Doughboys - UNLOCKED! Doughboys After Dark with Marisa Pinson & David Neher

Episode Date: November 26, 2020

Unlocked and free for all! Fan favorites Marisa Pinson and David Neher return to talk kissing, air fryers, and cats, followed by a discussion of their favorite midnight snacks.Advertise on Doughboys via Gumball.fmWant more Doughboys? Check out our Patreon!: https://patreon.com/doughboysSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The following is a free preview of Doe Boyz Double, our Patreon-exclusive premium episodes. Get new episodes every Tuesday only at Patreon.com slash Doe Boyz. Welcome to Doe Boyz Double, I'm Nick Weigher along with the Spoon Man, Mike Mitchell, for a late night record, Mitch. Very late night in the East Coast for you. The night time is the right time, am I right? Well you know, we're in the midst of rock around the clock doberfest, Rat Kadaba, and we have, as part of that, I guess just by coincidence of our guest schedules, we ended

up doing a late night record, which I guess is very on theme. This is very much on theme, and Nick, I'm excited to have our guests on. I am too. Hey, you're gonna like the way they guessed, I guarantee it. Very good, like the men's warehouse. Did you not like it? I liked that a lot. I did a, I directed a men's warehouse spoof that was a branded ad through Funny or Die

for Megadeth. Wow. It was for Megadeth's new album. So how much was, okay, and what, go on. And it started Dave Mustaine, the guitarist and singer of Megadeth, as the I guarantee it guy. But he was guaranteeing that the new album, you're gonna like the way it rocks. Now, the thing that I just did, you're gonna like the way they guessed, I guarantee it.

I bet you it was funnier than that entire sketch. I assure you it was. I watched the sketch. What was the total production cost for the sketch, and then what did you pay, I don't know, Joe Hartzler or whoever was in it? They were complimentary, what was the verbiage on that internal document? They were included. You look like the Bohemian rap, you look like the Bohemian rap city video.

So basically my issue is that I am, because of the lighting situation in the office where the home office where we're recording, and because there is, my overhead light is out and our shitty building won't fucking fix it. I don't blame the guy who would actually fix it because he's just overwhelmed, but the building is just like mismanaged and this guy doesn't have any time to fix it. So I'm just in the dark right now. You look like a kind of a spooky floating head, yeah. Yeah.

You're also wearing a black shirt. Our guest said. That's true. Our guest put it the funniest way, it looks like you're filming your manifesto. A lot of our guests, or it would be funny to picture them saying that together at the same time, but wise I'm down here in the basement. Yes. I'm now about a week out of having done my trip down to New Haven and renting out a theater

for only a hundred bucks, but I watched Tenet and got some pizza, but I don't have COVID, which I was afraid of, just because it's dangerous. Only a hundred bucks in these trying at all times. Yes. I know that's a lot of money. I'm saying to rent out a whole theater, that's cheap. It is cheaper than you'd expect this day and day and the day and the day because they are so fucking desperate to have any revenue at all.

I get down here tonight, I think I spoke too soon, my nose is running, but then I remember this couch is filled with feathers and I'm allergic to feathers. You gotta stop sitting on this down couch. There's a bunch of feathers in the couch, so my nose is running. I got a headache. Find a better spot to squat. Stop sitting on that down couch. No, I gotta sit down here.

It's not worth your getting your nose and your allergies acting up. I got a question for you before we have to introduce our guests because we're wasting their time now. Do you think in the last four years, how many times do you think Trump fucked in the last four years? I think it's entirely possible that it's zero times. You think zero? Just be a non-sexual man.

I was wondering if who fucked more me or him, but now with your answer, sounds like a tie. He could also be a fuck machine, I don't fucking know. Some of these old guys are surprisingly virile. Yeah. Yeah, I don't fucking know. I don't think he is. Anyways, I suspect nothing. I want to get that question out quickly before we started.

I was going to talk about I got the Burger King Long Chicken Sandwich today and it was really good, but I'll just leave it at that. Wow. Let's introduce our guests. They're a comedy power couple. Wow. I would say actors, writers, comedians, good friends of the podcast, Marissa Pinson, David Nierer here.

Hi, guys. Hello, great to be here. Hey, Nick. Hey, Mitch. I'm really missing the experience of being in Mitch's house. I know. That's really like, this is tough. Yeah, no one's there right now.

It's just completely empty, up for grabs. Do you think it's been burgled? I was scared of burglars. I put in an alarm system while I was gone. Oh. Oh. To protect what? I mean, no offense, Mitch, but all those paper plates stacked up on the table.

You know, I've grown attached to them and I don't want anyone to take them. Well, you seem really happy. I've been noticing in these past episodes that you've been at your mommy's house that it seems like you're really, really much, much happier. Well, to put it not so strangely, mother brings out the smiles in me. Oh. Very good. I mean, you're living, that's like a mommy's dream, like the son coming back to be taken

care of as a grown boy. We've gotten into like little spats here and there, but it's been good to be here. You always kiss and make up. Is it because you keep peeking? OK, though, this is a real question. If you kiss your mom on the lips because David kisses his mom on the lips, but not his dad. Interesting. I did kiss my mom on the lips for a very long time, but it's only now she'll be like, give

me your head is what she'll say, and she'll kiss my head. She's like denying you you're going for the lips. And she's no fucking cockblock, dude. Oh, she's not. She is not. I got I got it when a lot of people made fun of Tom Brady, which look, I understand they're making fun of him for a lot of a lot of reasons. But when he kissed his his kid on the lips, I didn't think there was anything wrong with

that. And I said that. I don't think that that's that's a bad thing. But yeah, a little. How old is the kid? How old is Tom Brady's kid? I think like 10 or something around there. That feels close. I don't know. That's cute.

I kiss my mom on the mouth and I'm not afraid to say that. I I like it, David. I think I think that's I think that's a nice thing. I my my mom, I don't I don't do it anymore. But there was I did it probably till I was 12 or so or 13. Oh, so you stop at a reasonable time. I'm much older than that. Well, here's here's the deal.

I wasn't kissing any other girls. So I felt like it was weird to continue to kiss like the only lips you're kissing. Are you if it's a year in review and the only lips I've kissed as are my mom's. That's pretty bad. So that's pretty bad. David's dad started trying to kiss me on the lips like after David and I had been dating for like a year. He tried to make that a thing between us because like their family did it. And I had to kind of like stop him.

And like, I kind of became like the butt of the joke in the family. Like, I'm a weird one because I don't want to kiss this man. I've known for a year on the lips. I don't kiss my mom on the lips. Like just give me a kiss. I stopped kissing my parents on the lips, both of them, like the same year. It was just like I was like eight or nine. I don't know. I think I just was like, you know, I'm done with this.

And it was September 12th, 2001. And and then I and then I just didn't do it anymore. And I don't I could not imagine kissing my dad in any capacity. My mom and occasional like, yeah, it'll be like maybe like I'm it's an embrace and like a head kiss or something. Maybe like a cheek kiss. Yeah, Marissa makes it seem like it's a sexual thing because I never kissed my dad on the lips, but I kiss my mom on the lips.

And your sister kisses your dad on the lips. So it matches the appropriate sexual attraction gender. Right. And I can't explain that. It just doesn't it just feels maybe I don't know how to defend it. Prove it and kiss your dad. OK, I'm going to kiss my dad on the lips. All right, I'm going to kiss him on the lips for like 10 seconds straight. And I'm going to open my mouth.

Yeah, my dad is the only way to prove you're not weird. Can weiger and I zoom in too? Yeah, we should have a Twitch stream for that. There you go. With this tension in your marriage over this issue, it makes me think of like you have a child of your own. How what is going to be the kissing protocol with your charge? When they're little, you kiss them on the lips.

Like I think there will be a time when it feels like she's aged out of that. But when they're little, like you want to kiss them on the lips. Like I kiss Peggy on the lips. Good night. She doesn't love to kiss, though. She she she really held out on kissing on the lips until just like two months ago. Yeah, I did some studying listening to podcasts that you're not supposed to coerce children into kissing you on the lips like, oh, come on, give grandma a kiss.

What are you doing? What are you holding out for? They give grandma a kiss because then it teaches them like, OK, coercion is like OK. And like one day, whenever they're being coerced by some gross person, they'll feel like their dad obliged to do it. Pincet Marissa. My air fryer is about to beep.

I don't want to be loud. Air fryer. Wow. That air fryer beeps so loud. So you have an air fryer, right, Mitch? I do. Yes. Not in Massachusetts, but in in Los Angeles, which is one of the things I set up my burglar system for. I don't want to get out with the air fryer.

The air fryer beeps are so fucking loud. And I like googled it and people are like, how do I cut? Can I like open it up and cover it with tape or something? Because like the beep is like it beeps like 50 times. Like it's not an emergency. Like it's my tater tots. Like I don't need more than like one beep. And if you got a sleeping baby in the house, that's that's not helpful.

Exactly. I air fry in the living room because I don't want her to hear the beeps because the kitchen is closer to her room. I know. What now, what model air fryer are each of you working with? This is actually really appropriate to today's topic. Because do you also think that they have separate air fryers? No, I was talking to them and to you, Mitch, you're an air fryer owner. No, I don't think they have his and hers air fryer. How great would that be, though?

Huh? Yeah, it sounds actually sounds pretty awesome. You know, wow, you know that the boys air fryers fill with wings. Yeah. Yeah. And the girls, it's filled with veggies. No way. I have a, we have a I, we have a Gourmilla, Gourmilla air fryer, and it's really good for reheating pizza. Wow. Yes, it does a great job at reheating pizza. It's it's it's maybe my favorite way to reheat pizza.

For sure. You get a Gourmilla? No, Nick, I have a Kusari. His names are so exotic. They're like Wayfairwayfair.com child slave bureau names. Is that makes sense? It does. It certainly it definitely makes sense. Yeah, it's not because you're. Oh, I get it, man. I totally get it.

We all believe it was real. It was real. Nick, what air fryer model do you have? I don't have an air fryer. But you know, who did just get an air fryer and who just texted me photographs of Natalie, Panko pork chops that no, not my wife, Panko pork chops they made tonight. My mom and dad. Wow.

And in fact, it through through an intermediary, me, my mom consulted with the Spoonman, Mike Mitchell, regarding her air fryer purchase. She didn't get the one I said. Wow. No, she got she got whatever one they had at Costco. What the hell? I mean, she was just like she was the one at Costco was on sale. She was just like, I'll get this. It's affordable. Nick, you can trust Costco.

You can trust Costco. They have like one microwave. It's like, OK, it's a pretty fine microwave. You know, one type of folding chair. Get four of them. They'll be fine. You guys are big fans of Costco. Oh, yeah. Yeah. We got we got there a lot, especially pandemic shopping.

I've been buying so many boxes of mac and cheese and. Wow. Pasta. Oh, my God. Pasta sauce. Tubbs, the amount of peanut butter that this family goes through, it would make your bones quake. It would break your bones, which you would you would be crippled from just looking at our pantry. I'm sure of it all fell on top of her.

It feels like by the way, Nick is sharing the text from his dad about the air fryer and it says this is the air fryer we got. By the way, remember when you stopped kissing me? Question mark. What's up with that? What's up with that, dad? I'm a new I'm a new Costco guy. I'm a new I brought my Costco card home.

There actually are some in Massachusetts. Wigs. Yes. I didn't realize that there were many Costco's because we have BJ's out here. We got BJ's wholesale. Right. And that gives us a shit out of me because I always think of BJ's brew house. Yeah. The the pizza and beer place.

Yeah. Funny name, but it's a fine. I mean, it's just that's just dad's having a lot of fun with that. Dad. Yeah. We got to go to BJ's then. Yeah. You have your wife getting a BJ's from your mom for once. The kids goes over the kids head. They're saying that to the child. It's into the kids. The kids don't get it.

They don't understand. It's like a joke in a Pixar movie. That's just for mom and dad. That's a joke in a Pixar movie. Yeah, I think so. I think that one's in Monsters U. I wonder why you've never got to rid one of those minion shorts that you want to write for.

Got to RIT. Never no wonder you never got to RIT. That's what I said. To Costco after samples are have gone the way of the dodo. Yeah, that's very sad. That's a bummer. It was such a huge part of the Costco experience, especially when I was a kid. Oh, yeah, we would make a lunch out of that for sure.

Do you know what I sampled that at BJ's wholesale club? A teaspoon of cum. Egg rolls. David, thank you for your guess of egg rolls, which is appropriate. Yes. So who was closer? Well, you know what? It's going to be harder to tell who is closer, because what I sampled at BJ's wholesale club was Sonic the Hedgehog, the first Sonic Sonic one. I played Sonic one.

So Marisa might be closer with teaspoon of cum. Sure. The fan aren't any indication. What a game. This is but this wasn't recently. This was when you were a kid. This is when I was a kid on a kiosk. Yeah, I played it on a on a on a kiosk. Yeah, that's why I said, and it was my first time playing the game.

And wow, I was impressed with how fast he was. Yeah, anyway, the speed is unmatched nowadays. The first time you're seeing a new video game is watching a YouTuber do a speed run. Here she goes again. OK, started on these. You take her. I will say Twitch to me, it's when I first saw it seemed absolutely insane.

Yeah, and it still does. I still am flabbergasted that millions of people watch it. I I Jack, you know, you guys both know Jack Allison. Jack had a Twitch channel and I played. I played like scary games on there for a while. And it was it was a surprise to me just even how it was set up. And it's like such an elaborate setup. And it's so over my head, but I just maybe I'm at the age

where I just don't understand how all that sort of stuff works. I get, you know what I mean? Like, it's it's just the next level to me. I don't I don't I don't really get it. Nick, have you, Nick, you've you've never twitched before, have you? I mean, I've guessed it on other people's streams. Yeah, and but I don't have my own Twitch channel. I do watch Twitch and I find it just it's.

The thing I'll say is there's some play. There's some gamers with just such a level of mastery, just such a high skill level that I'm just like, this is amazing to see like it's like watching any athletic feet or like watching like a high level poker player. It's just like, oh, this is amazing. This person can do this thing that I can't do. And some are genuinely entertaining.

Yeah, it is kind of a generational thing. I feel like most of the Twitch audiences, you know, teenagers or tweens. Well, speaking of which, this will show you how productive I've been while I've been at Quincy. I have 105 stars in Super Mario Sunshine Wags. Wow, look at you. I'm going to play through it. I'm going to 100 percent it.

That's my plan. Wow. And that's not an easy game. It's not an easy game, but one of the more difficult 3D Marios. I think that if you told me from age six to age 25, well, so age 37, that when I was 38 years old, I'd be in my mom's house and have 105 stars in Super Mario Sunshine. I think I'd probably die from excitement that I was going to be able to do it someday.

You're living the dream. I never have to stop. Yeah. Is it? Is that is that an old Mario, I guess? Yeah, it came out when I was in about came out when I was in college. I think maybe my like sophomore year of college somewhere around there.

2002, I believe. Oh, so maybe my freshman year. Gamecube. Yeah, it's a gamecube. And they re-released it as part of Super Mario 3D All Stars. So there's three of the 3D classic 3D Marios in one package. And that's what Mitch has been playing on his switch. Yeah, I want to pivot real quick before we get into the topic at hand.

I did want to touch on cats. You have your two cats, Cosmo and Fig, who you are cohabitating with. And how is the how the cats been responding to these trying times to everyone being in the house all the time? I think they love it. We just got them during COVID. Because we have so much time. Yeah, whoa.

It was kind of like a like a COVID panic move, you know, like. Feeling like we needed some new novelty to like change the trajectory of the day, just like to mix it up because we're just getting so bored. And so we found these two cats and we had a really old cat who went to went to Kitty Heaven. She was like 20. I'm sorry. Yeah.

And so, you know, it was a long, happy life. But when you're used to having an old cat and then you get like one year old cats, they're fucking crazy. Like, yeah, they're boinging off the walls, like jumping, catching flies, like swinging and flopping. And if you turn your back on your meal for a second, they're like on the table, eating your food. It's like, wow, they're like chimps.

Like it's crazy. Yeah, they're I mean, it's a lot of fun. It's fun. Yeah. They're also snuggly, which is good. It just this touches on the topic at hand. But they're very similar to the Mogwai that come out of of Gizmo when you put water on them. They're they're right.

A little zany. There's that you picture that you picture cats to be like to to to be like Gizmo. You think they're going to be like Gizmo, but they are they're not like Gizmo. They are they are they are like a stripe in like the other. The I forget what are some of what are the names of some of the other ones? Wager, I mean, other than I don't fucking know. Wingnut, crispy.

I don't know why they never gave wingnut his own movie. There should have been a there should have been a wingnut spin. And I think is one. Yeah, that's right. Janked in is very gremlin like they are crazy at night and they do the thing. I don't know if Wally and Irma do this, but like, do they go crazy? Like you hear that cats are nocturnal and like we all know that. But our cat used to our old cat would snuggle up and sleep under the covers with us and like be like a teddy bear and just sleep all night long.

And these cats, like when the moon goes down, when the moon goes up, the sun goes down, they're like Mogwai mode. Yeah, I had to like keep them locked out of our room because they were just boinging all over us, like biting our feet, licking our faces, like wanting to play. So they got they don't sleep with us at night. They're banned. Wally Wally has been he's jumped up onto like I have like a like a bookshelf, not with books on it, with other stuff.

But he jumps up to like the top shelf of the bookshelf and then jumps down onto my bed and then he gets on the on the nightstand and he tries to knock. He tries to knock the mirror off the wall. He's knocking the mirror off the wall. And then he's crazy any painting. And then they'll get they'll get zoomies. Well, first of all, Irma's jump in the baby gate.

I already said this, but Irma's jump in the baby gate with this. The intention of the baby gate was to like barricade the cats. My mom got the baby gate to one, keep the cats upstairs. And then she eventually wants some sort of grandchild. So I think that it's going to carry over for forever. When I for for whenever I can produce an offspring, she wants that. So the baby gate is for now and later, but it's for the cats at the moment. But that's this seems really early on the on the purchasing of there's

also passive aggressive signal there, I feel there's also there's a crib in my room right now as well. I sleep with a pacifier in your mouth. It's for the baby. Later, I think a baby gate. I'm sure your mom is, you know, a very smart woman, but a baby gate is not going to stop a cat. Yes, you know, as I said, I was talking about this last night, David.

I said, it's like putting a step stool in front of Shaquille O'Neal and wondering why it's not holding him back. He's going to just step right over that. We'll just step. No problem for Shaq. But you know what's going to happen. Got famously long legs. He's good.

But Wyger, he's going to do something. He's going to do something funny, though. That's he would do something funny. Yeah. Yeah. Irma in the same way as being funny with it. She so she she wasn't she wasn't hopping over the gate. Here's the thing, because the gate goes right to the stairs. So she was too afraid to do it, but she was hopping up and then standing

on the baby gate, but then one time the baby gate fell and she fell with it. And then she was terrified to ever do it again. The issue, though, is that there's a banister right next to the where the baby gate is. So she hops up on that banister and steadies herself and goes down. But it's very funny because she'll come down the stairs and she'll go, meow, and I'll go Irma. And then she'll run upstairs like she knew she did something wrong.

So it's a funny it's a very fun. Yeah, it's funny and sweet in many ways. But she slides down the banister like she's the cool kid in school. What's for breakfast, Mitch's mom? I would be delighted if she did anything like that. And your mom, because she kind of sounds like she kind of doesn't want the cats in the special rooms. She's chasing the cats with a frying pan.

She is chasing the cats with a frying pan. And I'm also chasing them with a frying pan, but I'm licking my lips. It's one of those situations. But but no, she's she she doesn't. You know, she had she had a cat. She had we had a cat zip for twenty two years. Yes. So so that's that's a that was also an issue is that, you know, Zippy Zip was an outdoor cat.

She was one of the greatest cats, but she she still would rip up the furniture. Then Buster we had and Buster got to Claude. This is the 80s. So don't get mad. But but but so she like went through all of that. And then also at the same time, Nick, there's a leak in the ceiling. I get home. I start showering in the shower. Wait, is this contemporary? We're still in the past.

No, this is now. OK, this is now. OK. This is talking about cats do with this. Buster had nothing to do with it. Zip is not guilty of cats. This is in the last few weeks. I mean, Wally and Irma, they they are suspects, but it's most likely me, the three hundred pound son, who's in the shower and the shower is leaking. The showers is leaking through the kitchen ceiling.

Plumber came, guess what? Clogged up with come. Oh, classic. It was like the samples from BJ's. Remember that was going around where it was like the college that like the drain and the boys dorm. Yes. Oh, yeah. Fogged with come. Is that true?

I think that was someone printed something up and then took a picture, like taped it to a bathroom wall and took a picture of it and uploaded it for clout. I think that I don't think it was an actual issue. You say it now is really obvious that that wouldn't be real. It was like a letter from the dean saying, like, please stop jizzing in the drains. And now that you say it, that would never happen. If you were it is pretty gullible.

I when we back in like two thousand and twelve or something, when we first started going together, I convinced her, her and Jenny Pearson that like guys will like hold in farts for a really long time and like the pressure will build up and I like it'll stimulate their prostate and like it feels so good. And like you can like come. Yeah, you said that guys jack off with like big farts, fart bubbles in their butt. Oh, my God.

Stimulates their prostate. And we believed you. You're like, no way, really? I'm like, yeah, you can like hold in farts. And like, I mean, that's what like butt sex is, you know? Do you know the same thing? Nick and I are going to try this tonight, for sure. Yeah, I was going to say, you know, it's not real

because if it was one thing to like help the owner, you know, David would have done it because he's like. It's like a boner king. Like, I think that was a compliment. That's beautiful. You know, if you if you open up the door to the bathroom when I was in the shower in college, I'd ride out of that thing on a surfboard. Jacking off all the way through.

I mean, where else are you supposed to? I mean, I'm sure that it happens in college. I don't think it's that crazy to think that it might be partially true. I think I was private. So yeah, they're private. Yeah, in my dorm, they were private. But it was like you could like it was the the walls didn't go all the way to the ground. It was like there was it was like a bathroom stalls.

I was like, like so there was like you could see other people's feet down there. Did you glue like a little mirror to your foot? Yeah, I was trying to peep on my shower mates. What's up mirror foot? That's what they called Liger on his floor. That's a really like unflattering view of a guy, though, probably just like the other side of like a falls. Yeah, I got to be.

It's a I just I would I have I just I just didn't do it because I was like I don't have a private space around. I mean, for like the when I was in the dorms, I was just like, I was not going to do this. But you're cranking your car. Really? I just wasn't doing it. You asked to be cranked in this car. Yeah, not four years, but when when he was at graduation,

he's like, give me the diploma. Quick, I'm holding in the biggest fart right now. Yeah, why? Why could put his diploma up on the wall with no tape if you catch my drift? Redirection, yeah, let's get into Midnight Snacks, which is a world I don't understand. This was this was your idea for an episode.

And I will say that I don't want it was. Yeah, this was this was your idea. I will say that I don't have Midnight Snacks. I don't wake up at night and I'm like, oh, I'm hungry. I'm going to make myself a big Dagwood sandwich. Like that's never been a thing that I've done. I can't recall ever really waking up.

And if I get up and have anything, it's a glass of water because I've I've parched because I've been sleeping with an open mouth. Fucking snooze city. But I don't sleep with an open mouth. Yeah, I sleep with a big. I have like a big open mouth. I'm an open mouth sleeper.

I'm a drooler. You have to help out. Well, the tea bag Tommy doesn't come. Never foot and tea bag Tommy. That was that was Why Gras Floor. Well, I I'm not a wake up in the in the middle of the night and eat person either. I'm interpreting this as like you already had dinner.

Maybe I eat dinner pretty early. And so this is like a late night additional munch before bed. I'm not really waking up and eating anything. Right. Yes. I think that this is a post dinner snack. You've had post dinner snacks. Why are you right? I've had post dinner snacks.

But I'm curious, Mitch and David, did you guys do you guys get up and have a have a snack in the middle of the night ever? Thank you for the question. Why are you I don't I have friends and family members who will wake up and be like, I'm kind of here. I'm going to go have like a cup of yogurt or, you know, like lunch on a sandwich.

And to me, that seems absolutely insane because my thing is like I want to sleep at night. I wake up and I go and pee with my eyes still closed. You know, if I have to pee and then I just go back to bed, sit down on the toilet and pee. Yes, because there's no splash. You don't worry about missing, right? So I'm sleepy and I want to stay sleepy.

It's not like me hungry. I only have a meal like that seems like you're going to wake yourself entirely completely up. You might as well watch a little boob tube while you're up at it. So no, I don't do the midnight snack. I never have, but I have had it. Well, Mitch, I'll let you answer that that question. I I know why I have not like in the cartoons,

woken up in my PJs with a sleeping cap on and gone to the fridge and made like a big sandwich. I don't know if that I don't know if that is real outside of like. It's absolutely real. There are people who do it. Yeah, people will get up and like, really? Yeah, people would like get up and make themselves like a grilled cheese sandwich or or they'll like fucking heat up a burrito.

People will eat or just eat a whole jar of olives. Yeah, my mom does that. Like we had Chinese. We ordered in Chinese for the other day and she like was waking up in the middle of the night and eating like walnut shrimp. That's that is that's a wild midnight snack. I completely agree.

Yeah. Now, are you thinking of Homer, Wyger, when you say people? Yeah, that long sandwich that you keep next to your bed and you keep it on the first of the episode. Midnight munchies. But you both must be up in the middle of the night taking the baby has to be fed. The baby's crying.

That's like, is that ever an occasion where you're like, like, I'll get a bite to eat for myself? You know, fortunately, she's soups very well. So we're not we're not really up. I mean, she's two now. So she sleeps like fully seven p.m. to seven a.m. Wow, that's not the case for everybody with a two year old. Some kids are, you know, but we just lock her in and she can't get out.

What can I say? But definitely during that time, there was a lot of middle of the night, middle of the night munching. But since then and we go to bed so, so early now, like it's such a cliche. But like before we had a child, we would stay up. Like we were living like we were teenagers. We would stay up until like four a.m. playing NBA Jam.

We would just be like to talk about midnight or risk or risk. Just like really just getting fired up on a monopoly board. Just like going totally wild. And we would drink a lot or I would. Marissa never really drank, but we would drink. We would smoke weed. We'd have a good old time. We're in our early 30s, you know, having a blast.

And that's when midnight munchies would come about. Wow, you get your you get your drink on and then you get your stink on, which by stink, I actually mean snack, which is kind of a weird way of saying it. But well, no, this the stink of a snack can stay on you. Like if you eat Kuro's Doritos, that stink can be on you for a while. And that's exactly what I meant. Thank you, Mitch. But we would we would go ham.

We would Tater Tots were a massive hit. We would go ham eating ham. We would we have Tater Tots right here with us. Like a little callback blast from the past. Wow, we would that that could feed a lot of hungry people, you know, a whole bag of Trader Joe's Tater Tots. With ketchup and mustard. And there were what else would we snack on back in those days back in the

two thousand teams frozen mozzarella stick? I mean, I wish we had an air fryer's have only been around for like one year because it everything is just so air fryer's are made for like little anything you want to get crispy. So like a mozzarella stick, a Tater Tots, like a fried wonton, a little dumpling, a little whatever. It's so good in the air fryer. It's so fast.

Mozzarella, the game changed for mozzarella sticks with air fryer's. It really did. Totally. It's in there's so much easier to make wigs. I don't know why you don't have an air fryer wager. Well, I think the the for me part of it is the food you're describing are. I mean, I just I'm already eating like shit. I can't eat even worse than I'm already eating. Like I'm having mozzarella sticks in the house.

You don't keep that kind of stuff in the house. Any any crunchy munchies? I mean, I, you know, I'll have like chips, but I try. I used to be a guy who'd have like to Keto's all the time. We go to Costco, get that fucking 30 packet to Keto's or the big ass thing of corn dogs. I was having those and I just like, I can't do that to my body anymore. It's just too much. I like I like to start the day really healthy.

So I'll have David's special porridge, which is filled with seeds and quinoa peanut butter and so healthy. And it's like, OK, so lunch goes a little off the tracks. It's like no big deal. I started off strong, you know, dinner. We get a little silly, have pizza. And then after dinner, we get we get a little whack you do and we have an ice cream sundae.

Wow, I mean, don't make the mistake that like now we're like dork health nuts. Like, oh, no, we just we just do it earlier. So like we have dinner early because we eat dinner with Peggy, which will be at like six and then when she goes to bed at seven or seven thirty, as soon as her little fuzzy head hits the pillow, mama and data time to party. So we have a little saying, don't we, babe? When the baby goes down, yeah, we don't don't around or mess around

because we're eating silly foods. So I'm talking like literally. Can you just can you can you just clarify what the saying is one last time? Well, it was when the baby goes down. We don't frown around because it's time to eat silly food. Silly food. Right. This is I'm telling you, there's a nightly hot fudge sundae. Wow. Pretty much.

But it's not. It sounds like every night I we we get a jar of hot fudge. You put it in the microwave. You pour it over some vanilla ice cream. I like an ice cream with a mix and David's more of a purist. I like like a hog and dogs or something with a little bit of action. You know, sure. Yeah. And no, it's funny with an ice cream sundae. I like some mix ins.

I'm with you, Marissa. But when it comes to an ice cream sundae, Sunday, when it comes to an ice sundae, I am more with David. I like to do a traditional vanilla and chocolate scoop of vanilla, scoop of chocolate, hot fudge, whipped cream on top of it. That's kind of that's that's my that's around going with Sundays. It's a great cream. Yeah, throw some some like nuts on there, some roasted.

Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. And then you've got a cherry in the fridge, which sometimes we do. Yeah, throw that maraschino cherry on there just for one bite of like a sweet burst of cherry. It's fun. Yeah. You don't know that you can't you can have an ice cream sundae every night. As long as it's not like crazy huge. That's the thing, like growing up, we would have big old bowls and, you know, it led to some, you know, that you just you just don't want to go too big.

That. Thank you for bringing that up. You want to go small. I was like, I don't care. Yeah, do whatever you want. But I will say, like, in terms of your digestion and your and your health, I because I that was the same thing in my my family growing up is I thought just having ice cream for for for dinner or after dinner every night was normal.

I thought you just like, oh, every family has like a bowl of ice cream for dessert. And like, I mean, a bowl like a cereal bowl with like two or three scoops. It was substantial, but it sounds like you're describing a modest sundae. I'm glad you mentioned the cereal bowl because most families, that's what you do. You have your one standard sized bowl and that would apply to cereal, to spaghetti, to ice cream. Yes. That's your problem. You're going to want to fill it up and you're going to add like five,

five more scoops than you would if you have. We have like these little random cans of these little little bowls. Almost looks like a like a cup, like a measuring cup. That same size. And then you can load it up. You can like pack it in there, pour on the fudge. You feel totally satisfied and you can have an ice cream sundae every night. It doesn't even feel like we're doing like a little like naughty diet ice cream sundae.

It feels like this is just like dessert and you don't get a tummy ache, because it's not too much. You know, you know, you know that there's freaks listening to this right now that eat their Sundays on a fucking plate. You're just fucking there. Better not be a joke about that, man. That's fucking weird. I don't want to think about those freaks.

They're out there, man. They're I mean, look, it's Halloween season. There's that we got some there's some freaks out there and they're listening to the episodes. Nick, Nick, you know, this is true, Nick. Mm hmm. There's a lot of plate people out there in the world. There's a lot of there's some plate freaks out there. I just looked at you and you just you gave me a reaction. Just dead faced.

I'm listening. Is there a burger or a table freak off plates? They're using spatulas instead of spoons. It's chaos. It's a burger boy. Burger boy. Thank you for bringing that up, David. Burger boy is a table freak. If something falls onto the table, he likes it. He likes this ice cream straight off the table.

This I don't would never. Oh, come on. You do, though. Even a table freak has a line. Would never use a spatula to eat a scuba ice cream directly. Really? Yeah, I would never do that. OK, well, it seems like you're full of shit and you're just lying to us. It's so it's so hard to maneuver anyway to try to get that spatula under there on the table.

You got nothing to push up against. Yeah, you're right. It takes a lot of practice. You would know. No, you've mastered it. Any time I do it, I mean, any time someone would try to do it. Look, I think you're going to even do that. You got to use some salad tongs or something and get a grip on it. It's the only way it would ever work. OK, all right. It was like, I guess we know how he does it now.

He uses salad tongs. Yeah, I'm fucking freaked out. We got to change the topic. Now I'm going to ask you, do these ice creams, do these count as your midnight snacks? Because for me, I think that does count as a midnight snack. Their dessert is a given that the enough time goes between dinner and the Sunday to make it constitute as a midnight snack, I would say.

Because dessert, you you eat right away, right? If an hour and a half goes by or an hour goes by even. I think an hour limit is I think an hour limit is I think that's good. I think once an hour passes, it's no longer dessert. This is now a snack or midnight snack or another meal. I don't know. I don't know what it is. But to me, the meal as coined by Taco Bell, it might be for a meal. Or to me, Nick, this is midnight snack.

This is this is the zone for midnight snack. I know it's called a midnight snack. But for me, a midnight snack, I think 10 p.m. on unless you're having a late dinner, late, late, late dinner, 10 p.m. on that's midnight snack territory. Right. So you kind of got a window with like 10 p.m. to 2 a.m. anywhere in there is kind of midnight snack territory. And then after 2 a.m. you've got like a weird like Mark Wahlberg breakfast,

like how he gets up at 2.15. Yeah. So yeah, it's had some liquefied chicken breast. Yeah, his schedule is insane. So when I was I was at I was at SNL, I was at the SNL that the rock hosted. They were trying to get like some of the biggest muscle guys in Hollywood to come to the SNL. And they were like, the rock's going to go soon. He usually wakes up at like three in the three or three thirty in the morning to work to like start his workout.

That's really sad. Miserable, just a miserable life, a horrible life. Yeah, because like he does not have ice cream. Yeah, no, he has a cheat day. He has a cheat day. I think his cheat day is bullshit. He has this thing that I think it's just social media posturing. He has this cheat day on Instagram and he shows his like huge

like he has a giant plate of spaghetti and like three bagels and, you know, like a fucking slice or like a whole like Dutch apple pie. And he's like, cheat day, I'm going to eat all this. But then I don't know. I don't think he's actually eating it. I think it's just for the gram. Take a bite. Yeah, take a bite. Fucking take a bite, Rock. Take a bite. Right here.

Live, do an insta live. I think you should. I think you should put an insta live together. I think we need to see this. I now that you say that, I remember seeing the rock holding up a ice cream sundae on a plate, if I remember correctly. That checks out. So the dude's a freak. He's a he's a plate. He's a plate freak.

All right. So look, we got to get into this because we got to rank. We have to rank our midnight snacks. I have some stuff. I'm going to get it. Oh, wow. We have a special. We have a special moment because it's actually going to blow your mind. Marissa has stepped away. I have some stuff, too. But I my unfortunately, I'm doing intermittent fasting

and I'm not supposed to eat right now. Right. Oh, yeah. Don't break that for this. And I for this for this dumb show. So the midnight snack thing. But I'm going to tell you what I got. I told my mom to buy some midnight snacks and I'm going to tell you what I got. And I will eat these during the week.

My midnight snack will be closer to 8 p.m. But I'll just start off. Listen, what I think is a good midnight snack. What I've always liked is a midnight snack. OK, for me growing up for midnight snack, there's a couple of things. First of all, cheez-its and goldfish, goldfish and cheez-its. Those to me are midnight snack things.

These are things when I come home, you find them in the cupboard, some goldfish. Everybody loves goldfish. And also those extra toasty cheez-its now is what I would like to have. But cheez-its, those are two big ones for me. Courantieritos, of course, if I'm going to 7-eleven. Gatorade, Gatorade is one of my midnight snack drinks. I'm always drinking the Gatorade. Try not to do any caffeine when it's that late at night.

Right. And then for me, another big midnight snack. And this so to me, this is something that like it feels like you're actually like eating more than just a snack. And I know it's chips and salsa, Nick. I like some chips and salsa. That's a lot of fun. I'll say just to kind of run through my personal midnight snacks, ice cream aside, ice cream kind of its own thing.

And I have less of it at night these days. And so also, you also said that you don't believe in midnight snacks. So these are things that you're imagining would be fun. Well, no, I if you're going to if you're going to broaden it to include things that you will have late at night, I, you know, again, I'm not someone who does that a lot, but there are. But that's more in my wheelhouse. Like I have had a lot of late night snacks.

I'm just not someone who interrupts his sleep to go have a big meal, like some people do. But so so historically, it's been things like taquitos, like I mentioned, microwave burritos. But also a big one historically for me is cereal, like a bowl of breakfast cereal at like that's good. That's like midnight. Wow, Marissa is holding a bowl of cereal aloft.

What do you have there, Vincent? This to me is a top tier top tier cereal. If you're not like a big sweet person, to me, cereal same is the perfect thing to have after dinner. Yes. This is a bowl of frosted flakes. Wow, Marissa. That Dave has one as well. Brought and Dave, you you help.

That's what Weigher and I said while we said, wow, wildly there. I knew you were good. You're you were going to have your minds blown here because we both have a bowl of frosted flakes. Wow. There's no way you could have expected that. So I understand you're excited. I honestly have not had a bowl of frosted flakes in a very long time.

This used to be through my childhood, the go to like you. Guys, that's great cereal. This is this frosted flakes is my favorite cereal. I love frosted. It's so good back in the day. We just recently got some cereal to have as specifically for midnight snacks. And we got cinnamon toast crunch.

Wow, Reese's puffs and honey nut cheerios, which were so good. Honey nut cheerios are great. And also I feel like, look, there the sugary cereals aren't great for you, but honey nut cheerios aren't bad. And and frosted, you know, worse. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, they're there.

You could do way, way worse wags, but also frosted flakes on the spectrum of of very sugary cereals is not super high up compared to almost anything else. Captain Crunch feels like you're eating sugar. Comparatively. Yes. Should we take a bite, babe? I just took a bite.

And I'm 100% really allowed. It's so crunchy. OK, let's take our first bite together. OK, one, two. David, I don't know if you heard, Marissa, I think said that she had a no, no, that was I think that was her first bite. It's so nice to share things as couples.

God, that is good. Now, what are you guys using? What is what is the milk? What do you got for milk in that bowl? I think we truly have every iteration of milk in the refrigerator. We have whole milk. Wow. I don't mean this to be a brag.

Whole milk, half and half, heavy whipping cream, oat milk, and almond milk. Wow. So this is what you're holding aloft. Almond milk. And this, they have a really good deal on a six pack of almond milk. And this is kind of the go-to for cereals,

for oatmeal, for smoothies. Oat milk goes in coffee. And then, you know, you just have to have a suite of milk to choose from. There's not one that works for everything I've found. What kind of milk is your mom's sport in there? Is she the type of mom that's saying only real milk? I don't even want to talk.

I wouldn't even consider the other milk's milk. My mom, the milk in my mom's fridge, it's in a big, it's in a big glass container and she won't tell me where it comes from, but it's milk. That's all I know. Weird. She re-cantors it into a different thing. She has. She has skim milk to answer for real.

She has skim milk and she has lactose-free milk, which I requested. I'm now, I am on the lactose-free milk train. I like lactose-free milk. I like it a lot. Interesting. We are, there's usually an oat milk. I felt judgy, by the way, but go on.

No, it's interesting. My brother does the lactate. He does the lactose-free milk. I messed around with it. I don't like the flavor, although I understand they've tweaked the flavor and it's less punishingly sweet these days. To me, I can't even, I really can't tell the difference,

honestly. Yeah, I've heard they've made improvements. We generally have oat milk and almond milk. I'm more of an oat milk man. I've really gotten into oat milk and what Marissa was talking about at Costco, the Kirkland Signature, I don't know if it's a Kirkland Signature,

if it's another brand they have there, but they have like a six pack of oat milk you get there. I never would have thought of bulk buying it, but it's shelf stable. You just put it in the pantry. It's wonderful. Wax, I got a big question for you. Are you ever worried you're gonna go to grab oat milk

and then like, if there's gonna be ice over a G, you're gonna accidentally grab goat milk? Well, that wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. That's not a good, because you can drink that, but I usually will just, yeah, it's if there's like goats, like there's cartoon goats on the container. Are you worried that there's gonna be

a little ice over the tea and that you're actually gonna get oaf milk? Yeah, that could be a problem. Well, shit, we all remember what happened to Ernest when he was going for meac, right? Is that a deep cut? Remember like the Halloween one? Of course, Ernest.

Well, we'll catch that. Ernest scared stupid, he's like meac. Ernest scared stupid, yeah. And that kills, that ends up, it's helpful, it ends up killing the trolls that the milk causes the trolls to die, I believe. I think if Ernest- Can you use some of that for my Twitter mentions?

Pfft. Pfft. I think Ernest pours the milk on the trolls and they get so upset they kill themselves. I think that's how it works, but I haven't seen the movie in a long time. Wow. But from what I remember,

that's what happens in that children's movie. Yeah, it's really gruesome. They all do it in a different way. One guy like puts a shotgun in his mouth and pulls the trigger with his toe. Yeah. There's a guy who puts Nikes on and then drinks a serum

and then lies down to bunk bed and says he's gonna send to a different plane. Ha ha ha. It's really weird. Which as a kid, I was like, what is that? I like your shoes, but. So you've got the Frosted Flakes you're chomping down on, yeah.

I just, you talking about putting on Nikes and drinks, you look the creepiest you've ever looked since we started recording the show. You don't like me just recalling specifics about the Heaven's Gate cult? From a dark room. It's terrifying. Got it.

Are you guys watching the nexium, the bow? No, I heard it's very slow. I like it. I love anything cult related. Yeah, me too. It's a sex cult. How could it be slow? Yeah.

Yeah, do you mean like the sign up process is slow with the cult? Ha ha ha ha. Like they haven't answered your emails and you're waiting for them to get back to you. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. I gotta give a special shout out to Tina's Burritos,

which I've told you before, those to me were, when you wouldn't go full meal, because look, a midnight snack, a Mama Celeste counts as a midnight snack in my eyes. Sure. Ha ha ha ha. But Tina's Burrito is that line of just enough food, I feel like.

I mean, you can even toss in two, I wouldn't be mad at ya. But that's to me. We did a Tina's Burritos episode recently with our friend Jamel Bowie, and I think we all were like surprised by how good the Burritos held up. They're great. They're not bad.

They're very good. They're great value. Yeah. You guys have the frosted flakes. What else do you have midnight snack wise? So this is kind of a throwback, but my addition to it is new, and I ate this for dinner two days ago.

Tater tots, as you heard in the aforementioned air fryer, drizzled with buffalo sauce. Wow. And then dipped in some blue cheese dressing. Oh, that's fun. And this is a really good snack. That's, yeah, that's great. This is like, so this to me is almost,

this is, it's almost too good for most. Most fools won't be able to make this midnight snack. Right? I mean like. Fools like Nick without an air fryer. I mean. I mean, yeah. Take it easy.

And then I feel like, and also idiots like me who couldn't even think of buffalo tots, that's a great midnight snack. I never really ate, I'm a vegetarian now, but I, even when I was a meat eater, I never, I've never had a buffalo wing. Wow. Because I never liked like eating meat off the bone.

That always kind of like freaked me out. It was a little too like, like I liked a chicken finger or like a tender. And so I never had buffalo sauce until like five years ago. And now that I've had it, I'm like, I'm a buffalo freak. Yeah. I can't get enough of this stuff. Seriously.

It's getting, it's getting kind of crazy. I haven't brought this up, babe, but it's like too much kind of, and I'm worried about you. Could you please just go easy a little bit? Well, I don't have a fucking problem. So it's actually, you're the troll. It's like, why do you think you did too?

Right guys? I just think roasted cauliflower with buffalo sauce. Are you a fan? I think for any, for any wing fan, I feel like this is like definitely going to scratch the itch. Do you guys fuck with a buffalo cauliflower or as a buffalo wing? I've had that before.

I've had the buffalo cauliflower before. It works surprisingly well. It's great. The texture is, the texture is great. Yeah. Mohawk Bend has a really good buffalo cauliflower. Speaking of bones. Bone to pick with me.

No, never. No, not with you two. I love bone talk. Well, I got a good bone doozy for you here. Weigart Dano said that he had, he said that he was out having hot dogs the other day. And he said he had- Got a hot dog with a bone in it?

He got a hot dog. He got a hot dog with a bone in it. That's the, that is what it is. He got a hot dog with a bone in it. Like a bone? How big of a bone? That thing was just sucking a dick. That's, sorry.

That's, that's, this is how Nick thinks, by the way, this is how Nick thinks boners work. He thinks that there is a bone in the bone to this day. The bone slides out of your intestines and then up into your wiener flesh. And then you have a boner. Everyone knows that's how it is. That's, he bit into a bone in a hot dog.

And I, we said, how many did you have? He said he had six hot dogs, which I tip my hat to him. That's, that's a, that's a good number of hot dogs, but number, but he bit into a bone in a hot dog. Was he gonna have seven hot dogs before he bit into that bone? He maybe would have had seven. Dana would have maybe had seven hot dogs.

They don't- But what is it? What kind of, what amount of bone? Yes, exactly. I think that it was a, I think it was basically the size of the hot dog. And it was just a little fleshy covering. All right, we're, I, yeah, I'm lying.

I don't know the size of the bone. It was pretty big. Do you want me to text him? He's probably still awake. Yeah, find out. We heard a story about a guy who- I knew you were going to read this up. We have a friend, a friend, Mikey,

and he tells us a story. Mikey J is kind of like, like one of Mitch's friends. He's just kind of like a funny character. And he was telling us this story. He was like, yeah, this buddy of mine, he's in the hospital. Cause somebody served him a dog turd hot dog. Oh my God.

And we were like, what the fuck? And he was like, yeah, they, they, he went to their house for a barbecue. And I don't know, I guess they slipped a dog turd on the bun and covered it with toppings and he ate it and he got really sick. Fuck.

And then we're like, he ate the whole thing. It was like, yeah, man. They like charted up really good and they put a lot of toppings on it. Jesus Christ. Fucking awful prank. Well, the whole thing- Yes, they were somebody.

We were like, yeah, what? His guy's name was old Joey. And like, what did old Joey? He's like, I guess they were jealous of old Joey or something. I don't know. Jesus. That's fucking-

We were like thinking about it. It's like, could you take a bite of a turd no matter how charred, no matter how slathered in sauce? Wouldn't you know that? You have to think you would, I mean, you have to assume you'd know think something was up.

Yeah. It doesn't taste normal. I'm not gonna finish this. Even if you don't know what shit specifically. I'd agree with you. But according to him, it was charted up really nice and there were lots of toppings on it. And then he said he was at the hospital

and we were like, well, how do you know that's what it was? And he was like, apparently there was no issue with the hot dog. It was just like then later he got sick and we're like, well, how'd they know it was a dog turd? Where'd that theory even come from? And he's like, they told him the doctor told him he must eat a dog turd.

That is. There could really be like a serial type podcast just to try to like crack the code of this story. Cause like it just does not make sense. And I've been fast. We heard it like a year ago and I just like, I'm so haunted by it. I'm like, fascinated.

We, we, there's been some foul things on the podcast but that is the most disgusting thing I can think of. Truly, truly vile. Those guys were like watching him take the first bite and they're like, okay, now. Oh wait, he's still eating it. Oh my God. He ate the whole fucking thing.

Oh, another one. We only have one turd, bro. What do we do? We're gonna make another one. Make another one, dude. Squeeze your dog's belly. So I texted Dan, I said, you up question mark. What size was the bone question mark?

And he said, yeah. And then he knew immediately he said, less than a dime, like the size of a nail. That's what he said. Okay, so like a bone fragment. It's funny how just a little fragment can ruin something. We were talking about eggshells.

Like, have you ever had like, we were talking about this egg sandwich I had, this croissant egg sandwich across the street from round. It ruined me from eggs for so long. And I still, when I think about this one place, I think about it as the eggshell place. Just that bite is so offensive. It's so, I don't know why,

but it's like, I can't trust any bite after that bite. You're on edge. It's really unsettling for sure. Well, I've said this on the podcast, but my mom was making lemon chicken and I was sick and I smelled the lemon chicken and I threw up. I don't like lemon chicken anymore. I can't eat lemon chicken.

Is Thanos off of hot dogs now or is he still horking them down? Let's see here. He says he's eating one right now. Tell him to check if it's a dog turd. Just make sure. He says, oh, fuck it is a dog turd. Oh no.

And he said, and then he said, back to the hospital. And you see, I'm the type of person, if I, if I bit into a bone, I would be like really on it to try to get like free hot dogs for life. Yeah, I agree with that. Why not? I mean, if you, if you almost, you know what's funny?

Wig's favorite place in the world, we went out to eat there. Did we take Yousong out for, what was it? Did we take Yousong out for like his 16th birthday? Why were we there? It was his quinceanera. Yousong was, he was going back,

this was when he was interning for us. He was interning for our old podcasting company. He was going back to Cornell. Which shall not be named. And then he was going back to college and so he gave a little send off dinner at one of the Hillstone restaurants, South Beverly Grill. South Beverly Grill.

And then when we went to review South Beverly Grill, we went back there. And then you had the incident where you got a little bit of a bone in your French dip, which was unfortunate. I got a French dip. I got a bone in the French dip, but we did see Doc Rivers there. So that was fun. That was very cool.

And you have seen our own Schwarzenegger there, which is also fun. We saw, we saw Doc Rivers there and he was like, he was like, I'm really going to tank this Clippers season. And then he winked. It's weird. Do you guys have any more, any more midnight snacks that you wanted to taste test?

I have one here in the hopper ready to go. And I know this is really a controversial one. Please. So I'm really prepared for the haters to fire up their cannons. Okay. Let's, let's, let's, let's hear it. Wow. Mr. Olive spicy pickles. Bread and butter pickles.

Wow. And I know this is not everyone's favorite pickle. Certainly not for a snack. To me, I like to get my little thingies in. This is my personal jar. No one else touches this. David, is this true? She means little thingies.

She actually has this one inch long fingers. I get a little guy to visualize. Yeah. Reminds me of a certain president. Liger. Please don't bring up that orange question right now. I swear to God. We said we were going to be nicer to him going up to election.

I just, I had to say it. He has, he has small hands. Marissa, I think that a pickle is a great midnight snack. It's something that I like to snack on. Here's the deal. It's great. Low calories. It's got, it's barely got any calories. You're eating a cucumber.

It won't weigh it down. Which by the way, I asked Wiger this the other day. I said, if you had to eliminate one vegetable, and then I put like a bunch of things on it and said a lot of them didn't count. But if you had to eliminate like some, one of the like the top, you have to eliminate one of the top 20 big vegetables.

20? Which bag? Yeah, top 20 big vegetables. Which, which one do you get rid of? Because I was thinking this in my head. This is just on my walk. I was thinking about this. I was walking by the Adams mansion, Wiger.

And where, where John Adams and John Quincy Adams live. Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da. Jesus Christ. And, and I, and I thought to myself, maybe I get rid of cucumbers. And then I realized a cucumber, I can't get rid of pickles. It's one of the most. No, you can't.

They're too important. You can't get rid of pickles. Well, there's also just cucumbers as in of themselves are delightful. I mean, just to have them in the salad, have them as a dip, a suno muno. How fun is that? There has to be a lower ranking vegetable than a cucumber.

Yeah, 100%. For me, it's bok choy. Oh, I like bok choy. Wow. I don't know. I don't know. I was gonna say. Forged. Traction. Okay, if we're gonna launch a vegetable into space,

so that we don't ever see it again. Yes. And also here's, here's another thing too, David, before you answer. Yeah. Everyone in the world is gonna know that you got rid of that vegetable. Oh boy. These, these are really high stakes.

Holy shit. You might get, you might get killed. Okay. Well, I believe in my choice. So I will say, no matter what happens, radishes. Wow. Unfortunately, unfortunately, I would have to kill you over that, I think. Oh my God.

Radishes are pretty good. Don't get me wrong, I love the crunch. Radishes, you know what? Well, what are you, when are you like really eating radishes? And you know what, how does that come up? This is gonna count in the top. I think this counts as one of the big vegetables because like, like, Nick,

you said watercress the other day, right? Yeah, but I think that is kind of a cop out. That's a cop out. Yeah. And Drop King said, fucking, did he say lima beans? That piece of shit. Yeah, I don't think lima beans really count. That's fucking bullshit.

Every vegetable has its place. I mean, I get, you know, and if you're talking big vegetables, I mean, you gotta have certain things you can't really live without. I mean, I can't get rid of spinach. I gotta have spinach. You can't get rid of carrots.

Gotta have onions. What's, what's bunny gonna chop on? Yeah, so it's, it's a difficult question. I mean, if I could get away with something like fennel, even though I like fennel, I feel like we could, I could get by without fennel. We could live in a world without fennel. I mean, we would. I'm fine with fennel.

Yeah. Let it up. It's tough. Yeah. I want fennel. I think that's a bad answer. I like fennel. The bread and butter pickles you're eating, I misread it. It's not spicy pickles. It's simply pickles.

Miss now, Howard. This is your favorite for idol? Simply pickles. You know, I, I don't know if I'm that like brand particular for some are obviously crunchier than others. I feel like Trader Joe's brand doesn't have a great pickle with a great crunch. It's always a bummer when Trader Joe's has like a bad thing. Like, you know what I mean?

I know, because in general, in general, I like love absolutely everything they do. So, but a Vlasik is like, come on. Are we beating a Vlasik? No. Let's get real. Yeah. Or if you go like fancier, maybe you do like a bubby's or something like one of those nice ones.

Also going to hand it to Vlasik underrated mascot, the nice stork man. The stork, we like that stork. Yeah. He's cool. He's great. Would you be parents without him? Certainly not.

We owe him everything. Would you, are you guys, because I know people have strong feelings about bread and butter pickles. Are you guys dill or bust or are you more open minded? Any, any type of pickle for me. I like a bread and butter pickle.

I like a. That's great to have sweet pickles either, you know, pre devices. Yeah. I do like dill a little bit more, but, but I, but I like bread and butter. I like all pickles. I'm with wigs.

On a burger to me, this is really good because it's like, yes, you know, I don't, I don't like my pickles. I don't like them as sweet. Like I like a, like a, like a, like I like a good vinegary pickle taste. These are definitely on the sweeter side.

A great, great, great midnight snack. Like that is taking a pickle spear. If you get a pickle spear, that's a great midnight snack to me. That counts big time. So butter pickles can kiss my butt. Wow. Wow.

I said it and I meant it. I hate them. And I love dill pickles. And I, and I love pickled things in general. Pickled okra. Are you guys on board for that? That's kind of a. I messed around with,

I haven't messed around with pickled okra. I have had pickled okra. I like it. You gotta look, you gotta look in one little section, like in California, they just have like one jar of it, you know.

David, I think you might be finishing this podcast from the duck house, my man. Yeah, you're just talking about the couch tonight, my man. No, I'm just going to make him watch me at this whole jar. Wow. Not again. Bread and butter brings up what I think

to go into what I think, my final midnight snack area. I was going to say nachos too, but nachos are a little heavy, just like more like tortilla chips with cheese sprinkled on in the microwave. Yeah, I think what you're saying, you're really illustrating a good point

that you don't want to have to like labor. And I think some of the days, even kind of pushing it as far as like labor. Yeah. But yeah, you might be like just melting cheese on chips. You might just be, yeah. That's a grilled cheese and even more simple than that. A PB and J, Wigs.

Sure. I can't go wrong there. That's a midnight snack to me. It's just not, it's not really a PB and J isn't really like count as a meal in my mind. It's not like a lunch. I couldn't eat a PB and J for lunch to be happy.

I need to eat like two or one. Oh, I could. Just one PB and J and be fine? Well, not just, not, I mean, like I don't ever just have a sandwich and call it Wigs for a Lunch, but like that can be my main item. I could like have a PB and J and like an apple

and some chips and that's a good lunch. Okay. Let's be a good show. Okay. Instead of like wife swap, it's like meal swap. And so like you swap food and like fridges with like another person

and you eat exactly what they would eat in a day. I love it. That's so fun. That's a great idea. So like you could swap with like the rock and have like one of his like, you know, his two, two 30 AM protein shake. Liquid chickens.

Liquid chicken, you know, one of those. And just like, I'll see if you survive. And then he has to eat your food. Yeah. Well, he has to eat off a table. Yeah. He's eating off a table with a spatula. Scraping women to his gob.

It would be funny if rock, the rock and I meal switched and at the end of the day, we were both dead. Just the shock to both of your systems. This is a cute thing on the pickle jar. I just noticed it says, cucumber and vine. It has like a street intersection

and one of the street names is cucumber and one of the street names is vine. Like the famous street vine. Vine. Wow. Yeah. So wait, so in this, so in this world. So correct me if I'm wrong.

In this world, Hollywood would be cucumber? Yes. Yes. So the Hollywood sign would say cucumber. It would say cucumber wood. Yeah. Yeah. Well, cucumber, yeah.

Woodland. Cucumberland. Cucumberland. Yeah. Cucumberwoodland. You know what? That's a Hollywood I'd rather live in, to be honest with you.

I agree. Amen. Wow. Well, hey, on that note, Marissa Pinson, Dave Nier. Thank you guys for coming back. We got to have you both on our main episodes real soon. I don't know how long it had been since we had you on.

Yeah, it's been too long. It's been too long. I know, it's been so long. Why are you so great? We got to figure it out. So what kind, I love being on the doubles because my mom can't listen to these. She doesn't know how to find them.

She listens to all the main lines. Her response is always so tepid. It's like, yeah, I heard it. Yeah. I was like, yeah, that's it? That is the response to most of our episodes anyway. So I get that from my parents and I host the show. So it is.

Mitch, I know that your mom is kind of involved in the food and stuff now. Does she listen to the show? Does she want to know what you're doing in the basement? Like she lets me go and like, you know, cause she knows that I'm gonna, you know, she knows that there's going to be some boner talk and... Right.

So she lets me go down and do my own thing. But what I didn't say the other day is that we went and got Denny's for one of the Raphkrabah episodes. And she, when we were going into Denny's, she put on a mask and it was an oven fries mask, and I was like, oh, oven fries. I was like, hey, oven fries. And then afterwards she took off the mask.

And she was like, oh, it says oven fries on the mask. And I was like, yeah. And she's like, I thought you were just, I thought you just said oven. And I was like, what did you think I was doing? What it, what? She's just so used to you just like spouting out that she just like smiles politely and goes about her life.

She's used to me just saying like food that I like a lot. Hey, come on. She's peace. Hey, she's pizza, huh? Where did she find it? Like she didn't. Yeah. She bought every Doughboy's mask on T-Public or whatever.

What are we on? Are we on T-Public? Yeah, we're on T-Public. All right, good. She bought like every Doughboy's mask on T-Public. That's very sweet, very small. Yeah, it was very nice. But she doesn't listen to the,

I hope she doesn't listen to the show. Though I did hear her. So what was she listening to the other day? She was watching an old birthday boy sketch. Her friend had sent, maybe it was September Santa. I like woke up at 8 a.m. and I heard September Santa, the sketch I did on birthday boys playing in her room. David was watching that the other day.

I was watching that. It was a fun sketch. It was on Instagram. Maybe somebody posted it. Yes, maybe the Doughboys, I think, sorry, the birthday boys. Maybe David and your mom are on the same like text thread or something.

You only chat. David, are you kissing Mitch's mom on the mouth? It's not weird. Why is everyone thinking it's weird that I kissed Mitch's mom on the lips for 10 seconds? Anybody can kiss anybody's mom and it's not weird. The takeaway, I hope everyone takes that away. Kiss everyone's mom.

I confronted her about it and I was like, are you watching September Santa? She's like, Kathy Wood sent it to me. And I was like, and Kathy Wood, great lady. And I was like, but I was like, but that was on the birthday boys show. And she's like, oh, I don't think I ever saw it. I was like, I guess she didn't watch the show or something.

She had never seen September Santa. I was kind of offended by it. She must be so happy you're in a progressive commercial because that's like something that she can relate to, show her friends. David and I are both in the progressive family. We're both in a progressive commercial. That's amazing.

And I'm sure you know, David, that it's bigger than anything else you could ever do in Hollywood. Oh, absolutely. His parents were so like starstruck on his behalf about meeting Flo, like. Yeah. Wow.

My auntie Pat texted me, congratulations on the progressive commercial. Then two returns and then did you meet Flo? That's what she said. Parents are like so obsessed with Flo. They love Flo. That's what Flo said to me. She was like, I was like, can I get your picture?

My parents love you. I guess that's kind of mean to say. And I love you too, Flo. Yeah. But she was like, parents are obsessed with me. That the boomer generation loves Flo and she knows it. She knows, yes, there is a lot of love towards Flo, but we don't know crossover with Flo in my thing.

But maybe we'll cross over. Stephanie Courtney, very talented actor, portrays Flo. Yeah, great gig. Marissa, Dave, anything you'd like to plug? You know, everybody just take care of your mental health. There you go. I agree with that. Try to find an affordable option for therapy

if you need it and just get outside, go for a walk. You really are, if you're like, oh, I can handle it. You can't handle it. Talk to someone, you have to. I feel like you're talking to me and Wagga right now. Oh. That's this week's Doe Boys Double, bye. On the next Doe Boys Double,

hey, baby, I hear the blues of Colin toss salads and scrambled egg nog. Big Grande's Dan Lippert joins to watch the pilot of Frasier and discuss that Christmas beverage known as nog. It's a holiday pilot program and it's only at patreon.com slash Doe Boys. That was a hate gum podcast.