Doughboys - Subway 2 with R.J. Fried

Episode Date: August 1, 2019

The 'boys are joined by writer R.J. Fried (Late Show with David Letterman, Triumph's Election Special 2016, Our Cartoon President) to talk Pennsylvania eats before discussing our return trip to one of the largest chains in the world, Subway. Plus, another edition of Snack or Wack, and this month's installment of the Golden Paw Club! Want more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When I first got there, I was like, man, you guys have got it made in here. I couldn't even believe it was a prison. It's more like a daycare than a prison. This was former inmate Mark Brooks, as quoted in the Daily Mail, describing the Federal Correctional Institution in Inglewood, Colorado, the facility that houses Jared Fogle. Fogle, the former fast food spokesman who credited a sandwich diet with his massive weight loss, is currently serving a 15-year sentence for child pornography and child sex tourism, a length of time that parallels the 15 years he spent as the real-life mascot

for the world's biggest fast food chain. It's difficult to overstate Fogle's ties to the sandwich brand, in addition to being the bespectacled face of the franchise in some 300 commercials. He guest starred on SNL and made appearances for WWE, appeared as himself in the film Jack and Jill, and acted in the Sharknado franchise. Even tragically, whether the chain that employed him was completely in the dark or chose to turn a blind eye, one can draw a line from the unexpected fame and fortune Fogle was granted and his access to young victims.

Fogle had established the Jared Foundation in 2004, a charity purportedly intended to fight childhood obesity. But in fact, almost all of its money was allocated as salary for the Foundation's executive director, Russell Taylor, who himself is currently serving a 27-year sentence for child exploitation. As a DOJ spokesperson said at the time of Fogle's arrest, what we found in Russell Taylor's home and on his computers led us to Jared. At Fogle's sentencing in November of 2015, Judge Tanya Walton Pratt said, quote, the level of perversion and lawlessness exhibited by Mr. Fogle is extreme.

And so now the man who made millions proudly contrasting his new slender frame with his old 62-inch pants is confined to a minimum security prison equipped with a movie theater and tennis courts where he's passed the time by earning a degree in culinary arts. This week on Doe Boys, we return to Subway. Welcome to Doe Boys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Nick Weiger, alongside my co-host, director of Fahrenheit 7-Eleven, Michael Samore, Mike Spoon-Mitchell. That was courtesy of Xavier Poraz.

You called me Michael Moore, who I don't look like. Or possibly Javier Poraz. You got an X in there. I'm not sure how it's pronounced. And I'm also not sure how Poraz is pronounced. So I apologize for butchering your name. ProSpoonMan at gmail.com is the address. And again, if you want your name said right, just include genetic pronunciation like our

buddy Sean Sakimai. He does that. Mitch. I know last week we had a little bit of a contentious thing where I called you Michael Moore and then I apologize for it. A lot of people sent in Michael Smore or some interesting. You apologize for it. And then you read or variants of that.

I included that. I think this was the cleverest Xavier Javier, however you pronounce his names. I thought that I thought his version of it. He put a little English on it. So I liked it. I don't tell your deepest darkest secrets. What? I don't tell your secret.

I mean, I don't like make fun. I'm saying I don't like make fun of you. Whatever. I make fun. But it's not your deepest darkest secret that you're a large man. It's kind of front and center. It's front and center, huh? Look who's talking.

Fucking fat ass. I've gotten bigger. I'm a heavy guy right now. I'm at the heaviest I've been for a while. We talked about this last week. I've mentioned, but you know, there's all this talk of documentary filmmakers or flashpoints for controversy got me thinking, we have not discussed Super Size Me is returning this in theaters this fall Super Size Me 2, Holy Chicken from Morgan Spurlock finally got a

release date. This thing was filmed a few years ago. It's finally coming out this year. Just like Jared, we've always hated Morgan Spurlock. This is true. We don't like Morgan Spurlock. I was okay. I was okay with Super Size Me when I saw it the first time because I was like, oh, that's

kind of fun. And it was kind of a wishful moment thing. Like I'd be fun to eat McDonald's for 30 days, which I think was not the point of his documentary. Yes. No. But it's just like, oh, he's just got that one gimmick. Like he literally had a show called 30 Days where he just did shit for 30 days.

And then like a lot of it turned out to be a shitty guy, he turned out to be a shitty guy. He's self-metooed. And then he, and then he like made this, he just like eventually was so out of ideas. He's just like, well, a lot of people do is like, well, shit, I'll make a sequel to the only thing I ever did that had any success. And it's what the fuck is Holy Chicken upon on? I don't know.

It doesn't make shit. It doesn't even make sense. Holy Chicken. That expression. It's stupid. Fuck you. I'm going to see your, we'll probably see your bullshit movie for fucking double or something. Yeah.

We'll probably see it for a Patreon episode. All our listeners will be funny and good. You know, people say that dough boys is people are like, ah, it's over. The good days are over. Who says that? A lot of people. No one's saying that. You know what?

I want to stay off the subreddit. No, it's not just the subreddit. My mom is telling me your mom's telling you that. Nick, I just want to say that dough boys phase two is coming. We have a bunch of phases coming of dough boys. I'm not aware of phase two, phase two, phase three, phase four. We've been in phase one this whole time. Phase three is a dough boys animated show.

Yeah. We've been in phase one for a really long time. This is so you were in charge of this because we've been in phase one for four years. This is about your pace for doing things. Anyway, how to spoo. You know what? I'm going to change. You know what?

I'm the artist formerly known as Spoon. No. Oh, God. Jesus Christ. What? The joke from 1993. I'm the artist formerly known as Spoon. I saw that joke in print in a Newsweek magazine.

You don't like it? Just, I mean, I guess it's enough time as fast or out. It's like kind of an ironic take on this like old joke. You are telling me you don't like this joke. Yeah, I don't think it's a good joke. I think it's well worn down. It seems like Posteroni to Desperado. Oh, that's good.

No, it's not. I like that. That's my point is that you suck. And I suck too. Of course. I'm now the hardest formerly known as Spoon. Why don't I eat you with sauces? My stomach tosses when I eat you out the can.

Posteroni. So you love Posteroni. I love it. All right. Here's a little drop for everybody. Fine. I won't. You can be the artist formerly known as Spoon.

Yeah, I am the artist. You are the artist formerly known as Spoon. All right. Here's a drop. Los Angeles, 1997. It's the hottest summer on record. Pollution is choking the city as bad as things are. They're about to get worse.

Welcome to Doe Boys. Much worse. I'm Nick Weiger. Predator 2. He's in town with a few days to kill. I'm not a predator. I actually like that one. I mean, given our topic.

I was thinking on the sequel to Jared. Oh, yes. Hey, Mitch, I made a drop for you. I hope you like it. It's a per singer drop. Oh, Robert, per singer. I hope you're having a good summer. Thanks, Robert.

Good to hear from you. Always killing it with the drops. All right. Well, that bullshit's over with. What the hell are you doing? I think I got this Apple watch and it's giving me a drop. It looks like you're something weird under the table, by the way. No.

Just to give you a heads up. I was adjusting my Apple watch under the table. All right. Well, cut the shit, you fucking dork. Here's the issue. Hey, you know what? Our guest has an Apple watch, too. Why don't you call him a dork to his face?

But he's not a dork. He's cool. He'll fucking pound you. He's a former hockey player. He'll fucking pound you first. I have this Apple watch and it's got what? It's got this Nike wristband. I was an NCAA athlete.

Hey, you rode crew. I rode crew. Yeah, that's right. I mean, anyone could sign up. Our guest is an Emmy nominated writer for the late show with David Letterman and Triumph Summer Election Special 2016. He's currently the showrunner and executive producer of our cartoon president, which you can check out on Showtime.

RJ Freed. Hi, RJ. Hi, guys. Thanks for having me. Thanks for being here. It's exciting. A bi-coastal man. Yeah.

We were talking at Subway Mitch before you arrived. Why are you going to say that? RJ is working in New York and he's living in LA. It's a little dig. You're trying to have a little dig. We had about, you know, 20 minutes to kill while we were waiting for you to arrive. So we had a little bit of a conversation. First of all, I had a long day today.

Yes. So that's not fair. Right off the bat. It's not fair. I had a long day too. We're both working. I had to come home and go to the bathroom. I told you this secretly.

Well, now you just told him on the podcast. Yeah. Would you want to know? I know your thing, Nick. Yes. I know that you liked your piss edger, which we talked about before. Come on. Jesus Christ.

It's true. We've talked about this. We did talk about this. He was like, man, I really got a piss. And I was like, oh, do you want me to get off of the X and he's like, no, that's okay. And he smiled. No, wait, no, wait, hold on. This is a mischaracterization.

I can't do, I can't think if I have to pee. Yeah. I mean, as we know. Yes. I went twice before I got here. Yes. I'm so glad it's the first thing I've said. I had to urinate very, very badly.

I know. We talked about piss edging as a thing because I had to urinate so badly that we had to pull out the road. I didn't say it was a thing that I liked. No, you're like, keep driving. And then you're still smiling. You could smile. Yeah.

I, because I remember, because we went over this bit backstage, we're going to maybe talk about this when we're going to do Hodgman's festival. Turns out not the place to do it. Not the place to do it. We went out there. The crowd hated us. And then we were just like, all right, we'll not do that. We'll just, we'll save this for a different context.

I shot this morning, Nick. My call time was seven AM. Yeah. I went back to the, that I've had an audition at four PM and I went to my trainer at five PM and I came home and used the bathroom for God's sakes and then I came over to you. Emma came here. We, we, I was, I also fucked up and showed up here at six 30 and fuck mitch's schedule up a little bit.

Well, no. Emma, you were, you were great. Nick is the one who's a little baby crying about it over there. So you left Emma locked in your apartment with your bathroom, leaving my bathroom leaving the doors on the way out. It was weird. He had shit in the middle of the table. Yeah.

Sorry about that, everyone. Tented for termites. RJ, thank you for being here. Mitch, I will, we won't dwell on you, you being a little bit, a little bit late, but I do want to talk about. We're not going to dwell on it. But RJ, we were talking a little bit before the show. You are in addition to, to spent working in New York, living in LA, you're dealing with

that, that, that, that a lot. You are originally from a small town in Pennsylvania. Yes. Small town, 14,000 people. It was the hometown of Jimmy Stewart. Wow. It was, it's an old coal mining town. And yeah, I mean, I feel like as I started to dig back through, there was, I mean, just

like 15 fast food places just immediately came to mind. There was just so much of my childhood. What did you, what did you have there in Indiana? Okay. McDonald's, Burger King. John Silver's, which actually. Could you mind, would you, would you just say him in the Jimmy Stewart voice, please? Oh God.

McDonald's. I can't do it. Oh yeah. Oh, there it is. It looks like this. I was a Jew too. So we didn't, we just got to deny it as it existed. McDonald's, I was a Jew.

McDonald's, Burger King, Lawn, John Silver's, Arby's, KFC, Dominus Pizza, Pizza Hut, Dunkin' Donuts, Subway, obviously, Dairy Queen, Rally's, Checkers. Oh yeah. People have heard of. And then a big night out was Denny's. Wow. A big night out was Denny's. A big, in my memory, Denny's was a special night.

Wow. Yeah, you go out. That's interesting. Get a Caesar salad. And then you go home and you shit on Jimmy Stewart. That sucks. Yeah. Were you a big Jimmy Stewart fan, Nick, back in the day?

No. I mean, what are you saying? Because I was born in the 20s. Yeah, that's good to say. What changed? I'm a very old man. Yes. I mean, in a way, I was implying that.

No. I don't know. I saw fucking. It's a wonderful life. It's a wonderful life. And that's all I knew until later. And then I was just like, oh, he had other movies, like, you know, like any actor. He had other movies, but I didn't really see any of them until adulthood.

I hope no Clarence shows up when you're on the edge of a bridge, by the way. I hope you can fucking your guardian angel lets you jump off. And you'll see my life without you. I'll be fucking buff and cool. If he tried to push you off, though, he's a ghost, right? Yeah. Your hands would go right through you. Yeah, I guess your guardian angel couldn't push you off the bridge.

He could just encourage me. Just tell me to do it. No, it's all the push I need. I know that. I've been out here a week. You're gonna jump. Sick of being a ghost. Mitch, could this be a sketch as Clarence shows up, but it's Clarence from the E Street

Band? No. It could be a sketch, right? I do. I like that a lot. We'll do that. Maybe he's waiting for the next suicide jumper. Oh, that's good.

Yeah, that's good. That's like a smarter take. It's like, I'm not your... Yeah. I like that. Yeah. But he's still Clarence with this accent. Well, okay.

Is that a hat on? Sure. Yeah. RJ, just keep it. It's great. It's funny. It's Clarence. Let's do it.

Didn't I pitch you? It's a wonderful life sketch, and I can't remember where it is now. It was funny. I can't remember. Oh, well, we'll fuck it then. I can't remember where it was. I can't remember it at all. Nick, you know what I'm going to say?

Yes. RJ, are you a size large? Yeah. I'm actually... I'm on a diet, and I'm going to get there. Wow. All right. Yep.

We got for you some manscaped boxers and a manscaped t-shirt. Oh, my God. The whole reason I came. This is your door prize. You can take this home. This is your door prize. Wear it with pride. You can take it, and you can leave now if you want.

If you think this is going to go poorly, you can leave now. No, I'm excited. No, we're not going to let you leave also. You need to stay. So wait, so you're basically that Denny's has a nice night out. That's your idea of eating. That there aren't any beloved local eateries or anything? No.

It's all changed. It was one of those towns where the fast food was at your portal to the larger world. Right. And it was a city, Pittsburgh, which was like an hour away. And yeah, it was, I mean, that's all we ate, which is looking back at it. Just absolutely insane. Right. I would never constantly feed my kid fast food.

Yeah. Yeah. That would just comprise most of your diet, or at least when you're eating out diet. I assume you had meals prepared in the home. Yeah, we did, but it's like, you know, after practice, you'd go get McDonald's, which is the idea of eating McDonald's right now. And I'm sorry if they're a sponsor or anything, but I mean, it's terrifying to me. Really?

Yeah. Because I still love McDonald's. What do you usually get? I mean, depends on how I'm feeling. But my go-to is a, if I'm talking about a lunch or dinner order, my go-to at McDonald's is a quarter pounder with cheese. Okay. And I'll do that with some fries and a fountain drink.

I went to a high school reunion and my best friend when I walked in is just sitting on the stairs looking like death. And I said, what happened? He said, I eat McDonald's a few hours ago and he had to go home. Oh, man. He hit the sweats. And so that's a no-go for me. Wow.

I get on a run of, I mean, with this show, you will eat bad things. Yeah. But then when I get on my own personal run of eating unhealthy, which I fell into this last week. Yeah, I fell into that recently. And I drank. So first of all, I'm feeling like shit. Right.

Just physically. And I'm feeling like shit mentally. Right. And just because of your life in general. Yeah. Of course. Shut the fuck up. Yes, of course.

But the combo and then just eating fast food, like going to a slump like that and eating fast food. The hangover from that can be longer than any alcohol hangover from now. Yeah. It can be days. You feel like shit. You feel so bad. And I get into those ruts too.

That's one of the reasons I put some weight on is eating so shittily. Is it the saturated fats? They take a lot of digest. It knocks you out a little bit. I think, I mean, that is, that's, that's like, it's, it is always more fried when I'm eating fried food or, or like McDonald's or Wendy's or. I don't know how much is the micronutrients. I don't know how much is just the volume of food you're putting in your body.

And I don't know how much is just how processed and like loaded with chemicals this shit is. But, you know, and I'm sure I'm sure it all to some degree makes you feel so bad. But yeah, I just when I'm eating, I like, I love it. I'm so happy. And then I feel so bad. Do you, do you guys ever go through the exercise of, you know, you go out and buy, you know, okay, you buy like an iPad or something for whatever $1,000 and think I could have bought

a 1000 hamburgers with, with this same, I could have had a roof full of hamburgers. I don't say we need to eat it, but just the thought of you could actually have done that. Yeah. Are you pitching, are you pitching the, the room full of hamburgers episode because we're we're in. We'll do it. We'll make this happen. Yeah, sure.

That's like a, that's like a, I feel like that's like a, a, a let's make a deal type show where they're like trying to like give you the equivalent of a consumer electronics and food. You're trying to go to weigh that. It was also, is it Kazam, which we just watched as the type of witch that, for Shaq week. Yes. That dumb fool would make the dumb kid. Yeah.

That's that little kid. The little kid wishes for like, I wish there was food from here to the sky and then there's like food just falls from the sky. It's gross. Is that the premise of the movie or is that just a, it's a part of the movie. Shaq is a genie. It's the main turning point. Actually, you know what?

He gets it. It kind of is a turning point in the movie. Really? Yeah. In this terrible, terrible movie. It's his first wish and it kind of goes awry. But not quite in like a devil's paw way. No.

It's not like, it's not like, like, oh God, this really wasn't what I wanted. It was just, it just is mad. We don't need to, to belabor Kazam. No, we're going to belabor it. I drove all the way here to belabor it. Let me just say that, that Kazam Shaq week. Yes. That was phase two of no boys.

Shaq week was phase two. It's like the marble phases, Nick. Okay. We're slowly releasing things out. We're doing new stuff. So phase one was the first four years of content. Space two was Shaq week. And now we're in phase three.

Now we're in phase three. We'll see what's to come. We haven't really revealed phase three. But phase three. The phase guy just realized he had a good five phases by next week. I was just burning through him. I've been sitting on phase one for years. What am I?

I'm a fool. Oh, the deal was move a dot Ford. We're doing stuff. Stuff is happening. I still don't know what you're talking about. There's new dough boy stuff that's happening. We're in phase three right now. Are you referring to the dose scored?

Yeah. No. I'm referring to the Marvel. How they have phases. Shaq. Shaq week was an undeniable hit. People love Shaq. I love Shaq.

I think it was our podcast apex. Yes. What were you going to say? What was going to be your leading question? Then we'll see what mine is. Mine is better. But go ahead. So we're each going to ask a question and then...

Yeah. What was going to be your transition? I was going to transition to... RJ told us something interesting. Yeah. So was I. Okay. All right.

Wow. About his digestion. Yeah. And while we were eating at Subway and RJ, that is... That I cannot burp. You can't burp. Wow. I cannot burp.

It's... It informs so much of my diet because I cannot burp. I cannot vomit. Right. And because I cannot vomit, I dry-heave. And so if I get food poisoning, it is an absolute nightmare consisting of me doing exorcist-style dry-heaves for hours on end. Jesus.

So, you know, so much of my... And it's tough to work in Midtown Manhattan with this kind of affliction. And it isn't affliction. The fact that you guys are setting up a foundation for me right now is deeply disappointing. Well, maybe that's what the bitch is doing on his phone. Right. So, you know, it just... I wasn't going to go revenge on the nerds.

And booger is the one who burps a lot. Okay. Right. And the anti-booger. You are anti-booger. No, I... No, I like booger. Yeah.

Okay. I'm the anti-booger. You are the... Yes, you are the anti-booger. The booger and I can't touch. So, yeah. I mean, it just informs... It's everything.

It's... You know, if someone mentions a restaurant, the first thing I'm thinking is, will this make me vomit? Right. So, carbonation is just basically out of the question. Only in very small doses, I never drink beer. My wife and I, in that situation, where we'll order drinks and the waiter will bring them out and they'll hand the, like, you know, martini or wine to her and then her beer to

me thinking, you know, because a lot of people just have backwards views on gender. And, you know, and so, yeah, it's... I can't do it. So, that's wild. That happens to me and Natalie all the time. It'll be, like, you know, I'll order, like, a glass of rosé or a, you know, like a, like a pina colada or something and she'll get, like, a stiff drink, just like a bourbon. Right.

Natalie rules. Yeah, yeah. She's so much cooler than you. I mean, she just is. I like my wife. I know. My thing... The thing that brings her down in my book is that she likes you.

It's her only flaw. Is it really her only flaw? Well, let me tell you something, Mitch. She doesn't. So, she'll tell you that herself. But, like, they'll do the same thing. They'll give me, like, her old-fashioned or, you know, her Martini up and then they'll give...

And it's always, like, a thing we have to crack. Yeah, exactly. So, you're a... Hey, so, if you were... If you had the fizzy lifting drink and then Charlie and the Chaka Factor, you'd be doomed. You'd be up... You'd be got chopped up by that fan. Yeah, you'd just keep us sending Skyward.

I'd just go to sleep. I can't watch it. Too disturbing. Yeah, it's a nightmare. That's my horror film. So, what is the sensation when you can't burp? You just have, like, a searing pain? Just, yeah, a pain feeling like I want to go away.

I want to run. I want to go to bed. Wow. Bed is usually the solution. What age were you when you discovered this about yourself? Well, you know, I... Oh, God, what would it be? I think when, you know, as in high school, people start forcing alcohol down your throat.

Yeah. And so, you know, I started to realize that, yeah, and I just started, you know, heaving. I couldn't get it up. I was getting... I couldn't... I'd never had that relief that, like, during hazing situations where it's like, oh, the person gets to, you know, boot and rally. I never had that.

And so, it was always... Yeah, it was always a traumatic experience drinking. But, yeah. I'm a better burper as I've gotten. Really? As I've become a bigger, fatter, older man. I'm a better burper. I don't like when you brag.

But I was always pretty good. I'm definitely not the anti-booger, but I am more of an ogre. I'm saying ogre from the movie. But I can... I can... Who is also in the burp and contest. But I can burp pretty well. I cannot throw up, though, which we talked about.

What were we gonna say? Well, yeah, I think there is a surgery that I can have to open up my esophagus. Open up my esophagus and relieve this. Wow. But I also think there's... I think the... For some reason, the medical community is... I don't know when I acknowledge this group.

But I feel like every once in a while, I'll meet someone and they'll say, yes, I'm just like you. I never thought I'd find someone like you. Wow. And it's like this, you know, and then... But doctors don't seem to really, you know, give a shit when you say it. I don't know. They don't seem concerned.

It seems like a weird thing that they don't care about this at all. Below my radar. I'm doing that to other office. It seems like an annoying thing that is just kind of like, hey, you can deal with it or get this surgery, which is... And that's it, right? I don't know. But that, I mean, that to me sounds...

It sounds nightmarish. It seems rough. It's hard. Now, why can't you vomit? I just can never... I can. It's so hard for me to ever get anything up. My stomach likes what it got.

Hold onto that for dear life. It's like a hoarder. Yeah, it's... There's newspapers down there. Don't go to your flame. Jar's a piss. Jar's a piss. And your stomach.

Wow. That's not... That's your stomach. I understand how you got the piss there. Jar's? The first thing is mine goes to... There's stuff from like the... There's Jumpin' Jack Doritos down there.

I was at high school. It's a really good one. Old little cheat papers from the taken tests. Everything, it's a mess down there. But I can't... I can never get myself to... I never have ever successfully, as they say, pulled the trigger if I'm feeling sick.

I've never got myself to vomit. But you have just puke in voluntarily. But it's also like so far between... I throw up like once every four years. You're an infrequent puke. And if even that, I never, ever, ever vomit. And then even when I feel like I have to vomit, I'm always just like, I'll go to the toilet,

and I'm like, God, I don't want to do this on the air. But I'm like, and I can't get it. I can't get it to come up almost ever. And then if I'm very, very sick, it will happen. And I feel like a million dollars, and I wish I could do it more. I can never do it. Did you ever vomit in elementary school?

What's that? Did you ever vomit in elementary school? I feel like every person I've ever talked to, they can name every single time someone vomited in elementary school. Of course, yeah. They can mark the time that way. I remember when I was...

My dad was driving to elementary school, and I told him, I was like, I'm not feeling well. He's like, you'll be fine. And then no evidence whatsoever. And out of his work car, I threw... I remember I rolled down the window. I threw up like right while we got to school.

And my dad's like, I'm bringing you home. And in my head, I clearly remember singing Woop There It Is as I was going home. That's pretty good. Like as a little dorky boy, I was still like... Like a loud? No, in my head, I'm saying. What is getting at is,

Woop There It Is came out two years later, so he thinks he might have invented it. I invented the song, Woop There It Is. Because I was like in fifth grade. So that's also like... It's a weird origin story. A young boy puking. But I was like in fifth grade.

So this is like one of my first memories. Right. That's pathetic. What a pathetic bad life. And then I was 16. And I told you that I was bullied by Ryan Whitney. We talked about that a little bit. For those who don't know Ryan Whitney,

former Thayer Academy graduate with... Along with Mitch and then went to Boston University, played in the NHL. Might have won a cup or two with the Penguins maybe? He never won a cup. I was watching. That was you. Yeah, that was me.

That was my influence. And yeah, I think you're podcast now. You're a direct competitor. That's right. He does. Spit and checklets. He has a podcast. I told you, I was like, yeah, he was kind of a bully to me.

And you can tell everyone. You said he was like, oh, he's a great guy. Yeah, he was great. I don't know why I didn't process that. But yeah, no, I played hockey with him during the summers. He was a wonderful teammate. And honestly, bullying you never came up in conversation. Had it.

I would have been like, you shouldn't have done that. Hell yeah. Take that, Whitney. Also, now that I've made all these dorky jokes, I feel like you want to bully me as well. I know. Rightfully, rightfully so. It wasn't that kind of, yeah.

I got a question. You're such a smart, well-spoken man. And I'm just saying that in the hockey world, there are definitely a lot of, but there's also goons. You got goons? Yeah. Right. No, it's, well, let me first say, you know,

perhaps Ryan being an exception, it's a very nice group of hockey players. You really have to. Like it's a really tough sport. I told you Brooks Orpik was a great guy. Yeah, there's very lovely people. To do such a tough sport, such a team sport, you kind of have to like, there's years of shaving down

your ego in the locker room. It's one of the only sports too that has like a 45 minutes of just getting dressed in the locker room. So that's so much of the camaraderie on the sport is this 45 minutes of getting dressed together and shitting on each other. Yeah. So it's typically a wonderful group of people,

but yes, I would say probably not the smartest bunch. And, you know, a very fun sport to play, but, you know, ultimately the, you know, a comedy is more, I think more, more fun ultimately. Yeah. Oh God. I would, I would, I don't know though. Yeah, I don't know.

His comedy fun, I don't know anymore. I think I like hockey more and I don't like hockey. Well, I'd say the two things I haven't, well, there's another thing too, was people say like, oh, why'd you quit? I would have been so glamorous to be in the, you know, to play professional hockey and all that stuff. Right.

And I had the same feeling playing, you know, I did like the pre-season camps and stuff and, you know, the same feeling. You were, sorry, and I just want to interject it to give our listeners some context. You were drafted in the NHL draft. Is that correct? Yes.

I was drafted after my senior year in high school. Wow. Then I played in college and then signed an amateur trial with the Ottawa Senators. And the, I had the same feeling doing that as I did at Letterman, which was like the Ed Sullivan Theater is just full of these like exposed pipe.

It's like not nearly as nice backstage as you think it's going to be. You know, green room is not that big, et cetera. And then you walk out on stage and it's absolutely gorgeous. And hockey, you know, professional hockey is the same way. It's like long bus trips, you know, overnight and stuff. And then when you walk on the rink, it's gorgeous.

It's fun. But behind that, it's, you know, it's a lot of shittiness back there. Hockey players, my dad was, my dad was a loved hockey and he played it, but then he didn't, he never, it was like the one sport he didn't give me into because he didn't want to wake up at like five and do that whole ground.

He was like not into that. So I didn't really play hockey. Yeah. I played street hockey, but every hockey player, a lot of tough, tough as nails guys. Why? I think it gotta be. There's a lot of tough, there's a lot of tough people

who play that sport. Yeah. I was going to say a thing that when we talk about hockey, which we barely, rarely do, a thing I bring up is hockey rink pizza. Does that make sense to you? Absolutely. Okay, good.

Yeah. They throw, I don't even know how they cook it. Yeah. It's just, hockey rink pizza is always, is always a good. They make you turn around. Don't look back at it. I always think of it like when I have like a,

if I have like a good, a lower quality pizza, I'm always like, this is like a good hockey rink pizza or something like that. Is there any other like activity or sport where the restaurant is so close to like the playing field where you can be like, you're skating and you're sweating and then you go get pizza.

You can be back on the ice in seconds. I don't know if there's another, usually restaurants are so far away from the activity. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no. No, no. No, no. Yeah, sure.

Yeah. Yeah. I know it's, it seems like such a part. And then also when I was like a kid or if I went to a game or anything like that. You know, so what is it? It's like a personal pizza. It's like a slice.

What do you get? I mean, it can be a lot of different things. This is this. And I think sometimes, but you know what? You don't see as much anymore is like, there was like specific, I feel like toaster ovens with specific like piggies, pizza and things like that. That were like frozen.

I have like a DeGiorno's quality. Yes. You know, like a real classic no frills pizza. Yeah. You always undercooked a little bit. But maybe like salty, like over cheese, salty. Okay. Yeah.

Yeah. That would hit the spot if I was playing youth hockey. I know that this is a weird specific thing. What? Start now. Yeah. Not to play youth hockey. Oh man.

RJ. What did I open up? This is the right episode. I just got blinded. And that door, I just swung open. So, so as also within your, like during your playing days. Yes. My understanding is that there was a stretch

where you had no dessert for seven years. Yes. I think it was like from senior year to high school and I didn't, or junior or senior year decided I'm not going to, because I'm, I, I find the only way to quit something is called turkey. Right. The gray area kills me. I'm doing this intermittent fasting diet right now,

which, which I love because it's literally like stop watch and then, you know, And then you put your fork down basically. Yeah. And then, but I only diet. You're eating all the way up to the buzzer. I'm not trying to cram as much pasta. Well, it's kind of,

I just slice off my mouth right now. RJ and I are sports guys. Okay. You don't get it. You don't get playing to the buzzer. I'm a sport. No, you're not. I'm a big time sport.

And like all sports people, I say I'm a sport. Yeah. I mean, it's a, no, I just find that it's, it's the gray area thing is just doesn't work for me. Did you guys ever, do you find the same thing?

Do you? It's definitely easier to completely abstain from something. Right. Than for me to have it in moderation. Yeah. I agree with, I agree that psychologically, but so, but why?

The hard rules I usually do better with, when I'm, when I'm being tough on myself, but what about, can I just, I just want to quickly say that a no dessert for seven years seems like a really angry dad punishment. It does.

No dessert for seven years. And it's like, dad, I'm going to have dessert. I killed a frog. Jesus. Yeah. Yeah.

No, I mean, it was, it started out as health and then it started out as, then it became kind of like, Oh, can I, can I do this? Can I just like, there's something kind of reaffirming of like,

I mean, I thought I find the same with dieting where it's like, Oh, I'm in control. Like, you know, it's, it's some kind of sense of control. Like if I can do this,

I can, I have control over my brain. Sure. Yeah. It's not running rampant. Yeah. Yeah. It's crazy how when I was just saying that,

when you, when you go, when I was saying, you know, and then I've fallen off and it's crazy how your mind slips like that. We're like, I'm fucking out of control and I'm doing shit left and right.

That's no good. It informs like your whole life. It surely does. You're 100% right. But that, that's like the, I guess the, for me,

for me, when I've struggled with the abstention thing is like, if I fall out the wagon a little bit, then I'm all the way off. Like if I'm like, I'm supposed to not do this. And then I just do it a little bit. I have like,

I'm like, I'm not having any beer this year. And then I have like one beer. Then I'm having eight beers that night. And then I'm having Yeah. Nothing happened over the next two weeks. Yeah.

Like the world didn't end. So, you know, yeah, it doesn't work. Hey, I'm freaking out of control right now. Is that how you, is that, is that me shit face?

Is that what you're doing? No, no, that's what I'm saying when you've like lost his role of everything. Oh yeah. You got a handcuff me to the mailbox. I'm freaking crazy right now. Yeah.

But it's also like an indictment of, now I'm feeling like, Oh, what's wrong with me that I cannot control myself? Oh, you're like, Oh God, I could spit off the earth just like that.

I have one piece of chocolate. I'm just, Yeah. And it is crazy that just the, the, I was like, I had not drank soda in so long. Yeah.

And I, Nick, I, but you know what I was doing, I was doing some Arnold Palmer's or Nick, more like Nick Weigher's. And you know what I gotta say about these? Cause I got one tonight.

That an Arnold Palmer or the Nick Weigher. Yeah. Third lemonade, two thirds iced tea. Um, it's not. No, it's not.

It's not yours. Nick Weigher. I invented it. It makes shitty, it makes shitty lemonade good. Like, if you have a low quality lemonade, it makes it really raises the level of it

because it's just sweetening up that iced tea. Do you think this was low quality lemonade tonight? No, we're not talking about the chain yet. I don't know yet, but we will get it. We'll get it. We'll get into that. So the Nick Weigher hasn't caught on.

The, there was an In-N-Out burger found in New York City. Ah, yes. Oh yeah, I heard about this. We haven't talked too much about it. What's our buddy's name? What is wrong with you? What is that?

What is our buddy's name? Who sent, there's the guy who sent it to us. And, there was a vice write up. It was, it was, but it was a vice write up,

but the guy who found it actually sent. Oh Lincoln. Munchies, Munchies skew. It was a real double doubles. This guy Lincoln sent it to us. He found it. And he was,

and he was, and people were like, this is like a setup. It looked like, I assumed it was a stunt. But it would be a good one. He legit found it. I don't know,

I don't know what the, I think the cases saw, but I don't know what the deal was. They cracked the case. And apparently it was a woman who had bought, she could have been a student. I don't remember the exact, exactly who she was,

but she had bought a bunch of double doubles in San Francisco and it brought them across. And then dropped one. Like, accidentally. Yeah. So, but she,

insane. Cause the burgers would just be cold. But also, in an article, and I think it was like in the post or something, they refer to one of the burgers. This is true. As Armin style.

Wow. They say, they call it Armin style. I think it's because of Lincoln, but they refer to it as Armin style. Now we haven't used this term for a while. So for a listener who's aren't familiar with it,

Armin Styler, but he Armin Weitzman, guest, former guest of the podcast. Is he banned now? Was he just refusing to come on? No, he just doesn't want to come on.

Can we say he's banned? Yeah, he's banned. Okay. So he has control over it. I'm banning him. All right. RJ has banned Armin Weitzman. Sorry.

But our former guest. Don't know you don't like him. By the way, A lot of people will be happy, and a lot of people will be sad. This is, by the way, Doughboyz phase three,

guests can ban other guests. Wow. This is, this is canon now. As far as I ban myself. So, so Armin, Armin Weitzman,

been on the show before, huge in and out fan, he gets an Armin style, which is both raw onions and grilled onions on the same burger. That's right. So double your onions, onions two ways.

It's in print journalism. It does work well. Yeah. Don't you dare call it fake news, Nick. It's real. Armin style is real. And you're just jealous that the Nick Weiger hasn't caught on that.

Wait, so there's no other possible reason that this is how it's, why it's called what it's called. I think it's just because that Lincoln, that our friend Lincoln there, listens to the podcast. Oh, wow.

Yeah. I think that he, I think he was quoted. It's a little Easter egg in there. Oh, I see. That's fun. That's great. So, okay.

So no dessert, beyond your no dessert for seven years thing, like, like was, was part of the motivation for that. Return to that real quick. Do you have a sweet tooth? You're someone who creates sweet treats.

I ate a lot of sweets. You know, it's, I think actually, because what I, you know, we used to do when I was a kid, was we'd go to Sheets.

Do you guys were aware of Sheets? Yeah, I'm aware of Sheets, but it's like the wall, wall of Western Pennsylvania. Okay. Go to Sheets. We would get,

you know, me, my brother and sister would get two desserts a piece. So we, there was tons of sweets around. I wouldn't bring lunch to school for, now we're getting into like, you know,

the weird childhood stuff, but I wouldn't bring lunch to school and I would, usually end up just having like someone's dessert or something. So I ate lots of desserts growing up. Yeah. Okay. Now I almost feel like now I've kind of, I've lived that part of,

of my life. That was college for me. And now, now I'm, I've gone straight. Do you, do you not have desserts ever? No,

I do now. And I generally, I generally enjoy them. Yeah. Okay. Wow. I can't believe that. I,

I'm not a huge dessert guy either. I don't, I don't get dessert all the time, but I, if, if that craving was hitting me, I, I would want it if seven years or so,

that's a, that's, that's so long. But you almost like, it's almost like blacked out from your vision at that point. Sure. And I mean, it's not even a consideration.

It's just like, would you never, like you would never have, you didn't have ice cream for seven years basically. Ice cream, chocolate, cake, pie,

none of that stuff. Yeah. I mean, look, there's, there's things that are probably worse that are not considered desserts. Yeah. Sure.

You know, but still that's incredible self control. Oh, thank you. There's so many else, two of them. Good night everyone. Nick and I, we're talking before you got here,

and we're pretty sure you're a witch. You can't burp. You didn't eat dessert for seven years. So we have some athletic skills. This is our third witch we've outed on this podcast. We will have to give you a, we will have to give you a dunk test at some point.

Please. And tell me, let me tell you, a shack passed with front flying colors. Oh boy. It was shack week. Um, so,

so, okay, we're talking about hockey a little bit more. The art is formerly known as spoon is bad. Fuck you. You know, I don't like it now. It's also good.

So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so,

so like, well, you are, you're spending a lot of time there. You're, you're getting prepped. Uh, these games are exhausting.

What are you, what are your pre game and post game meals when you're playing a lot of hockey? When, before a hockey game, it is always grilled chicken and pasta. Okay. And it's for like college.

It was years of that. Right. So after, after hockey was, I don't want to see another grilled chicken and pasta, you know, for a long time. And then after usually,

uh, they'd throw some pizzas on the bus. Right. So that's pretty standard. And the wonderful thing about hockey is like, you can eat pretty much. I mean, with the exceptions,

there were some players who could put on weight pretty easily, but I mean, I, I remember I would eat, you know, you have your breakfast lunch, I would eat two dinners. I mean,

like two plates of dinner and it was not a thing. You know, you're burning so many calories. Yeah. That's so crazy. Yeah. That's like, like that to me is the,

when I was, and never, never anyone who had any athletic success, but when I was running a, a, a ton, when I was doing marathons in my early 20s, well,

marathon singular, a bunch of half-marathons. I was running marathon. Yeah. When I was running marathon in my 20s, but I was like running a shitload of miles. And it was the same sort of thing. It was just like,

I was like the leanest I'd ever been. The lean, I've never, I've never been leaner. And then I could eat so much. I could, I could, you know,

take it like, eat a fucking McDonald's supersize meal and then a fucking six back of beer and I'd be fine. I remember going to hockey, down in like Bridgewater, Massachusetts and grabbing a couple.

I would eat two of those dinners and donut egg sandwiches, which are like, they're like fucking, I shouldn't have said that. They're like five pound weights. I mean, they're,

they're bricks. Oh, you, by the way, you can say fucking as much. You can. Oh, yeah. Sorry. Yeah, I don't know.

You can say, you can say shit like ass. Yeah. Come sandwich. Oh Jesus. Come on. Balls. What does Jimmy Stewart

think of come? No, I, I deserve that. Yeah. So, I, I love,

I don't have it. I tell you, the paint doesn't have your come. I don't know what happened. Oh, I swear to you, I didn't take the calm. That's hard.

That if we make it, it's a wonderful life. It will be about his character. What's his character? I don't know. Jimmy Stewart. Jimmy Stewart. It's a bio.

But in the end, don't they, everyone, everyone from the town comes in. Let's come. Let's come. Thank you. Merry Christmas.

Oh God. Mother-in-law might listen to this. She'll love it. She'll love it. And if she doesn't, it's on her. We, we have to do a show in Boston.

God. And I am fucking terrified of. Oh, really? Why, why is that coming home? Because we're going to do in front of family and stuff.

I'll be like, Nick, they're, they're definitely going. They're there. Yeah. My mom has bought 16 tickets. Wow.

She's just failing in front of your family. Yes. Your friends and family. Or just being like, or just being embarrassed and self-conscious. Yeah. You, so here's what,

here's what I'll say. We did a show in San Diego. Uh-huh. That my parents and brother attended. Yeah. And my sister-in-law. Yeah. And I think you almost immediately made a joke

about me sucking off a horse. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. I mean like,

he didn't say the horse was a whore. That's true. Yeah. It was about you. By the way, Nick, uh, your family stood up and gave me a round of applause. He would do that.

Ha ha ha ha. That's our Nick. I've never bonded more with people in my entire life where I was like, no man, the Wenger family, they're going to be weird like Nick is. And then I met them like, they're all normal.

No, they're normal people. They're normal, they're normal gregarious people. They're outgoing. They're friendly. They want to be everyone's friend. They're like so happy. They're across the street neighbors.

They have potlucks. They were happy that I was roasting you. It was great. Yeah. They thought it was great. Yeah. My brother, my brother liked you more than he likes me.

And vice versa. We're going to hang out. We're going to start our new dough boys, me and him. They're going to fucking cool as hell. Yeah. I tell you what, he's too cool for you.

God damn it. What does he do? Uh, he's, he works in, uh, computers. I guess I would describe it as computers.

Hell. That's great that you really know what your brother does. I know what he does. Hmm. No, he works. Is he a fucking hacker? He's a hacker.

No, I don't know how much he wants disclosed about his employment. He doesn't know anything about shade. He works for like a big company. Yeah. Yeah. Are you going to edit this out? No,

we're not going to edit this out. All right. Good. Um, it's not like a defense contractor. Maybe it is. I don't know. All these companies are due to fence contract.

Yeah. I don't fucking know. He's cool as hell. He's cool as hell. That's all I've learned. He's a cool dude. But, um,

yeah, that's my, my family is very, they're very outgoing and, and friendly. And I just became like the, the wallflower of the bunch. Uh,

you can make, you can say, make a joke about me sucking off a horse when we get to Boston. Okay. I'll, I'll open the show with that. That's fine. And we'll see how everyone,

RJ's been to Quincy. He went to the, the Quincy hockey rink. Of course. Yeah. What's it called? There's a name for it. I can't remember.

Well, simple. When all the kids were playing hockey, I was wondering how the fuck I'm going to get to the other side. And I have no idea, but you just jumped across. I just think it's cool that you were in Quincy at the same point. I was Tom.

Yeah. Yeah. I was there. Some boy. I know you were there and you're not going to, and we're going back and you're not spending much time there. I was in Quincy.

I know. We're going back to Boston for two days and you're leaving the first chance you get. Wait, if you were to take him to Boston, where would you take him? I swear to God, I was like, Hey, on Monday night,

I'll take you to the Red Sox and Yankees game. And the other night he just texted me. He was like, I'm going to be out of there on Monday. And I was like, what do you mean you're going to be out of there on Monday? We're leaving now. We're leaving right away.

Well, we got to go do two more shows in London like that next week. I know. And then I've got to go straight to work after those. Oh, yeah, shut up. We'll take a break way back with more dope boys.

Welcome back to dope boys. We're here with R.J. Freed. The topic this week. Subway. Nick, I found out what the Quincy hockey rink is called. What's it called?

And if I had told you the name of it, you would have demanded we went there on my Quincy tour. Okay. It's called the Quincy, Eutharina. Jesus. All right. So we have reviewed Subway since

you're moving on so quickly. Let's revel in it, my boy. This is caring. It's caring. It's caring. This is character. I don't know.

A man who likes to have fun. Even Jimmy Stewart's like, I don't know about that guy. Oh, thank you. Episode 17 with our, with our friend Fran Glasby back in 2015. Wow. It's been, it's been a while.

It's been a long time. The chain was founded on my birthday, August 28th, earlier than that, 1965. Wow, exact. I wasn't born in 1965.

You were frozen for the first time. Yeah. The baby they threw in a freezer. So 42,000 restaurants in 112 countries and currently undergoing a pretty painful retraction. Been closing hundreds of stores in the past few years because they just, they overexpanded and their,

their sales are way down. RJ, you chose Subway. Yes. And you said you had some, I don't want, I don't want teed up too much, but you said you did have some thoughts on this chain.

Well, I, I was interested. Well, first of all, because of my stomach issues, like I said, you know, I saw the list of chains. I thought this is the one that's least likely to,

to make me sick tonight. Oh, well, interesting. I feel it's, it's whenever I'm on road trips, especially it's, it's the one I will stop off at. I feel confident that I'm not going to have to like,

get a hotel and, and vomit all night. Safe and, safe and predictable. Which for you again, is a nightmare for yours. And I also feel like because of, I almost feel about them the way I feel after the,

an airline has a plane crash where it's like, oh, now it's the safest airline to fly because, that's like a tight ship. Right. I feel that way about this with Jared, where it's like, we guys,

we cannot screw up again. Yeah. Cause we can't do, we can't do that. The, the fact that they survived that. And also just from, from our perspective of subway was,

in my mind, was winning like this. There's, in the fast food wars, they were a place that was on every corner, very accessible. The largest fast food chain in the world. And it was,

and I, the hit that they took with Jared is insane. It's like, like you feel, you can feel the difference. Don't you, don't you think Nick? Yeah.

There's such a juggernaut though. They kind of, they kind of just kept chugging where I feel like that could happen. And it's like, it's kind of like the, but Quiznos is not going back from that. If the,

one of the rats, no, no, yeah, that's known as the Jared threshold, right? Where your, your corporation could sustain a Jared like. Yeah.

That, that, that is not, I mean, that might be a thing. And if it isn't, it should be a thing. Cause that,

cause I think a lot of, there, there are few places that would come back from that, but not many. Were you suggesting one of the cartoon rodent mascots from the old Quiznos campaign? I was thinking on my feet. I was sort of Jared-esque.

I was saying, if they did, if that happened, but if they did though, you know, like the Verizon, can you hear me now guy? They,

they took Jared. Oh man. This isn't, this isn't the same. We paid him so much money. I'm saying, if Quiznos would be done, there's,

when that survived, I'm saying like, I even think like a five guys could go down. I'm saying like, there's like a lot of places that are big right now. One of the five guys had a Jared like skin. There's four more guys. There's four more guys,

but I don't know. They should have had five Jared. That's their pets. What are these guys that's going to have sex with some Thai kids? We just, that's just numbers. There's one in every group.

The Jared, this Jared downfall, it's, it's insane. It is insane. It's an insane thing. McDonald's would survive it. Wendy's Burger King.

I mean, maybe not even Burger King anymore. Maybe that would be the nail in the coffin of Burger King or something. I think they, they're big enough and they're enough of a global brand that I think those would all keep going. But it is akin to the Weinstein company

continuing to release films. I mean, it's like, it's like that. They were so identified with Jared. Jared was their whole brand. And why? He sucked so much. He was a shitty. It's kind of amazing.

They put so much, so many eggs in the basket of this non-celebrity. Well, he was a celebrity, but he's a celebrity that they elevated it. Probably honestly, because they could control him entirely, that was like their thought process. It's also a lesson.

Like one of the best pieces of advice I've ever heard is like, don't be fooled by like, just because like something is like big and glossy that there's not a bunch of fucking idiots running it. Oh, sure. And the fact that no one was like, maybe we should check out this guy or just keep an eye on him

considering like all our wealth is tied to him. Right. It's kind of, it is like an Enron or a Bear Stearns and like Jesus, how this behemoth go down, it makes you, it reminds you not to trust,

you know, massive corporations. Yeah. I agree. And look, I was, my history with Subway is that weird thing where I told you were, I never really liked Subway. I was a D'Angelo's man

because I lived in Massachusetts. That was my sub chain. Sure. And then local, you know how it is in like the Northeast, just a local sub chains or whatever. I was never, I never got Subway.

There was never even a Subway around. D'Angelo's is great. And there, there is a Subway in Quincy now, but I like, when I was growing up, there wasn't even a Subway. And then eventually when I moved,

when I was in college, there was like a place that was like a Subway where you could just get a sub every night for dinner if you wanted to. And then also when I got out here, there was a Subway around the block for me. And then I realized when you customize your sandwiches, you can make something that's like semi healthy,

not healthy, cause people can give me shit for this before on the podcast, but something that's like, Oh, a nice turkey sub is so much better than going and getting whatever. You mean in a relative sense, because there's no 23 years old and eating takeout like that every night.

Yes. You can't eat healthy really at any fast food restaurant easily, but it's Subway. You can come closer to approximating something. And if you're talking about making some small savings, yeah, getting a turkey sandwich on wheat

versus getting a double western bacon cheeseburger from Carl's Junior Heart, it's probably the better. Is there anyone else in that genre of, like I know like, there's like Chick-fil-A will pride themselves on some kind of healthy, like is there anyone else in that genre of inexpensive,

but kind of healthy? I mean, they've got a lane there. Yeah. I'm trying to think it's, it's tough because they, I think it, I think your costs are higher when you're trying to do healthful food, you know.

Right. Right. Which is like, which it is. I mean, like the places that we've seen and we've talked about of like, sweet green or,

or, or tender greens, those are all pretty, it's probably double the price of Subway. Yeah. And they're not available in much of the country. Yeah. And Subway is just so much more convenient.

You're in and out of there and every like, sweet green or, or tender greens, I can think of like, the parking situation is always bad. It's always in like a popular part of town or whatever. Subway did that thing

where they just bought up so much real estate and they're so easy to get to. There's one block, two blocks away from my house with parking and everything like that. So. Right. So as far as that,

like in a place that's also open later, where it's 11pm or midnight, a place where you can also get something that's not the worst thing on earth. Let me tell you that. This outside of a burger or whatever. That, that Subway after late last call kind of is the worst place on earth though.

Oh, it's awful. Like to be like, I would hate to work there at that time. They're open that late. Some of them, they're, they're Subways that are open 24 hours and that's a miserable scene. Jesus Christ.

A bunch of drunk people yelling for sandwiches. It's also like, buried employees. The last thing you want when you're drunk is like 30 options. Right, right. Ingredients. It's like, Oh God.

I don't know, I don't know. Yeah. The other thing I did want to bring up and I, I mean, part of the reason I was reluctant to choose Subway is I feel like it's, it's become kind of jokie because of the, the Jared.

Sure. But there is, I looked it up and, and Jared. Okay. So he went, he pled guilty to charges in 2015. He was sentenced to,

if he does good behavior, 13 years. So there is a year in our lifetime where Subway is going to have to deal with Jared getting out of jail. That's right. Which is around what, I guess, 2028. Yeah.

So that's the guy thing and, and a competitor will hire him. Yeah. Subway will pay him to go to Jimmy John's. Again, from my cell phone for some reason. I don't know what we're doing. Yeah.

I mean, like it's, do you know what, you want to know what the final phase is? What? Our star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. And you know what? It's a fucking disgrace that there's no podcasters on the Hollywood Walk of

Fame right now as is. It's, it's like Mark Marin. He's not on there. It might be on there. Yeah. Can we get the fact check in the apartment? Yeah,

I don't know. Joe Rogan might be on there. I don't know. Fuck. Yeah. I, Conan has a podcast now. Conan's on there.

But for podcasting? Yeah. Yeah. We'll be the first star for podcasting on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Mark, my words, Marin, all you have to do is raise enough money to get it.

Oh yeah. Oh yeah. It's not, there's not some like, secret, glamorous, you know, committee.

It's just like you raise enough money. That's bullshit, really? But they do have to, they do like the mayor of that, that strip or whatever has to approve. They have land? Yes.

The mayor of the strip? There's like some like Hollywood like committee that the guy, I was at one of these ceremonies. I, the guy is like, there's a guy who's in charge of it. And they, He has to approve it.

Yeah. So that's how people don't just buy their ways on their way onto it. Cause they're like, they have a bunch of money. Where are you at? The Minions Hollywood walk of fame, star ceremony. They're on the walk of fame?

Probably. This is, I was upset that they had that grew didn't get a star. I agree. The Minions deserved one, but so did grew. What, which ceremony were you at?

My, my old boss, there's over. Okay. Wonderful. Yeah. But it's a, yeah,

maybe we'll get on there. Probably not. I was going to say this. I was joking. We're not going to get on there. No. Do you thought I was serious? I don't know.

You never know. No, it's not going to happen. Okay. It's going to be in the. It's here. It's not. It's going to be in the fucking trash,

the trash pile, the Hollywood trash pile. So not too far from that Hollywood trash pile and from the Hollywood walk of fame, we were at the Hillhurst subway location. So far away from the whole fucking thing. It's not that far. It's very far. It's not that far.

Yeah. It's close. Okay. It's close. You can get there. Okay. They ended out 20 minutes of arguing over whether it was close. Imagine if you got your star in front of like a subway.

Wouldn't that be like a, that is someone has one in front of a subway. Chris Farley's star is in front of iOS, but now iOS is gone and I don't know why it's going to go in there. Sure. It'll turn into condos or something. Yeah. Yeah.

Whatever. There's a Popeyes chicken right by there. Yeah. There's a good Popeyes. Yeah. What's that guys? It's fine. It's not going to come back and complain.

So we went to the location on Hillhurst, not too far from the Hollywood walk of fame. That's right. As we've established. And we dined in. RJ and I hung out for a little bit and it showed up. Yeah. And we got a few different sandwiches.

Yeah. Such a piece of shit. So here's what, why don't we do it this way? We'll each say what we ordered and then we'll give our thoughts on these sandwiches. Sure. Since we all tasted everything.

I got. So the right now they're running a promotion with all their new, their Cheabata sandwiches with fresh mozzarella. That's their big thing. They've got Cheabata bread, which to me I feel like Cheabata, that was like, that's like from 10 years ago, right? They're a little behind.

It's weird that they're, they're marketing this as some new thing. Cause I feel like this was everywhere and chains a while back. Should have put this shit out when Jared was around. Subway is as old as hell. Well, that's, they were co-starred for so long. He must have been so powerful right now. I don't want to get back to Cheabata.

So, so we, we actually asked the guy, which cause they have like four different sandwiches and we're like, what, like, is that one good? And he was like, I don't know. Like the guy was very tepid on like three of the four sandwiches, but the chicken best. I really respect it. I thought that was great.

I'm glad I'm very, the service was great. They were very honest and very, very quick. It wasn't a very easy one to make. It didn't seem like an easy one to make, but he suggested it and he said it was the best one. So he stretched before he made it. So, we stretched before we ate it as well. What I liked about this and the other sandwich,

I got the savory rotisserie style chicken Caesar wrap, which came in a spinach wrap, is that both of them involved using that toasting oven to heat up some chicken. And I don't think the chicken on the chicken pesto was, it didn't seem as fresh as that on the rotisserie, in the rotisserie style chicken Caesar wrap. I don't know how fresh any of this stuff is,

but it felt like just the fact that it was heated and I've made it, woke it up a little bit. Sometimes chicken is not great. It's not great. Yeah. The rotisserie style feels like it's at least like whole bird. It's not like just like this processed, you know, pressed meat. But when we get to ranking these sandwiches,

I'll give you a little surprise for you right here. One of the chicken sandwiches is one of the best ones. Interesting. Yeah. Yeah. The chicken, I mean, the ciabatta is just very ciabatta-y. There's just a lot of bread there. It's very dense.

I thought the pesto sauce was nice. The fresh mozzarella basically had no flavor, but the fresh mozzarella often. Well, it's such a weird thing because then they also melt the fresh mozzarella on there. So which kind of takes away from the whole thing of it. Like it's like, oh, this, these little pads are now melted onto the chicken.

It's got so much moisture in it that it doesn't really work. Yeah. And, and yeah, so it was just kind of like a, like flavorless mush and then the, but this chicken Caesar wrap for me, I really like that a lot. I thought the, I thought just the veggies inside of it. I thought the Caesar dressing was nice so that the chicken was decent quality.

I threw some pepper jack cheese in there, some jalapenos, some peach seeker, some spinach and some other veggies. And I thought that was delightful. And I thought that was, that was, that was light. And for the price was a, was quite a nice option. RJ, what did you get for your sandwiches? I kept it very simple. Yes.

A six inch turkey provolone tomato, avocado, green peppers, cucumbers, no dressing for me. The avocado kind of satisfies my need for, for, for that texture. Yeah. And I just kept it. I wanted to try kind of my old faithful healthy option.

I thought it was, it was great. I mean, I almost feel like, but then, you know, I tried some of yours. I almost feel like I've been eating, you know, I try to eat so bland because of, of my issues with that happened inside my torso. And so I think when, when I, anything that's super like tasty,

like your guys's was just like, you know, overwhelming. Right. But for, for, for my level of, of taste, it was, uh, yeah, I really enjoyed it. I thought yours tasted, uh, as, uh, love it's used to say in the commercials, fresh. It was very, uh, fresh.

Yes. Yes. Jesus. I hated going out on the limb and saying that word. But, uh, that was, wait, love it's was in the subway commercials. Yes. When was this? They should never have gotten rid of love it's.

Yeah. I mean, you, I think, I think you came like in the, in the, in the presence of Jared. I think it was there during, but remember it was like subway, fresh. Remember that? I bet there was a guy who,

when Jared was marching around the office, he was a love it's guy and he said, we should never have gotten rid of love it's. And then Jared thing went down. Everyone was like, don't fucking say it. We should never. We should have kept love it's. Oh, you're the CEO now.

I guess. Okay. But, but, but, uh, the, the freshness factor on your sandwich and Nick, your sandwich was, uh, was high. They were both very fresh. Yeah. They tasted good.

It tasted what you're reading was, and I know that we were talking about any fast food lettuce, which to me, I think, uh, ranking the fast food lettuce. I think it's interesting because I wonder what you think is some of the, some of the best fast food lettuce company.

A lot of these places, the idea of fast food lettuce is funny to me. This is like raiding the grass of the Olympics. There's nothing to do with what they're doing. I think like, yeah, because a lot of these places have a very, have a pretty similar shredded iceberg. I don't think it,

the subway is lettuce is anything special. I was going to say Wendy's has a nice, uh, lettuce. They do decent lettuce. Yeah. You got like a green leaf lettuce on, on a Wendy's sandwich sometimes chicken. You got that. You got the, uh, it's like the iceberg, a nice piece of iceberg on that sandwich.

So, I mean, one thing I've read is that the best way to avoid a stomach virus is to eat something that's very cold or very hot. Like soups are, or, you know, you can't really get a virus from soups because they're heated so high. And so the ingredients I chose for the subway sandwich, I think tend to be on the chilled side,

which makes, makes me feel good. Yeah. I thought, I thought, I thought both of those sandwiches were, were tasted nice and fresh. And I do think it was, you know, whether there was some good ingredients going in there, if they, if they had some fresh lettuce out or whatever it was, it was things, every, every sandwich was okay.

It was they, none of them were, were completely, none was like bad. Yes. I like the wheat bread on RJ's sandwich. And I thought that the, the bit of avocado I got was a, a honey oat. Honey oat brother. Yes. I'm sorry. Yeah. I like that, that, that whole grain bread.

And it seemed like a pretty healthy, at least tasted like a healthier option. I've heard for something so, so dense and bready. And I thought like the spinach wrap, like the actual wrap was, was decent. I mean, it didn't have a lot of flavor, but it was like fine. Did you guys, I mean, did you guys like that wrap? We all right with it?

You keep saying wrap and wrap over and over again. And people are going to want me to do some sort of lettuce or spinach wrap. You don't have to do that. You are projecting. Please don't do that. It's phase, it we're in phase three now and I'm not doing

the lettuce wrap anymore. Please don't do the lettuce wrap. Fuck you. Let us wrap made this show. No. This play, this show is about Posteroni, the desperado parody now. I, well, I got,

I got something that had the potential to be really bad. Yes. I got the, the Southwest Chipotle steak wrap. Yes. Whatever the fuck this thing was. It was on a tomato wrap. It was a, I got pepper jack cheese. It comes with steak, shredded steak.

And then there's a Chipotle sauce, kind of like a Chipotle mayo. And they're supposed to be guacamole, but there was no guacamole. So they put avocado in there. Yeah. And like I said, on that tomato wrap, it was good.

It was, it wasn't bad, right? Nick, you said that you want to have a fun time with it. I took a, I took a couple of bites of that. And I was like, I don't dislike this. It's, it's, you know, it was kind of, it kind of like tasted like a bad filly cheese steak wrapped in a tortilla. But it was like, I think,

Let's count. It was like seven. Well, go ahead. I was just going to say, I would rather have a burrito. Like if I'm going to eat something that dense and, and filled with cheese and meat, I'd rather just have like a good burrito.

But as far as like a subway option, I was like, this is okay. If I didn't want a sandwich. 750 calories. My thing is his like, sure, it's probably not as high as like an actual steak and cheese you get from a, a steak and cheese place

or even their steak and cheese in a big sub. Sure. Cause it's in that wrap, but 750 calories. It's that other thing too. I just looked at it and I was like, if you ate this whole thing, would you even be that satisfied?

It's, it was tiny. It's not that big. It's not that big. And then also like, why are you going to, if you're going to go out and get a steak and cheese, just do it big. Why, like,

why get this thing is kind of my feeling more about it. When I, when I saw it, I thought, and the end, I remember like, whenever I would get done with like a week long hockey camp and it's like, I couldn't wait to eat something disgusting. That was,

that felt like that would have hit the spot. Cause it just, you know, it just had that, that feeling like it was good. It was salty. It was going to satisfy. I thought it was,

it was better than I expected. I was, I was pleasantly surprised, but I think it, it's a circumstantial heat. You know, I was, I was surprised to hear it cause I loved pasta nights.

I loved to, I loved to carve up before and then not, I would sit on the bench, watch, watch, watch, be filled when I played football and would fill up on spaghetti

and then the next day just sit on the bench as the team plays. But, but post sports, like working out like man, they really, that's a good meal. It's a, it's a great memory,

a great memory of like you after football games, if there were hot dogs left over or something like that, it was great. I also got a big, a 12 inch Italian sub, a foot long on white, and that, and I got the Italian BMT,

which is ham, pepperoni, and salami. Right? Right. Can I just say the acronym BMT? Yeah. Sounds like ball movement.

I've never known what it stands for. It does sound weird. Yeah. No, it's not right. Yeah. BLT. I don't know. You're right.

BLT, it's like, oh, is it a play on BLT and it's not to play on BLT? Yeah. Really? No. It's also,

there's only three letters. There's a screw with one of the letters. Yeah. It was less calories than the spicy Italian, which was just, but weirdly has an extra meat. Maybe that ham is what brings it down. Do you guys know what the acronym BMT stands for?

What? You're going to be mad. Big meaty. Biggest meatiest tastiest. Oh, jeez. That sucks. Fucking trash. That should be in jail with Jared.

That sucks. Fucking sucks. Jared's like, I thought I was bad. Not looking too bad anymore, huh? No, you look awful. Fuck you, Jared. Oh yeah.

Can I just go up and say, Jared fucking sucks. Fuck that piece of shit, Jared. For the record? Yeah. For the record. I mean, I don't think you have,

I think people know your stance on, will understand anyone's stance on Jared. Here's actually another thing that the, the sub organization has, has survived. I remember going to subway in Indiana, Pennsylvania, and there was,

there was always this images on the wall that would make, that would make riding the subway seem almost like flying a plane in the, you know, 50s or something or 60s. Sure. Where it was like a glamorous activity. I mean, the subway is absolutely,

it might, I mean, great mode of transportation, but absolutely horrific. Yeah. They've also overcome the fact that they, they evoke a very disgusting place. Yes.

That's a great, that's like a train car. Subway's kind of gross. The sub itself is like a little train car. Yeah. That's like usually like loaded with piss. And it smells like shit. And there's trash on it.

Why don't they put that on the walls? I feel like train cars are that loaded with piss and shit. The ones I, after I'm done with them. Do you know what trains are for? Yes. Bathrooms. No. This Saturday after Weigel,

it became a huge train officially in Idaho. Let me just say, I'll offer a brief defense of L.A.'s metro system. Well, some areas are underserved. My dad worked for the T. I like trains. Well, the, I'm thinking of New York specifically.

They should run more trains. I mean, when they called themselves Subway, they weren't thinking of the T. No. No. They were thinking of New York, which is like, but, you know, why? Yes.

It's a very weird decision. And I do think it is just because the loaves of bread is like little choo-choos, Nick. Well, I think it was, like submarine sandwiches are a thing. You say sub sandwiches, it's just upon on sub sandwiches, right? Subway.

But the graphics on the wall. Yeah. They definitely are the graphics. I always did, I always did put that together as, but maybe I'm, maybe I'm being crazy here. The, I always put it together also as like a sub,

like, like it was a subway train. I thought I was supposed to be like a train. If they had trains. I think it's called a train. It's like a sub sandwich, but it's also subway because the subway, it is like a, yes, you're right. It's like a little train car.

We're all saying the same thing. We're all saying approximately the same things. I agree the subway imagery is a weird fit for a sandwich chain. Yes. Okay. You love trains. I like trains.

Look, firehouse subs is fireman themed. That's also weird for a sub, all these sub places are kind of weird. I mean, I feel like a firehouse is a nice place. Yeah. Okay. That's true. The ones I've been on floors are clean. Agreed.

All right. What was your issue? What the fuck? What is quiz notes? You just get so defensive because it's a subway. Yeah. I like trains. You should be the next subway spokesman, except,

but they're not, they're not, we know they're not going to let that happen after Jared. They're not going to let Wagga come on board. I got Italian BMT. Yes. Lettuce. Tomato. Onion.

Pickles. A little, little bit of banana peppers. Very light because it's going to, I'm going to give me the rumblies, Nick. Yes. And then I loaded that thing up on red wine vinegar. You asked for a lot of vinegar. I asked for a lot of vinegar, which I think to me,

so in the, like the last few months, I had gotten into, we went to Jersey Mikes and I feel like we were nice to Jersey Mikes. And then for lunch, I got it a few times in the last like four months. Yes. And I got an Italian sandwich from Jersey Mikes. I think it's the six or the eight inch, whatever,

which one it is. And I was like, damn, they make a good, this is a good Italian sub. And so that's why, a part of the reason today I was like, I want to try this Italian BMTC, how it stacks up. And it's good. Yeah.

It's not bad. I mean, it really isn't that bad. It is a, it's not like, I mean, the godmother over on your Bay cities on your side of town. Well, I can't compare it to a one location restaurant. But I'm saying like, like a good Italian sandwich. It's not, it's not a great Italian.

Sure. I even looking at it, I felt like it was like someone you invite to a party who just sits in the corner the whole time. It had that vibe on the table. Yeah. It's a Y group basically. If you come to the parties.

In my defense, I did not know he was going to do that. I'm saying, yeah, you know, you're right. It is. It's kind of like I who, I'm in Nick. I mean, I'm being accurate here when I said it was like, Oh, 100%. Yeah. I'll bring my switch.

No, I can't. Would you really bring a switch to a party? I read that Mike Singletary, the Hall of Fame linebacker for the Chicago Bears would bring books to parties because he's very like shy. And I was like, oh, I could be like Singletary. Well, I think, I think it probably helped that he was Mike Singletary.

Yeah, that's true. He's kind of unapproachable. He's like, like, oh, like as a celebrity. Yeah. Do you think he actually played football so he could go be good cool enough to go to parties? I want to know what books he was reading. Who knows?

Maybe a John Grisham thriller. That seems about right. Or a book on bears. That would be cool too. He could have been researching bears. Why am I? My team called this. It would be one.

I got to learn and learn about it. That's a little in fact in each other. The first thing they do is they teach you why your team is named. Wow. Yeah. I had to learn what a senator was. Wow. Yeah.

We won't get into what my high school mascot was, but I was an Ithaca bomber versus kind of weird for like a hippie-dippy. Is that? Yeah, it's aggressive. Is that a relic of like World War II? Is that what it is? Yeah, bomber planes.

Yeah, they're building them in Ithaca or something like that. Yeah, who fucking knows? They just like the idea of bombing. They build them in China and they glue them together in Ithaca. I mean, I always find it insane that the Miami Hurricanes, this is a phenomenon that kills, you know, thousands of people and, you know, no one seems to have a problem with it. Yeah.

That's crazy. They should change it in Ithaca bombers. You know what I think it is? I've put it together. I think they were named the bombers after the birthday boys started up and we started doing shows at ECB. I think we were called the Ithaca bombers and then that just stuck. Do you really believe that or is it?

This is something I really believe. But the Italian sub was, it was good, Nick. It was a... I had a bite and it was fine. I was like, if I wanted Italian sub, Subway was the only option. I'd be like... Sure. I didn't like it as much.

I didn't love it, but it's fine. Now, here's my sandwich ranking. Your chicken Caesar wrap was number one. Wow. I agree. I'd agree. Number two, though, was my Italian sandwich for me. Really?

Three RJ city was your sandwich. Oh, wow. Four was that steak and cheese wrap. And then five was that ciabatta bullshit sandwich. I thought that was the worst one. The pesto? Yeah, the pesto. I found the pesto very overpowering.

Yeah, that was kind of my... I mean, it was my least favorite. It was pesto-y at least, but it was good. Yeah, I think I probably agree with you overall. I got a couple cookies. Peanut butter cookie and a raspberry cheesecake cookie. Peanut butter cookie was fine. Raspberry cheesecake cookie was great.

I thought it was great. Much better than I'd expect. I... Okay. I'm sorry. I mean, I thought... What the fuck is about to happen here? I don't know.

I just... I found... It felt like a delivery system of flavor, and I didn't get enough cookie vibe. Do you know what I mean? It was almost like... Yeah, it was almost like having a lot... A lot going on with it.

A lot going on with it. Yeah. It was almost if you had like an ice cream with like gummy worms on top, and the gummy worms were just all you could taste. Yeah. You know that type of thing? Yeah. That's a great thought.

Like an ice cream with gummy worms. I love them. Ice cream, I love it. But gummy worms and ice cream, wow, you can keep them separate. Get that out of here. Yeah. You know what?

Gummies, cold gummies. When they get cold like that, I don't want them to be cold. The gummy gets... The gummy hardens, and it's harder to eat the gummy. Yeah. You guys can't see us.

He's standing up right now. He's taking the mic off the stand. It's not easy to get Mitch to stand. Piece of shit. My general stance is gummy ain't yummy. But I think... I hate the stance. It's bullshit.

Cold gummies, yeah. That's just like the texture gets real. My sister and I were talking about this when we were... I recently visited Cape Cod when I had like a day in Massachusetts. And gum... Remember gum ice cream? Like bubble gum. Fuck that.

Bubble gum ice cream. I hate that shit. Bubble gum ice cream was so big. And then I was trying to remember like... What the fuck were people doing with that? I know. But I also remember loving it as a kid. And I don't know if all of it...

Like did all gum... Did all bubble gum ice cream... Did all of it turn into gum in your mouth? Or did some of it just ate? I don't know. Some of it turned into gum. But it didn't all turn into gum. It had like pieces of gum in it that you turned into gum.

But I feel like there's got to be... Look, I haven't had a bubble gum ice cream in a very, very long time. But I remember loving it as a kid. And I feel like there might be some version of it. But I also... I'm like... I don't like little pieces of gum in it. So you know what the thing we had that was approximating this?

We had the Sonic the Hedgehog pops. Yes. And I don't think that counts. But they had the gum... This is true. I do remember this. They had the gum ball eyes. This was with our buddy, Jocelyn Richard.

And they had the gum ball eyes. And you eat them. And it's just a gum ball you got to chew. And it's fucked up. Because you're eating ice cream. But you swallow the ice cream, but you don't swallow the gum ball part. I'm looking at a bubble gum ice cream.

There's got to be some good version. Someone knows there's got to be a good version of it. Where like maybe there is... There isn't. It's a flawed concept. But maybe there's one where there's like no flavor. See, there's one like... Look at that.

That bubble gum ice cream looks fun. No. That looks fucked up. And are we sure that all of it turns into gum in your mouth? Not all of it. The ice cream part is ice cream. The gum part is gum. I know.

That's what's fucked up about it. I know. I'm saying like, is there a version of bubble gum ice cream that's just the taste? Or it's just like... I'm trying to... You know what I'm saying? It's trying to be like, this is a bubble gum.

It's that flavor. It's true. And you're not getting the little bits of gum. Hard. It's like putting a whole shrimp in your mouth. You are so mad you hate... And then you got to pull the tail out. Oh, God.

Whoever has done that ever... That's what I'm saying. Whoever would do that. That's the equivalent. That's a cat. That's a Heathcliff or Garfield. Yeah. That is a Heathcliff.

Well, Heathcliff would take like a whole fish. Like a shrimp. Like a shrimp. There is... I think there might be good bubble gum ice cream out there. I don't think it exists. All right. Well...

One does exist. Hashtag bubble yum ice cream. So, RJ, and you guys both got some chips. Yeah. I went with Doritos, which I've kind of... You know, I have two children who recently discovered Doritos. Wow. And they could not be more thrilled.

Yeah. They're very excited. One at a time. And also... But the new thing is they have this organic Doritos. You guys... Oh, no. I haven't had them yet.

You should have them. They're wonderful. I actually found... I think... So, my most recently consumption of Doritos was the organic Doritos. I think I prefer them to the real... Wow. Like the nice Doritos I felt was just too much...

Too much going on. Too overpowering. Right. After having them the organic, which I liked a little more subtle Doritos. I was proud of you for getting the Nacho Cheesier Doritos. I think that that's just a classic great Doritos. Yeah, great Doritos. It's great.

I got... What I got here is the Baked Lay's Barbecue. And I did not open the bag, Nick. I didn't... We didn't even try them. So, you still got to stay there later. The bag... If you open this bag, there's nothing in here.

It's a magic trick. We never... Should we try them? No. All right, fine. We won't. What are we going to get? We know what Baked Lay's taste like.

Sure. I think the Baked Barbecue Lay's are decent. I don't want to die in five minutes knowing my last thing was trying potato chips. We're not going to kill you at the end of this podcast. Oh, it's not how it works? I was looking forward to it. And I got a Hubert's Lemonade, which is their big lemonade brand. They're pushing there.

They're pushing that they have Hubert's Lemonade. Really pushing it. They had Minutemade before? I guess so. I think it was Minutemade that they had before. Hubert is a big brand, I guess. I guess so. It was fine.

I didn't taste any... I didn't taste... I had the Arnold Palmer or the Nick Wager version of this. But I didn't taste Hubert's on its own. How was it tasting on its own? It's fine. I mean, it tasted more like real lemonade than like a country time lemonade or whatever. Okay.

Here's what I'll say that they had the little lemonade... What are those? Not just... Oh, the Agua Frescas. Yeah, they had some. I don't know if that's a subway staple now or if that was unique to that location. But yeah, I got a picture of those. And I got a little taste of the...

They had a berry one that I had some of, which was quite nice. Yeah, they had the lemonades. But not just... What is another word for that? Like the lemonade dispensers or whatever. Like the bubbling... You know what I'm saying? It ends up like an Orchard...

A fountain drink? Or a Tamarindo. And they were next to the fountain drinks. And they were like... Those things were like the... Oh, yes. The bubblers and it bubbles to the top and then comes down. It's cool looking.

Those are cool looking. And you know what? I tried lemonade from the bubbler one, the Agua Fresca ones, and then from the... Spicket. Yes. From the soda fountain. And the one that was aside from it was better. The actual lemonade container ones were much better.

Yeah, I think the product's probably fresher. It's maybe not shipped there in a sealed plastic bag. I had a weird experience with the drink where there was... I was hoping to get a coffee. There's coffee on the menu. And then when I said, you know, do you have coffee... She pretended like I was the crazy one. And she kind of said, oh, no.

And which was a little bit like, well, I don't know. I'm not a big fan of those situations where it's like you're being the rational one, but they pretend like you're nuts. And they clearly do have coffee at Subway. They have coffee, yeah. I think they might have been so mad at us for the gigantic order. Right. And it comes in waves there at Subway.

And then we were like a terrible... Like it was like, oh, three people, whatever. And then we were like a terrible wave where there were six or seven sandwiches made for them. But there should be coffee at Subway. I mean, look, I don't go to Subway expecting coffee, but I do expect it to be treated with respect. Maybe it went out with Jared.

Maybe it felt like with Jared. He demanded coffee. I kind of feel like people going into Subway, you kind of like... You don't have any self respect for yourself. They treat you like shit. Yeah, exactly. That's part of the... Well, let's get to our ratings here.

Each go around and we'll give this a... Give our final thoughts on Subway based on this visit, prior subsequent visits over the course of our dining lifetimes, and then give it a rating from zero to five forks. RJ, you are a guest. We'll begin with you. I think Subway all in all delivered tonight. I was a little bit thrown by the whole Shabbatah wrap option.

I feel like they're getting off brand with that. That said, I thought your Caesar wrap was absolutely delicious. I thought my simple sandwich was delicious. Overall, I thought this was a pretty strong experience. I think if you order right at Subway, you're going to be fine. You're not going to be vomiting all night. I would give this a three and a half. Three and a half forks.

Wow, that's a score. I was happy. Yeah, that's a good... You know what? In my head, I'm thinking along the same line. Look, none of us like Jared. It was a terrible mark on this place's history. Don't put words in my mouth.

I'm sorry, RJ was defending Jared throughout the meal. Nick was as well. I was the only one who stood up. I don't know, guys. What a crazy hit for that place to take. Yeah. But also, like, it's a... What?

I was just going to say, arguably, Subway took the hit from Jared Vogel easier than Buffalo Wild Wings took the hit from Steve Renizese's 9-11 lie. He was their guy? He was their guy. And that was kind of like more of a reset for them. They had to completely rework their campaign. They're not as big of a chain.

That's true. Whereas Subway was just sort of like, ah, Jared's gone. They tweeted that out and then they just had... They would just start with $5 foot long for a little bit. Yeah. Guys, it's a tweet. It's not a big deal.

It's more of a tweet. We're past this. I don't know. I think that Subway is good in a pinch. Yeah. I think it's a place where, like I was saying, if it's 11 p.m. and you don't want to go eating a burger, you can get a turkey on wheat bread with some Swiss cheese

and it won't hurt your stomach. Like we were talking about, it's not going to give you the rumbly snake. It's not going to make you feel sick. Today, the quality of the food today actually kind of won me back a little bit because I like to be mean to it because I used to not like it. And then I grew to kind of like it just because

the way you can customize stuff is easy and you can make a sandwich taste good out of just forcing flavors onto it. It's still not like the best, but I mean, it's true. It's a force though. They're not resisting you in any way. Well, a lot of the times you can make a sandwich, like your sandwich tonight,

like that is a good sandwich, but like it is a very plain basic sandwich. Like there's like toasting it. There's all these little tricks there that you can try to make your sandwich taste a little bit better. But overall, the sandwiches are not that good. Yeah. There's a bar that they can't get over.

And I think the Jersey Mike's, now that we've done a lot of these places, like they're clearly like firehouse subs Jersey Mike's clearly better. Clearly, clearly better. Even Witch Witch. Clearly better. Yeah.

Which Witch, I don't know. That was a mixed, mixed, mixed experience for me. I'd rather go to Witch Witch than go to Subway. Interesting. I maybe wouldn't. I'd rather go to Quiznos than go to Subway. Sorry. This is your time.

I'm stepping on it. No, no. I'd like to, I also like how you said that. I, I'm going to go three and a quarter forks. Three and a quarter forks. Okay. Fuck Jared. Yeah.

But what Subway is, I do. I think it is, it's a, it's a, it's a place where you can also pick up a bunch of sandwiches for people. It's, it's easy. It's fast. I think that, I think that's one of the biggest things that they have going for them is the real estate, the speed, the speed of which you can get something,

get in there and get out of there. Yeah. And the fact that I usually, if I get the right thing, I don't feel like shit when I'm leaving. Again, a great on the road. Yes. Pickup room. Right.

Yeah. You know what? I almost, I was, I was in a rush and I almost got a turkey sandwich on the road just the other day. Right. And it's like, oh yeah, I can eat that in the car. It's not going to spill all over me if you get like low. You know what I mean?

If you customize it to be whatever. But yeah, not a great place, but, but it still deserves to exist. Right. You keep grabbing your mic for emphasis and it's creating a, well, who cares? Then they hear the emphasis. I think a lot of people don't like that sound. I'm just saying, I think we're going to get some comments that Mitch is

grabbing the mic. That's what you're thinking of. No, it's not the only thing I'm thinking of review. What, what else are you thinking of? All right. Subway. I agree. I agree with Mitch.

Jared Fogle is a monster. And Subway was right to sever ties. I'll also say. I believe Steve Renize easy. He did survive 9 11 and Buffalo Wild Wing should give him a second chance. But it's a very strong take for a guy who admitted he wasn't there. I will. You know what?

I'm a Renize easy. Truth or even he isn't, even he isn't on your side, right? Look, but you know, I had a night. This was a bed. The best subway experience I've had in a while. It still wasn't that good. I, I'm going to say. I don't even think you can think of a subway sandwich as a sandwich anymore.

And the same way you don't really think of a McDonald's cheeseburger as a burger anymore. It's not really the same thing. It's like Subway's. Subway's does a good job of being Subway. It's so predictable and specific. And it does that. And if I'm judging it by those standards, how well does Subway execute being itself? I don't know what rating I can give it other than three forks.

It's just a solid three fork option. You know exactly what you're getting. If you've been there once, you know what you're going to get every single time you go back there. Don't stray too far from what, from their predictable offerings. Don't try to get too fancy with it. Stick with what they can do. Well, stick with what you know that you've gotten from there that succeeded previously

and you'll be just fine and you'll get the subway experience that you expect. And you know what? You found the perfect, perfect replacement for Jared. Steve Ranazizi should be Subway's. We are not good at this. Hey, that was our review of Subway. It's time for a segment. We've got a food stuff.

Before we do the segment, there was something that came in the mail and I think we should just talk about it quickly. Okay. It's a very nice envelope. There's a wax, like a little, what is that? Wax stamp. Yeah. Put on the envelope.

I think we got invited to a wedding. Ooh. Should I just open it and see if we got invited to a wedding? Okay. We might edit this out because I'm not going to go. Whoa. What? I'm sorry.

I might go. Are you sure it's for us and not for you? It might be just for me. I mean, that would be funny if it's for us. Was it addressed to the Doughboys? Cody Wall and Sarah Slaughter. A shotler? A shotler.

Invite you to celebrate their marriage. It is for us. Congratulations. That's amazing. It is for us. 1 October 12th, where Portland, Knicks, not going to go. We're going to go. Yeah.

A wedding ceremony or something. We got it. We did. We got invited to it. We got invited to a wedding. Does that happen a lot? No. It's never happened.

I think it's maybe happened once before. Wow. Nick, the food, vegan, vegetarian, and meat options. I hope there are like six people who've sent us wedding invitations that you've just never opened, Mitch, who are just steaming right now. No. Oh, funny. It's my job to open a new piece of shit.

This is a beautiful invitation. It's very nice. It's wonderful. We'll check our schedules. Nick, you're definitely not going to go. I can't go. RSVP, you know. Congratulations, Cody and Sarah.

Very, very cool. Yeah. That's awesome. I had to open it. It's been sitting there for a while. I thought maybe the date had already passed. You know what date is almost past? The date and our next item.

We've got a food set. We've got an expiration date. It's snack or whack. We've got these M&M's that we got. This was for the M&M's. They do expire at Christmas. This was for the vote for your flavor promotion that happened in January of this year. It's now this episode is out in August.

I'm just saying. They're a few months old. We completely missed the window on these. I'm concerned. So we've got a few flavors here. The first one is Mexican jalapeno peanut. We've got a yellow peanut in a sombrero holding some chili peppers. I got a Thai coconut peanut.

What garment is he wearing? Oh, this is awful. It's Jared is standing behind us. It's a yellow peanut M&M drinking from a coconut. Oh, that's cute. I got the English toffee peanut. It features a very stereotypical representation of a British person. Got it.

These are interesting. There's three colors in this. That's it. There's green, lime, green, blue, and then kind of like a whitish. This looks like it's green, yellow, and red. So they've really gone with a very simple tricolor execution of these. I'm going to take a taste of the Mexican jalapeno peanut here and then I'm going to pass these over.

Thai coconut. What is it going to get? Thai coconut. What am I? Just Thai coconut peanut. Oh, wow. Interesting. Contest ends May 3rd, 2019.

Damn, we just missed it. The England, Mexico, and Thailand. So we completely whipped on that. Okay, I'm having the jalapeno one. I will say it. I'm some of a heat seeker. It actually does have a decent amount of spice. More kick than I expected.

Yeah, I'm going to try this guy over here. I'm going to try these English toffee peanuts right now. You know what I got to say about the jalapeno ones? The colors evoke kind of a jalapeno-y. There's a dark green and a yellow and a spice. I got to say, English toffee peanut. I kind of like it. I kind of like it.

I kind of like it. Someone's like, we should make these all white. You have this one, Mitch? I have not. No, thank you. All right, turn that over. I've had the Thai ones and I'm about to eat the jalapenos. All right, I'm going to have this Thai coconut right now.

Yeah, blue, lime green, canary yellow. Oh, there is a little bit of heat to that jalapeno ones. RJ does not like them. This is a clear one for me. I don't like the coconut. I mean, I like coconut. I mean, I'll take a mounds. I'll get an almond joy.

That'll sometimes do my choice from the vetting machine, but... The coconut ones taste a little too much like a drink. Like a... Yeah. Like a pina colada-y type of drink. It's like an artificial coconut syrup as opposed to real coconut flavor. I'm just remembering my parents spent hundreds of thousands of dollars in my education. I'm just sitting around going,

Ah, this is good. Sorry, dad. No. My father has passed, but I would apologize to him every episode, if not... You go to his grave after every episode, right? We do. Nick and I go to his grave and we apologize for the previous episode. Sorry.

Mitch and I actually got in a... We got in a little tiff on text messages with our buddy Evan Susser. Actually, it was Mike Carlson on that thread too. I think it was the four of us. And we were arguing over who would be more likely to go to the other's funeral. That's right. And you say because I'm someone who does... It was the kind of person who doesn't go to events that I wouldn't...

I would absolutely go to your funeral. You read a book. I read a book. Yeah, I bring my switch, but I go to your funeral for sure. I was shocked by that. I kind of wanted your answer to be no so you would be looked at as a villain. Why would I not go to my friend's funeral? And then he said you would pull a spade with Farley thing where you say,

I couldn't see Mitch in a box. Which is just not true also. No, yeah. I think it's not just going to the funeral. It's how you behave in the funeral that's really the key. Yes. If you're just kind of... I don't know, making all about you or something.

I don't know. Right. Maybe it's better. Pulling a John Landis. Oh, Jesus. That dude's funeral. Who was the actor he killed? On the Twilight Zone.

Oh, Vic Maro. Yeah, Vic Maro. Vic Maro's funeral into this grandstanding self-aggrandizing speech. She talked about how this film was Vic Maro's finest work. He told me how proud he was of it. It's a fucking piece of shit. But you notice something came out, okay? In fact, I'm getting a push notification here.

Subway's new spokesperson, Max Landis. Wow. Wow. Guys, maybe we should stop doing spokespeople. We're not good at it. We're literally throwing darts hitting all of them. I mean, I don't know if I'm jumping the gun here. No.

To me, it's clearly toffee dye jalapeno. And I'm not sure what jalapeno has just walked into a party. It's not supposed to be. And it's talking to everyone. And I don't know what they're doing in the M&M's bag. I love it because I love spicy. And I think that chocolate's spicy. It reminds me of sometimes you get that spicy hot chocolate

and that kind of works for me. I think this is like a hot chocolate, some cayenne pepper. But the English toffee for me is clearly, that toffee flavor is very good. It's a lot better than I expected. The toffee peanuts works really well. It also makes sense for a minute. It makes sense.

Yeah, that's the clear number one, jalapeno number two, and then a distant third for me is the tie coconut. I got news. I think all these are not great. Wow. I think that they're all not. Your life is as sweet as yours, Mitch.

M&M's Kempos. I think you're right. Here's another confession. Not a huge toffee fan. Sticky toffee gets in your teeth. Boy. That makes sense. But this is...

I just think that the English... I think the toffee in this one is just very... It's very strong. Wait, I got a good one. If you like toffee, hashtag toffee is for closers. I don't like toffee. Hashtag toffee is for losers. Go on, Mitch.

Hold on a second. You told me you had a good one? Yeah. I'm going to raise the bar super high. I think the toffee flavor is a little strong. I agree with you that the coconut one is weird. I didn't like the jalapeno ones in first taste, but as it's gone on, it's grown on me.

So I'm going to go toffee jalapeno coconut. But I don't think any... I think they're all very close in quality. I don't think that they're very good. I think any of these necessarily has staying power. I think that maybe I could see the toffee peanut being on the main roster if they actually do elevate one of these. Here's the M&M's that they need to have.

Peanut M&M's. Which do they have? Peanut Butter M&M's? Peanut Butter M&M's. They have those, yeah. Regular plain M&M's, even though those are the ones... I know, I know, I know, I know. But you just need them.

Never happy to have them. You need them to put them in stuff. As a baseline? Yeah. And then finally... As a baking ingredient. The rice M&M's. Crispy rice M&M's.

Oh, those are good. That's it. No more M&M's are needed. Pretzel M&M's. Oh, Pretzel M&M's. Nick, you got me. You got me. Pretzel M&M's also, they belong.

This has internationally inspired flavors. Yes. Is there something... Is there a market they're not hitting that they're trying to get to? I don't know. I think they're just pulling bullshit and trying to hit a new flavor that people...

I mean, you know what? That's the whole department's called that. We're just pulling bullshit. I think they do... I think that the Pretzel M&M and the Rice Crispy M&M's, whatever, it's not Rice Krispies itself, but the Rice M&M are two ones that they tried those out a couple decades ago or a decade or so ago,

and they worked out, and I think they're trying to just get another hit like that. None of these are... None of these work. I admire the attempt. But yeah, I'll probably go... I'd probably give a mild snack to my top two and a whack to.

There's some executives blew his brains out. It's all three, you know what I'm like? I'd say soft whacks to all of these. Boy, Jesus. RJ, snack or whack on these? The Toffee. Snack. The other two I...

Whack. Yeah. Well... Fair enough. That was snack or whack. Just like a restaurant. I'd buy your feedback. Let's upload the feedback.

And hey, we have a voicemail. Let's take a listen to this one. Here we go. Hi, Nick and Mitch. It's Sam. I just had the Cheddar Bay Biscuit Mix from Red Lobster, and it was a revelatory experience. Wow.

So I'm wondering if you guys have had any other take-home, make-it-home experiences from fast food places that you think live up to the real thing. Thanks. Wow. Thanks, Sam. Thank you, Sam. I have one answer to this, and it's not really make-it-home.

I don't know if I've ever done any make-it-home fast food stuff. I'm trying to think of like... Oh, you know what? Puppa Gina. But that's still... You just put it in the oven and bake it. I think that counts. That's the kind of thing that's being discussed here.

Puppa Gina's has that. Here's the one that I think is good. Yeah. And I've never had the actual place, is the weird thing. Is the White Castle microwaved burgers. Yeah, you talked about these before. Are actually weirdly decently good. Mm-hmm.

You pop them in. You split them apart. You open the bag. You pop them in your microwave for like a minute and 10 seconds. Yeah. And they're weirdly tasty. I've never had White Castle burgers before. Yeah.

But I've enjoyed those. We've talked a little bit about the Boston Market frozen stuff back in the day was good. But specifically make-it-home stuff, I can't think of anything specifically right now. There were some... Because Marie Calendars, which is a... I first knew as a chain before I knew it as a place that offered frozen meals. Oh. And honestly, it was like a birthday chain for me as a kid.

I loved Marie Calendars. Mm-hmm. And Marie Calendars has a lasagna that I think is pretty good. And their pot pies, obviously, I think, to absolutely get the job done. But they used to have some meals that were just like a... It was just like a one-pot meal, basically. And it was a thing that would be... I think it might have even been the refrigerator section.

Maybe it was in the freezer section. But it was a thing that you'd just sort of saute. And it worked really well. It was something about doing that as opposed to putting it in the microwave. It gave it a good amount of flavor. So whatever that Marie Calendars thing that I have a foggy memory of is my answer. RJ, any grocery store or to-go approximation of a fast food restaurant item that you've ever had that's worked for you?

As someone who respects the improv, I would love to say yes, and I can't. I mean, I just... Nothing comes to mind. It just seems like... I don't know. There's something about seeing a restaurant thing in a freezer that just throws me off. It's... I don't know.

It's just like... I don't know. Seeing a friend in a state that you rarely go to or something. That is weird. It's... I don't know. It's... That's...

I'm having some kind of mind-fuck when I think about that. Like, I only... Right. It's like, you do... What you do is you make the food in the restaurant and I don't know... I'm not sure these two skill sets overlap that much. The frozen food thing is like it's all other thing. I mean...

Right. Yeah. Except for ice cream. Yeah. You know what? But honestly, I think that's a pretty good answer. Because, you know, some of those... Like...

I feel like the Ben & Jerry's packed pint is like... That's on par... It's great. Yeah. It's like... And they have... They were parlors first, right? So it's like...

Yeah. I think that absolutely is a good execution of what they're trying... What they had in the store. Yeah. Um... That does run... Like, I did... Do you remember we saw our friend Nick up in Portland?

Mm-hmm. And we had... Like, we were up in Portland doing a show and then we just went to a restaurant just to, like, get something to eat, like, after or before the show. Yeah. And then that... And then our friend Nick was just there randomly. Yes.

Yeah. Yeah, that was wild. Like, he lives down here. Yeah. It was like, what the fuck? We were just so like... What are you... We were both confused about what we were doing there.

We didn't... We didn't... You didn't know we were in town? We didn't like it. We liked him. But we liked him. We just didn't like the situation because there's too much. It's like, what's going on here?

Yeah. Yeah. It's very unsettling. Um... I know exactly... I mean, it's like, it's like, I mean, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like you're walking down by places like fast food restaurants trying to do, like, it's heated at home.

So like, sure. TGI Fridays, wings. And then you mean them like this sucks. It doesn't really work. Yeah. It's a different mix. And also, I don't know what the appeal is of... I might as well just cook at home or eat it there.

Yeah. I'm not sure what the appeal is. It just seems like a lot of, a lot of steps to eat this food. Sure. They're like potato skins or something like, oh, the TGI Fridays potato skins. Potato skins. But then also like, when you get those, you're like, these are not going to be as good as when they fry them at the restaurant or whatever they do.

They've invested thousands of dollars into getting that right there. Yes. So there's no way unless you have the machinery at home. I remember I used to get like the, like the, you know, the taquitos and I would have them at like, you just put them up in the, put them in the oven or put them in the microwave or whatever. And they were like always okay. Like at the toaster oven, you could maybe get an okay texture from them.

But like I, for a time I was just like, man, I got to get a deep fryer. Yeah. Like just so you can get some like, you can have good taquitos. Yeah. We all had that day. Man. Talk to your family. You probably have fucked up a fucked up fry hand.

And I'd always be looking at your fucked up fry hand. Did he reach for something to premature? Yeah. He probably put his hand in there or something. I don't know. He did. He fucked up to, he fucked up. Yeah.

Someone who spills as much as I do. I shouldn't be around boiling hot oil. I'll give a question or comment with the word of the chain. Rest on Gmail. So don't always podcast at gmail.com or leave us a voicemail at 830. Go doh. That's 830-463-684-4. And hey Mitch, we're about to go on the road.

That's right. Well, pretty soon we're going on the road in September, early September and. What? In Boston. What? Wait, wait, wait, wait. Am I supposed to say something? We took this up beforehand.

You're supposed to. You said that we weren't going to do that. You said we're going to wait. No, I said we were going to do it. I said we weren't going to do a separate read. Send some drops so I can play them at the live shows on the road. If you have something specific for. We're having fun over here.

Now say it, not like a jerk. For DC, Philly, New York. He's incapable of that. DC, New York, Boston or London. If you have something specific for one of those locales, go ahead and send them into what's the address? Spoonman drops at gmail.com. There you go.

And to get the double or weekly bonus episode, join the golden or platinum plate club at peterin.com slash dough boys. There you go. Fuck off. RJ. I'll make my own drops for the road. That's right. I'm going to make my own fucking drops for the road.

No, that's not true. Send them in. RJ freed. Thank you for joining us. Thanks for having us. Super fun. What would you like to plug? Oh God.

Cartoon president on Showtime. It's now it's it's streaming all over the place. Showtime. All over on demand. Yeah. Check it out. This this this season we we really open up the world, make fun of some Democrats, make some make fun of this president.

And yeah, it's a lot of fun. Please check it out. Um, you want to promote your best friend, Ryan Whitney's podcast? Oh, I'm sorry. No, don't. Don't listen to his. He made fun of one time. Well, for this week's episode of no boys on next time for Mike Spoon Mitchell, I'm Nick

Weigher happy. See ya. Mitch, you know, we've been working with the Santador Foundation here in Los Angeles to find some cats, some new homes as part of the Golden Paw Foundation Golden Paw Club, I should say. I mean, they're the foundation. We're just a club. Mm hmm.

But we've got a new cat this month for the Golden Paw Club. His name is Pauly D. He's a domestic short hair. He's gray. He's a neutered male. He was born in April 2009. And let me tell you, we got a photo of this guy. He is cute as heck.

He's very, he's a very cute cat. Hey, Nick, maybe he was born on April 20th, buddy. Hey, man. I can hang with Pauly D, bro. Uh, it sounds like you could kick your ass, but he wouldn't even hurt a toy mouse, Nick. By the way, that's directed at me specifically. Yeah, I know. Nick Weigher's ass.

He's a demine nude. He likes snapping under blankets with his butt exposed. Mm hmm. And, uh, it makes two of us. And he's a polydactyl. Too many toes to be a ballerina. None of toes to play a Jimi Hendrix song. That's right.

Nick, he has a big, softy heart and beautiful, softy fur. He's gentle and affectionate and likes to be held in your arms, especially if you can put his head in your armpit. And if you pay him attention and love, he will reward you with jewel and access to his belly, much like Mitch. And Nick, he hates being alone, also much like Mitch. Please come cure his loneliness with your heart in your home. Give this guy a home. For information on how you can help out and possibly find a home for polyd or one of the many other animals they have at their shelter, you can check out the Santador Foundation at Santador.org.

S-A-N-T-E-D-O-R.org. Also check out their Instagram, Santador Rescue. And you can find out how you can adopt, donate, and volunteer and help out cats like Polyd. I want to say that we have a good record going with these featured cats. Let's get Polyd in a home, too. Let's keep it going. Let's keep it going. This guy deserves a home.

He looks awesome. Jim, Tan, Laundry, and this cat. Double! On the next, Doughboys Double. L-A-Native and pro streamer Max Mayer guest to taste test a snack attack and build a Mount Beesmore of cutest critters. Plus, Max and you song nerd out over multiplayer game League of Legends while Mitch gets mad. Get the Doughboys Double every Tuesday only at patreon.com slash Doughboys. Double!

Double! Double! That was a hate gum podcast.