Doughboys - Insomnia Cookies with Mary Sohn

Episode Date: September 30, 2021

Mary Sohn (A.P. Bio, Work In Progress) joins the 'boys to discuss quarantine snacks and favorite fast food orders before a review of Insomnia Cookies. Plus, another edition of A Single Item Must Be Banished.  Sources for this week's intro: https://drugpolicy.org/blog/how-did-marijuana-become-illegal-first-place https://www.halt.org/history-marijuana-legalization-california/ https://www.cnbc.com/2015/10/09/insomnia-cookies-caters-to-late-night-munchies.html https://www.restaurantnews.com/insomnia-cookies-celebrates-the-opening-of-its-200th-location-062421/ https://franchisesamerica.com/franchise/insomnia-cookies-4118 https://admin.insomniacookies.com/aboutWant more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What's up, everybody? It's your boy, The Spoon Man, and I want to talk to you about today's sponsor, Uber Eats. At Uber Eats, we've helped more than 400,000 restaurants across the U.S. reach new, hungry customers and deliver growth quickly through new orders. Uber's global platform can help you grow, reach new people, get valuable sales data, and unlock ways to expand with flexible delivery options. Put your business on Uber Eats. Get access to the Uber Eats platform, including valuable sales data to grow your business. Dig into your data. Really dig in there, anytime, to monitor your performance and customer order trends. Wow. Wow.

Why, restaurant owners, enjoy 0% commission for the first 30 days on all orders, offer subject to change per the terms of the restaurant agreement. Wow, 0% on the first 30 days. Sign up today. That link that you want to click on is down there in the episode description. Right down there. Check it out. There it is. Move your cursor. Go ahead and click. Or if you're on your phone, use your finger and click that link. Click that link in the episode description. What's up, everybody? It's your boy, Mr. Slice, and I got some exciting news. The Doughboys are going back on tour in 2022. That's right. CS Live in Seattle, January 8th. Portland,

January 9th. At the Foxwoods Resort in Connecticut, February 4th. In Boston at the Wilbur Theater on February 5th. And guess what? Two new shows have just been added. One in Milwaukee on January 28th and one in Chicago on January 29th. Ticket info at headgum.com slash live. That's headgum.com slash live. See you there, baby. As California goes, so goes the country. It's unclear who first originated this adage, explaining how the Golden State's political trends tend to go national. Whether those be regressive, like Reaganism and immigration crackdowns, or progressive, like environmental regulations or gay rights. And in 1996, the state, which contains one eighth of America's

population and comprises the world's fifth largest economy on its own, became the first to legalize medical marijuana. Soon other states decriminalized or fully legalized wacky tobacco for medical and recreational use. And today, though the drug remains criminal at the federal level, California marijuana dispensaries are nearly as common as liquor stores. And with the increasing permissiveness toward marijuana consumption comes that waistline expanding side effect, the munchies. In 2003, enterprising college student Seth Berkowitz started baking and selling cookies out of his dorm room at the University of Pennsylvania, purposefully offering late night delivery to purvey its baked goods to baked customers.

By 2006, Berkowitz had opened a physical location outside of Syracuse, and the plan of targeting college campuses with late night offerings allowed the chain to grow to dozens of locations within a decade. In 2018, the upstart brand was purchased by Krispy Kreme's parent company JAB Holding, which also owns Panera, Einstein Brothers, and Kurig, which merged with Dr. Pepper. And so this formerly one dorm room operation is now part of a global megalith, though it does still operate independently. And also in 2018, the Pennsylvania founded cookie chain expanded to the left coast, opening its first of now a half dozen California locations. Will this merchant of munchies thrive out west? That very well may determine its fate.

For as they say, as California goes, so goes the country. This week on Doe Boys, Insomnia Cookies. Welcome to Doe Boys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Nick Weiger, along with my co-host, Mac and Cheese Jones, the Spoon Man, Mike Bichel. Low Patriots themed roast there. That was from Tom DeFredes, who writes, this roast sucks, but so do the Patriots. Yeah, this roast sucks, but so do the Patriots. Where's this guy from? I don't know. I'm coming for you. I'm gonna kick your ass wherever you're from. I'm gonna find you. I'm gonna kick your ass. You don't need to go get your ass kicked by this guy.

But hey, if you're listening out there. Wait, you're saying I'm gonna go there and get my ass kicked? Yeah, what do you think is going to happen? Everyone listening out there, roastspoonmanatgmail.com, and next month is the spookiest of months, October, send in your spooky Mitch roasts. Scary roasts all month long, roastspoonmanatgmail.com. Let me guess, they call me a fucking jack-o'-lantern head or some bullshit. Oh, that's pumpkin man. Hey, how's pumpkin man or some bullshit? You know what? Don't send them in. If you send in pumpkin man, I will use it on the show. So that's just a guaranteed in... Whoever gets into the inbox first. Pumpkin man, that was an old story up in Ithaca. There was a pumpkin man who ran through the woods. Old pumpkin man.

Are you sure it wasn't a David S. Pumpkins? Oh, I wish I could remember his fucking catchphrase. I think it was any questions. Any questions? Yeah, that's what it is. You know what, David? Oh my god, the doorbell's working again, and that's what that sound was. I don't know if you heard it. We didn't hear it. We're talking about David S. Pumpkins. You physically recoiled. I mean, a big loud blare after the big loud honking sound after we're talking about David S. Pumpkins. I feel like he's here, Wigs. Oh man, be careful. There was a David S. Pumpkins Halloween special too, right? Yeah, they made an animated short, a whole mini franchise out of it.

Wow. Bring them back. Bring back David S. Pumpkins. Wigs, how you doing? I'm doing well. Now, Mitch, you texted me rather cryptically before the show, and I don't know if this is going to happen or not, but we can say it anyway, that I had a surprise for you today. Is that still true? Do you have a surprise for me, or is that going to be on the back burner for now? In a way, yeah, it seems it's, you look at that text quickly, you think it could be a message from Jigsaw or something, but it's for me, your friend, Mitch. I have a surprise for you today. Great, I am ready. Let me dig this key out of my stomach.

Jigsaw has that surprise for you, and you've already taken the key out of your stomach. What the fuck? I felt something in there, buddy. Took it out. Jigsaw gone now. Now it's spiraled from the book of saw. Chris Rock, did you watch it yet? I watched it. I didn't. Did you like it? It's not the best saw, but I mean, what is the best saw? I guess you could also ask. Yeah, with those horror franchises, it's kind of almost like more is more. It's like, they just kind of keep making them, and whether it's good or bad, it's just like,

well, I'm glad they just keep going with these, because sometimes they'll come out with one, and it'll be like, what was it? The second Ouija movie, everyone was like, the second Ouija movie is awesome. Yeah, people like the second Ouija movies. The second Ouija is good. You know what I think they need to make more sequels of? Pumpkin Man. Well, he's got an animated special, so. All right, how the hell, like I said, to Spoon Nation. And here is a little drop. I don't know, dough boys. Butter. Wow. Good answer. Good answer. I love beans. I want the butter. There's nothing better than butter.

Butter is the best ingredient. What is better than butter? Different kinds of beans. Wow. How do you rank your beans? Fronter beans, brown beans, kidney beans, baked beans, refried beans, cheese, and real bean head. I want the butter. I want the butter. Butter. It's like butter, baby. It's like butter. I'm a huge bean fan myself. It's like butter. Butter. Good answer. Butter. I want the butter. Is it just me or did that drop make us seem kind of cool? Was that the surprise? No, what the fuck? You thought a drop was a surprise? I don't know. Hey, this is my first drop, sampling this, the song Butter by a tribe called Quest.

Sincerely hope you enjoy it. I had fun making it. Start up to my band, Team Vom, All My Love, Yock. I think it, hold on, I can't read. Yeah, Yock. Y-O-K. That's a cool name. Team Vom. Very cool. Like Team Vomit. I hope not. Doesn't Vom mean Vomit? It can, but not to say, it could be like, it could be an acronym, V-O-M, good stand for something. I feel like that's like, I feel like, God, I'm going to sound like an 80s standup, but I was going to be like, it sounds like a lady in the club saying Vom, you know what I mean? It sounds like a young woman says Vom. Right. Yes. I guess it's about to sign off.

What I always love about our guest is that she always seems the closest to be ready to just bail at any minute. Like, it always feels like she's just ready to leave the podcast. And normally we've been in person, so that's been a little bit awkward, but maybe today actually happens. Maybe she shuts off her webcam. We're done. Oh, shit. Vom, isn't that the, isn't that, isn't that shorthand? I think I've heard it at Vom as short for Vom. You know what, let's get our guest in here and we can litigate this and talk about this week's chain. Very, very excited to have her back. An actor and comedian from AP Bio and work in progress, Mary Sohn is here. Hi, Mary. Hi there. And I just want to say, as a young woman in the club,

we are always yelling cool things like Vom. And like, what's that an acronym for? All of us young ladies in the club are always saying this. Here's where I, this is, this is how I experience, I walk into the club, I say, hello ladies, and then all the ladies go Vom, they yell at me. Right. Vom. It's like, it's like the Steven Merchant, hello ladies. Like you're saying hello ladies, but they're not saying hi back. They're saying Vom. Deep cut, deep, funny show, a funny show. People know it. Steven Merchant show? Of course they do. Sure. You know what? Steven Merchant, he's a merchant of laughs. Oh boy. That's true.

There's that Vom behavior that we were talking about. If he was a merchant, he'd be, he'd be a merchant of laughs, Wikes. Right. Slinging chuckles at the bizarre. That's what I'm talking about. Mary, I'm curious about over the, we could talk about this nonsense all day, but let's get to business. I'm curious over this, this, the, you know, interminable period that was 2020 through, I guess through now, and obviously everyone's lives have changed. Like how has that affected your diet? Like have you been, have you been cooking more? Have you been getting more delivery? Like what have you been doing?

Oh boy. I would say even in that short period, I have gone through a real roller coaster. So out of the gate, I was one of those people at the grocery store that's like, I must get all canned foods. I must prepare to really hunker down. I would say I put on a sassy 10. I put on a sassy 10 right at the beginning of choir. And then I got myself a Peloton, trying to balance email. But I would say my candy addictive behavior really soared through the choir. Really interesting. What, what do you do candy wise? Um, well, I've been getting the family size packs just for me of peanut M&Ms. Also, I believe I've said on this pod before, I love a rips.

That's right. Yeah. Put those bad boys in the refrigerator for like an hour. Perfect. Um, and I also have gotten really into fruit rollups. Oh, wow. I love, I mean, I love fruit rollups. I love, I also love like the, the Trader Joe's like, like fruit strips, you know how they have like those little fruit strips. Those are pretty good too. Yeah. Yeah. The texture's like a fruit leather. Yeah. You know, you're right. I got some Trader Joe's, they're equivalent of this, the Flamin' Hot Cheetos. And they were like baked. And I was like, these, I just want Flamin' Hot Cheetos. Like I get that these are their attempt at that. And this is probably marginally

healthier. But at this point, what am I doing? And so I'm not a fruit leather person, but I think I would, I would probably opt for the real thing over the Trader Joe's equivalent. Mary, I believe that, I believe that you're saying Vom in the club because you similarly said CORE, which I thought was cool. Very cool. Do you like that? I've also been working out TEEN. Game so great over the TEEN. Yikes loves that one. Easy, easy. Oh, the ladies in the club do not like that one. I get Vom's, I get a Vom reaction from that. I know I would. How's everyone doing with TEEN? They get a Vom when I walked in. Why would say that? And then they'd actually Vom it.

That would be the, that would be the comment. What about you guys, what was your go to CORE snacks? Wow. Thank you for asking. I, you know, boy, I have, like you, just got a roller coaster. You know, I recently kind of hit my heaviest I've been in a while. And then I, you know, I've been slightly recovering from that. 90% of that weight isn't that tank ass of yours, by the way. So I, you know, I, like I was, I like you, I got the Peloton and I was using the Peloton a lot in, like I got it this year and I'll be using it a lot this year. And then I kind of like my gym reopened and everyone's masked up. And so I've been going to the gym more and doing

less of the, the Peloton, but either way, exercise I found from being so inert for so much of the year outside of walking for basically all 2020, I was basically just walking for exercise. Now I've got the Peloton and I'm going to the gym. I like gained weight because I was just eating so much to compensate for all the calories I was burning. So it was totally like, yeah, I was just, and also I felt like I'd earned garbage. So I was eating so much trash. Big sire relief from your Peloton seat, huh? Okay. And the ladies are back. They liked it. Yeah. Mitch, what were you snacking on over quarantine?

Wise, you know what's funny with me? Because as a man, a big man who is bigger than you and still throws fat jokes your way, I am not a big snacker. I don't, I don't, I don't snack. You know what, Mitch? I kind of am with you. I'm kind of more teen meal. Like I will have a snack, but it will be usually kind of modest unless, although I will do the late night, you know, I will do the late night just like having a bunch of food, like, you know, before I go to bed, which is really, really like, it's like the worst fucking possible time to eat a bunch of garbage. And that's when I'm most likely to do it. Like that, that flamingo cheat, I had the whole bag at like 1130 and then went to bed. That, that was, I mean, that, that is, that's my issue is that

like instead of a snack, I'll have like two cheeseburger meal for McDonald's, which is, right. It's like a meal, you know, it's a meal. You can't be doing that. Feel like a snack to me though. That's another thing too. I feel like lately I've been doing the old like, it's farm and, you know, exercise and stuff. Maybe I'll just pop by the old Mac, McDonald's and get myself a devil's breakfast. And cool. No one can tell me it's not good. I understand it's all processed trash, but no one can tell me it doesn't taste good. McDonald's is always, it always scratches the itch. It is. I've been eating vegetarian this year, so I've had a lot less of it, but I, but I always love it. I, uh, I was thinking this last

night, just that like, Bourdain would be like, every time I come in, not rest in peace to Anthony Bourdain, but he'd be like, every time I come into Los Angeles, like I'm going in and out burger and like so many people were like, my first stop in Los Angeles is in an out burger. And I'm like, McDonald's is better than in an out burger. It is. It just is better. I got McDonald's last night. I got a two cheeseburger. I actually got two double cheeseburger meal. That's not a meal. I just got that. I made it a meal. I got fries and a drink and a two cheese double cheeseburger meal. But in an out burger, just McDonald's is better. I know you love in an out burger, but McDonald's is better. I mean, it's just we're so accustomed to McDonald's.

But also I will say that even if you prefer McDonald's in an out burger, which is honestly a fine opinion, I like, I that that's totally fine, but you can get McDonald's anywhere. And if you, if you're in an out burger is like, it's just clustered in a few Western States. And even there, there's like two in Colorado. And you know, I think anytime they've tried to expand to Texas, they've like, it's not really work because everyone loves their water burger there. But it's, if you're in California, there's, there's a, there's a great in and out and it's right by LAX. Yeah. But McDonald's is just the, it's the king. It's the king for a reason. It's the best. I love McDonald's. Look, I'm not going to, I'm not going to say that McDonald's is bad

to prove some point. I love McDonald's. It's great. Mary, what do you, what's your go-to at McDonald's? Cause I know you're a fan. Much like Mitch, I love a double cheeseburger. For a while there, when I was still back in Chicago, I loved a Filet-O-Fish. I'm a little bit off of it now. Yeah. There's a lot of, my friend Greg and Quincy, Shieldsy, Wags, he, cousin Greg, he loves, he loves Filet-O-Fish. And there was a big talk about this. There's like die hard Filet-O-Fish fans. And I just never got started on the Filet-O-Fish really when I was younger. So it, so I never, and I, and I'm a fried fish fan, but what got you into it? Was it something that you had as a kid or is it like, like, how did you, how did you become a

fan of the Filet-O-Fish? I think it's probably cause I exhausted the rest of the menu so hard. I was like, I can't do it again. Let me, you know, let me go with the Filet-Fish option. Yeah, that's probably not healthy. But I do love that. Also, I like, I've, I like the chicken nuggets, but only if you can get the sweet and sour and also the hot mustard combo without those sauces. I'm not interested, but that's good. That hot mustard is great. Yeah. And it's, it's one that I hadn't used in a while. And I went back to it and I was like, damn, this is so good. I don't know this more often, but then also why am I getting McDonald's so much? That was, that was my, that was my, because I got my meals delivered. I was doing

like a healthy meal delivery during quarantine. So it just didn't stop. But I would have like a day off. Like my Sundays, it was six days, so I'd have a day off. And that was my cheat day. And I would, and this was what I would do in my cheat day. I would get a meatball sub from all about the bread in the afternoon. Let's go. And it was, it was fucking, it's so good. It really is great with a side of marinara sauce. And then I got the Hawaiian luau barbecue chips and a, and a Mexican Coca-Cola. And then I would get for dinner. So this is like all this dieting through the week was just destroyed on this day. This is what I would get for dinner. I get a number six from Wendy's Large with a Coke and a Dave single with cheese. That would be so that that's that, that was my,

that was my cheat day. It was, it was, it was quite the cheat day, but it was also like the only thing that was keeping me happy in, in teen. Right. The only thing in teen. Let me tell you some of my teen favorites. Dude, what's the number six? Sorry. Yeah. Is that the spicy chicken at the same question? Spicy chicken. Yep. Spicy chicken meal. I love the spicy chicken sandwich at Wendy's. It's so good. It's, it's, it's fantastic. But why is they changed their fries? Do you know about this Mary? Wendy's has changed their fries and I've had the fries and I don't think that they're good.

I think it was a bad change. They've like, they've like changed their fries for the first, for the second time ever. They've changed their fries. There was one change. Now, like what was it seven years ago or eight years ago? It was a while back now. It could even be 10 years ago, but they changed their fries to add like little, like they have like little potato skin on there, which I don't need. I don't need the potato skin. I don't need it. Yeah. Why do you add the potato skin? You don't dip potato skin in ketchup. You dip the fry, the golden baked fry into ketchup. You don't dip the skin. Get the skin out of here. Also, what's the new? And then, so the new one is like,

like a crispier texture because so many people are getting Wendy's to go. Like this is the thing with like all fast food places that are, they're like, like the new thing is, is that like people really get takeout and it's like, yeah, no shit. But like, what is that? And they're like, we want our fries to travel better and that we want them to stay crispy or longer. So for me, this just feels like, oh, so like this is just a chemical equation that you're adding to these fries to make them stay crispy longer. And it's, they remind me of the Burger King fries. Remember when Burger King got like the, like the breaded fries, it tastes like that. It feels like they're like a little bit more breaded. I don't, I didn't like them. I don't like them. It's a bad move by

Wendy's. And the idea behind this is just to keep them crispy longer. Like what you're saying, like in transit, like if they're being delivered or, you know, taken home to go. Is that what you're saying? Yes. Dave Thomas is rolling around in his grave. It's, it's bullshit. Yeah. Wendy's, Wendy herself is rolling around in her bed. I don't know. What, I don't know. What's the equivalent when you're alive? Yeah, she's bedridden. Yeah. Yeah. She's very unwell. Thank you for that, too much. Wendy's ironically, which can I also say that's exactly my order. For some reason, as an adult, it's just not enough to get that sandwich meal. There has to be an additional something. Oh yeah. Do you need a little sidekick, a little sidecar? You need, you need, you need,

you need someone like a, like a, what's, what's, what's the movie where they ride with, where they ride hogs, wigs? Wild hogs? Oh no. Is that what you're thinking of? I'm talking bike hogs too, by the way. That's what there is. There is a, there is a hogs movie, Wild Hogs. There is, there is, no, it's Nicholson. Nicholson in an easy rider, easy rider with a, what's his name? You need a duo. You need, yeah. Hopper. You need, you need a hopper. Hopper. Hopper tier. You need a hopper side. You need a Nicholson to your hopper. You need one. You need it on the side as an adult, just a regular meal. I'm with you. That's why, that's why I do think the two cheeseburger meal for McDonald's is great, but the cheeseburger just as an adult is not satisfying enough. One

cheeseburger is not enough. No. Well, it's also there. No, two cheeseburgers feels too small to me, really. I'm with you, but there's a reason like two cheeseburgers is like a default meal is because obviously one cheeseburger is just never going to be enough, but I'm with you. It's like, like, because your alternative is what? To like go large on your fries and drink. You might be doing that anyway, but then you start, but then I'm almost like, that's just empty calories. I almost feel like it's even, this is me rationalizing it, but I almost feel like it's even like a better just nutritional choice to just having an extra sandwich versus having like the, the, the, the hugest fries and drink you could have. Or like, what else? Like, yeah, you could, I've

done that before. I've gotten like a whopper and I've gotten like their mozzarella sticks on the side. And I'm just like, there's no way this is healthier than just getting like an extra burger. There's just no way this is at minimum calorically equivalent. Wait, and I got to know what your McDonald's order is. Nick. Well, so I'm a single vegetarian this year. Yeah, one cheeseburger. Dry. A cup of water. Yeah. But why is that water even good for McDonald's? It's so good. I do like their water. I tend to lean a team Big Mac. I'm usually big, like a Big Mac guy. And if I'm going to get like, I'll get like a four piece nuggets on the side or something, if I'm going to have a little supplement. But I, you know, I was messing with that two cheeseburger

meal for a while. I'm really into the just like the straight up double cheeseburger, like, like, and I'll get a couple double cheeseburgers. It's just like the best, like, you know, comb, like, I feel like that's like its perfect form where it's got the two slices of cheese in the two patties. The McDouble needs that extra cheese. And then the also I'll go double quarter pounder with cheese sometimes. I also think like that's just like a really good double burger. And that one is really filling. You usually don't need a supplemental sandwich. Well, these motherfuckers back in the 60s fucking rolling up to McDonald's and ordering single cheeseburgers to for their meals. Incense peppermint. Can I get a single cheeseburger?

That's fucking bullshit. Wags. Give me one cheeseburger. I'm going to go chant about LBJ. And also to like think about how much they were drinking back then. I'm like, one single burger is going to soak up all that gin. I don't think so. Yeah, I don't I don't get it. Wags and then those people, they get to the place where they're chanting about LBJ and it's show us jumbo show us jumbo. Is that the name of this hog? Yeah, isn't that his hog's name? I thought you would like that. I did like it. It just took me a second because we were talking about portion sizes.

So I was thinking like, do they want like a larger portion is like, Oh, okay. No, you're talking about LBJ's famously huge penis that he nicknamed jumbo. That was their chance. But had a huge hog. Yeah. So he's so he's forgiven in your book, correct? Did he kill JFK? Is that a conspiracy theory? Isn't it that he got JFK killed? You don't know this? Oh, well, no, I mean, I've always heard like versions of I guess the versions I've heard

have always been like, like, you know, used to implicate the KGB or the deep state or Cuba. I guess like the LBJ connection I've seen less explored, but I'm sure that's a theory. If LBJ got JFK killed, I'd be so mad at him right now. LBJ, don't. Don't do that. What are you doing? What's your, what's the deal? Take a look at this here. Whoa. Oh, he's forgiven. I think JFK just saw it and his mind was blown. I think that's what happened. That's my that's that's my conspiracy.

Hey, Mary. So you were talking candy earlier and, you know, I can, I can infer that you have a bit of a sweet tooth. I'm curious about cookies specifically. Are you, are you a cookie monster? I am a bit of a cookie monster. I used to work at the bubblegum shrimp company, where one of our best selling desserts was a skillet cookie with two scoops of ice cream, nuts, whipped cream. And I'm not going to lie. I would eat the ones that came out a little too burnt, a little under. And so again, Mary, this is, I was just in a movie, The Tomorrow War, and in my co-star, he was, I was his co-star. He was the lead of the movie. Chris Pratt worked at Bubba Gump. And he was saying the same exact, he was saying the same exact thing. He would,

he would mix up orders or get them wrong so that he could, so that he could, he could eat whatever that people didn't eat. But that's, this, this, this must be a thing that goes on at Bubba Gump shrimp company. This must be, this is the hustle that goes on. Yeah. Yeah. Oh man. I used to order so many sides of chowder. I really pulled one over with a cream made soup. Yeah. I will say though, I, I do have a bit of a sweet tooth. Yeah. Right. I got, I got a cookie, I got a cookie monster too. That was my favorite Sesame Street character for Wild Wigs. Yeah, he's great. I liked Grover a lot too, but cookie, I've just completely remembered. I, when you said, I haven't thought about

Cookie Monster in a while, he's great. That's kind of our dynamic. We kind of have a Grover Cookie Monster dynamic here on the podcast as you and I, let's go. Yeah. I'm happy you didn't call me Oscar. That's nice of you. I, I, I, I love, I love, I love, what am I going to say? I was going to say, I love Sesame Street. Is that what I'm about to say? I love for his prep. By the way, it's so funny that you say that because I remember day one at Bubblegum Shrimp Company, they, ooh, they love to claim him. They did something to help his career. Like, yeah, that's why he's in Guardians of the Galaxy because of Bubblegum Shrimp Company. The Parks and Rec people love the way he served Lieutenant Dan Stronk.

I'd love it if that was the new springboard. That was the new groundlings getting into a shifted Bubblegum Shrimp Company. If you work at Double, you will sign with UTA. That is how it goes. I know what I was going to say. I was going to say that I love a character that loves cookies, like Cookie Monster does. I think that's a great thing. Cookies, yeah, it was, it was funny. I mean, we're going to get it in today's episode, but cookies, not like a normal thing I snack on. I'm not a big snacker. And then when we did today's episode, I was like, oh yeah, cookies are great. Cookies are a lot of fun. A nice, warm cookie. How can you go wrong with a nice, warm cookie? It's just something that I don't, as an adult, I just never eat cookies too much. I'm a big,

I like Milano's. You know, you like, are you fans of those rocks? Oh yeah, that's great. You a fan? Okay. I'm Milano's. My grandma used to have the Milano's. What are the ones that have, oh God, I can't remember. The chocolate in the middle and the two wafers on the outside. Oh wait, those are Milano's, right? There's also Milano's. Okay. All right. All right. Yes. That is just a Milano. Okay. It's Pepperidge Farms Milano's. Remember what a Milano is? Pepperidge Farm remembers. Mitch doesn't. Any questions? Wow. David S. Pumpkins is the Pepperidge Farm guy. Who knew you? The whole animated thing. It's incredible. Nick, are you a Pepperidge Farm guy?

Yeah, I do like, we did like, I did like Pepperidge Farms, you know, the, specifically the orange Milano's we would have. Like it has a little hint of citrus to them. I don't like any, don't get the flavor on it. I like chocolate or double chocolate. The double dark chocolate. That's, I think that's my favorite. So I'm even more fancy boy. They're all good. I even like the mint ones. But you know, here's the thing I'll say about cookies. Because so many of my favorite cookies are like, you know, just ones my grandma baked. My grandma was a great baker. But the, yeah, right. I can't buy it. I'm peeing my dead grandma. She was a great... Oh, I didn't know she had passed. And you know what?

I'm mad about it. Thanks. It's fucking bullshit. Thank you. This is bullshit. So, but like, like, cookie, here's the thing about cookies is they're good, like, they're good fresh baked, but they're also good packaged. Like I like like Oreos. I like like Chippahoy's. I like the, I like the Pepperidge Farm family. I like, I like packaged cookies as well. An eel fudge. Give me an eel fudge. You love to say it the right way. You love to say not chips. You say Chippahoy, which is right, right? That is the correct way to do it. For me, it would always say, grandmother, please fetch me double chocolate Milano's,

please. That's what I would say to my grandma. Right. Yeah, my little bell. I'd ring my little bell. I do have to ask, have you guys tried the Chessmen from Pepperidge Farm? Yes. Yeah. You dip that into a little coffee, hog and dyes ice cream. That's a little slice of pepper in there, boys. You'll love that. I didn't think about that. It's very nice.

The verve pipe should write a song about me and Weigar. We were nearly Chessmen, right? We'll take a break. We'll be back with more doggies. No. You know, Mitch, you're about to take a little trip abroad. You're going to Costa Rica. That's right. Why? So I'm going to Costa Rica with the family. It's going to be a lot of fun. Going to maybe see a monkey. Oh, that's fun. Going to maybe see a bird. Just that. Just a one monkey, one bird. That's it. Hey, that sounds like a heck of a vacay. And you know what?

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for our production sites and offices, and feature sustainably sourced seafood in our meals. Head to factormeals.com slash doughboys50 and use code DOBOYS50 to get 50% off your first box. That's code DOBOYS50 at factormeals.com slash DOBOYS50 to get 50% off your first box. Do it. Welcome back to DOBOYS. We are here with our guest, Mary Sohn, discussing this week's chain, insomnia cookies. Insomnia cookies founded in 2003 by University of Pennsylvania student Seth Berkowitz. Mitch, like last week's chain, Charlie's Philly Steaks,

another chain started by a college student while in school. So there you go. Wow. 200 locations. I mean, so many of these places, like Domino's, like we've talked about before, started right off a college campus. Yes. To basically catering to college kids.

Yeah. That's absolutely this place's strategy. Of its 200 locations, most are clustered near college campuses. It was acquired by the parent company of Krispy Kreme in 2018, so same corporate ownership. Interesting. The name insomnia is because most of its stores are open until 3 a.m. to cater to that studying crowd or perhaps that inebriated crowd that tends to be at colleges. I had anyone had insomnia cookies before because I know this was a chain that was like kind of,

you know, it's been around since the early 2000s, but it really kind of came on the scene in the 2010s and it really only recently expanded to California. So I was aware of it, but I'd never had it before this experience. I'd never had it either. I'd never even heard of it. Wow. I had it just because why is we, for the doathon, we, people who helped out with the doathon, we gave guests some insomnia cookies.

So, and I included my mom in that list and then I ate all of them. Wait, you got, you bought with our company card cookies for your mom and then eat them? Yeah, put it together. I said it was a gift. This is you figuring, this is like my little jigsaw situation, you just figured it out. Okay. Also, I'm riding a tricycle right now for people who can't see. I got my mom insomnia cookies.

Emma knows this. It was a little secret thing that Emma and I did on the side. Don't you worry about it, Wags. It's all good. I'm not worried about it, it's fine. And so I had them and I enjoyed them quite a bit, but Wags, I'll tell you this much. I actually went to a location for this episode. I went to an actual location up in Harvard.

I was at Harvard, Harvard as they say. Wow, there you go. I walked through the halls of Harvard and there was a very simple math equation on a white board. And I put down an answer to it. And it was wrong? It was wrong. Professor was like, this is really easy. Whichever student got this wrong needs to be expelled.

So I was up in Harvard. I similarly went to a physical location. Wow. Their whole thing is that they offer delivery and they ship nationwide for one or they offer local delivery. I was outside of the delivery area, so I went to the location. But their whole thing is they're meant to be like, hey, we'll bring you cookies to your door at in the middle of the night.

I think that's a big part of their marketing. And they have a new location that's not open yet, but that is soon to open in Westwood Village, which is just south of UCLA campus. So another college attempted targeting a university. But yeah, I ordered with the app and went to pick up. Mary, how about you? How did you get your cookies? Yeah, I read on Yelp some reviews just saying, oh, I got there and they didn't have the

sort of kinds that I wanted. So like an absolute psychopath. I woke up and that's the first place I went to. I was probably their first customer. So like a deranged person, I did wait outside till the doors open. Wow. Thank you. Yeah.

Because also too, I had to taste, I know a big part of it is that they are warmed, that they're very like warm cookies. So they're very warm cookies. Cool. Yeah, just so I really wanted to get the full experience. Wow. I think that's great. I mean, I think there is a thing with this place where they make cookies and then keep them

like in like a heating tray. So to get a fresh batch, I mean, it is also funny to be the first person to add insomnia cookies. A place that probably doesn't exist. I mean, I slept there all night. I'm sorry. Yeah, because they open like earlier than the cookie consumption hour, right? Like they open at like, you know, 10 a.m., 9 or 10 a.m. Do they really open it early?

Yeah, they open pretty early. I think probably because they're like, oh, well, just we're going to fulfill our app orders, you know, while things are slow. Oh, wait, there's someone here. A woman is haunting us from the grave. She is demanding way too many cookies for one person. Well, I appreciate you going above and beyond. I got way too many items as well.

I'm certainly all got way too many cookies because like everything looks good and it's pretty easy. Amount of money you're spending aside, obviously, but it's pretty easy to effectively order the entire menu because they have a lot of options, but it's not like they have like a hundred options, you know, they have like, you know, it doesn't change different cookies. So we got a bunch of them. I guess I guess let's just get into it. I'll start with this one because I have a feeling that one or both of you also got this

and I have thoughts on it and I'm curious about yours. But I mentioned I picked up from the West Hollywood location same one Mary went to, I believe the app, I think is really slick. I ordered for the app and then went and picked it up and it was ready right away. It's really well packaged to what I think is to its credit like it was very, very easy to tote all the way home. And the cookie that I met that I want to talk about first is the everything bagel cookie. I didn't get it.

Why? Because it wasn't it wasn't available. I'm sad. Mary, did you get it? You know I did. So I feel left out. God damn it. Mr. Harvard Yard.

The everything bagel cookie has poppy seeds and onions in a cookie. So it's like everything remind everything bagel, including poppy seeds and onions. And then I got mine with the I got the everything bagel big dipper box, which comes with a cream cheese icing that is sweet. And then a savory everything seasoning topping on top of that. And this was a wild experience. Like this was not I expected it to be like an everything cookie, but like the for instance, there's a place in LA called Cookie Good and they have a Cheetos cookie.

And you get the Cheetos cookie and it like it looks Cheeto-y, but and it's got like a Cheetos flavor, but it's also very sweet. Like it's clearly cookie. Sounds like I named that place Cookie Good. That's what I wrote on the whiteboard at Harvard, by the way, beneath the math equation. Is there a Frankenstein on campus? But my point is that that sounds like it could be savory, but it tastes like a cookie. This is not necessarily sweet at all.

At least mine wasn't. I don't know what did you think, Mary? Yeah. I mean, I was intrigued and it's funny because the guy was like, and I'll pack this one separately because and then he just got to stop talking. And I remember opening it and it just was like, oh, the stinks. Yes. You said it's been a ride.

I feel the same way. Like a bit like the girl who tries kombucha the whole like, oh, that thing. I took a bite and I was like, I did not get it with the cream cheese. And I wanted to ask you about that. I took a bite and at first I was like, oh, God, this is terrible. And then I think my brain was doing the sort of like mental math of, oh, this is kind of like as if a cornbread was in disc form. And it was a bit of like a sweeter like side.

So it tasted like one of those like little rolls you get from a Midwestern restaurant. But yeah, I went from really hating it to being like, okay, this is okay. Wow. I had the same feeling and Natalie felt the same way. It was just kind of like a weird like ride to consume this where it's, I don't know. It's like, it doesn't taste like a cookie. And because it looks like a cookie, your cornbread is a really good comparison. Because it looks like a cookie, you have your expectations.

I almost said baked in expectations. That seemed like too much of a pun. So I bailed. Was it meant to be a pun? It wasn't meant to be. That's why I was like, I was like, oh, you have your expectations baked in. And I was like, but if I say that about a cookie, people are think I'm trying to be cute. And I wasn't.

So I didn't say it. And I think it was the right decision. But I still am like, I think I would have this. I should have, you know, I should have just done it this morning. Because we have a couple left over. I was like, I think I would have this in the morning with a cup of coffee. It's kind of like a weird like, it's just a weird breakfast cookie. And regarding the the schmere that you mentioned, I think it kind of helps it.

I mean, the cream cheese icing is disarmingly sweet. So it definitely makes it a lot more desserty. But then the everything seasoning, the extra toppings with it gives it a nice little texture. I don't know. I'm confused, but I think I liked it. I think that's my overall assessment of this one. But let's get into some other cookies. Mitch, start giving a rundown of what you got.

You guys kind of, it's a breakdown of what people think of dough boys. Mary with your, it stinks and then confused, but I think I like it. It's kind of the two reactions to dough boys. Or Weigher and I when we're coming into the club. So Weig's, I went to, like I said, I went to the one next to in Harvard. And I walk in and I walk in like, so mine closed at 1am. It was a Sunday night. And I walked in and this guy, Mike, who was working there,

he was talking and they were having a good time. And I said, what's up? And I told him my deal. And I said, I'm going to say, I'm going to be honest with you because we were just talking. We were just chatting. And I said, I'm going to be honest with you. I'm on a podcast when we're reviewing this place. It's like, I never do this, but I was like, what do you think is good?

And they all started laughing. And he was like, well, what I think is good. And he started to list off all these vegan cookies. So I had asked a person who was a vegan, a vegan, a guy who was a vegan who worked there, what his favorite cookies were. Also, my friend Alex told me that I should get some vegan cookies from here. So I did. I got the chocolate chunk vegan cookie.

It's vegan and gluten free. And it was really good. I was shocked. I was really shocked by it. I also got... So in that same box, they gave me the milk in cereal cookie. Do you know this one, Wags? Yes, I got that one.

And I wasn't sure if this one was gluten free, but this one was just straight up not good. It tasted very marshmallow-y. This was the only one I did not like to be clear. This is the only one I didn't like. Was this... Yeah. I'm looking at the menu now to see if there is a gluten free varietal of this, but I will say that the cereal and milk one, which I got, there is a vegan birthday cake.

It doesn't look like there's a vegan cereal and milk. But the regular cereal and milk I got, I similarly thought was too marshmallow-y. And also, the cereal within it is fruity pebbles. But it's very fruity pebbly. So it's a weird thing where it's kind of a generic cookie base, but then you're getting a lot of fruit flavor and then also just a lot of marshmallow in each bite. I just found it kind of unpleasant. I'm sure some people would like that shit, but not for me.

Yeah, no, it wasn't really for me either. That was kind of my only letdown, though, I will say, because I thought the rest of my cookies were pretty fantastic. They told me right away that they were out of sugar cookies, and they were also out of snickerdoodles. So two big ones, not available. But that was okay. So I got some, I got double chocolate mint.

I got one of those. I got the classic with M&Ms. I got, let me look here, sorry. Then I got a couple of the big, because they have like two, they have like two scales. They have the deluxe cookies and non-deluxe cookies. So I got a few deluxe cookies. I got a chocolate peanut butter cup, a confetti deluxe,

a salted caramel. And then I also got myself a witch, Wigs. Not W-I-T-C-H. Yes. W-I-C-H-E-S. I got one of the witches. Hold on, let's back it up. Can you take that again and just say, I also got a witch?

I also got a witch. Wigs, W-I-C-H-E. Oh, okay. We're talking about Frankensteins and witches. It really, October really is coming, Wigs. That's right. So I got, so with the witch, I got myself W-I-C-H-E, Wigs. I got myself a triple chocolate, a triple chocolate,

and then the confetti deluxe. And as the ice cream, I got this weird ice cream that I still don't really know what it is. And I need your help. It's like a cookie dough. It's like a blue monster cookie dough. Did you see this in your shot? Let me look at the menu.

I didn't end up getting ice cream because it was enough of a drive for me back that I was like, this just isn't going to travel. But I guess I could have just gotten a scoop and eaten it there. I didn't think to do that. There's that bad boy right there. See it, Wigs?

Yeah, I'm looking it up. There's a gluten-free ice cream. There's a vegan chocolate. There's a gluten-free cookie with ice cream on it. I don't see all their ice cream flavors here. Well, Mike really hooked it up. I'm going to say the highlight. My bite of the night was this big monstrosity of a sandwich,

which we'll post online. It was really, really good. And the cookie was warm. Here's the deal. Here's what happened. They had made this up for me. They were being great. And Mike was hooking me up, putting the cookies in the box,

telling me what to get. And I said, I put in my credit card. I said, you can put a tip on the card, right? And he said, no, it's one of these places you can't put a tip on the card, which is so crazy. I had the same issue with the app. Yeah, it's frustrating. I had no cash.

And I said, is there an ATM nearby? He said, yes. And he said, right at the corner, there's a Bank of America, the Harvard Bank of America. So I went over to the Bank of America. And the doors were locked and none of my cards unlocked it. Like I went through every single one of my card and there were two doors.

So I had to come back and be like, I couldn't get money for a tip. Like I felt like such a failure because I was trying to... Because he was like, it's all good when I said I was going to go get him a tip. He's like, it's all good. Don't worry about it. And I was like, no, no, no, I'll go get you one.

Then I couldn't get you one. And then by the time I got back to the ice cream sandwich, it had melted quite a bit because I had been spending time trying to get a tip. So I fucked up so bad. I fucked up all over the place. Well, don't worry. We're going to get into the surprise in a second.

But that ice cream sandwich, that ice cream sandwich was really, really great. And I thought most of the deluxe cookies were really, were really good. There were like, here's my one complaint about this. And I wonder what you guys will think about this. I think that there was like one or two cookies that I thought tasted a little bit oily.

Not all of them, but there was like one or two where I was like, oh, I taste like kind of like, it tastes like they've been baked and I taste like kind of like the butter or oil sitting in them. Like that, that, that is the only complaint I had. And then my, my other small complaint was that I, this mint chocolate chunk, chocolate, chocolate chunk or whatever, it is so overpowering.

If you get it, you should ask for it in a separate bag because it makes some of the other cookies taste like mint. Wow. Yeah. Cookie Monster wouldn't be having any of it. Yeah, it's, it's, it's, it's, my mom loved it. My mom said that that was, because she tried one,

she said it was her favorite. The salted caramel was good. The, just the, the vegan chocolate chip one was good. And then that buttercup one was really great too. And I even, I liked the confetti one, but the highlight was that, that sandwich and a good M&M cookie. All the cookies were great. And I kind of got one over on like the appeal

and just even the, the hook of this restaurant. I was like, I kind of like this place. I like insomnia cookies. They do one or two things and they're trying to do them, you know, the best they can. I'll also just say real quick that I think that this, you getting two different cookies for your ice cream sandwich is anarchy. I cannot endorse this chaos.

That's insane. A confetti and a chocolate. It was great. It worked perfectly. Um, I, yeah, I, I, I cannot get on board with that, but Mary, let's get, let's talk about your cookies. Oh my God. What did you get there?

What'd you get there for Brighton Early from the, from the insomnia? Well, when I got off my cot, um, he opened the doors and I said, what do you want for a breakfast cookie? You know, I agree with you Mitch on the, um, greasy factor. Like I thought these were all really delicious, but I, as also I got a deluxe salted caramel as well. I felt like that one in particular, maybe it's because they're larger than the.

They're huge. Yeah. They're very big. Yeah. That may have held on to the butter a bit more. You know, I'm a classic gal and I love the chocolate chunk. I thought it was really delicious. Also, I really disagree.

I loved the cereal and milk cookie because yeah, because I think, um, it felt like, oh, this is a slight departure. It feels more like a rice crispy treat. It was very good to me. Oh, interesting. Yeah. I really, really liked the classic with M&M's too.

I thought that sometimes like a grocery store M&M cookie can really miss the mark. This one was very good. I got the vegan birthday cake. I thought the texture was a little strange. And then I got the cinnamon bun, which was, yeah, with the white chocolate, I believe is what it was with. The cinnamon factor of it was really delicious.

And then I got to say a little too sweet, I think on the icing part. Interesting. I mean, this is, I mean, I'm not, I don't have the biggest sweet tooth. And that for me is a big thing with cookies in general. Is that like, I'm not, you know, I'm not always going cookie crazy because I don't have

a crazy sweet tooth. I'm not a cookie monster. And that way I've grown out of the cookie monster thing. I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't need, I don't need the cookies anymore, Wags. If cookie monster ever grew up, if cookie monster aged, he'd be munching on hamburgers or something now. He'd be a cheeseburger monster.

He wouldn't stick around to cookies. You know, that's true. Well, I mean, he's been around for a while, but you're saying that because he's kind of like a Dracula, he just liked, he's been the same age for all of time that he hasn't, his palate hasn't matured. Halloween is really, it's the spookiest season as upon us. Dracula, Frankenstein, witches.

We got all, we got almost all of them. Yeah. I would say, I think you would switch over to something more savory at some point in time. It's just, but the idea of this of like a place that delivers, especially to college kids, the idea of like getting a box of cookies and a glass of milk so that, you know, you're, you know, you don't have mommy. You can't, your mommy's gone.

So you, you don't have mommy. So you need, you need a little box of cookies and milk. That's, I think it's sweet. I think it's kind of a nice idea. It's, it's good. Bringing back so many memories of my, my, my freshman year dorm roommates telling me that same thing, like mommy's gone. You don't have mommy.

I miss mommy's milk. That's what you were crying over and over again. I will say, yes, if this existed when I was, you know, I was an undergrad, yeah, I would absolutely have loved it. And I also think that there is, okay, so this will be, this will actually be interesting for the Westwood outlet because there is a local spot, a beloved neighborhood spot in Westwood, just south of UCLA campus where I went to school

called Diddy Reese and like Diddy Kong. And Diddy Reese has, it like, it, it has like basically these same quality cookies, but they're like half price. In fact, when I was in school, they were like, you get like three for a dollar. It was like, it was an absurd value. And so I think competing with a local spot like this might be tough, but they do have the value out of

they will deliver. And I think that will be, you know, that will definitely help it out. I didn't get to experience the delivery, but picking it up as you both did, I will say that, yeah, again, you can't tip on the app. I did the same thing as you, Mitch, I made a, had to make a trip to the ATM to drop a little cash tip,

which is just frustrating. Let us tip on the app, you know, or let us tip on the, on the card, you know, don't, don't create that obstacle. But especially when, when somebody's places are having trouble finding workers, it's just like, well, yeah, if you're not going to let people get tipped, it's like, why are they going to work there? But anyway, the, the, that aside, I will say that the

cookies I really, I really liked. You talked about the cinnamon bun, Mary, I looked it up. It's actually a, what they describe as dreamy cream cheese drops. So that it's like a cream cheese chips. Oh, that stinks. Creamy drops? No, no. Yeah.

It's a gross description. But I will say I did like my cinnamon bun. I thought it was quite good. I thought it was like a, it was, it was like a plus step snicker doodle. I thought this was a, I didn't get the snicker doodle and I didn't miss it because I thought this was just like a, a cooler version of it.

And I'll say that's my general note for anyone who goes to this place is the more dynamic and daring flavors are just more interesting. Like I agree, they have a good chocolate chunk. They have a, they have a very solid, very good peanut butter chip. But I was more interested in the, in the ones that were a little bit unique.

I also got a dark chocolate chunk, which was very good. The white chocolate macadamia, which was solid, says it was coconutty. I didn't get a lot of coconut from it. Cinnamon bun, I actually really liked cereal and melted it. It wasn't for me. But the deluxe cookies I got, which are a little bit

bigger and you know, then the normal cookies, you get six for 12, the deluxe you get four for 14. But they are bigger. So it's like the equivalent amount of food. And then just the flavors are more interesting. The salted caramel I thought was good. Yeah, I can maybe see that it was perhaps a little bit greasy.

You know, I didn't, I didn't quite hone in on that as I was eating it. But yeah, I can definitely see that the s'mores, I thought was a really good execution of that. I don't love s'mores personally. I just don't love the combo of marshmallow. You know, maybe I'm, I don't, maybe I'm a marshmallow skeptic.

Maybe that's part of the issue. But, but this was a really good execution of that having the graham cracker and the chocolate chunks integrated in there. The confetti deluxe. I don't know if either of you got the confetti deluxe. I apologize if you said you did. I love the confetti deluxe.

I thought it was good as well. I thought this was like, this was like a, just a better version of the similar cereal and milk. I just, I thought it was, it was a similar sort of flavors. But I thought it was just a, it was just really, really delicious. And then my, my munch of the lunch Mitch was the

oatmeal chocolate walnut. Wow. Which was a, which was an oatmeal cookie with, it was as simple as an oatmeal cookie with chocolate, with, with walnut and chocolate. It was so good. This was your lunch? Yeah, this was.

You had a cookie based lunch? Jesus. And a side double cheeseburger. No, this was, this was a, this was, there were a lot of cookies. Look, you're having bites of like 16 cookies. It's a lot of food. Cookie monster.

If he was, if he wasn't a Dracula, he'd be turning 53 this year. Wow. So he'd have gray hair. He wouldn't be blue anymore. Yeah. He maybe was at the, he maybe was at the Capitol. Instead of, instead of cookie, cookie, cookie.

C is for corruption. He's going to lock her up. Yeah. Benghazi ain't going away. Yeah, it's a, it's, I don't know. I really like this place. I think I'm, I think this is maybe the consensus. And I guess we should just get into our final

thoughts here, but I, like this place, it's, it's, it's a pretty streamlined concept. They're like, we're going to make cookies and we're going to have ice cream. I didn't try the ice cream. We should have tried the ice cream. But they are like, we're going to make cookies. We're going to have ice cream and we're going to

have it be, you know, we're going to be open late and it's, and it's going to be available for delivery. And that's what we do. And, you know, evaluating those terms, I don't know. I came, I came away pretty happy with my insomnia cookies experience, but we should get to our final thoughts.

So Mary, you've done the podcast before, but just to refresh her, we'll each go around, give our closing argument, if you will, on insomnia cookies and end that by giving it a score from zero to five forks. You are our guest. We'll begin with you. Thank you so much.

Boy, I really wish I would have remembered the really kind gentleman who helped me out as well. And I did have a cash chip on me because I am a grandma and I always got a loose five, but really like you're saying, I mean, I woke up, rubbed my eyes and walked in there and said, wow, straight out of the gate. First thing I want to put into my belly are six,

from the six pack, six classic cookies and a deluxe salted caramel. I think the outside was very crisp on each one of them soft and gooey on the inside. To me, I loved all the classic ones. I'm not, I'm not with Nick on this one. I liked sort of the classic variety and also I liked the general vibe.

I'm going to say five forks. Five forks. I love it. I love it. Not messing around. I love it. I love it. I mean, I'm in this.

I mean, I'm ballpark bud with you. I'm a ballpark bud here, but let me, let me get into it. Wags, I came, I came away with, I came away with a similar feelings that you did. I went in kind of not being a bit of a skeptic on this and I left being an insomnia fan. I like insomnia.

I think insomnia is good. And here's the surprise for you, Wags. When I was in there, I said, I do a podcast and I told you, I was, I was talking with, with Mike, basically the, the, you know, for, for most of the time that I, that I was in there, I was, I was talking with a, with a great guy, Mike, but also when I said I was, I was doing a podcast, another employee, his name

was Devon, his ears, he perked up at the, at the mention of a podcast and he said, do you do a podcast? And he said, I used to do stuff at the Hong Kong and in, in Cambridge there. And I said, Oh wow. And he told, he showed me what he did. He's like an emcee and he does like a, he does great.

He does like the trailer voice. He does like a great trailer voice. Wow. And so without further ado, I got his contact information and I had him do a little dough boys trailer and I'm going to share it with you right now. Here we go. In a world where there are many dumb podcasts,

there's one podcast that's dumber than them all. Dough boys, you started listening because you was interested to hear about the food. Then you wondered if Nick and Mitch would kill themselves. Now you don't know why you listen anymore. From Wendy's to Chick-fil-A to Taco Bell and Taco Bell and Taco Bell again. The boys will continue to do the work.

You don't even want them to do. And also talk about random guy hauls. God bless the dough boys and the important work that they do. P.S. Nick, you owe me $150. My cash app is big daddy. Yum yum, speechy, D-A-T-D-Y-Y-U-M-Y-U-N-C, dollar sign in front. And please send the money from your personal account, not the dough boys. Thank you, dough boy.

Wow. What pipes on Devon? Devon was, Devon had, he had amazing pipes. Put him on display. Emma, it worked. I'm shocked it worked. This was a whole, this was a full day affair of trying to get this to work. But Devon told me that he was like, watch what I do.

And he started talking like that. And I was like, hey, let me, let me, let me take advantage of this. I got his info and then, and we, and he did that basically this morning. He was great and everyone in there was great. Which you know what, Wags? Devon and Mike, you help push it up to a four and a half for, forks, not completely five forks, but very, but very, very, very close. I'm not going to give it, I'm going to go with my heart, but it's, it is, it's a great place.

And I think that it's, it's a fun chain. If you have it in your neighborhood, I feel like if I was having a party and there was a bunch of people over and like, I want to just get some warm cookies and milk for the end of the night, a nice little treat for dessert, I would 100% take advantage of this. And it's like a good, it's kind of like a good date spot Wags to walk to after, after dinner or something. It's just, it's great. They do what they do well, four and a half forks, nearly five forks.

It's great. Wow. Very good score. Uh, we should, we should verify whether Devon wants his cash app public. But if he's okay with it, that was, that was a part of it. Okay. If he's okay with it and anyone wants to, wants to tip a service worker and feel free to send him a couple bucks.

But, uh, and, uh, what, Mitch, you and I will talk offline about how we're gonna pay him because no, it's per, you heard Devon, it's a personal account. Okay. I think we could do it out of the dope ways account. No, you request a personal account. Okay. I think that was maybe your language. I don't think it needs to come from my checking account.

I think it may be come from the company's funds, but especially for tax purposes. But, uh, again, we'll talk about this offline. I will say that the, again, the app is great. The app's not crap. The app's great. The, the, the one worker there did a great job and had everything ready to go. You know, I didn't have a lot of repartee with him. That's more of Mitch's department.

But, um, but we, I think we had a nice interaction and, uh, and I think the service was great. And I will say that I like all the food. I like all the cookies. I, you know, there's a part of me that's like, I wish in my college years, instead of playing Smash Brothers Melee and Diablo two and, you know, like, like that was basically my college experience. I wish I'd like thought of an idea for a fucking million dollar chain restaurant out of my dorm room.

I wish I'd been that entrepreneurial because, you know, two weeks in a row, we're running into guys who just sort of like had the gumption to just sort of, and also got money from their families, but that's fine. But like, you know, had the gumption to just sort of like have this idea and start it up on their own and just sort of come up with this business and, and appeal to a niche that they knew existed because they understand the eating habits of their fellow coeds. And that's, that's very much the case here. Like I get the appeal.

I understand why this is working. I understand why this is expanding and why it's growing. And I think the cookies are pretty, pretty good, especially for the price. I think this is a decent value. Think of all the things you could have invented in your college years. The hula hoop. Okay. Two years older than you.

Let me go to school on the GI bill. I think it's an endorsement of this place that, you know, some of us are like, try, go more basic. I'm like, go more daring. I think there's a lot of varietals here that will, that will work for you. The, the nice thing is that you can try a bunch without breaking the bank. And so I think I'm, I think I'm, I think we're ballpark buds here. And I also know that insomnia cookies is in the golden plate club, four and a half forks.

Welcome to the hallowed halls. Wow. What, quite an outing, quite an outing. There should be some sort of cheering. We should get, no, Emma, you probably don't like that idea. Some extra, extra work of, there should be audience. There should be a crowd cheer when that happens likes. That's the live shows are for.

Wow. Golden plate club. Well deserved. For insomnia cookies. We'll take a break. We'll be back with more dough boys. Hey you, you craving fresh, delicious, easy meals, try wild grain. And get their bake from frozen sourdough breads, fresh pastas and artisanal pastries

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You heard me. Free croissants in every box and $30 off your first box when you go to wildgrain.com slash dough boys. That's wildgrain.com slash dough boys or you can use promo code dough boys at checkout. Do it. Welcome back to dough boys. We're here with our guest Mary Sohn and hey, it's time for a segment. Wow. Mitch, this is one we haven't done in a while but you and our guests and our listeners

probably remember the defunct one gotta go meme. One gotta go. Oh, how could we forget? Right. Well, you know one gotta go. We've got a similar segment, but it's its own thing. I'll give a list of four things and we'll collectively decide which one has to go. In our segment, a single item must be banished.

Wow. And as we are about to enter October, the spookiest of months, this is all Hallows Eve Eve edition. Okay. So we are going to be talking about Halloween things, Halloween foods and Halloween, etc. I like it. I love it. Mary, do you like scary? Where do you stand?

Oh, you know, spooky scary is right up my alley. Yeah. What's your like, are you someone who dresses up for Halloween? Are you a big costume person? I used to be and then I think I just had one too spooky of a Halloween. The vibe is very like in Chicago, I feel like it's very fun until it turns to the uh, oh, everyone wants to fight mode. Oh, yeah.

That's a different kind of scary. That's an unfun scary. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's like an I'm in danger scary. I like, do you like, how about scary movies? Are you like, do you like a horror film?

I really do. Also, I know the new Candyman just came out, but the a ridge Candyman is my favorite. Oh, yeah. Oh my god. The original Candyman is so freaking that that I saw that too young and I was so scared. I was like, it was, but it was so it's like so fucking good. I dressed up as a baby for many Halloween's. That would be right in a nightie.

And then people will be like, people are like, what do you do? And like, I would show up to probably like, oh, it's Halloween. I didn't realize. Oh, but I wore a baby nightie. Here's. All right, wise. Here's what here's the ones got to go. Yeah.

Robert, Robert Durst, Jared from Subway, the actual devil and Weiger, who's going to go? For me, I'd probably banish Lucifer, you know, the anti Christ himself. Okay. I think there's a stronger case for getting the devil out of there. All right. So here's how this will work. I'll read a category and four items and we will collectively decide which one or maybe

just individually decide which one must be banished. All right. All right. First, first, first up, Candy bars. And by the way, these were compiled by the drop king, Robert Persinger, our associate producer. First up, Candy bars, Kit Kat, Snickers, three musketeers, Twix, Kit Kat, Snickers, three musketeers, Twix. People are going to get mad at me.

Oh, wait. And what is our version? What's our ripoff version called? One has to leave. A single item must be banished. It's not a ripoff. Okay. It's his own thing.

You try one. All right. So a single item must be banished. And I think I'm, I think this is tough. People are going to be mad at me, but I think I'm going three musketeers. I know that like the right answer is probably Kit Kat's, but I, but I, but I kind of like Kit Kat just for the plainness of them, I guess. I don't know.

The crunch is great too. The crunch is great. I love a three musketeers, but I understand. Snickers are not getting rid of. No. Twix. I like the crunch and the caramel, not getting rid of Twix. But then maybe with Twix and Kit Kat, I don't know, Mary, what do you think?

I hate to jump on the Mitch bandwagon, but I'm saying a banished, a banished item is musketeers for me as well. Wow. Yeah. Wow. Emma, you got to, I'll let you be the deciding vote here. I would say three musketeers too. Wow.

Wow. Maybe not a lot of three. See, people are going to be mad at us because there's going to be some die hard three musketeer fans. But you know what? Man. Get rid of all three of them. Yeah.

Argento, what are their names? D'Artigan. D'Artigan. Just looking them up. B'Artigan. Othos. Z'Artigan. Porthos.

Aramis. Whatever. They're pissed off. They're fucking pissed. I would have probably voted Kit Kat, but I deferred at the consensus. All right. Next up, gummies. Now I'll recuse myself from this because I'm on the record of saying that as gummy ain't yummy.

But the options for gummies are gummy bears, gummy worms, peach rings, and Swedish fish. Gummy bears, gummy worms, peach rings, Swedish fish. Mitch, what do you think? I'll let Mary go first because I'm very particular about my gummies, so I'm not going to go on my whole rant. I do. I love gummies. I will say, I know this is going to be unpopular, but the one that must be banished for me is peach rings.

Wow. Mary, you nailed it. It's peach rings, but I also want to yell at our producer the drop king, Robert Persinger. Yes. Is Swedish fish, I guess they're... It's a tough category to categorize them as gum. You've never had Swedish fish?

No, don't be incensed. What the hell? Emma was bad too. I'm shocked. You've never had Swedish fish? I think that's the angriest Emma has ever been with me. I'm just shocked. What the fuck's going on?

I thought that was one of the most common candies everywhere always. It was like a penny candy. Never had them. You're a baffling human. You're truly baffling. Lots of bears, lots of worms, plenty of peach rings, never had Swedish fish. Really? Yeah, never had them.

I have an issue with them being categorized as gummies. I guess they are. I think they're pretty gummy. They look like gummies. They are gummies, just looking at some images. I guess they are. All right, you're fine, drop king. I'm getting rid of peach rings.

I just, like a little too sweet for me, I guess, is maybe the reason why. Just like a, and honestly, with Swedish fish, you're getting like a different vibe than all the other ones. So I don't want to get rid of them, but they're still fun. Yeah. What do they taste like? They're just Swedish fish. Yeah, they taste like Swedish fish.

They're kind of hard to, they're not. Actually, you might like it because they're not as gummy as some gummies. They're not as gummy. Yeah, they're like, they don't stick to your teeth like some things. Like they're not as, they're not as goopy or gummy as you're not chewing them. They're not as like tough. Like, you know how like some gummy bears are chewing like a, like a tough piece of steak or something.

The Swedish fish, that is, yeah, that was disgusting, comparison. But Swedish fish, you're not, you're gonna, you're gonna chomp right through them. Why? Cause there's not going to be an issue. Wow. Okay. All right. Good to know.

I want to say that Mary and I, same exact, so far we're two for two. Yeah. Peach rings. Emma, what do you think? I fucking love peach rings. So I can't do the peach rings, but it's so hard to choose because I like all of them. But I think I'd have to get rid of the worms. That's so insane, Emma.

That would hurt. So, Emma, now I'm mad at you. I don't feel good about it. But you're fired. Fuck. You hurt her. Emma has that power. I forgot.

All right. Next up, this category is classic Halloween candy. Classic Halloween candy. Okay. And the entrance for this are candy corn, smarties, Tootsie rolls. Jesus. And twizzlers. This is classic Halloween candy.

Candy corn, smarties, Tootsie rolls, twizzlers. I feel like I buy these as things that you would get dropped in a sack if you're trick-or-treating. You're gonna fucking egg through your window if this is what you fucking this these loose candies. This is like dollar store loose candies. Probably have to be a hard-boiled egg just physically, great glass. You know what? Soft-boiled, breaks through the window and then also the yolk still splatters everywhere.

What do you think of that? Man, insult to injury. What do you think, Mitch? Candy corn, smarties, Tootsie rolls, twizzlers. Man, are these loose twizzlers? Like are they in a package or are they just thrown into your Halloween bag loose? Do they have individual twizzlers? Yeah, they usually are like they come in like a little pair.

There's two of them next to each other. There's those too, yeah. Yeah, I know what you're saying. There's the mini ones and then they do have, they do I think have long boys that are just like individually bad or at least they used to. They used to. The jumbos as they call them. LBJ's face is on the packaging. That's weird.

Stick looks like a twizzler. What the fuck? I mean, I guess it's long. Wait, that's not thick? Yeah. All right, let's see here. I'm in trouble. I think that I would have to, god.

So a couple of guys on my street love Smarties, but but wait, what was the first? Okay, I mean, come on. Candy corn. What the fuck? I mean, it's between candy corn and Smarties for me. The other two I'm keeping. And then it's almost a toss up of like, I don't care, get rid of both of them really.

Yeah. Smarties are, Smarties are just too, they're just too, is it tart? Is that what they are? Yes. Chalky. Yeah, they're chalky. They're chalky. Maybe I would just get rid of them because like candy corn at least is

is like Halloween-y, I guess. So like you have, you know, like you can eat one of those for fun. I don't know. But I mean, candy corn sucks too. They're both bad, but I'll get rid of Smarties. Mary, what do you think? Well, again, I don't mean to copycat, Mitch, again. This is great.

Well, I do want to just throw this out there about candy corn. I'm not a fan, except for when somebody bought the pumpkin-shaped ones. And those are actually delicious. It's like kind of like biting into a little candle, but it's very, very good. The smarty, the chalkiness, I'm off the chalkiness. And then it has the audacity to kind of have a bitter sharpness. So that one's got to be banished for me. Wow.

Good choice. Emma. Emma. I think it's, I'm with you. It's a toss up between Smarties and candy corn. But I think I don't, candy corn just feels like chewing on wax to me. It like doesn't taste like anything. I think if I had to choose between chewing on tart chalkiness or nothing,

I'd choose tart chalkiness. So I got to get rid of candy corn. That's fair. I mean, I'm not putting up a fight on that either, but I mean, they both suck. Yeah. I think if I, if I were to weigh in here, I'd also say candy corn. Tootsie rolls and Twizzlers are fine. I'd say it's just, yeah, it's, Smarties I liked as a kid.

Not to throw a complete wrench into it, but are you Twizzlers or red vine people? For me, I was always red vine, but that was also because you would get like Costco had the, the huge bucket. Yeah. The garbage aid is a child. But Costco had like that fucking gigantic, you know, popcorn tin of red vines that would have. Nick, you like 300 in them.

You mostly ate out of a bucket as a child anyways, right? Yes, Mitch, real time. They put a bucket around your neck. Yes. It was trough to mouth. That's what I was doing. All right. Next category, I would say this, that would be one shitty Halloween to come home

with a bag filled with Smarties, Twizzler, like Tootsie roll pops and candy corn. That's not that I dislike. I was a Twizzler household, by the way. We weren't, we weren't red. We were too. Is that a New England thing? I think maybe. I mean, red vines, I think maybe is more West Coast.

I'm not sure though. But, but Twizzlers are fine and good and they're fun to have in your Halloween bag, but like in Tootsie rolls, but like they're the bottom tier of the stuff you want, right? Like even those are the things that you don't want like a ton of. You want like some of, you want the Snickers and the Starburst and the other things, right? Yes, ideally. Yeah. And then, and the mythical, you know, the house and the rich, the rich neighborhood where they

all give out full sized candy bars that every kid talks about and never seems to manifest. Why would rich people give things away for free? That's not in their nature. No, it's a big one. Yeah, that's also true. I feel like it was just like a generous house that would do that. I feel like it was like the rich person. The rich person house would have their lights off.

That's like what they, they just wouldn't, you wouldn't, you couldn't go to their house. A single Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, that's, that's what I like. Oh my God. That's great. Just the single, the one single. Not the mini cup, the full, the full size cup in the individual wrapping. That is, that is a fucking whole run. I like the mini cups fine, but the single cup.

Give me the single cup. I'm with you. Yeah. That's, that one, that one feels like you, you fucking won the Lotto. Mary, where do you stand on red, red vines versus swizzlers? You know, I'd say trash and bowls. Wow. So, not a fan, not a fan.

Yeah, that's fair. Licorice is just such like a fucking 1930s treat. It seems like she went on a piece of licorice, just seems so dated. Red vines makes a, there's like a natural one now that's made with real sugar. And it looks, it's the packaging slightly different. And I've found it in very few places, but if you find them, they're so good. They're so much better than both red vines and twizzlers. They're delicious.

I highly recommend them. Wow. I gotta give this a shot. Good time. Does it change the chew on it? It's like, yeah, it doesn't taste as, it's just not as artificial. It feels like a, it just, I don't know, it's sweeter, but like in the, not in a gross, too sweet way and like a, kind of like a Mexican Coke versus a regular Coke.

Wow. It's just like that little, that little bit of extra oomph. I love it. There you go. All right, next category, classic monsters, classic monsters. Wow, it really is spooky season. That's right. Dracula, Frankenstein, the mummy, and the wolf man.

Wow. Which of these must be banished? Wow. This is very funny. I like this. I do like this a lot. Yes. Um, by the way, Emma helped me out.

I was, I came up with Dracula, Frankenstein, the mummy. I was like, what's the fourth one? And she was like, wolf man. I was like, yeah, oh yeah. I saw this question in the chat. And I didn't know what the fuck was going on. Me either, but now I do. Now it's revealed.

Oh yeah, I just texted that out of context. Sorry. No, those are my favorite questions. Completely out of context, just let's finish this list. Dracula, Frankenstein, the mummy, the wolf man, one must be banished. My friend Luke Michaels used to bite into a beer can like Teen Wolf. It was fucking great. Ouch.

That is fucking awesome. It was cool. What's his dumb Boston nickname? Poover. Is it really Poover? Oh yeah, that's what I call him. Luke, I call them Luke or two. I call them a lot of different things.

He's, but he was, he was an Ithaca friend, a college friend. Oh, okay. Luke is awesome. I love you, Luke. I'll just weigh in real quick and say that the Dracula, the Frankenstein, the wolf man, we know their weakness is. We know that you can get, you can do a stake through the heart or a cross. We know that you can, Frankenstein hates fire when you know that the wolf man,

you take him out with a silver bullet. The mummy, I don't think has a clear weakness. And the mummy terrifies me because he is an ancient evil of ambiguous origin and power. And I, the mummy gets his hands on me. I don't know what he's going to do with me. So I'm choosing the mummy. We're talking Brandon Frazier. I didn't know that you could weigh in.

This is the first one you weigh in on is the fucking most of goblins. I weighed it on a couple of these. Is it, is it, is it Brandon Frazier mummy or is it, who's the other one? Is it Boris Karloff? Who's, who's, who's the classic universal mummy is? I don't know, I'll look it up. The invisible man, you know, the invisible man is actually of those old monster movies is fun, is like a fun one.

Right. Hmm. That was my question to you was, is this a scenario where like you were saying like, we're eliminating one because they're so scary or is it one that we just like think is the lamest? That's, that's the tricky part to me. Okay. I mean, it's however, however you want to interpret it. By the way, the classic mummy of the, the mummy's tomb and the mummy's curse, the movies in the forties, the movies of my childhood, when I was eating black licorice out

of a bucket as a boy in the 1940s, going to the Nickelodeon. The movies were, the movies were, the movies were, the movies were, the movies were the star of those films, Lawn Chaney. Lawn Chaney, the classic, the classic mummy. I got that. I fucked that up. I'll get made fun of online. Wiger. Fire, bad, cookie, good. So does your answer, Frankenstein?

No, I could never get rid of Frankenstein. He's the most like me, uh, which actually makes me want to eliminate him more. I think that I maybe would, I maybe would eliminate the, I would maybe eliminate the, here's the reason why I would eliminate the mummy, both for what you're saying is he is really scary, but man, Dracula is scary. So if it was going by like the scariest Dracula is really scary. Wolfman is sad, but then also if you got bitten, then you became a wolfman. Is that that bad? I feel like that's kind of fun.

Well, I, I mean, I think, I think there's the fear that you don't know what's going to happen. Like first off, you may not know that you're a wolf man at first and then you later find out, you know, because you just like wake up and tattered clothes and there's blood all around, you don't know what you did. But then also, I think if you do know that it's going to happen, there's just like that anxiety all month long as you're waiting the full moon and then you need somebody like chain you up so you don't wreak havoc, you know, kinky. I think I'm going to go with, I think I'm going to go with, I think that I'm going to go with the two lamest ones are the, look, we think that the, well,

the mummy's not that lame either though, but I feel like you're overthinking this. I know Dracula and Dracula and Frankenstein are just our S tier monsters though, aren't they? Very cool. Yeah. And they're very, and they, and they're scaring their own way and then, but Frankenstein is almost a friend. He becomes, he becomes friendly in a lot of the movies and, you know, in a lot of Frankenstein lore. I'm going to, why exactly? I think I might be with you just for, I think I might get rid of the mummy just for, you know, for, for ancient mythical reasons. And then also like just horror reasons, like he's like in the desert and there's the sun is out and stuff, you know, I don't know. I think that's kind of stupid. So,

so the mummy, oh man, this, this is the hardest one. This is the hardest one of all, but the mummy. It's a challenge. Does the mummy talk? I think of, I think of the mummy more as a moner, but I do think that the, there's certain versions of the mummy where the mummy's like smart and he like, he like talks at you, you know. He's been known occasionally to say cookie good. Mary who, what about the creature from the black lagoon? That would have been easy to eliminate at least. Yeah, I don't, who do you, that's one of those things. It's like when you're talking about the all star team, it's like, like how did you know this guy not get picked? And it's just like, well, then who you're going to get rid of, you know, you got to get it. You got to get rid

of someone to make a slot. I don't know. You're saying, you're saying that the creature from the black lagoon is like Jalen Brown basically. Yeah. Not making the team. Wait, did he not make the all star team this year? Oh, did he make the all star team? Maybe he did as a backup or something. Now I've, now there were a lot of alternates because of, there were a lot of alternates because of the, you know, that's how Mike Conley got on. Let me guess. You think LeBron is Dracula? I don't know if that means, if that's like good or bad. What is that? What are we saying if we're calling him a Dracula? I mean, isn't Dracula the best monster? Isn't that like the, that's, I mean, he's, I think so. He's the king. Yeah. Yeah, he's, yeah, you wouldn't eliminate Dracula.

All right. Well, I look through the Eastern Conference all stars for 2021 NBA season. Mary, what do you think? Who do you, who's got, who, who must be banished? Dracula, Frankenstein, the mummy or the wolf man? Well, as much as I also am confused by the mummy, and I don't feel like we know enough about him or them. I think a wolf man feels very triggering to me. Yeah. He's very, the unpredictable nature, like he'd be on a great day and all of a sudden tattered clothing, blood, and that I don't like. That's terrifying. And also too cool, you know? Yeah. Even after my story about poover, it didn't win you over. Miss Jaylen Brown was a reserve on Eastern Conference all stars this year. Yeah,

kind of makes sense. Kind of makes sense. I know he was injured for part of the year, though. So it's, I see why you think he was maybe on the bubble. Emma, what do you think? Which of these, which of these big four of classic monsters would you eliminate? I think the mummy, because there's something about the live dead thing that freaks me out. Right. Like what's under that rap? And I don't know. I don't like it. Yeah. Yeah. In some versions, what's under that rap is like Beatles. Exactly. It's like terrifying. Yeah, I don't want to see that shit. All right. The mummy takes it in a split decision. And it's just an old one. Yeah. It's, he's kind of gross. Just like the, if he,

if he grabbed you, just like the old, it's fucking gross. Yeah. Old shitty fucking paper. Yeah. I have never, I don't know that version of it where it's just the one big wrapped up Beatles, by the way. I don't know why you're talking about where the reveal is that the mummy is a Beatle. I'm from Liverpool. Do you know the way to Blue Jay Way? All right. Final category. Scary sound effects. These are compiled by our producer, Emma.

Oh, I saw some. Scary sound effects. I saw some text about this too. Yes. Why did you do this just with me on the text? I mean, you're not going to figure it out. But Mitch, did you go listen to the effects I sent? No, of course not. Exactly. It's fine. All right. Let's, we'll do these in sequence. So Emma, if you want to, you want to get the, get these ready. Should we just play them all in a row? This is the longest, this is like a 20 minute segment that's the dumbest shit.

This is the longest dumbest segment. This is good stuff. Ten minutes of me, we're trying to figure out which monster will eliminate. So it's my fault. I honestly, this was going on so long I cut one. So we're not going to go back to it. You got to tell us what it was. I'm not, because then I say it, you're going to want to talk about it. So I'm not going to tell you. All right. Fine. All right. But you just tell us and we'll edit it out. What was it? It was, this was Mount Slashmore.

Okay. We're going to do that. We're going to do it next. So let's do the sound effects. We're going to, we're going to do it. Okay. All right. Scary sound effects. Emma, do we have these ready to go? Yeah. All right. Okay. First up, creaking door. Okay. Next, next one. Is it that specific creaking door? Is it like the idea? I would say these are examples. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. To give you a point of reference for what we're, what we're talking about.

Next up, rattling chains, rattling chains. I wish I had listened to these before you did it. Because I would have, I would have said look for any others. Next one, wolf howl. Wolf howl. Hold on one second. Oh God, please let it be weird. It's not a wolf man. It's an actual wolf. And finally, zombie moan. Zombie moan. All right. So creaking door, rattling chains, wolf howl, zombie moan.

Are your options? Which scary sound must be banished? Emma, did you say you came up with these? I sourced a whole bunch of them. So those were the ones I picked for today. I don't know. I got other options if you want to hear them. These are great. These are perfect. Emma, I think you're a super producer. The best there is in the game. And I think those sounds suck. See, I didn't quite understand what Yx was doing with these.

So I also had a wolf howl that was like more in the distance, which maybe is spookier. I don't know. This is perfect. This just gave us a taste of what we're talking about. Mitch, what do you think? Creaking door, rattling chains, wolf howl, zombie moan. What would you banish? I'm keeping creaking door, even though that can just happen without anything. But if you're alone and you hear a creaking door, that's scary. That's scary. So fucking scary.

Yeah. Scary stuff. I mean, like zombie moan here was really bad, but I'm not going to judge it on. And like wolf howl. Look, here are my two that are staying. Again, this is another situation here. Wolf howl is staying and creaking door is staying because those are classic Halloween sounds. Right? Chains rattling is like a very specific haunted noise that I just don't know if it really would, if I heard that, I'd be like, what is that noise? But I wouldn't think it was like as scary if I even just heard a door creak.

You know what I mean? Like I think that something, I don't know. So I think I'm going to go with chains. You'd be scared out of your gourd. Of course I would. If you were in the basement of your mom's place in Quincy, Massachusetts, where you live and you heard rattling chains outside coming down the hall, you'd be terrified. I mean, I'd be afraid of any of those sounds, but then if you put it that way,

I'm like, well, then the creaking door I'd be the least scared of. If that was the way we'll go. I'd be pretty not scared of a wolf howl inside my own home, but out in the wilderness, I'd be scared, but if you heard a wolf howl in your home, you wouldn't be scared. Well, no, like acoustically, if I could place it inside my home, of course I'd be very scared. But if I heard a wolf howl in the distance from inside my home, I'd be like, oh, there's a wolf out there.

So yeah, these are all contextual. If I was out in the woods, I'd be scared. If I was at an Ithaca college, I'd just think it's poover. I wouldn't be scared at all. Biting into a can of Bud Light. I'm going to go with the chains rattling. It reminds me too much of Marley. It's like it reminds me of like old ghost that's like chained up for some reason,

and it doesn't it doesn't scare me as much. Fair enough. Mary, what do you think? Creaking door, rattling chains, wolf howl, zombie moan. Yeah, the rattling chain, maybe especially in this version, feels like maybe poover was just locking up his bike or some loose mosaics and just getting it out. Although I can say the zombie groan.

Yes. Pretty. I think I saw that. Mary, no matter where you heard it in your house, outside your house. Terrifying. It's true. But Mary, you're saying it's hot, right? Yeah, yeah.

I'm saying it was pretty hot. I think I saw the sound file. I think I said a zombie. Oh, I think it was a zombie. Yeah, but like not because some like super sexual thing was happening with zombie, but more like he was alone. He was kind of bored. He was like, oh, and then we just caught the tail end.

So, oh, if you will. You know, I got to go chains. I got to go chains. We're back on back on board. Back on board. I'm with you. I think I'm with you on chains. And what do you think?

I think if we're getting rid of like the least spooky, it's the least spooky sound, I would say the chains because there are a lot of things. Like you said, locking up a bike. Yeah. I mean, you use chains for all kinds of not so spooky things. I guess, yeah, chains make sense. We review chains on the podcast, but not this type of chain.

Okay, we can do Mount Slashmore, Mitch, but we have to be quick. We just have to, we just have to decide. Just shoot the hip and pick one because we're running long. Can I say that the chains were particularly bad for a sound effect in this, in this, in this segment. They were bad chains. No, take it. They weren't super scary, but they, but they were,

that's maybe a hard thing to source. All right, Mount Slashmore, let's do it. We got to do it. Our friends at Blank Check, this is the big four of Modern Killers. Wow, they gave you, they gave you a top four. Well, I got this from listening to their podcast. All right, here they are. Freddie, Jason, Leatherface, and Michael Myers.

Freddie from Nightmare Down Street. Jason from Freddie on 13th. Freddie the 13th, Leatherface from Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and Michael Myers from the Halloween franchise. So great. This is tricky because Michael Myers, I believe, is the original Slash. You just got to answer.

This is the whole, I said we got to do this quickly. I just, Michael Myers, I think was the original Slasher, wasn't he? Yeah, I think so. He's the first, isn't he? The shape. Kind of the origin of this. I mean, look, Freddie and Jason get in my Slasher Hall of Fame. I love those two that like that was what I was raised on.

So I love those two. So it's between Leatherface and Michael Myers. And I'm going to eliminate, I'm going to let, you know what? Fuck Texas. They've been a fucking pain in the ass. So the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, he gets the cut. I'm going, I'm getting Mike Myers in there. Wow.

He's good. Mary, what do you think? This is an all-star team. They're all good. This is tough. Freddie, Jason, Leatherface, Michael Myers. Yeah, I think it's got to be Leatherface. Got to go for me.

Wow. Yeah. Wow. Yep. Emma, you got a preference here? I can't, this is impossible. I can't decide. Yeah.

It's a very, it is very hard. This is the hardest. This is very, very hard. I'll tip the scales to Leatherface, but I hope he doesn't listen to this episode. Wow. I don't want him coming after me. Don't you usually have dinner at his house? Are you in that scene with the family around the table?

Family around the table. Are you in their fucked up meals? I'm not a freak. Well, man. Hey, that was a single item must be banished. Just like a restaurant via your feedback. Boy, we have a long email today too. Sorry, I didn't think this thing would go so long of a long email.

Sorry, man. What was it? We'll do it quick. Just like a restaurant via your feedback. Well, we'll try. Let's open up the feedback. And today's email is from Sunmoy. This is a long road, but I think we have to tackle it.

So Sunmoy writes, I'm the alleged hot dog thief referenced in Chirinton's email as read on your recent Einstein Brothers episode. So Mitch, you remember the hot dog thief incident? Mary, for context, I will recap some of that email. This is from the email explaining the original incident. Here we go. On my last night in New York, my friend of 30 years took me out for a final night of eating and drinking.

He also brought one of his insufferable friends, a guy I didn't even know. I was having a bad night. Then when I think things can't get any worse, he, referring to the friend, the guy who wrote this email, the new email, he asked to take a bite of my hot dog and eats the whole thing. So Chirinton, who wrote the original email, is saying that Sunmoy asked to take a bite of his hot dog and then ate his entire hot dog and they have had a beef ever since. So back to Sunmoy's email.

This is the new email. Was the hot dog beef or pork? Do you know? It was not specified. We'll try to get some more info there. After listening to the feedback at the end of the Einstein Brothers Bagels episodes on August 26, I was astounded gobsmacked. Did they really just hear the Doughboy say the name of my oldest friend?

Did they really just read his grievance of the hot dog incident, of which I was the counterparty? Did they actually go on to call me a psycho and a weirdo? I feel compelled to offer my side of the story. There are four key pieces of information that I would like to offer in my defense. I had no idea Chirinton was having such a bad night. Chirinton abandoned the last bite of his hot dog for what felt like 15 minutes. He had then gone to the bathroom, returned, still hadn't finished,

and I was under the impression that he was done with his meal. I ate the delicious but cold dog and ate it so that the server would not grab the plate thinking he was done. On the service, I understand that I may have overstepped my bounds. Three, I was under the impression that our evening of eating and merriment had only just started and we would eat again as we usually did. And my other quote-unquote insufferable friend would not be continuing on with us. Four, after I saw the lasers being fired from Chirinton's eyes directly into my soul,

I immediately offered to buy him a fresh new hot dog. They were good hot dogs. He did not accept my offer, maintained his rage toward me, and then stormed off and wouldn't answer his phone. As Chirinton alluded, in his Feedback Note to Your podcast, there was a tense email exchange that followed. Chirinton feeling completely justified in this position that it was being a psycho, a position he's still maintaining eight years later,

shared the private email exchange with our group of mutual friends. Then they took this email exchange and filmed a dramatic reading of it, all caps, without my consent or any mention of me. So this is a four and a half minute video that we're obviously not going to play all of, but we'll play a little bit of this video just for context. This is the dramatic reading of the email exchange between these two, I guess, as strange friends. What the fuck?

All right, ready? Yeah. Dear Lord. Let's begin some title cards here. The following is Reconstruction. Hello there. We are finally moved into Madison after a week in Hawaii in a 16-hour car ride from New York. What the fuck?

So I finally have some time to write an email and help clear the air. It's easier for me to do this than it was a phone where emotions can run high. So this continues on for another four minutes. This email in its entirety without coming up to the camera. By the way, for those of you listening to this, this is shot in black and white very dramatically over the shoulder angles. This ends. I do feel unfairly attacked.

So I'd love to hear your guys take on this situation now knowing another perspective. I'm thinking it'll be something like all parties involved are insane idiots. So there you go. First email accuses this friend of asking to take a bite of his hot dog and eating the whole thing. Follow-up email says, I'm the friend. That's not what happened. Here's my side that the hot dog was abandoned and I thought we were going to continue partying. And this has endured ever since apparently eight years ago.

This changes everything in my eyes. Did we know it was eight years ago with the first email? I don't think so. I don't think we had that context. Because that makes it so much more insane. Yeah, it's insane to be talking about this hot. I can't believe you remember this. Of course, look, Scoop and Caroline made it so that I missed a meal in Italy a couple years ago

and I still hold it against them to this day. So I get food grudges. I have food grudges. Totally understand, yeah. But this is just, you left your hot dog there. It was cold. I get wanting the end of it. But then if you offered to buy another one, maybe the result is just that you're old dorks.

Doe boys listeners? I don't know. I think that, I mean, this really changed everything in my eyes. I'm staggered that we got an email from the other side. It was not expecting this. I think I'm swapping sides. Why? Because I think I'm flip-flopping.

This is a much more, I mean, this is a much more thorough explanation of the events that transpired and a pretty convincing case. Maria, I mean, what do you think is coming into this fresh? I mean, again, I hate to reference my time at Bubblegum Shrimp Company, but I know that this is a thing that if I accidentally took someone's plate that looks definitely done and they were like, oh, I really wanted to do that. I would offer, okay, well, great. Please, I'd be happy to order you something to go a fresh, full-ass meal.

People would be very incensed, though, that their perfect leftover bite was taken. So I really get it. But I really do agree. Having heard the first thing where someone has just eaten somebody's slow hot dog is one thing. But to know that it was truly like a quarter of it left, it was cold, and that he had gone to the bathroom, I don't know. Yeah, that context is pretty essential.

Just like Dork City, you know? Yeah. Yeah, Dork City. All roads lead to Dork City. By the way, join us in Dork City for Docon 2022. Let me see. I'm going to try to dig up the original email. But Emma, I don't know.

It does. What do you think hearing this? I think that it sounds like you guys were drinking, and it's very easy to misconstrue things when drinking. And also, yeah, if you, I mean, I would never reach over and take the last bite of someone's meal without being like, here, are you done with that? Can I eat it? It's weird not to ask before you take something off of someone else's plate,

but also to hold a grudge over a hot dog butt eight years later is absolutely nuts to me. There are so many more important things to waste your energy on. But apparently, it's still a very sensitive topic. But I mean, he offered a fresh hot dog. You could just cut the butt off and take that with you if that's really all you wanted, right? Yes. I mean. He offered a new one.

Just get a new one. I don't know. I don't think I've ever held a grudge over a hot dog. Now I'm like, why don't you get the other hot dog? Yeah, why don't you get the other hot dog? Get that other hot dog. And now I think you're a fucking dork that can't eat two hot dogs. Get the second hot dog.

I mean, I would understand if you were like, hey, I was going to eat that. I would appreciate if you didn't do that and then be like, but no worries. Like you can get my next meal or my next bite of food or something. Like make your feelings known, but an eight year grudge is a lot. He offered to rectify it on the moment. It feels like that maybe that Chirinton was like dealing with some other stuff with leaving, that it was like, I'm leaving the city that I've lived in and I'm going somewhere else. And those emotions were maybe running high and he probably overreacted.

That was my other thought. There's clearly something deeper. This is just, you know, the straw that broke the camel's back. Yes. Was he moving to Dork City? Apparently they don't have hot dogs in Dork City. We all have IBS here. Actually, you know what?

With the reveal of someone asking if it's pork or beef and IBS, I definitely also live in Dork City. So I'm there with these guys. I looked up original email that started this off and this was, and this was, you know, as of this, this record was about a month ago on Tony Rodriguez's episode when we first addressed this, but the subject line of that original email is friendship ending food transgressions. Wow.

So have these people not spoken in eight years? I don't know. Is that what I'm hearing? If this is how, hopefully this leads to some sort of reconciliation if you have not been in contact, because this is, first off, if you two happen to both listen to this shitty podcast, and this is sheer coincidence that this is how this came about, then clearly you should still be friends because you're not going to have a lot of other options. You both have awful tastes.

You're Dorks. Just be friends again. You like garbage. Be friends again. I mean, if they really haven't talked in that long, that's insane. But I also want to say that I don't remember that first email at all, just to show you that I forget everything that we do. I just don't remember any of that.

I 100% get it. Dustin the Wind. Well, hey, maybe we'll have closure on this in a future feedback. If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email us at dowboyspodcasts at gmail.com, or leave us a voicemail at 830. Go to that's 830-463-6844. And to get the Dowboys double or weekly bonus episode,

join the Golden or Platinum Play Club at patreon.com slash dowboys. Mary Sohn, such a delight to have you back. Thank you so much for making so much time for us. It was so much fun. So fun to talk with you. We love you here. Anything you would like to plug at this time? Boy, yeah, maybe AP Bio on Peacock streaming

and work in progress on Showtime. And just a quick shout out to those fellas in the video. Gorgeously shot. And as an actor, I really wish for that sort of stillness as an actor. It was true. I wish all your listeners could watch this video. It was really nice actually. Well, there you go.

It was. It was very well shot. I think Paul Thomas Anderson directed it. That'll do for this episode of Dowboys. Until next time for Mr. Slice, Mike Mitchell, I'm Nick Weigher. Happy eating. See ya. What's up, everybody? It's your boy, Mr. Slice.

And I got some very exciting news. We've added a late show in Boston. That's right. Two shows back to back in Boston on February 5th. You can get your tickets at headgum.com slash live. That's headgum.com slash live. Do it. Want to see the sources for this week's intro?

Check the episode description.