Doughboys - Olive Garden 2 with Joel Kim Booster

Episode Date: May 3, 2018

The ‘boys welcome actor and comedian Joel Kim Booster (Conan, The Week Of) to discuss midwest eats, how to get fired from service jobs, and to review the Italian-American chain he worked at as a server for two years: Olive Garden. Some day-old pasta gets taste tested in another edition of The Leftovers.Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In 1866, Cad Walleter Washburn opened the Minneapolis milling company to compete with another local miller named C.A. Pillsbury. Washburn and Pillsbury merged businesses just three years later, and though Pillsbury's name endures, it was Washburn's savvy that powered the company, leading to a succession of mergers, acquisitions, and engineering innovations that made Minneapolis in the flower capital of the country. In 1928, Washburn's company converged with four other mills to form General Mills, a massive conglomerate that even today is a titan of the food industry.

Over the decades, General Mills generalized its business beyond mills, launching the iconic Betty Crocker brand, expanding into the toy industry with the creation of Play-Doh, and even dabbling in military hardware, developing submarines and high-altitude balloons in conjunction with the Navy. In 1970, GM added another row news source, Restaurants, acquiring an upstart seafood chain known as Red Lobster. The shellfish concept success led to General Mills establishing a separate restaurant division, which would later become known as Darden, and in 1982, General Mills launched an Italian-American

restaurant in Orlando, Florida. Calculated from day one to be a nationwide brand with mainstream appeal, it was a quick hit, becoming the fastest growing sit-down chain of the decade. Other than pizza, Italian food was uncommon in those swaths of the U.S. without sizable Italian-American populations, so GM's admittedly generic take became many Americans' entry point to the cuisine. The restaurant's value-oriented marketing was reflected in its original slogan, Good Times Great Salad, referencing its still-signature-all-you-can-eat-salad, soup, and breadsticks.

Though today its slogan has shifted away from gluttony, first with, When You're Here Your Family and Now We're All Family Here, a welcoming greeting from an eatery coldly-conceived as a profit center by one of the most powerful food conglomerates on Earth. This week on Doughboys, we return to Olive Garden. Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Nick Weiger, alongside my co-host, Guillermo Del Taco, Mitchie Two Spoons, Mike Mitchell. Hey, Gratio Maker. A day, Del Toro?

Del Toro. Oscar winner. Oscar winner. That award-winning roast was courtesy of Jean-Paul Ruby. If you have an insult you'd like me to use on Mitch at the top of the show, roastspoonmanatgmail.com is the address. Yeah, that roast wins an award for biggest asshole who sent it in. Fuck that guy.

You know, Mitch, speaking of Del Taco, they opened up a new Del Taco near where we live right by our apartment, within a one-mile radius. By your apartment. By my apartment. Yes. Nick and I have not, even though it will happen, do you think me, you, and Natalie are gonna move in together at some point? I think, I think we should just turn it into a polyamorous triad, except one where nobody

fucks. We're both just getting cuckolded constantly. That sounds about right. Yeah. I just, I just felt even more for just the ease of, you know, we could record the podcast, come downstairs. I'd be just waking up. I think what we, what needs to happen is we need to legally adopt you.

I think that's probably the easiest. I like that idea. Yeah. Actually, you know what that means. I'm gonna slip on my dypey. That's fair. If you adopt me as a child, I get to wear a dypey. We have that, we have that rearing phase that we'll go through.

We'll do it quick, like Billy Madison style, where I'll go through each age in a couple weeks. We'll have an accelerated period where I change your dypey and then I also nurse you. And we'll put that up on the Patreon. That'll be the $10 here. You get to wear, first of all, you get to wear, I want you to wear like nursing breasts, you know what I'm saying? Right.

And I want it to be filled with chocolate milk, bubble juice, chop chip, as I call it. Of course, bubble juice, chop chip, milk, milk, which I just wanted to finish my anecdote real quick. There's no, there's no, I don't know why I just, I feel because I started it, I feel like maybe people want closure. It's not interesting, but I say they open a new Del Taco right where, near where Natalie and I live, a stone's throw. I hit that bad boy up like, so frequently now, I went last night, a dozen times in the past

like week and a half. It's getting out of hand. You're going almost every other night. Yeah. I need to stop. It's too much. It's excessive. No way.

I want to see, I want to see fat Liger. Well, he'll make a comeback. Also, you're going to have to get a, if I, if you, if I do go into this baby mode, which I plan on doing. Yeah. I'm a pretty big baby Bjorn, huh? You think I'm going to carry you around in a Bjorn? That's a part of it.

I want to say a little, how to, how to Mitchy Two Spoons Nation. I'm embarrassed that the guests had to see that. I'm embarrassed when any guest has to see it. And here is, here's a little drop. Hey, it's me, Mickey. Hello there folks. What the fuck? Quite goofy.

I'll make you a pet. I'll take away your talking rights. I'm going to lose my agency. There you have it. You know what? He's our good, he's our good drop guy. We have one. We have one of those.

Robert Persinger. Okay. He does a great job. Yeah. That was a lot of fun. Nice little bit of audio editing. Robert, he signed off Robert Drop King Persinger. Whoa.

Getting a little cocky there. Tone it down, Persinger. Also, I think, Hey, you know what? I think you're the drop king. You're a, the slop king. Oh shit. Yeah. That's right.

I just hit with the Persinger. Well, good. Now he's going to roast you in one of the upcoming drops. It would be great. He also, in the, in the drop, like the, you know, it's like a sound cloud. Yeah. And within it, there's a picture of Goofy, but he's, I wanted to show you this. He's like the, he's like a, like a fat Goofy.

Oh, that's fine. I hope this doesn't play again, but like, like this thumbnail, this looks like an old school fact. Oh yeah. Right. He's like old school. Yeah. Old school.

Yeah. Well, was that, was that like a period of time? I mean, like, I don't think there was an, you know, some, some Disney, some house of mouse acolyte out there will probably know the exact history of, of when, if Goofy had a Zatvig period, but I think he was, I really think that he, that was probably like an episode where he just ate a bunch and he got fat and that was like a joke that I'm, that, that's just my guess. He plumped up a little bit, but that wasn't a long period of.

So am I just on episode one of my life? When does the second episode going to start them all thin again? Yeah. That'd be great. Five years and you have a relationship with the woman who took care of you when you're a boy. Wait, what? You know the classic episode one to episode two arc.

I should have gotten that. Yeah. I apologize. I didn't. Hey Mitch. Yeah. Let's introduce our guest. It's been too long.

He's an actor and stand-up comedian from Conan and at midnight. His album model minority is available now. Joel Kim Booster. Hi Joel. Hello. Thank you for being here. Thank you for having me. Long time listener, first time caller.

Oh boy. It's always great to see where these things are recorded. I really like that you have a picture of yourself on the display. Mitch. That's really impressive to me. I, you know, I explained that just we touched on that in a recent episode with our with our buddy. Sheer.

I got to say this about it. It's not intent that I would never put up. First of all, I don't like looking at myself if I had my way all mirrors would come down in the world. Oh boy. That's weak. Look, and this isn't a pro vampire stance. I have here.

I'm not trying to get rid of the mirror so that vampires can blend in more with the regular people. I'm saying this because I don't like to look at my body right or my face and it feels like a late season black mirror episode once they run out of all the ideas they're gonna get there soon enough. Oh yeah. They're probably already there. I think I would never put up.

I mean like this just happened naturally and then you know what my mom saw it and my mom liked it. And then you got to keep it. I got to keep it. If mom likes it, mom likes it. It's a conversation piece and you're too hard on yourself about your looks. You're a good looking guy. Yeah.

You have terrible taste. Joel, you were telling us before we start, you grew up in Chicago. I did. Well, I grew up to be fair to people listening who will call me out. I grew up in the Southwest suburbs of Chicago. And then I did to be fair move there to the city proper after college and got it for many years. But yeah, it was great.

I love it. So a big food town, the Midwest, a big food region, is there, you know, obviously everyone talks about the pizza, the hot dogs and you know, that's, I think that's what people think about it. Do you have any affection for it? Well, here's the thing. Like I always started saying this before, but like I don't really like to delve into like regional food debates because they're just stupid.

But I will say a couple things about the foods of Chicago since I've moved. I lived in New York for many years now and now I just moved here. Right. But first of all, deep dish pizza is not Chicago pizza. Not in my mind. Chicago, real Chicago pizza is thin, very thin crust in squares. Like that is Chicago pizza and deep dish pizza shouldn't even be called pizza, honestly. I like it.

I like it, but it's not our pizza. But a lot of people tweet that at us, that they think Chicago pie is more of a thin crust. Yeah. And a few places that I've got the who sent us those pizzas. Now I can't remember. That's rude of me. Pizanos.

Right. And there's like a thin crust there that I had that I love. They sent us a freeze dried pie that thin crust was out of this world. Yeah, it was. It was delicious. And yeah, no, that's that's funny. Like a lot of people who live in Chicago are like, I don't eat deep dish a lot. Nobody does.

I think I've eaten deep dish. When I lived in Chicago, I ate deep dish maybe twice. It was something growing up in the suburbs. It was a much bigger thing. I think because we were, we bought into the lie of deep dish, but it's like too much. Right. It's like who it's unwieldy. I can't do it.

But I will say this. Chicago hot dogs are the best. It's impossible to find a hot dog that is quite like a Chicago hot dog anywhere else in the country. New York hot dogs are bullshit. Wow. They really, really are. It's so hard.

Even anything like class of any, I hate going to other cities cause some controversy. People come at me, find me on Twitter. I hate Joe cam is my handle DM literally it's their, their trash and there are so many places in New York that would like sell a Chicago style hot dog quote unquote and it was garbage. They're always garbage. I actually just got back from Australia to like yesterday, the land down under I went to excuse me next. It's the land down under you.

That's great. Dialect. I just also want to say that you excitedly yelled out the land down under when you heard that he was came back from Australia. Hey, you know, we have some Aussie listeners. I partly got Australia on the brain because of Joe Ingalls outstanding playoff performance and for the Utah Jazz, but sorry, I apologize. I was, I stepped on there.

There was no reason for me to shout out the land down under. No, I derailed. I derailed what your anecdote. Go ahead. I feel pointless now. In this show, I went to I went to like a Coney actually the the park that Coney Island was based off of this park was built first and then the same people went and went over and built Coney Island, the oldest roller coaster in that hemisphere, which is not a selling

point for me. Personally, I don't I wouldn't lead off with that right literally I'll get to the food in a second. But the person who runs the roller coaster, which is the same roller coaster at Coney Island stands on the roller coaster the entire time, like literally stands operating the roller coaster and it and it split our group because half the group was like, well, if this dude's standing, then I feel fully safe because obviously if he can stand on it while it's going, then what what could happen to us?

But I was so I was sitting right behind him as he was standing and I was so uncomfortable the whole time because I was like, he's going to die. This man will die. This man will fly off. How many employees do they lose every year to this roller coaster? No, he's not like hooked into it all. He's truly just chilling on the roller coaster as it's going down these hills standing in the front of the car in the middle of it in the middle of it.

Wow. And it was wild and I hated every second of it. It was I couldn't enjoy the roller coaster because I was so concerned for his safety. But I got I went and I ordered a hot dog from the thing and I'll show you guys the picture later, but it is it was the most disgusting thing I've ever seen visually it tasted terrible orally. I mean, it was making sounds just every sense was bad. But yeah, hot dogs are a big deal.

Claudia. We had Claudio Dardi on here and she kind of said that she gave Australian food a little bit of a hard time. But what is it? What about the hot dog specifically was so repulsive? It was so much bigger than you could ever imagine. And not lengthwise, like width wise, it was wider than a sausage and it sort of it curved in a very phallic way, which as a gay person should have done something.

I should have liked it more than I did. Oh, and then weirdly so like I actually I ordered the hot dog and they sort of the way that it was described. It sounded like a New York hot dog with mustard and sauerkraut, right? And that sounded good to me. They put all the sauerkraut and mustard in like the bun to piled on the bun and then set the hot dog on top of the bun. Yeah.

So it's not even practical to eat like you guys all flip when I show you the pic. That's one of those things where that's just like the it's like the game of telephone that resulted in that food. It's like not really the way you would do it. And just it just enough is different where it's not at all an accurate representation of what that of how it should be. I think this is just the classic thing of it's it's Australia down under and then the they put it in reverse.

They've got the ingredients in their first and then the hot dog. It's it's like how the toilets go backwards down there. Now obviously Claudia has more context for this than I do because she's from there, but I've been now to Sydney and Melbourne for extended periods of time and Melbourne less so than Sydney. By far. Melbourne's actually like a pretty decent food city, but I mean the food is just not great.

Yeah. I don't understand what happened. It's a well. It's a giant prison country, so you get prison style food, prison style food. Yeah. Isn't that originally what it was? It was a prison. It was a penal colony and then they they really turned it around.

They made it. They built a roller coaster. They built a crazy roller coaster and yeah. I was in Disney with my mom and sister. Just not as cool as Australia, but it is. We want to we we plan on going to Australia. We're going we were going to go this summer. I don't know.

There's a big discussion about it. I don't know if it's going to happen. My mom heard about the hot dogs down there, but I was just thinking about Stan. Like we rode Space Mountain. My mom almost died. I mean, she like was like, I'll do it. And then she at the end of it, she was like and like was like, I can't like if it went again, like maybe my mom would have had to have medical assistance or something.

I just stressed her out so much or yeah, you know, the writing in that right. I'm just just thinking of someone standing up. I'm like, I feel like if you stood up in that right, you'd lose your head, right? Like, I mean, the other thing, like there were parts of the roller coaster where if you couldn't put your hands up because yeah, it was not a well designed roller coaster and I'm not into wood, like any sort of roller coaster that gets shut down in the rain. Yeah, right. Come on.

Those rickety wooden rain can take you out, then it's not. It's not safe. I don't think I should get rid of it. Exactly. What do you do in the rain? I would. What do I do in the rain? Yeah, you know, with your inner circuits and all, I tell you, that's the only time I'm

happy. You're only happy when it means surely Manson pees a pod. There was a water. You guys are talking about getting, you know, having some sort of injury from standing up in a roller coaster and there actually is some sort of law on the books or some sort of tests they do because there was that that water park. I was looking it up real quick where that kid got beheaded so grisly. By the way, I just want to give a little background on this.

Weigher talked about this for a good like six or so days of the boy who was beheaded. It's horrifying. It is a horrifying, terrible thing. But also a fascinating story because every element about it, the world's tallest waterslide, they built in Kansas at a Schlitterbond water park, which is like a micro chain that's kind of janky. But the thing that's crazy about it is that the designers were just these ambitious guys who had no engineering experience.

Oh, that's great. So yeah. So they basically made this death trap and then, you know, like people were getting injured for years on this thing, like horrible neck injuries and like broken limbs and they just covered it up. They just like made their young staff just like cover like their lifeguards and their people who worked at nursing station. They just made them cover it up until there was one whistleblower and then that happened

around the same time this kid got like this 10 year old kid who happened to be the son of a prominent politician literally got beheaded going down this waterslide. This is crazy. Yeah. I feel like the true villains in this piece are the life, the people that were the like, who has such loyalty to a water park that they're like, no, we have to keep our mouths shut and protect. Yeah.

Right. That's a good point. Well, I had a lot of jobs at 16 and I did not care enough about any of them to let people get injured on them without saying something. I wonder if I wonder if I would have been one of the brain while I bet you I probably would have secrets for them. Yeah. I think I could.

I think as a kid, I could have very easily covered something up if they were just like, hey, the guy broke his toe. It's fine. We gave him a free pass. Like it just, just, you know, I think I could, I could probably be talking. I like to think like I'd be the good, you know, I'd be like, oh, no, I'd stand up for it. Not the good son.

Come on. It goes bad news. Oh yeah. It goes bad. Yeah. The regular son was good. Yeah. I think I was the regular son.

Yeah. I'm good. And I'm a little bit more like Mac. We all know that. This isn't my story to tell, so I won't use any of the names, but I can tell it. But a friend of mine, when he was young, went to Disneyland and they went to the water park there. The Polar.

What is it? I'm not a Disney. Oh yes. Yeah. Yeah. I went there too, I believe. He went down one of the water slides. So it was, it was one of the ones where they had to climb up and his older brother went

down first, and then it was him and his mom, and his older brother's head got impaled on something. Good God. And he didn't die. But in order, because it was so tall, they were like, the quickest way to get down is to go down the slide. No. So him and his mom had to go down the slide through his brother's blood, and then by the

time they got down to the bottom, literally they like took him to the hospital and like, by the time they got to the hospital, Disney was there with like six lawyers, like black cars, everything. And he's fine, but like they go to Disney now, they can go for life for free whenever they want. They just like can't, they like couldn't sue Disney ever. And everything is fine, although my friend says his brother is a little more aggressive now.

Oh, wow. And they'll always wonder if it was because he was impaled at Disney. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe he's had like minor brain trauma. Yeah. But he's like otherwise fine. Like has a job is doing great.

He's thriving as much as a person. One is impaling and you get lifetime free. I know. And the thing is, it's like you do weigh it because you're like, well, if he's mostly fine and it's like I don't know. And also like maybe the impaling would take out like some of my anxiety or some of the bad part. Yeah.

That's a roll of the dice, I think for you. I just wonder what would be what would be strong enough to penetrate your skull? Yeah, I wish I could remember the specifics of what impaled him on the waterslide, but unfortunately, because again, if not my story to tell, I am leaving out some important details of what exactly it could impale you on a waterslide. I'm surprised, Nick, you and I haven't ridden one of these death rides like we should. We should ride that slitter bond, the slitter bond slide or whatever. And I don't think you can write it anymore.

No, he's been closed down. I can't write many slides. I feel like they call me the clogger, that guy's gonna go straight to the earth's core. Yeah, I will say that story. And I was literally grabbing the sides of my face as you're telling it, because it's horrifying. To me, there's something so grisly and unnerving specifically about the roller coaster slash theme park mishap that results in someone being maimed or killed. Because the whole thing that's fun about theme parks is like, oh, it's the perceived danger.

It's like, oh, I'm being, you know, I'm like having fun, but I'm not actually in danger. I think I'm scared, but there's no real danger. But then you read about these things, and it happens so frequently. It's like if you went to see horror movies and then one out of every 100,000 people that saw a horror movie, the killer in the movie killed that person. Jason jumped out of the screen and killed them? There was a 0.0001% chance. Like the beginning of Scream 2.

Yeah, exactly. Someone gets murdered in a bathroom at a horror movie one in ten times. I won tickets to Scream 2 on a not WZLX, but WBCN. That seems like a trap. You know what? I think it was a weird, I got there and I was underage and they just like let me in because I wasn't, I wasn't 18 yet, but it was like one of those things. I called into a radio show and like one, I'd never done that and have since never done

that, but I called in in one tickets to a Scream 2 premiere and that is, you know what? It was like a premiere and stuff like that, that opening was, that worked really well. Yeah, I can watch it. And then also the Wayne's brothers, they did their version of it too. They famously sent it up. They famous. And that was a lot of fun. Those early scary movies are so good.

They maybe laugh a lot. You saw a CGI dick go through a guy's ear, I think it went in one ear and came out the other ear. Yeah, like tickles his, it's like a glory hole situation, like tickles his ear and then it goes in and penetrates his skull and then I think you think he's dead and then he comes back later with his ear bandage. Oh, that's right. I don't know if it goes all the way through to the other side.

Anna Faris. I think it does. What a discovery. I know man. The first Anna Faris movie. How about that? Well, not the first one, but. How about the early ones?

I think those are big break out. Yeah. Yeah. Sure. Hey, shout out to those early scary movies. One and two. Re-watch them. I have no idea if they hold up.

They might not. So please don't hold up. Let us know. Hashtag the scary movies do or do not hold up. I, I, I hate theme parks. I hate roller coasters. I never took a physics class, so I don't understand how roller coasters work and so therefore don't trust them, but I'm constantly afraid I'm going to die, but go too frequently.

Like I just went. My friend forced me to go on his birthday to Six Flags and we wrote everything twice because it was raining in a Tuesday afternoon and I did begrudgingly had a lot of fun. But every single time I think he wanted to kill me because I was just like every time I was like, how many have died on this round specifically? They don't trust it. Did you ride Riddler's Revenge? Uh, maybe that might have been, it was, it was raining, so it might have been closed.

They like randomly closed some of them, but that does sound like one of the ones that we wrote. There's a Batman ride. I haven't been to Six Flags in like 15 years, but there's a Batman ride and then there's the Riddler's Revenge, which they built as a response, I think, to the Batman ride. But there, there was this weird, and I don't know they still have it, but the club music from the line cue at Riddler's Revenge is like stuck in my head. It's like, it's like the Mario thing, it's just like a ditty that just comes into my

head sometimes. I'm a few bars. This is truly insane. Two more minutes of this. This is truly a nightmare. That music doesn't, I feel like I would remember that music, so I feel like we didn't ride that one. Or you know what?

Like a normal human and not remember the music at all. The sad thing about Six Flags is that it just looks like the properties that they are allowed to have. Yes. Are so sad and like I feel like there's like some like I read like Mrs. Taz that they created for Six Flags and like and then and then I saw her and my jaw dropped down to the ground and and heart shot. And then they have like the all even most of the superhero properties.

If you look at like any of the art, it's the it was updated in like 2010, yeah, like almost a decade old. Everything looks it feels like you're not in a good time. It's funny that like nineties has a very, you know, like a very certain aesthetic to it and then 90 stuff and 2000 stuff is just kind of like shitty. Looking. It was a weird. It's a weird time.

It was like I feel like the Whoville at Universal or something is 90s or like a like a just a shitty. It just doesn't look great. Everything is kind of aged poorly from that like like very early 2000s because it's like, you know, like what like the biggest bands were like stained and like limp biscuit. It was like this weird like rap rock was like this big thing in music and then the movie like the early CG like looks so bad in movies like the mummy to the CG and the mummy to looks awful.

It's just nice as well. Is that the is that the rock? That's the Rocks one. Yeah. Oh, the Scorpion King. Scorpion King. The Scorpion King. It's awful.

Yeah. It's like PlayStation one cinematic level and it's like was in a movie. I I took a yoga class yesterday and it was advertised as like it's it's like music is played and it's like music and I was thinking it was going to be like Katy Perry and it's like that sounds fun like that sounds like an energetic class and literally I walk in and the guy is he's like in his forties and he sounds like he's from Jersey and he's like you're good. You got a real good practice.

You got a real good practice and the music was was literally stained Pearl Jam like that kind and I was like this is not what I expected from the yoga class that where it advertised like fun upbeat music right POD. It was actually honestly that was a highlight for me though doing doing a dot downward dog to I feel so alive. I did feel so I was like this actually fits. I don't mind this. That would really catch me off guard because I do yoga and I feel like the the music the

music is always like kind of like hotel lobby. It's like very like sort of you know I question why do you do yoga you got you've gotten the one move that you really ever wanted. All right. Calm down. I did a what's it called the cycling soul cycle. Soul cycle. Right.

I did a soul. I did a soul cycle class and let me tell you not it was not good. It was not the first of all it was like like me and then a couple guys that that like I was there with van buddy Van Roby show good pronunciation. He talked me throughout once it seems like you learned it a van and a couple other people and you know you put on the weird shoes and everything like that and then there's like of course like these beautiful people men and women who just look great and I got on the bike and I almost made it through that whole class there was like five minutes left

and I was like I had to get the instructor. I was like it like I need to get off the bike. I could never and it was in like he couldn't get me off the bike. It was like a disaster like bolted in right your feet are bolted in it's it's a it was a night. It's like that was. I know we bring up Freddie on the show a lot but it's like that's what Freddie would do to me.

He'd bolt my feet to an exercise bike and make me work like and I just spin to win bitch. I think I I think because I grew up and I was so not athletic or good and I had such bad experiences in like gym classes and shit and now I like I can't be in a group fitness class where someone's really enthusiastic. I mean yoga aside like yoga doesn't feel like they're really watching you though like it just I get I'm very bad. I have asthma. I would just be so bad and then their enthusiasm I think would have the reverse effect that

it's supposed to have on me. I would just be resentful. Yeah. Yeah. I don't want to fuck off. Yeah. I just grading fully agree with you. Yeah.

Because it is the thing about the yoga classes. It's like remarkably self-conscious because you are not self-conscious for a group fitness setting because everyone is so kind of in their own world versus like I've done more of the high intensity interval training like fit group fitness classes and that to me I just like man I get why people are like enthusiastic and happy here but like I don't want to high five everybody like that's just like to like I just like this is not the mood I'm in when I'm exercising. No crossfit for you ever.

No, I don't think I could quite it's just not quite the right energy for me. I think I need something a little bit more restrained. I like being by myself when I work out. Sure. I don't want anyone to look at me similar to this mirror thing we talked about earlier. I don't want to be seen looked at thought of in any way. Exactly. I would work out.

You know the one thing I do like about is the darkness. I'd love to work out in the darkness. I'd love to do. Like I said before sun if the sun went away for a year or so I'd be fine with it. You're giving me an idea for a great business model, which is just a gym that is pitch black with no mirrors. It's half sensory deprivation half a gym. Very dangerous.

It seems like there would be a lot of injuries. Heavy weights lifting a lot of kettle bells being swung about in the pitch black. I would sign up. I feel like that's a good that that is right up my alley to not be seen. Nick I was going to say to you. When are we when are we going to have our anapheris breakout you and me when we're going to have our star turn. Yeah.

Well I'd say we're too old. Yeah this is it. This is it. This is it. This is our scary movie. Yeah. This episode with Joel. Oh my god.

You're welcome you guys. Thanks. So I want to we're going to talk all of God today which I know you worked at but before we we get into that you are a fan of the chain Hooters. Oh yeah. What about Hooters that makes you a a excited patron. I think well a it I do think the wings are really good at Hooters. They do have wings.

I think they have a great wing and I do think there it is like a cheeky sort of like this is not for me. You know and I love going into places that are for me that's forcing my way into spaces that I'm that that are not designed for me. And so that was always fun and we did it was started in college because like one of my I went to theater school and one of my friends who is another gay man would always every year have his birthdays at Hooters and just as like a bit and that was like early like us understanding what comedy was and like for us a joke all it all it needed to be was

just us going to Hooters and that was enough of a bit for us. So pretty funny. But then we like I generally really liked it and I think those girls are so lovely and especially when they know that you are not there to ogle or touch them, they just chill out. Yeah, they really just like slot. Suddenly their posture changes you see. I love the relief on their eyes and you just shoot the shit with them and like they're fun. They're fun.

It's a good time place. It's Hooters is I mean as a heterosexual man male with probably negative test house drone like Hooters doesn't Hooters has never repealed to me in the way of like one it is awkward like that whole thing part of it is like I'm like oh man I don't know if I I don't know if I should feel bad. I do I do feel bad but then also I don't know if I should feel bad right and I don't want to be creepy. I'm not comfortable being flirtatious with a woman who's like interested in me, let alone

like a woman who's like that's that you put a perfect well because I think the culture has moved forward enough that it's embarrassing. It's embarrassing to go to Hooters to actually use Hooters for the way it was created and intended to be like for like the people that it's for you watch them in Hooters and you're like how do you live with yourself literally put up some more mirrors in Hooters so they can see how stupid they look. Well it's also the funny thing to be like like stuffed as like stuffed as fuck eating like greasy food and then trying to be like that's the worst way like like that combination

of like sexy with them being stuffed on like there's nothing I like better than being around people who make me hard than when I'm gas like to be gassy and hard to get super full off of chili cheese fries and then have a boner and jack off with your hand covered in wing sauce just the most disgusting combination yeah yeah I like I agree the old spice rub yeah I yeah I don't I don't quite get it I don't quite get the like the merging and it's also there's alcohol too that's the other thing so people are getting drunk so it's like you're getting your like all your vices are covered it's like like your horny and you're drunk and then you're full of like bad food you gotta separate those vices separate separate them up

yeah make them and pick two of three you know what pick one pick one two of three yeah three does seem a bit excessive yeah I worked I've worked at a couple of chains that you guys have covered on this restaurant actually or on this podcast yeah quiz nose was a big one you worked at quiz I did work at quiz nose and subway wow and cold stone creamery wow was actually I came out because of cold stone creamery cold stone creamery for me was like in my town at least was like the underground railroad for gay teens like everyone oh really wow because they open and it's not like I moved to New York and quickly found out that cold stones are not all created equal but like when you're in a small suburban cold stone they really do adhere to like every

they they didn't have job interviews they like went to the theater programs at the high schools and were like we're holding auditions to work at cold stone and like that was really appealing to like loser kids in my town and so like the three high schools it was just purely staffed by the kids who were in the drama department said the three high schools in my town and so I went and worked there I was still homeschooled when I worked there that was my last time being into homeschooled and then after like a summer of working there I was like I need to go to school I need to like do like I need to have like a legit drama program because I was doing like community theater at the time and then my parents are like sure and then literally I went to public school and within a

month I came out of the closet and smoked weed for the first time and drank for the first time it was all their fears realized and all is all thanks to cold stone creamer that's insane yeah what did you fucking public goddamn public yeah it's true what they say it really it they are indoctrinating kids at least my wife is it so like you're you're at cold stone this is like it's it's fascinating to me that you're saying they're holding auditions was that because of like it is kind of a I guess theatrical performance thing working there was really really wanted to push the like performance aspect got it like we not only would we sing when we when we were tipped like we would create like group dances and like like it we went all in a little too much in honestly

that sounds pretty fun though for a high school job oh god it was the best job to have in high school and then I got fired because I called my manager a bitch but you know that's a different story I didn't realize she was a 19-year-old Mormon married to a 31-year-old oh my god wow Stephanie hook I'll use her full name she was a villain she was a full villain nick do you hear that married to a 31-year-old what is that what are you what are you i'm just saying it's the 19-year-old the 31-year-old you can get married to someone that age yeah I know that what are you trying what are you implying are you married to a 19 no I have my wife is older than me she's slight she's 11 days older than me implying that I'm fantasizing about having some

decade I was just I was just repeating the information to you okay what you were emphasizing it for me as if for my benefit I think you and I should go to work at Coldstone because it seems like it's a it can awaken your like it seems like a life awakening place in many ways like we got a life affirming it will get us maybe out of this business and then it was humiliating because I got fired from the cold stone and then worked at the quiz nose directly behind the cold stone wow which is a real downgrade so like on the other like the other side of the block basically there's a strip mall okay and then there was the a freestanding cold stone like right in the parking lot of the of the the strip mall basically and and I just

moved back to quiz nose before then that's an interesting I had a freestanding cold stone I feel like I haven't seen a lot of those that's an interesting well I guess it was like it was in this it was like freestanding with one other thing like a mobile store got it like a smaller strip mall in front of the bigger strip mall so we were at quiz nose before subway and and in your first food service job was was cold stone no my first food service job was dipping dots oh my god which I also got fired from and then went directly into working at cold stone I got fired from a lot of jobs you guys and not all of them because I was bad some of them because I was bad but the dipping dots was weird it was a dipping it's dipping dots stop stall in

the mall just a very like four by four square right and they fired me because I wasn't doing enough work on the down when there weren't customers and my question to that is it's what exactly was I supposed to be doing when I wasn't serving dipping dots like yes but my boss like hid out in a in a Verizon store like catty corner from the stall and watched us all day and apparently I was the one who did the spying boss I know it was so lame and I was like some weird bosses over there it's the midwest every boss is weird but yeah it was crazy and then after quiz in a subway I worked at family video which is a video rental store no food hey I gotta say you sing you sang at cold stone then you went and worked at the famously toasty's quiz no

sounds like a song of ice and fire nick oh my god jesus christ oh jesus this is this took a turn this took a real turn a song singing at cold stone of ice cold stone and fire no I we got it it was pretty like on paper it reads it's just I think that's how a young georgia are martin conceived his series and you can see at Lee Mitch you look like a young georgia are my a jar jar I like jar jar are Martin I think that we should work at cold stone yes figure out our life path get out of get out of comedy yeah I'm down for that yeah I don't know if cold stone is necessarily the I mean maybe that is the great opportunity to say cold stone yeah you know we we went recently you know Nick

Rutherford which was maybe the will be the would have been our most recent episode yes recent episode he also worked at at cold stone and he he too loved it every I feel like everyone who works there loves it we went though he like met his girlfriend there his girlfriend there he said he said he he said he like really came out of his shell when he was working there everybody's coming out of the cold stone a different thing but we went and they don't really sing anymore yeah I think it's I think it's I actually think it's because we're in cities and adults are working there because there are no employment opportunities but you go to a suburb where like teens are still working at them and I think it probably is still like a like that what vibe at least the

last time I went home it is but like once you have full grown adults who are are working there because you know the economy it's not it's a less yeah light and fancy and then you don't want to make them sing no no god no like I would go to one I went to one once in New York City and like New York Times Square and it was just it was so sad it was like going to a women's prison it was not a good experience oh man yeah that's a bummer I yeah it is because like that is like it's supposed to have this sort of joyful vibe and then when you have people who don't really want to be there which is understandable yeah that that kind of removes that element but so let's talk about quiz nose and subway real quick because I'm I'm I'm interested in the the comparing contrast

between the two which one did you like more and and do you have like are these still places you will you will go eat at after your experiences working there I liked working at quizzes better I still eat at subway all the fucking time wow yeah yeah I was actually it's convenient man it's I ate subway so much in Melbourne I was so embarrassed I did it in secret when I was alone because I didn't need anyone else to know that I flew halfway across the world to eat fucking subway but like I have a very specific diet and like subway happens to fit within those dietary needs sometimes yeah it was just nice what's your go to that's a way chicken just like chicken but I prefer an Italian sub if I if I'm if I'm really splurging I tell us I was not bad it's not bad

but it's like all right like a conservatively 17 times the amount of sodium a human being needs right in one day yeah which is the problem with all fast food but I fucking love good and then once they once subway started toasting subs it's like why do we need any quiz nose anymore they really like that because quiz nose was really pushing that toaster oven and then like like within a year they had toasters at every subway and that that was like they the quiz nose thought they had their ace in the hole and then subway was like we got toasters yeah it's fine you think you don't have a patent on toasters yeah it was like a it was like a horse's tail batting away a fly it was just it was an incredible display of strength and you know quiz nose had that little

rat creature as a mascot was all right it was kind of confusing I forgot about that and then subway of course had the wonderful Jared the the siren he was the siren song that pulled people into you have not you have not kept up with news no you are not aware of what's gone on I accused Jared of being what he was before he before it was clear what he was I always thought he was a creep I this is true that he was a creepy weird guy yeah I never liked him didn't specifically know what yeah who walks to subway every day you know what he was to me as a big guy yeah it was like one of those fake fat like it was like one of those like I was like looking at him I was like you look like putty it doesn't it

doesn't look like you did like it like you're reaping all the benefits of losing this weight which look it was a compliment to anyone who's lost weight out there and obviously there but it just there was something that seemed unhealthy about him it looked it seemed like a she seemed like a shortcut man he lost a lot of weight but maybe hadn't done the full body transformation the point where you're like oh wow that guy looks great there's something like I just want to punch the guy in the fucking face and it turned out I was right he sucks and also he was the mascot of sub I mean he was basically the mascot of subway they put so much in their brand on his shoulders yeah they did like 20 years they were like this is our guy you got to diversify subway it's it's

funny because I feel like if quiz nose had made it like subway start toasting quiz nose went away basically right I think I feel like it still exists but it's it's receded a lot I I mean I saw like in kind of the for me it was just such a fuck you is that they they're a quiz nose in uh in Santa Monica got turned into a sub oh wow and that was such just like like you know like we destroy we destroy and this is actually this is almost more problematic than eating at subway more but my favorite sub chain because I fucking love it sub is jimmy johns I like I like jimmy johns is so good yeah and talk about a villain the man who owns jimmy johns is like yeah aggressively like and he knows it and he loves it yeah yeah not a good man not a good man at all but you know what there is no

ethical consumption under capitalism I'm sorry that's right um and I but oh god I I love and the thing is is where I went to school there were three restaurant restaurants quote unquote that you could go to and use your meal plan at that were like basically on campus but slightly off and that was a quiz nose a subway and a jimmy johns so we were well fed with subs oh but you know what we had you guys have out here that we didn't have when I was growing up that I actually have fallen in love with a little bit it's near my apartment is jersey mics yeah jersey makes I think his makes is pretty good all of this of all of like the big chance like I don't I don't like jimmy johns I should have made that quote I don't like it they I mean the added fact of that guy being a piece of shit doesn't

help I'll choose subway I guess over all of them I haven't had quiz nose in over a decade there's no reason to go anymore yeah there's not a lot of they still they're still going strong in the midwest whenever I am like touring in the midwest I see a lot of quiz notes right but we don't have a lot we don't have like potbelly and a few other things that like some oh potbelly is good too yeah yeah there but I feel like I feel like jersey mics is probably the best non like local sub chain that we have out here right I think it's up there I like here's what I like about jersey mics hey they think their sandwiches are pretty good but I also like that you can get that sub in a tub and I feel like that's like like yeah it's it's like the only I feel like sandwich chain

that offers a legit kind of low carb no bread option which is they just give you all the fixings basically as a salad in a in a bowl do you know what I do I order a regular sub I eat it in my tub we'll take a break we'll be back with more dough boys welcome back to dough boys we're here with Joel Kim booster who worked at the olive garden this week's chain and for two years wow so what is this is this is it sounds like you had a series of food industry jobs and was this your first what exactly were you doing there were you're a host I was a waiter yeah it was my first and only waiting job wow I've ever had so what about the because I know this is a this is a chain you you wanted to discuss and I imagine you have some

affection for it still oh yeah I do well because first of all it was growing up in my life was considered the fanciest restaurant my family could go to like I remember it was always an event going to the olive garden like no other and it wasn't even something like if you asked to go on your birthday sometimes they'd be like we just can't that's like that's like a twice a year event for my family so I grew up like loving it thinking it was a pinnacle and then as I got older it was still like cool to go to and then in college I remember when they opened the olive garden in my college down I went to school in central Illinois it there was like a line around the building to get into the olive garden that's that's just more a comment on the kind of town that I went to

school in but yeah it was huge and then you know it was just like I knew I ended up knowing a bunch of people who worked because I got fired from the family video because after four years I got fired I'm starting to think that I'm a bad employee no every single time I've been fired it's been for bullshit but literally I've worked at the family video for four years and I got fired for renting Rachel getting married without paying for it even though this is something that every employee at the family video did it was a dollar rental and I worked with this fucking like late like this fucking loser one night and he saw me doing it and he Mormon he might have been honestly he was just a good fucking mouth breather and then he told on me and I got fired for it and he was like

and he texted he had the nerve to text me after I got fired and be like I can't believe you would put me in that position to either what he are to lie for you or to to tell and I was like lie for me what is the fuck are you talking about you just keep your mouth shut like every other employee at the family video did for four years I give this shit for a dollar but I still have that copy of Rachel getting married and I love it do you uh do you want to shout out his full name as well I wish I could remember because I would I definitely would I'm not doing this because I respect just my bad memory so that girl's name again wait which one the bad oh 70 hook Stephanie Joe hook so the do you work at family video you get terminated there and

then you end up at the Olive Garden rolled right over again but right directly behind the family video to the really that's insane yeah I had to wait on it my old boss is a lot at the Olive Garden oh man he's always very awkward but never did anything to their food you'll all be happy to know we don't really do that a lot or we didn't at this location you know what I heard that yeah I've heard that doesn't actually happen much in right in food service I had a bad taco I had a bad Taco Bell experience the other night the other just the like I guess it's a week or so ago and I should have gone to Del Taco yeah exactly I ordered I ordered like I think I ordered like two burritos and a cheese gordita crunch cheese gordita crunch is the thing I said last

I very specifically said it because I said it twice get up to the window they I looked at my receipt and it wasn't on the receipt and I said hey there's no cheesy gritty to crunch on there I said oh you didn't say it I said yes I did and I said can you add it and he said you got to go around again no he told me I had to go around saying and I was like what but I was like I said it and like I was like but I I asked for it though and I was like come on man I'm not a bad guy methodically was like I'm not a bad guy like I was like I asked for and he's like I would but my boss he's like you got you got to go around and so like one I believe him by the way I think that yeah his boss was being an asshole and over his shoulder well that's when I when I came back

to the window again I said you see you seem like a good guy and I said but your boss might be an asshole like because I because I did I went I went around because I didn't right because I want that was when you got the cheesy gordita crunch you got to have it you got to have the cheesy gordita crunch that's that's what I mean I shouldn't be eating it at all right nobody should be eating the cheese from Taco Bell just in general but yeah but yeah you know Joel actually mentioned try Del Taco I went to Del Taco last night had a similar situation I had a buy one get one free half pound bean and cheese burrito coupon and I said Lakers game no it's not from a Lakers game this is from I just got in the mail um and uh what I got a coupon in the mail I was very excited

to use it like like I we got it that day and I was like I gotta use this tonight uh so I went over there and I ordered again I just I already had dinner so I'm like I'll just get a little bit so I got uh I got this buy one get one free boot bean and cheese burrito and I got one del taco and then I got up there and he had it he was like he's like okay one bean and cheese burrito and one del taco and then I handed him the coupon he's like oh I didn't hear you had the coupon I think you just wanted one fixed it right there for me wow yeah fix on the spot no no problem at all didn't have to do a lap of the drive through maybe I'll knock sounds like Taco Bell just lost a cusp I will never I'll always go there but it did it was you know that it was usually been a

pretty good Taco Bell but their service in the last few months has not been as good yeah that's a bottom I do I love Taco Bell I love a burrito that melts in your mouth in a way that food shouldn't but I was afraid yeah I wasn't I I also went back around and did what they said and I didn't think that I was that bad but when I was at the first I was like what really like yeah because you I that's the right way to react right oh absolutely like what were you talking about I was confused it was reasonable and also too that boss was wrong because from a customer service standpoint they should have just accommodated you yeah like making you like like enforcing that rule is we're there a bunch of people behind you there I then had to wait like 10 minutes oh that

sucks I get I and there was a there was a cockroach I saw when I was in line outside the building he was outside I I get it a little bit more if there was no one behind you imagine yeah right oh yeah oh yeah I'll just drop see you in two seconds I guess yeah which I when I did go back to the window I was like hi cheesy gordita crunch it's me I know it was me but yeah I think a lot of people fear that that something like so it's good to hear that it doesn't happen I mean also don't like don't ever be an asshole I guess is yeah a good a good rule right be nice because also too that's the other thing I think about service workers is like you never know when someone someone's just having a bad day even if you're not getting great service or maybe it's maybe it's

not in their hands I don't know I think you might as well be polite to everybody sorry to keep talking about my trip to Australia but I will say that even like because they pay their everyone a living wage over there and there is no tipping and that's not a part of their culture I weirdly felt safer with the weight staff when we when things would get dicey with them because it's like they don't give a shit right because the reason it happens over here when it or whenever I was tempted is because the power dynamic is so shifted like disproportionately like you you can't do anything because your entire paycheck is in their hands and so like you do shit like that because it's your only recourse right you know you're paying less you're paying you're being paid less than minimum

wage and if you're rude back to these people who are being rude to you they're going to not tip you and then that's where is in Australia they're all just rude back right because they don't give a shit they're like and they're not going to fuck with your food because they're like what does it matter to me I've just you know was rude anyways yeah that's interesting I mean that yeah that would be I think they I think I'm I mean like because tipping exists now I think you should you should tip well and tip generously especially because you know the cost of living in a lot of places has gone up so high but the but yeah it'd be great if tipping went away it was done away with I dated this British guy in New York for a while who knew knew about tipping knew that it was the

thing and I remember we would get in fights about this all the time because he was like it's not my responsibility to make sure that these people are getting a living wage and I was like no absolutely I agree with you it's not it shouldn't be our responsibility but not tipping them doesn't help them in the meantime yeah for sure how do you go from like A to C there that's such a weird way of thinking every time it was his turn to pay I'd have to bring cash and like sneak the waitresses cash yeah out of shame that's great in the bathroom which is like why am I doing this that was it's funny in our lifetime I think the the appropriate tipping has gone from 15 to 20 percent yeah right well I don't you think it was 16 percent at one time it went it's changing to my

dad's lifetime too because I remember when I was working at Olive Garden I'd come home and I'd complain about people who would tip 15 percent my dad would be like that's over tipping and I was oh no that's that's that's specifically what I was I think it was like my mom and dad I feel like when I was a kid it would be 50 like they would tip 15 percent and then if it was really good 20 right yeah and now I feel like 20 percent is the standard it feels pretty standard I I won't no matter how shitty it is I will tip 20 percent unless it's like something so bad I'm willing to talk to the manager about like it would have to be truly egregious because like my thing is is especially after serving it's like we all have bad days and it's also like no matter how shitty

this experience is was their life is infinitely shittier being a waiter so yeah 20 what does it matter well I was also going to say and and you can get you can get into this a little bit first I'm going to say this I didn't we didn't have a lot of olive gardens Emma I don't know if you'll agree with this it's just in new wing I feel like there aren't a ton in New England there was one that was like 45 minutes from your house yeah 45 minutes from your house yeah there there there just weren't a ton like it's kind of like red lobster not a ton of red lobsters I don't know if that's same same company yeah okay yeah and I don't know if that yeah maybe maybe because they're the same company or if it is did you have ruby Tuesdays no really no ruby

Tuesday yeah maybe it's just Darden doesn't have a yeah it could be I mean it started in the south I know that the first the first olive garden in Orlando and it was because you know Darden had red Darden which was part of General Mills had red lobster first and basically came up with the idea of olive garden as a kind of like from whole cloth they were like this is going to be a nationwide Italian chain yeah and so my guess is I don't know if it's it could partly be that they just don't have much of a regional presence in New England because because there aren't many red lobsters up there either right no but I would guess there's also a bit of an overlap of like they have good seafood in New England and they have a native Italian population there that's a population so

that was that was my guess of why right but why the why the fuck would you go to red lobster New England or even honestly even I mean olive garden that was the issue so when I did have olive garden no I think you could still I'm it's not Italian food it's something different and yeah you know some might say better well I'm curious a bit about you uh you working there did you have any like was was there anything you ever observed in terms of people abusing the never ending pasta bowl than ever any breadsticks yeah I mean my thing was is we were in a town that was like a very working class town okay and so there was just so much gaming of the system in terms of that like people would be like I they would just get one meal and then split the meal and then because

and then technically you're supposed to be there's all these rules about the salad like how much salad you bring for two people versus how much salad you bring for four which makes sense and like how many breadsticks you're allowed to bring and like you were so like forced to enforce these rules and people who were gaming and be like I'm so sorry I can't bring you out another bowl for the salad because they're the only person who got a meal with salad and like people wanting to do all sorts of stuff but I mean the the the thing and I don't know if you guys waited tables but you never did allowed most sections in when you have a when you're a waiter so I hear again I've only waited tables at Olive Garden but I have friends who are waiters who have like you know seven

tables at a time or more seven plus that's what I was going to say with as far as the tipping that was going to lead into it is like Olive Garden seems like its own crazy yeah you you were only allowed three tables at a time at all wow yeah maybe four if you were really really good because it is such a fucking hassle to constantly be refilling everybody's breadsticks and salads and all of that stuff that it's such a production it would it would it feel like very very busy just with oh yeah I mean I would I would constantly feel in the weeds with just three tables that's crazy because people's demands and most people would come specifically because they'd want to get they'd want to clear three bowls of salad but and like you know 18 breadsticks before

they even got to their meal which they'd box up and then take home and eat again which I fully respect but it was just like it honestly I would I'm a bit I played a lot less so now but I played a lot of video games when I was growing up and in college and it that is how you'd have to like do your mindset of like any game where it's like task management where you're like paying attention to many things at once and just like doing it if you got in the groove it was actually like very zen right yeah refilling this and then going back and forth and chewing on a breadstick oh I hate to tell you guys but those breadsticks are 350 calories per stick whoa is that insane and I did it I didn't find that out until after I worked there and I would eat literally like 11 of them a shift

and then I would eat a shift meal afterwards like I but when I graduated college I obviously was the happiest I've ever been because I was just drinking a bottle of red wine and night and eating an olive garden four times like that like it was insane 350 I know you don't know how it happens but it's because it's the densest fakest carb ever yeah and then they pilot full of butter on top as well yeah it was just and then what do they put cheese or salt on top of it salt salt okay I will say man I like those breadsticks oh they're so good they're really real and they're so simple but they are good shitty I mean right you can tell that they're not good to I definitely know like the texture of it yeah like a real bread yes yes like you were saying yeah it's like it's

it's like a fake carb or however you put it it's it's so like it's so manufactured and processed and I like last night I just want to say it's nice to me though that it like it does taste like a fake bread because I'm like bread seems like an easy thing to get like a like a normal it's not that hard but that you had we had to make they had to be so quick to make yeah because they oh that makes we go through so many of them and that's the other reason you only have three tables is because like you one person will be put in charge of making sure that there are more breadsticks like one waiter has to like be constantly like putting them into the specially made oven specifically for cooking the fake carb and and like and another person is in charge of

like pre-making the salads and making sure there are enough salads like sitting out so you can just go back and grab one and shit like that and then you know you're expected to like expo other people's food and stuff right but you're not getting paid extra for that so how much yeah you so you got all this side work but but about the breadsticks specifically how are they arriving at the olive garden just in a big garbage bag basically really just like a giant clear yeah frozen bag of breadsticks and then you're just basically I mean it sounds similar to what Subway does with their loves yeah no it's it's pretty yeah it's pretty much the same deal and they yeah you spread some butter on them throw in this special oven that cooks them for the exact amount of time at the

right temperature and and then you're off to the races that's great that's crazy that's bananas and you grab one dip it in ranch take a bite put in your apron and then go out that brought that is good fuel I feel like that's good yeah you're working a shift boy dip it in ranch I wish I thought of that oh yeah I just I'm thinking about it now and I really want to but I don't think I can go back to that life why are you didn't have any pocket ranch on you I've been carrying around loose ranch but yeah I mean I would eat there I would work there like four or five times a week in college and I would eat there every day and I still could eat there that many times wow be sick of it I would make so many people go with me in New York to the

Olive Garden that it was embarrassing or many people well now I would do it less because they closed the one in Chelsea and now only Times Square exists oh that's and the shitty thing about it is that they raised the the one in Times Square the prices are more expensive than the one in Chelsea was which totally defeats the purpose of going to the Olive Garden yeah you're gonna go in a place like New York it's like oh it's shitty but it's at least cheaper it's like a Friday's prices and then when everything is jacked up so that it's like forty dollars a plate you're like wait this is a joke that we've played on ourselves this is not fun I will say that our server last night was concerned about her taking too much time she was remember she kept apologizing to us it was

very expedient service and yeah I didn't feel like it was that yeah yeah but she was very apologetic and was just like wanting to make like like it was actually kind of crazy because we put we put it in an app and the app we got was the loaded pasta chips was that something that that exists yeah I think it's a newer offer is that just like jank nachos it really is just a janky nachos it's basically that yeah and and and I would say that the you know we can get into our food in a second Mitch but but we'd ordered those and like less than I feel like 90 seconds later she came back so so fast but she like she was like oh those haven't come out yet oh boy I'll go check on it and then they came out like within like another two minutes with her so they haven't come out yeah

was insane anyway right and we're like what is she talking about and then it arrives order them it arrives so quickly that I was like this is it's unnerving well and I think part of that is because again like the three table stuff the only way to make money at Olive Garden is turn around gotta have to flip tables constantly otherwise you will not walk out of there with any money and every almost every menu item at Olive Garden is designed to be made in less than 10 minutes except for the steaks oh man like everything could come out in 10 minutes if you didn't course it out correctly that was the other big thing is because of the fucking salad and breadsticks you had to be so careful about how you'd have to like guess how cheap a person was how much

fucking salad they eat because you'd have to course everything out to exactly the right time otherwise like if they if your if their meal came out before they had had their second bowl of salad people would be furious wow that's that it it feels too fast yes that was like an issue like I wish that they had taken a bit more but I will also say that if we went at what five it was 545 yeah we went pretty early in the evening 530 on a Monday night to the Glendale location which I think is a pretty new Olive Garden actually yeah it's not too old but but they were there were there were quite a few people in there already at five families 530 on a Monday night which which was crazy to me make sure can I say something that I found I was like I saw it and I was like

oh that's nice the there's a group of family about six next to us with some young kids their food came out they said a prayer oh I was like oh that's nice don't push this shit on me it's very wholesome fuck that shit yeah I think that's actually awful yeah I think it's terrible I think they're pushing their religion onto their children they didn't have a choice right maybe some of those kids didn't want to say a prayer and you don't know what God they were praying to either that's true and give me a Bart Simpson's grace any any day of the week rub a dub dub thanks for the grub level what is it what did he say something better than that obviously I think it's similar I've heard that one before and I guarantee you that that prayer was

just as much for you as it was for God theater it was theater they wanted people to see them doing the dough boys are here well let's say a prayer it was it was there were there were some nice families and they were there and you and I family we ruined we ruined many experiences wait explain the past to not okay so here's here's the well let's get into our meals and I'm curious about what you had on your trip as well Joel so we got the I started off with the the meal on my tie which is Malibu rum grenadine and amaret a liqour with pineapple juice and sour mix my god did you ever make any of the fruit or cocktails I definitely would drink like some we would also our big thing was we would pour and this is a different time I would not do this now

yeah we would fill a to go cup with muscato and then just like a little pinch of like raspberry lemonade and then off you go that sounds to the night that was the that was what everybody did there I would definitely take some of those drinks not I don't think the Milan my time was something that I personally partook in but man I used to love those the more ingredients that used to be it would be like yes this means it's better and now it's like I can't do anything beyond like a whiskey and one mixer right or like a negroni is like as many ingredients as I think I can handle on a drink now this chain restaurant go for it I was just gonna say did you ever bring any like breadsticks to like a college party or my roommates loved me because I would just

constantly be bringing home bread like bags and bags of breadsticks yeah and other miscellaneous foods my friend Randy worked at a pizza place in Ithaca and he came home one night with like a backpack full of pizza and it maybe is maybe my highlight from college just opening up that backpack and getting into like like 20 slices of pizza my my lesbian aunt tam who lived in our basement for many years worked at McDonald's and they would just throw out certain foods or that they were saving that didn't get eaten so there was like a year when I was like nine where our outside our garage fridge was full freezer was full of McDonald's breakfast wow what a fucking dream yeah that's amazing that's like a freezer full of breakfast burritos and egg McMuffins like it was

the best you're a hero you and Randy that those those those those are that's a hero level in college to be able to bring home food like that yeah yeah I had a guy I mentioned I think I may have told the story on this show before but I there was a a friend at high school who worked in a movie theater and he came in once with just a like a lawn-sized garbage bag just full of movie hot dogs and people were like kids were like eating them and I was gonna eat one of these room temp hot dog you fucking snooty piece of shit no that's where I that's where I draw the line but so the Malibu round my tie was these chain rest on cocktails are so sweet it was very very I thought it was it was kind of nice but I couldn't finish it I had a few sips and you

know it's it was just a little a little too a little too sweet and a little too juicy for me the loaded pasta chips what you're asking about homemade pasta chips with a layer with Italian cheeses and a hearty meat sauce topped with cherry peppers and Alfredo drizzle the cherry peppers Mitch were absent they were absent and the chips I think were just so stale all these these they were terrible this this was a was it real low light what are pasta chips as far as we could tell it's like it's like uncooked pasta that's what it that's what it seemed like it was really bad that were in the shape of chips if they were they were they were that's such a horrendous idea I who thought of that I have no the chefs in fucking Roma Italy or wherever

or who are making all the recipes for all of garden should be ashamed of themselves this was a miscalculation these this was the worst thing I had which by the way when I was trained they they told us that that was real you know they actually have that kitchen that kitchen in Italy and my our trainer Julie who was just the biggest fucking nerd who and I was like Julie it's not real right and she's like no I've been there and I was like you absolutely have not been to the all of garden like recipe kitchen in fucking Italy it just it doesn't exist doughboy strip yeah I might go to Italy this summer a bunch of Quincy you gotta please ask around he's just beg people on the streets I know it's here I would love to find the all of

garden main kitchen I wonder if it would be if like we would get the shitty pasta chips that we got in that in the these things were like they were fucking bad you got to go to Italy and at every restaurant be like do you have pasta chips you know pasta chips authentic pasta I just want some pasta nachos it was in like I mean you you kind of pointed this out Nick but there was chicken in it there wasn't supposed to be chicken in it was what yeah oh there was not supposed to be it wasn't listed on the menu oh what the fuck yeah there was like extra super foolish chicken I think someone I think it was maybe a newish thing that they didn't quite know how to make it was really ordered it was a total is that that's fucking disgusting total myth it

doesn't sound like rocket science to me yeah right it was a bolognese on some pasta honestly like a nacho that is like like a bolognese based nacho doesn't sound bad to me it seems like it could work I think they were just a very Italian cheeses exactly I think they were just very resistant to using tortilla chips which would have just made it better yeah and then Mitch what was it tell it walk us through your cocktail real quick it was a mute now I forget the name you know what I thought you would know it it's probably a it was probably it was some sort of it was probably made just been a Milan mule it was just they just changed Moscow to an Italian city right it was it was no I don't think it was a yeah you're I mean that's a

Tuscan mule it was like a like a there was like wasn't there like lemon lemon cello in it or whatever am I saying that incorrectly no that's right um there uh hold on I'll find out the exact name for it but what it turned out to be was basically just a Moscow mule with a little bit of of raspberry in there which by the way I'm not I'm I haven't been drinking at all that sounds right and so this was my way and I actually did enjoy the drink I thought the drink was nice it was kind of like a like a Moscow mule with a little bit of raspberry right yeah that's not a flavor profile that I'm opposed to yeah that sounds fine it was good go on Nick and then for our on for my entree and this is a I assume something that got ordered pretty frequently

York their Joel the tour of Italy this was our server's recommendation she was again yes she was very helpful very accommodating that's what she recommended though you know I think she was looking I think she was like this happens to me a lot and and and my lovely wife Natalie points this out is that I think people assume I'm a rhub like I look I look like a mark you you are you are a I am something of a rhubes so I like I kind of have that but project that vibe of like okay this square let's get him you know let's let's take care of this well I have to say like look at your face you have the voice of someone who eats a lot of food you have the face of a picky eater my interesting you have the face of a person who has a lot of food allergies right I imagine

I can kind of see where she's coming from yeah but I I'm surprised that she would suggest that right but I look like I might be finicky yeah you look like you'd be like the kind of person who's like I just like two ingredients in a meal got it yeah that makes sense so yeah I don't I don't blame her for make for jumping to that conclusion but the tour of Italy was her recommendation three on one plate chicken parmesan a lasagna classic Alfredo they say they're wrong chicken I called chicken parmesan it had an extra a it yeah I pronounced the Italian all right well what would be the two ingredients that he likes I feel like one of them is human blood ketchup ketchup and human blood I found out the name

of my cocktail it was a raspberry Italian ice mule okay oh not worth it yeah why that extra ice in there I don't know was it a frozen drink it no it was not no I have the lemon cello in there is it lemon cello you know what I think it is Italian ice is a dessert again this there's such a simple solution here they should just change Moscow to an Italian city would have been fine Milan mule makes more sense in Milan my tie yeah definitely all right look I'm not here to punch up the names their menu items um yeah go on should I say what I got it's going to your entree I got the giant meatball in Manicotti which was a giant meatball which was so much more giant than I ever would have guessed it to be it was huge and then it was

like you were eating your own a head Jesus it did I mean it it was it was it was big yeah and I don't know if it was my head big because that's insane but but and then two and two Manicotti underneath that such as such a strange combo like it really does feel like they just threw a few things at the wall and we're like it's going to be giant like throwing darts it'll be like a giant meatball and two Manicotti okay that's it you know our our server suggest she I pointed out that in the Bolognese and she's she suggested the giant people she said that she loved it was great the meatball was and this is exactly what I was afraid of I was like this meatball is giant it's gonna be like cold and not cook it right and not fully cooked and I

got it and it was so dense so just so dense and so not so not warm and she was like sorry took a while to like cook your meat she she basically was telling us that it took a long time which we didn't think it took that long it didn't take very long at all and she was like because of the meatball and then the meatball just was not hot and then the Manicotti under it was insanely hot like the like like like so hot that it was like I couldn't touch it for a couple of hours I wish I would have gone with you guys because I think I could have just told you the right things to order yeah she sounds like an idiot oh boy also apologizing for it taking too long even though it doesn't take too long is a classic like reverse gas lighting yeah that she is doing to like

make you realize that it's all tapping quite quickly and to like think of her better and be like she's actually doing a great job none of this is taking a long time I think I'm gonna steal that trick for the bedroom hey boy sorry about the delay sorry that took too long yeah you got other things to do today huh we we even had sex so the the tour of Italy I will say and I said this to you in the restaurant Mitch the lasagna classical I feel like if I'd had that as a nine-year-old boy that would be my favorite thing in the world I was like this is so like just like a classic generic Italian lasagna it's it's it reminded me a lot of what the lasagna they have at Murray calendars which is just like which is not necessarily a recommendation

something in favor of a place that's supposed to be Italian but I mean it is sort of like it's just a very classic basic American style lasagna and the fettuccine Alfredo was my favorite thing on the plate I thought the the the pasta was not overcooked and you know I think the afrelta sauce that can sometimes be just be so overpowering and it was like just you know like a little creamy and that they didn't put in too much of it chicken parmesan was fine it was just I feel like a little generic nothing nothing too impressive it was it was very fried I tried you we try to eat some of each other's meals oh no no you're you're right for those poor families that saw us feeding each other with our right

the and the chicken the tramping a chicken parm the chicken parm wasn't bad it just was like very much it was very fried yeah there's no fettuccine Alfredo was decent and then the the the lasagna and then the lasagna was you didn't like it that much so I did like the lasagna I like the fettuccine more but the lasagna I thought was was pretty good yeah I think the I think the fettuccine was the star and that the chicken parm was the was in third place in the bronze I liked my manicotti I thought I thought it was good once it cooled down they were like you know like the edges this is a place I got like what are the there's probably an exact word for it where the where the pasta edges are like

pinched you know what I'm talking about where like yeah like those sometimes those would be like very hard and not like it felt like they were overcooked or whatever if you know what that term is hashtag pinched edged pasta term hey nice hashtag uh but the rest of it was was the rest of the manicotti was good the meatball though there was just a there's a reason meatballs are the size they are right exactly and I would have liked it if it was just meatballs in manicotti honestly I would have been like okay that's that's fine but this there was just this giant fucking just this huge shitty meatball sitting on top of the manicotti so it kind of bummed me that's the problem with the olive garden is it it loves its gimmicks it loves it loves to find a little

gimmick like pasta chips or giant meatball yeah it's like anybody can go to an Italian restaurant and get meatballs in manicotti but a giant meatball yeah and it just it's a little limited time thing I should have gone with the bolognese which just seemed kind of like a more straightforward thing that maybe would have been bad too but at least the probably would have been cooked at a normal temperature right it would have been all right yeah mitch we we got a dessert too before we get into that at jolly want to hear a little bit about your meal to talk us through your most recent visit so I did I post mates all of garden myself like a like fucking richy rich I was like bring it to me because I don't go for the

ambience but although I do think I missed it a little bit I think I miss the decor has not changed in probably 20 years frozen in time I think if you worked at a restaurant you're you are you are fair to give a review on it yes no whenever yeah I have had everything on the menu circa 2011 probably at that time I have not had the pasta chips or the giant meatball I think I can probably guess as to what the giant meatball tasted like but I'm not good I got the best appetizer on our menu is the on our menu wow I really I really went back to that place I really felt like I was standing next to your table in a black apron just now I'm starting to think if there was a death at all of garden you would help I drank the Kool-aid no is the lasagna for

fritters oh yes you know I think we might the first visit we had with to all of guard I think I think we maybe had that sounds familiar yeah I think we might have those so good it's literally just the lasagna that you like cut into little pieces of deep fried I mean yeah how can you go wrong right it's so good love those and I got I ordered that and then I got my favorite meal on the menu that really brought me back which is the oh fuck up the braised beef and tortellini oh which is I think the best thing at all of garden now I feel even because the the it was a braised beef bolognese right that I didn't get so now I'm sad because that's it tastes it is the what it to me is the thing that tastes the most like something that is not made at a chain restaurant at that

place it is so good the the braised beef is like it doesn't have that like frozen meat quality even though I know none of it is fresh they're not they're slaughtering meat by any means but it's just oh it's so good and the sauce is I don't know what the sauce is that I I can't get it anywhere else it doesn't taste like anything else that I've had I mean I'm I am also a Midwest Rube too sure I'm sure that if I were to give it to someone with a better palate than my own they'd be like yeah that's this sauce that's you know you just have to order it here but it's so good my other favorite meal is the steak and gorgonzola oh wow all right yeah little steak medallions the reverse of the giant meatball was just three tiny little steak medallions yeah yeah I think better to make

things smaller at all of garden than bigger they should I oh my god I had such a terrible time with the postmates though I ordered it and I ordered it looked like on the postmates menu we had to you had to order a to-go salad because I really wanted the salad I fucking love we didn't talk about the salad I think the salad is fucking great I actually like that the salads are the salad is salad and breadsticks are for sure like you were saying there's just a moneymaker of this place yeah good that was it that was an oversight on our part not discussing our salad bitch yeah the the I we get we got a big bowl of salad we we just had the one bowl of salad but no with the two of us but it's still you know is it it's it's good I like the dressing a lot they throw some

fresh parmesan on there it doesn't and maybe I would think differently now because my my standards for how something is overdressed has changed drastically since I've moved out of the Midwest short I didn't ever feel like it was overdressed no it's not like it's not like stopping now yeah and it's just so good that salad dressing is is so good but so I ordered an extra one and then my postmates texted me and when they text no it's never good and I was like hey this is your driver I am at the restaurant right now do you want utensils and I was like yeah sure I'm pretty sure I specified that dude that's a that's a bullet dodge it feels like yeah and then he was like also your meal comes with a salad and you order another salad did you want two salads and I was

like no I didn't thank you for catching that he's like I'll take care of it for you and then he's like and I'll be he's like I'm gonna make sure to put them in two separate bags because I hate when I get a salad that's been sitting in warm food and I was like all right too much listen you weren't thirsting for this tip in a way that is now crossed a line like and he and I get it like I I wish he wasn't forced into doing this line of work because the way the world works you know no one should have to be a postmates driver and he doesn't know that I tip 20% no matter what you know like he I'm sure there are people who need this kind of overdue you know yeah I don't need to don't don't patronize me with your text messages like just do it just separate the salad from the

hot food you don't have to tell me about it I'll notice it and I'll tip you right but not everyone is like that so no for sure I think you can I think you can tell if you have a good postmates yeah well they I whenever they text me to be like to tell me some like innocuous thing that they've done and I'm always like yeah I get I'm gonna tip you don't worry it's fine you don't have to tell me just like I will tip you but so then he's we have this big long conversation and he's like okay I'm on my way and then like five minutes later I get the text message from postmates it's like some things happened to your order we had to cancel the restaurant oh no this is after 45 minutes already and I was like and I send it a customer service email that was sounded insane

because I was like yeah this happened and it was after 45 minutes and I had a full conversation with my driver I don't I need to know what happened and they sent me back that the like standard response where they're like we're sorry this happened here's five dollars and I was like no no no I like emailed back and I was like I don't want your money I want to know what happened to my food closure I it was on the way yes he seemed normal he separated it he put the salad in a separate bag I just need to know what happened to it and they're like we'll look into it and investigate it and make sure this doesn't happen again and I was like I don't care if it happens again I just want to know what it was like three separate emails and then they stopped emailing

back because they're like this is a crazy person like we've given him so much money and I was like truly didn't want anything but an explanation it's all I wanted so then I had to reorder again and it came no incident but you're so good this is exactly what I remember this is the thing that I was I didn't want to bring it up on the podcast but I had ordered postmates for the one we were doing the pizza tournament yes and he got into a car accident and it was a similar thing where I couldn't I try to get information and they they just wouldn't really so maybe they have a thing where they don't yeah I'm sure they can't well I will say in New York postmates most of them are on bikes yeah a lot of them are on bikes and I used to order postmates pop I get real stone and

ordered pop eyes hell yeah the best chicken chain like fast food in my opinion and I would get a dr pepper and almost every single time I would order I'd have to order it two or three times because I would get a driver on a bike and you can't you can't bike with a fountain drink it's tough it's so often it would happen and then sometimes like oh god I just would feel so bad for them because it'd be like something happened to your order oh my god it's so clear don't they just drop the fucking drink I'm sure I wonder how many times that happens in just with post I wonder how much money they burn on that's crazy they got to start getting their bike riders some drink caddies one time one time I did that exact thing and he was taking such a crazy long

time and I was like following his icon around the map and finally he got there and I was like it took him a lot it took like an hour and a half and he was like oh well because of the fountain drink I had to take the bus he took two buses to deliver to me because he was like yeah I just like didn't want to ride my bike and so he like roll he likes walked his bike onto a bus with my Popeyes and I felt I had never felt more guilty for like participating in Nick Nick Nick Nick doesn't use post I don't use postmates I think maybe I have to retire post do I have to retire completely I guess the thing is so this is the problem is I know I rarely use postmates in New York except for Popeyes which is the only thing I ever use postmates for because it's fast

food and you can't get it anywhere else anyway else and but like seamless and grow up is is really good in New York like most restaurants have it most restaurants in general in New York have delivery yeah like even nice ones and in LA the delivery game is not strong otherwise it's really hard to find delivery yeah it's it's confusing because you think it would be like New York you think there would be places also that are open late and there isn't a ton of places that are open late it's really strange to find pizza at 3 a.m. in this city is a nightmare it's it's hard it's very hard I know it's crazy yeah well let's uh let's get to our real quick midge let's let's let's discuss this black time moustache cake and then let's get to our final thoughts

so good I like that I like that a lot we ordered off the zios do they have the ziosk where you work there I find that the ziosk weird because there's times when the server themselves like is using the ziosk where I'm like kind of like I don't and and for people who don't know what the ziosk is it's like this tablet on a stand that's on every table that you can use to order appetizers you can use to pay your check which is a lot like in an airport it's a lot like an airport exactly and and you can use to order dessert and um and so we yeah we ordered off the ziosk this is a thing our server had to check in with us because they said like okay you she just she was like you ordered off the ziosk the dessert but it doesn't say what dessert you got it just says

ziosk dessert oh which I was like that's a flaw in their system that they need to patch out it was another thing too that the dessert came in saying it came so quickly but that's because none of them are made they're all just sitting they're just sitting there okay because I mean it was quite good I think it might have been this my favorite I say start of the meal yeah it was very good chocolate cake dark chocolate cheesecake and custard mousse and yeah I thought I thought that was quite delicious and they had some chocolate chips on the back end of it is kind of like a crust which were which were really nice I went to the bathroom I came back and you were talking to the ziosk we gotta hang out sometime buddy I thought you were gonna say you're talking to the cake

now that's a Mitch move well let's get let's get to our final thoughts on okay did you have something to say Mitch no no I just was gonna say start of the meal yeah well absolutely let's let's get to our final thoughts on olive garden so Joel will each go around and we'll sort of give a closing argument if you will and then ascribe this chain a rating on the order of zero to five forks okay you're a guest we will start with you great um listen I think it's really a testament to how good the food is that I worked there for two years had a terrible experience worked with a lot of heroin addicts and yet I still would eat there every day if I could I I think I actually have now they they have a lot of healthy options too you can make it work for

your diet I anybody can eat there when you're there your family I felt that I feel that you know I look they the people at all of garden at any all of garden are my chosen family and I'm gonna give it you guys don't do half works you can oh yeah yeah feel free I'm gonna give it four and a half four wow very good score that's a great I know and I know that I'm coming in hot with the the high score it's my first episode and like people will probably think that I give everything a high score and that's simply not the case I think some people I think this is a very divisive restaurant in some ways yeah and I gotta say sadly there's no place in my heart for oh wow that's my family yeah well I got a question for you when you're here family

my question is what family the Manson family Nick go ahead you can tell Mitch tried Mitch said tried that on me at the restaurant and then said and then they laughed and he said he was going to say it again on the podcast well what other family Nick the Adams family yeah that's another that's an all that's an all you had which also works I think that I ain't talking John Adams or John Quincy Adams no you didn't have to clarify I'm talking talking Gomez don't explain the joke because in it not only is he explaining the joke he's explaining the alt to a joke that he's already said what family said that the the Bundy family that can work with with both of them right with Al or with Ted yes I think Al it's a little less clear what you're talking what you mean

do you want one last one yeah what is it the Cosby family oh boy okay what that's another bad family yeah I mean I guess the family hasn't bad it's now I'm in trouble you're telling me it's weird shit it's weird that he had a practice in his basement in hindsight right very very strange yes every every element about that is very yeah but the the fictional reality it's like yeah he's a bad guy I shouldn't have brought him up bring down the the vibe in the room at the very end Charles Manson was fine but how dare you bring up Bill Cosby yeah look what is it the the freaking Manson family there you go the freaking Manson's run that place because the what they what they what they give you sometimes should be against the law

I say your fault that you ordered a fucking guy the meatball was cold too dense it tasted meat low-fee it was not good gets points for the the dessert was great I finished weigher had just a few bites I finished that thing because it was the most satisfying thing of all the Manicotti was pretty good look the money make when it comes to the meatballs I say take the rule of honey I shrunk the kids the original is good shrink things down okay don't blow them up yeah you know what I'm saying right I was about to be like trying to think of what the rule of that movie is but anyways I mean eating there I just wondered if it was the Manson family the third time it really lost its first two I was on board for because look the food it just the the salad and breadsticks

are where it's at that is that's what that's what people want out of that place and I get it and they're both good and they both do their thing and they're good just the entrees are not that great the cocktail was okay the dessert was great but man I I think you both got shitty entrees we did we did we did them and huge right it's hard for here's here's what I'm gonna say because a three four three fork rating is good and it's hard for me to give it three for I have a hard time giving it three forks that's like but I also feel I've also feel like it's not a two and a half fork place right so I'm gonna give it two point nine forks okay wow just shy of three just shy of three you know what two point eight five that's that I think that is I think that's it exactly

okay I think that is it you're suggesting that degree of decimal accuracy to the hundredth of a percentage two point eight five four hundreds of a point uh yeah yeah two point eight five fours it just it's it's all right but right like I said what is it the Manson family yeah no yeah now it's I'm starting to come back around I like it I'm sort of full circle with it it was too much and now it's great I'll have garden look we we've we've already touched on the versions of the slogan when you hear your family it's now currently we're all family yeah with the frigging man it's been it's been it's been changed to we're all family here and Mitch you might speculate speculate I assume the Manson

family probably the Manson yeah okay which isn't a real brother and sister type family it's a bunch of sex weird yes that feels less and where we're all family here feels less inviting than when you're here your family it really does it doesn't feel there is no implicit suggestion that when you go to the restaurant right you are now a part of the family right it's like we're all family here yeah it's it's it's like one of those things where it's like the they've they've read the elements of style they've reduced the number of words but they've made it less it doesn't feel inclusive it's good but family here get the fuck out but but to me like what that brings me to is this is a restaurant for families and I think you know part of the

the mission statement of this podcast is to evaluate to evaluate these chains on their own terms and what they're trying to accomplish and I feel like if you are there were a lot of families eating there if you are a family if you are a family and you have you have teenagers to feed you know on a budget you can fill them up on the salad and breadsticks I feel like it's not real Italian food obviously it doesn't try to be real Italian food it's this it's this intentionally generic Italian-American version of these dishes that is going to be crowd-pleasing and you know if I if someone recommended me the like a bistro and I went to it and I got what I got at the Olive Garden I'd be like I'm not going back to this place but it being the Olive

Garden and me knowing what it is and wanting it's what it's trying to accomplish this is the definition of a three fork restaurant it just does exactly what it's trying to do it it provides mainstream Italian fare for families and for mainstream for mainstream consumption and I think it succeeds at it I like the atmosphere I like the I like the service I like how cheesy it is I like how it kind of is like it's basically analogous to medieval times but for an Italian restaurant it's like a theme restaurant basically what by the way why when you notice like you saying man's if I was do you continue saying families 10 more times I was going to go you went to saying that pray that family praying next really touched Nick really

Nick's experience of the restaurant I really think that's what bumped it up to a three four was seeing that family pray in Trump's America I'll say this I'll say this too after yes almost six years of living in New York the food the Italian food at Olive Garden is worlds better than there are some Italian restaurants like in the Lower East Side that are bigger that aren't that like anyone who lives in New York knows that they're not good restaurants right but they're like near like the Lower East Side and they're like the theater district and stuff like that and people go and eat there and they have like books of things but they are maybe on the surface more authentic seeming because they're owned by like Italian people in

New York City and they're not a chain but the it's just like a glob of greasy pasta on a plate yeah and and I think I'll I would rather go to an Olive Garden than a new cheese or you know an Italian last name that is you know right New York I will also say you just made a good point about like the the breadsticks and the salad it like it is just like you were saying it's not Italian it's like how Taco Bell isn't really Mexican food sure it just checks this this box and I appreciate that I get that because that's like Domino's pizza isn't the same thing as pizza or you know there's there there's isn't it though I mean it it is and it also won our pizza turn like fucking love Domino's but and then other times like you you're craving like I love Domino's

too and I and I think that people like you can get whatever you want from that place but then also like if I'm back in Quincy or something there's I if I want a pizza I'm not going to get Domino's yeah and I'm not going to get any chain pizza probably yeah well that was a three forks three forks for me well that was our view of Olive Garden it's time for a regular segment we have a fast food item that we bought yesterday and we're going to see how it held up after spending a night in the fridge these are the leftovers I can't wait to see Carrie Coon in an infinity war so Mitch as we hear the leftover season one theme which we never updated we've never updated uh shows now off the air had a different theme song for its subsequent seasons

I don't think the vibe would be right yeah I don't think so either yeah great but Mitch Mitch talk us through what do we have for the leftovers which we just did on our most recent episode but there's a reason we're doing it again the reason we did it was that we were at Olive Garden last night and they said to us you know when you order a meal here you can do another six well these things that were we will pack you another meal to go a six dollar meal saying yeah insane that we cool down for so for just six dollars you can get another full meal we got ourselves some bologna what was it classic spaghetti and spaghetti oh spaghetti and meatballs yeah that's as my understanding might be a spaghetti bolognese but I thought it was a bolognese but we we decided

we didn't have a segment for today we're gonna do Olive Garden again yes it is oh it is spaghetti bolognese a spaghetti with meat sauce okay that's what it is this I've eaten this cold so many times throughout my life well we're gonna see how this holds up so these are just did they have this when you work there Joel this this no but it is crazy like how can they make it more like cheaper it's just saying that like they're trying already you have something that's unlimited yeah well you know sometimes we heat stuff up on here I don't think we should no I don't think so but it does say refrigerate immediately which I mean I drove home it took about a half an hour to 45 that's fine for best experience following suggestions below heat and microwave for

three to four minutes allow to stand for one minute transfer pasta to the plate honestly three to four minutes seems like a long time that's a long yeah look we're not gonna do that I'll let you guys get in there first I'll Joel actually we'll let you you you can do the honors of trying this well I feel like Italian food is one of those things that should be good cold like I like a good cold pasta I gotta say I have high expectations for this I think it should be good now I don't I don't love their spaghetti I think it's too thick personally I like I prefer an angel hair that's just in general I'm not just saying that about right it does look it does it looks cold I will say yeah you can apply the eye test to this say this thing that's been sitting in your fridge for a

while does look cold Joel how are you and you can you can hand that over to unless you want to try another bite no let me take a bite of this bad boy I forgot how good the bolognese there is because oh wow you can taste the Italian sausage really clearly yeah they kind of we talked about this didn't we oh no I mean this might have been I may I may be putting this to another restaurant didn't we say it was kind of sausage heavy over there Nick or was this was this today's restaurant I like it I think you were talking about your diet in general Mitch fair enough I think I think I think I think you're right I think I think there is kind of like a an emphasis on yeah that is a good bolognese and I think like if I just if I just ate if I had that

leftover in the fridge and I was hung over I would like I though I'd be like this is great this is so satisfying to you right now Mitch has taken a bite it kind of like to me that kind of reminds me of because my dad would make spaghetti and he just makes straight up spaghetti and meat sauce and you know not to not to compare dad's home cooking to the olive garden but uh mr engineer is taking a bite right now Mitch just took a bite but it does kind of remind me of my dad's spaghetti when you just said that I didn't realize how right you were of how sausage for it's very it's very sausagey yeah yeah my dad would use ground beef like yeah but that's the thing is I think ground beef is so bland yeah the sausage is nice it gives it a nice

character to it I mean like for me this is what I always forget our system we just did this and I forgot our system either we leave it leaving it behind or you take it up to heaven right this one goes up to heaven this this this this I think this does go up to have this one's going up to heaven and hey it's riffing with jimmy Hendricks on guitar oh Stephen Hawking on drums hell yeah Barbara Bush on bass fern treuer on vocals on vocals or maybe just to a different dimension oh that that's a possibility is this is this is also a leftovers thing oh my did you not want we haven't seen the show we would to be fair we haven't seen a second of it wow okay rest in peace to barbara bush and fern treuer as well rest in peace to fern yeah i'll just go with

vert you don't want to say rest in peace to barbara now i'm good now what the hell i'm good i'm not gonna say i'm not gonna say anything else about it was she evil in some ways read a book joel what do you think you do you take this up to definitely take this up to have yeah definitely it's not it's not anything special but i do think the the the fennel forward sausage really does push it over the i want to say that it's almost too much for me like i i i but i was raised on more kind of meaty bolognese instead of sausagey it's better than ragu it's i think oh yeah no this is this is this is going up to heaven and you know what i'm not gonna fucking share it with barbara bush there you go i'm gonna be reading a book not about barbara bush about

bolognese oh boy emma you like emma thumbs up thumbs up from my my engineer as well great uh that was the leftovers just like a rest what so is that for two cheese is closing i know wait what's for two cheese it's i think is the better probably the new england all of it's the new england all of which i think is better than all of gar no offense and what they do instead of brent instead of the breadsticks uh did you start just start playing no doubt i accidentally started playing no doubt i thought i had my computer mood it muted and this is a new it's a new segment no doubt about it for two cheese is closing i apologize you really are so cal boy um it's no doubt and whatever uh

burtucci's they had they would do like a little doughy like they would just have like doughy bread like dinner rolls that were like very doughy that were right there that sounds like it was made incorrectly it there so they were they were so they were so good and then they also have big salads like table salads were they unlimited not eaten off the table table freak uh they it was they were they were all they were all in the middle okay well yep it was good and i think it's it's going to close soon nick because i'm going to be in baston soon i would love please please i i mean this sincerely we will we'll pay for your trip to burtucci's i was going to say my trip to boss we'll see a couple more patreon episode no way after you put down barbara bush no way

but you you should track also pizzeria regina is where you should i will maybe i'll dm you when i go please i'm doing it with boston's in may and i really want to go to the regina yes 100 on thatcher street can't backers street i forget how to say it but uh in the north end that's the one you gotta go hey you know what just like a restaurant we value your feedback let's open up the feedback and we have a voicemail today let's take a listen oh boy no boys this is zack all the way from louisville kentucky woke up this morning and i got two questions first question when you're in a rush to get out the door for work this morning like i was what's your favorite thing to grab on the go

in my second question when i got in the car i found a dumb dumb lollipop uh in my center console so my second question what is your all's favorite dumb dumb lollipop flavor that's a cute that's gonna be it for the day spoon nation hell yeah wow thanks zack uh what do you what do you think joel any any grab and go items uh i have a very regimented diet and i never get enough protein i have um these uh feed bars i think they're okay like jerky bars that i really like um and actually still a pop tart guy oh okay that source of carbs right um i like a pop tart still yeah just an untoasted pop tart is something i'll grab and do you have any dumb dumb favoritism uh i love a watermelon dumb dumb and i love a blue raspberry dumb oh and i love the green apple too those things

are fucking great i don't think they ever go bad either yeah i think those are those are those are immortal i you know i had forgotten the green apple and then when you said yeah i think so they will not die uh they won't ever join a jam band in heaven i think i had forgotten about the green apple and when you said it i was like oh i think when i was a kid because i have not had one of those in 20 years but i think when i was a kid i think those green apples were the were the way to go for me i think that might i'll steal that answer um as far as grab and go peanut butter sandwich is my current go to or or you know sometimes if i'm just gonna eat something quickly i'll have like a peanut butter banana but if i'm gonna take something that i gotta eat with

like eight as i'm on the run i will have some sort of sandwich and things a little bit more contained but you know for a while and i look back on this kind of with revulsion at myself i used to just take loose lunch meat no that's totally legit how about i would just like have loose lunch meat in my hand and like have that as a meal i feel weird about it i think that's fine and i think that more and more so answers his question because the other things you that requires at least minimal effort but still effort it's not grab and go you can grab a lunch meat out of the fridge and just open it up in your car and it might seem gross but i think that's totally fine okay good i'm glad i don't think you're gross at all thank you joel mitcha

and answers i think you're gross uh i i so i'm looking i'm looking over dumbed i'm just like looking at images of dumdums and that's unreal you don't hear a question the question right that's just unrelated um i just left up on his phone from last night i like this i like the watermelon dot and dumb dumb i like strawberry and cherry and also grape i think i i mean i'm i'm naming a lot yeah but the water i feel like watermelon when your kid was like that that was like the big well that's because candied watermelon flavored candy doesn't taste like watermelon it is it's our flavor it's its own flavor yeah i like i said that i like artificial strawberry flavor more than strawberry and people got mad at me on the podcast they're like you like it more than

actual strawberries yeah i fucking do i like it better all right it tastes better than strawberries are good i like spread i'd prefer fresh strawberry i think it's a weird hill to die nerd of course you like it more than you like syrup there i like that i get that there's some flavors that are better than the real fruit but but strawberries are delicious a good strawberry i just don't feel like you get good strawberries that much i don't know right yeah i mean that's why they're worth it never mind i don't want to have this fight right now we're almost done yeah we can't it's fine if we're almost done um uh for the first question i hate to go food i eating breakfast in the morning before school always used to get me sick like i'd feel sick during the day like uh

and and like the sugar rush like if i ate a pop tart or even toaster strudel i want more toaster strudel and pop right who wouldn't want it yeah it's better except it does take a it does take a little bit more time and then you can get the the you can get the white cream cheese yeah you can get the creamy cheese on yourself and stuff that can be a disaster uh i would i would try to do a bagel and cream cheese but if it is like a true rush which is that you can't do a bagel and cream cheese you can't even toast anything i guess like a cold pop pop tart but i before that i would just do like a like not a power bar but like a like an oatmeal bar with like either raisins or chocolate chips in it or something like that i think that's my answer hey let us know your favorite uh hashtag

grab and go and hashtag dumb dumb smarts and hey if you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants you can email us at doughboyspodcasts at gmail.com or leave us a voicemail at 830 go dough that's 830 463 6844 to get the doughboys double our weekly bonus episode join the gong play club at patreon.com slash do i just want to quickly say that i feel like we're going to get roasted for both of those answers there's something that we're missing yeah well that's why we have the hashtags yeah all right rosas and the hashtags joel kim booster thank you so much for giving us so much of your valuable time do you have anything you would like to plug it this time um um uh when does this come out this will be out the first week of may

yes may 3rd may the 4th eve may the 4th be with you may the 4th be with you as well mic i feel like i have dates somewhere in may unkar plot is coming down the chimney ready to put a quarter portion under the tree oh if you're in north carolina i'm headlining the dead crow comedy theater in wilmington north carolina on the eight the weekend of the 18th uh i think i'll be there like the 17 18th and 19th it's one of my favorite comedy clubs in the country hell yeah all right and check that out yeah and i'll do for this episode of doughboys until next time for the spoon man mike mitchell i'm nick weiger happy eatin see ya hey guys you want more doughboys to get the doughboys double our weekly bonus episode join the golden plate club sign up at patreon.com slash

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