because

I'm going to get too mad actually, it's too messed up. Our show is called Super Basketball Brothers, we're going to talk about basketball and stuff like that, and probably get into other sports, but I can't even talk about the Patriots because it gets me too angry. Why do you think the podcast just didn't take, or why do you think you guys weren't able to? Oh, I have a few ideas of why it didn't happen, I think I have a few ideas for why it didn't happen.

Listen, man. Let's hear some of your ideas on that, because this is like in Magnolia, I came in here, I thought this was going to be a puff piece, and you guys are like drilling me about this thing that is. Armin is an artist. It's going to get more complicated. Yeah. You're not just going to pull a Magnolia and wait us out, are you?

No. Okay, you won't give us a silent treatment. But I will give as good a performance. In this podcast, as Tom Cruise did in Magnolia, I think Armin is one of the funniest guys I know. He's an artist. And I don't know if we could ever, he's always busy, and his hair is wild, and I don't know if we could ever settle down on those dates to go out and do it.

You know, I think it was a while time. We also recorded the pilot, Dustin may know this for sure, you can probably give me a head nod. I think we recorded that first episode when the basketball season was ending. Yes, yeah. It was four timing. It was four timing. It was before Dwight Howard had even been traded to the Lakers.

Oh, okay. Okay. At the end of the Dwight Mirror era in Orlando. It was something I used to search into Google. That's how long ago. Wow. By the way. But, well, I don't want to call anybody out.

Do it. Go ahead. But, you know, I want it, I can't, I just, I want Mitch, yeah, you know what? We have different levels of, I can't even remotely, are we talking about french fries or what boys? Because I can't, I feel like, we'll come back to that. What? If this was the dynamic of Super Basketball Brothers, I think that society was robbed

of something pretty special. Well, no, I just, I want to make sure, you know, I felt like the time Mitch didn't want to talk about basketball as much as he wanted to talk about other things. Well, that's the thing. Armin told me that before the episode. He was like, he was like, we're going to talk about basketball. I was like, yeah, we'll get into other things. The thing actually you and I have talked about, Nick, with Doughboys.

Yeah. We've all discussed this sort of things. How long will the, like, when will the audience bore of the actual subject matter? But then in the recording of the pilot of the episode, it seemed like, I felt like I was talking about basketball and then Armin, hmm, I guess Armin talked about fingering a lot. So this is it, huh? This is not Doughboys.

I, you know, you got, I think this was like a low stakes, having fun. I have a lot of opinions. I was going to do this thing where I'm like, hey, you know, I feel like Mitch, if you could list a bunch of players on the Celtics currently, I would know whether you were a real fan or not. But I didn't want to do that kind of thing because then I would put them on the spot. Oh, you mean just put them on the spot? On this podcast or in the past?

Just right now or always. Oh, in the past, I could always. That's all. But right now, for example. Sure. But I wouldn't, because also, this can't be, is this cut out or is this cut out? In the past, I'll, I'll, I'll tour, if I, if I, no, this isn't getting cut out, this is going on the air.

Are you saying right now, is it getting cut out? Hey, what's up? It's Armin. You're going to send it to Doughboys on 98.3. So far, I would characterize this episode of Doughboys as a debacle. I think it's really gone off the rails. I'm the guest. I'm the guest.

You are. Yeah, you are the guest. We're happy to have you. I'm sorry for, for, for, for bringing up this old subject of this podcast. I think it was. Obviously a little bit of a sour subject. I didn't realize it was such tricky. You know, I think we should get the, I think we should get the pilot for Super Basketball

Brothers online. Dustin, thumbs up from Dustin. It's good. I probably can't name too many current, actually I can't, I could, Kelly, who do I have to name? Kelly Olanik, Marcus Smart, who else do I have to name? I know all of them. Well, also there's been some roster turnover in the South Seas.

I know, I know, I know them for the most part. You know, I was a bad basketball fan this year. I felt bad about it. They also were bad. Wow. This is a great day. It's not easy. Oh, shuck.

Armin, the two of us have stuck by the Lakers franchise through these trying past couple of seasons I know, and I know that you're a true fan, so. But also Mitch is a true fan, I feel like whatever happens now, this is gonna, I love you guys. I went to a game this season. You guys are both, have been a part of my life. I met you guys at the UCB Theater, and all right. Let's talk about food.

So Armin, you were born and raised in Los Angeles. Hell yeah. So what about, let's say, we asked this question to Farley Elliott, who's a food critic when he was on the podcast earlier. If someone was to travel to, a tourist was to come to LA, as a lifelong Angelino, where would you recommend they eat? What would you say are like kind of the can't-miss spots, or even just types of cuisine they should get while they're here?

Okay, so, but are we talking about like an extravagant, like the best meal, or we're talking about like, you gotta go to this taco stand. I think it's all up for grabs. I think if you want to talk about, you know, a little Korean barbecue place, that's fine. If you want to talk about a five-star restaurant, that's fine. I mean, yeah, that's tough. I would, I'll give shouts out to Marvin, and Alimento. Okay.

Those are two restaurants. He's naming two restaurants that his friends own. My friends own. My friends own. One's the manager, and the other one, he's the head chef. So they are both really, really great restaurants. Shout out to my boys, the LA boys. But I mean, yeah, definitely, I would say, well, I don't want to say, because then they'll

go to it. But yeah, there's some great ramen places. Well, you don't want to say because you don't want to keep like, it's any cred, you don't want to have these. Come on. Give it to the Doughboy's friends. But yeah, you should hit up Pine Burger, it's probably the best burger, not counting the one we're discussing today.

I would say hit up, yeah. This is Capo? I would say go to Capo. Oh, yeah, like Capo. Go to, sure, Parks Barbecue is pretty classic for like a regular classic way. Give us a ramen place. Don't tease us. Don't knock, tease us, man.

Well, I would actually recommend, yeah, well, there's Daikokuya, Sugita, or Sintoka, those are the, I think it's the Triforce of the, I mean, there's other great ones, but that's like the most classic ones. So I will say that I had an interest in food. And then I, you know, I became close with Armin, and he's laughing at that because in his head, that's like a fat joke already, is that I had an interest in food. That is not true. I just thought it was, I had an interest in food, it's already its own comedic, as do

all humans. Yeah, it's kind of maybe an odd statement, I could see that. But also, I was just playing straight, man. Do you never play straight? Oh, anyways. Armin and I, Armin had, Armin really liked his food spots, and you know, we became better friends, and we would go to a lot of places. Armin showed me some of the best restaurants in Los Angeles.

I showed him a couple of gems myself, I've thrown a couple of good ones at him. But Armin has shown me some really, really great places, a lot of great memories from those places. I think so nice, I don't really understand, thank you. We used to have a dinner, we called Guys Night, even though it's a lame name, where me, Armin, Harris, Whittles, and Matt Koalic all went out for dinner, and we went to different, on Thursday nights, we went. Yeah, you mentioned on the podcast before, anyway, the Koalic episode, we talked about

this a little bit. Yeah, and we would go out to some fancy dinners, and it would be, it was a great time, it was always very enjoyable. We went to lorries, and a lot of, we would always kind of try to hit new restaurants. I don't, you know. Around LA. I have a thing about that, if you guys want to discuss. Yeah, go for it.

Yeah. Well, like, I don't know, oh, this is silly. Just go ahead. You know, people love going to new restaurants, and I feel like I hate it, and it's my nightmare, because it's always, I have a weird thing where if you're going to waste space in your stomach, like if I didn't like the meal, that used to make me very depressed. Do you mean new restaurants as in like a new place, or places that you haven't tried before, like new to you?

Yeah, new to me. Okay, I gotcha. Or new to everyone, it feels like, it's like, any first time experience you're less excited about? Yes, I would prefer somebody to really tell me that they went there, and it's good. Gotcha. Very fearful. So as nice as I'm being an arm, and you know, we bump heads being close friends, I like

to go to new restaurants, try new stuff, Armin can be okay going to the same place a lot. He can go to the same place quite a bit, you know, that's true. Yeah, like in Goodfellas. Yeah, I guess you could say like in Goodfellas, or like the Godfather. What? I think, no, I think it's a convention of the mob movie genre, that there's like a home based restaurant that they're going to, that's the whole thing, Artie Bucco and the Sopranos,

right? They're always going to Artie's restaurant. That's fair, but then if you want, oh no, hamburger boy, hamburger boy. My nickname hasn't really caught on. I think that that's fine, but like the Goodfellas didn't go to a faux place every day. No, no, there's was Italian products. There's Italian, they had a wide selection, you know, like you'll get, you'll get, you you'll crave fa, you know, multiple days in a row, and it can be tough.

And you know, I am also a fun guy, and I think it's fun when people say faux. I know it's not right, but it's like I allow it, and I think that that's the kind of guy I am, but some people, they don't allow it. I feel like there are a lot of places where the, because like there's a lot of restaurants, I don't know if this is a thing in other cities, but in LA there's a lot of fa, in Orange County, there's a lot of fa restaurants where there's some sort of fa pun, like fa show or absolutely fabulous, you know, and I feel like a lot of times it's like predicated on pronouncing that the fa as faux, you know, it's like friend or fa, but if you say it

as fa, then it does, the pun doesn't really work. So yeah, I think it's okay. 9021 fa. Oh, there's 9021 fa, yeah. Yeah. Faux, I guess you're supposed to say. Well, that's how they want. That's how they want you to say it.

Is this how the, this is good? Is this episode good? Is this podcast? Oh my God. This is dope. This is nice. Is Dope Boys the show good? No, no, I love, yeah, just this particular episode.

I feel like so far this is an, this is an interesting episode. I feel like this is going in a different direction than our normal discussions. Good, I want to say something. This is something I got to say then. Go for it. To the Dope Boys. Mm-hmm. You guys had Koalak in here.

Yeah. And he's in here spouting off all this nonsense that he's on dates with Beyonce and stuff. Right? Yeah. I feel like I would have been like, what do you mean? Are you sure it wasn't like a, it wasn't like a meet and hang out or were you on a double date with someone else? I think if you go back and listen to the tapes, I think that we had, if you listen to that

recording, I think we pressed him on that interview and we got some details out, because he sort of threw it off there that like, oh yeah, I want to date with Beyonce. And we got some details out of him that it seemed like, it was like a day date. It seemed like it was born out of sympathy and that they went to Cold Stone Creamery, which isn't like you're sitting down and you're having a meal together. Because you're getting a little dessert and maybe you're sitting at a table outside. Maybe you're even getting it to go and eating it in the car. So yeah, I don't think this, you could say that Matt Koalak of the, formerly of the Birthday

Boys went on a full date with Beyonce. I don't think that's a problem. I have to guess that most of his dates are sympathy dates. Yeah. Okay. Well dude, just kidding around man. I didn't want to push him because you know how like you don't want to push. I didn't want to push him on the subject because you know, you don't want to push Frank Grimes

in the moments before he electrocuted himself trying to prove that Homer, he was as good as Homer Simpson. Well he didn't mean to push him. Yeah, that's true I guess. Listen, I just don't want to, maybe you know what, I believe that that happened somehow. I don't think they, I don't think Beyonce, I don't think Beyonce thought it was a date. I doubt Beyonce remembers it. I was, it was more humor based.

I don't want you guys to feel like I really thought he didn't push hard enough. And Beyonce's memoir, she writes that, this is a quote, quote, it's the driest I've ever was. Oh, her pus. Yeah, yes. That's part of the quote. That's what the joke was. I didn't want to say that.

I didn't know if we could talk about like blue humor. Of course. This is labeled explicit, this podcast, we don't, we don't try to go there but it does go there sometimes. You gotta, yeah, you trim your fingernails. See, this is what happened, this is exactly what happened with the Super Basketball brothers actually. If you get Armand in front of a microphone in a podcast studio, he just talks about

fingering. By the way, that's not true. I talk about lots of things and I'm pro all the good things. Well speaking of the good things, this is a place we're doing this week and I'm really glad you picked it because as a Southern Californian, lifelong Southern Californian myself, this is near and dear to my heart, as the person Mitch has labeled the burger boy, this is a place where, a place I have a very, maybe the first place I think of when I think of getting a burger in and out.

So Armand, what is your relationship with in and out and tell us about your, why you pick this place and why you feel how you do. All right, well, let me just start off by saying, I think in and out burger, besides that it is, it's like the Beatles of hamburgers and I feel like it's the, it just makes the more sense. It's the classic, it's what a hamburger is in the most classic sense. Sure. And it's just, if you look at it from the side, it's just a little rainbow of the colors

of the brown and the white and the yellow and the green and the red. It's truly, it is a beautiful thing and I feel like every burger in life is based around whether it's like that or there's fancy burgers and there's fast food burgers, but this feels like the most classic, what the definition is in my mind. So from that feeling in my heart, and it was very special, I mean, there's more locations now but there weren't as many and there's a mythology about it in my mind, like being born here and raised and people discuss and you had to drive so far. It's like the Beatles because it's the best, right?

Well, yeah, sure, yeah, well, yeah, I mean, I figured. It's not from England. There's not four of them. No, no, no, no. It's a metaphor, you see, when I say like the Beatles, I, based off of it, yes, if you think the Beatles are the best, which I guess you're right, if you don't, you still could acknowledge that they're cool, even if they're not your faves. So check them out.

But you mean in terms of, it's the peak of the form. This is like the fast food hamburger, this is it, and it's ideal iteration is what you can get at in an out burger. I just think it's, yeah, and then it's the bottom of the tree and then things spring out of it, all different kinds. Sure. That being said, obviously, it tastes like wonderful and I think it's the most magical tasting thing there is.

And I think there's a lot of people, there's a lot of haters, as they say, and they come around, they're like, well, I just would prefer a Carl's Jr. burger, like I don't really care and these fries are just like, whatever, dude, and I'm like, you're missing it all, you know, because those fries are their potatoes. The whole thing you said about the simplicity. Yes. That's what makes it sort of special and genius and they didn't mess around with like, you know, little popper, pinky poppers that.

No, yeah, they don't have a bunch of crazy apps or anything, jalapeno poppers, chicken because they don't have anything, you know, they don't even have a chicken sandwich. They have on the menu and I just know it in my head. They have a hamburger, a cheeseburger, the double, double, which is double meat, double cheese and they have fries and that's it for food. Those are your options and then you can also get drinks, including shakes. So yeah, it is a very simple, focused, almost like at this point, almost outrageously simple menu.

There's just not any, because even the hamburgers are just all variations on the exact same thing. It's just more or less of the core ingredients. Let's not forget the cups are beautiful, the bag, everything about it makes me feel classic yet. The gorgeous roasts. Yeah, well, there's a little secret, little numbers on there or something, but it doesn't really seem to be.

It doesn't bother me too much, actually. It's gonna be a huge problem and that would argue that, you know, I don't like to get mad at, well, I don't know what they've done, I don't know if there's like evil secrets, but for the most part, they seem to be a very chill crew. Yeah, they haven't made any strange stances and they don't seem like to discriminate too much. I don't necessarily know too much. Yeah, I don't think they have it.

That's true, not at all, but I'm okay with that if they're gonna put their, you know, and I think most of California seems to be on board with it. We know about it. Yeah, well, that's the thing and to touch on this, and if anyone's not familiar with this. So, Armin mentioned the packaging, you know, everything, the aesthetics of the packaging are very pleasing. It's just kind of this very simple red and white look with palm trees, yeah, it feels

very SoCal, but the little hint of religiosity on it is if you flip over your cup, you flip over your fries, your little fry boat, there are just various Bible verses that are written on it and not the full Bible verse, it'll just say like Revelation 3.20 or Matthew 6.19 and then that's it and that's the only hint that you're getting that there's any sort of Jesus-y stuff going on within and out at all. It's very subtle, it's not really in your face. Kind of the opposite of what we discussed on our Chick-fil-A episode where they're just very out front and like, you know, we're evangelicals and these are our political beliefs.

It's a very different approach and one that, you know, like on a pretty secular part of the country, in being California and the American West, people have just sort of accepted it and it doesn't really bother anyone. On another period, if you listen close enough, Armin will whisper lines from the Torah. I, yeah, that's true. That's true. Yeah, okay. He's right.

Okay. Little Easter egg. Little Easter egg. Watch another period carefully. I could do, yeah, prayers of the bread and wine. You know some of that stuff. That's true. I only know those.

Anyway. As a man of Jewish faith, Armin. Yes. Well, yes. As a man who was raised Jewish, from a Jewish family, how do you feel about the Christian propaganda, you could even call it, that's subtly integrated into the in and out packaging? Well, like I said, it doesn't bother me at all. I would argue that I had I not, you know, friends in the internet who knows when I would

have found out. I mean, it definitely was the thing we discussed, but you know, I thought you meant propaganda like Santa Claus and so I was like, yeah, that is the best. That's classic. And I celebrated Christmas, so I don't know, you know, religion's a tough one. I was going to take Armin to church one time. Yeah, I went one time, I ate one in the little wafers. I thought I was being.

Who are you supposed to do that? Oh, yeah, they were handing them out and I just went in. I think at a Catholic church, I don't think you can do that, but I think if you're going to a more casual Protestant church, usually it's going to go right with a non-member. I may have been being a little prankster or something. I was a young man. Being a little noddy. That's very funny.

I was like, you know, 12 or something. Sure. You know, back then it was like Jesus was scarier, right? Yeah. He's less scarier over years. Now, these jokes are normal. You know what I mean? Mm-hmm.

You know, like when Dogma came out or something, ooh, they were. Oh, I got you. Yeah. We lived, I dressed as him in eighth grade for Halloween and it was like, ooh, Armin. Sure. But I think it was just like. Did you really? Yeah, I mean, that's just like little kids stuff that you think you're being like.

I think people were like terrified of Jesus right until Dogma came out and then ever since then we haven't been afraid of him. You know what I mean? I mean, hey, I think he's a great, nice person. Yeah, but I love all the face. That's good, because I'm a Catholic boy, he's a Jewish boy, that's another part of our dynamic. I would argue I'm unreligious.

Sure. And my face is Jewish and that's why I can't be like any Westerns. I had an audition once and they said that I was Jewish looking. Ooh, was this for a million ways to die in the West? No, no, it was for, nope, insert joke here. 310 to Yuma, let's say. Oh, I know what it was for, sorry. Anyways, moving on.

Interesting. I was actually told to bring this up. What? One of our good friends, Harris, didn't like it in Alperger. Isn't that true? Yeah, well, he was a real piece of shit. And definitely had a weird thing against him in Alperger. That's true.

That is true. I don't want to discuss this that much, but yes, if you go on a road trip, I would want to go there. He would prefer those pinky poppers and that is stupid. Gotcha, buddy. Okay. So when I first got out here, I think when I got out here, I had heard about in and out burger and I had heard that it was really good and I want to try it and I was excited

about it. And I got a double double and I don't even think I got animal style the first time and I did. I really did enjoy it and it made sense that it was well liked. I still like and I remember not being too sold on their fries, but we'll get into this a little later and I was like, oh, that's good. It's good or whatever. And then as time went on, I appreciated everything all of in and out burger more and more and

more. But sometimes I'm just not and sometimes I could go for like a I don't always crave in and out burger. It's kind of that sort of thing of like when you want a good pizza or you want Domino's. I want Carl's Jr. and my buddy, I remember when my friend was here, my buddy, Micas. He's East Coast guy. For real. You guys all know him.

Yeah. For real. He's one of my friends. He was not the one who did this thing. Charno. Charno is a fake one. Chankton is who you meant. I took Micas to in and out burger and he didn't like it.

So like he thought Carl's Jr. was the best burger he had out here. Well, I think there's definitely, I think definitely people face the expectation of hearing all this hype, this West Coast hype of like in and out burger. This is the fucking shit. This is the best burger. And you know, certainly growing up, it was a treat for me and we were excited to go there when we go once every two weeks, make that lengthy drive to, I don't remember where the location was.

Might have been Bellflower, whichever one we were getting the whichever in and out we were waiting at. But like, I feel like a lot of people hear about it and then they come here and they have it in adulthood. And then they're mentally comparing it to every burger they've ever had in their life and they're finding ones that they think are better than it. And so it just doesn't hit those expectations. And I would say, I don't think it's flat out like, okay, this is for sure, this is the

best burger in the world. Like you can't, you cannot find a better burger. But I think it's in terms of quality, price point and consistency. It is just the elite fast food burger. Right. Yeah. Like the number one. Classic.

I can agree with that. And I do agree with that. It's very, very good. Here's my counterpoint though is it takes so long in and out just takes, it's just, it takes too long. I mean, it's because of their popularity. It's just, you go in there and every in and out I pull into it just as a fucking madhouse I feel like.

And I enjoy it. I probably would get it more, but you know, that means expansion, that means more restaurants and that means maybe a diminished product. Even though this is a chain that has multiple locations, I just getting, getting in and out of that place is, you know, I don't think, I don't think that the name of the restaurant is, is, is really realistic. I don't think you're in and out. I think it's, I think the quality of the burger is good.

I just, it gives me anxiety, which we experienced an arm and an eye. We went together. We experienced a little bit on our trip there. Let's have a, hold on. See, I, in general, the past couple of years, I don't love to be in public or see other human beings and I've lost my mind. It's good. It's very healthy.

So that would make more sense why we went into the crowded restaurant where the families ran free. I forced them to eat inside the in and out burger. But definitely I don't have this viewpoint of the negative thing, but yes, we went on the day of reckoning and I think everyone had just left Universal Studios. We went there on a Tuesday night at like 9 p.m. The summer vacation is closing and the children were free in the restaurant. Yeah.

And we went to this, the Universal, Universal City location, I guess it's called on Cahuenga. It was, yeah, it was, it was, it was really, we pulled in and the drive-thru line was long and Armin was kind of pushing for the drive-thru and I thought we should sit inside and get the whole experience. Sure. And we couldn't find a spot. We went out and parked on the street. And then yeah, it kind of felt like a little bit of a reckoning in there.

There were so many, there were a bunch of families and there were so many kids and it was just kind of, it was kind of wild. It's a little crazy there. I mean, I've been to In-N-Out before where you will hear them yell at the register, line out the door because literally the line is so long that it is wrapped around the restaurant and is going out through the exit. So yeah, it's a little, it can be a little manic there, but I, you know, I want to confront you with a little something that in the legal profession, they call evidence, which is,

you talked about it taking a long time and I get that it's very crowded, but I think part of how In-N-Out excels is that they quickly get your order out. Today I came at the height of the lunch rush. I went to the Marina Del Rey location and it's one that is located in the same parking lot as a Costco. So it's like, this is a very high traffic location. I know the one. Yeah.

And there was, you know, a line basically to the door, probably 20 people in front of me. The number I got was, was 65 and shortly after I received the 65, I heard them call 41, which makes you think like, oh, I'm in for a wait. This is going to be a while. I opened my stopwatch app, I hit it and I stopped it again when they called out my number and I walked to the register. Time elapsed between when I placed my order at the register and when I had my food in

my hands, eight minutes, 38 seconds. Or at the height of the lunch rush, that's pretty good. And I don't think that's much longer than you'd wait at like an Arby's or Wendy's. I will say, can I say one thing? Yes. That might help. Go ahead. I think it's possible that when you order animal fries, it takes a little longer as

that is a specialty thing. That is true. That's true. And that's possible that we did such a thing and maybe that's, you know, that takes longer. I'm going to throw that out there. It's not an everyday dish. That definitely does. And that gets to, you know, the secret menu, the not so secret menu they call it.

This is one thing that one of in and out signatures is that they have a bunch of items that you can get that aren't on their regular menu, ways you can basically modify things, customize them. And one of those things is animal fries, which is basically, it's the regular fries, but it's got a slight, it's got American cheese on top of it. And then they're spread, which is kind of like a Thousand Island and grilled onions. You can also get your burger animal style, which is a similar sort of treatment, more of like a grilled onions versus the raw onions.

And pickles. And pickles. Yeah. And more sauce, I think. Yeah. You can also get your burger protein style, which is in lieu of the bun, it's like wrapped in lettuce. And that's kind of a thing that a lot of chains have adopted as a way of presenting like a

low-carb burger. That's my life right now. That's right. So yeah, if you do that kind of customization, your order definitely takes longer. But if you order from the base menu, they'll get your food out quickly because they're a machine there. And can I recommend something to the viewers? Of course.

That's probably why you're here. I don't know what's happening. I just wanted everyone to know that what I do in and out burger is I order the double double with both kinds of onions. So you still have the crunch and the sensation and the genius of onions, which I didn't realize people don't like onions, but they're quite beautiful. And it's something you guys should check out and try. And I don't think you need those jalapenos on there.

Just be free. Yes, because you can add, you can add to add chilies and they'll put some chili peppers on it, which gives a little bit of heat. That's actually a nice little in and out hack that I haven't heard before, Armand. Thank you. Raw onions and grilled onions. I've never heard Armand talk the most serious I've ever heard him speak about onions. So that makes sense.

I actually took Armand's hack. The idea of a secret menu was very, I remember when I first found it out and I was like, oh, that's exciting. And I think back, especially a decade ago or whatever, it was cool to be like, oh, you can get an animal style. And I thought that not everyone actually did know that back then. With the internet, I think everybody knows everything. Yeah, the internet has really ruined the secret club that you're in.

It's just out there now. You can go on in and out's website and they just tell you what the secret menu is. That's true. They're just like, well, everything's out there, out in the open. And I also think the internet, before I moved to LA, I don't think I really knew about in an outburger. Now I feel like it's pretty well known. I think it's pretty universally known and maybe that's another thing of the changing

times. It's just everyone has heard about it. And it's also spread a little bit across, not across the country. Yeah. Well, it's in the two biggest states in the nation, California and Texas at this point. So yeah, it's certainly Las Vegas is there, so yeah. It was mentioned in the Big Lebowski and that really boosted it. You know, our buddy Evan Susser texted me about that and he was talking about that.

That's kind of like, he was kind of drawing a comparison between, just as the Big Lebowski is kind of talked about so much that it kind of reaches a point where maybe it's oversaturated and becomes maybe a little overrated. It's kind of the same thing within an outburger of just like, it's talked about so much. Can I have a timeout though? Go ahead. I just don't, I feel like the Big Lebowski is never overrated and let's keep it in its classic status as it is, one of the greatest films I've ever seen.

Overrated might be the wrong term, but just like people's expectations are colored. Like the Beatles. Yes. Well, I feel like Pete, I don't know if I'd say the Beatles, but I- People are, people don't like the Beatles. You think they're people who come into the Beatles as skeptics and they're just like Yeah, they're like, I've heard the Ten Hits, they're stupid, they're famous, they represent mediocrity, popularity, I guess that's, you're right, they're famous, so they're not really

underrated. But maybe that is like a cool kid reaction that I'm just not familiar with. Yes. But yeah, definitely I feel like people approaching an outburger is kind of like, with a little bit of leadism and they're like, show me what you got in an outburger. Like the Lakers. Yeah, sure. I think that maybe that's a more fair comparison.

I don't, we haven't figured out the right analogy. We've called in an outburger a hundred different things. We haven't really picked out what it is. Super Mario World, in the sense that it has secrets. Yeah, it's a lot like Super Mario World. It is. It's a lot like Super Mario World, too. And yet, people dismiss it as a children's game.

Yeah, people think of In-N-Out as a children's, what? They got confused. Hey, man. There's the guy who loves, I'm a gamer. I'm a gamer, too. That's the thing upon this. We're all gamers. No, I'm not really.

We're all Nintendo fans, though. I mean, yeah. Anything past N64, I say I don't understand. But anyway, we're... You still got your systems, though. Oh, yeah, but you can play the old games with my new one. That's true. Every time I go through any sort of breakup, I might buy a system.

I mean, did you play... I don't know, that's true. Did you play Super Mario 3D World? Yes, I don't, I didn't like it. You didn't like it. I know. Because I thought that was one of the high points of the series. I thought it was a really well-done game.

I haven't really liked, well, I could talk about, I think they've disgraced Mario and changed his... Oh, no. I think he's gone from the coolest, funniest guy to just like a denim jeans wearing skinnier like for children. He's like a little... He's just changed. I just, I wish they had kept him.

I kind of agree with Armourn on that, actually. I don't think Mario's character design has become particularly edgy or hip. I feel like he's kind of the same... So the opposite of edgy and hip, he's become... Like they've changed him from like a hero. He had some funny things about him. He liked pasta and he went on adventures and then turned him into this sort of like Mickey Mouse figure who's just only nice and no one wants to choose him in games because it's

like, eh, in fighting games or something. Well, he's like the default... I mean, that's maybe a criticism of being kind of jack of all trades master of none because I feel like in your Super Smash Brothers and your Mario Kart, he's kind of the default guy. He's like the average acceleration, the average top speed and people want to, I'll just go with a heavy guy or I'll go with someone who's very quick on their feet. So I feel like, I don't know, that feels like that's more a criticism of him just being

the average in terms of player attributes. I'm sure he was in it always. I think Mario 64 on Down on, he's kind of gone downhill a little bit. Yeah, they treat him like... Mario the character? Yeah, they've changed and they've treated him like he's some sort of... Is it, maybe it was N64 when they introduced, what's his name, Charles Martinette, is that the voice actor, the guy who voices Mario and is kind of like, it's a me, Mario started

coming in. Was it like the N64 version? But that was all right. I mean, he had done it in the cartoon and his voice had been like that. It was funny in that one, he falls asleep from being tied, but now every character falls asleep when you don't move the joystick. That may have been a rare instance. Yeah, go for it.

What was that? He was spraying things with the water. Mario Sunshine was a misfire. I feel like that was a game that didn't really work, but I think the Mario Galaxies are great and then Super Mario 3D World is really good. Maybe just have an aversion towards 3D gaming. It feels like it's easier and aimed at children. I was saying how in the old days, a Mario game was a game that existed, like adults

would play it or children because that is a game, you know what I mean, like it just comes out. I got you. And now it's like, we have a Mario game, that's for little kids. And then the adult games are for shooters. This is for adults, Resident Evil, I don't know, and it feels weird that he's no longer a non-man. A part of the conversation.

If you keep playing that Super Mario 3D World, though, once you get to those bonus worlds, I mean, that game can get pretty punishingly difficult. It's pretty accessible, but because some of it's later levels when you've actually beaten the main quest, that's pretty tricky. I 100% of it, and Wiger didn't. I couldn't beat the final level, and Mitch texted me tauntingly about it, because I didn't want to invest 10 hours of my life replaying the same. What were you going to say about him falling asleep?

I thought you had some sleep. Oh, I was going to just say that that was a rare instance where I feel like Mario had cribbed something from Sonic, because I think the first idle animation was Sonic the Hedgehog when you leave the controller alone and Sonic would tap his foot, and then they eventually, everyone appropriated that. But Mario falling asleep is really cute. Yeah, it was great. He's a very funny guy.

Yeah. Well. Or what are we talking about? I want to say that. I try to talk like you guys, like the Doughboys kind of talk. Don't do that. You don't have to change your cadence to your tone of voice or anything. Yes, I do.

No, you don't. I would say, though, okay, I do think like maybe the idea of In-N-Out Burger is the Mario of Smash Bros., Mario, not Mario Smash Bros., is the Mario of Burgers. Are you guys confusing everyone, except for like 10 people who will listen to this podcast? They love it. I think people know Mario. I think people know Mario. Yeah, he's famous.

Those are the Beatles. I'm saying all this obvious, famous stuff. I get the Mario comparison, because the In-N-Out Burger, it's like, it's really good. And I feel like a lot of people approach it with like a little bit of skepticism. And you know, there's certainly a lot of gamers who are, maybe you're Call of Duty guys, you're Halo fans who wouldn't want to touch Mario or think that's for kids or think it's stupid. And if they play a little bit, they think like, this is a little overrated, you know.

We somehow stumbled into something that worked. I gotta say, Southern California is taking just a lot of a, you guys are really claiming this burger thing and this fast food thing. I gotta say, I think that the hamburger was created on the East Coast. I'm almost 100% sure of it. Yeah, I think you're right. I don't know the exact, what's going on? What happened?

No, the East Coast in America. I think so. I think I saw something on Food Channel once where they went to the original burger place and it was like some little dive in New Hampshire where they like steamed the burgers in this old school oven or something like that. I think it's either Rhode Island or Connecticut. I don't know if we claimed it. Well I would say, you know, and also Big Huna Burger in Pulp Fiction, that was based

off of In-N-Out Burger. Well, the thing that I didn't realize. I didn't know that. I think I didn't realize about the burgers out here is that I think West Coast burgers, it's all about kind of like a classic burger out here. In times of change, but out here specifically, it's like lettuce, tomato, onion, and then some sort of like Big Mac-y type of sauce. It's a Thousand Island-y type of sauce.

Back East, that's not really the case. For time, I think the burger market has changed. It's pickles, tomato, I'm sorry, ketchup and mustard, and maybe onions and I think that's more. Like a backyard barbecue style. It's kind of more like, yeah, I would say that's kind of more of the classic cheeseburger. But that sounds like I'm on Doe Boys, right? Yeah.

Okay, see. You're on Doe Boys. You don't have to care about what you're doing on Doe Boys. You're on it. I mean, I'm not really a mustard on hamburger guy. And let me tell you why. Oh my fucking god. I mean, if you get a spicy mustard, sure.

We shouldn't have invited you to this. It feels like you're making fun of us. No, I'm- No, he is. What? I was merely trying to explain how cadences help your performance. All right. No, dude, don't tear down the wall of Doe Boys.

No, I'm not. Please let me on the show. The spread on In-N-Out, I feel like is probably where a lot of people's opinion lies because that is like kind of one of the overwhelming flavors you get from it, this kind of Thousand Irony. Masterpiece. Yeah, and I think it's a great sauce. I love that spread.

It's a great sauce. And that's the only sauce you're getting on it. You're not getting any mustard or ketchup. You're getting that spread and then all the rest of the moisture is coming from the meat itself, the lettuce and the tomato and the onion, the veggies you got on it. And I think it's pretty great. I will say also with that sauce, it's completely different from a Big Mac sauce and different from a Thousand Islands.

Also, I don't know if it's like a sauce that I would just, I mean, you don't like love any sauce on its own, you know, and wants to just take and eat a sauce. But In-N-Out sauce, I think it complements the burger so well. It just works really, really well with all the ingredients. Like Armin said, I mean, the rainbow thing is a little strange to me because it's kind of like a brownish red rainbow, but I got a picture of it. But as far as all those tastes working together, the sauce, the onion, the crispy onion, if you get the raw onion, it just works so, so well.

And the toasted bun, they do such a great job of every bite being such a kind of, you know, an enjoyable little masterpiece. Yeah, it's really, really good. It is. Yeah, that sponge dough bun is very nice. And also too, you know, if you're not craving the bun, I feel like the protein style burger wrapped in lettuce is the closest you can get in any burger chain to having the bunless burger taste like the real thing.

Like it's a very, very satisfying burger that sometimes I'm craving over the one, even if I'm not eating it for health reasons, I'm sometimes just prefer it to the one with the bun. I used to prefer for a little bit the, you can get it without meat, the grilled cheese style. Oh, they do have a nice grilled cheese. Yes. It's just all the other stuff and quite a tasty treat.

Check it out. Yeah. If you're not a meat eater. It's two slices. I think actually it is one of the better vegetarian fast food options. It's like two slices of cheese that they grill on the grill and they slide it on the burger with all the toppings. It's pretty great.

What a special place. We're having fun here. It's a good place. Is it the best burger place? I don't know. I don't know if it's the best. As far as like you said, a fast food burger place, yeah, it's up there in the top. There's probably a top five and if you include like, you know, five guys, maybe is the fifth

one or something. And I'm saying in and out, it beats five guys, but then like Shake Shack is probably going to be one of those, is going to be up there with it too. I haven't, I'm sorry, go ahead. It's just, I feel like it's close. I like Shake Shack. Yeah. I don't know if it's the clear 100% winner.

I think it's very, very good. I would say you're comparing like a delivery pizza to like a pizzeria mozza pizza. Yes. Okay. I feel like the shake should be. Yeah. Okay. Then that's fair.

I guess you're right. Like any sort of father's office sort of gourmet burger. Shake Shack though is kind of close to. I don't think Shake Shack is. And I think I have a lot of New Yorkers, the New York elitists who, you know, the subway writers who think that that's the greatest city in the world are the ones who are talking about. Here comes this Los Angeles fly.

We're talking about Shake Shack is so much better than In-N-Out. You can't compare them because it's four times the price. You're talking about an $8 burger versus a $2.50 burger. It's a completely different price category. It's not a fair comparison. And I would also say, I think the In-N-Out burger is better. I think it's better just as on a one to one, if I could choose one or the other, I would take it.

I would just say, oh, the Shake Shack one is so much better than you have to factor in into account how much it costs. And you know, the fact is, as a single person, if you're going to Shake Shack, you're going to spend $16 to $18. You're going to spend a lot of money to feed yourself versus if you're going to In-N-Out burger, you can get out of there for $7. Wow. That's a big difference.

That's a great point. The price, you know what? For the price, I guess you're right. There's not a burger that can beat it for the price. For the price alone. I mean, it's still a delicious burger no matter what, but the price point is huge. Yeah. I think it's worth considering.

And also too, it's been pretty stable over the years. It's not a thing that's really skyrocketed. They've sort of just kind of kept pace with the inflation. Let's talk fries a little bit. We haven't spent much time on that. You know, the fries, I feel like another place where there are people who like love the burger but don't like the fries. I like the fries.

I think the In-N-Out fries are some of my favorite fries. And I think they've just got a very, you know, they've got like kind of a very forward vegetable oil character to them, which, you know, I maybe turned some people off, but I really like it. And I think they take salt well. I think they're good in moist. And if you get a good one in the fry, it's good in crisp. The good little crumblies that are left at the end are very satisfying.

I don't know. What do you guys think about the fries? The fries are not my favorite, but they're not, I mean, they're not going to be my favorite fries, but I've grown to like them a lot more and appreciate them more. I think they're fries that you have to, they're very potato-y, which is, I mean, all fries are, but they literally, for people who haven't been in and out, they take the potato and they put it through a machine and that just, it's like fresh as you're there. You see it happening.

You see a chopper, which is a plus side, is a great plus side. You see how fresh it is. They toss them in the fryer. They're very interesting. They are, I guess, the fact that they're potato-y should be a good thing, you know what I mean? I'm sure, like, we're used to some McDonald's fries that have so many chemicals in them. Or they're deriving in a big bag of pre-frozen and they're thrown into the flash fryer. They're really good.

I think in and out fries, here's the thing. I mean, this is the thing with a lot of french fries, but especially with in and out fries, you want to eat them when they're hot. You don't, like, even within a meal, I think that they can take a dip in quality if you wait too long to finish them off. That's a great tip, actually. I think that's a really good point is that, yeah, these fries do not age well and they age really quickly, because once they're cold, I feel like they're not nearly as satisfying.

Armin, you're shaking your head. Oh, I just haven't noticed that. I do think it is, like, a thing. I don't want to say the word magical, but it is a potato and it goes well in your mouth. I guess I'm shocked by this whole, they get bad, like, ice cream level. I'd say they're good after I finish my, I don't need, hey, you guys eat your, Mitch seems to be the kind of guy who likes to eat one and then the other thing. I'm kind of like that, yeah.

Okay, I like to mix it, have a bite of burger, bite of fries, bite of burger. You know what? I like to have a bite of burger and then I like to finish my fries and then finish my burger. I want to end on my burger because the burger is usually the best. You don't think that you finish the burger and then if you're still hungry, you get these sort of leftover potatoes? I sometimes will do that, but I think that I've been trying to be conscious of is to

get myself just a one last bite of burger is really important to me. I want to end my meal with a bite of burger, especially I didn't know. It's a good burger. I want to have the last taste of that meal be that delicious burger or, you know, maybe a little bit of a shake if I had a shake. We didn't even discuss, but let's talk shakes. Sure. Before we do that, I'm just going to throw out there that what I like to do, I like to

get myself one of those cups, put a little bit of seven up in there and they're in and out lemonade, get that with your both kinds of onions, the Armin special. I had the Armin special in both ways and that's not strange. I mean that I had the Armin drink special and I had my double double the Armin way. Okay, so back to the shakes. The shakes are very, very thick, but they are tasty and good. I mean, you're not going to go too in and out for the shakes, but they're another high-quality product at In-N-Out Burger.

Classic three flavors, none of those Oreo poppy pinkies. No, they're not mixing in M&Ms or anything. Yeah, which is also... Why is Pinky's your name for like Carl's Jr.? I don't understand it. Why poppy's Pinky's? Actually, well, because originally Hardee's was entitled Pinky's and that's where I get that from.

I know that. I made it up. I'm sorry. Oh, my God. Armin, what the fuck? You little fiver. I'm sorry. I just...

Hi, Neal. Hi, Neal. Neal Campbell? Let's do a little skimp. You're a little low-key. You guys see the mask? Okay. I've seen the Jim Carrey mask.

I think he was... Well, I think it wasn't that literally low-key. That was his mask. Oh, I think so, yeah. It's something we don't discuss enough. You don't realize that he actually was the... Yeah, people think of low-key. Oh, my God.

Armin, what the fuck? You little fiver. I'm sorry. You don't realize that he actually was the... Yeah, people think of low-key through the Thor low-key or through the Avengers franchise, but he was present in the mask franchise with Jim Carrey and later with Jamie Kennedy. You are kind of similar to Jim Carrey in mask mode, I guess. Also maybe without mask mode, maybe that's sort of the two sides of myself.

Okay. Are Jim Carrey in the mask as himself and then him as the mask? Yeah. Oh. Yeah, maybe. Speaking of shakes. So they have vanilla, chocolate, and strawberry, and then another secret menu thing you can do is you can mix any flavors.

So if you want to get a Neapolitan you can, if you want to get a chocolate and vanilla you can. What I did today is I got a strawberry and vanilla. I usually find the strawberry ones a little sweet. I'm a huge vanilla shake fan. The strawberry and vanilla combo, pretty darn good. And you know the other thing I like to do at an outburger is discuss some people, but I like to take my fries.

Take leftovers off other people's. Yes. I eat it out of the trash can. Fries in the shake. No, fries in the shake, yeah. And I think it's just really good because those fries are salty and greasy and then you dip them in that sort of sweet dairy of the shake and I just think it's like a really nice mouthful.

I've done that since I was a kid and I do it pretty much every visit if I get a shake. I'm never really, you know, the other version of that is people do that with Wendy's and the Frosties. The Frosties, yeah. I've never really been a huge fan of that because I like the fries too much. I like them with tomato ketchup and then I also like to enjoy my Frosties. I've done it a couple of times. You know, it's not bad.

It's just, I don't want to make a habit out of it, you know? I've never done it, but I mean, I know it's famous and so, but I assume it could be good, but I've never done it. It's kind of, it's a little bit strange. I don't know. I've seen it and do it. I feel like, give it a shot. You know, try it, try it.

If you like it, great. If not, well, you wasted a couple fries and you've learned something. Yeah. Hey, it all comes out the same place, right? What? Is that a shit joke you just told? No. Oh.

Erase that. What is happening? We'll make an edit. Well, we'll edit 90% of what we've reported so far. We'll delete this episode. You know what? This episode will sit right next to the Super Basketball Brothers on the dusty shelf of feral audio.

Hey, their shelves are clean. They've got a very nice place here. I think the real Armin special is making a podcast unlistable. Wow, because I made a mustard joke earlier. You guys are mad. No, no, no. We love you. No, I can talk and do boys talk again.

I also will say that it's fun to give Armin a hard time. It is. And you know what? He's a very funny comedian. Whoa. Sometimes I like to make fun of him and call him the fool. He's a very funny, capable man. So, you know, like, why am I being so nice to you?

You are a fucking dumb weirdo, I guess. But he's not dumb. I know you're not dumb. We're a good boy. He's a very talented and funny comedian, but it is fun to make fun of him all the time because you say nonsense things. You say words like carf that don't make any sense sometimes. That's how you feel.

You feel it doesn't make sense. No, I know that the carf makes sense. Because I can see everyone in this room. I'm saying from another person's perspective. It could not make sense. You wear your mom's jacket. You can be silly. You can dance into a room.

Well, taking out of context, that sounds almost burger boy-esque. But I found a jacket that was a, never really worn by my mother. I just, it was from her closet. That's right. It's a purple, silly kind of coat that I wore. And now I think it's the style. The kids are wearing them all the time. I feel like you're a very stylish man.

I would say, you know, following what Mitch said. You're a very talented actor. You're charming. You've got a natural charisma and you have a very unique sense of style that I think a lot of people appreciate. You're a kooky guy. We know what we're getting ourselves into. But we're having fun.

And I think we're spending a lot of time giving and having an earnest discussion about in and out burger, which is a thing you genuinely care about. I think you've made a lot of really salient points in its favor. I can't believe, you know, you guys don't even have to, this is very nice, but you're both also talented. Oh my God, Jesus. In different ways. Listen, the thing I always get on, I'm referring for myself, you got to harness that power

for good. Oh, my God. You got to harness that kookiness. And me too, I have to harness, you know, one of the funniest guys that there is. Oh my God, oh my God. Is this too much for you that we're getting too real? Nothing's too much for me. I'm just listening.

One of the funniest guys I know, whatever. He's on a TV show now. He's doing great. Hey, I'm still the same old armored. Oh, Jesus Christ. Oh, I can't believe I tried to talk about something serious. I think that's, well, no, yeah, we all should strive for positive energy. Is that what you're saying?

I don't want to become a cynical person. I don't know what exactly I should, I know I'm just saying I don't know what I'm responding to, but I'm, of course, we all are trying to live our dreams in this sort of place. There are real problems in the world and we are the weirdest people to do this. And therefore, I owe it to them to let them feel my heart touch them like explode out of me. I should be freer even and let them feel me in a... Let the world see you. That's, I guess, what my point is.

You've been hiding away from the world for too long. I think it's time for Armand to free himself. Have you agreed with that tweet at us hashtag free yourself, Armand? Let's see if people agree. Yay. I think this podcast was very interesting in terms of where we went in terms of this discussion, but I do think we talked a lot about it in Out Burger. And so, I think at this point, the thing to do is to go around and give our closing thoughts on this franchise

and go ahead and assign it a rating. So, Armand, we'll start with you and then when you're... What's your trepidation? It's basic forks. Yes, I was going to give the key. It's based on one to five forks, five forks being nice. I like your handling of that too. It seemed like a guy who was trying to mediate something and also back out of the room at the same time.

Well, as a guy who once played a character named Frankie Forkson, I can safely say that I'm no stranger to forks. And so, that being said, I would like to obviously give it five forks. So, your wrap-up was about how you're familiar with forks instead of anything about in and out burger? Well, it was the preamble. Okay, okay. Yeah, I would say, guys, well, I already said it. Yeah, you guys, it's just a magical place.

It's got a lot of history. When it first opened in Westwood, it was a little tale real fast. It was very exciting for me. That was closer to where I lived and my family and my extended family. We went there and we bought about maybe 45 burgers and we brought them all back to the house. We all ate them like monsters and we didn't waste any, though, so don't worry, fans. That's okay. Is that the end?

Okay, Harman's nodding his head. He's buried his head in his hands. All right, sure. That is a nice story. Sure. Let's move on to Mitch. Okay, I like it in Alberta. There's been times where I'm saying, what's the big deal?

I really, truly like it. You know what they have? The patties are nice and thin and cooked fresh to order. The cheeseburger is just the crunch and the satisfaction you get with each bite is really, really amazing. And also, we didn't talk about this, but you can do a mustard fried burger where they'll pan fry your burger in mustard, which is really great, too. It's maybe not my favorite burger in the world, but it's way, way up there and there's no nodding. I mean, our experience when we were in there, it was kind of a madhouse. It was kind of messy.

There was ketchup from the people in the stores, kind of like everywhere. And the lemonade was out and it was just really kind of chaotic. And I sometimes think of that and I sometimes get hesitant to go to it because I just, because I know that that line is kind of too much and it's just too much going on. And even though you're right, they do do a good job. They get your order out pretty quick. It's just because it's so popular can be a little bit chaotic. That being said, for a fast food burger for the price, it's so good. The fries aren't my favorite.

It's still really good. The shakes are good. The almond special is good because I got a double-double animal style and I got the raw onions on it and it was really, really a nice little treat. And the chocolate shake I got was great. And we also got animal fries. We didn't tell them that. We got meals and we split animal fries and regular fries. I don't even love the animal fries, but they're good, too.

Five forks. I love it. What can I say? It's great. I love it in and out burger. It's maybe my favorite fast food restaurant. It's certainly up there with Del Taco. Up there with Del Taco.

In my mind. In my mind. In my mind. In my mind. I'm talking personally. I'm not talking... Let's not turn this into a Del Taco versus Taco Bell debate. We've already had that.

I don't even... We'll revisit that when we do our Del Taco episode. But me personally, let's just say a focus on in and out. In and out is one of my favorite fast food places. Yesterday, I went with a friend of the podcast, Jordan Morris, who I work with at a midnight who has been on the show before. After work, we went to this place called a Petit Tois. It's this fancy little hole in the wall French bistro in Hollywood.

And they have this $18 burger called the Big Mech that's got foie gras on it. And it comes all a cart for $18. And fries you get on the side for $6. So $24 for a burger and fries. And it was good. It was really, really good. I don't think it was as good as the double double and fries I had today in and out burger. Wow.

And I think that's just a thing that you can always say like maybe it's not the best burger in the world, but it's an elite fast food burger. It's just consistently up there. Maybe it's not Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, the greatest NBA center of all time perhaps. Maybe it's not that versus perhaps Bill Russell you could put in that conversation. Maybe it's not that, but it's definitely, you know, it's an elite ball player. It's somewhat who is a perennial all star. It's a Magic Johnson maybe.

It's a, well, I can say this analogy is completely fucked. We have not found something that we can parallel in and out burger. We haven't found a celebrity or an athlete or a video game character or a band. We just haven't figured it out. In and out burger is its own thing. It's fucking great. It doesn't cost a lot of money. If you come to LA or you come to California, you come to a western state and you're not

familiar with it. Try it out. Don't have the expectations of this is going to be a burger nirvana, but have the expectations of this will be a good burger and it will deliver and it delivers consistently at the same quality at all the different franchises that it has, which I think for a chain restaurant focused podcast is a key thing. Every in and out burger you have at any in and out burger location is going to be at an exceptional quality.

And that's just a thing that you have to keep in mind when rating this franchise. As far as I'm concerned, this is everything that a fast food restaurant should be. This is everything that a chain restaurant should be. This is what a hamburger is all about. Yes. Five forks for in and out burger. Wow. Five forks.

Welcome to the platinum plate club. You're the first member. Wow. Wow. You blew that review out of the water there, Nick. You earned that name the burger boy. That was really impressive. It comes from a place of passion.

A place of everything he said. Just really caring about, they really care about what they do and that comes across in their product. And I think that's a thing you look for in a chain and it just, it really makes me appreciate it. It's well run and we didn't even talk about the service. The employees are always really nice. Great employees.

But that idea you were saying about consistency, like even on its worst day, it's still pretty good. Yes. Sometimes you go somewhere, it's like, oh, they're on fire today. Well, Nick said it better. I should have just left it with that. No, it's their consistent and they deliver. And you're right.

In terms of their employment and everything, they pay their employees well. They provide them with healthcare. They hire very good people. The customer service is great. And those are things to keep in mind too. Maybe you are going to be waiting a little while sometimes. Maybe that drive through line is going to be backed up a little bit. But when you get to that drive through window, the person helping you out is going to be

friendly and attentive. And I think that's another thing that just speaks in terms of the quality of the overall in and out burger experience. Quickly, just want to say two things. Yes. Animal style fries or regular fries? What would you rather do in an animal? Regular fries.

Regular fries too. But I'll get the animal fries sometimes. Yeah, as a special treat, animal fries are more exciting, but you can't always have a banana split sometimes. Yeah. I think animal fries might be the weakest of all their menu items. And I still love them. That's an early dog.

I'm sorry. But I still love, I still enjoy them quite a bit. Also, I just want to talk about thin burger patties. I just, I get to hit that home. Thin burger patties are the way to go, man. I feel like so many places try to beef up their patties and give you a thick burger patty and in and out just does these succulent thin, they're thin and just perfect tasting and there's two of them on top of each other and they work really, really well.

And that just should go to show anyone who thinks the bigger the better. Those thin patties, I think, can be just as juicy and delicious and tasty. Season it, give it some surface area. Yeah, it doesn't need to be this big bloated orb of meat. It's about the whole thing, but the whole rainbow. It's all the taste together. I'm with you on the rainbow, by the way, Armin. I think that's a, it actually, it does kind of have all those colors in there and I think

that's part of what's pleasing about it. All right. And we'll do it for our discussion of an out burger so that they're also in the, what was it called again? The Silver Spatula Handholding Club? Because we're all, we've all agreed on the same score and then the, it was Platinum Plate Club, right? That's the one if everything gets a perfect fives from their guests.

Armin, that's, it's the first one. Wow. This is a special episode. I think deserved. I think we're glad that it's with you and we're glad that it's in an out burger. I'm glad I could be here and spread the word. Silver Spatula Handholding Club. It's got, it's got the Platinum Plate.

Wow. It's, it's a, this is, this is a, this is a big one. Does it have, does it have the Spoon Man stamp of approval or is that only for snacks? I'll give it this, I'll give it the Spoon Man stamp of approval. Oh my God. Armin, you want to give it some, some sort of award? Yeah. Right now?

Yeah. Oh yeah. It's, it's very good. It's a spicy, I don't have an award. You were, you were almost there. You just had to say something after spicy. I know, but if I'd said meatball. You could have said it's the spicy award, which wouldn't have made sense, but.

I'd say it's the classic award and it falls in the category of classic, dude. I probably shouldn't have said that. That's like an almost famous, okay, sorry. This is, I mean, I think this is part of, of your charm, Armin, is that you are so, you are, you have like a great mind, but then you also have so much self-doubt that kind of needlessly comes out. And so you, you commit to something and then you bail on it and, you know, but that, that's part of, that's got its own sort of charm. Yes.

Well, it depends. I mean, but, you know, if you hire me, I will commit. I think that's, yeah, I think that's borne out. I forget who said this. A lot of casting directors listen to this show. I don't, I don't know who to attribute this, this quote to, but some, maybe it was Bessar who said this about Armin, but he was said, he's like Woody Allen, if Woody Allen never read a book. No, no, no, no time out.

It was actually, I think it was Scott and he said, It was Ockerman? Okay. Yeah, Woody Allen, if he never didn't read as many books and did LSD or something like that. Oh. It was, well, so it's worse that I gave the quote better? That was like worse. I thought my joke was just harsh.

I thought it was a nice punchy joke. It was, but I felt bad for like, you know, the fat Jewish. I got to give the, just kidding, delete this part. And I will say, I know Armin has read many books. He's read Lord of the Rings. No, I have not read as many as Woody Allen, the great, or maybe I've read as many as Scott. Oh my God. I would like to say our listeners aren't going to be able to know this,

but Armin more than any other guest has made use of this space. He's really been exploring the studio as we've been going, standing up, pacing around, leaning on his chair. It's really been a sight to see. And the mic just stays in one place. I don't know how much of a good thing that is. We'll see how that comes across. All right, that'll do it for our discussion of In-N-Out Burger.

It's time for another segment we've done before. This is Last Meal. For this exercise, you've been sentenced to death. Oh no. So Mitch, let's figure out what crime Armin would do that would warrant capital punishment. It's the future. And the Lakers Celtics rivalry has gotten to new heights. Celtics fans have taken over the world.

And then now it's illegal and punishable by death. If you like the Lakers. So like me wearing my Lakers Truckers hat as I am in the studio as we're recording, I would be sentenced to death. You'd be sentenced to death. Okay. Armin one day says he's had enough. He definitely wears his Kobe Bryant jersey.

Yeah, this is like a beautiful story. Perhaps in the future, perhaps he's wearing his D'Angelo Russell jersey. His D'Angelo Russell jersey. I'll be one of those guys that wears it. Still wears the Kobe. Kobe will still be playing too at this point. Aw. Okay.

And he's arrested. And they decide, also it's a cruel way, so the way that they kill you, it's a cruel way in which they get Kobe Bryant now shackled and imprisoned. And Kobe's going to dunk Armin into a vat of acid. Hold on. So being a Lakers fan is illegal. So Kobe Bryant has been arrested because he was a Laker, but he hasn't been executed.

Instead, he's being against his will. He's being forced to dunk Lakers fans into vat of acid and kind of like this Pacifician torture that he has to live out every day. Okay. It's a dystopia. It's a really, I mean, I think that this is a terrible future. I don't want this to happen. No, well, I'm kind of like a Nelson Mandela figure.

Yeah. Because I was sentenced wrongfully. I would say so in this scenario. I was just assuming that there was a lot of people trying to get me out of prison. I certainly would be. Okay, yeah. Patitions. People are chanting for you, yeah.

I assume that, but please go on. So before you get dunked by Kobe into the vat of acid, you get your chance for your dream meal. One last meal. One last meal. What are you going to get? Well, okay. It can be anything.

It can be anything. It could also be something futuristic. Yeah, real fast here. Is this a thing where like I can choose like three courses or can I? You can choose whatever you like. You have to be like, if I said sushi, I can't have like also French fries. No, you can't also. You can get whatever you like.

And for many restaurants, just think of your favorite thing, favorite foods from any restaurant. They'll go anywhere for you. This is going to sound really bad, but my instinct initially when you said that was to like get a bunch of chicken McNuggets. So I'd like to put that in the meal. I like that choice because I feel like my brain goes to my childhood and to how meaningful those were to me at some point and how I feel like if it was my last meal, I won't feel sick after.

And you also take some power back because you get to dunk the nuggets into like a sauce when you're about to be dunked yourself. So I mean, well, it's tough because what I'd like to do is have some sort of sushi, maybe some Korean Namyang, some chicken nuggets, you know, maybe a nice fried, not fried. Although I do love fried chicken. I don't know if I say like my mom's chicken. I don't know what I'm doing, but you can literally. So right now we have a 20 piece chicken nugget from McDonald's.

What kind of sauce are you getting with that? I mean, I guess if it's my last meal, I would get barbecue sauce, but I currently today I would probably choose that sour sweet and sour, but I see how that's really not the greatest sauce. So you got a side of 20 chicken McNuggets. Then you got a Korean dish, you said. Yeah. There's the cold noodles.

Yeah. Is it like a savory noodles? Describe it for us. It's where you put the mustard and vinegar inside and it's got the, I don't know what the noodles are made of, but they're definitely magical in their own way. I mean, yeah, I guess I would want some sushi in there or maybe some ramen too. Now what kind of sushi do you fancy? Just the good.

This is the best kind. I could just have some classics. What kind of, you mean like the restaurants? You know, do you like like a salmon nigiri? Do you like like a tuna roll? What are you into? Or are you just like a sampler? I just like, yeah, when they give, yeah, the omakase.

I mean, I, in my mind right now, I'm thinking of like really boring things like salmon or something, but I don't know about the sushi guys. I just, maybe a hand roll. Okay. Oh yeah. Okay. Of, you know, Toro. Maybe a nice ramen, salt ramen from Santoga and a steak.

Listen, this is such a, I'm sorry, I don't know, but I, my mind went to chicken McNuggets, so that's, if I'm gonna die, I might grab some. It's like, yeah. It's something kind of like a Vegas buffet, like a panoply of different things. Yeah, you have a huge, huge, huge last meal. I just don't want to, yeah, I would eat everything at all different things. I wouldn't probably have dessert. No dessert.

It's just like he said, I want my last bite to be the burger. Wow. So what's the burger in this scenario? The McNuggets. Oh, in and out burger. Oh, so you also wanted an out burger? Wait, you also wanted an out burger? Oh, I thought that was assumed.

Okay. Yeah. Maybe I don't need the steak. You're right. Who cares about steak? Just get it out of there. Wait, listen. In and out burger.

The small bowl of ramen. Maybe tonkatsu. The executioner is knocking your door and says, you got to figure this out. You got to give us some fucking answer. I mean, we have to edit out some of the things I said about the books, right? What? Well, 81 points. That's legendary.

I sat next to a guy at Staples once who was in the arena for that game. It was pretty amazing. He was talking to me about it. Did you go? Did you go to see that game? Or did you see it in person? Okay, well, this is like a truly a fucked up story, so I can't really get into it. This is, and this is the Kobe Bryant's, this is his game at Staples Center for the Lakers,

playing against the Toronto Raptors, scored 81 points in one game, second highest in NBA history, arguably the most impressive offensive performance ever. Wilt himself said so. Yeah. As they were trying to get him to 100 versus this game where he did it on his own. Anyway, it's a sad story, but no, I didn't end up going to that game. I didn't know that that would be the game. No one did.

So, life is full of choices. Because you go to a lot of Lakers games. Your family has season tickets. I see you there a lot. Yeah, I was raised to love the Lakers. I'm not some weirdo. It was supposed to be this way. Five forks to the Lakers, five forks to Kobe, and an outburger, which I bet he's had before.

And I picturing him bite into it is good enough for me to call it a day. Are you ending our podcast for us? The squish of his mouth against the crackles of the onions. Well, I wanted to just end this story. You ordered so much food that the guard comes in to get you. He trips and falls. You escape and you free Kobe and you two run off together. What an ending.

And it's like 1984. Like, where do we go? To Canada. You go to start over. With that meal, just for the purpose of the exercise, what beverage are you getting with all that food? Oh, well, if it's my last meal, I would get a vanilla malt. Oh, vanilla malt.

That's a good choice. And maybe also maybe Coca-Cola or something. You can't just have it. I feel like a shake is not... I actually had this discussion with my friend, Tim Deaton. A shake is not a drink, right? If you're going to get a shake, you need like a cup of water or something. Don't cry.

I agree with that. In heaven, if there was one, I think that the water tastes... It's milkshakes are water. Oh, interesting. They don't... They make me feel good like I'm drinking. They really quench you. They hydrate you in the same way.

That's interesting. Cool, huh? All right, great. Oh, God. That was last meal. It had a happy ending. We heard Armin's choices for the kind of food stuffs. He'd like to cram in his mouth thinking that it was the...

These were the last bites of food he was ever going to have. Which is pretty much every food that there was. Not Indian. All right. Just like a restaurant, we value your feedback. Let's open up the feedback. Today's email comes to us from Sean Sullivan. Sean writes,

This is a numbered list. One, when going out with a group for a birthday to a chain restaurant, whether friends or family, do you notify the restaurant that it is someone in the group's birthday or are you like me where the very idea of every server gathering around to sing the patented original birthday song is completely mortifying? Two, if you're stuck in the hellish reality where a restaurant has completely stopped service to sing the person you're sitting with happy birthday and serve them one slice of cake, do you also go ahead and order dessert?

And three, who has your favorite chain restaurant birthday production? I would like to nominate the Texas Road House who drag over a saddle bolted to a child's booster seat and routinely make adults climb aboard while the server encourages the entire restaurant to whoop and holler like a bunch of disgusting pig farmers. Love the podcast. Fuck Quincy, Sean from Brockton. Really? Yeah, that's how it ends.

Oh, Sean, you better fucking watch your back, buddy, when I'm back. My boy's not going to bring it, motherfucker. Nah, dude. That was cool, Sean. I have his email address too. He's a fucking dead man. I feel like, you know, like I like the birthday celebration at a restaurant, but it is a little embarrassing.

I'd prefer it not happen. I did, I have had it done to me as a kid. Actually, my 18th birthday, I went with my family to El Torrito and they did the, they sprung the happy birthday song on me and they do a thing where they put a, just to kind of answer all parts of this question at once. They kind of, they put the, they put like a big sombrero on your head and they like, I don't remember they're singing like their kind of Latin flavored happy birthday variant and yeah, I was like, I was fine.

I'm able to roll with it, but it is a little embarrassing. It makes me a little self-conscious. I don't know. I kind of like a more subtle birthday presentation. Maybe if they just sort of sneak you a piece of cake or something and they're like, like happy birthday, we don't make a big show of it. That's kind of what I prefer. I don't know.

What about you guys? I love telling people at restaurants that it's someone's birthday and I want them to bring out a cake. They don't have to make a big deal out of it. I just like a, you know, like singing happy birthday and getting a little piece of cake to whoever's birthday it is is nice. I, you know, like the one that I've seen, that's like a big celebration. I'm kind of, I like to there to be a little show of it,

but like maybe just singing the song, but the biggest one I've ever seen is Hooters where they make you, where I went with Evan Susser, a friend of the podcast we mentioned earlier, and they give you like plates and you have to like flap your arms like a chicken and that's at Hooters and you kind of walk around the room. And it's funny and I was, when I go there with people and it is their birthday, I've only been with a couple people, but I will make it.

How many times have you been there? Just with Susser, my ex-girlfriend Danielle, I went to Hooters for both their birthdays. And did she like it? Yeah, she did. It was her choice actually. Oh, it was her birthday? Yeah.

And I've never just gone to Hooters on my own, but yeah, they make it kind of much around. It's a funny, fun show and it's fun and I like to embarrass people in that way. For myself, I do like, this is a sad thing as you get older, I do like to have people, it's a sad, this is a sad pathetic thing, but I do like to have a little piece of cake and people sing a happy birthday. It makes you feel good.

What can I say? I don't think that's sad or pathetic. It's very famous. That's fine. Okay. I don't have a strong opinion on this, so I'm just going to say, I think it's very nice. I feel like I've never actually really had it done to me ever.

I just realized this is going to sound really weird, but it doesn't feel like I've ever been given a little cake or I'm always, you know, was... Anyway, that sounds sadder than I mean it, but just never been in the restaurant to do that. We go to nice things for my birthday. Yeah, we go to nice little dinners for Arman's birthday and stuff like that.

The last couple of years I quit my birthday, but I'm sure I'll find it... You can see how people hate that, but anyway, for sure. I love dough boys. Love you guys. Bottom line is that I think that I also, for the last part of the question,

even though all the questions were done from this idiot from Brockton, I... I like the questions. I think it would be okay to get dessert. I think that's... If someone's getting cake or something like that, I think you can ask the table and say, should we get dessert?

And if people are into it and, you know, because he's going to finish that slice of cake pretty quick, and if other people are into it, then I'll get some dessert. But if no one is going to do it, I'll back up. Don't want to ever hold up a meal. The move I've seen is that some people will bring in like a sheet cake, like into the restaurant and have them bring that out as the birthday thing. And I was like, I've never done that,

but I think I've been at dinners where that has been done and I feel like that's a kind of interesting maneuver. I've also seen the thing. I was at one of my college roommates' ex-girlfriend's birthday party. She wanted to go to islands and we went to islands and she got as her birthday cake like one of those big chocolate lava things. She just said like, oh, that's what I want. And so that was a thing that was a little bit more shareable than a little cupcake.

And she paid for it, or the table paid for it. She didn't pay for it on her own birthday. But that worked out, I think. And they put a little candle in it. Yeah, yeah, they did it like that. So maybe that's another option. I like when a restaurant is prepared for that sort of thing. I remember when I was a boy, I went to McDonald's for my birthday one time

when I was a young boy. I think that's a pretty common kid thing. Yeah, when it was McDonald's birthday. It was kind of for Armin. I think maybe it was... I wasn't allowed that kind of stuff early on. We can talk about that next time. Okay.

Well, yeah, definitely. I think there's a lot more to explore, Armin. We'll have you back on here. We'll have you back. Anyways, my grimace came out and then all my friends just grimaced away and it kind of was a... Why? They didn't...

Why did they chase away? They were just Quincy kids. They were messing with them. Just want to kind of give that Brockton kid a heads up. No, just in Brockton, they would never. Yeah, they chased grimace away and it kind of was a sad moment. They're from the Monorail episode. See you guys.

What is going on? Armin just threw a Simpsons reference at us, but I don't know. But what is that? I know the Monorail episode. He says Brockton or something like it's one of the places he went to. Oh, no. North Ogdenville? Yeah.

Brockway? I think it's... Is it Brockway or Brockville? Yeah. I don't know. Well... North Haverbrook. North Haverville.

And I think it might be Brockway. Maybe it's Brockton. Listen, I just... I don't believe it's Brockton. I'm sorry. I love... This guy loves Bart Simpson. Someone will correct us.

Bart Simpson is another example. Someone that maybe was once a bad boy and seems to have been tamed down. Easy now. Like Mario. Oh, yeah. No, you worked at the Beatles of shows, of comedy shows. So, yeah, that's the greatest show there ever was. If the Beatles had never broken up and just kind of kept...

If the Beatles had followed the Rolling Stones model and kind of just kept playing and putting out albums for like the next 40 years. That's true. Yeah. All right. Which is a different alternate reality. Burger Boy. I like Burger Boy style.

I like that little wink you shot me on. That was cool. Jesus, YouTube. Do they explain why you're Spoon Man in another episode? I think if you listen to the Doe Boy's back catalog, you can get the etymology of Spoon Man. All right. I think on that note, let's fucking... Let's put an end.

Let's dunk this guy and let's dunk Armin in that vat of acid we were talking about and end this thing. Armin, thank you so much for being here. This has been a unique experience. A real treat. I don't think we'll do much deleting or editing here. I think this is going to be an episode that's going to go out intact. Like the Super Basketball Brothers podcast hopefully will someday.

So hopefully that will be one of those pilots that surfaces. Like that old Adam West pilot that just showed up on YouTube that people were enjoying. That's what it will be known as someday. Yeah. The Adam West detective pilot written by Conan O'Brien and Robert Smigel, the podcast. Yeah. Something like that. I don't know.

But Armin, thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much for bringing us your love of the Los Angeles Lakers and another LA institution in and out burger, which I think we gave it's proper regard today. Is there anything you would like to plug or promote other than another period on Comedy Central? No, I'd say live your dreams. And yeah, just don't worry about this podcast. Just when it's over, just don't worry about it and go about your day. Was that advice for us?

For the listeners. That's for the listeners. Okay. I think they were probably going to do that anyway, but maybe that's a nice thing to hear. Armin. A comforting bit of parting wisdom. Armin, you're one of my best buddies. Thank you for doing this.

You were great. You were great, Armin. We love having you here. Thank you. You're both very nice boys. Doughboys, in fact. Oh, God. Any of our listeners out there, before you take Armin's advice and go on with your day

as this podcast ends, keep in mind if you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can always email us at doughboyspodguest.com. Be sure to follow us on Twitter at DoughboysPod or check out our Facebook fan page, which is just Doughboys. That'll do it for this episode, where we covered In-N-Out Burger. Until next time, for The Spoonman and Mike Mitchell, I'm Nick Weiger. Happy eating. See ya.

Serial audio.