Duck Call Room - Godwin Is Hopping MAD at His Wife's New Rule

Episode Date: December 15, 2022

Uncle Si and Godwin are waiting impatiently for some fresh coffee to be delivered. Godwin starts getting queasy as Si explains his upcoming cataracts surgery. John-David and Si realize they won't receive a Duck Commander Christmas bonus this year. Martin and Si teach Godwin about native scorpions in Louisiana. Plus, can anyone truly live "off the grid" nowadays? And the boys all give their BEST gift ideas ... which all happen to be things they either have on their person or in their trucks.  --- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

That's an obnoxiously big hat. In the words of Gobwin, that's something about hat, Harry. I'm not, yeah. That's not a hat that I'm familiar with. Is it? It's not, it's an oversized hat. Oh, or so I'm not. Why low?

I'm just familiar with 26 letters in the alphabet. I don't know why. Is there, does somebody have more? Oh, he doesn't know why. I got it. I got it. It took me a second. Yeah.

That means you only need 25 of them, right? Yeah. Well, then you're only familiar with 25, oh. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, that's what I said. Oh. And I don't know why. 25 letters and I don't know why.

Welcome back to the duck call room. Here I am. I'm just trying to read the outdoor news before we got started. Oh, we're already started. We're rolling. It's an early morning episode. What's happening in outdoors? Nothing worth talking about.

Well, it is hot. But I read the wire every day. It is Louisiana, December, 80 degrees. 80 degrees. Yeah, it got up to like 79 yesterday. I went fishing in short-legged breeches. 10 minutes or night. Yeah, but you'll do that one.

It's 50. That doesn't really. That don't tell us nothing about the temperature. I don't tell us nothing. You'd wear short-legged bridges ice fishing. I'd work. I ain't doing no ice fishing. You'd at least be able to zip your bridges into short.

I ain't doing the ice fishing. Godwin, do you have a pair of. pants that don't zip off at the knee that you wear. I'm sure you own a pair. Those are his funeral pants. Weddings and funerals only. I've seen him at funerals and zip offs.

But it's expected, so it's cool. Man's got a style about it. Yeah. And the person there, I don't know. So, I mean, like. They're not concerned. They can your left. Hey, I don't think they go over.

Hey, I don't know. They're bad again. Oh, what was there? No. No, if they were, odds are. If they did, odds are, we wouldn't be friends. Anyway, but it's the duck call room. I do got...

Morning edition. Episode 198, 198. I'm getting a head nod. 198. We're in the 70. I feel like you should have saved that hat for 200. Well, I'll bring it back. But now it's lost something.

I purchased this hat because it says American flag on front and it's really big and fun. but I was going to wear it for the soccer games Well it came in the mail three days after our soccer team was no longer playing So now I just got a cool hat for the 4th of July They got one with a panther on the 4th of July Wow Well about to order another one You wear that on a 4th of July and you're going to roast

Oh it's yeah I'm used to sweating If you get on the lake and start down the lake And you imagine on that foot You're going to lose that at No this hat's not for high speeds I tried to drive here with it. It does look like it keeps the sun off of it.

Oh, it blocks the sun out like a cloud. Is it hot? A little bit. It's got to be. But it's funny because it's bigger than a normal hat. It's bizarre. It's about five times the bizarre world. So you can make a custom patch.

Can you? Oh, Black Panther patch coming in soon. Sire, do you want one of these with a Black Panther on it? Please do. Come on. Hey. Look how good you'd look. No.

That thing's obnoxious like John says. Aw. You started laughing what I wore it in. I know. Only you can get by with it. That's why it's funny. Look, here's one with some cards on it. You can wear it to play poker.

I'm getting you a hat while we record. Okay, then I'm not getting it. There ain't a reason to waste money on it. You know where. less than 70 days away from Christmas? Daytona. From Daytona? I did not have that.

I didn't either. That is Christmas to a redneck. I didn't care. We're less than 30. 27 days till A1. I don't understand a lot about NASCAR. I mean, I know a lot of them guys. But their biggest race of the year is the first one.

Yeah, it is. Which is what? Help me make that make sense. What is the first? First of them. Daytona. Daytona. NASCAR.

Like, I just, I never understood a sport. Like, we're going to start with the best. And there goes the rest of it. Well, I just, I just really can't get in, you know, just car zooming around a circle. Gobwin can. I mean, Godwin can't get in the car, but he can get into Washington. Oh, yeah. I can get in it now.

Thank you. He can get in it now. I'll say this. When we would go, we used to have to go to, or not how, we used to get to go to all these races. and Daytona, when they're side by side the whole time, and that was cool. Yeah. It's cool at Talladega when, like, you looked out there

and you couldn't see a car. Then we went to one race. Because it's so big. You can't see the other side of it. You're like, wow. I mean, you know, it's just like, holy cow. But then we went to one race, and they weren't side by, like, just old Mr. Johnson just left everybody.

Yeah, that was the one we sponsored. Yeah. There's always a gar. He's back. What is the size of a, of a, A car racetrack. They're all different sizes. They different?

Yeah, every one of them. That one in the football stadium was cool. When they went to the Coliseum? A couple years ago. They went to the Rose Hall. L.A. Coliseum this year. Are they doing that again? Yeah.

That was fun to watch because they were like, they're going to run through the streets of Chicago. And if you really want to know how big it is, like whenever they played that football game inside the racetrack and the football game looked this big, you're like, and that's a short racetrack. That's a little tiny. Oh, Bristol, yeah.

Yeah. When they had the Tennessee, Virginia Tech at Bristol, I was there. Why do they make it slope? So they ain't got to turn so hard, I reckon. Yeah, so they got a little grip. I don't want to flip. If you made it flat, you'd be drifting the whole time. Yeah.

And then there's going to be people getting head head on. For more speed. Speed kills, so. Like Daytona, the banks are so, of course, everybody knows. You got to be going 45 miles an hour, You'll fall off it. What? That's how steep the curves off.

I didn't know that. I just learned something. Oh, you serious? Yeah. I'd never make it. That's only funny because I've been watching Christmas vacation every night. You see serious? They shape it like a bowl.

You know? And I just remember when I was riding with Clint Boyer, okay, we're on the top, and he's running one. 40 and I'm telling you come on in with that coffee. Yo, I just look outside the window

and hey, it's about that far from the wall. It's a different show now, boys. Hot, boy. So I'm going to pour about half that out. Mm-mm. Good, good. Find me another cup.

He got two of them right there. He can pour it in. That white one, he can pour you some in. The best part of this is going to be the people get to see how much cream and sugar size all you. cup of coffee. It won't be much because Phil didn't make it.

Remember that? Was you there when, no, you wasn't there yet. Well, we were at the trailer and we went to just throw that over here.

No, don't throw it. We'll get it on a break. We'll get it on a break. I wanted it, sugar. Okay. Oh, boy.

Oh, boy. That's a lot of sugar. Oh, he liked. We need him with a little energy. This is the morning edition of the duck call room. This isn't generally our jam. We're more like a 2 p.m. crew. Well, but my kids were out of school, so I got

to sleep in a little bit. Did you? Yeah, washed all Christian Eagles, state champs. Did they win? Oh, yeah. 2814, I think. My cousin made a tackle or two. Really? Oh, yeah. Which one? Jet. If you got to be named Jet and your dad

played professional baseball, you better make a tackle on the state championship. Oh, he's a hudnel. Yeah. Okay. That makes a sense. That makes sense. He played well. That's that married-in genetics. Yeah.

But the most important thing is our kids didn't have to wake up and go to school, so I'm cool with it. Yeah. I slept until 7.15, which was about five minutes late by the time I got everything going. So, you know. It happens. It's all good. I wasn't going to wake them up for it to be here.

I can assure you that. We'll just deal with that. Never wake a sleeping baby. Never wake a sleeping baby. No. No. That's a rule. That's a rule.

You feel better, Sy? Yeah. Oh, and he about spilled it in his life. I thought I was about to get burnt. No, I'm quick as a cat, boys. What kind of cat? A black brown.

A slick cat. I know, they're being seen. There you go. That's how quick they are. Quality be. Well, anyway, 199. What did we say?

198. 198. And we ran out of material a 194 ago, so we're doing all right. Yeah. Yeah, when he said. I mean, how lemon tastes in coffee. All right, there's some material. Are you double-fisted in coffee and tea?

Yeah. What in the world? No, I was going to say. Boy, he likes caffeine. I mean, caffeine gave me the bud. The lemon just smooths it out. Oh.

You get a buzz off caffeine? Ain't no way. His tolerance so high. Not there. He ain't about it in years. I can read the date off a dime off the bottom of it. Uh-oh. What?

No. Oh, is it wheat coffee? You can read it down. Hey, it's coffee. It's better than other coffee you had, ain't? It's better than what I had 10 minutes ago. A zip bar, which was zip. If you need a little shot of energy, you can get that monster stone left over there.

It's probably ain't flat yet. E! Nah. Yesterday's drink. Anyway. All right, let's take a break. We'll be back right after this. All right, look, springtime is here.

It's warming up. You know what that means? That means more outside cooking. And y'all know. We love to eat beef. around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Tritels Beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good? It's so good. Our friend, Sao Robertson would say, bye on the grill. Look, before we got Tritels, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run

the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes from. But with Tritales beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Triedales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. There are a fifth generation American ranch. So they've been at it for a while. Now look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I'll tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness

and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check Check out try tails beef. I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat. She and a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. Easy.

We bad mouth to make a babyfield. I had to take that hat off. I like it. He's funny. I'm not. I mean, again, we're not a sports podcast, but it's all that's going on. I got one. But.

I got one. I got one. If you judge a man by being a good quarterback by beating the Raiders. Hey, did you know that... Wait a minute now. Hold it. Hold it. Hey, Ken Roxon left, Honda and went to Suzuki.

Can you believe that? I can't believe it. I can't either. I don't even know who we're talking about. Now we're really a sports guy. No, we're on that motorcross bag. That's all the thing I know. Y'all went from football, quarterback, to motorbike racing.

Y'all would love to go fast. I love to go fast. If you got a knee for speed, go jumping a boat. that boat with that boy that's right the flying flea boys I love speed I get that heart rate up for you yeah that's it um I don't like going fast I don't either I don't especially that's why I stayed right behind you we's going about same speed speed limit 45 we'd go about 42 I got to do 10 laps at Texas Motor Speedway that guy riding with me we got out no way and they looked at me he said so you billed duck calls huh I said

yeah he said you missed it yeah so boring jobs He said, you're going to go fast? I said, I don't know. I ain't never been at that speed. Mm-hmm. I don't like that. But I don't think I missed it. You think you did all right?

I think I've done pretty good. I'm more into building duck calls than I'm going out. Yeah. I just realized that I forgot that my speedometer's off. So I'm really going slower than it says. Mm-hmm. I don't know. Yeah, you're crawling here, but I didn't mind.

I'm out right. Oh, you're that guy. Oh, yeah. And so, like, I'll be, when I actually do go the speed limit, I'm still not going the speed limit. I saw the red light there at Well Road is red. And I was, I was reaching for my phone. I was like, well, I was stopped there. I'm saying, like, I'm five minutes late. Like, ain't no big deal. And then I looked in front of it. It was you. I said, oh, we're good. We're good. We're good. They ain't going to start without half of us. They'll start without one of us. They ain't going to start without half of it.

We even started without Sai, which was an insane idea. Which, by the way, we were five minutes late. The last one we did, side was 40. was 45 minutes late. So, you know, doctor's fault. What, an answer's phone? No. He ain't got a phone.

I ain't got a phone to answer. Hey, Godwin, do you know, size going blind? I say, yeah. I mean, that's a little extreme

for what it is. Every time. Oh, no, it ain't either. Huh? No, he's getting, he's getting his lens shattered.

Hold me, shattered. That's what he said. Hey, I didn't know that's what they did. The guy described. it is kind of like, okay, they're going to go in and like,

just consider this. Look at my eye as a fried egg. With a chisel and a hammer and just... And they're going to bust the yolk. Well, I hope it ain't... You got to be careful because you don't want to get anything busted in the white. I hope it ain't over easy.

You're going to have stuff leaking everywhere. We get some toast and sop it up. No. I don't know. What happened? He just ruined eggs for you? What in the world? Well, no, no, because that's the way the eyeball is. It's a circular deal. Yep, that's true.

And they're going to bust my lens, okay, which is right now, the doctor said, okay, it's hardening, okay? You know, in a couple of years, you won't be able to see nothing. Yeah, yeah. He said, in a couple years, you won't be able to see nothing. Hard-boiled eggs. I said, that's why I'm in here. I like that.

Well, what they're going to do after they bust it? Put it back together? No, they're going to bump it. He ain't humpty dumpy. You know, and then they got to get all the fragments out. How did they do that? He didn't go into that and I'm glad he didn't. I was there with a vacuum?

Well, I don't know. Probably no. Yeah. They probably just, you know. That is. But anyway, then they just put in, they've already measured, okay, the size of what the lens that I need. Matter of fact, all it is is they're putting in...

They put in contacts in your eyes. They're just putting a new contact. But you ain't got to take out. No. Yeah. You're interested? That's what it amounts to. They just stick it in and you're...

What happens? What happens when you... When you... When you... You change subscriptions. Oh, I'm not going to need... No. No more.

He's 20-20. I'm not going to need that. The only thing I'll need is reading license. Made in new... Which one can you read? I test. Can you read that last one? I can read the third line.

T-O-Z. That's it. That's it. What about the next one? No. Well, I lied. L-P-E-D. There you go.

What about the next one? Well, it's got a C, a F, a D on the end, and I don't know what the two are. All right. That ain't too bad. Well, I'd say, I mean, you'd be pretty, bad off if you had to close one eye probably well, no, no. Both of them in glasses, you can almost read it, that's good. You know, when I've done that

he's where you see, I said nothing. It's what you see? It's nothing. It's blurry. He had a big bright light. He said, is that better? No, no. Yeah, he just said, you have trouble at night driving, don't you? I said, oh yeah. You see a fire burst every time a car comes? Oh, no.

You know, I had to slow down real slow. And get home to the right. Oh, just keep going and you got a 50-50 change? No, uh-oh. Not around out there. They'll get out of you, way. Oh, yeah, yeah.

There's too many times I've come around in the curve, and there's a guy in my lane. Yeah, they're usually in a new lane. I'm generally that guy out there. Yeah. Me and. But to why. Because I ain't expecting to see nobody. Hey, me and Martin was going fishing, we was going to the damn it.

Darmine. Ooh. We come around a sharp right-hand curve. Yeah, you're in the far right lane. And a motorcycle came in our life. I just scoot it over a little bit and he came between the grass and the concrete. Right. If either one of them.

I looked at my rearview mirror. He was going. Yeah. If either one of them would have reacted differently. Oh, no, no, no. I was like, I mean, I looked at that motorcycle. He like, he on my side, he on a passenger side of Gobbins truck. Oh, he could have given him a high five.

And I'm like, I'm just looking and I'm like, uh-oh. Oh, I'm counting a number of tires on the truck and the boat. trailer. I'm like, oh, no. I have to get in the ditch. And I just, one morning. My right two tires was in the ditch and I'm like this. You after a deer? No.

And thinking, look, and thinking I'm fixing the flip. So I said, I ain't getting no further. And it's just, oh, I like, grits. Hey, there's an art to hit the deer. Oh, Dan, hey, Red's got it down. Yeah, that's why he welded that hook on the front of it. You can get them and gut them all at once.

You got to get that front end because you don't want to bruise that meat. Oh, yeah. Nope. I actually killed one in Alabama and headshot. What is the legality? He was coming out of a ditch.

If he runs out in front of you. He was coming out in the ditch, okay? As soon as he did, bam, just roll him in the ditch. I'm just going down the road, just hitting my brakes, you know, stand behind him. He slid off and did it.

I just pulled up right and the side, open the back door, threw him in, slammed it, went to the work. Wait, he was in the back of your car? Yeah, back of my, uh, Middibishi. Say that time. Real fast. So you threw a dead deer in the back of your middibishi.

Oh yeah, then I pulled it up into where I worked at the golf course, pulled in the bay, back to the bay, grabbed the chain, pulled him up, well then I got it when the superintendent come in. He said, what in the world are you doing? I said, I'm cleaning this deer, dummy. What do you think I'm doing?

I said, hey, he bent my right fender. I said, he goes in the freezer. Here's a back trap. That's right, hey. But like not in the truck bed, like on the back seat of a vehicle. No, I had a little area there. You had to flip up back seat, and behind that it had a little storage area. Oh, okay.

So it's like a small... I did get blood on my carpet back there. Okay. Well, I mean... Price you got to pay for fresh deer. Oh, hey, look. Probably wasn't the only one. I had a buffer right out of there.

How they'd a buffer right at, boy. A little hydrogen peroxide. Yeah. Were you sure the deer was dead? I didn't care. Oh, you're saying a Tommy boy thing going on? It jumped up. Now, I have...

While you're driving. Oh, no. I think I had a buddy do that. I had a buddy do that. He had one in a car. open the truck. Trunk, threw it in the trunk, slammed it, took off.

Next thing here, when he looked in the back seat in the river mirror, hooves are coming through the back seat. Hey, that deer tore that car up. Was David's favorite? He just pulled off the side road and jumped out. And the deer finally broke the window

and crawled out and run off. What was your friend's name? Callahan. I don't remember what his name was. Hey, he tore his car. His dad named Big Tom? Big Tom. Hey, hit Torres Carl.

Did he sell muffler parts for a little? He may have. Or did he wear a tiny jacket? Were they guaranteed? He may have. Did he wear big hats? Hey, look, I can take a dump in a box of market guaranteed. Uh-oh.

But trust me, a deer coming back to life will tear a car up. Oh, they tear you up, too. Oh, yeah. I guarantee you. Well, I need another, dear. Well, go get you one. Let's take a break, see if he can find you. We got something in the back parking lot.

He's got some in the back parking lot. So, Si didn't get a Christmas bonus? I don't know. I don't have his direct... Yes, I got a Christmas. I don't have his direct deposit information. I'm sure he did. If he had a phone, we could tell.

But if he did, Si, if you didn't, I'm going to give you some of mine. Well, I ain't worried about it either. Me either, but I'm just... Doing all right. Hey, I'm doing all right. What are you doing? Man. All right?

But, I mean, it does... You did quit. So, I mean, do you expect a Christmas ball? No, I'm just curious to wear that. Yeah, duck call business is a little rough now. Finding, finding stuff, sourcing stuff. And, I mean, it's just, it's a lot harder than it used to be. It used to be like two phone calls.

And now it's, uh, now you've got to look. And then you've got to send Guyana into Pennsylvania for a lot of week. Well, that's the funny thing. In the war, in the Iraqi war, I was in, and we was buying two befores, four befores, and plywood. worldwide and could not get enough. Worldwide. Couldn't make enough. What would you do?

What were you doing? Oh. Barring it? Nope. We was putting M1 Abrams on trains and shipping them. Oh, and you needed the plywood. And we need the plywood to brace them up. Yeah. On the trains.

What is that? Yes, tank. M1A, the new tank. That's the fast one, right? That's the one that, you know, they, 4,000 meters, you know, that's what they had said in the book of what they could the kill range was. Wow.

And we had the guy that was in the tank battalion was saying, hey, now, you can double that, Jack. Double it. You can double that running at 70 miles or an hour. You reckon they ever going to make one of them electric? No. I doubt it. Just plug it here.

There's four fish in a tank. one of them said to udden how you drive his thing goblin I gotta let you in on something I don't get that one I got it it went over my head they were in a tank

oh it's how yeah we were just talking about there you go yeah we gotta let you in on something what's that we're thinking it's out

an email came in that let us know that you're getting your material from outside sources that's it well don't everybody It's not your original, okay? Somebody's sending it into. I never heard it.

And look, Cy Clow was calling you out on it. That's it, boys. Hey. And Ray Stevens, too. Do you hear people walking around saying that? Do I hear people walking around? No, I don't hear them. That's what I'm talking about.

And Justin Wilson. You are now. It's entertainment, ain't it? It is entertainment. That's right. Look, when you hear a good one, you got to say it. Oh, yeah. How do you drive this time?

It's like I asked old boy that day. He can't do nothing without Googling anymore. I asked old boy the other day, he's duck hunter. He'd been duck hunting. I mean, if you duck hunt, you know who he is, Jim Ronquist. But I asked him, I said, just messing around when he's talking. I said, you know, what do you think about shooting Mallard Hint? He said, well, he said, if they didn't want him killed, they wouldn't put them on the menu.

That's right. I said, you know, I've never thought of it. You only seen half of Jim. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I remember the other half of him. He's looking good. Yeah, Jim is. That man on a duck call is phenomenal, by the way.

It's, it's like, as a guy who builds him and is pretty proficient with one, he is part mallard hen and it is. Like, I can just sit, no. I can just sit back and listen. Like, no, sigh used to be good. I mean, he old, man. Hey, that's it. He ain't got no air pressure no more.

He don't try to deny it. Hey, C-O-P-D is took his toll. Yeah, he don't try to deny. Look, I've sat in a duck blind and killed ducks at such. Si Robertson called in. You ain't going to hear me griping about it. I mean, it does sound a little funny on the start, but, I mean, he gets there. That's the thing.

That's why I used to laugh when they would say, oh, you just sound like a dying milder, old mildered in. And I said, hey, look, I sound great compared to some of the ducks I've heard call. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And it was. Yeah. I've killed plenty of them, Sae Robertson, been a man on a duck call. Don't hear me griping.

The best one is I hunted with some people in Tennessee. Tennessee. Okay, and we shot down a bunch of ducks, and me and a guy was in the boat going out, picking up cripples and shooting them, they're running them down, and they got the calling. We stopped the boat when we shot the cripples.

Okay, there were going. I know it's illegal to run a motor off. But anyway. That's not how it sounded. No, no. No, we always shut the motor off because it's against the law to run them with the motor. I'd be barred, pig the motor up.

But anyway, they're calling us some ducks. Okay, and I Oh yeah, Bill, Red Dog was with me and I said, Bill, listen. Y'all? And he said, what, what are you hearing? I said, what does that remind you of them calling ducks?

He said, what are you talking about? I said, hey, listen to it and then tell me, you know, I said, you're a dog trainer. I said, you even had beagles running rabbits. I said, now, listen to it again and tell me what you think you're hearing. And he said, oh, I get it now.

He said, it does sound like a pack of beetles running a rabbit. And it was me and on a duck car? And it was me and on a duck car. And look, hey, he was just whew-win the decoys. Yeah. I said, so, hey, the duck call is overrated. Hey, don't say that. Shut your mouth.

I do you. I do you. I'm going to say it after that. Shut your mouth. I like that Christmas bonus. Don't know. No. You got to have them.

No, you need three of them, too. I will say this. Hey, you got to have it to get them in close. Yeah. And I tell you. everybody that you know what duck all's good for to take them from 50 to 20 that's right you don't need it to get a duck to 50 yards you don't need one yeah but to get him from 50 yeah yeah yeah or you can really whack and stack them yeah okay because you want a bunch of 50 green

wing till to be 25 yards doing this and also doing this doing this doing this and then getting real close to that's what they do and that's what they do why don't them tail do that I don't know We're going to move in on a nest of Monday. You want some of that action. Oh, no, you got a film. Never mind. That's right. I do have the film.

I'm available. I would get on some of that action. I know you bought something with this little pop gun. Everybody's always bad mouth. Oh, I love this one. You know what I like about Ron Quay? Because right before he shoots him, he says, got him.

Got them. Got them. Or kill them right there. Got them or let's kill them right. Right here. Yeah. Like Phil says, all right, boys. I need some more soaked in that W-Saw.

Hey, loud. Let's do some damage. Laudy-Bee. It's time. All right, let's take another break. We'll be back right after that. There's another one. Oh, they left.

They make a lot of noise when they're happy. They make a lot of noise in the dark. It makes me realize they ain't real slick. Well, they're happy. Happy, Doug. I make a lot of noise when I'm happy. Yeah, well, here you go. Because.

What does it sound? like, I push it real good. Because I'm happy. God, would you ever download more than them three songs on your iTunes or anything?

Three songs? I've got about 20 on there. Oh, he has upgraded. He's upgraded, you don't have your Spotify wrapped for the year? How about all them people

that sent us their Spotify thing that showed how many minutes they listened to us? I know. The sad part is we were always number two. Uh-oh. Who? Sadie?

Unashame. Oh, One of the same number one? Them other guys. The other guys. This guy just said it one in. They've been listening for like 10,000 minutes. I did the math.

Some people like listen to us for like three weeks of their whole year. Well, yeah. I mean, we're entertained. No, I'm kidding. That's a lot. Yeah. I don't know anything I listen to that long. Other than these ducks on these trail cameras.

Rush. Well, I'll give it to the unshamed boys. Okay. Oh, boy. They put out a lot of good biblical information. They do. even when Al gets stung on the neck by a wall or whatever. Yeah.

That was hilarious. Which I do have to agree with Phil. That is the fastest I have seen him move. Could you imagine? I didn't even know Al Roberts can move that fast. Well, I've seen him get close to that, like when the pie is ready. Yeah. But I've never seen him do it just for no reason.

I got bit by a spider. Uh-oh. Was it a recluse? You got bit? Yeah. Was it a recluse? I don't know what it was, but it stung like I'll get out. Did it?

It did. Can you shoot webs out your hands now? You tried that? No, I can't. I was wanting to. Wrong kind of spotty? I guess so. That's pitiful.

Hey, still don't work. You ought to let a scorpion pop you. A what? A scorpion. Scorping? Right on the back of the neck. No. Right on the elbow.

No. I was out of here. And the least of places you think you'd get popped in bed. What? Oh, yeah. I was rolling over. I was asleep. Now, see, that don't surprise me about you because you have way more probability of getting stung in bed

because you spend the most time there. Like, I would find it hard to believe you got stung outside. Yeah. But anyway, I rolled over. I was asleep. And it was just like someone stuck me with a knife. What state was this thing? Huh?

Louisiana. A scorpion and Louisiana. Oh, yeah, we got them. In your bed? Oh, yeah, we got them. And three days later... Close the door. My chest is hurting.

And I said, good grief, you know. And my wife said, pull your shirt off. And he was thinking, yeah. I said, okay. So I pulled my shirt off and she said, get in the car. Don't ask me twice. Get in the car because you're going to the merchant room. It was just blood vessel red.

Oh, you don't got a blood infection from me? Oh, yeah, I got blood poisoning. Yeah. I got that from a red wasp one time. Sucker stung me on the front of my shin, and then next thing I knew, like two days later, my whole leg went red. I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa.

I've been stung by so many wasps, it ain't even funny. They always get... He popped me on elbow, and it was like this, and then it was all the way coming. It got to the middle of my chest. Yeah, that deal that got on my leg made me uneasy. Oh, yeah. Because it's hot.

Oh, no. Was yours real hot? Yeah, I had a fever, and I mean, hey, I had bad blood poisoning, and it was starting to affect my heart. Yeah, I was thinking, what in the world? Am I really, is a wasp really going to snuff me out? One red wolf? I mean, as many of them things has done dope hot me in my life, but. I thought them things and scorpions was just in the desert.

Oh, no, we got them. I ain't never seen. We got tarantulas, too. Hey, hey, I ain't never seen one of them. It's weird. He's got a blue tone to him. it's shine, you know, shine like a Maller Drake's head.

What's that? That stupid little... Scorpion? Yeah, that's why them black and blue jigs work. No, I'm serious. He's a bad little dude. I've never seen one. He's about an inch and a half to two inches long.

It ain't very big. And he is bad to the bone. It's worse the further west you go. Like, you get out there and him heel, like, yeah, you got them. You start getting hills over there by your house. Hey, if you get on a log. It's rotten.

You start going through the logs is rotten. You'll turn on the hunt. You'll turn one up, I'm telling you, because they end them logs where they got rotten and got soft. Most people get them in their shoes, which you ain't got to worry about because you don't wear shoes. That's it. Here's this dope poppy in between the toes.

That's where it's going to really hurt. Hey, do you talk about a sensitive area? What? Yeah. That's why I don't wear flip-flops. Between the toes. I don't like that. Because I had them big black little bitty bumblebees in the ground.

When we got them crocs, the holes in them? Big black little bitty bumble bees. Oh, no, they've had their bones. But when he's wearing crocs, they can sneak in there. Oh, yeah. You're talking about a hurt. Yeah, I thought he's talking about a yellow jacket. No, this is dirt.

I've run over them. I've run over them things, bush hog, and they'll make you leave a tractor running. That's what I, yeah. A cab on a tractor was invented by a man who got tired of getting eaten up by yellow jackets. I can tell you. I left the track hole, I mean, the back hole run. Mm-hmm. I have to.

I dug into a big, and I mean, it was about that big around in the ground. Oh, they dope out of me. It ain't but about five million of them. Hey, I'll tell you, they come out of there, and they was mad, and they was mad at yours truly. And they paid me off. did you tell them who you was oh no you did i left that area area in a in a heartbeat he told them who they were though talked about their but hey i went back and got them though what'd you take about a five gallons of gas and puss

i gotta be fair there's not much more on this planet more satisfying than after they get you you go in the dark and get them oh yeah you take that gas and then you just you throw that you throw that you throw that match in that hole and you hear them start popping you Popping like popcorn. You're like, yeah, you sucker. I hate them. Tell them, hey, you remember when you pop me? That's about the way it sounded.

Yeah. Pop-a, pop. They can't get out of there fast enough. Can't get away. Mm-mm. They got out. It's over. Hey, go on.

I wonder if you could eat them. Huh? I wonder if you could eat them. I ain't eating nothing to have done that to me. You could eat anything. Yeah. Well, hey. But I don't see where they got much meat on them.

Right. Yeah, but, hey, it ought to be good like a commercial. Like you do. Hey, either one left or right is good because they're both. You roast them. Oh, he's a Twix, ma'am. You roast them, and then you... Are we still talking about bees?

Yes. Roll them in chocolate. When they started popping, I was thinking about popcorn. You can't have that, though. Maybe, uh... Oh, yeah, I found some I can have. Bumblebees is good. Bumblebee.

Sugar-free chocolate. Crispy bumble bees. We got four different conversations going on. Well, we always... I'm trying to hear all of them. Hey, I'm confused. on why anyone would want to try and eat a bumblebee, but... I am curious on God when sugar-free chocolate.

You don't know until you try it. I'll have found it. Sugar-free chocolate. Does it taste like chocolate? It does. It tastes sweet, too. That's a man, I had not real chocolate. Well, that, then you can eat that, right?

She gave it to me. Okay. And you did like Adam and Eve, right? You ate it. I try. Yeah. The keeper of the plans that it's in. almond

chocolate covered almonds that's good I love almonds that was like sugar-free chocolate or something I don't know what it is

but anyway it was she wouldn't give me three of them that just pissed me off I wanted a handful I want the rest of the bowl that just made a mad

y'all wanted the whole handful yeah finally get something good yeah And then all you want to get is three of them. Let me just give you a taste.

Now you got one of them gave me into munchies. I got nothing. I'm going to go home and eat three more of them. That's it. Just out of spite? While she's at work. I might eat six. He's raiding it, boys, while she's gone.

You really want to get her just go home and pour them into something and leave that empty bag. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right, what do you do? Yeah, just see what she does, yeah. put a decoy out there. Oh, man. All right, well, let's take our last break. We'll be back right after this.

Hello at dot callroom.com. Mailbag. Johnny Dee. It made Johnny Dee choke. Oh, he's so fired. We didn't need to ride you all up. All right. What's in there, Sean?

Caden. Caden. Caden emails in from Benton, Kentucky. Benton, Kentucky. Probably Benton, Kentucky. Benton, Kentucky. All right. He's going to graduate high school in a year.

So he's a sophomore or, yeah. Junior. Junior. He's a sophomore or I don't know what he. He's going to graduate high school in a year. And his family wants him to go to college and get what they call. And he uses quotation, a real job. But all I really want to do is live in the woods off the grid on a farm because that's what makes me happy.

Even though I won't have a lot of money, what should I do? My man Caden is 2022. No such thing is off the grid. Unless you end up in the northwest territories in Canada, you own the grid if you're in America. So there's that. He's in Kentucky. Yeah.

There's a grid there. There's a grid. It may not be well connected, but it's there. Kentucky jokes. You know, but no, but I don't think you got to go to college to get a quote unquote real job. I think you can live a life you want to live while earning an honest living and doing all the things. I don't think you can you can't go totally off the grid these days.

Can you? No. You got to have something. You got to have water. You got to have power. Like you're going to go homestead somebody. You know what they call that now? Trespassing.

Like if somebody owns it. But if he had the land. Yeah, if he already had the land. And you just want to live like they did? and old yellow. Yeah. He can get him an auger and find him a well. And, like, I mean, you could go close.

But electricity going to be hard to come by. That's right. Become a hermit. Yeah. You can sell first. Yeah. They don't, that, you're going to have sell a bunch of them. You ain't lying.

The market ain't in them anymore either. So, I don't, I mean. College to me, colleges. College is not for everybody. Yeah. It's either for you or it ain't. Okay. But here's the thing.

I understand what your parents and friends are telling you. Yeah. Okay. If you have a college degree, doors that you normally would not be able without it will not be open to you. The college degree will open them for you where you can go in and apply for a job there. Or these days, trade. Or trade school.

Trade school is a good deal because college is not for everybody. I haven't just remodeled my house, Plumbers, electricians, and the like do very well. I got a plumber and electrician coming in the next week. Hopefully the plumber's coming today. My blind welders make a real nice living. Welters. But I don't think they're telling you to go to college because...

Diesel mechanics who's making the jack. They want you to get a, quote, real job. But if your plan is to go buy and sell fur and eat fish that you catch... I was kind of like that lion feel, hey, we're going to live off love. No, you ain't. You're starving. You're going to starve to.

Like, Kaye isn't the one that said it. No, no, I mean, we think starved that. But I recommend finding something you're interested in, and I think any of those trades, too, well, can help you live a life that you want to live. It may be a 40-acre farm back in the middle of nowhere with your own house and all that, but you've got to have some way to pay for it.

That's right. And that's, you know, that's just what is. He can't live off the land when it's trespassing. Yeah, it's trespassing now. There's no such thing. I mean, it's somebody on. I think the Bible says it just way. Work with your hands. Okay. So that you will not have to depend on anyone. Yeah, that's right. Exactly. 100%. Okay. That's what I encourage you to do. But, oh, hey, if you, whatever you want to, you love to do, if you can do it and make a living at it, you consider yourself very lucky. by man.

Yeah. And you're a junior. Remember. Yeah. You're in the best time of your life currently. Enjoy it, man. No responsibilities. Yes.

Enjoy it. Don't be in a rush to figure out what's next for crying out loud. For crying out loud. Enjoy being a junior and senior in high school. Yeah. Man. Amen. All right.

All right. I'm going back to those Instagram question because we got, we just got a ton of them. And somebody, this is a lot of them. This one airs right before Christmas, I believe, and she's struggling with gift ideas for men for Christmas. And we're all men. Hunter fishing. I actually posted a video on this last night.

Did you? I was thinking about doing the same. Yeah, I did a video on it on my YouTube channel. Here's my deal. Dunk Commander Neatutes. I recommend them. Hey, gift cards. Huh?

Gift card. You're a gift card, man? Hey. Duck call. Buy duck call. That way they can buy what they really want. He's a gift card. SOTOMS and underwear.

He's a BNM pole. Sox and underwear. Well, some people are not big in the socks and underwear. No, give the gift to Tommy John's, huh? Cropy magnet bait. Well, hey, that ain't a bad gift. I'm all the world. Okay, but I'm just saying,

you can't go wrong with a $100 or $200 gift card. Heavy shot. That way, then they can go buy. Who, Honda? Do buy. And if they lose it, the people that run the store just win. And now, if I don't get that from me for Christmas, I'm going to be upset. Yeah.

I would say, though, I'm going to go gift card. Real tree camouflage. He's still talking. Real tree camouflage. Old NASCAR over here. It's just reading off his shirt. Shrimp kebub, shrimp cabob, shrimp salad, duck picker, duck call. Right.

Picker, duck call. Honeyhole, hat. No, anyway. Banali shotgun. She better really love this guy for a bit. Hit balls grill. What else you got, Guy? We'll keep rolling him out there.

F-250. Garcia Reel, Rod Reels. No, no. No, he's being him, man. He's being him, boy. I would say. Orsia man, Osamano's pretty good. What's you going to say, Sean?

He hadn't said anything I disagree with. It can't help you get. No, I was going to say, because it's tough to shop for, like, the guy, like, you know, like when you shop for your dad or something, and he's like, if he wants it. He already got everything? Yeah. Like is our company meeting trying to figure out what to get Willie Robertson for? A little snuffer bottle, you know, you can take you in deer hunting. Yeah.

Yeah. I wasn't going to say that. But I've always found food is the way to go. Uncooked or cooked. Yeah. A moink box? Something like that Godwin

How happy would you be If I went by the Gene Cox meat market And just brought you two big old Tomahawk Ribyes That you can make chili with And just handed it to you

Uncooked That's what Willie does With all the big premium meats We buy him for Christmas He makes either chili or soup Wouldn't you be happy Wouldn't you be like This is the best gift ever

He bought me two steaks I didn't even cook them I'd cook them. Exactly. And you'd hold on to that handle tight, wouldn't it? All that bone. Just gnaw on it. But that's what I, every year, my dad, I'm like, I'm just going to give them some sort of food that's not cooked.

Yeah. I mean, I think that's a solid one. And the other deal, like, if they like to cook or something, just go to, go to not necessarily Walmart, but like somewhere that sells seasonings and just go down the seasoning aisle. Because you know what I ain't ever been mad at? A can of seasoning. I'll try them all. Real tree bow hangers, they pretty good. God was just going through what's on his back seat.

That's all he's doing. Everything God was a Christmas tree cakes. But everything you've said. Them hoax bows are pretty often. You don't even need because you already have all of it. Yeah. Well, she wanted gift ideas. That's what I'm saying.

But if I was to get you one of those, you'd be like, oh, thanks. You know, another thing I love. You know, another thing I love for turning them Yeti buckets. Scratch off lottery tickets. Those are always fun. I love them. I love them. Bucgets are pretty cool.

This guy. And now hold that Yeti coffee thing, too, in the bottom and clothes. Well, he is flying a company flag hard today, son. I like it. I'm going to say, keep sending them bonus checks. Watch me. Watch me. I'm just going to be out here waving it.

Waving all the flag. You ought to see my truck. Oh, that's terrible. That is fun stuff. But think simple. Guys aren't that hard to please. No, everybody says like you're super hard to buy a gift for it.

No, I'm not. Look at what I like. Take a guess. Or buy me, you know. Double cross hooks. Some chicken tenders that aren't even cooked. Chicken tins, spans. Just go to the grocery store.

Some of these right here. Kings, boys. Oh, another one. That's a stock. That's a stocking stuff. I really, one of my first. favorite things. A belt.

A belt. Groove belt. Look, listen to you. But no, what I'm saying, no, what I'm saying, it doesn't have to be groove. Here's, I think there's other companies that make them. Hey. But they're stretchy. I'm glad you meant. Stretchy belt, just like stretchy pants.

That's it, boys. It done what it was supposed to do. You got your finger caught on something? I hung it on the side of the duck blind jumping out of the, where you crawl in, the door. It hung on a piece of wood. Oh, your ring. and broke. And it didn't rip your...

Just like it's supposed to. And it didn't rip your finger. I'd have had a broke finger or, boy, you're talking about pulling the bark off of it. The bark's gone. I got to give me another. I don't know that. That's nice sense. Well, that's juiced.

He's got jukew or that for a while. I've had this one. Yeah, this is one of the first ones I ever had. Yeah. It's like eight years. I might have to get me another. I got some. I got some in my office.

There you go. But, no, I'd say that kind of stuff. Like, guys are, at the end of the day, don't overthink what a guy want. Like, they're a good duck commander cap and timber camoos. There you can't be. Or. Fly eagle. You're going to roll.

Just a giant hat in general. It's just a giant hat. It's funny because it's bigger than a normal hat. And if you have to wrap that thing, they're going to think they're getting something really cool. That's right. Really good. And when they take that out, you can look at their sheer discipline. appointment on their face of it's a giant hat.

Or you can flip it over and turn it into an offering plate. It could fit a lot of money in there. All right, Johnny D. I'll send us out of here. Sae already alluded to the verse of the day. First Thessalonians 4, 11, and 12, and make it your ambition to lead a quiet life. You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders in that suit.

And so that you will not be dependent on any. love it. Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. I'm going to keep saying that because I don't know when these things are. Merry Christmas. And happy New Year. Happy New Year.

And look, if we're that far ahead, happy Valentine's Day for trying out. We'll see y'all next time right here. We're out. I love you.