Drinking Wine and Talking Shit - Decoding Digital Desire: Pornography, Perception, and the Impact on Young Minds

Episode Date: March 15, 2025

🍷 Join Amy and Sadie on this week's episode of "Drinking Wine and Talking Shit" as they dive into the complex and often taboo topic of pornography and its impact on young minds. We're tackling the digital landscape, the psychology behind it, and how it shapes our understanding of sex and relationships. This is a sensitive subject, so please listen with care.🚨 Trigger Warning: This episode discusses sensitive topics that may be triggering for some listeners. We encourage you to prioritize your mental health. Resources are listed below.In this episode, we discuss:🖥️ The accessibility and prevalence of pornography in the digital age.🍷 Wine and the Why: Our robust Cabernet Sauvignon and dark chocolate-covered almonds pairing.🧠 The effects of early exposure to pornography on young minds, including distorted perceptions and desensitization.🎥 Documentaries and pop culture references like "The Social Dilemma," "Hot Girls Wanted," and "Euphoria."🗣️ Listener stories sharing real-world experiences with pornography.💬 How to navigate conversations about pornography with children and loved ones.🤝 Resources and support for those affected by pornography.🤔 Our "Would You Rather" segment, sparking thought-provoking discussions.Resources:"The Social Dilemma" (Netflix): https://www.netflix.com/title/81254224"Hot Girls Wanted" (Netflix): https://www.netflix.com/title/80026360"Euphoria" (HBO Max): https://www.hbo.com/euphoria(Add any additional resources for mental health support, addiction recovery, and healthy relationship education here.)Sensi Walters (Our Resident Counsellor, add contact info here)Connect with Us:👍 Like and subscribe for more honest conversations.💬 Leave a comment with your thoughts and questions.🔔 Turn on notifications to never miss an episode.Cheers to open conversations and navigating complex issues together! 🍷#Pornography #DigitalDesire #MentalHealth #Relationships #Podcast #DrinkingWineAndTalkingShit #OpenConversation #ListenerStories #Documentaries #PopCulture Find us on Instagram and Tiktok @DWTS_Shit. And you can follow @only_aamy & sadie.cubitt on Instagram too. Let's laugh with wine together!

Hello, hi everybody! Welcome back to Drinking Wine and Talking Shit. Today we're diving into a topic that's often whispered about but rarely discussed openly. Pornography! Yes, this is a tough one but it's crucial to address the impact it has on our society, especially on your minds. We're going to try to be as respectful and informative as possible. As always, we want to remind our listeners that this is a sensitive subject. If you find any part of this episode triggering, please know you are not alone. We'll include resources on our show notes and Sensi Walters. Our resident counsellor as always is available to our listeners. Okie dokie. So let's start with the facts then. Pornography is incredibly accessible.

It's everywhere online from dedicated websites to social media platforms. And the industry is massive. It's a multi-billion dollar, slash, pounds business that has adapted to the digital age, making it easier than ever to access a wide range of content. And it's not just traditional videos anymore. I mean... Was it ever? Yeah. We're talking about everything from amateur content to highly produced films and even virtual reality experiences. And let's not forget a little added snuff. Oh, a little?

Well, no, I'm just like, yeah. So, that's what we're going to be addressing today. But before we dive deep into it, let's hit, let's start how we normally do and go for the wine and the white. And as always, Sadie has got a corker for us. So what are we sipping on? Oh my God, if this is not a 10 out of 10 I'll be fucking fuming because I have got everything in it I like I can tell already. Yes right and it's a family meal you can make this at home for your family really really easily. Kaisel helped me make

it my three year old. So keep an eye out for the real on Instagram and TikTok and Facebook. So I made like a Spanish slash Greek version of a chicken, so I did a whole chicken, obviously on our plate we just have a bit of chicken and the kind of bits that went with it. So I did a whole chicken, I kind of salt and peppered it, oiled it a bit, normally I like to cover my chicken in butter and maybe even stuff a bit of butter down the skin if you've never done that give it a try because it makes it really moist. I then added feta cheese, chorizo and cherry tomatoes which makes a really nice sauce and then towards the end I added chickpeas and then I garnished it with some thyme because it goes really well and then I made that with a salad so you could also add some

potatoes or whatever but we're trying to be a bit healthier in our house so we're trying to lay off the carbs a tiny bit more. But the wine's fine. The wine I've chosen to go with it is an Asda Extra Special Pinot Grigio. Asda's extra special? It was £6.50. It was supposed to be £9 actually I got a deal but anyway oh maybe it was £8 I don't know it wasn't that expensive. So it looks really nice and we're actually quite enjoying it right now so let's try the the Spanish slash Greek chicken did I say feta cheese mmm don't think so oh I added feta cheese sorry it sounds lovely yeah and we're looking forward to trying it so we'll be right back after this taste test yes we will oh also before I

do that sorry it doesn't look great on there. We will show you properly on it. On the reel you'll see the full chicken and it's all its glory That I served to my family With my salad. Oh with the salad. Sorry. I also made which we've not got right now because I've eaten it all today So sorry about that Was a Sriracha salad dressing so I made it with Greek yogurt, because we're trying, again, we're trying to be really healthy, a Greek yogurt, lemon juice,

and sriracha sauce salad dressing, and it was banging. Did you get none of that? Did you get none of that? Yeah, I used the rest in a wrap today with some salad and cheese. So, give it a go. But it sounds lovely.

We'll be right back. Yeah, give it a go, Aims. Just whilst Amy finishes that, So but it sounds lovely we'll be right back yeah give it a go Aims. Just whilst Amy finishes that I just want to explain a little bit more um just just try and get my 10 out of 10 here um it was a one pot dish so it's a full chicken all this all the extras go on top and you cook it in for as long as the chicken allows uh on on your packet depending on the kg and like I say I made my salad and in my salad I just did like a bag of salad with tomatoes, cucumber and peppers but then I also add some flax seeds and chai seeds just because if you're trying to lose weight it's so good for your

digestive system. And it was the easiest meal to prepare. So Amy can you please give me my fucking 10 out of 10? I must I am gonna give you a 10 because not only have you made something that is straight off my street yeah it goes really well with the wine and I think sometimes people will say like with chicken or fish and like things you you have like a white wine in it anyway but I'm also not always a big fan of like chickpeas and stuff but the whole thing tasted really really nice including the wine and was it really easy to make so it like took me five minutes to put together and just have to wait for it to cook. Amazing. So I'll give her a ten. I just don't want to disappoint.

Although I would say... No give me an honest... No yeah I mean I would give her a 10. Just don't want to disappoint. Although I would say. Well no, give me an honest. No yeah, I mean I would give, I mean I just, I'm not a 10 person. Oh. 9.8. Well I'm never gonna fucking make it then. Only joking. 10, absolutely love the wine. Absolutely love. I'll stop fucking trying.

The food. So yeah, absolutely yummy. Thank you Sadie. And actually if it's all right, I might go for a little bit more so, you know me, Mente. right, I might go for a little bit more, so unimento. Oh, I'm just gonna. Okay, so after my fantastic 10, which I will take,

thank you very much. Big fat 10. 10 person. It's time to get serious. So let's drink a bit more wine and let's just start talking a bit of shit as per usual. Now obviously we know that early exposure to pornography can distort a young person's understanding of sex and relationships.

Absolutely. The unrealistic scenario is the lack of consent as well in some cases and often unattainable body standards can create a very warped view of reality. Although if I'm honest I actually think that porn, some body standards are actually very varied. I think they're quite good, yeah. I mean, that depends what you watch, but yeah, I'm not averse to porn, but I wouldn't want my child watching it at certain ages.

Do you know what I mean? And obviously the potential for desensitization is a massive concern for any parent, I guess, and for those of society that actually give a shit. Kids might start to normalise behaviours that are not healthy or consensual and I think it's very good at the minute that they are very much talking about what consent means in schools. I think that's such a good thing to talk about. And did you actually know That if people opt out of sex education,

oh I can't remember what it's called, it could be a sign that they are part of a... That they're sex pests. No, no, no. Pedos? No. I meant like, if parents opt out their children from sex education, it could mean that they are part of this type of,

oh I don't want to say cult, but like, oh it's going to bother me, I'm going to have to search it. So let's carry on, I will search as we chat. Let's do that, but can we just take a step back in terms of say porn on your free generally. Yeah, okay, let's go. So let's go back to kind of, you know, people's idea of porn or listeners idea of porn could just be at the end of the day if you're in a normal relationship and I'm sorry porn is part of probably one is that you know your partner might watch some of you might want to watch some together and that's okay. You know pornography isn't necessarily a bad thing but it needs to be something that is provided to people of the right age at the right time.

Of course. At the same time I think going back to the whole let's just start from the top of the start of the industry. Let's think about porn and the effects on probably women who are in the industry and things like that. Because for me, porn is very man-centric. And I know we talk a lot about men, but unfortunately that's the way the world is. And, you know. What a big hierarchy for a reason. It is. And I think that porn, the beginning of porn and how it all, you know, may have started, which obviously has been going on for centuries,

in one form or another, has always been, to me, and in my brain, more of a man-driven thing, something to make men happy. And I think later on in time, there has been pornography made for women. But I still feel, and when I see it now, or I still feel and when I see it now or you know I still feel that it is very driven towards the man enjoying it and not towards the woman enjoying it and I

think that's quite a harsh reality on porn because let's go back to teenagers watching it and thinking that's how we're supposed to have sex and it's not like teenage girls really access porn. I think they'd feel a bit away Watching but I think they'd be like, oh, because they're not sexually This they're probably sexually aware, but they're not probably ready to see that sort of sex They're probably ready to have the love of their life light candles and let them lose their virginity to them Yeah, girls want to be in love Yeah, of course of course and and and and you know that's that's

by the by I think yeah I think in terms of like when young people watch porn not just men but when you and people watch porn I think it gives them the wrong idea of what sex is supposed to be like so okay so obviously so do you think that porn is a bad thing? Not when, I think, certain types of porn can be a bad thing. 100%, like what? Aggressive porn, porn where the person or woman looks very, very, people or woman looks very, very young.

Or like they're not enjoying it. Or they're not enjoying it. So when I was younger, when I was like 17, I loved this porn star called Jenna Jamison. Now I didn't love her, my partner at the time did. It was a couple of years older than me. But when I look back now, because I was telling my partner about this person,

all of her porn was more around, not all of it, but a lot of it was more around the female. She was absolutely gorgeous, but all her porn polos had a storyline and they were like an actual thing that happened, like 90s porn. And if you've seen that film called, with Kevin Hart and Mark Wahlberg in, called, oh I can't remember what it's called, but anyway he's like on his me's. yeah, I know what you mean. And he's got the weekend to himself, he gets too much some porn and he's like 90s porn with a full on storyline and later on when he meets his friend and then all of them go back to his house,

his friends got younger friends and one of them walks into the bedroom he's like, yo dude, like you had this really cool old porn on. It had like a whole storyline and everything. I was like, where's that? I was like, just walk in, have a sex. Yeah. So I think, and her porn was, so it was not that I necessarily watched it all the time, but when I had seen it or whatever,

it didn't necessarily completely put me off. It wasn't her not enjoying herself, let's put it that way. Of course, yeah. And that's when it puts you off when, I mean for us obviously, when you can tell that the woman is not enjoying it. Like sometimes, even when- Is there ever a porno where a man's not enjoying himself

I mean let's be honest so okay so as much as then porn is it is very bad for your minds and I completely agree with that where do you think that I mean I've known children as young as eight to have watched porn in my industry and to have had to deal with safeguarding issues and things like that. So where do you stand with that? What would you do in that situation? As a teacher? Yeah, I guess, because I mean, as a parent, it would never happen. I mean, what can you do? Obviously, I'd go through all the channels and I'd, I guess, because I mean as a parent it would never happen. Obviously I'd go through all the channels and I'd let...

You know, you have to kind of report these things, absolutely, but unfortunately... But how do you then... You can't really... How do you then stop... So personally, and I was talking to Evan about this, what affected me as a child was not watching violent movies or watching violent games, it was sexual based, sex based. Sexual movies, movies with sex in it, you weren't supposed to see it, you accidentally

may have seen it, or your parents were watching a movie and they didn't realise it was in it. Yeah, or other things, that's what affected me. So how would you then change that or help that child of that age to then be okay again? Again, I think that's to then be okay again. Again, I think that's where sex education comes in. And at the end of the day, if a child, you know, it is important to say to that child, you know,

at your age this is not gonna happen, but this is what sex is. And then like, just that kind of starting to understand it as young people so that if they do see something, they understand it's not what they should be seeing right now. And I think that's where the issue is. I think, you know, like let's just, I think we're going too far ahead with the children thing straight away but I just think like, yes, that is a bad thing and we need to come onto that and I think that's something that we

will go into. But I think it's really important to kind of look at the, let's forget kids for a minute, let's look at people from the ages of 16 upwards and how that may have, like how the pornography industry has affected, probably changed, but then also affected young men and women. Again, sorry to make it about men, but all the men and how they see women and how they see their bodies as a man and how they see women's bodies and what then they expect of the other person. So for example, even let's turn it around a little bit. A woman could have watched porn from the age of 15, 16, got to a certain, even whatever, young girl may have come across it, seen it, whatever,

and then she's had a sexual relationship and her idea of sex is different to what her father's at that time. Like, I think it builds standards of something that isn't true. So when you've got a normal relationship and you're growing together and you've not been exposed to all of this strange sexual behaviour, not strange, but more, what's the word, like extended sexual behaviour, I'd say, rather than when you're young.

Like when I was young and I lost my virginity, I lost it with someone who was probably around the same par as I was in that area. It wasn't like we were there doing pornies straight away. You were just young kids. But you felt like you had to act a certain way. I do remember this. So when I was younger, I think you feel you had to act a certain way. I do remember this so when

I was younger I think you feel like you should act a certain way when you are having sex. I get that. Until you're an adult and realise that you don't have to do that. Like anal. Don't get me wrong I've never done it, will never do it. Cannot bring myself to even want to try it. No way in hell is anyone going near there. However I remember you telling me about someone you knew who said that her boyfriend wants anal and she said she was scared not to give it him in case he left her what do I do and we both sat there I went don't do it you know you know you know and because he wants to.

But if she'd have said no, because she probably did, or didn't, either way, they were together for much longer after that. For a few years. All men will ask. All men will ask, but do you know they'll respect you if you say no? Of course. And if they don't, then they're not worth that. And they're simply the way round.

If you wanted them to do something they didn't want to do, then they shouldn't have to do that. It is equal on both parts Yeah, and unfortunately going into other parts of pornography So yes, you've got like the general porn. You've got a bit of threesome, you know, a bit of normal porn I say normal porn, just normal, a bit of all-hands sex, you know Bit of anal. That's still semi-normal these days. And it is normalized, very normalized these days, it's fine. And fine, if you enjoy it, do it. That's absolutely fine.

But if you don't want to do something, you don't have to do it. And if you see something in a porno, that you don't want to do, that's okay. You don't have to do it. That's okay, yeah. You don't have to let a man come all over your face. You don't want him to. I mean, you don't have to let a man hurt her hurt you shouldn't be painful to her face and everybody's got their kink or their little thing you know you can't be judged for that that's okay no it's to your own, I'm just saying if she doesn't you do go for it but with consent yes 100% and that is the point

isn't it consent I think sometimes because there's so many different pornos where like they're being forced because that's the kind of porn that I think you know have you seen that one then when you've gone straight onto porno? You're there. Oh rape! I haven't typed that in. I'm very much a person of it. It's not a category. No but there are certain things. Yeah but but probably not on Pornhub. Well, there probably is, but I- It won't call it that, but there are- Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was just about to get into that.

In terms of what might come up when you first look up Pornhub, so obviously as soon as you go on there, there's a bunch of- I was just gonna go. Why don't you check out to somebody you don't know? Or something like that, I can't remember. But there's so many videos.

That's the ad that comes up. And if, not that I... Oh no, no. To someone in your area. No, I bloody don't, I want it to be anonymous. Yeah. That's not, it's not like that, it's like when you go on the internet

to try and find a film. Do you wanna chat to girls in your area? Yes. Me, no fucking don't, I'm trying to watch fucking, I don't know. Illegal movies here. Yeah. Not illegal porn. Trying to watch the new fucking Jurassic Park, I'm trying to watch fucking, I don't know. Illegal movies here. Yeah. Not illegal porn.

Trying to watch the new fucking Jurassic Park, fuck off. I'm just lying here. Never, when it was. When it was a new one. Anyway, so, but when you first go on to porn, obviously if you don't search for what you prefer, there'll be loads of choices. And honestly, I've had a little scroll,

and I'm like, okay, what is there? Oh, this, so click on, oh, no, she this she does not like she's enjoying herself and she looks about 12 that's the thing I hate that I hate it looks like they're not enjoying themselves love dead yorks yeah and like I don't know because do you know what I find when I say I don't know we're quite open about about sexuality about, and we would be very open and honest with our children in the right way at the right times, and be careful how we explained things to them. And we'd be very open about sex education in the right way.

However, other people, some of our friends have said, oh, you watch porn a lot, oh, you've seen porn. So some of you may be like, oh, you weirdo, oh yeah, using a vibrator, now all women weirdoes. Oh yeah, using a vibrator. Now all women do that, so they're lying. I'm not joking. They're not lying, but they just like that. They're not lying, they just like that,

but most women do use vibrators. And that's fine. Yeah, if you don't wanna use a vibrator, that's fine, but you're missing out a lot. Yeah, it's way better than sex. Yeah, much easier, much quicker than sex. Only joking, babe, love you. Well.

much easier, much quicker than this. Only joking babe, love you. Um, but, um, or incorporate it into sex, much, you know, you know, whatever. But my point being on that is that some of you might be thinking, oh god, what the hell are you talking about, what are you guys watching? But again, it is that normal element of everybody has a sexual drive, sex drive, everybody finds something that turns them on, or, you know, and to be honest about that, obviously not with young children, but to be honest about that with yourselves, and to think about that, and even, even,

that's okay. Yeah, and I think when you're watching porn, or when, you know, or whether you're experimenting with your partner and things like that, that's all okay. Yeah, of course. But it's the levels of pornography, and the levels of okayness, like acceptance

in that pornography is where I think we would like to discuss. There needs to be a line. Yeah, and where our conversation will probably go. Yeah, I know, and obviously I don't really watch it like I used to, and obviously we've dabbled in that and obviously men naturally just watch it in general. So they're always like, do you want to watch my part? No, I've never been asked that,

I've never been asked that by a man. In fact, I've been the one to suggest it, especially with, and he's been like, oh yeah, cool, cool. I'm happy with it, but he's very much like me. We have a very similar- Yeah, I wanna be with mine. Enjoyable. Yeah, I wanna be with mine. Enjoyment, something.

Same with my daughter. I don't like skinny women, and neither does he. I don't like women that look too young, and neither does he. So we're very much content with our choices if we do do that, which again, God, this will be years since we've actually done that. And also, men are quite easy to please, to be honest. Like, you don't need to watch porn

to have a good time with a man, do you? But obviously, when they're on their own, that might be what they're watching. It is more so what men are likely to do. I mean, what do they say? Like, the stat is, you know, men think about sex every 10 seconds or whatever. Or 30 seconds or whatever.

I don't even know. I'm pretty sure that starts from American Pie so don't quote me on it. But right I wanted to mention so I heard this I saw this on Instagram and I was like okay so apparently there's a girl I never heard of her until I actually did a bit of cpd with work. No way! I knew about this. No I didn't hear it from Instagram actually. So it says here that Bonnie Blue, I'd never heard of her until this CBD training, claims that she's broken the world record for sex with 1,057 men in 12 hours after inviting barely legal blokes. So it says, watch the clip in the video player as the notorious

porn star explains exactly how her controversial record bid panned out. Okay, so. But why? Right, hang on, there's things I need to say. So first things first, I saw on Instagram that a woman pulled her son away from this event. There's an event. Good!

There was! They were cubing! And he was an adult male and he pulled him away. Now the reason- Because then you're gonna ruin your own future, me. Sorry. I don't think it was anything to do with that. and he was an adult male and she pulled him away. Now the reason- Because you're gonna ruin your own future mate, sorry. I don't think it was anything to do, it wasn't anything to do with that.

She pulled him away because one, women are not objects to then just go out and queue to have sex with. And that's why it would have ruined his future because he's just gone there, well, not just his future, I feel like she's kind of, sorry, ad libbing. It wouldn't have really mattered,

I don't think his name was written down anywhere. No, because me, I was talking about this with other friends and I think they are. I think they know all the 1,000 people. Really? Yeah. Wow. Also, there's videos of the men. Okay, oh, right.

And then also, obviously, she just felt like, you know, I don't want him to get an STD, one, and I'm not saying that she's necessarily got any, but you never know. She probably had 10 men in. 10,057 men in and out in 12 hours. Are you kidding me? She had mental health issues.

Who did? Moni, what are their names? Bonnie Blue. Bonnie Blue. What kind of mental health? She posted a video not long after this happened of her crying, talking to somebody, publicist, whoever it was.

Oh I just don't feel the great now. I was like right you've had 1057 men come in you whether you've worn condoms or not more than one of those when I split. You've put your body and your emotional self through so much and you've had so many men's bacteria and things on you. What if one person, even one of them had an STD? I mean, did they make sure that was checked? I mean, probably did, I believe. Oh, I don't know. But an STD test, sorry, you need to wait a month, by the way, for an STD test to actually come back negative.

So it's only as good as the day it's been done on? Absolutely, or when the last time they had sex. You don't know when that really was. And so she said it affected her mental health. Of course it did, I felt sorry for her. But she must have had, to me, right, so I told Aaron this story first, and at first he laughed. And then I said, imagine that was your daughter.

And he was like, no. But, okay, so, not brought with the daughter thing, but it's not his daughter and he would make sure his daughter wasn't raised to believe that that wasn't anything. What happened to her to make her think that she wanted to break this world record? Yeah, but it says that she, um, Bunny has never made a secret to her desire to top the record, which is currently held by Lisa Sparks, who slept with 919 men in a day back in 2004. I'm not laughing at it, I think it's ridiculous and gross.

I think it's really quite upsetting that you feel the need to do that. For money, it's for publicity money. I don't know, maybe she's got another reason. She's addicted to sex, I have no idea, but I'm not being funny. I definitely couldn't have sex for that long. I mean, also, who's number 20? Who's number 1, 20? Who's number 1000? Who's number 1057 who's still stood in that queue waiting to have sex with a woman

who's just sat with 1056 men? Like what does that say about the men who queued for her? And I'm not saying that, I'm glad that mum pulled the son away, but I hope she did put him away for the right reasons because no she's not an object, but she's made herself one. Like I'm sorry I do I feel sorry for her because I feel like something happened to her to make her become this person I think so yeah, it's really sad really and I think she needs some serious help Because it's just not it's not something that I would want to do okay fair enough Maybe not everybody sees sex the same way that we do because we're very... If you don't see sex the same way we do, this is wrong.

Sorry. If you've got, not necessarily if you've got a high sex drive and things like that, that can just kind of be a thing. But if you react and act on sex in a certain way that is... To a point where only your feelings matter, only your desires matter, only you getting to be relieved matters and the other person doesn't, or where you feel the need to put your body through that much by the way trauma because if you have sex too many times with one person in a day do you get a tall vagina yeah I do so she's probably so sore after that. The worst of all the Russian, the worst water infection. I know right water infections, it's probably an STD. Just trauma in general. Yeah and I feel like something more is with that.

Yeah it is to it. I think she needs a good friend on her shoulder to cry on to be fair. Because if people are letting her, if friends are letting her without advising her you do know that I really wouldn't do this. Well they probably have. But okay well Bonnie Blue if you'd like to go on our podcast or if you'd like to have a little chat with us Yeah, I loved it. We'd love to speak to you more about it. I feel like As a topic and such on pornography and I think we'll do another episode on it I think we'll do another episode on probably a lot of our topics because there's so much more to him Unpick I just feel like I feel really sorry for this person

I'm this girl and what has made her feel the need to Well, shall I read you a little bit more of the article? I mean, it is the sun, so bias is bias at the end of the day. But after inviting barely legal and barely breathing men to take part in the London event on Saturday. Barely legal and barely breathing. She says she's done just that. In a video on her TikTok page, Bonnie, who has previously been branded predatory

for romping with teenage lads, boasted that her skin was looking better than ever after her sexploits. This is what my face looked like after taking 1,000 men less than 12 hours ago. Bonnie, who was wearing a strappy vest top and matching knickers, said in another TikTok video the controversial sex worker opened up about how the day had panned out and the organisation behind the alleged event. The big 1000 was completely done, Bonnie said, as she wore just a dressing gown. So I'll give you a bit of an overview. Garg Boggs!

After Garg Boggs! To start with. We'll post it and you can tell us what this means because we do not know. It's G star star B, B, uh, G. Anyway, after gog bogs. The room was absolutely full then we did groups of five like one after the other of fives. Guys after... Guys... oh no no. No no no. Anyway, they'll tell us. The room was absolutely full then we did groups of five like one after the other of fives. She said that she wanted to give people more time, so then they reduced it to one-on-ones.

So one person would watch whilst I was with somebody, and then it would literally just be like a rotating circle like that, she explained. Wow. In a statement to Fabulous Online, Bonnie's PR said she slept with 1,057 people. People, not men. As she hit 1,000, there were still 57 left in a queue, who Bonnie wanted to pleasure before ending the 12-hour day. There are only 720 minutes in a 12-hour period,

meaning if Boldly's claims are true, she must have allocated less than a minute per person. But in the comments section of Bonnie's videos, people were quick to question just why she did it and why the men themselves wanted to get involved. How embarrassing, one wrote. Sad that men would want to do that too. All for fame and money. I mean is it... I don't think it's fame. I think it's for money. From her part. Okay from her part I think it's about fame and money to an extent but I think there's some underlying issue as to why she's

got to do that in the first place. If you are going to be famous and I want money I don't necessarily want to be famous in that way but we'd love to earn quite a lot of money but I wouldn't do that for it. I wouldn't do that for it yeah. And then somebody else said why would anyone do this? And the men, what is everyone thinking? I mean to think that, to give men that much clout is being a bit naive but okay. What do you mean? She says and the men,out is being a bit naive, but okay. What do you mean? She says, I'm the man, what is everyone thinking? Of course men will do it, it's free.

Of course men will do it, yeah. Is it free? Is it free? I don't know. I don't think they had to pay. They must have had to pay, it's sex work. I don't think they had to pay, I think she would have got paid from royalty, from like, what's it?

Emotional, from sponsors and shit. Oh no, it does around here. Hang on, think is a bit sick to be honest. How can anyone want this? A third row. Another said sarcastically, but her parents are really proud. Your dad must feel so sad.

Yes, but again, sorry. She can do what she wants. I'm still not going to go on the internet and fucking troll her. I'll be a dick to her. At the end of the day, I'm not going to do it. Sorry.

At the end of the day, she can do what the fuck she wants. It's her body. I don't agree with it. I actually think she's probably a very sad person. There's something slightly wrong there. I might be completely wrong, she might be completely happy as best as well. I don't think she is. I don't think she is. Based on seeing her crying in a video. Don't go online and share your thoughts and opinions.

Because, quite frankly, the people who do that are people sat at home who ain't got the balls to come outside and do it anyway. So... Random side note. Alright. Selena Gomez. Put on weight, right? Oh! She still looks gorgeous.

Yeah, always. She still looks gorgeous. Oh my gosh, the trolling she got because she's skinnier than me, a bit bigger than you. Bit bigger than you. Yeah, I've seen her. I've seen her with a black outfit on, with the tights on. Yeah. She looks fantastic.

I thought she still looked great. Fantastic. You ought to see in the trolls. Oh, she looks fantastic. I thought she still looked great. Fantastic. You ought to see in the trials. Oh, she's got fat. Marco and mommy! How many kids she's had? Marco and mommy! She's had a baby!

Because she's pregnant! Women! Women were posting on that fucking post. Oh, god, I'd never want it to look like that. God, can't believe she's still got a husband. Blokes commented on it! Can't believe she's still got a husband. Who's commenting on it?

Blokes commented on it. That Karen. If my woman, if my girlfriend put on that much weight, and my partner put on that much weight, I'll move on. After having your child and you put your... Fuck off! No, love, she wouldn't be with you. No, she wouldn't be with you because of Margot fucking Robbie,

you absolute little troll sat behind a computer thinking it's OK. Guess who is with her? Her husband, who respects her, loves her, and is still there with her and all the tabloids. And what is wrong with you? And what's your life? Oh, sat behind the computer being a troll because you've got nothing better to do. Fuck off. Sorry, that made me so mad.

Erron met me when I was a size eight. But Sadie, that's what real men do. That's what I mean. Real men will love you anyway. And real men love you because you are beautiful because of who you are, you, not because. That's not because of my weight, yeah. And you're not, you're more beautiful

because you gave birth to these two fucking children. For God's sake, people. What is wrong are you? Not because of my weight. And you're more beautiful because you gave birth to these two fucking children. For God's sake. People, what is wrong with you? And even the internet just brings out the worst in people. I know, because they have to do it behind a screen. They have to do it, aren't they? You're not gonna stand there and call me fat to my face? Oh no.

No, you get a bottle to be at wine bottle, that is. Although when I was pregnant, when I was pregnant we went to Benidorm for a, a, no, a 30th birthday. Birthday for a 30th birthday and it was really boring because I couldn't drink or do anything. But this guy came over to me, did I take this? I was with, I can't remember, we were just walking down the street, you guys were all enjoying yourselves and this guy came over and he was talking to us, where are you from? And we were like, Lester, and he went, oh I a fatty from Lester. And I was like, I'm pregnant.

And he went, Oh, I'm really sorry. I was like, even so, you don't need to be. Even so, who are you? Sorry, you're an ugly dick. You're an ugly cunt. But I just stand there and go, Oh, where are you from? Manchester, was it? Ugly dickhead from Manchester, is it?

No, because that would have been the first thing that comes to my mind. Who are you? Because I'm a nice person. Whether you're a man or a woman, but again, always men love to point out when you're fat, they don't. How dare you? That's their issue, I think.

Oh absolutely, his dick's small and his ego's even, he tries to act like you've got a big ego, but you haven't, you're the most insincere person in the world. That's why you've got to go around talking about insulting other people to make yourself feel better. Yes, anyway, sorry, me going off on that, that is fine, I was literally off on a tangent anyway. Going back to Bonnie Blue, it says that others even questioned whether Bonnie's claims about the number of men she slept with were true. People who believe this are actually delusional, one wrote. Still don't believe it, a third insisted. 1000 men? Yeah, whatever.

Someone else said, well that's fine if you don't believe me. That's cool, even better. Bonnie's press representative also said that video proof of the events, wow. What we shared on the Adult Star's X-rated pages in the coming months. She also said that it was a documentary crew there filming for an upcoming program. Bonnie is said to make around 600,000 a month on early fans

and is worth around three million. She initially, yeah, Good for you, girl. I mean, men created porn, why not? Why not take control of it? I mean, I get it. Well, this next bit, I'm not sure. She initially found success through her niche of sleeping with barely legals and virgins, which has seen her blasted by critics. Which I understand and agree with, because if it was a man, any other way around, he would also be blasteded so that's absolutely not

acceptable. Oh yeah just not acceptable. Sorry but what so it's okay if you take advantage of it and don't get me wrong boys know what they want when they're probably about 14 probably earlier but not the point they're still young and stupid naive and you are a full-grown woman and you are probably actually taking advantage of them because you know they'll come for you. I feel like she is quite naive too though. Absolutely. And in a video before the Sex Pact London event, Bonnie controversially said that, again, as she had invited young men and those barely breathing to take part, Bonnie's 1,057-men day came after she spoke

to GB News about her decision to go down the OnlyFans route in search of a better life after initially working in recruitment. Wow. I used to work an office job, nine to 5, sit in my shower, get given 20 days on your leave and for a while I'd accepted that. She said, I get this, I do get this. I was like, oh okay, this is what life is, this is as good as it can get. I mean, you can do other things, you don't have to set work. And then you know when you start looking

back on life thinking, am I going to get gonna get you know when I'm in a care home And think wow I should have done something more. I should have cared about people's judgment So I thought no I want to change that I don't want to be scared about what people are gonna think about me Fair enough, we are not only fans but 1057 million a day. It's not even that I don't care about the 1057. I care about the barely legal and the virgin Yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't care about the 1057, I care about the barely legals and the virgins. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, the really old men who barely breathing. Bonnie previous sparked a furious backlash after bragging about sleeping with teenagers

and their married dads and grandpas. Oh my god. You're not helping yourself, love. No. Her stunts such as attending Nottingham Trent Uni and offering students sex if they let her film The Encounters has allowed her to be branded a predator. Mate, not a bad fucking marketing ploy though. Not bad at all, but if that was a man, 100% not okay.

But your women are asking for equality. Women are asking to be respected and yet because of how men can be so bad and you're doing the off... You're not helping this girl, all right, get it, do it, but don't see if they're underage people. See, they're underage. They're not teenagers. Barely legal. Oh, sorry, sorry.

Because they literally just turned 18. Well, again, I'm not saying you should go into universities and like, go say it, but they're old enough. But they're legal, aren't they? They're 18, and at the end of the day, they're not 15, are they? Yeah, you're not doing anything illegal, and I mean. And if a man slept with an 18 year old, that's okay.

That's okay. She even had her Australian visa cancelled after she planned to bed bed illegal teenage boys who have just finished school. And again, they're gonna do it anyway! They're gonna do it anyway. They'll probably come to the UK for the 1057! Bonnie was slammed by abuse survivor Harrison James who blamed her for perpetuating a dangerous culture. Calm down, Harvey. Calm down, Harrison. I'm joking.

No offense, yeah. Not that it's okay, but, and she's really, really gorgeous. This has been done for years by men. This has been done for years by men. It has been. Yes, but, and again, society is run by men. But they are legal teenagers to have sex and they are going to do it anyway, whether that is with, and at least they are legal. Like, I'm sorry, men, I'm sorry,

she's not like, she's not a pedophile, she's not gonna have to young boys because she fancies them, she's making money from it because she wants to make a living. Men go after young girls, I mean women have done it before as well, so people go after young people because they're predators of young people

because they like what they see with a young person. She's not actually doing that. However. Although I just think it's still a bit controversial. It is, it is, because then it does say, and I agree, she is a predator capitalizing on a dangerous culture where boys are conditioned by mainstream porn to view sexual encounters as their ticket

to validation and manhood. They've always viewed that since the early 50s. Absolutely. BCs, men. If anything, viewed that since the early 50s. Absolutely. BCs, they... If anything, it's just encouraging them that that's true. It's actually not happening. But at the same time, I can't judge her too much. You know, again, it's been a man's world for so long. We're just kind of trying to think, don't feel it, Aunt Bea. Well, I need to...

Yes, I think as a good person and as good people, we wouldn't agree with a mother or a woman doing this. I wouldn't want my son doing it. Yeah. I wouldn't want your daughter doing it either. Well, I wouldn't want my son doing it. You wouldn't want your daughter doing it either. I wouldn't want my daughter doing this. Exactly. Oh she ain't one, she'd never do that. But at the same time I would like to think that my son wouldn't see a woman as an object. I think that's the problem. These 18 year olds or even 79 year olds because they say barely legal or barely breathing. At the same time I wouldn't like my son to think that it's okay to treat a woman like an object and do something like this. However, if a 25 year old man slept with an 18 year old girl it is legal and nothing would happen for me. Yeah absolutely. I mean they probably would have posted it all over social media though because they probably try to hide it. Not saying that that's also unacceptable. Everything's fucked up. They just say that Bonnie defended her actions claiming that 18 year olds are adults and can therefore make their own choices. Which again, if that was a girl, she was 18, it's like when we won't even declare rape anymore because it doesn't really get anything done to it, so at the end of the day, at least they've consented to it and they're 18.

Anyway, we've got to move on because obviously we've chatted a load of crap again and we will do an episode 2 on pornography, we'll do an episode 2 on controlling relationships and we'll do an episode 2 on a lot of other things because we can never dive as Deep as we want to Going back to our main topic, let's have just a quick think a very quick think on the effects on young minds Yeah, so obviously as we were saying early exposure to pornography can distort a young person's understanding of sex and relationships And I do really agree with that. It really really can yeah, absolutely the unrealistic scenario is actually like in these pornography videos.

The lack of consent actually in some cases as well and the often unattainable body standards to create a very warm fear of reality. Now on that one about like the lack of consent we haven't actually touched on and we'll do it very quickly, is snuff videos, and videos that you see that come online that are like, a lot of the time, people would think or say, oh, it's a fake video, it's a fake video. So snuff videos are basically rape, murder, sex, rape, murder, and a version of porn that people love, or very aggressive pornography, which a lot of people-

Yeah, there's no murder ones, you're not allowed, they are illegal. Yeah, but they exist. Yeah, yeah. That's not as if snuff films are illegal, but they exist. Like the dark web. And like for example people who actually... I'd like to know. A story that happened around here was about a young girl, underage, who got murdered and it was disgusting and awful but the person who actually committed the crime, they found out was watching very, very dark, horrible pornography. So it still exists, you can find it, believe me, you can find it. And if you're a little technical

and you know how to use the dark web and you, you know, it is easily findable. So those things as well. So say for example you've got a young person in impressionable mind who's already watching pornography and then they meet someone who's a little bit older and is watching a different type of pornography. That stuff can grow and develop. And when you're a young impressionable mind at the age of 14 to 18,

those things can really affect your growth, like your mental growth. I agree completely. And I do feel like that's where episode two will kind of, sorry, part two of this episode will come in and delve in deeper into the history of pornography, how it started, the development of it,

and the porn industry itself. And we'll probably talk a little bit more about other areas of that, including like the Playboy Mansion and then Pam and Anderson and how, but it's not all bad. Like, it's not all bad. I'm not saying it's all bad, but I'm saying we've kind of touched on certain things that could affect certain people. We've touched on the fact that it's not all bad, like, it's not all bad. I'm not saying it's all bad, but I'm saying we've kind of touched on certain things that

could affect certain people. We've touched on the fact that it's not all bad and there's no normal porn. We've touched on the fact that we're growing into a modern era when our only fans and women can take control of it themselves, but to an extent are they? And you know, I just think it's really important to be aware of that. And I do think we'll have to do an episode, a part two, part two to this. And obviously there's a potential for desensitisation, which is a real concern, and kids might start to normalise behaviours that are not really healthy or consensual, and yeah.

And a quick one, Sadie, just going back to what you were going to say about, you know, certain people who don't allow their children to have sex education. Now, part of me believes that is because maybe they are sexually being sexually abused and they don't want them to be aware of it. And there's another reason, which you've said. Well, that's not one of the main reasons. In a safeguarded and prevent case, that is not one of the triggers. So if someone is opted out of sex education in school, partly because of cultural reasons and obviously they don't want them to be, you know, privy to that and that's fine.

Other things which I learnt recently and I didn't realise this was something to do with a far right group but I can't be 100% sure so if I'm wrong fine correct me. But I think it is where they basically prohibit their lads from having sex which means they get really violent. They get really violent because they can't let out that urge. But that's a natural urge, like you were born, you were on this earth to procreate. That's like saying you don't let two lions have sex and the male lion like... And then see what that male lion does. Right, like that's a bit ridiculous because even the men in that family, even the dads

of that family, are literally in the same boat when they're being gone or whatever and they're thinking, well I secretly do it, but my wife's not allowed you know I mean they say good it will go and do it and if the wife isn't it's not No, but they're secretly going to think about sex they're secretly going to have done that when they were younger Yeah, then you've got a dad telling his child not to do it again because the control is against faith But apparently from what we did last week in CBD, opting out of sex education could be... What's it called? I'm gonna have to find it. There's a word for it but...

It's a particular thing, it's called a particular thing where they... But it is a far right group of extremism basically. Yeah, yeah, well they're saying that you know it's a bad thing to think about sex. Yeah, you should chastise yourself on sex. Ridiculous. From the minute you were put on this earth, it was made to procreate. It was made to reproduce. At the end of the day. It's why you're not a pharaoh. But anyway, we must be full because we aren't almost there. But can we just talk on some documentaries and popular culture references that I would love you to kind of check out

guys. She says this every week and I still never do it. She's rubbish. I need to watch these. There's some really good ones they date. She gives me some and I'm like, oh I'll go and watch that and I don't. Look, check the script after the the. Anyway, there are some documentaries that shed

light on this issue so please watch something called the Social Light Dilemma it's on Netflix and is a good starting point for understanding how algorithms and manipulators and to push content. I think we've mentioned that one before haven't we? We have but this also touches on elements of pornography within that. Okay so there are also documentaries that focus specifically on the porn industry like Hot Girls Wanted on Netflix which discusses the exploitative side of the industry. There are many more documentaries available on streaming services or for rent that highlight different aspects of the industry.

That's right, and in pop culture, the shows, sorry, and in pop culture, shows like Euphoria on HBO Max, address the complexities of teenage sexuality in the digital age, which I must say must be insane. When we were kids, you know what I mean, whereas now our children have got so much access to things that you can't control. We didn't really have the access. And as we mentioned on the Kids in the Internet episode the other week,

like last week, that is just crazy really. Look, that's that. Yeah, and obviously these references can help us understand the broader context and spark very important conversations. So, if we've got time we can have a couple of listener stories. Yes, we've received some stories that highlight the real world impact of these issues. And it's a reminder that it isn't just an abstract discussion that these issues affect real people. That's correct.

So, before we go into those stories, we do need to make sure that we talk about this with our children, be open and honest, and communication, as we always say, is key. And if they come home asking questions, don't hide things, be honest. Explain them maybe in a very sensitive way, but be very, very honest, and let your children know they can always talk to you. And them maybe in a very sensitive way, but be very, very honest and let your children know they can always talk to you. And Sadie does a very good thing with Kaisa

and she teaches him where his private parts are and what places people shouldn't be touching. And one of those things, and I was very impressed with this, was his mouth. Because one of the, you know, you don't actually think just of, yes, these are your private parts, but your mouth is a private part. And unfortunately, I mean,

you've seen so many documentaries and so many bad news stories and so many things happen. I mean, we look for it. We want to know the way the world is. We also have a really, really weird addiction to crime stories and we want to know what's happening in the world.

But it's such a scary thing. It was such a great thing to teach him and follow us. We also taught him who his safe people are so he could tell us and I explained to him that if people are teaching those private parts that are not your safe people you need to tell us and it's very important to teach your children the right language so obviously penis, bum, mouth, nipples. Don't say willy or don't say, I mean he does say willy but I do always say that's your

penis. That's really important, yeah. We have had a few listener writings and I'm going to go first. This is from Lauren in London and I'll go first. So, hi Amy and Sadie. I'm writing in because my boyfriend's porn use has become a real issue. At first, I didn't think much of it. Everyone looks at stuff online right? But it's gotten to the point where it's affecting our intimacy. He's constantly on his phone and when we are intimate it feels like he's comparing me to what he's seen. I've tried talking to him but he just

gets defensive. Sorry, he just gets defensive. It's like he's lost, sorry, it's like he's lost in this endless scroll and I don't know how to pull him back. I feel so alone and unwanted I don't know if I can keep going like this. Okay, my advice would be maybe you're kind of overthinking that into the bedroom. I did think. Because usually men are very much in their moment. But it depends. However.

It depends on how much he's on it. I said however. However, if he's on his phone all the time and that's what he's looking at all the time there is an issue and if you feel like you can't go on like that then don't because at the end of the day you will be able to find a man very easily who will appreciate you for who you are and not be on his phone on porn. I'm assuming he's on porn all the time yeah yeah yeah shitty fucking comedy Instagram honestly I said to him can I borrow your phone I need to scroll

through something and my phone was dead guys I don't even watching the telly I thought I'll watch Air Arms phone I was on there five minutes I've never seen so many stupid practical jokes. Plus sized women because people are making fun of them which is horrible. And then naked women. I was like okay I'm done with that. Bored. The practical joke side of thing was the most common one and the amount of times people got hurt made my bum twitch which I don't ever like to say. Yeah I know it makes me, it makes me, I'm like ahhhhhhhhh I can't watch that anymore. Like okay he's got those voluptuous, he loves the voluptuous women with the big boobs and the big bumming. They're always on that, but I don't care about

that. I feel like I'm one of those, it's cool. Also the relationship is very strong, it's just not like that, it's fine but. But the practical jugues, like do you you wanna watch any more people getting hurt in a really bad way, like men hurting their willy, like falling on a pipe. One of those, my, I was like, this guy fell off something, I was like, oh, it's killing me, it's killing me. But anyway. If it's on porn all day, love, just fucking leave.

Yeah, and also, yeah, if it's on porn all day, yeah, find someone better. Did you people go to fucking rehab for porn addictions, okay, for sex addictions? So it's a real thing. It's only if you're a bit worried about it. But it's also, sex is also healthy. So there's that fine line.

I think there's a fine line. Don't make people feel bad because they like sex. But if you're constantly thinking about it every single minute of every day, a little bit different. And if you're thinking about sex while people get hurt, not okay. Sadie. Okay, I've about sex while people get hurt, not okay. Sadie.

Okay, I've got another one, no location, no name. I'm a young woman and I've struggled with body image for as long as I can remember. When I was younger, I stumbled upon online pornography and it completely warped my perception of what sex and body should look like. Everything was so perfect. You should have carried a much more porn

because there's a large of ladies in there. Everything was so perfect, so staged. I started comparing myself to the woman I saw and I felt completely inadequate. Really? Honestly, there's some really weird looking women on porn. But if you watched it really really young, I can understand. I suppose, yeah. Especially the kind of porn when in like, say, I don't know how old she is, but say if she watched it 10 years ago, it was very different. Like, born bodies. Yeah, but now, like with only bands, come on. Some would like cracking women on here.

No, but when cracking women is in bigger, better bodies, different for look, just back then it was very much, and it still is in a lot of ways. The mainstream porn. But you said that men you don't know when she was young. I'm just saying, I didn't say, but I said 10 years ago, 15, 20 years ago. Also, even now, men will still choose women who've had big boob jobs and have got tattoos

and the tanned and that is true. Butt lifts are now becoming a thing. Right, so let me finish this because I've got something to say about it. So, everything was so perfect, so staged. I started comparing myself to the women I saw and I felt completely inadequate. It's taking years of therapy to even begin

to undo the damage. I wish someone had told me how unrealistic it all was. I hope my younger sisters never have to go through this." Right, before you say anything, I saw this woman the other day and I don't know who she is, and as much as I didn't like her opinion, I actually did agree with it, but she did say, the problem is, all you men, you say, I want natural, I want no makeup, I want this, but then you reward those that do have loads of makeup and do have big boobs and do have this. And she was so right! A little bit.

She was so right. No. The same men who want natural don't want the big boobs. That's bullshit. Fine. To an extent. Yeah. I've not got big tits.

I've got small boobs. No, no, no. I'm not saying they're rewarding their partner. I'm saying that when they choose to watch something man It is the fake boobs. It is absolutely Yes, but isn't it but I would what I I'll answer that from a woman's perspective. I prefer to watch them But I'd like a fit woman who's also natural, but you know what I don't know No, can I say one thing I mean another They just want to natural woman is that beautiful

So like Chris says to me all the time be natural you've never had any boot up to you never look for the way I'm gonna fucking start. Yeah, and I'm not actually, I'm not having lip filler, but I love Botox. I need fucking Botox, my life is so hard now. I'm never gonna have a boob job, I won't have a lip, no bum lift. Do you know what I mean? This is all me and all my body.

It is. I'll have the Botox to stay this way. If I could afford them when we make over, I'm fucking having it. I paid for a four grand wedding, a two and a half grand, half assed wedding. Could have fucking bought me fucking, my point is, though, if you saw Jessica Alba. Yeah, yeah, but my point is... A half-assed wedding. Could have fucking bought me fucking...

My point is, though, if you saw Jessica Alba... Yeah, yeah, but she is actually beautiful. Exactly, naturally beautiful, right? So they just... I get where you're coming from. Yeah. But my partner, and your partner, for example, they do like natural. Chris doesn't want me to have a lip for that, or both tops. No, no.

He wants me to stay and grow all racefully with him. It's not gonna happen. But he's a perfectly nice guy. That's very rare. Very rare. And also, yes they do probably want natural, but they want natural to be perfect. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And maybe we don't. Yes, you're right though. I think we need, no, I think on episode, on part two of this, we get a man on. Oh yes. Not one of our boyfriends. Oh my God. Not one of our boyfriends.

Okay, who then? Okay, we'll talk about that. I'll find one. I'll talk about that. But I'll go find one of my life friends. You're so right though. They want Okay, we'll talk about that. I'll find one. We'll talk about that. I'll find one of my love friends. You're so right though. They want natural, but they want perfect natural. It's totally different.

And then, when they go on YouTube, YouTube, YouPorn, Pornhub, wherever they are, they don't find that. They go in for the next best thing. Manmade, manmade perfect. So, you know. Anyway, I've got another one. Go on then, got the one the shame and isolation okay so this is actually from Jane in Toronto Canada say thank you Jane and I'm a

recovering sorry sorry James sorry sorry sorry I'm a recovering addict told you they had to go to rehab sorry James James I'm a recovering addict. Told you they had to go to rehab. Sorry James, jokes. Recovering addict and pornography was a huge part of my problem. It started innocently enough, just something to pass the time, but it quickly spiralled out of control. I was hiding from everyone,

spending hours alone in my room. The shame and isolation was unbearable. I lost friends, almost lost my job. It was like a dark hole I couldn't climb out of. It took a lot of courage to admit I had a problem and seek help but it was the best decision I ever made. I still struggle sometimes but I'm learning to live a healthier life. Well done James. Well done James and for a mountain right into us. Yes thank you we appreciate that. And I must say James thank you for writing him because I do feel like

I mean he's not put his last name. And I'm sure there's a lot of Jameses in Toronto. But I think for him to write in, takes balls. And... Just say something, yeah. And I appreciate you. And he's obviously the kind of guy who obviously isn't thinking that's normal.

But, yeah, and he's decided. And a lot has normalized. I've got an issue, I need to sort this out. And that's great, I think that's fantastic. Well, from you, I'm really happy for you. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. So do one more and then we'll find a position. One more, we have another one from America.

Sorry, Canada's not America, sorry, I don't mean to be rude. From the USA. I worked in the adult film industry for a few years. It wasn't what I expected. I thought it would be empowering, but it was often degrading and exploitative. No fucking shit. Sorry, that was me. Who is this from, sorry?

No name, just says from USA. The power dynamics were completely off. I saw things that I can't unsee. I saw people being pushed to their limits, both physically and emotionally. It's not all glamorous. I'm out of the industry now and I'm trying to rebuild my life. Is that a woman though? I'm assuming, but the experience has left a deep scar.

I want to warn people about the realities of what they are watching thank you so much I think that's so great of you to write in I think that's so honest and I completely agree you know people are pushed to their limits and I think we forget that these are real people I always think when I'm watching TV I think oh is that person trying, is that person feeling this way or is that just bad acting? And I think there's a lot of that important. Is this person enjoying it or is it bad acting? Most of the time it's bad fucking acting.

Definitely. Yeah, I think let's leave it there on that one. We were gonna miss the Pick Your Poison section for this, but I've got one question for Sadie and I think it's actually quite a good one. So, would you rather, or pick your poison, have open access to all information all the time for yourself as an adult,

or heavily censored information? Well, access to all, I feel like I'm an adult. As an adult. As an adult, I have an age where I can compartmentalize, I can decide what I think is. No, but you've got then the, yeah. You've got knowledge to decide. Yeah, of course. I've got then the opportunity to decide what is... Whereas if that question was directed at would you rather your child, for example, then it would be different.

Okay. And again, this one, I think... We know what we would answer to this. Of course, yeah. But other people may do this, so it is important. Would you rather discuss healthy relationships and consent with your child or avoid the topic on time? Absolutely, but Guy, can we just highlight that? That literally, you know, have those conversations. Make sure you do. If you avoid that conversation, you avoid that topic,

they will find out from somewhere else, it won't be censored, and it could be terrible. And it could not be terrible, but it could be. But this is like every conversation ever though. Like, you know, we never got dis... our finances never got discussed with us without from our mom, from our dad. We were never discussed finances. We were never discussed... Absolutely. Working hard. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And doing well. And we had to figure that out for ourselves.

And not to drink. Yeah. figure that out for ourselves. And not to drink! Yeah, which is I think why we have taken a lot longer to do well in life than maybe the general... But Gen Z's now! Drinking less alcohol ever than ever! So I think in general our parents didn't discuss our finances with us. Our parents didn't say you should work hard because of these reasons. Our mum was good with us, was great with us, made sure we had a really good education but she didn't explain to us why we were doing that. It took us a lot longer to do well in life because of that I think. Not because we only thought of our parents but again lack of their knowledge. Yes of course I'm not saying it's their fault obviously but what I'm

saying is like if our parents had said to us, like if our mum had said I can't afford it this is what I've got we would have probably thought let's try and get it yeah we did we did try to help at the end once we got to once we knew about 19 yes we knew yes exactly and we'd move I'd moved out at 16 and back and back again yes because I broke up at 19 when there was that whole know, I think and we both did, can you remember? We both said we will have pay, we will have pay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely, absolutely. Fine, but I think with any conversation, like I always say to Kaisel, you know, you've got to work hard,

you've got to be, you've got to be smart and know how to read and know how to write and know how to do maths. Because when you're older, I need someone to look after me when I'm older. Me and we do. Think about what I'm thinking, should I have a kid? But I'm far better off now, nearly 36 years old, than I've ever been in my entire life. And to not get into debt, or, I'm not saying that Om didn't tell us that, but I think that she may not have thought about telling us that, It wasn't anything that did his fault. No, no, no, I'm not saying that.

And I think it's important to consider the fact that actually, I don't think it's just about that. I think it's about in this day and age, young children have a lot of other ways to make money. Yesterday, I went to an event at work this week. I've been there for the last two days. Yesterday, towards the end of the day, it's like four o'clock, half young girl young girl in a full pink suit how young 23 got an age probably bang on

oh no no no she's just 24 she's about 23 25 honestly I know I know I could tell I know because everyone thinks I'm younger than I am and I just can't think. Right, so, full pink suit, pointy white heels, long blonde hair, curly, right, looking good. Everyone's having photos taken with her. And me and this guy who was on our stand with me, like, we were making a joke and he went, oy, oy, she's it, because we're in an accountancy event.

Accountancy, just to clarify. Not what we're trying to say. No, no, just to clarify. Not when you come in the centre of attention as the accountancy event. No, no, no. And this guy went, I think she's famous for an accountancy. Like, we were joking, he went to me, he was kind of joking. He went, she's famous, everyone's having selfies with her. And he said something like,

from princes or somewhere, like a place. And I went, I thought you said she's a princess. He went, yeah, I don't think she is a princess. Why is she famous? I went, oh, that other one's famous as well. She's having selfies taken with her. So we're looking at all. Anyway, don't worry, we've got some feedback today from the podcast person.

She bloody owns or runs her own podcast on accountancy, which isn't my chosen topic. But she's obviously done really well. She's like, obviously obviously she's not like an unbiased or anything like that but obviously she knows really well about the accountancy world about numbers you know doing the thing. She's done really well. She's created a podcast. Brilliant. But anyway, makes me sick. 23 year olds rich and famous because they know how to use technology and me and my executive on the way home from work the other day, he's a lovely, great guy, also 23.

And he was saying, it's crazy doing it, like, you know, how much you can do at that age. And he was telling me, actually, and he was giving me some great advice on what his friend knows about the algorithm and how to get our podcast to work, because he is fantastic. Even he was like, giving me great advice on how to improve the podcast and do things well because he's younger and he's got friends

who he's one friend. All he does is takes clips off of my very well-known Netflix trick show Don't Know What It Is. He gets paid £700 a month in royalties because all he does is take clips that people like from a particular show, put them on TikTok and he's got so many followers he gets ads. So in this day and age young children people are making so much money because of technology and also that was where we are, young kids are owning toys. Oh yeah. And my parents are owning toys online and they're getting paid for it and they start off in their normal living experience and then before you know it in five years they're in a bloody mansion. So put me on podcast followers that's where we want to be.

Listen, Kenea watches this family, alright, so my niece watches this family, who literally are like, they had this small house and they started off like opening presents at Christmas, doing Easter things, doing this. They've got this flipping mansion now and honestly she was showing me, she was like say did you want to show me, I was like who is it? She's like oh, it's this family, It's Christmas time and they're getting open presents. They never had more money than that. They're open, their presents are like thousands each

of the five kids. I'm like, stop it. But then you have the controversy, we'll do another episode on egg kids on the internet and all that as well. And this, we've gotta end it. The island world's got a good thing. We've gotta end it there.

We have to go in. But yes, you're right. And it is insane. But then at the same time, you're then falling for the category of, you're just showcasing to everyone else who hasn't got anything and what you should be able to have sort of thing. But then you're with from other people online.

And that's not their fault, is it? It's the government. Yes, it is society in the way it's run, yes, and yeah, absolutely, but then you have the other half of it where you're like, well, if you don't, you've got other people, influencers online now who are saying, if you don't know how to make money online, if you're poor in 2025, you shouldn't be because this is how you make money. Yes true but also you need time we have

full-time jobs because we need to run a house you can't just say oh you know I'm gonna quit my job and do the podcast full-time because it's still with my parents because we still need it yeah they yes okay yeah they still live with their parents. And also there's people like I've got friends who have opened online businesses and stuff but they're in Zimbabwe. It's not the same. It's not the same as here. You can't say it's easy enough to earn money. It's not the same. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. It's not the same. And if poverty exists it's because your government is allowing it. It's not because of the people. You can't blame people for being poor.

Absolutely. Okay, fine. However. You might be able to blame people who aren't motivated to work. And not trying. I have never met a Zimbabwean or a Nigerian that isn't willing to try their hardest and work their hardest. Absolutely.

That is not their fault. Okay here you can claim benefits, call on me and you'll be fine. Let's be honest. But you cannot blame a culture for not being able to earn money online when it's completely different. Absolutely, but anyway we need to leave it there and as always I'm sorry I'm making sort of fucking sound issue. However, it's a tough conversation, the porn one, not the one about kids and the internet. We'll come back to that. We'll do a part two on all the

bloody episodes because to be fair, I do think we could do a deeper dive into everything. But it's a tough conversation but one that we needed to have. We did. So cheers to navigating these complex issues with honesty and compassion. So cheers Amy. Cheers Sadie. Wine's gone. Cheers Amy. Wine's gone. Fuck it. And we are so pissed. Music