Duck Call Room - Justin Martin's Massive Mistake Caused His Life to Flash Before His Eyes

Episode Date: December 17, 2024

Martin’s piloting of a sea vessel nearly spells doom for him and his buddies, and Uncle Si gives the keys to the holiday season to his wife because he’s totally worn out! John-David gets excited about their new idea to make George Foreman-style money with a kitchen appliance, and Godwin ponders what gift to give his wife for Christmas this year. The boys are flabbergasted by the way women love Target superstores and by their own Spotify Wrapped results.  - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the Duck Call Room, ladies and gentlemen. Happy holidays. It is the holiday season. That's a holiday. Already. You can spend your time anywhere, so thank you for spending it with us this holiday. I'll be home for Christmas. You could have been in the world for you hear with me.

Yeah. You're usher sang it. Hard to say. Not that. We all in the Christmas spirit around here, and we still got a couple of weeks to go before we get there. That's it. No, man.

It's fun, fresh off of a trip down to the Florida Keys for a few days during our closed duck season. So I'm rested. I heard you had a throttle manipulation problem. So I had a problem. I did. Yeah. And fairness, so we rented a boat without a captain because I went with a bunch of professional fishermen. I'm all for paying people to do what they do, but, you know, they're like, well, we're fishermen.

We'll figure this out. boat needs a good captain yeah so a big big bay boat yeah a 25 foot center console yeah um a big one with like a you know 250 yamaha on the back of it or something but we were so we all took turns running the boat whatever why everybody fish because you know the ocean got a lot current in it so it's a big ocean it is a big ocean and didn't have a troller motor didn't have a troller motor no no troll of motor. So we would all, everybody fish,

take turns. Well, at some point, so the throttle on these things are different than the throttle on a freshwater boat. Freshwater is like direct drive or something like that. That's how the throttle works.

But anyway, you push it, stuff happens. Like, you know what's happening when you push the throttle. Well, you got to give it, go on and give it.

Yeah. This thing has some kind of digital throttle. So at some point, every one of us almost through every other person out of the boat. So we're talking about the best bass anglers in the world. Jacob Wheeler, Dustin Connell, Mark Daniels, Adrian Avena, and me.

Now here's the difference. They'd let me drive while they fished while we were up there doing what bass fishermen do. We were flipping boat docks in the keys. They got a whole ocean. And we're running around the keys flipping boat docks. Different. A set of characters there.

That'd be chunking at something. But I tell you this. I think that's because nobody. down there fishes that kind of stuff so we we were smashing we were catching more 11 inch mangrove snapper than we know what to do with so which they got to be 10 inches to be legal or whatever we were catching we're like you got to be 10 inches but these were like 11 and 12 inches so we were knocking the sides off of them and eating fish and all the thing they're good so I'm running it though and I'm looking and everything's fine because I've watched them I've watched their mistakes right

like I'm like oh yeah I ain't gonna do yeah I ain't gonna do what they get out of the way let me show you but i ain't gonna do what they did so we're up around a big barge with a trackhoe on it like it's been dredging i guess or something large has a track hoe on it mm-hmm and that thing's loaded with fish buddy i'm talking about loaded so they're all fired up so i'm like y'all go catch them whatever it don't matter i'll drive the boat so i'm driving we we start drifting towards it and and i put it in reverse which is fine i just i eased it into reverse and we're just kind of backing up Well, you know, there's a bunch stuff around us. So I turned my head, but I still got my hand on the throttle.

Oh, boy. So when I turn my head to look behind us, unbeknownst to me, I was going down on the throttle, too, not even paying attention. Well, that thing rocks back. So what are you doing when it rocks back? Rock forward. You try to find neutral real quick. Well, neutral is nowhere to be had on this thing, not quickly. It goes, it fires straight past it.

So now I'm going forward at full throttle towards the barge. That's not a good thing. But ain't a good thing. And I'm talking about we're close enough we're flipping said barge. Like we're not casting to the barge. We're doing this. And I see DC come flying off the front of the boat back into the boat. Which unbeknownst to me, he said, if you hadn't thrown him forward, I was going to end up in the water.

You know, he said, but you rocked me forward and then you brought me back when you went and forward. So then I'm grabbing the forward throttle and coming back again, well, it blows straight past neutral again. And so now we're full speed reverse. That's better than forward. And then finally, I was like, where is neutral? Found neutral on stop. I said, y'all drive this thing. I'm done. But I legit, almost wrecked. I can picture that. Oh, buddy, it was terrible. You almost wrecked a 25-foot boat that we didn't own into a barge into a large metal barge no they kept biting

them saltwater fish are dumb I turned up to bottom all the way around that thing too doing all that mess and they still kept biting but I said y'all drive this thing man I'm not not up here around stuff I'm out I'm out and they were all laying in the floor like what in the world just happened I was like

they didn't want to drive either yeah I was trying to figure out the same thing of what just happened oh I mean as a freshwater guy neutral On all of our stuff, neutral stops. Like, you have to intentionally go out of neutral. Not on this thing. It's like a little.

This thing goes forward and back. Oh, yeah. When you're in a panic, for sure. After that, I was like, all right, now y'all go, let me figure, let me find what this is supposed to feel like. And I did, and, you know, I still drove a little bit more. But, buddy, I almost wrecked a boat onto a barge with four of my dearest friends. How far were you from shore? Oh, we're right by the bank.

That's good. I mean, we could have stood up where we were fishing. It would have just, we didn't own the boat. It would have been a bad deal. Yeah. But you would have been able to swim to shore. Oh, we could have walked to the marina. The marina was just right up there.

Like, I mean, it wouldn't. All good accidents happened right by the marina. Yeah, but we were dangerously close to having new structure to fish in the Florida Keys. It was a 25-foot center console boat with a 300 on it. I mean, it was an old-fashioned. Toughy. I was scared, man. I don't get scared on the water, but I was like, I knew at that moment things have gone awry. I was like, this is not a good look. But we all laughed about it. We all got a couple new bruises from it. You know, it's fine.

From getting slung around a boat like that. Gracious. Yeah. Folks, if you're a freshwater guy, you go saltwater fishing with a digital throttle. It's different. Spend an hour learning the throttle before you do anything. Yeah. But that they legit. I mean, I'm not justifying my problem.

I'm just saying everybody did that at some point. Mine was just the only time. There was blue ocean in front of us every other time. Somebody did it. Like you to just, we almost fell in a wall. There was a large in front of you. Yeah,

there was a big, large metal bar. Stop him. Who would have, who would have won the battle between that and a 25 foot fiberglass center console. How do boats like that even float? I don't know, but it would have stopped. us.

How do you make a track hole float? It was floating. You're going on that barge. Yeah, it was floating. We be a catfish on the Mississippi River, and a barge will be coming towards it. It'll be seven wide and seven deep. Five acres of barge.

How in the world? Floating and pushing. Yeah. And I passed, one passed us, it had like 12 D-9s on the front of it, bulldozers. And then the back was like living quarters, like apartments stood it. I didn't know them numbers on the side of the barge was to let you know how much boat was under the water. I didn't need it. Oh, yeah.

They got like a measure and rulers on the side of it. Yeah. So like if it's it, if you look and you see it's, it seems low and it's at 12, that means there's 12 foot of boat up under the water. Mm-hmm. And then when they unload, it'll rise up and it'll be like on one or two and you can. Full of beans or full of corn or full of rice. Rock, gravel, concrete, all the things. Hunter?

Oh, yeah. Hold on. Hunter's, I have to check on Hunter. Huckin on bone over. Hunter's literally choked up about the story and cannot stop coffee. Are you okay? Water is coming out of his eyes. I'm fine.

The thought of losing us was, oh, drowning. Yeah, we were real close to that. Hunter, have you ever had a bottle of water before? Is this your first one? Okay. Oh, don't make them laugh. Got a drinking, bro. I legitimately got worried for Hunter's safety there for a minute.

Oh, man, a lot. But yeah, that was that was it, man. The Florida Keys, man, I like that place. I like that. I got questions. That part of the world, what? You were there for like... Three days.

Was it even that? It felt like 20 minutes. Yeah, it's three days. Seems like a lot of work to get somewhere to only stay there for 20 minutes. Well, so we generally take a trip during the winter, that whole crew, but it's always during duck season. All them chickens are down there.

A lot of chickens. They do have a bunch of chickens. We've seen a chickens in a Kentucky fried chicken parking lot. He was walking around, Paula said, does he know? Key West got chickens, free-range chickens. Yeah. That's about the boat underwater. Yeah.

That's like our carriers. Yeah. That's a city in itself. 5,000 people is what's on that carrier. What? Yeah. Living up under that. Yeah.

Living under. water. Yeah, most of them underwater. Yeah, most of them underwater. All your sleeping compartments, all that. Dead, not. Yeah, that's wild, man. But now, we did a little quick trip down to Key West, because we had all been there before, so it wasn't like go down there and explore, and we all knew kind of what we were getting into and knew all the stuff we wanted to do and all the things. So it was fun. We got to take part in the Key West Christmas Parade. Is that anything like the Baccomville Christmas Parade?

I would just fix that. I came to town. and hey i've never seen that many cars and that many people in westmond row did you catch you some free rolls of toilet paper uh no you got hung up i got what was that oh they had some pretty deer mount buddy of mine was sending me pictures of some deer mounts they was on them float oh so they decorated it with real deer that's that real deer i mean oh dear all right look springtime is here it's warming up you know what that means that means more outside cook and and y'all know we love to eat beef around here and that's what because of our friends over at tritels beef makes such a good product baby ain't it good it's so good it's our friend sall

robinson would say buy on the grill look before we got tritels getting ready for a cookout man somebody had to run the grocery store do all the things grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day and you never really know where that beef come to him but with tritels beef if we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Triedales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch, so they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch

and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I'll tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season,

go check out Triedails Beef. I know in size case, Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat. She isn't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak.

Weren't you the... Oh, I was. I was Grand Puba one time. Of the Baccomville Redneck Christmas Parade? Well, I cannot think of a better representative than you. Well, hey, there you go. There you go. But, hey, your weekend was wild, huh?

Huh? You sent me a picture. I did do a thing. Of something that I thought only existed in dreams. Uh-oh. No, it exists in the real world. Uh-oh. You have to go to Shreveport and drive on that interstate, which you, that is a life or death situation right there.

All that construction. I hauled my boat through there Did you really? I got off of that thing quick How was there enough room And a couple of them bottlenecks Because we flew out of Shreveport Oh my word

It was close Shreveport Louisiana's interstate Has been a travesty for years Oh yeah Now they're fixing it Attempting to fix it So what they've done is made it all One lane and put walls up

Where if you fart You're gonna scratch your car all up They ain't a lie there It is so nerve-wracking. It's tight. But in Shreport's defense, I say a lot of foul things about Shreveport. They say a lot about us, too. Doesn't matter.

We're right there wrong. My wife's from there. It's a weird place. But we went to this Christmas light thing, and it was cool. They had snow tubing, but it was like on this plastic thing. That was a lot of fun. Then there was lights, and I was like, this is a neat thing. The kids like us, my wife's birthday.

We're all having fun. And then they had this food truck area, and I was like, all right. And there was one called corn dogs, the thing it was Queens corn dogs. Amen, buddy. And the kids all wanted a corn dog. And I was like, I got you. And I walk up. Who doesn't?

Who, by the way, who doesn't want a corn dog? Yeah. Well, I didn't after I saw what else they had. And mustard. What else they had? What else they have? Mix it up together. There is a sign on this food truck that says deep fried.

fried little Debbie Christmas tree cakes. Wow. Deep fried. Underneath it, it said everything's better on a stick. And I said, So they put a little Debbie's Christmas tree on a handle. Yeah. I haven't been saying it for years.

I've been saying it. And so I said, well, I guess we're going to have to go for this. Oh, yeah. Well, that was desert. You could have a corn dog. That was breakfast, lunch, lunch, and dinner. that was everything I ever needed in my life. They put some whipped cream on top of it, put some more sprinkles on it.

Really? You picked up the stick and it was kind of like, uh-oh. I'm going to straight pot. You need to. The first bite, I was like, this is one of the greatest things that's ever happened to me. And then I found this one bite in the middle that was like if you took the best funnel cake you've ever had and mixed it with a little Debbie Christmas tree cake and Santa Claus himself had Mrs. Claus make it for you

and you were at the North Pole eating it underneath the blanket. With a big old glass of milk. When I tell you how magical it was, I'll never forget it. It was special. Oh, boy. It sounds special. Will that become a yearly thing for y'all now?

You know? Oh, he's going back tomorrow. There's a chance. I'm in a wedding this weekend, so I actually cannot go back. But I would consider going back. just for the Little Debbie on a stick. Is it?

I ain't but an hour and a half over. Yeah. But that's saying something because I don't even like going to Shreveport for any old reason. But these people turn Shreveport around single-handedly. Where's your head in Shreport? DeSoto.

DeSoto. So they're south of Shreveport. Look at it, Sa. I got a picture of the... I was sitting there and I had to send this to Martin. You crossed the river? Look at it. everything's better

$10. Worth it. Ma'am, charge double. Yeah, I'd do it. Good. Wouldn't even think twice about it. Never, I thought about going

and getting another one. Yeah. It was delicious. Yeah. And it was worth that road. I bought it. I bought an $11 cookie on Duval Street in Key West,

so don't, don't hear me. Yeah. And we got to talk about something else, too, because it was my wife's birthday, so I had to say yes. Yeah. To whatever she felt like doing that day. And she wanted to go to this

Christmas light place, which I was in on. That place was cool. And then they had that Christmas tree cake, so it took the top. But she was like, we'll go shopping in Shreport. And I was like, okay, whatever. You know where she most wanted to go? Bairns Pro. No.

That'd have been a toughie. That would have been better than where we went. Academy? No. And we got one of them too. I'm trying to figure out like. Cabellas? No.

No. I'm just trying to. We went to Target. Oh, cool. In Shreport? Cool. Y'all didn't even hit up Whole Foods? We went there too.

Oh, okay. But we went to all the way to Shreveport to go to Target. Yeah. There's is better, right? She was at our target the day before. But then she told me that this target is a super target. Oh. Which means it's better, but all that to me, it just would look bigger.

It had a grocery store in it. I guess, but we weren't getting groceries. Our targets got groceries. Does it? A little bit, yeah. I don't pay it. Not like full-blown meat market or nothing. What was that, donut light blanking?

At the Target? No, they didn't make it that far. Oh, you didn't go on in there? They didn't make it past. I have no idea. That's over everybody. Everybody knows about that place. I don't know.

Lights on, you better stop. I don't know. I don't know about Shreveport. I don't like it. It don't matter. But they had the, they had the, we had to go to Target. And then I complained, which I shouldn't have because it was her birthday. And then every woman she asked,

It's like, is Super Target different? And they claim it's super. It's a super target. It's the same thing. Yeah, something about Target and women, like mothed to a flame. Like, it's crazy. I don't get it. How much time women spend.

It's the logo. Or Targeet. Is it? I like to call it. To go out of town to go somewhere we already had. Yeah, Whole Foods I get because we don't have one. And every time I'm in Streetport, I stop at Whole Foods. Don't eat at that Mexican place beside it.

trash. But I wish we had one. I do wish we had a whole food here. That would be, that's a cool place. They got some interesting stuff in there. They got food. You can't get anywhere else. Yeah, I know, because it's whole. And it's health conscious. It's a stick. Hey, yeah. And that was not bought at Whole Foods. No. No, that is everything Whole Foods is again. A deep fried Christmas trip. Better hurry up. RFK get in there. That ain't going to exist. Oh, yeah. I will start a war. that is freedom of speech and to do what I want to do and if I want to eat a little Debbie

oh speaking of that that I don't remember what happened with Target over at Rusty not Target Buckees Bucky yeah well they got a bailout they well they ain't done they made up their mind where they're going to build it the latest on our own personal Buckees

is that by the time Carter is 30 we might have one. Really? Now, I think 2025 it should be finished. No, 2026 is the new estimate. I'm confused on what year it is. What year is it right now?

24. 24. We're staring down 25. Yeah. Staring down 25. Well, the funny part, Buckys is so good that like, whatever you put one in the town, they have to like rearrange all the traffic. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, that was going to have to happen. And so then they were like, hey, let's put it here. And they were like, then the kids can't go to school. And then they're like, oh. Yeah. Yeah, they got to redo some. Oh, it's a relocation project. I think they're having to build a whole new.

Yeah, it's a relocation project. Here you go. The news in November said, expected to be completed in mid-20206. There you go. They should deep fry. That's fine. New years.

That's fine. Two years. Two years. Yeah. Well, just go to Stryport until then. Well, Streetport doesn't have a buck. Oh, the target. Super Target.

Shreveport got enough traffic issues without a Buckees. Shreeport got that famous pickle. What's that? It's a big deal. It's a big deal. You got it? Oh, God. I walked right into that one.

I was like famous pickle. I was about to go back. I like pickles. Very few of his that I see Coven. I saw that one, though. I didn't see that one. Sad what did you do this week? What did the cupcake?

Made him a stacker coming up every one. They had to. Borkinville Christmas parade I had to go get me a little money from the bank Size only outing was to get a little cash I'm not going to presume what it was for Oh it was for the poker again And he got hung up in a pet

Hey that they bailed on me Suckers So you still got a pocket full of cash I still got a pocket full of cash What's you doing right now? Let me holler at you No No

I ain't home Let me hold a file Triptu shrieper I ain't home I pay you back Friday. I ain't home. That's the best part.

He accidentally got caught up in traffic. What he didn't know is he was just in the middle of the parade. Yeah, you should have just rolled you one. Everybody started waving. They thought you were. Oh, no. I rolled the water and everybody said, hey, there's Uncle Si. Yeah.

I said, yeah, I got caught. He thought he was in traffic. That's a, you were in a regulation parade. Yeah, redneck parade. You went from traffic to main attraction. Attraction real quick. Yeah, I tried to go around. Nope.

They ain't happening. Ain't happening. Traffic sucks. Guy one, how's the lights out there by your house? They thriving this year? Oh, yeah. The exits by my house now. Is it?

I was thinking about going and getting a hot chocolate machine and stand out there at the stop sign. $10 a cup. Yeah, there you go. Hey, now that's thanking right there. Yeah, Godwin lived by the lights too. All those are extra. Galvin, if you sold fried Christmas tree cakes right there.

Whoa. I mean, like, our road and the exit to that thing is like, my property is right across from. Time to sell, buddy. There's plenty of parking too. Yeah, $20 a spot. I like it. You bet you, maybe.

North Louisiana is into Christmas lights. That's what I've learned. Yeah. Why not? Over back of the house, they got the drive-through. It was a season. to be job. That was a idea for the century.

I'd do. He's rolling. Yeah, printing money. Just drive through my property. I'll put lights up. He does a good job. Give me $20. Drive through it.

Yeah. There you go. I even got a tunnel. Turn the radio on. The tunnel's fun. It is. It music and the light. I know.

Oh, yeah. We're going to do hayride through it. Yeah. Now you can do it. the hay ride. Isn't that where Hunter, isn't that where you took your new potential new old girlfriend or whatever? He's got a new old girlfriend.

He's got an old new girlfriend. That's maybe that. We looked at the Christmas lights on Antique Alley. Oh, y'all went free. Oh, you later know you cheat. That's good move. Hey, set expectations right out of the door, buddy. I ain't paying $20 for this.

I mean, he went after left over. Do it at our own pace, walk around. Have you taken your kids to the Christmas lights? Not this year. Not yet. I ain't been here. What are you doing, man? Christmas light season.

I know. We'll go. We'll go. They're of the age where you can unbuckle them and they will go wild in that car. That's what I'm worried about. That's going to be awesome. They just got flipped to looking at the world forward. You want to talk about blew their mind.

Like when they went from that backwards facing seat to what we're seeing, they're like, what. It's a great day in anybody's life. What happened? like how this is what this looks like now which yeah that's a wild time it was a cool experience to watch because we got them little cameras

back there looking at them and so to see their deal you got cameras looking at your kids in the car? Oh yeah oh yeah I feel like we had kids a hundred years apart

I got a five year old there wasn't any cameras back there might have been we had a mirror no well you could get the mirror or you can buy this camera It's like, I mean, it's super cheap. It was probably $20.

Yeah, it wouldn't nothing. It just plugs into your cigarette lighter. Or I guess that's what you call that thing still of your car. Does anybody light cigarettes with a cigarette? I don't even think it gets a, it comes to a deal. It gets hot anymore. It's a 12-volt plug. Yeah.

Redneck call it a spotlight plug. But I've always just grew up calling a cigarette lighter. But you just plug it in there and then hit the own button and you got two little cameras that watch the boys back there. Awesome. Well, you used to have it when they were turned. We had it mainly for when they were turned around. Yeah, you can see what they were doing.

Well, I make sure they ain't doing nothing, like choking on nothing. Eating something that they found in their clothes. Yeah, but now, I mean, we still have them just because they still work, but when they fry or something, we're not going to redo them because we can just turn around and look at them now. Well, they're about to the point you can just ask them what they're doing. Yeah. What are you eating? A frog.

Where did you get it? My diaper. They still lie to you because they know they ain't supposed to. Oh, no. Nothing? Nothing? Nothing. Wayland, everything he picks.

And no, I don't like it. I don't where he learned that from. He don't like it. He hands it to you. Is he not eat? No, he's very, very picky now. He's entered a picky stage. And it's stuff that he ate his whole life.

And now you hand it to him. No, I don't like it. I like, you little punk. Oh. You little punk, man. That's how our middle one is. He just assumed starve. Yeah.

No, I don't like it. I get tired of hearing that. Godly. I hear it in my sleep. Oh man. Good times. Yeah, no, man, it is good. Sa, you got any big plans for Christmas?

Nope. Nope. Okay. That is, boy. Moving on. Hunter, you got any big plans? If Sae seems a little down today. Before we did this, we filmed for two hours.

It's been a wild week, too. It's just hard. You know what the cupcake said to the frosting? I love you. I'm muffing without you I'm muffin without you didn't see that one in it that's a

I'm muffin without you you got to think on me what's you get Miss Paula for Christmas I was just hey look we get a lot of email what if she listens yeah she's not

if she does you already got you I got the suit that you bought from no I got that for anniversary that's like a year a guillie suit

oh yeah it works too yeah last year You get her like some new trail cameras or something? Yep. Yep. So what's this year? And a feeder.

I don't know. I'm thinking on it. I mean, I got a hurry. Yep. What's she getting you? Hopefully she'd give him his gun. I don't know. I know.

What do you want for Christmas, Guy? I won't. I don't really know. Hadn't. Man's got it off. I want everybody to love me. Well, I don't think he got to worry about that. Problem solved.

You like the most lovable. No, I don't know. Oh. Sigh, do you want anything specific for Christmas? I've got everything, Judy. See, this is why people complain about their dads and grandmas' gifts. Well, I'm serious.

And everything out. You're the hardest person to buy for. I'm really not. You know what I'm always thankful for? Sox and underwear. Praise God. That's just who you are. I know.

And I love them. Well, no, I was, you know, socks are a good gift. I'm legitimately thankful, too. Nobody believes me. I'm like, thank you. That's because you're old and boring now. Well, that's the stuff I don't like buying for myself. Where do your socks go?

That's what I want to know. Oh, in the trash. If one of them even sniffs of a hole being around. No. My wife sees it. Hold on, no. Your state. An ankle socks.

That is. That is. And I got socks that pull up past my ankle. And, you know, you need them in the wintertime when you're wearing your boots, your rubber boots, stuff like that. And then you got your ankle socks for summertime. But you don't wear a summer time. socks.

Most time I don't, but because they just, you never can't find them. You look in the door? In the wintertime, all your ankle socks are in the way. Summertime, you can't find them. I don't get it. No, no, because it's the same thing. What is it with women with holes in socks, underwear, or t-shirts that if you walk by one, especially if I walk by my wife?

First thing they see. Oh, no, hey, it's being ripped off. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Romance still a lot. Oh, no, hey. Okay. You know, I wore some socks the other day to hunt camp.

They had a hole in the top of them. You ain't going to see them again. She said, there's a hole in them sock. I said. My wife wouldn't have said nothing. All you were to hear was rip. Oh, yeah. Yeah, if I leave my clothes in the dryer or something, Brittany, get them out.

If there was anything that even looked like a hole or a hole or a, potential of a hole. I'm just going to have an odd shirt. Shirt's got a wrinkle in it. Shirts got a wrinkle in it. Yeah. I've got what...

Don't wear that to church? I've probably got a hundred socks and only like four of them are paired together. I know. I don't know where... I don't know what I got to look forward to when my kids get on.

Universal. That's a universal problem. Most of the time... Hey, you got different socks on. I got same socks on it. but most of the time my socks are different. Yeah. Bart gave me that Duck Commander socks.

Yeah. I wore them for a week. They go? No. Oh. They walk by themselves. I let them worship. Are they good?

Oh, yeah, they're good. Comfortable. Okay, good. Real comfortable. Hey, that's good. I still got a couple pair of the old duck. Me too. Oh, I got the old green ones that I wear just about every day of hunting season.

I got some pair of them. Well, that's like my army socks that I used to give Jason. and willing all them. Yeah. Jason's still got the hat, the winter hat. Oh, yeah. That's been like 50 years ago. Yeah.

I've got some socks with Phil's face on them that I will never get rid of. They're awesome. I wear them to church all the time. I need some with your face on them, sigh. Well, they put my face on everything else. Can't afford them. But you don't know what you're getting Miss Paula for Christmas. No.

Well, most of my Christmas. I usually get, I don't want to get her something for hunting. I want her to be special. So they'll might have to go shopping. So you're going to get her something for fishing. I don't know. I'd be special. Can't be for hunting.

She needs some new zip-off britches. Box of jigs. You can turn these brits. Paula, look, you can turn these britches into shorts with the power of a zipper. Watch of it. Yeah. Oh, man. So Martin wants socks.

I don't want socks. I don't want anything. always, I appreciate them. Now, most of ours was wrapped up in this trip. That was our, that was our bill. That's what you do now. When you get married, you start doing, say, we'll just do this for Christmas.

This will be our Christmas present. Yeah. But you're going to have something on the tree, so don't never doubt it. You better get something. No, I've already got her one way. Don't not get her something. See, that was the problem.

Allison, her birthday's the seventh, our anniversaries the 18th, and then I'm broke. that she got a new car in October, so I was going to try and just put a bow on the stupid car every... No.

But you got to do something at least, or you get in trouble. And if you asked her what she wants for Christmas and she says nothing, she's lying. You better get her something. Oh, yeah. I got her like air fresheners for her birthday.

Hey, there you go. That's good. It's simple. Yeah. Well, yours is kind of easy. You can always find like a cooking game. Dishwashing liquid. You can get her some dishwashing liquid.

She would actually like that. I did buy her an expensive vacuum one time for Christmas, and that didn't seem to go over well, even though it's what she said she wanted. Back when I was team roping, I bought some spurs for Paula that fit me. Uh-oh. Same size foot?

For her birthday, yeah. There you go. The best I ever saw. I said, here you go. She looked at them. I said, do you like them? She said, I put them at me.

I put them on. But that hurt. Hey, the best I ever saw, though, one Christmas, the biggest gift was for my mom. And nobody knew what it was. My dad got it for, and we didn't know what it was going to be. And it was a steel backpack leaf blower. Really? Janice used it a lot?

Oh, yeah. She was mad. But then she loved it. She was like, did you really just get me a leaf bower for Christmas? Yeah. I would like something like lawnmower or something. She'd rather work outside than inside. Oh, you get Ms. Paula a new weed eater?

God. Oh, yeah. I don't want a weed eater. I hate a weed eater. No, I love him. Wheat eaters are fun, man. Yeah, got one of them new electric battery-operated one. Yeah, there you go.

Keep gas and that stuff. Yeah, I have one of them, the battery don't wear no more. Yeah, that was a farce. What's you getting Christine? Nothing? Nothing. A sweater? You got to check, but she gets what she won't.

You make her rap it too. There you go. What an age. You Robertson's hopeless romantics, man. Oh, yeah. It is tough to get people like side gifts, though. If I buy or something, and then she don't like it, I just do, hey. You got to checkbook.

Go buy what you want. I do have her something. And it's head in plain sight. You? No. Oh. No, it's actually a present. You have it?

Hunter laughing over. I got it. I got to wrap it. You got to wrap it? Okay. But it's like, why didn't I look there? One of them places. Intrubial snake, I'd say.

I can't think of anything that Paula doesn't use where you would put it. I'm confused. That's what I'm talking about. You know, sometimes you just like put something in a microwave because it don't ever get you. No. The microwave. Not at our house, but. The best thing to do is get somebody something that they can cook you a meal with.

There you go. That is a move. That's a solid look. That is a tail as old as time. Pit ball spices. That'd be good. For a little set, set of pit ball spices. For Paula?

For me. Oh, for you. For me. Oh, so we're making your list now. Okay. Hey, no, but look, we do get a lot of emails in like, what do I get my dad for Christmas? Well, I like that. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. bunch of, yeah. A full array of spices. Some of them, uh, sage. Pine apple. Hey, I got a bunch of it. Only sage. I got a bunch of it. Only sage, baby.

Every year we get my dad something new to cook on. That's a good look. He cook for y'all every Sunday. Yeah. And so I benefit from it. Yeah, that's a solid. That's a solid gift. He deep fried the pork loin last night.

Ooh. It was good. Dad's, I mean, I would say, they were pretty easy. Just get them a widget. Like, they all enjoy something. They act like we're the toughest people to buy for, but we're really not.

No, just little widget. Get him a Cajun fire. Cajun fire. Or just something to put in a Cajun fire. Like, my dad, every year for his birthday, I just go to the grocery store. Go with Embril with his air friars. No.

Yeah. Are you doing air fires? No. What do you air fry? I just look at, see the commercial. Oh, he's on infomercials. Yeah. Commercial.

You watch TV. That's what Paula said one time. She said, we need to get one of them George Foreman grills. It's healthier. Hey. I said, have you seen George Farman? There's not a better guarantee in life. Are you bad mouthing out of George Foreman grill?

Huh? No, she said it's healthy because all the grease falls out of it. I said, have you seen George Farming? That is a good point. He was a heavyweight champion. Yeah. Do they still make the George Foreman grill? He was in the heavyweight division.

Well, he used to have a heavyweight division. Well, he used to have. have on. Oh, it made some good hot ham sandwiches because you can put the ham on it and the cheese on the other side, put them together, and you'd smash that down. Oh, you get them a little burn marks on your ham. Oh, yeah. When I tell you, the George Foreman Grill got me through college. I think it's the only thing I knew how to cook on. I can see that. Yeah, you couldn't really screw nothing up on him. Yeah. You just put whatever you want on there, close it, and come back in a minute and eat it. That's that.

Yeah, it was awesome. I do like a tabletop like Panini maker and stuff like it. Just to get bread and stuff like cheese melted and bread a little bit crisper. Like I'm in on those things. Way better than a toaster. Like I need to get. I want one of them flat grills. Flat grills.

Like a grittle. A hibachi. A grittal. Some call it a griddle. It depends on how high class you are. Yeah. A griddle. We got my dad one for it.

Johnny D's got one now. I got one. I got one. I got it for myself. You know who uses it more than me? Allison. You bailed that. Fried rice.

Anything you want. You'll never cook bacon anywhere else again once you go. Oh, it'd be so easy. Because you can cook a whole pack of bacon and like. You know what else was good at making bacon now? George Foreman. Really? Yeah.

It's George. Well, it's a griddle. It's a table top grid. But it's both sides. Yeah. George Foreman made $200 million on that thing. We got to come up with something. It was a good, too.

It still is. Yeah. We got to bring the George Foreman back. I went to college with a girl that lived next door to George Foreman. Did she? For real? Yeah. I drove past his house one time in Houston.

In Houston. She was like, oh, yeah, this is my house. I said, who lives at the place down the road? And she was like, oh, that's Mr. Foreman. That's Mr. Joel. I'd be kind of tight. If you got to, like, call George Foreman, George. What's up, George?

I don't know that they ever met. He had a very large wall around his house. Yeah, most of it. It was a big house built by little tiny $34 grills. That's awesome. That's American Dream right there, man. Yeah, sure we. Be able to punch someone so hard,

you can sell $200 million worth of grills. Knocked the money out of him. What about? He knocked the money. Every time. Hit him and just coin starts. Hold on. Sa.

that's what we got to do. That's it. We're all about to retire. We need an Uncle Sai kitchen appliance that's as good as... Oh, the Uncle Sai tea maker. We smash. Why? You just put a bag of tea and walk away, coming back, and there's a whole thing done.

A whole galah. A whole galah. A whole galah. I don't know, but guarantee you somebody just ripped it off. They can't use him. No. No, we'll smash, though. You would.

The Uncle Sytee maker. I used to have that tea maker that you... Then it... What? Was that last part? You put the water in the top of it, psh. Oh, yeah, the lifting little thing. Oh, no, Phil's got one there.

What? Is that no good? I hate that stupid thing. Oh, Said always runs away. He don't know how to operate. How's that? That's just, hey, put it in a pot, boil it. No, no, you can't say that.

Put it in a microwave and microwave it. Sight, we're about to make $200 million off of the Uncle Sioux Temaker. Yeah, you got to get all fat. Everybody already own a microwave. We've got to get them something I ain't got. What about? What about?

Okay. If you're in the team making business, call us. I got an idea. You got an idea. George Foreman. Y'all call him. Call him. Your people call my people. Call him, y'all. George Foreman. I said, just send me my chat. Yeah, what's that?

So I did ask. Hello at dot callroom.com. We asked on Instagram, but I'm going to give them a second chance here. If you've got one of those Spotify wrapped, I think Apple wraps it, and they tell you, hey, this was your top podcast of the year. year or whatever. We try and do it every year. Recognize some of our fans that listen a lot. Kobe from Southeast Texas emailed in and I think he's on Apple Music, Apple Podcasts, listening to us. We were his top podcast of 2024. Well, thank you, sir. He listened to us for 19,113 minutes.

Awesome. That is great. I guess my first question is why. That would equate to 318 and a half hours of listening to this podcast, which equates to 13 days. Wow. Of the last 11 months, he has spent 13 days listening to you, Sai. Sai, how does that make you feel? Well, hey, I must say something that's interesting. Every now and then. Every now and again.

Every now and again. So, yeah, that's insane. If you beat Pat, please email it in at Hello at Duck Call Room. But wherever you're at, share your wrapped. We'd love to see them and like and subscribe and all that stuff. Did you see how I just did that like a professional podcast? There you go. Just wrap that all in.

Rap, you Spotify wrapped it. Oh, do you want to show everyone the most listened to episode? What was the most listened to episode, Hunter? I don't know that. I sent you a screenshot of it. I thought that was the most commented episode. Oh, wait. That might have been it.

Oh. But I do take great pride in this. Do y'all have any idea what the most commented episode was? Oh, your son. Gotta be. He nailed it. We got a future president and star on our hands. All right.

He got the most. Uncle size wrongfully detained by the TSA at the airport. Boy, it's a good thing I took that picture. That was our most commented episode of the year. That was funny. with young Carter showing up. Spotify gave us a personality, by the way. What do y'all think it was?

I don't know. Are there like choices? I don't know. I don't know. Whimsical? Whimsical? Nope. Our podcast creator personality is the storyteller.

Dang, ding, ding. So we have a market and we're pretty good at nailing it. Yeah. Ding, ding. And then one of our top episodes was, for some reason, Martin working at a circus. I have no recollection. You worked at a circus?

No, but I put together toys for the circus. Did you? For Bayrak? Didn't the Shriner Circus had always been to town? Oh, my daddy was a claim. You did the toys for them? Well, when I was a kid, so my grandfather and my father were both Shriners. Okay.

So part of the deal, like the way they keep the cost down on all the, that stuff for to, you know, to have a good price circus. Child labor. It's child. Well, not even child, but like everybody that was a member and their family went out there and, like, the toys come in like seven different parts and you would assemble them before they sold them. And so that was always, I did that.

I don't know until my grandfather quit or, you know, passed away doing the Shriner stuff. Yeah, I did that my whole life growing up. We would, I mean, I was always fun because like as a kid, I got. got to see the toys before everybody else. But I don't care if I ever put together one of those flashlight ever again in my life. You know, you throw it out there and it's just a flashlight with like a-

20 bucks now. Yeah, it was a toughie, man. Putting them D batteries in there and then having to make sure all that stuff was lined up. D batteries are expensive too. Yeah. But no, I did that. Me and my brother,

my cousins and my grandparents and my dad, like all, the whole Martin family was out there helping with a symbol, Shriner toys for the local Bay Rack Shriner Circus here in Monroe, Louisiana, every, every year for that. That was always something to look for it. Because the old women who, you know, were married to the Shriner. I mean, most of the time, Shriners were older people.

Most of the time, the old women cook for everybody. So, like, you got, like, Grandma's cooking a times 20, right? I mean, you know, because there was every family. It was like a pot lot. Yeah. Yeah. But every family signature dishes were there because that was always a big deal for the women to feed all the volunteers and stuff putting together the money for the circus, which then in turn raised money for the Shriner's hospitals, which does a lot of great work for kids and all the things. So, yeah, that was a core memory of my life was putting together toys for the Shiner circus.

Yeah, man. You putting together toys and Carter's starting off the side. That's pretty cool. Yeah. Really is. Yeah. Because they felt a lot of people. Oh, absolutely.

I mean, they locked. Our next email comes from somebody, and I don't get this. I'm just going to preface this. Well, read it. Maybe we can get it. Well, it's a picture. A picture. A British person.

There's a TV show called The Midwitch Cuckoos. I don't know what that means. This little girl looks like she's murdered people, but they're saying this person looks like me. And I don't. Oh, absolutely. Absolutely, buddy. Does it really? Yeah, from like when I first started showing up at WFR when on the times you would shave.

Is that me? Buddy. I don't think that little girl. Go find a... That is a little girl who's killed people on British television. I'm most certain. But find a picture of you clean shade. Go to your wedding.

You got a wedding photo? I mean, around here somewhere. Look on your phone for a wedding photo and put them side by side. The facial expression. Yeah. Oh, that is closer to you. You think that person looks like me? Yeah.

I absolutely do. I was trying to stick out for my No, no, without the beard. Yeah. Well, that's a little girl, so I hope she wouldn't ever have a beard. I mean, there's nothing wrong being cute. Yeah.

No, no. Okay, here we go. There's me the last time I shaved in 2012. Buddy, if you don't see. Okay, you don't see them. What is happening? If you don't see that, I'm sorry, pal. You could put your face in right hand.

there's nothing changes. Like, I'm sorry if you don't see that pal. I think she kind of looks like Carter. That's pretty well. And Carter is a clone of John David. Oh, no. We have British family out there. So I don't like this anymore.

I would, British royalty. I'd really like to see you with those bangs. Oh, I've got to get you by son's phone number. We do need to do it. We got to get Connor and Carter. We got to get together to talk about,

we got to get together. Talk about Vietnam. Okay. I'm sure. A couple old 10-year. old's really liked to be. They're just

exactly a lot. Yeah. They're chopping up about old mom stories. Yeah. Um, and then Keith emails in.

This will probably be our last one. Keith emailed in. And he just read Psychology 1. And it literally brought him to tears. Hmm. Um, but he said it was the second best book he's ever read.

That's awesome. That's high praise. What was the first? He said? Yeah, he did. That was a, uh,

a unique book. The Bible? I hope. Yeah, it was a unique book for one's simple reason. It was my whole life through my stories. Isn't Eagle the Pigeon in Psychology one? Oh, yeah. Yeah.

That's a good. That's a good one, no matter how many times you hear it. It's hard to figure out how to... Look, people want to say that it actually literally didn't break his neck, it turned his head 180 degrees. Here he goes. Okay, and did he kill him? And, you know, the only thing that was different was,

you're looking at his chest, and he's looking at the other way. Yeah, nobody's sneaking up on him. Nobody's going to sneak up on him. No. That's wild. There are some good stories in that book. Yeah. You can still get it on Amazon.

If you're wondering what a good Christmas, that's just, I didn't even plan that. Good Christmas gift? The second best book ever written. Next to the Bible, according to Keith. That's high praise. Hey. That's why we was, we was

a label, the storyteller. He's a storyteller. We are storytellers, boy. Well, Martin, you ready? Close it out. Let's close it out here. We're just going with the straight up verse of the day from verse of the day.com.

Oh, oh. Romans 129, love must be sincere, hate what is evil, and cling to what is good. psychology one's good it's good and hey and the bottom line is that's god's religion thank you love okay love there's three love one faith hope and love and what's the greatest love amen buddy we love you all happy holidays everybody enjoy your christmas this year and a happy new year we're out