Duck Call Room - Godwin Was NOT a Fan of the ‘Duck Dynasty’ Scotland Trip

Episode Date: March 18, 2025

Uncle Si discovers that electrical capers are a rite of passage—at least for him and his buddies. Godwin reveals the worst part of the 'Duck Dynasty' trip to Scotland, and the guys embark on a culinary journey to explore the best and worst foods from around the world. John-David and Si bond over their love of German cuisine, while a creepy creature story captivates Si’s imagination. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I'm going to Buckees tomorrow night. I'm just the side. We're going to six flags on Saturday. Six flags. Hey, hold on. Do you remember when you, how many times did you go to six flags as a kid? How probably been? That's it?

Yeah, once a Dallas and once three times. But you remember all them rich kids that had the flash pass? Then you were like, man, if only I could afford that. All then? $25. That's, oh, now. What was holding us back, man? just get a side job.

$25 a lot of different back in. Well, yeah, but. $25 back in was like four hours of work. I ain't doing it. He said, I ain't. Anyway. Oh, what are we? Oh, we're rolling.

You were rolling on that, huh? Welcome back. Rolling, rolling, rolling. Keep them dogies going. Roblin. Gobblemen spend a lot of time alone. No, he's not. Every time I see Goblin, he's got somebody fishing with him.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Godwin. I'm going to have to get Galvin like a Photoshop thing. What's that? That way when you take in pictures at that boat ramp, we can put you anywhere. I don't care where they see me.

I know you don't, but for the rest of us that don't get to go every day. My favorite part is I can follow along with Galvin, like with my logs that I kept from fishing. I look at the ramp, I'm like, yeah, it makes sense. You just go back and look and fish. They do the same thing, the same time every year.

They kind of doing it weird this year, though. That's just because you dare every day. Weird water. Weird water. Weird weather. But I've been on water before and the lightning come by. Mm-hmm. And I mean, your hair on your hands and arms and your head.

Yeah. I've watched it pick my... That's when I said, hey, crank it over. When you know as close as when it picks your line up off the water. That's when you're like, all right, yep, nope, we're dead. We're good. You just let go of everything. Yeah, drop everything.

Like, we got to go. Yeah. It will. It'll take your line and, like, lift it up off the water. It's crazy. We used to have a light fishing rod up in the honeyhole that somebody was fishing with. They got hit by lightning. They gave it to y'all.

Yeah. But then they took it back at some point. That's pretty, yeah, probably when they died. I mean, I'd have put that in my casket. You didn't get me the first time, and I'm taking you with me, son. That's weird. Light. The kid, well, Al then was out on Phil's property.

the owl was over there leaning against a fence post and I mean way over there and the lightning hit it way over there and it slapped him off of that post who wow wow really and look he was touching the wood part he didn't one touch it in the battle that thing hit that fence

and pop that's way worse than paying on the electric field and it slapped him and I flipped him I've only been electrocuted one time and I said I had never doing that again. Every kid that was in computer class was mad at me because they had to start over on all their work because it got deleted. Yeah. And my teacher said, I thought you were the student that was going to be dead.

That's right. Like the first one died in the classroom on me and I was like, well, I didn't. But I shook up. I was pale. You all mess with it in the morning, do you? I don't even have wall sockets in my home. Yeah, see, that's a covered them all up. That's just 110 too.

Imagine if you got hit with 220. Yeah. No, it hurt. You'd probably, you went, yeah, that barrier. 220, you'd be telling a different story. Yeah, they'd be there. Yeah, you'd probably, your three kids would probably be adopted. Yeah, the kids would be telling them story.

Dad wouldn't be there. I was only 16. They're 15 when I did it. Oh. Did you get any superpowers? A lot of time when people do that thing, like fly. You would think it would have made me be able to sit still. But that actually is why all the people that say John David can't sit still and moves too much,

That's actually why I'm nervous. I'm going to get shocked. Well, at least you charged up on life. I'm ready. I've had a full battery ever. You got a full charge, boys. Yeah, he's ready to go. A guy when you ever been bit?

No, never. Well, I mean, I have. Unfortunately, I have. Trying to unhook that electric fence or something. Yeah. And this is one thing. Did you pee on one growing up? No.

You didn't fall for that trick? No. Yeah, I did. Oh, yeah, I did. I went, I thought every young redneck speed on an electric. fence before. I mean, I thought that's part of it. Does that happen? Does it hurt? I mean, depending on how quick you are.

It'll give you a joke. The good thing is you do it when you're a kid, when you got a good arch and string. So like, you can get away from it. Like if Si tried to do it right now, he'd be it. So, yeah, it'd just, you know. He'd have to stay the other side of the pit. Well, he'd have to straddle it, you know, more. Like, but when you're a kid. But it wouldn't be a constant stream, so he'd be fine. Yeah. I mean, he could probably be a good. It'd have to jump. You know, like... No, this is what you don't do as a kid.

Yeah. Okay, you know the little chain that they got that you click the light bulb on with? You don't get up on the sink. And do that? Okay, grab it and click it, stick it up. No, because when you do, it's just going to be swinging. Really? Oh, yeah, I was actually flying.

You got... You couldn't let go. Yeah, that thing was just biting you and you couldn't let go. The chain finally broke is the only thing that broke the circuit. Nowadays, the way they built. A little cheap chain. Yeah. Wow.

But it slung me around that thing about three times before it broke. Yeah. Nowadays, the whole ceiling fan would come down if that happened. They don't build stuff like they. I got Brittany when we were dating. She had never been around electric fence. She wouldn't pee on it. But I gave her a, you know, I gave her like a...

This story sounds widely inappropriate. No, I gave her a long piece of beha grass. And I said, tell me if that fence is hot. I said, just lay that thing on there. You know, you'll... Watch it. It'd just get a little warm. me and watch it.

That thing bit her, son. I knew it was high. I mean, I'm going to plug it up. I plugged it up for I did it. Yeah, you just got to test people and see what they do in certain situations. When I tell you, I don't. Like somebody telling you to pee on a fence. Anytime somebody says, test, you take the, do the test, no.

Yeah. I'll watch you do it for. Or sticky tongue to a nine-volt bag. Show me. Hey, I'll watch you do it. You ever done that? I've done that. Yeah.

Put a nine-volt battery on you time. I've done that. Yeah, that may be a bite you. too. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Hey, let's do it on here. You took him smelling sauce.

Let's let you lick a nine volt. No. I'll do a lot of things. I tried to eat buying a sausage. I'm sure we can find a teaser in here. Stop it. If you tase me, I will hurt you. Won't you get up?

Don't tase me, don't tase me. No, the electricity is one that's like. Yeah, you might. It might reverse what he's got. Yeah. That could. Yeah, I mean.

I don't fool nothing. I can't see. Yeah. Yeah. You can't see electricity. You got a batch of crap out of you. Oh, yeah. You don't even know what's there.

The worst is if you like, you know, when you, when you were growing up, we didn't have nothing new, like, boat wise. So you'd have a wire with a short in it and you wouldn't think nothing of it. And you'd reach down there and grab something, that whole boat bite you. Like, you know, you got 12 bolts. You know, you just. Had that happen. Yeah.

And you can't figure out where the power pool is until you're doing that. Yeah. Until the shock just gets stronger. You got to, like, touch it every something. You're like, all right. right there. Whatever it is, right down that pile. Oh, man.

Fans listening on YouTube, please. Send us an electrocution story. If you can not like a, yeah, not like a terrible one, but like everybody's been bit by something, like I would think. At some point in your life, you. Yeah, if it's like a horror story, we don't. Yeah, I ain't really. We want the idiot kid in sophomore year high school

that shut the school down for like 20 minutes. Yeah, the P-N-on-Electric fence kind of story is not, You know, not some of them other ones. Like our friend Chad. Chad. Johnson. He got bit. What'd he do?

He fall through. Oh, yeah. Was he one to one that fell through? Oh, he was a lineman. Yeah. He was a lineman fell on it. Like, if you look at his arms, they thought he was dead. Yeah.

We don't want those stories. Well, we might want those stories. Well, if you survived and had a, you know, life-changing experience about it. I'm interested. Or if you got some cool superpowers. Chad didn't get any superpowers. I don't know. He can catch him fish now on the by running nets and stuff.

You can do that. I don't know if he was. was doing that before. Well, that was, yeah, but that was a God ministry. Yeah. Fishing was. Yeah. People, people don't realize, okay,

if you use nets and trot lines, hey, that is a whole lot of work. Especially if the fish, you know, if your faith phase off with fish. Fish are heavy. Because, yeah. Then you got to clean them. That's what I feel in his younger days.

His forearms was twice as big as his bicep. Popeye. He looked just like Popeye and Salar Man. The sailor man? The sailor man? He got it. It's going away. I'm serious.

His arm, look, take John's from his elbow up to his hand, and then it would be twice as little his bicep would be. That's the way Jackson flexes when I say, show me your muscles. You go like yes. He don't get them up like. Yeah, go like that. And Waylon just go. I ain't quite figured that out yet.

Oh, that makes me laugh. That's good time. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means. That means more outside cooking. And y'all know we love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Triedale's beef

makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good? It's so good. It's our friend, Sao Robertson, would say, buy on the grill! Look, before we got Tritels, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes from. But with Tritels beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way.

Tritels comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch. So they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living,

you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Tritale's beef. I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a she doesn't eat meat. She ain't a big meat either, folks. Yeah. Just go to Tribalienable. beef.com slash that's try beef.com slash

support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. Bill cut grooves pulling hoop net up. I've seen them. That I could put my finger in and you could lay a ruler flat on the metal. Well, no, no, because I just couldn't believe it when we'd go up and down the river. Like, he's just tying these things to stumps under and everything. how do you remember he had a photostatic memory I wouldn't have been able to fire half of him next

no still can't well I found some of them with a crankbait the most impressive part of this is I thought sigh made up a new sigh word in the middle of that called photostatic memory yeah that's just the word is it I thought it was photographic memory I just tried to fact check you and I was once again proven wrong I miss pronounced it as why no you pronounce it right I thought you did, and I was like, what is a photostatic memory? It's essentially the same thing as a photographic memory. Is it also called like an idetic memory?

Yeah. Well, he can read something. Phil, look, Phil can read something. And never forget it? Three weeks, y'all. He could actually quote that. I mean, word for word. He could.

I couldn't believe me and Daniel Edwards. and somebody else, I can't remember who it was. We went tail hunting over in the creek. And Phil, you know, he ain't hunted it, and I don't know how long. And he took off wide open in that boat, going here, making it here, and he goes, oh, they're close together right here, and he squeezed through and got, and when he let off the gas in that second slew, he bumped the stump. He said, well, that's pretty good for 12 years.

Oh, no, no, no, he used to. Look, look. But he looks up in the trees for his... No, no. I was riding, okay, and I'm, I'm, my back, boats forward, okay? I'm, you know, looking backwards. Uh-uh. I don't do that.

Look, this is early, no lights. We've got a moon. We go out, get the boat, crank it up. He's got at the steer, okay? wide open with 20 oarsmarking on a 14-foot aluminum boat and from Phil's house all the way the second flu blind, duck blind. And I'm looking behind the motor.

We're running that creek wide open, which is really fast. And look, he's missing stumps like this big around. As the boat goes by, the wave pushes the water away from it and you can see the stump. He's six inches. if he'd hit it, we'll all have probably died. That's the same one you hit.

It said it wasn't there yesterday. Oh, yeah, and told the motor up. Yeah. Yeah. It ain't nothing worse than a drunk stump. Stagging out before you're going. Yeah. I said, that thing wasn't there yesterday.

Wasn't there yesterday. I was like, man, that river had been flooded for a hundred years. It's been there. Look, but for, I did figure out how that happened. Okay. That thing is the, it's a tree. okay just died well look it was I did go through there the day before but there's just right right down the middle there's an opening I went through there right and the motors right

through the old well the second time I did it I was a little too far to the right and that's where that lower unit lives yeah that's when you hit that stump yeah we should have checked it last time they drained the river see if that lower unit was still stuck in that Oh, they still got the gates open. When their water goes down. Look, I got fish scales all open. Oh, I felt terrible for you. A man that fishes and clays fish?

Yeah, that happens. I got 12 crappies in my live whale right now. Oh, 12 crappies. Well, how was your trip you just went on? Are they? You went and saw. Are they scared? Dale Holla.

Dale Holla. That was awesome. Where was that at? I told you. It's on the Tennessee. Kentucky line. Kentucky line. Yeah.

Some of it is in Kentucky. River? Lake. Lake. Beautiful. Yeah. This Cumberland River. It was kind of muddy, but it was. Si, if you ever... It would be green.

If you ever get invited to go fish that pot, Del Hollow Lake is one of the coolest places. Maybe the coolest place in the country. Yeah, I like it. Maybe the cool. Well, as far as lakes go. That was a, that was, I'm just, we got to take a time out. If you're going to call something the coolest place in the country,

country. Godwin, how many, how many houses are on that lake? Good, man, I've seen Luke. Yeah, but what I'm saying is, like, right up on the bank.

There ain't no. Oh, not on the bank. You can see them. You can see them on a hillside, but like they got no shoreline construction around there except for however many marinas they got on the place. And that's it.

So, like, it's like pristine all the way around. Like, it is just a really cool place. Well, I don't know what lake it was, but do divers. was double tanks. Mm-hmm. They went down to inspect the dam.

Well, they went down, then they come up, took the stock, was taking their equipment off. The guy that was, the state guy that was there said, hey, what's going on? And they said, we ain't going back down. He said, wait a minute, you got, you got to check. He said, we ain't doing it. You got to find somebody else. Come on now.

No, I'm serious. There was sharks. The guy asking them, what's the problem? Sharks. He said, well, we got on the body. and we're against the wall of the dam and we're going with the light, you know, inch by inch checking it.

He said, and then we get this weird feeling that we're being watched. And he said, and we turn around and shine the light. And he said, there's about eight catfish that could swallow me. And these were pretty good-sized fellows. These ain't a little guy.

He said, there was eight catfish behind us. just sitting there suspended and he said and they could eat me and these two tanks and they probably wouldn't even touch the side of their throat he said this thing look he said this thing was like this big

around the thing his name wasn't Jonah I was about saying we technically don't know Jonah could have been eating by catfish I was watching a TV show one day and they was in the Amazon River somewhere uh-uh you don't get in Amazon

look and they catch a catfish you stay on the boat Look, and there's three of them standing in the shallow water with him at their belly. One of them's got his head. The other one's got his in the middle, and the other one's holding his tail. And this thing is about, oh, hey, he would be, look, I'm telling you, you could lay him on this table, his head would be over this end, and his tail would be over that end.

They got a weird tail. And hey, look here. And I'm serious, this thing was like that big around. Purdy, they're purdy. Oh, yeah. And he was, he was, he was, he was double colored. Yeah. He was like a op that's got the yellow and brown spots.

But this one, this one was straight. It wasn't on, it wasn't on dots. I've seen him. His top of him was brown and the belly was yellow, bright yellow. Beautiful fish. But they get, hey, depending on the food source, I don't tell you, I don't know how big they'd get. That's like the whales.

Yeah. Railways two tons. Yeah. If they get big, like, you know, when you see them feeding, it's amazing to watch them when they feed on Creole, I think is the name of it. It's like a crawfish.

There's... Photostatic memory. Triands of them in the water. And then the whale goes out, and his gills are like a big balloon. Mm-hmm. Well, they just go through the big school of krill. And then the water goes out,

then they swallow them. Yeah. Eat them. Oh, that's why I watch. Eat them like a box of a herd. I like to chew my food. Yeah. Well, don't chew his.

Yeah, I wouldn't like just go running. I mean, what if you just went through a buffet with your mouth open? Whatever you got, you got. Yeah, whatever you get, just, whatever you got. What you got. Sounds like a make-a-wish trip. That sounds like a good time. But what if there was like a big hunk of blue cheese you suck up or something?

What if there's something in there you don't like? I don't want no blue cheese. That's what I'm saying. What's y'all got against blue cheese? I don't know. I don't know. It's not great. That took home.

I don't either. I ate a family meal from Wingstop last night and I just got ranch instead of blue cheese. I legitimately ate a whole family meal. I don't even like ranch much. It was $30. I like $1,000. I'm with you. I don't know.

Or there's like four different conversations. Or Romalon. Including the one in my head. Thousand Island. Thousand Island is like ketchup and ranch mixed together, isn't it? No, it's just mayo. It's sweet. Pleat.

It's mayonnaise. Thousand Island or rum a lot. Manny. Galvan ain't scared to jump on a mayonnaise base. Tartar. Are that, uh... Hey, I just looked up Thousand Island. It's an American Canadian salad dressing and condiment.

Yeah. From Whitington, New York, the Thousand Islands region. It's where it comes. St. Lawrence River. Photostatic. memory everywhere. What did you say? Just saying.

Thousand Island dressing came from upstate New York, where St. Lawrence River is. Thousand Islands. That's where it got its thing. All right, good vinegaruettes. Where did cocktails? Oh, no, no. Oh, you don't like vinegar? Oh, yeah.

No. Gives and that's like a hamburger. Why do they call it a hamburger when it's made out of beef? Hey, I don't know. That's a good question. Because it comes from the ham of the cow? I would have cocktail sauce every day. Maybe.

No, I'm with you on that. Oh, yeah. That green stuff you get with you sushi. Yeah, but you got to make it yourself. What's that green stuff you get with you sushi? Wasabi. Wasabi. Because the cocktail sauce in a jar doesn't clean out your sinus.

That's actually what I need right now. I need one shrimp. That's it. And my mom's cocktail sauce. And I won't sneeze again for three days. Exactly. to tickle your nose. Oh, your brain.

Yeah. It's like four parts horseradish, one part ketchup, and a dash of Worcestershire and lemon. That's all you need. See, that sounds like just this side of it. Hey, look. Don't go. Like what?

Horse radish. I don't know how y'all do it. Don't go light on the lemon juice. I would eat a spoon full of horse radish right now just to open up my sinus. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I feel like we should have left that radish to the horses. I could eat a whole of.

That gender dressing's good. Yeah, ginger ain't bad. I usually, if there's any left in the bowl, after everybody's ate all the shrimp, I just take a spoon, I eat, the cocktail sauce? Oh, yeah. You're spooning cocktail song?

Oh, yeah. Well, yeah. Eat it with a cracker. Yeah. Hey, I eat it just with just that. I do love it. Oh, it's good. Now I got to go get some.

We got to make it yourself the problem. Oh, yeah, you got it. Oh, no, you got that. That jarred stuff. Oh, I got the ingredients in the. and the refrigerator door. Yeah. Don't skip on,

don't go skipy on the juice, the lemon juice. The jar stuff is okay, but you have to add like a whole jar of horseradish to it. Yeah. Yeah. You do.

Yeah, that's too, too, uh, Hunter's worried about our sauce. They're too tame. You got to get wild with that, with that sauce.

I don't like. Do you have the ingredients to do it right now? Like in the documenters? No, that is how. Ridges? Yeah. We just carry horseradish around on.

Hey, you do a lot of cooking here. You do a lot of fish. Hey, as much as this man eats horseradish, it wouldn't surprise me for any something out there in his Yeti. Yeah. For his boat snacks. That's right.

Like, this guy wouldn't just reach over there and take a pull out of that jar. What's that? You got to get the creamed horse radish. What's one you get? Prepared. That's what it is. I knew it had an adjective. It's prepared horseback.

Yeah. I knew there was an adjective. I couldn't remember what. Because I don't shop in that section. If you go over to Captain Avery's, you can get the extra hot horse radish. Oh. There's different levels of it. be you tell them it open your time or is there just more of it there's more of it but

i think it's a little hotter but the prepared stuff at the brooksers or the super one yeah it's got it's cold you ain't just bind it off the shelf it's refrigerator why's it got to be cold because it's prepared what's it's prepared i forget what it's called it's a got a funny name but it's in a jar about that dog are you talking about the white one it's like it's from germany or so yeah yeah yeah that one that's the best one that's a good one you know Here at the, Engelhoffer. Engelhofer. This one?

Say that. Say that. One. Thick and creamy horseradish with grated horse radish root. But you get to prepare, not that. You know you're from a certain type of person when somebody says, you know that horse radish. It's a funny name, and I knew exactly what Godwin was talking about. Oh, no, that's like that's Brockworth.

Ooh. Excellent. Red and white. Both. Brought words. That's the one, Gailman. There you go. That's the one I use a lot.

Yep. Brought worse. We can pull that back up here. I'm just curious on something. Savory, full body, pairs well with Bloody Mary's, mashed potatoes. Why would you ruin mashed potatoes? Oh, man. Prime rib, roast food, oysters.

Hold on. Put it on you. Glutin free. Keep refrigerated. Why does it have to be refrigerated? I'm confused. Oh, I know why. Why?

The ingredients is too powerful. If you don't, it'll grow mold. Yeah. I've got a red salsa that I buy and I ate some of it and left it out. I throw it away. Johnny Dees bought that three times from Walmart. Yeah, I just realized that, and I don't even. Last purchase on December 20th, 20, 24.

This is my mom's account. Hi, Janice. Oh, this is my mom's Walmart account. Everybody now is judging me hard. Let's order some stuff. We used to share a Walmart account because we live right beside each other. Why have two accounts to ship to the same place? There you go.

Yeah. Also, why not let you mom pay for groceries if you will? What would you compete over? I just don't understand why it's got to be. Most things in a jar don't have to be refrigerated until they're open. That's why I was trying to figure out what was doing it. Sausage. And so who the king is.

That's not. Who? Oursage. Earl Campbell. Sauced. Jimmy Dean. No. I'm talking about, hey, I'm talking about what.

The sausage king is the character from Ferris people. Duhler's Day Off named Abe Foreman. The best, the best. The best sausage is German. Really? Hold on. As a man who spent a week in Germany one time. Germans,

I went and bought, it was the weirdest thing ever. So I'll ask for you to back me up on this. I bought a big old sausage, a big old pretzel, and then they had this special mustard. Oh, yeah, hot mustard. And the mustard came in a toothpaste package.

Oh, yeah. and it was amazing. Oh, that's why I can't, I can't even think of the name of them, but they've got them. It's like a food truck. Well, they're mustard in tooth pouches.

They've got millions of them. It's like a little small food truck. Yeah. They do Brockworth's red and white. Now you got me one of them. Oh, I know. It all goes back to food. This is the greatest sausage in the world.

I actually went in one of their, stores. Yeah. Oh, hey, the meat section is half of the store. That's it. They make the greatest sausage there is. There it is. Germans do.

Oh, they do. It was good. I'm serious. What you Google, German mustard and a tube. Yeah. It was literally in a toothpaste tube. And to get the rest of it, you had to roll it like a suitcase. Oh, and it's the same thing where he's talking about if you got a little bad cold.

Yeah. Hey, put that on a sausage in a new place. eat it, you ain't got no cold or more. Oh, it's hot. This baby I'll get rid of. Hey, you'll be at the table eating the sausage, and you're going to need a towel to wipe the sweat off your brow. Look, Dusseldorfer.

It's Dusseldorfer lawn sniffs, extra shot of very hot mustard. Original for sure. And it is, it is. I'm in on that because I get eggs. Oh, no, no, that's great stuff. Fairland. I mean, good. Look, this is how you know it's good.

It's going to take a month to get to me from Amazon. And it's $10. Hey, but it'll be worth it. $10 for two ounces. $558 ratings. Oh, look how terrible that looks. Yeah, that's it. Some of the reviews, it was the food they were putting it on that looked terrible.

That's what we ate for dinner in Germany. Sausage and mustard? Sausage. We ordered two Brockworths, one red, one white, with the mustard. Which one do you like better? Uh-huh. Red or white? Both of them.

Both of them? Excellent. Yeah. You and Christine like split one or something? Oh, no. Y'all each eat half or not. I'm saying each.

He had to buy her a couple because I'm going to eat two or three. Ah, okay. It's a big guy. I don't believe you that. No, no, it's like the pizza that I come up on at a restaurant. Or like two or three dozen. Yeah. I'm trying to figure out.

Hold on. You know, you got to think about it. I ordered three 14-inch pieces and I would roll them up like a hot dog. I got it, gang. Yeah, what? This one's not as hot, but it will be here on what day is that? Sunday. We'll order some.

And then bring some sausage in there, we'll eat it. Buy now? Buy some hot Jimmy Dean sausage. Martin, you're in charge of the sausage. I'm bringing the mustard. I understand the mustard. Ordard some hot, hot Jimmy Dean sausage. All right.

We'll cook them up and have breakfast. I got toothpaste mustard from Germany on the way. There you go. What? I mean, do you know this to be with? complain about the world right now. We just sat here and said, remember toothpaste mustard from Germany? Yeah. Okay, it'll be here

Sunday. That fast. Technology is wonderful. Thank you. Hey, I wish I could order to be a hundred than Brockworth. Oh, man, that's good. You can. You can. It says, how much money do you want to spend?

You can. That exists. I will say, we stopped at a German meat market outside of San Antonio. Yeah, apparently that's a big German settlement down in San Antonio. Yeah, yeah. And the name was called like Jukes or something. I mean, it felt German.

It felt very German. And they were known for something like basically raw hamburger meat dish that you ate with a cracker. It was raw hamburger meat. They, it looks like hamburger meat. They said it was ground rabbi. It looked like hamburger meat by the time they got done with it. I'd just say that, and then you ate it on a cracker raw. Like, basically, essentially,

if you'd go to a restaurant and order steak tartar. Well, no, no, because I actually seen that now down in New Orleans. And then I took a bite of it. And once I got past the fact I was eating raw hamburger meat. No, you can't do that. Yeah, I ate it on a salteen cracker. Yeah, I couldn't have. But it was okay.

I mean, I didn't see why people would stop and get a slab of it every day. But, like, you know, when in Rome or in this kind of, case went outside of San Antonio. Germany's a weird place. Yeah, I didn't realize there were so many Germans, like, outside San Antonio. It is a, that's a weird place. You can go to a meat market and a taco truck. Red and white Brotworth?

Red and white Bratworth. Yeah. I don't know what that is this. This is red in color and, yeah, white color. The Bratwurst itself is red and white? Yeah. Don't ask me. It's just a big sausage.

One of them is white, one of them's red. the whole thing you know a lot of times people you're thinking of them Wilson weenies no them's pink yeah yeah this is a reddish pink poppers

I can buy you this very weird t-shirt that's red and whites hey we can be red Waldo I ain't worried about a t-shirt I wanted your Brunkworth I'm looking I'm an authentic German Bratworth how long's it going to take to get here

Hey I'll buy that Just yeah hoping I need to talk to a guy at the meat center. At the what? At Brooksers. Maybe he's got German Brockworth and I just don't know it. That's why I said, look up who steals the king of sausage. And in my humble opinion, it would be Germans.

Okay, because that red and white Brockworth. I just can't wait to have a toothpaste. No, that's what, look, I ate that for dinner, and I was over it, 12 and a half years. I was the dinner every time. I was there a week, and I just kept that toothpaste and mustard in my back pocket the whole time, just in case. You put the mustard on the sausage or the pretzel?

I put it on everything. So you get, hey, was it Franks? It was Franks mustard? Well, it was a. You can get a soft one. You get a soft bun to put your sausage on, or you get the hard bread to get you. What was the purpose of the pretzel and the sausage beside each other? It was both good.

I just ordered one of everything that the man was selling, sir. Oh, okay. It wasn't like, get this pretz. It's not like... No, no, no. They weren't like the first ones tried like chicken and waffles and like, oh, man, that's cool. They might have been. Yeah.

Hard to say there was a language barrier. I was just pointing at things I wanted. Oh, okay. I got you. Foreign grocery stores trip me out, though. When you're over there? It's like worth going. That's...

If I ever went back to Europe in any way, I would be most excited about the grocery store. Oh, no. What's the deal about the grocery stuff? They got weird, like they put their mustard in toothpaste tubes. That's crazy. Yeah, that is wild. And so you buy it, you're like, this is really good, but why was it in a toothpaste tube? Well, because they off the microplastics, man.

Have you been to the Saigon market in Munro? That sounds like an oxymoron. The Saigon market? What is it? Saigon market in Munner. I think I'm saying it right. Have they got ducks and all that hanging up? I don't think so.

What's a Saigon? Oh, this ain't a true. I mean, it's got to be some kind of Oriental market. Yeah. Saigon market and, well, and then there, you know. There should be fish laying out both both with ice and with ice on them. There is. Okay.

Have you been? Some of them you don't put ice on them. They like sardines. What do you, Sondar, what do you go to the Saigon market for? better tasting ramen snacks oh he's getting the real ramen oh no no noodles that that that that stuff at Walmart that's like a quarter that ain't real ramen stuff to you don't say you don't say look ramen is not because you like it from Walmart cheap it's because that's what you got got yeah that's I mean as a guy who ate a lot of ramen in his life there's some big time where a 25 cent pack of noodles is a necessity

Game. Light up some wienies and put in it. Yeah, whatever you got. I mean, you know. Hunter, is this what you speak? See, they make, they make, I have to say this. Look at this joint. Look, when I was in Vietnam.

Oh, they got the hammy melons. Look at there. That's in Munro? We got to go. What's them things that look like bananas, but they ain't bananas? Yellow mango box. Yeah. What do you call them?

I don't know. Yellow mango. I would go to the Spanish one, but I don't know. I feel like I wouldn't fit in. There's one over there by Steve. Well, why you have got to fit in? That's a good point. Hey, just go to enjoy the moment.

Well, I just don't know. Why, you ain't going to go there and get a prepaid wireless card? No, that's what I'm saying. All they advertise is prepaid wireless cards. I probably know them. Oh, I go in. I've been in several of them getting tortillas. Like, those are the best tortillas.

The raw tortillas is. Well, anything to do with noodles? Yeah. That'd be homemade. So you're saying Asia got Italy wood. Oh, yeah, yeah. And noodle making. And noodle making.

I've never been to Asia. Hey, Mama's son had a soup, okay? Yeah. Noodle soup. If you had a cold or like John stopped up. Yeah. Oh, you eat that. You ain't got that no more.

Okay. Yeah. And it was same deal. You got, it was hot, okay, both ways. Hot when they served it and hot eating it. Yeah. And then hot. You'd need a towel where you wipe your brow.

I'll sweat off your brow. Hot on exit. I mean, oh yeah. All the way, all the way through. Chase it with ice cream. Gang. Yeah. I've never.

Hurry up ice cream. Yeah. Come on ice cream. Come on ice cream. Get there, buddy. I have never been inside the Azteca Super Mercado over there by the honeyhole, but I've always wanted to. Yeah.

And now I've Googled them and now I must go. Wow. What are you saying now? Not that you're one for frivolity. spending but they all of your there's authentic Mexican pinatas just for sale you know that's it's like anybody ages like Japanese anybody Vietnamese oh yeah they all use uh what is that ice cream what from Mexico is natural stuff they didn't melt they got you know they got natural stuff that you get off of a tree or a square bag it's most of them out you know all these

I can't think it's the ingredients. Yeah. Oh, man, I always said it didn't melt. Yeah, look, that's right over there.

Some people plant a garden. Right next to Westbrook and all that. The Asians, the Japanese, all them. They're big on earth. All these things are in the food. I ain't ever heard of it.

Hold up, but Azteca super Mercado has some phenomenal reviews on Google. I've got to go now. Or what? I've never been. There's one right down there. There's a grocery store.

It's a grocery store for authentic Mexican stuff. That's what sucks. Like, as an American, I got to apologize to the rest of the world because we're like, I'm fascinated by the Azteca Super Mercado. And then you go over to like Italy or something. It's like, well, we got our Kentucky bride chicken without an ice machine here. And I'm like, that's the best we got to send over. Yeah, I think they're the only ones that don't mind if they get compared to something else.

And McDonald's are everywhere. I'm like, that's what we get. We don't send toothpaste mustard packets. We send McDonald's. We send ice. And we're like, please try it. No, they won't. And that's the one thing the rest of the world uses to get in.

We send ice and salt. And they're like, can't do that. Like, uh-uh. I don't know. I don't know what's wrong with you Americans. What do you mean? Salt, pepper? No, the Mexicans are into salt.

this episode's going to be titled Four Country Bumpkins Talk About Other Places Yeah Cy Beth is frantically asking you to move your microphone back to your face Yeah

He's over here going Oh, okay I knew he's in trouble in Scotland When God went come walking in With a subway bag I said, oh oh yeah Subway My man had to go find a ham sandwich

Sandwich? There is one restaurant I ordered a hamburger Like to chip the tooth On the bread You could have Made dressing out of it If your food is

worse than Subway. Ugh. Subway is... You know, you're not a subway person? I don't believe in giving you eyes either. I think Subway, some subways are, it's a hoot to go to them and stuff. I tell you what, if we got a wobble home.

I put this on it, this on this out, yeah. It's a, it's an entertainment just watching them make the sandwich. Wait till you found out about Chipotle. Oh, or hobby peas. Hobby peas. Hold on. We took a Waffle House to Scotland, we'd change the culture. Amen.

We would. Or hobby peas. Say like that kale. It's hanging in every store on the wall. That's to keep the spirit. We got chicken wings. That's what we got as Americans. As a man who ate a family meal of wings up last night, we got that.

What is a family meal? Like 20 of them? 24. Wow, you ate all of them? And a large fry. Egg dog. some celery. You know, it seemed crazy. I had wing. I had wings top last night. Look, I ain't had no lunch. I'm hungry. You have wing stop too? Yeah. And we're always talking about food. I got a eight

piece. I didn't go with 24. I bought the family pack and thought there would be leftovers. There was not. I was smash. Get in where you fit it. I was tired. I was eating. I was eating wings watching catching up on severance. Wings is America's thing, right? Is that our thing? I don't know. Wait a way do we go on. Hey, John David. Why are boneless wings of cheaper than bone in wings. Because they're chicken nuggets. Yeah. And you got every...

They bought them from McDonald's and threw them in sauce. Yeah, you got every part from the router to the tutor in it. You can't do that on something with a bone in it. Yeah. That sounds like more work, though. No, it ain't more work. It's the scraps all combined together and then put in a patty and gone out there. All right, yeah, I guess that makes sense.

Chicken nuggets are the byproduct of the chicken. Yeah. Like, you don't take a perfectly good chicken and grind him up. You take whatever's left after you trim everything, grind it up, but in a paddy, call it chicken nuggets. Why did they start putting rotissory chickens in bags? Sorry, that's another thing. Why does the early bird get the worm, but good things come to those who wait? Oh, crap.

Boy, that's a toughie. Philosophy 101. Well, my mind's now blown. That's a toughie. Do you know? No, I'm wondering. He's just wondering it. He doesn't know, and I'm not going to sleep tonight.

Yeah, right there with driving on a parkway and parking on a driveway. Nah, that would make sense. Yeah. You know? But also. Why apartments when they're together? Yeah. I did have one email for you, Guy one.

What's that? Brian emails in from Hendersonville, Tennessee. Whoa. That's Brittany's hometown. Yeah, I drove through there. I'm against this joke. He's got the guy with joke of me another on-co. He's got the guy with joke of the day.

The goblin joke of the day. I'm going to give it a thumbs down before I even say it, Brian. I don't like this one. They don't like it. Why do ducks have tail feathers? Why do you like mud on their butt? They don't like mud on their butt. That's not the answer.

Don't like mud on their butt. That's why they got tail feathers. To cover their butt quacks. Beth thought it was funny. Brian, Beth's losing it right now. She's the only one. She can't even breathe. She's from the 51st state of Canada.

Oh, boy. Sorry, Trudeau. This is my favorite voicemail to date. Oh. Last time you said this was about you. So we're back on that. That's it. It's this one, they...

Just play the voice mail. I'm just going to play it. Yeah. Yeah. Spit it out. Hey, what's up? Duck call room. My name is Michael. I am from Plainview, Texas.

Uh, I got a little story that turns. into a dad joke. So one of my friends' daughter just got her permit, right? She's scared of driving. Hold on. How old is this guy? He sounds like he's 17.

I have no idea. His friend's daughter got a permit? I have. You know, maybe. Sorry. So, I went to the store and bought her a storm trooper helmet. And I told her, here,

put this on. and you won't hit anything. Anyway, guys, I love y'all. And Hunter, I hope you play this message because that's one for you, man. Oh, by the way, Hunter. It was a Star Wars job behind. Are you a Jedi or sick? Love y'all guys.

Catch you later. Where is this joke? I'm going to explain it because Hunter's, Hunter, Hunter just lost Hunter Cam and microphone for that. The joke, Stormtroopers, never hit anybody. they're always shooting in the movies and they've never... They've never killed him. They've never shot anyone.

They ain't never killed him. So the joke was he gave the girl a helmet because she's driving now that way she won't hit anybody. Really in Hunter's lane of humor. Yeah. I don't think that qualifies as a dad joke.

It went above my head. But that's a funny thing to do to someone though who's just starting to drive give them a stormtrooper helmet so they don't hit anything. Is it? Is it really? really funny?

That's one of six jokes. It sounds dangerous to wear a stormtrooper helmet. Those are hard to see out of. Yeah, they look like black across the eyes. There's no reason they don't. I mean, there's no wonder they don't hit anything. I think the joke was that key gate. Really?

Calm down, Hunter. What about a halo helmet? He just ordered toothpaste mustard. You act like buying a stormtrooper helmets out of the question. I don't know in any helmets. That's, that's, that's a Saints helmet. I used to have a Miami helmet. Hunter, are you about to say that John David's a bigger

than you. Yeah, probably. Yeah. Well, how come you're the only one

that laughed at the joke? I just saw it. He's the only one that got it. He explained it. I got the joke. I just,

it was just, it was, it's kind of like Brian's joke. Yeah. But to answer your question, why did the Germans

put the hot mustard in a tube of toothpaste? Yeah. That's why you could just say, you put it on on your finger? Why are you,

you're really big and just eating straight condiments today. I know. A little cocktail. That's good, though. I'm serious.

It is good. Si is a sauce guy. I'm a sauce guy. He's like the exact opposite of me. I'm not a condiment guy. That's because you're afraid of vinegar. I'm not afraid of it. I just think if you did a good job in the initial preparation, you shouldn't need that.

Finner. It's a good salad on a salad. Oh, sigh, I forgot to bring you some new socks. Dang. Well, hey, I'm more of a hundred mustard. Yeah, I bring them. Yeah, my friends over at little. They've got the same one on both sides.

My friends over at Little Debbie sent me a care package of some new peanut butter cream pot. I got nutty bar socks for here. Hey, little Debbie, you can send it here so we can. I need to take this con call. Hold on. I take it. I really do.

Well then, watch this. Make it live. Let's see it out of here, Johnny D. Yeah, make it live. Jonah 117. Who called it? Oh, that's hospital. Yeah, answer that.

Now the Lord provided a huge fish to swallow Jonah, and Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights. We don't know if it's a catfish or a whale, but it could have been. any of them. God, when answer your phone, we'll see you next time right here in Duckcar Room. There's a sock store in Pigeon Forge that I'm going to. Hey, we'll play me back back.