Duck Call Room - Justin Martin Came Face-to-Face With a Home Intruder
Episode Date: January 20, 2026Justin Martin recounts the tense moment he came face-to-face with a thief after a late-night break-in at his family’s home and the split-second decisions that followed. Uncle Si relieves the night h...e chased a peeping tom away from his sister’s window, and Godwin quietly models what it looks like to be a good friend. Plus, John-David reviews the Duck Call Room after listening to an episode for the very first time, and the boys weigh in on the biggest wildlife debate raging across the country as a proposed law change looms. Duck Call Room episode #519 is sponsored by: https://fastgrowingtrees.com/duck — Get 20% off your next purchase with code DUCK at checkout! https://trybeef.com/duck — Get 10% off your first TriTails box straight from their ranch to your door. https://www.mypillow.com/duck — Get the best deals on all MyPillow's products, including the classic MyPillow for just $17.98, with code DUCK at checkout! - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Did you know that I listened to this podcast the other night?
I don't, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I didn't, I listen to the one. I listened to the one with outside just see if I was like, I mean, I thought I was hilarious.
I'm just, oh, Hunter, don't, I was, I was, uh, I did not, let it roll, Hunter, that's great.
No, I wasn't terrible.
I was like, I get why people may listen to this.
But I tried it out podcasts for the first time of my life.
Well, the good news is we did one yesterday or day before.
I don't know, that is 98% Silas.
I sat here like this.
Side, you get excited?
I just got up and said, piss on this.
I ain't making no more coffee like that.
He said, I've had it with this.
If Goblin makes his coffee, I'll say, welcome to the duck call room, then I'm out of here.
Because there ain't no sense and even trying, buddy.
Oh, this was yesterday with y'all's guests.
Uh-huh.
Okay.
But he never, I mean, I ain't ever, I ain't seen that man have that much energy.
I said, golly.
You fired up?
Oh, yeah.
It's just.
Sitting here is actually harder when you have nothing to say.
It was, it got stupid.
I feel like you probably had plenty to say.
I didn't have nothing to say.
You were just that tired.
I was tired.
I still am tired.
We got the bottomless pond going and then that's that.
That's too day.
Bottomless pawn.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You ever thought about it?
A pond with no bottom.
How deep would the cropy be in that?
Right.
I'd be 12 foot deep.
Right about the thermocline.
Bottomless pond.
Oh, man.
But Martin, Martin, can we talk about it?
Yeah, I don't care.
I have many questions for you.
About what?
About what in the world happened.
You put it up on Instagram.
I did.
And that's when I decided not to add.
Being Martin probably talk every day, Sire.
And he told me,
something and I had so many more questions than I was like, well, I guess I'll save it for the world.
Martin got broke into, sir.
Oh, yeah.
Wait, your house?
No, not my house, but my grandparents' house that we still own and have our garden there.
And like, I have all my decoys there in the shop and, you know, just another place to store stuff.
I got, you know, the other night, you know, we were out at Pinocke with our guest till, what, 10 o'clock or so?
or nine o'clock.
Anyway, I got home at 10 o'clock from being out there.
And I'm getting undressed to go to bed because it was a long day.
That day started at 4 a.m.
Yeah.
And I never got a break.
It's not on Instagram.
And you walked about 1.6 miles.
I walk 1.6 miles duck hunting.
Picking up cripples.
Picking up ducks.
Like I said about 1.6.
No.
No, I just said, I just thought, I said, how far you think I walked this morning?
He said, I don't know.
He said, you walked a lot.
I said, one point six miles.
I said, please, I don't know I have two miles.
Yeah.
And he said, one point six.
One point six miles.
I said, well, you got your cardiac.
10,000 this morning.
Yeah, cardiac.
Cardiac's done, boys.
So anyway, I get home, get undressed and my phone vibrates, and it's my spy point
app.
And, I mean, I've got no less than 30 trail cameras out right now.
So I don't really think nothing of it, right?
And I'm like, all right, whatever, spy point, great.
if it's ducks, cool, deer, whatever, I don't care.
But something made me check that stupid thing.
And I looked over and there's a guy,
because I got them on my grandparents' house because we're not there.
And there's a guy standing there.
A hooded figure, if you will.
Yeah, a hooded figure.
And I'm like, man.
And so I'm just sitting there thinking,
I took like a minute, sit there and think,
no, man, they ain't going to do nothing.
And I get another picture and it's him still there.
And I say, gosh, damn.
it okay.
I'm getting dressed.
I'm getting dressed.
And so I got back dressed and I got in my truck and then I called the
Washedaw Parish Sheriff's Office and I told him.
So look, I got this guy over here.
He's trespassing.
I'm on my way there.
I just want y'all to know this, right?
Like in case something, and they were like, I said, y'all don't have to come.
I'm sure he's going to be gone by the time I get there.
No big deal.
And they were like, no, we'll send a unit out there or whatever.
And so they said, but let's stay on the phone if you're almost there.
And I was like, okay, no problem.
So I get there and I'm still on the phone with the sheriff's department.
And I pull in and I say, oh, crap.
And the lady on the phone dispatcher is like, what is it?
I said, he's still here.
There's somebody in the house.
Yeah, he's still here.
I heard her voice pick up in excitement as she's radioing this to the people,
the fine folks in Washington, the fine folks watched off Air Sheriff's Department.
And she heard me load my shotgun.
And she said, sir, what do you do it?
I said, I'm blown to good.
I said, protecting myself.
I'm old to good.
And she said, yeah, that's just fine.
That's totally legal.
That's yaw's property or whatever.
And so she's staying on the phone.
Was it an automatic shotgun or a pump shotgun?
It was a Benelli Super Black Eagle 328 gauge.
Because nothing would be scarier if I was in somebody else's house.
I will tell you, I will tell you, this man knows how to really use that gun.
because we go we go hunt together and that you know we we believe 28 gauge is one of our favorites
yeah and so oh boy I guess well there were two of them on the second picture of the camera
so I guess somebody was in the bushes watching you know like a lookout or something and probably
told him oh crap yeah yeah you got troubles you got company yeah you got trouble
this ain't good headlights have turned into the driveway
And so I'm standing there and I hear the rustling.
Of course, the lady's still on phone.
I got a Bluetooth on my truck.
But I got the door open with that shotgun pointed at that door.
Because I'm like, if this gets, but I'm smart enough to keep the door in between me and him.
Oh, yeah.
I'm not a cop.
I ain't got no vest.
I don't know if this guy's got a gun.
I don't know.
I'm just doing what I can.
You don't know if he's on drugs?
Yeah, I'm just protecting myself in my property.
And he gets to the door.
and I just looked at him
but I had that shotgun on his forehead
and I said buddy
make the right decision
and he took off running the other way
I said you made the right decision
yeah don't get stupid
yeah oh yeah I mean he was probably
his heart was probably beaten out of his ears
because I imagine 28 gauge is a small shotgun
but when it is pointed at you with ill intentions
I bet it looks big
oh no no no I will give you
I will give you a first-hand experience about that.
Yeah.
Cops pull me over.
Okay, I'm used to Louisiana cops.
They tell you to get out of the car and come back to them.
Yeah.
Well, this was in Texas.
So I got out of the car and they pulled them 38th on me behind the door.
Yeah.
Hey, that looked like a 105.
Yeah.
That thing looked that big around and I went, whoa!
Yeah.
Hey, Sa, let's just say you were somewhere you weren't supposed to.
to be in the dead of night and you saw this figure looking at you because you're not small
either marlin i'd have been scared of you but then when i saw no no that barrel that would remind me
when we went to new mexico and was hunting on the real grand and we stayed in a motel room
oh yeah hey look he all is sitting up in his long johns with a 12-gauge of browning loaded and a guy's
backing in his room.
And when he turns around and sees Phil,
he said, wrong room.
And Phil said, you think?
I left him with the parting words of next time you get to taste tungsten.
So hopefully there is no next time.
And he doesn't have to worry about what three inch number six is taste like.
No, no, see, that's what I just, you know.
You know, and the cops got there and they commended me for not shooting him running away.
I said, man, I'm not, look.
You didn't want to hurt nobody.
I didn't want to do it.
I didn't want him to be there.
I didn't want him to be in there.
I wanted to tell y'all, it's all good.
He was just snooping around.
That's what I hoped had happened.
He got inside the house.
Yeah, and I wanted a peaceful resolution.
And him running away is peaceful.
Like, that's fine.
I bet he doesn't come back.
No, no.
I said that too, and those cops said,
you would shockingly be surprised.
Well, no, no.
If you were talking about that fire or something at him.
Yeah.
Yo, my sister runs in and says, hey, somebody's peeping in my window.
So I'm sitting there and was cleaning my pistol.
Yeah.
So, hey, I threw nine hollow points in that nine shot, what's the model.
And I went looking for him and, hey, if I'd have seen him, I would have shot the sucker.
I mean, I'm totally prepared to protect my mind.
but yeah and you always wonder like in that situation could you do it like i mean i've always wondered
and i've never been put in that situation thank god well but let me tell you what i learned about
myself when he come out that door my finger got heavy i can do it if i have to if it got
my finger got heavy on that trigger well and i mean it's jay here's the thing that you're up
against an unknown yeah i mean i i just okay you know
I'm glad he didn't raise his hand.
The thing about it, it would guess me would be okay.
Is this guy high on meth?
Okay, because, hey, if he makes the wrong move with me,
he's just to die.
Yeah, that's going to be a problem.
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That's scary, man.
Yeah, it sucked.
I mean, I'm serious.
How bad is your heartbeat?
172.
I had to know.
I love the exact sweet now.
I had to know.
No, I had to know.
I went back while the cops were doing all their stuff, reports and fingerprints and all that stuff.
And the cop come over, he said, what are you doing?
I said, I'm checking to see what my heart rate got up to.
He said, I bet it was north of 160.
And I looked and I said, 172.
He said, yeah, that's about right when you have to make that decision.
No, no.
I mean, because, you know, they have to make that decision more than they should ever have to, right?
And, I mean, he was just very matter of fact.
He said, yeah, that's right.
Well, see, I've had a lot of them.
But he told me, he said, he said, that's a good thing.
He said, because you're not used to it.
He said, the ones you got to worry about are the ones whose heart rate goes to like 105.
He said, those people, stone cold killers.
That's probably like-
Because it doesn't even raise their heart rate.
But that's probably like you with a duck.
Yeah.
But if we took Hunter out there, his heart would be going.
You know what's crazy, though?
So I've been checking it to see if I still get excited with a duck.
And every time I shoot, it still gets up to like 110.
It still excites me.
That's good.
To raise up and kill, like, the hunting ducks.
It's actually kind of cool.
I love how much you know about your heart rate.
There's a lot of downtime in duck hunting.
So now I've got so much data at my fingertips.
Well, no, no.
You know I'm a nerd.
So, like, I sit there.
I'm just scrubbing data all morning.
No, no, because this is like all military people, I would figure,
have always wondered if it hadn't gone into combat,
You know, you always question yourself about, okay, would I be man enough to take care of my buddies?
Yeah.
Okay.
What I learned is I got you back, buddy.
Well, no, no.
I'm with you, fellas.
You know, a few times that it was got Harry and on with me.
Okay, hey, if they had messed up, now, hey, that that M14 would have been automatic.
Yeah.
And, hey, I was a 30 rounds would have went down range.
But I do value human life.
I don't want to, I am so glad that he did and that I don't have to live with whatever that visual would have been.
No, no.
Like, I just, I am so thankful that the dumbest thing he did was knock that window out and went inside that house.
And I'm sure he was shocked at my response to the time he got in there to the time I got there.
I look at that, because I didn't, you know, when was that, that thing and Phil had that guy.
back in his room you know and like you're you're back in a room and turn around and see my brother
buried his brother and long john with a 12-gauge shotgun loaded laying across he lap he didn't need
the gun to scare that person yeah he's Phil Robertson yeah yeah no I wonder if I'm wondering how
this guy's telling this story I don't I reckon he's not y'all like I leave what
But I did not.
Some people brag.
Yeah.
It's crazy, Martin.
But there ain't nothing in there.
There's nothing in there.
Like, there's nothing in there.
You know who would find value in there?
Jacob Mayo.
Because there's like all their old clothes.
It's spinach.
Yeah, all their old clothes.
You're not out.
There's nothing.
There's nothing of any value in there.
Which I told the cops that.
There's anything missing?
I said, no, he didn't have nothing in his hands.
I said, and he wasn't in there very long.
and because they were like well how could you get here i was like as fast as you can like i can be
there i now know the shortest amount of time i can get from my house to their house like
and i wasn't in a hurry but like it was you know it was 10 o'clock at night so like no red lights
weren't an issue traffic wouldn't no see that's like me that would present a problem with me
since i i didn't get to know my grandfathers yeah but i knew my grandmother just don't go in there
and disrespect
their
and hey,
you're going
in my grandmother's
house.
Yeah.
I will shoot you.
It ain't no doubt
about that.
I will shoot you.
Yeah.
You're in my
someone's house
that loved me
and raised me.
Well,
that was my whole childhood.
Right?
I mean,
that was,
that was kind of where I...
Your own
really dangerous ground with me.
They were my,
they were my daycare.
Oh, no.
Yeah.
Because they were
freshly retired.
I was
baby of the family.
So like, they were my daycare.
So that, you know, all of my poor fishing memories reside there.
Like, all those things.
So it's like, there's too much, there's too much emotional of feelings involved with,
with those people.
And that sucker better be glad my granddaddy ain't still alive because he wasn't
ever had the opportunity.
Well, no, no.
Like, I'm just telling you right now, no.
no opportunity.
Well, see, the people don't realize that
about your grandfathers and grandmothers.
Yeah.
They didn't play.
They didn't play that thievery day.
No, no, yeah.
Theft was not tolerated.
Oh, hey, my mama, my mama,
there was two things you didn't do with mama.
Lie to her, okay, or steal something.
Yeah.
You was in a murder class.
If you done either one of them.
Yeah.
The murder class.
This was a woman that hitchhiked from Louisiana to L.A.
to be with her husband when he joined the Navy to go to war.
Whoa, time out.
Rewind that.
Your mom hitchhiked from Lott from Shreveport to Los Angeles?
Yeah.
And look, all she would do is anybody in uniform,
she would put her arm under his arm and said,
Hey, till we get off of this bus, I'm your wife.
And she made it all the way to Los Angeles.
Hey, went all the way to Los Angeles and just,
hey, showed up on the naval base, okay?
You know, and they said, well, who are you?
You know, hey, I'm Merritt Robertson.
My husband is here and I've come to be with him
before he goes off the war.
That's wow.
You know my favorite thing that happened that night, though?
Me and the cops, other than ones doing the scene,
all sat there and completely.
pair trail cam pictures.
All right.
We sat out there.
Watched all parish, baby.
We sat out there in a driveway.
And what's funny is apparently one of them listens because he said, well, I'm going,
can't wait to get this podcast.
I said,
no,
I said,
I said,
you listen and you live in our time.
They stole something for the honey hole.
I got a picture of him.
Here it is, boys.
Yeah.
No, run him down.
You would actually be surprised how many people from Washington.
Tall Parish listen to this.
Well, and he told me, he said, man, because he works nights all the time.
He said, you'd be amazed at how long these nights are.
He said, some of them are very short.
He said, but most of them are very long.
He said, so you got to find something to do to keep you entertain.
Oh, no, I'm telling you, have no idea what the cops see at night around Monroe and West Monroe.
It's a wild.
It's crazy.
I'm going to assume it's like that everywhere, though.
Oh, it is.
You know what it is.
There's wild people all over.
I don't know.
So if the five folks of Washington
of the five sheriff's department listen,
I'm sure there are some of y'all out there
from other police departments that listen.
Y'all mind dropping us some of them crazy stories?
Hello at duckcallroom.com.
Hello at duckcallroom.com.
Or call us, man.
Oh, the guy that works for me
has got a great one about a naked person
in front of the Sonic.
Well, I've had to tackle them.
The law officers have told me when I've been talking to.
they said, hey, because of you're raised,
if you're afraid for your life, he said, go ahead and kill it.
Yeah, we discussed the proper,
we discussed the proper etiquette of that the other night, too.
I didn't know there was an etiquette.
Mm-hmm.
An etiquette.
I know it.
Yeah.
Kind of like fishing etiquette.
Yeah, no, not really.
It's kind of like the exact opposite almost.
Is it, is it like etiquette of like how duck hunters treat each other on Facebook?
Yeah, kind of.
Yeah, they're all real nice right now.
Just firing shots everywhere.
Nothing bad going on in that world either.
Why is everybody...
Corn grower.
Yeah.
I just don't understand why everybody so...
No, Martin's in the news, y'all.
Martin's in the news.
I don't understand why everybody's so mad at each other.
Like, that's what I don't understand.
I don't get it.
And I don't get that we live in a society now
where if you have a different opinion, you're the devil.
What does that matter?
Like, aren't a...
aren't differences in opinions good things?
Like, I thought that's how we get to.
Only if you're right.
I thought that's how we got to resolutions.
It's like you hear,
you hear two people side of the story where again,
which is what I am,
I'm very much down the middle on this issue.
My side's always right.
Like, and I think that's what makes them mad
is because I am down the middle.
Like I'm very bipartisan on this whole horn debate.
Yeah, but on that, why would they get mad?
But most of them.
Hey, I'm more listed to both sides.
of the story.
Yeah.
I don't.
Or I make my judgment on which one of you needs to apologize to the other one.
Yeah.
I was fired up.
I am too.
Who can't be fired up about beef, man?
Sometimes like you, you know, you just take a bite or something.
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This is the one right here.
This is it.
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For those that don't know, there's a big
controversy in the duck hunting world.
What's that?
What's that?
That's how British people say controversy.
Controversy?
Controversy.
Major controversy.
How do you spell that?
Same way.
That's like controversy.
But they just say it fine.
Controversy.
But there's, they're getting laws or something.
I don't really understand.
Flooded corn.
It's all about corn in Missouri is what it feels like.
I did a short dive because Martin posted about it and it went wild.
And I was like, well, I might as well educate myself.
There's drama.
And I should be a shame from being from Louisiana and saying that.
Just so we're all clear.
Well, that's like people that don't.
Well, I use fart facing sonar.
So there.
It is.
It is the forward.
forward-facing sonar of duck-up.
And that's what I said in one of the comments.
I was like,
this is the forward-facing sonar of duck-up.
The people that have it,
love it.
The people that don't hate it.
And I'm like,
yeah,
that's right.
Daddy told me he's cheating.
That's like pouring.
Don't talk with your mouth full pass a ketchup.
Porn corn out and for,
to lure deer and for deer hunting.
Or chum.
He said,
don't know.
Yeah.
You know.
look it's a management two
chum the deer
okay that's all it is
it's a management two
to manage your deer herd
yeah okay
because hey I take the time
if they're going up to a corn pile
or a chum pile
they sit there and eat it and I can say
well okay now that's
an eight point
let's see how old is he's three
well nope I don't want to shoot him
I want to let him give another two years
breeding the dough.
I just want to say how long the backstraps is,
the one with the longest backstrap.
Yeah.
That's the ones I'm on she.
But hey,
I just don't.
I like eating them.
It's a wild world on the interwebs right now.
That's why there's...
Because apparently in the making of it, I got a new job.
Apparently, I'm a full-time guide at Habitat Flats in Summner, Missouri now.
You are?
Unequivocally not true.
Dang, I got excited.
I got excited.
I know.
I get a disc.
That's what I'm saying.
Like, I've bought into it and now I'm a guide.
And I'm like, how much money do y'all think I got, bro?
Oh, we go on TV.
I can't buy into that joint.
Like, I'd love to.
I'd love to have had the success to buy into that place
because they would have to kick me out.
Like, I would definitely go there and hunt.
It's good.
They'd manage them, ducks, wouldn't we?
Yeah, I'd help.
But, yeah, it's just the internet is a wild place, man.
Well, hey, look, if it wasn't for hummers,
we wouldn't have the wildlife we've got.
Yeah, and at this rate, and at this right.
But they're only ones that love it enough to fund it, to spend money on it?
To fund it.
Yeah, to fund it, okay, to buy land.
But, Cy, you're treading down the road where people from Louisiana about to be mad at you.
Don't use no comments on.
Hey, look, they just has to get mad.
They just has to get mad.
Better stop.
They don't like that.
Well, hey, they just got to get mad.
Yeah.
All right, just get here.
Look, I served in the military for 24 and a half years.
Hey, took a nap every day.
take my freedom seriously.
There you go.
Amen.
So, hey, I'm going to say what I want to say, because, hey, I got that freedom.
So I got a question for you.
Yeah.
You grew up doing this duck hunting.
When was the best duck hunting of your life that you remember?
70.
I don't remember that.
Yeah, it would be.
The 70?
The 70s.
Because back then, okay, you know, people don't realize what a big deal.
when the migration starts.
Yeah.
And would you say from the 70s, right, the 70s?
Yep.
From the 70s until now, every year that migration has gotten a little less.
It's got, yeah.
So starting in 1927.
72, okay, they used to, okay, somebody would come sliding sideways in your yard
and jump out of a pickup or a car and scream out,
The flight is on.
The 70s, y'all.
Okay.
Not 1990.
It wasn't a flight day.
No, no.
Hey, this was be a flight month and a half or two.
Yeah.
Every day.
You could not go out at night or during the daytime and not look up.
And hear and see geese coming over.
My Loduck's coming over.
Okay.
It was part of life.
I remember them day.
Oh, no.
It was part of life.
There you go.
Okay.
The most ducks I've ever seen, you know,
and I'm talking about when,
even in Moss Lake's hey days,
the most ducks I've seen was I saw them on Red River in Dixie, Louisiana.
Being a buddy of mine from high school,
he went to another school,
but we was a good friend.
We hunted together.
We went to Red River.
It started at daylight,
and we left.
We left after hunt to 2 o'clock, and we killed one mile at end.
And we've seen, I bet you, five million.
Five million dollars.
Five million dollars.
Because, hey, from daylight, as far as you could see, from east to west,
was nothing but just ducked, bunches of ducks after bunches of ducks,
and they was all going toward the marshes down in South Louisiana.
Yeah.
Man.
And I mean, there was anywhere from like 500 to 5,000 in a bunch.
It'd be a tornado.
You'd be in the rice field.
There'd be a tornado over here and a tornado over here and a tornado over.
No, no, Maas.
Hey, B-break was that way.
We'd be up there the last couple of days before season before it opened.
Russian blinds.
And there'd be the flight would be on.
And, hey, it'd be bunch after bunch, just a black tornado going around that big.
cypress tree that we put a blind in the top of you know i'm talking about from hey the daylight in the
morning when we started the dark flam dark at night did y'all have a lot of ag back then a lot of what
agriculture oh yeah yeah a bunch of what were y'all growing uh everything cotton everything uh corn
soybeans uh what is uh what is the sugar sugar what it's sweet sweet uh sweet uh uh
seed plant.
Grows about six foot high and big old heads on it.
And it's actually sweet.
Like Milo?
Yeah.
Or sorghum.
Chalk,
sorghum.
Grain sorghum.
Yeah.
Grain sorghum.
Yeah.
That was everywhere.
Yeah.
Any cotton?
Yep.
A lot of cotton.
All of cotton.
Everything that was plantable.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like Dix, Louisiana,
all over all.
It had to the Texas everywhere.
There was no one.
but agriculture.
Agriculture.
Not concrete.
Yeah.
Right?
Yeah.
They're not not unsuitable habitat for ducks.
Yeah.
Interesting.
Red River had.
Making sense again.
I'm serious.
Red River.
Stop it.
Interesting.
Red River was a major flyaway back then.
It ain't.
None of the people mad at you listen to us.
Mississippi River was.
No, what they're going to do is come in here and cherry pick the parts of size where the
migration was on.
They're going to completely disregard.
guard that he said in the 70s it got worse. It started getting worse every year from there.
Well, no, no, because here's the deal. I'd say, as humans, we suck at stewarding land.
Oh, yeah. No, no, we're terrible. We put concrete there. We drain it. We ditch it. We mow it. We herbicide it. We herbicide, it. All in the
nature of better yields and more money. And we don't give two crap in general about what lives there.
Or uses it. And now we're paying the money.
price for that way of thinking.
Here's what was happening in the 70s
with the farmers.
They didn't cut no
fence lines, trimming.
Hey, they left
like 12 rows of corn
on the fields. Oh,
don't want to hear that.
Okay. They left it for the game.
Oh.
The deer, for the quail, for the doves.
For the ducks, if it got water on?
The ducks if it got water on.
That of mighty, it was going on in a 70.
The farming practices now are so more advanced.
My only point is that the way we have destroyed planet Earth
to point at one thing that actually feeds ducks is to me ludicrous.
And I'm fine with changing it.
I am.
But you got to fix the problems down here before you change that.
Like, if you don't fix it, we're not doing anything.
You're just putting a piece of bubble gum where a rivet's missing in an aluminum boat.
you ain't going to get very far.
Like, you're still going to get your feet wet.
So, like, that's my only deal.
Like, I just, but boy.
I get one of them green sticks.
Yeah.
To have a, to have a common sense opinion and be middle of the road on all this and
willing to sit down, I volunteered to sit down with both sides and be like a mediator.
Nope, you got to choose a stance.
I'm like, why?
Why?
Because I think the answer to most everything is always somewhere in the middle.
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Gobin, are you left-handed?
Nope.
I need a left-handed fisherman.
Why?
A left-handed fisherman.
Why are you saying?
Well, because a customer brought me about 25 croppy the other night.
He got in a bind and then had to go somewhere and wasn't going to be able to be home to clean him.
He called me.
He said, is there anybody up there that would just take these fish off my hands?
And I said, oh, yes, there is, sir.
I got you, baby.
And so me and the boys, I got home and I was like.
Oh, yeah, now I know.
You asked me this other day.
I got home and I said, boys, let's go.
We're going over to where my dad cleans his fish.
We're about to have fish cleaning lessons.
I forgot both of my children are left-handed.
What different does it, Mike?
Everything's backwards.
No.
Even Big Dave couldn't figure it out.
We kind of figured it out.
Here's Carter trying to clean a fish.
I mean, we had it going.
But it was...
But the knife still in his right hand, huh?
Well, that was Big Dave's hand.
He had two hands on it.
Oh, yeah.
Big Dave said, we ain't going to lose a finger over us.
Yeah, but it was difficult to try and teach.
I'm struggling mightily in my life with trying to teach left-handed kids how to do stuff.
I don't say what the difference is.
I can probably do it.
You could do it with a knife in your left hand?
I couldn't do it.
I'm just, I'm sitting here imagining.
I can shoot left-hand.
I can't throw a ball left-handed.
No.
I can't right.
I mean, I can throw it, but it ain't going to break a pain of glass.
No speed, no control.
Yeah.
But it's the same thing.
You just did it where you left hand.
We were trying.
It was kind of a mess.
But we did get a good gut bucket out of it.
Them boys were fired.
Oh, yeah.
I will say it's one of my prouder moments because they both want to learn how to clean fish
more than they want to learn how to catch fish.
That's what that electric filet now, right?
Oh, yeah, you could do it.
Okay.
Well, hey, look, Al Bowling.
It's backwards.
Hey, how bow.
and that Phil Roberts
a little bit of a little bit of a little bit.
He could clean fish.
You hold him where you right hand.
Yeah, the biggest thing is it would be,
I'm just thinking like when you lay the fish down.
It would be odd.
You got to have the fish point in the other way.
Yeah, we try.
And I mean, I could whittle on it.
It would by no means be pretty.
But I could.
Now that I think about it,
I could whittle.
Oh, I could do it.
Actually, the hard part would be,
getting the skin off.
Yeah.
Like I think the first fillet would be the easy part.
No, I'm just saying the,
the getting the skin off takes a little finesse,
like to not just cut through the skin and leave it on there.
But going down the backbone is easy.
I mean, that's just me,
your knife does all the work on that one.
You're just kind of steered.
You just lay it on the back of the tail.
Yeah.
Oh, dude, my next one's left in.
That's what I wanted to hear.
What's that?
Gobwin.
Gobbins going lefty next time.
And then I need you to report back.
to me and Big Dave.
I got a guide trip tomorrow.
Hey, you won't be able to do it good.
I'll put it to that way.
I bet you after about five I can.
No.
God would do me a solid other day and called me and said,
or he sent me a picture of him posing with a crappy.
He said, you want 12 of these?
I said, absolutely.
Yes, please.
I showed up.
He's like, I'm headed your way.
I said, no, buddy, I'm coming to your house.
Any man nice enough to do that for me, I will come pick up.
Then he offered to clean them for me.
And I said, no.
I know.
They tried to do it left-handed with the 11-olds.
I'm telling you.
Oh, yeah.
I said, Godwin, if you go through the trouble of catching them and bringing them to right here, I can take it from there.
The funnest thing, the funnest I ever watch.
Oh, Biggins.
Hell bowling.
Bet Phil that he can clean 20 bars faster with an electric knife than Phil's just got a sharp bus to die.
No.
I don't believe that.
No.
Phil's got a little.
No, he tried it.
He tried it.
Yeah, no,
like.
Phil by five.
Oh, no.
That's my good.
Oh, hey, look.
No, half it.
Ten?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Right.
He's,
like,
they used to have 20 bass weighing about,
like a pound,
pound height.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Phil,
done finished his and bowling at 10 left.
Yeah.
And he said,
Bowling.
Oh,
that,
that,
that,
that, that,
that,
that, that,
that,
that,
that,
he said,
you gotta wait on the knife,
,
electricity you do it.
He said, I got a sharp bushen knife here that's razor sharp.
He said, it's just fish, shish, and fish.
Phil said, you got to watch a lot.
Tough enough to do it fast.
I tried it.
I got a good knife.
I bought me a good knife.
I forget what brand it is, but I mean, I can't get it sharp enough to.
Here's the thing you do.
If you're wrong with somebody like for killing ducks and you'll watch a pick duck,
okay, or watch people that bass fish.
if they're real fast at either one of them,
that means they've killed a lot of ducks.
Yeah.
I'm pretty fast.
And they've called a lot of fish.
Oh, yeah.
I'm pretty fast cleaning fish, but it'd be faster without electric now.
Right.
I'm too.
I'm pretty slow at it.
Well, them salt water boys make quick work out of them.
Hey, Bollon had to wait on that electricity to cut that fish.
Wait.
We're waiting on electric.
Electricity is the wildest in it.
Lipp it over swish.
You know, when you don't have to wait on electricity,
when you stick a fork in that socket.
On Johnny D.
Tweezers.
You didn't have to wait, did you?
Let me.
Pretty instant, wouldn't it?
Lit me up.
I guess I don't have that.
Iron up.
Stone, I guess.
What, Sharpton and I?
That was a skill I never acquired.
My dad had one.
I mean, I can get them sharp, but not like they need to be.
Yeah.
My dad had one of them little kits where you put
thing up there on a vice and you go through like four different stones and I he didn't teach me
that he didn't well there's a knock to that yeah but then there's this company called
havalon it come out that you can just pop on off when it gets done you put a new one on it they make
a filet they do they shall do with a with a blade about it don't break when it hit bone that that was
another thing feels good at i've used it a little bit he had that it had three sides of
A woodrock and oil.
Yeah, I remember that.
I wonder if they're still down there on that cook shed.
Well, it's, I wouldn't know, no, it's set the house down there somewhere.
I'm sure it is.
Yeah.
Yeah, but they all different grits.
Yeah.
Hey, he'd have a thing.
Look, he'd have anything.
I'm telling you, he'd pull it an arm back a couple times.
It'd be like he had a razor.
Yeah.
He'd slide it off and it wouldn't be a hair there.
Yeah, that's the way my dad was too.
That's how he checked.
I thought when I seen Jay's clean them first time, I was down there,
them croppy with a butcher knife, I'm thinking,
he ain't cleaning them with that.
Whoa.
Yeah.
I guess the weight of it helps, too, if it's got a little weight to it to go through the home.
Hey, look, we.
Oh, them boys just quit.
We ate so much fish down there.
But, I mean,
That was their job.
I mean, crap.
Yeah.
That's your job.
You better get,
you'll get good at it.
You don't want to sit there alone.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like me,
I actually,
I don't mind,
especially now with the boys,
taking my time cleaning them
because, like,
it's just a science class.
The whole thing.
Daddy,
what's that?
What's that?
What's that?
What's that?
Carter's all fired up
because he was asking all the organs.
And then he said,
Hey.
That's the fish's tallywaker.
Is that the eggs?
Carter goes,
can we eat that?
Like caviar?
or my dad goes, well, my papal apparently used to fry fish eggs.
I've heard of it.
That was the best.
Have you eaten?
Have you eaten?
Did you eat it?
Did you eat?
Pick duck, wood ducks, and then gutted them.
Oh.
Yeah.
In the classroom.
Oh, uh, Washington.
Yeah.
We can relive that.
That was hilarious.
Yeah, I've heard that like croppy eggs battered and fried are fantastic.
Well, Carter's going to try it.
None of the rest of us are.
On our next batch, we all need to do it.
I will throw up.
Oh, you won't?
Just the thought of it.
No, I blindfold you.
And you won't know which one I put in the hand.
Eggwash.
Yeah, I will?
Just like you do the flour.
Hey, I'm just saying, I ain't caught a lot of fish in my life.
I ain't cleaned a lot of fish in my life.
But I've eaten my, I'll be able to tell.
As soon as you put a fish in my hand, I know what it is.
Well, it may firm up.
You never know.
It ain't going to keep that jelly like that.
What do they call them eggs when you...
Caviar.
Yeah, Carter thinks he's having caviar.
Them people put it on a cracker and ate it wrong.
Oh, no, look, I used to watch Phil when he would kiss them Opelousus catfish in him nets.
Uh-huh.
When they was full of egg, y'all, and hey, it's just a gigantic butt size of this.
That Yetty cut?
And about, look, about that long.
Oh, yeah, fish egg?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, and them two big rolls of them.
Yeah.
You know?
And they used to say, hey, why don't you all eat that caviar?
Yeah.
And I went, p.
All right, look, springtime is here.
It's warming up.
You know what that means.
That means more outside cooking.
And y'all know we love to eat beef around here.
And that's what because of our friends over at Triedales beef makes such a good product, baby.
Ain't it good?
It's so good.
It's our friend, Cy Robertson, would say, buy on the grill!
Look, before we got Triedales,
ready for a cookout man somebody had to run the grocery store do all the things grab whatever was
left in case you were late in the day and you never really know where that beef comes from but with try
tails beef we skip the grocery store and do it a different way try tales comes from a family ranch out in
texas they're a fifth generation american ranch so they've been at it for a while now look the beef
comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way their
steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door.
We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill.
Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need.
Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living,
you can taste the difference.
The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic.
So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Tritale's beef.
I know in size case, Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat.
She isn't a big meat, folks.
Yeah.
Just go to Try Beef.
dot com slash that's try beef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak one of them's
toxic is it gar like if you eat gar eggs you can die or something i don't know it could be croppy so now i ain't
trying it no no it ain't i know it's not he said no oh no no that'd be like a big sturgeon
think of the eggs on them big rustles well sturgeon that's why they're in trouble right that's one of the
they use for cats yeah yeah think about like an elephant that's what they used
Just think about the shoes that frogs were.
What?
Open toad.
Well, no, no, that's like, hey, that's like frog legs.
I mean, not a frog egg.
Ugh.
I'm only eating the chicken eggs.
They just lay out there.
Look, I'm talking about, it's a ball of them about the size of that, that, uh, uh, mongo
drunk.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I ain't doing that.
I'm only eating.
Weird looking.
Weird looking.
I see them, yeah.
I knew.
I thought it was.
Gar eggs to kill you?
Mm-hmm.
Well, not kill you, but make you really sick.
You'll want to die.
The toxins are not destroyed by cooking and be a very extreme case of food poison.
No, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea.
That happened to me just eating regular eggs.
Oh, you don't eat gar eggs.
Gar eggs are toxic.
No, don't eat gar.
Don't eat them, no.
Hey, I wouldn't eat a gar.
I did.
Threw up anyway.
Oh, no.
Wasn't even the toxic bar.
I liked it threw up when you was eating, and them boys was eating it.
I ate it.
Oh.
Yeah, you liked it.
Oh, the garball.
Oh, God.
The odor of that was rough.
It was rough.
I smelled that.
I watched that kid eat and then he went out and threw up.
Very salty.
The kids still like them.
They closed on it.
Yeah, they had a little much salt on it.
A little bit of salt.
Martin, what's looking up?
It was tough.
I do have the, I do have a good news, though, Martin.
I'm going to fix all the problems Louisiana has.
Go ahead.
What are you going to do?
I've got the solution.
Oh, you're going to fix all the problem?
Louisiana's gun? Yeah, it's going to take me about 40 years.
I'll fix it. What are you going to do with the humidity?
Right now, we got Carter at the capital. He's at the capital. Look at this picture, Martin.
He's at the capital, baby. My boy is confused on whether he's in heaven or Baton Rouge,
and I hope he realizes they're very different. He had to go to a doctor's appointment today,
and Allison surprised him, went by the state capital. Oh, yeah. She goes, I don't, I don't know.
That's his stepping stone to D.C. baby.
She said, I don't know that we'll ever be home.
He's gone on a full tour.
He's got the tour guide wrapped up.
I used to do that in elementary school.
Did you ever do that?
I've never been.
Oh, yeah, I did it.
Oh, no, I want to.
Did you get you some competitor money up there in the top?
I did.
I did, but you don't remember.
You want to know my highlight, but I remember.
When Uncle Sam says, I got you, I went through D.C.
Okay.
No, this is Louisiana now.
Okay.
My one...
Huey P-Law?
No.
I mean, yeah, Kingfish.
Yeah, I remember him.
Well, the bullet hole's still there.
Yeah.
But once you got done with it, they gave you the little cup of swirled ice cream with a little wooden spoon.
And as a former husky young man, that I remember sitting there on those steps eating that freaking ice cream.
That's that.
I don't remember the ice cream.
Like, out of everything that I did at the Capitol, like, I remember sitting on them steps.
eating that ice cream, you know, having the way in that special shed thinking, well, we've made
it now.
Like, I'm sitting here, the government just gave me ice cream, baby.
Ice cream.
That's the best thing I ever did for you, too.
At this point, yeah.
Carter's living his best life.
He had to drive all the way down to doctor's appointment.
I'm getting pictures like he's on a vacation.
Well, you.
He went and he had char-grilled oysters.
Oh, where did he stop at Acme?
No, he's at Drago.
Dregos.
I'm so, I was like, this isn't fair.
That's good for him, man.
He tell him bring you come back.
Does he eat him?
Yeah, that boy will eat it.
He legit wants to eat fried fish eggs.
You think he's going to stop at oyster?
Uh-oh.
Well, I mean, some different strokes were different.
Fried fish eggs.
Y'all fried them crappy eggs, I'll eat them.
I'll try them.
I'm not saying I'm going to like them, but enough people have talked about them.
I am quasi-eat-eat-em.
I pat-ball ate them.
Yeah.
He was different, though.
He was a different cat.
Well, that's like how.
Hard times, man.
tough men, man.
All you, all you,
uh,
in-laws.
He owned a jet and he was still eating them, though.
Yeah, but he didn't start with a jet.
He didn't start with a jet.
On his way to getting to that level.
I mean,
as a kid,
they probably ate every piece of that fish that was available for,
that was edible for consumption.
So,
you know,
that's one of them deals.
You don't know if you like it because you never been forced to try it.
I'm pretty sure I don't like it.
You know, squirrel liver may be great.
I don't know,
but I ain't ever had to eat.
it.
Well, it's like people eating possible.
I can't even leave it.
It's sweet potatoes.
Yeah.
What?
Sweet taters.
You don't eat sweet potatoes?
I ate sweet potatoes, but it's not possible.
Is that like a common, is that like?
Oh, I don't know.
They're paired together.
Yeah.
Growing up, you know, all kin folks ate that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Same with a coon bake.
They put sweet taters with him too.
When you roast a coon and a oven.
Did you just call it a coon bake?
That's what they called it.
Not me.
I like that.
salmon baked.
Yeah.
That's different.
You can get that at the grocery store.
They don't got a raccoon section.
I don't mind salmon raw.
I don't mind salmon.
I'm out on salmon.
Or nagiri or.
I'm out on salmon.
Well, then you'll probably like them.
My wife likes it.
Nasty yellow eggs.
I'll eat them.
I'll try them.
Like, let me know when that goes down and I will try them.
Now, I do, I will say, as much as I love cold fish, I do love cold fried fish the next day.
I don't want to eat those cold.
make sure they're hot.
Like, I want to be the,
like, you know,
like that's one in things like,
I want that as hot as I can physically handle it.
They may be good
because everybody talks about how great caviar is.
Well, that caviar they put on them deviled eggs
over there, parish is good.
Yeah.
Thank you, pardon.
I just say it's got caviar on top of it.
That's what the little black little balls are.
That's pepper.
No, that's caviar.
Oh, it's caviar.
That's caviare.
That's caviore.
That's caviore.
I just changed your world.
I just ruined your favorite appetizer.
That's fish eggs, bro.
Yeah.
No.
No, no.
Seriously.
Yeah.
It is.
That's what that little salty thing, the little salty bite of the deviled egg it pairs is caviar.
Yeah.
Godwin.
It is.
It is.
You know, when you bite into it and you're like, man, that little pop of salt is so good, that's a fish egg.
No, that's like a little season ball.
No.
A fish egg.
That's what it is.
That's fish eggs.
That little salty, briny, little, yeah, that's wild.
I love fried eggs, your chicken eggs, but anything else?
Chicken eggs rule.
Yeah.
I'm done for the day.
He's done.
I've learned something.
I'm in shock.
Can we leave here and go to parish and get some?
Let's go.
No, now I don't know my life anymore.
I might go get some sushi somewhere.
Oh, I do love a rooster rocket.
Man.
What I call deviled eggs, but, boy, they are good.
Oh, anyway, well, we still went through a whole one.
I don't want to.
We covered some ground.
I don't want no cavio.
Caviar, I mean, it's not great.
I'm not a guy that's...
I bet you they would like it if you eat.
Look, I'm going to go ahead and say it.
Them deviled eggs are legit.
I thought that was a season ball.
Don't give you wrong.
I'm not, you know, the ones that's got the fish eggs on them?
No, I ain't eaten.
Hey, sigh, I'm just telling you, they're...
It's one of the...
best bites you can have that involves an egg.
It is good.
What?
The parish deviled eggs.
Like, they are good.
Well, now I'm hungry.
We got a verse to close with.
We'll get on out of here.
Yes, I do.
Luke 11, 11 through 13.
Do you know that one on the top of your head?
They're right?
Because it seriously down it.
Which of you fathers, if your son ask for a fish,
we'll give him a snake instead?
Or if he asks for an egg, we'll give him a scorpion.
if you then though are evil know how to give good gifts to your children how much more will your father in heaven give the holy spirit to those who ask them
that's a good one and it just so happened to cover a lot of stuff we talked about today yeah there you go there you go
well we'll see y'all next time right here in the duck call room we're out we're gone
