Doughboys - Rubio's with Mary Holland (LIVE)

Episode Date: December 6, 2018

Actor and comedian Mary Holland (Veep, Comedy Bang! Bang!) joins us to review a chain that originated in San Diego, emphasizing its fish tacos: Rubio's. Plus, a Sprite edition of Drank or Stank. Recorded live at the House of Blues in San Diego. Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgum podcast. In the most inclement weather, he might be seen barefooted and almost naked except when he chants to pick up articles of old clothing. This excerpt from the Fort Wayne Sentinel dated March 22, 1845 is from the obituary of John Chapman. Born two years before the signing of the Declaration of Independence, Chapman grew up amidst the chaos of the American Revolution, and in the war's aftermath, he and his brother Nathaniel migrated west to Ohio to work as farmers.

Around 1805, John Chapman left the family homestead to take an apprenticeship as an orchardist, where he would connect it with a crop that would define his life's work, the apple. A deeply religious devotee of the small Lutheran sect of Swedenborgianism, Chapman took to traveling the new nation to spread both the gospel and the seeds of what is perhaps the most American of fruits, earning him the enduring nickname Johnny Appleseed. While popular legend depicts Johnny traipsing through the countryside, scattering seeds at random, Chapman was in fact a careful planter who left lovingly curated orchards in his

wake, the bulk of his planting consisting of bitter and edible apples best suited for brewing alcoholic hard cider. The legend of Johnny Appleseed would become a part of American folklore, and 80 years after his death, another American horticulturist would replicate the process with a fruit formerly known as the alligator pear, the avocado. In 1925, Rudolph Haas, a postal worker in Pasadena, California, cashed in his savings to establish an avocado grove, and after a laborious decade-long process of growing and seed-grafting, he struck mushy green gold with his patented eponymous varietal.

Today, Haas avocados, often mispronounced as haas, comprise roughly 95% of the avocado crop in the U.S., making Rudolph into something of a Johnny avocado seed. The ready availability of avocados was key to the growth of Mexican cuisine in the Golden State, avocados naturally being the main ingredient in guacamole, a dish that dates back to the Aztecs, and in 1983, an Aztec of a different sort, a San Diego State alum named Ralph. In a taco shop in San Diego's Mission Beach neighborhood, inspired by the fresh, seafood-focused fare of nearby Baja, California, Ralph's concept was a quick hit and grew into three local locations, then dozens more across the Southland, ultimately doing more than arguably

any other chain to popularize the fish taco in the States. Now with over 200 locations and a claim of 200 million battered cod tacos sold to date, Ralph's restaurant has spread fresh Mexican fare from sea to shining sea, making this modern man into something of a Johnny fish taco seed. This week on Doughboys, Rubios. Welcome to Doughboys. How you doing San Diego? Guys, we have a really, really great show. Thanks for being a great crowd so far already. Before we go any further, this week's roast is courtesy of At Pipe Hates Onions. Let me

introduce my co-host, Neil deGrassefed Tyson, the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell! What's up San Diego? What's going on? Hot crowd! Hot crowd! Certainly is, Nick. Neil deGrassefed Tyson, bad day to choose that roast. Bad day for Neil deGrassefed Tyson. I was wondering, I was like, would it enhance it or was it going to make it worse? I don't know. It's not the worst news he got today, yeah. What's up? Happy last day of November, everybody! I knew it would get a big pop. Happy December Eve, yeah.

Who's fucking staying up till midnight drinking eggnog tonight? Get those advent calendars ready. Get your stockings hung. That's pretty early. Isn't it really? December 1st, get the stock reasonable. Well, this is coming from a guy, by the way. I just want to know how Nick Weigher prepares for a show. Five minutes before showtime, I'm gonna go floss. It was the right move. Here's the thing, I had a salad backstage. Yes.

And I'm glad I flossed, because you know what I got out of there? A little bit of mescaline in between my molars. That might have been embarrassing if I had that on stage. You were eating a bowl of romaine lettuce. Yeah. Praying to God. I specifically requested it from the affected counties in California. This is how I want to go out. What's that?

Oh, micro kills. Okay. Thank you. Thank you for your crow barring in that hot salad reference from the sixth row. If you guys have any inside jokes, you'd like to just shout out during the podcast. Feel free. Mitch, how you feel? We're at the House of Blues. What a venue. We are. We're gonna turn into the House of Boos.

Someone, you're cheering for the House of Boos? I'm just confused by that. We don't want to be entertained. That's why we came to Doe Boys. We were saying backstage, there's musical notes, and they put bands up. It's like the Dead Kennedys and Devo. We laughed at the idea of a musical note with Doe Boys in there. No one knows.

When we come and do live shows, we said this. We feel bad for the crew because they usually get to tech like food fighters or something. And then it's us fucking two boring nerds. Yeah. We had Morris Day in the Time here last week. Now we got to listen to two chunky idiots talk about fucking fast food for 90 minutes. And people are like, are here? They paid these guys.

They paid the audience. The audience paid? This is a bat kid scenario. What's going on here? Change that B to an F. Mitch, how are you feeling? We both went under the weather, but you under the weather more recently. Yeah, that's right.

I was under the weather more recently. I'm on antibiotics, everybody. Oh, boy. Very cool. A very cool thing to bring up for the top of the show. I hadn't seen Nick in like two weeks, two and a half weeks. You came in and you didn't even make eye contact with me. You started taking your stuff out of your bag.

And you didn't even say hello to me for like 15 minutes. Yeah, that's right. We text. I've been texting. That's the same thing. We were texting earlier today. That's not the same thing. We live in a digital age. Guys, it's a big show.

Can I say this? Yes. Nick Weigar's family is in the audience tonight. I have some family members out here. Oh, boy. As many regular listeners know, I am a native of Southern California, so my family is out here.

They're here. They're going to get disappointed in person. I hope they boo us during the show. That'll be my dream come true. There's a chance. Yeah, I've been sick for coming to my orchestra concerts. I was home. Hanging out at Thanksgiving, watching a lot of movies

in bed with my mom. Let's unpack that for a second. It's a glimpse of what will happen if I move home. We just sat up. We watched movies in her bed. It was very nice. Right. What are you trying to get at, you piece of shit? I'm not getting at anything.

You're just volunteering this information. And then I was very, I got very sick, and I went to the CBS Minute Clinic. I said, Mr. I won't tell it. I can't tell the story. Right. You know the story. I know the story. You should not tell the story.

It upset me. I didn't like hearing it. It was gross. It was gross. Mitch, there's something I want to talk about. We're in San Diego. This is the first show we've done down here. Yeah. And there's a, as residents of LA,

there is something that pertains to both of our cities. And that is the movement of the Chargers franchise north of the 405 which no one in San Diego and no one in LA was in favor of.

It's just a baffling decision. I was down here like a couple months ago and there was a Chargers game on and there was like, I was like in Oceanside and there was a bar in Oceanside. I was like packed with Chargers fans and then you go up to like the stadium and they can't even

fill it to half capacity with Chargers fans. It's all road fans. So guess what? We're gonna have a move back down, everybody. That's right. We've got them to break their 20-year lease or whatever it is they signed up there. Someone's booing that. They don't like the idea of it. It's so straight. As an NFL fan,

like what did you think of that? Jesus. What's wrong with that question? Because I know that you're, because you're saying as an NFL fan, by the way, look at Nick Sweater. Who does? He bought an NBA sweatshirt that just has the NBA logo on it.

That's right. That's insane. I'm repping the entire league. That's like if you were a fan of chicken fingers, you got a Tyson sweatshirt. That's bizarre. I just want all the players to have a fun time. That's like what umpires

like they give to their family members at Christmas. Right. Is the logo. Which I thought you'd made it. When you walked in, I told you that I thought you made that sweatshirt. Like put this patch on an American apparel sweatshirt with a hot glue gun.

Yeah, I know that crafty. Yeah, I know. I like it. I like the color and I like the thing. I like just supporting the league. That's insane. That's weird. All right. Sorry guy who's wearing a shirt

of your own podcast. Yeah. Well, we're doing the podcast. I got to buy him up quick. They only go up to 5 XL on the website. Who knows when I not be able to fit in one. But Mitch, you mentioned earlier it was a I'm sorry. I didn't get you didn't get your answer

on the Chargers topic. I apologize. I thought it was bullshit. I didn't think they should remove the team. That's crazy. There is a great fan base down here. No one cared. Fuck you guys. I'm happy they moved the team. This pandemic is too transparent. No, I always thought it was a bad move.

Yeah, no one in LA cares. I mean, they do care about the Lakers and they care about the Dodgers. I think the Rams had a fan base because I grew up in LA Rams fan even though I don't follow the NFL anymore but I grew up in LA Rams fan. Yeah.

And when they when they moved to St. Louis, I was kind of like, ah, fuck this. I was mad at the league. If I was still following the NFL, I'd be excited to come back and think a lot of people are. But yeah, the Chargers, it made no sense. Total disconnect. Yeah, it's terrible. By the way, you told me before

that your parents are super sociable and your brother is very sociable. Absolutely true. So what happened? What's the deal? Here's the thing. Should we bring them on stage and figure this out? No. We're not going to do that.

But I also realized I forgot I fucked up on an element of the stage picture. Hold on, I'm going to rectify this real quick. I was supposed to strike the stool. Oh, the stool. I was supposed to make fun of that. I was supposed to strike the stool. I think people were cheering for the stool most of the time.

There it goes. All right, great. Well, now I'm on stage by myself and Nick is gone. Pro-vamping there, Mitch. Thanks, man. Um, the, uh, I just moved a stool for anyone listening that was in front of the, uh, the table.

Who gives a shit about them concentrated on them right now? Anyway, but, uh, yeah, so I think the I think for it to psychoanalyze myself I grew up in a very rambunctious neighbor. I had a friend tell me they could tell like they could tell when my family was watching a sitcom

because they could hear everyone's laugh from the street. What the hell? Took a very boisterous family. And so I grew up as the youngest part, the youngest child here, and I'm a good amount younger than my brother. I was like, sort of became a listener. I just sort of was like, okay, you know,

like I just sort of taken it. I was a observer of human behavior. What fucking sitcoms was your family watching? Oh, man. Caroline in the city. The single guy. All right, I get it now. Yeah. Real gut busters.

I just feel like one of them should be on stage hosting with me. I mean, what are you teeing up here? That the show should end. But, Mitch, very quickly moving on from that. The, you mentioned we're on, we're in Christmas, December Eve, rather. Yeah, yep.

Going into the Christmas holiday. I know you're a huge Christmas man. I'm a big Christmas man. How do you feel about the jolliest of seasons being upon us? Oh, my God. You made a question about Christmas dorky somehow. I like, I'm a huge, who isn't a Christmas fan?

Well, I mean, obviously, I guess some people don't celebrate it. But whatever. Whatever. We should all celebrate Christmas. I'll tell you why I think I like Christmas. I think that I do well with, like, dating

around the holidays. Wow. Because I think I'm Santa-like in many ways. And I think... And I think... And this, if there's any month that a woman is going to be a horny for a Santa-like man, it is, it's December.

Oh, my God. It's true. I've been dressing as Santa since I was in, like, high school and college. My friends' families. I laughed so hard I, like, spit into my hand. And then I wiped it on my face accidentally. Ugh.

It's a real gross scene. It's fucking disgusting. Yeah. That is so, so funny. Yeah. The idea that women are... Horned up for a younger Santa. Santa from the reboot. It's true.

So I love December. It's great. That's not the only reason, though, right? You've loved it since you were a boy, since before you were on the dating scene, but before Tinder even existed. Yeah, I loved Christmas forever. I mean, I liked the idea of getting gifts when I was young.

My mom, it was way too long for me with Christmas, where my mom, like, sat me down on the couch and she was like, Santa, like, doesn't exist. You fucking idiot. It was like, I was in, like, seventh grade. Right. And I was like, but, like, the spirit of Christmas doesn't. She's like, yeah, who gives a shit?

You don't fucking idiot. Get the fuck out of here. But no, I've always, it's a great time of year. I get to go home. I have my sabbatical and Quincy and it's great. Do you have a favorite Christmas gift of all time? Huh. Favorite Christmas gift of all time.

Yeah. You know what? I told you, I think I've said this on the podcast before, right? I asked for moon shoes at one point. Do people remember moon shoes? And my mom, the Christmas I didn't get them and I was like, I didn't get them. Oh, well. And then my mom found them, like,

five years later and I was, like, 200 pounds. And she's like, moon shoes. Like, I found them in the attic and I was like, cool. And then I, like, jumped in the straps all broke. But moon shoes I really wanted. I don't know. Gack.

I don't know. What the fuck do you want me to say? I don't... Super girls and ghosts was a big one. Yeah. I mean, plagued by slow down on the Super Nintendo. That's true. Still a very playable game. Yeah. We should keep going on this tangent. Let's keep talking about Capcom games from the 90s.

This is really clicking. Do you have a favorite? Do you have a favorite gift? What did you ask for? I asked for one. You're the type of kid who would be happy with coal. Actually, it's very... It actually burns very efficiently. Yeah.

A big video game guy. I love video games. I treasured getting video games as gifts. Okay. Something especially coming to mind. I'm sure I got bikes at some... You know what? At one point I did get a music stand.

Which I liked. Because it made it easier to practice my bassoon. You can only prop up your sheet music on your desk at home so many times before you want a proper music stand. Oh, my God! The thing that there's thousands of in every school?

You think I'm going to hide something from my public school? Your favorite is a music stand? What about the bassoon itself? I mean, that wasn't a gift. All right. Fine. Did you ever play any Christmas music on your bassoon for your family?

That's a good question. I've told you this before. I had a saxophone, and I remember I went downstairs and I was like, mom, dad, and my grandma and grandpa was there, and I think about this back on this a lot. Where I was like, watch me play the Simpsons

on my saxophone. And I took my saxophone and I didn't know how to play the saxophone at all. Right. And so I just went... And then I remember, like, in my mind, it's burning in my mind now that, like,

my grandma, my grandpa, my nana, and my papa are all like, yay! And clapping, and they'd all be dead within two years. And I wasted, like... I wasted, like, a good 20 minutes of their time. Yeah.

And the last two years of their lives, listen to this kid... I don't even know how to play the saxophone. You know, these... I've wasted their time. It sucks. And the whole time, their internal monologue is like, well, no great grandkids. Mitch, let's introduce our guest.

They knew that the second my head didn't fucking fit coming out the fucking passageway, baby. Yeah. I was a C-section baby right away. Yeah, a C-plus section. Let's introduce our guest. She's an actor and comedy bang bang and Wild Horse is the great Mary Holland!

Thank you for this theme music. I requested Robin Hood Prince of Thieves theme. Sometimes you come to see a regular Doe Boy show, but sometimes you see a show with a little bit of magic.

Holy shit! For our listeners and the feed, I won't even begin to describe what Mary just did. It was just for the people in the House of Blues in San Diego, because that was mind-blowing. There's people in the front row that are fucking puking. They had no idea what they saw.

Someone is speaking in tongues and is being escorted out by security. You song just jumped off the balcony. I mean, you might have been planning to do that anyway. Pretty magical. Oh, I was told, what about your drop? Oh, fuck.

Wow. It's been a while. What the fuck do you want me to say? Oh, that's what you guys were waiting for over there. I was looking at you and was like, what the fuck's the hold up? Anyways. Thank you, Mary. I'm in San Diego. And let me hit you with a little

drop. After the meal, the waiter saw how big I was and he jumped on my back and he rode me around the outside of the restaurant. 100% true. You got Yoshi'd? I got Yoshi'd. He was like, look at you, you're so big. And then he jumped on my back and rode me around.

I went with it. Yeah. I started going, and pulling things into my mouth. Yeah, Mitch. If you can give me a ride home, I'll just up on your back. God damn it. This isn't becoming a thing, okay?

In all the times, we'll let it finish. In all the times, I think we should get rid of drops. It's most definitely when we're staring out into a sea of people who are silent. They're just staring at people nodding. Just looking out dead-eyed while no one is having fun. It's appropriate you teed it up

with that story of you playing the Simpsons on the saxophone. Oh my God. You're saying I'm wasting these people's time. Very much paralleled that experience. That is so funny. It's so funny that you made those noises with your mouth.

As a kid, you're like, same thing. Right. You're like, this is fooling people. I've told this story, I think, on Wild Horses or something, but when I was in second grade, my best friends was very smart. She was the smartest girl in our class,

and she was already reading like, big kid books, like more than 10 pages. Shit, I don't even tackle that now. Like, you know, kind of paperback size. We would always have reading time during the school day.

As my mom puts it, she's like, I thought you had a big problem with phonics. Because I really had a hard time reading. I'm fine now. But yes, but one time during reading time, I was like, well,

I can do that too. And so I just picked up a book off the like, big kid rack, and I opened it, and I just started going like that. Mary is shaking your head from side to side. Because that's what I saw her do. And I was like, anybody

can read, watch. Which makes you seem the most insane. Right. If I saw my kid doing that, they have to go to the doctor, they're fucked up. Yeah, who's watching me? Like, who's keeping tabs on what I'm reading? I was extremely

far-sighted as a boy. I was extremely far-sighted. I've told you, so I could see everything on the chalkboard, great. And then I was, I would read with the book right in front of my face, and the teacher thought I was slow. This is true.

But it turns out, what, what, what are you going to say, your piece of shit? I'm not saying anything. So I was, I was, I was holding the book right up to my face and reading it, and they were like, like, we think you slow. They were going to put me in, in, in development.

They said we think you're slow. Well, I mean, they probably used the nicer term that was a different time. Like, they thought I, they had, they thought I had some, some problems, and I went to the doctor. I was almost blot, oh my god, Nick, your microphone. Whoa, crazy. That was wild. This thing just twirled

around in its own. I went to the doctor. I was barely blind in one of my eyes. I wore an eye patch for a full year. No. Flesh-colored eye patch. Oh, that's so much worse. Yeah, why did you go flesh-colored? I got a choice. And I said, I want fucking flesh-colored, baby.

No, you didn't. Oh, I don't want to look like a pirate and something cool. I want to look deformed. Yeah, I was nearly blind in an eye and then I had thick glasses and that's what that was the issue. As I just, I mean, it was weird that I still did it

after the fact. I still read with my book close to my face. Right. But yeah, no, that's that. It turned out. I just couldn't see. How do you, because here's the thing. You're not somebody who wears contacts, right? No. So how do you see well, the doctor gave like a very like scary warning. Uh-huh.

He was like some day like be warned. And I was like, what? And he was like, some day you will become extremely nearsighted like the soothsayer from Julie Caesar. You know, he really didn't warn me. He's like, some day you're gonna become extremely

nearsighted. And I was like, all right, see you later, you fucking idiot. And I walked out and I've been seeing fine ever since. Did he say how to prevent it? Was he like, beware if you don't blank. No, no, he might have. I don't know. I wore glasses for a long time and then I stopped wearing. I stopped. I went to

middle school and I wanted to look cool. Right. Yeah. And so I got rid of my glasses. I got contacts and I wore those for like a week and I was like, this sucks. And I stopped wearing them and my eyes corrected themselves. So you have you been. I don't know. Yeah, I don't think I think the human body works

that way. But have you like been to an optometrist and they've like been like you don't need glasses. He told me I had. Yes, I went to. I went to an eye doctor and he said I had the best vision. No, who did you go to? I did. He said I had the best vision he had ever seen. No, and he retired.

I used to want braces so bad. I thought what on earth? I wanted them so bad. I thought they looked so cool. So I would I would take a paper clip and I would unfold it and put it. It was really I put it over my teeth

and it really hurt. But it was worth it. It was worth it because everyone was like, oh, do you know you don't have braces. Braces are a nightmare. That is the worst thing to ever with them. Then I did get braces and they are a night. They're horrible. They're awful.

You were talking Nick, you're talking about food that like you would I would have food shoot out of my mouth like 12 hours after I ate it. Yeah, it's brutal. Like a nugget would shoot out. When I had braces, I just stopped brushing my teeth. I was like, oh, I don't need to brush them anymore. Wow. They're in braces.

What am I going to do? People were mad. Sorry, I'm sorry. They're better now. They're all wooden. Mary, I want to talk a little bit about some some breaking shoes that pertains to you. You and

and Matt Newell, your boyfriend came on our podcast to talk about medieval times. You used to work at medieval times. They have a new storyline that involves for the first time, not a king but a queen.

I was so thrilled to see that headline and I was at the same time so jealous with my with my whole body I was jealous and I'm like trying to figure out a way that I can somehow

work my way into that like what would could I email medieval times at medieval times dot org. Yes. And be like, can I play? Can I do it? I think they'd be lucky to have you. That would be amazing.

I don't know. We'll see. Guys, right? Thanks, guys. Yeah, I was overjoyed to hear that news. That is so exciting. It's a night back special. I would do it for five years. I would drop everything

and do it for five years. No, I would. I think that would be so fun to get to do it for one night. I'm sure they don't allow that, but if they do. Oh, God, what a dream. It's so exciting. It really is. That's awesome. And how the timing

of that is so wild. Yeah, I mean like it was very soon after we did our show. Right. Yeah, just we got to we got to return and we got to revisit this new story because I'm going to be really intrigued in how they integrate that with the falconry and the rough writing.

But the but yeah, it's so you're there. Nick, I heard good news too that Medieval Times is also looking for equine fluffers. All right. So one night only. You know my immediate family

is in the audience telling everyone I wasn't saying you put it in your fucking mouth. Oh God Christ. I'm saying I wasn't saying that. Yeah, just saying you jack off a horse. Nothing wrong with that.

Good. They know they know they know but beyond that beyond the me beyond what's happening with medieval times you're telling us something else backstage and I found this fascinating because this is something I have not experienced

you are you are something of an escape room finette. Oh yeah. What is it about escape rooms and what what is the escape room experience for a neophyte Okay. Oh my God. Okay. So Jesus Christ, I just wasn't ready.

I got a quick question. Is this considered an escape room people are going to climb over each other to get the fuck out of here. I love escape room so much. I love puzzles. I love teamwork. I love ensembles. That's why I'm an actor.

I really there's something about having and you know some are better than others like some puzzles are better than others like but there's something about the having to accomplish a task in a certain

amount of time in their puzzles and you are required to work with other people to solve it. It makes me feel like a kid again like I feel like oh word this is it's like it's like exercises to help us learn how to count and

what am I saying it's like it really takes me back to my I feel so playful. I don't know I just feel so free. I feel like the most myself that I've ever felt and

the escape room experience I would say I mean I could definitely give you some advice about like so you've never done one. I've never done one. Have you ever done one? I've never done one either. Okay has anybody in the audience done them? Do we love them? Who?

Anyone any escape room skeptics hashtag escape doom just a couple just a couple people. Listen I mean you can have a bad experience especially if you hear is one thing that will guarantee

maybe not a bad experience but a not optimal experience is if you go with too many people because if you go with 8 plus people depends on the room obviously but if you go too many people then it ends up being some people working on puzzles and most people just standing around

watching other people working on puzzles really 4 to 6 people get in there with people that you like that are game for a good time and I promise you'll have the most fun. Why do you want to escape the room is what I think.

We talked about this with the movie room and I think the room is nice. I want to stay in a room just get cable and relax. So you take away from the harrowing survival tail room was that you'd like to just be in there.

Oh God Mitch. The room was nice the room was nice. Look my issue with the movie room is that the room seemed nice. It had a skyline. You need to give it a second feeling. It was a nice room. It's a fictional story for God's sakes.

Don't get mad at me. Oh boy. I like a room I like to sit in a room and not do anything. No. I also like to sit in rooms like I find I'm mostly in rooms right sitting but I think

it's it's like it's like someone telling you it's like oh shoot I wish I could think of what it's like I it's there's something about being assigned a task and given a deadline yeah that really just

feels so good. This feels right up Weigar's alley honestly. I really think you would enjoy them. I could assign Mitch a task and give him a deadline and he would not fulfill it. That's right but I could I don't know I like it also though it kind of stresses me out because I feel like

I would think I could do it well and then if I couldn't I would feel very inadequate like if I couldn't solve a puzzle I get stuck on something I'd feel like a fool and I definitely do feel that way a lot but but it's but mostly I just enjoy the challenge right I

it feels good to make your brain think in ways that like you you don't have to in your day to day life like it just it's really really great and it you sort of come out of it feeling like whoa that was crazy I have a flip on it

it's if you escape outside the escape is you get to go into a room and relax you don't have to be outdoors anymore because if there was a thing like that I'd be like fucking Tom Brady I quarterback that shit I'd get us inside in a fucking instant

I guarantee you you'd pull off the reverse Shawshank I mean clock clock through an underground tunnel and then dig into a cell I think you're I passed by Andy Dufresne in the tunnel what the fuck are you think you're gonna go out there into the fucking open I got three

hots and a cot I'm sitting pretty you just are describing a locked door yeah there's been there's there's been moments in my life where I think prison seems interesting no I can't do this what's the matter with you

if you want to prison for like three years I probably get really great at sit-ups first of all sure what else TV is there a pool I feel like you need to watch some lockups or something good idea what this experience

is again I think there's a lot of there's a lot of things that you just don't know there's just there's a lot of the world that you have a I don't want to go to prison you need to get out of rooms and go see the world I know I've been out there it sucks um so Mary one other thing

that that pertains to your past experiences on the show yeah we have a seafood focus chain tonight and you I know that you are you are a big fan of one of our earliest episodes of the Long John Silver's you came on and reviewed it have you like how do you feel

beyond the Long John Silver's experience which is very much this fried sort of fast food version how do you feel about seafood in general are you a seafood fanatic oh yeah I like seafood a lot I will say though that I can easily get sort of overloaded

with it right like I love one thing I can't get enough of is snow crab legs I will crack a lack all day long I love people are cheering I like that I genuinely like that

they're actually talking about food but fish I can grow very tired of except for sushi like that's that's another interesting thing is I I really can grow very tired of cooked fish quickly I I sort of like I get it is it's that right

but but raw fish I'm like whoa it's you know it's something new I don't know it's different do you have like a like when we're talking sushi do you have a favorite kind oh yeah what do you I love salmon I love raw salmon

salmon that's delightful oh my gosh salmon sushi salmon sashimi I will almost exclusively get salmon rolls or sushi mitch how do you what what's your what's your sushi consumption like I I'm a big salmon as a giant bear of a man I like

salmon as well but there's cut with your own paw from a stream where it's fed you on a plate I don't frequent streams you asshole I I'll have a lobster you know

what the my last two meals when I was home uh-huh one was lobster I had a lot I had a lobster dinner you're talking home like in Quincy mass yeah I had a lobster dinner and and stuffed clams that's fun and then and then I had my mom's baked attic the nice and I wish you makes

a great baked attic so she but she would make her you would you be blown away by this trust me I agree with your cooked seafood whatever but my issue with the lobsters you got to pull it apart and there you know like a can be a lot of work I love about it really we we love to escape the crab

you're the crabs hole and you got to figure out how to get the meat out so fun we had lobster this was the fucked up thing is we had we had lobster for my second last dinner home I broke it open I was like what the fuck is that like in the lobster my mom

was like it's the eggs oh lobster eggs I was like oh what the fuck like it was a it was about to give birth to a baby lobster or something and not no more it ain't yeah no shit I ate it did you eat the eggs no I didn't know I did not eat the lobster

lobster eggs are they a thing like do people row it's probably yeah it's probably a delicacy they were like it was like orange it was very strange my grandpa used to eat the I think it's called tamale you know the green the green shit inside of the lobster yes oh yeah

he ate all he would eat all the innards all the guts yeah I was just I mean he also was like he basically had like Alzheimer's so he was eating a shoe and he was I don't know he called me Harold I loved him but he was old I

don't know he ate the weird shit in the lobster oh man what a bummer he called me Harold and George it was great I loved him he's the man I've said this before on the on the on the podcast he threw I came home with my grandma and had

a full happy meal he threw the entire thing in the fire and it was like by the way summertime right and he had a cord of oxygen dangling from his neck like dynamite over the fire why was there a fire in the summer he

made he was making him it was fucking crazy it was crazy he had oxygen deficiency oh which I'm sure to suffer from as well yeah Jesus yeah I wonder do you suspect at all that this was all a cover story so we could fuck with you

hahahaha oh that would be hilarious bro I like the as far as seafood goes I will sometimes like a whole fish like in terms of like a little bit of work like you get like a whole

like a well done whole fish that's that's something of a treat you want to see its head yeah I'm down to see its head I know what I mean yeah I mean not like you know I don't know I mean like like it doesn't have to be so you would have liked the baby lobster eggs in the lobster that I found no I would not have liked that

that's a little too grim for me I actually for that movie in the bedroom uh this woman sissy space sec the one where she breaks the plate in the oscar clip you were the one who let him get away with everything hahahaha

but thank you but uh they like have a they they're the guys like a lobster man and he goes out there and he shows one of the the lobsters with eggs and he's like if you get one of these in the bedroom title line

meaning the lobster trap they call in the bedroom you have to throw it back so I think you probably weren't supposed to have that lobster why did you do that bitch I didn't catch it myself for god sakes oh my god that's crazy that's what in the bedroom is about

it's about fishing that's no that's an element of it that's just like a local color in the movie but then it's ultimately about he's having a the son is having who's the John Connor in Terminator 3 that actor is having an affair

with Marissa Tomei and who's older than him and then her husband uh like kills him and then it's all a murder revenge story Jesus yeah it's really grim check it out a lot of fun I don't like things that grim but anyway here's the grim movie I watch

that I love remember every moment from I don't want to I don't want to see the fish's face when I I don't I don't need to see his face I'm into it what though you're into it okay I'm not okay that sounded bad I don't like it's I can tell that the product

like it feels like it's I have a better sense of what the product is if that makes sense your parents are just nodding and being like you got you finally get it this is what we fucking lived with for 30 years like part of you feel like oh I owe it to this fish to look it in the eye

hmm I mean it's not registering it right but like oh I should know the animal that this comes from like I shouldn't is that part of it or yeah I think I think it could I think it's nice to look you like to look at it in the face for some

reason that's not even an element like it's just that I know that the product is I know what the product oh I have a sense that it's fresh and then like eating it and deboning it and everything as you go is like kind of fun in the same way that dissecting a crab is fun yeah also you can pull a Heathcliff and just put it

down your throat and then pull out just the skeleton if you want to impress somebody I know you hated Heathcliff I do hate Heathcliff but he's got some good ideas let's get into this week's chain Rubio's how do people a San Diego native chain how do people out here feel about Rubio's applause if you have Rubio's fans

I'd say to me that seems like a mixed 70-30 approval disapproval sort of split it seems like people are mostly on board with it to read the crowd reaction yeah founded right here in San Diego at one point they used to be called the

Rubio's fresh Mexican grill they recently changed to Rubio's coastal grill so there's some headers has changed up a little bit great change yeah kind of lateral kind of lateral they you know one of the big fish taco popularizers in the US along with some other

chains and you know what they they are one of those chains I think one of the first ones that has that big salsa bar with all the fixings which is kind of a staple of all these concepts now I will say the first time I had a fish taco was actually at Taco Bell

Wow there was a time in the 90s when there was a very brief window and I don't know if it was a test market thing or whatever but one of the taco bells in Long Beach had fish tacos and I got it and I remember getting it and it was just like a fish stick within like a like one of their soft tortillas and you threw

it out the window because there was no fucking face to look at what is this yeah and I remember just thinking it was so weird and then when a later in life when I got an actual fish taco and it was also fried I was like oh I guess that was even though that was a Taco Bell version of

it that was that's still closer to what I to what a fish taco actually was than I thought which I assumed it was like grilled fish or something like that but usually it is something battered before we get into this chain Mary, Mitch are you guys how do you guys feel about fish tacos in the

abstract are you on board as seafood fans the fuck question is that how do you feel about fish tacos in general to force from this chain is that okay yeah I love fish I love battered fish tacos yeah I love them I love them I love them I never I never ate

fish tacos a lot growing up right but I like I like them a lot yeah I had never eaten them either I had never eaten them until I yeah California yeah California for same thing for me too I never I never have but I'm a big fan there's there's some that are

really great in Los Angeles which I think maybe makes it tough and in San Diego which which makes it makes it hard to when it's lower quality it's you know you're right that great yeah yeah definitely something where you want to where you want to make sure that fish is is solid

yeah well uh well I I'm I will say I will admit that I am a Rubio's fan this is like a place I will just go to I would just like I like Rubio's my lovely wife Natalie and I will sometimes make a trip out to Rubio's and so I had that bias

going in the meal I had was this past Tuesday went to the Marina Del Rey location I got a a two taco plate which comes with their no fried this is trademarked no fried pinto beans they specifically are like not refried beans and chips

you get two tacos with that that's so confusing the wording of that no fried pinto beans yeah you guys get the beans I do no no beans for Mary Mitchell beans beans yeah you know what I mean should have fucking thrown them in the fryer if you ask me all right beans refried beans are not

deep fried it's not like you're it's not like you're putting down some onion rings some beans in it but that sounds pretty good doesn't it folks does sound good some county fair is gonna have that is like something you can get on a dare they're gonna get the blue

rivet baby I like the beans I think they are like there's a lot of pepper in those beans like a lot of just like black pepper it's a it's a big element but I think they're good they're just like they basically just stew them for so long that they get mushy it's just funny

that there's a not good group of people here tonight yeah they came here to hear you say I like the beans the beans are good everyone the beans I like the beans I mean they didn't come here specifically to hear that

did anyone come here specifically for that wow everyone I stand corrected everyone everyone people are leaving right now satisfied we got what we paid for do they not do the refried beans because it's like

this is healthy are they just like we're so different my assumption is that it was it was born out of like the getting away from fried foods getting away from from oils of the the health con that health conscious era of the 90s that's my assumption coastal element coming

yes yeah so someone thinks you are wrong no big thumbs down from the first row what's your way what's your explanation they're just not okay there was no logic behind it they were just what's the answer

they're just not okay sorry yeah no that makes more sense it's a debate technique you can't come back no you're just wrong all right oh shit all right moving on but I do I do enjoy the beans they're

they're good and mushy they're satisfying in the same way that refried beans are maybe just a little lighter now here I like the we got one more in I like the beans they were they were they were they were okay they're they're they're at minimum fine they were they were a little they were a

little sludgy I mean like nothing right that's true I want I know I almost wanted to be kind of loose I want to get the individual bean going you know what I mean what I want some like pinto to feel those beans moving around in my mouth baby Jesus Christ I

tell you what I never go for beans be interesting I see beans on a menu I look the other way wow why they just don't oh my god all right sorry I don't know I I really

I don't mind the texture I don't mind the flavor I love I like baked beans actually but even then I'm I'll only eat them if they're put in front of me I won't like seek them out I don't seek out beans and I don't know why you know it's a good underrated mascot the bushes

baked bean dog oh god that dog he's a good dog a dog so great he's a he's a wise dog is his name he's a golden retriever someone knows Duke Duke Duke Duke oh man is he here

he must be a million years old at this point he's a he's a he's an intelligent I would like to have a combo with that dog listen to yourself try to get the beans recipe out

of him oh wait no it's the other way around he's always trying to get the beans recipe out of someone else right out of his out of his his dad or what is his owner what is his end game his mom and dad are humans I've read into the history of him but they

birthed a dog right and he talks so he has he like talks it goes to school and sort of a little situation what's that does he wear glasses or no um yeah I feel like I've seen him wear glasses in some segments maybe like

they're doing a little skit where he like had like a lab coat on you sort of being a little professorial the first commercial the first commercial is his mom his human mom giving birth to him I have not they show him they show him coming out and he's like well this is interesting

and that says bushes yeah oh god we're at the house of blues pull it together I went blue baby house of blues is also a good nickname for my house I'm Palmerston

the house of blues I'm a sad man folks I said blue balls I'm not masturbating they know the uh yeah that dog is awesome he's the best

alright moving on I love him do any of the buddies the buddies began to talk later on the buddies the air buddy franchise yeah okay so the buddies Mitch just looked at me so intensely I thought we were on the same page

I was like you know the air buddy she's like I don't know what you're talking about in the air buddy franchise air buddies a dog who plays basketball yeah people know who air buddies then later on there's little buddies right well you skipped a bunches I mean there's there's the whole

there's no he plays basketball he plays football and airbud to golden receiver oh yeah he plays soccer and airbud world pop he plays beach volleyball he goes through a bunch of different sports and then ultimately they have they have the buddy spin-off move air buddies

which is first the air the airbud puppies playing volleyball playing basketball rather and then they turn that franchise into just an adventure franchise which is so wildly off the original premise yeah but yeah they go to I've seen space buddies I've seen and I have seen

spooky buddies spooky buddies is spooky buddies is not as good I've seen spooky buddies is not as good hold on a second you think space buddies is better than spooky buddies it's a little it's a little easier to follow

and it's a little less scatological they do they start they have a fat dog in it they have like a plumper puppy he's not that fat but they just designate him as the fat puppy and they just sort of like they make him like he farts a lot in the later ones and I just like it that's not my which is bullshit I'm sick of those

fat we don't fart all the time right who's with me hahaha some other fat guy in the audience we're good we don't fart we don't fart all the time like that

that's what people came here to hear you say we don't fart all the time you know you're on an airplane you hear you you have this terrible smell yeah I feel like I'm getting the eyes constantly right I'm like I didn't fucking do that you are not I will say Mitch

there's a lot that I insult you about but you are a man who smells nice hell yeah I'm happy we didn't tell that stick story it's very funny to think of people looking at people when they smell like on an airplane especially because I feel like if that's happened with

okay if I've been in an airplane and I have smelled a fart the last thing I want to do is like look around and make eye contact with whoever did it because because I'm getting I'm eating shit for it half the time I'm trying to find the person and stare them down

but I have a question who like are you say you get eyes though are people like craning over like their seats and like looking at you and shaking your head I know what you do that's what it feels like I feel like in my mind

I don't fart on airplanes I think that's fucked up yeah don't do it yeah hold it in don't wear sweatpants I mean good luck good luck trying to people think here's the thing because it's very loud on an airplane there's all that ambient noise people think they can just

get away with it oh yeah but it's just like they're the you can't nothing mutes the smell in there if anything it amplifies it yeah go the lavatory go to the lavatory I'll make an eye so words out if you're fucking doing I'm gonna find you I'm gonna do it and also I hate that

when you go to a house and there's a dog or something right and then people think it's you it's the fucking dog why is everyone accusing me of this shit it's Duke it's fucking Duke the talking dog who did it it's the spooky buddy the fucking dog who's obsessed with beans

might be the culprit I there should be a Duke movie is what I want to say there should be a Duke movie that's a great idea that's a good idea that's better than so many other of these properties that have been turned into franchises oh Nick

the monster serial is gonna be they're making them into a next franchise they are they're making which is why you said that Nick said this at one point yes oh my gosh yeah I think this is a solid idea no chocolate

blueberry frankenberry and then also oh who am I missing yummy mummy that makes sense that's an easy kid yummy mummy that sucks yummy mummy like a little kid saying it's fucking perverted and weird right no one's making it perverted but you

pull them off the shelves is the premise that they have to escape the cereal box before they get eaten because they probably would do like a meta take in this day and a post lego movie they come out with some sort of meta thing where they know they're like in the real world

and they know their cereal mascots or something they talk about how random it is is that because you like escape room so much no no no I'm not forcing it I just think escapes are interesting we should put them in more movies but yeah that's a great idea

Duke movie is a great idea these are all home runs said to so dismissively these are all brilliant and I love I just I love the I like the beans as I mentioned the fish tacos

we're not just going to talk about beans so you have a choice with the fish tacos it's an old bean app we tricked you guys oh shoot I didn't prepare turn to the house of blues and the house of legumes

oh there was a boo now now we got now house of booze has been realized I get you there oh I hope it was your family they left they left at minute 12

so with the fish tacos you've got a choice between the original fish taco which is the battered cod white sauce, mild salsa and cabbage or the fish taco a speciale which also includes cheese cilantro, onion and a little bit of that guac I prefer the especiale but I got

the fish taco this time it's good it's very it's like it's really solid it's a really good execution especially the chain of a fish taco it just does the job well and then I paired that with a langostino lobster taco which is the

so langostino is a thing where it's actually it's not technically a lobster it's actually a type of crab and this is a big issue within the seafood industry but I won't spend too much time on that tangent no no no please go on the lobster taco has garlic herb better

and some of those has avocados and some cabbage cilantro onion and a chipotle sauce on a warm flour tortilla I just don't like the langostino that much I would have rather had a second fish taco the garlic sauce was nice and the warm flour tortilla actually

worked well holding up for these ingredients even though I normally prefer corn tortillas I just don't think this was just give me real lobster or don't fuck around with this langostino you know it's just like it's a half measure it sounds like the yeah I agree I agree yeah he's right

langostino sounds like a shitty guy who gets whacked in Goodfellas Jimmy langostino like it sounds langostino sounds fucking shit it sounds shitty inherently yeah and I agree with it give me real lobster I want I want I want the real deal

what did you guys get from a from an entree standpoint I got the taco trio or the trio the three I got the original fish taco the mahi mahi taco that's a grilled fish taco grill yeah

the shrimp taco and then I also got wild and I got the the steak and chicken gourmet taco wow which I have to say were out of this world they were incredible really they were so good what's the deal

what's the deal with these gourmet they sound just like nicer it had they had they have little bacon on it wow little bacon and they have they also like did something with the cheese where and I was like what is this where the cheese was like a sheet and it was

like it was like fried and like in the taco shell it was so good I had never had anything like that and so that's what I got the word that came to mind when I was eating that original fish taco because

I was like I got to describe this I have to talk about it and I was like fruity which I don't know if they would want me to say that but I can kind of get it because there was like a mangoey something or something yeah I mean like that the mild salsa

comboed with that with that cabbage slaw and then that that's it's kind of a sweet cream sauce a little bit of sweetness to it so I can kind of see that thank you Nick Mitch what did you do on your house I believed it she just she just gave me an intense stare well do you

believe me or not I do I believe it was sweet damn it I had I went with front of the show bug main split crowd on bug main he's not here and we'll never be at a live show

unless we can have someone whose sensors while we're doing a live show yeah like a seven second delay on anything bug main says but I can do a Kanye West doesn't like take everyone's phones before the fucking show starts he says some bad stuff anyways

I got a chicken quesadilla with chips in the pinto beans Nick and then I also got the lobster tacos the the langostino tacos and I did a San Diego favorite I got myself a fucking California

burrito baby that is it that is a thing they recently added to the menu they didn't use to have it with some fries in there and a bug main got an old natural chicken burrito I didn't have to say that we got a side of Mexican rice

and and then we can talk about other stuff because I also got a lemonade I just want to I'll get it out of the way the lemonade was fucking great wow it's a great lemon shell that's a great great lemonade there they do a good lemonade right I had

a little taste of the mango lime aqua fresca this that was that okay yeah I think you're in there in the ballpark and it was really good to there they knocked the drinks out of the park it was very surprising they were good anyways the California burrito was good here's

here's I agreed with you on the on the langostino tacos right they put they put that did they put the chipotle sauce on everything is that no it's not on everything it was in my California burrito oh interesting they may have seen me and been like this guy wants fucking sauce and he also farted

and I know that for sure it's a it's an interesting choice because they have that salsa bar with a lot of those salsas available for you to add on your own but they also put sometimes they put the salsa just on one of their burritos or tacos and hand it to you so

yeah yeah they're it's interesting that they do that it's all right keep going California burrito I I liked it it just didn't take because of the chipotle sauce it didn't take us like a real California burrito right it's their own take it was their own take on it so just kind of felt

like a mushy what's up um can you tell me I've never had a California burrito what what's in it I'm so sorry come on there's no reason to listen I knew I should say anything I shouldn't have said anything I'm a fucking idiot

but hey that's gonna change tonight right everyone yeah Nick and I in this crowd are gonna force you to eat one to night there's there's I mean this San Diego is the home to the best California burritos I'm not I'm not trying to get

it to now I'm not trying to get a pop there they are they are the best I love Juanita's up the hill here for in and Encinitas but you there's a lot of guys what do you think the best what is the best place to get a California burrito this is gonna be chaos

Roberto's Rita's Lolita's not Lolita's Lolita's Lolita's not Lolita's Lolita's Lolita's like the book

like the book that's not gonna help me what are you doing oh no Nick like the book what is like Lolita is the but is that what you're talking about Lolita's Lolita's

this is Karina's this is not working Karina you can't do the you can't ask for restaurant recommendations in the same method they use on the prices right just it doesn't work you can't pick from the crowd what people are saying Lolita's Karina's

Karina's like my mom thank you oh that's nice her name's Karina but whatever close enough same ballpark you should try one while you're down here I will I will yeah I would love to I will I will go to both of these places they are they are delightful but you didn't you didn't love this one Mitch

I didn't love it but I have I have high expectations maybe not the right thing to get the chicken quesadilla was great right they really knocked it out of the park the chicken quesadilla was great we knew we went to the Rubio's website and we were like which one of us are gonna get those fucking nasty

lobster tacos and we didn't talk to each other and we both got them like idiots that's I mean that's we each have a different a different perspective on the same thing yeah no no no I agree I agree 100% with you they just were kind of like I was looking for the chipotle sauce

because the langostino was like whatever what's it's not an issue if we get the same thing because we have our own opinions I know this is saying Cisco and Ebert should watch different movies it's fine to like what like I see what you're doing there but I'm gonna tell you right now I'm fucking Cisco

okay no way man I'm dying first I also got the I mentioned the Mexican rice was okay it was fine yeah well they they they specifically give you beans and chips they don't give you beans and rice which is like this kind of the standard

combo when we get to Salsas I got some stuff to sell oh interesting I also got a bean and cheese burrito which I'll say is just kind of like a very it's the thing I like to get sometimes is like a baseline of just like you know can they how is this very basic thing executed I think it's a good bean and cheese burrito it's it's got cheddar

jack and mozzarella cheese so it's a nice low blend there a lot of cheese it's like almost it's almost like quesadilla cheesy which I think is good for a bean and cheese burrito and you know a lot of it relies on those no fried pinto beans which I think are pretty good a little bit of mild salsa in there I kicked it up with some salsa verde yeah not bad a very very

solid bean and cheese burrito and they also got what we're talking about while you mentioned your lemonade I got a lemon lime custard which is one of their desserts was like a I think they called a lemon coconut bar and I had some it so was lemon lime custard layered between coconut

shortbread that was surprisingly good really they're really getting their lemon sweet treats done right there by the way what is about that since since we asked for people throughout the best California burritos I think there have been fights in the stands people are arguing there's something something crazy has happened

we shouldn't have done it you're right yeah I didn't do any desserts neck yeah I almost never get a deserted a chain restaurant or especially to fast food places because they're such an afterthought but they had a nice looking display there so I forget to try one it was not bad Mary what did you get besides the the taco

array did you get anything else um yeah I got well I just got chips and guacamole and then Matt who I went with got the langostino burrito I had a bite of it and I it wasn't my favorite either um and then but that was

it and then I got a Perrier so that's me but I didn't try any of the drinks or the desserts I'm kind of kicking myself for not trying that I didn't I mean I didn't try any other specific dessert drinks I just got a bodelo especial I got a little new dog um but the hell yeah

the uh this is 11 a.m. um but uh yeah I mean I like one thing you guys hit on it and I didn't actually I didn't get anything with a with a land-based protein um but they do do they they do do their land stuff well they do their their their beef and their their chicken are like

it's good there I think it's very solid I thought I thought they did a good job but I want to talk about sauces yes please go for it all right I got I got every salsa I tried every salsa of course uh the Chipotle and Verde slash Tomatillo uh was was great

yeah I like that too um and the Picante I thought was really good that's the that's the bright red one right the right red one that was great salsa yeah I got their mild salsa it tasted like fucking cocktail sauce mmm a little too sweet is that is that an issue is that is that just where I

what it is an issue why does it taste like cocktail sauce yeah I don't know might be a maybe a thing they did in the previous generation they added some sweetness to it and it just seems kind of old-fashioned exactly like cocktail sauce it was like a complete turnoff I was incredibly horny

until I had it I don't like knowing that you're around town walking into Rubio's horny I don't like knowing that I think people would rather me not be horny ever

but it was a complete turnoff it was uh yeah it was it was it was a vibe killer it was bad don't don't get the mild cock don't get the mild salsa it tasted it tastes like cocktail sauce yeah that's a bummer yeah I do think they're I do think they're they're salsa Verde and I do

think they're uh you know they're they're spicy one about the hot end if you're something of a heat seeker like me I think those ones are well executed and I'm there's a Diablo there was a couple in bottle yeah they go to the other ones were good yeah those are those people like those there was a there was a jalapeno and a Diablo

in the in the uh in bug name was like I'm gonna get Diablo and I was like what this it carries over into like you're that you like spiciness like you're like a bad guy that also likes hot stuff it's too many I should have had him explain that but anyways

I thought I thought the Diablo was good it wasn't too too spicy but it was decent right I like it was like the hot ones are kept in bottles we you can't even have it in like a little container definitely trying to make it put some separation so people don't actually don't accidentally do it actually accidentally have a faux pas if

you if you can't handle the spicy um but yeah I think it sounds like we had some some good varied experiences at Rubio's let's get to our final thoughts on this chain um so we will each go around and we will sort of give our summation our closing argument if you will and then rate this from

zero to five forks Mary you're our guest we'll begin with you okay great my closing argument is hey it's great you're looking for a good time it's fast it's good they also you can get alcohol there which is something like uh yeah which is

something where I go into a fast food restaurant and I'm I was like I've never seen beers on the wall like it really felt like oh I'm naughty they have alcohol here so I love that I love feeling naughty I I really I was thrilled with

everything that I tried like um the the Linguistic Burrito that I had a bite of I I even that I was like oh interesting tastes I guess you can say that about any food um and but so in summation um great go for it have a good time

trust yourself trust your heart love your friends and um be grateful I think that's perfect perfect I think I think you don't even have to give a fork rating at all oh yeah wait my fork rating um and I love

the gourmet taco so really try those if you haven't yet um and my fork rating ooh I give this a really the whole experience was so fun I give it a 5 4 wow wow oh man coming in hot I

really loved it well uh 5 4s no no no um um I I thought it was good I had a good time I had

a good time with it it did it what it what is Rubio's history I was listening to you before you told some weird story that I didn't even understand what was your opening it was uh it was started in San Diego where did you go to with that story

I started I I ended there I landed with Rubio's I started with Johnny Apple side oh Johnny Apple seed that's right and then when you lost me when you said the fish taco seed or something oh that's when you got me

uh Ralph it's Ralph Rubio is the guy who founded it and he just sort of started a local chain it grew into a few different locations a lot of these do and then and then expanded nationwide so it's kind of because it was just kind of the first of these chains right yeah I mean like a lot I think a lot of the

I think the Mexican chains for a while were like it was like Taco Bell and then whatever the local Taco Bell equivalent was it was it was this very like budget friendly uh pseudo bastardized version of of Mexican food and now it's become this this was like

one of the progenitors of like this this is a fresher slightly more somewhat more authentic take are you go first you review first here's what I'll say I'll also take my mic off the stand like Mitch yeah we're all taking our mics off the stand right now this is when we're getting

real oh my gosh how fun I'll hold it in my life you guys took the mic stands off the table I guess should I fall I guess I'll do it definitely it's something I don't know why I don't know why we're doing this faces now we're applause break

real weird applause break I I really like Rubios as I mentioned I'm a fan I think it is a it's a play it's a chain that I will go to on my own and that I have been to a number of times this year the podcast

aside and so it sounds like you're lying when you say this it's I'm telling the truth hook me up to a fucking lie detector test okay I'll pass a polygraph that's how the fucking the machines take over plug me in all right go ahead

keep going they have a good Tuesday taco night deal and you know that's that's worth taking into account it's a good value I think the the beans are solid I think the fish taco which is their their signature item and the fish taco especially I'll take your pick but I think

they're both home runs they're very they're great and they're really well done I think you know some of the seasonal items can be hit and miss the land-based proteins as I mentioned I think are well done I think just you know tacos burritos quesadillas they do well and what do you want

from a Mexican place what do you want and like Mary's point having tacos and burritos I guess yeah having the alcohol there is a nice bonus it's great you know as a guy wearing an NBA sweatshirt this rubios is more like

Ricky Rubio than that clown Marco Rubio no and for that reason I'm gonna go on the high end I'm gonna say four forks two times four and a half forks for rubios

go ahead Mitch alright oh Jesus I enjoyed my time there look there's a couple things that I should take into consideration one I went with bug main which probably brings it down about half a fork

in itself stop going to restaurants and watching Star Wars movies with bug main I enjoy I thought that they knocked the drinks out of the park here we go see it is you I'm nervous because I said far I far

I fart all the time whenever you say fart it means you fart it's a tell there's nothing there I don't I don't there I'll say it doesn't happen should I tell my story

of how I got sick yes I said to Nick this isn't a good story is anyone like is anyone still working on like a basket of mozzarella sticks or something because you might want to put that finish that quickly before he tells the story I'm on antibiotics

okay so I'm on antibiotics and I was about to jump into the shower I thought I had a little gas and yeah I shit a little log into my hand okay disgusting disgusting into your hand

did you just say into your hand you know like most people when you have to fart you put your hand behind your bare ass as a precaution please please I'm not proud of it

but what I was going to say is that you'll never feel more like a little kid than walking to the bathroom with a little poo in your hand it's the most I felt like a child since I was a boy so in that way it's kind of good it was nice

you're not explaining yourself thoroughly enough I took some antibiotics side effect is that it fucks your stomach big time stop what I'm asking about why did you have your hand ready to receive

I said oh my stomach I got a little bit of gas it happens to all of your pieces of shit yes of course so I did that and I said wait a minute I put my hand behind oh oh I did and that was a reaction it wasn't there as a precaution I guess

I was like fucking mookie bets I caught that thing it was lucky didn't hit the floor man and more like dookie bets alright we did it we did it oh no anyway if you guys are at the meet and greet after the show

and want to shake Mitch's hand yeah I didn't wash it since then I washed it a hundred times over I know I trust you did you're a hygienic man I'm a hygienic man sometimes you just shit in your hand every so often right anyway continue with

your review of this restaurant anyway I was going to say 3.75 forks I was going to hold on hold on you get run out on a rail hold on hold on go lower wow

wow some people hate it Mitch the lemonade was good I think you should speak your truth because we did have a live show in Vancouver where you thought it was a two forker and you said four forks just because you didn't want to make this is bullshit I think you should be honest and just say what is in your heart

and I trust you I know you're an honest man wait so did rubios create fish tacos no it did not it absolutely did not yeah some people say yeah it was created in Baja California right this was something that was that was taken from people in Ensenada this wasn't something that was that originated in the US

right so so I mean like but maybe but I think that I think Ralph Rubio and his chain had a hand in popularizing it I think they can take care of it for that some credit in terms of popularizing it to alright the person who the person who just likes to say no when I say something is chiming in

I like Rubio's a lot yeah four forks four forks welcome to the Golden Plate Club Rubio's well-earned well San Diego's own folks that was our review of Rubio's

it's time for a segment we've got a beverage we're gonna decide if it's worth pouring down your throat it's another edition of drank or stink Emma if you please yeah you song ladies and gentlemen oh my god this is be Sprite

alright so our producer you song for a second some cranberry Sprite for us you can't do this where you just end it after you tell everyone to make their Christmases be Sprite we've got a can for each of you guys here why did you end on an up note

that's just the way the melody goes you want yeah that's the way the melody goes I was trying to follow the backing track there's like a little guide track on there it's because it was actually the first that was the first verse which is not what these lyrics are sing up to

but it was easier than trying to have a specific cue that this would cue up to so when you yell at me for not doing when you yell at me for not doing stuff for the show it's basically like what you just did yeah you should do more of that do more do more half-assed song parodies

people have to sit through so we've got some Sprite Cranberry I was going to ask what do people think of a Patreon tier where you song spoon feeds you green tea ice cream would you sign up for that you song they like it

alright it's happening Sprite Cranberry Sprite Cranberry Zero I have never had this my lovely wife Natalie was very nice to procure this for us Ralph thanks Ralph's thank you thank you Natalie have either of you guys had the Cranberry Sprite

in either iteration before no never I've never had it no I've never had it either I know LeBron James is selling it alright alright so it makes me not want to like it wow

my Celtic span come on great NBA player yeah and I know that you love the NBA itself one of the best because you love Rubios are you going to get a sweatshirt that says Mexican food why are you wearing that I love Rubios what

Mary you have not had this no I have not Mitch have you had Cranberry Sprite before this is our maiden consumption of this and there are a few stray cans that I think you song is distributed to the audience so a handful of people have them out some of you should replace this

with whatever you're drinking sober up a little bit yeah pass them around you guys don't care to share one can of Sprite between all of you Jesus Christ it's interesting this I've just had the full sugar

Sprite so far the full sugar Sprite Cranberry the Cranberry is subtle it's not played like super forward am I wrong no I think you're right but I will say my first thought in tasting it was this tastes like a gusher

wow yes yes it absolutely is you know the red gushers right but then also like I don't want a gusher to be Cranberry flavored either what's the word it's tart right it's a little tart yeah yeah

I don't know I boy you know I'm gonna try the Sprite Zero Cranberry and then I'm gonna have an assessment and is this supposed to be like a Christmas it seems like they're pushing it for Christmas yeah yeah I think so why because cranberry sauce is a big Christmas thing

well yeah I mean also that is yeah I guess so yeah yes alright yeah you know that checks out you're right wait a minute what is up with all this candy cane shit I'm seeing around this time of year

Sprite with a dash a hint of mint I feel like would be oh that would be nice I feel like that's better I don't know it seems it's weird to me yeah I mean it is weird it's I get why it's a seasonal gimmick because this is not an everyday soda by any stretch of the imagination

what happened it came out came out of my mouth oh was your hand there to grab it I'm sorry I felt I felt terribly safe you did share the story it's not on me I said to Nick backstage

I'd share that story if the show was going bad which shows that we just always think the show is going bad right I actually this is weird I think I like the scram cranberry zero better interesting than I like the regular I was surprised by how

how not like because always there's this weird sort of like after taste when you have the diet version of the zero version but this this doesn't have that this is very very similar to full sugar absolutely right this is one of the least

deity yeah of the zeros I've had weird I don't know it I think I like the full sugar better but I think the cranberry zero is a very nice execution yeah I'm gonna I'm gonna make a judgment call and I'm going to say

these are not an everyday drink but they are very much a drink and I think they execute the cranberry side they live up to what they're trying to be these this tastes like a cranberry version of Sprite it's not too forward I think this is this is a pretty good this is a pretty good Bev Mary what do you

think I really like it and I really uh yeah I could see I could see myself ordering this on on a holiday especially you know this is something that I really think is fun is when there's a drink that tastes fruity

or something and it's clear oh yeah that is fun is that what a treat and now you can't really see it because it's in a can we're in a can we are in a can but but if you were to like be at a cocktail party or something you had a little glass with like

Nick is pouring the Sprite into the water bottle oh yeah there you go and and you're certified clear wow people didn't believe it how did they do it not a hint of cranberry color right I'm just really surprised but I think

that's super fun I like I said I like to engage with my foods and my drinks in my rooms well guess what I disagree with both of you I want to see what I'm drinking right everybody if I'm getting cranberry

I want the color of cranberry these are two this is stank both of them for me wow stanks two stanks is it just is it really just the cranberry element like you think doesn't work or I just don't think it tastes good I like regular Sprite better

yeah I like regular Sprite is so refreshing and it really is so refreshing and this is not refreshing necessarily it's it's it's it's flirty yes I agree with that and also this is maybe

this is maybe a good cocktail so yeah I can see that yeah so Nick you'll have a blast with this Christmas morning drink that's 80% vodka with a splash of cranberry Sprite atop it counts Natalie

it's a mixed drink what about those of you who tried it in the audience shout it out if you think it's a drink and the stank contingent now's your time to be heard it feels 50-50 it was funny that the stank people did sound

whineier stank is a hard word to not say whiney but right stank we don't like it I agree I'm stank stank all the way there you go there's our split that was Drake or Stank

but right now just like a restaurant we value your feedback let's open up the feedback if anyone has any questions a microphone stand our engineer Emma is flying into the audience just queue up there any questions at all we'll take a few from you guys

before we wrap it up it looks like we have one no questions about how I caught the shit by the way yeah sit back down buddy it's like we have one two three people queuing up is that what I look like that cartoon there yeah that's a spitting image

oh my gosh we'll try to get through the people currently in line and I think that's where we'll have to cap it off for time reasons hi up front in the spoon man t-shirt what's your name what's your question I'm Ricky

do you guys think there's an underserved cuisine that can blossom into a chain wow that's a good question Ricky that's a great question thank you Ricky wow

everyone else in line go home follow that no that's a great question I love Indian food and I would be if there was like an American chain that's kind of like a slightly mainstreamed version of Indian food

that's easy to eat on the go I mean that would be that feels like a natural thing because I don't think there are any Indian chains in the US that's an opportunity what do you guys think this is hard it is hard I will say a cuisine that I love

that I have only experienced when I've gone to little Ethiopia in Los Angeles is Ethiopian food it is so good so I think that would really benefit I think that would be gotta get that to a wider audience

I agree with that that's a great one I'm gonna say I want instead of a road soda I want some road eggs benedict like eggs benedict you can eat in your car the taste of eggs benedict in a little cup

in a cup why does it have to be in a cup you take it on because you can put it in your cup holder and you eat it on the road babe eggs benedict flavored shake no I don't want it to be a shake it's not cold first of all

are you just like opening your mouth and chewing whatever hits it how are you eating it that is a way to do it you get like a spork or something open faced cup that's what I call a cup without a lid and

you spoon in the eggs benedict wow look you can't get eggs benedict unless you gotta sit down at the damn restaurant yeah what's wrong with that it's an occasional it's not an everyday food I'm an on the go guy wager

I want eggs benedict to go it's good it's a good idea alright next question hi what's your name what's your question hi Robert I'm wondering like nowadays there's a lot more menus where they put the calories on right

and I've kind of learned that like I can't have an Italian sub I go to get a sandwich I'm wondering if you've had any other kind of rude awakenings with this calories that they're telling you nowadays the fucking cheesecake factory salads they are so caloric it's so great there's a

there's a Thai salad they have a cheesecake factory that's got it's delightful and it's like fucking 1700 calories oh my god yeah you can't have it there's no point you might as well get fucking fettuccine alfredo because it's the exact go nuts it's crazy

you know what drives me crazy is when it's such a range it's like it's either zero calories or ten thousand right it depends on what you get like it's like very like well what goes with what yeah I just I was confused because

like the prestige is man it disappeared it's right there oh there he is alright good I was I was scared he was gone and an instant in the flash I thought it was some sort of devil trickery he walked back to his seat was it devil trickery

or was it magic wow yeah I'm with you on the on the like Wendy's when it's like whatever this could be like 400 calories or 1300 I'm like I know it's gonna be 1300 I'm gonna somehow go over somehow like I know I'm gonna get it over

the default version tell me how much that is tell me the average yeah that's a good answer I have nothing to add next question hi what's your name hi I'm Renita I have a question and a brief suggestion oh boy stop doing live shows

don't ever have Mary back never to you sorry you brought it up so my question is what would you guys mount potato morby your favorite preparations of potatoes

right you know 20 ways to do it mine starts with mashed potatoes tater tots hash browns scalloped potatoes so just curious what your favorite potatoes are this is great are you gonna give us your suggestion now sure my suggestion is

to do an episode where you blind taste test stuff I'd love to see if you can tell the difference without the branding of a plain cheese burger between McDonald's Burger King etc if you don't know this is a really good idea here's what I'll say

I yes easily I can do I if you gave you make if you gave me McDonald's Burger King Wendy's what else would you throw into that mix Carlos Junior Hardee's I feel like is in the big Carl's Junior kind of throws a wrench

in the thing you don't normally get just a default cheeseburger from Carlos your heart I think I could still do it that's a great idea yeah that's a very good idea yeah we'll do it probably next week we're out of ideas French fries would be good too fries yeah it's more challenging that's nuance we're needed you want you songs job

I'm open to it I didn't mount potato more fries yeah right baked potato hash browns I'm with you yeah boy that fourth that's sweating that's tough

I think I'm gonna say mashed potatoes why not they're just so solid you're never dissatisfied to see mashed potatoes on your plate I was I thought you were gonna go plain uncooked potato raw potato french fries for sure number one always and forever love you french fries

baked potato definitely tater tots and hash browns that's good I'm gonna go mashed potatoes first mashed potatoes with the best potato some of the audience went

awww it's so disappointing it's taken the Lincoln slot I guess it's like the most esteemed of them who are the other three on there? you got Teddy Roosevelt, you got Washington you got Jefferson you got Al Gore

yeah Gore's on there I know he didn't win but it would have been nice to put him out there I'm gonna go mashed potatoes french fries are number two baked potato and you ready for the my fourth?

Mr. Potato Head the children's toy no home fries I like home fries we had a conversation about this recently I like home fries when they're really well made over hash browns it's just such a crap shoot so often you just get

like a subpar breakfast potato so can I say good home fries? good as a sum thank you next question so we're here in obviously the southern most point of California I consider myself a SoCal surfer dude hell yeah

party on you guys both seem like SoCal surfer dudes the exact same vibe and disposition pretty much so I was just wondering if you guys were to plan the most SoCal day what would that day consist of and conversely Mitch if you don't want to answer this

what would be the most New England day food whatever wow that's an excellent question it depends on how much you associate southern California with disneyland because that can be a big thing but if you want to avoid disneyland

I would say like a don't you want to hit up some of the different the different climates you can drive to you start at the beach and you end up in the mountains you start you what you fucking hit the waves in the morning you hit the slopes in the evening that's part of the appeal of California then you go to the high desert

and you have your fucking sleep overnight in a tent seems like you've never done that before I've been intense intense but you guys got any thoughts on the ultimate SoCal showdown no I mean I still feel like I'm getting

acquainted with SoCal so I don't feel educated enough to answer this I'm not from the area I will say there are great escape rooms in Anaheim okay go ahead my answer is except you can't do it anymore but my answer

would be the best SoCal California day would be to go to disneyland and get yourself on soren California and you can see all those climates while you're in one ride smell oranges they shoot orange mist at you

that's I think that's you know what I would say that I would have to be here's what I would say you got to get yourself a burrito somewhere get some local Mexican food and then you go to the Hollywood Bowl and you see a show what's the concert you go and see Nick

Dave Matt not from Southern California you see the sublime tribute band at the Hollywood Bowl see a little sublime with Rome playing mostly new stuff New England days I don't know I'd hang out

in my basement in Quincy and get drunk watch a movie with my mom and that's it alright a few more questions gentlemen of the heat seekers shirt hi what's your name what's your question hi I'm Brian I just wanted to say first of all thanks big fan I appreciate all the laughs every month thank you Brian yeah as far as questions

I don't mean to insist on your personal life but I would personally love to hear your lovely lovely wife Natalie on the podcast will we ever get to hear her that's a discussion she's shaking her head now that's a yeah I don't want to make it direct

I can't with her I don't want anyone to know who she is she doesn't want to be associated with this I won't look back over at her sometimes I would ask that question yeah that she's not a public figure but that's you know we absolutely think we could figure out if she's down for it

maybe we had your mom on the show that was nice she wants to come back she wants that's the entire time I was home for Thanksgiving she's like get rid of Nick he's no good I should be your co-host that's a lie she didn't really say that

I would love to have Natalie on it would be great it would be great to have her on her company more than your company I've said this before she's a more pleasant person than you she's more sociable here's what I'll say I would never blame her I don't think she'll ever come on because

who would want to come on she's made a great choice so far by not coming on and she has to deal with this shit all the time she's great and she's got some great snacks for the shows and stuff like that too so if she wants to the invitations there you guys could certainly bond over my inadequacies

we do a few more questions here hi what's your name what's your question hi I'm Aaron so I'm visiting from Canada last night I went to In-N-Out Burger for the first time everyone always raised about it

so you know I really wanted to oh Jesus but no it's not about that but In-N-Out's aren't always in the most convenient locations so I sort of had to go out of my way so this leads to my question which is have you ever had to put in a lot of

effort excluding like stuff you do for the podcast to make like a pilgrimage to a specific chain restaurant or place you wanted to try out oh hell yeah we I mean for the show we've driven to Victorville California twice

which is you guys know the geography down here but for people who are listening around the globe it's like a five hour drive from LA we had to go quite a bit inland I won't spoil anything but on Tuesday Nick and I are heading to LAX

for something for the podcast yes that's something you could which sucks it sucks so we've definitely gone out of the way for the show itself for the closest thing I can think of is I once went 40 minutes in college

to get dip in dots the ice cream of the future not worth it absolutely not worth it and that's what you went 40 minutes for yeah that was my college experience please tell me that you went alone I had some friends

I talked some people into it anything come to mind for you guys yeah I drove I really wanted some red lobster you know I'm getting those crab legs and I there wasn't one like in our or maybe there was

I didn't know about it in Arcadia at the time which is closer to LA so I drove north of Santa Clarita from LA which is a good 45 minutes or so just to have a little just to have a little crab so that was a lot

I'll go into the north end to get pizzeria Regina which I heard someone's wearing a pizzeria Regina shirt tonight oh you're there of course you're wow someone has been flung on stage they didn't have two exels

this is a two excel pizzeria Regina t-shirt hell yeah wow as someone who's well versed in magic that was magical that was amazing that was really something

what a reveal hell yeah one more california burrito and this thing isn't going to fit me I I haven't done that I haven't gone too too far I'll do things where I'm like if it's on the way I'll go out of my way to get it we're doing a live show in

phoenix and I'm going to go to I went on a later flight than wagra so I could enjoy pizzeria buano but I think the more embarrassing answer I have is that I was at Taco Bell and I got to the drive through window I may have mentioned this before

and they forgot my cheesy gordita crunch and I was like hey I ordered a cheesy gordita crunch he was like no you didn't and I was like yeah I did trust me and he was like no you didn't and I was like well can I get one here and he's like no you're going to have to go back through the line again and I was like

and then I did and I was like oh and then I went to the window he was like Taco Bell how can I help you I was like cheesy gordita crunch I'm the guy from a few seconds ago and I went up and I got it and he was like you didn't order a cheesy gordita crunch I ordered nothing

that's the most embarrassing thing I've ever done awesome thank you so much two more questions here hi what's your name what's your question hi I'm Brett Brett you're wearing a tari shirt thank you very much I'll keep this one quick fuck mary kill

Ronald McDonald the Burger King and the Taco Bell Chihuahua give me give them to me in that order I'm mary the Burger King I'm royalty oh yeah Burger King Ronald McDonald and the Taco Bell Chihuahua

Nick I'm surprised you didn't go with oh I guess you fucked Ronald you fucked the clown no here's the thing I don't want to have sex with or marry a dog but I also don't want

to kill a dog I mean there's no win situation here I got my order I fucked Burger King I'd kill Ronald McDonald and I would marry that dog that's cute as hell

honestly that's mine too walking down the aisle in that in a bridal veil chihuahua that would be adorable and people would think that like oh and his vows would be you'll kiddo marry you and people would also see me and the dog

and be like that's a good couple like they're like they're both like they're good for each other no yeah thanks buddy do you have an answer or no you freak all three at the same time

kill all three at the same time you're gonna need a bigger boat one more question hi what's your name hi my name is Sarah what's your question for us so I have two things and a question sprite as ice cubes in your holiday mmm that's a good idea

love that and the cheek of a fish is the best that actually is that's actually a good point there's a fish cheek I just saw who was clapping for the fish cheek it was your lovely wife Natalie was the one person in the crowd

clapping for fish cheeks she's right she's right and so are you Sarah and the question is have you ever watched a movie where you've seen them cook a dish and you're like oh I really have to have that and you go out to either make it or you go out to find it and what movie was it

that's a really good question oh man that's a really great question all the films I've seen you know what the honestly ratatouille the ratatouille and ratatouille makes you want to you want to eat the rat you sick bastard clearly that's not what I said she's talking about a dish that was prepared

I don't want to eat the rat because I see the rat cooking my mind doesn't work like yours so what do you want to eat you want to eat the ratatouille the dish that he makes it's the name of a dish the rat is not named ratatouille just like the legend of Zelda the main character is not Zelda the title does not

reflect what the character's name is necessarily all right fine relax his name is Remi and no I don't want to eat Remi but yeah the ratatouille and ratatouille looks delectable I have an opposite answer and since it's the holidays you know on Christmas vacation

when they open up the he cuts the turkey open oh yeah and it's all dry inside that always fucking gross me out as a kid I wouldn't want to eat that right I've talked about before how I wanted to like when I was younger I used to I drew a train I've talked about this before

this I wanted to train when I was younger like a train that like one cart had it was filled with Doritos and then one cart was filled with coca-cola and like one was filled with gummy bears and then I would go from cart to cart just like jumping in

and jumping and swimming through them you wait so you just in your imagination you were jumping through them it was yeah no in my imagination I mean like if it was real I would do that as well okay I got it yeah you weren't putting this on the floor like a twister board and like physically jumping through it

no no no no no that's crazy you looked at me like you're a concerned I just feel so bad I'm just kidding no that sounds wonderful the the movie that um Richie Rich everyone knows that everyone loves it he had a McDonald's in his basement

that always made me be like oh my god that's great the ultimate ultimate kid fantasy absolutely awesome thanks for your questions there thank you so much guys that's our show thanks so much for coming out give it up for Mary Holland

the Spoon Man Mike Mitchell Nick Weigher our engineer MR producer Yu Song and Nick until next time for the Spoon Man Mike Mitchell I'm Nick Weigher happy eating see everybody thank you for coming bye hey Spoon Nation

and Burger Brigade catch the Doe Boys live before the end of 2018 Mitch and I will be in Phoenix on December 13th for tickets and info go to headgum.com slash live don't make us perform for no one

that was a headgum podcast