Doughboys - Munch Madness: Jimmy John's vs Jersey Mike's with Mano Agapion & Betsy Sodaro (w/ Joe Saunders as Bread Correspondent)
Episode Date: March 3, 2022New Doughboys Thursday! Hosts of the podcast We Love Trash, Mano Agapion and Betsy Sodaro, join the 'boys to tackle the eponymous region of Munch Madness 2022: The Tournament of Chompions: Hero's Jour...ney: Sub-Optimal. Sources for this week's intro:https://www.pbs.org/food/the-history-kitchen/history-sandwich/https://caterline.net/blogs/news/the-history-of-sandwicheshttps://www.jimmyjohns.com/about-us/history/https://www.jerseymikes.com/historyWant more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
What's up, everybody?
It's your boy, The Spoon Man, and I want to talk to you about today's sponsor, UberEats.
At UberEats, we've helped more than 400,000 restaurants across the U.S. reach new, hungry
customers and deliver growth quickly through new orders.
Uber's global platform can help you grow, reach new people, get valuable sales data,
and unlock ways to expand with flexible delivery options.
Put your business on UberEats.
Get access to the UberEats platform, including valuable sales data to grow your business.
Dig in to your data.
Really dig in there, anytime, to monitor your performance and customer order trends.
Wow.
Wow.
Why, restaurant owners, enjoy 0% commission for the first 30 days on all orders, offer
subject to change per the terms of the restaurant agreement.
Wow.
0% on the first 30 days.
Coming up today, that link that you want to click on is down there in the episode description.
Right down there.
Check it out.
There it is.
Move your cursor.
Go ahead and click, or if you're on your phone, use your finger, and click that link.
Click that link in the episode description.
John Montague, in 1762, this otherwise obscure historical figure forever made his mark on
Western culinary tradition by naming a dish of meats between bread after his title, the
Earl of Sandwich.
Two and a half centuries later, the Earl's dish is ubiquitous worldwide, and sandwich
shops claim a substantial chunk of the chain restaurant sector.
But which of these countless witch purveyors reign supreme?
Whose combo of loaves, deli meats, cheeses, veggies, and condiments would make the Earl
feel his carbohydrate-laden legacy is secure?
Today, two appropriately eponymous sub-sandwich chains compete in a closed-face face-off.
The first, an Illinois-based sandwitchery founded by controversial yacht and big-game
hunting enthusiast James John Leotow that brags a freaky-fast delivery.
The second, a garden-state-based sub-shop name for its founder and expanded by former
employer Peter Cancro, who has his own sub on the menu.
Both lurk just outside the hallowed halls of the Golden Plate Club, but today they compete
for an even more glittery ultimate prize, the most coveted award in chain restaurant
podcasting, the Dave Thomas Cup.
Whose grinders are finer, and whose subs are sub-par?
This week on Doe Boys, the second match of the opening round of Munch Madness 2022, the
Tournament of Champions, Hero's Journey, Sub-Optimal, Eponymous Region, Jersey Mike's, versus Jimmy
Johns.
Welcome to Doe Boys, the podcast about chain restaurants.
I'm Nick Weiger, along with my co-host, Hulk Hogi, the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell.
Wow, Hogi themed.
It's a sandwich-themed roast room at Lame Rod, who writes, like Hulk Hogan, but with
a Hogi, pretty self-explanatory, roastspoonman at gmail.com, Mitch, and it's appropriately
enough because the Tournament of Champions is here.
It's begun, Wigs.
The Tournament of Champions has begun.
Our guests are applauding mutely on their screens because they have Munch Madness.
Another World War has also possibly started, but the Tournament of Champions.
The Tournament of Champions has begun.
That's the headline.
And Mitch, we have so much business to get to.
First off, we want to...
You don't want to talk about the sad reality of the world, so we should just skip the sad
reality of the world part.
I was going to gloss over it.
I was not going to bring it up even at this level.
Yeah.
But yeah, let's just ignore it, I think.
I think that's people are looking for an escape from that right now.
Or maybe they're just so afflicted with Munch Madness that they can't think about anything
else but sandwiches.
Yeah.
You know what?
That's probably it.
They're probably obsessed with Munch Madness, like you were saying.
That's what it is.
I hope everyone has filled out their brackets at chillange.com.
Hold on a second.
Oh my God, I'm playing drops right now.
There's multiple drops, boy, I want.
There's an issue.
Mitch, I can just play the drop if you want.
There's an issue, though, that they're all playing.
Well, we're not hearing them, so it's okay.
I know, I know, it's driving me insane.
Hold on.
Are you sure they're playing?
You're not just hearing them in your head?
No, hold on.
That's probably what's happening.
Mitch, I think you have Munch Madness.
That's what's going on.
No, I don't have Munch Madness.
You do.
There's like four of the same drop playing at the same time.
Where are they coming from?
Start closing some tabs.
It's going insane.
I'm going insane.
Start closing some tabs.
Yeah.
The tabs are closed.
Okay.
They all just stopped.
They've stopped.
Okay, great.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Are you okay?
What the fuck?
You are shaking.
I've never seen this.
This is okay.
I don't get what's going on.
I dropped the tab.
All right, Emma, you're just going to play this drop, okay?
Emma, you're going to play this drop when this happens.
That was scared me.
What is this?
What is this?
Black swan?
What the fuck is going on?
Oh, shit.
Why is Mitch having a Darren Aronofsky moment?
This is insane.
It all put in this.
This is insane.
This is insane.
It's fine.
Everything's fine.
Oh, Jesus.
Anyways.
Maybe it's the moment of silence to clear yourself.
There's bad stuff going on in Ukraine.
Shout out to all Ukraine people.
Why did you bring that up?
First up, yes.
First up, yes.
Yeah.
Very good.
Solidarity to ever end suffering through that.
Hope everyone with friends around me there is okay.
I did want to say, Mitch, this is something that we talked about, the world's bad.
Everyone knows that.
That's a true wisdom.
We don't even need to iterate it on here.
People just know that the world is bad going in.
That's why they're listening to a podcast about chain restaurants.
You know who I think fucked up the most?
Uh-huh.
Mrs. Putin.
Putin's mom.
Here we go.
Fucking shitty ass mom.
She sucks.
Spare the rod, spoil the child, they say.
Me thinks Madam Putin followed that advice.
I agree.
She fucked up big time.
Anyways, we had to, but I'll do what you, I'll follow your lead.
We don't look up, as they say.
We won't look up.
Don't look up.
Everyone out there, just don't look up.
As a former funnier die employer once said, don't look up.
Don't look up.
You know what?
You don't have occasion to look down.
Looking the fucking trash bins of funnier die seem fucking 100 plastic water bottles.
Look, you're getting $100 a day to make branded content for Nissan.
The trash bins filled with water, don't look down.
Look straight ahead.
Look into the camera.
Look straight ahead.
Mitch in two hours.
Hey, Emma, you got to cut that out.
Oh, yeah.
He's not going to put me in one of his movies.
That's what's going to happen.
Shut the fuck up, sus.
All right, go ahead.
Introduce us.
I just drove traffic for three hours.
I'm fucking riled up.
All right, I'm sorry.
Yeah, I know.
We can tell you're riled up.
It's obvious.
I was going to say, I thought it would be fun to say what we said on the last episode,
which is that you're Mr. Slice of bread instead of just Mr. Slice.
Not the burger boy.
I'm the sandwich lad for this month.
So I just want to let everyone know he's known the Patreon.
No, that's good.
Mr. Slice of bread.
I'm the sandwich lad.
Okay, great.
Emma, do you have the drop to play?
Yeah, here you go.
Howdy-how to Spoon Nation and Slice Nation.
You're an idiot.
They don't have a scoring system.
Mitch didn't know that Chimmy Cherry was a size.
He forgets he's from Boston.
Mitch was being ages.
Shut up.
This is actually isn't the real 300.
That was so-
Every week I put together an intro for the restaurant.
I think Mitch should give his review before the guests.
Shut up.
I was cowing with stronger in the movie.
Why is Mitch McConnell overusing the filibuster?
I went to Minnesota.
Can they see the card?
Shut up.
Gattered and smattered and splattered.
Tab was actually most popular in the 70s.
Check out our guest panel.
Shut up.
Shut up.
Your manager says for you to shut up.
Oh.
Little Simpsons.
Little Simpsons sound bite there.
It was good.
You know, I usually play those so I don't hear how it sounds for you guys.
It sounds like shit for you guys all the time.
I mean, I'm used to it.
Like it sounds bad.
It just sounds like-
The quality's not-
Yeah, the quality's not good.
It'll be okay in the episode though.
Yeah, and yes.
Yes.
Emma does her magic.
But Mitch, that's what you were hearing,
playing multiple at the same time in your headphones.
Yes, I heard that multiple times.
I think it was times five, maybe times four.
I could see how that was traumatizing for you.
Yeah, you were hearing your own voice say,
shut up to you.
It was insane.
Six different ways.
You were like Jack Torrance in the shining,
just absolutely breaking from reality.
I get it.
And then you doing your nerd voice,
which is not too different from your regular voice,
so I couldn't tell what was going on.
How dare you.
Sorry, you're not like the listeners, boy.
The listeners are dorkier.
Hi, everyone.
Thanks for playing my drop.
It's the first one I've done with entirely original-
Mitch started coughing.
I was choking.
He grasped his throat.
Are you okay?
I started choking.
No, I'm fine.
This is chaos.
We gotta slow down.
We gotta take a breath for a second.
Well, we got a lot to get to.
I know.
That's why I'm trying to go.
You're making me choke on my tongue for God's sakes.
Hi, everyone.
Thanks for playing my drop.
It's the first one I've done with entirely original music.
I'd like to give a shout out to my pal, Derek,
who was the first other person I met
who acknowledged listening to Doughboys.
Chris Finke.
Finke is back again.
Hi, Finke.
Thanks for the drop.
Thanks, Chris.
Wow.
All right.
All right, make a shake out this stupid mask.
Hold on.
I'm gonna cry.
Mitch is...
Mitch is pulling his mask off of his face.
He had it around his neck for some reason.
Okay.
Are you all right?
I'm never wearing that again.
Almost choked on my mask.
Oh, my God.
You said that in April of 2020.
Mitch.
Before we get to our guests,
we love to bring our favorite guests back on
every Tournament of Champions.
We have a couple of fantastic guests today,
two of our favorites.
But before we get to them,
since we are kicking off the tournament
here in the main feed,
we, of course, have a special announcement.
Please welcome the commissioner
of the Doughboys Tournament of Champions,
Evan Susser.
Wow.
Wow.
No chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
Yes.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is your chance.
This is!
This is my special sacrifice!
Playing that from the speaker of his phone.
Can you leave in that.
It seems to me but zur.
Hello.
I'm going to make a brief statement
after which I will open the floor to questions.
The tournament is underway.
I will not leave a comment about the tournaments yet.
Or at the very least the one with the longest title.
After Nick and Mitch's diplomatic boycott of the 2022
credo olympic cesser games.
It is an honor to be back on the podcast and serving as my role
as lifetime commissioner.
I believe the tournament is off to a fantastic start.
As always I believe there is something lacking.
In addition to the rules laid out by Nick Weigher
in the inaugural Patreon episode.
I'd like to add some more.
That's right.
I'm pretty sure if you pan over in Sus's camera
you'll see Jode Foster because it looks like he's in a fucking
and sounds more importantly like he's in a panic room.
It just sounds like a big fucking echo fucking room.
I thought you were going to say it looks like he's in Buffalo
Bill's pit.
Probably better acoustics.
Are you trapped in a basement?
He asked us beforehand if it sounded good and I said yes
and it sounds like shit.
Are you in the ship with the arrival aliens?
Wait that wasn't Jode Foster.
Who was that?
That was Chastain.
That was Chastain.
I think it was Chastain.
Amy Adams.
Amy Adams.
It was Amy Adams.
I was in the middle of the statement.
I was talking about how there are not enough rules.
It's time for some new rules.
Great.
Oh my God.
The real time from Bill Marr theme playing on his phone.
I would have played them for you.
New rule.
On Allison Rosen's episode,
Mitch Perma banned the chain Charlie's.
That's true.
Each Doughboy's host has the ability
to permanently ban one chain from the tournament.
Wow.
Mitch has already used his.
The fuck?
New rule.
When a chain is banned from the tournament,
it is also banned from the Doughboy's podcast.
Forever.
Wow.
What the fuck?
We might have to go back on this one.
So we can never discuss Charlie's again?
Never.
New rule.
As commissioner of the tournament,
I also deserve some power.
So I am now creating the commissioner's substitution.
With this rule,
I reserve the right to swap out any of these chains
with an entirely new chain at any point in the tournament.
Wow.
Isn't there a bracket?
There is a bracket.
People have already filled out their brackets
and entered a contest of some kind.
So this will void or nullify a lot of people's brackets.
Let's put it back.
Okay.
New rule.
Sus, are you broadcasting from Max Headroom's studio?
Why did you tell me it sounded okay before we started?
I was wrong.
It sounds like shit.
It sounds better than it has in the past.
Your quality is a little better.
New rule.
As commissioner of the tournament,
I already said that one.
New rule.
There will be special correspondents this year.
Wow.
In an effort to make this tournament even more exciting
than past years,
each episode will have a special correspondent
related to sandwiches,
starting with today's bread correspondent.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
And finally, new rule.
Joe Saunders.
We all have our beloved podcast that we've come to love.
And I thought that it was important that this year
we bring back another beloved podcast.
So in a future episode,
there will be two special pickle correspondents.
And they will be the Deli boys.
Wow.
I see your scam here.
Which is also missing.
It's all the long con to get you back on the podcast
in a different capacity as a Deli boy.
Fair enough.
That's right.
Well done.
Any other questions?
I got one.
Yeah.
Are you?
Are you?
Go ahead, Mitch.
All right.
Is it possible to perm a band the Deli boys?
Yeah.
I think that would be possible if you want to like put like
some sort of marking on us to kind of keep us out.
Jesus Christ.
Maybe a list.
Maybe we could go somewhere else.
Oh boy.
I went to the Museum of Tolerance yesterday.
You know this.
I didn't stay long enough.
Yeah.
He kicked out.
It wasn't too much trouble.
I actually heard that Mitch was at the Museum of Tolerance
and he was the one booing.
I have a question, Susser.
We have two guests today.
There are two Deli boys, so we could presumably end in a tie.
Now, what is the tiebreaker in the event that two of us vote
for one chain and the other two vote for another?
Great question.
Has the special bread correspondent eaten at the chains
in question?
I don't know.
You just introduced, you just threw that at us.
I don't know.
I was thinking out loud.
I could text him.
Okay.
There's not going to be a tie.
It's just not going to happen.
Don't worry.
Okay.
It won't be a tie.
No, he's not Emma.
No, he's not.
Can we just say our producer Emma or Brink will be our tiebreaker?
I think that's probably easiest.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Our guests were waving their fingers.
Let me think about this.
The guests are waving their fingers at us.
Did you have something to say?
There's not going to be a tie.
Wow.
It's not going to be a tie.
Bull.
It's not going to be a tie.
I love it.
Oh, wow.
I don't know what that means either.
I don't know which way Betsy's leading.
I have no clue.
I'm going to be clear with listeners.
I did not boo the new Anne Frank exhibit at the fucking museum
of tolerance, by the way, just to be clear.
What?
I did not boo.
It was very nice.
It was nice.
Sus and Wags.
It was nice.
She had to live up there.
My mom and sister and I was nice that she had to live in the
Anne Frank.
Oh boy.
I'm done.
Can't do anything.
I'm done.
Yeah, I guess Emma decides a tie.
Okay.
Emma decides a tie.
Your mom and sister have been in town for one of their bimonthly
visits to you in LA.
Was it there?
Whose idea was it to go make a day out of the Tolerance Museum?
My sister wanted to go.
Your sister wanted to go.
Okay.
And yes, I did boo beforehand, not at the museum of tolerance.
You know, I actually saw Mitch's mother while they were in town.
And she said something about me.
Mitch, do you want to tell everyone?
She said that Sus looked slim.
And I said to Sus afterwards that I think she was offering him a
slim gym, but she did say he looked slim.
She said Sus looked slim.
She said Jack looked slim.
And they didn't say shit to me.
They were looking.
She said, I look like shit.
She knows I look like shit.
Followed by fucking hours of trying on clothes.
So that didn't fit me anymore.
It's sad.
It was a sad, it was, and then the, everything going on in the
world.
And then we went to the Tolerance Museum.
It's been a depressing fucking week.
Yeah.
Sorry about it.
Hang in there.
The podcast, most depressing of all, saddest thing of all.
It's true.
On that note, I will leave you guys have a great tournament.
Wait, I would have, I would have, I would have one more question
before you go.
Um, Susser, are you joining us from, uh, either the, uh, an
observatory in Puerto Rico, uh, Harvey Keitel's a brothel in, um,
uh, in New York City, uh, Maverick's boat, Nell's cabin,
or, uh, or from inside the beaver, the, the puppet from
the Mel Gibson puppet, the beaver.
Yes.
That one.
Or, oh wait, or also, or, or, or from the rings of Elysium.
Sorry.
And out of orbit.
Susser, what is, what is Steve's, uh, Ziso's, uh, submarine
like?
I said the name wrong, but you got it.
We all got it.
We enjoyed it.
I mean, we're excited, we're excited about this tournament.
It's going to be a lot of fun.
And you know what?
Thank you for your, thank you for your service.
We appreciate you.
Thank you so much.
We appreciate it, Susser.
Always invaluable.
Thank you.
And also the reason that the Dolan fix didn't happen is your
guys fault.
Okay.
Bye.
Okay.
Bye, Susser.
Wow.
Susser, uh, leaving on that note, wearing a suit, suited up
just for us.
We're not using, we're not releasing video of this episode.
Impressive.
Yeah.
Wherever the hell he is.
Chaos.
I think it was from, uh, like what's another one?
I think it was in, I think it was, uh, in that cave in
descent.
Yeah.
He was in the cave in descent.
I shouldn't have taken Jodie Foster specifics.
Hey, here's a little transition for you.
Our guests are big horror nuts.
They're big horror fans.
They're horror fans.
And Mitch, they are also fans of all things trash.
And in a month where we're cramming our faces with a whole
bunch of subs, who better to have on the podcast and the host
of the podcast.
We love trash.
Manoa Gapien and Betsy Sadaro.
Manoa Betsy.
Thank you so much for being here.
Woo.
Woo.
They treat you like a dance.
Wow.
Thanks for having us.
This has already been fun.
I'm so pumped.
What a treat.
We love trash.
Sorry for making you wait for so long through so much shit.
No, it was great.
Mitch.
I was laughing hard.
You know what I was getting from you, Mitch?
I was getting dad who's yelling at the sleepover.
Like, and like the kids are like, we've been with the kids are
like, we've been asleep for half an hour.
And the dad's like, shut up.
Shut the fuck up.
Yeah, but you're causing the kids to start laughing more than
it's a vicious cycle.
Yes.
That's always fun.
And then the dad can kind of like come down and laugh a little
too, but he's like, but really go to bed.
It's okay.
You know, dad and the sleepover is a lot of fun.
It's a back and forth.
It was very fun.
I nearly lost my mind.
Yeah, you're doing fine.
You're hanging in there.
And we're in the groove of things now.
We got a couple of great guests and we're going to talk about
sandwiches and I want to begin here.
Like a big, big broad question, but let's keep it broad.
What are your favorite types of sandwiches?
What do you look for in a sandwich?
And are there any sandwich?
No.
Okay.
Okay.
This is great.
I love just an Italian sub.
It's a great sandwich.
And I like it when it gets sloppy.
You know, like I like it when the bread is soaking up all the
slop so much and shredded lettuce.
Yeah.
And I'm kind of different.
I'm not an Italian sub person.
And we have had fist fights about it.
Horrid, horrid fights, shakedowns.
But I, I'm not, I don't love the Italian.
It's too salty to me.
I'd rather a club or a turkey or a more of a meat.
Like something like a, with a pork belly.
Like I know that's not sub, but like I like more of like a,
that kind of sandwich.
It's funny when we were,
when we were talking about what to do for subs,
because we were trying to figure out and we landed on one hot,
one cold was kind of what we landed on,
which immediately caused problems as one of the chains today.
Yes.
But we almost went one for a basis.
We almost went with turkey sub.
And I told Waggs, no way.
I said, I never ordered a turkey sub.
You didn't like turkey.
But you like turkey.
You just don't like it in a sandwich.
I like turkey, but I'm like,
when do you ever order a turkey sub?
I think a lot of people do is like a,
as like a work lunch or something.
Emma's nodding along.
I went, I went yesterday.
I went to potato chips deli.
Do you know what in LA?
No.
Local deli a couple of locations.
No.
Oh, you gotta go.
It's right near the grove.
So I mean, I never go myself.
Ever.
But we were my mom and sister.
Another one in Culver City.
And yeah, there's a few of them now,
but that was the first one was right there by the grove.
I believe.
And that's like one of the few places where I'll order
the like the turkey sandwich, which is great.
And the roast beef is really good.
We weren't there yesterday.
My sister got the Italian.
I got the roast beef.
My mom got the astronomy.
We didn't even get the turkey.
But it's really great.
It's a good sandwich spot.
I found a good frozen pizza the other day.
Yeah.
You guys, you guys get tri-potato chips deli.
Yeah.
Good.
Urban pie.
Urban pie frozen pizza.
I tried the other day.
Also great.
There you go.
Let's go.
Look.
See, Mitch, I gotta say I like turkey because I like turkey.
I think I just like turkey, but I actually like it because
I feel like it makes the other stuff pop.
Like I, you know, just like bacon, cheese, avocado, like those.
I don't know why.
See, and I never order it because I feel I make that at home enough.
Like I always buy deli turkey.
Right.
And so then it's like, well, it's not a treat if I order it.
Yeah.
Because I already make it.
Betsy's nailing it.
Yeah.
But I do agree, Manu.
It does make everything else pop, which is very fun.
Here's my, here's my sub power rankings.
This is how it will go.
Oh, shit.
All right.
We need, we need, we need everyone's power ranks on subs.
Why?
Here we go.
Here we go.
Okay.
Damn.
This is really hard for me.
And we're talking cold cuts though, right?
That's what, that's the delineator, right?
We're talking about high hold.
Well, I think hot subs, hot subs included.
Hot subs are up for grabs.
Yeah.
Okay.
For me, I get it less.
I probably get this less than I get the other two that I'm going to say.
I definitely do.
But I think my number one's got to go steak and cheese.
It's a steak and cheese sub to me.
It's like my number one.
Yeah.
Then number two, I'm going meatball sub.
I love a good meatball sub.
Great choice.
Yes.
And three for me is the Italian.
Co-cut Italian sub, which, but then man, that Italian can sometimes move its way up
to number one.
The power rankings are tough.
They're tough.
Right?
What, what, what, what are your guys power rankings?
Your top three.
Top three.
Subs.
Wow.
Folks over bronze.
Well, cause now it is like Manu is saying like.
That's he's slapping her head.
Our bond means, our bond means a part of this.
Right?
The question.
I think, you know what?
No.
Bond means disqualified.
It doesn't.
Okay.
Bond means disqualified.
Disqualified.
Poe boys.
Look, we can't do, this is submarine.
I'm, I'm asking.
They're just there.
Bond means in.
Why does that matter?
Bond means disqualified.
Bond means in.
Wow.
Bond means is a lettuce.
Are we going to dequeue a Mufiletta?
Mufiletta is in.
Mufiletta is, oh, what are you talking about?
It's in.
It's Mufiletta.
Is it Mufiletta?
I call it a Mufiletta.
I thought it was a Mufiletta.
I mean.
I think it's a Mufiletta.
Probably Italian.
I think it's a Mufiletta.
So it's probably a Mufiletta?
Mufiletta?
Mozzarella.
Cheese.
Stromboli.
We are dumb enough that we maybe were trying to say Mozzarella.
So that was a big correction.
You're saying that are we talking purely subs, purely long boys?
So if we're saying that's our criteria, then I could say maybe, okay, yeah, maybe Mufiletta
doesn't qualify there, maybe like a BLT, which you wouldn't normally get as a sub.
No.
Maybe that doesn't qualify.
So we're not saying something specifically subs.
Okay.
Yes, subs.
You can say a BLT sub.
Okay, specifically subs.
Okay.
Number one, Bond me.
Number two.
God damn it.
That's bullshit.
Number two.
Bond me because it absolutely qualifies.
They're long.
Number one, Bond me.
Number two.
Bond me is not a sub.
I might be with you.
Bond me is a sub.
Bond me is a Bond me.
Absolutely qualifies.
It could still be a sub.
We could do a Bond me tournament.
We should do a Bond me tournament.
I love that.
That's the difference.
Could do a Bond me tournament.
I lobbied for Lee's sandwiches to be in, but it's not national enough.
So we ended up not doing it.
I love Lee's sandwiches.
We also told you you could do it.
We said you could do it.
Remember?
Yeah, but then we were like, ah, it's not national enough.
Well, here's the thing.
No, we would have had to make a, we had to cut something else was part of it.
And we kind of liked our final eight.
All right.
We would have.
We didn't have to cut anything, but go ahead, go on.
How do we not have to cut anything?
We're going to add episodes or start releasing extra episodes on Wednesdays.
You add it in.
You add stuff.
We have a structure.
It's a single elimination or a double elimination tournament.
Oh my God.
You and structure.
You're not an architect.
People like the structure.
You're not an architect.
I could be an architect.
No, you couldn't.
You're too late.
I should have been an architect.
Yeah, you should have.
I should have been.
I should have been.
You only say architecture is the art of wasting space.
Oh my God.
All right.
That will do for this week's dough boys.
That's the motto.
Anything you'd like to plug?
Yeah.
Honestly, I guess go Ukraine, go Ukraine.
Like, you know what I'm saying?
There you go.
That's all you want to plug.
That's how that works, right?
Plug a country.
I think so.
That works.
I think so.
I think so.
My sub top three, I would say, I would bond me would be in there.
I wanted to put meatball in there, but I just don't get meatball subs very often anymore.
I am going to put Italian in there, even though I haven't been eating red meat in quite some
time, because Italian subs are just so fucking toothsome.
I'm going to throw in there, Mitch.
I would like to have this, even if my third one, even if I didn't, if I wasn't vegetarian
for a while, I still love a well-made veggie sandwich.
I think a great veggie sandwich.
This is four, because your second was, your second, you said bond me, which by the way,
it's like when I said for the soup ranking and people may find me veggie.
You're doing the same.
No, this is the issue.
You said, but you said foe was not a soup.
That went.
This is the whole thing.
That's crazy.
It's another Vietnamese food stuff that you separated.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, the larger category.
I said, I said, let's, what do you rank soups?
That's what I was saying.
And I was trying to say like, like tomato soups go under soups, chicken noodle soups go
into soups, and then foe goes under its own category.
That's what I was saying.
This was what Mitch's soups rankings.
Here we go.
This is what Mitch says are the four categories of soup.
First up, ramen, two, foe, third, chowder, and four.
Soup.
Soup.
Soup.
That's an umbrella for every one you've said already.
I was trying to rank different soups.
Homogenous soups.
I'm trying to rank styles of soups.
Right, because if you were making argument for like stew soup styles.
Ramen, foe, soup.
I got it.
You're losing me, Mitch.
Nonsense.
Total nonsense.
Where do you put beef stew?
Hold on a second.
So one of them.
Emma, stews.
We should have added stews.
Stews in there.
This is a mess.
First of all, Margaret, you said bond me for your number one.
Your second one was meatball?
No, I said I wouldn't include meatball, but I just don't get them very often anymore.
So I put Italian in its place, and then veggie was third.
Betsy, what do you say?
What type of bond me?
You can't just put bond me up there.
I would say a bond me with head cheese and pate.
You know, like a kind of traditional one.
Head cheese sounds nerdy.
It's a nerdy sounding food.
I got head cheese.
It sounds like a fucking nerdy.
I got head cheese.
It sounds nerdy, but it's actually gruesome, you know?
It is gruesome, yeah.
I studied too hard.
I got head cheese.
That's what it sounds like.
Oh, yeah.
Me too, Clyde.
I got so much head cheese for studying last night.
That sounds like...
A variation on fellatio, the more you say it.
Yeah, the jocks are saying it also in a whole different meaning.
Dude, I got fucking head cheese this weekend.
Oh, hell yeah.
What's going on with these nerds?
One nerd studied so much, you got fucking someone blew them?
That's what happened?
Maybe we should start studying too.
Okay, I think my top three...
I don't...
The order is tough for me.
Yeah.
I'm going to go Italian, Bon Me, Cubano.
Ooh, that's a good sandwich.
I love a Cubano so much.
I can't believe this Bon Me debacle that's happened here.
And you started it, Clyde.
Oh, yeah.
I said Bon Me is not allowed.
You're going to stay pissed.
You know, I'm going to...
Okay, I'm going to just go ahead and add it.
I'm going to say like a loaded club, like a club, right?
Whatever that means to you.
Bon Me.
And I'm going to add...
Even though this is almost never good, like...
I've had way more worse ones than good ones,
but when I've had a good one, it's changed my life.
Chicken Parm.
Ooh, a good chicken parm is great.
Chicken Parm is great.
That's a great line for me.
There's so many bad ones out there.
It's a lot of bad ones.
Buff Chicken is up there too.
It's very close.
Yum.
If you don't get a single answer wrong on Mrs. McGonagall's final,
she gives you head cheese.
Whoa, Mrs. McGonagall?
But she's like 70.
I knew she was a slut.
Yeah, exactly.
She takes her dente's out.
She's been doing it for decades, man.
That's head cheese.
My dad got head cheese from her back in the day.
I remember when I took Mrs. McGonagall's class.
That was memorable.
Dad.
Senator Joey.
Oh, shit.
Sorry.
Let's just say I levitated and it wasn't magic.
You know what I mean?
The hell was going on in there?
Holy shit.
I don't know, Dad.
The Bon Mille I was thinking of, I believe, was the Doc Beat.
I'm mangling that pronunciation.
But yeah, the one that's got a pork roll head cheese
and a pate on it.
I should have said an Americanized Bon Mille.
I love the, once again, pork belly steak.
Pork.
I kind of like those more than the traditional ones.
Bear.
Yeah, same.
They're so good.
Great sandwich.
Let me ask you this.
Because we're talking chain restaurants here on this podcast,
as always, and this is going to be a chain sub-competition.
Do you have a go-to sandwich chain?
And Mano, I believe your answer may involve one of the chains
that we're reviewing today.
Oh.
I don't know.
I could be wrong.
Oh, my God.
Wait, now I'm like, what would I say?
Now I'm thinking, yeah, no.
God.
Nothing's coming to mind right now.
But let me think.
Now you've got me in my head.
I will say.
Do you want a reminder of what we're reviewing?
Yes.
Yeah, man.
We're doing Jersey Mike's versus Jimmy John's.
Yes.
I thought you meant overall.
I thought you meant like overall.
I thought you were saying like, Mano, I know you,
and there's one chain you love.
And I was like, wait, what?
I think there is.
Well, you said you were a slut about one.
So I think he's going off of you being a slut for one, Mano.
Yeah.
I thought you really liked one of these,
but maybe I was mistaken.
Oh, yeah, no.
I'm just a slut in general.
No.
I.
Ooh.
Okay.
Wait.
Do you already want my hot take on what we're eating today?
I mean, I think you can talk.
Generally.
Yeah.
Go ahead, Bo.
Okay.
Okay.
I recently haven't been.
I have been going to Gia Mela's a bunch.
Wow.
I don't know.
My go to.
Fast food.
Sub place.
It's so good.
Hmm.
It's so good.
But I'm trying to think of like.
I am.
But growing, you know, Subway was huge until I think every,
until I learned that like.
All of their meat was turkey or something.
And I was like.
Okay.
I'm done with that.
I'm trying to think sub.
I like.
But that's more sandwiches.
Or I mean.
But I counts, right?
It's not in the tournament.
We'll talk about it.
Yeah.
It's not in the tournament.
But we, but we,
but I think absolutely qualifies.
I X is a great go to.
And I was going to say that, that, that, you know,
my answer does involve one of these two chains.
I would get Jersey.
Mike's a lot when I was eating more sandwiches.
I was like.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think Jersey Mike's a lot when I was eating more sandwiches at
their app is very sleek.
There's a Jersey Mike's close to me.
And I think they have quality sandwiches,
especially good Italian sub.
They really do.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's pretty good.
I would say there's this sandwich chain.
I can't remember the name of, but it used to be,
there used to be one underneath the LA fitness on Hollywood,
which unfortunately I used to go to.
I can't think of the name of it, but they had.
Wait, is that right near like, is that like right?
Like, like Hollywood and Highland area, right?
Yeah.
Horrible.
The worst place you could go.
Jesus.
Yeah.
Worst.
Horrible.
Hollywood and Highland, a sandwich place.
It's not there anymore.
It like, oh God.
They do this weird thing where they basically like grill,
wrap sandwiches.
Yum.
And they were very good.
And they had a Buffalo chicken,
grilled chicken wrap that was so good.
Damn.
Yeah.
The first time I had Jersey Mikes,
I was a little bit of a skeptic.
And then I've really, really come around.
Why?
Because you know that I told you that one of the best places
to get an Italian sub in the city is Jersey Mikes.
This is what I was.
We talked about that.
I was professing to you for a long time.
Yeah, it's true.
I really, I really like Jersey Mikes for their Italian.
And then you know what?
Their hot subs aren't bad either,
but I think their Italian is top tier.
They just do great.
It's so good.
Very good.
It's so good.
And they just do a great job with Mike's Way.
The Mike's Way just gives you like a great kind of
east coast sub sandwich sort of vibe to it.
All of that dressing in there, that red,
I think that red wine vinegar or whatever is one of the,
is one of the most important things.
You got to slop that on the sub.
You got to sprinkle on that oregano.
The juice, what Betsy was saying in the beginning,
the juices, you got to get the juices,
you got to get those juices going.
You got to, you got to, you got to slop it up.
You got to, it's going to be messy, greasy.
It's going to have all that shit in there.
You know, pickles, hots, all that bullshit.
And Jersey Mikes does it.
You know, as for a big gigantic chain, they do it.
Kicks the shit out of Subway.
Subway better not go up to Jersey Mikes.
It destroys Subway.
We've talked about this, Mitch, in recent years,
that because so long, and Betsy was talking about this,
how, you know, Subway was, it was,
I had a lot of Subway growing up.
And until, you know, while into my 20s,
Subway was pretty, continues to be omnipresent,
one of the biggest chains in the world in terms of,
maybe the biggest in terms of number of stores.
And, but there is like this tier of sub places
that have entered the market,
including the two we're talking about today,
as well as you've got like, you know,
like a witch, which I think is up there.
Certainly like a firehouse subs.
You got scared because of witches.
Yeah, total witch.
Witch, witch.
Hopefully there's no Beetlejuice clause with witches,
where you'd say it the third time.
Also fuck witch, witch.
They're never as good as they're supposed to be.
It's annoying.
That's fair.
Yes.
But it's certainly aspiring to be like a higher quality.
You think you're going to have fun.
Yeah, totally.
I'm starting to think that a lot of the big sub chains are bad,
except for Jersey Mikes.
I mean, look, I'm not trying to, I'm not trying to,
not to win the competition.
There's a lot of surprises still wise.
We got a lot of places that we're going to go.
And you tried a couple of places the other day.
You try to, I'll say this,
you try to place the other day and you said,
tournament's over and then you try another,
another place and you said,
I'm not so sure anymore.
So I'll say that much too.
Interesting.
You ate, you ate two,
you ate at two places in a row that you really liked.
Look, we're talking about Jersey Mikes today.
And I think Jersey Mikes does a,
it does a really good job with their Italian.
Now does it do a job?
Good job with everything else.
We'll find out.
I mean, we'll find out right after this break.
We'll be back with more dough boys.
Holy shit.
You know, Mitch,
you're about to take a little trip abroad.
You're going to Costa Rica.
That's right.
Why?
So I'm going to Costa Rica with the family.
It's going to be a lot of fun.
Going to maybe see a monkey.
Oh, that's fun.
Going to maybe see a bird.
Just that.
Just a one monkey, one bird.
That's it.
Hey, that sounds like a heck of a vacay.
And you know what?
Mm-hmm.
Knowing some Spanish might be helpful down there.
Mikes.
And if you have an upcoming summer trip abroad,
my go-to travel hack is Babbel.
Whether you're a seasoned traveler
or embarking on your first adventure,
communication is key to fully experiencing a new culture.
That's where Babbel comes in.
Babbel is the language learning app
that sold more than 10 million subscriptions.
Thanks to Babbel's addictively fun and easy
bite-sized language lessons,
there's still time to learn a new language
before you reach your destination.
You know, Mitch,
I've been taking some Babbel lessons
in Spanish a little bit.
And it's a great benefit
just in terms of having some conversational
knowledge of another language.
With Babbel,
you only need 10 minutes to complete a lesson
so you can start having real-life conversation
in as little as three weeks, wigs.
Babbel's expertly crafted lessons
are built around real life.
You learn how to have practical conversations
about travel, relationships, business, and more.
Other language learning apps use AI
for their lesson plans,
but Babbel lessons were created
by over 150 language experts
and voiced by real native speakers, not computers.
Their teaching method has been scientifically proven
to be effective.
With Babbel,
you can choose from 14 different languages.
Plus,
Babbel's speech recognition technology
helps you improve your pronunciation and accent.
There are so many ways to learn with Babbel.
In addition to lessons,
you can access podcasts, games, videos,
stories, and even live classes.
Plus, it comes with a 20-day money-back guarantee.
Start your new language learning journey today
with Babbel.
And right now,
get up to 55% off your subscription
when you go to Babbel.com
slash Doughboys.
That's Babbel.com
slash Doughboys
for up to 55% off your subscription.
Babbel.
Language for life.
Hey, everyone, it's the Doughboys.
You know, this spring,
you need nutritious, convenient meals
to energize you for warmer, active days,
and to keep you on track to reaching your goals.
Factor,
America's number one ready-to-eat meal kit,
can help you fuel up fast with ready-to-eat meals
delivered straight to your door.
You'll save time,
eat well, and tackle everything on your to-do list.
Too busy to cook this spring with factors,
skip the trip to the grocery store,
and skip the chopping, prepping,
and cleaning up.
You can skip all of it, why?
Skip all of it
because factors fresh never frozen meals already
in just two minutes,
so all you have to do is heat and enjoy,
then get back outside
and soak up that warmer weather.
Looking for calorie-conscious options in springwags?
Try delicious, dietitian-approved,
calorie-smart meals
with around or less than 550 calories
per serving.
We offer delicious, flavor-packed options
on the menu each week to vet a variety of lifestyles,
from keto to calorie-smart, vegan and veggie,
and protein plus.
Prepared by chefs and approved by dietitians,
each meal has all of the ingredients you need
to feel satisfied all day long while meeting your goals.
With 34-plus chef-prepared dietitians,
approved weekly options,
there's always something new to try.
Plus, you can round out your meal
and replenish your snack supply
with an assortment of 45-plus add-ons,
including breakfast items like egg bites,
smoothies, and more wise,
I had a smoothie today, you saw it in studio.
Wow.
Tropical fruit smoothie, it was delicious.
Wow, hey, want to cut back on takeout?
Get factor instead.
Not only is factor cheaper than takeout,
but meals are ready faster than restaurant delivery
in just two minutes.
With factor, you can rest assured
you're making a sustainable choice.
We offset 100% of our delivery admissions to your door,
source 100% renewable energy
for our production sites and offices,
and feature sustainably sourced seafood in our meals.
Head to FactorMeals.com slash Doughboys50
and use code Doughboys50 to get 50% off your first box.
That's code Doughboys50 at FactorMeals.com
slash Doughboys50 to get 50% off your first box.
Do it.
Welcome back to Doughboys.
We are here with our guests, Mano Agapien
and Betsy Sadaro for Munch Madness 2022,
the tournament of champions, heroes journey,
suboptimal eponymous region.
Jimmy Johns versus Jersey Mikes.
And Ys.
Yeah.
Another tagline we forgot to say in the first episode
is a hero will rise.
A hero will rise, yes.
Did Amelia say that?
Amelia did say that.
Our new associate producer, Amelia Murino,
has been helping us out.
You know what I think we should do?
I think we should give our reviews in, like,
the Batman voice.
Okay, okay.
The riddler is a scourge on this city.
And also, I had too many sweet peppers.
What about a prepare to subvert your expectations?
That's funny.
That's really good.
That's really good.
But I'll Batman-y.
I'll Batman-y.
Do you want chips?
It's like an extra...
Because you're already getting a drink,
so if you get chips as well,
it's like a combo.
It's just like an extra $1.50.
Go for it.
They're basically free.
I'll take them if you don't want them.
Yeah.
Guys, when I ate my...
I have to tell you, my Jersey Mikes experience,
my experiences at both the restaurants were so different.
So different.
Wow.
The Jersey Mikes I went to felt a little bit
like an elementary school kitchen.
Like, something about it was like...
First of all, huge sign that just said,
no hot subs, grills closed.
Like...
Oh, no!
So I...
Wait, this is a Jersey Mikes sign?
Jersey Mikes?
No, they were just like...
No.
The staff at this particular one were just over it.
Oh, no!
I get it.
They were over it.
So I did not try it.
You thought I was a neon sign?
You think this is a fucking trailer?
I don't know.
Future?
Just throw up any sign in neon?
Someone bent neon to say, no hot subs today.
Sorry.
No.
It was just...
The vibe was very like, come on.
What do you want?
Let's go.
Oh, no!
And there were just signs everywhere.
They were like, don't touch the chairs.
Don't touch the chairs.
Yeah.
I took a picture of it.
I took a picture of it.
I love it.
I know.
I love touching chairs.
There's a huge chair toucher I've heard.
Touch a one right now.
Yeah, I am.
But yeah, I took a picture.
I don't know if you can see it through the...
But can you see that?
It says, do not touch chairs.
Yeah, it's a neon sign.
Like why it says neon sign.
Yeah.
And there was whatever.
They were just like, grill is closed.
Sorry.
No hot subs.
Oh, that's such a bummer.
A little smiley face at least.
Bummer.
My experience.
I have a question for you.
Yeah.
Did you accidentally wander into an elementary lunch school?
Lunch school?
No, but they did ask for my lunch program number.
And I got a side of applesauce.
I think it's really cool they're doing sides of applesauce now.
I said elementary lunch school.
That's what you went to.
But I don't know.
It was the Jimmy John's experience.
I was in and out.
I don't know.
I used the online ordering thing.
It was so seamless.
Yeah.
Jimmy John's is indeed freaky fast as promised.
That's one thing I will say to its credit.
But before we get into this, Mitch.
Yes.
This is the tournament and people love the rules.
So we're going to get into the rules.
Oh my God.
Rule number one.
Sandwiches only.
Side stay on the sidelines.
Drinks are in the stink.
Chips get the slip.
Cookies are oaky.
Soups off.
That's right.
Next up.
Rule number two.
We are in a pickle.
Pickles are eligible.
That's right.
Rule number three.
If it's national, it's rational.
Chains must have locations across the U.S.
including the greater L.A. area.
Which means.
Wawa.
Nana.
Publics.
More like privates.
Sheets.
Your sheets out of luck.
D'Angelo.
D'Devil.
No.
And cousins.
How?
You're out of the family.
This also excludes L.A.
Chains that aren't national like Togo's.
How about D'Angelo?
No.
Wasn't that?
Didn't you pitch that at one point?
I added devil instead of angel.
Might be gilding the lily, but I like it.
D'Angelo's was the weird chain I was trying to find.
It's not important, but I just need to say
that I found the name of the place.
D'Angelo's?
D'Angelo's.
D'Angelo's.
D'Angelo's.
I don't know.
I don't know.
It might also be on this list.
Exclude your Togo's and what have you.
Yeah, it's not currently on the list, but we can add it.
Shit, I used to love Togo's.
Me too.
I used to like Togo's too.
But yeah, I don't think it's national.
Togo's.
Jesus.
It's fallen on hard times.
In fact, the Togo's that used to be a Togo's,
I think is now a mod pizza in my neighborhood.
And there's a Jersey Mike's in that same complex,
so that might have been the issue.
Okay.
Rule number four.
I like Ike, and that's a problem.
Due to personal conflict of interest,
Ike's love in sandwiches is recused from the competition.
Oh, God.
Rule number five.
Oh, my God.
Some heroes are self-made.
Sandwich customization is encouraged.
Rule number six.
We run hot and cold.
You get one hot sandwich and one cold sandwich from each eatery.
Rule number seven.
You can request extra napkins,
because subs get messy.
And then there are the susser rules that got added as well.
So Jersey Mike's versus Jimmy John's.
Jersey Mike's mentioned we previously reviewed with our friend,
Drew Tarver.
You and I both gave it three and a half forks,
and Jimmy John's we reviewed with our friend, Lauren Lapkus.
I gave it three and a half forks.
You gave it two forks two times,
both decently regarded here in the Doughboys podcast.
And I certainly have more esteem for Jersey Mike's.
Three and a half forks is a good score.
I would put Jersey Mike's up.
And I would.
So I agree.
I came up with a song for the same with the bond me you like.
Dot be it.
Dot be it.
Get myself to lees and eat it.
Canceled.
That's pretty good.
That's canceled, Mitch.
We don't do those parodies anymore.
We don't do those parodies anymore, Mitch.
Come on.
Come on, Mitch.
Come on, Mitch.
Come on, man.
That's not funny.
I liked it, but you are canceled.
Damn it.
Jersey Mike's, Jimmy John's and Betsy Mono,
we kind of got into your biases to begin with,
but you did have a phase where you're having a lot of Jimmy John's
at least, right, Mono?
Oh, yeah.
College baby.
Yeah, I had a lot in college.
And I got to say the wheat bread for me.
Has anyone here had the wheat bread?
No.
I have.
And in fact, I got it for one of my two sandwiches.
I like their wheat bread quite a bit.
I think it's better than their other bread.
And I got mine.
What?
There's an argument.
Shit.
I wish I had known that.
Yeah, why didn't you tell us that, Mono?
Because it's not us.
Good God.
You selfish bastard.
But it's not some bread.
What?
It is sandwich bread.
It's not some bread.
It is a sandwich.
Ow.
It is a sandwich.
What?
Yeah, they're like big, juicy slices of wheat.
But, and they're like, the bread is good, but...
What?
Betsy was about to get up to go to Jimmy John's
and you were just eyeing that chair she was sitting in.
You want to touch it.
Stay right here.
You can't touch it.
You can't touch it.
Yeah, I don't know.
Does that count?
Am I, does this, is this count?
Absolutely counts.
Because here's the thing.
Okay.
We, as people who have checked out our bracket at Chalange
know that we are not purely doing sub shops.
We do have what we call the non-standard region,
which is Panera versus Arby's.
So, as far as I'm concerned,
a thick-sliced wheat sandwich, wheat bread sandwich,
is valid for this competition.
Okay.
And so valid that I got one.
I got myself a veggie, which is there,
and I mentioned I love veggie sandwiches,
provolone cheese and tasty avocado spread.
They don't have avocado there.
They have that avocado spread, which is a little...
The spread.
It's been, it's, you know, it's a little processed.
It's not as great.
It's a little processed.
Chalange makes it sound like you're talking like Cajun, man.
Say it on there's Cajun, man.
Chalange.
Chalange.
We love to bid on brackets down here on the bayou.
Log on to chalange.com
and we'll drive up to Baton Rouge and toss some beads.
Man, what a cool place that is.
Great food, great food city.
You know what?
We didn't talk about po-boys much,
which I do think are valid for this,
but man, I had a fucking fantastic po-boy.
I want to say it was called po-mins
in a shrimp po-boy in Nolans.
And man, it was, it was just one of the best sandwiches.
See, Matt?
I do think there is a differentiation
when you say submarine sam, like a sub shop.
I'm not saying bon-mise and po-boys aren't,
they should join the conversation,
but that's a whole other different ranking to me.
Anyways.
Sure.
We could argue about this all day long.
And look, when I'm going to Jimmy John's,
I probably would rather get myself a fucking po-boy
or a bon-mise.
I definitely would.
Yeah.
I'm starting to think that, like,
there was maybe not a lot of great sub sandwich shops
in the chain world.
I don't know if there is.
Disagree.
Wow.
But that's why we're doing this.
National?
All right, all right, all right.
Okay.
The other one I got is the Beach Club,
which is their turkey, provolone, and avocado spread.
So again, very similar.
It's honestly basically the same sandwich
with turkey in addition to the provolone
and the spread.
And they come with the fault by fresh,
with lettuce, mayo, cucumber, and tomato.
A little interesting that they have the fresh cucumber,
not pickles on these sandwiches,
but it kind of works for me.
I like the texture of it.
Yeah, I got the same one on the wheat bread.
I got the same at the Beach Club on the Weaver.
I loved it.
I really liked it.
Yeah.
Mine was very good.
But I'm less pickly as a person.
What the hell is going on here?
I don't know.
I'm less pickly as a person though,
so that might be different.
I think, first of all, I got a...
Can I get into what I got?
Betsy, sorry.
Please.
No, please.
All right.
I went up to our beloved TV Academy.
That's where I went up to get my Jimmy John's,
the on-lanker shim.
That was the...
It's right next to the TV Academy.
That's where I went, too.
Wow.
And that's right next to the TV Academy.
I parked in the TV Academy 15-minute loading zone.
You know, Arliss was walking by.
Arliss.
Sure.
Hank Hill.
Remember?
Ari Gold was there, of course.
Ari Gold was there.
Arliss was a big deal.
House was limping around.
Yeah, house was there.
Yeah.
You'll see.
You see so many characters up there at the TV Academy.
They all did hang out.
You know what is funny is that I took a picture of this.
There's the...
Right there is the Stunt Men's Association.
Wow.
So there's a Stunt Men's Association,
and there was a bunch of like director's chairs.
I don't know what it is.
There was a bunch of director's chairs in a room
facing a TV screen.
They were all empty.
But below the Stunt Man's Association,
you can see here Stunt Man's Association,
and then it was a poster for Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.
Wow.
Which they must love.
Some cool stunts in there.
Yeah.
When I was a...
Man, it's a Stunt Man.
When I was shooting Tomorrow War,
I remember that Pratt, Chris Pratt,
and his trainer went and saw Once Upon a Time
in Hollywood together,
and I was like,
that's like...
It's like the movie almost.
Like I was saying to them,
I was like, it's like the movie.
I think they walked away from me silently.
You'd like the movie now.
Wow.
You make a movie.
I like that.
But right near the Stunt Man's Association,
you got yourself the Jimmy John's.
And why is what I got?
I got a couple things here.
I got two sandwiches, of course,
because we have to.
I got myself...
Let's see here.
I got...
Hold on.
I'm just looking at the thing.
The spicy East Coast Italian.
Okay.
It was eight inches French cut...
Eight inch French bread cut in half.
I got a cut in half.
I included napkins because that's an option.
And then I also made that a combo.
I got Salt and Vinegar Jimmy John's chips,
which look, chips are...
Chips get the slip.
Is that what it is?
Yeah, chips get the slip.
Chips get the slip.
So I can't talk about them,
but Jimmy John's does make their own chips,
which is interesting.
They made their own Salt and Vinegar chips.
They're in Jimmy John's bag.
And then I also got myself a fountain soda.
A large Coke.
Because while mothers away,
Mr. Slice will play.
So a large Coke, please, my boy.
That's what I said.
You dropped your mom off at the airport
and then immediately went to Jimmy John's.
That's what happened.
And get yourself a full shirt of Coke.
This is true.
This is true.
This was your dad.
And then I also got a Jimmy Cubano,
which was eight inch on the French bread.
I cut it in half as well.
Wow.
A pickle that I asked for to be quartered.
I did the same thing.
I got a quarter pickle.
Isn't that a torture term to be quartered?
Oh, is that?
Is that?
Or no.
Yeah, drawn and quartered.
Okay.
Maybe feel bad.
And then I got a chocolate chip cook.
Then I got a chocolate chip cookie,
but cookies are okay.
I haven't even tasted it yet,
but I want to get just as I just,
I just want to give this place a track.
Because we haven't had it in forever.
Yeah, it's been a while.
Here are my thoughts.
The closest thing to enjoyable to me was the spicy east coast Italian.
And I don't think it's a well made Italian.
I just don't think it's good.
It's got like hot peppers in it.
And like, but I'm like,
when I'm biting into a Jersey Mike's Italian,
I get so many different flavors.
There's so many different options.
I couldn't even make any,
I couldn't even,
I could add ranch or like avocado spread,
but that was it.
Like biting into that,
biting into that Jersey Mike's sandwich,
there's so many flavors.
It's so delicious.
And then my first taste,
biting into this Italian sandwich wise,
and we've talked about this a little bit,
was mayo.
That was like the first thing I tasted was just fucking mayo.
It's very mayo for it at Jimmy John's.
This sucks.
This is this.
And in mono,
when you brought up an elementary school
and then I turned out to be Jersey Mike's,
I was like,
this is what like Jimmy John's subs remind me of,
of like elementary school fucking shitty sandwich.
That's what I fucking thought.
That's exactly what I thought.
Betsy, I love it.
I'm 100% on your side here.
I was just like,
this isn't even a sub.
It's just like a shitty,
in this like hard role,
the bottom of the role was hard.
The employees couldn't have been nicer.
Extremely, very nice.
They were really cool.
They were really very helpful.
Yeah.
I am back and forth on this because I agree with you.
Like there's something so much more like real about the Jersey
Mike's overall,
there's something just feels realer about the experience,
right?
But,
but I might like a different kind of sandwich.
So like,
cause my sandwich was very,
it's very Californian sandwich,
honestly.
Like that,
the palette that won the beach club,
me and Nick both got this.
It's not like a traditional sub sandwich.
It's very like,
oh, it's like a,
it's a different flavor.
So I might be coming at it with a different palette.
I will say that that mine tasted like,
it, you know,
it was like a lighter,
fresher sandwich.
Both of mine like kind of tasted like that.
It was like a little bit of a lighter lunch as a sandwich goes.
If I'd had the Italian,
or if I'd had something that had red meat on it,
I might have a different,
I might be singing a different tune.
But in terms of executing the turkey sandwich
and executing the veggie sandwich,
I thought they did a nice job.
Well, you know what,
Mono,
Liger,
get yourself to Beverly Hills,
get yourself a fucking palette swap.
Cause this thing,
this place fucking sucks.
You need a new palette.
Cause you're sick, man.
This is disgusting.
Mitch, I got the veto.
Okay.
Which is like a little bit less stuff
than the East Coast,
the East Italian one.
Which is crazy because the East Coast Italian,
it doesn't even seem like there's a lot in there.
I'm sure the veto seems the same way.
I got it.
And it was so,
both of my sandwiches were so thin.
Yes.
They are thin.
Yeah.
It was just like,
wait a second.
Cause I actually,
I didn't mind the,
the Cuban.
It was, you know,
it was fine.
I didn't mind it
when I was able to get bites
of all the ingredients.
But that was not often.
You know,
sometimes it would be mostly bread
and like mayo and mustard.
Cause it truly felt like
one piece of ham,
one piece of bacon.
Yeah.
And then,
and the veto is kind of the same where it's just like,
wait, where, like,
I want it to be stuffed.
Yeah.
Agreed.
Well then,
is the veto one of the favorites?
Cause I,
I learned this also the hard way
when I used to go to Jimmy John's a lot of like,
oh,
you have to get something on the favorites menu.
It's an original.
See,
and I think that means less stuff.
And the Cuban is a favorite.
Uh-huh.
Was there more stuff on the Cuban?
No.
Both were very thin.
Damn.
Like both were just like,
oh,
here's maybe three pickles,
maybe on eight inches.
I want,
you gotta have six,
eight inches.
I mean,
I mean also eight inches is like,
come on,
make it 10 or 12 inches for a sandwich.
Also,
was I,
was I too mean when I told you
you had to get your palate swapped
in Beverly Hills?
I don't really think you have
to get your palate swapped.
I was a little,
I was a little confused.
Like why,
like what,
what do you mean by,
why Beverly Hills?
There's probably,
I don't know,
it's just kind of that,
like, I don't know,
there's doctors over there,
you know,
because they have like
plastic surgeons.
Okay,
got it.
Yeah.
Oh,
I get it.
I was not,
I was not,
I did not feel attacked.
Um,
I don't know.
I'm confused.
They felt like,
um,
a sandwich that I would get
as a little kid and be like,
I guess this is all right.
Even as a little kid being like,
yeah,
even as a kid,
you know,
it's,
it sucks.
And also,
it's weird that there's favorites.
And then the other category is
stinkers.
You can just get a stinker sandwich.
Yeah.
Why is that on there?
Yeah.
What the hell?
And they really give you hell
when you order a stinker.
Oh my God.
You want a sandwich with glue on it?
Okay.
Freaking weirdo.
Yeah.
I don't know.
This is tough because
I can't,
we can't say this
because I liked my sides.
I liked my sides at Jersey
Mike's better than Jimmy John's.
But that's not important today.
Yeah.
Side stay on the side.
You know,
mono doesn't matter today.
That doesn't matter because I'll say this.
If you can include my drink and my chips,
it would help Jimmy John's a little bit
because it had a nice Coke.
Wow.
It had some nice Jimmy John's chips.
I like the chips.
But the thing that counts,
the pickle,
the pickles aren't that good.
They're too cucumber-y.
They need to be able to pickle though.
Oh, man.
Give me more vinegar.
I found my pickle,
okay.
I'm going to bite into it right now.
No,
maybe I agree with you that it wasn't great.
I thought it was fine.
I thought it was like a,
like a replacement level deli pickle,
which has taken another bite of his pickle.
I would say,
I love the cheddar bread.
I love the cheddar bread.
They offered me a Jersey Mike's.
Wow.
What an upgrade.
Did you guys get offered cheddar bread?
I did not get offered that,
but let's talk about our Jersey Mike's orders.
You got a cheddar bread.
I just want to say the pickle,
same issue as the sandwich,
not enough flavor.
I'm with Betsy.
Just fucking,
not enough.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Jimmy John sucks.
You know what I'd like to see?
I would want to see,
I want to see Jersey Mike fight Jimmy John.
I want to see those two go at it.
Wow.
I'm not sure if Jersey Mike is still alive,
but Jimmy John very much is so.
A celebrity death match, if you say.
That would be fun.
That would be fun.
I'll see those,
those fucking two pizanos go at it.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
I guess.
Yeah.
But they both have gorgeous Jersey manners.
Right?
Right?
Oh yeah.
Jimmy John's does,
they suck as a company, right?
Or Jimmy John himself sucks.
Jimmy John,
the man seems to be a bad man.
I mean,
he's a,
he's a one of those super yacht owners
who's also a big game hunting enthusiast,
which he has now renounced,
but I think he's mostly renounced because of the PR.
So he kind of seems like more of a piece of shit.
I have read,
I believe that their employees are treated pretty decently
for one of the,
but I could be wrong there.
That could just be locationally dependent.
But anyways,
let's get into Jersey Mike's.
Let's get into Jersey Mike's,
the superior chain.
Let's hear it.
I got a turkey club.
I think I told you this.
So, I mean, once again,
I could be way off,
but I really liked my turkey club
cause I got the turkey,
the bacon,
the mashed up avocados,
which were more of a mashed up actual avocado
than the one I got at Jimmy John's.
Of course.
Yeah.
I like,
yeah.
And I got a mini
and they cut the mini in half
and I really liked that.
I liked that even though it was a mini,
they cut it in half.
I was like,
that's nice.
I got a mini,
one of my sandwiches is a mini
and that was delightful.
Yeah.
I'm like, yeah.
What other sandwiches did you get, Manu?
I couldn't get another hot sandwich
because the grill was broken.
The hot one.
Yeah.
As the neon sign said.
Look, I'm going to be honest with you.
They're losing a lot.
Jersey Mike's bad outing for Manu.
They fucked up.
Yeah, that sucks.
It could have been a rough day.
That sucks.
It was.
It was clearly a rough day.
They had to make so many signs.
Such a rough day, man.
Oh, I also want to say this.
This is neither here nor there,
but when I was ordering,
the person was like,
oh, he got a turkey.
And then the woman who helped
in cutting the meat or whatever was like,
no, it was a club sub.
It's because they really wanted to make sure
I got charged the correct amount.
So I could have just been responding to the energy.
I was like, oh, this energy isn't good.
I think that energy fucked you up, man.
Yeah.
It's a farmer.
You wanted to accursed Jersey Mike's.
Yeah.
A witch-witch got at it.
A witch-witch.
There's an all of the sandwich shops that are those.
Broken grill.
Betsy, you said you got a mini.
Tell us about your sandwiches.
Bizarre witch.
Cursing sandwich shops.
Cursing sandwich.
Breaking grills.
Yeah.
So I got the mini Italian.
And I've had Jersey Mike's more than I've had Jimmy John's.
Me too.
And I love their Italian.
It's really, it's right up there with like Gia Mella's
and stuff where I really look like my favorite.
So I got a mini version of that.
And then I got the Chipotle.
Cheese steak.
Yeah.
As my hot sandwich.
It was so good.
It was so good, dude.
But it was better than like a lot of the cheese steaks
that I've tried from actual cheese steak places.
Like I've always been kind of like,
they haven't really hit home for me, but that one did.
I also got a version of a varietal of the cheese steak,
the Chipotle cheese steak.
I got the Chipotle chicken cheese steak.
And I did the same strategy.
I got a hot regular and a cold mini.
It was fantastic.
It was so good.
Good.
And I'll say this, I like my Jimmy John's outing,
but the quality of product here,
like they just have better meats and produce.
It's just a different level.
And they give you more of it.
So that's definitely to its credit here.
This was a great sandwich.
This was really, really yummy.
The chicken itself, I thought was pretty flavorful,
which oftentimes this will be just like kind of like a neutral
sort of protein source, but you know,
it adds some seasoning to it.
And I put extra cheese on it to customize it,
which was a good decision because it was nice
and ooey gooey, so soft and chewy.
I love the Chipotle mayo as in something of a heat secret.
I like that they just had red and green peppers on there.
Just like strips of peppers were perfect.
Great sandwich.
I got a turkey and provolone mini,
which I would normally never get.
I'm just not a turkey sandwich guy.
I also got the beach club with turkey,
but you know, there just aren't that many options
that don't have red meat that aren't just a veggie sandwich.
And I've had their veggie sandwich so many times.
So I got this one on wheat.
I agree.
I like the presentation of the mini.
A lot of meat for this mini.
Not even specifying double meat.
I got a lot on it.
And it was filling.
I was talking with a friend of the show, Matt Apodaca,
about this, and he was like,
I'll just get a mini from Jersey Mike's these days.
And it fills me up.
And he's right.
Get the fuck out of here, Matt.
Apodaca, that's insane.
I also had a Dill Pickle's banana peppers into this.
Gotta agree.
The mini was not mini.
I got that.
It's not mini.
There's nothing wrong with getting a bigger one,
but it's not mini.
No, it's a good size sandwich.
Fill it up.
Really good.
Really, really good.
Yeah.
I really enjoyed those sandwiches.
Thin ain't in with Jimmy John's.
And mini is satisfying.
Yeah.
Okay.
This is good news for me.
I'm saying both of these things.
Yeah.
Mini.
Mini is more.
It's more than enough.
Mini is more than enough.
Great.
And thin ain't in.
I'm feeling great right now.
This is great.
Okay, good.
Well, this is such a change from the sleepover dad at the
beginning of this episode.
You guys are making me happy.
Well, I gotta tell you, I ordered very similarly to you guys.
I got myself the big kahuna cheese steak.
Because like the dad had a sleepover, I am the big kahuna.
It comes with grilled onions, peppers, mushrooms,
jalapenos, and extra white American cheese.
I meant to say no mushrooms.
Because I'm not a huge mushroom fan.
I like mushrooms fine.
But I know you love mushrooms.
You like mushrooms.
You know what?
I had them at Din Tai Fung.
We talked about them.
We had some great mushrooms there.
I actually had them with my mom and sister.
Din Tai Fung was so good.
When they were around and they were fantastic.
Those vinegar woodier mushrooms.
You took them to Din Tai Fung?
I did.
Yeah.
Oh, what a hoot.
Yeah, it was great.
It was a great time.
They were both not in a good mood and didn't want to go.
And then we're talking about how I kidnapped them.
And then they were happy by the end of the time we were gone.
You removed their hoods and then they were happy.
So I got myself the big kahuna regular sized.
The big kahuna cheese steak regular size like you guys did.
My hot was regular.
And then I got a mini tuna fish sandwich.
Mini with banana peppers and dill pickles, Mike's way.
So it just was, it came Mike's way.
And I added dill pickles and banana peppers.
Fantastic.
They do a great tuna sub.
It was a good tuna sub.
Wow.
I didn't hit their tuna.
That's hard to do.
We were trying to do just a nice little sandwich, a tuna fish sandwich.
It was good.
It was great.
You know, and I got a, I got a, uh, uh, my hot sub was good.
The, the witch, which didn't turn the grill into a toad or whatever.
It was, everything was fine.
Yeah.
Those Jersey mikes, they like gave her a baby or something.
So she's happy.
Offered up a baby.
Yeah.
Um, uh, I'll certainly give a fast food baby.
Why?
So how do I, how can I not think of a fast food baby?
Is Wendy a little baby?
Wendy's young.
Wendy's young.
Yeah.
Not quite a baby.
Are there, is there a baby mascot of anyone?
Of any chain?
Is there no fast food baby?
No, I don't think so.
Wait.
No big boy.
Big boy looks like a baby, but he has Benjamin Button disease, right?
Yes.
Yeah.
I think he might be a full grown man.
Okay.
Whoa.
Okay.
I'm going to Google fast food baby, but please keep talking.
Um, so my big, but Googling fast food baby is also very funny.
Cause I have no idea what's going to come up in that search.
Right.
You just, you just type in F and it auto completes.
It honestly is like a hundred pictures of disgusting little children eating French fries.
Just like filthy children getting no nutrients.
Jersey Mike offered up Wendy to the, the witch, which the grill was fine.
A big kahuna cheesesteak.
Fantastic.
A really good, you know, look, I think, I think cheesesteaks are, are, are tough to,
like you want to get a local places cheesesteak more.
So I mean, you want to get a local place subs.
You want to go to GMLs.
You want to go to the local place sub more than you want to go to, to anything, you know,
like any big chain you want.
Of course.
Yes.
Right.
But that's also hard to find in LA.
It is.
I mean, like,
We're in much of the country.
Yeah.
There was a, there is a, there is a Philly cheesesteak place and I forget.
Oh booze Philly cheesesteak, which I do not go to.
Oh, people hate that.
Some people, some people love it.
Some people swear by it.
Okay.
Some people do like it.
I like, I like, uh, but that's also a chain.
I believe, right?
Wags.
Yeah.
I'm not sure if booze is a chain.
It might be a small chain.
I know.
I know there's, there's also Philly West, which is a, I think Philadelphia and expats
have, have founded an air in LA and they do a good cheesesteak, but they do a really good
burger on a, on a, on a sub role.
Oh yeah.
I'm not, they're still around and I hope they survive quarantine.
Interesting.
Interesting.
I also got, they didn't count, but I got myself some cool ranch Doritos.
I got the flaming ones.
The flaming.
The flaming.
Cool ranch.
Cool ranch.
I got those too.
I was like, oh, these are good.
They were pretty good.
Wait, were they, these were in store?
Yeah.
At the Jersey mikes.
Yeah.
They had them and I was like, I have to get two bags.
I appreciate that.
You got to try these for the pod, Mitch.
All right.
Here's, here's, here's, here's the deal.
Yeah.
I, I got my Jersey mikes delivered cause people are going to be mad at me that I got delivered,
but I got my Jersey mikes delivered, but I bet it.
It should have gone to a physical Jersey mikes.
It doesn't count if he got it delivered.
Look, I would have gotten myself.
They should delete the episode.
They should delete the episode and Mitch should go to a physical Jersey mikes and they should
upload a new one so he can be an honest assessment.
Wait, why do people hate delivery?
The commercials are too long.
The free podcast.
The commercials on the free podcast are too long.
There's an ad free version that you can pay money for of dough boys.
I don't pay money for it.
I listened to the free version, which is ad supported, but I think the ads on the free version are too long.
I'm going to post on Reddit about it.
Why do they do the ads anyway?
Why do they do the ads?
Why do they need to do the ads for this free podcast where most of the listenership is free?
Shut up.
Why are you part of a podcast now?
Shut the fuck up.
Shut the fuck up.
Shut the fucking mouth.
And look, I understand there has to be a host and a co-host, but can't the host and the co-host be different people?
Well, look, all of us know too well the critiques of the podcast listener.
Yes.
Yeah.
I don't.
I don't.
They all think my voice is perfect.
Not only is Head Gum our network, but we also own 0.1% of it, right, Wags?
Oh, yeah.
That's right.
We're investors in the Head Gum network.
Yes.
Anyways, I got myself a Diet Pepsi.
It's funny because it says here, no Pepsi, Diet Pepsi on the app.
It's almost like the cheeseburger, cheeseburger sketch from SNL.
I think I'm just boring people with a thing they don't even know.
A sketch they don't even, the sketch based on the Billy Goat Tavern.
They remember that Jim Belushi sketch from 1977.
Our listeners are born in the mid-90s.
And you're going to reference a sketch.
Can they do one from a recent season of SNL?
No Pepsi, Diet Pepsi.
I got Diet Pepsi, Cool Rancherios, which I wasn't in store, so I didn't get to try the
Flamin' Hot Cool Rancherios, which, look, is on me.
But look, the tuna fish sandwich knocked it out of the park.
My big kahuna cheese steak was great.
I mean, I'll say this.
The mini does feel like it kind of changes the sandwich a little bit because it is
different bread.
It is like a little like weird small bread, but it's still fantastic.
Look, game over for me.
Same.
I know we're going to get to the final.
I know we're going to get to the final thoughts.
And it's Mano and Weigar that's holding up, but game over for me.
I don't know.
Jersey Mike knocked out Jimmy Johnny, knocked his teeth out.
Same.
I'm going to stick to my guns just because it was my first.
And I don't want to be like such a pushover that I changed my vote.
So I'm going to push over.
Come on, Mano, be a fucking pushover.
I think I'm wrong though, because literally like everything you've said has
like proven that I think I'm fully wrong.
But I think there was also a nostalgia thing because it was like such a fun
drunk food for me that when I had Jimmy John's for maybe the first time in a
decade, I was like, whoa, I missed this.
Oh, Mano.
So maybe that's it.
Well, that could be coloring your reception.
It also sounds like you went to a bad Jersey Mike's, which is like, you know,
the chains are locational dependent.
That's part of this.
It happens.
And I don't know which way Wags is going to go, honestly.
I can't tell you.
We're going to find out.
I will say this was a lot closer than I suspected.
But these are the categories we came up with our friend Allison Rosen on
Tuesday's episode of Doe Boys Double.
We're going to rate each of these chains out of $10 in newly legal NCAA
endorsement money.
So the categories are bread, meat, veggies, condiments,
slash sausage, slash sausage, if applicable, dunk ability, which is could
you dunk this in something messiness, which could be good or bad blow
factor, which is if you got a hot sandwich, you know, did you have to blow on
it?
Oh, overall sub slash theme.
And which I which I think is broader than just the sandwich also applies to
the theme of the restaurant.
And finally, would you give it to Jared, which is a yes or no.
Oh, no.
So Mitch, Mitch, why don't you, why don't you kick us off?
And I think the way I think the way to go do it is to go category by category
and say your votes for each chain.
Each one.
Each category.
Yeah.
That's the way you did last time.
And that's what I'm going to do here.
All right.
So Wags for the meat.
I'm going to give Jersey Mike's.
They get a really good score for their meat.
I think they got great cold cuts.
I think that the fact that you can get a chicken, cheese steak is like cool.
You don't have to eat red meat.
They taste really good still.
Their meat is getting a nine Wags.
I think they got great nights.
The Jimmy John Meads.
Look, then ain't in.
We said it before.
You can't taste the damn meat.
And when I did it was salty as hell, I'm going to give it a five, not the,
not the worst meat, but not by any stretch.
Nine five.
Let's back it up one real quick bit, Mitch, before you move on to veggies,
you skipped bread.
Bread is our first category.
Oh, shit.
It's all right.
Bread.
I love that.
Here's the deal.
I love that Jersey Mike's sub role.
They don't toast it or anything like that.
So that is, that is a downside to Jersey Mike's.
You can't get it like toasted.
Just comes the way it is.
But I think they do a good job with it.
I think it's good.
And I don't like that Jimmy John's bread.
It was too tough for me.
It doesn't have enough flavor.
So I'm going to go a seven and a half.
Well, you know what eight for Jersey Mike's and man five for Jimmy John.
So the same as the meat, Jimmy John's got the five again for the meat.
Um, veggies.
Uh, hmm.
I got, so I did, I said, I said my Jersey Mike's meat number.
Right.
Yes.
I said, Jersey Mike's meat number.
Yeah.
Veggies.
I think that, man.
I just wasn't satisfied with what was on these sandwiches.
I'm sorry guys.
I, the, the lettuce or whatever it like biting into the lettuce.
It just tastes like a gas store.
Like gas store.
It's not, it tastes like a gas station.
It tasted like a gas station sandwich.
Like Betsy and I were saying it tastes like an elementary school sandwich
where I was like, when I was biting into Jimmy John's and tasting that
tomato, it stood out.
It didn't blend into what I was having and Jersey Mike's it blend it.
The, the Mike's way it all blends in together.
It's just a one delicious mess.
Yes.
And, and I love that chopped up lettuce at Jersey Mike's man.
Jersey Mike's eight for lettuce.
I mean, for veggies and, and Jersey and, and, uh, and Jimmy John's,
they're too similar to these two places.
A five again.
I'll give him a fives across the board.
Condiments, sauces slash sausage.
There is no sausage at either restaurant.
Um, the condiments Jersey Mike's Mike's way is great.
Jimmy John's, they offer you ranch and avocado spread,
but mostly it's a Mayo restaurant.
I'm going three for Jimmy John's.
I'm going eight for Jersey Mike's dunk ability.
I'll say this, the dunk ability of the Jimmy John sandwich is better than
the Jersey Mike's, but what are you dunking it in Mayo?
So I will say that just that you can dunk it and stuff for the Jimmy John.
So I'll give it a seven in Jersey Mike's.
I'll give like a five for Duncan.
It's too unwieldy, but I like dunking it in the sandwich and the wrapper.
That's, that's what Betsy was saying.
That's the better way to do it.
You just do it right in the sandwich and then the oil.
It's great.
It's so good.
It's so good.
But the, the Jimmy John's is more dunkable.
Well, yeah.
Cause it's mostly flat bread.
Yeah.
I can roll a little loaf of bread.
You know where I could, you know where I could dunk that into the fucking
garbage disposal with the garbage disposal on dunk it into the fuck,
get it out of here, get it out.
I wish I could fucking block this place forever.
Messiness.
You know what?
Messiness.
This is a weird category where you get more points for being more messy,
but at Jimmy John's, it works.
Right.
That, that Mike's way is splattering onto the paper and you're,
and then that's when you get to dunk it in there and, and sop it up.
So I'm giving a, I'm giving a Jersey Mike's a seven for that.
And I'm giving Jimmy John's a four and then blow factor.
You can't, I, I heated up one of my sandwiches wise cause you and I decided
that's what we'll do.
I heated up my Cubano and my air fryer and I put it in there for a few
minutes.
And you know what?
It did taste better.
And I was like, this is a shame.
I wish that I could get a sandwich hot there.
But Jimmy John's gets zero for blow factor.
There's no blow factor going on.
Right.
Except the fact that it fucking blows.
It sucks.
And then Jersey Mike's.
It's a hundred dude.
Jersey Mike's, the sandwiches are never like too hot.
So I'm going to give it a round of five for blow factor.
Neither get it.
Neither have a big blow factor.
Overall sub and theme.
Fuck you, Jimmy John.
You get a one.
I don't like you, Jimmy John.
You get a one.
Jersey Mike.
You get a seven.
Jersey Mike is fucking.
He just, he knocked out Jimmy John.
He knocked all his teeth out, which as we know is good for a
given head cheese, but it's not good for anything else.
And then finally, would I give it to Jared?
No, I would give neither of these subs to Jared.
He doesn't deserve either sub.
Yeah.
Should I give him a Jimmy John sub?
No, he doesn't get either.
Jared doesn't get a single sub.
All right.
Great.
I'll go, I'll go real quick.
I will.
I agree with mono that I think that that wheat bread at Jimmy
John's is quite good and is a great option.
And I wish more sub places had it.
And I think that also I disagree with you, Mitch.
I think their long bread.
I think their French bread is better than the Jersey Mike's
rule.
So I'm going to say, I'm going to say Jersey Mike's.
I'm going to give a six for bread and Jimmy John's.
I'm going to give, I'm going to give an eight meat.
Wow.
Clear, clear gap here for Jersey Mike's.
That's what is happening here.
Jersey Mike's Jersey.
We're okay.
We're okay.
Wait, am I doing Jersey Mike's gets a nine for meat?
Jimmy John's.
Yeah.
It's just not at the same, same quality level.
I just got the turkey though.
It was decent.
So I'll say six veggies, same sort of gap.
The veggies were a little lower quality at Jersey Mike's,
but they are still like just a better tier.
So I'll say seven to five in favor of Jersey Mike's condiment
slash sausage, slash sausage, sausage, not applicable.
I just like that they just have fresher, fresher ingredients
and more sauces at Jimmy John, or at Jersey Mike's rather.
Jimmy John's, I just like, give me actual avocado.
That avocado sauce is a fucking cop out, avocado spread.
And I'm something of a heat seeker.
So that Chipotle sauce that I got on that, on that spicy
cheesesteak was quite good.
So I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say another
seven to five in favor of Jersey Mike's dunk ability.
That Jimmy John's was pretty dunkable.
And that Jersey Mike's I think is a little unwieldy.
And I think that ties in with both their messiness,
their messiness as well.
So I'm going to say that Jersey Mike's has,
ah, but you know what?
That mini you could dunk.
You could dunk that mini pretty well.
Yeah, you could.
I forgot about the mini.
You could.
I'm going to give points for the mini.
I'm going to give a six to Jersey Mike's and a seven,
I'll give an eight to Jimmy John's messiness.
Jimmy John's gets like a three.
That's one of the tidier sandwiches
that I think you can get from anywhere.
Too tidy, man.
Maybe too tidy, including the wheat sandwich.
Jersey Mike's gives a gets a nine.
It's messy as shit.
Overall sub slash theme.
Jimmy John, the man, a bad man.
However, I will say that I like their branding.
I like that their, their logos.
I like freaky fast.
That's fun to say.
And they seem to live up to it.
Because it's just a cold lunch sandwich.
It's just a fucking elementary school sandwich.
It's so fast because it's fucking sucks.
Fair, fair, but it's fun to say freaky fast.
And they are freaky.
That's also fair.
Also.
And you like Brad?
You like the Brad Carrot character or whatever his name?
Brad, what's his name?
Brad Garrett.
Raymond's brother.
Yeah.
Yeah, I like Raymond's brother.
Also though, here's the other thing.
Jersey Mike's is a good brand.
I like their logo a lot.
And it's fun to say Mike's way.
So I think this is a tie.
Well, no, but the Jersey Mike's,
I think just the quality of sub is maybe a little better.
I'm going to say I'm going to give an eight to Jersey Mike's
and a six to Jimmy John's.
Finally, would you give it to Jared?
No, I think both of those.
All four of these sandwiches are too good for Jared.
Yeah.
Wow.
So I'll give a hard no for that one.
Mano, what do you think?
I can walk you through category one.
Yeah, walk me through each one.
We're going to start with Brad.
I prefer the Jimmy John's wheat bread.
Oh, my God.
I'm going to beat you up when I see you again.
But I agree their white bread.
I don't think their white bread is very good.
Their white bread is not for me.
That's why I didn't get it.
The wheat bread loved it.
Wait, do I get one to 10?
Yeah, one to 10.
In legal NCAA endorsement of money.
This is crazy.
The bread I'm going to give Jimmy John's a nine on the wheat bread.
I fucking love that wheat bread.
Wow.
I love it.
I don't know it.
I don't know.
It's like sweet and savory.
And then I liked my cheddar, whatever, Parmesan bread.
I got it.
Jersey Mike too.
That was great.
I'm going to give it an eight.
It was great.
It was really good.
What's next?
Meat.
Meat.
Okay.
I got turkey at both places.
You're going to hate this.
I think I liked the turkey at Jimmy John's better.
You're crazy, mono.
You are crazy.
What the fuck is going on here?
Are you doing this on purpose?
I swear.
Also, mono.
I'm not.
I'm not difficult like this usually, right?
Hold on a second, mono.
I'm not a difficult person.
The grill doesn't work cheddar bread.
Are you sure this wasn't Jersey Mike's?
Yeah, I don't think it was.
It was just a dude named Mike wearing a jersey.
I swear.
I swear.
I swear.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm Jersey Mike.
You see the Jersey?
Don't touch my chairs.
My precious chairs.
I liked, I don't know.
They were both good to me.
I got turkey though.
And turkey is like, you know, turkey.
I think I liked, there was like a coarseness to the turkey.
I got it.
Jimmy John's, which I actually preferred where it has that
like roasted quality.
I like, so I'm going to give the Jimmy John's turkey shocking
an eight.
And I guess I'm going to give the Jersey Mike's a seven.
Wow.
Wow.
I got turkey though, because it was so plain.
Maybe that was the mistake of the turkey.
Wow.
What's next?
It's fucked.
Next up is veggies.
Veggies.
Okay.
Veggies.
I liked, I liked them both.
I liked them both.
I thought they were, honestly, I enjoyed both of them.
What?
Wow.
I got to get the sandwich you ordered from Jimmy John's.
I got to get the sandwich you ordered from Jersey Mike's.
I'll give them both a six.
The veggies are fine, but they're not amazing either way.
They're not like, oh my God.
Sure.
Wait, condiments, sausage sausages?
Next category, condiments slash sausage slash sausage.
Yes.
Oh my God.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Jersey Mike's fully wins this.
Jersey Mike's, the sauce is better.
Thank you.
The sauce and the stuff is better.
Goodness gracious.
I'll give it, I'll give it an eight.
And then I'll definitely give Jimmy John's shitty, like watery avocado spread a three.
Oh, gross.
Next category, dunk ability, which, which goes into messiness.
Two categories, dunk ability and messiness.
They're together?
No, one after another.
Well, I mean, they're, they're, they're semi related, I feel like.
Oh God.
I wouldn't dunk either of these.
I wouldn't, I, I, uh, no, I'm not, you know, I'm not dunking.
I don't want, I'm not going to dunk these zeros on dunk ability.
Wow.
Zeroes.
I like it.
I like it.
And then.
Am I just nodded along righteously?
Like she really agreed with that.
Jersey Mike's sub, it would make no sense.
So.
Impossible.
Yeah.
Cause you already have everything you need right there.
What, what am I grading now?
Messiness.
Messiness.
And the messier, the higher the score.
Oh, okay.
Great.
Yeah.
Jersey Mike's definitely eight, Jimmy John's six.
Um, and, uh, and then fuck, fuck Jared.
Oh yeah.
We still, we still have blow factor and overall sub slash theme.
It sounds like when you give it a Jared as a no.
Um, I did not, I didn't get a hot one because that guy I met,
that guy who swears his name was Jersey Mike.
He didn't have any hot subs.
So no blows.
So that'll be an NA.
NA, NA.
And what's the other one?
Overall sub slash theme.
Wow.
So that's my overall score.
Yeah.
I think, I mean, is it Mitch?
This is your.
Basically.
Your vibe.
Okay.
Yeah.
I guess.
Betsy gets a lot of stuff.
I guys.
Oh, this is tough.
I mean, you're saying nostalgia, man.
That plays a part.
Yes.
But he's also a man who kills elephants and goes, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Yeah.
That's fucked up.
So.
Oh God.
You know, I, oh God.
Oh God.
I am a, I'm going to, I guess I'm going to go six on Jimmy John's and,
uh, I'm going to do six on both.
Cause I just, it's not, I, it's not.
I just don't know because I also had a weird experience at Jersey Mike's.
Wow.
We successfully bullied him into the same score.
For each restaurant.
Yes.
Yes.
You got this.
I'm deleting the Jersey, the, the, the Jimmy John's app from my phone right now.
Jimmy John's, I will say app ain't crap wags.
Uh, the app is pretty good.
I did eat some of that triple chocolate cookie and it's just okay.
Uh, but also probably one of the better things that I had from Jimmy John's,
but just okay.
All around.
Yeah.
But does it, but not, not applicable.
Do you, do you have a stance on the cookies?
The cookie I got at Jersey Mike's was better than the cookie I got from.
Wow.
Yeah.
They, they have good brownies at Jersey Mike's too.
But keep in mind, this is not factor in.
Yeah.
Cookies are.
Now it doesn't matter.
Cookies are cookies.
Okay.
All right.
Betsy.
Bread.
Bread.
I'm going to give Jersey Mike's a nine and I'm going to give Jimmy John's a fucking
four.
Wow.
I'm mad.
I'm fired up.
Next category.
Meat.
Meat.
Okay.
Jersey Mike's a nine.
Jimmy John's a four.
There was not any on my sandwich.
Yeah.
But like Mitch said, better than other places for sure.
Like.
Sure.
Not the worst meat.
Yeah.
Not the worst, but.
Yeah.
It's okay.
Okay.
Veggies.
Veggies.
Veggies.
I'm going to, I'm going, I'm going.
I'll give.
Cosmono, you're kind of right.
They're kind of okay.
I do love that they both had white onions.
White onions on a sub is the number one.
I love that.
Jersey Mike's an eight.
And.
What's the other one?
Jimmy John's a four.
Yeah.
I think it might be getting four.
A lot.
A condiment slash sausage slash sausage.
Oh, okay.
I'm going to do.
I'm going to give Jersey Mike's a 10 for this one.
Hell yeah.
It's great.
Wow.
It's so sloppy.
Hell yeah.
It's good.
Evenly, which is very special.
You know, you don't just find these crazy pockets where it's
only Mayo and you're like, oh my God.
I kind of like this, but also you.
And then I'll do.
For Jimmy John's sauces.
There was barely any.
I'll do a three for that one.
All right.
Next category.
Dunk ability.
Oh yes.
I mean, it is a bummer because you could easily dunk Jimmy
John's.
And honestly, maybe it would have been better if I just fucking
dunk them in ranch or something.
Yeah, that's pretty.
I don't get everything in ranch and it tastes better.
Well, yeah.
So dunk ability.
It is a seven.
Jersey Mike's will give it a five.
But messiness Jersey Mike's is a nine.
And Jimmy John's was way too clean.
They were nothing was spilling out of my sandwiches.
So you're getting a one.
Wow.
Because there wasn't enough to spill.
It was insane.
Like open it up to make sure there was stuff on it.
Okay.
I like this.
I like it.
Getting at her.
Yeah.
Wait.
No, I love this.
That dude can rot in hell.
Yeah.
Agreed.
What's the next one?
Blow factor.
Oh, blow factor.
I'm trying.
My my sub was.
Let me see.
Blow.
I guess it would be kind of like a five for Jersey Mike's
and then a one for Jimmy John's because I had to blow a
little bit, but not too much.
And then overall sub theme.
And then and then would you give it to Jared?
Okay.
Jersey Mike's overall.
I'll give you an eight.
I like that Mike's way.
I like Jersey Mike's.
We're going to Jersey.
It's fun.
It's welcoming Jimmy John's.
You get a two.
I want, you know, I'll give more.
I'll give a four because the people working there were very
nice.
And that's one.
That's always.
It's always.
I'm always so happy when people are like nice to you.
You know.
And yeah.
It's like, I've worked at a subway and it can suck, but
you're being nice in that rules.
And then I would not give either of these subs to stupid
Jared.
Wow.
Yeah.
I think, I think no, I think Weiger maybe gave a sub to
Jared, but no one else is giving a sub to Jared yet.
Yeah.
Continue throughout the throughout the competition.
Where did this come from?
It was a rule I made up.
But here's the rule.
And remember, we should say this, our ruling in a Batman voice,
but okay.
Overall, you want to say your winner right now and this year,
the winner is, we decided on the double episode.
So before it's like, you send it to the devil, you know, they
send the best burger to the devil and it makes him happy.
He doesn't take so long.
Or you send it to the aliens.
This dates to the first munch madness.
This was Jessica McKenna's innovation, which is that,
this was burger brawl.
Which of these burgers would best represent the platonic
ideal of a cheeseburger if you were going to present it to
an alien and be like, this is what a burger is on earth.
So that's how we're thinking of it.
Which of these, but this one isn't going to the aliens.
No.
No, this one is going to the aliens.
Wow.
No, this one is going to Joe Rogan, a hoagie for Rogan.
And hopefully we change his mind on the vaccine is basically
what we're trying to do.
So whichever sandwich you think is so good, it will change Joe
Rogan's mind on the vaccine.
A hoagie for Rogan or alternative, we decided alternatively,
or alternately, alternatively, either way, both are fine.
Both are fine.
If you want Joe Rogan to hold strong in his convictions,
then it depends on, it depends.
It goes listener by listener, but the hoagie is going to Rogan
and we're going to count down from three and we're going to
say our winner, the one we want to win.
Okay, great.
It sounds like Mr. Slice.
He's going to gain weight.
He's going to gain weight.
He's going to gain weight.
He's going to become plump.
He's going to have a full morbidity.
It sounds like both of you, your votes are fixed.
So it sounds like your vote is pretty fixed.
So I become the pivot here.
Unless I flop, because unless I flop, because you know.
Unless he flops.
You better flop, mono.
And Emma, be ready in case we need a tiebreaker,
because you will be the deciding vote.
You better flop, mono.
Here we go.
We'll count down from three to one and we'll say in unison
in a Batman voice.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah.
God woman, do you want your sub toasted?
Me, yeah.
Yeah.
We'll count down from three to one and we'll say in unison
in a Batman voice, which of these chains we want to advance
to the semi-soft finals, Jersey Mike's or Jimmy John's,
we'll count down from three to two to one.
Jersey Mike's.
Wow.
Wow.
Jersey Mike's moving on to the next round.
Oh, God.
Jimmy John's eliminated, but may live to bite again
in our Loser's Bracket Fat Chance Kitchen.
Oh, mono, your ass is grass when Betsy and I see an X.
Yeah.
You know what though?
It was fun to be the Joker in this sandwich universe.
I don't know.
I really like Jimmy John's.
I like when they put green water on my sandwich.
Oh, my God.
Oh, wow.
I picked up some sandwiches for us, Batman.
Oh, great.
Oh, there we are.
Some Jersey Mike's.
Actually, I stopped by Jimmy John's.
Oh, God damn it.
Oh, damn it.
I'm Bruce Wayne.
I'm Bruce Wayne.
I did not eat that shit because you want to eat a good sandwich,
but all I want is chaos.
It's perfect.
You cause chaos.
Yeah.
Wow.
What an opening round.
What an opening match of the first round,
a second match of the first round here.
We will take a break.
We'll be right back with more Doe Boys.
Wow.
Hey, you.
You craving fresh, delicious, easy meals,
try wild grain and get their bake from frozen sourdough
breads, fresh pastas, and artisanal pastries delivered
right to your door.
That's right.
Wild grain is the first ever bake from frozen subscription box
for sourdough breads, fresh pastas, and artisanal pastries.
Unlike typical supermarket bread,
wild grain uses a slow fermentation process that's easier on your
belly, lower in sugar and rich in nutrients and antioxidants.
Every item bakes from frozen in 25 minutes or less,
you'll never run the risk of getting bored with wild grain.
They're constantly adding new, seasonal, and limited time
special items to try.
Plus, for every new member, wild grain donates six meals to
the greater Boston Food Bank Wags, Boston Baby,
so you can eat good and do good all at the same time.
All you have to do is sign up at wildgrain.com slash Doe Boys
and choose which type of box you want to receive and how often.
It's easy to reschedule, skip, or cancel.
Plus, for a limited time, you can get $30 off the first box
plus free croissants in every box.
When you go to wildgrain.com slash Doe Boys
to start your subscription.
You heard me.
Free croissants in every box and $30 off your first box
when you go to wildgrain.com slash Doe Boys.
That's wildgrain.com slash Doe Boys
or you can use promo code Doe Boys at checkout.
Do it.
Welcome back to Doe Boys as we continue Munch Madness 2022,
the Tournament of Chompians Heroes Journey suboptimal
eponymous region with Betsy and Mano.
Jersey Mike's moving on, Jimmy John's staying behind,
and Mitch, all munch long here in Munch Madness,
we've got experts as the commissioner promised joining us
to help determine what makes, that's right,
all munch long here in Munch Madness to help us determine
what makes a good sandwich.
Right now, we are going to welcome our very special
bread correspondent from the breadcast, Joe Saunders.
Joe, welcome to the show.
Wow.
Hey, guys.
Great to be here.
Can we do like news flashing news sounds when he comes in?
Emma.
That's the last one, yeah, Emma.
Right now, we are going to welcome our very special
bread correspondent from the breadcast, Joe Saunders.
Joe, welcome to the show.
Wow.
Hey, guys.
Great to be here.
I want to say bread correspondent in the back.
I want to go bread correspondent in the Batman voice.
Yeah.
I like that.
Wow, I love that.
Yeah, you did.
I think you won the Batman voice.
He's in the ropes gallery.
Oh, pretty good, Joe.
Wait, Joe, are you Batman?
Is it too late for me to get cast in the Batman?
Probably because the movie is coming out,
but good news is they're rebooting a brand new franchise tomorrow,
so you can, there you go.
And this one's darker than ever.
Yes.
It's so dark.
They left the lens cap on.
All right, so Joe, what makes it good?
Here's my question because you've been a bread baker for a while.
A lot of people got into bread baking during quarantine,
and that became like a popular thing,
but your bread enthusiasm predates this by quite some time.
How long have you been baking bread and what got you into the hobby?
You know, I've been probably baking bread for about,
I want to say like four years.
I think, what, has the pandemic been going on for two years,
and then I started two years before that?
So I think four years.
That's when I started my sourdough starter.
Pretty lucky to get in there before the pandemic
because everybody became a bread expert.
Yeah, it's true.
I really capitalized on it and made a lot of money over the pandemic.
Joe.
Yeah.
Specifically, what makes a good sub bread,
a submarine sandwich?
Thank you.
What does it get?
And also, we talked about this all episode,
but to you, what's a better,
you maybe had some experience with Jimmy John's.
We didn't talk about this too much in your college days at UNC.
I know that Jimmy John's, there was one near-
Mono too.
Me and Mono went to the same college.
Yes, I was literally, yes.
I was talking about loving this Jimmy John's too much.
The one next to Vespa, if you remember fucking Vespa.
For sure, yeah.
At a club.
Yeah, it's like a shitty little Italian place.
Vespa, the shitty Italian base in Jimmy John's,
the two great places at UNC.
It was also next to Gumby's.
We'll talk about Gumby's pizza later.
First of all, what makes a good sub bread?
Second of all, what do you like better?
Jersey Mike's bread or Jimmy John's bread?
I like a sub bread that is, I like a wheat sub bread, I think.
I think I like a bread that has like a little bit of flavor to it.
I don't like white bread for subs, even though I know a lot of people do.
Big disagree.
But I like kind of like, that's like kind of like a medium thickness,
not too thin, not too thick, wheat bread.
And I think I got to go, I know there was a Jimmy John's at Carolina,
but I got to go with Jersey Mike's as the better one.
Thank you.
Thank you, Joe.
You chose correctly.
Do you like a crackly outside crust?
Do you want the bread to be a little bit crusty,
or do you want it to be soft?
What are you talking about as far as consistency of this bread?
It's hot.
Crunchy, soft.
That's a good question because I think you want,
I like a little bit of crust, but just a little bit.
And a little bit can go bad pretty quickly, you know what I mean?
Sure, I agree.
So if you can get just a light little toast or a light little crust on there,
that's perfect.
But if it's too hard, if that bread's too hard,
it really can ruin a sandwich for me.
Now, Joe, I got a question for you.
Sorry, I asked every question.
This is also me and you just hang out in person.
This is how you talk to me.
This is also like a little kid meeting Santa,
even though I know who you are and I know that you're...
But Joe, has there been any bread developments lately?
Any new bread news is basically what I want to hear from you.
Wow, I don't know.
Has there been new breads?
I don't know.
That's a great question.
Some bread expert you are.
We put him on the spot.
He thought he was going to talk about sandwich bread.
He should have done what I do.
You Google bread and you push the news tab.
I don't think there has been any brand new bread breakthroughs.
Maybe just because bread has been around so long.
I don't know.
That's a great question.
Right.
I searched bread in Google News and one thing says bread zeppelin,
which I thought was funny.
But another thing said infused pizza monkey bread in Bezo Mojito.
What do you think about infused breads?
Mano, you brought up the cheddar loaf at Jersey Mike's.
Yes.
Joe, what are your thoughts on infused breads?
Do you like cheese in there?
Do you like a tomato bread?
Let me hear it.
Yeah, I love stuff in breads.
I love cheese in there.
I feel like I've had jalapeno breads before at places.
That's really good.
For cacha, you can put a bunch of stuff in.
That's really great.
Yes.
It is good.
Whatever you can get in there.
I say, hey, you know, bread's good for everything.
I have a question.
Go for it, Mano.
Real quick, is croissant a bread or no?
Wow.
Very good, Mano.
Great question.
Is it a bread?
Is it a pastry?
Because I love it.
I love it as a bread.
But is it?
Mano, Joe acting a little bit jokerish like you were before
saying you could put anything in bread going a little crazy there.
Why so serious, Mitch?
This might be crazy.
I think croissant is a bread because you can have a croissant sandwich.
Absolutely.
Oh, yeah.
And that's a damn good sandwich.
I love a croissant sandwich.
Me too.
Me too.
Oh, man.
Here's a question I have for you, Joe.
And this pertains to what you're talking.
You seem to be talking in terms of the versatility of bread.
You seem to be encouraging people to experiment.
Is there a bread too far when it comes to making a sandwich out of it?
If we're going to say, hey, what's your line?
Obviously, I can't imagine encouraging someone to make a pastrami sandwich with banana bread.
Sure.
But is there a point where you're like, I think this is acceptable, but any further
than that is a little too chaotic for me.
I don't really like, when you just said banana bread, the word bread is in there,
like definitely like more of a cake.
Sure, fair.
I don't like stuff like, you know, like when you see those things like people make sandwiches
or cheeseburgers out of like donuts or something like that.
Yes.
Or using cake.
I feel like that just ruins both things.
I'm kind of with you, Joe.
So this, I mean, this seems pretty much, this, it seems like a strong opinion coming from
a bread guy to be like, hey, you can only use bread with the burger.
You can't use any of the sweet stuff.
So it seems like you're kind of swayed by being a bread guy already.
You know what?
I'm with you on it.
I don't like to have sweet stuff on my, I don't want a donut on my burger.
I want a bun.
I'd rather a bun.
And you know what?
I didn't agree with you at first about the croissant, but I think you're right.
I think that maybe croissant is just bread.
I think it just is a classification of a bread.
Yeah.
I think it's a bread.
Wow.
I mean, a croissant seems like you can have a delicious sandwich with a croissant, but
you couldn't have a delicious sandwich with a donut.
I think.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Mm hmm.
I don't know.
I don't know.
But a croissant is also a pastry.
Yeah.
Mm hmm.
An English muffin.
It's English muffins kind of similar category.
Yeah.
Oh, I like it.
I like an English muffin.
I like a burger on an English muffin.
I think that looks damn good.
I love burgers on English muffins.
They're so good.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They're the same category.
Oh, burger English muffin is so good.
Wait, I know the ship is sailed on Jimmy John's, but have you had the wheat bread at Jimmy
John's?
I have.
I just want to know, I just want to know if you have had the wheat bread at Jimmy John's.
That's fair.
It's a good question.
I haven't.
I got to try it.
It's good though.
I guess.
I like it.
I like it a lot.
But it is something that like no one knows about and it's not a part of their marketing
at all.
Right.
Because their whole thing is like, look at this.
Look at this sub.
No.
Yeah.
I don't know.
That's their marketing.
Look at this sub.
Manon Betsy, you can, if you have any more questions, I have one final question for Joe,
but if you guys have any questions, and remember, he is a bread expert so you can really ask
him anything you want.
Give him a hard question.
Throw anything out that you want.
Joe should be able to answer this being a bread expert, yes, that we brought into this
tournament.
But I got my Google News tab open, yeah.
You could simply ask him, how do you make bread?
And he should be able to answer, but I have a final question for you.
Yeah.
But go ahead.
And you guys have any final questions for Joe?
No, just can you give me some of your sourdough starter?
Is that it sounds like you have a sourdough starter?
Am I right? Am I wrong?
Yeah, I would love to.
I love giving people my sourdough starter.
I get it.
But it's a lot of pressure.
Like you got to like take care of it every week.
It's like a, it's like a, wow, like a little baby.
Anyone wants it.
I'll bring it up.
I'm going to hit you up.
I'm going to hit you up.
Babies un notoriously have to take care of every week.
Joe, here's my last question.
Why? Because I think you're going to, I think you're going to think it's a good question.
OK.
In a submarine sandwich, where would you rank the importance of bread?
Joe, before you answer, I just want to chime in real quick and say, Mitch,
I agree that was a good question.
You mean like compared to like meat and toppings and toppings?
Yeah.
For instance, our categories were where bread was one of them,
but we also included meat, veggies, condiments slash sausage slash sausage,
dunk ability and so on.
Where do you rank bread?
So condiments, cheese, veggies.
Meat.
I still think I think I said meat already.
Bread.
Yeah.
So every every component of a sandwich.
The wrapping, like the wrapper that it comes in.
That can be a part of it.
Like the paper wrapper.
Could be part of it.
That's a part of it.
Where would you rank bread?
How important is bread?
I think bread is.
Two.
Wow.
Number two game.
I may be agree with you.
I think that's a good answer.
So what's one answer?
What's number one?
Yeah.
Meat.
I think meat is meat or if you got a bed, like whatever, the veggie or the meat
replacement, whatever, whatever.
Whatever the protein, the protein, the protein is.
OK.
Wow.
I think bread might be one for me.
Wow.
Whoa.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Sounds like Mano should be the bread expert instead of Joe.
Should change their names in the stream yard.
Mano is not the bread correspondent.
I just love bread so much.
But I'm, yeah, I guess I'm coming for Joe too.
Whoa.
I've changed Mano's name to Mano bread correspondent in our stream yard.
Man.
Sorry, Joe.
You got demoted.
No, it's good.
I will say it then again.
Mano does love that Jimmy John's sweet bread.
It's all you talk about.
I can't.
Yeah, I've lost all credibility today.
I thought Jimmy John's had a nice outing.
I think everyone's castigating Mano,
being a little too hard on Mano.
I like my Jimmy John's.
It could have won in a different matchup,
but I think Jersey Mike's is just a little tear above.
Mano is permaband, so is Charlie's.
Charlie's she-sakes, it is Mano.
You already used your permaband.
I'm now happy because Betsy's like, they couldn't.
What would Jimmy John's have beaten like a fucking
gross restore freezer sandwich?
Honestly, I don't know about that.
Those are good.
Those are kind of good, never mind.
They're pretty good.
Joe, any closing thoughts on bread for us?
No.
Wow.
You know, bread is good.
Well said.
Let's keep eating bread.
Let's get those carbs.
Don't eat too much, but have a little bit.
A moderate amount.
Yeah, yeah.
Sage words.
Sage words.
Yeah.
Yes.
Saunders, can we expect new episodes
of the breadcast anytime soon?
Probably not.
Okay.
Well, maybe.
And anything else you'd like to plug?
No.
Okay, great.
Wow.
Let's close up the bread box.
Joe is going to go back into hibernation.
No, watch Solar Opposites on Who.
Yeah.
Oh, there you go.
Check that out.
Thank you.
There you go.
Wow.
Joe writes for that show.
New season coming out soon.
Wow.
Cool.
Hell yeah.
Check that out.
Thanks so much.
Joe Saunders, bread correspondent.
Thank you, Joe.
Woo.
Great to be here.
Thanks, Joe Saunders.
Bye, Joe.
Bye, Joe.
Great guy.
Doesn't know shit about bread, but good guy.
I thought he did a good job.
What a let down.
Oh, he's here.
Yeah, he's still here.
He's still in the chat.
I need to get him out of here.
Let's put the log out of this.
Let's see.
Can I boot you?
I can ban you from the studio.
Should I log out?
I'll log out.
Are we done?
Okay.
Yeah, I think that's it.
We got you, Joe.
Okay.
Thanks, Joe.
Joe Saunders, bread correspondent.
Thank you so much, Joe.
All right.
We'll see you later.
Bye, Joe.
Bye, Mono.
Bye, Betsy.
Bye, Joe.
I'm out of here.
Hey, just like a restaurant,
we have all your feedback.
Let's open up the feedback.
And we have a voicemail today.
Let's go ahead and take a listen.
Hi, this is Jake from Pittsburgh.
My question for you is,
if you're opening your own mall
and we're able to build your own food court,
what six restaurants would you pick?
Thank you.
Shout out to Emma, the Real MVP.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
I mean, Emma, the Real one.
Fine.
Fine.
So, it's a, so, okay.
Can it be a fantasy,
or does it have to be reality?
I think it could be a fantasy.
Like, because we're building a,
yeah, this is a hypothetical mall.
Well, this mall is not going into construction.
We're not contacting Mr. Caruso
and gonna, you know,
start break ground on this thing.
This is gonna, this is a fake mall.
Ooh.
I just want to say this.
Yeah.
I moved my laptop to my belly.
Yeah.
And so now it looks like, you know,
when people put eyes on their chin
and then they hold their chin upside down,
it looks like a face.
That's what my head kind of looks like.
It looks like a chin that's been like,
do you know what I'm talking about?
Yeah.
You look, you're very bottom heavy right now.
You're kind of shaped like a Hershey's kiss.
Yeah.
It's like they put a skin texture on Grimace.
That's what you look like.
What if, what if you with these proportions
were Batman?
How quickly would people figure it out?
Well, judging by the size of his jaw,
I was just thinking of one guy.
They did a walkthrough of Palmerston yesterday.
Yeah.
My landlord and he called me in the middle of it,
which was weird.
And he was like, he was like,
the thermostat, like did you use heat in here?
And he was like talking to the walkthrough person.
And I was like, no, you know, I liked the cold or whatever.
And he's like, we would have replaced that for you.
Like saying this in front of the new tenant.
And I was like, I asked you to replace it.
You never did.
But anyways, it was a very funny landlord thing.
But I was like, I want to see Palmerston before
this new person moves in.
And then I was like, could I like go up and I was like,
if I was ever caught on camera ever,
ever, ever caught on camera,
I have such a shape that I get caught immediately.
There's no way.
Yeah.
There's no right.
Like if you saw, if you saw my shape on like a,
like America's most wanted show,
you knew he wise, you would know it was me.
You'd call me in.
Or yeah.
Or you get away with it because they're like,
Bigfoot isn't real.
Come on guys.
That sort of unsolved mystery is one of the scary,
one of the spooky ones.
No, that's right.
Yeah.
So that could be, that's your story, I think.
This could be one of two people.
It's either Mike Mitchell, actor and podcaster,
or Santa started using just for men.
All right.
So there's five of us.
We've got six chains for this hypothetical food court.
I think we each nominate one and then we collectively
try to come up with a six.
Love it.
Including Emma, the real MVP in this exercise.
I'm going to go first and I'm going to say,
I just think of it as a mall food court staple.
And it's a place that I'm always happy to see
and also happy to smell.
Give me a Cinnabon.
Oh, a Cinnabon.
Nice.
Nice.
Yum.
I do want a Cinnabon.
Yeah.
Are we building this together?
Is that what we're doing?
Yeah, we're collectively building this.
Okay, good.
This is our mall.
I'm going to throw a safe one out there
because I know no one's going to fight me on this.
I've seen it at them all before, so it works either way.
Taco Bell.
Taco Bell did good.
Great answer.
Good answer.
Everyone's happy.
And ideally a full Taco Bell, not a Taco Bell Express.
Right.
Like this has the full menu.
Okay, great.
Right.
Yeah.
This is tricky for me because I love Pizzeria Regina
and I love, Brigham's used to be in malls,
but I can't do that here.
It's not fair.
Brigham's is closed.
Pizzeria Regina I think is just,
I'm trying to have mass appeal here.
Here's what I wish.
I wish that I could do a Pizza Hut where you could sit down
like the old, I don't think that that counts either.
Not a food court, yeah.
I get it, Wags, I get it.
So I'm going to go with the next best thing to me.
I'm getting our treats fulfilled here.
I'm going to go with Dairy Queen slash Orange Julius.
That's a great answer.
That's yummy.
That's great.
You got two sweet treat options now.
You can either go for something that's like a little bit more
of a baked good or you can get yourself some sort of drink
or slash ice cream.
So that's good.
Okay, okay.
That's great, Mitch.
Ooh.
Yum.
Emma, do you have a thought?
Do you have a pitch?
I think I'd have to put like a raisin canes or a Zaxby's
and I feel like you got to have a fried chicken.
Fun.
I love that.
Smiley.
Yummy, yum.
Great counterpart for Taco Bell.
Another great savory option.
Yeah.
Man, Mitch, you mentioning pizza.
We don't have one yet.
We don't have one and I feel that's so necessary, you know?
100% necessary.
But what is a good mall?
See, like Regina for me, but you guys don't know it.
I didn't think it was fair for the exercise.
Yeah, there's Sparrow, but I just don't think of a lot of mall
pizzerias.
Maybe one of those mini pizza huts is not the same thing.
Yeah, I think the Regina's because that's what we had in malls growing up.
I've never had that.
I've never had it either.
See, Blaze doesn't, Blaze kind of sucks.
So what was the other one we did that maybe an 800 degrees?
I don't know.
It's not bad, but I don't think, I don't see those in food courts.
Right.
Well, I mean, you know, go nuts.
I mean, could, why couldn't you put a Lucifer's in there?
Who's going to stop us?
Sure.
There you go.
There you go.
I love Lucifers.
Let's do Lucifers.
Wow.
And they got.
Why the hell not?
Chicken wings and stuff too.
Like Lucifer, like, ah, slices of Lucifers.
Oh, fuck.
Okay.
We're putting the Lucifers in.
Local pizzeria.
It's going in this food court.
Great choice.
We have one left.
I'm going to say, I'm just going to say, I'm going to throw something out here.
Please do.
What were you going to say?
Because I have a, I have a thought here.
I'm just going to give a category, which is coffee.
I don't have any sort of coffee thing, but I know that's kind of boring.
I know it's kind of boring, but it's important.
And also what we're missing is that's in every food court is some Chinese food.
I just got to say that.
I was almost going to pitch Panda, but pizzas.
Can you get coffee at Cinnabon?
Yes.
You could, you know what?
Okay.
Yeah.
That'll be our, we'll say that.
So are you saying, are you pushing for like a, like a Panda Express?
Cause that's one, I think that's a crowd pleaser.
Yeah.
I'm happy to see that in the food court.
I hate to do this wigs.
I love it.
But I think me, Mano Betsy and Emma can gang up and kick your Cinnabon out.
How dare you?
You're going to evict my Cinnabon?
Oh no.
After I supported your Dairy Queen, Orange Julius?
After I let us all have a say in this, collectively you're going to boot my Cinnabon?
Look, I'm just saying it can happen.
And you know what?
It's not going to happen.
I'm not going to kick it out even though we should, but.
What are you debating, Mano?
I think Chinese food is really important in a food court and a mall.
Just have samples.
I'm down.
I support Panda Express in a mall.
Could be a Panda Express.
You also sometimes will see like a Mongolian barbecue there.
Right.
The one-off spot, which is kind of its own thing.
But I think I'd rather have a Panda.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And to me, the only, what is missing to me is that breakfast slash coffee spot wise.
I think you're right.
Yeah.
That's tough.
You only have so many slots.
Dunkins.
Cinnabon has to fill that, fill that role.
Duncan would be good.
You could do it in center of your DQ.
Oh.
You could do it.
You could do it.
You could do it.
Duncan slash Baskins.
Oh.
Interesting.
That's huge.
In the end, it is my restaurant that's replaced, even though I do think Dairy Queen is better.
But to get everything in there, I'm going to go Duncan and Baskin Robbins.
We lose Orange Julius.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
What a food court we've constructed here collectively as the unit.
Chime in with yours.
Your favorite six restaurants that you would put in your hypothetical food court.
Hashtag Supreme Food Court.
And if you have a question or comment on about the world of chain restaurants, you can e-mail
us at dowboyspodcasts at gmail.com.
Or leave us a voicemail at 830-go-do.
That's 830-463-6844.
And the tournament continues all month long on the Dough Boys Double.
You can join the Golden or Platinum Play Club at patreon.com slash Dough Boys.
Betsy and Mono, what an absolute joy to have you here.
Oh, it's a pleasure.
Thank you so much for having us.
Thanks for having us.
So fun.
I'm so mad at Mono.
We're going to take some time to rebuild Betsy's trust.
Yeah, it's going to take a lot of time, Mono.
Can you have to really prove yourself?
The podcast, you can hear the both of you together on We Love Trash, your podcast, which you can
also find on Patreon.
Yes.
You can tell us over the bottom anything else you'd like to plug.
Again?
Yes.
It's Mono and I kind of losing our minds doing whatever we want, celebrating our love of
trashy stuff.
So lots of like, lots of chain, you know, fun foods and fun trashy movies and everything.
Oh, yeah.
In February, we celebrated Wifeswap, which is an incredible show.
It was a real joy.
And yeah, we used to dump improv episodes too.
I mean, yeah, it's really a really fun, dumb pod.
And we just say yes to each other's stupidest ideas and giggle for, giggle like maniacs.
So you should join us there.
Yeah.
It's We Love Trash on Patreon.
Yes.
Find it on our Instagrams or just go to Patreon.com slash We Love Trash.
Hell yeah.
There you go.
Check that out.
Check that out.
That's so good.
Wags, I came in here with chaotic neutral or maybe chaotic evil energy.
I'd say maybe chaotic neutral energy.
Chaotic neutral.
Yeah.
Yes.
You know what?
It turned into, because of our guests, because of our fun guests, they're silly and they're
positive and a good way and they're the funniest.
It turned into chaotic good energy.
How about that?
Yeah.
I'm a Mitch.
That's so nice, Mitch.
It's really such a blast.
It's so nice.
I mean, I love y'all truly and it's so great.
We need to hang out even more.
I feel like I see all the good amount, but I want more.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Let's get an IRL hang going.
Yes.
Love it.
Yes.
It's in the Taco Bell as well.
Yes.
Those new chicken tacos are pretty good actually.
So good.
They're good.
We just had some.
So good.
Yeah.
Mano came over and we were like, let's order food and Mano's like, I don't know.
What about Taco Bell?
And we both kind of laughed and then we're like, yeah, that would be such a funny joke.
7PM.
Yeah.
That would be such a funny joke.
And then we ended up ordering a bunch of Taco Bell and the whole time he's like, this
is such a funny joke.
This is such a great bit.
That's very funny for you guys to be like, I don't know.
How about Taco Bell, your favorite restaurant?
Yeah.
I just casually think I think of Taco Bell.
It feels so strange though.
Just yeah, like on a nice Tuesday night when we were sober, like it just feels so funny
being nice.
Right.
Okay.
We're ordering Taco Bell.
Yes.
It's great.
It's great.
Yeah.
Well, God bless you for being here.
Love you.
Love you guys.
Thank you so much for being here.
And thanks to our bread correspondent, Joe Saunders.
Thanks to Commissioner Susser.
Until next time for the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell, for Mr. Slice of Bread.
Mike Mitchell.
That's right, Wigs.
That's my name this month.
I'm the sandwich lad, Nick Weiger.
That's your name this month.
Happy eating.
Woo.
See ya.
On the next Doe Boys Double, the opening round of Munch Madness continues with guest
Jenny Pearson.
Too much derided chains with vastly different approaches to the sandwich game compete for
their ticket to the semi-soft finals.
It's the non-standard region.
Arby's versus Panera Bread, Tuesday only at Patreon.com slash Doe Boys.
That was a hate gun podcast.