Doughboys - Noah's New York Bagels with Jennie Pierson

Episode Date: December 5, 2019

The 'boys are joined by actor and comedian Jennie Pierson (Blackish & Powerless) to taste a breakfast favorite at Noah's New York Bagels. Plus, the crew taste test Budweiser varietals in a new segment Seasons of Bud.Sources for this episode include:Liberalism and Protest at UC-Berkeley from Book-Ithttps://book-it.org/2017/05/history-of-liberalism-and-protest/Progressives in Berkeley Challenged by Tradition by Mark A. Steinhttps://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1986-11-03-mn-14900-story.htmlBerkeley: a history of disobedience - in pictures by Greg Whitmorehttps://www.theguardian.com/us-news/gallery/2014/nov/15/berkeley-a-history-of-disobedience-in-picturesChain store bans in San Francisco leave more shops empty, critics say by Roland Lihttps://www.sfchronicle.com/business/article/Chain-store-bans-in-San-Francisco-leave-more-14074807.phpThe History of Bagels in America by Shannon Sarnahttps://www.myjewishlearning.com/the-nosher/the-history-of-bagels-in-america/The Secret History of Bagels by Ari Weinzweighttps://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2009/03/the-secret-history-of-bagels/6928/Bagel firm founder tells what Noah would do by Ilana DeBarehttps://www.sfgate.com/business/article/Bagel-firm-founder-tells-what-Noah-would-do-3278705.php#ixzz0ZYfJTuKHNoah’s Bagels websitehttps://www.noahs.com/about-us/ Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Berkeley, California. This liberal NorCal college town, home of the University of California, was named for Irish philosopher George Barkley, though with the pronunciation altered to cater to the saner spelling of American English. But the city of Berkeley's collective political philosophy has informed its identity as a center of American leftism. Though its protest culture was first visible via the pacifist movement in opposition to a Japanese internment camp during World War II, the midsize town gained national attention as a hippie enclave in the 1960s due to its vigorous and visible student protest movement in favor of civil rights and in opposition to the Vietnam War. Its activist streak has continued to this

day, though it's become less potent as the Bay Area's onerous housing costs have increasingly pushed out the working class. And its liberal culture has had other effects, notably a local law that, for a time, effectively banned chain stores, including restaurants, creating an opening for local boutiques and eateries. And among those independent eateries was a Berkeley bagel shop founded in 1989 by an expat from New York City. The bagel re-thrived with locals and, in spiritual defiance of the law that helped birth it, would become a chain itself, seeming to expand to 38 stores in the time it took to toast an everything bagel. In 1995, it was bought by rival chain Einstein Brothers Bagels, though it continued to operate

as its own brand, alongside label mates like Carabu Coffee and Bruger's Bagels. Today, with 54 locations up and down the left coast, this Berkeley-born bagel baker with a biblical name shows that, even in one of the most liberal zip codes in the country, the lure of self-enrichment promised by capitalism is difficult to resist. This week on Doughboys, Noah's New York Bagels. Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Nick Weiger. Alongside my co-host, the Crunchwrap of Notre Dame, the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell. The Crunchwrap of Notre Dame. Is it Notre Dame or Notre Dame? I've heard it both ways.

If you're really snooty, you can say Notre Dame. So I should be saying Notre Dame. Oh yeah. Is that what you're sharing? You should say Notre Dame. The Crunchwrap of Notre Dame. Okay. Those courtesy of Chris LaCroix, not sure if that's his real name. Love you guys. Spoon

nation for life. So how about that? Well, no. He's mean to me. That's not that hard. She's saying Crunchwrap. He's referencing your favorite restaurant. He's combed it with Notre Dame because you're Catholic probably. RIP to Notre Dame, slash Notre Dame. The Cathedral? Yeah. Yeah.

Burn to the fucking ground. Burn down, baby. Hey, speaking of burns, if you want to send a burn about Mitch, roastspoonman at gmail.com is the address, but Mitch, shifting from fire to another of the core four elements, you've got earth, you've got air, and you also have water, and I bring that up because today was one of your beloved rainy days. I love a rainy day. This is very strange.

You are a Shirley Manson. You're a big time Shirley Manson. I do. I do. I'm a anti-Missy Elliot. You're an anti-Missy Elliot. So. Oh, wait, now hold on. I don't mean that in any other way. Besides, she can't stand the rain and I love the rain right to make things clear.

I scared our guests. I think you've made this exact joke before and then made the exact same correction. This all tracks. Emma, please don't point that out to our guests and to our listeners. I guess they know we've been they remember our our episodes. We were the ones who don't be. We had, so it's been unseasonable warmth for all of November here in Los Angeles. I know you've mostly been over there in Hot Lanta, which has its own heat wave.

I imagine. No, it was cool. It was cool in Hot Lanta. Oh boy. Cool Lanta. Oh, is that what they call it now? Cool Lanta? Yeah, they change seasonally.

You know what they should call it? A mylanta. Your stomach hurts. You got a hot stomach. You get some mylanta. I think I need some mylanta. What have you been eating? I had some broccoli today.

Just broccoli? What else? That's it. Big, big loaf of broccoli. You had a loaf of broccoli? A broccoli, a broccoli loaf. Like a bunch of stalks, like just compressed into a loaf form. Sliced it like bread.

Sounds vile. Yeah. I mean, you shouldn't just be eating that. I had salmon today. Salmon, rice, hummus, a little garlic sauce. So you got to get a good amount of, I think with the hummus and the broccoli, you got a good amount of dietary fiber. That's maybe where those wrong beliefs are coming from.

Yeah. Okay. Well, hang in there. I hope you're feeling okay. And then a mini broccoli. You know what I had? I had our place, Sidewalk Grill. Oh, love a Sidewalk Grill.

Boy, what a treat it is. I know. I learned it from you. I learned it from watching you and I love it. I hope that no one who listens goes there because I just don't want more people going there. Right. I don't want more people nailing down where you live. Exactly.

Yeah, that too. That's why we haven't done McDonald's. We don't want more people going there. We like it too much. Howdy how to Spoon Nation. Haven't listened to this drop yet wager. Great. Good idea.

So this is always this. It's always a little dicey when we do this. When you don't screen them, they're always better. Backfire. Let's see how it goes. They were from Estonia. They're immigrants from Estonia. Jumps down my throat for being Estonian all the time.

Love of eating stones or consuming stones soup. Discussing your Eastern European heritage. It's from Estonia. It's from Estonia. That's nice. Yeah, it was nice. I am. I mean, I'm not from Estonia, but I have Estonian heritage.

What was going on there? You were kind of looking off, especially when your country's anthem played or whatever that was. You're not. You were looking up. Are you watching? Oh, you're looking at you've got a basketball game of my peripheral vision on you. You love basketball.

I'm a big time NBA fan showed up in my NBA sweatshirt and GCW. Joey Janelle has escaped from LA T shirt. I am wearing a Joey Janella shirt. That was hey. Hey, here's my first drop. Peaching Estonian metal band. What the hell met met step Matt Stahl Metis. Met Metis stall.

How do you say that Metis stall right here? Metis style. How do you say Metis at all? Metis at all. Oh, Metis at all. There's no other S there with their track. They had that press. I don't know how to say this from their album.

I owe. I don't know how to say in you this. This is it says thanks. Josh. Joshua Arminio. He's team Stanger bot. Oh, okay. A little action boys reference.

I'm looking to met. Is it metis all? Come on. Metis all. I don't know. I got whatever it is. It sounds like a prescription pharmaceutical. But I got to look into it.

Oh, man. I keep fucking up here. Estonian metal scene. I didn't know about this. So what are you going to do now? Now that you know about it. I'm going to research it. I'm going to listen to this band.

No, you're not. I am. I'm going to listen to these guys shred and I'm going to bang my head. But you know what else I'm going to do? I'm going to introduce our guest, Mitch. We're thrilled to have her back because she's a wait. I'm going to tell you when you introduce the guests. I have exciting news.

Oh, no. No, no, I have great. I've very good exciting news. And it doesn't have introduced a guest for God's sake. You said it's so like ominous. Like you said it like panicked, but it's good news. Yes. Okay.

All right. I hope so. Our guest is back. She was on previously on a couple of Doe Boys double episodes. This is her first time on a full episode here. We're thrilled to have her an actor and comedian from blackish and powerless. Jenny Pearson.

Hi. Hi guys. How are you? I'm well. Thank you for being here. Thank you for having me. I'm very excited. Actually, I have one question and one request.

Okay. Great. Is that okay? Yeah. Is your request if you can leave? Can I leave? No, I wanted to see if I could do what do you call it? You call what do you call them roasts?

Roast. When someone when someone is funny. No, but I want to do like an opposite. Oh, because I don't like roasts. They make me upset and they make me feel bad. So I wanted to see if I could do like a nice one for me. I love this.

A toast. A toast. Can I do a toast? Please. You absolutely can. Jenny. Because I just thought of one. But please.

Okay. Wait. No, it went on my head. Wait. No, I remember. The marvelous Mitch Maisel. I love it. How about that?

I love it. I love it. That's nice. Weiger. It's a lot of fun. I like seeing Jenny. It's nice seeing Jenny. I saw her yesterday.

We ate for the meal. And it was like nice to see someone I haven't seen in a while. Like they're excited to see me when I see you. You just like it's like whatever it's you guys see each other. How often? Once a week, twice a week. Yeah, like once a week. One week.

So that's a lot. Maybe sometimes more depends on what our schedule is. Yeah, but I feel like if I came back from the dead, you'd still have like the same nonchalant reaction. Hey, buddy. Hey, buddy. Wow. Welcome back.

Wow. Did you race from the dead? Wow. I love you. That would be it. What's the spirit realm like? Did you go to heaven or how? Heaven.

You can't even pretend. You have to pretend you're so afraid of the devil in this riff. You have to pretend you just went to heaven. I didn't see any of your family. I didn't see any of your family up there either. Yeah, why would you? Jenny, you said you had a question or a request. Now what is the request?

Oh, yeah. That was the request. My question is what exactly is a drop? I don't really, I don't get it. And I hear it sometimes, you know, when I listen to your podcast, like I'll hear it and I'll be like, I don't know what, is it just like edited together quotes? Yeah, people, people, when the podcast first started off, I did kind of like my, like I started off by being like, what's up?

Spoonheads, Spoon Mania. I was trying to do a mark. Right, an eventual guest. He'll be on the podcast. Yeah, for sure. Bring his guitar. Yeah, and then we'll be on his podcast. We'll be interviewed for the show.

We'll go to the cat ranch, wherever that is now. You have a long fantasy. For Nick and I, that's the end game is to get on WTF with Mark. We've been trying to get on Marin. This is all been a long, long con. We've been playing to try to get in there. Does he know? Does he know this?

I don't think he has any idea, but when, but he's going to, he's going to find out and we're going to get in there and we're going to get in there. Yeah. Barack Obama sat right here. People can do that with ours. Yeah. Matt Koalik sat right here. Right here.

I got to go. Jenny's changing seats. Frantically. Koalik, maybe having Koalik might be a dad as of as of this recording. Oh my God. Does he want that announced? Wow. What's that?

Does he want people to know that? Uh-oh. I don't know. That is, that's kind of a sensitive thing. Tough luck, buddy. Mitch, can you explain what a drop is though? Jenny still isn't in contact. Koalik's baby comes out and is like, fuck you.

Immediately has no respect for Koalik. You just learned fuck you in the womb. Way to roast a baby. Wow. A drop is so like then I used to do like kind of like welcome the show. Like and then I'd say like, well, isn't that special? And I used to do stuff like that, like little quotes, little quotes. And then and then I didn't I got so lazy and I would I would kind of play

my own, but I got so lazy. I didn't want to do it anymore. And now people send in drops. Oh, is that drop like a real term? Is it something you guys just do? No, it's a real term. That's like a term for like an edited together clip. Yeah.

I think I think it's just something you play like an audio file that you play. Okay. I think comes from radio. Ah, radio. I know very little about broadcasting. Podcasts mother. Yes. Yeah.

Why are not our heart from the loins of Garrison Keeler podcasting was born. Our our dream is to be like a drive time radio duo. That's that is the real one game. Oh, like be on like 98.7 the ride. Yeah. Yes. Maybe you guys would do great burger boy and the spoo spoo spoo spoo. And then I would do little.

I play little drops in there and it would be fun. Yeah, we have a lot. We have. We're talking about boobs at seven a.m. That you host. We show true indifference to them. That's that's that's our drive. That's your thing.

They serve their function next topic. I was going to try to save things about boobs, but I don't know how to even say scientifically what they do. Oh my God, please don't. Please don't. Boobs. What are they? We're going to find out.

No, I did. This was my fault. We've got some Google into do live on the show. Their milk. I know that there's milk involved. That's all I know. Oh boy. Okay.

I'm turning red. Not really. What are you talking about? No, this is kind of your natural complexion is a little normal color. That's my blood pressure is very bad then because I shouldn't be red. Yeah. Constantly. Don't be scared.

I'm sorry. I'm going to be fine. I'm scared and I'm sorry. I'm a woman. You've kind of gotten that this might be a New England thing, Mitch, but you're kind of you're aging into the Ted Kennedy head. The big shut the fuck up. The big pink red head.

Ted head. Yeah. You got Ted head. My head is getting really red. I don't know. I didn't know what to say. My name is Ted. My name is Ted.

My head is red. That a woman I was driving drunk with is dead. Oh my God. But I still took her to bed. Wait a minute. New Jersey. Where did that? It was Andrew Dice Clay came in.

Anyways, yes, we're not going to talk about. Yeah, we're not going to talk about. We're going to talk about food, Nick. You're right, Mitch. We are going to talk about which the breasts do. They are a source of food. That's the food for a certain age group, but not for us. We've grown out of that.

Jenny. Let's talk about it. You talked about this a little bit on the don't boys double episode. You guessed it on one of them, but you ate very, very healthy growing up. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. So you were not going to change restaurants or fast food places at all.

Well, I wasn't like a little bit. I mean, this is like eating healthy in the 80s. Right. Okay. So it was like what we thought. I think, I think, you know, what our parents thought was healthy, which was still like wheat fins and wheat, you know, and like kick cereal and stuff because that's what the government was telling us was healthy, but it probably wasn't.

We mentioned that we mentioned on the show before that it was, there's a weird period. And it's actually a topic today where people said bagels were healthy. Oh, yeah. People get mad at me when we said that people didn't believe it. And I'm like, I'm telling you, it's the true. It was the truth. It's not like my, like it was still the same thing of like red meat and fried foods were still considered bad, which they are.

A lot of the time fried foods are still not good, but like it was specifically red meat. Yeah. And like whole milk. Right. So you want like a, you want a reduced fat or skim milk, things like that. It was a low fat, high carb diet. That's what everyone's saying. Oh, you know what, people?

Yes. What? I was going to say you're going to get mad at me because I'm going to, I'm going to tell you something about what you're doing. Don't. I'm holding the mic. You keep hitting the mic and I think it's going to, the mic's picking it up. No, it's good for the show.

Emma doesn't like, if you're not going to listen to me listen to Emma. Try to stop slapping the mic. You can touch it. Just don't wiggle it. Oh, I have another question. Yes. Where's you song? So you were saying, you were saying earlier, look, we can't get into it right now.

We can't get into it right now. You were saying earlier that now I was going to be like, they fired him online. And you know what? If we did find him, we can do it. We have the authority to do that. We have the authority to do it. If we want to, we could. And I could fire Nick as president of dough boys.

You could, but I still own 50% of the company. Mitch is president. Mitch is president. What are you? I'm vice president. I think I'm vice president and treasurer. And you are president and secretary. Hey, for one percent of your company, I'll give you that Lakers backpack that I have

over there. For one percent of dough boys media. That's a terrible deal. Why? I think you don't understand that we're doing pretty decently. Yeah, but then also I'll have control of the company. You trying to succession me? Yeah.

You can't succession me. I can succession you while I like. I can filibuster right now. For instance, I'll go back to the boobs. Oh, shit. I can't. Oh, no. I'm filibustering boo.

I don't know what that means. So I cut you off because I was talking, I went on tangent about bagels being healthy. But you're talking about 80s healthy food and what you were eating and your chain restaurant habits. It was like a rare thing when you were younger. I guess I think maybe more so than being healthy is because we kept kosher. Oh, got it. Okay.

Like growing up, I had fairly religious parents. Right. So we kept kosher in the house and like, I recall like my dad eating bacon when we would go like Sunday breakfast kind of thing. Oh boy. And I would like, we would occasionally get to go to fast food as a treat, but it would always be Carl's Jr. or Burger King. And then we couldn't get the cheeseburger because that's not kosher.

And I think like at Carl's Jr. also there was, my family had a thing where it's like, Carl's Jr. is the good one for some reason. They viewed it as the good one. And then when we went there. In terms of food quality or as like a company? I'm not, I'm not, I think food, I think health wise they thought that one was the healthy one. Got it.

And then when we went there, we had to get the grilled chicken sandwich. It was like, it's just not a lot of burger. It was the grilled chicken because that's the healthiest option. But I mean, you know, it's not, it's still like really bad for you. I'm looking back at all fast food is terrible and made from pink sludge. Much like the dough boys made from pink sludge. You said pink fudge and Nick and I were looking at me like a hobo in a cartoon. I realized I couldn't fill a bus or anything.

I jokingly went back to the thing that I couldn't fill a bus like couldn't talk about before, but I really can't. I probably couldn't fill a bus or on anything besides like Mario. Maybe. You mean you couldn't say a long uninterrupted string. No. You can like come with monologue. I think you could because you're a good improviser and you have things you're passionate about.

If someone, if you want to talk about, you talked about Mario, other than you care about like Star Wars. If you want to talk about why episode eight is bad, you could talk about that for like an hour straight. Wait, filibustering is like when you talked in order to, for a long time in order to make it so, what? People can't vote. Yeah.

You can't be a vote or something? It's like a Senate procedural thing where you can. Some fucking bullshit. You can keep talking. And if you talk continuously, they can't proceed with regular order. And so it's a way that you can scum up the works and keep business from being done. You could do that. You could 100% do that.

You took for almost an hour and we had lunch yesterday. This is true. And I didn't let you. I went off on talking about stuff and I didn't let Jenny talk at all. It was very rude of me. Yeah. You can, I mean. You even said I'll make up for it tomorrow.

I did. I did. This is the truth. We had it. We hadn't seen each other in a while. We hadn't seen each other. And then I went off on like a tension. And you had much more interesting things to talk about than I did.

That's not true. You just worked on a job and that was fun to hear about. I was rude and I, and I went on for far too long. But wait a minute. I do have something interesting to talk about. Oh yeah. And I didn't say it. Oh.

I met the Sandman last night. You met Adam Sandler? I met Adam Sandler last night. Wow. What was the context? I went and saw Uncut Gems. Very good. It was a good movie.

What's that? Oh, that's a new movie. Yeah. The Safty Brothers movie. They make good time. I liked it. It was good. Uncut Gems.

That's what I call a set of quality European hogs. Oh my God. You could have filibustered on a hog if you wanted to. I know a couple of Uncut Gems. You know what I'm talking about? You know what I'm talking about? Yeah. Some last names after the record.

Dear Lord. The Dose Court is filled up with fucking hog talk. I mean, it's not like people are posting just like pics of hogs. There's some hog talk. There's a bunch of hog talk going on in there. Yeah. It's a topic of interest. It makes me feel bad.

Oh. Are you talking Oinkers or? Boinkers. They're not supposed to be that big. It's not natural. I think the flaccid size is overly obsessed with by men in general. Yeah. It's supposed to be compact and tiny.

Anyways, moving on. I don't know what you're talking about. That's better. I met Sandler Wyger. Oh yeah. Don't mess it up with Pog Top. You're at the Uncut Gem Screening. What was he wearing?

How'd he look? He was wearing basketball shorts. Okay. And he looked cool as hell. Cool. Adina Mazzell was there. Whoa. Safdie Brothers were there.

Is she in that? She's in it. Yeah. Well, now I'm seeing it. Kevin Garnett's in it, right? Kevin Garnett does a great job. Yeah. And it's set in like 2012 or something like that?

Okay. Oh, what a funny time. I don't know that I could pinpoint anything that was from 2012. The company was in Binders Full of Women. Oh, right. That's what I remember. Yeah. The good old days.

Remember when that was a scandal? Yeah. This guy's unelectable. My father had just passed away. That's what I know about that year in 2012. Sorry. That is a memorable year. I mean, like in just the way that I'm like, what happened that year?

I'm like, oh yeah, that's the year that happened. Yeah. So a shitty year, but for me, but also the Celtics, I think, were in the playoffs and there's like, I won't get into the movie too much, but I met Sandler. Very cool. And he's cool. I was on. I was on love and he was like, oh, with Apatow.

It was great. He was nice to me. Oh, that's nice. Did you talk? What did you? What else do you say? I mean, like I was. What did you say?

What did you say? I gotta say that I played it cool. I did play it cool, but I was genuinely extremely nervous and he was like cool and was like, like, was like, who have you guys like worked with whatever? And I forgot to say Bob Odenkirk. Oh, yeah. I was like, I forgot to say I had a sketch with Bob Odenkirk. Who's the guy that he clearly has known for years.

It's easy to forget things like that in the moment. Is it? I was. I was. Do you feel pressure to like say your resume or like say, like, this is why you should talk to or like, this is why I matter. No, that's, that's, that was how I got my foot in the door was that I was like, I basically brought up someone that he knew and he and then he was like, oh, yeah.

And then he was nice to me and bug main. Whoa. Very exciting. And, uh, and then, uh, and then he and he was any and you could tell that he was and then he could tell that he was like more interested in talking to us who were like comedians than the weird group of people who if I don't know if you've ever been to one of these. Like a premier.

It was a WGA screen. I don't know if you've ever been to a WGA screening, but they are nightmares. Yeah. So this is like the writers union out here in Hollywood and they have free screenings for members and just like how can I put this? It's like the most disgusting human beings on earth go to them. A lot of weird people go to attend these things like 60, 70 year old like husband and wife do us who are just like talking throughout the movie and like think that

that's like think the movie is like owed to them or whatever. Right. They were there. It was a Charles and charge staff writer from the 80s who's still in the writers union and at this is in his seventies and now just likes a deal. Like I can go see a movie for free. Yeah. I deserve this.

Right. Yeah. It was. I mean, it was great. I was very nervous. I was afraid to talk to him, but he was very nice and seemed like he would have talked more, but I kind of like cut it off or I was like, hey, great job. See you later.

You know what I mean? I didn't and I didn't want to overstay. Of course. Yeah. No. Well, that's cool. That's great. Yeah.

A little bit with the Sandman. It's cool that he was like available to meet. Yeah. He was out there. He came out and said hello and stuff like that. He was so he was so much cool. We were me and bug main were saying that like of all the people in the audience and like even the interviewer and then Sandler on stage.

He was like a multi, you know, like a multi multi-millionaire. He was still more normal than like so many of the people surrounding us. Right. And the interviewer on stage like he like there were so many weirdos in the audience and like this guy who's a multi-millionaire. Yeah. A billionaire is like the is the most normal of them all. I know that up.

Sandler is almost a billionaire. I mean, he's got a lot of money. Of what? All right. Half a billionaire. I don't know. I wonder what his actual net worth is. All right.

You know what? The net worth hit us up with a hashtag sand man money bags and whoever gets closest will get a prize. Sand man money bags. We should try to get them on the show at some point. I'd love to have the same man in here. I don't think he does podcasts. Let me ask you this.

What did bug main say to Adam Sandler? Bug main was just shaking his hand as I walked over. Oh, you did it first. Bug made Adam Sandler before you. He did just a second before me. Is Adam Sandler now part of the extended bug main universe? God, I hope not. Is he coming to is he coming to bug con 2020?

I kind of hope so. Sandler rules. Anyways, that was my big exciting news. I know it was boring. That's great. That's amazing. That's cool. It was fun to meet a hero.

Yeah. They say never meet your heroes, but you say meet them. Meet them. Why not? Why are I sad for you that Jeffrey Epstein passed away? All right. And your pantheon of heroes. Where to like, like, so you Adam Sandler knows up there.

Tom Brady's up there. Tom Cruise is up there. You've met all three of these people. Tom Cruise is a hero. I have. I did meet Tom Cruise. Wow. I met all three of them.

That's your triforce of heroes? Yeah. You've met all of them? I've met all of them. Well, you met Tom Cruise? Yes. I put my hand on his back and he didn't respond for two straight minutes. What went and where?

At the MTV Movie Awards. Oh my gosh. When? Like a long time ago? 2010 maybe? 2009. One of my first like real writing jobs. Oh, that's funny.

And he just let you have your hand on his back for a while. He didn't. He sat that way for he didn't. He truly didn't respond to my hand on his back because Dave Ferguson took a picture with right and I put my hand on his back and he did not respond. He was like internally thinking why is someone putting a novelty number one foam finger on your gigantic meaty bear paws. And then so I just after two minutes I just slid my hand off of him.

Oh boy. And I walked away. And he had a like a slick oil mark on his back. When he gets home he's like my fucking suits ruined. So you're like you've got you've got all those heroes knocked off like you hit all of them. I haven't met Cruise. I touched Cruise. Okay.

So you haven't had a conversation with Cruise. So that's still that's still a pending question in your queue. That's very exciting. Left. I don't know. Who else? Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice would be cool to me.

Like the character or the axe or Michael Keaton. The character. Oh, I guess I could just go to you. That's possible. You can hide it. Universal. Yeah. Easy.

Who else? I don't know. There's probably some more. I'll think of them. Mario. Yeah. All right. Who are you?

Who are yours? I would love to meet President Barack Obama. Okay. No, actually, I don't think I don't think that much. I think I would like to meet. I would like to meet Karim Abdul-Jabbar. Oh, he's cool. I'd like to meet Shigeru Miyamoto, the designer of Mario.

Zelda. I'd like to meet Miyamoto too. And then that might be it. I'm trying to think if there's anyone else who really want to meet. Your friend, Mitch, got a video from Karim Abdul-Jabbar. I know. It was very cool. You got me a cameo.

Which, as of this recording, just came out last week timely. Yeah, very cool. Wait, didn't he just write? Somebody told me he wrote a book, like a fiction novel. He wrote on Veronica Maher. He's another person you might see at a WGA screening. He's amazing. Yeah, he's great.

Karim's great. He can do everything. Yeah, he's great. It's a bummer in some ways. All-time leading score in NBA history and also just like a weird man who's weird intellectual. I like him. I like Karim Alon. You called someone weird?

No wonder he's your hero. Another. The king of weirds. Okay, so let's talk. So, growing up, your diet was pretty regimented. You had a little bit of Carl's Jr. You had some Burger King, but not a lot of chains. Yeah.

As an actor, you end up like a thing that I think happens a lot, especially when people are coming up as actors as you're acting a lot of commercials. I've seen you in a ton of commercials. Yes, thank you. Have you done some food commercials? What? No, I'm not saying that's not the only thing you've accomplished in your career. In a real way.

Okay, great. I appreciate it. But I've seen you in a lot of commercials and you've been in some food commercials. What is that experience like? Yeah. What ones can you think of? Well, the very first commercial that I ever did was for Cheetos. Whoa.

And my family members to this day, this was probably like 13. No, maybe not that long ago, at least 10 years ago, if not more. And my family members still to this day are like, so you still get boxes of Cheetos? They think that like I get a lifetime supply of Cheetos. I'm like, no, I got money. I got paid for that. I think, were you in the commercial with Chester Cheeto? I was in the commercial with Chester Cheeto himself.

Chester Cheeto. We were talking about puppets earlier. I remember this commercial. You do? Yeah, because you were UCB and this would make sense. Yeah. I guess it was like, that was like a cool big deal. I remember Neil Campbell's rock, paper, scissor, Budweiser's Super Bowl commercial.

I keep track of the commercial. Joel Spence's Jack in the Box commercial. That's right. By the way, Oscar Montoya is in a Jack in the Box commercial that just aired last night. Very exciting. Oh, cool. Good for him. Yeah, you brought up Chester Cheeto and I think that's the third person I add to my

list of celebrity heroes. Wow. I'd like to meet him. How was he? Very nice. Oh, that's cool. We were playing piano together, I believe. Oh, yeah.

He was like Earth Bit. And the puppeteers were playing, having him play piano. I thought it was cool. Very cool. Is he a, like was this British Chester Cheeto or was this the old school like kind of like edgy Chester Cheeto, Broly Chester Cheeto? I guess he had sunglasses on, but he was more friendly. Like he was an actual puppet.

That maybe later they went in and like animated a little bit more or something and they definitely took out like the strings that were from the puppeteers. They retconned kind of Chester Cheeto's persona. He used to be kind of like this Broly sort of, I think surfer dude slash rock. He was a poochie and now he's like a aristocrat, sort of like a British guy. But he's got the same look. It's disorienting. I've never done a fast food commercial though.

You haven't. No. There's a time where you have to like go in the audition and eat a whole bunch of chicken nuggets and they'll be like, if you're a vegan, you better leave. They make you eat in the audition? Yeah. Yeah. Where are these auditions?

Yeah, I was going to say. I'm sorry. I need to start going over. 200 South Leprecha. That's crazy that they'd have you actually eat. Yeah, you have to kind of like do literally exactly. I feel that there's not a lot of imagination in the casting of commercials that you have to like, you're doing exactly what they would have you do.

Like the other day, I did one where I sat on a bus and did thought about nothing and they just had me do that for like two minutes. That's weird. I've never done a commercial before. You've never done a commercial. Do you audition for them? I audition for them like, I've auditioned, but I probably have auditioned for like a dozen commercials total, I think. Oh, wow. I'm really surprised.

Is that by design? I hated going to Santa Monica was a part of my. Oh, yeah. The opposite of Nick anti Nick here. See, you could you could go to a lot of fast. That's true. It's where I live, but I didn't I didn't like going to Santa Monica, so I didn't really do them as much, especially when I was working. When I had a job and like had to sneak out for auditions, it was already hard enough and they get so mad if I left.

Oh, that like with commercial auditions. I'm like, I'm just not going to go out first, but I'll still go. Occasionally, I'll still go out for like one. I went up for a Nintendo one. How exciting. A Nintendo like a Zelda one or something. You know, I think I think you'd be good at is if they have the Brony paper towel company ever decides that they want their mascot to have like a loser son. If Brony paper towel man has like a Hunter Biden Hunter Biden.

I'm not as bad as Hunter Biden. He can't soak up anything. Maybe maybe maybe you know, maybe I'll get a commercial in 2020. I'm saying that like you as it's very, very hard to do. I think every actor should go out even not every writer like anybody should because if you get one, it's very lucrative. Right. And it pays your bills. And you know, I've never done a.

Do you know what I think about myself? That's all I want to hear your thought. I'm just going to say I've never done a commercial, but I did do a McDonald's Web ad and I was a and I was like a a nerd who wishes for a Big Mac. I think was what it was and what it was. And but the thing was I had to hold like a camera Big Mac, which is like an ornate work of art. It's like holding a Faberge egg because they have like food. They're the McDonald's team. They're like sculpting this precise thing.

Yeah. Fucking give it a Mr. Spills. Yeah, I know. It was very, it was very, very nerve wracking. I was like holding the football that has the nuclear codes and and you have they also like the note I kept getting. I think because at one point they realized like, oh, we're not going to get it. You know, you know, you should be the only person who can hold the football that has nuclear codes. Tom Brady.

You have to retire from the New England Patriots. Not worth it. So I had a so. But the thing they tell you the note they give you is that you have to clock the burger so that three points of cheese are visible at all times. Wow. Which is very, very stressful too. Because it's all I'm thinking about is I'm trying to act and I can I can not act. What I'm trying to do is I'm trying to act and while also showing three points of cheese at the camera lens.

That's hard. It kind of teaches you how to be very technical. Commercials do. I appreciate that about them. And also these brands have specific ways you have to like do things. Do you remember that pepsi? I think like campaign that we did for funnier die like a lot of years ago. I directed a bunch of those.

Yeah, where it was like just like a bunch of actors and we had to look at people's Facebook profiles who had like submitted. And then we would go into a room and like do a spoof of them or like we would do like an impression of them or something. This was for some crazy. I think the brand was Pepsi next that Pepsi was Pepsi next. And so it was like you were it was you'd have like a carrot. You'd have like like you'd be you acting in it and you got this person's Facebook profile who submitted like Melissa Johnson. And Melissa Johnson says in her Facebook profile that she you know loves dogs and likes and likes to go water skiing. And then so you'd go up there and do an impression.

That's all the information you have. You'd be like my name is Melissa and I love dogs so much. I want to marry a dog. It was like such a rose to a person you never knew. Yeah, but this is like a flashback to like 2010. This was exactly the exact era. Definitely 2010. But there was a specific way you had to drink and then at the end of your bit you had to drink take a sip of the Pepsi.

And there's like a specific Pepsi sip that you have to do like it's a double take. Oh, yeah. It's like a half sip and then and then a bigger goal. Yeah. And then you show the logo of the can. It was very specific. It was like you had to nail that. Do you know what I think the issue is with me?

What? I think I'm too fat for commercials. I think I'm too fat for commercials. I don't think so. I'm a little too monstrous. They don't want me. I think that I I'm too big. I see a lot of big guys around commercial casting places.

You were just in a movie. Don't don't stress out over not being in commercials. It's fine. It is fine. But I do think if you want to, you should just go out for them because it doesn't hurt. You know what I mean? What else are you going to do? That's true.

Yeah. What else do you do in a day? A lot. You get one commercial a week. That's nothing. I do a lot of stuff. I'm so busy. Right.

Wags. Yes. I forgot when you brought up filibustering. The birthday boys had a show called Thrilla bus. I remember Thrilla Buster. You're follow up to a hot dog and right? That's right. Yeah.

That was the name. I don't remember that. It was not. It was not as memorable as some others. You were in a birthday boy show. You didn't you do them like the live show? I believe I did a few. Yes.

I think you maybe did the most of anyone possibly. Oh my God. Could it be? I think so. Why the birthday girl? And why you're speaking of old sketch bullshit that no one cares about. Didn't you also do a commercial audition sketch or something? Oh, yeah.

Or you drink bleach? Yeah. That was a... Yeah. That was an old... I don't think you can find that online anymore. That was like an old UCB comedy sketch that Justin Donaldson directed. That it was just like me audition...

Oh, an agent tells me that you don't stop acting until the director says cut. And so I take that as interpretation. I'm trying to remember it. So he's... Oh, this is what it is. My guy is an idiot. And the commercial... You always play idiots.

Yeah. I play idiots or insufferable nerds. Either my exact type or against my type. So the agent says... I think they're both your type. So the agent, Mike Cassidy, an excellent actor is playing my agent. And he's like, I want to represent you. So the secret to acting, to auditioning is you don't stop acting until they say cut.

So let's say you're in a burger commercial. You're auditioning for a burger commercial. Take a bite of the burger and then you're like, hmm, that's good. I'm going to keep eating it. And then I take that as a note that I'm supposed to do that for every single commercial. So it ends up that I'm like, for a remote... Universal remote, so I eat the remote. Oh, eat the remote.

And then it's bleach. And then I drink bleach. But I drink bleach for like a full minute. Oh. Yeah. That's cool. I mean, it's not good. It wasn't good.

I don't know why I spent all this time describing it. You should have had real bleach on set. Capture death on camera. Yeah, some for my throat and then some for the audience's eyes after I've been watching. Jen, we got to talk about this. Yes. What? You're in a commercial.

You're in a commercial and you play one of the Snapple fruits. Yes. Yes. But this is... I think this is... I have a diet Snapple right in front of me. Oh, yeah. Yeah, you do.

A half and half. Very clear, by the way. What's a half and half? Like Arnold Palmer? Oh, but they can't say Arnold Palmer? Is that a trademarked? I think, yeah, you can't say Arnold Palmer. Oh, interesting.

Or as Nick says, the Nick Weiger. Yeah. If you make it with a little bit more iced tea, it's a Nick Weiger. Oh. Two thirds, one third. That's my preferred way of drinking an Arnold Palmer. Just a little bit of lemonade. And you've been drinking it.

That's how Arnold Palmer likes his... That's how he makes it. I know that butthole says half and half. Oh, God. You're in a Snapple commercial. I was in a Snapple commercial. You were the Snapple... I was an apple.

An apple. That's cool as hell. Yeah. It's cool. No, I'm so thankful for it. It was really like... We were talking about... A kind of like, through commercial work, have learned or gotten to do weird things that

I don't think I will get to do maybe in theatrical stuff, whereas this was a full prosthetic face. Yeah. I'm puppeteering arms and it was cool. I said that to you yesterday. I was like, you were in a Snapple commercial and you were like, you knew who was me in that commercial? I recognized your voice and the commercials.

You can hear your voice. Oh. And then I was like, holy shit. Did they put you in a bunch of prosthetics? Which, yes, they did. Yeah. It's insane how much... They turned you into an apple basically.

It was kind of amazing. It was really impressive. I had to go into a special effects studio and get a full matte, like a Goop mask. Wow. You know, where they pour green Goop and then plaster mask, your whole entire head. It was my whole entire head and back, but it's just like you can only breathe out your nose. Did Gwyneth Paltrow give it to you?

I wish. It was a Goop bath, Lager. It would have been over my vagina. I'd be like, this is good for you. I'm like, there's cumin in this. You said it was terrifying. It was pretty scary. I didn't expect it.

They said it was a fitting. Oh, wow. I didn't know. And I get there and they're like, this is what's happening. And I definitely would have taken it out of hand, that I know. Yeah. Because it's like climbing a cluster. It just makes you nervous.

I would definitely panic if I was in that situation. It was like a scenario where I was like, you have to keep cool. Like there's definitely been a lot of those over the course of my career. Yeah. But where I'm like, you need to be cool. You have got to keep your shit together, Jenny. You need to be cool. You need to be cool.

And just like, that's enough to make me keep my cool, I guess. This is going through my head last night with Sandler, honestly. It was the same thing. Oh, just like, be cool. Be cool. You're fine. You're fine. Everything's okay.

Yeah. That's so good. I mean, you're right. Sophie, how many people get to say that they were a fruit like that? I mean, I genuinely, this is very. Five people. Five people. I'm trying to do the math here and head size.

So if Jenny was an apple. Oh, you piece of shit. You could be a watermelon. I could show you a picture. Yeah. Do you have one? Yeah, I do. Oh, very excited.

I'll show you later. I want to be a watermelon the long way or the wide way. Okay. Somehow both. The long way. Like I'm saying, like, would it go out? Would it make a shape like that? Oh.

Or would it go up? Maybe one of those like seedless water mounds that are perfectly round. What a fucker. So beyond your work in acting with food, what is your on set eating routine? Like if you have to, if you, you know, you're on a commercial shoot or if you're on a TV show and you're there all day, it's a 12 hour shoot. There's all sorts of snacks around. There's catering for lunch.

What is your strategy for dealing with that? And I have a follow up question to that. Okay, great. I'm going to say right now, because it's stupid. Were there snapples available during the Snapple shoot? That's a great question. Totally. I had to drink one on set like with the puppeteered stick arm.

Oh, that's fucking crazy. We had to drink it. It was very good. I hadn't had one maybe since junior high. They're very good. I love them. Yeah, they're great. What was your question?

My question was, what do you do on set food wise, like in terms of eating? Oh, well, it used to be like go nuts. It used to be like do whatever you want. This is your time. Because it's free food and you're being paid to be there. Yeah. And I, you know, I would be, you know, one or two days or something on set. So it would be like, Oh, if I'm on set, I would allow myself to just go buck wild and

eat everything. But then my a couple, when was this couple years, few years ago, my first experience being like a regular on a show where I'm there every single day. And it took a toll like because they were bringing out nachos, wings, chicken nuggets. And I remember like, it became like a running joke. Like someone would announce a food and they'd be like, Jenny, go get it. I'd be like, Ooh, what? She's gone.

There's food like food at the crafty here or whatever. And then like, I don't know, a few weeks. Cause I think it was like a three or four month long, you know, shoot, you know, shooting experience and like a few weeks in, I remember like some people who worked on set being like, like very nicely being like, you know, you kind of have to pace yourself because like energy wise, you're just going to start. And I did like, I could feel it. Like by the end of the day, I didn't have any energy.

Like you're really like, right? And bloated and like weighed down with junk. And I wasn't even hungry. Yeah. You just do it to kind of like, I kind of had to have a talking to like about it, which kind of sucked a little bit. Like the principle of the film set came and was like, you can't be doing this. Yeah.

You can't eat like this. And I was like, Oh, no, no, it's very hard. I was eating terribly on when I was filming in Atlanta. And then I would. Oh yeah. Just recently. Yeah. But you know what?

It was probably, was it really good crafty? It was, you know what? They, there was good crafty and then they changed crafty and then the crafty was really, really good. Yeah. But they would just do snacks. It was hard. We, we did French hours where you don't stop for lunch.

You just film all the way. French hour. Yeah. I've never heard that term. Yeah. They told me about it. I know it's very strange. Do the French naughty lunch?

I don't know what they do. Those fucking freaks. No wonder why. No wonder why we've burned down there. Fucking Notre Dame. French hour sounds like a game you'd play to sleep over. Vlogger. What kind of game?

Hey, buddy. Is anyone want to play French hour? I just invented it. We eat a lot of cheese. Is that if you were sleeping over with Urkel? Man, I wish. I wish I was as cool as Urkel. Let's go through your head.

French hour is where you don't stop. There's no like real break for lunch. Oh, wow. Whenever you can. This is a Paul Feig thing, I understand. That's what he does on his sets. Interesting. That's hard.

I know. It seems like I'd rather have the lunch break. Especially for like set crew. Yeah. It's hard to, and it's sometimes hard to eat like that. Right. That makes sense. I saw the Ghostbusters answer the call and Slimer was like really thin.

Oh, I shouldn't have liked my own joke right there. I liked it. It was bad as hell. So now my thing is like I top load at the beginning, like I eat like a big breakfast burrito and then like healthy like salad or especially if I'm working all day. That's smart.

And it helps with energy. Right. So that food's not for, I feel like it's for crew. Yeah. Like it's not really for us. It is for you two though. It is. It is.

Yeah. Whoever shamed you and said that you were going to get the food too, fuck this person. I know, it did feel a little shamy. It made me upset for a couple of days. So there's just people at this screening last night, some guy was like, you want me to get you a razor? And I was like, I'm like, I told him, I was like,

I'm growing my beard out for like a roll. I had to tell him that. Wait, he said that to you like unprompted? Yeah. Just some guy randomly said that to roast you? Yeah, to roast me. Did he know who you were? You were?

No, just a random. This was the 70 year old guy we were talking about. A random guy, a fucking random ass 70 year old guy. Right. His arena. Wrote for wings for six seasons. It's that weird thing of when people think they can call, it's like, yeah, I know I go and get the snacks,

but I fucking, I don't have anything else to do. Well, it's nobody's fucking business. Yeah, no shit. Like don't talk about your body, don't talk about anything about you. Yes, yes. Like. Mitch though, do you want me to get you a razor?

Are you really growing it out for a roll or is that? Save off my pew, bitch. We'll take a break. Welcome back to Dough Boys. We are here with a great Jenny Pearson and our chain this week is Noah's New York Bagels. I want to say a quick thing. Oh my gosh, I forgot we were having to talk about that too.

Yeah, which also a fun. We'll get to it. I at the end of the day, I take home two mini Gator aides. That was my little thing. Oh, the mini Gator aides. I take two of them on the for the road. Oh, good for you.

You need to hydrate. All right. Yeah. And I do zero sometimes. So it would be zero calories. I know Gator aides are bad for you. Sometimes I take a full doggy bag of snacks. Yeah.

Yeah. Just go raid the table. There's free food at work. Take stuff to go. Yeah. 100%. So the. So Noah's was founded in Berkeley, California.

1989 by a New York expat. It's now owned. And this I learned. In the con. And while researching this, Mitch, and neither of us knew this. It's now owned by a lawyer. And it's now owned by a lawyer.

And neither of us knew this. It's now owned by a larger chain. Einstein Brothers bagels, which I always thought was a competitor. We didn't reveal this to you. This is a big reveal. It's a big reveal. I did not know that.

That is interesting. Yeah. They bought them out a few years ago. And they're now 38. Noah's locations, but they are all under the Einstein Brothers umbrella, although it operates as a separate, a separate company.

And then each location has distinct names, which you'll, which you'll see if you go to these. So I want to start more generally, about bagels. I don't think we've done a straight up bagel place. We have not. Oh, that's exciting.

I mean, we've done like, we've done Dunkin' Donuts in a couple other places, but obviously those aren't straight up bagel spots. Yes. We've done, we've done places that are, that are, that are close to this, but not straight up bagels, which by the way,

I just want to say. Yeah. One of my favorite foods is a boy. Oh. The bagel. I love, I love a bagel and cream cheese. You were a bagel boy.

I was a bagel boy. You know what else? I was also a bagel boy. I had bagel for breakfast for a long stretch of childhood. Yeah. And you know, and I mentioned this before on, and it's disgusting,

but my ba, the way I'd have a bagel is I would have a toasted bagel, usually an egg bagel with, with a layer of margarine and then a layer of cream cheese on top of that. This is disgusting. And then a layer of jam on top of that. Oh.

Yeah. You're sick. I'm gonna oppose to that. It was, I mean, it was a lot. I don't need that. Mrs. Tufo made bagels like that a lot. Mrs. Tufo being my friend's mom, she made bagels.

She would, she would, she would make bagels with cream cheese and I think grape jelly on top of it. And I think that she did put a little layer of butter under it, Nick. Yeah. So that's not, and I remember being really damn good.

It's good. You know what? I won't shame you on that either. That's good. It's good at just too much. But what bagels were you eating? Were you eating grocery store bagged bagels? Oh yeah.

I only had grocery store bagels until I was an adult. That was all we were having was whatever. I gotta say something here. The Thomas's bagel or whatever that brand was. Oh wow. I have, I have a big stance. That's not a bagel. Okay.

I have a stance to make here about bagels. First of all, I think that bagels have gotten store brand bagels. I've gotten worse. Yeah. I think so. My mom, my mom buys the Thomas brand and then they,

they just did it. They did like, they redid them and they're kind of better now and like a little bit softer. And they toast up. I know. Hold on. I know.

I'm with you. But they taste like metal or something. I think that frozen bagels are actually the better bagel. The one that used to come frozen in the bag. I think that those bagels are better. They're more like, there's something about them that just tastes like, like regular bagel.

Like, like, do you remember how they had frozen bagels? Do people remember this? I had never encountered frozen bagels. I mean, I've frozen bagels. I've taken bagels and put them in the freezer. I've never bought frozen bagels. I've had friends ship me bagels from New York and then I freeze them so that I can hold them longer.

They're, they're used to, the bagels used to come in like, in the, in the, like the grocers freezer. Yes. They'd be in bags and they'd be frozen. I've never seen that. I've never seen that.

Is that a Boston thing? I don't think I've ever seen that either. That maybe, is that a Quincy thing? No, no. This is, am I insane? I don't think you're insane. I think this is a thing that happens and maybe what,

maybe the reason they taste better to you is because they don't have to have as many preservatives because they don't have to be designed for shelf, shelf storage. They're meant to be frozen. This sounds like a thing in a town where there's no juice. I know like gluten free breads are often frozen. Well, you're not wrong.

You're not wrong. Describe Quincy. Yeah. Pretty well. There, there were maybe like two Jewish kids in my, in like all of my middle school. I remember when I was growing up. Oh my gosh.

And were you, did they, were they religious? I think some of them were. Did you ever go to like a bar mitzvah growing up? I never went to a bar mitzvah growing up. Oh, wait. Maybe you know what? The biscotties, my, my mom was friends with Mrs. Bisconti

and Amy Bisconti and we went over there and we like celebrated Hanukkah a little bit. That's fine. But I don't know. I don't think I ever went to a bar mitzvah. Maybe I went to Joe's bar mitzvah. I don't know. You would have killed at a bar mitzvah, I feel.

Yeah. Yeah. I would have, it would have been fun. There's a lot of games. Yeah. I feel like you would have been funny. Yeah. Maybe you should go.

Find one and go. Crash one Mitch. Now to this day, you think I'll still be funny if I go? Yes. Hey everybody. Very. Whoa.

This guy in his late thirties is cool. Jenny, so you must have some, it seems like you already have some strong opinions on bagels coming in. I do. So talk to us about that. I don't want to say me too. Look.

Okay. I know that I'm not. Okay. I know that I am a very Catholic boy, but I have always loved bagels and I have strong bagel opinions. I'm with you. I guess you live closer to the East Coast,

which means like, I didn't have an actual good bagel. I feel like until I was an adult, like a New York bagel. I like, I pretty much ate Noah's growing up because I didn't know they started in Berkeley. So it makes sense because I'm from San Jose.

Yes. They popped up pretty soon when I was like young. Right. Like in San Jose, but we did have like a local bagel store that I recall going to and I was young that we would go get a dozen like on weekends. But it was like,

it was like a definitely weekly thing because I had to go like every Saturday to synagogue like services. And then after services, there was a kid-ish, which is like a lunch, like after the services. And there was always bagels, locks,

tuna salad, egg salad. Like it's like the same foods over and over. So I definitely had at least a bagel a week. Oh, I would, I truly, even from when I was like six years old, I used to have bagels every morning, like truly every morning.

That was like the grab and go. Yeah. And I would show up the greens down the street would watch me. Mr. Green, I'd show up with a bagel every day. Yeah. And then like I wouldn't have one.

He'd be like, where's your bagel? And I would like open up my sweatpants and pull it out of my pants. Eww, like it was around your dick. It wasn't around my, my prepubescent dick. It was toasted.

If your pants, it'd be like going. It was like, I guess it was in my underwear. It was fun. I was a little funny guy. That was, that was a bit you were doing.

It was like a little funny bit I was doing. He's like, cause I would sometimes hold it behind my back and then one day I put it in my pants. And did this teacher find it funny? And the guy thought, oh yeah, Mr. Green, he's a great guy.

Me and Joe Griggy, who was the nicest man on earth. What was the bagel? Like you were bringing like a cold, uncut bagel. No, it was cooked with cream cheese on it. Cooked with cream cheese and it spread. Or butter on it.

It had cream cheese on it and it was in your pants. Yeah. I don't know. You were going to take it out and then you would eat it in front of him? First of all, at six years old and now, there's plenty of room down there.

It wasn't an issue. But then there's no hair or anything going on down there. I don't know. It was funny. I think that's the issue. It's not just hair. More of just like, you know, pee pee and poo poo.

It was funny. Mr. Green left. It was a funny moment. It sounds like a funny thing for a little boy to do. It sounds great. It was, you're just jealous you didn't see it why.

Jesus Christ. I think I would have been traumatized when I was twelve year old. It was funny. You know, I think I did have it with butter for quite a while. Like if we didn't have cream cheese, I butter.

But here's the thing I was going to say bagels, probably the biggest Jewish crossover food. Right. I mean, like it's the most popular. It's one of the most popular. Bagels are one of the most popular foods on earth. I wouldn't go that far.

It's gone. You wouldn't go that far. One of the most popular foods on earth. Why not? I mean, like your burgers pizza bagels are in there. I feel like you're ignoring like ice cream.

Ice cream. You're ignoring an entire hemisphere. What hemisphere? Well, like, do you think how many bagels are being consumed in like the Indian subcontinent? Yeah. It's only America.

Yeah. They're actually an American invention. Okay. It was like, like, Russian, Polish Jews or something brought it over. Wow.

Like, and just like started making up here out of, I can't remember the exact story. This is very not interesting. But it was like, they started in New York. That is interesting. Like,

like Polish Jews or something. I'm not going to ignore continents. I meant American foods. Okay. Okay. That's fine. I'm going to change to American foods. American foods.

The foods that matter. Yeah. Hell yeah. Bagels went viral, if you will. Bagels did go viral. They went viral before the internet went viral. In a way,

those Russian immigrants were the first fine stars. Oh, they did all live in the same apartment building that burned to the ground. Look, bagels are delicious. Yes. They're,

they're, they're a top breakfast food. They're great. But I would argue that those bag bagels that you were eating are not, in fact, bagels. They are not great.

Which bag ones? The frozen ones I have or the Thomas ones? Sallie, Meyers, or what, you know, like,

yeah, I know what you mean. Duggan, Hines, or whatever. Yeah. I'm trying to, I'm trying to remember the brands that we would get,

but I know definitely Thomas for a time. Thomas, Sallie, what's that Sallie one? I don't know which one you're talking about. Sallie? Sallie. Yeah.

There's Sallie bagels. There was another one we were getting for a while, but yeah, they are not, they're like bagel approximations. And I would not eat one of those except under duress. If I have a fresh bagel is available to me, that is always superior for sure.

So let's do a quick rundown. What types of bagels do you like? What, how toasted do you go? And what spreads do you like? Great. Okay. My favorite bagel isn't,

well, I guess it depends, right? It, my favorite bagel isn't everything bagel, but only if it's lightly toasted, because then you get the crispy little onion bits, crispy, and that's good.

If it's not, then I go for like a poppy or a sesame, but just like the classic ones. Right. So I've been fruit bagels. I don't believe a blueberry bagel is a real bagel. I'm kind of like juey like that. Yeah.

And then I'll eat it lightly toasted with cream cheese, with cream cheese, or lately I have had some leftover everything bagels and toasted them and put butter on it, and it's like real melty, and it's really good. I do like, I've discovered also in my 30s,

I've discovered the bagel with butter, like just butter, and it's delightful sometimes. It's delicious. It's a great change of pace. Yeah. But you were saying that, I mean cream cheese.

I mean, I like a locks cream cheese. Okay. I like a chive cream cheese. I like a veggie cream cheese. So this is an issue I got a lot of pushback for You're wrong. You just admit it now. on social media.

I said that I did not like veggie cream cheese, and I went a little blue to say so, and people were very, very vigorously disagreeing. Do you want me to read the tweet? Yeah. Okay. Veggie cream cheese?

Fuck that. Give me, come on a plate. Whoa. That's not the tweet. That's not, that's not what I tweeted out. Oh, sorry. That was, that was my drafts.

I just said fuck veggie cream cheese, and people took issue with that. Why do you like veggie cream cheese? I just like, I don't know, which I like the bits. I like crunchy bits. You like the texture. Yeah, I like crunchy bits and things,

and also like it feels. Oh, you like crunchy bitch, do you? I like a little crunchy bitch. I was with a, I couldn't, I couldn't think of a word of the British slang for a woman. A fit bird. I was with a bird last night,

and she has some great crunchy bits, mate. That is gross. What the fuck are you describing? I put cream cheese on a muffin. Oh God. What muffin? And this show is huge on the BBC.

Yeah. Number one. Wow. Crunchy bits. Brought to you by kind of toys. I don't even have anything funny. I know so little.

See, I am bad at improv. I'm better on stage. I think that my brain works better. You're doing fine. Let's shut up. Don't say that. It makes me sound like a fool. I think I used to get lenders bagels.

You as a boy. I think those were the froce. Look, someone's got to help me out here. I need. I need a listener help. We used to get a frozen bagel brand. I think it was lenders. But there was a horse and a grocery store.

It just took bagels and put them in the freezer. That's a possibility. No, no, no, no. They were like, we don't have any more room in the bread aisle. This is not what happened. They came in the grocers freezer. Wait, a horse and buggy might be Thomas's.

So I think that's wrong, but it was like maybe it was lenders, but it was an onion bagel and then the letters were green because it was an onion bagel. I remember that specifically. All right. If you think, you know, take a screenshot or send a pic. Tweet a pic at us at Doughboy's pod.

Hashtag frozen bagel Sherlock. Yes. Wow. I like it. Thank you. Look, frozen bagels were that's what I grew up on when I was young, young, young. And then I respect that.

And then Dunkin Donuts then had bagels and I look, I know that people will scoff at Dunkin Donuts bagels now, but when they first came out, they used to cook them in store. Okay. And they were good. They were, they were better than they, than they are.

Crispy on the outside, soft on the inside. They were basically. Yes. They were, they were, they were, they were good quality bagel and then it's gone. Whatever. Onion was my number one growing up. I was actually playing the adventure to onion.

And then now I will do plain or onion, but I'll get like either a plain cream cheese or a chive cream cheese or onion and chive cream cheese. Love it. I love it. Yeah, that's good. Or whipped Philadelphia cream cheese sent us some cream cheese wager because of that thing.

And they sent, they sent a whipped onion and chive and a whipped chive. Ooh, I like a whipped cream cheese. Yeah. My favorite though of the three was the onion and chive regular, not whipped cream cheese. It was my favorite. It was very good.

Sounds good. You weren't supposed to eat that. We were supposed to throw out the dumpster because the Du Bois can't be bought. Philadelphia cream cheese is trying to buy you. They're trying to buy us off. They're trying to buy the podcast. You should do it.

Yeah, we should. We should do it. What is the end date here? What are you doing? No. I love to not have to eat shitty food every week and just get a big buyout from the Philadelphia cream cheese corporation.

That would be great. That would be delightful. But who would host? They would replace you as hosts? Yeah, I think they'd probably bring in some ringers. Cream cheese boys? The cream cheese boys. Couple cream cheese boys from the work of the

factory over there. Yeah. Just, you know. You know, a susser is going to jump in. It's going to be the fucking deli boys. Rick and bitch. You know what? Rick and bitch are great names for the deli boys.

That should be your morning show. You're riding with Rick and bitch. We're trying to figure out what boobs are. It's me the bitch. I think I have a pretty good idea. I talked to my mom last night. I talked to your mom too. Rick dog.

I say Rick dog to punctuate things. Lenders bagels. Then I graduated to Duncan. Well, I mean like Dunkin Donuts right around there. Then I did. Look, this is the thing. Like New York bagels are just the better. I mean, they just have so many great bagels.

Yeah, right in New York City. But like second to that, if you're not on the East Coast, like me, I feel like a bagel shop, like a shop that's just for bagels, was putting out good big pretty good bagels, which is kind of a trend here in LA right now. There's there's some really good bagels here. Yeah.

What are some of your ones? What are some of your favorites? My favorite is Mori's. Mori's, okay. That's like deaf. That's the closest to like a New York bagel. It used to be Sam's on Largemont. That's my second.

And then I also like Bagel Broker on Beverly. Oh yeah. I know Bagel Broker. I'd say those are my top three. Bagel Broker is the is the funniest name. Yeah, it's a good name. I'm with you. I'm an everything.

I try to get an everything bagel. Yeah. Or you know what? I will do the sesame is fun. I like the little sesame seeds. Sesame is a delight. Has a fun flavor. I do an everything bagel.

But I think honestly, my favorite is a salt bagel. Oh, wow. I love something. Salt. I'm a salty dog. I love to get it. So I love to get my salt. Wow.

Yeah. Do you put on that cream cheese? I will put just some plain cream cheese usually on a salt bagel to cut the saltiness a little bit. But for me, it's like the same thing as a soft pretzel. And I'll eat the saltier side first. And then the less salty side is like a chaser. And I love it.

I love a salt bagel. I love a I love everything bagel. And you know what? And this might be something that you don't consider a bagel. But this is one that they have at Noah's. The one that's got jalapeno cheese on it. The jalapeno cheese bagel. Oh, yeah.

I really like that. I really like that. It can't really. Okay. My argument. Hold on a second. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay, guys. Wait. My argument is that the only legit flavor of bagels is onion, sesame, pop, or sorry, everything. Poppy, sesame, plain. That's pretty restrictive. No onion?

No. What? Why? Wait. Okay. Yes. Yes. What about an egg bagel?

Okay. Yeah. Oh yeah. Egg bagel. A pumpernickel. So some like traditional bagels is what you're saying. Yeah. Not these fancy ones.

Not these new fangled bagels. Not like strawberry bagel. Get the fuck out of here. Not these new bageled bagels. You're saying strawberry bagels. Nice job. Strawberry, get out of here. Blueberry, you're out.

Cinnamon raisin. Take a hike. Nope. Cinnamon raisin though is an old school. It's a legacy bagel. No way. It's good. I've had some nice asiagos.

I like it, but not a bagel. Yeah. A legacy. You think it's a legacy bagel? Yeah. I feel like it's a legacy bagel. We haven't talked enough about bagels. We could talk about bagels for hours.

I know. You guys never did a bagel place. We haven't done a bagel place. We haven't done a bagel place. My god. Well, let's talk about this bagel place. Noah's. I will say that Noah's is a place I've had a lot and it's primarily because

of work. It feels like it's a very common bulk order place. Like you'll get to work. Yes. And someone will be like, hey, I brought bagels and it's from Noah's. And you get the Noah's smear. And is it smear or smear? Smear.

You get the Noah's smear. Hold on. We got to talk about smear for a second. Yeah. Smear. Smear is gross on. It's a gross word. You're on a smear campaign for smear.

Why are you smearing smear all over the streets? Smear is smearing itself. Well, enough. Despite its very existence. It's a gross word. Smear. Yeah. I think the highest ratio of disgusting word to delicious food.

There is. There will be another disgusting word, delicious food. Cumquat. Yeah. Is cumquat. Do cumquats taste that good though? I don't know if I'd say cumquats are. Emma says yes.

Yeah, they're sweet. Oh, they're sweet. Okay. But delicious. I mean, I guess they could be. It depends on personal taste thing. Cumquat is a weird word. Hot dog.

Hot dog. It's kind of gross. I don't find it that gross. Yeah. I don't find it. Just, you know, trying something. Oh, no. I'm not noting you.

Just saying. Like I don't find that hot hot dog that gross. Maybe corn dog is grosser. No. No. Okay. Hot dog. I don't know.

Oh. Shit. Pupic. Have you ever heard the term pupic? What's a pupic? It's like that. It's the little, in like a chicken, you know, you get a raw chicken. Oh, yeah.

It's like the, sort of like the dick or it's like the neck or something. It's like that little like dick like thing that you have to pull out of the inside. Nick is very, very interested. More than he has been in the entire answer. And like old Jews will chop it up and fry it up and eat it. Wow. But is it good? I don't think so.

Those scores going to be talking about all the fucking chicken dicks tonight. It's hard to figure, to just come up with a word. Yeah. That's a word that's weird. It's like, I don't know. I don't know how to think that way. We know a lot of words collectively, but it's hard to do. It's a difficult exercise.

Slop, yeah. I think you're losing your mind right now. It's difficult. This is insane. Look, Shmere sounds gross. Shmere sounds gross. Tastes good. Yeah.

There's a lot of things like that. Oh, Snapple doesn't even sound that good, but it tastes delicious. I think it sounds kind of fresh and bright. Yeah, it does. Shit. Is that true, or is that the fucking corporate side of you? I shill for them. They own me.

I think I got one. How about pork butt? Yeah, it's gross. Pork butt is good. It's kind of funny, though. It is kind of funny. It is funny. Yeah, I don't know.

That's gross. Pork butt. It's funny that we're only thinking of meat-based foods because meat sort of is gross. Yeah, it is inherently gross. Dog shit? Well, dog shit is just dog shit. Dog shit is just dog shit, and you don't really eat it. It's delicious.

I mean, I haven't eaten it, but I bet it's not delicious. Pickled herring? Oh, pickled herring. I like pickled herring. Do you really? Yeah. That's also kind of a Jew food, though. If you don't grow up on it, I think maybe you don't like it.

Is that the one that's got some, like, cream? Yeah. It's suspended in cream? Oh, well, that's creamed herring. That's creamed herring, okay. A pickled herring is just, like, herring that's literally pickled and sort of in, like, brine. And then the creamed herring is, like, you add, I don't even really know what that cream is. Is it mayonnaise?

Is it cream? I don't know. I feel like I'd be into that. So, Noah's Bagels, yeah. I have that at work a lot. It's a bulk order place. That's most of my experience. I went to the Venice Crossroads location.

Each of the locations has different signage to say where exactly it is. And I will say the server was super friendly, called me Honey, which I appreciated. I love a Honey from a server. That's nice. I asked her, like, how's it going? She was, like, for a hump day, not so bad. I was, like, oh, this is great. Having some ice.

Was it Mariah Carey? It was not Mariah Carey unless she looks a lot different. She could have been doing, like, another cover boss thing. Also, I don't even know. All I know is that she, did she have a song called Honey? Oh, God. Yeah. Just fucking delete the last two minutes.

Might as well delete the whole episode. No! Jenny's been funny. Delete everything except for Jenny. What Jenny's saying? Yeah, it'd just be me. This is just Jenny's chat. The dough girl.

So I got the treat. They have bagels, but they also have a breakfast menu where you can get stuff that's a little bit more of a composed dish. I got the chorizo avocado sunrise egg sandwich, which was on a cheddar jalapeno gourmet bagel, one of those ones I talked about. Can I say that kind of sounds gross as hell? Yeah, it sounds really gross. It's got a lot of elements.

A jalapeno salsa smear. There's that word again, and pepper jack cheese. So they're really loading up all these spicy elements. And I am something of a heat seeker, but I'll say this one is not particularly spicy. The jalapeno salsa smear was nice, but also just kind of gooey. Not a lot of avocado. It was just kind of like a little layer, a very thin layer of guac basically. But the egg was good quality, and the chorizo was a patty, which was unusual in my experience,

but it was not bad. The bagel itself was the best part, just like a nice toasted bagel, toasted hot bagel. But I would just get a bagel with a smear over this in the future. I also got an iced sugar cookie, which had rainbow sprinkles on it. This was a hard ass cookie. It was way too fucking hard. Oh, no, that's not good. It was disconcertingly hard and not fun to eat.

And so, yeah, I'm putting that... It's an anti-mitch in terms of hardness. Jesus Christ. I don't even get it. Good, don't listen to all that. I'm saying mitches perpetually flaccid. Good, thanks for explaining it. That's not a problem for most people.

Well, you can walk around with a heart on all day. With a bagel around your dick. Bagel around your hard dick. Take it out of your pants, entertain an old man. And I got the vanilla hazelnut latte as well, which is hot. Normally, we'll just get a straight up coffee from Noah's. Got a little bit more of a fancy drink. I will say this one, my sugar cookie sucked,

but the vanilla hazelnut latte was kind of nice. It was a little too sweet for me, but not overly sweet. I just don't like a sweet coffee as a thing. But, you know, I had nice vanilla hazelnut flavor. I was on board with the whole thing. The service was great, and the store was very clean and well-maintained for something that was very busy early in the morning.

What was your... You guys went together to know us. We did. And also, it's funny, we got in there. Jenny jumped in my car. I was a couple minutes late. I hopped in. I didn't hop in.

It was fun. I thought that was fun. I ordered myself for being a couple minutes late. That's okay. I just got back. Look, it was all fun. We had a good time. We had a great time.

We had a great time. You showed me where the parking was. We walked over there. We ordered a few things. I'm not going to say what they are yet, but the funny thing that we realized is that we ordered like four things that were just the first things you see when you come in.

And we're all next to each other. Like the four pictures that were on the thing. The first pictures you see are the four things you ordered. We were like, yeah, that. Oh, and that. Oh, and how about that? We got four things, which also we got. This is another moment.

We got shamed in there. I brought over the four. I didn't tell you this. I brought over the four things and the guy sitting behind us, he saw me bring over like the last two and he went and kind of like, he did kind of like opened up his eyes pretty wide. And I want to be like, we're reviewing it for a podcast show. But then, you know, like a cartoon, then I look and say,

yeah, his eyes opened up like really wide. Like, well, you're getting a lot of food because we got four. Oh, that sucks. I know you should be like, you're sitting alone. You loser. I was out of a movie by myself the night before. I couldn't do that. I know.

I don't disparage being alone and eating. I do it too. Oh, that's great. We got four lunch menu items. Yeah, we got a lot. I mean, one and maybe we got the wrong things. Maybe we got the wrong things. One, one maybe isn't a lunch menu item.

Well, everyone, you'll be the judge of this wagon. We got the hot pastrami sandwich, which is served hot Swiss, diced, diced pickles, which I don't think we're on there, red onion, mustard on an everything bagel. The Swiss was missing and the I don't think there was diced pickles on there. No, and the pastrami was not hot. And the pastrami was not.

So there's three things are off the map. Turkey Avocado Club, thick cut bacon, lettuce, tomato, roasted tomato, roasted tomato spread on a potato roll. This bad boy. This was better than the pastrami sandwich, which it was surprised by. But the potato roll was gross. We should have gotten a bagel.

Yeah, we should have gotten it on a bagel instead. 100%. And the the bacon was not thick cut, but I was okay with that because I like a thin, crispy bacon. I agree. The thick cut bacon is disconcerting sometimes. It's a little too much to chew through. Yeah, also wasn't there.

I thought there was like a guac on this because it says roasted tomato spread, but there was like a guac on this because you hated the guac. Remember? Yeah, it was like a can. Well, it was like an avocado club. Yeah. So it wasn't really avocado.

It was just kind of like a canned guacamole situation. Yeah. Yeah. And yeah, this one was okay. We also got a bagel dog. Asiago cheese bagel dog. I was tempted by the bagel dog, but it was too early in the morning for them.

They split it. I love a bagel. But they split it right down the middle. Oh, that's weird. Like lengthwise. Oh, wow. Which I was thinking about this later. And I wondered if that was because so you could feel like

you're eating like a hot dog, like the way a bun is and a hot dog. Yeah. Because it wasn't cut all the way through. It was sliced half. Oh, got it. So you could like, maybe we were supposed to put the ketchup and custard.

Oh, no. I thought you were about to make millions. Oh, my God. It's like goober or that peanut butter jelly thing. Oh, yeah. Maybe you were supposed to... Except no one buys it. They put it together and eat it like a bun?

Yes. I don't know. I've seen that presentation before, but not with... I like it's not with a fucking bagel dog. I've just seen it like the dog slice down the middle. Yeah, it was weird. It was harder to eat. Yeah.

Mustard and ketchup mixed together in a jar is like this most disgusting thing I can picture. I would like it, I think. Put some ranch in there. I'm good. Have you had the crunch? No. It's a craft ketchup and ranch blend.

Oh, my God. I would be into that. You might want to pursue it. We had it here. There still might be some of my friends. Do you like it? I didn't love it. I think there was...

It was better than I expected, though. But to me, I was just like, if I wanted to have both these sauces, I'd rather add them in the proportions that I... That you like it. Yeah, exactly. It tastes a little weird all mushed together. It wasn't quite... Yeah, it wasn't quite how I'd want to do it.

We did ketchup and mustard on those. We had some packets of that. And also, I put some mustard on that pastrami sandwich as well. And then the last thing... Yeah, it needed it. It did need it. There was a little bit on there, but not enough. Yeah.

The last thing I got, the last thing we got, outside of... We got two waters. Yeah. And then we... I also got a gigantic orange juice, which was like a fresh squeezed orange juice. It was very big. It was very big, but it was good.

I felt like I was getting sick. It was a good orange juice. Yeah. That was tasty. The thing... The last thing we got, which is a winner for me, was the Nova Lock sandwich. Yeah.

So, red onion capers. I don't like capers. With plain schmere on a plain bagel, but we got it on an everything bagel. Yeah. We got all everything. It was definitely the best of the bunch, but now that you... You said your thing was lightly toasted.

I think that our bagels were not toasted. Oh, interesting. Now that I'm thinking about it. Do you think a bagel has to be toasted? I think if it's fresh, no. Yes. I like a soft, fresh bagel with cream cheese on it. If it's a little warm, yeah.

If it's a little like later in the day or a day old, you got to toast that. I like it toasted. I used to be a toast guy all the way through, but then sometimes a bagel can be not toasted. Yeah, I think you're right. I do like an onion or everything bagel toasted because I just like the little onions to get crispy.

Yeah. That's good, but... That's fun. Sometimes that inside is so moist and nice and you don't want to... Yeah. You don't want to fuck that up. Yeah, you don't want to ruin it. You could do a light toast.

Sometimes I'm known to do like a very light toast. Oh, boy, interesting. And that's nice. It's like a little crisp on top, but not soft the whole rest of the way. That's good. I like that quite a bit. Light toast also nice if someone has a minor life achievement.

A light toast. You know what, man? I'm going to just tell you. Like meeting Adam Sandler? Yeah. A light toast to you, Mitch. Can I just tell you something? Yeah.

That straight up sucks. What about a light roast? Good in a coffee. I do like a light roasted coffee. You portly fool. Is that a light roast? Yeah. Would you like me to get you a razor?

That's kind of a light roast. Yeah. Well, yeah, it was kind of a light roast. I was light roasting. Yeah. Fuck that guy, though. You got roasted and toasted last night. The bagel, the Nova Locks bagel was my favorite of the bunch.

It was definitely the best of the bunch. I will say, well, maybe not the hot dog because inherently that's just very flavorful, but all the sandwiches, I felt like all of them were like almost tasteless. That's about it. Like the locks. I was surprised at that it wasn't like worse. Yeah.

Well, also the too much lettuce. The lettuce was not. The lettuce was overwhelming. There was lettuce and tomato and pastrami sandwich. Big no no. I think I just prepared it wrong, to be honest. You don't put lettuce and tomato. You know what?

That's let me check here. I kind of think they just did it wrong. Oh, it's possible. Oh, I think they did do it wrong. I think they just gave us a deli sandwich. It is wrong. There's the hot pastrami does not have. It does not list.

Yeah. You know, I think part of the issue is I think people go to Noah's for bagels and coffee and those menu items are there to kind of like have some higher margin, higher, you know, like fuller meals. Right. I think they're not commonly ordered. You're not supposed to really get them. Well, we realized that after we were like, we should have just

gotten bagel and cream cheese, like regular. Definitely worse. That was the thing when we were walking away was just like, yeah, I want a bagel and cream cheese and the bagel because the lot of the nova lock sandwich, I just took stuff off and I was like, this is a good bagel and cheese. If I had an everything bagel and cream cheese, I would have enjoyed it.

I would have been 100%. It was fine, but I feel, I mean, maybe I'm just like, I used to eat Noah's bagels constantly growing up and I feel like the quality has gone down. Like the bagel itself was not great. It was bread, which I'm fine with. Like I like bread, but it just kind of felt like too soft. Like, you know, bagels got to have a little crispy on the outside.

It has to be just like textured. Yes. And it just, I was not, I just didn't really like, I don't know. That's fair. That's fair. Well, we should get to our final thoughts on Noah's bagels. So Jenny, we are going to go around. We are going to give a summation of our feelings on this chain

based on a lifetime of consumption and then end by giving it a fork rating from zero to five forks. You are a guest. Oh. We'll begin with you. Oh, just like final thoughts. Yeah. Any final thoughts and then give it a fork rating.

Well, overall, I felt that everything just kind of tasted like nothing. Even after eating all that, I was still really hungry. Like two, couple hours later, had a little bit of a headache from the cream cheese. The bagel was okay. The locks was better quality than it. Sometimes you get like really shitty locks at these places

or like fatty or something. And it was pretty like good, pretty melty. But I guess my fork rating, I'm going to give it two and a half. Wow, boy. Wow. Two and a half. Teddy, that's low as hell. It just wasn't that good.

Well, it's right. The sandwiches were bad. The bagel dog was good, but I mean, you get that at Costco. That's true. That's true. I mean, like they shouldn't. I feel bad for this place because I feel like they're trying to, you know, they're trying to keep up with a market like a lunch

and like they're trying to keep up with subways and all these other places that they shouldn't be keeping up with. And the low carb craze has really hurt the bagel sector. Of course. And the donut sector. Yeah. And that persists. Yeah.

They have like bagel fins there, I think. Yeah. Or something like that. Where it's like, okay. That's a bummer. Bagel fins just bummed me out. I don't know. I just wasn't impressed.

Okay. I get it. I get it. But also I'm a snob about it. I'm a snob about it. It's fine to be a snob about something you feel passionately about. I almost want to give it an incomplete. Wow.

Yeah. I mean, when I saw the lettuce and tomato on that pastrami sandwich, I was surprised as Joe Green was when I pulled that bagel out of my pants. You did pull it out of your pants when we were sitting at lunch. That would be fair. It's still my thing. I got to give this three forks. There's not a lot I can say on it.

I just I'm just throwing the score out there because like look, I love bagels. They're very important to me. I'm with you. I'm not. I don't give a bagel snob, but a bad bagel is such a bummer because a bad bagel sucks. Yeah. A bad bagel is a bummer because you're eating this carb.

You're eating the carbs. Why? Yes. You're eating the cream cheese. Yeah. And then you're like, what the fuck was the point of all that? I just ate all that shit. And this was kind of like a shitty crummy bagel.

There's far too many bad bagels in the world. Yeah. I don't. It's definitely one of those foods. You're like, if you're going to eat it, it better be good. It better be good. I don't think Noah's is bad. I think that Noah's actually.

I think the bagels are actually pretty good there. Yes. I almost want to go three and a half because I, Oh, I feel like the bagels are decent, but the, I feel like the sandwich kind of, the sandwich is kind of brought it. They just brought it down. Yeah.

We never had just a bagel to try. That's true. We should have done that. That's why it's almost an, it's almost an incomplete. I'm going to say three, I'm going to say three, three forks. Three forks. Yeah. Three forks from the Spoon Man Michael.

But, but, but I also don't think that, I think that those, you know, they got the brown box that you bring to the office or whatever. They're kind of, it's kind of a tall box. It's kind of fun. Yes. You got the bagels in there. I do like that. If they're fresh and good and you got that smear gross word,

but if you got the smear, smear it, it's, you don't have to say it. If you, uh, things are, things are going to work. Things are going, you're having a nice breakfast. You're having a good morning. I don't know. I just, I feel like we did a disservice by getting all these weird sandwiches. So I feel bad in some way. We fucked up.

No, I don't think you fucked up. I think it was fine. I think it's reasonable. It's okay to try more of their menu because that's what they're offering. And that's how we evaluate the chain. Yeah. Also like a bagel lock sandwich is not crazy. No.

That's like normal. They should be able to nail that. Yeah. Yeah. And that was the best thing. And it was surprisingly better than we thought. Um, for my closing thoughts, I would like to do a reading from the Burger King James Bible. They came to Noah to enter the toaster two by two of every bagel with the flavor of life.

Is that it? What? That's all I had. I was looking for a Bible, a Bible quote that would maybe work for this, but I couldn't find anything. Was that a real Bible quote? Yeah. I just changed some words.

I've never in my life hoped for more and wanted less. You read the whole Bible for this podcast. I speed read, I speed read the King James Bible on the bus to work. You got a hotel room. I found it in the drawer. Uh, not worth it. Let me say this. I, I think this place keep, keep it simple.

Get regular coffee. Kiss. Keep it simple stupid. Kiss. Keep it simple stupid. Do you remember how many like old men have, like, do you remember? Like old men have told me that like a hundred times. And I said, kiss me.

When it's grandpa, that's good. When it's not grandpa, that's bad. I apologize. That was, that was, that was not a good joke. No, I liked it. What do you mean? For all for you. I liked it.

I feel guilty. For us, it would have been one of our best jokes ever. Yeah. Yeah, we can never come up with that. Celtic's leading, going into half wager. Stop watching the basketball game. I'm not watching it. You are.

Well, yeah, it's in my peripheral vision. You could turn it off. We'll watch it. We'll watch it for the Q and which is not listening because he was looking at the TV and then I said something and he turned back into the microphone. Like as if he was laughing. But I could tell he was not. That's not true.

I haven't. I'm facing the opposite way of the TV. Why is the one watching the Celtics game? Here's what I'm going to say. Keep it simple stupid. Uh huh. If you go to Noah's bagels, get a regular bagel or get one of your bagel of choice. Get some sort of smear.

Get some sort of straight up coffee or whatever your beverage is. Get a second smear. Get a second smear. They had weird smears like cranberry, walnut, pesto or something. They had very strange flavors. They got some fucked up smears. I keep it straight ahead there in terms of my smears. I might go a more exotic bagel, but I'll just go plain.

Kiss. Keep it simple, smear. Keep it smear, smear. Kiss me, smear. I'm going to split the, I'm going to be in the ballpark buds with the two of you. I think this is a three fork chain. Yeah. I think it does bagels fine and coffee fine and then the other stuff just don't even bother.

Wow. We're hand holding in this one wise. Yeah, we're hand holding. You guys will have to do Einstein and see because if it's owned by the same, it must be the same shit, right? Yeah. What's the point? It should be. It's interesting that they have Noah, a figure from the Bible and Einstein, a figure from science.

Oh yeah. That is interesting. God versus science. Yeah. Classic. That's the internal struggle of this corporation. You can only believe in one or the other. You really can.

You're right. I wonder if Einstein will be better than Noah's. I feel like I like Noah's better, but who knows? Maybe I'm wrong. They make you think. You need to email them immediately. Have you guys ever thought of this? How does it make you think?

Sorry. That was delightful. Don't apologize for being the one entertaining person on this podcast. It's time for a segment. Mitch, introduce this bad boy for us. All right. 525,600 guzzles. 525,600 chugs.

525,600 guzzles. How many buds does it take to get drunk? Talk about. Bud. And drink it some. Buds. And talk about. We're talking about buds.

We're drinking some buds. Seasonal. Buds. Seasonal. Buds. That's it. That's nice. That was very good.

That's really beautiful. Thank you. I like that. I love musical theater, so I appreciated that. Oh, that's cool. That was from some musical theater show. Rent? Rent.

Oh, boy. But you knew the whole thing. How do you not know the name of the place? We're going to try alcohol. We are going to try some alcohol. Oh, my God. That's so exciting. I'm not a drunk.

But I was going to ask you guys if you ever did like, you know, alcoholic drink. We certainly have. And we're about to do some more. So here's the deal. Yes. The song was Seasonal Buds. I actually had wrote that song as Seasons of Crud.

I was in a group called Crud. Yes. And Crud too. It was first an improv group and then a sketch group. And then a sketch group. Yeah. And then we just never did it. You know, this is just never going to happen.

So I turned it to Seasonal Buds. Here's the issue. Yeah. There are no real Seasonal Buds. Yeah, it's kind of an adventure to be yours. Yeah, this whole thing is stupid. But we got a few different buds. I think you could classify as Seasonal.

I think it's fair. They don't have like Christmas time. That's what I was really hoping for. And they should. It's crazy that they don't. I'm surprised. That like Sam Adams has them or whatever and they don't. But we got some Seasonal Buds.

They got those Clydesdales. That's Seasonal. Yeah, that's, I mean, but there's no Clydesdale flavor, for God's sake. Maybe there should be. We got ourselves some Bud Light Orange. Okay. We got ourselves.

Thank you, Jenny. Bud Light Lemon Tea. Cool. So this is the summer season. That's fun. And then one last one here. It is the Budweiser Copper Lager Jim Bean. These are all twist offs.

Whoa, cool. Why does it have Jim Bean in it? I don't, I think they're, I think it's aged in Jim Bean. Oh, it's aged in the bottles. Oh, it's aged in the bottles. Those Toy Story paper towels. I'm going to pop this off with the bottle opener I have attached to my key chain again.

They're twist off wagers. You need a lemon tea? Do you want to use this paper towel? No, you can just, we can all drink straight from the bottle, right? Yeah. Yeah, I don't care. I don't care. I was just opening it.

Wiger, you need a lemon, you need a lemon tea pot. Wiger needs a lemon tea. Yeah, send me a lemon tea. What are you, so Jenny, you drink, you drink alcohol. Thank you, Emma. Wiger definitely drinks alcohol. Wiger, do you need a copper lager Jim Bean one or not? Yeah, give me a copper lager.

All right, now I think everyone, you need orange. Wiger, did you drive? Orange. No, I did not drive. Smart. Oh, Jenny. Oh, thank you. Yeah, because we do have to finish all three of these.

So you are, you are. No, I'm always, you can help us out. Oh yes, I'm gonna see which one is the best. Maybe I'll drink one. Jenny, what are your alcohol faves? What do you, what do you go for? I mean, I like, like a, like a cocktail, like a fancy cocktail that I don't know what any of the ingredients are.

Oh sure. You know, that I could never make on my own. Right. Like a big bar where I'll come, you know, like, like, like, what are they, what are those people called that make fancy cocktails? Oh yeah, like the mixologist. Mixologist. Mixologist.

Yeah. Yeah, like kind of a fancy thing with weird liqueurs in it and stuff that tastes delicious. Those, those craft cocktails that have like, they, they tend to have like punny names. Yeah, I'm into all of it. Like call your cardamom or something like that. Yeah. That's pretty good. Yeah.

We got three, we got, these are as far as the Bud wiser world goes. These are kind of like mixologist versions of some Bud beer. It's true. We've got the copper locker, like I said, the orange and the lemon tea. I'm going to, which one do you want to start with, Nick? I say, let's start with orange. Sure. And then you were, you were really about the orange.

You really want to try the orange. I haven't encountered orange before. I mean, I know I've, I've had like the, you know, like the blue moon, like those kinds of beers. That's, that's my first when I, when I was getting into beer, not that blue moon is like a crazy beer to have. But when I was drinking heavily in my twenties and blue moon and having it with like a little slice of orange was very nice or a whole garden with this piece of orange or something

in it. Yeah. That's good. And so this is, this is, this is taking out the middle man. There's no actual fruit in this. You missed it. They were just showing an ad for Bud wiser reserve copper logger. Wow.

With Charlize Theron. Wow. I want to, she's, she's on my list of people I want to meet. Oh boy. Yeah. Me. Oh. In quotes.

What the hell? MEAT. What does that mean? I want to eat her. Ew. So this, this, it says it's made with real orange peel or something like that. I'd set it on the side of the box. Two.

Yeah. I'm sorry. Oh, I like it. I don't like Bud light. Like, um, and this, it tastes delightful to me. It doesn't have that same flavor as like a Bud light. My issue with this is very, it's very orangey. It's like a smooth, a very smooth, less sweet orange soda.

And I could like chug this whole thing. It's like way too drinkable for me. Oh. Oh, that's why you don't like it. Yeah. That's, that's my problem. Because it's too, you want something that doesn't taste drinkable. I like that.

I like a beer that's maybe got a little bit more. I like a smooth beer. I like like a logger. I like like a Pilsner. I like a lighter beer. I don't like an IPA that has a bunch of hops to it. I mean, I've had some good ones, but it's not my preferred style. But I don't like one that's so flavored that I feel like I'm just drinking candy.

Yeah. If it's too, this isn't too sweet, which I appreciate because I don't like those ciders that are super sweet. Yeah. Like here's, I like, I love ciders and I drink them up at the end of the night. Like your legs feel numb. Yeah. Have you ever tried tin city cider?

I have not. No. It's not good. Not sweet at all. I gotta try it. It's my favorite. This, this is, here's, here's the funny thing about this is that it doesn't feel like as heavy as a beer would.

No, it doesn't at all, which is weird. And also like I'm like, but it probably still is just as heavy as a beer is like this is a trick that it tastes kind of even lighter than, than, than a, than even above light. Right. Like it tastes like very light. It does. It tastes like a soda. And it does kind of like a soda.

It's the alcohol content. I don't see it on here. Maybe it's on the box. I think that. Oh, 4.2. Oh, 4.2. I do. I do.

That's low. It's a normal beer. I feel like most are like five to six. Oh. Yeah. I would appreciate, I appreciate this in that it feels lighter, but then also it's very sweet. I think I would maybe rather just get like the whole garden or blue moon or whatever with

a piece of orange in it instead. Right. I concur. All right. Let's move on to this Bud Light lemon tea. Lemon tea. I'm suspicious of this. Hey, similar to that Snapple you were having.

That happened half. I just took, I just took a sip of this and it, and it's, I mean, I'm sorry. I just took a sniff of this and it smells very much like tea. I hate this. I hate it too. It's so gross. This is awful. I have to try it again.

Yeah. This is vile. This is so far. This is so gross. I don't like this. I don't like this. I'd rather have like a spiked tea, you know, like vodka tea or something. This even having a beer element is very.

It's nasty. It doesn't work. Yeah. Beer mixed with tea. There's something about this that tastes like, it's just like a taste from like my 20s of like an old beer or like being like throwing up and then tasting beer or something. Yeah. There's something like throw up.

There's something bizarre. We're like after a party and in the morning your living room smells like this. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I see the issue. It says Bud Light Lemon Tea Lager Brood with real puke. Oh my God. Oh, that's why.

That's the issue. It does taste really nasty. But this is disgusting. I have to wash it down with the orange. Yeah. The orange is way better. A twisted tea. Well, a twisted tea is, I like a twisted tea every so often.

A twisted tea. Have you had a twisted tea? Like, is that like a... They're like the alcohol, they're like the tea, like they're like little tea drinks with alcohol, like they're bottle. I like that. I'm into that. Yeah.

It's like tea from the mines of the UCB Theater. What? The Twisted Mines. The Twisted Mines. The Twisted Mines. The Twisted Mines. The Twisted Mines that operate there, the famous Twisted Mines. Oh, at the UCB Theater.

It sounds like you're saying mines. M-I-N-E-S. Yeah, that's what I thought you said. That's the issue. There's mines underneath that place? Wouldn't surprise me. It's a ballrog. It's about to cave in at any moment.

It's a ballrog underneath there. All right, let's finish up with this Budweiser Copper Lager. I'll drink your milk, Shane. How did you just do that voice? He sounded like a cartoon elf. It's me, Messer. Oh, that's what you were trying to do anyway. And then we got Budweiser Copper Lager Jim Beam.

You keep saying Jim Beam. I know. I'm just like a different guy. I'm in the mood for beans. Let's try this thing out. Let's see how this is. This is a Bud Heavy Wags. Jim Beam is like the Johnny Applesauce of beans.

They're leaving beans everywhere? Yeah, they're spreading beans across the country. Everyone hates him. Wait, do you say the Johnny Applesauce? Johnny Appleseed. Oh, OK. Johnny Applesauce. I mean, that's more my speed.

That's more your seed. I met a guy at a gas station once, and he appeared to be an unhoused gentleman, and I gave him some money and talked to him for a little bit, and he said that he was... That whole sentence was so strange. You have to say that again? A house gentleman? Unhoused. I've met a gentleman at a gas station before.

Is that what you're supposed to say? I mean, you could say homeless. I think people are saying unhoused more now because it's a little less pejorative. Oh, OK. I didn't really know that. Yeah, I think it's like a recent thing, and maybe I'm being too precious with my language here, but he said that he's like, you know who I am? I'm Johnny Applesauce.

He's like, I spread life across the country. Oh, that's nice. And then he came on here. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I'm going to shot a thick rope ball. Through a bagel hole. It was amazing.

It was midair. It was impressed. I gave him $5. He gave him $20 after that. Thanks, buddy. So this copper lager is... I mentioned IPAs earlier. It is a little harsher.

Honestly, it feels like a black lager or like a... What are those? Again, as I know, it's an ale, but there are some dark lagers. A stout? Yeah, like a stout. It seems like a stout. This is good. There are some dark lagers.

Is it coffee? Do you generally like stouts? You like darker beers? I'm OK with them sometimes, but it's different than I expected when you see lager on the bottle. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it.

I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. It's different than I expected when you see lager on the bottle. I don't like it. But I also am not a huge fan of stouts, but I do like Guinness sometimes. I don't think it's bad.

I don't think it's like great. Yeah. I think it is just like for what this is... It's just like have a Guinness. Yes, I agree with you. Like you don't know. A Guinness is much better than this. Yeah.

Yeah, I concur. It's just that funny thing of like... Maybe that goes for all these things. I mean, I think I would rather have a Guinness than all these for sure. It's just this funny thing to me that they try to have... Look, I was raised on Bud Light in Quincy, Massachusetts. I love Bud Light. I have issues with beer now, but I still drink Bud Light to this day.

There's no shame in an American macro brew. Some of those are... It's like Coke or Pepsi. It's like, if it's what you like, it's what you like. Here's my issue with it. This is like if Coca-Cola made Sprite, but then like their base of Sprite was still Coca-Cola. Like you taste...

Yeah. That's a great point. It tastes like... It still just tastes like... It tastes like Bud's still. That like sugary, yeah. And it's like... If you're going to switch this up of like...

I'm trying to beat red. From the... Are you... Is that a thing to film when you drink? Sometimes. Sometimes I'm a little allergic, I think. There's a... Yeah, there's like a compound that some people...

Some people have reactions to. Some people have reactions to. Exes over your eyes. Oh, she's dead. This is a sort of thing of like... Make your twisted tea or whatever. Right. Or make...

Or like it just... I don't know. It feels unnecessary. It just feels unnecessary. There's too much of the base of what you're still trying to do. That like mixes weirdly. Look, we'll write these. It's very clear to me how these rank.

Yeah. It's so... This is so straightforward. It's obvious. I wouldn't mind mixing it into my night. That's number one. Orange is... Orange is a dream compared to the rest of these.

And then, yes. Then the Budweiser, Jim Beam, second. Yeah. Last place is definitely that lemon tea. Such a disappointment. I thought that would be a fond one. Lemon tea. Yeah.

I mean, I'm still gonna finish it. But it sucks. Of course you are. Well, hey. Do you... What's your ranking, Jenny? Same. Same, yeah.

We're in consensus. We're in the Handling Club here. All right. Well, I guess that does it for this segment. I guess we'll all take us out. I guess that's it. That's it. You know, if...

You know what's gonna be now? Yeah. Seasons of Bud-Mud. The grossest, like, collage... It's like the collogy term of, like, kids would say, when you're like, you got... I got, like, Bud-Mud, which means, like, they were, like,

shitting. They were, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

like, like, they were, like, shitting. They were, like, on the toilet, shitting. Maybe this is just, like, between... Like, Mud-Butt. I never heard that. Yes.

Like, Mud-Butt, but from Bud-Wise. Like, from A Night of Drinking, you get those really unpleasant bowel movements. Oh. You've heard that before, right? I've never heard Bud-Mud before. Oh, this is like, maybe a disgusting guy term.

No, I've never heard that either. I've heard, like, Hangover Black referencing, like, a disgusting shit. That's even... That's even stranger. Hangover Black, I've never heard this. Hangover Black.

Vodka shits. Vodka shits? Yeah. That's terrible, too. Bud-Mud is maybe the nicer one. Bud-Mud is the nicest way to say it. Yeah, all these terms for shit are disgusting. Just like a restaurant,

we've got your feedback. Let's open up the feedback. We have a voicemail today. Let's go ahead and listen to this bad boy. Here we go. Hey, deaf boys. This is Zach from California. I was just calling because I just heard

the segment on Chipotle's Duparne Asada, which I have tried at a few restaurants. And I've found that while I agree that some are dry, they are not all dry. It's date being cooked on a griddle. So I think this, more than any of Chipotle's other items, are very... It's very reliant on what your cook is doing

and who is cooking. So I've had it at some places, and it was amazing, and other places, and it's done. So I just wanted to report my findings at multiple restaurants for Chipotle's Duparne Asada. Thank you. Love you guys.

Bye. I just want to... I think I said I love you guys, but then... It was a little too much. It was a little too Stan. Eminem's Stan for me. You think Zach is our Stan? Zach is our Stan.

He was calling from the road. If you listen to a few more voicemails, I'll be like, Hey, Dope Boys, you still haven't answered my call or whatever that song says. I thought we could be together. What does that mean, Zach? I will say that that...

I got Ronald McDonald in the trunk. I will say what Zach describes in reference to Chipotle, that it is contingent on the individual cook is a problem in terms of scale. Because the hiring practices of these chains, it's like they're very low wage generally, and they hire people who are maybe not professional.

It's not like you're hiring line cooks in there or chefs. These dishes are meant to be prepared by somebody who maybe doesn't have a lot of experience in the kitchen. If you make something that's reliant on that person's individual skill, it's just going to create consistency problems. That's a death knell for a chain.

Things have to be consistent chain-wide. That's my gut reaction to that. But maybe we can broaden this. First off, Jenny, are you a Chipotle fan at all? No. Have you ever been? Yeah, we did that for a double, I think. That's right.

We were here for our Mouth of the Border tournament. Those were the episodes we did. Yeah. So you did review Chipotle. Yes. Right? I think so. I think so.

I think you maybe knocked Chipotle out. I actually could be wrong about that. I don't know. No, because I think you might have been. I think you were in that round. That probably would have been it. Yeah, but I have had Chipotle. You are quite red.

I'm turning into a Snapple Apple. It happens sometimes. Right. Usually with low quality alcohol. Oh, boy. No. That's no boys, baby. Not a Chipotle fan, but have you, I know you don't eat a ton

at chain restaurants, but are there places where you've noticed consistency issues? Are there chains you feel like that are more consistent than others? Gosh, I don't go enough to chain restaurants, I feel like to know. I feel like anytime I do go to one, I'm always disappointed. Yeah. Or like it's not as good as I remember being, or I don't go enough to know. That might have been the last one I went to Chipotle, and I was disappointed. Wow.

I went to Chicken Burrito from Chipotle just recently, and it was a bad quality night at Chipotle. They're having consistency issues. Yeah. It's a bummer. It's a bummer because Chipotle used to be a lot better. Have you noticed, because I think this is an issue with Burger King, and we've talked about Burger King at length in recent years.

Our buddy, Murder Brian, who was just on last week's Double, and part of Street Fight Radio had pointed out that Burger King is back, and we've sort of, we've run with that, that Burger King is back. Oh. Is that before Murder Brian said this, correct? Well, he said it on Twitter, and we've said it on the podcast for sure. Oh, he said it on Twitter. Oh, he's right.

Yeah, but I mean. Sam Richardson is a big, we had him on recently. He's a big Burger King advocate. Burger King is making strides right now, but I will say that Burger King suffers from serious consistency issues. Are you okay? Yeah, I'm fine. What just happened?

He just grabbed a candle. Did you grab the lick of a candle? Why did you do that? Why did you do that? It had been on for too long. Why? Huh? It was just on for too long.

Are you all right? I think that I can control fire now. Control. Like pyro. Cool. Can you think of, what other chains come to mind in terms of great consistency or terrible inconsistency? Well, yeah.

Del Taco is unfortunately pretty inconsistent. Burger King, as we've said is Burger King is the king of it. Yeah. It's a burger. Yeah. Del Taco. Hmm. I think you got to look at places like, you know, your fat burgers or your.

Oh, shit. Fat burger is definitely one. Yeah. It's kind of bad lately. Yeah. I mean, so it's just, it's just, it's just very location dependent. And I know that's a local to LA chain. I think In-N-Out is always good.

In-N-Out is very consistent. In-N-Out is the opposite. Yeah. They're so good. Yeah. It's like a boy. It's Duncan is whatever region you're in that, that was, is, it is similar to that region. Cause like the, the Duncan's out here are not as good as like the Duncan's of the East

Coast. They're all similar. Really? The Duncan's out here are also very clean though. Yeah. Did you have a Duncan in Quincy that like was the one that you went to all the time? Cause you knew it was the best in the area? Of course.

Cause there are like four in my hometown on the same mile road. And there's one that was the best and there's one that was 24 hours, but sucked. Yeah. Always. Everyone has their own, everyone has their Duncan. Yeah. I've been with Duncan Donuts for the first time somewhat recently and I thought it was great.

Really? Yeah. I had like a breakfast sandwich that that was recommended to me to get and it was really good. Duncan's great. I love Duncan. I love Duncan. I like Duncan.

I love to hear this, especially when you were saying that, especially cause you said you're a snot. Did you have a bagel at all or no? No, I, this just comes from like, I wasn't really like allowed to eat a lot of fast food when I was growing up. So I just didn't like, I think I've always, even as an adult thought like, oh, this is like a bad food. I'm not supposed to eat it.

Right. I'm like, I'm an adult. I can eat whatever I want. That's been a bad thing for me. I know it's going to start to be a bad thing because I only just realized this. Zach, I think that yes, there is consistency issues, but then also I don't know if I'll ever know if the kind of a side is good because I don't know what the deal is. Yeah.

I don't know why I tried, especially hearing, hearing from you that it's so. Yeah. I did a follow-up call where you're on a bridge and you're about to drive off into the water. Unless you agree with him. So I will agree with you, whatever it takes for that to not happen, but yeah, I, I, I don't know from what I've had of the carne asada so far, it hasn't been great. I will try it again.

Yeah. And maybe I'll try. I haven't had a carne asada burrito there and that will be interesting to try. Yeah. Because that to me, I don't know, that should be good. You know what I mean? It's burrito. If you mess up a burrito, you got serious problems.

That's that thing of like having a bad bagel. If you have a bad carne asada burrito, then what the fuck is that's like, why you wasting my time? Why the fuck are you wasting my time? Well, if you have a question or comment on the word, hold on a second. Yeah. What are, what are some of your bagel, what are some of your favorite bagel places? Uh, I mentioned them earlier.

Yeah. She said them earlier. Oh yeah, she did. I think it was when you were watching basketball. I'm looking the other way. If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email us at doughboyspodcast.gmail.com or leave us a voicemail at 830 Godot. That's 830-4636844.

And to get the doughboys double our weekly bonus episode, join the Golden or Platinum Plate Club at patreon.com. She's got to tell me off here. She's got to tell me off here because I'm not listening to this episode. I don't listen to any episodes. Why would you? Uh, Jenny Pearson, thank you for being here. Thank you for having me.

It was wonderful. You are, you are a delight and you have a podcast of your own that's in the works. Oh my gosh. Is it okay for me to even talk about it? We told you that you should have a podcast. We said that you got to do a podcast. What's wrong? I'm just nervous.

No, it's good. The stakes are extremely low. That's what I'm hoping. Yeah, but it still feels like, you know, everybody's doing, am I getting in the game late? No, no, no. I don't know. We thought we were getting into the game late and that was like, fucking four years

ago. Okay. Five years ago. I mean, it's just for fun and freedom. It's just to be, to have fun. Yeah. But I'm going to, uh, I mean, I think, you know, early next year, I'm going to have a podcast.

It's going to be called Trish talk. Trish talk. I like it. It's like a morning show, but for any time. Oh, that sounds great. That rules. So look out for that. And don't talk to me.

Nobody talks to me. Unfortunately, we can't guarantee that. Yeah, we can't guarantee that. And this is fucked up to say, but I say it all every episode, listeners docks away. No. I'm so scared of that. Anything else you want to plug, Jenny? Uh, uh, I don't know.

You can look out for me in an auto trader commercial. I think I've seen that auto trader. Are you a Viking woman? I'm a Viking woman. Yeah. That's fucking awesome. I have seen with Eric Edelstein. With Eric Edelstein.

Yeah. Man. What? It's cool. Yeah. It is cool. Derek Waters directed it. Can you believe that?

That's right. Wow. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome.

That's awesome. That's awesome. Derek Waters directed it. Can you believe it? That's right. Wow. Of drunk history fame. Of drunk history fame.

What a world. Imagine. And Dave Nier is in another one. And Dave Nier is in another spot. Can you believe it? Very funny. Very funny people in those. We're very lucky people.

What a small world it is. Yeah. Huh? It's a small world. It is. It's a very small world. We know these people and they're on TV. That's what, okay.

Sure. You're going to be in a movie. That's true. Ghost, now the tomorrow war. It's called the tomorrow war. Oh. Now I'm going to be in a movie audience. You're going to go?

Yeah. You're just no way you're going to go. I'm going to see my podcast co-host and good friends movie. I hope so. In the theater. Of course I am. I'm excited for you. It sounds like you are.

I'm excited. Jesus. On your behalf. I'm going to rent out a theater. Why is you're going to come? I would love to come. That's also unnecessary. You need to rent out a theater.

The Kodak Theater. Wow. I thought you meant like the UCV Theater. Yeah. That seems way over budget. That'll do it for this episode of Doe Boys. Until next time, for The Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell, I'm Nick Weigher. Happy eating.

See ya. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys.

Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys.

Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys.

Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. Doe Boys. So the amount of ahs has attractedQUEEN members to join us in One Piece TV on Every Friday tonight at 6cktCAP Time. Tonight on K? Friday on KTV.

Full list of sources available in the episode description.