Drama Queens - Work in Progress: Morgan Wade

Episode Date: September 19, 2024

Rising country music artist Morgan Wade may seem like an overnight success, but it took a lot of hustle and hard work to get to where she is now. The singer-songwriter chats with Sophia about being young and hungry to make it, and putting everything she had into kick-starting her career from booking her own shows, creating her own merch, and even building her own website! She reveals why her collaboration with Kesha felt like a full circle moment, and what it’s been like to tour with legends Alanis Morissette and Joan Jett. Plus, she shares that despite her busy schedule, she's already written her next record! Morgan gets candid about the gauntlet of media exposure — from good to bad — and how she felt reading some of the more sensational headlines about herself. She also courageously shares about her personal road to sobriety, and opens up about her double mastectomy. Conversation topics that she hopes help others too. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. Hi, everyone. It's Sophia. Welcome to Work in Progress. Hello, Whipsmarties. Today, I am joined by a woman that I have been an admirer of for a long time as a fan of her music and as a person who really respects the way. She has risen above a lot in her life. And after today's conversation, I consider her a new friend. Today we're joined by Morgan Wade.

She is an incredible musician who has really found herself in the center of so many exciting things. Touring with Joan Jett and Alanis Morissette. Her new album, Obsessed, is out, and it's beautiful and powerful, and it's a record that she wrote all on her own. Her third full-length album, in fact, it's the follow. up to her previous album, Psychopath. It's a 14-track project that Morgan says really gets to the essence of who she is as a musician, a storyteller, and a human. As a listener, I think it's perhaps the most raw and vulnerable I've ever heard her, and I just absolutely think she is cementing her status as one of country music's most distinctive talents. And she happens to also

be a really great human. She has talked so openly with her fans about her journey into sobriety she just celebrated seven years sober about her choice to have a preventative double mastectomy to keep herself safe from a cancer risk and really about what it's like to suddenly be thrust into the world of fame and how hard it can be to be one person against the internet i am so grateful for her candor for her willingness to bring her whole self to conversation and for the example she sets i'm pretty excited today that i get to to tell her that she's had an example even for me. So with no further ado, let's get to it with the wonderful Morgan Wade. Well, hi, it's so nice to finally meet you. How are you doing?

I'm doing good. How about you? I'm all right. I've been traveling a lot for work and I just like oh the the feeling I get when I think about you having to tour and you know manage your whole life in the midst of it like hats off to you I don't know if I could do it it's one of those things that it's like you get kind of used to it but at the same time you don't but it's like when I'm at home I'm good for like a week and then I'm like just feel strange to be sleeping in the same bed every night totally totally it's that weird thing right I think about that, I'm constantly like, God, I just wish I could be home. I wish I could have a routine and then I get home and I get antsy. Yeah, I think that anybody that's like creative that, you know,

has to travel, whether it's film or, you know, music or any of that, I don't do too well being at home too long. Yeah. Yeah, I think when you're a creative sitting still can be tricky. I've started to even realize that if I like, if I have a little fidget tool or something, I can sit for longer, but just sitting is hard. Yeah. No, I totally get it. If I have like a meeting or something and it's just on the phone, I walk laps. I'm on this, you know, tour right now.

And so there's like these huge parking lots. And so I will be walking circles all day and the security guards who just stare at me. Like, what are you doing? You weird. You weird how, what are you doing? But yeah, I don't like it still. Yeah. Well, I feel you there. It's interesting, like, for me, figuring those things out about myself as an adult makes certain things about my childhood and, like, my attention span or whatever, track a little more for me. When you kind of sit in this amazing place, you know, you're out on a tour, you're making music you love, people are obsessed with it. you know there's the exciting things i think that come with that and also the the hard things that come with uh notoriety growing i i feel for you girl um but do you when you sort of sit here and

look at your life like if you look back at your childhood do you feel like you see a through line like were you always really artistic were you always wanting um you know to be up and moving Did you always know you wanted to make music, or does your life now look completely different than you thought it would when you were a little kid, like eight or nine years old? You know, I think I obviously knew that I wanted to be involved in music. I don't think I knew what capacity that was going to be. You know, I always like when writing songs and poems stories like that when I was like little. but I didn't think I could sing I thought my voice was weird

so I didn't sing for anybody I was like very secretive about it but I enjoyed writing songs and playing my guitar in my room by myself and I just did it because I loved it it wasn't like I was trying to do that for anybody else and then eventually once I got into college

I started drinking and then that liquid courage gave me that ability to be like playing for my you know my friends and stuff at the dorm you know it evolved but i don't think that i thought it would be this you know but i just know um i had a lot of trouble sleeping as a kid and um my mom took me to the doctor it was like one of those things it was had severe oCD like it was a whole routine to go to bed and and And of course, my parents were never getting any sleep because I was like, oh. And so the doctor was telling me ways to calm down. And if you need to think about something that you really want to do,

something you love that makes you happen. So I would fall asleep every night picturing myself on a stage and playing. And that's why I thought about every night. And then now I look at it, I'm like, okay, that was kind of manifesting there a little bit. but that's what I would fall asleep thinking about every night. But I didn't grow up really in an area or around anybody that did anything like that. So I didn't think that that was a possibility. And, of course, you know, it wasn't like I could get on the Internet and look up, you know, videos on, you know, how to do that.

It wasn't like things are now, you know, but it was something I knew in my head, I wanted to do, but I didn't have that confidence yet. Yeah. So when do you think that changed? Like, if you knew you wanted to be a musician and you finally got comfortable starting to share music with people in college, was that when you felt like you were able to say, oh, I really want to do this as my career? Yeah, for sure.

Of course, you know, freshman year of college and my mom, I, I remember her being when I came home. I was like, hey, I'm going to go play this little show. She's like, excuse me? Like, what are you talking about? Because she was so like, me and me and she was like, yeah, I'm going to go. She was like, what are you? You're just playing in total?

I'm going to go sing. And she was very confused by that. And so, which I don't blame them because this came out of nowhere. And so I was like, yeah, I don't really want to stay in school anymore. Don't want to finish college. And, of course, that was like, yeah, no, you need to. What are you talking about? This came out of nowhere.

And, of course, I look back, and I totally get it. At the time, I thought, you know, my parents were crazy and everybody was being unfair. And I ended up getting a bachelor's degree, and I did continue for four years. But every weekend, I was out, like, playing shows. I pretended to be my own booking agent, to have a fake email. I was like, I formed a band on crazy. Reds list. Amazing.

He's not really safe. Me and two of my friends from class, there was an ad that were looking for a singer, and I rode over to a sketchy part of town, and I went in this guy's basement. And fortunately, this isn't like a crime podcast, and you're not like talking to my mom. And, you know, I'm still here, but, yeah. And it just all kind of went from there. I, like, look back, and it was like, step by step for me but you know you eventually it just started to happen and everything kind of fell

into place that's so cool and so what was sort of the journey like once you started a band and really started to perform like how did it happen you know like I said you know sort of Craigslist thing And then it just kind of became taking any kind of opportunity that I can get. So, you know, sometimes I look back and, you know, you have like moments where you're like, you know, you feel like, I had a drain and like, what is the point? You know, I had a tough year last year. Everything. It was like, the whole like, damn it's out of being known.

And then I was like, do I don't want to do this anymore? because I, like, look back at the beginning. I was like, I was so hungry for it. I was, like, excited. Like, if three people showed up and were listening to me, I was like, I'm going to make those three people like me. And I had to kind of remember how that was. But I did.

I just took every opportunity I could get. And I worked a job at a gym, and I had to be up at 3.30 every morning. Yeah, five days a week. And then, like, once a month. on a Saturday and I would do that and I would sit in there and I would just send out email after email after email trying to get any gig I can get and so I just I did my own merch I did like everything I booked it I tried to build the website like I just put

everything I had into it and things just started they started to kind of fall into place and I mean there were times it just absolutely sucked yeah and then if It was like, you know, to me, it was just not giving up. It was just like pushing and doing whatever I could. And honestly, letting my songs kind of just speak to themselves. I just kept writing. At the end of the day, it was like, no matter what, I was writing music. And I was having fun at that point.

But it ended up, I met a guy named Sabler Vaden at a music festival. And he was just getting into producing. He plays for Jason Isbo. Well, that was a huge fan, and it ended up, I had been playing this song about like a Wilder days, and people were really like catching on to that song. They really liked it, and that was the first song I ended up catching him when he sat down and did it right, and then, of course, that ended up, you know, three years later, two years later being a radio single, and it kind of transpired, and then just everything

went from there, but it feels like it went quickly, and then at the same time, a little bit. It kind of feels painfully slowed. Yeah. Well, it's like they always say it takes a decade to become an overnight success. Right, right. And it's so much invisible work, like just so many things that people don't see. And, you know, the length of the road you had to walk to get to this place where you're sitting on a tour bus, you know, out going around the country. It's wild. How has the adjustment of it been for you? And I'm curious because, you know, one of the things that I appreciate in people, and I think one of the reasons I admire you is because you've stood very vulnerably and honestly about your human experience. Like you've talked about sobriety, you've talked about, you know, learning how to cope with this sort of attention. All of these big, you know, journeys and stands that you take. And I feel for you because I also know, like, when you go from the, like in your line of work, when you go from being reported on by CMT to being reported on by TMZ, even if it's all bullshit,

it's hard and it's stressful and like, it's hard to accept that people would rather embellish your life to the point of turning you into someone you're not in the press for clicks and, cash, then care about what's true for you in your life and respect your human identity as a fragile feeling person in the world. And like, I don't know, I've been through this more than once in the 20 years I've been on TV and I've certainly seen you go through it. And I'm just like, you know, you still have to get out and get on stage on tour every night and make people happy. like how do you figure out how to make space for your work and your life when sometimes they get complicated like that yeah well I would say like last year when everything you know guys the media

was popping off I definitely didn't want to go play I had a show like a few days later and I was like I don't I really don't want to go I don't want to leave my house I don't want to do anything I know because it was just so bizarre the only time I had been in you know stuff like that again was pertaining to my music it wasn't pertaining to you know gossip columns any of that stuff so I just it was it was such a weird a weird thing but I went and you know of course it was it was different because the people that were there listening to me were fans and they just honestly did not care they were more so hey are you good yeah so you go do the VIP stuff you do the meet and greets and they're not in there

asking me questions they're in there like how are you doing have your sobriety like kind of checking in so it was like good for me but I was also like I can't let other people win yeah it it was a it's been a really like difficult to experience but now I'm just like numb to it and I had to kind of sit back and laugh because I'm like you guys are kind of grasping at straws at this point yeah but it was definitely a weird really weird time because it's like you go to bed and then you wake up and it's all the stuff like everywhere and uh but it's been good for me too just in the sense of uh I think it's been it's been uh I have a tracker on it because I was like you know super addicted

and just scrolling whether it was looking and trying to read and feeling bad about myself and then being like well this isn't even true but I'm sitting here feeling bad about it

so I've been on the internet 71 days I took everything on my phone I let my team write and I've gotten more done and these last 71 days and I don't miss it I don't know

I might log back into Instagram one day but as now, like, I'm really content without it. And I was like, you were wasting a lot of time just, even if it was just videos and dogs that I would watch over there. Yeah. It's so much time. Yeah.

Well, it's so easy to escape into those spaces. And I don't know why, maybe it's because to be an artist, you have to be sensitive. You know, I don't know why so many of us are so much more sensitive to the negativity than whatever the positivity is, but I know at least for me, like, realizing that my justice complex, as my therapist likes to call it, like, I am obsessed with justice and truth and believe, you know, we should be good to people. And so, like, that thing gets really fired up in me when I know that things are being said about my life that are just not true. and like to your point when they're grasping at straws like when i started to look at some of it

for me last year i was like what what are we talking about like how i can't sneak into an event that's being photographed with anybody let alone when i show up with a group of nine friends who's sneaking around or like you know it's just everything was so surreal including like you know i storylines about like, oh, you know, the chemistry upon meeting. I was like, did I just meet my friend of five years at this event? Like, what are we talking about? It was all just so surreal for me. And I guess what I'm, what I find so interesting is like, we all go, well, why are we doing this? Like, why am I even paying at any mind? Yet we all feel so wounded by it. And it's like, I don't know.

It's like the golden handcuffs, right? Like, you're online so you can do the work you love, but the online life hurts your ability to even exist as a person, let alone to do your job. Right. I mean, I just one day, like, turned everything off, and I was just sitting there, and I was like, see, it doesn't really exist.

It does not really exist. It's just this, like, place. It's just like logging on to this, you know, video game or something. You can cut it off. It really does not affect you unless you let it, which is so easy to say. And I'd have these moments where I'm like, yes. And then, you know, and I look back. A lot of it, I think, is like deep-rooted childhood stuff,

where I want to be, you know, that you want to be loved so bad. And I would have done anything just that I didn't want anybody to be mad. me. I was like always thinking someone was mad at me and so it was a lot of that. So then to to all of a sudden be thrust into that and to think, well, all these people hate me for, you know, I don't understand why. I was like, you don't know me. Like if you met me and half of my, if you met me on the street, you wouldn't say that to me. Yeah. You would, you would understand that I'm actually, you know, a nice person despite the resting bitch face. Like I, I, everybody but it's yeah it's uh i will say um last year seeing like everything too that you were

going through uh was a little helpful to me to not not that i'm glad you went through that but it was like okay there's other people going through yeah similar stuff and they're still alive and they're doing good yeah and now a word from our sponsors that I really enjoy, and I think you will too. Well, and I think what was so interesting for me to start to realize was, you know, like I came of age essentially in public on an early aughts teen drama. Like people die for the, any version of anybody's life that they can make feel like it's the teen drama offline or off screen they love because it's profitable and i thought i understood

that dynamic and like you know for like even for your friendship with kyle or relationship or whatever however you want to define it i realize i don't want to put words in your mouth but like i feel like her world tends to operate in that space too like they want the fodder and they forget that it's about people and I don't know like I thought I understood how toxic all that was until I saw those worlds mobilize against all women and I was like oh I thought the misogyny was breathtaking before in the world of tabloids it's it's like compounded to the nth degree when you just have women to talk about like you guys are garbage people Oh, it was, I mean, yeah, the things, the headlines that I was, like, reading, and I was like, why is it okay for you to say that?

Like, it was, it was, it was really, and then, you know, there would be people on the internet being like, well, they're paying or they're calling. Oh, yeah. They're asking people. I was like, shut up. Like, you have absolutely no idea what you're talking about right now. I don't like, I know, I have never called the paparazzi. I would not know how to do that. I think people also don't understand it's immensely painful to be treated like a commodity rather than a person.

And it's also really scary to get stalked. Like, and that's what that is. Like, for some reason, we have this word, you know, we call them paparazzi. But, like, when you get stocked, when you wind up in, like, car chases trying to get away from people, when people follow you into, like, private spaces, it's actually quite scary. And a lot of people are like, oh, you know, well, well, privilege this, famous that. And you're like, okay, you come do it for a day and see how you like it.

I mean, I was followed from West Hollywood to Pasadena one day. The dude, followed me all the way there to go to the studio. Yeah. I'm like, dude, you follow me for home and I want to. Yeah. Wait, do you record in Pasadena? I did a couple things for the new record out there. Okay.

I did junior high and high school in Pasadena, so this is full sidetrack. There's my ADHD brain. I'm like, wait, squirrel. Yeah, and I, you know, I go back and forth between like Nashville and then I can get some stuff done in L.A. So we were on the road and we happened to get some stuff out there. But I do remember the first time because there's... there's a guy that hangs out at LAX airport. Oh, yeah.

In the term, I don't know if you've seen that dude, but he just hangs out there. Video camera guy? Yeah, video camera guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I forget his name. We ended up one day. I was like, do you live here, man? I was like, what's your name?

I was like, good God. Because the first time I was there, and I landed and I was coming through there, and people were like, they called. I was like, I had a call in my sweatpants that day. I was like, I did not call anybody. I had been on a plane for like six hours. What I think people in the, out in the, you know, world don't understand is we're not the ones calling. It's video camera guy pays somebody who's making minimum wage at the airline to call and say,

these are the people on our flight today. Because look, like, we can stay in hotels under aliases and all. you cannot fly under an alias that is a federal offense so like they know when you're on a plane and you know people are making money however they're making it but i i do think i i just really appreciate that you've been open about how hard it is to be picked apart like that and to be to be turned into like a caricature of yourself like what was really hard for me last year um and you know I don't know, obviously, the details of your circumstance, but I do know that, like, it's a really long road to end something or leave something with someone that you have loved and tried to make

things work with. And, like, man, for me, just having, like, the saddest, hardest, hardest time be turned into something, like, salacious, you know, to feel like what a precious gift that, like, a group of women saved my life at my lowest when I was like, if I do this for one more day, I'm just going to die. And I realized how many other people were feeling that way. We're feeling so tortured and sad in their homes. And like the lifeblood of having support and the gift of watching other people be courageous because courage can be contagious. Like those things I want to talk about as so sacred and then they get turned into like icky sticky gross um out in the world and i'm like god that's just so sad and like why are we like this and why are we like this to women why are we like

this man i i i remember when princess kate oh yeah all the cave meddleton all that was everybody was like where she and i'm like stop it and then she goes forward i have cancer i'm like you see how sick that was we said here a minute and the woman has cancer And we're so, like, where is she at? What is she doing? Yeah. And I'm like, stop. You're just because you're just not entitled to know anything.

And that's why I'm like, I don't say, I'm like, you guys don't, I'm not saying anything unless I watch. Oh, that's just it. You don't, it's not. It's not for you. And that was what was really interesting is like for me, I know once the train leaves the station, there's kind of like no good way to deal with. but like I really had to sit and I sat for a long time because I was like there's a few things at play here I don't even know what's happening in my world yet so I don't know how to talk to you about it as I figure it out I should have the space to do that and then there was this other thing

where I was like well the misogyny is breathtaking because it's all women and also there's this thing of like it's 2024 uh you know i guess 2023 and i'm like and you you want to like out someone for sport i'm a grown up i'm really secure in myself but like what about kids who kill themselves over these things like this is not a light thing that they are seeing happen to someone who is in the public eye who they probably perceive as having like privilege or power and it's happening to me so what's going to happen to them and then i was like are you trying to make me ashamed i was like oh if you thought like outing me at the top of a journey was going to make me feel ashamed. Like I'll sit and be quiet and figure out my life. But once I have it figured out, like, watch me be

proud bitches. I hope you choke on my pride. I hope you enjoy it. Like I'm just going to flip the script on you. I'm not going to play this game. And like, I don't know. This thing that we that we expect to know the details of people's lives, but also that we don't give people a minute to figure them out. Like, if you're an anonymous person, you get to, like, figure out your life and then talk about it when you're ready. And that shifts for us.

And, like, for some reason, people want to focus on the things that are the least important instead of the most. And I think for you, especially bringing up, like, the Kate Middleton of it all, like, I know how personal that is for you. Because people want to focus on, like, where is she?

what's this, what's that? She's dealing with an illness. People want to chatter, chatter, chatter about your life. And like, you know how hard that is. You've talked so openly about how last year you underwent a preventative double mastectomy because of a gene mutation that would make it so likely to, for you to suffer from cancer. And like, oh, I don't know. I wondered if watching her go through all that, given what you were going through both like in the press and also in your personal literal health life felt wild for you. So it's interesting to hear you bring that up. Yeah, I just, and I think I learned a lesson too, because until I, it's built with the gossip and all of that, sure, I would have sat back and thought, ooh,

yeah, let me see. I'm so curious about like the person getting a divorce and this, this person what are they doing is for you know and just like reading these tablets and then now I'm like no no I don't believe anything I read I'm like leave alone I just don't believe anything and I don't engage in it because I remember you know the thing is it's I'm like that's somebody's daughter that somebody's mom that someone's sister that's somebody's everything that's a real human being and I was like and we're picking on a part and we're just it's yeah I can't I can't it you know I don't the internet can be like such a and it's such a like you said earlier it's it's so weird it's like the internet helps so much with your career I mean you basically if you're not on

TikTok or doing something the label is like on your ass about it but it's also it's like this fine line and I just think with me personally for my addicted personality it's just not yeah it's not a good move for me yeah it's it can be heavy and now a word from our sponsors who make this show possible one of my friends and I talked about the internet is like when you really get in that loop and you realize you're on it too much. Like it's basically just like emotional cutting. Like it's a self-harm kind of thing and like that. I think when you start to think about it in that way, and I imagine especially for you, you know, being seven years sober. By the way, congratulations. Seven's a big number. Thank you. When you can identify like, oh, this is making me

feel like that bad thing, it probably feels important to shift your habits. What made you decide to quit drinking? Like, was it, was it a feeling you had? Was it like a moment? Was it like a journey to go, oh, I think maybe this is just not for me? So I didn't, I started drinking like my freshman year. And then I was like, oh, I'm pretty good at this. And then I started doing the whole like weekend playing shows. And of course, you know, I was underage. But it's everywhere. Does that even matter? Right.

But a lot of these venues and stuff, I wasn't getting paid, but it was like, you can have a free bar tab. So, like, yeah, I'm going to, I'm like, okay, so I'm getting on this, I'm a college student. So on the weekends is getting on this free beer. Like, absolutely. You know, I started taking advantage of that. And it just became, I was like, okay, I'm good at this. And I like it. And I like how I, you know, can act and how outknowing I am when I'm drinking.

And then it just started to become this thing where now that I get home, like what, you know, what are you been doing? I started going to go down and then I was like, all right, I'm going to not drink. Let's not drink. And I woke up face down in a parking lot when people shaking me trying to get me to wake up. I had played a show and I was like, all right, I was pretty good at hiding how much I had drank too. You know, I was pretty good at making it. I get the same drink in my head. And I was like, I'm going to drive home, see you guys, and they woke me up.

I was faced out in the parking lot. You know, I was, like, I got to stop. And so I didn't drink for a couple weeks. And then it was like, okay, I'm good. I want to, you know, it's like I couldn't not do it. And so I went to New York for the first time and played these really, really. crappy shows you know I was just excited

and you know of course I drank more that night than I've ever drank and I woke up the next morning and I was just like you you I felt I don't know it was the weirdest feeling I've ever had I've never felt like that since but it was it was very much

like you have to kill yourself and that it was this quite like dark feeling and it was like you you've got it this is it this is it and you're not going to end up I felt like that for days and I was like yeah I'm not I'm not going to drink anymore

I was like I've got to is that what this is that what this feeling is like the depression was just so heavy from that and I was you know obviously I've always had a lot of you know OCD anxiety and so then obviously you go drink all this and then the coming down from that is just

it makes it 10 times worse and that feeling lasted for like two weeks And I did not drink. I didn't touch anything. I got back home and I was like, okay, what, what do I do? So I went and got like all the sobriety books. And I was like, you're going to learn to love sparkling water. We're going to like be that asshole that just drank sparkling water and that's it.

And I just engrossed myself in it. And it was hard. And then, of course, it was hard too when your friends are like, yeah, okay. And then, you know, they're kind of, some of them were like, you don't have a problem. You just, you need to chill. And I'm like, no, if I, if there's something I don't want to do and I can't stop, then that's a problem. Yeah. And I remember texting my mom and my grandma and my aunt in a group message.

I said, hey, I'm going to, I'm going to stop drinking. And they were like, thank God we've been hoping. And I was like, I was like, all right. When you see stuff like that, you're like, okay. and I literally I just I was like all right get up early and go to the gym every day and just really start and get on this this routine and again it's been hard I mean last year I seriously didn't think I was going to remain sober yeah there was several times that I was like yeah I'm going to drink I just you know I just wanted I was like what to it matter anymore and thank god you know i got through those moments and had people in my life that i was you know able to talk to but uh i think i think too when you first get sober it's like obviously not easy but you can remember why you're not drinking in the reasoning but the further

along i get you start to be like well maybe i'm different maybe you have to change maybe i can handle a drink or two and then you know i have a relapse dream and i wake up and i wake up and I'm like, the alcohol, it never tastes good. And as soon as I do it, I just destroyed every time. So I'm like, I feel like I need those dreams. Yeah, that's actually really kind of amazing that you get to key into your subconscious like that. Because, you know, in hindsight, it's like, of course everything feels real clear in hindsight, right? You can go, you can look back and be like, wow, maybe all these things like were happening for a reason before I saw it.

It maybe, you know, it can be the great things, but I also think, to your point, like, addiction is kind of like being an abusive relationship. This thing continues to harm you. But, like, years after you're out of the abusive relationship, you might look back a little more fondly on the happy times. And that's the danger. And so I absolutely get, yeah, I get what you're saying there for sure. How is it now, like seven years in, because you've been public about it and because, you know, you've got a good crew of people around you, like your collaborators, producers, the folks you work with, friends, family, like, do you feel like you're in a really good situation with it where people, instead of saying, yeah, come on, not you, are like, yeah, you, and we're going to support you. We're going to be here for you. We're going to make sure we can help you maintain this. Or does it feel like more of an individual path? I mean, it's obviously an individual path, but I mean, it was, it, everybody around me very much keeps an eye on me.

That's great. It's very like, everybody knows I'm sober and we don't, I mean, I don't even think there's any, like, alcohol on the bus. I also don't want to be that person, and I made it very clear of, hey, I don't care if you drink around me, because the thing is, I have to be able to be strong in that sense. I can't, I'm like, I play music for a living, it's everyone is drinking. It's the juniors, there's bars, and that is great. And, you know, I'm not willing to say, well, if you shouldn't drink, there's some people that can go have a glass of wine or do whatever, and they're fine.

I'm not. So it is my own personal journey, but everyone around me can be super great. I mean, for, you know, my sober anniversary, I mean, I had people in VIP. I had so many people bringing me, like, gifts and cards. And then they got me, my team got me a cake, red velvet cake for my seven years. So I feel very, very supported. And every year I go, I have this, I like to go. buy me something nice as a little a little gift i'm like all right you got to go buy yourself

something nice splurge on something um as a as a little as a little gift yeah it's like an anniversary present i love that yeah yeah yeah for myself and that's nice yeah yeah so being you know on the other side of last year you know with your health stuff being back on tour like how has this next phase felt because I read that you wrote every song on the new album on obsessed solo so like do you do you feel like you're just in this whole new phase like you walked through the fire and you came out so much stronger yeah yeah I'm a hundred times better than I was um you know I I there's not even there's no comparison so you know I have as much is it's uh it sucked you know i've got to thank a lot of those people because i'm like now i

can handle anything i'm like what also i'm like what what else there's nothing worse that could happen at this point as far as like the media stuff and you know i had to really sit back and look at it i was like there are people starving there are people being murdered you know they're they're overseas. It's just like there's so much stuff. There's children in war zones and all these people being hurt. And I was like, I wake up and I have my coffee and I do all this. And I'm like, so what?

Trolls on the internet are talking smack about me. I was like, I am so blessed. And when you look at things from that perspective and I'm like, who cares? It also, you know, it just makes you be like, hey, there's so much more to life. There's so much more that you need to do. who just it's I had to get out of the

low as me mentality and I'm not saying you know I think it was good for me to process that and be able to sit but you know when everything

started happening I just remember that was the day all this crap started like blowing up I was with my family and I don't get much I'm like that

with my mom my stepdad and my siblings and like my actual you know my dad and stepmom were there so like

all my parents like everybody was there we're having like a cookout and I can't even eat and I'm a nervous wreck and I remember my little sister she's five and she like grab me in my face she said why you cry so much why you crying so much and I was like I look back and I'm like my gosh that was the last time I've had all of them together and I was like that was like that was you know a year ago and I was like I said they're so concerned about these people that don't matter and I was like I'll be damned if I let myself do it that. I mean, like, I don't get that moment back. And I was like, I let them have those moments because I was so far gone. I was like, I'm not, I'm not doing that anymore. And it, uh, I learned a lot and, and I'm, but I'm definitely in a better place. And I feel like you are too. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's like it, it takes practice, like in the way that I imagine you have to maintain sobriety, like I have to maintain reminders with myself to not need to change people's minds, to not need everybody to like me, to not, you know, like my friends were like, but you know, you know, so what does it matter if a group of awful people that you do not know want to call you

names? Essentially what they're doing is looking at you and saying your hair's blue and you're like, but it's not. And they're saying, yes, it is. I see it, it's blue. And you're going, but it, but it's not. Like the hair on my head, you know, currently, at least for me getting ready to do this next movie, the hair on my head is red, okay? Like, I have red hair.

And people are like, no, it's blue. Like, what the, who, what does that opinion matter? And there's something about, like, putting it in a perspective like that that was helpful for me and understanding, like, I am one human and to have, millions of people and outlets and things be like abusive and cruel. Of course it's hard. Of course it's hard. But I don't need to your point to like let them into the cookout with my family. I don't need to lose what is real in my life over what false opinions other people have. And I think that is really, I don't know, I think that's like a good way to start trying to deal with it. And you know,

It's been fun for me to go back to work and, like, channel some of that energy into it. I imagine it's so fun for you to go, you know, up on stage at night and be in the space that you love, doing what you love, and be reminded of who you are. Yeah. Oh, for sure. I mean, I'm, like, looking. I look over, and I literally have Joan Jet watching my set. And then, you know, I get off stage. And Alanis is texting me, and she was like, I can hear you for my green room and you just sound so much.

You know, and I'm like, a year ago, I thought, you know, of course, I always used to send words. I'm like, your career is over, which I still don't know why I thought that, but, you know, it's just like you think the worst. We all share it. Yeah. And then I'm like, I sit here and I'm like, this has been the most amazing tour. Everyone's so kind. They're just great people to be around. and it's a very healthy environment. I love that. Things get better, but it's, yeah.

I love that. We'll be back in just a minute, but here's a word from our sponsors. It's so cool as a fan to watch you having this moment. Like, I grew up on those women, on Alanis, on Joan Jett. I grew up on Melissa Etheridge, who you remind me so much of. Like, there are things. things about you, too, that I'm just like, your presence and energy. And she's one of my favorite humans.

So I got to have on the podcast this year, and I just, like, lost my mind. I was like, hey, Melissa, I know I'm supposed to be cool, but eight-year-old me is going to come in the room and talk to you for five minutes, and then she'll leave and I'll pretend I didn't, like, gush in this way. And we were just cackling. She's so lovely. And, like, I don't know. When I read that the tour got announced, I was like,

How is Morgan feeling? Like, is it such a trip to, to your point, look to your left, see John Jett, look to your right, see Yalanis? Like, are you losing your mind? Are you okay? It's just so funny to walk in every day and Joan Jett's dressing rooms right beside of yours and it's just... What a trip.

I mean, just these two women, too, who both just really went out there, did their same thing and like change the course for for females who you know don't I you know I go through this a lot where I'm like I don't really know where I fit and I'm like I'm not you know this Barbie doll with this crystal clear voice you know it's like it's such a so I think sometimes I'm like man and maybe I should be more like that I'm like no you know and so then I see these two women that have just totally like done their own thing these beautiful talented women

and they're doing so great and it's just I mean you just learned so much from watching them and they they can they're just so so great love it's just incredible well and I imagine like there's to your point there's so much you learn

from watching them but like you know they're also these incredibly like wise women who I'd imagine could be such great mentors. Like, have you asked them for any advice, you know, experiences from their own careers or in the industry, or are you waiting until the end of the tour for that? Yeah, I haven't really, like, said too much, like, around that.

It's just been, like, more just conversation, you know, Alanus will drop by my dressing room and check in and she'll text me every couple days to make sure I'm good and it's just so funny it was like the first day I met Joan she was watching and I got off the stage

and she was like hey sorry sorry I shouldn't be over here bothering and I was like you're Joan Jet you can bother me all you want to and her assistant or torment someone will stand right there and they're like thing about Joan Jed is Joan doesn't know she's young yet and she's just like the most down-to-earth person and I'm like

this is so crazy because it's she just she came out on the balcony the other day the side of my green room and she was like oh I shouldn't bother you right now getting ready to go on stage and then just kind of turns around I was like you you you can again you can bother me all you want but anytime you want ma'am anytime you want you're cool to bother me but it's been yeah it's been really great and in alanus you know she'll she sent me a gift because she always has her tea she's got this special tea that she always adds with her so she sent me a whole gift of all this tea and everything like really sweet and it's just been it's been really nice um that's so great to me and i'm honestly going to be really really sad when this tour's over i was like already i think

we only have like having more shows or something like that and i'm like looking at that and i'm like I've become friends with the crew, you know, from Jones team and Alanis's team. And I'm like, this has been, this has been the best tour I've ever been on. I also did a tour with Chris Stapleton, and they were also super nice. And so, but this has been the longest run I've ever done. I know, looking at it from the beginning, I've seen all those dates. It gets a little like, you're going to be gone. This tour started June 9th.

It ends August 10th. You're like, okay, this is long, and you don't know. And then you get here, and everyone just been amazing. And I just got a new dog while I was out here, a little French bulldog. And so that's been, you know, an adventure trying to train him on the bus. Oh, I bet. It's been a big, it's been an eventful couple of, I say a couple weeks. It feels like a couple weeks, but it's been like a month.

Yeah, you're really in it. And it's interesting, you know, you're on this tour. were with these powerhouse women, you released a song on the new album, Walked on Water with Kesha, who, like, is in her season of, you know, reclaiming her art and reclaiming her power as a woman. Like, it strikes me as so interesting that you're getting this long experience with Joan and Alanis. And then you and Kesha did this song together, and you had to record, it was the day you

met in person, right? Yeah. Yeah. The opposite experience, you just went right into the deep end. What was that like? So I was like when Kesha, you know, first put that first record out, I was immediately obsessed with her I was like. But I just have the best, some of the best memories that I have riding around in my cousin's Mustang

and blaring, you know, that record. but I was so obsessed with Keshek, but I was like the kid on YouTube finding the, like, leak songs. And I remember trying to add her mom on Facebook. Because I was like, and of course, I had to tell her all of this.

I was like, because I had two others grown up. Elvis and you. Oh, my wall. I was like, this is the level. I was like, totally in love with her. And so when, you know, we got to to meet and we went that day and we sat on the beach in Malibu and just sat there and chatted and she's kind of crazy because she just, the water was freaking cold and I don't even know what month this was. It was still cold out and she just ran and got in the water. I was like, no,

I'm not. I'm not going to be doing that. But then we went to the studio and she was like, okay, we'll be there eight. And I'm like, PM, right? Okay, PM. You know, because I'm like, for me, that was like 10 p.m. Yeah. And I was like, okay, you know, what used to that West Coast time? But she used to start singing, and I'm like, you know, that was such a full circle moment for me

to have this person that you admired for so long and just like everything she's been through. And I got to hear, you know, she put out that song, Joy Ride. Yeah. So I actually got to hear that before it was out. So she played that and then she played a couple other songs. And it's just, you know, people, they've always seen, like, the TikTok version of her.

But, like, she, I've heard some of these newer songs, too, that it's just, like, her voice is just, you know, TikTok's a great song, obviously. But it's so cool to hear her singing about it. She's just vocally so talented. And she's one of those people that she doesn't have a mean bone in her body. It's like you leave her feeling better than we've got there. She's such a spiritual person, and I was like, man, I can't wait for the world to see this woman who owns all of her stuff and who's free now. It's so cool. I love it.

I love to see it. Well, it's interesting. Like this, everything that I sort of think about for all of you, really, for you, for her, you know, the women you're on tour with, like everyone has these sort of Phoenix journeys, right? Like, you find your power, you find your purpose. I even think about, you know, the tour coming right after you released an album that you wrote solo for the first time. Like, everything just reads like growth. So when you think about where you're going next, or maybe the year ahead of you, like, what on the horizon feels like your work in progress now? Yeah.

Well, I mean, I've already written the next record. So, you know, I've already, like, got the next one in the, in the back. I mean, it's already finished. So I have written so much stuff, and I'm like, so for me, you know, obviously, last year, you know, I took off for my surgery. Yeah. And while it was not a break, per se, it was a bit of a break. and it was nice to have that downtime, so I've decided, like, I'm definitely going to take December and January off. For the most part, there's, like, a couple things kind of sprinkled in there, but, you know, eventually I'm going to have to have a hysterectomy because I also have the ovarian cancer gene.

So I have to start the egg retrieval process because I do want to have to do. So I've got to start doing that. Oh my gosh. If you need anything, I've done it so many times. Okay. Yeah. Gotcha. Okay. Yeah. Well, yes, then I might need to be hitting you up to ask you. Yeah, I'll give you all the info. Talking to the doctor has been, it kind of goes over your head.

So, you know, I've got that going on and then putting out a new record. But I've just got, like, kind of gotten into the acting world. So I've done one movie so far, and I've got a bunch of, other stuff on the docket so like that's been exciting for me it's like a new challenge it's something different and and i'm just i'm happy i feel like i'm the happiest that i've been in a really long time and yeah i'm just uh hopefully things just keep growing and and doing well but i feel like uh i'm looking forward to taking a little bit of time myself and and going on a bit of a vacation i'm like i need to go somewhere tropical and just sick

turn my phone off and sit and not do anything else. I was like, you're working really hard. I need to enjoy. And I told my family, I was like, I want to go on a big family vacation next summer. I'm taking time in June. I was like, let's go somewhere. Let's get a beach house and let's just sit. My siblings are growing up.

And I'm like, I just want to exist with them for a bit. Yeah. It's so good. It's like a friend of mine explained to me years ago, she said, look, you have to stop looking at rest as unproductive time and start looking at rest as an active resistance that is necessary to survive in a world that is this turned up. And I don't know what it was about reframing it like that, but it made me feel like I was allowed to give myself permission for some quiet time.

And I'm happy you're getting that for yourself too. It's great. it's a tough thing to do sometimes when you're used to work in working so much. I mean, that's a work in progress for sure, right? Exactly. 100%. Yeah.

Oh, well, thank you so much for joining me today. Thank you for the way that you, look, I know it's not easy, but like I really do mean this. Thank you for the way that you choose to lead and stand, you know, in yourself in this insane world that, you know, none of us could have ever been prepared for. It's, it's so special to watch. And like, yeah, when some shit was really wild in my life for a while, like, you helped

and we didn't even know each other yet. So I just want to say thank you. Again, I was watching everything going on with you. And I was keeping an eye on that, not for looking for anything salacious, but just because I was like, you know, I felt a connection there as far as all that does. All right, my dear. All right. Thank you so much.

Thank you. You're wonderful. Talk to you soon. Bye. Bye. Okay. Bye. Podcasts.