Doughboys - Jersey Mike’s with Drew Tarver

Episode Date: June 8, 2017

The ‘boys welcome actor and comedian Drew Tarver (Bajillion Dollar Propertie$) to discuss his new gig portraying Carl Hardee Jr. in commercials, and to review Jersey Mike’s Subs, his sandwich chain of choice. Drew brings some sweet treats from his dad’s candy shop, to weigh them against some confections from Mitch’s mom’s favorite Quincy chocolatier.Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It's not TV. It's HBO. In 1996, the pay cable network started using this iconic slogan which they would carry through the first decade of the 21st century. In 1997, shortly after adopting this intentionally elitist marketing approach, HBO ordered a one-hour crime drama pilot from David Chase, a veteran of network dramas like The Rockford Files and Northern Exposure. Originally envisioned in Chase's words as, quote, more like a live-action Simpsons, once he came to develop it, he settled on a darker, grittier tone, chronicling the dueling domestic and professional worlds of mafia crime boss Tony Soprano. The January 10th, 1999 premiere date of The Sopranos would become the equivalent of Zero AD in the era of prestige

TV, making a star out of character actor James Gandolfini. With modern series dominated by brooding anti-heroes who wreck up body counts, it's difficult to convey how shocking and intriguing it was to audiences of the time, used to the black and white morality of network procedurals, to depict the show's protagonist relentlessly cheating on his wife and personally committing brutal murders. The series also pioneered pay TV's high-low approach to gaining an audience, combining precise writing and artful filmmaking with graphic violence and often gratuitous female nudity. Behind the scenes, Chase's heavily hands-on borderline megalomala... I'll pick that up. Behind the scenes, Chase's heavily hands-on borderline megalomaniacal approach to TV production

became the template for modern showrunners as he personally rewrote every script for the series. And as much a character as Tony, Carmella, Silvio, Livia, Polly Walnuts, Bobby Bacala, Johnny Sack, and Big Pussy was the state where Tony oversaw his crime empire that masqueraded as a sanitation business, New Jersey. In 1956, Mike Subbs opened in the small New Jersey town of Point Pleasant, becoming a fixture in the community. A hard-working high schooler named Peter Cancro began working there in 1971, and in an accelerated Horatio Alger tale, he'd purchased the store just three years later. In 1987, Cancro began franchising his restaurant, and his empire sandwich shops would expand for the next three decades, and now sling submarines at 1,500 locations,

renamed to reflect its Garden State heritage. This week on Doe Boys, Jersey Mike's. Welcome to Doe Boys, the podcast about chain restaurants. We're production of Feral Audio.com. I'm Nick Weigar, alongside my co-host, Les Fuckable Friar Tuck, the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell. Les Fuckable Friar Tuck. That's a good one. That was courtesy of our friend Chase Mitchell, good friend of the show, future guest. I feel like he's put on, Chase, you're submitting too many anti-mitch. What are these called? Mitch insults? What the fuck do you call them? Mitch roasts. Oh, and if you got one of your own, roastspoonman at gmail.com is the address. Yeah, he's taking a few different shots to

get on the show, but he's sent some good ones. He's a professional writer, he knows what he's doing. Fuck you, Chase. Mitch, you are a man who is often in a surly mood, but you have a reason for being surly today. Wait, what? That actually is not true. You don't think you're a generally surly man? I think you're surly quite a bit at the time. I'd say a lot of times you're convivial, you're a good jovial guy, sometimes you're a party animal, but a lot of times you're bitter and surly. That's you too. Yeah, I know it's both of us. I'm saying, forget that I said that. I think on the podcast, I am surly a lot. I'm mad at you, and there's a thing that we've played up where I'm like, you're a fuck you, wager, and you're annoying. Yes, I mean... That carries

over to real life. That's our real life dynamic. You get mad at me all the time. You're mad at me texting yesterday. I just think that's fine. I guess maybe you're right. I don't know. Look, I'll say that this is naturally, we have microphones in front of us. Things are going to be a little performative and amped up, but I would say you are generally a surly man. Not all generally is the wrong word we use. You have a significant percentage of the time where I would say it's fair to characterize you as surly. But I'm thinking of our friends, and now I'm like, I'm surly. I think of other people we hang around with, and I'm like, I feel like the least surly to me sometimes. Sure. Relative to other people in our circle of friends, there are surlier men,

but I would say that you are... The general population would consider you surly. Look, here's all... That's not true. I would say, look, I feel like you're being a little surly right now. Because you're saying some dumb fucking shit. Look, forget, I'm not even trying to insult you. I was just trying to say... Look, you're talking down to me right now. Look, I'm not even trying to insult you. I wasn't trying to insult you. I know what surly means. I am mad at you right now because I think you're being a fucking idiot. But listen, you're right. I have a reason to be surly. Yes. I've had health issues. I'm trying to get myself healthy. I'm falling apart over here. I got a fucking colonel stuck in my tooth way up in my gum. A corn kernel, a popcorn kernel. Popcorn,

you turned... You stabbed me in the fucking back popcorn. You're one of popcorn staunchest defenders. I like popcorn a lot. You know what's fucked up is I had a hot dog at the movie theater for an upcoming double. We saw a movie. I had a hot dog. I said, that's good enough. I hadn't eaten anything all day. In the business, we call that a tease. You just dropped a little tease. How could I not be surly? I feel like I'm not even a surly. I feel like if you talk to people I work with, I don't think that I'm a surly man. Yeah, I think probably you're... Look, I don't think people would generally characterize you as surly. I think they would probably think of things like Mitch is a sourpus. Fuck off. He's maybe a sourpus. And I think people would also

say that you kind of have a... You're defeated? Like you have like a defeated sort of air? I'm defeated. Sure. Yes, I am. I've been that way for 20 years. Look, let's forget everything that we said earlier. Mitch, you're a man who was often defeated, but you have a reason to be defeated today. You have a corn kernel stuck in your teeth. A corn kernel way lodged up in my gum. I got a dentist appointment on Wednesday. It's driving me fucking crazy. That's miserable. I can just feel it back there. I'm sorry, buddy. It sucks. It's the worst. I can't help but like constantly lick at it with my tongue. Right. You always think you'll be able to wedge it out of there and you just

can't do it. You normally have your tongue hanging out of your mouth anyway. You're gonna say something like that? You're a real piece of shit. You know that? You know what's fucked up about you? What? Go for it. Lay in to me. Is you pretend not to be upset? What do you mean I pretend not to be upset? You say, ah, that's great. Ah, everything's great. When really, you're probably the most angry in your head of anybody. You think I internalize my emotions? Yes. Yeah, I can see that. I think that's probably true. 100%. I think I probably do sort of like outwardly project a calm at times and inside I am boiling. I think that's true. Yes. Yeah. That's bad. I was, yeah, I should let it out more, I guess. Yes. And also,

I want to tell you, it's easy to read. You think I don't have a great poker face? No, not at all. People can sort of tell when I'm seething. New Roger Waters came out. I guess now this is gonna be almost, it's gonna be about a week old at this point, but yeah, the new Roger Waters came out. I'm listening to that. Deja Vu. Great song. Yeah. I'm a big Pink Floyd fan. Do you, did you listen, Nick? Did you buy it? I haven't no. I don't, I mean, I'll get into it at some point and just don't keep up with music as it comes out. I got two tickets to Roger Waters live. You want to, are you guys, you're gonna say like, hey, can I take your wife, right? That's where this is leading. You're gonna ask to take either my mom or my wife. I honestly

had not thought about it, but is Natalie free that way? You put the idea in my head. Right. That's fair. Mitch, do you have a drop for us? I do. How to how? To Spoon Nation. Saturn as the sun. Moana on the other hand. I love that at the Oscars that girl crushed it. She looked ravishing. I mean, she is a child. She's 17. Take it easy. Beautiful child. She looked great. The Moana girl looks just perfectly thick enough. So moist. You're bringing that up again. Yeah. She is still a child. She needs to mature. Sweating, shirtless. She needs to grow up. Oh man. Like put clothes on my body. What the fuck? Wow. This is it. That episode fucking went off a cliff and sucked. This should be the last one. The rock is going to come and kick my ass. Oops.

I would just say that that's kind of like a little Disney cross pollination there. You have the Beauty and the Beast song. Maybe you should have thrown a Moana track in there. Ooh. Criticism. Just a little bit, just a little note. Well, Andrew Schwartz, Weigert's got a little bit of criticism for you. Maybe too clever by half there. I have a feeling you guys will like this one. Fingers crossed. Stay frosty, Andrew. Does that mean me? Am I frosty? Yeah, I think you're kind of a frosty man. What the fuck? You got like a layer of frost on you. I'm frosty. I'm shaped like frosty. Twitter handle, entourage, schlopp, S-C-H-L-O-P. Very cool. Mitch, we should introduce our guest. Thanks, Andrew. Yes, we should. One of the funniest

guys. One of the funniest dudes from Bajillion Dollar Properties, County Bang Bang and the podcast Big Grande's Teacher's Lounge, which is available on howl.fm. Drew Tarver is here. Hi, Drew. Hello. Hey, thanks for having me, guys. Thanks for sitting through that prolonged intro. This is a long overdue. Yes, and help us make this funny. No, that was great. That was great. As someone who hangs out with you, not as much as Weigert, I don't find you surly. Thank you. See? I find them like really fun. Okay. But like not defeated in an inelikeable way. Sure, yeah. You know what I mean? See? You're a sad sack. Why do I? But then again, I don't... Right? You can look at like a sad sack. You've been defeated since you were what, 10?

Probably around 10 years. I was sure. Weigert, I mean, probably similar for you, right? Yeah, you sort of like in middle school, you're sort of like, oh, okay, I see where I'm going to fit into society. Yeah, I figured my lot in life. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I was always, I used to live on your street and I would always be very excited to see you. I know. We never, we never saw each other enough. I mean, I sit inside and don't do anything. So I probably saw you guys outside having fun. Well, no, you would invite me over and I would always be like, is, would it be weird if I can't, you know what I mean? Sure. Like, you know what? I would never, ever, ever, you know, especially when I lived alone. Uh-huh. Like, I love having people around turn on the tube,

just have people hang out. I'm a big fan of that. Yeah. Here's what I'd say about Mitch's house is that you can just walk up to it, open the door and walk in and sit down and he'll just take it in stride. Yeah. I've just walked in and he's just had a Celtics game on and been looking at his phone in the couch and he's like, hey, I was going. That's how we first met. Yeah. Yeah, no, I would have loved to have you come over. You know what? I spend a lot of downtime here and I don't do much. So I don't blame you for not. I get, I get it being weird to come over to someone's house. Yeah. I mean, like, I think I was worried about the window of time. I was like, it's 9 p.m. Is he like, does he not want, so I think like what I need to know because my sister

still lives, he's bathing. My sister still lives on your street. That's right. So I'm occasionally there. So I'm on bye. Okay. What's the time? Like, what's the time frame that would be like 9 p.m. I'm bathing. You know what? I would say, you know, if you're, if you are swinging by like 230 to five, I'm either just, you know, done with lunch and hanging out. If I'm not working, I'm hanging around here just doing some stuff around the house and relaxing or you know what I mean? Yeah. Great. I've already gone to my trainer at that point, I feel like. So I'm just kind of here hanging out. You're chilling. Okay. So 230 to five, if I'm in the area, I'm just going to drop by. Yeah. Maybe send a text in just in case. Yeah. That's right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, no,

you need to come by on your own. Do you want a text or is it more fun to kind of be old tired? And you came by and knocked on the door. I think that's funny. That's fun. Sure. Why not? That's fun. Yeah. People don't pop in anymore. Yeah. Yeah. We could bring back the pop in. I see disorient. If someone showed up at my house unannounced, I would be disoriented. Yeah. I'm very confused. Well, I think there's something fun about that because there's so much preparation. If you've been text, you get to put on your, you know, whatever your personality is. Yes. Yeah. You don't get that chance if somebody just drops by. Yes. You know what, here is, I think Weiger is right that I am very, I can be very boring. Like I will just be sitting

there watching TV, but I like company. I've always liked company. I enjoy being on my phone for an hour next to someone on their phone for an hour. Yeah. Like even if we just check in occasionally. Yeah. That actually is a lot of fun. That's, that means you're really close actually, I think. Do you know what is, I just thinking back to college and I was like, Oh, like it was a bummer when sometimes like just an annoying guy would drop by or something and then you feel like you would be stuck with him, which is an open-dory college thing. But right when you, when it, when it's a house, only people you like are coming by your house. You know what I mean? You're not getting, you're not getting some random, some random weirdo coming

in. You know what I mean? Yeah. You don't have 120 people on your dorm floor and then Kevin stops by just because you have Soul Calibur on the Sega Dreamcast. You don't really feel like playing. That seems very specific. Very specific. Oh, let's just say that I, there was a guy named Kevin on my floor who liked to play my Sega Dreamcast. Soul Calibur was a great, like that was a great pop-in game though. Like, I feel like it's actually fun to like those fighting games. Drew and I are nodding. Yes. Big nods over here. You're a gamer. Mitch, you're a gamer. I'm a gamer. I didn't own, I did not own a Dreamcast. Right. With good reason. I mean, that the game didn't, but I mean, like those sorts of games, you know, I mean, there was, that is one thing I definitely

do miss about, even though that specific guy was annoying. I do actually don't even know his name was Kevin. If there, there's probably a guy named Kevin who I liked and now I'm, he thinks that this is about him. If he's listening, I'm sorry to that Kevin because I don't, I don't remember the name of the guy who was annoying, but I didn't like him. Whatever. I thought of Kevin because that was just like a generic Kevin McAllister, very trouble maker. Right. That's what, that was the association in my head, but that is the thing I miss of just like playing Smash Brothers or Mario Kart, like in person with people. IRL if you will. Yeah. That just doesn't really happen that much in adulthood. You have to make that an event. You have to make that like the night. Yeah. And then you have to do

other things in addition to that. When I was at college, I got the GameCube, but there wasn't enough Nintendo 64 like with the groups of people I hung around with. Sure. Because that would have been great. I think it was just in that weird zone where it had just gotten so old that it wasn't also retro old. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. Cause nowadays you can play like some GoldenEye or some Mario Kart 64, some original, some old school SSB and people will be like, Oh, this is fun. This is like what I used to do when I was a kid. I think it was a small, small window. I just, for whatever reason. Yeah. I didn't, cause I would have loved, I would have loved that. Hey, you know what? If you're out there and you have a favorite game that used to play versus

your friends in person, not online. I'm going to talk about World of Warcraft and talk about the world of earth. What games did you like to play with your friends? Hashtag IRL gaming picks. Mine were Mario Kart was big. Of course, GoldenEye was big. GoldenEye was the, that was a game changer. Can I even get into GoldenEye? Wow. Here's the thing. At the same time, I was a PC gaming guy, had half life, came out around the same time, much better frame rate. And I was such a frame rate snob for a time that the slow frame rate in GoldenEye combined with the N64 controls, which were cumbersome compared to the mouse and keyboard. You fucking loser. I'm just saying that made me like half life more. And I didn't like, I couldn't get into GoldenEye as much.

GoldenEye was awesome. Did you, did you game at all? I, I, uh, I quit after Nintendo 64 because I couldn't, when there became two joysticks, like with like Halo and you would have to walk and also face the way you want to walk. I would just end up walking sideways or backwards or spinning around. I just have bad thumb, dual thumb coordination. And then also I heard that that translated over into real life. Yes. You were walking sideways. Yeah. I was playing too much Halo. I was walking backwards and just like getting kill shot and without even noticing. Right. Um, but the game I love that I lose my mind over right now and IRL gaming pick would be Luigi's Mansion for a week. I lose my mind to that game. Like I really enjoy playing like,

because the, I feel like the, the ghost or the odds are stacked so against your favor. If you're looking for the ghost, it's just so hard to beat the ghost. If the person's good at all. Yeah. This was the multiplayer version. What was that? Was that part of a compilation? What was that in? Yeah. Possibly. Yeah. It was like part of the, well, because there's, there's the Namco, didn't they do the arcade version? Nick is looking it up. Okay. Okay. This is the one where you, it also is like in that package where you like chase after Mario and you try to jump on him. Right. Oh, this could be like a Nintendo. It's one of those one of the friend ones. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. What was that call? That was a, that was great. And I feel like that, like,

I bet you there's huge fans of that out there that, because I didn't, I feel like I didn't purchase that. Nintendo world. Well, I guess it's Nintendo world. Yes. Right. I guess it's only for Wii U. Yes. Yes. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was a, that was, that was, I should have played that game more. I feel like I didn't play it enough. Wii U is a tricky one, but that, but there were some, there were some great gems. There's some hits. Yeah. I became like a real dick at a party once because I had like, I, there was a, four of us were playing as the dream team. We called ourselves the dream team because we beat the ghost a couple of times. True. You are a very, very nice person, but calling yourselves a dream team, but you guys are big and we had like somebody

like went outside to like, just like, I don't know, get more beer. And so we lost a member of the dream team. And then another person came and was like, Oh, I'll play. And we had a very specific philosophy of where we would get in a room and flash out. Like that's what we should get in a room, flash out, and then you would have to do a battery run or a bat run as we got it. Very clever short name of battery. And he wouldn't do it. And I quit. I was like, I can't play with this guy. I can't play with this guy. And I walked out. True. It was true. It was monstrous. Name him. Name him. So I think it was Anthony Geo stepped outside. Okay. He was a part of the dream team. And Dave Christensen sat in. Oh my God. And one of the nicest men. The nicest guy. But first

it's in. We're raking you buddy. You're fucked up. No, that could be wrong. I was kind of drunk when this was happening. Right. But I think it was that and Christensen should never talk to me again for that reason. Like there should be. He should just honestly be like, I can't deal with this guy. Christensen, you're a supporter of this podcast. You've always been very nice about it, but you're dead to the Doughboys and to Drew. I'm sorry. Yeah. Christensen, not only you're dead to us, you're getting buried in unmarked graves. Yeah. And maybe your ghost will come back and hopefully get sucked up Luigi's back. Is that what happens? Yeah, you got to get a bat run and flash out though. Whatever that means. Unless it wasn't you in which case, we're sorry. Yeah.

It could be totally different people. Yeah, Luigi, like Luigi's mentioned, there's also the arcade version where you kind of get that that real life gust buster, which you think sucks. I don't like it as much. I think that I think the actual game is better. I feel like sometimes those arcade versions are it's on rails. Yeah, it's on rails too. Yeah, we don't love rail stuff. I used to play like playing Super Monkey Ball G. Oh, sure with friends and you know what? Nidhogg. If you want to talk about some like current steamish games, Nidhogg is a lot of fun. I haven't played it. There's there. Oh, that's great. There's a few. There's a few phone ones. Drew, you're you're a southern boy. I am. Yeah, I grew up in Georgia.

Like that's right. Rural Honey Boo Boo territory. Rural Georgia. Have you heard about Mama June? Oh, yeah, I know about Mama June. She's gone from not to hot. She's dropped a lot of weight. I haven't seen the the transformation. I didn't know when this happened. I just sent it to Nick. So I have a photo of it on my phone. I'm not a weirdo who who just because I remember she like I all I remember is there was something going on with Sugar Bear and like whoa. We'll tweet that image out so you guys can have a reference or you can just Google just Google Mama June after picture. Holy shit. I had no idea. Yeah, she's really dropped a lot of weight. Good for her. That's amazing. Mama June. She's single, right? Well, I remember I think she did she break up

with Sugar Bear because there was like some child molestation going on. Something went down with Sugar Bear. Honey Boo Boo was that dark? Did they? Yeah, it got super dark. That's fucking awful. It went from super sweet talking about Sketty to like just a straight up child molestation ring or something with Sugar Bear until like a Netflix documentary series. It quickly turned dark. So what is it? What is wrong with your people down there, Drew? Nothing. No, it's those are my people. I'm pretty trashy. You know, I got some trash in me. I would say like in relation to this but podcast specifically, I have a very trashy palette because of where I grew up. Like I all vegetables I ate as a child, which mainly were only green beans or different

type of beans, lima beans, butter beans, the bean collection. They were all just like heavily salted or like cooked with bacon. So I never like, I mean, I occasionally would like eat broccoli that somebody else's mom cooked. Not my mom. Right. As far as there's collard greens and stuff down? Well, yeah, collard greens like, but my mom would never, we never really had those. I don't know if she just didn't have a good collard greens recipe, but it was always beans. Just beans at my house. But lots of fried stuff, heavily salted stuff, mashed potatoes. Was your mom a good cook? She was a really good cook. Yeah. Yeah. She, one of, well, one of my, for a while in middle school or elementary school, up into middle school, like an acceptable breakfast at my house was

two chocolate pop tarts with butter on them. Wow. Like that was crazy. You got to eat breakfast before you go to school. And that was the breakfast. Were they frosted? Frosted chocolate frosted with butter. Try it. It's actually really good. It sounds great. Pop tarts with butter on them. It's so good. That's insane sounding. Yeah. One of our recent double episodes, we had Betsy Sedaro and we tasted a bunch of the modern pop tarts flavors like hot fudge sundae and the A&W root beer. Like they've gotten some crazy directions with them, but they were so sweet. And the idea that your palate would be adjusted to be like, Oh, this is just a regular breakfast because I had a similar sort of thing. I used to eat pop tarts at home, but I also like for

breakfast for a long time, I had cookie crisp cereal and that's like just like a cookie crisp cereal. Cookie crisp cereal. Yeah. Also by the way, they've changed cookie crisp mascots if you have been paying attention to their law. I haven't. They used to have the robber robber and the robber dog. Yeah. They're gone. They got a fucking wolf now. What? I have no idea. Yeah. I have no idea. Oh, cause like he's howling. Yeah. He's like howling. And probably they were also like, Oh, we don't want to be associated with a criminal element. Yeah. Was, was there a storyline that some of the cookie crisp was being stolen? Was that like, what was the scene for the robber and the robber? They were always trying to steal the

cookie crisp. That's right. And they're being foiled. And they're being foiled. What's wrong with that? The hamburgler is one of our greatest characters. He is. He's really, he's really up there. He's like in the pantheon of Western literature, the hamburgler is one of our greatest creations. There is a good character. Yeah. I prefer like a really small storyline to my food. Right. Just something tiny. Yeah. It's always like someone is trying, they're trying to obtain something and failing. That's such a big thing in children's like food marketing. The tricks rabbit. Yeah. Yeah. Why is that? I don't know. They want to be like, it's like the sensational craving, but you got to crave it the right way. We got to crave it responsibly. Like that's the

moral they're trying to, or they're trying to say that like, Oh, this is like, even this guy who really wants it, can't get it. So it's extra special when mom gets it for you. Exactly. Yeah. Silly rabbit tricks are for kids. I think it's like, Oh, well, kids get to eat everything, but like this isn't for anybody else. Right. I wrote a hamburgler parody song, you know, Rebel Rebel by David Bowie. I wrote Robble, Robble. It's very good. It's very good. You guys don't like it. I like it a lot. I love it. Robble, Robble. We can, we can assemble that one on around. I don't know. I don't remember the lyrics, but I'll find it somewhere. Here's my question. Why is it Robble, Robble and not burgled, burgle? Like, why did that become his catchphrase?

Robble. That because I think he's just like Robble, Robble. Like, I think he's just like a weirdo that just says Robble, Robble. But I thought because like Robble, like it's like sounds like Rob, right? Oh, Rob. Oh, that's why I was like Robble, Robble. Like he was a Rob, like he was the hamburger, but he robs. He wanted him to say burgle, burgle. Yeah, because there's a hamburger, he's a burglar. Yeah, he's a burglar. He burglers. And it's burgers. So he says burgle, burgle, and it's got the same effect of like a catchphrase, but it also kind of makes sense with his character. I think burgle, burgle just sounds so strange. Yeah, I guess it does sound kind of gross. Burgle, burgle. Yeah, it doesn't work. Hey, I have another thing. This is a,

this is a little bit of pedantry, which I love being pedantic. The, so people always get on and when people, someone says burglarized, they're like, Oh, why are you saying burglarized? The proper word is burgle. You know, the word burglarized actually predates the word burgle. Oh my, Nick, whoa. You'd like something like you were proving a point to us. Yeah. It's like some weird argument you had with like some screaming fight you had with Natalie. Look, that's like, yeah. No, that's like a, that's like a 10th grade English teacher thing to do is like, like burglarized, you mean burgle. It's like a correction they'll kind of give with like kind of a smug way, but you're actually wrong about that. Burglarized is the right word. Burgle is more modern. But the

question is you are actually wrong about that. Who is this you you're talking about? Yeah. Oh, it's, it's a straw man, Mitch. When people, um, like on social media will like, like they're kind of like, it seems to me like they're, they're showing off, but like my, like it's a picture of their friends and them on vacation. And it just says like, my friends and I on vacation, like they use my friends and I, that drives me nuts. Like, I don't know why I just like wish they would be like me and my friends on vacation, even though it's wrong. Yeah. They're like bragging or something. I get it. Yeah. It seems too formal. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I get that. My wife and I at dinner, you know what I say? Sure. Don't post those pics. Stop rubbing it in my fucking face.

Yeah. I sit here, Drew's, Drew's seen it. I sit here alone at Palmerston. I don't go anywhere. Yeah. I don't want to see your vacation rubbed in my face. You can go on a vacation, Mitch. You can see yourself. I think, I think like my parents' generation were of the mind of like, like, if you're going to go on vacation, like you gotta earn it. Right? And I'm like, I'm from a generation where like every dumb fuck I know goes on vacation. How come I can't go? I'm also, yeah. I'm also, I always surprise when people who I know, like in my kind of loose circle of acquaintances who I know have less money than me or less financially stable than me, in some cases that are financially struggling perhaps. And when I see them just like

on a vacation, on Instagram or whatever, I'm just like, what the, what is going on? Like, I don't feel like I could afford to take this trip that you're taking now. And I know that you were like mass emailing people to see if there was any improv coaching you could do for 60 bucks. You know what I mean? Like what like, I mean, you're saying this right now, but this is usually the comment you leave below the picture. Right? You verbally hate on people's vacations. You know, I'll tell you right now, I have some go to destinations I want to go to. Okay. I knocked Ireland out of the way. Oh, cool. But Weigern knows this, but I love like tropicalness. Like I want to go to like a tropical island.

You're a beach bum at heart. Like I just like lush tropical paradises. I want to walk. I like, you know, like the island and lost or something like the idea, like when they go to like the waterfall, like the little cove where there's like water and there's a waterfall, I want to go to like that little cove. Isn't that Kauai? Isn't that I think it is why I was Hawaii is on my on my list. I don't want to go to the lost island, but a place like lost. Yeah. So Hawaii, I want to go to Hawaii or like Fiji is the top five Alaska and I want to go to Germany for Oktoberfest. Oh, that's fun. It'll be fun. Those are my, those are my, I want to do those vacation spots before I die, which I won't. Drew, you have any fantasy destinations?

Well, I just went to Japan. Oh, that's a lot of new years, which was amazing. I wanted to go there for a while. And I spent a lot of it looking at clothes. Like I didn't even close shopping. Yeah. Well, like I would, I bought too many clothes. I like the style over there. Right. Yeah. And like for men's fashion, they've just got like a lot of cool stuff. And I spent like, like Betsy Siddharo, Mono Agapia and Casey Faye, Tony Charlene. We all went. That's a good group. It was very fun. That's true. And they went one day to the Lost in Translation Hotel and like saw all that and also like another part of town that we hadn't been to. And I was like, never, no, I'm going to department stores. But that was very exciting to me to go around and just

like, you know, go to these shops that have like really cool clothes. Yeah. That's, that is, that's very, very interesting. It was very weird. Like we didn't go to Kyoto, but I shopped a lot. And when you posted pictures, what'd you say? My friends and I in Japan? No, no, no. I tried not to. I've heard from people who I've heard from some people traveling to Japan, some Americans that there are some size issues, but you're a very slender man. So maybe you didn't have any trouble with that. Yeah, I was up to, you know that I would have a size issue. I wasn't kind of, I wasn't doing that, Mitch. Yes, you were. I wasn't. I try not to make fun. I don't think I'm sizest. I don't think I make fun of your size all that often because it used to be a big,

fat hog. I did. You know, I did. Yes. I used to be a heavier guy, but I try to have some, I empathize with, you know, people who are maybe having some, some body image issues, some weight issues or whatever. I'm not trying to make fun of you for that. There are lots of plenty of other reasons to make fun of you. It could make fun of your little eyes. It can make fun of your, what? I can make fun of your giant head. You know what? If I was in Japan, I bet you they'd like my big giant head, right? They would. A lot of times they, they, they like kind of weird, weird proportions and stuff like that. If you stood in front of a white wall, they'd be like, oh, it's the flag of our country. My face is that red. I think that we should go to Japan because I think

do boys, maybe like Mr. Baseball or something. We'd be really good right in Japan. I feel like the podcasting, you know, like I bet you there's not a lot of podcasters there. We could rise to the top pretty quick. I wonder if we have any Japanese listeners. We definitely do. Some people have sent stuff in. If you guys, they had, I was there for New Years and they have this thing that they do every New Years where it's like they get like the top seven or eight comedians from Japan and they film them for like two days straight, like doing these challenges that are like, I don't know. Like I can't even really, they're attempting to make each other laugh and anytime they laugh, this group of like military guys comes in and spanks them and like beats them.

Weiner, you would love this. It's crazy and so funny and apparently like these are like the biggest comics in Japan and they just beat the shit out of them. Anytime they laugh and that's how we should be treated here. Yeah. Like you guys should go there, get huge and then get beat up on this show. Sounds fun. But you know what? We can stay in the States and get beat up. Right, Weiger? Yeah. For our political beliefs and general dispositions. I was going to say if you're a Doughboys listener in Japan, hashtag Kyoto. Kyoto. Oh, Kyoto. Okay. That's good. I like that. That is good. You both looked at me like I was insane for a moment. I didn't hear the D. Oh, I thought at the first time Kyoto. Yeah, I just thought you said Kyoto and I got it.

And then I got it. True. I got a question for you. You said that you you had real have a real garbage palette. Yes. So I want to hear two things from you. I want to hear one. What were the places that you're eating down in the South down in Georgia? Then two, was it hard for you when you come here? You know how Hollywood is? Oh boy. Polar opposite. It's a polar. You got to go out. You got to eat some fancy dinner some nights. People love the food. It's a real it's a real it's become a very big food city, a foodie city. Yeah. In Georgia, I ate a lot of there was a hardies in my town. Okay. A lot of hardies and also a Dairy Queen. I ate a lot of Dairy Queen, but those were the two. We got a McDonald's when I was like 15 and

there was a line down the street for four like like a full month. It was it was like 15. It was packed with people constantly. That's like chaos when the McDonald's got also you're 15. So it's like it was weird for you to go in that ball pit. Yes, no, but I was in there. I was in there packed at me and all my buddies. Yes, but my I think my favorite thing. I don't know if you guys have had anyone mentioned this from like Southern Mexican restaurants have a cheese dip. Okay. So yes, the case. But it's like very milky. It sounds disgusting and maybe it is, but they don't have that out here. Right. I miss that. It's I don't know what the cheese is. I've never been able to find it or make it or it's not it's not it's not orange. It's white and it's like milky. Oh,

I know what you're talking about. Yeah, it's super watery. It sounds awful, but it is so good. Someone's gonna know that some cheese expert. Yeah, if you know what that cheese is, hashtag cheese mystery solved. That's I thought you were gonna say mouse life. Oh, that's good too. Hashtag mouse life. Mouse life is good. I did have a problem when I I lived in New York for three years before I moved here and I would go to know this. Yeah, I would go to Applebee's a lot was in my neighborhood and then like Chipotle. I just like I've got a big I can't eat salad. I've gotten better at it. It's hard for me to eat salad. Here's here's I was just sick. Yeah, 10 days or whatever. Whoa. Um, um, salad is hard to eat when you're sick. I don't want to eat salad when I'm

sick. Yeah, salad is that good salads are hard to come by. And then man, you just get that if I eat like salads and I do it like I'll like I'll do it. I'll do it for a week straight. I'll eat that like only salads for lunch and or dinner or whatever. And then you're just so burnt out on fucking salads. Yeah, right. You get so burnt on the salads and it's just it's it's it's hard. It's not it is not it's not easy. I feel you 100%. That's what I should be eating all the time. I will say that I kind of have the opposite. I can get into like a machine like rhythm of just having the exact same thing for breakfast and lunch like every day and then just mixing up for dinner. So for me, I can kind of be like I pretty much have the just a very similar breakfast every

day. But for like lunch, like I had a stretch where like a long own broken stretch was just having salad every day for lunch. And for me, it was just like, if I'm able to think of some meals as like, okay, fuck it, this is not going to be a fun meal. Psychologically, for whatever reason, I can just like endure having a salad just for that, you know, like, oh, this isn't going to be fun for me. This is just going to be some nutrition that I need. And I'm able to do it in kind of a healthy way. But yeah, it is it is tough because you have to kind of numb yourself to it. And if you have a pleasurable response for food, especially if you have like a job that like is a bummer and lunches your escape from it. It's it's it's stuff to deal with. Are you

with anyone because everyone doesn't want to go to a salad place ever. But I think they're enough. I think most places you go to now have a salad like even if you go to a barbecue restaurant, they're going to have like a chicken. Some of those are like like if I get like if you go to a place that like it's like one of those like con salad places that's like we got a salad on the menu, but it's like shredded lettuce from like their burger and oh yeah, then I'll be so mad when I get some black ass salad. Yeah, it's fucking it's awful. I'm so ignorant to salads. Where do you like do I've seen this place sweet greens? Do you go there or do you go to 10 like tender greens or I'm tender greens, sweet greens as far as the as far as the kind of the LA local salad. Yeah,

green leaf. These are these are the big salad ones. Sweet green is nationwide though actually. I think it started in DC. Yeah, it was in New York first. Yeah, I've actually I shifted. I used to be a more of a tender greens man than a sweet greens man. I flipped. In fact, I lowered my rating of tender greens and sweet green which I gave four forks. I'm gonna canonically up it right now. I go all the time with my lovely wife Natalie. We have a great great time. They have great salads, great bowls, five forks for sweet green. Jesus. Wow. You save this for your own podcast or something. Who gives a shit? And what do you categorize this? I don't know like I I know dressings obviously, but like things are big. Yeah, like some people are just like oh no, I just throw a

little lemon juice and little olive oil like like I don't know what to do. What goes with what dressing what type of salad like I get really scared when the when the dressing choice. Well, I would say you can just real quick. I would say that you can always go with their prefab selections and a lot of these places will just have like a prefab dress salad with a prefab chosen dressing. And if you just follow their guidelines, let them hold your hand a little bit. You'll say 10 degrees never gives you enough dressing. That's absolutely true. But go ahead, Mitch. What are you gonna say? I was just gonna say that for the longest time, like it was like so many people are like the salads of these places like you get the dressing and it's just as bad as getting like a cheeseburger. Yeah,

it's not really true. Not at all. It's not even close to true. Get a salad and put ranch dressing on right who cares. Yeah, eat the salad way better than anything way, way better. Way better than Carl's Jr. Hardy's burger. Yes, I yeah, because I just I am a man who likes a cream based dressing. I'll get a little ranch. I'll get a little blue cheese and I just I will just do it sometimes because like I know that there's a healthier choice to be made. But just like even though this is a little bit of additional calories for me, this makes this lets me endure this salad. And this is means means I'm more likely to eat a salad than I would be then to bail on it. You know, we're talking small, small. It's not big, big differences. Not a huge difference. Yeah.

And are we what do you guys think? Base wise, do you go mixed greens or do you have spinach or do you go romaine? Like what are you? I look like a mixed green usually. Like, of course, if you get a Caesar, you got to get that romaine. So I really like a just a like a mescaline, just sort of like that mescaline greens mix, you know, it's just sort of like an assorted bunch. I don't even know what the fuck it is. But it's just like that, just kind of that generic salad thing that's very leafy, also like like a green leaf lettuce. Romaine is I don't know. I mean, it's it's better for you than iceberg. But I feel like it's just like the Christmas down to iceberg. Yeah, iceberg is iceberg is lowest. Well, that's what I grew up with was just like

at church, you would on the side get like four or five pieces of like yellow to white iceberg, a little bit of ranch and then like one shitty tomato. And this this this is salad. So I was always like this is like gross. I have a I have a place in my heart for salads like that as side salads. Right. If I'm having it in addition to a meal, I'm okay with it. But if the salad is the base of the meal, I need like a mixed greens and I can't do iceberg is I can't do iceberg. And I need some type of like crostini or like some some sort of bread. Yes, some sort of something or I guess I feel the same way, even though I'm not supposed to feel the same way. And I if you can admit the croutons, it does go a long way. Yeah, I would say sometimes you can because

sometimes what the reason the crouton that you want it there is just more for a textural element. And I would say throw in some seeds, throw in some nuts, you know, throw in some seeds. Yeah, you know, some pine nuts, some sunflower seeds go to my cabinet, open it up and pull out some seeds. Look, you can stock up on these things. I don't mean like the kind of seat like you would till the earth and you would plant these seeds and then a grove would grow. I'm talking about the kinds of edible seeds that are in a lot of our foods. Yeah, no, I know. I don't think it's outlandish to say put seeds in a salad. If you go to a salad bar, a lot of times there's seeds there with the nuts and shit. Okay, fine. Croutons. Yes. Throw in some,

forget why I said seeds. Throw in something that's crunchy, that's not croutons. And you can get a similar sort of effect and save yourself some calories and carbs. I don't even know how this fight started. You were both on the same page and then you called it. He went on and to say throw in some seeds. It's a reasonable thing to say. No, it's not. Throw in anything crunchy. Fine. I'll throw some bugs in your salad. How's that? I don't want any bugs in my salad. Enjoy your fucking bug-filled salad, you piece of shit. People don't eat bugs regularly and certainly not in the Western world. So yeah, that's an outlandish thing to say. All right, enjoy your spider salad. Yeah, right. Like you're saying like, I see what you're saying. You're talking about like

you're going to throw in some gravel or let's throw in some scrap metal. I get what you're saying. I get the game of what you're doing right now. But we know what edible foods, like what things that are edible, we know what things people put in salads. So you can glean from that when they say put something crunchy in that I'm talking about. I love your clinical breakdown. I know the game you're playing right now. True. We got to touch on this before we, because we got to get into, we got to get into Marrone. We got to get into the restaurant. Oh, Mama Mia. We got to get into the restaurant. And Nick and I are saying Marrone and Mama Mia intentionally. Right. We'll find out in a second. Yes. Even though you already know,

we're reviewing Jersey Bikes. You've read the description. You read the description on the episode. We don't keep these secrets. True. You are Carl's Jr. That's true. You are Carl's, you are him himself. Yeah, I am. Despite the chain being called Carl's Jr. I am Carl Jr. You are Carl Jr. Yeah. Yeah. I play in the, in the Carl's Jr. commercials or Carl's Jr. Slash Hardy's Carl Jr. Who was responsible for all of the filthy ads. Right. Yeah. So we want an explanation. What were you thinking with these filthy ads? I mean, I was just, my daddy was away and boys will play. They're really funny spots. They're really good. And I feel like it's also to, it's such a refreshing, refreshing break from where that, what their

marketing was, which is just, you know, like, I kind of like just kind of known for one thing. And this is like a fun way to address it. But also here's the thing I like that I think has been talked about less. They have united the Carl and Hardy's brands by making it Carl Hardy, Sr. and Carl Hardy Jr. We now have justified how Y one chain east of the Mississippi is named one thing and one chain west of the Mississippi is named the other, even though they share the same menu and business model. Yeah. Carl Hardy. It's it's all because of one man. It's a very, very good campaign. And they are and they're lucky to have Drew was a great, great actor and a very, very funny man. Thank you. Thanks. I'm very excited when I auditioned for it. I, I in the room,

I was like, this was before the initial audition before the clients or anybody was there. I was like, are they, they can do this? This is like actually kind of funny. And they're like kind of trashing their old, they won't end up doing this, right? And they did, which is I thought really cool. And I think it's yeah, because I didn't know of Carl's Jr. at all. Like I had the hardies. But you're a big Hardy's fan, huge Hardy's fan, huge Hardy's breakfast fan, which I still am, which you can get the good biscuits out here at the Carl's Jr. slash green burritos. They have the like biscuits before 10 30, which are my favorite biscuits. I mean, they're bad for you, right bad, but they're so good, which is right down here on if you on Los Fields Boulevard,

if you go that way, there is a green burrito Carl's Jr. There is. Yes. I've been to that one before 10 30 many times being at Carl's Jr. before 10 30 is inherently depressing. Yeah. It's there's not anybody in that driver. It's it's strange. Right. It's a very different scene than like at 2am or whatever when it's back. Well, we should have had you on. We revisit Carl's Jr. But you know what, maybe I think we can give hardies in another review at some point. So we'll have you on for that because we've never officially gone to a hardies labeled restaurant. Right. Right. There's a lot of regional chains we need to touch on. That's one of them. Let's fly to Mississippi together. We'll go on the road at some point, but we we basically we read it. We

did our second review Carl's Jr. As we were doing it, we were like, oh, we should have had Drew. This happens all the time on the podcast. You actually said that to Chris Van Artsdale and our guests. He was like, what the fuck? Yeah, it's true. It's true. And then I think that I got him to come around. I think he agreed. Yes. But we do that all the time. We were like, we we promised things to people and then right. We were telling Howard Kramer that he should do coffee bean and you and I both knew that we had already recorded a coffee bean. Yeah, we just were too scared to say that we had right at the moment. Like, oh, yeah. Yeah. Well, that'd be great. Yeah. We're recording that on a podcast that we knew people were going to listen like lying,

knowing this lie was going to be documented and immediately proven. Yes. Yeah. That we were lying because that lie will and we'll get talked about on Reddit. Right. Sure. Like they're lying here, right? Yeah. We we but I think it's a testament to why we do this together, Nick. We are like pathetic men who are so scared. Sure. That will lie public like like will stand in front of people and just not tell the truth because we're so scared. We'll tell them what we want them to hear so we don't have to endure one second of disapproval from anyone. Absolutely. And then also too, you and I can yell at each other knowing that we're both too cowardly to ever come to blows. So this is just a way we can expand all that energy one day. I'm going to beat you. I'm hoping

for it. I'm hoping that's how I go. God, you freak. Drew, you recorded, you recorded, you filmed one of the the the Carl spots at right next door to where we actually usually record chili johns, chili johns, a place that it's a it's a it's a valley staple. Yes. I had read about this place. I was like, Oh, I need to go there. And I never end up going. I drove by a couple of times. And yeah, we ended up filming there. It's a really like really like cool little spot. Yes. It's it's great. It's great. Also, if you ever get a chance to eat there, the food, Nick, the food is great, right? It's great chili. It's a it's renowned with good reason. It's endured for a long I'm like, I don't know. I don't know. Why did I decide to lie? You decide to lie to me.

Yeah. I don't like to impress by saying I've been to chili johns. I've never been. Yeah, I've never been. Oh, it's great. Yeah, I've heard it's great. It's right next door to where we record it up at Ferrell. Yeah. Also, it's right across from a bar rescue bar. That's right. Champs is right there. Yeah. Taffer rescue champs and it's still going strong. That was like a season one rescue. Things are happening on that. That's a good, is that Burbank Boulevard? I think it is. Yes, it is. It is Burbank Boulevard. Yeah. Things are hopping on Burbank Boulevard. Maybe the three of us will sell the show Burbank Boulevard. Yeah, it's funny that when we filmed that you very quick to dismiss why? Why is that? Is that because you're on the rise and you don't want to be

brought down by two guys who will? I didn't give Burbank Boulevard. It's time. I don't know. You're right to not attach yourself to it. You don't need 450 pounds of dead weight. Yeah. All right. Yeah, probably. Maybe more. Go ahead, Drew. No, no, no. I thought that was, I don't, I don't, I didn't like that I did that because I thought of something that was interesting about filming that commercial and then I stopped listening to what you were saying. That we, I want to hear that. I don't know. I want this anecdote more than anything. Please. The when we filmed that commercial, the guy who plays the person I, which I don't know why this commercial is like the conceit of it is we steal a recipe and run off. Yeah, you

steal the which goes back to what we were saying with tricks and yeah children, serials. You guys are up to. There's mischief going on. If we steal this man's recipe and it's like now at Carl's Jr. from this idiot, but I think they also got that recipe from someone on Shark Tank. Maybe the rib thing was there. Is that true? I yeah. Some of our listeners were telling us apparently that was a Shark Tank product, a way to take the ribs out of baby back ribs and keep the rib meat intact. Right. Yes. Okay. Did Carl's get it from that? Yeah. It's the same thing. It's the same but did they actually buy it from that man? It's the same supplier. Yeah. Oh, that's great. Yeah. So maybe that's an homage to that. I don't know what it was, but the guy who is in the back

like saying like, oh, we should put ribs on a burger that we over here. He during filming, he like came and we said, uh, nice to meet you. I'm Wes and he's like, I'm actually from Georgia too. And I said, oh, really? What part expecting him to say Atlanta or whatever? And he was like Reedsville, which is like eight miles from my hometown. We know so many of the, he's 10 years older than me, but I know like he grew up across the street from this church that I used to like, I hated the family that ran this church. So me and my friends would go shoot circles in the parking lot of this church. Oh, wait, shoot circles? Like we're like burnout, like do donuts. Oh, donuts. Yeah. Yeah. Shoot circles. Shoot circles. That's cool. Yeah. That's such a southern beef

and such a southern way to carry out that beef. Yeah. Absolutely. We didn't have a family that owned that church. So he shot circles in their parking lot. And they had a pitchfork over the head and they were raising it in the air. I think it was more towards God or Jesus than it was to this family. They were just, you know, a host of all these rules that we didn't like. So anyway, I thought that was never had I met someone that grew up that close to me in Georgia and we were on the same commercial. It was crazy. That's very cool. Wes Robertson is his name. He's a nice guy. He plays a man covered in rib sauce, a room covered in rib sauce. Yes. Yeah. No, I and you know what? We talked about that the rib burger on the on that episode and it

was great. It was good. We both liked it. I did like it. I thought that it was missing cheese. Yeah. I think I prefer the western bacon cheese here. I'm not going to lie. I prefer the western bacon cheeseburger from Carl's Jr. That's fine. So I think it's a it's a pretty good execution of the kitchen. I'm very happy for that shark tank man. He was very nice. I don't know if you know shark tank man. Yeah. Do they still have that sourdough burger? The one with the sourdough bread? That one was my favorite. So sourdough. There's a sourdough jacket jack in the box. Yeah. Okay. But but but but Carl's does do a sourdough thing every so often. Yeah. I don't think it's a special burger. It's a regular part of their menu. Also, the sourdough jack, the bread is not

as good anymore. It's really gone down. And they I think Carl's like doesn't freeze any of their vegetables ever and also like the meat. They they're one of the only chains that uses real ice cream in their shakes. That's true. That is right. We talked about their right. We tried to give them a hard time and we gave them a good review again. We were where the rubes. Yeah. Carl's hearties is great. But hey, Marrone. Hey, we'll get to we'll get to that one. We'll get to that in one second, Mitch. Oh, I just just want to let everyone know who might be suspecting that because of our positivity of with Carl's Junior, with a somewhat an actor from Carl's Junior commercial, this might be branded content. But reminder, the dough boys can't be bought.

We'll take a quick break for these commercials. And also, Drew, if you're trying to have the dough boys be bought, why are you and I will take you out from what curb stomp your ass? How's that? Or you know, better yet, we'll shoot circles in front of your apartment. There you go. Curse it, God. I will do it. We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back with more dough boys. This episode of dough boys is brought to you by Fulton and Rourke. Fulton and Rourke is a men's fragrance and grooming company that specializes in solid colognes, shave and shower products, all designed to make getting ready easier and more enjoyable. Their travel friendly, wax based colognes go anywhere. Plus, there's nothing to break or spill. And of course,

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get 20% off your first pair. That's DSTLD.com. Go right now. Five letters DSTLD.com. Welcome back to Doughboys sitting here with Drew Tarver. Jersey Mike's. Yes. Maroon. Maroon. Mamma Mia. Mamma Mia. Hey, what? You're some sort of. Florence. So, Sicily. Oh, Venice. Venicio. Mamma Mia is a city, right? Yeah, Mamma Mia is one of the cities. Mamma Mia is the, I believe the capital of, you know, right. And the president is meatball. Just a meatball. Yeah, a meatball. A hovering meatball. I went to Italy when I was a boy whiter. No, it had gone. I went here. No, I just, I went there when I was in ninth grade. When I went to Theracademy, my parents sent me to Theracademy for one year because I was a

little troublemaker. Oh boy. To straighten me out. And so I went to Theracademy. I went to, yeah, I went to Italy and I remember the food being great, but it's like one. It was like the last trip where like I don't, I was just like, oh, I was just young enough that I don't remember like it was useless. Right. They shouldn't have sent me there. I should have stayed at home and like looked at the wall because it was there. There were no memories from it. I don't remember anything. I saw the, the, the Sistine Chapel and I don't know. I don't remember. It was a chat. I don't know. I was in there, but I don't. There was no, I haven't, it has no place in my heart or anything. Yeah. And I said, you know, at Vatican city, but none of it, none of it mattered. Right.

But, uh, but, uh, but I love Italian food is my favorite food and I am big on sub sandwiches. The East Coast, Nick, I say this all the time. I, I, there's so many more sub shops and you can get so many good sub sandwiches. Is that what, that's what you call it in the East Coast. You call it a submarine. Yeah. A sub, a sub because I know in region, different regions, it has different. They would, what do you call it down south? I think we would just call it a sandwich. You call it a sandwich. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We would never say sub. There's hoagies. There's grinders. There's a hoagies and grinders. There's a lot of a, is it just that? Is it hoagies, grinders and submarines? Is there another one? Hoagies, grinders, submarines, heroes. Heroes.

That's the other one. Heroes is the other one. Um, but, uh, but, but I love a good sub sandwich shop. Right. Drew, what made you want to go to Jersey? Mike's? Well, I was, I had assumed you guys had done it like just because like, I don't know. I, I really like it. I go there. It's the only sub sandwich that I haven't gotten like sick of. Interesting. And I eat it probably two to three times a week. Wow. Which is maybe too much. I'm going to say right now. Yeah. Yeah. That's too much. That's too much. I, I recently went, I started going so much that I went from a regular down to a mini. I was like, you don't need, even though like a mini is pretty small, but it's still like pretty substantial. Yeah. Just because I would go so often. I'm going to be

embarrassed when we tell a lot of our orders later, but go on. Um, and, uh, I, it's right next to, or it's like really close to my house. I can walk to it. It's maybe like in the worst location. It's like in like a Ralph's like sort of like a Ralph strip mall. Like it's a bad sort of, it doesn't have a good vibe. The mind that I go to, have you, did you go to that one? Is this the one over this way and on Western is, Oh no, no, I did not go to that one. I got mine delivered. Okay. But uh, I got it from, uh, the, from over in like at water. Okay. Yes. Going, going, going East. Yeah. Okay. And you have just like a, you have just like a red button that summons a Jersey Mike sandwich to your door, right? Yes. I have a red button and I push it in Jersey. Mike's comes to

my door and then you throw fucking seeds on it. Um, yeah, I eat it three times a week, probably. So I was like, Oh, this is the thing I maybe eat the most. Yeah. I should do this because we've talked about how forever I did subway because it feels like, Oh, this is like it's not, it's bread, a lot of bread, but it feels like so much better than going and getting a burger. Right. Yes. It's just like, Oh, I'm getting a turkey sandwich. It's good. Which I think your order is, if I'm, correct me if I'm mistaken, is it the turkey? Is the turkey? Yeah. It's the number seven, usually regular on wheat, Mike's way. And it's my attempt to be like, Oh, there's some lettuce in this. I don't have to eat a salad. Like it is. Yeah. And, and subways I find like I had a sub,

we got a subway in my town and it calls chaos again. Like everybody was there. Right. And I really liked the subway in my town was like really nice, but like subways in New York and LA, like I got a question. Was it confusing? Cause people thought it was like the like the transportation system. Yes. Yeah. And so they were going in there like ready for work. Yeah. The MTA would show up all the time at subways and be like, all right, let's get this train working. And they'd be like, guys, we're baking bread. It's very, it was very funny in New York for a while. Oh, this is New York. Oh, you're talking about the one in my town. Yeah. I was, I was, I was giving a hard time to Georgia. Oh yes. No, stupid Georgia people. Yeah. Absolutely.

Oh, this is where the trains come and finally it's got to stop here. Yes. I'll make fun of anybody from anywhere. Um, well, Quincy has its downsides. Sure. What, what, Weigar? What do you have to say? I don't have anything to say. Quincy is a lovely town. Why don't you turn into the Cheshire, Cheshire cat? I don't just know. It's, Quincy is great. You and all your friends, you and Chankton and frail bot and go bot and little Steve and Jersey Mike and fatty and big fatty. I'm happy. I'm neither of those. Continue on, Drew. But I feel like sub, I liked the subway in my town, but when I got to like LA, like the subways in more highly populated areas are just dirtier and like don't,

they don't get taken care of very well. They're maybe like open to like midnight. So like it gets just rough in there. You know what I call that? I call that the seven 11 effect. Yes. Because that's the most apparent with the seven 11 in a busy area that it's just, it's like, like it's like the bottom of your shoe. It's like, it's like, yes. Like if you walk in the seven 11 parking lot right here on most feelers, it's like just like drinks, like old like people must. Why are you must? You must go there a lot because I feel like it's just people spilling their, their drinks on the way out. Like I feel like there's big gulp stains. Like there's like a small fire in the back corner. Like it's just chaos in there. Right. Yes. In Japan, the seven

11's I went in once we had one right below our Airbnb and we would stop every night. Like it like two a.m. on the way home. They would, they would be like cleaning little spots off of the floor down on their hands and knees. Like it was the cleanest. That's crazy. The best. It was so nice guy. And you know what? This is where it really rubs me the wrong way in other countries. They take care of their restrooms. Yeah. United States. We don't care about our restrooms and that is like the most frustrating thing on earth. Well, yeah. To go, to go into a toilet stall and like there's carvings on the seat and there's just like people just are like whatever and they'll just throw toilet paper against the wall. It's fucking disgusting. Yeah. There's an

American instinct to see if you can break something like just like, oh, this thing's here. I'm gonna fuck with that. You know, and you can't. It is. Yeah. It's a, but it's also too. I think there's probably, I think a lot of these establishments are understaffed because they're American companies trying to cut costs on labor and so they don't have as many people as they need to. I mean, I've known people who work in restaurants and they're like, they have to do everything. Like they, they, you know, they have to, they have to work as a host and they also have to run food and they also have to clean the bathroom. You know what I mean? It's just like all these tasks that maybe should be portioned out to portioned out to some more people. God, you gotta make us feel

bad about it. No, but I'm just, but I'm saying though, I do think, I do think you have a point of there is an American instinct to fuck with things and to ruin things and to kind of put our stamp on things. And Subway is definitely, it has that 7-11 effect. Yeah. Yeah. So that's why I kind of like, I got, I was done with Subway and I started seeking out a new sandwich and I found Jersey Mike's and I normally like, I had never even had, cause I would just go get a baloney sandwich from Subway as like, that was like my order. Wow. Like I'm always trashy. I didn't even know they had that. They had, like, I don't think they have them anymore, but they used to have this kids meal that was just two pieces of bread, two pieces of baloney and mayonnaise. And that

would be like, I'd be like, yeah, I'm just eat, go and get, go and get some Subway. And that was my order. True. I've never asked you your age, but are you a tween? No, I eat like, like a fucking 12 year old. Like it'll just be like two cheese slices, white bread, and then like hot dogs slices. I mean, that is good. There's a reason you like that. It's delicious. You get a positive response from that. And it also too, it seems because, because you are a very slender man and it seems to hold on. Yes. He I just want to make sure that people know he is not the slender man. You're not slow. Don't be scared. Initially, what everyone thought because this is very much the slender man's voice. Like right. Our voices are very similar. He's kind of so there. If news

got out that you are the slender man, like won't like a bunch of like to bring up tweens again, want a bunch of tween girls, like come and kill him. Like, yeah, so much weird shit that goes on with slender man. They don't want to kill slender man. They want to kill others to impress slender man. That's right. They like your power. That's true. Like a bullet advantage. Right. Like a bullied classmate would like get knifed. Well, yeah. Well, I'm not slender man, but I do have a gang of tween girls that kill people for me. Oh, David Christensen. You shouldn't have fucked up this Luigi Mansion game. He's not the slender man, but you are a slender man. But it seems to me because this is a thing we talked about with Paul Rest, who has a similar like just eats a lot of

Arby's eats a lot of fast food, but it's a very slim man. It sounds like you have good portion control. If you're getting a lot of kids meals and stuff, or you're getting the mini from Jersey Mike's, it's like maybe you're eating a food that's ostensibly bad for you, but you're not eating a lot of it. Right. Yeah. I do eat. I do eat small way smaller portions. I really love to like you want to go like, does anybody want to split something? I just don't like, I don't like feeling super, super full. Wow. Okay. And I really like can't, once I fill up, which is not that much food, I can't eat much more. So I take a lot of, well, I take leftovers home a lot and of course leave them in my car and stink up my car. I've never successfully brought in leftovers into the

house. Leftovers are usually for me, I got to eat them the next day or they're done. Yeah. I'm one and done one day and done. Yeah. With leftover. If it's two days with leftovers, I don't, I don't, I don't like them anymore. The other day, I got, you guys know Bonitos out here. So it's a taco shop with a few different locations. Yes. But it's a good sort of, I'm calling it trashy to, it's not trashy, like low quality food, but that's the kind of like, you know, food it feels like it's like kind of like satisfies that sort of, you know, I want something that's very heavy and, and you know, has a lot of cheese or whatever. So I got some, some taquitos from there. And I got like an order of five taquitos, like super late at night and eight, like three of them,

and I was full and I put two in the fridge. And then I left them in the fridge, like all week. And then like yesterday morning, I took them out and it would, they were covered with guacamole and they were just like, it was just like brown, like dark brown. Yeah. But I still ate them. No. And I just, what the fuck? And they were great. They were so good. I just, I ate these cold taquitos with the brown guacamole and they were delicious. Now you bring up a point that usually why I only do one day and done is because usually if I have leftovers to them, it's like, oh, I should be eating something better for me than what, like, like just, just nutritional value wise. I shouldn't be eating these anyways. So after that one day, I'm like, now I'm not getting like

the benefit of this tasting that great and it's also not good for me. So why am I doing this? But also I'm a monster and I don't eat brown guacamole. That's fucking disgusting. Was it at least green underneath the initial layer of like oxidized sort of brown? Okay. Right. If you dug through that, you kind of like a seven layer dip. If you dug through that, it'd get to a different color. So wait, so let's talk, let's talk about, let's move past that. Let's talk about Jersey Mike's a little bit. Okay. So what did you get on your, do you have the turkey sandwich in your regular visit? Is that what you got in your most recent visit as well? That is, that's what I've, I honestly never had anything else. You just don't deviate. I don't deviate. That's very, very

funny. Yeah. Like I have never, I see all of it. Like I've seen people, my friend John Mackie has ordered the, the Philly cheesesteak. Sure. And he said that was good, but I don't deviate from this. I get it. Usually a number seven regular on wheat with no tomato and turkey breast and provolone. It's like, yes. And I get it. A classic turkey and provolone classic, a classic combo classic. Yeah. Mike's and you get at Mike's way. I get it. Mike's way with no tomato and there's some sort of like Mike's way involves oil and vinegar, some sort of seasoning and I think salt and pepper. Yeah. Right. Onions, lettuce, tomato, spices, and undefined spices, and the juice, which is red wine, vinegar, and olive oil.

Yes. Here, here. And you know what? I mean, we also should talk about just the Italian-ness of this place. I love Italian, like I was saying, I love Italian, Italian food is probably my favorite food. I grew up on a street. Hey, with the two foes, a big Italian family with the Bellottis or their grandparents next door. My friend, Justin Kiley, I think is half, if not more, Justin, I don't know. But like these Italian families, I love Italian food, great Italian food growing up. But I also think that like Long Island, like Jersey, like Italian things are, it's a very funny, right? It is like Mike's way. Like everything about it is very, very funny to me. Yeah. The idea of like trying to make the Jersey shore seem like an

awesome destination is really great. And I don't mean to talk trash about it, but like Georgia has its own trashy seaside and like Daytona Beach, that whole vibe, like the idea of making that into like a, isn't this awesome? It's very funny. It's also like that sort of thing of like Mike, like it's a funny thing to have at like a sandwich shop or a food shop. It's like, well, I don't know who kids forget about it. I kind of do care, right? And I do want my sandwich to be right. Oh, you want toppings? You're not getting them. Get out of here. But that's such a funny, that's like such a, to make that like a, this is your brand, right? Is this, is this, is this a Jersey forget about it kind of guy is very funny to me. Well, I mentioned the sopranos in my intro,

and I think that I honestly do suspect that part of the Nick, you know what, we didn't know that because you don't read your intros. I was going to read it. I'm going to read it after we're done recording. So we don't have to keep our guest here for longer. It doesn't help us. It doesn't form the podcast for us. All right. Well, that just a little bit of context for you. I talked about the sopranos in my intro, people listening to this already know this, but I do, I do think that the, the rise in relevance of someplace like Jersey Mike's and just like the rise in awareness of Jersey is a thing in general does owe something to the sopranos because that happened in the early 2000s, those big sensation, Jersey Shore followed on in its wake and just sort of

the idea of like Jersey as a thing. People knew about it in the US, but they kind of also thought of like Jersey is just sort of like, Oh, whatever, that's that kind of shitty state. The idea of like kind of Jersey having its own character. And certainly the Jersey Shore specifically, I feel like a lot of that came, a lot of that came about the after the turn of the century, I feel like. Yeah. After sopranos, you're saying, right? You know what I heard on that last episode of sopranos, you know how it goes black? Yeah. I heard that actually in the extended cut, Tony gets up and says, this place sucks. Let's go to Jersey Mike's and they go to Jersey Mike's. Yeah. Right. He doesn't die. He doesn't get killed. I heard that too. Right. And he says,

AJ, you're in charge now and then AJ runs the family. Yeah. And then, but then they had to change it because they like HBO was like, we don't want, this is like branded content. We don't want branded content on network. We're not an ad supported platform. And so they were, so David James was like, well, fuck it. I don't know what to do. And so he just like cut the scene off right then. Yeah. Yeah. I can't believe we've all heard this exact same stuff. Hey, we're Hollywood guys. And I don't like that. I don't like the black ending as much. I like, I like, I like the Jersey Mike's. Oh yeah. Right. When they're all kind of screaming about what are in the, what are in these spices? Right. What are they exactly? Yeah. They walk away. The juice. What's the juice?

What, how, how, what makes up the juice? I heard it's just red wine and vinegar. Red wine and vinegar. What is, is red wine, is red wine vinegar, is it, is it, is it actual red wine? Yeah, it's made from red wine, right? It is. Because vinegar is made, I think vinegar, I think wine turns into vinegar if aged enough. That's what it is. Yeah. So I think red wine vinegar is actually made from red wine. And the, and the, the, because vinegar has no calories, right? Yeah. It's generally is calorically like negligent food. Yeah. Oh, interesting. So that does come from actual red wine. Yeah. That's crazy to me. Right. Do you think my Tony's

soprano impressions good? Yeah. I think it's really, I mean, I actually, I just got an email that they're rebooting the Sopranos with you as the lead. So congrats. Wow. This hasn't even been posted either. Right. No, there's just enough buzz on social media that you were doing a Sopranos impression on Doughboys and it was really good. I also did for real like the Sopranos ending and I was, I was out here. This is how long I've been out here now. I was here for the Sopranos ending and I remember I got a place like on Craigslist and that I lived for, for a long time on Citrus Ave and my roommate, this guy, we should bleep that. I shouldn't say his name, believe it. A guy who at one point spent all

of our sparklets money for his own, for his own gambling that's fucked up, is fucked up. And then he tried to trick us and he filled the sparklets bottle up with the hose in the backyard. Wow. And I was like going and getting sparklets one day and I like saw like grass floating in it and I was like, this is like from somewhere and then like my other roommate was like, I think he was filling it up from the hose in the backyard. Jesus Christ. What a monster Sopranos. So the Sopranos ending happened. He's like, what happened? That's fucking bullshit. And he like hated the Sopranos ending. Dumb guys were very mad. Dumb guys were so mad at the Sopranos ending and I loved the Sopranos ending. Some smart guys were mad about it and some dumb

guys liked it to be fair. Yeah. Drew, were you a Sopranos? Wait, were you saying that because of me? Yeah, no. Drew, were you a Sopranos viewer? I didn't watch the Sopranos. Drew, you got to watch it. I know. I have to watch it. I know. But at this point, I mean, you're not gonna. I mean, come on. I don't think I am, honestly. It's so, it's so much TV. It's so much. Let's be realistic. You should watch it. I think it's a really good show. I think it's fine if you watch it, but I think it's completely understandable if you don't watch it. It's just so much TV. Yeah, it's a lot of TV and I want to, if somebody like wants to do it with me, I'll do it. I can't do it by myself. If you're out there, any listeners, hashtag, I'll watch with Drew. Yes. Yeah,

watch it with Drew and then you guys can team up for a new howl.fm podcast. Yes, absolutely. Hey, you know, I give you out there. If you were a fan of the the way the Sopranos ended hashtag so pre yes. And if you didn't like the way the Sopranos ended hashtag so pre hell knows why you just say Sopran knows because the hashtag Sopranos will just be like for regular when you said it Sopran yes and then you put up your finger. You put up a finger to drew an eye a one. Yeah, telling us to like hold on a second like wait for it. Yeah, and then and then the prestige. Should we talk about what we got? Yeah, yeah, I got the regular number two number 12 king crow special named after the king crow one of the guy the guy who expanded the business

Peter king crow and this one is prof alone roast beef and pepperoni. I also got it Mike's way okay. Good sandwich. I like the what do you think of the bread at Jersey Mike's I think it's pretty good. Honestly solid bread. I like I said I really like the Angelo's on the on the on the east coast. You know, I drew I thought you're gonna take more. Now Weigar's got a huge piece here. I'll give this I'll take a little piece and I'll explain what's going on right now in a second. I like the bread. I feel like the bread is moist. It's nice and soft. Subway bread is usually a little bit harder. This feels like this feels more bread to me. It feels doughy and I enjoy it right. I feel like I got the Chipotle cheese steak.

So I got yeah. I got the Chipotle cheese steak beef Chipotle cheese steak. I got the giant size because I was just going to save it for later. Yeah, I didn't. I ate a giant Chipotle cheese steak, right? Probably 5000 calories. I was coming off being sick. I want to trash food, whatever. Yeah, no shit. Yeah, it's fine. I got judging you a bag of cool ranch trios. Here's here's what I'll say in a mountain do like I want nuts. I want like teenager nuts and I got a cookie which we have we have saved till now because I probably would have died if I ate it with that meal. A chocolate chip cookie. Weigar, you didn't get a cookie and drew you usually do get the cookies and they were all out and they were all out today. I'm about to take a bite of it. I'd

never had the cookie. As you were talking there, you covertly distributed cookie bites to me and drew. I never had and I'd say that's pretty damn good. It's soft and delicious. It's a pretty good cookie like I don't know if it's better than Subway's chocolate chip cookie. That is very that's one of my favorite chocolate chip cookies is Subway's but I will eat that cookie the Jersey Mike's chocolate chip cookie in the same bite as my sandwich. Wait, what? Yes. Like you put them on top of each other. It's so weird but I love I'll take one bite of the sandwich and then I'll take a bite of the cookie. Okay. And I stretch the cookie out with the sandwich. That's crazy. It's very weird but it tastes so good. You're like a turkey provolone chocolate chip chocolate chip

cookie sandwich. And I also get the barbecue the Miss Vicki's barbecue chips and I eat those like usually once I swallow the cookie sandwich I'm eating. I'll eat the chips kind of like after that and I'll alternate. That's bananas. It's so crazy. It tastes so good though if you try the cookie with the sandwich. I don't know something about like the true. We had a lot of respect for you. Yeah you guys are slowly walking out. I'm like I'm very opposite from you in that regard. I'm someone who will finish all of one thing and then move on to the next. Like I'm kind of almost regimented the way. That's so strange. My friend John eats like that and it makes no sense to me like finishing the portions. I kind of finished too. You do. So you'll get like if you

got like a steak with fries and like I don't I don't know. You know what you're wrong. Would you eat the steak and then the fries. I do. I'll mix it up. Okay. But if I had it here but maybe steak freeze I might mix it up because I like to do a little dip in and I like you know that's like a unique situation. But if you were going to give me like a steak some broccolini and maybe a little rice pilaf. Yes. I'm going in reverse order of what I like the most. So I'm gonna I'll probably take down that that that broccolini then I'll go to that pilaf and then I'll finish off with a steak. Oh okay. Yeah. I need like a little break in between each ones but I totally understand that eat the thing I like the least first. Yeah. Get it out of the way. I would never mix dessert

with main course. Yeah that's crazy. That's insane. We can't just walk by that. That is insane. Yeah it's very weird. I'm kind of jealous of you guys because I got a hot sub and it seems like it seems like and I like hot subs better. I like hot food better. I like things hot. Right. Hey some like it hot. Right. Spoon man likes a hot baby. What can I say. I'm a spicy guy. You know I and I like I like warm food Italian food especially. What did you get it with the lettuce and tomato like did you get it Mike's way. I didn't I didn't do it Mike's way because it just seemed like it did not fit. Right. And I was sad to not get it Mike's way because I think that if you're getting a cold sub I think that like oh yeah like I want

to have that sauce and I want all the salt and pepper on there. I think that I think that sounds great. But fresh veggies on a hot sandwich sometimes are not a good. No they just wilt. And I my only experience with Jersey Mike's before this is that I ordered at the Simpsons and I ordered it at the wrong Jersey Mike's. Oh boy. And there was one right by Fox and I ordered very far away. The Simpsons guys they want their food out right at one early if you get it before then they're even happier. Yeah. And it got out at 2 p.m. Oh fuck. That room got real grumpy. I bet if you remember one specific bad Simpsons episode from 2009 or 10. I can't think of any. That's that's me. That was you. Wow. All the characters are we're hungry. All the characters are very

hungry. I'm hungry. Me too. Man. Why who is that another bar. There was two bars. There are two bars in it. There are two bars. It's really confusing. There are two bars wandering around hungry. And then there was also there was also Homer's dumber larger cousin from Quincy, Massachusetts. Hey, I've been Simpsonized Wyger. You have. I am. I'm in the show. You are Boston fan. Yeah, you're a Boston fan in the Boston episode. We talk about my favorite show of all time. It's a great app. But but yeah. So that was my one experience with before and I and I wasn't blown away. I think I got a Buffalo chicken sub or something. I gotta say it's hard to get a good cheese steak out here. A filly or steak and cheese. Right. And I thought that they did a good

job with this. Okay. The Chipotle mayo is very mayo. Yeah. And like there are some bites where I was like yeah. And the bread is soft and I wish I had like some sort of like it's that weird thing where it's like it's soft, but it's still a little too full like with the angels or something. I feel like the bread is soft, but it's kind of like thinner and this is a little bit doughier. Right. And and and but but overall I actually I'm like it's not it's pretty good. It's it's it's it kind of hit the spot, especially in a city where you can't get a great steak and cheese. Sure. There's there's there's that place as a booze. Yeah. And and and that's kind of it as far as just like steak and cheese places. You've been to Philly West over on Westwood Boulevard.

Don't bring your West Side shit out. Philly West has a great burger and they have a good cheese steak. Yeah. Well, I mean it's there's some there's some good spots, but that you have to like hunt for them. You're getting a better cheese steak or steak and cheese on the East Coast. There's no way. Of course. Yes. That's indisputable. But but yeah, no, I kind of I kind of enjoyed it. Yeah. Yeah. I've had I've and what we're all right into our final thoughts here. But I've had a I've had Jersey Mike's a bunch of different times. It's a good lunch place. When I worked at Funnier Die, there's like a little complex right next to Funnier Die. There's Jersey Mike's there. One thing they do there sub in a tub. I like if you're looking for a low carb option, they'll

give you all those ingredients just in a bowl. And it's actually they have good quality lunch meats and cheeses and it's it's not really like a salad, but it's just like all that stuff, you know, with with the dressing just sort of like you eat it with a knife and fork and it's still filling in tasty. So yeah, I think that's a good option if you're a little bit more health conscious in Jersey Mike's is your lunchtime option. Yeah, I didn't even know about that. I love I love any place like that. Like a thing I don't like about Subway is they have all the meat pre sliced. I love that they have the little slicer there. They pull it out of the whether that meat is good or not. It looks better when it's cut in front of you showmanship. Yeah. And also drew with that

some of the tub. You can also toss your cookie when they cut the cookies right off of the block in front of you or your fucking soda onto that like a pull of cereal monster. I really like I don't know if you guys noticed this or when you tip them they ring a little bell and the whole restaurant goes thank you not the customers obviously but the people working there go like thank you. Really? Yeah, it's almost it's like sometimes they do it sometimes they don't but I think they're supposed to like how at Chick-fil-A they're supposed to say like have a what do they say like you have a blessed day or something or like when you when you say thank you they say like something more than you're welcome. Weird. All right. I like the one I always

think of is the Cold Stone Creamery how if you tip there they'll sing a little song. Yes. Thank you. I don't I mean I'm not into that. That feels a little demeaning. It makes me actually not want to tip that they're making the employees do that. Yeah. That little thank you is nice. Yeah. So let's get to our final thoughts on Jersey Mike. So Drew this is how this will work. Sort of give your closing argument if you will and then land on a rating of Jersey Mike's on the order of zero to five forks. Okay. We'll start with you. If you're looking for a light lunch that's not going to slow you down and it'll leave you it'll it'll still leave you full at a great price. You got to go to Jersey Mike's get it Mike's way with a little bit of mayo.

Eat it. Eat it with the cookie. Don't eat it with the cookie. The bathrooms pretty clean. They recently the one that I go to on Western it recently went from a keypad bathroom to a key bathroom. Wow. Which I don't like. Yeah. I hate carrying that nasty key with the ladle around on it. It sucks. So and and the tables are like there's only a few crumbs on the tables. The tables aren't like filthy. This is a terrible review. No, that's great. I love your crumb. I love the crumb. Yeah. We don't take crumbs into into our rankings too often. I think it's important. None of the tables are like fully clean. There's like just like maybe one person has eaten like a quick lunch there in front of you and they've did a little

sweep off but and the chairs are usually kind of scattered around. I would give it I'm going to give it four forks. Wow. Good score. Good score. Yeah. Because I feel like my problem is the sandwiches. If you get them Mike's way they don't keep well. They get soggy. The bottoms are super soggy like after an hour. Yeah. I don't really like that. That's right. Yeah. Not not great refrigerating options. It's gonna. Yeah. I get that. Do you want me to go Nick? Sure. I'm going to do my review as as Jersey Mitch. Marrone. You know, it's hard to get a good steak and cheese out here. You know what I mean? Capiche. And then sometimes when you get it, you get the soft bread and it comes together

pretty good. You know what I mean? This is going pretty well so far. It's dynamite. Anyway, I think it's a step above Subway. Right? You know what I mean? Yeah, you know what I mean. Anyway, you guys know what I mean. I can wrap this review up. It's a lot of questions. Capichol. Slum. Prejute. You can't get any of these meats at this restaurant, but you can get a pretty good turkey sandwich and you get get a Mike's way. You know what I mean? Marrone. Capiche. Anyway, you know, Goodfellas is my favorite movie. And if I had to rank Jersey Mike's, I'd say I'd call it Good Sandwich. Not great sandwich. Good sandwich. Capiche.

Marrone. Three and a half forks. Somehow it just faded to black in the room. My power. I didn't, I haven't paid my bills. We just lost 50,000 subscribers. Mixed. That was great. I can't. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. I don't have a strong character choice to bake. I can't follow that. You got to do, do the, the, do the what? The God burger or something. Do some sort of like the Godfather. Do the God burger? Yeah. All right. Okay. All right. Here's the God burger. Oh, I'm going to make him a sandwich he can't refuse. I'm talking about the Jersey Mike's Jersey show is favorite, which is what I usually get. Provolone,

Ham and Capacuolo. I'm not sure if that's how you say it. Capacola. Capacola. That one's really good. The roast beef can't grow special. It was pretty good. I don't like the roast beef as much. Was the Godfather sick? The entire movie? Kind of was, I guess. I like their, I like, I like their, I like their, I like their cold subs more than their hot subs. I like the sub and the tub. It's a perfectly functional place that does everything it's supposed to do. Hey, don't forget about it. Three and a half forks. Yay. Fuck. Very good. God, I hate the show. The show sucks. Bunch of dog shit. Partial handholding club. Three and we both said three and a half. We both said

three and a half. Yeah. Partial handholding. I almost, I was weighing, giving it four, but part of my, cause I think like it does everything it's supposed to do well, but I was like, you know what? I like it, but I'm never excited by it. And I feel like that's kind of, for me, that's kind of the threshold of the tipping point where I think is something in the golden plate club is just like, oh hell yeah, we're getting that today. And I feel like I don't ever really get that feeling with Jersey Mike's, but maybe that's just a personal thing. Moron. Moron indeed. Moron indeed. Drew, would you say Moron? I would say Moron or Florence. That was Jersey Mike's. It's time for a new segment. We're going to sample some of the sweet

treats from around this country of ours in America candy. Oh, I was waiting for some sort of song. No, I don't have a song for this. Because we just settled on this right before recording. We did two episodes before this. So I don't have a little song. American. Oh wait, there is a Dave Maddie song, American baby. I can see it too. Yeah, but I'm not going. Let's move on. The first, Drew, I have a surprise for you. Okay. Um, stay American candy. How's that? That's great. That's good. Hi, Mike. One of each milk and dark chocolate, larger, uh, what the hell? Tar, uh, what does that say? Taratuga Turtles for you, Nick and Dustin. Dustin's not here.

Enjoy the best in the world from, uh, from Quincy. XO Mama. This is from my mom. Your wonderful mom was on this podcast. She came on the, the double episode we did a couple of weeks ago, an absolute delight, a charming, friendly, extremely likable person. You get where the, the Mitchell charm comes from. Oh boy. Um, the, the, it's, it's Lager Taratuga. So, so these are her favorite turtles. Oh, okay. Um, so she, she wants us to try these bad boys. We'll take out one milk chocolate and then we'll do one dark chocolate. Thank you, Mrs. Mitchell. This is very nice of you. Um, yeah. And so, uh, actually you can, we can each have one. Let's, let's just do that. Now, as Mitch is distributing these, there's part of the reason

we want to talk about candy and actually you have a little bit of something for us as well, Drew, but much like our buddy Jeff Dutton, you have a familial connection to the candy industry. Yes. Um, my dad, um, well, my granddad started it, uh, uh, runs a candy company called Mascot Pecan company. Oh, okay. Um, and we actually make turtles too. So this will be a nice, I brought some turtles. Oh, no way. Oh, a turtle. So this will be a nice turtle header or, or no. It's a hometown showdown. Yes. Yes. A hometown showdown. Um, yes. So these are, these are from pure chocolate. They're my mom's favorite candy at her favorite place. So these are much fancier initially like the packaging and everything and just the way they're

made are much fancier than my dad's. Oh my God, Mitch, this is so fucking good. What, wait, what were these two? There's a pure chocolate. Are these both the same? One is, one is a milk chocolate, one is dark chocolate. Okay. I just had the milk chocolate one. It's got like a little bit of that crunchy, these pecan clusters in it, and then it's got a little bit of, it seems like caramel or nougat in the middle. Is it caramel? What is it? Caramel. It's really, really good. Wow. That's delicious. And it looks like the pecans are also glazed. Right. Yeah. Man, that's really, now this is something you had growing up, Mitch. Was this, this is a common holiday treat for you? Um,

these are my mom's favorite. Okay. From pure chocolate in Quincy. But, um, we used to get Phillips growing up, which are also great turtles, Phillips candy house. But my mom wanted you to try the best. She thinks is the best. So these are fantastic. Um, I'm more of a dark chocolate guy than a milk chocolate guy. But I think of this sample, I prefer the milk chocolate. I don't know. What about you guys? I want, can I try the dark chocolate? Absolutely. I'm sorry. I think with like, oh, there's one right by you, Drew. Oh, that's right. Yeah. Um, and you, you, I'm sure that you have a good taste for chocolate and candy. Our friend, Jeff Dutton, also his, his dad, uh, his dad has a candy house as well. That's wild. And are they,

are they like retail or they like, because my dad's is not really retail. Okay. He talked about it a little bit, right? Didn't he? They do like direct mail sales and they have a little shop downstairs in their, in that small town. But is your, is your dad does direct sales or what does he do exactly? He does mostly like fundraising. Okay. Um, for like Shriners and stuff like that, mail order stuff. Um, he has like a little retail store in the town, but, um, these are both fantastic. Yeah. I prefer the milk. Yeah. I prefer them. I prefer the milk too. Which surprised me. Yeah. Drew, I love the looks of these. I love that you put them in the fridge when you first came here. Yes. Yeah. These are a little bit better. So I have from my dad's company chocolate covered

pecans, which are his kind of staple item, probably his best seller. And then I also have a pecan caramel cluster, which I don't know if the word turtles is, is like owned by Nestle or something. But I don't know if you can call, do those say turtles on them? They do not know. They do not. I don't know if you can, I think that's maybe something, but ours is called the pecan caramel cluster, which is not, not as good of a name as turtle. Cluster is unfortunate. I still like it. You know what you're getting? You know what? Cluster is fun when it comes to candy. Thank you. And they do, they look, these ones look a little different. Yeah. A little bit smaller. I don't

think the pecans have been like, I think they're just sort of raw pecans. They're not salted or anything before. Let's see here. All right. We're wrapping these bad boys. You know, there's nothing I like quite like factoids. Johnson's candy company first protected the trademark turtles in the early 1900s. And then in the 1923, they dropped it and assumed the name Demets and they still retain the trademark. So in the US, they are turtles, but in Canada, Nestle has the trademark for turtles. Okay. Oh, man, I love these. They're delicious. I shouldn't speak into the microphone while I'm eating. Yeah, that's the difficulty of a food based podcast. We always end up with these awkward moments or half a new bite, but man, these are chewy,

gooey, so soft and chewy. Really, really like them. Yeah. And I think like, I really like my dad's caramel. Yeah. Yeah, it's a great caramel. He's been working on his caramel recipe for a while, and I think he's got it down. I don't love the packaging, which obviously the listeners can't see. I don't like the packaging. I was gonna rob it. This is like 12 or 13 years old. And it's almost like coming back around as something I think they could write. They just look too carnival-y to me. Oh, I don't know. To me, it kind of like exudes a little bit of small town charm. Okay, good, good. And I think it seems kind of fancy too. And each one are individually wrapped. It's very, I think it's a very nice presentation. Yeah, but at the exterior, the bag is like a blue

and gold stripe for the pecan caramel clusters. And the other one we're trying just now. Also, I want to say that the caramel clusters are very different from the turtles in a lot of ways. Yeah, texturally and size-wise. The turtles that my mom said, yeah, they're two different mouth feels. You get a lot of more caramel with the clusters, and the caramel is fantastic. Fuck, those chocolate-covered pecans are great. Chocolate-covered pecans. Now, I think these are the best because the pecans have been roasted and salted before being covered in chocolate, which I think is like really key. Fuck, that's so good. They're delicious. Yeah, the roasted character really comes through in those bites. It's just like,

what's the word I'm looking for? Hardy isn't quite right, but it kind of has like a little bit of heft to it. Yeah, it's almost like eating a sandwich in a chocolate chip cookie in the same bite. I think we finally get where you got it. Yeah, this is it. Wow. These are all really, these are all really, really good. I don't think there are any losers here. Yeah, I think everything's great. Hold on a second. Yeah. I'm looking in this bag of chocolate-covered pecans. There's a turkey sandwich. Around all these pecans, there's a turkey sandwich at the bottom. Little tiny, they're individually wrapped inside of turkey sandwiches. These are great. Yeah. There are no winners and losers. No winners and losers. They're all winners. They're all winners.

You know what? You know the winner is America because we've got these great candy traditions from different corners of the, I was going to say different corners of the globe, but America's one continent. Different corners of the continent. From Boston down to Georgia. Yeah. And nowhere else. So if you're taking a highway in that direct, that route back and forth, yet good candy, elsewhere, your shit out of luck. Can you tell us the shop name so people can get them? Yeah, it's called mascot pecan shelling company. And they definitely do want to sponsor this podcast. Really? Yeah. They want to buy you guys. I don't know if you are. Wow. If they send us even one chocolate-covered pecan, they're in. Not even a bag. I'm just saying one individual one.

We say that dope boys can't be bought, but that's partly because no one has ever attempted. We would fold immediately. You know one thing I like about the mascot company? You get a little Scotty Dog as part of the logo. Little Scotty Dog. Very cute. Yeah. My grandma drew that. Oh, man. The mascots mascot is a Scotty Dog. It's kind of confusing. And I asked like, why was it called mascot and why is it a Scotty Dog? And I think they don't know, but it was like, we don't really remember. Like there's not like this cute little story. But I think the Scotty Dog was one of the things my grandma could paint. So she was like, well, I can paint this Scotty Dog. That's the cutest thing I've ever heard. It's a nice little silhouette. Also horrible. I'm

really craving one of those clusters again. Those are amazing. These are all fucking great. I have another one of those. That was American. Just like a restaurant, we value your feedback. Let's open up the feedback. Today's email comes to us from Kevin Asher. Kevin writes, Our fridge doesn't have an ice maker, so we still use the trays. My brother has a habit of taking all but one cube out for his drinks and leaving me to take that last cube and then refill the tray. I say this is beyond the pale. He says I'm being a baby. Who's right? Thanks for the email, Kevin. Well guys, who's right? If you live with more than one, if you don't live alone, you can't leave a single ice cube. Yeah, that's fucked up. You gotta leave two and even two is

kind of weak. Leave at least a serving. Yeah, because if we were getting down towards the end anyways, why are you going to use one ice cube for anything? Unless you've got like one of those things with those giant cubes, they use in like trendy bars. That's the only instance in which one ice cube is acceptable. But if they're standard cubes, no, that's ridiculous. I would say four. Like you can leave four. Four is good. I agree with that. I think four is a reasonable amount to leave. Yeah, if you got a 12 cube tray. Three maybe it can get away with. Your brother was calling you a baby and he left three. Yeah, that's fine. But you know what? Your brother's wrong in this instance. Yeah, we're all on team Kevin here. That's ridiculous. Surprisingly, Kevin

is not doing the mischief in this story. Yes, I know. Kevin's the good guy. This is definitely not Kevin McAllister for sure. But here's the solution. Get on Amazon, baby. Get yourself another ice cube tray. Yes. Mitch, you're fine. You're exactly what I was thinking. You're reading my mind. You need more than one ice cube tray. Yeah, you just have one ice cube tray. Here's what I was going to say. Well, he says we still use the trays. It doesn't say how many it has. It sounds like you don't have enough because the thing that's the limiting factor in home ice making is refilling it. And you know what? I will say this. If there's another ice cube tray that has ice in it and you're complaining about the one, then you're kind of a baby, Kevin. Yeah. You might

as well put a bonnet on right now. I don't think that's what's happening. I don't think that's, it sounds like all but one cube. Also, yeah, that sounds like he's intention, like it sounds like the fact that he's consistently leaving one cube sounds to me like he thinks he can get away without refilling it by leaving a single cube. Yeah. He wants three cubes and he just takes two for sure. But if there is another tray, put that diaper on. Right. Gaga, Goo Goo, you're a baby, my boy. Yeah. I don't think that's what's happening. But if it is, grab yourself a rattle and stare up of the mobile, you fucking baby. Do you guys do a Brita filters like for your drinking water? We're a spark. We're a sparkless family. We're a Nick or a spark.

I'm just wondering, do I, for a while, I had a Brita and then I was also using the Brita to fill up my ice trays, which became such a drag. So now I have a Brita and I only drink from the Brita, but I just use ice cubes from the sink. I fill up my trays. I think the ice, I mean, LA actually has one of the best tap waters and right, doesn't have it. Yeah. It's not that like, I don't think their tap water is going to be in most parts of the country. Well, we can't really say in all parts of the country anymore, unfortunately, but in most parts of the country, your tap water is going to be safe to drink. You're talking Flint. Yeah. But yeah. And I think there are other communities who that said that's happened to me. Yeah. We live in a dystopian hell

hole. But what I was going to say is like, if you're in a part of the country where you can drink the tap water, just give it a shot. And if you can have it, if you try that, if you fill it up with a tap and you have some ice from the tap and you can't notice a difference, then maybe save yourself a little bit of trouble. I do like the filtered water as ice cubes because I'm a little bit of a prima donna in that regard. So I will go ahead and fill it up with the sparklets. But here's what I was going to say. You fill it with sparklets. Yeah, fill it up with that sparklets. That's crazy to me. Yeah. Cause I like that sort of, I like that like prestige ice. Oh my God. That's part of the fun of having that, that, that nice water, filtered water you get delivered to

you. You get to have that elite ice. Oh boy. But here's what I was going to say. Like if you went to a bar restaurant, they're probably using tap water. So that's probably what you're experienced there. So feel free to just use the tap. Here's my broader point on another topic. What you're talking about earlier Mitch about getting more ice cube trays, I say get like four ice cube trays, get like six ice cube trays, get as many as you get a bunch to fill in your freezer so you don't have to fill them up as frequently and also get yourself an ice bucket. So what you can do is you take those ice cube trays, you empty them into the bucket, you got a bunch of ice in that bucket, you refill the trays, it feels psychologically like you

don't have to refill it as frequently. Not the ice bucket challenge sized bucket. No, I'm not talking about ice. They're talking about like a bowl. I'm talking about like a, well not like a bowl, but like like a tray that like a thing that fits in your freezer. Oh yeah. They're freezer sized ones that are either like a long boy or you can get one that's more of like a traditional tub that has a little cover on it. Is it called a long boy or are you calling it a long boy? Yeah, it's called a long boy. What is a long boy? You know what I mean by a long boy? It's like a like, it's like a long, a long narrow thing that you can stick in your freezer. Like I said, put a bowl in there. Yeah, put a bowl in there if you want. A bowl will work in a pinch. I'm just saying like you can,

you can take that ice and store it and then that ice is ready to go. You don't have to squeeze it out of the tray with each use and then also you can refill those ice cube trays so you can have more ice at the ready and you have to refill them as frequently. Depending on the size of your freezer, you can get like a short boy or a long girl. Oh yeah, short boy, long girl, short girl, long boy. It doesn't, there's so many options that you can get. All different styles. Right. Long dad, long dad is hard. Fat cousin. You know, I don't envy being Mr. Freeze a lot, but in a scenario like this, right? I mean, look, the guy's wife is in a frozen chamber where and she's, she's basically in a coma tragic. It's very tragic, but in this one instance to be able

to shoot your gun off and toss a little something into your drink. It seems like kind of an ideal scenario, right? Yeah, that seems pretty ice, baby. Was that one of Schwarzenegger's lines or no? It had to be, right? At some point, he said something was ice instead of nice. We've, we've, we've, we've talked about it far too much on this podcast, but it's a shame that Billy D. Williams never became Too Faced. I know. Although apparently he voiced him in the Batman Lego, Lego Batman movie. That's right. Yeah. That's fun. Oh, it's a fun little Easter egg. Yeah. If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email us at dowboyspodcast at gmail.com to get the Doughboys double or weekly bonus episodes. Subscribe at patreon.com slash Doughboys

Drew Tarver. God bless you. Thank you for gracing us with your presents. Thank you for having a great day. Great man. Do you have anything you would like to plug at this time? But Jillian dollar property season three just launched on CISO. So you can check that out. You can get to it through Apple TV or Amazon or CISO.com. Super funny show with a lot of super funny people for our friend. Cool. Cool. I saw the camera on that one. Check, check that out. And you see so if you haven't, there's a, your show also is on CISO in America. You can check that one out as well. Jonah Ray show. Don't go to CISO's headquarters. Watch it on your TV. No, there's a lot of people. Yeah. There's sick of people physically going to their headquarters

trying to watch the show. Yeah. They don't have any screening rooms. You can't show up there. You can't just show up there. Also, I'm going to plug Drew's dad's candy house. Oh yeah. Mass Scott McCann company. Mass Scott McCann company. He recently updated his website. It used to be totally non-functional. Now my little sister, she got it working. It's all good. They got their online presence a little bit better. Go check them out. Look for the Scotty. Sounds like a typical dad and not being able to. And then the daughter, he's got a short daughter, came up and helped him. Mass Scott McCann.com. Looks like that's a yes. And for my mom's thing, pure chocolate, I believe it is, and Quincy. Oh, so anyone in Quincy who

listens to this, which probably no one. Thankfully so. They'll live for this episode of No Boys until next time. For The Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell, I'm Nick Weigher. Happy eating. See ya.