Dreamscapes Podcasts - Dreamscapes Episode 214: Sardo Numpsie

Episode Date: December 26, 2025

Kisha Reynolds ~ https://www.321deepsleep.com/

So the reason I tell people, don't tell me your dream, is that I don't want to hear about it a week before we talk, five minutes before we talk. What I need to do is go into it completely blind and be in the moment with you telling the story for the first time because otherwise it gets messed up. Like I start second guessing. I start making assumptions. Okay. And we don't want to do that. If I can check in with you as we go, then it doesn't work. Okay.

Now, why is that? I don't know. What is my method? I have no fucking clue. What, Ben, what do you do for a living? I'll let you know when I figure it out. Greetings, friends, and welcome back to another episode of Dreamscapes. Today, our special guest is Keisha Reynolds.

She is a certified clinical hypnotherapist, a certified life coach, and the owner of 3-2-1. one deep sleep hypnotherapy. She has a book Beyond the Habit. We're going to talk about that. You can find her at 321, the numbers, 321, deep sleep.com. For my part, would you kindly like, share, and subscribe, tell your friends, always need more volunteer dreamers. I do video game streams Monday through Friday, 5 p.m.

T. 8 p.m. Pacific, most nights of the week, sometimes I'll take Friday off and start a new game on Monday, that kind of thing. This episode is brought to you in part by my new book. came out a little bit ago, and I've been plugging it for weeks now because you've got to tell everybody. It is ABC book 18, O'Neuro Chronology, Volume 4, Prima Rala Quorum. It's Latin for the first of what remains. It is a fourth volume of the original anthology trivium that I wrote way back when,

gathering shorter works of historical dream literature that I couldn't cram into the other ones and I didn't want to leave out. This one has two complete books written by other people. a third article focusing specifically on a long article, by the way. They wrote long articles back then on the Muslim interpretation of dreams and how that looked to this author of the article in the 1850s, 1853, I think. Fascinating work, very, very well referenced. So you're going to want to pick up that.

All this and more at Benjamin the Dream Wizard.com, where you can get downloadable MP3s of this very podcast, so you may take the wizard with you wherever you wander with or without. Wi-Fi. Last but not least, if you'd head on over to Benjamin the Dreamwizard.com, building a community there, free to join attached to my locals account. One of the best ways to reach out to me if you'd like to be a guest. And that is more than enough out of me. We're back to, we're back to Keisha. Thank you for being here. I appreciate your time. Oh, thank you for having me. I'm excited to be here. I'm looking forward to it.

Very cool. Well, we have a lot of crossover in our discipline. So I've got a background in psychology. I worked inpatient psychiatric for too long. And now I got out and decided I'd rather be a wizard. But you do the hypnotherapy thing. And I think I spoke to one other person that did that discipline. But I don't know if you want to start with talking about the book or talking about applied practice, how you help people. Sure. Sure. Well, I'll talk about how I kind of came to hypnotherapy. So prior life, not too long ago, I was actually in human resources, have been. recruiter for many, many years. But I, at one point, I saw, started kind of, I guess, burning out from it, if you will. And I still had mental health as something that has always

been very near and dear to my heart. And so I decided to continue on, you know, and it's just that, and continue on with my, you know, academic trajectory to becoming actually a clinical, you know, psychologist. So I'm a student as well, but along the way, I picked up my certification in hypniphanotherapy. I attended HMI, which is Hypnosis Motivational Institute, very, very good school out of Tarzana, California. And it is run by George Capus, him and Susie Capiz, who runs the American Hypnosis Association. And from there, I, you know, after graduating, I immediately, you know, started working with clients.

And, but what brought me specifically to hypnosis is I suffer from body focused repetitive behaviors myself. Okay. There are a few of them. So when you think about body focused, repetitive behaviors, the main one, you know, that most people know about is tricotillomania or hair pulling. But there is also dermatillomania or excoriation disorder, which is picking, skin picking. There's the chronic nail biting, okay? There is cheek biting, the lip biting. Some

people you see them maybe chewing on their tongue and then scab picking. or picking the cuticles. So when these things are happened, these are more, these are pervasive. Okay, they're very pervasive. So people don't, like, we don't do these things like to hurt ourselves. Typically, these are done because they are a way to create temporary relief, satisfaction, you know, or soothing. say when dealing with something that may be stressful. Even boredom or tension or like oversimulation or like emotional overwhelm.

So body focused repetitive behaviors are also, they are very closely related to OCD. Okay. And people sometimes get the two mixed up. Okay. But there are some, you know, similarities and there's some differences. So BFR, go ahead, I'm sorry. I hate to interrupt, but I want to disclose.

Yeah. I have certain, and people will watch, watch my hands, watch my hands during the show. You'll see me smoothing the sides of my fingernails away from the, you know, the skin away from the nail bed. Yeah. And it's a repetitive self-soothing type of thing. Now, I don't cause bleeding. I don't pick scabs. Right.

To give people an idea. what we're dealing with. There's a spectrum. If you bite off a hang nail once in a while, you don't have a disorder. Don't worry about that. No, no, no, no. There's normal. There's normal. There's something like the scabitches, you pick at it and you just get rid of it because you don't want to feel it anymore on your skin. Fine. This is like next level stuff. So I've got a, I've got a mild version of this where I do this kind of cuticle smoothing behavior. And I'll just, I'll find myself doing it. And I'll stop. And the minute my mind stops thinking about it, I'm back to it. And it would take a tremendous act of will. And since it's harmless,

I leave it alone. But yeah, please continue. I just want to. throw that out there. But that is it. That is a body focus repetitive behavior. And typically, once they develop, they're usually lifelong, okay? But you can go in and out of remission. Mine started, it didn't start out with the hair pulling. It actually started out with this pervasive nail biting. And for me, it was at the result of being, you know, bullied when I was six. But when this all started for me, the term body focused repetitive behavior, which was coined by Christina Pearson, who then later went on to be the founder of the TLC Foundation for Body Focus Repetive Behaviors in the mid-90s. So when this started for me, this was more so in the

early 80s. So that term had not been coins yet. So it then, because we didn't know, know what it was, okay, it then morphed into the hair pulling. So what ended up happening was as I got older and I started getting, you know, like the acrylic nails and all that stuff got older. Then the hair pulling came online. Okay. And, you know, you know, at that point I was, you know, maybe about 16 years old, 15 or 16. Okay. So now, you know, you're in, you know, junior high high school, you know, And I just found myself, I'll never forget it. I was literally like sitting in the lunchroom one day and I just started like pulling my hair, you know. And for me, it was the fascination with the root, the white root at the bulb at the hair.

And so, and for me, and I even, you know, what label the pulls like it wasn't, it was, it was, it was, I had good pulls and bad pulls. So a good pull was if I pulled and I was able to, you know, extract the root. Yeah. I had a similar thing here with my beard. I used to shave it short and sculpted a little better. And there's this area up here where it's thin on my lower cheek. And when I would shave it down, I had the same satisfaction. I let me get this one hair.

Can I get the root? Can I got the root? I got it. I got it. Very, yeah, yeah, very satisfying. Yeah. Yeah. And, you know, and then, but unfortunately, like, for someone like me who has a body focused repetitive behavior, once you start to pull, it's not that you are able to pull one or two strands and leave it alone.

At fact, I'm at that point now where I can do that, okay? But it takes a lot of willpower to be able to do that. And I've been working on myself, you know, but even still, I go in and out of. remission, okay? Would you liken it to the difficulty people have with quitting smoking, the urge? Oh, yeah, oh, definitely. Because hypnotherapy also really works well for that. Yeah, with that, yeah, it's like an addiction.

It lights up the same, you know, reward center in your brain as an addiction, being gambling, you know, smoking, overeating. It lights up that same area in the brain, okay? And once you start to pull, it's almost like a trance kind of takes over you to a certain extent. And you pull, pull, pull, and then you, before, by the time you stop, you then, you know, realize that you've maybe picked a dime size or nickel or quarter size round spot, you know, in your head. Oh, yeah. And it's very much overlap between our two disciplines. and this idea because in the review of republishing all this historical dream literature,

there's always been an attempt to understand what is tramps, what is animal magnetism, you know, hip hypnotism back in the day, and the dream state and other things like religious experiences of visions and altered bodily states. So it's all looking at what is this altered consciousness we're dealing with? What is this change from, I'm clear, coherent, direct, present to I'm somewhere else. I'm here physically, but my brain is not processing or it's processing differently. So, yeah, they've looked into, you know, like whirling dervishes, anything that changed the state of mind. Yeah.

So I just want to throw that in there. Yeah. And here's the thing. So, you know, people do still look at, you know, hypnosis as, you know, kind of like this mysticism, okay? Or it's like magic, but it's not. Well, they put it in the Spooky Woo category. like it's not real science. Yeah, exactly.

And it's actually anything, you know, it's backed by science. Even more so now. It was 30, 40 years ago when I was in school. And it's even more so now, more. Even more sore now where it's backed by science. And we already know things like, you know, repetition can improve memory and things like that. Repetition has other thing like the steady, especially rhythmic beats. And that's why they've got whole channels dedicated to listen to this binaural beat and it'll help you follow.

And I have used them and they work. And you know what? And it's interesting that you bring that up, Benjamin, because I, when I record my sessions for clients, okay, I actually put it, I put it, lay it over a binaural beat or frequency. So, so fasgio frequency. Get that, okay. Yes, that is geared towards helping people to be able to move past. or, you know, or anxiety or helping one, someone, if they are looking to kind of

have more of a spiritual connection with God, okay? There are frequencies that, you know, you can play to be able to get you into that state of mind. So people can understand how common it and how real it is. You brought up religion. Think of certain, for example, Catholic rituals. where there's slow walking, rhythmic swinging of the incense. There's a choir singing it in a, you know,

and I think we probably discovered a lot of these principles. I think there's, there's been a false divergence away from religion. We think science is different, but I don't, I think they're actually the same thing. I think they are. And so they just understood things and put it into practice because it worked in terms of religious ceremony that let's put you into an altered state of receptiveness to the Holy Spirit

or even a translike state of just you know I want to come to church to feel better I want to feel good and so participating I can relax this ceremony whatever it is dissipates tension on a biological level using human voice and rhythmic behaviors and different things it's all real science folks

this is hypnotism is not a joke it's not a scam yeah yeah and it's funny that you mentioned in terms of like religion and kind of science kind of being, you know, walking, you know, side by side. I mean, even take, for example, if like the Book of Revelations, okay, you know, and my past, yeah, my, my pastor, we are going through all of the chapters within this, within this book. And, uh, next fantasy story. In a way, like if you love Lord of the Rings, read the book of Revelations. That's trippy. Actually, it's funny.

you mentioned that my pastor pastor otha he actually talks about the lord of the rings and how in the movie a lot of things that are said are really biblical okay he actually talks about that and he brings up lord of the rings actually quite often and um in the book with revelations the thing about it is that it goes back and forth you know it like goes back and then it will it'll talk about what's going to happen and then it'll kind of go back back and then it'll talk about, you know, so you kind of go back and forth. And one of the things is that it has a lot of, like, symbolism. Many of the things that they are talking about, okay, it's symbolic to what is supposed to be foretold.

So this is a vision, you know, that was had, you know, by Paul, okay, and given to him by an angel 2,000 years into the future, okay? And in doing so, you know, many of the things, and it's interesting because my pastor was saying, you know, a lot of things that they're saying, you have to remember, like AI is even mentioned. This is foretold. Like, all of this is prophecy that we're going through here, you know, everything. And, you know, he was like, you know, okay, like, for example, you have to think about what the words were then. Like, for example, in there, they mention. mentioned he mentioned something about a statue okay but he didn't that's because the word robot was not invented back then he didn't know what a robot was okay all he said then you were able to plug it in and it breathes right that's a robot okay but he didn't know that they didn't have a concept of what that was their length it was more primitive you know they didn't have that you know so it is very a lot of it is symbolic and having to link it you know here and it takes you know someone really knows and understands who can kind of show

you the way so that you can see okay ah this is a symbol for this so no it's not an actual statue that's walking around no but it's a symbol it's symbolic of something you know so yeah you're in the zero bc or whatever and you're looking at something in the future yeah and you're like how do i describe it it's a box but there's pictures exactly it's move well exactly television but you're like exactly you don't have the word TV in your mind right because the product hadn't been invented yet exactly hadn't been invented yet so you know it's it's very interesting that you bring that up oh yeah no I think that's true I think the Bible's full of a lot of things that are like it's part historical document part mythological narrative part symbolic representation

picking picking which is which and sometimes it's all three at the same time but so you go go back even as far as you know Genesis and Garden of Eden people say uh oh serpent talking snake well maybe not literally a talking snake it just says a serpent and that's a conceptual idea now snakes are serpents but it's also a way of a way of being in the world and the the tied up with the deceptive quality of what it is so what exactly the physical object was maybe indeterminate i i don't but talking snake fine it's if that's the way you understand it and that's the way you see it but i think it's also the essence of that deceptive um and you know And they, they had a conception back the time that, you know, things that crawl on their belly were not to be trusted.

So it's the essence, why did you list, why did you make a terrible mistake by listening to the essence of something untrustworthy and get yourself kicked out? Don't do that. Don't get yourself kicked out of the garden. Congratulations. Now the cherubim with the swords are coming. Yeah. And now, and now we all, okay, are now because of that mistake. We all, you know, that's why, you know, a.

people have to work so hard, you know, Adam with that sin. That's why we're now have to work so hard. That's why childbirth is very difficult and painful for women now. You know, all of this goes back to, you know, Adam and Eve. And, you know, what happened in the disobeying his orders, you know? Yeah, but yeah, yeah, a lot of symbolism, you know, in the Bible, lots of it. Absolutely. And then, well, the idea of going all the way back to where all our problems started now,

we're dealing today with the mental health issues. stuff like that. Yes. Yes. So I didn't know if you wanted to jump over to talking about your your book, Beyond the Habit. Sure. Because you gave me the full subtitle and I'm not going to remember. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It won't be, we're coming out the first quarter of next year. Gotcha. So we're still ahead of the game. Yeah. Yeah. So it's called Beyond the Habit, understanding the development triggers and treatments for body focus, repetitive behaviors or BFRBs. So did you do like a, I mean, how did you put the book together in terms of a literature review or top tips and tricks? Well, what I did was actually, I am, I actually joined association.

The one I mentioned was started and founded by Christina Pearson, which is the TLC Foundation for a body focused repetitive behavior. So I became a member of that. And in doing so, I remember asking, you know, to have people give like testimonies, you know, to participants. So I, you know, was able to get like literally like over a hundred, you know, testimonies and people, their stories and things they have been experiencing. And then I was able to then pick out like maybe about a good, you know, 10 or 15 and, you know, or more and kind of put those, you know, into the. the book. Also, a couple of them were my clients, you know, that I work with where I asked their permission if it were okay to use, you know, their story, you know, and talk about it, you know, because it's very common that most people when they have one, body focus, repetitive behavior,

they tend to also have others because they tend to morph into others, okay? But, you know, there are times when they do go into remission where you may stop, you know, but any anything, you know, body focus, repetitive behaviors, unlike OCD, they are more sensory-based, okay? Typically with OCD, when compulsions happen, is usually because something where you don't want to be sick. So, example, someone washes their hands several times because they don't want to get germs, because germs are going to do what? They're going to make you sick, okay?

So that's the reason for the excess, excessive watch. and cleaning. Not so true when you're discussing a body-focused with better behavior. It's not tied to something potentially going wrong. So you're doing this to prevent this thing from happening. Okay. It can happen just boredom. I could be watching TV and the urge may come, you know.

It could be due to stress, like when it first started with me when I was six due to bullying, you know, but it doesn't have to be. It could even be something, a happy occasion. know someone getting married but the stress from helping to plan the wedding could cause someone to kind of slip back into that pattern you know so um but that is you know that and that's what kind of brought me to hypnotherapy actually because you know it was something i suffered with literally for about 36 years and um i got tired of okay not doing something about this okay and you know like I said, I would go in and out, you know, and it was this dirty little secret.

So a lot of times, you know, with that also, guilt and shame is accompanied with that because it is a cycle. You know, you pick, you see what you've done. So now you feel embarrassed about what you've done. And it's this shameful secret, but you don't want anybody to know. Okay, typically when you do it, you do it in the privacy of your own home. for me my place of choice was my bedroom okay so you know what i started doing was to help myself is okay removing myself from the bedroom okay um sitting more out more so in the living room more so where it's like out in the open you know instead of coming into the bedroom just because the bedroom

is my my safe space you know it's where all my creature comforts and things are you know But having to change that and get out of it. And then also realizing that by doing hypnosis, using hypnotherapy as a way to rewire the brain and to really, really combat the urge, to compulsion to be of pulling, mainly that came around with giving people, showing people awareness. Because many times when you're pulling, you may be aware. It's a mixed bag sometimes. Some people pull and they are aware of it. Some people may not be and they're just mindfully pulled it. Usually it's a mixed bag, but bringing it to someone's attention that, okay, that they're aware of it

and that they can make healthier choices with their hands. They don't have to resort to that behavior. So by putting that into like hypnotic suggestions and using imagery so they can kind of imagine or visualize, you know, different things. It goes a long way. Now it doesn't happen overnight. This process, it is a gradual process. It takes anywhere from eight to 12 sessions to see full transformation, a transformative experience. You usually do start to see an internal change, though, right around four or five sessions. But I have a way of quickening that. And what happens is in the beginning when the is telling me what they're going through, I do not record that. But as we get into the

induction and I'm doing the entire, the session that last 25 minutes or 30 minutes of the session when the person is actually in hypnosis and I am saying hypnotic imagery and deep and hypnotic suggestion, that's the piece of it that I do record. And based on what the person you know what like to do i can give i give them that recording and then they play that nightly or at the minimum four to five nights out of the week they will play that over and over okay and then what happens is because what it does it literally rewires the mind hypnosis creates new neuro pathways in the mind and that's how hypnotherapists like myself are able to go in and change, you know, negative thought patterns, you know, critical self-taught that we have internalized within ourselves.

So basically, from a therapist's perspective, they will call that distortions, okay? From my perspective, as a therapist, we call those known associations. And basically, they're the same, just different terms, different words used to describe the same thing. And really, it's really just what you've come to identify as you, what you've grown up with. And what happens is when this happens, see, from the time we are zero, up until eight years old, we're all pretty suggestible, okay? Right around eight, you start taking in programming, okay? You start taking in all that programming. And mind you also, the subconscious mind makes an 88% of the mind, okay?

At least, 88%. And then you have the waking state, okay, which is where we are now, which is responsible for logic, being able to analyze things, decision making, that type of thing where we are now. That's about 12% of the mind. So when you go to a therapist and they're doing talk therapy, they're working more so with that waking seat, that 12%, I work with the 88%. So when you hear or on TV, we all see or hear the hypnotherapist kind of doing that countdown back to like

five, four, three, two, one, and then deep sleep, okay, but that snap, that deep sleep. Half the audience just passed out. Yeah, well, you know what it is? Here's the thing. Yeah. Deep sleep is not actually a real deep sleep. What that is is a trigger to this subconscious mind, okay? You are actually aware.

You may be very relaxed. Your eyes are closed. You're in a very relaxed state. But you are aware, okay, of what's going on. So that dispels the myth of you cannot go unconscious and hypnosis. It's impossible because you are aware. You're very relaxed. You feel more so like.

You know, when you get ready to go to sleep, but your head drops, like, and then you, you know, you take that type of thing. Yeah, like that. That's kind of like the way you feel, you know. But when you come out of it, usually people on the drowsy side, I ask them if afterwards, if they can go take at least maybe like a 40 minute nap because you need it. You're sleepy. You're sleepy. You know, I have people to make sure they have some water or something next to them. So by drinking, it kind of brings people back to themselves, you know.

So, you know, after, I mean, like not listening to the recording is while driving is recommended, you know, because you don't want to fall asleep. And also not driving quickly after you listen to the recording, okay? You want to make sure that you're kind of, have a chance to kind of come back to yourself. But kind of long wind, it's so sorry about that. No, that's okay. But that's how I got to it. Yeah, but to reinforce what you're saying, too, again, this is all hard science. So in the, once again, the historical dream literature I've been republishing,

there are famous experiments where a guy was like, well, I want to know if experiences during sleep, when I'm out like a light and REM and snoring all that, I want to know if physical experiences I have as a sleeper show up in my dreams. And he did experiments. He had, you know, Confederates or his assistance tickle his feet with a feather to see if it would up in his dream and he reported a specific event they held a hot water bottle close to his feet i don't know why he's he had a thing for feet i guess i'm just realizing that but uh but they also like tickled i think no maybe they tickled his nose with the feather something like that but they

held a hot water bottle near his feet not touching and he reported dreaming that he had um been captured by thieves and they were torturing him by by putting a hot poker on his foot i mean so someone whispered a word in his ear and he was able to say that he did have some kind of an experience of hearing that word. So that word, if you put on, you put on, you, you are able to intake hypnotic suggestion in sleep, it's an absolutely, it's absolutely a real thing. And you might even, it might even affect your dreams, too. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Hypnosis, you know, we do, in terms with hypnotherapy, we do work with dreams, you know, as well when it comes to that. And in fact, actually, sometimes after hypnosis, you will have something kind of, we call them venting dreams, okay, where you may start to dream about what we discussed, okay? And basically, we look at that as your mind now releasing it. So we call them venting, like early morning, like venting dreams. They may happen early morning. but basically you are now beginning to release all of that that was in you that we've kind of

worked through you're now dreaming and kind of venting that out definitely because that is my conception of dreaming is that I say the the lungs breathe the heart beats and the brain thinks and it the brain thinks whether you're asleep or awake just like those other automatic systems and what do we do on night long what our dreams were processing information sometimes we're sometimes we're just having a fun adventure because we like fantasy that's fine yeah sometimes time but very often it is related to here's what I've been through here's what how I feel here's what I need to put some thought into and try and determine what do I do about this situation or what what struggles or problems am I dealing with I've had a very interesting

phenomenon we'll just just swing in that for two seconds over the past so I said I was writing a book I don't know if I got it in that oh yeah I probably put that's probably the clip I put at the beginning but something like this is a book I've had in my mind for about 30 years the basic idea of it and the last few weeks i've been doing it like 10 to 12 hours a day i just sit and write and talk to the uh i i assistant so that it can like a dictation capture machine i just tell it my ideas and anyway long story short i've got now an entire fantasy world multiple characters plot lines i got all this stuff oh yeah well it's actually it's better than that this it was an idea, don't steal this.

This is mine. I won't. Not you. Not you. Not you. Not you. But I've had an idea of, you know, a sci-fi fantasy crossover where there's a, there's a genre of Japanese anime called Isakai. It just means other world.

So it's people from our world pop into a fantasy world. Like, well, what if someone from a futuristic sci-fi world popped into a medieval fantasy world? How would science and magic connect? And come to. You always got to do your market research. There's a point to this. I'm going to get to it, I swear. But in the market research, there is literally one other person who has ever released an idea even close to mine.

I mean, we've always had the idea of, I think the Isakai novel goes back before, what's his name, the mustache guy, a Connecticut Yankee and King Arthur's Court, Mark Twain, Mark Twain, I think. Okay, okay. That's an Isakai. It's an engineer from modern, and he goes back. few hundred years and now is ta-da so they time travelish but but a fantasy story nonetheless okay long story short on all this I swear there's a point I have been awakened and unable to go back to sleep because I have ideas and I keep I keep a notepad by my bed so I went to bed at like midnight last night to get ready to talk to you because I need like three hours to wake up so I woke up

four and a half hours later with my brain bursting I needed to get ideas out and I could not fall. I wrote them down and I still could not fall back to sleep. I'm like, I'm up. Let's do this. And right up to the moment, you and I started talking today, that is what I was doing since 4.30 in the morning. That is happening more and more lately. Now, that's unusual for me. I'm usually out like a light, eight hours, whatever. You know, sometimes it takes an alarm to get me up. Sometimes I wake up a little before the alarm, that kind of thing, which is interesting. You'll notice that as out there in the audience. If you set an alarm, sometimes you'll wake up three minutes, two minutes ahead of time. How does your body, how does your body know that? It just does. You can

You can train that as well. Long story. I'm going to stop. I've talked long enough. And I'll throw it back to you, the idea of your brain bursting with ideas being an impediment to sleep perhaps or all kinds. There's all kinds of directions to go with that. Yeah. It's funny.

You mentioned that about, well, yours, I think, so yours is more or less like a time travel. I actually, you know, actually started working on something that's similar but not quite like yours. Mine has, I've always had a fascination when it has come to parallel universes. Always have had that fascination. You know, the thought that, you know, the many worlds theory, okay? The thought that, you know, there is me here and this one and then me here and yet these different worlds or universes are literally very close to our own and kind of move like this. like, you know, really like, like, you know, kind of like that. And every now and again, something of collide, okay?

And, you know, it like, it won't, it won't make sense to be like, okay, wait a minute, that's weird, okay? But yet then quickly, you know, it's over and you're kind of back, you know, like I remember, and I don't know if this is true or if this was, I read this, but I don't necessarily know if this was a true story or not. But I remember I read this one. It was a gentleman. and he had gone to bed and he woke up and everything looked the same and then he happened to go to McDonald's

like he normally does okay and he noticed that things were different okay they didn't take the same kind of money that we did okay there was like a card or it was something that they used you know for money okay and there were a couple other items

that they didn't have on that particular menu which were all raised there you know and then all of a sudden he goes back to sleep that night and uh just like that he's back you know he goes to mcdonald's the next day gets ready to order notices that now the card that he had because he was going to give that card it doesn't work he's now back in his own time and he goes to look at it and that piece that card that piece of currency that they used in that world has now faded it's no longer there now again i don't know if this is sure or not he was it was written in a story i happened to read it i don't know if it was an actual a true you know detailed

account of something that this gentleman actually experienced but it was it is kind of like a cool spin on it though like wow okay the fact that you know there is another world that is right by this one and in this one i'm doing something else like everything that you want to do like in this other world i may be doing that or i could not even exist in that world you know what i mean so you know um it's it's pretty cool so something just occurred to me and you're free to use this if you want to i'm just throwing it out there this is not proprietary it's not in my story but i've always wondered about what uh in other words not going to come to me deja vu oh i've always what a lot of us are fascinated by that because it's it's a it's a physical sensation you know i just

felt something and it's weird and there's people theorized your brain fires twice in rapid succession so you get this kind of resonant double double feeling that's why they call it doubling you know like or like I've done this before I've been but if there's if we apply a different standard to it and say we got a multiverse theory and there are infinite multiverses and among those there are infinite versions of myself that had a meeting with you today at 11 a.m. and that each path splits sort of as I make different choices did I wait five more minutes to get out of bed I'm still ending up in this chair talking to you but there's a slightly different path

that I put more or less cream in my coffee a million variations and it just occurred to me what if deja vu is the feeling of two parallel worlds that are close enough briefly touching before they split off again and we just get that harmonic resonance that only happens when they're close, and we go, ooh, deja vu. I don't know. That just popped into my head. May you could throw that in your story if you want or do whatever you want with it, or I'll just be a nugget sitting in the back of my brain.

I love those fantastical explanations. Can I prove that? No, but it's interesting. Yeah. Well, well, actually, you know, it's funny that you're bringing up deja, deja vu, because actually in the Bible, you know, It speaks to, like in John 14th chapter 26 verse in the NIV version of Holy Spirit will teach you that all things, you know, and will remind you of things, you have everything I have said to you. You know, people with strong intuition sometimes will maybe experience that, like a spiritual reminder or like prophetic, you know, foreshadowing, you know.

And Joe, you know, it says, you know, for God speaks in dreams, in visions of the night to turn them from wrongdoing and to keep them wrong. You know, so while it does specifically talk about deja vu, it talks about that. Also, the thing of it is, is that time is our construct. Okay. Okay. Time is ours what we have here. But if you're talking biblically, okay, in heaven, there's no time. There's no time. Time is a manmate. It's here. Okay. But there it isn't. So what I have kind of been taught is that, okay, when you feel those moments, just like you say you have those different pathways, I've told that's kind of like God restarting that. Okay. Like I don't want you to go down this way. Perhaps something might happen to you. So I'm going to remove you and we're going to start your day over. Okay. We're going to keep you from that. Okay. We're going to restart it because again, we're, we're going to restart it because again, we

have time okay the universe is just you know that's our man-made thing is time okay but you know time is different actually there is a country i don't remember the name but i remember reading about it um where it is a small country it's surrounded by water i think but there is no time like they you know like it's you know uh during the in fact i think um it's one of these places where um kind of like the days go longer, okay, you know, in the nights, in the wintertime or longer, or it can be two in the morning, but it's still kind of like daylight if you're experiencing that. It's not Alaska. I know in Alaska, it happens like that as well in terms of the time, but also 30 days of daylight.

Yeah, days of day, exactly. So with something like that, so the people who live there, they don't really have time. they don't have time you know so i was like okay that's that's pretty gnarly that's pretty cool that's pretty cool yeah speaking of stories and the concept of 30 days a night if you haven't seen that movie it's a really i did see it i like vampire movie i love i love high concepts like that it's like wait a minute there's a place where it's night time for 30 days guess who would go yes damn vampires vampires you know they would and then there's yeah there's no daylight coming to save you that's an extra layer i love a well executed high concept that's why i don't want to

disappoint. That's why I'm glad I waited 30 years to write my book because I'm like, I wasn't ready. I absolutely wasn't ready 30 years ago. But now with the technology, especially if I didn't have GROC as an AI assistant, I couldn't do any of this. I know. Isn't it amazing? I like it. I like to put my ideas down on paper and then, you know, kind of I've been using something called synthetic AI. Okay. And I like the way I've been kind of like putting my ideas down on paper and then transferring them there and seeing how they kind of pull everything like my entire outline that I've done, you know, then it will help to kind of pull it into perspective, like, okay, that's a way that that's what I would like

to say. Like, that's it. I love it. I enjoy it. We were talking a lot about me, but the writing process in general, what I've needed all these years was I would get stuck in being unable to organize it i'm not i've got i've got the uh the touch of the aspi on that side of more than a touch where i just that executive function is is is for organizing is just it's a struggle it's not that i can't it is really hard it takes time yeah like real process and think about it yeah here's the stymie me was okay you got a fantasy novel you have a magic system how does it work and it needs to be internally consistent so that at the beginning of book one it works one way and at the end of book seven it still works the same way and you haven't violated

the rules with any cheats or anything because nothing will throw a reader or a or a viewer out of the moment faster than going magic doesn't do that you already established that rule what are you doing and then they're right now this is just what are we doing here this yeah it feels like what yeah like what's that right so so i'll start talking to the i and i'll say okay let's have uh the captain planet style let's have five uh powers and it's earth air water fire and heart beautiful and in the a i'll go locked in what he got for me i'm like well let's let's let's now let's play with that and see the permutations today i was doing a conversation of like we've gotten down to world building of okay we've got

this guy he lives in this place it's run by this political system this ethos there's these kinds of guilds and the guilds are all full of specialists in different kinds of magic and it's keeping track of this and then i'll get down to the end everything and i'll say ask me questions tell me where it where I contradicted myself and I'll say here's something you could go either way what do you want to do I didn't even think of that I would have had to go back and read the whole thing read it for me but then also I'll go okay lock that in and give me a an outline or flow sheet of how magic works in this world and it does it takes it brings it all together in like five seconds I couldn't do that couldn't do it right and then I'll go wait a minute I don't like how this works what if we change this rule how does that affect the system and it'll go oh that would break the system do you want to rewrite it I'm like no let's not do that let's try something else right yeah just those in the moment and it's talking to me and i'm talking to it i'm out here pacing while my phone's talking to me i love asking me questions it's amazing and i i'd say a year ago i talked to a guy who i've always been

a bit of a i i'm going to destroy the world uh sky net style i'm a child of the 80s i grew up on yeah yeah me too we don't want to give robots thinking power and that we're along actually a long way off from that. I think the first artificial general intelligence capable of interacting as if it were a person, not just a large language model. I think that's a fully sentient artificial person is decades away. It's actually

a lot more complicated than people think. The brain is not, and of course, humans are more than just gray matter with the soul and whatnot. There's something else animating us. Long story short on that. This guy I interviewed, he said, don't worry about that. That's not going to happen. And now I agree with it. But at the

time I was skeptical and he said actually the way things are going to go and he was right and you can go back and watch that episode he said the future is or the near future is going to belong to people who learn how to integrate AI into their projects and it's not you know this this tool I'm using is not writing the book for me it's not coming up with the ideas I'm telling right it's what it's an assistant it's like if I had another person here to write things down for me it just does it faster it remembers more right now I'm going to stop there I've talked I've talked way too long, but I'm going to throw that back. I can always come up with something more to say.

But you've been using a similar type of assistant to help organize? Yeah, yeah, it helps me. It even helps me in terms of when I am writing my scripts and things like that for my clients. So typically what I'm able to do is I take my notes, okay? I don't put like the client's name or anything, you know, into it because you just never know, you know, but I don't put anyone's name, but I will write down in terms of, you know, okay, experiencing this, I want to be able to help that person to release and remove strong urges, you know, pertaining to hair pulling or strong urges pertaining to hair pulling or strong urges pertaining to. to smoking or release and remove strong feelings of fear or phobia, especially with phobias because the difference between fear or phobia's fear is actually based on something that

has happened to you. A phobia, there's no logic, you know, based on why you have it. Fobias, it just pops up. It's sometimes you just pops up. Disgust response or fear response. And a lot of those are deeply rooted, I would say, in like, what they used to call atavism or racial memory. And they meant the human race mostly or races of pockets of people.

It's like it's almost like hard-coded DNA from the experience all of your ancestors had through a certain period of time. And then you get this. And there were people even theorizing in Darwin's day that the reason we got dreams about flying is that part of our DNA, our very genetic code, remembers when we were fish before we crawled out of the ocean. I see what you're saying. So that's one theory to explain flying dreams.

I think it also is just, you know, we can imagine we've jumped and we've, we've had all kinds of experiences of near weightlessness floating in water and whatnot and so like, what if I could fly like a bird. And so some dreams are just wish fulfillment. And certainly it's been related to the idea of wishing, wishing to be free of something or feeling that you are free of something. You know, you just graduated school. You don't have to go back. Flying dream. Triumphant success. Yeah, yeah.

Exactly. Yeah. But that makes sense, though, because actually in all of my dreams, I can fly. In all of my dreams, I can always fly. In every dream that I have, I literally, I can take off or just, woo, or just fly. Oh, yeah. When they say, you know, what superpower would you want, like, invisibility or flying? Oh, flying.

I don't need to be invisible. Yeah. I'm already invisible. I stay home. I just want to fly. Just give me that gift. I can do that. Yeah.

Yep. Well, speaking of dreams, do you feel it's a good time to transition? Yeah, yeah, absolutely, absolutely. Benjamin the Dream Wizard wants to help you. Here's the veil of night and shine the light of understanding upon the mystery of dreams. Every episode of his Dreams program features real dreamers gifted with rare insight into their nocturnal visions. New Dreams episodes appear every week on. YouTube, Rumble, Odyssey, and other video hosting platforms, as well as free audiobooks, exploring the psychological principles which inform our dream experience, and much, much more.

To join The Wizard as a guest, reach out across more than a dozen social media platforms, and through the contact page at Benjamin the Dream Wizard.com, where you will also find the wizard's growing catalog of historical dream literature available on Amazon, documenting the wisdom and wonder of exploration into the world of dreams over the past 2,000 years. That's Benjamin the Dream Wizard on YouTube and at Benjamin the Dream Wizard.com. The sleeper has awakened. I have two, okay, the first dream, because we were just talking about flying. So in part of this dream, I was flying.

So many years ago, okay, I want to say actually probably in like the 90s probably, like mid to like late 90s, late 90s. And I remember I had this dream that I was fighting, like there was this thing. It kept chasing me, okay? And I kept flying through these doors. And the thing was like hot on my trail. Now it looked like for a. And for anybody that remembered the golden child back in day, Dave, Eddie Murphy. The best, Eddie Murphy.

Yeah. All hands down, all time. And the, the demon Sodom Doomsy. Like when he, when he, when he was chasing the golden child and this thing like erupted into this skeletal thing, it looked like really evil, like this whole demon thing. That particular thing was chasing. me. Now, mind you, I hadn't seen the Golden Child in many, many years, okay? But this thing was chasing me. And I would keep having to go through these doors. I'd be flying, okay? But I had the power to fly and I was able to push open, you know, the door and fly through the door, go

through the door. But this thing kept coming on my trail. I could not shake it. And then all of a sudden, I flew and I got into this white room and I mean it was wall to all white like no doors like just everything was white okay and I heard this voice okay I'm incorporating it or saying that it was God that's what I think okay because I heard this voice and it told me you can't run from this you have to fight you have to fight it head on this is not something you can't can run from you have to face it and I was given this stick almost like a staff if you will and when the thing came through I started fighting back I started fighting back and I ended up you know killing it okay and just at that moment the scene changed like in an instant you know how in dreams

it seems changed very quickly and just like that I was in a Catholic church Okay. And there was the, you know, the altar and everything up above. And it was a long, we're walking up and it, but it wasn't walking by myself. It was myself. And then there was a, there was a child in the middle. But there was another child on the other opposite end of me. And we were protectors. I didn't know the other child walked on the other side. You were protecting the child in the middle. Okay. I was one protector. The other one was another protector. But she was in a form of a child. But I knew she wasn't one. I knew she was an angel of some, I knew she was. But it's just that she was in a childlike body. I want to say that she was probably a look like she was about maybe 10 years old. Okay. And she had long kind of like dark hair, okay? Like brown hair. Okay. And we were both walking together. and this child was in between us, and everyone was clapping. There were people, you know, in the pews, and as we're walking forward, everyone was congratulating me for destroying this beast. And then we got all the way up to the altar, and we delivered the child, and there was a nun that was there.

And she said to me, you have won what did she say she said you have won the fight but not the war she said you've won the fight but not the war and then she said stand behind thy soul and i never forgot that and at first i was like did she say stand behind thy own or stand behind thy soul but as things became clearer she said stand behind thy soul she said you've won the fight but you haven't won the war and then she said stand behind thy soul and the dream ended boom just like that and then i had a continuation of that dream because when that dream ended the first what i just talked about when i killed this beast it told me that it would be back okay um which tracks because in the

dream the nun said to me that I'd want, you know, the fight, but not the war. So months later, even potentially even a year or two later, I had almost like a continuation dream. And in this dream, I was at home and I grew up in a household with my maternal grandparents. And I had a cousin of mine who lived with me for about about six years. And in the this dream, it was near the holiday time, okay? I want to say like Christmas, Thanksgiving, Christmas, right around this time. And we had lived, I was living still in my childhood home, which I grew up in, which was in Ewing Township, New Jersey. And I remember there was this knock at the front door. And I immediately, it was like when I heard the knock, I knew exactly

who it was like instantly I knew who it was and I remember I kept trying to tell my mom okay don't open the door don't open the door I was like my cousin my mom I was like don't open the door and my cousin at the time opened the door anyway and there was a very pale child looks like probably adolescent about maybe like 13 14 years old and he had bright red hair okay and he wore red pants and he had a black shirt on and his eyes were redish okay and i ran to the big to the top front i my mom i said don't invite him in i didn't want him to come in in fact i'd said not to open the door where my cousin they got there ahead of me and they opened the door and i didn't want to invite him in and my mom was there and she said something like don't be silly

that's rude invite him in and said to this boy oh you can come on in okay because she said i was being rude and i remember it it looked to me because i don't think that it was um i could sense that it was evil i could sense it was evil and it looked at me and it told me i told you i would be back and then the dream ended just like that so those are my two dreams oh yeah all right well that's great we got a

you know at least two acts and then the third act is now how do you fight it again or right that kind of a thing but that it isn't very often

that I get dreams where they're connected like that over a series of times right nothing wrong with it I think we can handle them both sometimes we've run out of time but

just in terms of like if it takes a long time to do one dream that said i've gone as short as 45 minutes i've gone as long as four and a half hours but i'm not going to keep you that one today i promise because she actually had three dreams in the same night that we're all connected longest episode every day we took breaks it was so i think we even paused and came back at second day or something i'm like i'm out of time but you want to keep going she's like yeah i'll come back and something like that um so it's not at all uncommon that will

experience a physical phenomenon like i watched a movie and now we've got a visual representation saved in our memory and we look at it like well that thing behaved evil looked evil it had a scary claymation the whole claymation thing really made it an additional level of not human creepy weirdness i'd remember that movie i'm gonna watch that again that's a great yeah the cold a child yeah yeah yeah action adventure comedy it just doesn't uh it doesn't get better um in my opinion be it ever so humble and correct uh but uh so does it mean it's related to the movie itself any of the events of the movie not necessarily but it did give you a little bit of the framing of that of like you know this creature and i don't remember what it was in the story

exactly he wanted to eat his soul or something i mean he wanted to kill him he wanted to kill him because uh he wanted the golden child and he was coming after eddie because eddie uh was protecting him but it was something in the golden child that could kill him you know was it was a threat It was a threat. Yeah, exactly. So now that theme might have worked into the story or it might just be that idea of, how old were you at the time, would you say? I was easily in my 30s, yeah, 30s or 40s.

Like I was an adult, you know, when I had that dream. Yeah, I probably like 40s, early 40s, but I was definitely an adult when I had that dream. Okay, so you're calling back, but were you a child in the dream? No, I was an adult. I was a full adult, yeah. Put IRL and dream. Here we go. 30s.

Yeah, because that would be, so in the, it's, so you're not putting yourself exactly into the movie script of like, you're protecting a child in the opening sequence. There was a child that you were protecting. Right. in the second sequence. Right, right. But you were sharing that responsibility with a kind of mirrored partner that was also a child.

So there's definitely a lot of dynamics of being a protector. It can be your child. It could be children in general. It could be the, you know, the threat of an evil world to the two children in general. It can be that part of the qualities of what needed to. mirror you as an adult was a childlike approach to something. It can reference things you learned in the past or things you had observed currently. So we're going all kinds of different places with that. But I wanted to start with, so this is what I do. I try and put myself inside your

head. What are you seeing? And I'm going to try and see it too. And then we'll try and because I've had the completely wrong conception of some things. And I try and clarify it. And they go, no, no, it's like this. I'm like, oh, thank God. Now I see what you see. I wasn't seeing at all. So if we start with the very first sequence of flying through doors, what was the, what kind of buildings were they in? Was it an endless series of hallways or? No, it was like I, like it was like literally like a traditional, like a brown door. And I would have, I would kick the door open and kind of go through the door, you know. So I wasn't, I guess, kind of going through the door like that.

I would open up the door and I would go through that door and into another room. And I was continuously being, seeing these doors. Okay. And continuously going through them trying to escape this thing. But it was like hot on my trail. Yeah, yeah. So were you, were you flying the entire time? I was, well, I was flying.

Yeah. I was flying. So you would, you were off the ground. So there's something about whatever flight means to you that's, it's very interesting. So what you're describing, chased by a monster, typical dream, classic example. Yeah. Referenced over and over again in every single book I republished because these are common dreams and people like, why? Well, the boogeman dream is what they call it.

And it's typically associated with a feeling of slow motion. Like you're unable to, either your body lacks the energy to push yourself or to take steps and get away fat. you are incapable of running or you feel as if you're and very often there'll be a visual representation of my feet were stuck in quick sand molasses concrete things things like that to show your um and then that's very much tied in uh with i feel a threat is looming in on me and there's any number from way back in cave mend days i might get eaten by a tiger or the we don't have enough food to get through the winter it threats can be anything it's anything that might disrupt your, certainly your physical safety, your social standing, your economic ability

to put food on the table, all kinds of different things. You might have a looming eviction or something. Some monsters you can't run away from, I don't have any money. It's happening. Right, right. So in this one, you've actually gifted yourself this power of flight, but you're not able to utilize it fully. Right.

You're meeting a repeated series of barriers that can be, like you're not finding doors locked. you just have to stop and take the time to open them. And that's not freedom. You've got to go through the next room. And at least you're able to fly better. You're actually showing yourself that, so if we consider flight something along the lines of self-confidence or competence, you're meeting repeated obstructions to escaping some kind of impending doom that you feel is right on your heels.

It wants to hurt you. And you've put it in the body of. this iconic representation from a fantastic movie which so it could have been any kind of demon it could have been from a different it could have been hellraiser pinhead you know right right that but then it also it would have been pinhead probably if you were thinking about something else so golden child's a good way to go with this too because there's other themes of that movie certainly the idea that the child represents hope and that he has some kind of magic power as well and that he's um that he has a protector. So there's themes of that. You're bringing

into here and you're like, oh, well, the villain would obviously look like the demon because that's perfect. So what are we got? We've got ability or capability. What are the words I use this? Damn it. I talked too much and didn't write any of it down. Jesus.

And these are just doors in like a house, like a regular residential house and office building. I was more so I was it wasn't it wasn't a house I don't know if it was a

warehouse, whatever was it was vast, you know, I wasn't outside, I was inside a structure okay, but it was almost like never ending because I kept coming up to these doors and having to open the door and go through the different doors

until I went through that last door and I ended up in that all stark white room. Any other features of the rooms you went through standout? Any objects that might have been there? No, there were no, chairs, tables completely empty. Completely empty. It's just the doors that I'm just going through the doors, just going through the doors. If you had to give it a rough estimate, did you go through 10 doors, 50 doors, 1,000 doors?

What did it feel like? It wasn't, it wasn't many as the 1,000. I want to say maybe I probably went through, let's see, one, two, three, four. I probably went through about a good six doors before I hit the room with the all white. Easily about a good, you know, six, five, six more close to six doors. Yeah, I'm not going to hold you to it. I don't think the number. If you told me, I distinctly remember it was exactly six.

We would focus on that. but this is that's enough to get the point across and enough to feel the threat of like wait oh good a door I can get oh no another door I'm oh I'm still not out no no no no no no no and he's on your heels it is built up the tension enough and when the tensions ratcheted to a certain point then they can you open the final door did anything happen before that last door to was the door different was was the closeness of the enemy approaching you know was he closer when you got to that last door than he was at the first door. No, no, it was the same proximity. He was gaining on me, okay? He was, he was gaining, but he wasn't like right behind me, you know? But he was close, you know, until I went through that last store and I had like, it looked about like seconds, you know, when I heard that message, okay, about you can't

run from this. You have to fight it. Yeah. And so, and immediately, I, I, I, gathered some towel some type of courage and you know a um a staff of some sort appeared in my hand you know for me to fight his being because i had nothing to fight where yeah so i think the purpose of it in that sense in the context of the dream was to give you enough of an idea of enough repetitions of the i'll run away that didn't work i'll run

way that didn't work and finally you go okay i can't run away so you get through that last door and it's like i got to make a stand there's some part of you yeah i take a stand yeah it's speaking back at that time um and then you uh are reporting something that a lot of people don't it's very it's very common to hear visuals and it's even common to have people say well i knew i had to make a stand how did you know i just knew and dream logic knowing is the same as seeing. None of it's happening. None of its tangent,

but none of it's made of molecules in the real world, like a solid tabletop. So knowing is this, but relatively fewer people will say I heard a voice. Now, hearing voices in dreams is very common too, but it does place it external to you.

And I've been toying with that notion of what to do with the idea of, well, I knew this is what it was versus I heard a voice say this is what it was. So, the idea of the white room so you had been in a something you said could have been like a warehouse not going to hold you that it's not saying oh this is about warehouses but some some kind of space with multiple doors fast like it was vast it was it was vast and i probably you could have kept running

through doors i could have kept going through doors that they keep kept appearing i could have wasn't going to help if right yeah it just yeah okay so it's distinctly different that the rest of the warehouse we'll call it that for lack of a better term not not the building you were in and it is interesting that you were inside there's there's this um restricted boundaries that you can't fly up there's a ceiling you can't fly to the sides there's walls so it's not like you're being chased through a forest where you're weaving through trees but you can go forever right you didn't you don't have the ability to fly up and so there's there's uh also the representation being shown to you of the space you're

moving through that there is no escape by flight there in a flight in the in the flying sense and in the running away sense right but that when you finally had crossed enough thresholds figuratively and literally in the dream sense um where you finally got the message okay running is not going to work. Right. And the scenery changed and it, and the change is vivid from rooms that are maybe less distinct, but, but, still rooms to, now this one is, you know, you didn't mention any colors for the

one. Now, this one is pure white. Pure white, stark white. Yeah, this is where I would start asking and I'll just go ahead and do it. Any associations with the color white? I mean, what does that mean to you in terms of, um, confronting monsters, having epiphanies that you need to change a tactic or behavior to overcome? I mean, I could see that.

I could definitely see where, you know, I never thought about it that way, but I could see that, you know, I could see that, you know, needing to be able to face maybe some things in my life, okay? And what you said about like blockages, you know, like maybe, and now that I'm thinking about it, I'm thinking about it from like a self-betterment perspective of wanting to do certain things, but there are these different blocks, some things that I have to do and overcome before I can get to do what I really want to do. Okay. So these blocks are showing up. and I keep having to go to these doors.

I keep running from exactly what it is instead of kind of saying like, okay, you know what? I just have to do this. I just got a knuckle down and just do it. There is no way out but through. Exactly. And, you know, I didn't hear that myself recently. Someone told me, I'm like, you know what?

You're right. I'm going to do it. Yeah, I, everything worked out just fine. Yeah, I think that could possibly, you know, be, you know, maybe what it was, you know, And this thing that's chasing me is symbolic of just, okay, this is something I've been needing to do for a long time or something I've needed to do, something that's ancient because remember something like that, it was ancient that was chasing me. So maybe it was something that was very old that I've been needing to do for a long time. And I've been putting it off, running it up, putting it off, putting it off. And now it was this to the point where, listen, you are going to have to do this, okay?

You can't run from this. The only way, you know, is through, like you said. So that does make sense. Yeah. And very often there's broad social constructions around the idea of, you know, dark or darkness and white. Yeah. It can be purity, but it can also be clarity.

It's if you think of it as a room where there's, there's no distractive. It's the clarity, a clarity of seeing a problem for what it is finally. So there's, I think there's something, because this is the, this is the place where the, the voice happened. It was waiting for you in this room in a sense. When you had finally become clear yourself about what the nature of the problem was and the fact that you weren't going to be able to get away from it, you said, okay, let's strip away distractions. Let's strip away pretty colors. Let's strip away furniture, whatever. And then you have that moment as well where you're like, okay, acceptance.

I'm going to have to fight. How do I fight? Well, you gave yourself a stick in the dream. You're like, I'd eat some kind of, you know, if you don't have an AR-15 for me, give me a, give me a ping-pong paddle, something, anything I could throw with this guy. Which would be kind of funny, ping-pong paddle. And as he gets closer, he shrinks and you just, that would have been, that's not what happened. But, yeah, so I'm thinking that's probably what the, you know, stark white.

I think it's no distractions, no noise, just pure, pure understanding. But that resonates with you. We can go with it. and also too i listened to your answer i asked you about the color white and what came out was you know if i think about it and the blockages maybe there's some self-improvement that i was needing to do yeah yeah because a lot of times we don't want to confront ourselves like yeah let me just do this another day yeah i do another door putting it off yeah and one of the things i you know i do tend to you know i've been working on it but

But, you know, procrastination, you know, kind of at some point is challenging. So, you know, and there are things, you know, in my life, you know, that I have put off, put off. You know, like, for example, for me, a big one has been, you know, education. It's been school, you know. So, you know, I got through the first portion of it. But I always had that dream of continuing on, you know, to becoming like a, getting a like a side D, which is a doctorate in psychology.

I had clinical psychology. You know, so, and, you know, as recently I kind of went back to school, you know, to accomplish, you know, continue on my academic journey to accomplish that goal, you know. But during that time when I had the dream, I had not done that yet. And, you know, I have been putting off returning

you know back to school to complete that piece of it to complete that for for years for years you know and i think that it was just something that was always kind of in a back of my mind okay like you know you are meant to do you know something else you're you know and in order to but in order to get to that level you are going to have to go back to school and continue your education in order to be able to get to that level of a site a sidi or doctorate in clinical psychology did this dream happen about the time you were looking at the need to move forward to education or no but it's something and i've always been in the back of my mind so in the back of my mind that has always i don't use this word haunted me but it has always been in the back of my mind and when i think about

and i you know when i think about it typically when i get though that that that that thought and it's like a repetitive thought. I know that that's something I'm meant to do. That's something I'm supposed to do. Fair enough. Okay. And I just never did it. It took me years to be able to want to get it.

I had no, I didn't have any desire. And then all of a sudden, about two or three years ago, all of a sudden I had this crazy energy to just gut punch and just continue on with my academic journey. And that's, you know, I'm looking at that as a blessing. because i'm i still have that now but back then when i had that dream i didn't have a desire to want to finish and continue you know my uh that academic uh motivation and drive is it is a big deal it's too it's yeah i might even know you should do something it makes logical sense but you yeah but you yeah but you know uh over the past few years like it just drive like it just drive i don't even know

it's just like it's just there and i'm so thankful for it because and i'm now capitalizing biased on and doing what I'm supposed to, but I should have done probably years ago. And I think also, too, what I'm thinking of now is, you know, um, um, for a long time, you know, um, uh, I, I thought and played with the idea, okay, like, okay, I should, we all, I think, I should be further along than where I am now.

I'm getting older. I should have completed this by now, you know, but, um, a few, um, years a couple years back i stopped thinking that way and i realized at that point i'm exactly where i'm supposed to be yeah i am exactly where i'm supposed to be because i now have the desire to do it now okay i didn't have a desire to do it then so i didn't have the desire to do it then then it wasn't really meant for me to do at that point that's that's a tough thing too now sometimes you got to be like if i had forced myself to do it then I would have done it poorly right and yeah I would have gotten through it maybe but right but I get the same thing out of it right and now I have a crazy drive

with it and now I feel that I'm in the right time right space right mindset to be able to handle it you know also you know also too during that time I think I still was going out and you know now my life is different you know as I mentioned a lot of I work from home you know my life is completely different. I'm a caregiver to my mom, you know. So my life is more settled now. Now I don't care about going to that club on a Saturday night. I could care less.

I don't miss it. Don't miss it at all. I don't miss it. I don't care less. Like, you know, I, you know, I don't mind going out. But my, the way I look at it is, is quite different now. You know, plans, if I had plans to go somewhere, even at dinner and, you know, the plans get canceled. I could care less. Yeah, I'll be all right. I'll find something else to do.

We'll try again. Yeah, I'm good. I'm super good. So my mindset is different now. I'm more settled now. I can appreciate it now, you know, and it makes more sense to me now. So now I think differently than what I did then. I used to kind of beat myself up about not continuing or not being where I thought I should be. I now have forgiven myself for that. And I don't think that way now. I now know, believe, accept, and understand that I am exactly where I am supposed to be. Oh, yeah. And that's a great transformation to the idea of, you know, the only reason to hang on to feelings of regret is the idea of using it for motivation to fix something. Right. You know, that doesn't mean you shouldn't feel bad about mistakes, but right. Yeah. The idea of, you know, hanging on in negative emotions like

that yeah it's not doing anybody any good no it beats it hurts you and once you've already got your motivation back you're like well i'm gonna worry about doing it i'm doing it i'm doing it i'm doing it yeah i'm actively doing it now i'm actively doing yeah let me uh let me beg uh for two minutes to run to the bathroom i just uh sure sure coffee this morning i don't know i don't know if you want to stay here and wait for me while i just run or if you do you want a five or ten minute break no um no i'm just going to go and put my shoes on i um i am did you stop recording already I'm just going to let it around. I'll cut it out.

Okay, okay, okay. No, I have another a podcast that I'm supposed to do at five. And in between that time, it is here at Eastern Standard Time is 38. So, four, I wanted to run to the liquor store. I did that yesterday. I got to have whiskey for my game streams, for sure.

Yeah, yeah, I have to go. I want to go because there's a wine that I like called Lifebine. It's more of like a low. no sugar keto type wine and tomorrow I'm going over one of my girlfriend's houses for Thanksgiving and I need to make sure that I get to the liquor store before they buy up all that wine because it seems very popular are you wanting enough time to run out and come back or no no no because I'm a wait because you're I'm just going to put my boots on because I'm thinking we'll probably be done by life for we'll go on another maybe 20 30 minutes tops yeah yeah that's that's

It's fine, but I'll have time because the liquor store is not far for me. So I have time to run out, grab my bottle, and come back and be back here by five. Yeah. Good deal. Okay. Then I'll keep it brief. I'll try and be back in about two minutes-ish. Okay.

And I'm going to put my boots on while you're doing that. Okay. Good deal. I'll see you in a minute. Okay. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, that's fine, Mom. That's fine. Just leave it like that. That's fine.

Good Yeah I know One of pretty bad Yep I'm a I'm a good time I'm going to show up some things

Good times Good times. Oh, bobobooy. Bobbooy. I'm P. P. P.

P. P. P. Thank you. Oh, boo-boo-boo-boo-boo-boo-boo. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Oh. Thank you. Awesome. And he said, if I were not ready to go now, you have a knife overshould. You are not stressed to go outside, it's told outside. Thank you.

We're going to be able to be. We're going to be. Oh, okay, who's the sound, right? Oh, thank you. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. I don't know if you know

in the 90s that he knows you can't have a friend and you know and so much you know a wish and she has a huge

and the and the opposite of this and you know you know to know so I'm saying

so I'm Thank you. All right. Hello. I'm accepting for everyone for everyone on there on here. Hello. We're back.

Here we go. I'm going to have to move this cat. He's been getting loves. I have a cat too. Ellie. Her name's Ellie. Oh, very nice. Yeah,

waiting for you to come back. I just fell down a little rabbit hole about the golden child. Looking that movie up again. I think I'm going to name this episode, Sardunumsi. I love it. And people are going to go, what? And I'm going to say, you're going to have to watch it to find out. And then some people like us are going to get it instantly.

They're going to go. I know where that's from Yeah Because it actually It works because it's part of our discussion And it's actually the demon from the movie So yeah It's the actual yeah demon from the movie yeah

That's what's your baby's name? This is Bubba A Bubba Hi My wife names all the cats She said he's a little Bubba baby boy I'm like yes he is We got him when he was a kitten of course

So he was so hungry She finds him in a bush She brought home all the straight cats in the neighborhood we just took them in and uh he was so hungry she he couldn't wait for her to tear open a little little uh packet of chicken to give him the chicken chunks and he was chewing on the plastic and cut his own and for a while he had a little swollen lip and he was yeah he was looking like baba gump from forest gump so she called him baba that's a great that's a great name so cute he's so lovable oh he's like he's like hey dad i want some pets in love i don't

I don't care that you're doing a podcast. It does not concern me. Right. Where's our timer here? 139. 0.1.39. All right. And we're back doing the thing.

I did want to pick, well, we got more to get through, but I'll try and pick up the pace, too, so we can get you out of here at a decent clip. It's, yeah, you're just all over it, aren't you? I call it value-added content. They're little disruptors. Of course, every wizard needs little familiars, too. I swear he's a reincarnated. dog he will chase he chase his hair ties and and he will bring bring them back for me to

throw again i love it amazing i've never had a cat that played fetch um okay so the next portion immediately following the realization taking action and prevailing you didn't show yourself defeated you showed yourself victorious right then places you in this church setting and from talking to you and getting to know you it seems like your faith has always been important to you um yeah more so i would say probably than the last um i'll say my walk you know my journey my walk with crisis probably started more within the past a year year and a half yeah year about year yeah but i've always been a believer but it has stronger now yeah i always have been believer yeah yeah so at the very least during this time you know i like to do the counterfactuals

you did not put yourself on the champions podium at a sporting event that's not what this is about And that's not where the source of your strength came from. It's, you know, you did not put yourself, you didn't launch into the air and fly off into another universe, leaving all your problems behind. You put yourself in the, in the church, walking down the aisle, it's full, and there's people clapping. So there's this, what immediately stood out to me was the idea that something about your defeat of the monster, you attribute it to your history with. the religion or the fact that it's been you learned some lesson from it or it's provided you some stability in your life and it's probably the reason you've come back around to it now at this age you're you're able to put those pieces together like this has served me well this provided

the well in a way the armor of god it was a stick but it was the uh you know the armor of god is in literal metal it's right although it can be too like if you need to put on metal but put on metal that armor yeah yeah exactly so at least it it gave you you know and you're you were also attributing that voice in that room to the voice of god of like yeah yeah i did turn around and face it not only that you've already got the weapon you've already got yeah what you need to to win this fight and you yeah yeah so you show yourself the you know in a way the epilogue in a sense of like let's make this formal let's show the my fellow believers who are also here for the same reason and that this is something in their life that gives them strength and has been a solace to them

or allowed them to prevail over demons in the past. And demons is a wonderful thing, too. Well, they're not. But it's a wonderful concept of the things which plague us and which bring us down and which causes misery, all of that stuff. So if you've got something like that chasing you down, you win, the fellow church, it's like they're patting you on the back. You know, definitely the applause.

Congratulations. A whole lot of add-a-girls. Exactly, exactly. validation of, you know, and a more direct symbolic representation as well of, I didn't just know it was the voice of God and I won and dream over. I put myself in church, having taken a victory lap in a way, but you're escorting, but there's also the more important, and tickle came out of nowhere. The more important thing is that, in essence, the victory beating the demon wasn't enough.

You have to escort the child. There's a reason the demon needs to be beaten. It's not just to save yourself or even if that child is you, in a sense. And I don't know that it is, but it may be the seed of something. Children very often represent the potential, what something can become. You know, it's extra sad when a child dies because they never had a chance to grow up. Grow up. Right.

So what you've got to do is actually, and this is something you've probably walk your faith. You've probably heard that before. You're literally walking your faith in a sense to. the altar. Wow. I didn't even think about that. That just resonate in a way. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because if you know, what would they say? God's waiting for you. He's, he's there. You just got to go. Yeah, he's, you got to come to him. Exactly. So you're bringing,

you're escorting this maybe a part of yourself, maybe a conceptual, um, uh, seed of something you need to do down the aisle. And you have a companion, a mirrored protector. Not only is it you protecting maybe a part of yourself, maybe a seed of a part of your personality or potential that needs to grow. But the mirror is not another adult and it's not

an angel in armor or whatever, not carrying a spear. It's another little girl. And you have the knowing that it's an angel. So there's this a partnership with angelic force. If a demon is

is following you, then an angel is helping you in that sense. I don't know if we're on to something there. If your brain's going a different direction. Yeah, no, no, no, that, that's like in line. Got it. Nice. Nice. I basically just ramble until something makes sense.

So that's what's your process? You were watching it. And then the child was delivered to the altar. And there was no specific description of what happened when he got there. know the ceremony other than the acknowledgement that you won the fight but not the war stand behind thy soul my soul exactly that was it stand behind thy soul yeah yeah and then where did that appear to come from or was it just that came from a nun that was a nun when i was inside the church when i got closer near the altar okay that's when i heard that that's what she she told

that to me she whispered that to me like stand behind thy soul okay she said you've won she said you've won you won the fight you have not won the war you know so and uh she was you know basically okay like gear up because you know you got more to come you know there's you know you know that type thing oh yeah it so we could say um the the the child you were escorting might have represented your notion of the soul, of your own soul. Like you have to escort it into the church. You've got to choose to be your own protector. Ooh.

You like that? Okay. Yeah. I like that. Oh, yeah. Your own protector. Yeah. And it's interesting because I have always felt within my heart that I am a protector.

Maybe it's because I was bullied as a child. So I grow, I've grown up, you know, where kind of like, I don't take S-H-R-T from anyone. Like, I don't. And it's not that I am aggressive or combative, but I learned very early on because of that, like setting and maintaining healthy boundaries. Or at the very least, like, I don't have to take this. I'm leaving. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't put up with it.

Yeah, I don't, yeah. And I don't mince my words. I'm very direct in what I want to say, you know. So, yeah, that makes that tracks. Very good, Benjamin. I love it when magic happens. And when I can see it on people's face, suddenly I'll say something I didn't know was going to be important. And someone goes, wait a minute, I'm going to go, that's it.

That's the moment. It's beautiful. Okay. And so, yeah, that's what led me to that is because you kind of put the words into the nun's mouth is, you know, you're going to have to walk this walk again. You're going to have to find another demon someday. Yeah. Don't worry. You've got angels by your side helping you protect your own soul, but you can bring it to the altar. Oh, look at that. I think that might be, I think, you know, I think perhaps that middle child, maybe that was. Maybe that was still like a part of me that still had to continue to grow. Okay. I still had to go on this journey. And, you know, the other one, like I said, I knew she was in a child's body, but I knew she was an angel. I knew she was. I could feel it. I knew she was. I knew she was.

and I think that's it. It's like, okay, here's me, like, where I am now and her there. And it's like, okay, this ain't like, I'm going to walk with you. I'm going to be with you. You know, yeah. Yeah. I love it. Now, we could, we could call it there and wrap up.

We can jump into the next one briefly or try and relate it to the second one. We can, we can do it briefly. it is 358 and I want to try to because I don't know what the line is going to look like when I get the liquor store because it's like the day before like it so it's four o'clock has come it's 358 four o'clock's coming up you need to go to you have an hour now to come back before yeah let's you know what let's let's wrap it up here I don't want to eat another 20 minutes in time listen listen I don't think that I'm going to be on that on the call that long I'll probably on there from like five to maybe something like 545 my time I'm perfectly okay with joining back with you. I don't mind. It's up to you. Unfortunately, I can't,

because I stream my video games at 5. m. Okay, gotcha, got to do that. Okay. Yeah, I want to give you plenty of,

yeah, but you know what, we can listen. We got something. It's 350, it's 359, you know, I can chat until like 405, you know,

and I can do that, you know, because I want to hear what you have to say about the other one. Well, why don't we do this. I'll ramble a little bit,

and you just kind of cut me off when you're like, that's, that's enough. I got to go. And that's fine. Okay. And this one we can handle a little briefly. Now we've kind of dialed in because you said it is connected.

So we've got an idea of what that first one was about. We're not going to copy, paste it on the other one. But now you're not being chased through a warehouse. It's coming to your front door. And you've put yourself in the back in your childhood, in a childhood home, surrounded by some of the same people. Your mom's there. Your cousin's there.

And you know immediately that. troubles come and knocking and you say do not let it in yeah your mom is saying let it in don't be rude your cousin opens the door so right these two family members and this is where I might get too personally might cut this anyway but there's something about lessons you learned from your mom about kindness hospitality some some don't be rude order or command internalized thing where you're looking at that as like wait a minute if i'm not a little rude if i don't say healthy boundaries if i don't keep that door closed there you go then i'm going i'm inviting that in exactly exactly and i don't know if your cousin used to get you into

trouble like when you were well we were i mean i mean in the beginning yeah when she first came to live with me she um she did she would do things like um literally she would um steal things for my mom and hide it in my drawer. And I would, you know, get in trouble for it until my mom realized kind of like what was going, what was happening. Like we would play those type of little dirty tricks back with each other because of course what I found out what she was doing. Then of course I started doing things back to her. You know, so we would go back and forth with that until, you know, we stopped, you know. But, but yeah. Definitely. And then there, So then this thing did get let in, and it had a very specific look to it.

It was very red-headed, red eyes, red hair, red pants, red pants, but a black shirt. Black shirt, yeah, black shirt. I was thinking, you were going to say red shirt, but no black shirt. Black shirt, yeah. I don't know where that. Everything red, but the torso area, I mean, there's the heart and lunger in their stomachs in there. Pale, pale skin. And if I'm not mistaken, I want to say there may have been like some like,

reddish, you know, like freckles or something, if I'm not mistaken. I'm thinking on it, but I think there might have been some freckles there, but I know the skin was, you know, pale, like a redhead, you know, redheads, yeah, for sure. And then there's also a redder. An iconic movie with a redhead and stepchild and he's literally in a little devil suit. That might have stuck with you. Because you're also conceptualizing this as, you know, it's your childhood. This is lessons learned in childhood.

Right. So there's something. Okay. During the first one, maybe you were beginning. to confront the notion that you're not everything you could be. And there's an interesting phenomenon that it's more real than matter. It's this concept of, you know, when you're falling short of your potential. And there's an emptiness, a void there that kind of stares at you like that Nietzschean abyss.

And it keeps coming back at you to finish because you have more work to do. In order for you to get to where you're supposed to be, you've got more work to do. need to get on it. Yeah. So you might have put that, that idea into the demon that's chasing you. And well, now it's back.

So something happened around the time of that second dream, I think, where you were thrown back to a childhood level conflict. Maybe it was you've got a bad person in your life and you're having a hard time cutting them off, something like that. But, you know,

I mean, that could be. But I, I mean, I, I'm trying to think back then. I don't know who. And that may not be it exactly.

It could be something else. Yeah, but it could be something. Yeah. But that is one of the things where like it's it's hard to be rude. So I'm trying to relate it to a person because it's the idea of the hospitality, the rudeness of letting things in that maybe you shouldn't out of right, out of a misguided sense of what's right or wrong in that scenario. It's okay to be rude to the demon.

You can tell them to go away and you don't have to feel bad about it. But there's a part of you that's like, you know, but mom said. Right, that good girl. Yes, good girl. Yeah, yeah. So there's probably something like where you're questioning, am I supposed to be a good girl here? Or is that going to, is good girl going to leave me vulnerable and get me into trouble? And I'll be right back into sacrificing.

And the devil that you let in was, I'll be back. You knew it was this. Yeah. You just knew it was the same guy, even in a different shape. It was in a different form, exactly. But the minute that I opened the door and I saw this. this being you know that was basically masquerading as a boy okay I knew that it wasn't I knew that it was the same thing that was chasing me before it just was in a different form yeah and change

form and this works a lot with reoccurring dreams too is that the same struggle will come back sometimes in the same visual representation crystallized iconography in a way or it will appear in different forms with the same scenario typically type of thing and this one it was uh rather being chased yet it it came to your house so i would say this is probably a scenario that was close to home in a sense um yeah and i don't know at what time you started caring for your mom or she started having problems where she needed care um it's related to that at all this i don't know well when i started uh with my mom i actually physically started i would say taking care from like around and my mom was diagnosed in 2014 so this happened like and then by 2016 she

and my grandmother because at the time I was caring for both my grandmother and my mom before my grandma passed on in 2020 so they both physically came to live with me the summer I want to say even like July of 2016 prior to that you know I would go back and forth you know to visit them and they would come stay with me for a couple weeks or two weeks at a time, you know, but as I started seeing the things deteriorating, because they were both literally going through a dementia at the same time. Wow. Okay.

It's just that one. That's good time. Yeah. Yeah. It's just that my grandmother, hers was a little bit more advanced, was more advanced my mom. So my grandma passed. She was 97. Wow.

So, yeah. So, you know, but yeah, at the time when they moved in, 2016 with me, I was caregiving for the both of them. And I'm an only child. So this was also something that was very, it was stressful. You know, I had no knowledge of in terms of taking care. And all of a sudden, bam, you're taking care of two people at the same time, your mom and your grandma.

Did the dream happen after that, after they moved in? The dream happened before that, actually, before that. Or at least one of them did anyway, I think. think uh yeah i know i know the the one with the the golden child that would happen for sure before yeah that one happened before yeah i was going to say it would make sense if um what what i have in my mind the idea that you've if if it happened after uh your mom moved in with or you moved in with her it would be the idea that she is now literally in your home which she was in the dream she's in there to be able to open the door or to uh and so letting people in even if there's a good reason

even if it's family and it's the right thing to do and we love them. We're still living with someone else who has maybe a different way of thinking about the world. And maybe also the real danger that a person with dementia might open the door to someone who could hurt you. Literally. Right. Right. Yeah. And literally.

Yeah. Yeah. So allowing not knowing. Not saying you need to go to a care home or a secure facility. I can't care for you. You are in a way knowingly, intentionally putting yourself at risk for a good reason. But also it creates a vulnerability of inviting trouble now if that happened if the dream happened afterwards that

would be more clear but it could also have been a not a prophetic dream but it definitely a forward thinking dream of what is my life going to be like if I allow these people to live with me what am I going to put myself at risk to what could come walking through that door that I wouldn't let in but someone else would right right right control maybe maybe something related to that and then it brought back these old struggles of boundaries like right how did he said a boundary with your mom's got dementia. You're a caregiver. It's like you do and you do do the best you can. But yeah, there's no, um, arguing with dementia. You can't say that now don't do that again dementia. Dementia says, screw you. I'm going to exactly. Right. Exactly. And I'm going to do the same thing

like in five minutes because I don't remember what I did five minutes ago. Yeah. That's a really tough part too. This is same same questions over and over and over again. Yeah. When I work and it happens dementia folks in the hospital there was an ethical struggle we we discussed the idea of so there's one old man and he was like you know when is my wife coming to visit well she passed she's not coming to visit yeah every time we told him he broke down into tears and after a while was just like reliving that yeah no why don't we just not tell him like we can't lie to patient no no no don't lie don't lie you're right you're right right right right you don't have to say you know when is she coming is like i don't know i don't know i'll go check yeah just just i don't know any way not to uh yeah

because maybe she'll come visit him in his sleep maybe he'll miss him and his sleep maybe he'll Meet her on the other side. Exactly. I think they'll be back to, so you're not lying exactly. Right, right. As Obi-1 canobie says from a particular point of view. But, yeah,

just traumatizing someone for no reason just because we're trying to satisfy our desire to be ethical. We're not telling him, oh, she's coming at five. Don't worry about it. Right. It's just like, I don't know. That's not right. That's not right.

I don't know. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know what's going to happen. I can check on. Or you can just say, I can check on that for you. We can go ask someone. Do you think she's coming?

No, no, she's not coming. Well, I just never got back to him and told him. Right, right. Yeah, if it's not going to do anything, it's not for a good, good purpose. But anyway, now I'm just, oh, we got this one is baby. Yep, that's her name. Her name is baby. She was named by our, my wife's niece, basically.

When she was three years old, she loved Justin Bieber. And she would sing the baby baby song. And then she looked at this cat when she was a kitten and said, baby. That's her name. Oh, that's her name. And we got another one who's old. She is ancient as the hills and her legs don't work and she's hiding somewhere.

She sleeps all day and then comes out when I open the can of food. Yeah. That's Ellie. That's her idea of a retirement, the good life. I sleep. Yeah. I poop when I want to. And that's it.

Probably. Yeah. Or I will hack up a air ball. I think sometimes she can't make it. I don't blame her legs don't work. Yeah. I'll just pick up the poop. Whatever.

She does that. Yeah. Ellie. Yeah, Ellie lips. I can, and I think it might be arthritis. She's over, she's over 15. That's same with ours. She's a senior baby.

Yeah. And she doesn't have the same spring in her jump. She climbs the bed. She doesn't jump on it. Yeah. Right. Yeah. That's the old girls.

And the hips go. And it's a thing. Yeah. She'll let us know when it's time. She'll just go to sleep and we won't see her again. And then nobody will be a, well, I'll be sad. She'll be fine. So yeah.

But, well, let's end this on a downer. Jesus. She's so cute. Oh, they are. They all want so much love. And I can't, I can't resist. Then their hair gets in my nose and they're all over my notes. Well, do you, we ate up about another 10 minutes, but you're still good to get out and do your

running errands. Yes, 4-11, so I'll probably do need to probably go now. Let's get back. And you feel satisfied with the answers as much as we could do. I do. You don't have any additional questions. I don't want to rush you out, you know. No, no, no, no, I'm fine.

This is fun. I liked this. I'd say that's the primary experience. It's never a waste of time, even if nobody ever watched this. No, it is fun. It's fun. It's really good. I enjoyed myself. Thank you.

Oh, well, I appreciate. Thank you for being here. I couldn't do this without people to tell me their dreams. I don't remember mine, so I'm a little jealous, but most of the time. Let's do this by way of exiting. This has been our guest streamer, Keisha Reynolds, out of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. I don't even remember if I said that last day, but now, you know, good deal. She is a, can't read my handwriting, certified clinical hypnotherapist, life coach, and the owner of three, two, one, deep sleep hypnotherapy.

you can find her at, of course, three, two, one, the numerals, the numbers, number three, number two, number three, two, number three, two, one, I'm going to say it again. Three, two, one, deep sleep.com. She's got a brand new book, Beyond the Habit, with a subtitle, I can never remember, but that's okay. For my part, would you kindly like, share, and subscribe? Always need more volunteer dreamers. I do video game streams Monday through Friday, 5 p.m. to 8 p.m. Pacific, most days of the week. This episode brought to you by O'Neuro Chronology, Volume 4, Prima, Relaquorum. the latest book in the augury bibliomancy and chaos series you can find all this and more at benjamin the dream wizard dot com and if you'd head on over to benjamin the dream wizard dot locals dot com i'd love to hear from you there um once again kisha thank you for your time and a fascinating conversation uh it's been good having you thank you thank you thanks for having me thank you all right and everybody out there thank you for listening we'll see you next time bye bye Thank you.