Duck Call Room - Justin Martin's First Job Was Working for a Circus

Episode Date: May 30, 2024

Uncle Si gets filled in on Disney World details now that John-David is back from his trip and the souvenirs he brought home remind Martin of his childhood contribution to the local circus. While Si doesn’t approve of roller coasters, he does approve of fast cars and faster airplanes. Godwin and Si give some fatherly advice to a new dad of a little girl from their own experiences being girl dads. The boys all agree that Willie is the worst person to fly with of all time and Si makes his views clear about the eating of reptiles.  - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the duck call room, ladies and gentlemen. Johnny D's back fresh from a Disney trip. So I'm just going to let him talk. I'm like a child still. He's still a kid at heart. Si, when was last time you went to Disney World? You don't have your microphone on. He ain't even put his headphone off.

Si, he's ready to run from that lightsaber. I'm still in rest mode. You still in rest mode? Yeah, I'm still in rest. Holiday weekend got you, huh? I haven't rested in years, it feels like. I need to go on a vacation. Yeah.

Kyle used to work here and goes, Johnny D. I need a vacation from my vacation. And I feel that. But we had a good time. I got this T-shirt with size face on it somehow. Yeah. Yeah. We've been sent that T-shirt several times saying it's sold in Disney.

And is there anything we want to do about it? So we asked the proper questions to the attorneys. And they said, take on Disney and we're like yeah no it's fine we'll look at it as free advertising and move on sigh you are part of not only duck dynasty but also part of pirates of the caribbean pirates of the caribbean yeah how about that and they really did some work to willie's beard to make it all one color and size is all one link actually no it's not no size is perfect like it's split half and half and short if you were ever wondering if sye was this was the

inspiration the different size beard on each side should confirm it yeah it's like you had a lightsaber and you got part of it cut off you should feel all he got it too close to his light saber man i used to make those for the bay rack shrine circus before that thing come to town i used to put them things together wait what no i mean they weren't that but they were that they had lightsabers at the circus i mean you pushed a button there's like a flashlight that lit up a tube but, you know, I was part of the labor that helped put all that together for the circus. That is a strange job.

Well, my grandfather's a Shriner. There is. And so they volunteered to put all the, they would get the toys to save money at the Shriner's circus when they're raising money for kids. They would get the toys on pallets and pieces and somebody had to assemble them to sell at the circus. Well, that was fun.

You were the assembly, man. Fun. As a kid, you had to throw a truck. put together toys and you didn't get to play with them that wasn't fun that is the opposite i bet you did play well i mean a little one time take that thing go boom well you did until it became a noise it's just like a duck call though it it was fun until it became a job you know then after about a hundred of them you're like okay this sucks yeah but it was always but it's always a fish fry and as a little kid that shopped in a husky department like i was cool

with it you know oh yeah you had to make the noise See, but now you can go to Disney World and pay way too much money And it just makes the noise for you How much was it? One of them I don't need to know how much you spend on all of them I'm three of them Yeah

I brought the other ones if you want to play later Because they were so much money I feel like I have to take them everywhere I go But they're also breakable They're like yeah you can't like You can't swing at each other with them This is like a light bulb It looks like an LED bulb

Yeah, watch Yeah, they were 250 bucks a piece. Can I put that like on my back of my boat and use it as a running light? You could. I mean, it looks like. You could. You might need a different color. And then be making that noise running down the lake?

Yeah, right. I walk through the Atlanta airport with three lightsabers in tow. What all colors did they come? It's amazing you got them home without breaking. Are there just two colors of lightsabers? I ask because I don't know. There's four. Oh, okay.

This one's Benz's. Don't tell him I took it. He's a bad guy. What? Oh, is red mean bad? Yeah, red means bad. Okay. I was going to do a red one, but then when my son did, I felt like we were going to get judged. But at Disney, go ahead and try and judge me.

There's some strange folks at Disney. So it makes a different noise? Yeah, I guess so. I guess I just noticed that for the first time. Anyway, if anybody wants to fight, I'll be sitting here with both them. Well, there's another lightsaber on the ground. It's purple. It's Carter's.

Purple. But we're ready. What is purple? The like in between, like can be good or bad? Oh, they're mostly good, guys. Oh, I was wondering. Just red or bad guys. Oh, okay.

You know that's not going to last long, Jerry. These? Oh, no, these are doomed. No, they're going to put. Yeah, they're doomed. My children, I'm like, you cannot fight with them. And they're like, but that's why we got them. I'm like, this is a strange phenomenon that we found this out afterwards.

Good news is you got Halloween knocked out. They, they, very nice, though. I feel these things, sir. That's a real life. You feel like you. We're going to think of it's heavy. That's what I'm saying. You can do some damage with that.

What was it runoff of? Is it rechargeable? AAA batteries. Oh, really? Triple A's. You thought it was the force? That's what my... The whole time he thought it was the force and it's just triple A's.

Tell you something right now. Whelan and Jackson would have that thing in pieces by noon. Oh, yeah. I thought them for my kids and they haven't been allowed to touch them yet. Joe Hina would disassemble them. Oh, no. That was one of Scotts deal. She takes, I don't know how many radio she just parked her room.

Click, pomp, look over there. You'd have a sucker broke down. Oh, I mean, 100 pieces. Yeah. Just disassembled. I said, what do you do it? I'm waiting for these to brag. She said, I want to know how it worked.

Yeah. There you go, a little engineer. And now she's a chef, kind of. She is. She puts all kinds of dresses and everything else on deer mounts. She can cook better. I mean, homemade food. Everybody at Disney.

No offense, Disney. Your food's still. thinks. Yeah, did you gain any weight? Lost three pounds. Yeah. Lost three pounds. I lost, well, you know, Carter's bigger than he used to be, but he still wanted to be in that stroller half the time at Disney, so that was the big fight who could rush back to getting the stroller, and then I was just pushing up. My calves look great.

I've been pushing a stroller with 150 pounds of human in it. I would think it's obvious, though. The Prez gets the stroller. I mean, like. The Prez was living his best life. The Prez. Hey, we did go to the Hall of Pris. president's the most boring ride at Disney. Not to Carter. And he was in heaven. Took pictures with George Washington and Thomas Jefferson. I was afraid, and I'm not

going to say which president, but he's currently in the White House. When his little animatronic started talking, I was like, Carter, you can't boo or any, don't do anything weird. Yeah. And he didn't. That's good. He just sat there and. Because odds are, there were supporters of him around you. So you may, you may have had to, you may have to bust your lightsaber out. Because it's Disney World, so all six people that stopped by the Hall of Presidents. Yeah. I was like, hey, y'all want to ride a roller coaster or go learn about history. Hey, but kudos to having that as an option.

It is pretty. It actually was pretty cool. The only thing I didn't like, they were showing, like, different scenes from our presidents, like, talking. And they had a, oh, W. After 9-11, he's like, and I hear you. And then he said, and we'll all hear you. And they cut off the part, and I leaned over to Carter, I said the next thing he said was,

and the people that knocked these buildings down are going to hear all of us soon. And I was like, USA. But they cut that part off, because I was going to start a USA chant. Because that was one of the coolest. And then he threw that strike, W rules. But they didn't do the, you won't fool me again. Foole me once. Can't fool me again.

Fool me once. Shame on you. Fool me twice. You won't fool me again. Greatest W quote of all time. Hey, fool me once. Can't fool me again. Anyway, yeah, Disney's pretty cool.

I get, you know, we had a good time. Will y'all go back? Not, well, you know. Probably. If this podcast gets another 200,000 subscribers, please like and subscribe, I'm broke. Yeah. That place is expensive.

Oh, yeah, I bet. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means? That means more outside cooking. And y'all know, we love to eat beef around here. That's because of our friends over at Tritels Beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good?

It's so good. Our friend, Sao Robertson would say, buy on the grill. Look, before we got Tritels, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes from. But with Tritales beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Tritales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch.

So they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire,

that's all you need. Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Tritale's beef. I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat.

She isn't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. We went Johanna and Brooke on their senior trip. That's when I had that pull behind camper. We pulled the camper down there and stayed in that campground, got us a golf cart, rode all. It's pretty neat.

Really? It's a funny place. We rode every ride. That's a long ride from here. Yeah, that's a long drive. It's the old ride. I had a flight. Yep.

We rode every ride about 700 times. See, Orlando Airport's still a travesty. Oh. Oh, it's the worst. It's the worst airport in America. Well, and I feel bad because it's people like Allison and my children who have never flown but like twice in their whole life. Yeah. And they got no clue what's going on.

Carter's taking his shoes off. Carter's like, okay, now's an opportune time. to sit down and put my shoes back on in the middle of an aisle, like where people are trying to get out of secure. And it's just a bunch of kids that have no clue. Yeah, that was the airport that forced me to schedule a meeting at DFW for TSA Precheck. Me too. That one right there.

The Orlando Airport. The Orlando airport is full of children and moms and dads who have never flown before. And it's their one time, which is great. Yeah. But you are very in the way, people. They all look like that guy Oh that guy Brittany has laughed so hard at that

She just kept showing it to me She's like did you see this picture I'm like well yeah I follow Johnny Dee So look So this face is not laughter from the ride It's laughter at this guy Because we had a rule Si that our kid if we're riding the roller coaster

You put your hands in the air And my sons were serious about it Everything we did So what's wrong with you people. And then we got with this stranger here who we have affectionately named in our house grumpy Gus. He has fired up to be where he's. Oh yeah. Like if you're going to go to Disney. I know. I feel bad because he was actually trying to get his hands in the hair. He didn't make it. But he just couldn't do it. He didn't make it. He was scared to do it. And he kept grabbing. And I'm

giggling the whole time. And then he's got an eight-year-old and a 10-year-old behind him giggling with their hands in the air. and he wanted to participate. He just couldn't put it off. Couldn't pull the hands in the air off. But why, okay, your hands ain't, why not smile? Because he's scared. Well, then why are you on it?

Oh, no. I don't do things that scare me for fun. I like them roller coasters. I mean, roller coasters are fine. My problem with roller coasters. Well, my problem with them is I don't fit in a lot of them. Like, that bar, Yeah, seat.

When they, well, when they bring the bar day, you know, you got the little attendant that's like, let me lock this and I'm like, hey, big dog. Yeah. Like, hold. You can't push further down. You're listening to board to click and don't click.

I know, I'm like, am I going to be all right? He's sitting there trying to push it down and make it click. You're a whoa, dude. They make it click. And I'm like, all right now. Like, this is, this too much.

Benz did that. Me and Benz were sitting next to each other. You know, he weighs 56 pounds or something like that. Oh, yeah. And he's like, oh, that ain't close enough. and he pulls and I'm like, oh no, and I'm stuck and I'm sucked in. I'm like, I can't. Why did you?

I said, you ever do that again? We're going home. Yeah. And then I rode that ride. That was uncomfortable. Yeah, that's my biggest issue. Like, you know, they got a husky department. Can we, can we get a husky, can we get a husky coaster?

There's a lot of husky people it does. Or maybe body positive if, you know, we're in, we're in 2024. Like, is there a body positive seat? Like, is there a body positive car where maybe we don't have to. to ride two by two. You know, maybe, maybe I can just be there by myself. Someone who just came back from Disney World,

that's going to be a long line. Oh, I know. Yeah. That was mean. Oh, man. You don't do roller coasters? No. Why not?

Because they do not agree with me. Oh, they agree with everybody. Oh, no. I used to be that way. I would not get on a roller coaster to save my life in elementary because my mom put me on Space Mountain when I was five and I rode on the front row and I still scared from that experience. But then like in the eighth grade, I said,

I'm riding everything. Space Mountain's dark. When it gets dark, and they turn the lights off. My kids love that ride. And I, you know. I like, Johanna didn't, that was the first one she got on.

And it was like, she was terrified the whole time. Yeah, now that- He got off that thing and run to the corner and sit down and curled up. I didn't enjoy it. So I remember Disney, we went one time when I was a kid,

never went back. I think because me and my brother didn't. I mean, it's fun, but like Six Flags is too. Yeah. Way closer. Why you have a certain age, Disney's kind of. Yeah, way closer, way cheaper, all the things. You've got thrill seekers and then you've got those that, no.

But I remember day three. You're not a thrill seeker? Oh, I'm not. No, I'm a down, you know, it's like, I'm not adventurous in nothing. So you just talk about drag racing and. Well, well, I just, you, you skied a monster truck. you idiot like you got in it put the you got in it put your foot to the floor this is true we got pictures of that that was a roller coaster ride right yeah no not really

roller coaster way safer than that yeah yeah because at least the roller coaster knows what is doing you didn't know what you were doing in that monster truck I didn't know what you were doing in that monster truck I didn't you know it wasn't no anxiety I get on stupid road coaster there's anxiety big time oh he don't like it slowpile He don't like that. He don't like that. Wait. Well, well, I guess it's going to happen.

I guess it's for me and my son and my wife and Tracea was at. It's a great place. And they talked me into doing one of them stupid rides. The judge roy screamed? I don't know what it was. Is that? I just know it went up real high and then the bottom fell out of there and it went down. Mr. Freeze?

Yeah. And I said, nope. you come up in the saloon and it looks like it's going straight and I was a hold on I mean it literally just my heart went from me to my feet my man said no no there's more life in this my wife was laughing the whole time because she was watching it okay she didn't go did you have your hands in the air no no no my five-year-old daughter did somewhere there's a picture of a kid besides side They're calling him grumpy guys.

That's right. That's right. No, no. And look. And there's fear. Yeah. There's fear on my face. Trust me when I tell you.

Because Christine said, you are as white as a sheet. Oh. And I said, if you just went up to what I went through, you'd be white as a sheet too. I would pay everything I just paid for my whole family of five to go back to Disney World and ride the Tower of Terror just with Sigh one time. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That would be magical.

Sall, let's all go to Disney. Well, let my kids get a little older. I don't want to go about them. This kid's not getting on. That's a good one. Well, that's just a train on railroad tracks. I can handle that, okay? Going through the zoo, huh?

Oh, man. Anything that's got drops and rolls in it? No, sir. That bugger you up when you're flying in a plane, too, when it drops real fast? No, no, that's the crazy thing about it. Okay, I love flying. Look. See?

I don't like flying. That's like I, there was three or four times they tried to get me with the blue angels. Okay, and then, Mattner, had it worked out? I mean, I was on the way to the airport. That would be awesome. Yeah, and then, no, no, then I would, I would do that, but I would probably throw up. But I still, that would, yeah. But my man ain't a thrill seeker.

Well, no. He can't wait to fly with the blue angels. But I'm not getting on a roller curtain. But snow light and the seven dwarves, we got to draw a line somewhere. Well, no, no, because like yesterday. Okay, yesterday I watched Memphis Bell Okay, and

Randy, okay, buyer He bought me a picture, okay, and a piece of the actual metal off of it. The Memphis Bell, and I've got it in my house on the wall. So I watched this movie, okay, and it was all about the Memphis Bell.

What is the Memphis Bell? It's a B-17 bomber. There you go, just to make sure that people... I didn't know this. I would love to ask a historian, how many, how many bombers did we lose? Because we lost 200,000 air crews.

And there was probably, what, 12 people to a crew, the pilot, the co-pilot. It had like seven machine gunners, I think, or maybe more. Okay, then you had the bombers there, I knew yesterday when I was scrolling through the TV, I said, I ain't moved today. Yeah, I went to get on a plane one time, go somewhere.

Me and Jeff, we was going somewhere, and they said the battery was dead. They had to jump it off. Nah. So what do you bring another plane up there beside it and run some wars? I'm out. They bring some serious juice there. Good, Gary. When they say the plane's battery is dead, I'm...

That's what they say. Yeah. But I mean, it's an airplane. It ain't got voltage return. I'll be in the Nissan Armada headed that way. I ain't getting in a plane once they start talking about broken parts. Well, everyone, like if you fly on them, if you fly on them private ones to crank them, they got jump packs on every one of them.

They don't just turn a key. I never enjoyed any of that. Yeah, they come out there with a little junk pack like you'd start your truck with. Yeah. We got on one where to climb on the wing to get in. No. That's one of them you step in. That dude said, oh, we ain't crashing.

We run out of gas. I'll put this thing down in the pasture. We had a pilot one time. It was like, oh, no, you just stay close to the interstate. I said, why? He said, something happens. You can just land on the interstate. I said, what about the cars?

He goes, they'll stop. Oh, yeah. And I was like, you know what? If I'm going to stop, yeah. Well, no, no, because that's, hey, that's part of the flight pattern. Yeah. Hey, just that. I'm serious.

They does fly thy 20 of down it. This has local pilot, Wayne Peters. That man has done put like three of them down on golf courses. That's what he looks for. He looks for a bar five on a golf course. He'll sit her on down. And he wants to fly with the blue angels, but, you know. A long paraway right there.

Let's go for that. Base Mountain's out. You got to think about that. Okay. There's something and they go, what, mark three? Mark, I give up. You know, that's what? I know they.

I looked it up one time, and I looked it up one time. wait a minute it can't surely that ain't right that's a razor isn't it yeah yeah i've only seen it three blades i have no idea but that's about to be you know you know just think about it a bird's up in my air free you know just you know well there's only one jet capable of mock three i've had them which is by far a lot faster than the 35 miles per hour that space mountain goes because how how fast is it mock three thousand 190 miles i'll fix like 3 000 miles an hour. How do you, how does your body sustain that speed? It don't well. Well, you don't feel good afterwards. That's why they always have physicals checking them out for everything. Because, hey,

you got to think about it. It's pulling like 10 G's. The only way I want 10 G's in my bank account. I don't even understand. Yeah. I'm right. I put it on that. I said, wait a minute, this thing's going over 3,000 miles an hour. Yeah. No. And I said, boy, I said, you got to be a quick I couldn't fly one of them. You got a bit quick. You got a nanosecond to make up your mind. If you want to change the brain, you got it better to it now. It ain't one of them.

Well, let's see, let me think about this. Nope. You don't wish, you don't get to. Don't think about it. I just love that the speed is the limiting factor on why I can't do it. Hold on. Hey, I'll tell you. It wasn't for that, buddy.

I don't think that fast. Okay. I have to. That's 36 miles a minute. it, which would be like over a mile a second. No, over a mile every two seconds. Yeah. Yep.

A blur. I've had one instant where it was kind of like that one time in a car because I figured I was going at least 160 now. Well, hey, I'll let you figure out. A GTO. No, I'm saying I wouldn't do it. At a round speed I'm to like this drum here. Uh-huh.

Okay. And it's got one to one. 120 and then there is about a two-inch gap it went past it oh no it not only went past it okay this thing pegged out look this thing pegged out 120 and i look over there and look at the speedometer it's already climbing up it's fixing to hit 15 uh-huh but my man ain't a thrill seeker yeah oh no no look and then this idiot roller coasters do us you're driving this idiot says uh I shouldn't be doing this. That was 34 miles per hour.

That's all I'm saying. 34's top speed right there. And you're buckled in. Like that bar ain't coming off. Yeah, but I bet you didn't even have your seat bed on. No, it's just a hill. It's for children. No, that's snow white, man.

How scary can snow white be? My five-year-old daughter did it with her hands in the air. I've got to go out of roller coaster with sides. It's my new life. No, no. Who are for young kids, okay? That they can do it. It's all I say, this old man ain't doing it, okay?

But give him a blue angel and he's in. Hey, strapped me in a F-16 and I'll give it a... What I've gathered is, I don't want to be able to walk away from a calamity. No, no, no, look. We're going in a blaze of glory, big dog. That was like when Philip woke me up to tell me, hey, we fixed a crash. What? You know, I said, why did you even bother waking me up, idiot?

Just let me show you. sleep through. That is a great point. crying out loud. Yeah. I said, wait a minute. We're crashing. Don't wait a minute.

I said, wait a minute. Let me get you straight. We're going to pass out because I ain't. The windshield is going to blow out. I said, but then we're going to wake up when we get below 10,000 feet. Okay, just in time to look down and say, whoops, this ain't good. Just let me sleep. Just leave me along and let me sleep through it, doesn't me?

That's the greatest. point you've ever made. I will. My great grandmama. She had cooked us a big bill. On a plane? It's like 10 o'clock everybody, you know.

She said, well, kids, I'm going to bed. And if the good Lord, will then I'll see you in the morning. She just wouldn't sleep, you know. Hey, what a way to go. Just go to sleep. Hey, I'm with you.

Yeah. You just, your comment there is the epitome of common sense. Yeah. Why wake me up at the plane? Well, I wake me up in the witness to crash. I don't need the witness. Let me wake up at the pearly gates. Hey, that's it.

Yeah, because I was nervous on a couple of them rides. A plane going down, I'm going to pee my pants. And I'd rather just. Oh, no, being willing. On one of these little old prop jobs, okay. And we are on a two-hour flight to get where we're going and come back home. Okay, so we're already there. We get on the plane and it's coming back.

Well, the co-pilot has got it on the radar and said, we got to go around it, guys. Oh, it's going to take us a little longer. Well, hey, five hours later, okay? And I mean, we dropped sometimes like 50 feet, maybe 100 feet. Just one of them like this is just boom and my heart's in my throat. Yeah, head hit the ceiling. Yeah, head to hit the ceiling, turning on lights and all this.

Yeah. Been there, buddy. With Willie. Yeah. He's a bad flying partner. No. And he laughed. He laughs the entire time.

Direct quote from Willie on a plane that one time was a little sketchy. Everybody's like, why would you say that? And he's laughing and giggling at you. It's the worst. Oh, that it is. It's a Friday roller coaster right there. Yeah. It'd be as a child.

Yeah, the one that I was on with him, he grabbed like the little mini bar full of liquor. He wouldn't drink it. We were going to speak of a deal. He grabbed the whole thing and he was like, I'm getting drunk on a plane. And I mean, we're just like this sideways the whole time going through this thunderstorm. Like, it's not good. Oh, man.

And then our buddy Kyle was on there going, how's he so calm? I've never been so nervous. I've got to get on the ground and call Irene. Yeah, Kyle was freaking. I mean, I was too on the inside. I tried not to, but Willie was just, he was singing Dirk's Bentley at the top of his lungs. Like, nothing was that. I'm going to play, getting drunk.

I do not. Rock on a plane, boy. And he said, he looked at me, he said, what are we going to do? We're in this thing. That doesn't matter. I mean, that's a good point, but that's just weird. Yeah, don't minimize somebody's fear. That's not nice.

Yeah. Unless it's over the seven doors, then you need to man up and ride it and put your hands out. We be at an event and people will say, be safe going home. And it's like, that's in the pilot's hands. I ain't much talking to about it. Yeah. I'm going to get my seat belt and hope. Hopefully nobody wakes me up if it's going down.

Don't bother waking me up. Don't wake him up. Just keep me ignorant. So, Cy, obviously, doesn't want to go on a roller coaster. That's fine. He didn't go to Disney. My man. He was at Disney.

He was at Disney standing in those lines, doing the things. To ride by himself, too. And to just be fear-stricken. I don't understand. Well, you got to face your fears. So my daughter. So my daughter, first part, Animal Kingdom, we go, my sons are like, biggest roller coaster there. We're doing it first thing.

There's not a line yet. We just open. I'm like, let's do it. She's never ridden roller coaster because she's never been tall enough. So she's like, let's go. We do it once. I'm like, is everybody good? And she's like, yeah, let's do it again.

I want to sit with you. I'm like, let's go, Lottie. We get to the hill. We're going up the hill. This little girl looks at me in the eyes and says, Dad, I actually don't want to do this again. I said, we ain't got no chance. choice now home girl they do hold on and so then we had to break her of the fears we had to ride a few rides that she didn't want to do she's also five yeah yeah and so we put our hands in the by the end

hands in the air screaming but you know it takes a few days yeah i feel like at his age he should be hands in the air though i judge people who eat disney food and don't put their hands on or just not there like go anywhere else go do anything else yeah other than that like that's what is confusing to me like I just don't I don't know the rules I mean I don't like basket weaving I'm not gonna go take a seminar on it for my vacation like you know I say I don't like it I don't really know it's just kind of a weird you wouldn't like it yeah it's not it's not for you yeah but it just I don't know it's a bizarre set of circumstance that always tick of me that's one of the electives you can take in college basket weaving basket weaving that must have been way back to 1900 well I'm saying hey all I know is

they tell me, you know, well, I had to take an elective. And I said, well, what was your choices? And they said, basket weaving, ballroom dancing. I said, wait a minute, this is for, uh, for, to help you graduate? And they said, oh, yeah, you got to take it. Oh, got to have it. Oh, you think P.E was for. I took music appreciation.

Now, I can see that. What a waste of time. No, we're not really. I took our appreciation. For me it was. Yeah. For me, it was. But it was like the least offensive of all the.

ones that they were to me. I was like, all right, whatever. And then when you do what, your thesis, you have to write something? Not on that one. You just had to pass a test. You just had to know what they were.

Mozart? Yeah. I took art appreciation twice. Yeah, see, I stayed away from art because I knew I didn't want to know about that. I got a lot of art knowledge in my head that's now gone because I don't remember any of it. Yeah, I don't either.

The cool thing about the music is like the band director taught it. So he counted your concerts as going to the football games and watching the halftime shows. It's like I went to ULM's home football games, watch halftime shows, wrote down the songs they played, and that counted as your thing. Was it Dr. White? I don't even remember who he was. Maybe. Has he been there a while?

I don't know. This was tried 2003, 2004. Man, it's been a 20, oh. Good grief. I've been 20 years since I've been in college. Holy! Holy! Wow.

Wow. him in here, good grief. Wow. I can't believe it's been 20 years since I've been in college. Holy cow. I was fixing to say, an old man once told me,

he was like 65 as I was 25. And he said, Robert, I said, hey, don't blink. You'll wake up and you'll be my age and literally. No wonder I'm the grumpy guy on the cold of a sad. Yeah, it's been 20 years

since I've been in college. It goes faster than you think. Wow. Hey, the second time my boys drug me on Space Mountain, I got off that thing. I was like, thank God that's over. And I was like, oh, what did I just say? And I was like, oh, I'm 35 now. Yeah, I'm like, I don't want to do that again.

One was plenty and two was too much. Yeah. I was, I was sitting there holding on real tight yelling hands in the air because my kids couldn't see me. I was like, get your hands up. I was like, get this thing over with. I think, I don't like being in the dark. That thing goes almost, it goes up to the ceiling. in almost.

It beats me. It's dark. How would you know? In the dark, you don't know. Jody D. The one in there with his phone on in the flashlight. Trying to see what they're at. Man, that second one of that, I was like,

what are you doing? Checking to make sure they got the hands in there. Yeah. Yeah, I just need to make sure my kids are doing what I told us. That's right. But I was not. No, I'm not looking at the sides to make sure this is okay. I was holding on tight.

I fear of the dark. That's a real one. Yeah. That's a. I'm not a. of the dark. I'm afraid of going 35 miles per hour and having no control over myself in the dark in a convertible. Because I'm tall too. I touched the roof of that thing. In the little tunnel on the way up. I was like, hands in there. I put my hands in there. My fingers touched the roof. I said, oh, no. I said, y'all put y'all's hands in there. I'm sitting still. I got a real safety issue. Yeah. I hope you're record. That's when you go up like, yeah. I'm going to have knuckle. All my friends will call me knuckles when I get home. they're gone

although hey listen to this I love it JD put this there where's JD OSHA recordable he hanging on

to the roof so why we're there my sister's sending me pictures because that Giannis Obabalupo I don't know how to say his last name

even if I tried he was there and I look up and all of a sudden he's at the same restaurant as me and I was like good night

Who is that basketball player He plays basketball for the bucks. Yeah. He is 6 foot 11. Wow. That has to be a safety hazard being 6 foot 11 and being on a... Oh yeah, he ain't riding nothing.

He was. Really? Yeah, his hands were not in the air. No, he probably had a helmet on. I mean, I would have. But I did meet a dude from Amarillo. He came up to me while I was taking pictures Giannis. He was like, hey, man, I love the duck call room.

And I said, I just got a fan before Giannis did, although there were millions of people following him. Hey, man. He's from Amarillo. He has a truck stop over there. It's got good barbecue. You should go check it out. I don't remember the name of it.

Good barbecue. There's good barbecue at a truck stop in Amarillo. Go eat there. Hey, love it. No. Amarillo about morning. Jacob Wheeler was there. I knew too many people at Disney at one time.

I met a preacher from Iowa when we got off Soren. He was there. He said, thanks for all you do. And I was like, dude, you're the one doing stuff. I just tell silly stories with Sa. And bring lightsabers to a podcast. That's it, man. Lightsabers.

Oh, my God. You should go get a lightsaber. though. No, not for $2.50 a pop. I head down to J-Mart and get one for about $7.99. It's not the same. No, there's a guy that tells you the story. You feel like you're part of the world.

Disney does do something. For all of Disney's faults and flaws, which there are plenty, and this is not the podcast to discuss that, boy, do they do a few things right. And they can put a smile on my side. So is there a character? The kids were the most fired up to see. I know your picture with Chewbacca was.

a big deal for you. Well, they weren't. You're wearing a shirt. I push my kids out of line. You go in a tree? Of life. Big tree? No, that thing's got the weird bugs inside of it.

My kids are out of it. Uh-uh. Them bugs. You're not a bug, man. They spray you with bug spray. Uh-uh. For real? Well, it's, it's just missed, really.

I met you. And then they feel like. Him and his buddy. My kids were also in that picture, but... You cropped them out? Well, they were in a different one. I had to get my own first. Oh, there you.

That's the only, we were just literally there to see how many rides we could ride. So that's what we did. So sister didn't, like, go run down to Anna and Elsa and all that stuff. She wouldn't talk to them. Really? She is more afraid of meeting the princesses she watches every day than the Tower of Terror. I'm raising a psychopath. She would look at them and wouldn't talk to them like, you want to go ride the Tower of Terror?

She's like, yes. Okay. Well, good. A little terror. So, I don't like that. She's got two brothers. She punches them. Yeah, don't talk to strangers.

That's fun. She doesn't talk to strangers, even though it's Anna and Elsa. Yeah. Yeah, every picture of her with a princess, Allison's in between them. She's like, no. But then you put her on a roller coaster and she's having the time of her live. I'm like, surely you should be. I guess with y'all family five, one of you was always the odd person out.

Yeah, that's why I got the picture with grumpy guys. It was often me. I was just riding by myself meeting strangers. And you couldn't have been sat next to another larger human being to be fit like side by I said. You're not little. No, I'm. You're not as big as you once were, but you're not little. I'm still a big guy no matter, no matter the weight.

Gus, not little guy. Y'all filled that seat up. Yeah. Oh, we were touching. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Y'all's legs, like y'all's knees were stuck together kind of way.

He said something. I said, dude, we're wearing this together for the next two, three minutes. It's just put a smile. That's on the middle armrest. You're on top or bottom. Yeah, and I couldn't get a smile And I'm loud on roller coasters No

I'm screaming, I'm yelling I'm trying to make sure my kids are having fun I'm having fun yelling get your hands in the air And he did try I wish he could have done it But as soon as we started going He went like me on a roof

Four points of contact I was like bro You drive through your neighborhood Four points of contact Hands all feet on We ain't falling off his roof, big dog. Oh, it is a good time, though. Well, John, there's been a minute since we've been in that inbox.

You want to jump in there? Yeah, sure. Do what we got? Aaron from Michigan emails in. And I think this is a decent one for all of us to answer. Martin, you don't have any daughters yet. Praise God. I do.

I got a four-legged one. She's female. All right, well, you can chime in here. He's 26, a youth pastor and about to be a. new dad. They're expecting their daughter in September. Would love some advice for new dads on raising a daughter. Oh, yeah, that is Yostapark.

She's going to raise you. That is fantastic. Girls are different to boys. I like that. I like it. That's what she's going to do. She's going to have you wrapped around her little finger. Yeah.

You're going to find out, you know, hey, her little finger. that's where she's going to have you wrapped around. Okay. This is, hey, trust me when I tell you. I don't know if he has boys or not. I think he,

I think this is his first one. But yeah, you're in trouble. Oh, that's good. Now, you ain't in trouble. No, you're in trouble.

You're in trouble. You're in time of your life. It is. It's going to be special. Because you'll do things that people will say they won't do it. But, hey, whenever you get a dollar, hey, yeah,

you're going to be at a tea party. Oh. Yeah, well, I did do that with my nieces. There's pictures of me with gaudy amounts of cheap kids makeup on my face. I'm like, yeah, I don't care, whatever. I'll be your paintbrush. I'll be your easel. Go ahead.

Doesn't matter to me. The only weird thing is, which it'll be a long time is when she starts dating. Uh-uh. That's not a lot. Yeah, that's a rough time for dad. Is it? Oh, no, that's a rough time. You just tell them, if you make her cry, I make you cry.

That's just what you tell them. Well, because I'm at the stage. of I just, I got so tired of holding her in line, Allison said, one day you won't be able to. I was like, get back up here and let me hold you. Oh. And I carried that girl around Disney World for, I mean, she's the reason I lost weight at Disney World

because I was working out, just picking her up. And it was awesome. And me and her road rides, and it was amazing. It's special. Yep, but girls rule. It'll be fine. It'll be fine. Don't be scared at all. No.

That's why I said you're going to have the time of your life. No. You could. It's going to be a little scary. Yeah, and you could be having twins. Yeah. My sister's got twin girls. Double-in' kids.

Yeah. Well, twin boys are fun right now because they, you know. Your kids are wild. Well, no, no. Every time I see videos of Martin's kids are just outside of the age right now. Oh, man. Your boys are at the age now where they're really just fun to watch and be with. Yeah, except I got one that's extremely possessive.

Hey? And. I got three. Well, I. They're going to start hitting each other. Oh. He's going to all these changes. I'm like, buddy.

And problem is it's a little one. It's whaling. I'm like, when Jackson decides to fight back, big dog, not going to be good. He's going to hurt you. Like, big meat going to hurt you once you rattle his cage. And he's the biggest softy there is right now. But I mean...

Yeah, but it'll come a day. Yeah, I get on to his brother and he starts crying. I'm like, now and we gotta we gotta get you a little bit tougher than that like this ain't gonna work but yeah no it's hey them first ones there you go man i'm i'm one and two so first and second well everything everything okay there ain't a book nowhere for parroted nah they're everywhere and nowhere at the same time there's a bunch of them out hey do the best you can as you go figure it out get in get in the weeds and figure it out do the best you can make sure they don't hurt themselves and other than that though it is just yeah keep

That's the rule number one. Yeah, the weirdest thing, I'm sure y'all went through that, like the eating is just. Oh, they're all different too. Oh, today they'll eat it tomorrow. They throw it on the floor. The next day they find it on the floor, pick it up and eat it. And it's like, what the heck, man? Like, why can't you just like?

That's some kind of consistency? Like, I mean, it's unbelievable. And it just drives me up the wall. I'm like, you little pun. I'm like, oh, I hit a home run. Y'all like all three of these things. They're like, nope. No, big dog, we're good.

I'll just tell them, don't eat it. Don't you eat that. Don't you dare put that in your mouth. Don't. My middle one would be like, okay. I don't ever eat. Reverse psychology. Yeah, it is.

Oh, bad. Yeah, kids eating's bizarre. Yeah. It doesn't make any sense. Yeah, it's. Because my oldest, he'll eat almost anything, but he'll tell you. And he'll try it. Yeah.

My youngest, she'll have a salad. tonight and be like, hmm, that's great. I'm like, you're weird. That middle child of mine, he will not. He's like chicken nuggets. Get that out of here. I'm like, what? He will only eat fish.

That's one of the boys. Gohan, I love mac and cheese. Craft mac and cheese. She'd make it herself. Carter can do that. We cap that. We put them in another tax bracket while she was growing up. See, the boys won't touch mac and cheese.

That's what's wild. They're like, you know, get that trash out of here. Now mashed potatoes, though, they smash. Me too. Oh, I'm talking about mashed potatoes, they smash. And rice. They love rice. Hold on.

I do have to, since I've bashed Disney food, and now we're talking about our kids and food so much. So, here is my son's review of Disney's fish. His fish is terrible. Papa, your fish is amazing. He was like, oh, Disney fish. And we ordered it for him. He spit it out.

He's like, ugh. And I was like, he said, tell Papa, I need some of his fish. I said, well, What kind of fish was? Like Cap and D's? No. Like the beer butter? It was something weird in the Caribbean.

It doesn't belong in food. I got you. It was bizarre. It wasn't crappy. But the fish in England, that was actually pretty good. Anyway, Gray from Asheville, North Carolina. This is an interesting question that I don't know has ever been proposed to you, So we all know how you feel about live snakes.

No. No. But have you ever eaten a snake? No, no. They tell me, okay. But, you know, you talk about kids, there's just one minute they'll leave it, next minute they won't. If I look at something and don't know the way it looks, I'm not going to eat it. But have you ever eaten a snake?

No. They say rattlesnake is really good. I just can't, I wouldn't be able to, knowing me, I would not be able to put it in my mouth and try it. It tastes like an alligator. Yeah. No, well, then I wouldn't eat. Does it? you've eaten snake

I've had people say well dog you should have got a young one or they didn't cook it right hey they ain't nothing you can do to an alligator while I'll eat it and enjoy it now if you got it where you just got it and I cleaned it fresh oh I've had that

it's tender and not chewy it's good it's got a strong flavor this I had didn't they didn't know how to cook soon as I tasted it it's whoa no good Because that I had was pretty tasty. I don't like... But it's not like you get anywhere else.

Alligator and gar is the same thing. Now, alligators better than gar, but alligator's average at best. It's just chewy chicken. It ain't no good. Yeah. I'm not much. I'm trying to think, like, in the reptile world, I've tried a few of them. And I'm not a...

It's not a reptile eater. I don't... I wouldn't want to eat anything that slithers around on it. They've been here too long. Yeah. Yeah, they've been here too long. Like, if they were really good to eat, they'd got snuffed out a long time ago.

Or they'd have been bread like chickens. Yeah, yeah, we'd have found a way to farm them. Even though we have alligators, but that's just for their house. Everybody I've talked to said, it's because a boot. It's not good. I mean, I've had it. It's not.

I just, it's all right. You can eat it. It's just not like. Oh, if I'm starving it. There were several things on the table. That ain't the first thing you're going to pick it. Yeah, you're just like, why? Like, there's a snake and there's chicken and there's port,

and you're like, you know what, that chicken and that pig is significantly greater. But I did have, you know, what, last summer we, I had Jackson. That's weird. Had him in my arms whenever we had the garter snake. It lives by my garden, and I called him and played with him and let the boys touch him. Well, we were at the park the other morning, and I was like, Jackson took off just through the woods. I was like, oh boy, here we go.

That's a Martin for you. So I went with him and I said, you know, I was just looking around. He was kind of wide open. I said, boy, this be a good place finding a snake right here. Like, I'm just looking around. Yeah. And I ain't looked for five seconds and there's a big old chicken snake on the ground. And about the time I saw it, Jackson saw it.

And buddy, bee line straight forward. And I said, son, this is not how you want to learn this lesson. That snake right there will bite you if you get over there and try. to mess with him. And so I grabbed him up and the whole time he's just trying to get out of my arms to get down there to him. And I finally got the thing to call up and like strike at my shoe. And he was like, oh, okay.

Yeah, that's what those. Okay. Okay. I see what we're doing here. But I was trying to like hold him and show him like, you ain't there yet. We'll play with him later. Yeah, you don't want to mess with this one. But you ain't there yet.

Our parenting styles are so different. I'd have just pushed my kid towards a snake and take off running. I went over there and got him all fired up Was running my foot back and forth in front I couldn't hardly make him bite me though And then I finally got him I finally like put a little pressure on him And that really upset him

And then he bit at my foot And I was like, here you go I would have just yelled scatter And just hoped all my kids made it out alive Come this one? No, man you got to teach him respect for that stuff Like he's gonna be Yeah

He's gonna be around them No you don't want no in inane fear of them like that's a miserable way to go through life like you can avoid roller coaster snakes are there like roller coaster in theme part snakes everywhere you look but one brings a smile to everyone but one guy's face and yeah wait two guys clay the other day look he took that rival oh i was a bag and shook it hopped it there like this and look i don't even think that When he shook it, he did. I fist, and I was turning,

because if he would have rub me with it, I would have knocked him out. Clay was ready to make your spot permanently, Johnny De. He brought pictures. He brought, like, crinkets and stuff to put around. He even brought me some pickled pawpoles. You liked it so much you left it here? Well, no, no.

He wanted you to try it with him. No, that's pickles his mama makes out of cucumbers. I had it. Cucumbers that he raised. Yeah, the pawpaw is just. I thought he put Pawpaw because, hey. It's just Pawpaw's recipe. Okay.

Does he still have that awesome hair? Oh, of course. Of course. That's why I said. I said we had to find somebody with hair as good as yours to be in here for it. He's got better hair than me. Oh, babe. He brought everybody a gift but me.

Where's mine? The guy, well, you weren't here. I'm saying the ones that he brought Phillips alligator on a board, brought size and pig, he didn't bring me nothing. Thanks, Clay. Yeah, I talked to him after. He said he was going to bring me a Chili's gift card.

I said, why, that plays trash. I just don't. Hey, choose another one. Chilis and it was good. Yeah. Well, he said he had heard me say that Chili's was trash on here. I don't even remember it. But it is a fact.

It is trash. It's up there with Applebee's. It's right there with Disney. I mean, it's all the same food. Yeah, it's a landlock cruise ship. Okay. Like, I mean, that's all those places are, like landlock cruise ships. They're terrible.

There's some ladies screaming on Survivor about Applebee's, and I could do a whole segment on that, but I'm just going to do a Bible version. Yeah, go ahead. She goes to Applebee's every week. I'm like, oh. For karaoke? Surely it's not for the Bourbon Street State. Psalm 1611,

You make me known to the path of life. You will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand. You can have a lot of fun at Disney. You can have a lot of fun on this earth. And I'm thankful for Memorial Day and all the people that fought for us to have fun in this room and have a joyful life.

But none of that can compare to the joy that you can have and being in the presence of Jesus Christ. Remember that if you don't remember anything. He's greater than everything. Even seven dwarves. And in Jesus, you will have a smile on your face even if you're grumpy guys. And lightsabers.

That is. Wow. True. Unreal. All right. We'll see y'all next time right here in the duck car room. We're out.