Drama Queens - 23 Questions with Barbara Alyn Woods

Episode Date: September 25, 2023

Barbara faces the Drama Queen’s 23 (and then some) intimate questions. She reveals her perfect happiness, greatest fear, the weirdest thing she keeps by her bed and what she has hidden on her body 24/7! Plus, having just returned from a month long road trip with her girls, Barbara has plenty she needs to get off her chest!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. It may look different, but native culture is alive. My name is Nicole Garcia, and on Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we aim to explore that culture. Somewhere along the way, it turned into this full-fledged award-winning comic shop. That's Dr. Lee Francis IV, who opened the first Native comic bookshop. Explore his story along with many other native stories on the show, Burn Sage, Burn Bridges. Listen to Burn Sage Burn Bridges. Listen to Burn Sage Burn Bridges on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

First of all, you don't know me. We're all about that high school drama girl, drama girl, all about them high school queens. We'll take you for a ride in our comic girl. Drama girl. Cheering for the right team. Drama queens, drama queens, smart girl, rough girl, fashion but you'll tough girl. You could sit with us, girl. Drama queen, drama queens, drama queens, drama queens, drama queens, drama queens.

Okay, so we're going to have kind of a chaotic show for you because I'm getting furniture delivered right in the middle of this episode. I tried so hard to make sure that this furniture delivery didn't happen while we were recording. But sometimes the universe just wants to add a little spice. Yeah, to which you. Things never quite work at. Plus, you got people yelling outside your window. The tree trimmers are mad at each other. You guys, we, I just got an office for the first time since I worked at every.

MTV, like an adult office, and it has been nothing but chaos. So bear with us as I put this place together. Meanwhile, we also have a wild card with us today for 23 questions. I'm very excited, aren't you? I'm so stoked. I always love when we get to talk to Barbara. Barbara Allen Woods, ladies and gentlemen. She's so good looking.

Barbara with the good light. Yes. And the green kitchen. I don't notice, Joy. I love it. You're home. You never are home. You're always on vacation.

I just got here. You are. You're always off with your girls somewhere. Fabulous. We just drove 7,200 miles. What? You're such a fun, mom. Well, I did it for me, too.

You don't get a chance to do that. So with the strike, as soon as we heard about the strike, we hit the road. Was it all the girls in you? So Emily would meet up with us from time to time because that's what Ellen does. She can fly there to see us. And then Natalie and her boyfriend did the same thing. But then we kind of like we would merge and then separate and then get back together. And Allie was with me the whole time.

Oh, that's so fun. We drove. We saw everybody. it was a month and it was amazing. What a great idea. What was your route? Where did you guys go? And we didn't have a schedule.

We just decided where we wanted to go. We would go. No way. We ended up. We were in Wilmington for a while. And it was the first time I'd been in Wilmington where I didn't have to be there. Yes. There was, you know, I was able to hang out with my friends.

I wasn't busy. I didn't have a schedule. And it was amazing. Well, you stayed somewhere cool. You sent us the link for this awesome new place, right? Guys have to know about this because she wants to put up all of us. I mean, if she could have the One Tree Hill connection, it was so great because it's right on the river. And there are these like condos, these two-bedroom condos that overlook the river and they're brand new.

I know where this is. They're houseboats, babe. Wait, their houseboats? Oh, wait, I was thinking there's condos, like, on the down-to-down. I mean, you don't, they don't move, but they rock a little bit. Oh, my gosh. It's like Vancouver. Yeah.

I love to do that. That's so fun. Please, if you're heading that way, let me know and I'll hook you up. Oh, my God. Listen, for anybody that loves the river court and just really wants to spend some time on the Cape Fear River, that's the perfect place to hang out. Yeah. It's amazing.

And the views and their little patios and, you, you can see fish fly. It's just like unbelievable. I loved it. I love it. So we've got 23 questions that we've been asking everyone since we're all on strike and we are standing in solidarity and we don't want to talk about the job we necessarily did together, but we want to know everything about you. So I hope you're prepared to tell us all your secrets today. Joy, kick it off. Okay, Barbara, what is your idea of perfect happiness? Oh, being perfect happiness for me is being in the same country, same state, same room, doing the same thing with all three of my girls at the same time.

And that rarely happens. And right now, my life, that's happening. So I am very, very content. I love that they want to hang out with you, Barbara. Like, that is such a goal to have your adult children want to hang out with you. you if they just feel guilty and i don't feel guilty no no but that's the great thing about kids getting older and i was so afraid of that because i i had such a bond with my kids when they were younger but as they get older it's just a whole different thing they become your friend

and that sounds so cliche but they really do you know it's yeah i don't know if it is cliche barbara because i have so many people in my life who and i'm sure you encountered this too when the girls were young or like, oh, just wait until she's a teenager. It's all going to go in the pooper. And I got to say, it's not the truth. It's not always the case. And actually, watching you raise your daughters so far ahead of me raising Maria really gave me a lot of hope and inspiration that, like, it's going to be okay. Like, I actually can still be friends with her. We're not destined to hate each other for the next 10 years. No. And not to say I didn't have, we did have a few teenage moments. Of course. A few. But.

general and then it all just comes around and seriously when they get into their 20s they become your best friend and alley has never gone through any teenage moments i always like the most solid kid like it's just yeah it's okay you can do some things once she doesn't she's just a really good kid are you trying to get her to rebel at this point you're like hey i'm not paying attention right now you could sneak out of that house. I never rebelled and she's a little bit of a mini-me so maybe that's why. So I don't know.

She'll do it later. She'll get into like some weird stuff in her 30s and you'll be like, what is this about? I'm so old by then I won't care. Yeah, I did it. Yeah, she's entertainment. Okay. So then that leads us to our second question,

which is a total 180. What is your greatest fear? Don't do Okay, I want to say, you know, sharks, that's boring. My greatest fear is to be isolated in a place where I know I can't get out without my chapstick. What? You do have sumptuous lips.

I completely, like, and if I can't get my coffee in the morning, I know that, like, you know, we'll go camping. Well, how am I going to have my coffee morning? Wait, wait, Barbara, you are like, you've done so many amazing projects. The last one, one of the ones that you did was with, like, was a horror movie with like a doll. Like, what? Are you talking about chapstick? No, situational life moments.

Like, oh, here. Oh, my God. She just pulled chapstick out of her boobs. And my kids know that if they need chapstick and we're out in public somewhere, they'll just reach in my cleavage and get it because it's always there. Barbara, I could not have scripted that better. That was a magical revelation right there. It was my favorite Barbara secret ever.

How long have you been doing that? How long has that been your little chapstick pocket? For a very long time. And it's always kind of warm now. It is. It kind of like gets it kind of soft. It's perfect. Oh my God.

Listen, I'm doing it. You know how they say, you know, but don't start chapstick because you'll get addicted. Well, I'm there. Do you have a brand? What's your brand? Well, because I was using chapstick and my girl said, oh, I don't use chapstick because that's really addicting. So I'm trying this little chapstick thing called love. Okay.

And it has a nice thing. Listen, of all the vices in the world, that one seems manageable. Okay. That's good for you. That's my biggest fear. All right. What about this? If you could be the best in the world at something, anything, anything at all, what would it be?

Oh, I would love to be the best dancer in the world. And let me tell you, I am a little bit self-conscious about suburban housewife dancing. And, you know, I'm from Chicago where actors are triple threats. And if you want an actor, you take voice and you take dance. and if you're not a triple threat like good luck and I kept up with the voice and I'm okay

but I always knew that I wasn't going to be the best at dancing and so it was a little discouraging and I didn't keep up with it the way I should have and I've always been a little self-conscious I have my little stripper moves

that I can do but when I come weren't you in the Demi Moore movie were you in? I can do my stripper moves I mean I was a cheerleader I can do choreographed moves but when it comes to like

let's get on the dance floor and dance like oh god really and so if I could be the best dancer in the world or not even have to worry about it that would be amazing I feel like we've seen you dance

and I think it's great you got our vote I concur thank you I love it okay hold on what's our next question it is oh god Barbara come on

what is the weirdest item that you keep by your bed. I'm sorry. I have, I'm a very high-maintenance sleeper. I have a lot of things by my bed, but probably the weirdest is most people have white noise machines. I have a brown noise machine.

What is that? Yeah, I've heard of this. Ever heard of brown noise? It's deeper, it's more base. and it feels like you're in the womb. Yeah. What? It's like a lulling like,

to the moon. Yeah. And it's constant. It has to be constant because some noise machines have a break and so like every so often you'll hear like a click. It has to be constant.

And so I have a brown noise machine and it travels with me everywhere I go and I have not found an app on my phone that is the same as this one machine that I have. how did you even learn about brown noise um i mean i was always into white noise i like something about so i'm not distracted i always like a white noise okay i always wished it was lower in my head i was like oh i just wish the tone was lower looking into it and sure enough there's pink noise and brown uh what else i don't know i know pink and brown's the best check it out okay i'm sold

I love this. You're learning so much. Honestly, like, I'm going to be on Amazon all night tonight. I'm just like, well, I guess I need the 10-foot skeleton and I need the brown noise. I'll tell you each one to buy. If you're going to purchase one, I'll let you know which one you can get on Amazon for sure. I don't know you are high-maintened sleeper. I am too.

There's a lot of things I'm very particular about. It's, yeah, when I sleep. Like what? Give me one. Well, it has to be absolutely dark. I can't deal with things that are glowing, like a room with the blue, you know, the plugs that glow blue or, you know, and the television can't have a little light on, like, nothing. It'll keep me awake. Yeah.

The temperature is a big deal. I really can't sleep if it's any warmer than 69, 68, 69. Mine is me. Yeah. Yep. And, I mean, you could go much colder. Let's do it. It'd be great.

And also, like, people who want to sleep too close, I can't. It's like, get away from me. Yes, I want my space. And I need a pillow between my knees. You do, do? Interesting. This is all so interesting to me. There's like a whole subculture I'm learning.

Sleep culture. Yeah, of like, I don't want to say particular sleepers, but like sensitive sleepers. You could open up a whole hotel that caters just to sensitive sleepers. Do it. You know, you know, when people, you know, just are at a party and they say, well, just stay over, you know, just stay. I can't do it because I still have my stuff with me. Yeah, you need your things.

I'm, I'm, it's really tough. And when we were on the road for those 7,200 miles, I had all of my stuff. You brought in a bag with your brown noise and your knee pillow every night. All essential, yes. I like that. We'll talk shop some more later. Right now, I want to know, okay, what is, what is, what? living person do you most admire?

My mom. That's awesome. And once again, a little cliche, but it's true. I mean, she gave up her whole life for her kids, and that's how I learned to be a mom, and that's how I learned about holidays and how to stay young. And, I mean, I owe my whole life to her. So I'm for sure. Well, that's, I like that you said she stayed young.

She taught you how to stay young. As we grow up, man, that is a whole skill that no one talks to you about. Just like staying young and you've always stayed like very young, Barbara, you're playful. I mean, it's up here for sure. And so is my mom. It may look different, but native culture is very alive. My name is Nicole Garcia and on Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we aim to explore that culture. It was a huge honor to become a television writer.

because it does feel oddly, like, very traditional. It feels like Bob Dylan going electric, that this is something we've been doing for hundreds of years. You carry with you a sense of purpose and confidence. That's Sierra Taylor Ornellis, who with Rutherford Falls became the first native showrunner in television history. On the podcast, Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we explore her story, along with other native stories,

such as the creation of the first Native Comic-Con or the importance of reservation basketball. Every day, native people are striving to keep traditions alive while navigating the modern world, influencing and bringing our culture into the mainstream. Listen to Burn Sageburn Bridges on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. All right, next question. What is your current state of mind? Where's your head at right now?

complete utter contentment talking to you guys. I always feel so happy and safe talking to you guys and miss you so much. And I'm just really, really always happy to be doing this with you. You're so consistent too, Barbara. I feel like every time I see you, you're just a steady, steady person. Oh, on the outside. But what is... That's so rare in our history.

That's true. so then what in that case is your greatest extravagance um Starbucks oh talk about high maintenance my bronze ice vanilla latte every single morning and if I don't have it I know if I know I can't get it in the morning I will get it the night before and put it in the fridge and you just get it with no ice because then you can just add the ice in the morning but seriously when I'm looking for a hotel or an apartment when we're on location, I make sure that it's near a coffee shop. And it can't be the coffee that I make myself. It has to be, you know,

going out and getting it. There's something about this that I need. It's so stupid because coffee just keep getting more expensive. Yes. It's, I consider this an extravagance. I've been doing it a long time. That's good. So chapstick, brown noise, and your fancy Starbucks coffees. I mean, yeah. I mean, 365 days a year times that's extravagant. That's pretty low maintenance, high maintenance, Barbara. Okay.

Good. Okay. What do you most value in your friends? What qualities? I think the common denominator with all of my best friends are that they're very non-judgmental people, accepting of everybody and especially accepting of me, unconditional love. And, oh, tear ducts open. And they just accept me for who I am.

And that allows me to be who I am around them. And as I get older, I think easy goes a long way and I don't want to have to work when I'm with people. and yeah they're just I feel the unconditional love and I have a lot of friends I have a few really good friends and I would say that that's that's kind of like yeah the common denominator they're just accepting human beings it's awesome it's so nice especially because like I don't know I was explaining to somebody the other day that there's a difference between like Hillary Burton the person and Hillary Burton the product, because there's very much like a thing

that has been bought and sold since I was 18 years old since you guys started working. And so when you have people that know the thing behind the product and they're really kind of like sensitive to it, they're like, yeah, get messy.

You can go dark here. No, the people who can, you don't care if your house is a mess. You don't care if they're taking the shower three days. Like those people, you know, you know, if I've done something wrong, I want those people I can come as like, hey, I've done this terrible thing. Oh, we love you anyway. They're going to grab a shovel. Where do we bury it? Exactly. Yeah. Exactly.

Mm-hmm. We're just going to bury all the bodies together. We need that. So, all right, here we go. Well, then, on what occasion do you, if you lie? She does. She lies. On what occasion do you lie. Well, I'm so afraid to say this. Like, whisper it. Every kids growing up, every Christmas, every Easter, every time they lost a tooth, I lied. I see. Just in case anyone's watching this.

Yeah. Yeah. I hear about it to this day. They're mad about it? Emily is traumatized by the fact. that I lied to her. No. You could have just told me the truth.

We tell, you know, we tell the truth about these things. Wow. Yeah. I see what you're saying. I am in that boat right now, Barbara. Okay. Then let's not talk about it. And it's, it's, you don't know whether you're being duped.

I know. Like, I don't know if I'm being duped by my 13-year-old or. He duped. He duped. because when it's gone, it's so sad. I know. I listen, I'll hold on till they're 40 and I don't care. Yes. Yes. It's just so much fun. And even to this day, Emily, especially for some reason, won't let me talk about it. Yeah, don't. No, even now. God. Wow. I love that kid. I love that she's holding your feet to the fire.

Don't see that. That makes me so comfortable. Yeah. I'm called for. Nobody hears this segment, Hillary. no one hears this part of the I'm not going to tell them okay listen I'm not telling them this between us and a couple 100,000 people but they're not going to tell the girls either um okay so we know you're going to continue doing that forever um but what is one thing you will never do again I will never sell my house with dishonest lawyer ever again and you if you ever have to sell a house, make sure you know this person's background before you do. And I will fill you guys in.

Yeah. But that's the best advice I could ever give you. It's already such an emotional time when you sell a house. It's just, it's trauma no matter what you do, because moving is hard and the financial risks are scary. And so when you have someone that's being predatory in that situation, awful after the fact after she bought the house what yeah wow yeah wait this is the lawyer that you used to sell a house or the person that bought happens to be a lawyer oh oh my gosh boo his oh bad karma her way sent sent don't i'm uh yeah i'll feel you guys it's a big deal though

it's hard to know it's you go into business with people in various ways and it's hard to know it's just hard to know i've had i've definitely run into situations where people just rip you off and they you think they're one thing and they turn out to be something else it's awful never occurred to me but it's a lesson learned and i will teach that to everybody just you know look into somebody's background before you like you said yeah i mean if you want to know some like sneaky things you could do, like pour salt in their front yard and grass won't grow. I will put it out. I'm looking for all of those ideas.

Thank you very much. We find Barbara in a cat suit in the middle of the night in their yard. I'm just like dumping a huge bag of rock salt. Yeah, yeah. I like this plan. Okay. It's so good. All right.

What's the strangest purchase you've ever made or almost made? Oh. How is that? Yeah, there we go. There we go. You have to describe it for our listeners. Can you see him? And guess what's the name is?

And I did not name him. My kids did. His name is Antoine. She's got a big old, big old, huge skeleton in the house. Like Antoine, but his name is Antoine. He's handsome. He tried to get him three years in a row. He's from Home Depot.

Oh, yeah. Natalie, who's my big Halloween fan, well, we all are, but her especially. Three years ago, he came out, and we couldn't get him because he sold out immediately. I'd get him the next year sold out, like, I don't know, like Easter time was sold out. And then this year, she said, I'm getting him this year. It was a big night. We drove her little Toyota to see if we could get him, and then we couldn't fit him in the car, and we had to take body parts.

His body by piece. Like the little trips home piece by piece because we couldn't fit him in the car. He's big. 12 feet high. Yeah. It's like Gulliver's Travels. Like you guys are the little,

what are they called? The Lilliputians carrying this big, huge, giant body. Hilarious. I like that. You might leave him there you around. I'm not sure. But where are you going to put him the whole recipe? You're going to have to put Christmas decorations on him at some point.

a tree to replace him, but he comes apart. So we'll everybody will just live with some bones. Yeah, it's you and all the goth girls from my high school that have the 12 foot skeleton from homeby's boat. I'm

so proud of you. You're part of a very elite squad of goth girls. Oh, gosh. That's proud of you. I'll meet your goth girlfriends. Not even a little bit surprised though. You always had the best costumes at our Halloween party. Like, you would show

yeah we have so many if you guys ever need to borrow costumes please because good to know yes okay well this question now we're going to get fancy let's get serious ladies uh who are your favorite writers hmm so i was a theater major and i was a bit of a theater snob in college um so When you say writers, I mean, I think immediately I think authors, but I was, I was a theater snob, so I was always into playwrights, you know, I was really into Pinter, Tennessee Williams, all the classical playwrights. But I kind of feel like when you say writers, I want to shout out the amazing WGA writers who don't get enough recognition and support. and attention. And I know you guys through this little project that we did together for nine years, some of these amazing writers, I feel like they didn't get enough attention.

And I am binging this little project that we did right now with my 16-year-old daughter. And I am constantly crying and so amazed by one of my favorite episodes, Jennifer Cecil wrote. yeah um super talented and also one of my favorite writers uh stacy rukeiser yeah and michel furtby goodman and i have to say this was not a project we did together but david e kelly is one of my favorite writers oh my gosh yeah i worked with years and years and years ago and he's so loyal to his actors and then natalie ended up working with him and he's so brilliant and he infuses humor to everything he writes, and he's a little bit off, and I've always been a fan of his, and I hope I get to work with him again, but he's amazing. So let's shout out these WGA,

amazing, talented writers. That's such a good answer. They literally are therapists for the entire country. They're the people who set our collective tone about like, hey, what are we going to discuss in our national discourse? What feels good? What feels bad? You know, They're important. Of course, and it begins up there with them. And so, yes. Love them. Love them.

What's your greatest regret? You don't seem like someone who has regrets, but maybe you do. I regret getting addicted to chapstick. Yes, slippery slope. I should have listened to my mother. Speaking of my mother, I wish, we're getting so deep but I regret I had a great grandmother

who lived to be almost 100 she just missed 100 she was 99 and I wish and I know I was really young but I wish that I had spent more time just talking having deep conversations with her and my grandmother who I loved and saw all the time and you know she would give me money and I would hug her and we would spend time together

but I'm talking about deep deep conversations the older generation how much you can learn and trust from the older generation, I just wish I had spent more time with my relatives who could have taught me so much. Yeah. I am teaching that to my girls. Call grandma, talk to her. Don't just say hi.

Don't have small talk. Ask her about, oh, can I tell you what I just did? Yes. This is so exciting. So my dad is not around anymore. My mother is. they spent their honeymoon in a hotel in Chicago, how many years ago? So it was 1930. I don't know. I would have been there like their 65th anniversary or something. They just had their

anniversary. And we were going through Chicago. And so my girls and I spent the night at the Drake Hotel in Chicago. And I told the owners of the Drake that we were going to be doing this. And they were thrilled. So I asked my mom about it and she took out her scrapbooks and in her scrapbook she had her stay at the Drake Hotel, which included matchbooks, a little, like a shoe cleaner and the receipt for the hotel. $14.40. Hi, sis. They're a honeymoon. This is where they spent her honeymoon. And we went around and took pictures and it was just it was amazing um that's cool it was amazing i think i saw one of your girls post all these like beautiful hotel pictures it's like a beautiful classic hotel right yes yes and when i

when i posted it as well and then i started getting a you know a lot of people chiming in like that's where my parents spent their honeymoon and i had my wedding there and it was so great so that's what i'm talking about knowing your parents, knowing your grandparents, knowing, like, really connecting to the past. Yeah. It makes a big difference. Barbara, that is such a good answer. Okay, talk to me about something that you really dislike.

Okay. I have something called myzophonia. Yes. So you don't have this joy. I think I, Paul has it for sure, but I have a very, I think I have a very small, I think I have a very small, because there are moments that I'm like, I can't function. But it starts small and it gets to be worse as you live life.

But there are certain sounds. And I'm not talking about nails in a chalkboard, whatever I can take that. I'm not talking about gum chewing. I can handle that. I'm talking about little specific things that maybe nobody else would notice. And my kids know the look. Yeah, yeah, you're trapped in your body.

anything plastic like a plastic water bottle crunching it's a neurological reaction that i have that i seriously could kill something like it's so bad danger and self-diagnosed no one's ever told me i had this but i looked it up and i definitely have this what did we do before the internet this is why so many women thought they were crazy yeah for the internet because they felt like they were alone in these situations and now that we can connect god bless i love what do you have one trigger noise joy i it's more in it's repetitive sounds so it's a major like i could listen to a water bottle get crinkled but if there's some small repetitive uh whether it's a beep i cannot have ticking clocks anywhere in the in the home you hear this yes

Like, I can manage that for about 20 seconds and then it would start to irritate me, but then if it was continual and random, like, if it's on a, if it's on a meter, I can last longer, but random clicks. And the funny thing is I usually don't notice it until my body is reacting. And I'm like, what is happening to me? And then all of a sudden I can, it's like a, like a bat signal. And I just zero in on the sound. And I'm like, get it.

you have it you have it oh my god what's the fix like is it just your body producing cortisol or like adrenaline i don't know i think it's therapy i think you would have to you know i think they would probably immerse you in this sound until you got over it no no that's a war crime barbara sure you will maybe you guys are like deficient in your magnesium maybe you're like magnesium or i took i went to a movie with paul once and he was was the person behind me was crinkling a candy wrapper. And it took me a second. He was on it right away. He just kept looking over his shoulder and shuffling in his seat. I was like, what is your deal? He was like the candy wrapper. And as soon as he said it, then I was like, oh, no.

I have the look down to like on an airplane. I have the look. I'll do the bed until they get it. I'll get it. Yeah. The pretty lady's getting agitated over there. Settle down, folks. Well, okay, so, so, misophonia, notwithstanding. It may look different, but native culture is very alive. My name is Nicole Garcia, and on Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we aim to explore that culture. It was a huge honor to become a television writer because it does feel oddly, like, very traditional. It feels like Bob Dylan going electric, that this is something we've been doing for a hundred of years. you carry with you a sense of purpose and confidence.

That's Sierra Taylor Ornelis, who with Rutherford Falls became the first native showrunner in television history. On the podcast, Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we explore her story, along with other Native stories, such as the creation of the first Native Comic-Con or the importance of reservation basketball. Every day, Native people are striving to keep traditions alive while navigating the modern world,

influencing and bringing our culture into the mainstream. Listen to Burn Sage Burn Bridges on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Who or what is the greatest love of your life? Who accepts this about you? Natalie, Emily, Olivia. But I do need to do a little shout out to the first love of my life. who was Paul Weeks, my high school boyfriend.

Ooh, hi, Paul. He went away to college. He was two years older than me, which was, you know, pretty extreme back in the day. But we would write each other letters twice a day. What? And if we didn't receive two letters in the mail. And so like maybe on Tuesday we might not because there was no mail on Sunday. So, you know, anyway, we had it figured out.

But we would get two letters a day. and I still have all of these letters in bags saved, of course. And he taught me about love and romance and respect. And we're still good friends. Everything after that, I mean, he set the standard. And I think it's so important, especially as my daughters are dating, like, the first one is so important. And I find myself comparing with, and I told him that. like this is take it as a compliment like everybody was compared to you because it was really

perfect in high school it was perfect that does sound dreamy i don't know if i ever liked anyone enough to write two letters a day though barbara like that's a big deal i was in love man and that's why i also take their relationships very seriously when some people say oh they'll get you know she's 16 no it's real it's so real feelings are real yeah so real because I know mine were because at my age I can still look back and say no it was real oh for sure for sure it's embarrassing sometimes but very real all right so then when and where were you happiest I think I might have been the happiest I ever was and hopefully there will be more happiness in the future I'm not saying I will never be this happy again but when I

living in Wilmington had three little girls two and then three I had the best friends I was working on a project that I loved so much and I think it was the perfect yin and yang where I could be a mom I could work I could go back to being a mom I could go back to work I could bring my kids to my work and it was just the perfect balance um and on top of that I wasn't working five days a week. I was working maybe three days a week. And I love, you know, being a mom to little kids and living on the beach. And it was just, it was perfection. It's nice when you can know in the moment. Like, I always felt like you, you exuded that happiness in the moment, right? And you made parenting seem like a blast, you know? It was never like, truly, oh, how? I'm

I don't know my lines because I was up all night with the kids. You know, like you never, ever played that card. You were just like, everything is fun. But you guys, too, you guys are exactly like that. Girl. Oh, thanks. We learned from the best. Oh, well.

You trained us. It was already in your blood. So, okay, here's the next question, which is sort of like the earlier one, but it's slightly different. This one is which talent would you? most like to have. So you may not be the best in the world at it, but it's just something that you really, yes, go. I wish that I would have the nerve and be good at being a stand-up comic. Yes. Barbara, you could, though. Oh, my goodness. I could never. I could totally see that. I respect comedians so much. I respect improv actors. I could never. I could never. I could never.

I would never. I couldn't be myself and be funny. I could be a character and be funny, but I couldn't be myself. But they're all being characters too. Like everyone, when they're doing stand-up is like playing a version of it.

I'm doing stand-up. You know, it's still, like I would have to create a persona and go on the road as somebody else. I could never do it as myself. I mean, that's also a sexy idea. It's a great option. Just create a whole new person.

Oh, my God. I love that. Yeah. You know, married before I had kids, I used to go to the laugh factory in the improv, unsensible by myself, and just watch stand-up. I really respect it. And, you know, some of those stand-ups are not really happy people. It's kind of what sounds about those when you actually meet them. They're very serious about their comedy. But I think if I could be really good at something and I could just

like get the gene immediately, I wish I could be good at stand-up. I think that this is, is a feasible future, for sure. I think if you start just keeping a notebook of the shit that you think is funny, having a comedian that comes at it from a lighthearted approach and just like everything is fun, like Deb is so funny, not because the words on the paper were funny, but because you're funny.

Agreed. OK, well, if I can have a writer, if I can have somebody write the comedy for me, then maybe. I need something like giving me a baseline, and then I can go from there. I can add funny to it. You need a writing partner? Yeah.

That's possible. We're going to, this is happening. Done. I want to see it. Dreams are happening here on drama queens. Okay. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? Don't even have to think twice about this.

I would stop worrying about everything. I worry. I worry. I worry. I do keep a pad and pen. to my bed. In the middle of the night, I wake up. I have a thought. I can't just, I just can't drop it. I have to write it down, get it out of my brain. Like my worry notes. And if I don't have anything to worry about, I will worry about your problems and your problems. My kids' problems

and my mom's problems. Like, I cannot stop caring so much. And my daughter, Natalie, always says, just don't care so much. Yeah. Like, easy for you to say, just don't care. Don't care. You just can't turn it off. I can't turn it off. I worry about it. This also might be a magnesium deficiency symptom. Oh, can you imagine if magnesium just solved all of my problems? No more lives of pneumonia, no more worrying, no more tapstitch.

Yesterday, my best friend gave me like mushroom tea instead of coffee because she was like you're worked up and you don't need caffeine. You need like these other things. to be honest, I did feel calmer and less worked up. It's just brain chemistry, right? Yeah, a lot of it. Yeah. All right.

We're shipping you some magnesium. Gumbies. Magnesium and mushrooms. Yeah. Drugs. We've got this. Barbara, what do you consider to be your greatest achievement? Oh, my kids.

Yeah. Blah, blah, blah. Like, obviously. blah, blah, blah. That's legitimate. I just do the answer to all my questions. But without a doubt, you know, it would be on my tombstone. This is my, the thing that I will leave to the world, my children. Nothing else even comes close.

That's awesome. I love that they feel the same way about you. Because, you know, like, I'm friendly with your daughters. I talk to them behind your back. and I as a parent know like there's going to come a time where it's going to be probably pretty one-sided where my kid cares more about their friends than they do about their dorky old mom the idea that you have raised these three kids in a brutal industry and they are as solid as they are and as talented and like well-respected and well-behaved

and, like, you know, they're just, they're so good, Barbara, in an environment that can oftentimes foster bad behavior. Yeah. And that is you, babe. And that you weren't so scary doing it, but they still think you're like, oh, that's crazy. I think I had tunnel vision when it came, you know, to raising them, which is why it was great to be working at the same time because it sort of forced me not to have tunnel vision. Yeah.

You know, after a project that we worked on together was over, I had more tunnel vision, which sort of, you know, I didn't see my friends as often as I would have liked. I didn't pursue my career as much as I maybe should have. And I'm not positive the tunnel vision was the right way to go, but when I look at the way they are now, it's sort of, you know, gives me some sort of verification that, yeah, it's good, it's good the way it worked out. How is dealing with other stage moms? Like, is my kids express interest in working? I'm like, oh, I don't know if I could do it. No, and I will kill anybody who ever calls me that because I want to be the opposite of that. Yeah, you're not a stage mom at all.

At the local little performing arts center, I'm a stage mom. I'm in there just like, what is this costume? I'll do the hair and makeup. It's one thing because you know, I mean, you know better than everyone else. I just like, yeah, no, I've had some experience with them, and I just stay away. We stay away as much as we can do. You have a code word, safe word. Antelope.

Antelope at 3 o'clock. It may look different, but native culture is very alive. My name is Nicole Garcia, and on Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we aim to explore that culture. It was a huge honor to. become a television writer because it does feel oddly, like, very traditional. It feels like Bob Dylan going electric, that this is something we've been doing for a hundred of years. You carry with you a sense of purpose and confidence. That's Sierra Taylor Ornellis, who with Rutherford Falls became the first native showrunner in television history. On the podcast,

Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we explore her story, along with other native stories, such as the creation of the first Native Comic-Con or the importance of reservation back. basketball. Every day, native people are striving to keep traditions alive while navigating the modern world, influencing and bringing our culture into the mainstream. Listen to Burn Sageburn Bridges on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. All right, if you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what would you want that to be? would come back as one of my girls, dogs, dogs get treated like royalty around here. They have home-cooked meals. They sit on the couch, watch movies. We have like yoga time for

them and they listen to relaxing music. It's three of them. So they're all good friends. They always have their friends. You know, they go on vacation. they travel the world and I really do believe they get treated better than I do. Come back.

Blasphemy. One of their dogs. That would be so amazing to die and come back as a dog that they own and I could just like keep track of still be on top of it all.

Oh my God. There's a movie in this for sure. For sure. Yes. Right it. I love that. all right barbara do you have something in your life that's just so easy that you know this is where

i think i know the answer to this too but you just know this is where i belong i'm so good at this or this particular field or space or what i mean this space i my daughters and i put a lot into this house and it was a very symbolic thing for me because when i was very young i thought okay I want to be an actress. And if I can ever buy a house from being an actress, like, you know, with no other income, this would mean I'm done. That's what I, you know, I can die now. And I'm not saying I want to die now, but this is sort of that simple for me.

But the fact that we put a lot of our heart and time and energy into renovating it, and we actually knocked down walls and, you know, not just painted, but we did floors and countertops. now it just has our signature on it and it just has our, you know, blood and sweat and tears in it. And it just means so much more. And I've never done that with a house before. And it just, I highly recommend it. You know, you can YouTube it and you can really do anything. Everywhere I go, there's just like a little reminder of this thing that we created together. And this is my place now. I never want to leave. Oh, well, Barbara, that leads us like right into the next question, which is where would you most like to live?

Oh, here. But if not here, and I'm not one of those East Coast people who, like, I hate living in Los Angeles. I love living in Los Angeles. I love living. It's beautiful. I'm looking at a view right now. It's beautiful. I'm from Chicago. I miss it a lot. And I've just spent time there. And for the first time I realized I could live in Chicago again. And I actually, do miss the winters a little bit. Yeah. Change of seasons. And I still call Wilmington my home because for me, it really felt like home raising my kids there. So I would choose here because of my house, Chicago, if my kids are there or Wilmington, if my kids are there.

I mean, yeah, best of both worlds. Just get a vacation house in Wilmington that you can rent out. Yeah, get one of those boats. Yeah, get a boat. Houseboat. Yeah. I'm all for it. Airbnb and rent it out to people

like during conventions and yeah. So then the last question, which incidentally, I think we should move these around a little. I think we should end on a different question because it's a little bit of it's a little anticlimactic. But what is your most treasured possession?

Oh, this could be very climactic. I guess that's true. What is your most valued possession. Is it the skill? Antoine. Okay. I will try to make this not anti-climactic.

Like the thing that you would grab in a fire. Yeah. The first thing, I would grab, I'm a photo fanatic. And even these days where everyone has all their photos on their phone, I still print them and frame them and put them up.

And I have an attic full of boxes and boxes and boxes, of pictures and um you guys are actually hanging up in my closet i have like a frame photo of all of us and i would grab my photo albums um they're my most treasure possessions because it's like from my birth all the way to now and everything is just sort of you know accumulated in these little books and you know like on show soap operas where somebody has a memory and they'll go to the picture and they'll trace it with their hands and they'll think back and all of a sudden there's a flashback and then you come back and they're crying well I do that yeah I'm like remember this time and I and then I'll just like flip the pages and my finger will go to one

point to it and that's like I do that so my photo albums I would grab my photo albums they're my most treasure possessions when I was moving from house to house I made sure that those were put like in a separate storage so they were kept safe um was that anticlimactic i don't know not even no it's so true you know you want to see a picture go to your phone like it's not the same as having it there all the time well and also even though you could reprint things there are a lot of photos that were taken before we had phones and there i have lots of books and bins of those too and you do yeah i do absolutely i don't have them all in frames but yeah there are times when i just want go back and look and remember.

The best is when you find, like, writing on the back. You're like, oh, I forgot. I forgot I wrote this. That's right. And my parents with their photo album, it was my dad's handwriting, and he's not around anymore, and I know his handwriting. And just to see his handwriting makes you feel like he's really there. It's so great.

That connection to your family again. Yeah. Barbara, we have so many good memories with you. And so I'm so happy that you came on today. Yeah, thank you. Now everyone knows all of your deepest, darkest secrets, including the brown noise machine. You know what? Check in with me because I'm going to try the magnesium with mushrooms when I get off the...

And I'm going to let you know how it goes. Enjoy you do the same. I will. It can't hurt. And if we travel together, you know that we can room together because we can see... Absolutely. I love it. It's so great to see you always, Barbara.

Just love you. Yes, Sophia, my love. We will. She's having some wild adventure with her parents in Europe right now. And so she's doing the exact thing you've talked about all this episode, like really connecting with family. And we value that. Yeah.

Yeah. All right, baby, kiss those girls for us. We love you and them. Okay. Bye. Bye, Barbara. Hey, friends. Thank you for joining us.

Sorry, we didn't get to bring in soap on this one, but she'll be here. here soon and I'm so glad that you joined us with Barbara. She's such a class act and such an interesting person. Queen, man. We love Queen Barb. So we'll see you next time. Hey, thanks for listening. Don't forget to leave us a review. You can also follow us on Instagram at Drama Queen's OTH or email us at Drama Queens at iHeartRadio.com. See you next time. We're all about that high school drama girl, drama girl, all about them high school queens. We'll take you for a ride and our comic girl Chearing for the right team.

Drama queens, drama queens. Smart girl, rough girl, fashion but you'll tough girl. You could sit with us, girl. Drama queens, drama queens, drama queens, drama queens. It may look different, but native culture is alive. My name is Nicole Garcia and on Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we aim to explore that culture. Somewhere along the way, it turned into this full-fledged award-winning comic shop. That's Dr. Lee Francis IV, who opened the first native comic bookshop.

Explore his story along with many other native stories on the show, Burn Sage Burn Bridges. Listen to Burn Sage Burn Bridges on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an IHeart podcast.