Doughboys - Oops! All Segments! 2!

Episode Date: July 4, 2024

It's the return of Oops! All Segments! Toni Charline Ramos, Tim Heidecker, Jesse Farrar & Mike Hale, Jackie Johnson, Payman Benz, Sierra Katow, and John Hodgman join the 'boys to participate in a variety of segments.Watch this episode at youtube.com/doughboysmediaGet ad-free episodes at patreon.com/doughboysGet Doughboys merch at kinshipgoods.com/doughboysAdvertise on Doughboys via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. Want to watch this episode? Check it out on our YouTube channel by going to youtube.com slash doughboysmedia. Double over Doughboy! So it's the Doughboyz! Double over Doughboyz! Double over Doughboyz! Double over Doughboyz! Double over Doughboyz! Hey buddy, it's the Doughboyz! Happy July 4th to all of you in the United States of America.

And reminder, America is bad. Not to me it's not. It's the greatest country in the world. Although it has done some bad stuff. Yeah, it's not. It's the greatest country in the world, although it has done some bad stuff. Yeah, it's true. So when you're celebrating, shooting off your fireworks, grilling up a dog or a burg, having some potato salad with your friends and loved ones,

remember, America's crimes. Yes. When the fireworks are going off, each firework represents a crime that America has committed. Each firework scares Jemmy more and more. So remember that too, that's a crime in and of itself, scaring beautiful dogs like Jemmy, who is staring at me narrow-eyed right now from the carpet. Wags, much like a fireworks display, you like when you get to see all sorts of different fireworks.

There's, hey, look at this one. That one is a sizzler. Yes. And that one is a big flower one. Well, that's what we got here for you today. That's right. It's another oops, all segments. This episode is all segments. So you're going to be like, boom, snack or whack, bing, drink or stink, boom, pie in the sky, all the way through the duration of this episode with some of our favorite guests throughout the Doughboys canon. Pfft, koalik. Baa, pfft, koalik.

Koalik might show up twice, who knows? So like a little sparkler, what's this? Oh, it's koalik. There's gonna be a lot of koalik in this episode's this? Oh, it's Koalik. There's gonna be a lot of Koalik in this episode. Basically balls to the walls Koalik. So if you love K-Wall, we know you do. We know you love K-Wall.

By the way, Koalik just told me the other day, he was like out in a park and some guy was like, the Noid. And he called him the Noid. He told me this, he got recognized as the Noid. He got recognized as the Noid. He said the person didn't know his real name. But you know what?

Yeah. You might hear from The Noid, who knows? Koala might be one of these Ubisoft segments. He was like, I loved it. Yeah, he liked it. Yeah. Also, to keep you listening, just to let you know, no Koala appears.

There's zero Koala in this episode. So keep listening, you're gonna like it. And one last thing, America is bad. It's bad. So enjoy this week's Oops All segments, a whole bunch of segments strung together, one after another, a big old compilation, like you might watch on a porno website,

and except this one is laughs instead of jizz shots. Instead of jizz shots. And you know what, when I said America is bad, I meant like Michael Jackson bad. Hee hee. Hee hee. Enjoy the episode. We're starting things off hot.

We caliente. Literally with a hot guest, Tony Charlene Ramos. Hi Tony. Hi, what a delight guest, Tony Charlene Ramos. Hi, Tony. Hi. What a delight. Great to have you here, as always. We brought us the Hot Ones Challenge. I did.

The first WeFeast presents Hot Ones Bites. People have wanted us to be doing this, so guess what? Now you got it. On an oops, all seven. Careful, because that is open. I just thought you were right. Oh, I didn't see the bottom was open. Flash tag tag stay spicy

nice Tony how did you come to acquire this bad boy not a bad? Well, I bought it for me and my boyfriend and a friend did it oh, okay, so you've already had these yeah But you can reimburse me Yes, so I I have Done it. Yeah, but you can reimburse me. Yeah. Yes, so I have done it. I wanted to do it, and then a friend, Dave Tooney, did it, and I was like, oh, yeah. And so I got it. And it was a delight.

I don't want to give anything away or say anything. We would reimburse you, but we noticed that they've all been opened. So you will not be receiving any reimbursement from Go Boys Media LLC. Reimbursement rescinded. I'll also say this. They have not, it was probably a couple weeks ago that I opened them and they haven't been in the fridge and it does say it's refrigerated.

They got vinegar in them, right? They're fine. Yeah. Okay. So here's the lineup and they go from... But I will use that as an excuse for if it gets too spicy. Oh, it's just been not refrigerated? Oh, dear.

They go from merely just kinda hot to insanely hot. We know the Scoville Heat Unit system for measuring the intensity of pepperiness. This first one is Hot Ones Buffalo Hot Sauce, which starts at 1,800 Scoville heat units. We work our way up to Hot Ones The Last Dab Experience, which is a staggering 2.6 million Scoville units. An order of magnitude larger.

That's too many Scovilles, Wags. It's like a megaton bomb versus TNT. The hottest pepper in the world right now is the Pepper X, which comes in just at 2.7 million Scovilles. It's just a tiny bit hotter than that hot sauce. Awesome. Pepper X. Where do you think... I'm like a spicy X-Man.

I'm Pepper X. I'm sizzling. To me, it sounds like that X-rated Peppa Pig video I've been looking for. Oh my God. My God, Mitch. Eight titties? Eight. Those pigs have a lot.

Straighten out that curly tail. Oh my God. Six titties? You know what? That's not the weirdest part. Tell us how many titties. my God. Six titties? You know what, that's not the weirdest part. Yeah. Tell us how many titties. Hashtag pig titties.

Hashtag pig titties. Don't be afraid of pictures. Is it the same as dogs? Cause we got Jemmy right here. I don't wanna subject Jemmy to an anatomical examination, but Jemmy might have an answer. Roll her over. She's got a tattoo on her belly.

That's true. She's a tatted on her belly. That's true. She's a tatted babe. Nice. I think it's six. It might be eight. It might be six. Oh, nipples? She's got eight.

She's got eight, so maybe it is eight on the pig. You're probably right. Okay, this man knows his fucking pig titties. I know my fucking nipples. Give me an animal, I'll tell you how many nipples they got. Okay, let's get into this. I got nipples, can you milk me? Please.

Bobby D. Bobby D. I got nipples Greg, that's the full line. Greg Fokker. People omit the Greg because it makes it too specific. It's easier if you're saying it again to just not add that in there. It's like changing no I am your father to Luke I am your

father to make the line a little bit more clear. not add that in there. It's like changing, no, I am your father, to Luke, I am your father, to make the line a little bit more clear. You talking to me and I got nipples, can you milk me? What do you think is the better, the bigger, the more well-known line of the two? More well-known line as of now? Probably I got nipples. I think honestly that movie was a big hit

and it's more recent. And I think a lot of younger people have never seen, you know, Taxi Driver. That's true. I saw... But then you talking to me is so in the zeitgeist of, like, cinema that maybe it is still you talking to me just based off a legacy.

It might be, yeah. Yeah, they might probably know what it is, but not where it's from. They don't understand the context, yeah. What would be third for De Niro? Can you think of one? I mean, this is very boring. I apologize. I know there's a good way to start the context. Yeah, what would be third for for dinero? Can you think of one? I mean, this is very boring I mean I know there's a good way start the episode yeah, I

Think third would be I've got nipples Greg again Yeah Or it would be this That one that's good. That's a good one. Yeah. Yeah, how be this. That one, that one's good. That's huge. That's a good one. That's big. How about, I'm a bad grandpa.

That's big. Nice. Isn't there one that's, and you blew it. Isn't that a? They had a Copland. Copland. And you blew it. And you blew it.

And you blew it. And you blew it. And you blew it. And you blew it. And you blew it. And you blew it. We got the movie guy. We got the movie guy on the ones and twos over there.

We got the movie guy. But we also got Tony here and we got some hot sauces. We got to taste these sons of bitches. All right, first up, hot ones, Buffalo hot sauce. Do you have all of these? Do you have a favorite? I have. This is one of my favorites. It's the beginning. This first one, the baseline. Oh, this is a bad sign that your favorite one is the first one.

We are using- Well, it's a matter of like, taste though. Right. It's not necessarily, it's like, this obviously is the spiciest, but yeah. We are using Miss Vicky's sea salt chips is like kind of a baseline neutral Tasting it's what we had in the kitchen. We had in the kitchen you got just I thought you were gonna get three plates There's just one there. Do you want some more plates? I can get some more plates. Yeah, get the fuck out of here We'll get some more points. Oh, okay. I was gonna get plates. Thank you. I'm

Mess with people's hearing all this I had me so phony and Tony was crinkling the chips and it was her I think she should be banned from the podcast No! Casey's back! Cop! Let me work! Mr. Copland himself! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I feel like it's the most real thing Casey's ever said to me. Just let me work, you damn fool. Trying to work.

Bring me into your... Wow. Yeah, we got, Wags got the little kid plate. Okay, let's see. Now, this does not have a... This nozzle, you can just pour out. Wow, yeah, it doesn't have a stopper. So you can be a little judicious with this. Let me go. Okay. You can be a little judicious with this. Let me go. Okay.

You went very light. Sort of gave a little. A cowardice pour, if you will. Yeah, I said cowardice pour. Oh! Whoa! Okay, that, I now see where you're coming from. Yeah, you kind of Peter Northed it all over that chip. All right, let me take a little.

I went maybe in between the two of you. A little bit here. Oh no. I mean, that's really flavorful. Okay. Oh no. I mean, that's really flavorful. I really like that. And got a little bit of burn to it. Emma, Jemmy has never had spicy, I assume. No, and I don't think she should.

I absolutely am not gonna subject her to spicy. I was just curious. But she definitely seems interested. I wonder if it's like got a strong smell and that's what interests her. That would make sense. I'm gonna move this calf out of snout reach. I'm gonna say this,

not without heat even on the first one. No, that's the kind of thing of like, if you're at all skittish about spice, then just be forewarned with this box. All right, next up. I'm just dipping my finger in and trying it that way. This is Sam's House's Smokey. Now Smokey also does not have a stopper

and basically triples the intensity. This goes from 1800 Scovilles to 6000 Scovilles. Interesting. So this is supposed to be three times as hot as what we previously had. I again, I'm going to give myself a little dab on the plate. Who's the person who has the famous cough on hot ones, Idris Elba?

Elba did cough, yeah. He did. Is that what happens? Sorry, this is dribbling a little bit. Let me pause this for a second. I wonder if any of us will do the Elba cough, Wags. I think it's totally possible. I'm prone to coughing. What I'm more prone to, and Tony,

I'm curious about you as a fellow heat seeker, I love it, but my nose gets so runny. Yeah, yeah. Like big time, like just like. Absolutely, it'll be real gross. Yes. Real fast, but I do love it. Yeah. It'll it'll be about real gross. Yes. Real fast. But I but I do love it. Yeah. Yeah. Here we go.

I'm trying Smokey's jalapeno hot sauce. I just I was going to make I was going to say something and said not to say it. OK, well, you now have to say it. I was going to say, do you think it's Smokey from Friday? And then I was like, that's not worth saying. I don't have any place to go with that. How can you think it's smoky from Friday? And then I was like, that's not worth saying. I don't have any place to go with that.

How can you think it's not worth saying on this podcast? It's maybe the best thing that's been said all day. Well, I didn't say it, so it doesn't count. Oh, I like that a lot. Yeah, it's got a great smoky taste to it. Smoky Verde, that's a great combination. Wow, I love that one. Yeah, that's very good.

It's a good one too. Honestly, the flavor of it makes me think even the last one is more spicy. Yeah. Right, it's the weirdness of, and it's like, you know, this is a jalapeno, so I guess it's technically a spicier pepper, but this one feels a little bit less intense than the previous sauce.

I could probably take a little bit more of it. All right, next up we got Funky's hot sauce. Funky's? Funky Kong? I was gonna, I was like, I'm not gonna say it. I'm not gonna say it's Funky Kong's, but you went ahead and said it is Funky Kong's. Funky's? Funky Kong? I was gonna, I was like, I'm not gonna say it. I'm not gonna say it's Funky Kongs, but you went ahead and said it is Funky Kongs. Funky's hot sauce. Yeah, I did.

You should've said it. I should've said it, yeah. I shouldn't have second guessed myself. I'm in my head now. Stellar Fuzz, this is a garlic habanero sauce. And this one is up to 19,000 Scovilles. So we're just rocketing up the charts here. I'd say like-

This definitely has that habanero color to it. If you're a heat seeker right now, you're fine. I think this is, you're not- Yeah, 100%. I'm not feeling much. After two, which if you've ever watched Hot Ones, they don't ever have an issue with two. Sure. But I'm wondering where you'll actually get the kick.

Unlike you with Dune. Dune is, I gave it like a two and a half, three. It's not bad. Okay. Jeez. And you had a bit of an issue with two. I've had, I've had this approach is Abanero sauce a lot. And where it's where it's Abanero you can get that abanero character, but it's really muted.

I do like the garlic that this has. Mm-hmm. Good garlic. A little spicy. It's a little spicy, but like, this is one of those ones where like, I just don't, I don't love the totality of flavors here. Like I appreciate, I know that this is for some people, but for me, it's like,

like it says garlic, ginger, zing with abaneros. I think just the abaneros. I think just the abanero is kind of dominating this. I don't know, overall doesn't quite come together with me. I gotta give hot ones credit for, like I said, the first one maybe seemed a little more spicy than the second one, but it is ramping for sure. Like you're ramping into this a little bit.

Yeah. Like there's, my tongue feels heat. Oh yeah. But it's not uncomfortable. How are there's, my tongue feels heat. Oh yeah. But it's not uncomfortable. How are you feeling, Wags? I'm feeling good. Yeah, I'm feeling good. I'm having a great time.

Los Calientes Verde is the next one. This is a Hot Ones branded sauce. This one is up to 36,000, so we were doubling in the intensity again. Ugh, my doctor told me not to eat. You can tap out, just tap out. My doctor told me not to go too crazy on Scoville, so I just, this is like...

For real? I was like, what a weird specific thing, your doctor. I'm just trying to have an excuse for when I tap out. This one so sort of has a, again, kind of a pinkish quality to it, a pink orange. Like a greenish. I guess it's a little greenish too, yeah. Uh oh. Uh oh, this is where we find out. You a greenish. I guess it's a little greenish too, yeah. Uh oh.

Uh oh, this is where we find out. He don't know. I should go ask that doctor. This is definitely not pinkish. Yeah. Maybe it just looked that way on my blue plate. 100% not. Oh, blue plus green, pink, you've seen.

Oh, I like this a lot. A chunk of something came out of mine. Okay, here we go. A hot one chunk? So this is a tomatillo, apricot, and cumin blend. This is delightful. I think this is a really nice little sweet. Dude, double check.

Make sure there's an IN on the end of that. Oh no, Mitch, I added an IN by mistake. There's crim in this, dude. Yeah, there is, dude. Dude, I can't believe N by mistake. There's cream in this dude. There is dude. Dude I can't believe you ate that. It's pretty good. It's pretty good. Yeah that's nice.

You know what there's more where that came from. The last dab. Alright next up, queso sin queso. See that's another interesting one where I'm like, when I dip my finger in it, which I probably shouldn't do with the later ones. No don't dip your finger Mitch. All right, next up, queso sin queso. See, that's another interesting one where I'm like, when I dip my finger in it, which I probably shouldn't do with the later ones. No, don't dip your finger, Mitch.

You're gonna have a burny finger. Well, don't touch your face. Okay. Okay, there is heat on it afterwards. Yeah, that one's got a little bit of an afterburn. It's nice. It is nice. It's like easier to take than some of the other ones.

So we're at five now. We're up to five. This is number five. This is good heat. This is queso sin queso. And this is a plant-based sauce. This is a queso-style plant-based. It's starting to smell like spicy peppers over here.

Oh, yeah. Is it bugging your eyes? No, no. I just noticed, like, the smell. Yeah, it's slowly making its way. Doubling these will. I am slightly nervous about doubling these. This one is up to 52,000, so it's not quite doubled,

but it certainly increased. I mean, I'm saying like, yeah, and to the hot one, it's not even doubling. It's like timesing by like 100,000. Emma, Casey, remind us where you are with spicy. I love spicy things. You love spicy. Yeah, but I like, I was just saying this earlier,

I like it better when it's a good flavored spice. If it's just spice for spice, I'm not really having a good time. I still wanna taste things. 100%. That's about where I'm at also. This is a- I don't like the sauce. This is a bright orange, correct? Mm-hmm.

So this is orange. I don't like this sauce and it is pretty spicy. I admire what they're doing. It's a little bit, sure. I admire what they're doing and trying to replicate a queso flavor without queso. Not bad. But yeah, this would not be an everyday sauce for me.

And this one does have some good burn to it. It's got burn. Yeah. I just like, you know when you feel it on your throat, like are you like, I just felt it on my throat. It's spicy, but I'm like, not too bad so far. Mitch, how do you feel about Blue Oyster Cult? I love them.

You do, so you don't fear the Reaper because that's what's up next. Bourbon Maple Reaper. Wow. I am a little nervous because this is, isn't this a notorious hot one sauce? Is it? Maybe not.

Maybe I'm just thinking of the band, Don't Fear the Reaper and of the Will Ferrell sketch. I'm handing this over. This one has a, is kind of like a tamarind sauce color. It's like a deep red slash purple. Why, you tasted it already? No, I have not yet. This is a slow building heat from Carolina Reaper Peppers.

We'll have you salivating, and this is 70 through 3000 scalville units. So this is twice as hot as the one from two spices. Guys, when you try this, you gotta tell me more or less cowbell. How's that for a dab? Okay. That's a good dab. Is this like whatever, is this the level you're doing?

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I'm not going nuts here, because I'm also trying to pace myself, even though I'm a bit of a heat seeker. Also trying to keep it off my fingers. This one's got good taste. Oh, fuck. I just got on my thigh. Oh, I like that. And you know what? It does have heat. Mm hmm. That is some real heat. Um, I'm sure I'll fill it more in a second here. The first the like the last one, the caseeso one and this one would be ones where like

if they were on a table at a restaurant trying to be like, oh those are pretty spicy. Right. The other ones are like, oh they got some spice to it but they taste good. We're not doing a good hot ones job are we? The hot one you're supposed to be going like, oh oh oh my heavens to Betsy. Heavens to Betsy. Who's the celebrity on for that? It's so hot. Oh, it's so hot. We can do that. We're only at six.

Yeah, OK. 7, 8, 9, 10 are going to be horrible. Should we be sweating a little bit more? And we should ask each other personal questions. Is that what they do? Oh, you're right. You're right. Yeah.

Tony, what was your high school mascot? Actually, I should know your high school mascot and say, so Tony, how do you feel about the Cavaliers? Oh. But I don't know what it is. What is it? Yeah. Bear.

You know what? So Tony, how do you feel about the Bears? A Bruin. Tony, how do you feel about the Bruins? The basketball team? Isn't there the Bruins? I think you have the moment where you're like, oh, how did you know that? Oh, okay.

Yeah, yeah. How did you know that? Oh, OK. Yeah, yeah. How did you know that? Answer the question. Look, all I'm going to say is that the first time I started to sweat is when you brought up high school mascots. Got nervous about you asking me that question. Why? What's one of the high school Red Raiders?

Oh. It's been retconned to be less problematic. What's sitting on the top there? You going mix that up is there is there oh is this the label no this is this is last just the label is the next one this is the forbidden fruit thank you for handing this back all right I've gotten I got my first little bit of nose run it just I got a little bit of nose run yeah not bad a little bit of nose pre-cum if you will. Oh my god. Before you blow it.

Oh fuck baby, I got a little bit of nose pre-cum. Oh! That feels so good. Don't sneeze on my tits! Not on my tits and not in my hair! Don't sneeze on my tits. Hold on, just wait right there. I'm going to get you a towel.

Sorry, I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Sorry, thank you. Thank you, sorry. Thank you, sorry. First one, sorry. Thank you.

This sounds pretty realistic. This is the forbidden fruit. This is at 124,000, so we are doubling the last one effectively. They're not quite there. Apple was the actual forbidden fruit in the Bible. I don't believe it was a pomegranate. Wow. Oh, interesting.

Okay, I just got schooled. This is La Pimenteri, this is forbidden fruit. A woman schooled me? From season 21. Julianne is back with a super pepper. Okay, so this one is from the show. This is a super pepper forward sauce. It's been a year in the making.

And it's supposed to be just... I don't have any more context beyond this being pretty fermented and pretty spicy. That's what they say. It's from season 21. What's your favorite fruit? Pineapple. Wow. That's a good answer. You know what they say. It's from season 21. What's your favorite fruit? Pineapple. Wow. That's a good answer.

You know what they say about it. When you. This is better. That is just bullshit, right? It is. I think that I think it's bullshit. So, I mean, that's I mean, that's a Patreon episode, so you find out. This is so, okay.

I'm a little nervous about one just for the look of it. It just looks hot. It's bright red. And I'm feeling it right away. Oh no. Oh yeah. Yeah, this one's really, this one's pretty hot. This immediately is so pepper-forward.

Yeah. And this one is pretty much just like straight burn. Like I'm really feeling it, but it's good. I like this. I would have this in certain contexts. You got the first elbow. I got the first elbow. That is, that's spicy.

That was on a table. Back to the throat. Yeah. I luckily got mine to like the cheek. Yeah. My right cheek. Yeah. I had another book. I have like a bunch of other food stashed in there. All right, the bomb evolution. Sorry, keep on. That one. If that was on a table, I would like warn my mom

and sister like, oh, I just got, I got like the explosion of like heat. Yeah. I would warn my mom and sister to not eat it. Yeah. I would be like, don't touch that. This is, is this, what is this? This is the bomb evolution. This is eight?

This is, this is number eight and there's 135,000. So a little bit of an elevation from the previous one, escalation. So the bomb, I feel like is one of their famous ones, right? I don't know. Maybe I just don't know. Yes, the bomb beyond insanity, I think, is the one they use,

but this is an all natural version of that. Nice. There you go. Yeah. That's the evolution. All right. Last one for sure is the spiciest one. Yeah, sure.

I would- I'd say that that's like a step. That last one to me is like, oh, this is like a step into like a new level of spiciness. 100%. That's the- Because I'm like, I wanna take a sip of of spiciness. 100%. That's a- Because I'm like, I wanna take a sip of my milk, but I'm trying not to, to just avoid it.

That's a situational sauce for me, but I can have that one. It's still to me a nice spicy. I agree. It did go straight to the back of my throat, but I still enjoyed it. It's not like- Oh fuck, I did too much.

I wouldn't. Oh God. You don't have to follow it The Dabam is pretty spicy this one. I'm feeling immediately. Oh my issue with this Oh, yeah, that one got me in the throat my issue with this. It tastes a little medicine-y like I don't love like the Overall flavor of it. I'm not sure you feel maybe that's just me. Okay Here we go. It got quiet. It got so quiet. Is this interesting?

Yeah, that one's spicy. That one's spicy. This one, I'd say this one is the first one that sucks. For multiple reasons. I don't think it tastes- I didn't love the flavor. It doesn't taste good. Yeah.

It is just hot. Let me tell you, it's starting to become a little bit of a hot box. I put too much of it. That was stupid. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It exploded a bit.

Yeah. Chompers are turning into a little crematorium right now. You know what competitive spicy pepper eaters often have when they're done eating a bunch of hot peppers? It's like milkshakes, chocolate milkshakes is a big one diarrhea I feel like diarrhea we got some chocolate milkshakes then we have a different kind of diarrhea oh all right that one is hot I ate too much of it it's hot yeah if we weren't doing this for content I I might just tap out now.

Even though I still am kind of enjoying myself. Because this next one, that was $135,000. This next one, $680,000. Is this number nine? This is number nine. This is the Marasano's. This one I personally thought was the hotter than 10. Wow, OK.

I'm just doing a little dab here. I'm scared I got it on my finger. It was a little dab 10. Wow, OK. I'm just going to do a little dab here. I'm going to stare it again on my finger. It was a little dab. My nose is running. I think I've weathered that storm almost. It's hot. It's hot. It's undeniably hot.

It's cheese and milk if you need it. It's hot. Yeah. Yeah. I haven't taken a sip of my milk yet. You keep bragging about it. Like, take a sip, man. I'm also waiting on my milk.

Oh, okay. Cause I feel like it's gonna, oh, I just got the gummy throat. I feel like it's gonna really- Compound? Yeah, it's gonna be hard for me to go back to that spicy after I have the milk. Oh.

All right, let me have this. Ooh, here we go. Chili Mono Loco. This is a secret mix of super hot peppers, lemon and go. Chili Mono Loco. This is a secret mix of super hot peppers, lemon and vinegar. The bomb. From Costa Rica, here we go. Oh shit.

Doesn't immediately punch me in the face, but I feel it coming. Tony, I feel like it looks like you put blush on, but it's just the pepper. It's natural. Oh, my nose is running. Oh, it's so embarrassing. My nose is running.

Check that there too, Sean. My nose is running. Like three sauces. Our nose is running, yeah. You guys were like, oh, this is pretty good. Not bad. Yeah. That stuff's tough.

Yeah. Yeah, that sucks. That one is immediately, that's peppery. Oh my God. That's tough stuff. Yeah. Our health is more important than our content, so keep that in mind. Nothing is more important than content.

We're almost home. Last one, last one. Yeah. That one's hot. Mitch, are you ready to double the intensity? No. How about quadruple the intensity because we're going up to 2.6 million Scoville units with this last one.

Oh, the last one is honestly just kind of hitting me. Yeah This is the hot ones the last dab it's hot the last one is not fun hot no No, we're just in dare food territory. Oh god. This one is This is nasty. Oh, it's got like a dark brown gloopy of Character like fucking Baron Harkin and would be soaking in it Fucking nasty. I don't put that in my mouth This is protesting a little too much here this is

Over 91% of- Sorry. I'm losing it. Sorry. Okay. This features the hottest, the world's hottest chili and 91% of this recipe is comprised of pepper X, the world's highest, spiciest pepper. I'm gonna have a little regular water.

I have not had water or milk yet. Again, I don't, I think you should. You're allowed to. I have not had water or milk yet. I have. I don't, I think you should. You're allowed to. I'm going to. I'm going to. All right, here we go. I'm gonna take a decent sized dab here.

On hot ones, do they let them drink? They let them have drinks throughout, right? It's not just at the end. Yeah, yeah. I did two dabs, tiny dabs. That's what I did. I do not like that worm. Does it make you feel better to know that DJ Khaled

tapped out on the second or third hot sauce? God, he can't eat anything. No. No. I put that one kind of the center of my tongue. I don't know if that was the right move or not. Mine got the left side of my mouth. Oh.

That's bad. It's hot. It's hot. That's bad. I'm okay, but I think it's gonna creep up. It's gonna creep up. Ooh, yeah. Oh, my nose is running again. Mm.

Ooh. Ooh, it feels good. Sorry to our audio listeners. To quote Alexander, I sound like a big old choo-choo train. Ooh. You got bitter beer face, Wives. A little water in the mouth for a second. Tony, any final thoughts?

Honestly, doing it a second time, and this is like less sauce than I usually did. Yeah, it feels good Like like a hurdy good for me. It mostly felt good until like the final two or three Yeah, I feel like the final ones. I'm not really like putting on something to enjoy No, I'm gonna finish it. Yeah, I'm doing it just Getting across the finish line. Oh Fuck. Oh Yeah, yeah. No, I got it. Oh, yeah, it comes in and like oh man

I don't know if the water was an idea water might actually exacerbate it might want to switch to milk now. Yeah. Yeah But yeah, I Enjoy it. I really yeah, I'd find I get it like Like I said hurts hurts in a good way. What is your guys' favorite one? I kind of really liked the second one. Yeah. That was good. But also, I mean, I like the salsa verde.

That green I liked a lot too. The Los Calientes Verde was really nice. Oh, fuck. Yeah, I liked that first one. Oh, it just comes in waves. Yeah, fuck. Yeah, I like that first one. Oh, it just comes in waves. Yeah, it's hot. That's bad. I'm not going to shit my brains out. I mean, yes, I mean, I mean, all right. And don't you every day?

Oh, yeah, we ate Taco Bell earlier. Oh, yeah. I got a chocolate milkshake. We're right by Shake Shack. We can make that happen. There's no way to make the shit worse, right there you go yeah like we got like two gallons of water I drink more milk or water or something Tony Charlene Ramos thanks for joining us for oops all segments Mr. Max Seeker with more Mr. Heat Seeker you got a problem buddy yeah it's spicy I'm a bit of a heat seeker. A bit of! It's key! I drink your heat!

Nice! Sounds like gloat. Ah, it's hot for me now. It's spicy! Thanks to Tony, we'll be right back with more Oops All segments. Yeah, thanks a lot, Tony. Fucking asshole. That was great. Fuck.

All right, continuing on here with oops all segments with Tim Heidecker. This segment is ruin my day. Okay. We've done, I think we've done this before, Mitch. Yeah, I've done this before. I think so. I found it new to me. I think this is a new one.

It'll certainly, or I think this is one we've done before. It'll certainly be new to Tim. Mitch and Tim are given a crummy food-related scenario and must each determine if that scenario would ruin the other person's day or not. If guessed correctly, they win a point. So this will be like one, I'll read it to you, and then you'll guess on his behalf. And you just have to be honest?

Yeah, you have to be honest. I'll be honest. I'll tell the truth. All right, this first one, these were compiled by our associate producer Amelia. This first one, these were compiled by our associate producer, Emilia. This first one I am supposed to read to Mitch. Tim has had a busy and stressful day at the office, but is looking forward to the delicious lunch he prepared for himself.

Come lunchtime, he opens the fridge and realizes someone else has eaten it. Mitch, does this ruin Tim's day? Man, this would ruin my day. I think it would ruin Tim. This is a day-runner for Tim. That's the question. That's the question. I think no. I don't think it ruins his day, but I think he is upset.

Tim, what do you say? Absolutely correct. There's so much more of the day to come at the lunch hour. So if I'm not over it by dinner time, I'm an asshole. But I will say this, I don't have, the lunch is my first meal of the day. I do the intermittent fasting thing. So especially lunch is exciting, period. We did office hours that goes till noon and I'm ready to get done and go upstairs and eat anything. That's when the peanut M&Ms are gonna start coming in. Yeah, that could be my first meal of the day,

to be kept. But so, you know, whatever, I'm not too picky, but I want to know what I'm eating. And if I had something that I was excited about in the fridge and it wasn't there, I would be bummed, but not ruined. I think if it happened with either of us, we would take it to our graves, basically. I would be bombed, but not ruined. I think if it happened with either of us, we

would take it to our graves. Basically, I'd be very upset and, but big people are, I get, I can't function without food, like I get so lightheaded. I can't focus. I started to feel like I'm going to lose consciousness. So you can't do the intermittent fasting thing. I've tried it before.

It's been tricky, but I have tried it before and I did lose weight. It was just like, it's, my brain was just really tough in the morning The the big thing at there I would be would be like what is my move if I have some options like I have there's A couple string cheeses and like some almonds I can approximate a lunch, but if there's nothing It's just like not eat that does ruin my day. Yeah, if we don't get food in them by lunchtime There's a good chance. He's gonna pull a falling down most likely and by lunchtime, there's a good chance he's gonna pull a falling down, most likely.

It's gonna go on some sort of rampage. You know, and this is dark, but you know this thing at my house growing up, the thing my dad would say, and you were allowed to complain, but if you were complaining too much, you know what he said? What's that?

Call the kid in Ethiopia. Yeah, all right, dad, sorry. That always hit me. You're right. We's all right, dad. Sorry. I'm sorry. I don't, that always hit. You're right. Yeah. Yeah. We were so grateful for everything. Yeah.

If you didn't finish to that, though, they were, which, which is a complicated thing to have you finish everything on your plate. When, if you're saying you're not hungry too, you know, right. It leads to disordered eating later in life. Yeah. Anyway, uh, you get a point there, Mitch. Next one. This is for Tim.

Here we go. Mitch goes to an event where he's expecting catered food for dinner. He shows up hungry and upon arrival realizes they're only serving light snacks, easy carrots and ranch, cheese and crackers and no meat options. He's stuck there for a few hours before he can

grab a proper meal. Does this ruin his day? Uh, first of all, days over. Yeah. Mmm. That's a good point. a few hours before he can grab a proper meal, does this ruin his day? First of all, day's over. Yeah. Mm. That's a good point. The day is kind of over. But you're a night owl.

I am a night owl, I do have more time left. I'll say it ruins your day. I know I'm not playing here, but I am going to guess this does not ruin your day, but I'm curious what your response is. Nick is correct, I'm sorry, I'm not playing here, but I am going to guess this does not ruin your day, but I'm curious what your response is. Nick is correct. I'm sorry, I'm being honest. I would, because I would, I would, after the event,

what is the event? Is this like a premiere of a show that you know somebody on, but isn't a show you're excited about? I'm at the real time with Dolan. Yeah, yeah. You're at their premiere party they have every season. Well, I don't really,

I'm not invested in getting this right. Yeah. Right at you. By the way, I was working as a page there, I told you right next door at the Wood Ranch, they would go a lot of the time. Oh. One of Bill Maher and his many girlfriends,

and then Ben Affleck was there one time. Uh, is that a steakhouse kind of vibe? Yeah. It's like, it's, it's a, what, how would you describe what ranch? Like kind of like chops and. It's, it's like a, it's like an upscale

barbecue restaurant, but it is very chainy. It is very much like black Angus. It's just a newer version. Yeah. Uh, no, it would not ruin my day. I think I would afterward, I would snack on everything, and then afterwards I would go and get some sort of horrible meal.

Well, I mean, I should have known. You're very affable. You seem like a very affable guy that would kind of roll with the situation. I would lie about it at least. I would say, oh, that's fine. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, eat a carrot or whatever.

Non-confrontation. You'd be annoyed, but you'd power through it. All right, next up, this is for you, Mitch. Tim hosted a dinner party and is in charge of roasting a chicken. He forgets to put on a timer and leaves it in the oven for too long, burning the chicken. He serves it anyway, and the guests are still polite,

despite it tasting dry and rubbery. Does this ruin Tim's day? Huh. You know, I don't think so, because I think the guests, they're gonna be so happy to have such a great host, that they're not to worry about the, Hey, the chicken didn't taste that great. You know, they might be saying that on the way out the door in the car.

They might say the chicken wasn't too good, but at what the host was, it was a, what a blast the host was. So I knew I would have known that the chicken was known that the chicken didn't come out the way I liked it. Does that wear down on you? I don't think it's gonna ruin your day. You say no. I say no.

I don't, again, the premise of ruining a day is something I can't really, I can pretend that I'm in a Sunday morning comic strip where I would be a character who throws his hat down, you ruined my day! But that's not how human beings actually are. strip where I would be a character who throws his hat down, you ruined my day. But that's not how human beings actually are. Yeah, yeah, the game is almost flawed in a way.

Yeah, yeah, I'm sorry to bring attention to that. No, no, no. And Weiger's now distracted by the dock again and wants to pet it. Trying to eat the minions. All right, next one, this is for Tim. Mitch splits in half a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup to find it has maggots inside.

Does this ruin his day? Got a vocal reaction there. Yes, a very, very big tell. That is horrifying. Yes, I think it's something you would move past throughout the day, depending, yes, I would say you will, it does not ruin your day. I think it does. What do you think?

I'm sorry, I'm not trying to do this. I know, I know. It ruins my day. That's totally ruined your day. It's really disgusting. I would just be thinking about it all day. You didn't eat it. You were at luck. I mean, I don't know. Yeah, you saw it. You broke it in half. But would you break apart a Reese's cup?

No. See, this is the other thing is I probably would take a big bite of that. Yeah. Ugh. Well then if that's the case, which is actually more accurate to the situation, then it would, I would say, yeah. So I was given some bad input. Yeah, you were giving, this is also a weird world where we're breaking Reese's into.

I'm just reading the prompt, but I'll give you a point for that. Yes. I'll say two one, two one Mitch. All right, next one. Tim is eating lunch at a diner when he hears a shriek coming from the table next to him. He looks over and sees a cockroach scurrying

over a woman's plate. Does this ruin his day? Parenthetical note, this actually happened to me at the bright spot in Echo Park, which is now permanently closed. I lost my appetite and it ruined my day. So it would have ruined Amelia's day. It would have ruined Amelia's day.

It did ruin Amelia's day. May have ruined the bright spot for good too. See now, this is tough because I now. The other problem with this game is we're competing against each other now. And I have to be honest. Yeah. I don't really have to be honest.

I just, that is also true. You could just lie. But knowing you, I feel like, I feel like I have a, you know, the, what was the device where you could cheat with the Nintendo games? The Game Genie? The Game Shark?

The Game Shark or Game Genie. Because I think the answer is no, none of this stuff would ruin your day. None of it will ruin my day. Wow. Uh, Mitch gets another point. I mean, I can give some examples of shit that would ruin my day. Like a car accident.

Well, if like food poisoning. Yeah, sure. Like that would generally ruin my day. Would a car accident ruin your day or would you just be like, that sucked? And then. I mean, it depends. Is it a fender bender or is it like I'm injured?

Yeah. Or I injured somebody. it a fender bender or is it like I'm injured? Yeah. Or I injured somebody. Just a fender bender. No, it would, it would, yeah, it wouldn't be, I wouldn't put it as a day ruiner. That would ruin my day, I think. So there is, there is a, there is a difference. But it's.

Don't hold a lot of value to days. Interesting. Like the good things happen bad, most days are pretty boring. This is a nice day. Having a good day. I got a question. Can I do one off the top of my head?

Sure. Tim, you have to go into Headgum Studios to record a Doughboy's podcast. Is that ruining your day? No, no, no, no. This is a real one. Mitch gives a box. It's a bright spot. Wow. Mitch gives a box of It's a bright spot. Wow.

Mitch gives a box of Randy's donuts to a friend for his birthday party. Later that night he discovers his friend, let other people eat them all. And neither the friend nor Mitch got to try one. A little complicated in my brain, but I think I'm tracking it. Does this ruin Mitch's day? Yes.

Mitch is nodding along. This one is a big time yes, apparently. Yeah, it gets me mad. This is a. I even zoned out during half of that and I just went for it. I went 50, 50. Which part makes you mad? The part that where you didn't get to try a

donut or your friend who you gifted them to. Yeah, I'd be mad at everyone else. I'd be mad at everyone else who ate the donuts. I was like, I got him the donuts and I didn't get one. Like he should get one first. Yeah, your friend not getting one. That's a bummer. Like the, the, and like, I got him the donuts and I didn't get one. Like he should get one first and then he's second. Yeah, your friend not getting one, that's a bummer.

Like that's an error. The pyramid is him, then me. And like me, I'm like one B. You know, I gotta try one. And then everyone else after that. But I think if your friend gets one and you don't, I don't think that ruins your day. No, I would be like, oh what the fuck?

I'd say, well, wait, come on. But then I went, you know. All right, here you're still annoyed. I would be like, oh what the fuck? I'd say, well, why? Come on. But I want it now. All right, here's one for Mitch. Tim goes to his favorite restaurant in LA and has a delicious meal. 30 minutes later, it becomes evident that he's gotten food poisoning

and spends the next hour and a half in the bathroom. Does this ruin his day? That's not fair. I should have held my tongue. It's my fault. It ruins his day. Yes, seems like it would. I showed you my cards.

All right, final one. I believe it's four to two, Mitch. This one is red to Tim. This is for three points. This is for three points. This is worth three points. Mitch puts a Cook Unity meal in the microwave and sets the timer for two minutes and 30 seconds. A what?

Oh God. Cook Unity meal. It's like a meal prep brand. So he puts one of those, a prepared meal in the microwave, sets the timer for two minutes and 30 seconds. A what? Oh God. Cook Unity Meal. I know what this is. It's like a meal prep brand. Okay. So he puts one of those, a prepared meal on the microwave, sets the timer for two minutes and 30 seconds. Feeling frisky, he decides to go upstairs and use the time for intimate self-exploration.

When finished, he goes back downstairs to discover there's still time on the clock remaining. Does this ruin his day? This is also based on a true story. Mm. Well, what's the shame, what's the problem with it there still being time on the, that he thought it would be a good use of the time

and then by the time he came down, it would be time to eat? I went upstairs and I jacked off. There was two minutes on the, two and a half minutes on the timer. And I came downstairs and there was still time on the timer. Yeah, so if you're all ashamed by your efficiency, then maybe that would be what would ruin your day.

I don't think it ruins your day. I don't think it does either. It doesn't ruin my day. That's three points. Swing. Wow. Wow. Congratulations, Tim.

You win. Oh my god. You win this edition of Ruin My Day here on UPSOL Segments. Walk off. Walk off. The Phillies. Yeah. The Phillies.

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with our friends from Your Kickstarter Sucks. Jesse, Mike, this is a single item must be banished cookout edition. Now, when we were in a single item must be banished, cookout edition. Now, when we were in Atlanta with y'all, we reviewed cookout, if you remember. This is however, not about cookout the chain restaurant. This is about the idea of a cookout. Like a general, like a backyard hang

where we're gonna hit the grill. That would have been confusing if you hadn't specified that up top, but now I think I am ready to go, Nick. Yeah. All right, great. Once again, we went to the restaurant cookout with you. That has nothing to do with the bus.

It has nothing to do with the bus. Don't be thinking like, hey, I'm gonna get myself like the cookout burger with the corn dog on the side and like a watermelon shake or whatever. Like it's not that, not that cookout. Yeah, wait, wait, so I'm in my car? No, you're not in your car. You're not in the drive-through.

Right. This is it, you're in a backyard. Right. I'm at home, what's going on? Why are you guys doing this to me? I got, I see the items up on the screen right now and I already have in my head what I would get rid of. So this is our version of the one gotta go meme.

This is a single item must be banished. We're talking about items that would be a cookout. Again, just the idea of a cookout, not a generic cookout, not the restaurant. The first category is pork. Your options are pork ribs, pulled pork, pork sausage, and hot dog. A single item must be banished.

Man. Let me just say the bottoms here are saved. The bottoms are so safe for me. Both long boys, sausage and hot dog. I'm not getting rid of either of those. They're so cemented in. It's the top two that are the question for me. I don't know how you guys feel. I can go first. This is an easy call for me.

Actually, I get rid of pulled pork. Even though I like pulled pork, even though I like pulled pork, I just feel like it's at a lower tier than everything else on in this category. The other thing I will say is that hot dogs to me are, are I think of all beef Franks. I know there are pork and beef hot dogs, but like I think of that less as a pork product.

Uh, and, and so, you know, there's, there's an argument for, for exercising hot dogs, but for me it's pulled pork. Oh no, I love that. I love them. The pork cut. I told you this, there's an argument for excising hot dogs, but for me, it's pulled pork. Oh, no, I love the pork cut. I told you, this is my mom and I had this conversation. Right. The pork mix. There's like a pork and beef mix, right?

Isn't there? Don't they do pork or something like that? Yes. I don't know. How do you guys feel? Are you cookout fans? You like cooking out? I love the restaurant.

Yeah, I went there recently in Atlanta. I had a great time. Yeah. I know I agree. I think the sausage and the hot dog both have the immunity idol on this one. They're not even in contention to be dropped off here. I guess my one point of clarification is

we're thinking pork only, right? We're not thinking holistically about the food itself because like you said there's some easy Substitutes here we can make for basically everything on the screen. I think that that yeah the exercises is for me. It's It's it's pork and beef hot dogs Saying if we're saying like Okay in the same way that pork ribs does not encompass all ribs, like it does not encompass this like beef ribs in this like hot dog here is a hot dog that has pork in it. It does not mean all hot dogs. I think that's what you're

saying. So sausage too, it would be just a non pork sausage and pulled pork. So would be Yeah, you could have like a turkey sausage or like, yeah. Yeah. And what would pull pork pull. Yeah, you could have like a turkey sausage. Okay. Yeah. And what would pulled pork, pulled pork is, if you could. It's like barbecued chicken, like you could do. Yeah, sure. Okay, okay, okay, okay. This exercise is sort of the pedant's dream.

We love talking about what exactly do we mean when we say one gotta go, or rather, what, sorry, what is it, what are we doing? What is it called? A single item must be banished. A single item, what do we mean by that? Yeah, so if we're not thinking like what's the most easily substituted for,

just like thinking, okay, the pork thing here, yeah, sausage is safe, hot dog is safe. I don't eat a lot of ribs because obviously they're super messy, and then when you're preparing them on your own, it's like, is it really ever worth the effort and expense? Yeah. But really, the pulled pork is almost always

just a vehicle for the sauce and I'd rather do something else with my time. So I would say that one needs to be banished. Yeah. I kind of agree. I would say get rid of the quesadilla and the corn dog. What are we doing? The menu is already cluttered as it is.

It's a mess. And a BLT, I mean I never trust a BLT for any type of fast food place like this. A BLT at a cookout? You know, what the f***? I mean what do we? I was gonna say, I was gonna say, get rid of the sausage, keep the hot dog.

Wow. Only because sausage, sausage, well, let me finish. Only because sausage and hot dog kind of similar, shape food type wise. However, I reconsidered my choice and said ribs at the cookout. You want something you can easily grab and go and you're not, it's not messing around. Okay. So I'm gonna say get rid of the ribs. Wow. Old pork you could at least put on a bun. So I get that. I am tied between the two. Yeah. Who was the person who said let me finish? Wasn't there a politician who was like, let me finish?

Ross Perot. Was that the line we were trying to think of? It was Dana Carvey as Ross Perot. I don't know if Ross Perot ever actually said it. Was that the line that we were trying to think of when we were saying like what? I think so. One of those things. You know, when they go talk or whatever, the president. a, one of those things, you know, where they go talk

or whatever the president. Yeah, oh yeah, no, I know, I know. It's a South Park thing too, when the Canadian guy's like, can I finish, can I finish? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm finished, I don't care about that. I say pulled pork and ribs are two things that are like also, ribs are almost borderline,

I don't even like them unless they're very good and I think that they can be bad a lot of the time just a bad rib yeah they can be so for me I was leaning ribs with that I'm like pulled pork I wouldn't if it was out of cookout I wouldn't even want it and that can also be bad a lot of the time yeah I'm going pulled pork DB I was almost on your side but pork is the answer. All right. I think that's the logistical versus the passionate choice. I think that makes sense. Yeah, thank you.

Thank you, Jesse. Thank you. So we have 10 of these. So if you maintain this pace, this will take a full hour. Okay. All right, cool. We're in. Well, no, we're in.

We're doing good. Yeah, we're good. Next up, beef. Category is beef. Your options are brisket, burger, steak, and beef kebab. One gotta go, a single item must be banished. And this is, we're in a backyard barbecue to be clear. This is, yeah, this is like a cookout scenario.

Oh, shit. This is so easy for me. It's not, I mean, I would, honestly, I'll tell you right now, get rid of two of them. Get rid of the kebabs and the steak. I could care less about steak. You're such a dumbass. I'm a... I'm a...

I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a...

I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a...

I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... The kebabs might as well be like the dressing on them. You're just doing that to make your grill look pretty. That's not food, we're not eating that.

Get rid of it. Interesting argument. I'm gonna say, look, I'm the burger boy. I'm gonna keep burgers for sure. I also like myself a steak as a treat. Like for me, that is like a nice, and look, you could say that, argue that a grill is not the best way to make a steak.

I think you'd probably do a better job in a cast iron skillet, but still, if the idea is to take this exercise at face value, I don't want to get rid of steak entirely. Where it gets tricky for me is brisket and kebab. Because there's nothing here I dislike, all four of these are just, you know, they're all going to be hitting for me. I guess what I think of here is the degree of difficulty on brisket is a little bit higher, which maybe makes me think that kebab is a safer choice, but also, you know, a higher ceiling I feel like on good brisket.

And it's also so distinct and makes me think of barbecue. So I'm gonna go brisket. I'm actually gonna keep brisket rather, and I'm gonna to exc brisket rather. Uh, and I'm going to excise, uh, beef kebab. For me, I mean, like with steak, it's the steak and the kebab are like two very similar, but I'm also from the home of steak tips. Like in the Northeast, we love steak tips. Right. Like, uh, like make sure it comes up to room

temperature before putting it on the grill. Yeah. Yeah. Oh brother. Use a lot of salt and pepper. Yeah, we love stuff. We love steak tips. When the internal temperature is 140 degrees,

you've hit medium rare. Yeah, yeah. Right. That's interesting. Cook the steak before you eat it. Right, yeah. That's a big one, that's a big one. Yeah, that's one of the biggest,

that's the biggest steak tip. That's a big one, that's an important one. That's one of the biggest. That's the biggest. That's the big one. It's an important one. Um, so for me it is, this is tricky. And I was like, and then I was like, I don't, the Northeast, I don't re I love brisket and I think it's delicious. I also just don't have it at barbecues and cookouts. So I'm going this way. Yeah. Where I'm like, I would never want to eliminate brisket. If you're like, you could never eat any of these ever again. I'd be really sad. Yeah. But for, for the idea of a cookout, I'm not usually having brisket at a cookout. And I love it, but I'm just not having it.

And the other three, I feel like I'd see more in the Northeast. So I'm going brisket. Wow. Even though I want to go kebab because you can like, it's the same difference, but I also, I like the idea of kebabs at a cookout. You like the idea of kebabs, but you don't really like kebabs. That's the problem. Yes. That's the problem. Sorry, Nick.

No, no. I was just curious as just regionally, is that like, is the Tennessee BBQ scene, is that more brisket country? Is that more pulled pork territory? Mike, you may feel differently. I would say pulled pork is at the top of the list of stuff you would see around here. And it's just so underwhelming. That's for me. Wow. That's not like a barbecue scene here. More Memphis, right?

Yeah, Memphis is really where it excels. And the ribs there are fantastic. The ceiling on ribs is super high. I love the ribs there are fantastic the ceiling on ribs is super high I love the ribs there. I love the nachos is a big thing in Memphis in Nashville as well to a lesser extent But yeah, you don't see you don't see brisket a lot where we go porkers What the fuck where did we go? Why are you and I together? Oh porkers pig leg? I think Yeah, pig leg porker. Yeah, it's very good. Yeah, it's a good place. DB, what say you? I would also, I think the choice is clear.

I'm getting rid of the kebabs. Get them out of here. Get them out of here. And just to let you know, we are pretty close to that 60 minute time frame that we were talking about before. So for two of them, we basically have stayed on schedule. Next up, chicken.

Your options are wings, grilled breasts, tenders, and skewer. Tendies to me have no place in this backyard scenario. I mean, even wings are a little bit suspect on the grill, but if we're just thinking about like, what's the thing I want the least? Honestly, a grilled chicken breast in the backyard is never exciting. I guess if you want a healthy option, but I don't fucking know.

Oh man, I love grilled chicken breast. Yeah, it's incredible to me. You I'm being, I love it. I'm being serious. I'm being genuine. Yes, I love grilled chicken breast. I think I would get rid of the tenders too, just because they're strange here. I'm getting rid of the tendies, yeah.

But I wanna kind of get rid of the grilled chicken breast more. Wow. You love it? What do you do with it? Why do you season that bad boy? Do you do a sauce? What do you do with it? How do you season that bad boy? Do you do a sauce? What do you do? Yeah, I mean, a lot of times it's like a gochujang marinade. I have very, I love to do a sous vide on a chicken breast,

which I know is very fussy, but it works out great. And it's so tender and so juicy on the chicken breast. I think it's great. Like you said, high protein, low calorie option. Yeah, hey Jesse, it's Mitch here. Just pick fucking one of the four Hit our time allotment in two minutes Skewers it's it's skewers get rid of skewers. Wow, wow saves the attendees DB. Uh Probably I'd probably go standees also.

I'd probably go standees. Get them out of here. Yeah. It's for the kiddos. What the fuck? On the grill? You're fucking out of your mind. Well, they're not on the grill.

Clearly they're not grilled. They can have some candy. They can have some candy. Yeah, we'll give them fucking candy. Next category, condiment. A single item must be banished here. Ketchup, mustard, mayo, hot sauce. Everything I want, but for me, this is an easy choice

in terms of getting rid of one of them. Ketchup gotta go. I knew you'd go ketchup. Fuckin'. I gotta have my hot sauce. I'm a bit of a heat seeker. And mustard and mayo, I think are a lot more versatile than ketchup.

We're outside at the barbecue, you know, we're backyard. I don't think I need mayo back there. I think I'm fine with not having mayo on the. I like mayo on my burgers, but I don't think I need it at the cookout. I don't think I need mayo back there. I think I'm fine with not having mayo on the, I like mayo on my burgers, but I don't think I need it at the cookout. I don't think I need mayo. A squirtable mayo, and it looks like here, this comes from one spoon that someone goes inside

and spoons one thing from the mayo container, comes back. Well, I don't think we need a literal, I think these are like a visual representation of the thing, you know, generally. I don't think it's like literally, you're getting this one spoonful of mayo. Okay, all right. Or this one pool of ketchup. Honestly, you know, generally, I don't think it's like literally you're getting this one spoonful of mayo. Okay. I think or this one pool of ketchup. I love hot sauce, but I don't think I would put it on burgers or dogs. Maybe I get rid of the fucking hot sauce.

Wow. Hot sauce is gone. I love it. But hot sauce is out. Wow. Geez, I think hot sauce would be indispensable for a baked bean side in the backyard. But other than that, maybe you're right. Maybe there's not a lot that you need on. I think I honestly, I would rather have relish than mustard. So mustard could go for me. I would, I'd rather put relish. I'd rather put relish on the dog and relish on the burger. So I don't really need the mustard, but maybe hot sauce is the better choice just cause yeah. What am I, what am I spicing up there? I don't know. Now I don't know. Pasta salad. I don't know. What do you, what do you, what do you, what am I? What am I? Spice? I don't know. Yeah, what? I don't know. Pasta salad? I don't know.

What do you? What do you? What are we doing? Do you? What's your is that your choice? Hot sauce? Yeah, I think I'm going to go with hot sauce. Also, I was going to say mustard, but because I don't really. But I do love a ground mustard and yeah,

the yellow mustard is what is turning me off. I anti mustard crew. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, don't put that on me, don't put that on me. I'd probably go hot. You got a little mustard looking shirt on today. I do, I got a yellow shirt. That's fun. Yeah, safe to eat a hot dog later, you ought to be good to go.

Should we do a speed round? Next one is salads without leaves. I think we're picking up the pace a little bit. Okay, now bafflingly, potato salad is not included in this compilation, but maybe that's an easy- Is that the bottom right or is that egg salad? No, it's egg salad. The options are that Amelia compiled these,

pasta salad, mac salad, food salad, and egg salad. I don't know who has a fucking big bowl of egg salad at a cookout. Certainly not me. That one has to go in this contest. Egg salad is gone immediately. Amelia, choices one and two are the same basically. Mac salad is different from pasta salad.

It was just two noodle salads. Yes. Yeah. I mean like I think the fruit salads gotta stay stage is because it's egg salad goes egg salad goes Who for me I I agree it's more of a potato salad thing than an egg salad thing But I'd rather eat egg salad than fruit salad fruit salad is for when you're recording a podcast I would also have to get rid of the egg salad and substitute potato salad. Potato salad gotta be in there. Yeah, if potato salad was in here, which it should be instead of egg salad,

then maybe I get rid of either one of the pastas or the fruit salad, I guess, in that case. All right, we have another salad one. This is salads with leaves. At this cookout. Oh, without leaves is the one before. Yeah, salads without leaves we just did. This is salads with leaves.

At this cookout, Caesar salad, Cobb salad, Greek salad, and barbecue chicken salad. A single item must be banished. This is insane. I don't know what the scenario is where you're having a Cobb salad in the cookout. A Cobb salad and a barbecue chicken. I mean, I guess the scenario is where you're having a Cobb salad in a barbecue chicken I mean, I guess the barbecue chicken salad stays because it's like it has a barbecue barbecue in it

You got it right there, but Cobb I love a Cobb salad, but that's just it doesn't make sense in this context I would say Cobb salad must be is the one that must be banished here I mean Caesar none of these sounds really me. honestly, did you say that's a Greek salad that won't have fruit in it? Yeah, there's a Greek salad. This doesn't look like a Greek salad. No, it does not look like a Greek salad. It's like it's got blueberries in there.

It's like fruit salad. It's an olive, what do you mean? It's olives. Are those olives? Oh, those olives. Oh, they're olives. Oh. Wait, so what are the, are the red things bell peppers?

They look like strawberries from here. Oh, they're tomatoes. Tomatoes, okay, okay. Oh, they's tomatoes. Okay, okay. I'm going to give her a Cobb salad. Tomatoes, olives, vegetables. We don't eat those.

Cobb salad goes, but then I'm also thinking if you're using like real, well, the barbecue salad you could use real chicken too. And both have avocado, it looks like. I'm going, salad is gonna go Yeah, the brown derby creator of the cob salad. The only one left is in Walt Disney World. Mm-hmm used to be right Oh my god, Mitch. We're taking so much time. What the fuck? God forbid

Dude, what is your choice? I think that the Greek salads gotta go I don't really fuck with that at all the olives are no good get it out of here There's also no credit are really appearing in there, so I still question that and I'll let a feather some feta flakes Yeah, I would get rid of the Caesar salad not much going on here. Yeah That's fair. That's a bad-looking salad. That's the only one that's on a looks like it's on a paper plate in this scenario Yeah, all right It's a bad looking salad. That's the only one that's on a, looks like it's on a paper plate in this scenario. Yeah. All right, let's go to the next one, which is sides that begin with the letter C. We've got cornbread,

coleslaw, corn on the cob, and cheese and mac, aka mac and cheese. It's almost like the category was bad. This is tricky, cause I like all these things. I'm getting rid of coleslaw out of all of these. Man, I love having some coleslaw.

It cools everything down. I mean, if you have pulled pork, then you put it. You went stream mode. You went streaming. Hey, you went stream mode. You went, you went, you went streaming. Hey, we're going streaming. That's old school if it was made today. Oh, that's funny. Yes.

Yep. I guess my answer would have to be cornbread or coleslaw. No. Oh no, actually mac and cheese maybe first. Corn on the cob you can't get rid of corn on the cob is not tricky. I think it's cornbread in this context, which I kind of hate that answer, but there's no good coleslaw for me. Coleslaw. Well, maybe, honestly, maybe it's the mac and cheese and I got the max salad already. I think,

I think it's mac and cheese. It might be mac and cheese. I mean, for me, it is coleslaw cause I would just rather have mac and cheese, I guess. And then coleslaw, of course. Uh, but yeah, I'm going to go coleslaw. It makes me sad. I don't want to get rid of it Mac and cheese is baby food get it out of here Wow To actually yeah, it is a fun hot take. This is a hard one. I'm gonna have to say I'm gonna have to say coleslaw You get a nice cornbread Bread yeah, yeah, you get a nice mac and cheese. So everything on your plate is hot right now.

I just want you to imagine this world where everything on the plate is hot. You don't have a single cold item on your plate. Is that the world you wanna live in? Hot food rules. Got ice cold beer. Yeah, but it's a fucking cookout. It's, I don't know.

Nice cold beer, TB said. No, it's nice. That's a good argument. I don't know. I think I reluctantly dismissed mac and cheese. Let's skip ahead to the last one. This is number 10. Oh no.

Do you wanna do all of them? I mean, this last one looks funny. Let's do the last one. The last one is. Oh no, hold on a second. No, I do wanna do all of them. Okay, all right. We're gonna do all of them.

Let's just do them quick because they also look very insane. Utensils, spatula, tongs, ladle, and whisk. Okay, I'm gonna get rid of the whisk. I'm also gonna say whisk is probably not a good word. Okay, sorry, so that one was easy. It's whisk easily. All right, next one.

Family members of the cookout. Wow, mom versus dad? Your options are parent, sibling, aunt, uncle, and children. A single item must be banished aunt, uncle, and children. A single item must be banished. Get rid of the children. Yeah. I guess it's children.

Yeah, maybe this is an adults only scenario. It's easier than the utensils. I mean, Jesse, you have a family, so. No, it's the uncle. This guy's showing up talking about politics, not at the cookout. That's actually a good point. Yeah. You guys actually, you're both fathers, correct?

You both have children? Yeah. So for you, maybe it's harder to get rid of, you know, sit and get rid of the children seems. Not at all, no, no. Get them out of here. All right, that brings us to our final one, friends at the cookout.

Wow. Your options are Nick, Mitch, Jesse, and DB. A single item must be banished. I think it's clear here that Mitch and DB are safe. The resident party animals of the pods. Right, yeah. It's just a question of what weirdo do you want there? Is it Nick or is it me?

I don't know. I mean, I'd be happy to dismiss myself if it would make everybody else have a good Bitch I was gonna say that yeah I dismissed myself, but not so that you guys have a good time is for me to not have to be there I'll also dismiss Mitch No, and honestly, I would probably dismiss myself because I just probably wouldn't come to this thing. That is true. You probably just would not show up. And the most likely to just not show up.

I had a blast with you guys. That was fun. We had a good time. You guys had fun. We had some lovely times hanging out together when we've all been in the same space. This is what I'm saying. We've had a great time. Can you guys please promise we'll do a cookout together sometime, please? That would be a lot of fun Let's make it happen. I'm with those two guys. I'm sucking on a dog, and I realize I'm sucking on a titty like you say

Things get horny. I don't know what happens. You don't know what's gonna happen. You don't know what's gonna happen Anything okay one gotta go penis pussy ass or titties at the cookout Things get horny, I don't know what happens. You don't know what's gonna happen. You don't know what's gonna happen. Anything can happen. Okay, one gotta go. Penis, pussy, ass, or titties at the cookout. Which one's gotta go? Get rid of the ass. That's where the shit comes from, gross. Wigs, penis, pussy, ass, or?

What was the fourth? Oh, titties. Titties. Titties. Fuck. doing ass or What was the fourth titty's That's tough you can't this is the hardest one. I think it's the hardest one This is one of the hardest ones we've ever had yeah, I Guess I'd say penis yeah Okay, leave that thing at home boys Yeah. Okay, leave that thing at home, boys. You heard him.

No, you're probably right. The penis probably has to go. Hey, as much as I love my old thing, I'm just there to eat grub and swim in the pool. And honestly, if you're swimming in the pool, you don't have your penis to worry about. I mean, maybe it's a better time. Yeah, I also say, get rid of that fucking thing. I'm only doing maintenance on the goddamn thing lately anyway, so just get rid of the sum of it. All right, that was you.

Your Kickstarter sucks. Jesse and Mike, we'll keep this going on the other side. Continuing on here at Oops All Segments with Jackie Johnson, Jackster, we got some rice cakes here. You ever fuck with a rice cake? No. I have not had a rice cake in at least 20 years. That's a great response. Mitch, I don't know if you remember this era,

but there definitely was a time when my dad was like, I'm going to eat healthier, and he's having more rice cakes as a snack. Because there was a time when they were like, oh, that's a healthy thing to do. It's low-fat. but there definitely was a time when my dad was like, I'm gonna eat healthier, and he's having more rice cakes as a snack. Because there was a time when they were like, oh, that's like a healthy thing to do. It's low-fat.

It's just, you know, it's... But that was before everyone was conscious of carbs. It was a different era in nutrition. I feel like we've eaten rice cakes on this show before, and I've never liked them. I think they kind of suck. Yeah, they're bad. I'm looking at them now.

I don't even have a drink. They're coasters. They're like food coasters. But do they have any nutritional value? I feel like recent times, we wanna eat nutrient dense snacks. Things that will satiate our hunger, but also give us protein or give us something.

This is sort of, like disordered eating food. Yeah, I mean. If that's fair, like. I, I. We have the very exciting salt-free rice cakes. Yes. And then Weigar has lightly salted.

I have lightly salted. And then we also have apple cinnamon. So we have these are. Well, we've really run the gamut of flavors. Three of the most boring things we have ever eaten on the podcast. I mean, this really is, the ingredients for this are whole grain brown rice and salt.

So it really is just compressed rice, frozen or dried into a patty and ready for consumption. As far as- You know what I bought last night? A prime drink. Wow. You know, what's his name? Jake, what the fuck is his name? Logan Paul.

Oh, his brother's Jake, Jake Paul. Logan Paul's. Has his own drink? He does. He has like a Gatorade. I thought it was an energy drink, but it says no caffeine. I think it just has B vitamins. So what happened is they have a caffeine free version

because it became popular with kids. And so they were like, okay, we got to have a non-energy version. Oh, okay. So you had the baby version. Ooh, ooh. to have a non-energy version Okay, so you had the baby version You have a baby how was that close? How's my goo goo was it pretty good yeah, it was really good my son actually inherited my voice He has like kind of a smoky quality to it. Yeah, it's really smoky baby voices. Yeah

He's like Should we start with a the I guess we should maybe just start with a salt-free cuz that's the plane Yeah, I guess we could start with salt free rice cake. Y'all don't eat into the mics right people hate that We try not to cuz of this This looks like the best rice cake. I'm gonna give it to you. There's also Apple. Yeah, doesn't it look good I mean it they all look very bad. They look like they look like shit. So the smell test Smells like packaging like Amazon packaging. Yeah Now do people eat these plain? Because I feel you could put peanut butter or some avocado or something.

I used to make an avocado toast thing with rice cakes and avocado on top with everything bagel seasoning or something. This sucks. Eating it plain, it sucks. It's awful. I mean, this is worse than just like a slice of like Wonder bread We don't have drinks Well, I've do you want some water? Yes on my water. This tastes like cardboard. It really does right up If I fit into my Amazon package

Oh Wags Can I call you wise that feels really intimate. I love it. You were going to read the nutritional information. Oh yes, I cut you off. I need a plate Wags. I need a plate. You need a plate? That sounded like my son.

Plate! I'm trying something here. Hold on. Watch. You're going to like it. Do I like a walrus? Yeah. Yeah, you do gonna like it. Do I look like a walrus? Yeah. Yeah, you do. Mitch, you do. Yeah, yeah.

Just like one. Just like a walrus. Yep. I got you, shit. You look like a walrus with evil eyebrows. I don't look like a walrus you like. I can like smell them over here, which is really odd.

They're truly disgusting. Yeah. Right? Yeah. They smell real bad. But no, you are the walrus, Goo Goo Jupe. That is really odd. They're truly disgusting. Yeah. Right? Yeah. They smell real bad. But no, you are the walrus, goo goo goo jube. This has 35 calories and it is all carbohydrates.

Okay. I mean, it's seven grams of carbs and basically that is less than a gram of protein, no sugars, no fat. So it's basically nutritionally inert. It's like nothing. Yes. This is subtle.

Like I said, this is what on diets eat. You're gonna bounce on your head? Let me check this shit out. Look at this guy. Finally! You're finally pretty good at it. Oh yeah, put the plant on it like a coaster. No, that's not gonna work.

Can Jemmy eat rice cakes or no? You know, I don't know about dogs. No, dogs eat no rice. Yeah, yeah, that's totally fine. She can try some. Rice is good for their little temi-tems. What do you think? Jemmy's not that interesting.

Jemmy doesn't want it. She's more interested in your hand. Well, my hand is covered in gravy. If you put it down on the couch right in front of her, she might take it. God, she hates it. Wow, if a dog won't eat it, you know it's a sin. She's bored by it. Good girl.

All right. All right. We're stepping up to one level. Yeah, we're going from unsalted to lightly salted Wow, I do love salt. I give that plate over to Mitch Mitch. You know you need to play Amelia. What the fuck? This is really one of the worst things we ever options were all like cheese flavored, which is The other options were cheese flavor. It's not vegan friendly Fuck sorry, I don't know if there's any better. It doesn't taste like any salt at all

Oh, but it doesn't lately when you first put it to your lips you taste salt on your lip But the taste has no salt. Well, it's one of those things where it's actually the same thing. They just package it differently sucks I'm sorry about who has to vacuum this chair. I'm gonna be honest with you, it's worse than communion wafers. Yeah, I agree. I like communion wafers more. Not even impressing God right now. Mm-mm. Body...

Heh, heh, heh, heh. That was pretty good. Would I look like a bee? Would I look like a hornet? You look like a bee. Jackie's putting those over her eyes. We got a walrus and a bee-wag. Yeah, I was trying to do an,

you have to do an animal with the third one. Okay, I think it's something, hold on. With the third, no, with the apple flavor. Okay, okay, I'll figure something out with the apple. Yeah. All right, we got apples as last. Zero out of five. These are both big time wax.

Hey, don't say he's gotta do something and then the last one's an apple one. We know what that means. He fucked an apple once. You're gonna do an ookie rice cake? I think no, you're just gonna fuck it. Like, call me by your name? It was kind of a call me by your name,

and it was inspired by a literary text that was in a Henry Miller book. I don't know if I would show through this. Tropic of cancer. Okay, I could fuck with this. Let me bite this one. It still sucks. I can't remember those ones from when I was a kid. I could fuck with this. Let me bite this one. It still sucks. I can remember those ones when I was a kid.

I could fuck with the apple cinnamon. That's not bad. I mean, this sucks, but it's a million times better. This is food. This tastes like, what's that cereal? Apple Jacks, yeah. No, they were like coated in like a kind of a cinnamon-y. Oh, yes, I know what you're talking about.

Like a sticky, cinnamon-y kind of, my grandma had it at her house. They look like little blobs. I think they're rice. I think they're rice puffs. Rice puff cereal? With like cinnamon. I know exactly what you're talking about.

Yeah, yeah. I don't know. Is this grape nut or something? No. Grape nuts taste like dirt. I know, I know. I'm just gonna find out. I can like see it in my head.

It's making me think of Apple Jacks, but I know you don't mean Apple Jacks. You put your hand and it would stick, which these have a sticky to them. Yeah, they're very sticky. I'm finding this out. This one's still a whack for me, but it's like, it's way better than the other two.

The other two are just like, I don't know why these exist. What's the nutrition on this one? This one's covered in sugar. It's got a little bit more calories, now substantially more sugar. Yeah, this one's covered in sugar? I'm a little more calories now substantially more sugar Yeah, this has this has three grams of sugar. So as a health food goes, I mean, there's no point needing this golden crisp No, I kind of feel like it was the one with the frog mascot there's honey snacks That was the one that was the one that's what that

Was it honey With the frog If I see the cereal yes Wasn't the frog kind of like a case is on fire Yeah Honey smack sticky like this yeah the cereal itself For the win, honey, Casey up to that. Yeah, Casey said the frog. I don't know what he said to Honey Smacks. Look, remember they were sticky like this. Yeah. The cereal itself.

It was very much at Grandma's house. Yes, my grandma had it. Now the Honey Smacks mascot now, he looks like he's kind of like a cool hip, like, you know, urban frog with a sideways hat. But I remember there used to be like, I'm the Honey Smacks guy. Wasn't the frog more of like, it's me, Honey Smacks.

Like, he was that kind of guy, he's like a bayou frog. Yeah, it's fucking bullshit what they've done to the Honey smacks guy. Well wasn't the frog more of like, it's me, honey smacks. Like who's that kind of guy, is it a Bayou frog? Yeah, it's fucking bullshit what they've done to the honey smacks frog, is that what he's saying? They did the same thing. You're right, in the old image, he's got like a regular hat facing forward. Yeah. Oh wait, Golden, Golden Crisp,

now his hat is backwards. Yeah, he's another guy that's kind of like made sort of a little bit more contemporary, but he was another one that's like, it's me, Sugar Bear from Golden Crisp. They were all like that back in the day. This is Bayou erasure. We like, we're upset about this. The one that ups that, that I, is I'm the most frustrated by and I understand it, but

I think it's just like them like over sanitizing children's entertainment. The Cookie Crisp mascots used to be a villainous robber and a dog. I remember that. There was a little dog with a mask, it was very cute. Imagine if we dressed Jemmy up as a bandit. How cute would that be? That was the old mascot.

And then they got rid of it and just made a generic wolf. It's just the Cookie Crisp wolf now. What's that doing? Oh, Cookie Crisp. Yeah, yeah, Cookie Crisp, that was the dog. But like the wolf doesn't have the have the same juice bullshit. It sucks Anyway, does anyone still eat cereal? I? Will on occasion but I always some honey nut Cheerios. I enjoy yeah, yeah, of course we love magic spoon

Of course we love magic. Yeah, yeah use promo code Joe boys at checkout To save do y'all do as for athletic greens we have done athletic greens. Yeah, did you won I? Don't get paid by athletic greens. Yeah, that shit is incredible You should get paid by the best BMS of my life. Oh, they're like clockwork 830 it's time every day I'm in that bathroom for ten seconds Incredible I tell everybody there hun's $100 a month though. Wow.

With all the taxes and shit. Yeah, but use promo code doughboys for 10% off checkout. 20% off and five free travel packs. There you go. That sounds good that morning BM, especially after I've gotten a good night's sleep on my Helix mattress, which really puts me back. There you go.

I like Helix sleep for real, you know this. Why do I say for real? Does that mean that's some I don't like? Those bomba socks I slapped too. Bomba socks are great. And of course I'll sleep like a baby after the best jack off of my life with flesh light. Promo code doboy is a check out, save 50% off.

Promo code doboy, you can get an extra small flesh light. You having that issue where your flesh light's you can get a promo code. You can get an extra small flashlight. You having that issue where your flesh is always falling off as you **** it. There it goes into the shower once more. Now, you gotta pick this thing up. Order

now and you can get Mitch and Wig's special fleshlights. Stop. Picture this. Stop. That could be around your hog. How much would you do? I would do that. I would do that.

Yeah, I would do that. We would both do it. We'd both do it. You would let him do like a plaster cast of your mouth? 1,000%. I think that's so funny. We'd probably do it, yeah. We'd figure out the logistics. What was that woman in the 70s who You would let him do like a plaster cast of your mouth? A thousand percent, I think that's so funny. Yeah, we'd figure out the logistics.

What was that woman in the 70s who would like do all the dicks? She would like plaster cast all the dicks of the rock stars? Right, and that's like a plot point in Drive Away Dolls. Oh wow. Yeah, they use that reality. This is the first time in a podcast that that movie has come up twice. So, I'm gonna say, ever. Anyway, here's my rice cake character. That reality this first time in a podcast that that movies come up twice

Anyway, here's my rice cake. I'm glad that that fat is My mouth was our mouths or stuff. I don't even know what animal mine was my mouth was stuffed much like if I was a flesh light. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha You're getting crazy. You're getting crazy. I think we might release this on main. This might be on main. More viral moments. Any other thoughts on these fucking rice cakes? Why did you all review these? Why not? It was Amelia's pitch.

It's fine. There are so many weird ass snacks. That snack aisle, every time I go down it, there's some weird new company and I always buy them because I'm just curious. And there's bad ones. Here's- I should bring some of them in here for y'all. Hey, welcome back. Here's where I found out-

In three years I'll bring some in. If you want the weird snacks, you know where a good place to go is? Target. Oh yeah? Wow. Because I was in Target yesterday. What a tip.

And they have the weird shit. They just have a lot of the weird shit I think it's also like I don't know if people grocery shop at Target Target as much I don't know what the deal is, but they I do Albertson's a lot and and There's a Gelson's not too far in a trade goes not far, but I don't go to trade It was like ever yeah, just cuz I'm paying the ass to get into

and Trader Joe's not far, but I don't go to Trader Joe's like ever. Just cause it's a pain in the ass to get into. They got weird snacks too. And Gelson's is expensive, so I'd rather do Albertsons, but Albertsons is kind of expensive now too. I mean groceries are expensive. Everything's expensive. I do Trader Joe's probably with the most frequency,

but I'll pop into a Sprouts. Yeah. You know, I like Sprouts. I think Sprouts is better. Sprouts got the weird snacks. They got some weird shit there. Yes, I just got, the brand is called Quinn, and they're gluten-free pretzels. Wow. And I was like, brand is called Quinn and their gluten-free pretzels.

Wow. And I was like, that sounds interesting. No, these ones are legit. But then they had the ones that are filled with the peanut butter, which I was like, yes. And then they had pizza flavored filling and it was vegan. And I got them and they were disgusting. That would be a good dank or stank for y'all. Yeah, because I remember.

Is that Quinn? Wait, isn't that what y'all call it? It's a, it's a Drank or Stank, but I like Dank or Stank. Dank or Stank. They're both bad. Dank or Stank's more of a catch-all. Yeah.

I got a pretzel pitch for you. Not a pitch. I'm just saying, I've had these, I have had great pretzels in the last two weeks. Great pretzels. Wow. And I think how Pacus, we watched the Oscars,

we're movie buffs. Yeah, yeah. We were watching the Oscars as movies. Beautiful pool. We do the Oscars, we cheer. Yeah. Tim Kay and the Spoon Man, sitting next to each other, taking in Hollywood's biggest night.

Chomping on pretzels. Wow. That's right. Hope you don't have a George W. Bush situation. He choked. He choked on a pretzel. He choked on a pretzel. Yeah. And then, you know what? What he choke? He choked on a pretzel. He choked on a pretzel.

Yeah. And then, you know what? What if ironically, I was choking on a pretzel, someone threw a shoe at me? Oh, fuck this. Fuck it. We're almost done with the episode. How ironic would that be?

How ironic would it be if you were choking on a pretzel, someone threw a shoe at you? A double George W. I would love to see that. A double George W? Dub dub. A dub dub, double dub ya. And then all of a sudden as you're choking you paint. My many crimes.

Speaking about my crimes. Someone tells you about 9-11. I still haven't heard in 2024. Dots pretzels wise. I just had the original Dots homestyle pretzels. They have like a honey mustard one that's really good too. I saw, I went on the website. That's how much I liked them.

Wow. I gotta ask. Those little sticks. Yeah, they were fantastic. I gotta ask Catman if that was him. Well, I'll ask him right now. Wow. Where he bought them from?

That's, yeah, or just even if it was him who got them. All right, are we gonna wait for you to get a reply from Capacus or can we end the segment? I think we should wait for the reply. Okay. Did you bring the dots? Is that your go-to snack, pretzels? What do you like to chomp on?

Salt and vinegar chips. Oh my goodness, heck yeah. And is it Zach's tortilla chips? They're so good. Cause I'm thinking of there's Zaps, but I don't think of Zap as making your tortilla chips. No, there's Zach. Zach.

Like the guy's name. What did you say before Zach? Salt and vinegar chips. What did you say before Zach though? Salt and vinegar chips. Salt and vinegar chips. Oh, just salt and vinegar. Zach's mighty organic tortilla chips.

Oh, I don't know these. This is, you get them at Whole Foods. Wow. They might have them at Sprouts, but they have a lime one. Oh my God, it's so good. I could just be sitting there and not realize it and like black out and all of a sudden the bag is gone.

Wow. I've eaten like the whole, they're really good. Those look great. Yeah, they're like thick and this lime zest is really elite. I also love Siete, the Mexican wedding cookies. are like thick and this lime zest is really elite. I also love Siete, the Mexican wedding cookies. Wow.

The bag is too small. It's like that, they need to be bigger. I saw Galbackas and Jess Jardine, we haven't had Jess on in forever either. That's right. At a Chi dynasty last night. Wow. Los Feliz.

Los Feliz was popping. Oh my gosh. Last night, it was popping. What a scene. Wow. Wow. Los Feliz Chi and Queen. Los Feliz was popping. Oh my gosh. Last night, it was popping. Yeah. What a scene. What a scene. No answer from him, so maybe sadly, we have to end the segment.

Okay, our listeners will never get closure on that, but hey, that'll be it for this edition of Oops All Segments, we'll be right back. Oh. ["Oops All Segments Theme"] All right, continuing on with oops all segments with payment bands payment oops Mitch mm-hmm what was that oops like oops all segments oh that's a new thing now yeah I don't know I like it I love it oops I thought like I thought we could just you know I know it's good yeah I like we could just, you know. No, it's good. Yeah, yeah.

I like that also this will be like randomly like the fourth segment that you'll just start doing that. Oops. All segments. That's fun. It's a silly guy. Oops. All segments.

That's fun. Is it two guys? I think it is two guys. Do you want to be the oops guy? I think you were good with the all segments voice even though you came up with the oops then. All right, so you can be oops. All right, let's do it.

Well, okay. Oops. All segments. Should we try it the other way? All right sure. Oops. All segments. Why is your guy, why is your guy, why was your guy squid guy? I play it like a mind flayer. Yours sounded like they were underwater. Yours sounded like they were underwater. It was like a silly chef kind of voice. Oh, okay, okay. I'll work on it. Hey, this is a slop quiz from The Drop King. Wow. Hey Nick, hey Amelia, here's a slop quiz I made.

I'm more like the slop king today. Here's a slop quiz I made about sandwiches from movies. All the answers are foods, except the Happy Gilmore question. All right, maybe so I spoiled the quiz a little bit. Feel free to next or change any of them if you want, DK. Is that the answer you fool? No, it's just not, that one is not a food answer.

Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. But these are all sandwich movies. And Casey, if you wanna play along with these, feel free. All right, first up. As a slop quiz hot up. How's this? Slop quiz hot pocket. That's good. Like a pop quiz hot shot.

Yeah. That's good. That's what it was. But you know, your response was, that's good. I liked it. Or like smooth move hot pocket. Maybe that. I like that too.

That is good. I just, I'm waving hello to friends. We gotta close the curtain. So distracting. Ah. Pat, who's gonna come on the show? I met Pat. Oh, you did?

Yeah, we had a lovely conversation. All right. Okay, in Little Monsters, 1989, do you remember this movie? Yeah. I saw this movie. Fred Savage sneaks out of bed to make a sandwich with peanut butter and what veggie? Oh shit.

Peanut butter and Blake sandwich. In my head I thought it was Captain Crunch, but it's a veggie. Oh, I know what it is. Yeah. Onion. Mitch, you're correct. Yep.

You get one point. Wow, I don't remember that and that's insane. Yeah, I'm surprised you remembered that. Wow. Yeah, it's cool. I and that's insane. Yeah, I'm surprised you remembered that. Wow. Yeah, it's cool. I forgot that I shampooed my hair this morning, but I can remember peanut butter and onion sandwich.

You don't need to shampoo all that frequently as we discussed on our recent episode. I know, I know, I know. Okay, next up. Do you remember that movie, Casey? Do you remember Little Monsters? You might be too young for it. I remember. I don't think I've ever seen it, but I remember the poster. It was, was the Howie Mandel, the monster?

Yeah, it's Fred Savage and Howie Mandel in heavy makeup. He does a good job. He does good, yeah, he's good. He's great. I met him once, he was lovely. Ben, Howie Mandel? Howie Mandel, yeah, lovely. I was gonna say, Ben Savage, right?

Yeah. God, I think a bit in trouble. Was he kind of mean or something? Fred Savage was, got, yeah, got semi-cancelled. This is also a funny thing in California. Like, I showed Quincy people this, but like, you get like, Ben Savage is running for, what was he running? Like, district whatever.

Right, sure. He was running as like a councilman, that sort of thing. And you just get like a bunch of things with the kid from Boy Meets World or whatever. I get those in the mail and I laugh every time. It's funny. It is funny. It is those in the mail and I laugh every time. It's funny.

It's funny. It's hilarious. It is funny, it is funny. Question number two. In Avengers Endgame from 2019, Scarlett Johansson leads the remaining Avengers while snacking on what simple sandwich? Ham and cheese.

Not ham and cheese. I'm just making up stuff. PB and J. Mitch, you're correct. You've got two. Wow. I know any, if you ask me anything about Endgame, I can tell you.

I think. I just, a simple sandwich to me and I was like, peanut butter and onion was the last one. Maybe it's PB and J. You are correct. Yeah, you have two points. All right, next up. How can we forget that classic scene from Endgame?

Well, Mitch, I know you're gonna know this next one too. In Harley Quinn, Birds of Prey from 2020, Margot Robbie watches what kind of sandwich get made for her at a bodega before it's destroyed in a chase. I'm gonna say a gyro. Not a gyro. I'm gonna say a tuna chop. Not a tuna chop, although that's a good bodega answer.

I've seen this movie. I think it's a bacon, egg, and cheese? It is an egg and cheese sandwich. You're correct, Casey. Casey gets a point. Next up in the- Casey's in this? I said Casey could play.

What the hell's going on out there? They're being crazy. It's not- They're recording a better podcast. What's going on? People are like laughing outside. It's like the acoustics of the bathroom all of a sudden. Yeah. You hear sudden. Yeah.

Hear everything. Okay, here we go. Next up, in the Breakfast Club, 1985, Ali Shidi makes a sandwich with Cap'n Crunch topped with what sugary candy? I know what this is. Yes. It's the dust one that I can't remember the name.

Fun Dip? Yeah, no, it's in the straws. Yeah. Oh, Pixie straw? Pixies, Pixies, Pixies sticks. Pixies sticks, yeah. I guess I'll give it to you. Wow.

I'll give you each a point. You collabed on that one. I didn't earn it. I didn't earn it. Mitch has three. The fuck? Do you not want me to give Payman a point? Take it, take the point, Mitch.

You don't want to see him angry. Payman, you don't get a point. All right, Mitch has three. Casey has one. Payman yet to get on the board. Next up... Payman gets a point. I didn't realize he's not on the board. Don't feel bad. I didn't know anything. Now I feel bad. Next up, in UHF from 1989,

Weird Al makes a very unique sandwich, a Twinkie cut down the middle, with a hot dog covered in cheese whiz and Finally dunked in what beverage? Jesus like just saying putting a hot dog in a Twinkie was good enough drop king what the fuck yeah I kind of want to get a little complicated there. What beverage do you need to fucking dump it in? I don't know I I can't remember this one I'm gonna say root beer not root beer. I'm gonna say Mountain Dew not Mountain Dew. Oh I'm gonna say milk. Casey gets it. It is milk. say Mountain Dew. Not Mountain Dew. Oh. I'm gonna say milk? Casey gets it, it is milk.

Oh right, Casey. Yeah, that's a tough one, DK. Yeah, DK, minus one point for DK. All right, DK's in the negative zone. Next up, in Paddington 2014, the title character always carries what kind of emergency sandwich under his hat? Marmalade sandwich.

Yeah, you're correct, Yeah, it's four. Wow. Wow. Talk about difficulty going way down. I don't know, packaging these fucking marmalade. Kind of a chaotic ordering here. Okay, here we go. Yeah, maybe that's question one, DK.

What the fuck? You're doing this quiz for us for free. Make it better. Number seven, in The Fast and the Furious from 2001, Paul Walker orders what kind of sandwich on white bread without crust? On Fast and the Furious 1? The first one. The Fast and the Furious, the 2001 movie. Egg salad.

Not egg salad, but you're in the right ballpark. Tuna salad? Hayman, you are correct. Wow, two two. I stole that one. That's good. I knew it was some sort of salad-y thing. All right correct. Wow. I stole that one. That's good. I knew it was some sort of salad-y thing. All right, here's the Happy Gilmore question.

In Happy Gilmore 1996, Adam Sandler is sponsored by what sandwich chain? Subway. Subway. You know that. To both get a point. Okay, it's 432, is that where we're at? Number nine in point break, Gary Busey orders two. Wait, he's got three?

You got two, right? I got two, I got two. Okay. He's got three? 432, yeah. No, I have where did that first one doesn't count the picks have to take away the point No, I'm taking it away. I should know it's so funny. I didn't know it was neck-and-neck. All right fine You got you have to I thought I was fucking I thought I was killing this game. You're right. You're winning You're winning. You're right. He's gonna blow a stack next up What I said you're gonna blow your stack. Okay, all right.

What'd you think I said? I don't know what you said. You think you're gonna blow a load? Maybe. That's what you thought I said? Why would I say that? What kind of sense would that make? When he gets mad, things get weird.

I ain't sucking you off to win this thing. But maybe I would. this thing. But maybe I would. I think I think I think I'll take you not sucking me off to get an advantage. There's also no prize. No prize. You don't need to suck me off. Number nine in point break from 1991, Gary Busey orders two of what kind of Italian American

sandwich? I did not remember this one. I know, I know the line from the movie. Say it. Whoa! You do it. Utah, two, meatball subs. There you go. Wow.

Casey gets it. Casey might win this thing. Are you a big Point Break guy? I like Point Break, but that scene in particular, like, it's like the line read that he has, he's like He yells out of the car, he's like, Utah, two! Barry, always stuck in my mind. I love it. So wait, what are we at now? You got four, two, and Casey's got three?

I guess so. Are you okay with Casey having three points? I think we only have Casey over here. I'm not okay with it. No matter what, look, no matter what, I get to suck wags up. Just so you know. Yeah, but it's not like I'm not corrupt.

I'm not gonna skew the game. Don't impute my integrity here. Number 10, in Nope from 2022, the characters dine in a fictional chain restaurant called Copper Pot's Cove and eat what kind of sandwiches? Oh man, I don't remember. I did remember this one. You did? But I also saw Nope in the theater for the second time like last year. They screened it at the Arrow. French dip? It's not a French dip. I'm gonna say Monte Cristo. Not a Monte Cristo. Casey? I'm up for this one. They are fish sandwiches.

Copper Pot's Cove is like a fish show. They look good too. Kill Bill volume two, 2004. David Carradine makes- That's my favorite of his movies. I like Nope the most. Nope's great. I love Nope. You a Nope guy? Yeah, I love Nope.

Yeah, it's awesome. In Kill Bill volume two from 2004, David Carradine makes what kind of sandwich for his daughter while talking about shooting her mother? Oof. I'm gonna say ham sandwich. You are correct. It is a ham sandwich.

Wow. Well, look, now you're now we're in it. Now it's close all around. What is it? 433? Yeah. Wow, wow, wow. I'm closer to his dick, by the way.

I'm a... In National Lampoon's vacation. I gotta win this fucking thing. There's three questions left, Mitch. In National, it's anyone's game. In National Lampoon's vacation. Thank you for keeping this fucking thing. There's three questions left, Mitch. In National, it's anyone's game. In National, I'm Poon's Vacation. Dropking, thank you for keeping this quiz brief. Question 87. This is a classic, like, Dropking doing too much work,

and then me not going to the trouble to edit it and just doing all of it. Whatever. It's good. In National Lampoon's Vacation 1983, Chevy Chase is enjoying what classic sandwich before it's revealed that Dinky the Dog has peed on it. Oh man, I know this too and I'm not gonna. Bologna.

It is bologna, Mitch. 533. Case in point, but we can still tie it up. When Harry met Sally, 1989, what classic cat's deli sandwich is Billy Crystal eating when Meg Ryan, yeah. It's a Reuben. Is it a Reuben?

Pastrami. I'll give it to you with Pastrami, because I don't know if it's specifically a Reuben. It's a Pastrami sandwich. I mean, come on. That's also question one, DK, come on. Yes, and also, I wouldn't even take a point for that all right, so it's so whatever. What are we at still five three three? Okay, great

Finally is this the last question last question okay, so technically I win You're the magic number is a zero you want so anyway We did anyone can kind of can chime in on this one in my early report in 2002 a blind Tom Cruise accidentally eats a moldy sandwich from the fridge instead of the fresh one nearby with lettuce, tomato, and what kind of protein on it? Bacon. It's not bacon.

I remember this scene. This one's too specific, I think. It's a little too specific. It's a tough question. Lettuce, tomato, I don't know the last. Casey, do you know it? Man, I can't recall anything from Minority Report. I love it.

But I'm gonna guess it's like some kind of future protein like roaches. It's not that. I like that answer. It's just a straight up, do you want me to guess? What did you guess? You guessed bacon. So we have bacon, roaches, and Mitch's guess.

The army wonders if it's your standby ham, but I Think I'm gonna say Turkey, it is a turkey sandwich Mitch you win going away Way to go. Thank you We'll be back with more oops all segments, I'm gonna get some chapstick We'll be back with more oops all segments. I'm gonna get some chapstick All right, we're continuing on with Sierra Cato talking about the Weiger challenge that's right here on oops all segments Wow I'm gonna mystery beverage. Why is I gonna say this? Yeah, Jimmy went up between the two of you Yeah, which is this is huge for you, but I for you. But I think it's more of a testament

to how uncomfortable this couch is. I'm stuck with this couch now. Yeah, Sierra and I are sitting for audio listeners, are sitting on the one smaller, much more comfortable, much more back friendly couch. And Mitch is over there on the- Because the squeaky wheel gets the grease folks, that's why.

I have back problems. I do too, folks. That's why. You have back problems. I do too now. Back end, and my ass is killing me, Wags. We're gonna move. Okay, so we've got a, I've got a mystery beverage. The two of you must define what it is. So we have two liquids in front of you, two different cues. I will say these are the same brand.

So these are two different flavors of the same brand. So I got a question for you. Yeah. Blue or red? What's your favorite? Because as a boy, my favorite color was blue, which I know. Yes, one is blue and one is red. But for as far as liquid stuff, I

think I would always go blue. But I always like red flavored stuff better, more so than blue stuff, I think. And you're kind of red-pilled. I am a little bit red-pilled. I'm more of a, I think I would oftentimes go to blue for the novelty and then like the red more. The exception though is I like blue Gatorade a lot.

I think the blue Gatorade's are some of my favorite flavors. Yeah, yeah. You've got like chilled something. Yeah, I feel like red is more standard and maybe more plentiful. Like I'm thinking candy too. It's like got a lot of red Starbursts in the bag. Actually, now that you say that,

you're saying blue for the novelty, but red for the taste is what you're saying. I think that you are right though. Like the blue Gatorade is better. It is good. And I used to be a huge fruit punch Gatorade guy, but I've moved over. But I don't know, like cherry stuff is good, of course.

The younger, I like green and orange. Those are a couple other colors and flavors I like too. But this, I have no idea what we got going on here. It's a wider challenge for that reason. Yes, feel free to take a look at this mystery beverage. Give it a whiff, give it a swig. Okay, and this has a sweet smell to it, this blue. Mm, it has a sweet smell, the blue liquid.

And these are the natural colors of the thing? Yes, yeah. Okay. Nothing has been dyed, nothing has been altered. This is how it comes out of the container. Very interesting, Wigz. Mitch has taken a sip of the blue, says it's very interesting.

I'm gonna say this right off the bat. It is a zero sugar. Mm. I know that, that it's some sort of, there's some sort of sweetener in it. Interesting. You know what's, so it's such a striking blue. It's beautiful, honestly.

Yes. I think it kind of reminds me of like, when I more recently had, I'm not saying it's this, but Mountain Dew Baja Blast. Oh, sure. And such a, you know, loud branding and everything, but the taste was actually quite nice. What context were you having the Baja Blast and such a, you know, loud branding and everything, but the taste was actually quite nice. What context were you having the Baja Blast?

It was like the main drink at work. It was like you open the fridge and it was all down to Baja Blast. That's very funny. So I like had to surrender to kind of drinking it a lot, but no, it was good. I think I just intimidated by the name. Wow.

Where were you working, Doughboyz Media? That's wild. I was here, why couldn't you say hi? You've done a great job, honestly. All right, you're both sipping the red liquid now as I pet Jemmy, who is just an absolute delight. This is a tough wagger challenge. This tastes like a fruit punch.

Yeah. And sorry, so we're supposed to, we're just supposed to know like what the brand is of and then these two. Yeah, I mean, you can ideally, you're not necessarily supposed to know. It's, it's, uh, you know, it's a challenge, but I mean, if you want to guess what it is, they're so familiar to me. But maybe not. It's a challenge, but I mean, if you want to guess what it is. They're so familiar to me. But maybe not. It would make sense to me that they're familiar to you. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, what I meant by that is I'm not giving you a glass of orange juice or a glass of Coca-Cola Classic. It's not something that's going to be like, oh, this is immediately obvious. Can I tell you what I think it is? A little bit more obvious than that.

Obscure. Yeah. I think it's a red and a blue squeeze-it. Red and a blue squeeze-it? Mm-hmm. Were there still squeeze-its around when you were in school? Oh, well, that's a bad sign. Wait, is that the twisting thing?

Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. OK, yeah. Of course. That is a good guess. But if this feels like zero sugar, so I'm like, is this some sort of like, but then I was like, is it not zero sugar and is it just like a squeeze it?

It's like a Kool-Aid-y sort of thing, but I'm like, it could be zero sugar, it could just be like shitty quality, and that's why I thought squeeze it. I used to love squeeze it. Yeah, in my head I'm getting the Kool-Aid thing cause it does remind me of like Jell-O. Yeah.

It is very Jell-O-y. Kind of like the color of 3D glasses, I would say, the red and the blue. That's true. The old 3D glasses, yeah. Yeah, I like that blue and red combo. Doesn't help. No. Well, not true. Yeah, I like that blue and red combo. Doesn't help, no. Well, it is true.

Well, not helping. Yeah, it's that kind of, yeah, cool, like even the blue reflection off the glass is very like Blade Runner thing going on here. Yes, right. I am wondering, I'm like, is this, so is this like, hmm, what are those drinks that the blonde guy who's kind of Jake Paul, like is this

Prime? Could this be some sort of Prime drink? It could be a Prime drink. Cause like Prime drinks are like these like shitty sugary, I don't know. But you said squeeze it red and blue. Is that your guess or you're gonna take it? I'm just gonna stand by that. I mean, like, I don't know. This is a tough one. Yeah. I'm also like, is this some sort of Arizona,

like, fruit punch and like whatever, zero sugar? But I'm gonna just go red and blue, squeeze it. God, how do you even focus on the show when Jemmy's next to you all the time? Me? About his petting her fur. She's such a sweetie. I'm used to her. She's by you all the time. Me? About his petting her fur. She's such a sweetie. I'm used to her, she's by me all the time.

Yeah, I know, jealous. She's a little angel. This is, it is, this one is tricky wise. This is a good Wiger's challenge. Deira, any thoughts, any leanings? You mentioned something earlier. Yeah, I mean, I was gonna say like, yeah, I do think it's tough,

because I would say the context normally that I'm drinking something like this would be like chugging it. And like, this is the first time I'm aerating and sniffing, getting the notes. So that's probably, I should probably just chug it. But I think, man, it does, I mean, I still kind of think about that jello thing.

So maybe I think like a Kool-Aid jammer situation. I don't know about the blue though. Squeeze it, Kool-Aid jammer. This is tricky because the form factor is a squeeze it, but Sierra I think takes it because this is a Kool-Aid brand drink. These are Kool-Aid Bursts, which is their version of a Squeeze It. I mean, come on. Kool-Aid Bursts, Tropical Punch, and Berry Blue.

Oh, beautiful. Yeah. Stunning. I mean, it just kind of feels like bullshit. You think you should win because you said Squeeze It? Squeeze It is a different brand. I mean, I got the exact sort of thing it was. But Kool-Aid is closer.

You identified the type of vessel. You did not identify the liquid. I think of like, hey, this is a squeeze bottle of Kool-Aid. One person says it's a squeeze it, another person says Kool-Aid. I think the person who names it as Kool-Aid has gotten closer to talking about what the contents of the container are.

You're so mad. You're so mad. And you said squeeze it. I thought you nailed it because I didn't realize Kool-Aid these were different than squeezes, but I squeeze it is a general. That's why I said that first. I narrowed it down to a plastic bottle that you squeeze the things out of. You know, I nailed it. I pretty much nailed it.

Squeeze it is a different brand is the thing. Like it's a different brand. So I don't know what to, it discontinued in 2001. So I don't know. I think... Fine, Mitch. It goes to our guest. Our guest wins. Our guest wins.

Our guest wins. Our guest wins. Our guest wins, but you're so upset. I agree that. I mean, I just like almost guessed it almost exactly right. And it was hard. But she got Kool-Aid. That's closer. OK, OK, OK. You still don't agree. You still won't concede that much.

I think for if you get if you say the first guess and you say that it's a squeeze it bottle Red and blue thing. That's pretty fucking good There's also an argument. That's like first of all once one thing's clear our guest does not care This is the real thing is that he doesn't want, the man doesn't want to give me credit. Fine, you can be both, you're both winners. That's more like it. This is a tie.

Cool aid, squeeze it. I also, our best wins. Everybody's a winner. I guess the guest, but everybody's a winner. Everybody's a winner. Mitch can go home with his participation trophy. We'll be right back with more OOPS All Segments. All right, we're back. We're here with Judge John Hodgman.

Wow. For our segment, Food Court, Napkin Edition. Oh, okay. This is compiled by Emilio Marino. You should play the night court theme. That would be fun. Oh, yeah, it, boom, boom. Oh yeah, it's the bass line.

Oh, that sounds nice. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Sax one. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Oh, the sax part. Ba da da da. Ba da da da. Saxophone. Ba da da da.

Oh, the sax part. Ba da da da. Tick tick. Ba da da. Tick tick. Ba da da. Ba da da. Ba da da.

Tick tick. Ba da da. Boom. And bull. And bull. Bull's on the show. Bull, yep. Is his name Bull?

That's Bull, yeah. Richard Mall. Did his name Bull? That's how you do it. Bull, yeah, Richard Moll. Did he just pass? No. I'm not sure. Oh, I think he did pass away recently. Ugh, all right. Rest in peace.

Maybe we should check that. Yeah. I'm gonna look it up now. The great Harry Anderson, the judge on that show. The judge. Our good friend of the podcast, Eva Anderson's father. Yeah, very talented man. Such a talented guy. Yeah, everyone, Eva Anderson's father. So very talented man.

Such a talented guy. Yeah. Everyone, John Larroquette. Oh yeah. The cast. Yeah, incredible cast. Yeah. I used to love John Larroquette.

Now you hate him. It's weird how that turned. You ever watch the John Larroquette show? Sure. Yeah. I was rooting for that. With Darryl Chill Mitchell in the cast. Oh boy.

I like that last name. Just happen to remember. Richard Moll did pass away at the age of 80. Yeah. He was a great actor. He was a great actor. He was a great actor. He was rooting for that. With Darrell Chill Mitchell in the cast. Oh boy. Like that last name. Just happen to remember. Yeah. Richard Moll did pass away at the age of 80, this in October, October 26.

Big, and he was born in Pasadena and he passed away in Big Bear. Oh wow. So this segment is dedicated to him. It's true. Well, all right. Hang on, what was that rumbling? Oh, it was him turning in his grave.

This is Food Court Napkin Edition. First up, material. Horrible, this unfunny segment is dedicated to. Richard Moll. Richard Moll. It's gonna be great. Thanks for your service. Material, cloth or paper? Pick one, cloth or paper? I one. Cloth or paper? I'm locked in.

I'm locked in. Hodgman's locked in. If you get a cloth napkin, you're having fun. Also reusable, better for the environment. I guess you use water to clean it. I mean, I just don't see many scenarios where a napkin, a paper napkin is better than a cloth napkin.

Yeah. I mean, I could only have one scenario I can think of where you want to just throw thing and throw it away. Uh huh. Are you using napkins? Yeah. Like pounding off in your kitchen, like a fucking animal. Three day, three day blinds baby. Why are baby. Why are there napkins in your shower?

Set down your Jersey Mike sub and reach for your napkins. That's why they're in the shower. You're the whale. I think this is one where Natalie and I, Hodgman's locked in, Nally and I tried to move to cloth napkins at home at a certain point, because we're like, it's less wasteful. And it was a surprising pain in the ass. I mean, we still have them, but we kind of ended up going back

to paper napkins for everyday use, because it was a surprising pain in the ass to like just constantly be laundering napkins. I guess you have to have just like a ton of them. But, um... Yeah. And some of them never get clean. And some of them never get clean. They're just perpetually stained.

When we're drowning in the arc storm-wise, I'll think about that, how the, you know, gave up... on your cloth napkin experiment. I think I reluctantly choose paper, even though a cloth napkin is a more useful experience or a better napkin experience. Is the concept for the rest of our lives or just what we kind of prefer on a... I think it's how you choose to interpret that.

In other words, eliminate the other... Here's the thing, cloth napkins, if you're gonna be having a nice dinner party, if it's fancy, it's a holiday meal. It's, they're required. You know, you can't be serving paper napkins. And nor would I care to, because most paper napkins are terrible, until I discovered the Vanity Fair extra absorbent paper napkins, which I love.

Wow. Wow. I'm really into them right now. Would I choose them? That's what I was locked into. But if it's to the exclusion of everything else, like you have to pick one or the other for the rest of your life, it has to be cloth napkins. Because it's unconscionable to only use paper napkins for the rest of your life. Yeah, cloth napkins are nice. Speaking of cloth napkins, next one, cloth napkin placement.

But Vanity Fair Extra Absorbent Napkins, get at me, sponsor Judge Sean Hodgman. I wonder if they have those at Costco. Cloth napkin placement, on your lap or tucked into your shirt neck hole? On my lap. What the fuck are we? What's going on? I'm not in a Looney Tunes cartoon. Yes.

I'm not Tom the Cat getting ready to feast on Jerry the mouse. Tucking a napkin into my fur or whatever. And then licking my chops with a big cut cleaver and fork. When do you, I mean like when you eat lobster, I mean it's more of a bib anyways. Yeah. But when are you sticking this cloth down your shirt? Come on. I'm on my lap, but there is one scenario where I will have the shirt thing.

No, I'll say exactly what it is. And they do this at Hillstone restaurants. But if you're at a very fancy restaurant and you're wearing a button-up shirt and they have a buttonhole in the napkin, it's a lot of fun to put that buttonhole napkin on, like attach that to your shirt. You feel like a million dollars.

That's a very specific thing. I get called the silver spoon man, you're fucking buttoning napkins to your fucking shirt. Look, that's a fancy pants scenario, that's not an everyday dining experience, but if you find yourself in that situation, I encourage you to do so, otherwise it's staying on my lap. In the, there was a, nevermind.

Okay, great. Next up. Back in the days when I was a garbage man, that's right, fucking silver spoon man. I was a garbage man for summer while I was at college that my parents paid for. I, we didn't even have napkins. That's what we did, Wikes.

You did the old... Just wipe your hands off? Wiped your hands off and you were good to go. Yeah. Wipe them on the bark of a tree. That's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm talking about. You're driving by in your garbage truck.

That's what I'm talking about. Yeah, I understand. I'm gonna button my napkin into my shirt. What the hell is this? It's fun to do. If you were to Hellstone and you had a button up shirt and there was the button hole napkin, I'd encourage you to do it.

Yeah, try to be civilized for once. You and Arnold in Dock Rivers, the two people I've know have at a Hillstone in Santa Monica. I've told the story of the podcast before. A Humvee pulls up that's a camouflage Humvee and on the side it says, The Terminator. And Schwarzenegger is driving it. There's no valet here and there's no parking space either. So he just pulls out in front of it, gets out, and then his assistant is sitting shotgun and shifts over to go take his car and park it for him.

And then he walks straight into the restaurant, and this is a restaurant that does not take reservations, walks straight to a table and sits down. I think I saw Doc Rivers when we were there with Yousong. Oh, wow. Okay. That sounds familiar. I had a Boston hat on, and I think he was like, gonna avoid this guy. Yeah. And then now he's coaching the Bucs.

Yeah. Which makes me feel pretty confident about- And he's potentially a button napkinner. Probably is. Oh, I stepped on your thing. Oh, it just made me feel confident about the Celtics. Doc is Doc coaching the Bucs. Because I don't think that they're going to win now.

No. Doc was great in the booth. He was great on podcasts. It's kind of a bummer he's back coaching a team. He won a championship with the Celtics. Yes. Forever was great in the booth. He was great on podcasts. It's kind of a bummer. He's back coaching a team. He won a championship with the Celtics. Yes. Forever, I gotta love him. Yeah, it was a long time ago.

2008. Sports. I was gonna tell you about a PBS show. Please. Well, I don't know if it's PBS, but there was a mini-series made of the novel, Wolf Hall, which is a historical story about the court of Henry VIII.

And I watched that many, my takeaway from it, a lot of incredible acting. Wolf Hall, which is a historical story about the court of Henry VIII. And I watched that movie. My takeaway from it, a lot of incredible acting, but I really loved the way they handled their napkins in that time period. Because what they did was they put their cloth napkins, put them on their left shoulder at the table. That's cool. So you could dab your, you know, like wipe your hand or wipe your mouth.

And it was always here. It was not in your lap. I like that. I wish that would come back. That's cool. I do like that. They're probably bigger napkins. Also, they were using their hands.

They were like huge velvet cloaks. I mean, I like that. Velvet napkins would be pretty bad. But yeah, anyway. We're talking, we're talking Richard Moller earlier. That's reminded me of a PBS mini series of Moll Flanders. I watched, I watched short back when I was a kid. Direct connection. Yeah, it was real. But I was likeers I watched back when I was a kid. Direct connection.

Yeah, it was real, but I was like, I really liked, I was like, oh, this is good. This is really well done. It also had nudity in it, which was crazy for PBS. That's where you would go. Young John Hodgman's always watching. Catch a little nudity on iClaudius, that's where I was going.

All right, next up, frequency of use, a little at a time throughout the meal or all at once at the end? Oh, this is all napkin. Napkin, yeah. Oh, it's all napkins. All napkins, I'm using my napkin throughout the meal. Throughout the meal.

Throughout the meal. So fucking messy. Meal, y'all, what the fuck? You got shit all over your face, I'm gonna save it till the end? Yeah. Yeah. Plus we already got shit all over our faces.

We've got beards. We've got beards. You can't be not wiping down. Here's the thing about, and I'm curious about this as two beardos. I've had a beard in the past, but it's never been as beardy as either of you. I feel like the beard guck issue is a mustache issue. Or is it all, is it your whole beard or is it primarily a mustache thing?

Well, I dip my chin in my soup when I'm eating this. Okay. So that's an unusual situation for me. Got it, got it. I really try to get it in there. But I mean, it's around the mouth for sure. Okay. What's your question?

Isn't, is the people are like, oh, the problem with eating beards is the problem with your side when you're eating. More so the issue for me is that I get beard in my mouth. Right. And that's I need to clean it up. But is that also like, again, people are always like, the problem with beards is eating.

It's like it's such an obstacle for eating. But is that more of a mustache issue than a beard issue? Like, if you had the Lincoln, would it be that big of an issue? It's right here issue, I think. To me, that's a mustache issue. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a carryover.

But they call this the flavor saver for a reason. That is true. That's a great point. You know what I mean? That's such a disgusting term. Oh, I agree with you. So it's definitely getting down below the bottom lip. Yeah, as well. I like the guy who just has the flavor saver.

That was me in college. Wait, really? Yeah. I'll send you a photo. I love that. Very embarrassing. All right, next up. Paper napkin source.

From a dispenser or from a stack? I'm going stack. I'm going stack too because the issue with dispensers is sometimes like, you'll pull out like 10 of them by accident. That sucks. Yeah, and sometimes you pull and it just rips it doesn't come out at all you just rip off the top a nightmare yes stack them up I'll take a

stack any day give me the stack here's the bad part about the stack I feel like when you got stacks people are just fucking yeah they're like you're more likely to not have any there is someone will just grab like a huge they'll grab like four inches of napkins and just take them with them. It's like you don't need that many. What, you've seen me do this? Yeah. I'm totally getting deep in there.

I do take, yeah. When I'm into that dispenser, I'm going very deep. I'll take extra napkins for sure, but I try not to hog them. All right, next up, design. Plane. Plane. Hodgman's on the board with plane. The other option, holiday themed.

Oh, I didn't see that coming. Well, Hodgman, you messed up there because I think, I always think that like heavily, like colorized napkins are always like, I don't like using them as much. They suck, they're not as effective. They're not as effective, but I mean, who am I to turn down,

if I had a little Santa on my paper towel, I mean, come on. Yeah, holiday themed is fine for holidays, but really reads divorce dad to the rest of the year. That is true. We have some Halloween napkins in the headgum kitchen right now, recording this in February. So those have been there a while.

It kind of has that feeling to it. Brought me down a little. Yeah. All right, next up, wipe type, crumple or fold? Wipe type. Wipe type. I'm really a wipe type. When you're wiping up,

are we still talking about eating? We still talking about napkins or toilet paper? I, for, for, for- I was gonna say, I'd be curious if you do something different with your napkins and your toilet paper. I, for- Honestly, I'd be curious if you do something different with your napkins and your toilet paper, if it's the same thing. Oh, I do it both the same way, which is fold.

I do fold. Yeah. I don't really understand the question. I will say like this to me is a- Yeah, no, it's like you could fold the napkin and you wipe, or like you just kind of like, you know. And maybe I'm more of a crumpler. Wow, okay. What about for your ass? Or like you just kind of like, you know. And maybe I'm more of a crumpler. Wow.

Okay. What about for your ass? I'm a bidet guy. Yeah, but you wipe afterwards. I guess, yeah, I guess with wiping, yeah, more of a folder. I eat with a bidet, so. You wash your face off with a bidet? Yeah, I have one next to me.

A little port-a-bidet. Like that. I think that I go fold, I think I'm fold. Wow. Fold or fold? Yeah, fold. Okay, final one. This one's interesting. When fidgeting with one, twist it up or rip holes into it.

Oh my God. Well, that has to be paper. Paper napkin, yeah. I said that I probably am a twister. I'm a ripper. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too.

I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too.

I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. I'm a ripper too. little fettuccine strands. I'll twist quite a bit. Speaking of which, kind of, our double this week, it- This segment's for an unrelated episode.

It may come out in like June or something like that. Yeah, what the fuck, Mitch? We watched Twister for Love Week. We watched Twister for Love Week. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. We watched Twister for love week.