Doughboys - Regina Pizzeria with John Hodgman & Nicole Byer (LIVE)

Episode Date: November 14, 2019

We're joined live in Boston by John Hodgman (Judge John Hodgman, Medallion Status) and Nicole Byer (Nailed It!, Why Won't You Date Me?) for our long-awaited review of a Boston pizza cornerstone, Regina Pizzeria. Plus, a live edition of Snack or Wack or Drank or Stank. Recorded live at The Wilbur Theater on Sept 7th, 2019. Sources for this episode include: A 'Curse' born of hate by Glenn Stout https://www.espn.com/mlb/playoffs2004/news/story?page=Curse041005Red Sox-Yankees is baseball's ultimate rivalryhttps://usatoday30.usatoday.com/sports/baseball/playoffs/2004-10-20-yanks-sox-rivalry_x.htmThe Official Site of The Boston Red Sox - Fenway Factshttps://www.mlb.com/redsox/ballpark/facts-figuresFrommer's Guide: Regina Pizzeriahttps://www.frommers.com/destinations/boston/restaurants/pizzeria-reginaIs Regina Pizzeria really the best in the country? by Devra Firsthttps://www.bostonglobe.com/lifestyle/food-dining/2018/10/18/regina-pizzeria-really-best-country/KDNZQLh7lyPhhySRzf7E1O/story.htmlRegina Pizzeria websitehttp://www.reginapizzeria.comWant more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgum podcast. In 1903, fledgling pro baseball franchise the Boston Americans won the first ever World Series title. The team was changed its name to the Red Sox later that decade was a powerhouse in the early days of the major leagues. That is, until 1918, with the infamous trade of Babe Ruth to their bitter rivals, the New York Yankees. So began almost a century of baseball futility, punctuated by a number of so close,

yet so far gut-punched losses, as generations lived and died without experiencing a title. And the add insult to injury major league baseball in the 20th century came to be dominated by the hated Yankees. But during this extended dark age, despondent Sox fans found solace in a North End pizza parlor operated by Italian-American immigrant Luigi Diora. Founded in 1926, eight years into the curse of the Bambino, Diora gave his restaurant a name that in Italian means Queen Pizza. Incidentally, the order of its official name is often affectionately flipped by locals.

And just like the Red Sox have the Yankees, this pizza shop has an intercity-zaw rivalry of its own with East Boston's Centarpio's pizza. Speaking of rivalries, in 2004, after an astonishing comeback over the Yankees, the Red Sox finally won their first World Series in 86 years, a moment famously commemorated in the Jimmy Fallon film Fever Pitch. And so the curse of the Bambino broke like a dam. In a 21st century reversal of fortune, it's the Red Sox that have won four titles, this millennium, to the Yankees too.

And while some locals may prefer rival Santarpios, it's Luigi Diora's chain that has a location in Fenway Park and is the official pizza of the reigning World Series champion, Boston Red Sox. This week on Doughboys, Regina Pizzeria. Welcome to Doughboys Live. How you doing, Boston? Alright, I'm trying to figure out this mic stand. I think this will work. Guys, thank you so much for coming out. We're so excited to be in Boston for our first ever live show here.

Let's bring him out here, huh? This week's roast is courtesy of Bill W. Let me introduce my co-host, participant in the Boston low tea party, the Spoon Man Mike Mitchell. That's very nice. It's not going to be that good, folks. I am so sick and so nervous, Nick. People love you. They're excited to see you. You're going to do great.

I was making fun of you. Embrace the spirit of your Bill Pelichick short-sleeved hoodie you're wearing on stage. Earlier today, ow, fuck. What did you do? I bit the microphone. I'm going to fuck up a million times. Just this afternoon, I thought Antonio Brown was crazy. And now I think he's the next Randy Moss. It's great. Quick switch.

I don't follow the NFL. He was on the Raiders. He was on the Raiders and now he's on the Patriots, apparently. The wind was taken out of that sail. Thank you, Iger. I just want some context for what we're discussing. There are people out there who aren't sportos. There are people out there who don't follow the National Football League. You're cheering that? It's fine to have other interests.

My throat hurts. My bottom hurts. I mean, that's been a running theme throughout this tour. That's the format of this podcast. I'm afraid. I saw my Auntie Masha and Uncle Jim in line. I don't want to say anything bad. It's going to be so sad when we see walkouts and it's like my Auntie Pat walking out of the building. What do you think of Boston, Weiger?

I'm having a lovely time. We'll talk about it a little bit more when he's out here, but one of our guests gave me a walking tour of the city. That was delightful. You almost missed the train this morning. I did. That was in New York. We came from New York. We did two shows in New York. We got out there very late.

This sounds band-ry, but I am so much happier to be in Boston than I was in New York. I think you can agree with that. I mean, the tour is one night closer to being over. Yes, absolutely. Also in attendance, also here in Boston, Mrs. Mitchell, a lovely woman. She's out there somewhere.

Who I've been able to spend some time with and have grown quite fond of. All right, lay off, man. I don't mean that in a horny way, although I would like you to call me dad. You know I already do. Yeah, I was with my mom. I went straight to Quincy. Yeah.

And my mom said, I have a surprise outfit tonight. I said, that's good. And then I went into my room for a nap and she said, you're gonna like what I'm wearing. Mom, I couldn't tell you in person, but that's weird. Don't do that. Have you seen her since? Have you seen her in her show? I have not. She's out there somewhere.

Hi, Mom. I can't see you. Sorry. We'll find out after the show. I got her nosebleeds. They're way back. I hope she's in like Zeno Warrior Princess cosplay. It's the total like, wow, not expecting that. Okay, that is too horny. Emma is waving her phone at me.

What? Emma's over there. Oh, my mom is over there. Oh, she's in the wings. Hi. That's a nightmare, Mom. Oh, wow. This whole show is an extended no peeking test. My mom doesn't even know what that reference is. Oh, boy. That's a good section over there.

Welcome to Boston, my friend. This is my second visit, but I don't know if the first one was a proper visit. It was kind of a whirlwind. We went to one place, which was the same pizza place that we're reviewing tonight. You insist on the one place we had to go to. And then we spent most of the time in Western Mass. And then we came back straight to Quincy. That's right. Yeah, baby.

And we got lit up. We certainly did. Quincy guys go hard. Wu Tang gave Yu Song a shot. Yes. And we had to resuscitate him. Yu Song's in bad shape, just like right now. I think he's had as much as I've complained about all the travel and the lack of sleep and the late hours,

I feel like Yu Song has had the roughest experience over the course of this tour. That's very true. He's doing a great job. Can we have a round for Yu Song and for Emma? Round of applause. We're going to take him out behind the theater and put him down after the show. By the way, you mentioned on that topic, you mentioned I almost missed the train. Emma was staying a little further away.

She did miss the train. That's right. There was a whole ordeal. Thankfully, she's here and she got it all together. Did she just yell fuck? She did. Yeah. I mean, it's completely an understandable mistake.

We were out super late last night, but we are going to have to dock Yu Song's pay. But we had a lovely train ride over here. That's true. This is the end of the tour. Yeah. That's it. Is it the end of the tour? Is that a Gus Van Sant movie?

That's the Gus Van Sant movie. Okay. So that's going to end like our tour with a hotel room suicide. But yeah, it was a crazy day. We were a little harried. It was a little rushed, but I've had a lovely time here and it's a lovely city and it's very nice to walk around in. That's very nice, Nick.

I had a really, Mitch, you gave up on the microphone stand. I did. Should I do the same? Because I'm just holding this in my hand. I think I'm going to do the same thing. Yeah. Oh, you shot it off at yourself. I didn't mean to do that.

Okay. There we go. Wait, I got to find that clip. No, you don't have to find it. No, I do. Oh, God. Okay. All right.

This will feel a good 20 minutes. Okay. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. But we should, we have a lot of show. You okay? Yeah, I'm okay. I want to say, how the hell?

I'm sorry. It's a spoon nation and I'm a play a little drop. This will be embarrassing. Familiarity. Familiarity. Familiarity. Familiarity. Familiarity.

Familiarity. It came close. I can say, familiar al redy. I could say this reality. I just said it now when I'm out ofcularality. Familiarity God dammit. I'm not tomato. Oh, boy.

That's from Brian Cotton at BPC. He did that. BPC. Oh, he's here. Oh, hey, hi. He did say, I hope I can see you in Boston. Thanks for sending that in. Great drop.

Quality drop. My favorite part of the stage picture when we're playing those drops is you just like eyes locked on your phone in shame. It's awful. Yeah. My family saw it now. So whatever.

This is what you do. But hey, there's something else you do. Uh-huh. And, you know, we're projecting into a tour. We've had to, unfortunately, had to cancel some dates, but there's a good reason for that. That's right. And you have a, you are cast in a film.

That's right. I got cast. You have a movie role. Yes. And I believe, I believe you can, we can announce what it is. Yes. Is that right? It's an unknown name to everyone, but yeah.

I think some people will recognize it. Catch Mike Mitchell in the white clumps. The white clumps. I play every character at the table. And I don't need a fat suit. That's not, that's not the film. You're playing the, you're playing the peanut M&M in the M&M's movie. How many alts do you have on your laptop?

I got cast in a movie called Ghost Draft with Chris Pratt. Very cool. Very cool movie. I'm very excited about it. As you know, I'm afraid of ghosts. I don't know what the deal is yet. Right. But I'm scared.

I'm terrified. Yeah. It's great. It's a very exciting movie from, you know, I don't know anything about it. You've been honoring your NDA. That's right. And so I don't really, I don't really know what's going on with it, but it does sound exciting from what I, the materials that I've read online.

That's right. So congratulations. This is huge. Thank you. Thank you, Nick. Thank you, Nick. Thank you. Oh boy.

I hope this makes you feel better about missing out on Fat Thor. I've already been recast. This is awesome. When does it come out? I don't know. I don't know. I don't even know what I can say. I don't know.

Okay. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Yeah. Okay.

Got it. Yeah. Thanks for watching. Your whole family that's here watching this shit is at some point going to be able to watch an actual real production with you in it on the big screen. They can walk out without hurting my feelings. I'm getting, by the way, I feel, I'm like, I'm like wore out this, this Papa Gino sweatshirt. That's right.

And I'm honestly getting a little hot in it. So I'm going to, I'm just going to take it off real quick. What is this? Wow. All right. I feel better. Papa Gino's undershirt. That's cool.

I can do your tricks. You didn't even like Papa Gino's that much when we went. Did we go there? Yes. We reviewed it. Oh my God. Is that the place where we reviewed for a solid sound? Yes.

Oh man. I just, I was in a haze. I knew we, I knew we did a pizza place. I forgot which one it was. We should bring our guests out. We're already running on views. We absolutely should bring out, bring out our guests. First up, an actor, comedian, bestselling author.

His new book, Medallion Status, is available right now via all your favorite bookstores at bit.ly slash medallion status. Give it up for John Hodgman. One, two, three, four, five, six. Wow. Hello, Wilbur Theatre. I was just saying to the wonderful staff of the Wilbur Theatre, it's one of my favorite places to perform.

I have no, I have zero material. These guys, do you want to be on one of our shows? And I was just saying, and they said the Wilbur, I'm like, yeah, I do want to go there. Jamie, I'm so happy to be here. It's incredible to be here with you, Mitch, my fellow Commonwealth, the end of Massachusetts. And you double read. Last time I was in Massachusetts with you, the Commonwealth gave you a severe allergic reaction.

Yeah. I remember going to Papageno's because I think you were in some kind of weird fugue state. I'm glad you're feeling better. I'm feeling great. I'm glad that you're able to see Massachusetts in a slightly less hives light. I'm having a lovely time. You took me on a walking tour. We saw some of the sites.

I did. It was very different from Mitch's walking tour where he showed me where Chankton threw up. There's a lot of spots for that. Where Freobot took a shit in his Bruins hat. Here's what I was thinking. We're getting off the train. Yes.

And Mitch was going to go home and take a rest. And Yu Song was going to go do some work. And we were just going to walk to the hotel. Right. And I said, let's walk around a little bit. My feeling was, should I show Nick some of the major sites of this important, beautiful, historical city where I grew up, or should I get him to Quincy as quickly as possible and tuck him into my childhood bed?

Tuck him in nice and tight and not let him out until it was time to drive to western Massachusetts. I decided to show you a little of Boston. It was wonderful. I showed you Newbury Street. I pointed out where I worked at Conrants in the stock room. I showed you the Colonial Theater where I saw Marcel Marceau and Mouminschatz when I was 13, precocious, pretentious kid.

I showed you the Boston Common. I said, that's where a concert's on the Common. That's where I saw my first concert, the Thompson Twins. And you said, who are the Thompson Twins? And then I walked into traffic. But I did see one thing. After we checked in, I went walking around again to visit some other old haunts. But one thing I noticed as I was coming back on Stewart Street, walking towards the theater

and the hotel, I saw four businesses, arguably, in a row. I saw a blaze. I saw a halal guys. Then I saw Dunkin Donuts. And then I saw an urgent care center. And I said, this is the Doe Boys in a city block. If I do all those in a day, it's a grand slam. Guys, our next guest.

Yeah, go on. I don't want this to step on our incredible next guest. Okay, sure. Before we go any further, I do have a little drop. Oh, man. Oh, wow. Okay, Hodgman is queuing something up on his phone. That's right.

And it just came through right as we were going to dinner. So I didn't have a chance to do anything but this. This is a message from a fan of the podcast. Doe Boys. Greetings Spoon Nation. Dave Matthews calling John Hodgman's loon. Mitch and Water. I hope you have a great show.

John, next time you get lunch. Dave Matthews. Wow. Dave Matthews says Spoon Nation. Wow. Wow. Am I sick? This is the Doe Boys episode in Massachusetts where you get to experience a disconnect

from Real. That's insane. I met him at a thing, but I had his email address and I wrote him the other day. I just said, do you have any interest in doing this? And he said, sure. And he did it. That had a rule. Jesus Christ.

So welcome home, Mitch. Wow. Can I have it later? Yeah, I'll text it to you right now. Thank you. Our next guest is an actor and comedian from Nailed It and her great podcast, Best Friends. And why won't you date me?

Give it up for the Gold Buyer. That's... One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. I'm running through your nigga house like the Tomb Raider. You got a passing round nigga here, hot potato. I told him lead it or get out. That show all tomato. But stop licking my pussy hard.

That shit aggravating. He ain't mind. I just let him eat me off the tonic. Wow. I was going to do a cartwheel coming out, but I didn't want my wig to come off. And then I'm going to play my drop from Queen Latif. No, I'm kidding. Was that really Dave Matthews?

I don't even know what he sounds like or looks like. That's something that you realize if you watch enough Dave Matthews videos. Don't know what he sounds like. Don't know what he looks like. That is the best gift I've ever gotten in my entire life. Sorry mom, by the way, I apologize. But that's not it for guests, Nick. We got one special video guest.

Wow. And we can bring down the lights or play it out on the screen. Someone's going to check in one last guest. A little surprise for Nick. It might take a second. What's it going to be? I told him to put a 20 second just black screen on the top of the video. Wow.

Yeah. That's not, it's not us. You thought it was like a philosophical thing. We're the guests. Here we go. Okay, sure. Screen is black again. Okay, yeah.

Oh, what's it going to be? Okay, the Doughboyz logo is back up. What's it going to be? What's it going to be? I wish, I wish it were, it's a message. Here we go. Hey everyone, Chris Hansen from Hansen vs Predators and a catcher predator with a message for Nick.

You know who you are, Nick. Listen, I'm going to need you to have a seat right over there because I've been going through some transcripts and I see where you deserve congratulations on your recent tour that you traveled the East Coast and you went to Thailand. Wow. Awesome stuff. Now you can stand up, have a wine cooler or a Mike's Heart Lemonade.

You are free to leave and everybody out there in Boston, keep an eye on this guy. These girls are in places and I'll be watching. All right, take care. Oh, and by the way, Mike Mitchell says hey and write delicious. Wow. Wow. Chris Hansen from to catch a predator.

Hard for me to hear a lot of what he was saying. Me too. That's no, that's a performance issue. Oh, got it. But I did catch the... Well, he's got to be quiet because he's catching predators. That's true. He may have been mid, yeah, he may have been catching a predator.

He was in the backyard while someone was being trapped in the house. He just snuck out. He's like, got to make that extra cameo money. He also genuinely thought you went to Thailand. It was a joke. It was like DC Philly in Thailand and he read it completely wrong and just congratulated you on going to Thailand. Okay.

Like the implication is where a sex tour is in vacation. That's correct. Yes. The kind of thing that's probably why he delivered it like that. Yes, he didn't know that. That's what I meant. Or he could have gotten that it was like the joke you were making and that was his choice.

Yes, that's also true. Let's analyze this some more. Chris Hansen is one of our most subtle performers. It's why to catch a predator bears so many rewatches. I get a message from one of my heroes and you get one from one of your worst enemies. Hodgman, you're from Brookline. Yes, that's true. And Nicole, you're from the East Coast, but you spent some time in Boston.

Yep. I think I've been here two or three times. Okay, got it. Yeah. I have no idea where in Boston I've stayed except we passed at Dunkin Donuts and I was like, that one looks familiar to me. But I do like the garment district. It's this like big old thrift store.

Yes. Yeah. I fucking love it. Also, you people are so close. Yeah, there are people who they just have their arms on the stage. This is wild. They have their arms on the stage. I fucking love it.

This venue to me feels like the Galactic Senate from episode one. It's just got these various tears. Episode one of what? Fair question. The Phantom Menace of the First Star Wars. The Star Wars prequel. Yeah. Man, Mike Quincy, friends are going to beat this shit out of you after this.

Well, don't let them. No, I got to let it happen. Raimondi and Scoop wouldn't do that. LD wouldn't participate in that. Wow. You have a lot of them. Well, Mike is Mike. Yeah.

Mike said, yeah, well, I've met Mike a few times. I'm not sure if he remembers meeting me. Can I say that? He's here tonight. Mike is. Jesus. It would be funny if he was sitting there being like, who is Mitch talking to? What the fuck is this person?

Don't be so impressed that he remembered their names. He probably remembers the names of all the bounty hunters from Empire Strikes Back as well. And which episode's that? Five. Five. And IG88. IG88, but that's a gimmie. What are you guys, wait, what?

Of course, IG88, it's a gimmie. You just said a bunch of mush. What did you say? There's one called BOSC, right? BOSC. BOSC. BOSC is good. He's kind of a lizard, right?

Yeah. BOSC is a lizard man. Yeah. Wait, IG88 is the robot bounty hunter from Star Wars Episode 5. Okay. Yeah. Of course, they would say droid, but whatever. It's fine, Nick.

Yeah. I feel like this is this conversation is a microcosm of the internet. Three men explaining Star Wars to a woman. And I'll tell you something. I'm loving it. So Boston, a well-known food city. Hodgman is someone who's... Are you sure?

Isn't it? I don't know. You sound unsure. I've been here a couple of times. I know it's a reputation, but I want to get the opinion of some people who've maybe visited before. Is that okay? Do you think it's a great food city?

Of course, it's the best food city. I love how angry you are in your little hoodie. Of course, it is. Wait, bitch, can I just say I'm really excited about your movie because I can't wait for you to fuck so hard after. Like, you're going to find so much pussy after. I cannot wait. I cannot wait.

Ugh, the girls are going to be lining up around the corner being like, let me fuck that one. We're going to love it. Wait, where's your mom? Right over there. I did promise before this show I was like, I won't talk about dicks and then I haven't. Let the record show for the listener at home. Mike is blushing so hard he's bleeding from his eyes. It's a Joe Biden moment up here.

Ooh, very contemporary, very contemporary. Is this my wine with ice in it? No. It is. Oh, is it? Oh, okay. But the ice melted. I'm sorry.

Oh, boy. You doing all right? Yeah, I had to go to the bathroom before the show started. And I told you to do it. Yeah, we told you to do it. I know everyone told me to do it, but it's fine. Do you still have to go to the bathroom now? Yes, we're using it.

It's good. American runs on Duncan. Spoo Man runs on Dookie. The thing I hate most about that sentence is it's going to end up on a shirt. And I'm already angry. Rightfully so. Everyone in this room has pre-ordered that shirt now. Hodgman, what do you think of Boston as a food city?

Do you have any favorite spots here? They can be individual outlets. They can be small chains. Boston is an interesting city in that it believes that it's a city. I grew up believing that it was a city. I grew up believing that walking down Newbury Street and going to Newbury Comics made me a man of the world. Tower Records was the most incredible place. It was Paris, practically.

It's no longer there, as you know. Boston has always had an incredible food scene when it comes to things like pizza and roast beef. Unpretentious, awesome food. Yes. But then it's also had a very pretentious food scene for a long time, too. That's also true. Of restaurants trying so hard to be like a New York restaurant. And I'm afraid that I was one of those awful children who wanted to go to a New York-style restaurant.

But I didn't appreciate Boston food as it was when I was growing up. Now I do. Now I don't yell at me. I'm back. I'm here. So there have always been very fine restaurants. But the fine dining here has always been a little bit aspirational, I feel like. Whereas the good places have always just been great.

Does that make sense? Yes. I'm bad, though, too. I'm with that guy. Like you said, the Kelly's roast beef was the chain we almost did. Kelly's roast beef, yep. Just the bar pizzas. You can get it with pizzas.

It came out. Pizzas. So we were in line for our chain that we were reviewing earlier, and you walked up with Dano. Shout out to Dano out there. It was a hero tonight. Dano was a hero tonight. And your accent, you have like code switched to Boston so hard. Your accent was coming out so strongly in front of Dano.

It's true. We thought you were a different man. I know. I was like, what's that fucking dux? Thanks for waiting in line. Yeah, it came back. It's the raspy voice. That doesn't help.

I don't think either. I just sound like a scumbag kind of. One of the, one of the few, how long did we wait in line tonight? We were there. An hour and 15 minutes. An hour and 15 minutes. We should not have told you people where we were going. Huge mistake.

I don't think it was just that, but yeah, that didn't help. But yeah, I think from the time Hodgman and I arrived until we were done with the meal was like two hours and 45 minutes. Jesus. It was a quiet, it was quiet. I had a great time. Every minute of it was fantastic. I had a lovely time.

I got to enjoy talking to Doughboy's fans in the line. I was aghast when Nick started bad mouthing them behind their back. Literally, literally behind their backs complaining about their behavior at shows. And then there was one bitch who walked up to the line and was like, you only know there's like eight tables in there. And I was like, bitch, why are you talking to us? She was so fucking rude and like happy to be like, you're waiting for nothing. And I was like, go choke on a dick.

Uh-oh. I said I wouldn't. Welcome. Nicole. Welcome to Boston. A town populated by people who are worried you might be happy. Oh, I liked that. I've never been happy.

What, what do you guys bet you mentioned or bar pizza was mentioned? What are your guys' pizza favorites as we're about to get into to discussing this specific pizza restaurant? Like what, how do you prefer your slice? How do you prefer your pie? We'll start with you. We'll start with Mitch instead of the random person shouting something from the audience. Go ahead, Mitch.

Yeah, maybe we'll start with someone on stage, right? I'm not you people that Nick hates. I'm a classic cheese man, Nick. I like a cheese pizza. That's how I judge most pizzas was the cheese. Right. A large cheese. I like it to be large because I think it tastes better not just because I want more of it.

But I also do want more of it. Uh, but yeah, large cheese pizza. That's, that's to me is that's what that's the test. Got it. Yeah. Nicole favorite, favorite style of pizza, favorite topping combo. I also, I'm a cheese purist. Wow.

And when I order it, I say, can I have extra cheese? Can you put so much that you think it's wrong and then add a little bit more? And I'll put that in the comments on postmates and they'll text me and be like, what? And I'm like, you're feeding a sick woman. I want more cheese. Uh, I also like a white pizza with like, you know, ricotta, basil, mozzarella. And then that shit we had tonight that dip in shit. The Louis sauce.

Or you called it juice and I was like, the fuck? Oh, or Louis juice, Louis juice. It is Louis juice. I like it. That juice is good for me. Yeah. I've got a lot to say when we review that, when we review the chain, I've got a lot to say about the juice. You should have waited.

No, it's fine. I usually, I wake up every morning, I have a glass of Louis juice. It's olive oil and garlic and crushed red pepper. I think it's very good. Yeah. Uh, Hodgman, pizza prefs. Well, you know, I grew up eating New England pizza here in Boston and the chain that we reviewed brought back a lot of feelings and memories. But I like a flat slice.

Uh, I, I like, uh, I like bubbles. I like the crust bubbles. Those are important to me. Oh yeah. Uh, and I, uh, you know, I agree with Mitch that the, uh, a small pizza is not the same as a large pizza. It doesn't have the same. It's, I mean, obviously it's not as large, but as you have pointed out before, the ratio of ingredients is different and it's, and it's wrong somehow. Agreed.

It's not quite, you know, you don't get the field, the, the playing field of cheese and tomato sauce that you need. This may be extreme, but I think they should eliminate all small sizes. Wow. No more small teas. No more small t-shirts. No more small pizzas. Yeah. Medium and above, at least.

Medium and above. Mm-hmm. But I was reminded, however, today of the one small pizza that was actually okay. And it was the one that I was a very good boy. I grew up. I did all my homework. I'm an only child, a member of the Afraid of Conflict Super Smart Narcissist Club. I wanted to follow all the rules.

I would go to the live work line, public library every day after school. And one time I was hungry and I went to Village Pizza and I ordered a small pizza and I snuck it into the library and I ate it all by myself while doing my homework. And it was the greatest pizza I've ever had in my life. I'll be chasing that pizza for the rest of my life. I love that you snuck pizza into a library. Yeah. You know, the reason I remember it so strongly was the feeling of transgression that I had at the time. Right.

I really felt like I was doing something wrong. It seems like the fact that it's contraband is more of a factor than that it's small. I didn't know you couldn't bring food to the library. Right. Whereas I just presumed this must be illegal. To be honest with you, I only use the library for eating. You don't read. I know.

That's what I'm saying. The fact that I was not immediately punished and sent to library jail for this opened a realm of ambiguity in my life that has haunted me ever since. Well, do you take food with you to other places you're not supposed to bring food? Like what? A movie theater. Yeah. I love bringing full meals to the movies. Yeah.

What are you bringing? What's your favorite? I love bringing Taco Bell to the movies. Wow. I like that. And like a full bottle of wine. It is a great time. That's fantastic.

Did you just put all that in a handbag? How do you get it into the theater? Handbag or like a little mini backpack with rhinestones. So they're like, she's playful. Do you match the wine to the movie? Like let's say you're going to go see episode one, the Phantom Menace. What would you bring? Oh boy.

What would I bring to that fun time? Probably a bottle of vodka. And truly black out. I'm just not interested. You know what I don't like? What? I don't like people that bring their own homemade popcorn to the movies. Wow.

You know, if you could get... You're being cheap and stupid. Yes. You have delicious popcorn there. If you could get in trouble for that, I'd rat out every person I saw who did it. Shouldn't be able to bring that stuff in. It's bullshit. Get the buttery delicious popcorn there.

You don't like popcorn, Nick. I don't love popcorn and also like... You say popcorn weird. Yeah. This is... And I feel like we've had this conversation before. We may have. Popcorn.

Popcorn. Which also I think people in Boston might be like, he does say it weird. I don't know if it's... I don't know if it's a Boston thing or what. Right. Yeah. Well, we're here. Is it a Boston thing?

Wow. Okay. Who's to say? You said pizza earlier. That's right. Right. How do you pronounce tuna fish? Tuna fish.

Not only from Boston, but I'm not well read. I didn't ask you to say that because I wanted to humiliate you. It's only that I love the Boston accent so much. And even though I grew up here, I cannot speak in it. And I feel like a human without a country. He's saying Brookline. They said it because of Brookline, but I don't think that's true. Brookline has no accent.

Is that true? It has no personality whatsoever. Interesting. You can sneak a pizza into the library in Brookline. That's a kind of wild town. The Coolidge Corner Movie House still has real butter on their popcorn. Oh, that's cool. That's what I miss.

I guess the pizza place next to the Coolidge now is pretty good. Yeah. And auto pizza across the street from Portland, Maine. But there used to be Alan Tony's. When I worked at the Coolidge, Alan Tony's made a Caesar salad. The most garlicky dressing I've ever tasted. And I think about it probably twice a week. You worked at the Coolidge Movie Theater?

Yeah. Wow. What was your job? Everything. I ripped tickets. I served popcorn. I Windexed the popcorn container. Oh.

Wait, do you clean the inside of it with Windex? Yeah, of course. There was nothing like the smell of hot Windex. I, too, was a movie. I was a movie man. I worked at Braintree Cinema. I worked at Braintree Cinema. Yeah.

Were you in a situation where you had to wear a special vest or something, or a little bow tie? I had to wear a t-shirt with a cartoon popcorn on the back of it. That's cute. And I remember kids from high school. I was a senior right then. I remember kids came to see American Pie 2, and I was like in that t-shirt.

I was like, this sucks. I look like a loser. Well, you know what, Mitch? Now you're a different kind of movie man. Wow, Nick. Whoa. Yeah. Yeah.

Thanks, Nick. Nick, we're both, we come from trained families as well. What? What did you say? What? All right, that is weird. What? What did you say?

Come from trained families. Trained families? Oh, you're going to bring up this anecdote again. My dad worked for the MBTA. Yes. In a building right over there. I love the fact that this crowd worked so hard to muster up a woo for the Red Sox. Like, Nick had said, you know, my opening is going to be a little pandering tonight.

I'm sorry. Mitch, I told you that, like, you should have gone with a different team. You should have gone Celtics or Patriots. You don't think the Red Sox is a generational thing? Well, no, it's just the Red Sox are on television right now. If people want to see the Red Sox, they wouldn't be in this room. Oh, that's a good point. These are podcast nerds who don't care.

That's true. I hope. That's fair. But there was just such more energy in the woo for the MBTA. My dad worked for the MBTA. All right. Now, if you were committed, you would all do a standing ovation right now. Do it again.

Do it again. My dad worked for the MBTA. Wow. I like this is amazing. I like looking into the crowd of the people who are like, I will not. Yeah. Because there was a certain change. No, I see you right down there.

No way. This is the last time I ever listen to this podcast. They're like public transport. No. I wish my dad was here to watch this today, but I was thinking about this a little bit. But I also thought about how fucking confused he'd be. Yes. If I was like, dad, I have a job and he'd be like, I'm so proud of you.

And he's like, what is that job? And I'd be like, I eat fast food and talk about it. And he'd be like, what the fuck? It would be like a Twilight Zone episode for him. Yeah, right. I'm playing the Wilbur and I'm eating fast food, father. He'd be so mad. Love you, dad.

Sorry. Why did you say we both come from train families? You're talking about my great-grandfather? Yeah, your great-grandfather walked in front of a train. Yeah. Yeah, my great-great-grandfather committed suicide by slow moving train while a crowd of onlookers shouted no. Wait, really?

Yes. And you thought that was a nice, fun thing to bring up? We both come from train families. My god, you fucking nightmare. I'll tell you, when Mike Mitchell puts the knife in, you don't see it coming. It's subtle. He does it with a smile, but it goes so deep. It goes deep and it finds your heart and that's the fucking Boston way.

See, that's how you pander to Bostonians, cater to their cruelty. So Regina Pizzeria has been around since 1920. Been around since 1926. We hit up the location that Mitch insisted on with good reason, the original North End location. That's right. And your buddy, Dano, who I consider a buddy, came along. No, you don't get to say that.

All right, fine. Your friend only, Dano, who I've seen a few times, came along. And so we mentioned that we had a lengthy wait with some, we talked to a number of fans and it was a lovely experience. And then we got in there. We had a table for five. You and Dano went on an errand that was show related. You returned about 45 minutes later.

We got inside there and we sat down in a booth for five. That's right. And we had, I guess let's just get into our order. I mean, who's had this before? And Hodgman, I know you've had it before. Nicole, you've never had it. Never in my life. I've had it once.

And the Pizzeria Regina that I had growing up was more suburban. I think that I have been to the one in the North end, but mostly I was getting it like when we would come in to go to, you know, Quincy Market, Faneuil Hall or getting it from Allston or something like that. Yeah. By the way, who says it Regina Pizzeria, who says it Regina Pizzeria, hashtag the right way? Who says, who says it Pizzeria Regina, hashtag the Boston way? Yeah, baby.

There you go. I never knew until tonight that it was Regina Pizzeria. That's its official name. The website is Regina Pizzeria. Who's going to tell them they're wrong? Yeah, exactly. Wait, why does it fucking matter? Shh, quiet.

They can't hear that. Matters a lot. I miss two words. You just say them how you feel. Oh, it's good content. Okay. All right. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. He told me that my intro would be on the napkin. And the napkin has a lot of facts about Regina Pizzeria. I just pulled one out of my back pocket here since 1926. Stretched, by the way. What? The napkin's drenched. Suggesting I soiled myself.

Wait a minute. He can't soil himself. He's a computer. You can't have it both ways. I'm sorry. Get your bit straight. Let's see. Yeah, so they just have a bunch of different information on here.

They talk about the four generations of the family that have been running it. They talk about the crust, the sauce, the cheese, and the toppings. Could you do this any more disrespectfully? They say some bullshit about this family restaurant's been around for a while. I guess people like this. Anyway, yeah, fucking whatever. I sense here official pizza in the red socks. I'm a Papa Geno's guy.

Remember by reading off my shirt. So a lot of information there. We sat down and our server did a great job. And we ordered, let's just get into it. Mitch, you're a cheese man. We got a 16-inch cheese pizza. We got a 16-inch pizza with... I don't know why I'm saying it's 16-inch.

Large. Yeah. It says 16-inch on the receipt. I'm reading the itemized receipt. I like hearing inches. Okay, fine. Not my favorite topic. We got a 16-inch with pepperoni and white onions.

And this was... How did you order it, Mitch? Well done. Well done. Oh, I shouldn't give out my home address. Well, see you on the... everybody. I guess let's just start there and then we can get into these specialty pizzas a little bit.

What did you guys... Mitch, this is your favorite order. This is your go-to order. The cheese pizza and then the pepperoni with onions, well done. Yes. It's delicious. Yeah, I think it's a great example of what that place does.

So, yeah, I think it's great. I think it's an A-plus pizza. What do you love about it? I don't know. It tastes great. Got it. At what point did this become... Hang on.

Mitch. Uh-huh. We're here in Boston, your hometown, Quincy, specifically. We're not in Quincy, but you know what I mean. We're talking about your favorite pizza in the world. Your profession is doing a podcast about... That's right. ...chain restaurants.

Like, when Nick emailed me saying, do you want to come up and do the Wilbur and do Boston, that was an automatic yes, because I love you guys. And then when I learned that it was Pizzeria Regina, I was like, oh, this is the one. This is the thing that it's all been building up towards. Yes. Right?

Friend of your podcast, Griffin Newman, cohost of Blank Check, is a big fan of your podcast. Oh, yeah. Great guy. Text me on the chain saying, you're in Boston tonight? I'm like, yeah. And he said, what are you reviewing? I said, Pizzeria Regina.

He said, I don't know if I could handle that weight, man. Wow. He could. Yeah. I'll remind you that your mother is here. And other family members. And my oldest friend, Damon Graff, is in the wings. That's right.

We met when we were three years old when I moved to Brookline. Three years old, right? Yeah. That's right. So when we ask you to say what you like about Pizzeria Regina, this punchline that you've been building up to for 200 episodes, 200, 200 some odd episodes, may I, as your friend and supporter, ask you to dig a little bit deeper, then it tastes good.

I'll elaborate. It's fantastic. Fair, fair enough. Look, it's the crust. The dough is fresh. It bubbles up. Yes. You got the bubbles in some part.

Yes. It's the oven, the brick oven. I don't know. It's an oven. Yeah. It's a brick oven. There is an oven. I'm sure of it.

It's a pizza oven. Is it wood fire? Wood fire? It's wood. Or coal fire. Nick, where did that napkin go? You told us, speaking of the ovens, you told us a rumor that was so clearly bullshit,

but you were worried it might be true. Tell us what your friend told you about the ovens. It wasn't my friend. It was my friend's dad. It's one of my best friends ever, Justin Kiley. Hi, Justin. His dad told me that it was a Nazi oven. Which is so funny that someone in Boston was like,

they burn well. We should get them. What, was that too soon? That was a good joke. Wow. Such an obvious, my uncle works at Nintendo Tier Lie, that you were honestly, you were like, I don't want to tell you guys this,

because it might be true. You're so worried about it. I was scared. When were you told this? Recently. I thought this was going to be like as a child. No, I think it was within this year. Justin.

Justin, was it this year? No. Hey. Hey, Justin. What's up, Kiley? How you doing? My father, he took my father back from the oven and had an apple fork for him.

Wow. Wait. Let the record show. I didn't want this news to get out. Let the record show, if you couldn't hear it, I have not met Justin, and I fear him. He's a great guy. He seems like a great guy.

I just need to highlight that he said, he pronounced swastika, swastika. I love Justin. Also, that's your best friend. He's all the way up there. You're a fucked up friend. I didn't get him down here. You fucked up.

I apologized to him. He did say he was in nosebleeds. I said, sorry. He says, no problem. Go get him. Yeah. Justin's amazing. I hope you understand and don't murder me.

There's a little known thing about the Boston accent, which is ending words that end with an A and giving them a little R on the turn at the end, like tuna fish. Yeah. That's all. Oh, swastika or something. Swastika is what I heard.

It also, in different countries, that can mean a different thing. I don't think it's, I don't think it. Oh, no. Oh, Mitch. Oh, no. You didn't have to go down this road. No, you were right.

Well, actually, the swastika was not originally a Nazi symbol. Thank you, Nicole. And I believe it originated in India. I'm not completely sure. Someone said, yes, you are correct. Thank you. And look, you're the only people who will ever hear this. You saw Emma, you edit this shit out.

You song gave me the thumbs up. Thank you. Yeah, you can edit my joke. You song and Emma. Yeah, they didn't like it. Yeah. Make a, edit it out and then send me the tape so I can send it to Dave Matthews.

Oh, God. I don't know what you said. I don't want to know. This is how Boomer Facebook memes get started. Some baseless rumor. Yeah. Also, I heard the Pizzeria Regina has a child trafficking ring in the basement.

Jeffrey Epstein was at a table with IG88 and BOSC. I will, I will give my thoughts and, and, and on the cheese pizza. Wow. Your favorite owner at comic ping pong. All right. Come on. Cheese.

I, I, I, you know, cheese pizza is not my favorite. I usually like some toppings, although good cheese is a good baseline for evaluating a pizza, a place's quality. I had the cheese pizza once before when we went to Pizzeria Regina. I think it would have been more of a reveal if this was the first time I'd had it, but I understand

that this is a place you're very protective of. You wanted me to have multiple experiences. So you took me on a prior occasion when we were reviewing the chain. What are you doing? This cheese pizza, the slice you personally selected for me to have. This is true.

That was the best slice of cheese pizza I've ever eaten. Oh my God. I'm going to tear up. That's all I ever wanted from this podcast. Really? It was, it's delicious. Every observation you made is correct.

Yeah. The, the, the abortion Jesus is great. I love that it has a little char to it. Yeah. It's got like the, the great amount of dough. It's like thin, but not too thin. And like the little bit of crust you, you, you, you dip it in that Louis sauce.

It's a wonderful way to finish out your slice. Yeah. It's, it's great. The cheese pizza there is great. It's greasy, but not too greasy. Greasy, but not too greasy. Absolutely. And I, and I think that, that pepperoni with white onions,

you know, not the combo I would get, but they're, they cook. I'm saying trying your order. I, I think this was a, this was a very good execution of that. And I, and I think that, that, you know, the, uh, loaded with pepperoni, they're not skipping on the pep, which I, which I very much appreciate it. No way. Um, so yeah, both those, both those pizzas I thought were,

were dynamite. Um, Hodgeman, Nicole, any thoughts on those two, uh, those two large pizzas? Would you like to go first? Sure. I mean, yes. All right. Here's what I'll, here's, here's what I'm going to say.

We have not brought up the other small pizzas that we got, which was a vegetarian spit. I was using that. Oh, I'm sorry. You're using this as a reference. I changed tab to get the descriptions. You, you had, we got a vegetarian, uh, which is the prima, vegetarian primavera.

Which is mozzarella, mushrooms, pepper, onions, black olives, fresh basil, marinated tomatoes and artichoke hearts. We also got a white, uh, uh, uh, excuse me, a white pizza for cheese, Bianco pizza. And then the jambotta, that was me. I got the jambotta. And yeah, do you want to read the jambotta description?

Right. Well, it's pepperoni, Regina sausage, salami, mushrooms, peppers, onions, fresh basil, mozzarella cheese, anchovies upon request. I did request. They call it their finest creation. And those three small pizzas, and it may simply be the curse of the small pizza, underwhelmed me.

Yeah. Yes, I agree. They were overloaded with things. It was my fault because I ordered this jambotta, which is like, let's throw everything on there. And it was a little bit soggy. It was delicious, but it was just, it was underwhelming. Yeah.

And it sometimes happens with that veggie heavy pizza, is that it just like, it gets the moisture. Just soggy. Yeah, exactly. And too much. Oh God. I'm sweating. Do you have to shit?

Now, I, we begged you to go to the bathroom before the show. And now I feel it's like Chekhov's gun. You have to go off before the show ends. Because you are loaded. What a nightmare to sit in a toilet in front of everyone, my family and friends in my hometown. Just sit in a toilet in the center of the stage. I think I could do it.

Your mom is already in the wings watching you. You might as well bring this to full nightmarish fruition. You think you could do it, by the way? Yeah, I think it'd be all right. With everyone watching you? I'd be a little embarrassed, but I could, if I had to do it, like I could do it. I wouldn't want to.

It wouldn't be my preference. To take a shit in front of friends and family, I would do it. Yeah, I think I could do it. No questions asked. If I'd even have to go, I'd say, you want to watch? Yeah, that's a good time. Nicole, your pizza thoughts,

and we can open it up to everything at this point. I thought the cheese pizza was probably one of the best slices of cheese pizza that I've had. It was so fucking good. The dough was great. There was like a crunch to it. There was like enough cheese that I was satisfied, but it wasn't super overwhelming.

I did love that fucking juice. That was good. The Louis juice was great. The Louis juice was good, and then there was a fucking ladle of other juice. That's like olive oil and hot pepper that comes on almost every table. That was so good.

And then I don't usually go for onions on pizza, but I was like, let's fucking do it. And it was good. I liked it. It was a really great combination. I agree. The little pizzas, I think they were trying to do a little too much

on the little pizzas. Maybe if they were large, they would have been better, but it did feel super overwhelming, but the Formaggio Blanquillo. The white pizza, yeah. What's it really called? Was I close? You were close, yeah.

I think you basically got it. Formaggio Blanquillo? Oh, now you can't find the tab. I closed the tab. Why did I do that? You were so quick to go to the tab before. Why did you close the tab? I don't know.

Oh, it's okay. Hold on. You can read on the itemizer's receipt. It's the Four Cheese Bianco. Oh, okay. I thought that one was really good. I love that one. I love the size.

I didn't taste your vegetable one because mushrooms are not for me, and then I didn't taste the anchovy one because anchovies are the devil. Too salty for not a good time. Anchovies are obviously a dividing point for people. Yes, some people, most people know. But I think anchovy cooked into a pizza

is the greatest flavor I've ever had in my mouth. Wow. Really? The greatest flavor you've ever had in your mouth? In pizza and food terms. Well, I mean, I'm talking about food terms. Yeah, all right. Who out there likes anchovies?

Hashtag canchovy. What the hell? I'm floored. Me too. This is insane to me. Yes. I don't know my Boston people. This is fucked up.

I will say that I agree. You were right to pass up that veggie one because it was the least good of... It's the one I ordered, I'll admit it, and it was the least good of the pizzas. I like the white pizza quite a bit. I like the Bianco. I thought that was very good.

And the anchovies work... I mean, I'm an anchovy fan. I'll take them. I like how salty they are. I like how fishy they are. Thank you, Double Reed. I'm so glad to be on Team Anchovy with you. Hashtag canchovy.

Amen. Are anchovies... What's the anti-anchovy? Can't chovy or can the anchovy? Oh, boy. Can-no-vee? Oh, Jesus Christ. That was not an option.

I like canchovy. I grew up eating pizzeria regina. I have a very deep fond memory of it. My memory of it was that the sauce was a very deep red color. And there was almost a perfect balance of cheese and flecks of burnt material and bubblyness and this flat, beautiful field. And I've thought about it many, many times.

It's been years since I've had it. Now, I'll say that this original location, which I flashed memory to going to when I was a little kid, this pizza, which is the authentic original place, is a little bit different than the sort of suburban places where I've gotten it. I used to go to the South Shore Plaza. It was the one I used to go to a bunch when I was younger. It used to have a sit-down restaurant at one point with an oven and everything.

Well, I mean, they always have ovens. Fuck. Was the quality of the pizza different? It was good. No, that one was good when it was like the actual sit-down restaurant. It was good. And then I went to the food court. The good ones have the Nazi ovens. Oh, God. I will say that even though these pizzas at this original location

were a little bit lumpier, a little bit more misshapen, a little bit more authentic and wood-fired than what I remembered, that sauce has a very distinct flavor profile. It's deep. It's complex. It's fruity that I've not tasted anywhere else before or since. Wow. It brought me right back to childhood and sent me straight forward to the future because nostalgia is a toxic impulse.

And I thought everything was in perfect balance. And I will also say that their condiments are impeccable. They have the garlic, the oregano, the salt, the pepper, which is really important to me on a pizza. It's not for everyone, but I really love black pepper on a pizza. All on the table. You don't have to go up to a counter to get things and share with anybody else. They bring, as you pointed out, Nicole, this enormous carafe of olive oil

infused with hot chili peppers, which is amazing. So fucking good. And then, off the menu, you order the louis juice, which sounds pornographic, but is what was so strange about it to me. Weigher got some to go before he knew what it was. Can you fill up my big gulp, please? Give it to me direct from the source. Louie's here.

Is this the real Louie or a stand-in Louie? I can tell the difference, believe me. But this was, as you say, olive oil and garlic and oregano infused in little plastic cups, but it was more than that. And when you had that to dip the crust into, it was a spectacular experience. You've calmed my nerves quite a bit. And I will say this. I cannot, in good conscience, say that the slice of cheese pizza, while exemplary,

was the best slice of cheese pizza I've ever had. Wow. Well, where is the best slice you've ever had? Brookline Public Library, 1986. Fair enough. But I will say, without reservation, that the pepperoni and white onion pizza well done is the best slice of pizza I've ever had in my life. Wow.

Wow. And I am not, I am not pandering to you or Boston, even though I'm better at it than me. I made a note of it. I said pepperoni and onion among the greatest slices. I changed it out. The best slice. It was, the company could not have been greater. And Dano too.

Oh my God. Dano was a prince. Dano left. Dano left before the pizzas game. Dano left because we had, we've had, we've had a crazy whirlwind. And I'll let you finish your thoughts, husband. But we had a crazy whirlwind and we ended up with the, Mitch had the, you had all the merch that we were selling tonight in Dano's car.

Dano left to take them, didn't have a slice of pizza to take the merch to the venue. That's right. So that it would be here in time while we sat there and ate pizza. That's right. But before Dano left, he said, do one thing for me, take a couple of pepperonis, wrap them up in some leftover crust, run them through the spicy oil and enjoy that for me. And I did it. And it's the best sandwich I've ever had.

Wow. It was amazing. Dano, you're a hero. He is. He's great. Also, can we just talk about how you were packing up the pizza? Yeah, this became a point of contention at the end. Oh boy.

I just didn't understand why you were trying to stack them on top of each other. And you were letting all them touch. You were touching all the ones that didn't need to be touched. You said that wasn't the problem. You were throwing crust everywhere. It was so wild. I couldn't believe it. So I've never met, I'm a big fan of Nicole's from the podcast and her own comedy.

Also, I have a book called Medallion Status coming out October 15th. But we had never met, even though I'm a fan, we had never met before. You don't have to yell it again. I acknowledged you. No one just yelled nailed it. Truly, if you feel it, I'll hear it. It is the bane of my existence. I don't understand why people yell it at me.

I was fucking there. You, sir, are my enemy. I fucking hate you. Guess what? You yelled nailed it, but you screwed it. So it's just a little handyman humor. We've never, but though I am a fan, we had never met before. And I feel like we had a real moment of connection and clarity about who we were.

As the evening drew to a close and we ordered more pizza than we could possibly stomach. We ordered five pizzas. And what I saw was five pizza trays with about a third of a pizza on each. And then each one rounded out by dead skeletons of crusts. And I was like, this cannot stand. We have to separate these crusts from these pizzas immediately. We need to get everything together, organized and cataloged as soon as possible, because this is chaos and I cannot handle it.

So I'm like, let me get all of these uneaten pizzas onto this tray and get all of these uneaten crusts off to this tray. And I was following my own psychosis. And as I was doing it, I didn't realize I was triggering your psychosis. Yes, because you laid one slice on top of another slice. And I was like, the slices can't mix. Separate but equal. You know, they cannot be together like that.

It's not right. But that was my last, Nicole, that was my last maneuver. I know. I don't want you to say that I was playing pizza Jenga out there. You weren't. It truly was that last one. I was nestling them in carefully. I was trying very hard to recreate a whole pizza.

And there was one left over and I put it on top of another slice. I didn't feel great about it. But you did it. I have a confession. I too was mad. Internally, I just want her as you did it. And then I was like, he's our guest. He came here to do this show for us as a favor.

Don't yell at him about the pizza. I felt crazy when I was like, stop it. And you didn't stick up for me being crazy. You should have said me too, Nicole. Me too. I would have been like, oh, it's fat people. You left her in the wind. But now we know, what time is it?

11.13. So now we know that the half life on Mitch's anger, the expression of the greatest offense he can possibly imagine, is treating Regina's pizza is about five hours. He will hold it in just like his own poop for five hours, rather than take care of himself and get it out. I'm so sorry to both of you. I apologize.

It's OK. Thank you. I don't know if I accept your apology. Come on, you can't. Oh, I do. I accept your apology. That was so easy. I wasn't really paying attention to what was happening with that

situation, but I'm with Hodgman. Do you stack pizza on top of pizza? But then it gets in the refrigerator, and then it's stuck together. And then what happens? Oh, yeah. No, I'm not. No. Yeah, you can't.

OK. But that was the last, I don't want to go revisit this, but that was, you were mad from the beginning, and what were you mad at specifically? What did I do wrong? Because I don't do this again because I like you. Wow. Wow.

Do you want to know really what my issue was? Is that I didn't want anyone touching the pizza. I want it myself. It was a territory thing strictly. Right. I went to like a Bulldog mode. Right. I was moving into ownership mode.

Yes. Like, I'll decide how to arrange this pizza, and you're like, that's mine. Yes. That's exactly what it was. That's fine. And then you did put it on top of another slice of pizza. I got very mad at that.

Yeah, yeah. And you know, that pizza's backstage, and you can eat it tonight, and when you do, you'll know I touched every one of those. Guys, we got to get to our final thoughts on Regina Pizzeria. Pizzeria Regina, excuse me. So let's go down the line. We'll start with you, Hodgman.

You've been very colorful in your description of your experience. Let us know your closing argument, and give us your fork scores. You wrote a five forks. You're up, Hodgman. Oh, God. Well, I don't... I mean, I may have put the cart before the horse

in saying that the pepperoni and onion slice was the greatest piece of pizza I've had in my life, but I stand by it, and I don't know... Wow. I don't know how I could give it less than five forks. Wow! Wow! Nicole Bayer.

I had a wonderful time. I didn't mind waiting the amount of time I waited because the food was fucking worth it. I'm going to give it ten forks. I really fucking loved it. Yeah, it was great. It's the best pizza that I've had that's, like, not deep dish. It was so fucking good.

Wow. I will allow it. Oh, yay! Mike Mitchell to the spoon. I think we know what you're going to say, but please give us your thoughts on Pizzeria Regina. Yeah, remember that this is for posterity, that this is a chance for you to express yourself.

There's an old nursery rhyme. Okay. I love where this is going. Pizza, pizza, pizza pie. If you eat it, you will die. If you die, I will cry. Pizza, pizza, pizza pie. If I were to die after that slice of pizza,

I'd be the happiest man alive. Wow. And I would cry. And you would cry. Wait, is that a real nursery rhyme? It's a real... Welcome to Boston. Everyone's favorite food as a kid.

Pizza, pizza, you're going to die. Like, Boston's fucked up. I like it. And it's obviously not because we're worried about obesity. It's mostly that we're worried about people having pleasure. We got new 2XL and XL shirts. They were gone instantly, I heard. Yeah.

Still plenty of smalls and mediums available, so... Pizza Ria Regina, it's just a staple. It's been around for almost 100 years. The ingredients in the pizza represent the best in the city of Boston. And I know a lot of people give shit to this city, and I love this city. And I think that the pizza represents the people. It's five forks for me. Wow.

That's easy to say. I'm not pandering. It's the best pizza I've ever eaten in my entire life. It's not a lie. And I've eaten a lot of pizza, Nick, as you know. Right. That's the... That's the best...

We all know. What you just said was the best pizza Ria Regina napkin I've ever read. All right, Nick, you're up. You can ruin this if you want. As I mentioned, it was a three-hour experience from when we arrived to when we were done. It's their fault. It's not just... It was just Doe Boyz fans.

Yes, it was. You already don't like them. I liked... I like our fans. I don't understand them. But I like them. Shout out to John and Stephanie who offered to let us cut, but we could not do it. That's right.

They're... Cut. Yes. They're line companions, one of whom was a big fan of Nicole's podcast, called Why... Why Won't You Do Me? Thank you. We did not cut. I was proud of that.

We didn't cut. No, we waited. And it was a lengthy experience. And was it worth it? That's what I'm weighing. The vacuum, no. But this place is important to my friend, Mitch. And John Hodgman said, I like you, Mitch, I love you.

Wait. To share this experience with you. Am I truly sick? What's happening? You're reviewing your favorite pizzeria because you about to die. You're in a movie, Mitch. You got cast in a movie. This is...

We have a big show for you here in Boston. The way this should end is we should crossfade now to Mitch in the booth at Pizzeria Regina with ambulance lights flashing on his face. As he dies from a heart attack. This is his finest like the end of Brazil. This is your fantasy. You got cast in a Chris Pratt movie and Nick loves you. Also, I couldn't...

I couldn't make eye contact when I said I love you, so I so clearly have work to do on myself. But that's not beside the point. I was going to say this. This place is important to you. We went a couple of times. The first time we went, I loved it. And I didn't tell anyone what I thought. I didn't really even tell you.

You acted normally. But I acted normally. And this visit, I loved it. It's delicious. It's great. In the interest of this podcast, I would like to visit another location and see how it stacks up as a chain. But for the purposes of this tour, we've been going to one location and evaluating the food at that place as a representation of the chain as a whole.

And as far as Pizzeria Regina's food that was presented to us tonight, as far as this pizza stacks up amongst the other chain food we've had. Welcome to the Platinum Plate Club, Regina Pizzeria. Wow! Five-fourths! Wow! Wow! I was wearing it the whole time.

Mitch took off his Belichick hoodie to reveal Regina Pizzeria t-shirt. It should say Platinum Plate Club. That would have been cool. Instead, there's just titty sweat. By the way, everyone's saying I didn't know it's Pizzeria Regina. There's no titty sweat. Oh, there's not. No.

Well, red is a good color to disguise that because you are soaking. It says the chain's name in the right order on the t-shirt. It says Regina Pizzeria. Oh, someone gave it to me. I wore it. It's fine. Guys, that was our review of Regina Pizzeria. It's time for a segment.

We've got a food stuff and a beverage, and we're going to decide if you should put it in your mouth and or pour it down your throat. It's drank or stank or snack or whack. You, Song and Emma, bring in this stuff out. Wow. Mitch, you and the great Dano procured all of this for us in advance of the show. That's right. Let us know what we're about to be tasting.

We've got two things here. One, from basically the last Brigham's, the ice cream powder and Quincy. I bought three raspberry lime Rickies and I poured them into this weird thermos that my mom found in the basement. Wait, what is a Ricky? Don't know. We should put ice in it first. And then also me and Dano went, this is a big competition between these two places.

Modern pastry and Mike's pastry. The two sides. We're going to say which one's better. Modern. A lot of people say modern. Another thing about this raspberry lime Ricky, I asked Dieter. Dieter works at the ice cream parlor. Shout out to Dieter.

I said Dieter. I said, I'm going to put this in a thermos and we're going to drink it later on stage. I said, if I add just a little soda water to it, will that be okay? And he said, oh no. He said, it's going to taste awful. And he said, it will be flat and it won't taste good, but that will be for us to decide. This looks to me as Nicole is pouring it out of this thermos that you brought into these red solo cups.

It looks completely melted. It's not ice cream. It's a drink. Isn't it kind of a granita? No. It's a drink. Okay. A lime Ricky is a combination of fresh lime juice, soda, water, and sugar.

And then raspberry, it's a raspberry syrup or raspberry flavor that's added. I remember having this at Brigham's when I was a kid. Am I putting club soda in these? I think you can taste it and then if you think you need to add club soda, you can. Is it not currently carbonated? I washed it myself. I took it in the shower with me. Now you say this was from your basement?

This is, the thermos is from my basement. Right. The raspberry lime Ricky, I got at ice cream parlor. I put it in this thermos. It sat in Daniel's car for the last six hours. It's possible that these spider eggs are not part of the original Brigham's recipe. Let me tell you. Yeah.

I think it's damn good. Yeah. It's supposed to have a little effervescence. That's what you're saying. That's right. If you add a little soda water to it. Oh yeah. When you add soda water, that's pretty tasty.

Can I have a little Pellegrino? I'm going to try that. Try to plus mine up. No, thank you. All right. Thank you. All right. Here we go.

I think I understand what it's supposed to taste like. It's like, it's like a, it's a. It's like a Shirley Temple. Yes, exactly. I feel like my Shirley Temple's with vodka. It's a good drink. Yeah. I don't know if this is a thing that I would ever order.

Because I'm just like, if I'm going to have this much sugar, give it to me in cream form. But. What? I don't, I don't have as much. I don't, I try to limit my sugar intake because I'd be even fatter than I already am if I had it. I had terrible sweet tooth. So I don't have a lot of sweet beverages.

If I was going to go to a dessert place, an ice cream parlor, I'm a creamsman. I'd have some ice cream. I wouldn't have, I wouldn't have this, this, this drink. But I think, I think it's good. I'm going to give it a drink. I'm giving it a drink as well. Nick, I got news for you. You got your cream coming to you right now.

Hell yeah. There you go. This first one is modern pastry. I'm giving it a drink as well. Nicole, you were saying stank for the raspberry lime Ricky. No, I liked it after I added the club soda. Because then I was like, oh, that's what it's supposed to taste like. It does help a little bit.

I like it. Yeah, that's how, that's how it would be served. It's not traditional to have a raspberry lime Ricky that's been stored in a car. Yes, yes. I get it. But yeah, I think it's a fun summertime beverage. And I usually travel with vodka. So like I would probably add the vodka to it myself.

Thank you. But you, so you were saying you prefer a Shirley Temple full of vodka. Yes. Yeah, that's an extreme as well. Ah. Oh, no. That took me a hot second, but wow. That was good.

I like you. I like you too. We've got these modern pastry cannolis. That's what we're eating. Macata cannolis plain. We're doing plain versus plain. Okay. I'm going to have a bite of this plain guy.

John, can you hand me that box as well? Mike's pastry. Yes, please. Thank you. Oh, it's heavy. What? What? I think Mitch's Quincy Crew.

Dana was drinking something for the last couple of hours? Dana was drinking the lime Ricky for the last couple of hours? Rock bottom. Rock bottom? Say something that makes sense. I've tasted the modern pastry. Is it weird for me to hand the leavings of this to someone in the crowd? Does someone want to bite from the other end?

The leavings? I'm going to give it to this guy. This enthusiastic person. This one's fucking fat. All right. I've tasted them both. All right. Time for Mike's pastry.

So to differentiate between these two, the smaller one is the modern. That's right. Right. And the fatter one is the Mike's pastry. The Mike's. Mike's has some girth. Yeah. All right.

Unlike Mike Mitchell. Yeah. Your mother's learning so much. Jesus Christ. I'd say the other difference is this one has more of a cheesy sort of character to it. Yes. Yeah, I think so. The cream is a little different.

Yeah. I have a vote. My vote's in. Yes. Modern pastry wins for me. They're both good though. They're both good. But yeah, I think I'm going to go with the single cam mockumentary style pastry, modern

pastry. I think that's the one that's better. I don't know. I like Mike's hog. This one's great. I think Mike's, like it's fatter. It's more fun to put in my mouth. I think the consistency's a little bit better on the cream.

And then I like that they're, it's like the, what is this, the encasin? Yeah. The encasement is thicker. I like this one. This one's for me. Fair enough. I say, leave the gun and take the cannoli. Nicole, that's a reference to the movie The Godfather.

And I revealed earlier, I've never seen it. I've never seen it. I've never seen anyone's favorite movie. I would like, I would like to say that when you said I've not seen The Godfather, you noticed that I did not say, whoa. It was very kind. I know. It's fine if you don't see The Godfather.

It's fine if you've never seen The Godfather. Thank you. That's nice. Thank you. Don't let the dudes in your life shame you. It's fine. I got cream on my mic cord over here. Sure.

The modern, modern cannoli is better than the mic. Really? Wow. But we like, it's just a better proportion. Yes, I think so. And it's, they're both delicious, but the modern cannoli is a better balance of cream and what we call encasing in the Italian-American community. What's it called?

What is this called? What's this? The shell? The shell, okay. All right. All right. Okay. A shell!

Okay, I got it. All you people screaming shell, waiting for your moment, we've tried to do a lot up here. What? Mike's for tourists. Mike's for tourists. Okay. All right. Wow.

How rude. I think it's good. What? Sorry, everyone's getting angry. Everyone's really mad that I like Mike's. You guys were doing- I like Mike's fat fucking cannoli! Oh my God.

I got more of that in my mouth than I thought. We prefer different ones, but I say snacks all around. I liked all of these. Snacks all around. Yeah, these are all very, very good. I disagree. Modern or nothing. Wow.

Wow. But yes, they're all very delicious. Yes. Guys, that was some local Boston treats. I was going to tell you. For a drink or snack or a whack. Yeah. Mike's freezes their shells.

Do they really? Good. Keep some fucking fresh. God, do what you gotta do. So guys, we're going to do our live feed bag. And here's how this will work. We have three of you guys that we've picked from some pre-screened questions for the Q&A. And I believe there's a microphone in the aisle.

Is that correct, you song? Yeah. So Emma is there. I got it. So if your name is called, go down to Emma. And we know some of you guys may be on the balcony that may be a little bit of a problem. You have to jump off. If that's okay.

You have to jump off. But whoever is in whatever order you get down there, we'll just handle these questions or whatever array you arrive. John Joe, Emily Ritter's house, and Sean Perota. Please line up in the aisle over there where Emma has the spotlight on her. I just have to say whoever yelled out Bova's bakery, you know what the fuck is up. Wow. Wow.

Emma spittin' heat. All right. Emma, don't encourage the heckling, please. All right. We got Emily Ritter's house. Ritter's house? Emily Ritter's house. Okay.

Wait, I need to pull it up because I forgot what I said. You forgot your question? That's okay. Okay. Hi. Hello. Hi, Emily. Okay.

So I was asked this in an interview one time, a job interview. If you could describe yourself slash identify with one food, what would that be? Wow. I hope you walked out of that interview. I didn't get the job. Also, what was that an interview for? It was for fundraising for my college. Wow.

Wow. Jesus. What a bad question. I agree. I think that might constitute assault, frankly. That sounds like harassment to me. I had that job that I worked selling in college. I worked selling like alumni memberships, which is a similar sort of thing.

What the fuck? What on earth? You said a bunch of words that she knew. Bizarre reaction. It's like Red Sox, Red Sox, Red Sox. It's like university development. That job is an annoying job. Whether you got it or not, I'm sure it was unpleasant.

It's a food that we identify with boy. I got one. Yes. Go ahead, Mitch. He's human-like, first of all. I had similar skin in high school. Pizza the Hut is my answer. And you'll also eat yourself to death.

This is tough, but I feel like my answer is a food that I consume perhaps more frequently than any other. Manez is a good guess. Honestly, that's the funniest thing anyone has shown me. That was pretty fucking funny. Manez! Good job. This is...

It's a fruit that has a shell that you can peel back and there's something a little sweet inside. A banana. That's my answer. What? A banana. And it's nutritious and it's efficient. Is it because of the phallic reasons?

I wasn't thinking that, but sure. Jesus. Any answers from Hodgman or Nicole? I'd probably be bacon because I'm fat but delicious. You know? Bacon. I don't know that I... It's hard for me to think of an eye food that I identify with,

but when the person shouted out, Manez, I immediately wanted some. Manez and I realized that is a very important food for me and has been throughout my life. Wait, is this a bit? Because white people seem to fucking love Manez. Sure. Like, y'all have salads built around Manez

and that's wild. Yeah, we have like a tuna fish salad, for example. I love Manez so much. I love mayo. When I was maybe 10 or 11, I was in the kitchen making a snack for myself and I said to my mom, who is no longer alive, who was in the other room, I said,

I think I'd like to have a bowl of Manez. And she said, don't do that. And because I'm a good boy, I didn't. But now my mom's dead. Yeah! Fuck that bitch! Scoop up Manez! I'm kidding, my mom's dead too.

No, that was the joke I was making as well. Okay, great. I just got distracted. I was thinking about having a bowl of Manez. I've not yet had a bowl of Manez. What would you put in it? Like, pickles? No, the Manez in the bowl with a spoon.

Sorry, I didn't know if you wanted to spice it up. Would you draw a mustache on the Mona Lisa? You got a bowl of mayo. I mean, there are very few things that give me a more sense that everything is right in the world than opening a fresh jar of Manez. Oh, my God. Dear God.

That's insane. You keep Manez in your house? Yeah. Multiple jars, multiple brands. I've never bought a jar of Manez. I too have multiple brands of Manez in my place. What are you rocking? Do you have multiple jars of Manez?

You know I have zero groceries in my fridge. I got a classic Best Foods, because I do have some nostalgic connection for that. Which is Hellman's West of the Mississippi. Yes, absolutely. Hellman's out here. We've got a Trader Joe's mayo. And then we've also got,

I'm forgetting the brand right now, Sir Kensington Mayo, which is a nice mayo. What is that? That is the whitest name for Manez. Sir Kensington Mayo. Yeah, but that's a meta thing, because they know how white they are. Right.

Like, that's a bespoke Manez, that they started making five years ago. And it's got a guy with a monocle on the label. I'm rocking Hellman's, and it just got from my father-in-law, three jars of Duke's Manez, which is a southern mayo. Oh, wow.

Hold on a second. This is really good. You were gifted jars of mayo? My daddy-in-law knows what I like. I too am confused, Nicole. Yes, thank you. This is wild. And you're gonna just tear through all three of those three jars?

Yeah, as soon as I get home tomorrow. Mitch is acting confused, like, that mayo isn't what's in his soda cup that's on the table. Thank you for the question, Emily. I beg your pardon, it's ranch dressing. Okay, I got Sean Pirata. Hi, Sean. What's up, Sean?

Hey, Sean, are you related to Tom Pirata? I am. He's my cousin. Holy shit. He's my cousin. Oh, my god. The leftovers, little children, big fans. He's one of my...

He was a writing teacher of mine, and a dear friend, an amazing writer. Yeah, that's a bit, yeah. Are you related to any Baratas from New Jersey? I'm... Yeah. Well, Thomas... Really?

Wait, I am from Cranford, New Jersey. I'm from Cranford, New Jersey. He's from... Yeah, he's from Garwood, New Jersey. Oh, well, I'm from Middletown, New Jersey, and my algebra teacher was Meezie's Barata. Nope. No.

I have a question. Yeah. Do you have a ball of Barata I could have? I wish, man. It's the best. What's your question, Sean? Yeah. I'm here for my bachelor party.

What? Congratulations. Yeah, no, I know. It's sad. I get it. This is the traditional way to end a bachelor party. Yeah, for sure. And I was just wondering, what are some of your guys' favorite,

like, wedding hors d'oeuvres, and do you prefer a buffet or a sit-down dinner at a wedding? Yeah. Whoa. Yeah. That is a great question. Yes. Obviously, the audience is very energized.

I'll tell you, I'll tell you a wedding app I like. Bacon-wrapped scallops. Scallops? Scallops. You like a scallop? I came home, I said scallops, and my mom got mad at me. This is true.

Yes. Scallops. Bacon-wrapped scallops. Scallops. Right, Ma? She left. She went, yeah! She's gone.

I don't blame her. It's very late. I, to answer your, the odorous question, I'm a little, I'm having trouble finding an answer, but answer the second question. Boy, as I bend to more weddings, I've learned to enjoy the buffet, because I think in a course meal,

you're more likely to get things that are individual items that you're less excited about, whereas in a buffet, you can just like, well, you know what, I don't really like the spread here, but hey, I can load up on salad, and there's maybe one protein that I can get that will take me home, and yeah, these rolls with butter,

that'll be fine, you know? I don't know, that's my feeling. Many a person has thought at a wedding there's maybe one protein here that can take me home. I like to order the dinner, Nick. Really? Mm-hmm. I never get it wrong.

I always get it right. I get it right. And then if I got it wrong, I just ask them for the right one. Because usually at a wedding, you have a choice of three. Yeah. A vegetarian, a fish, or a meat, right? Right, and what I do is,

if I see that one is better than the other, I lie to them. So they'll bring it out, and you'll be like, oh, I actually had the chicken. Yes. And you'll make a swap. Yeah. So massively inconveniencing a service worker.

That's right. I like the buffet, because you can get a little bit of everything. Yes. And then the hors d'oeuvres, I don't really care as long as there's like an open bar situation before dinner. Right.

So I can get real fucking hammered, enjoy whatever's at the buffet, dance for a while, and then after there's like a fun food truck, and you're like, that's where I eat again. Right. That actually is fun when a food truck or something arrives,

there's someone like just making tacos in the casual. Hodgman? The food truck late arrival at a wedding, I think is a very west coast thing. Oh, interesting. Something that anyone here understands what you're talking about.

Oh. Because in the New England area at a wedding, most important thing is open bar. That's true. Basically, the food is an inconvenience in that. Do you know another good thing you can do? My friend, Joey O, is getting married in October. Congrats, Joey O.

Congrats, Joey O. And you just ask him, because he's tasted it. When the thing came, I was like, what do I get, the chicken or the steak? And he said, the chicken's better. I got the chicken. Yeah. Wow, that's great.

I think it's very traditional on the east coast to have a sit down dinner. Yeah. And I think that that's wrong. I think a buffet is the better way to serve a large group of people. Fair enough. Because there are more choices.

Yes. The food, you're basically creating a bunch of different casseroles that are designed to sit around on a steam table and get better as they get older. Sure. As opposed to pretending that this dumb fillet or chicken breast has been especially made for you.

It's airplane food at that point. Fuck. Yeah, I agree. And as far as an order of his, baby lamb chops all the way. Wow. Wow. Sean, that's a thank you for the question. Congratulations.

Thank you. Do you have any plans for orders for your wedding? Have you figured that out? No. Wait, are you the bachelor? Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. No, it's me.

I'm getting married. Congrats. Congratulations. Oh, yeah, I'm sorry. I should have made that clear. Thanks. All right. All right.

John Joe is up last. Hi, John. Thank you for waiting. What's your question? Hi there. Sorry. Super nervous. Okay.

So this is the lowest stakes have ever been for you. I assure you. Boundaries are hard. So when I was growing up, my mom always bought me shitty white castle fillet fish right before like music competitions. So I was just wondering before any sort of performances or competitions or, I guess, trying to gain your parental

parents love, what kind of food do you associate with that? So John, this is crazy, first of all, because we just had White Castle, Mitch and I reviewed it in New York last night. So it's very fresh in our brain, specifically the fillet of fish. It sucked. Which was awful. It's so bad.

Just fucking dog shit. I can't believe that was hoisted on you just before a performance. As a reward. As a reward. Okay. I thought the fish was good for your brain. Oh, that's adorable.

Yeah. So we all raise, everyone put like $5 in a hat for his therapy. I'm willing to take it, you know. I will say that once before, by the way, what did you play? I played the piano. Piano. Very cool.

I played the, I played Woodwinds. Not just double reads. I also played single reads when I was younger. Wow. Big reveal. A clarinet concert. Oh, you mean when you were younger, when you were less sophisticated.

Is that what you're saying? Yeah. When I grew older, I put aside childish things. No, I continued to play single reads, but I played clarinet when I was younger and I had chili cheese fries, one of my favorite foods, like a gigantic plate of chili cheese fries just before I had to play a clarinet concert. And I remember specifically my parents saying, is that going

to hurt your stomach? And I was like, no. And then on stage, like, like four measures into the performance, I had the sensation that Mitch has been experiencing for this entire show. The meet and greets happening in a bathroom, by the way. People would do it. You know that.

I hope you didn't have to share that clarinet with any other players after you breathed a lot of spit and chili cheese fry breath into it. I had my own at that point. When I took clarinet lessons at the All Newton Music School in Newton, Massachusetts, studying under the director of the All Newton Music School, Paulette Bose, my dad would pick me up and he would always bring me a Big Mac.

And I have such fond associations with the Big Mac for that. It was not the competition. Competition isn't everything. As long as I win. And I stopped eating Big Macs for a while because our kids hate McDonald's so much. What the hell? And I would like want to go there and they would be like,

no, please, daddy, don't go there. It smells so bad. Don't go. And one time. They don't like chicken nuggies? They don't. They don't care for any of it. They don't like the French fries?

No. They don't like a toy that comes with their food? No, they hate toys. They hate pleasure of all kinds. It's the New England. It's the Boston Web. New England of them. When I was driving from Maine to our show, I got a Big Mac

at the McDonald's in Belfast, Maine because I really wanted to have one and I called my son and I said, I'm having one right now. He said, please, father, no. I'm doing it. I'm eating it right now. I was screamed and he hung up on me. It was terrible.

Nicole, any food associated with the performance? Yeah. You get off stage. Do you have a thing you want to eat? No. Sorry. You say your thing. No, it's fine.

I just drink more vodka when I get off stage. But when I was in high school, I did track and field. Whoa. I did shot put the fat girl sport. It was truly the biggest of the chunk. I was just being like, I can't throw this. So after like meats and whatnot, like I was pretty good. I would like get like first or second or whatever.

My mom would take me to Dairy Queen and she would let me order whatever I wanted and whatever I wanted, morphed into a peanut buster parfait. So there's fudge on the bottom and then I'll let like ice cream, but I would get the fudge on the bottom of Reese's peanut butter cup miniature peanuts, sprinkles, a touch of ice cream, and then repeat it several times. That rules.

And I don't know why this woman let me eat that. It was like, she was like, I've already given up on you. Like it was not great, but I love them. That's like to this day, whenever I eat that, it reminds me of my mom. Oh. That rules. Mitch, what do you think? I would occasionally get McDonald's after like football double sessions

where I was very bad at football and I burned like 60 calories. I will say when Mitch took me on a driving tour of Quincy, one place he took me is the storage locker that an assistant coach locked him inside in football practice. That's true. Wait, what? Why? Coach Chrisman coach Carter told me there was something in the back

of the equipment shed or locker. And then I went in there and they locked me in and they were laughing outside of it. It was funny. But you kind of, when you're showing it, you kind of threw it away. It was like, oh yeah, that's the shed I got locked in by the coaches. I was like, what on earth? We two adults locked a child in a closet and then left outside.

It was funny as hell. They rule. I love Coach Carter and Coach Chrisman. Mitch pointed this out to you? He did. Yeah. Remember when I showed you the swan boats? Wasn't that nice?

That was nice. That was lovely. I used to get Villarosa. I used to get a cheese pizza in Buffalo Fingers. It is so wild. Buffalo Fingers. I can't fuck that up in the movie. Fingers.

Fingers. Fingers. Right for Chris Pratt. Fingers. Why are you saying Fingers? Hello, Chris Pratt. It's pronounced swastika. I can't top that.

Choking. I'm dying. Oh, there we go. Thank you. Yeah, pizza in Buffalo Fingers. I used to have that at Villarosa to celebrate a big moment in Quincy. And that means a lot to me too. It was a family thing.

Yeah. That's wonderful. What a wonderful question. Thank you so much, John. I really appreciate it. Thank you so much, Mitch. This was it. This was what we'll be back tomorrow.

But this was our big Boston show. I want to say give it up for two of the funniest working people in comedy. So funny. We love them. Nicole Byer. John Hodgman. Two of the funniest people. And Nick, I love you too.

And you made eye contact. I did. I can do that. You'll get there, my friend. And thank you to Emma and Usong for doing everything. This entire tour. Special shout out to Dano for helping us out tonight. Thank you, Dano.

And just thank you for all the listeners who came out and supported us. Everyone sitting in the audience is the reason that we get to be up here, and we really appreciate it. Special thanks to everyone from Quincy. There's a lot. And apologies if you had to sit next to anyone from Quincy. A huge thanks to my mom and my sister Courtney, and I love you both. My mom picked up stickers.

Hey, Donny. Donny's in the audience. My mom picked up stickers for the show. So go buy some of them. So it was worthwhile. I shouldn't have plugged that in my sincere moment. The stickers? I don't have to plug the stickers.

It's fine. Well, your mom got them. My mom got them. Yeah. Yeah, like I said, I wish my dad was here to see you. I'm not going to say that anymore. Jesus Christ. But, uh, okay.

But my dad's best friend is here tonight, my godfather and my godmother, Kathy. And there are kids, Sarah and Evan and Neil. Neil owns the Fat Cat in Quincy and they just opened a new location. So check it out. Uh, but I've been lucky to have people like my godfather and people like you in my life. So thank you very much. Thank you. Thanks, guys.

Until next time for the Smooth Man, Mike Mitchell. I'm Nick Whyger, Happy! On the next Doe Boys Double, it's a Doe Boys street fight. The boys welcome Brett and Brian, host of the Anarco comedy show Street Fight Radio. We taste test Fago and thank Brian for his service portraying Chuck E. Cheese. Get the Doe Boys Double every Tuesday only at Patreon.com slash Doe Boys. Sources for this week's intro include A Curse Born of Hate by Glenn Stout. Red Sox Yankees is baseball's ultimate rivalry from USA Today.

Fromer's Guide, Regina Pizzeria. Is Regina Pizzeria really the best in the country by Devra First? Full list of sources available in the episode description.