Duck Call Room - Justin Martin Panicked After Firing a Gun Near Police

Episode Date: May 20, 2025

Uncle Si shares how coming out of surgery turned violent for him once, and Hunter’s post-surgery anesthesia fog confession is one for the ages! Martin tells the wild story of a late-night backyard shootout with a mysterious intruder that nearly got him in trouble with the law. Rucker opens up about a fresh-out-of-prison situation in his past that led him to shoot first and ask questions later, and John-David receives a nice birthday gift from one nerd to another. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We're good. Hunter, you ready? Oh, Hunter. Hunter got you a gift. What is happening? It's got batteries. Oh, it's got batteries, JD. I'm so excited. Actually, I don't know.

Hunter. Happy birthday. Is this for the... No, start the show. Yeah, start the show. Start the show. Oh, are we rolling? Yeah, we're rolling.

Welcome back to the duck call room. I'm about to say something super weird. Well, welcome. But before... No, it's super weird. Go ahead. Welcome back to the duck call room, ladies and gentlemen. We got to let our fans feel like they're welcome.

Look, today, it's a big day. It is a huge day. Johnny D. is officially closer to 40 than he is 30 now. Amen. Well, that happened last year. No, because you were dead in the middle. Now, there's no turning back. You're steams rolling towards where I'm going to be in a few months.

So 40's on the horizon there, big guy. Happy birthday, Johnny D. 36 today. Happy birthday. Because my family's kind of been in front. Flux. Yeah. Hunter is the first person to give me a birthday present at all.

Yes. Hunter is the only person that has wrapped something in wrapping paper, and you can tell he's the one that wrapped it. Yeah, because that is not done correctly. That's it. That's right. I need, I'm not throwing it. Throw it.

Is it breakable? It's, oh. Oh, my, hold on. Okay, here comes Hunter. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. That's not what they tuned in for. Y'all are terrible.

Happy birthday. Hold on, is this from you, Hunter? Yeah. Happy birthday to you. I am touched. And many more on Channel 4. Also, this podcast is not brought to you by Sonic. Producer Beth brought Johnny D.

Three of his favorite Coke Zeros to try. And we're going to see if he can pick out which flavor has been. Oh, Johnny D. got a Lego. Uh-oh. My dude has a Lego set. A Lego. And it's a combine. It's a combine.

And a Millennium Foulouse. And a millennial album. Hunter, I'm going to put this together and have the time of my life. You should get stoned the same thing for his birthday. Legos are for kids. I do like Legos. And this one does look too advanced for Carter. Hey, look, Hunter didn't even.

Oh, this is going to be fun. Hunter didn't even go with a brand that we get the boys as cheaper than Lego. No, that's. Mega blocks or whatever they're called. If y'all want to sponsor, cool, but y'all stink. Yeah, they don't fit very well. Oh, right. You know, for the boys, they're perfect right now.

I'm going to put this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm going to put this millennium balcony together today. Yeah. And they brought me Coke Zero. They can't eat them. Yeah, so the job on the Coke Zero is to see. You got to guess the flavor.

They're flavored and you have to guess which flavors have been added. I didn't drink it. That one was ready. Don't turn your nose up now. Come on. I don't know what this is. This is bad. Okay.

There's coconut in this. Oh, coconut. Oh, there's a coconut. A coconut zero? I thought it looked like a lime. But it's... There's a lime in there. You do something to camouflage it, right?

Put some lime in the coconut. Is it? Am I drinking right now? I hope so. I hope so. This thing can only get better. Hey. I legitimately don't know what's in this.

Well, taste another one. Try that one. I ain't drank that. I just put it in there. All right, what's it like? That's pickle juice. Pickle juice. Okay.

Really? Pickle juice. So you're getting hydrated? What is, I thought this was nice. Y'all playing jokes. Hey. No,

that's legitimately a pickle inside that one. Nailed that one. There's people that enjoy pickle juice. And I think there's rum in this one. Oh, but I don't know. Hey, if there's not, you can go to my office and there can be.

Okay. What's that one? If there's rum in it, just hand it to me. That's a standard rig. Nothing? That's standard rig. We got pickles,

standard rig. And I don't. And then like strawberry. I take it. I tasted the lime, but there's, it's got to be coconut. Is it? Coconut. Does you make it dirty option?

I know. I didn't know Sonic was getting in on our tradition. Like it dirty. I threw liquor. And here we go. There's dirty off disclaimer. No liquor is in any of these. I can tell you what I'm not going to do.

Go to Sonic and get my standard corn dog and tell them to make it dirty. I have to know. Because I don't want to know what that would include. I want a foot-long chili cheese, Connie, and I want you to make it dirty. Make it real dirty. Is this on the menu? The pickle? Real dirty.

Beth's walking to a mic. We're finally going to get talked to Beth. Okay, Beth. My birthday wishes that Beth would be on the podcast. Here we got. All right. So apparently they used to do the pickle add-on, and I didn't realize that they'd stop, but they did it special for you today.

They just took probably the pickles that go on the corn dogs or the burgers. A half a pickle jar in this. This is mainly pickle juice. Pickle juice, boy. Which ain't bad. I mean, you're hydrate, man, got the salt, got the vinegar. You're hydrating, man. It's pickle juice.

It is about to be softballed. But he's going to end up in that standard rig. Hey, you need to take that over to Christian on the pickleball court. Throw it at him? No, they didn't have it for a drink. Pickle ball don't actually involve pickles, son. Well, hey. But it could.

It can. Man, it feels like, I feel special. Hunter getting me legos. drinks and Lego. Man, happy ninth birthday, bro. That's tight.

You're only as old as you feel. I am a child. I will say this is not, this was the first rap gift because my other gift, this is the age I'm at and the week I'm having. My refrigerator went out,

so my mom, she's like, what can I get you for your birthday? And I said, just some lowest gift cards to just take the ease of having to buy a new refrigerator off. Man, adult gifts are the best,

though. I love getting an adult gift, man. You know, it's way cooler than a fridge. The Millennium Falcon. You know, the last thing, I'll let me tell you, the last thing that my dad bought me for a gift, Christmas of that year, a blower. And I still use that thing and I love it and I laugh every time.

I love adult gifts. I think it's cool that y'all, you know, actually get gifts. Well, it didn't mean to bring up that part of trauma. I mean, now that you're a therapist, you probably get through it. Yeah. I mean, I've worked past it, but it's because I'm trying to. transparently open, you know, about it. Yeah.

So it's cool that you got a gift. My mom will bug the fire out of you. What do you think your kids got you? I can't say it yet. I know what they got me because I paid for it. Oh, okay. But we haven't told them. That that's what they got you?

That that's what we might be going to the happiest place on earth again this year. Oh. But they got you that for your birthday. Yeah. Yeah. You're going to get another lightsaber? No, no. That was way too.

expensive. We're going, we're driving this time too. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Podcast is struggling, folks. Please like and subscribe, like us, comment. Use code duck wherever you can. So I can. Even if they ain't got it. Just type it in. When you get to a coupon code somewhere, put in duck. Tell them we sent you there. I don't know. No, we're going with Allison's parents this summer. That was what we decided to do this summer. Oh, okay. That's fun. Disney, baby. Run that Disney back. That'll be fun. And I hope they don't live. Well, I think we're telling them before this airs. But, and I also got Ben's a gift and Carter for good grades this year. I didn't know how good they were, but that Nintendo Switch 2 coming out.

So that's coming in the mail. And that's for me too. Well, what did you get Lottie then? Because you can't just get the boys. She didn't make good grades. No, yeah. And look, I agree with that. I'm just kidding.

For real? Lottie's whole life is fine. She's good. Here's the deal. You don't get participations, okay? You don't get a gift just because everybody else is getting a gift. That's true. You got to teach them early.

So you got twins, so it's a little bit different. Yeah, I get two of everything. Right, you know what I mean? That's for you, not for them. Yeah. They won't. No, I get two just to, I tried the, you know, they're what, two and a half? We've tried the one and one and to force the sharing.

Yeah. But it just initiates a fight. See, no is in high school. At this point, we're not, they're not old enough to reason with just yet. So we're still on the identical toys for both boys. But it is funny. they gravitate and whalen is he that that kid's wild they can be the identical thing but once he identifies one of them as his it's his he knows which one that is between the two and it is the craziest thing

i have ever seen i'm like how do you know well i fix that attention to detail yeah there's something different there's something different about each one of them he knows that only he knows because i've tried to go like their favorite thing when we ride in a car is to take a truck for whatever reason. So I've tried to go get just a random truck and he's like, no, that's Jackson's. And I'm like, buddy, there was, there were two, there were two of them sitting there. How am I supposed to know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, you know, they just got their twins, you know, identical, but still, still. Now, yeah, they ain't identical. They ain't identical. They're not identical. No, God. No, they don't even look like brothers at this point. I thought that they were identical.

No. No. It's just, right. Pay attention, man. No, it's fine. Hey, but. You just, man. You just had so would you you just your wife celebrating her first mother's day huh yeah yeah yeah well so she started as a bonus mom last year oh okay yeah but but this year's got a whole other whole other vibe how'd that go for you man it went really good i think i did good i got her some gifts that made her smiling why would you get her kids she ain't her kid huh what you ain't her kid oh wow we really go in there what do you mean well her kid i stand by that's them So Noah is in high school. He's a teenage boy.

Yeah, that's his job. Yeah, he got her card and he helped promote the gift. But like, I'm going to just tell you, these teenage boys are a whole other spectrum of dealing with things. I mean, really. Well, they're wild animals. I mean, I'm just telling you. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up.

You know what that means? That means more outside cooking. And y'all know. We love to eat beef around here. and that's what because of our friends over at try-tails beef makes such a good product ain't it good it's so good it's our friend sall robertson would say buy on the grill look before we got tritels getting ready for a cookout man somebody had to run the grocery store do all the things grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day and you never really

know where that beef come to them but with tritels beef we skip the grocery store and do it a different way tritels comes from a family ranch out in texas they're a fifth generation of American ranch. So they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check

out try tails beef i know in size case christine loves it which is just a uh she doesn't eat me yeah just go to try beef dot com slash duck that's try beef dot com slash duck support ranch families and eat some dang good steak at one point there will be a 17 and 15 year old sharing a room in my house boys oh dude you might have to upgrade you might have to add on yeah you may have to hollered at remodeler. Yeah, man. I got a guy. You might have to put one of them out there in a garage.

Oh, yeah, no, no, no, yeah, that'd be cool. Uh-uh. Yeah. As a kid who grew up in a queen-sized bed and a little bit spoiled, a little bit, a little bit. Time out, son. I mean, I'm just saying. There's a middle road somewhere that me and you can meet at. But I don't see anything wrong with kids sharing room.

You got share a room when you get made. Might as well get used to it. Yeah, but it's different when it's your 15-year-old brother and you're 17. I ain't never had a brother. No, no, no. I mean, but obviously. Well, like, what we're getting at here is, like, when you got these two boys. You shared a room with Phil, huh?

Well, yeah, but I get what are you talking about? You got to have your own space. And that helps them build independence. Like, you want, what you want during that time period is for the 17-year-old to walk in and say, Dad, this is just not working. Do I have your permission to put together my own space in the garage? That's the most ideal situation. That's how you know you have reached the level.

Like, all right. I reckon that's why Willie lived in that cook shack growing up because he got tired of Allen. No, no, it is. You know, you ain't got no space. No, you ain't. Somebody's always in your space and that's not a good thing. And look, I'm a guy that didn't have space anywhere. I mean, why?

What's you trying to do in private? Well, I'm just saying, hey. Whatever would you do at 15 years? I'm just saying, hey, man, need his privacy. What could you possibly need privacy for? Okay, okay. Yeah, Carter and Ben sharing a room forever. You want your own room, go buy it.

I rent it one month at a time, kids. This is my house. Oh, good grief. Oh, boy. Well, they're going to move out like a year later. I ain't changing that. Buddy, we in the 2000s. They ain't moving out until six years later.

Oh, no. Mine is that eight. This is the age and hey, they come back when they get grown. Yeah, them days of 18, oh, wrong. Well, that's why I'm paying for OCS. I mean, you know. That's why you pay for OCS is that they leave at 18. Oh, do they?

They better. I'm going to check. I'm going to. They better. I'm going to be up. at OCS trying to get a refund check. I'm going to check back with you in three years. Our home boy's leaving.

He's leaving. Mainly because we don't have the room. I mean, I'm having a remodel for this current baby. I need to then move. Are you saying another baby coming after this one? I mean, I would like to have a girl. I mean, really, I would. Oh, man, I don't know that we need one of those.

A female rucker? Yeah. Hey, man. Hopefully she'll be like your wife. No, I think she would be. Well, I don't know. I'm trying to figure out what's worse, a female rucker or another male one. That's what I'm saying.

Because I create clones, apparently. Yeah. Like, Noah is a replica. That's true. Yeah. He just hit his growth spurt and kept going. Yeah, yeah, yeah. His didn't stop.

But he also wasn't doing the things that I was doing to stunt that growth. You know what I'm saying? What stunts growth? I don't know. Newport shorts in a box. I thought that only happened in the womb. I didn't know it happened when you were outside. Newport shorts in the box, a couple of...

I'm going to have to Google that if I'm going to be on. A couple of Philly mini blunts. Uh-oh, I'm in front of the other camera. Hunter trying to move something. Do I get out there, Hunter? The tractor, Hunter tags to me, my Lego set was blocking the view of our beautiful host style. Oh, there it is.

Well, it's too big of a combine, man. I put it there. I probably shouldn't have told you. you as a combine would you have known that as a combine by looking at he'd have called it a that's a john deer forage harvester what's that what's that 97 hundred yeah us redneck call it a combine yeah not a harvester oh that's an international harvester no it ain't international that's a green one no no that's that's that's john deer boys yeah oh yeah that's that's on brand man hunter trying to act like he a farmer that's that's cool man he's

he's got me the farmer thing then he was like hey but just for us nerds He tried to hide that Millennium Falcon behind the tractor. I got so excited when I saw this. If we're getting on a Star Wars conversation, have y'all finished Android? No, stop it. What? I've been through a lot and I haven't been able to watch it. I just quit talking right now.

I'm not going to spoil anything. No spoiler. I wouldn't do that. I haven't finished it myself. Okay, well, I'm way behind. Oh, okay. I haven't even gotten started. You should.

It's a Graham show. No, no, I'm good. I don't need more things to watch. I don't either. I'm in a hobby shrinking. category, not expanding. So, no new hobbies. In fairness, you have very expensive hobbies.

I do, yeah. And I got, there's two mantras at the Martin house. No new hobbies, no new pets. That's where we're at right now. But you're leaving space for a new girl. I would qualify that at that age under pets. Yeah. Under pets. Yeah.

I'll say this. Until I get the current one's house broken, they're still essentially pets. I agree with the no pets thing. I think pets are part of the problem with America. Uh-oh. Oh, we're about to go down. Oh, you're anti-pets. I'm anti-pet. Oh, man.

I'm anti-pet. Why? Expound. Get blasted. Well, no, I mean, like, I'm not going to make a lot of people happy with this. Pets become very emotional, especially when they pass away. Yeah, well, I just, I don't know. All right, so let me just refrain.

Maybe not pets in general. You want to have a fish? Great. Get you a fish. But, like, my thing is when you buy a dog, right? first of all, if you spend thousands of dollars on a dog that doesn't have any purpose, right? Now, Martin, dog, hunting dog, purpose.

Makes sense. Okay, perfect. There's a purpose. I believe that they should have a purpose other than sitting in the living room soaking up air condition all day. That's just where I'm at. It's not that I'm anti-pet.

I just look. But see, my boys are at the age where the animal, every animal you see needs to be a pet. like turtles bring him in I had four turtles lizards as a kid they always want to bring it in the house

yeah they got to bring it inside they want to show the turtle their trucks and I'm like buddy the turtle doesn't care he could care less about your truck and you're messing up the natural order of thing and he don't want you to drive your truck across his back he's not a pet turtle

I had four pet turtles do you know what I named them I feel like This is a Ninja Turtle. No, no, no. Ninja Turtle thing. I know. Very much so.

But you couldn't really tell them apart. I should have painted them orange, red, blue. Anyways. My mom bought me a Nintendo game to get rid of them. Because they smell. Yeah, turtle steak. So I had them for like a month. She was like, I will, what are we got to do here?

Do you put them in an aquarium? Yeah. Then I put them in a pond. Yeah. Well, you set them free. They live in a natural habitat. Hopefully they weren't. Ox turtles.

Because that wouldn't have worked out too well. Did you find the turtles or did y'all go buy the turtles? I found the turtles, I think. Uh-oh. I would hope so. Oh, man. I removed the turtles from their habitat, kept them for a while, stunk up the house. Yeah.

Was offered. I mean, Jan's a barterer. Turtles, one of them things, though, when you look at him, you don't think about him taking a dump. But they do? I mean, you really know. You look at a turtle. You don't think about him like, well, he's going to take a dump at some point. I've never thought about a turtle pooping

That's what I'm talking about But they eat so much dead and dying stuff Imagine what it smells like after it's been processed Like it ain't good You know it craps a lot goldfish Goldfish yeah well fish yeah I cleaned out that nasty goldfish tank yesterday It was worse than ever

That's what I'm talking about That's why Moana had it right man fish peeing you all day That's all they do They sit there and pee and then they swim in it right Oh yeah no no no I mean that's true I'll tell you where my thing with the dogs truly come from. So you're a dog hater. No, I'm not a dog hater.

There's a dog at our house, but it lived in the woods, right? It was a dog that lived in the woods. My wife started feeding it $400 later. Now it's our dog. No, that's way worse. No. Anyways, we saved this dog. We saved it.

When I say we, I mean my wife. Does it live indoors? No. What's his name? It lives outside. It belongs to the streets. Does it have a name? This dog wants to be in the streets.

Hey, this is loose. Her name is Lucy now. Lucy. Yeah, so see, when pets, when animals get a name, that's when, yeah. Well, whenever you end up with 11 puppies in your mud room, that's whenever it gets real. You didn't tell her what caused them? Well, there was this dog down the road anyways. You know how things happen, people. I mean, come on.

Yeah. But. I was that dog at one point of my life. Me and you both. But look, so, so here's the thing. I had my, I remember one Christmas whenever I was real young, my mom got me this dog. It was a pit bull and her name was Jambi, right? Don't ask me, I just came up with it.

Jambi, right? Well, there was some guys that lived down the road that, you know, were allegedly involved with dog fights and various other, you know. Nefarious activities. And so, anyways. Jambi comes up missing, right? And so we're looking for Jambi. We don't know where Jambi went. We'll come to find out the guys down the road had Jambi.

And then I'm crying, right? And I'm upset and I'm like, Mom, we got to get Jambi back. And she said, no, Jambi's gone. Jambi's gone. You got to charge that one to the game. We ain't going down there messing with them dudes. Yeah. Because they're another level.

One of them end up playing quarterback for the first. Falcon. No. I just wonder. No. But I'll tell you, but again, it's just like you spend outrageous

amounts of money for something that doesn't have purpose other than to be in the house. And then what people are going to say in the comments, what about emotional support? Oh boy. Right? That's what they're going to say. Now trust me, as a counselor, I've heard all this before, and I understand.

I'm just going to say me personally, I think that you can find emotional support through authentic healthy community that doesn't involve a dog. Not saying that that dog doesn't help, but you need authentic healthy community. So what you're saying is you need something that can talk back. You need somebody that can hold you accountable. Yeah.

You need somebody that can love you. Yeah, you're going to get blasted. I've been enough trouble lately. I'm, hey everybody, I'm here this week to take the heat off of Johnny Deerey. Also, leave your dog at your home. I don't want your dog. You want your dog. Don't bring your dog into my territory.

That's all I'm saying. Oh, like, you bring your dog everywhere you go type people? Mm-hmm. You sound like you're talking about somebody. No. Go ahead and expound. Put an address on it, home. Yeah, go ahead and expound, friend.

I love everybody's dog. You know, I've been in a lot of places with Sai. You know what he's never brought with him? Sweet pee. Sweet pee. That'd be annoying. I was about to hit you over sweet pee right now. I'm fine if you want to have sweet pee at your house,

but don't like let me touch it. I'm allergic to cats. I throw him on you then. Throw him in his lap. Here, catch. Oh, hey, hold this boy for a while. If you've made it further in the episode, I just want everybody to know.

I appreciate that you have animals that you love. I'm a huge advocate for all of that. Well, look, there is. here about a week ago, you could argue that I had a pet armadillo as much as he was hanging around in the house and tearing up my yard. Goodness. I was exorcite. They are destructive.

But I don't have. They'll tear some stuff out. But let me tell you something. I don't have a pet armadillo anymore. That's right. Wait till you see this. That was a fun little chess match, me and him played. Oh, man.

You don't tell me how big he was. Oh, wait until you see it. We get them all over the place in my house. But, hey, that is a grown-in-old. Boy, he's a bull. Oh, yeah. Oh, that's a good size. that is the biggest armadela and they are very uh they carry a lot of disease and that's why he has

the gloves people take of the gloves oh yeah i don't mess with him yeah i mean they are it's hard to get leprosy from them but they do carry leprosy they do uh they're they're very but you know just you know i got kids now so i got to be a little more uh careful about what i put my hands on but no it was a fun little chess game with my guy oh yeah look i'm I'm not even holding him out like a fish picture either. So like, I mean, I could have straight-armed him and made him look even bigger. But no, it was, so we, me and Johnny D.

and our wives went out on a town other night. Then when I got to the neighborhood, I got to go on like two miles an hour, and Johnny D. was like, what are you doing? What's you trying to kill, man? And I said, I'm looking for that armadillo, man. This is the time he generally is out and about. But that night he wouldn't.

And Johnny D. said, well, what are you going to do with him? I said, I got a gun in my truck. Oh, you hit him with your everyday carry? Oh, yeah, he got the, no, I went in and got the 22 on this one, the 22 pistol, which is hard enough. I mean, you see, I'm in a neighborhood, man. It's hard to find an angle where you ain't shooting at something. So, you know, I slid out there the next night, and there he was. And so, then, it's so funny, man.

I slid out there, I got up next to the fence. I was like, okay, if I keep his fence, because they don't see very well, and I know that. But I slid out there and then I take a step toward him. He turned and look. So he's listening, you know, and then I'd be like, I got nervous. Yeah, he hard. I got like I was going, I got like I was deer hunting, man. Like, because me and him, we got a history now.

Because he didn't get that size last night. So he'd been after me for a while and always been able to slick me. But I finally, I got that rascal. But the funniest part was, and Brittany was right there in the garage, watching everything go down. as soon I kid you not as soon as I pulled that trigger

sirens and I was like oh god so then I start scrambling I'm like I get the magazine I get the magazine out of my pistol take one out to hip

thinking you know we're close enough to 71292 that could be domestic violence or something you never know at that time of night you know I mean that ain't one good things happen when I got him now Armid does never die

at normal hour And the last thing you want to hear when you let off a shot in a neighborhood is a siren. It's a siren. And, of course, then next thing goes from mine, because he, you know, Armadilla is pretty tough. He toaded that for a second. So he took off running. So I was like, oh, I got to go get him to prove my innocence, you know. Like, I don't live in the city limits, so I can discharge a firearm.

It's fine. But, like, it just, then I went into, like, full-blanc, man, here come to police. Like, everything. I'm about to get, I'm about to get 97 questions about killing an armadale. Here we. Take it probably. Here we go. Somebody going to get me for something.

But I got, but they, it was just happenstance that the, uh, that the sirens and the gunshot, I had nothing to do with me. But boy, I thought it did. If you'd have seen me scrambling, I had the gun in one hand, the magazine in my back pocket. I don't know where the bullet that went in the, the chamber went. I just, I just, I just shook that, baby. It's out there in my yard. Yeah, I try to find that thing for you mow your lawn.

But my favorite, oh, I ain't worried about that. We've had so much rain. It's probably don't wash down hill by now. But look, as my favorite. favorite part, you see I right there on that sewer drain, that's right at the corner of my mailbox. So after I took the picture with my foe, I sat him on that sewer drain as the inch, kind of because it's like the entrance to my yard. Just to let his buddies know. Don't you come around him? You don't walk. Yeah. If there was more than one of y'all,

look at what happened to him. So far, we've been good, you know? Yeah, Viking good place. Yeah. You know that, uh, man, you pay a lot of money for that stuff, man. Had on a skate. And everything. Man, you know how much money I've spent? in a fast-growing trees to get that thing right. All they do, that's right. Hey, all them things do is dig and root and dig. Yeah. In Texas, they race them.

Because, hey, these things got claws like my fingers. Oh, you, when I was sitting there, like, most of them getting ready to do the deal, just hearing him, like, you don't want to. Have y'all never heard of that? What, racing the armadillo races. That one wouldn't have been so good at it.

He was, he was beefy. He wasn't going to win. No, they do. They do. It's a true story. I seen it when I was a kid. They'd race the armadillos. But I was...

My wife, we got your old sweet pea, and then there's other four or five cats that live in the neighborhood hang out at our house because she's been feeding them. That's your cats, bro. No, no, no. So I come home one day for filming,

and she said, you need to run me down there. I'm about a cat food. You know? And she said, I can't believe it. I just bought a 50-pound bag like two days ago. Oh, they eating. They eating good.

You know, so she pours bowls out on the front and back port. Okay. Oh, yeah. So, you know, I heard something. You all went to click the line on and look through the little window. And, hey, there's three coons, and I'm telling you, this is not a story. I'm looking at, hey, these are Arnold Schwarzenegger Coons. Oh, yeah.

Okay. They weigh about a hundo or 125 pounds. Okay. And look, there's three of them on the porch. Collectively or each. Oh, each. Oh, man. I'm looking at a piece.

I'm looking and said, I said, baby, you need to quit feeding them stupid cats. I said, it's just dangerous. Because they're not cats. Oh, no. They raccoon. Look, I couldn't believe. I should have took a picture. I'm serious.

When I looked, I said, good. With your cell phone? A hundred pound. So I should have fired up that Samsung Galaxy. Oh, no, no, look, I'm serious. You're talking about the bull, okay, all three of them. And all of us with an iPhone would have got a blurry picture. He wouldn't, no, he had disposable cameraman.

Or a pole rolling. In Houston one time, there was this corner store. And this guy had raccoons all in the dumpster of the corner store. And so me and my friends were like, man, what if we just go in there and ask him if, like, he'll let us eradicate the raccoons from that dumpster. and I mean What was they doing to y'all? Nothing.

We were bored. They didn't this kind of drunk. I was bored. And so we, and so the guy was like, yes, yes. Please get rid of them. Get rid of them. And so we did. You almost did an impression.

I decided you didn't want to. And that was my favorite part of my birthday so far. Hey, look, well, I lived in Alabama. Yeah, you were headed towards a stereo. No, no, yeah, yeah. You got away from it. Yeah, I got away from it. Well, I lived in Alabama.

I had to go to work at 4.30 a.m. Okay. So it's dark. Uh-huh. And I always wondered when we would cut, I look, there's dead Coons everywhere on the highway. Mm.

Okay, and I was wondering, what in the world? You know, well, I was coming around a curve there, and, hey, there's one. This I didn't know, okay? Coon is aggressive. Oh, yeah, no, they don't play.

They got rabies. Because look, he's in the middle of the road, and the headlights hit him and won the headlights hit him. Hey, this is it standing. hands up like a grizzly bear. Towed it like a man, did he?

No, no. Go look and look, hey, I was down on Phil's property squirrel on one day and I come walk in the middle levee. Okay, and that's one of the biggest coons I've seen down there. You know, he's just on the edges of the levee. You know, look around. Well, I just, you know, I had 30-30 out deer hunting. I thought we squirrel a hunt.

No, no. Got to, buddy. We squar hunting with that 30-th century. He's squirreling with that 30-thony, boy. He's after some of them 100-pound squirrels. No, you got that 125-bile coon. I said it wrong.

I was here, and I'll slip it through the wood. So anyway, this is a big cun over right down there. So look, I just, I just knocked that at him. Well, that sucker raised up history. I said, wrong, handsome buddy. Oh, yeah. So when I talk, you know, he run up a tree, and I said him gets their trucking.

and just took a plug out of him. Oh, hey, I blew him out of top of that tree. I once put... This is me, sucker. I once put several holes in my own kitchen floor trying to shoot a possum one time with a 9mm. Wait, what? Hey, man's got to do what he's got to do.

No, I mean, no joke. Hey. You couldn't just run him out of there? That was not on my mind. No, no. All right. Look. I got it going on this.

When we lived in Alabama, look, in our bathroom, there was a little square just in the floor. Oh, like for plumbing or something. Like, you were off the ground. Hey, I didn't ever know it, y'all. Hey, it was just, it would just sit in there.

Yeah, get you to the cross. My wife goes, it's like 1 a.m. in the morning. She goes into the use of the restroom and comes back out and she said, hey, you need to go kill that big rat to see me in the bathroom. So I go in there expecting their rat.

No, it's about a 15 pound pussel. Mm. You know what I? In your bathroom? Yeah. Oh, no, they'll get in the house. Oh, yeah. Because he just, he just pushed the thing up.

Come on in. So I was living. Did you shoot him in the bathroom? Oh, yeah. Let me just tell you. Oh, I'm like a rucker. I shot a big hole. I mean, I was staying at, I was staying at this person's trailer, essentially.

This was after I'd gotten out of a bar. prison and stuff. I was kind of on a Texas tour. Anyways. I was staying in, I was staying in this guy's trailer and it was a little dilapidated. Just, you know, I mean, it wasn't a, it wasn't a nice trailer. Anyway, I was staying in a side pad. No, I wasn't no side pad, baby. You know, so look, I was stayed at this trailer and there was a open bag of dog food up underneath the, like, island in the kitchen, right? And I'm sitting there. I'm playing Xbox doing some other extracurricular activities. And I hear something in that bag of dog food just ruffling around and stuff. And back then, I was kind of paranoid and I was more of a shoot first-ass question later than the guy.

So I've seen something. So I just happened to have a nine millimeter on the coffee table. Like any person would while playing X-I. So look. And I kid you not, I grab that nine-millimeter and I just start dumping into that bag of dog food. That's so messed up, man. Come to find out it's a possum, and I missed about five times. Did he play dead? No, he was dead. All I can picture is that scene from Dumb and Dumber? Harry, you're alive, and you're a terrible shot.

I mean, that's all I can see. What I'm thinking of Rucker, I'm assuming, partially stoned on something, and just firing away randomly. I was- Let me just tell you something right now. all size deal. If I walk in the bathroom at 1 a.m. And there's a possum.

Buddy, you're going to have a whole different mess to clean up than a dead possum. Because if I'm going to the bathroom at one, something has happened. Oh, yeah. It's urgent. And then when I see that, something going to be sprayed everywhere.

And I don't know. I mean, it clarifies to what it would be. But what, yeah, possums, I mean, I don't know if we've talked about this or not. But we found one,

Brittany got the video somewhere. Yeah, because there was one in Corey's house. Oh, yeah, that was the one. That's where we, yeah, there was a little possum that got in Brittany's glove box of her car. Oh, wow. And you shot the car like any normal person? No, I grabbed. Oh, you didn't?

No, I grabbed the possum and put him out of it. I just, I put on it on it. Oh, are we going to act like what I did is just that far-fetched? Yeah. No. I'm assuming that the five holes you put in the floor weren't the first five holes, so maybe not. I will say they didn't, they didn't decrease the value. you at all.

If anything added a nice little bin. Yeah, I can't, I don't have anything. No, no weird. Well, the only possible store, you Dublin killed that one at time. I have shot a gun indoors, but it was here to test out the. Yeah, the shot. Back when this place was fun. We were testing out security, so we shot holes in the roof to see if security would show up and they didn't.

Yeah, I can't do that. Which is a natural thing to do. This was fun. I was at tech and I worked at the sheriff's office as a radio man. man okay we get a call okay seven lehm has been robbed and and this older deputy goes to it well when he pulls up he and he's opened the door and the guys back and out look well he just starts firing windmill well deputy just pulled it pulled his and they're having a gunfight between from the car he's shooting out of the wind seal. The other guy's bad guy shooting in

the hit it, you know. And they teased this guy the whole time. What are you doing shooting up to windshield? You know you wanted to pay for that, right? And he said, I ain't paying for it. He said, he busted it first. He said, all I want to do will stop shooting him at me.

We've progressed to full-blown shootout stories. I'm not getting involved in any of those stories. Yeah, what you got in that regard? I'd I'd rather not disclose any of those stories. Well, I'm like that deputy. I probably would have blew the windshield out too, just so the guy I quit shooting.

Well, it's definitely the safest way to go other than getting out of the vehicle. I mean, there's ways to look at. Anyway. This is why I stay in the same, like, two-mile radius. No, no, dude, it was impressive. Like, whenever you were thinking about selling that truck, and I was like, how many miles it's got on it? And it was like a ridiculously low amount. And I was like, well, John David didn't drive nowhere.

No, yeah. No. I got gas the other day. Hey, on about an eight-mile loop. That's what I'm saying, ain't it? Yeah. Hey, I got gas the other day. I got this new app and it gets your cheap gas at the place right beside where I work.

Oh. And then I was like, so now it's keeping up with every time I get gas, four weeks. Last time you filled up? I go every four. I get gas every four weeks. Man, you got to venture out more. Nope. No, that's just.

My metamorphosis into Big Dave is almost complete. He's getting there. Oh, yeah, you are getting that. You just got to get you a boat next. Yeah, I just need a bigger boat. And I'm not quite to the point where I'm going to tell somebody exactly how I feel. I haven't quite reached that point yet. But I'll tell you, and you're getting there without having to go through the explosive anger phase, which is really good.

Well, that's because I went through that phase with him. I was his child. Not only that. That's because you don't work for your in-laws no more. Anyways. I think that kind of probably fueled it a little bit in him. Hunter, we need to talk about Hunter, by the way, now that we're, it's my birthday, so I'm going to steer this conversation.

Take it. He gave me a gift so he couldn't make fun of him, but now we can because that time has passed. Hunter, are you okay? Well, after laughing, it kind of hurts again, but I'm okay. Hunter had major medical procedures. I don't know about major. I mean, you went under the knife, man. He went under the knife.

under the knife. And so Hunter, he probably didn't know after you told me this story yesterday that I was going to bring this up. Yeah, I had it. Yeah, I did. You did you? Yeah. So you baited me into this?

No. Oh, okay. Oh, I got the best Hunter line ever. Hunter's playing chess. Y'all are playing checkers. No. So I was sitting in here recording an audio-only thing, and Hunter walked in, pulled up a chair, and he's just sitting there talking.

Hunter, who helped you get dressed post-surgery? My dad. Aw, that's sweet. go ahead hunter so my dad was really uncomfortable like really really uncomfortable were you butt naked yeah yeah well now it's a little uncomfortable you're a full grown man and what did you what'd you tell him uh i told him if he if he sees anything down there he better he's got to take pictures and send it to my friends that's not what you said yesterday hunter oh what did i say you said if it looks big send it to my friend

And I only make this joke because I know after a similar area surgery, that I'm not talking about the vasectomy, I had a completely different one. But when you're coming off of being put under, like that little fog that you're in, you get told you say some pretty wild stuff. Yeah. Like, you know, Hunter's just fresh out of recovery room

and his dad's trying to get his pants on him. He said if it looks big, take a picture. It was under my friend. Hey, hey. I said, why didn't I get a text, man? So my dad was really uncomfortable, and so I thought making jokes would make it better for everyone. I didn't know the nurses could hear us.

Oh, this gets better. Why did you put, you should have underwear on. I had brain surgery and kept my underwear on. They put that little mesh surgery underwear on you, man. So you got to get that. of that stuff. No, I didn't. No.

Oh, they didn't give you that. No, I was butt naked. Butt naked. Oh, he was a butt-making, boy. Well, you didn't tell me you had the surgery in Tijuana. Yeah, what doctor? Hey.

The hernia itself was like at my groin. Uh-huh. But they made incisions on my stomach. Oh. I have three incisions on my stomach. One was to pump me full of gas. One was for a camera. Yeah.

And one was to... That all checks out. Tom, what's the pumping you full of gas? To create. create space in there so they can see. It's because he don't take any vitamins. The hernia, that's not from you. He says gas, just air.

They're just putting air in there. I'm just saying, there's a new medical mystery about you every time I come in this way. How has your nutrition been? Have you been eating cleaner? How good was that first fart? Oh, it was magical.

Oh, it was magical. Yeah. Well, so I hadn't seen Hunter in a week, and he texts me to check in on me. He's like, hey, man, praying for your family. And, you know, everybody always trying. trying to help out and all anybody can do is like bring food but I'm like my kitchen's fine y'all yeah we go quit bringing me food you bring me a refrigerator though yeah well good point and hunter said

that's what broke the refrigerator all the food hunter hunter said let me know if I can do anything as long as it doesn't involve lifting anything over five pounds that's why you got them legos yeah yeah they're about 12 ounces I got to giggling I said hunter go come help me move no he ain't helping me pick a hell do anything And then I said, you can't lift because I can only lift emotions right now. And that did lift my emotions. The only thing I can lift up is your spirits, buddy. Yeah, that's what I'm hit me with. Well, we're glad you're okay.

Are you okay on? How long are you unable to lift things? Six weeks. Yeah. Six weeks. Milk that, buddy. Yeah, he's going to. Hey, nobody going to remember the timeline.

You can get away with this for at least three months. I'm just saying. He's going to milk it. I have a lot to do in June, so I can't. milk it that much. Well, there you go. You got a big gym plan? Yeah, lift a lot of weight in June or were you? A little bit, yeah. I'm on a deadlifting

tour. I have a short film I'm running audio for. I have a wedding I'm going to film and then I have to be a groomsman for a wedding. Being a groomsman is a lot of heavy lifting. Yeah, you got to pay for a tux and then they give you like a pocket knife as a

thank you. You know what we haven't done in a while more? We need to talk. I know you said we had an update. Yes. Hello at duckcallroom.com. We don't get a lot of emails anymore because we've been doing voicemails.

Yeah. But I'm still reading the emails, except for like a couple days. I missed it like three weeks ago. And there's 190 to catch up on. Sorry for those people. But hello at duck callroom.com. We are almost to 25,000 emails in our life, by the way. Okay.

That's good. But summer night. Summer night. The mother of... The mother of old. Taledega Knight of Daiga. She has proven

well she has we don't have a birth certificate but she sent a bunch of family photos Okay And now we finally That guy's daughter is totally named Talladega Night like I'm not doubt Okay well the guy in the middle

I think he's the one on the left There's Taladega herself Oh Oh in her own collector Where shout out Michael Waddell Anyway there's the Knight family That's a Waddell fan Yeah

Oh for sure Yeah buddy Yeah So the girl's name is Tala Day. Wait, time about Go back to that. Are they like demolition

Derby? No, no, no, no. That's old dirt track. That's a dirt track. Well, yeah, I just, that one looks like it's been Thursday. That one's got some, that one's got a testimony.

That car. That's what I looked like 12 years ago. Yeah. Rolling up in there on Mother's Day, son. That's what I look like. Yeah. Anyway, that, hey, I'm proud to know these people. Talent.

I'm proud to be in their corner. They named their daughter. We were talking about, and you're here. You kind of started the whole discussion. But they said. Yeah, on different names. Different names. And she wins.

No, Taladay, good night. That is their kid's name. That is the most awesome thing I have ever heard in my life. But haven't you just typecast that girl for the rest of her life on? Don't matter. No, dude, that's cool, man. Right. Did you see the family photos?

She was typecast second she was conceived. son because if you ain't first your last I mean so was I so were you how old you got to be so was he he's shooting floor floorboards

we're all typecast might as well get your name on it too Taladaghan look at Hunter one day he's gonna be dressing his full grown child has random illnesses poor

poor honor man I'm just saying the apple don't fall far from the tree poor hunter his dad and granddad tried to will him to be one, but it just ain't their boys. Hey, well, look, I appreciate that we had that conversation and that we learned about this extremely awesome name.

Talladega. Oh, man, that is cool. That is awesome. That is really cool. Now, like, the pressure's really up if you listen and your last name is Knight. You got to come up with something cool. Yeah, I don't.

I don't think anybody's going to beat Talladega. I just like she Oh, what's up for that? Who is that? Oh my gosh. That was just before Hunter said, take a picture if it looks big. Hey, you kind of.

That was during. Look at him. Why do you have the blanket over your head? Oh, you look like one of the apostles from the chosen. You look like you want to be a Jedi that's walking around asking questions and acting like nobody. That's what happens when you order a Jedi off of a T-moot. Listen, that's what you get. This was wild.

So they gave me the I don't care drugs, wheeled me into the operating room, and then my heart started beating. I was like, oh, that's an operating room if I've ever seen one. I lay my head down on the table. I'm backwards from 10. I don't even remember that. The moment I laid my head down,

I woke up with warm, heated towels and blankets over my head and my entire body. Oh, that'll freak you out. That'll freak you out. No idea why, but I have never been more comfortable in my life. They must have run you down to the morgue if you got that card. Well, they said after the surgery, which was like 30, 45 minutes, I wouldn't wake up. They tried to wake me up.

And I was just passed out for like two hours. Oh, when they reversed it. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I don't come off anesthesia. I don't either because I got a good story about it. Look, I had a cyst, okay, on my privates. So, hey, I had it cut out.

Look, yo. You're private? Oh, yeah. No, look, I'm fine. I'm walking down the base one day on the sidewalk. And there's a dude coming toward me in scrubs. You know? Uh-huh.

You know, he's coming. And the closer he gets, he starts stepping off of the sidewalk and making it like a half-serk, half-moon away. Yeah, he ain't trying to be around. Yeah. Yeah. And when we get even, he said, yeah, he's the one that bid me. Well, hey, this causes a big crowd.

The next day I know I was around, I said, hey, I've never seen this climb before my life. Uh-oh. And he said, let me explain. He said, I was in the recovery room, and you wouldn't wake up. And he said, so I slapped you. And I said, bad move, dude. So even asleep, you don't like to be slapped. I said, hey, my mama don't even slap me.

Oh, Lord. Oh, man. And so you bid him? I bid him. Hey, look. And look, this was like three weeks later. And, hey, my teeth marks were still very plain on this guy's arm. Hunter, do you buy anybody?

I did not. Then he'd end up at the dentist if he did. Hey, when you get done with surgery, if they can't wake you up, they get chookers. You know, it gets serious business. Well, yeah, because that's the, you got to start time. Yeah, you got to start a time frame. They got to get you a. Well, the slapping is actually a matter.

They call it stimulation. You stimulate them. But Si said he wasn't doing no slapbogg's, he's standing on business. Well, speaking of standing on business, we got to get the heck out of here because me and I got to go film Duck Dynasty. So Johnny Dee, you got us a verse. Psalm 374. Take the light and the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Amen, buddy. Lighten the Lord first. Mr. Rucker, thank you for joining us again here in the duck call room. Johnny Dee, happy 36 birthday. birthday, buddy. And Hunter. We're going to get a pizza. We're glad to have you back.

We can throw paper at you again. I love you. I'm going home to do Legos. Don't lift nothing, Hunter. Yeah, don't lift a thing. We'll see y'all next time right here in the duck car room. We're out. We go on.