Duck Call Room - Si & Phil Robertson Are a Menace to Anything with an Engine

Episode Date: August 11, 2022

Si and Phil Robertson have highly unusual ideas about what it takes to maintain anything with an engine. Martin signs on as Godwin's keto diet accountability partner. Si has STRONG feelings about salad dressings, but there's one that's a total gar. Stone is already shopping for Bullfrog's first car, and Si waxes nostalgic about his first vehicle. Si gets fired up about idiot drivers. John-David reveals a happy ending for a fan who needed relationship advice. And the boys help out a shy kid who wants tips for making new friends. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

side what you've been doing well we've been stoned once a surrey arkansas oh yeah y'all went trout thursday and friday we fished friday afternoon i mean thursday afternoon and then fished uh friday morning what you got and caught a bunch of brown trout you did yep the water was high they was generating electricity on the dam. The water was high and flowing fast, and the brown trout bite was on. I never did work it out, though. I called a couple.

Yeah, he noticed. Stone was on fire. He said we called. Yeah. Yeah. Stone was on fire. He called about probably 25 rounds, and the biggest one, like four pounds. He had a few three.

Oh, it was real nice. How many? How many? I called about three. I called about three browns. One of them was about two and a half. No, I called about three. Stones had one.

I called a couple of old ones. We got fly fishing? No. No. No. Trout magnet fishing. Jigs. Jigs.

The trout magnets. Yeah. But it was a jig. A maribou. Yeah. The new one. It's a new one. It's a new man.

One of Jeff Smith's new inventions. The maribou. The real question. is did you bring me back some of them filets so I put some of this dubbies also we didn't what we did not keep a fish we caught all of them and catch them release oh them um them uh trap people if you grab a trout the wrong way they get they get mad oh yeah so they really don't want you to lay a knife to them that trout people are kind of not all but but the rainbows in that little red river they're all good eating are all rainbow they're stocked they don't mind you keeping some of them

and eating them, but the native, the brown trout are native. They are pretty, too. And they're not any good anyway there. I figured they'd be good eating. No. And I had to re-correct themselves because they said, no, they ain't very good. Well, how do we know if they won't let you keep? Well, no, no, well, I'm just saying I looked at it.

It's such a beautiful fish. I said, this is bound to be good eating. I'll send you a picture. And then they said, no, it ain't good eating. You put that w sauce on that rascal. He's ready to eat, son. Martin, all that, Martin, you got more dupy sauce? I got some.

You got some right there? I brought some right here for stall and take on with him. I was supposed to bring some last time. Man, he's got to invite me or not, whatever he cooks. And put that on, he's got to invite me so I test it. Well, I've tried it on everything but fish, so I sent you out on a mission and you just threw them off. But you didn't catch but one, so you ain't really got a. Oh, that's a big one.

Oh, yeah. Catch and release. Man, that's a good one. Oh, no. Pretty, honey. Five. That's not a fish. That's a deer.

A deer? Oh, that's what are you? Oh, he's showing you touchy. I just sent it to you. You get it? Touchy. There you go.

There you go. Look how pretty that thing is. That is pretty fish. Beautiful fish. And I mean, it's slam full of them. I tried to not touch him with too many fingers. I don't want nobody. Yeah, they get, they do that.

Getting upset. He's got the typical guitar poles there with it. Get a car. Yeah. You got your fingers set up right for G-court. No, I'm lying. That's probably why you can't play to get to us. Well, but it was a very enjoyable trip, as always.

That's a unique place. Just think about it. It's 90 degrees when you get up on the hills. When you go down to the boat route, it drops to about, oh, 55 between 55 and 65. About 75. No, it's not. It ain't no 75. It's about 55 to 65.

Because hey, my beard was wet just from moisture in the air. That's because that water is about 40. 48. How is it that cold? 48 year round. Yeah, Greer's Ferry. Yeah, Greer's Ferry is in the mountains. Okay.

The lake is real deep, deep, real lake. Oh, y'all right under the dam. Yep. Oh, I mean, this 48 degrees. Anywhere are you on the river. Year round. Little river river, it's cold. Yeah, there was that one time where we lost a bet, and I had to go in the water.

Oh, yeah, I remember that. Oh, you get hypothernpy. hypotherpathy hypothermia ain't nothing junk around with Martin If you don't want

hypothermia you better not ever get hypothermia That hypotherpy is even worse That hypotherpy is even worse That hypotherpity puts you six foot under son

You can make it through hypothermia That's right But you ain't gonna make it Through the other one If you make it through That's what I'm talking Oh I'm here to

He said hypothermia Oh Lord Well while y'all was doing that Me and Gobbin was headed to Pensacola, Florida to speak of the deal. How'd that go? It's good. It was me, him, David Blanton, Michael Waddell for a sportsman's night out.

Y'all had a crew. Oh, it's good, yeah. Yeah. How y'all be proud to know? I kept Godwin on his plan. He, yes. Okay. You have more out?

I tried to make sure he didn't do nothing crazy. All right, that's good. And he didn't? He didn't go too crazy. We kept it regulated anyway. Okay. For dinner, he had a salad. Okay.

Now, he did like a thousand island dressing because the goblin's the only man I know that eats that stuff. Yeah, that's the first question he asked everywhere we go. You got a thousand island? I'm like, I, what? Why is there a thousand of them? Why not just call it island? What's it got to do with? I have no idea. Just ketchup and ranch. And mayo. And man, no, it ain't. That's pretty much what it is. No. Yeah. I am. Okay. I can't see how y'all eat ranch. What? You're talking about a gar-hole. My favorite is Caesar.

You're talking about a gar-hole. Rance, Justin? I don't even know how they come up with that garbage. Rains is pretty good if you put halopinas in it. No, I like that. You can't make that great good. But Caesar is my favorite. I'm a Caesar salad guy.

Yeah, I'm with you on that. What kind of dressing? I like a good vinegar writ. Of course you do. You eat jarred olives, jarred peppers. Everything you eat is vinegar. That tea by the time you get through with it, you put so much of acid from them lemons in it. I was going to say.

The man loves assing. His insides are very well preserved. You've seen that brand new truck he's got? It's a fine rig. What's it look like on the inside? That console is just slam full of them lemon packets. Lemon packets. It's about 500.

The whole time I was driving up for a rocker's up one. It would break out three packets right quick. Fill it up. Put it a little bit and drink it. How many times do you all pee on the way up there? Oh, I never just stop. We didn't stop up there. I stopped once on the way back.

Oh, my word. Interesting. It was a nice little trip. Hey, we did hit up at Buckees at the beach. Oh. You did one at the beach? Mm-hmm. He hit the Buckey.

Were you okay? We came through at like 5.30 in the morning. Okay. Okay. Hey, shout out to them. They got like a keto bowl for breakfast. A guy wouldn't got some little keto bowls for his breakfast. It was like eggs and brisket and cheese in a bowl.

That's it. And ain't nothing ever been wrong with that. Not nothing, but he did say, we got to get out of here. There's too much candy. He's looking all them candy nuts over. I was like, hey, just get you a couple of them keto bowls and we'll roll on down the road. Does he go on keto? He's got to do something to keep that blood sugar in check.

So, yeah, he hadn't, I didn't see him eat anything sweet. I gave him a protein bar, had like five grams of sugar on the ride down and brought them for him. And then that's it, though. He's at least in front of me. I don't know what he's doing behind him. and closed door. He's at least trying. But in front of me, he's making a commitment.

So we go to Minnesota this Thursday again. So I'm going to make sure. Minnesota. He's going to have a full weekend of accountability again. So, you know. But, hey, I'll keep it with it. I didn't mind it. I was like, I don't have to have bread going.

It ain't a big deal to me. So whatever. I'm sure Ms. Paula's on him, too. And I'm scared of Paula. You should be. Like a hot. Out of the two God ones, She's the one to be feared.

I can assure you that. That's right. Whether you're a deer or a human, fear her. Goblin, you ain't gotta be too scared of him. I've only made Godwin mad once and I felt so bad because he had that knee surgery and I was in, I was bumped into him while he was sitting down. I bumped straight into his knee and he gave me a look, you dummy. And I was like, all right, I've done it, I've made God with mad. I'm the worst human on earth.

That's how I felt. You don't want to make Godwin mad. People driving on the road make him mad. I can tell you that. I'm riding with him, yeah. If they refuse to use a cruise control, he is no fan of them. What is it about road rage? The people that you would never think had road rage, they got it.

Well, it's just people being idiots, too. They go 85 and then they're down to 60. And when you look over there, they're going 60 because they're texting. and then they're back up to 85 once they hit sin. No, no, no. That one over there is. Somebody's point. I know.

Hey, it's roadway. I understand it because, hey, look. You know, I'm with Ron White, okay. You know, there's some things you can fix. But sheer stupidity, you can't fix it. Can't fix it? And there's a lot of it out there on the highways. Oh, yeah.

Okay. I mean, it says, it's posted everywhere and just common knowledge. The left flank. is for the people that want to drive fast. Look, if they can pay the ticket, get out of their way and let them go by. You're not supposed to break the law. I'm just saying, hey, if they can afford to pay the ticket

and usually if somebody's driving fast, he can afford to pay the ticket. Get out of the way. Get out of its darn way and let him drive 80. And then just, hey, wish him well. And say, hey, if you get pulled over, you've got the money. So, hey, go and pay a ticket.

Break the law, as long as you're willing to do. You know. Long as you can pay the fine. But the person that likes to drive 35, oh, Toby Keith wrote the song about it. Town of 35 miles of hour. They love to get in the fast lane, and they ain't getting over no matter what you do.

Let's get over and take our first break. We'll be back right at. They're going to stay and then drive that 35 miles. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means? That means more outside. cook and and y'all know we love to eat beef around here and that's what because of our friends over

at tritels beef makes such a good product baby ain't it good it's so good it's our friend sall robertson would say buy on the grill look before we got tritels getting ready for a cookout man somebody had to run the grocery store do all the things grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day and you never really know where that beef come to them but with tritels beef we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Triedales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch, so they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their stakes are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on

the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I'll tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Triedails beef. I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat. Yeah, she and a big meat easier, folks.

Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash. Support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. Cy is passionate about. Oh, hey, drive. Drive. Toby Kee.

It's got a, hey, the thing. It's got tires, wheels on it. It's got a steering wheel and it's got an accelerator. And if you've got one that's got the stick, it's got five gears. Go through them all five fast. And get out of the way. Speaking of that, we had a good time this weekend. I went down to my buddy's place and we were just riding around in his Jeep and that's a five-speed.

Well, his 10-year-old son wanted to learn how to drive a standard. So we were like... Oh, yeah, this is fun. Okay. A tent. Ten. Get in here, Bill. Yeah, we got that seat up there.

He can't even see over the front of the Jeep. Like, with it all the way up and where he can reach a clutch and everything, he cannot see over the front of the Jeep. Nor can he figure out how to let off that clutch and go with that gas at the same time. It's all or nothing. Coordination. I mean, it felt like I was back riding some kind of bucking Bronco. But it was fun watching.

I told him, I said, you keep this up. You'll be the only person. at your school that can drive a standard. That's right. I said, I'll guarantee it right now. Yep. But it was hilarious. I remember, it took me back to learn how to drive on them rascals.

How many times you'd stall out? His worst was thinking he was in reverse, but he was actually in like third. That's dangerous. Damn. You know. Well, that's when you get, they get to gear real close. Yeah, well, and he didn't realize, you know, he don't know. His little short arms, he thinks all the way over third.

I'm like, no, you got to keep going. So reverse on. over. Because when I got to drive the race car, I done the same thing. I figured they had them souped up a little bit where it wouldn't be no problem to get the clutch out and it dying. Oh, no. Wrong answer.

I stalled that sucker seven times in a row. Then I said, hey, I may burn the tire to blow it up, but I ain't fixed the stall at this time. Burn the tires? I gave it some gas. Did you burn the tires or blow it up? Oh, yeah. I made the best run, just left to put it that way. all the rest of them, they had timed it,

I made the fastest run. He starts fast. And I started scalling it. I can't drive a standard. Really? One time I did, I ended up at like the busiest intersection of Westmore. They're too darn close together. Which isn't that busy.

They're too close together because like Martin said, you think you in first, you know? Because what you do is just you push to the left and then if it's supposed to be when you hit that gear, it's supposed to be first. Nah. It's third gear. Yeah.

When you get it in the first, you know it there, and you got some gas on it. Here we go, baby. And then, hey, you know, tack it out, tack it out. Hey, just get after it. You want to hear something scary? Go ahead. I was car shopping for bullfrog last week. Uh-oh.

Oh, that's scary. It is scary. Isn't that scary? She'll be driving next year. Oh, I thought you were talking about the price of vehicles. No, no. That and his dollar fix to be in a car. I was on the black box, as Phil Cawes it, looking at cars on the...

The phone. On the Internet. And I scrolled down and I saw one. Well, if you ain't got a fox on the screen, you ain't getting a good deal. A fox? Okay. You got to have a fox in the screen. So I scrolled down and I saw one that it looked too good to be true.

Why is this thing this price? And then I looked. Standard transmission. That's right. There you go. That's why. They can't get rid of them. Uh-uh.

Oh, that's what Bullfrog needs in. She need to learn how to drive a stick. Hey. Of all the kids, I know, she'd probably be the one to do it. Yeah, she could do it. She's about to be 16? 15. Yeah.

That's crazy. Oh, no. Unreal. Yeah. Time flies, baby. Always getting old. Long in the tooth. Getting old.

Buying cars for kids. Oh, I got. Not buying diapers. You got one. Well, my wife is driving it. See, it's her. She just, I think she planned it, where if she had enough kids, she'd have a new vehicle every year for about three years. Oh, man.

She gets it. He comes from good blood, son. Yeah. Her dad. She got her little hot ride over there. Oh, yeah. Hernandez? Oh, yeah.

It's fine. Look at Reg. My first truck was my dad's old truck. That was sweet. My dad wouldn't give me his old truck. He said, you'd tear it thing up. He went to lock me one that was a big. them worse than heat.

Yeah. But that worked. That worked. That worked. Didn't bother me none. Close to being in the junkyard. What was your first car? Uh, mild tea? Shoot, I can't even remember.

Pain horse. Hey, I was, what, 40 years old. I got a first car. Was he really? No, I don't remember how old I went. Oh, yeah, I do. You had to be about 18 or 20. No, no, I just remember the first car I bought.

It was a Plymouth. Was a 383. Five-speed hearse transmission. What color was it? Yellow. Canary yellow. Was it really? I was trying to make a joke.

What year model was it? I won't say 68. It was a fine thing. See if you can find it. It was a fine thing. Oh, no. Then a woman when I met her, she worked in a factory where she made cushions. So I told her, said, hey, since I said,

you're going to be riding me. You've got to make a cushion to sit on this console right here where you're sitting right next to me. Is that it, sir? It's like that. Mine was better looking. That thing's pretty cool.

Oh, no. Mine was better looking because it's totally yellow. Look how long that thing. Oh, yeah. No, no. It had the... The fans coming off the back. Yeah.

That's actually cool. How much did you pay for it? About $2,000. Let's take a break. We'll be back. We're going to take a break with his fash cards, boys. That is a fine rig. Oh, it was.

$2,000. I had a lot of money, though. Oh, back in them days, yeah. I had a lot of money. Yeah, I guess. That hamburger was like a nickel. He's giving them away. And look, and I didn't put oil in it.

What? I didn't put your regular oil in it. What did you put? The boughs were leaking, y'all. It was oil leaking. The boughs. The boughs. Your bals were leaking?

Everything leaked in that sucker. Okay. You Robertson. Look, I'm just glad to know. You didn't have... No, no, no. I bought it that way. Well, but here's what I'm glad to know,

is even before y'all had anything, you still didn't give a rip about maintenance. Well, no, no. Because every since I've rolled up on his bunch. Well, no, no, it was good, man, just look, because I just pulled up in... When I got married, okay, from Fort Devons. okay we threw everything we own in the in the yellow plumbus yeah and big bird

hey look i'd pull it in the gas station and got to fill up with gas i said no i said hey what have you got that's thick you know i need some oil oh you put oil in the gas tank yeah what is that stuff and it comes out of a tube and i mean grease that's grease well it ain't grease. Oh. I can't even think of name of it.

But it was in a tube. You know, and it took me forever just to get it to go in the oil.

Grease. You know, it was biting on real, real thick oil. So like Phil's coffee? Well, no,

oh, worse than that. Okay. But I put four of them in there with one quarter of oil.

That's what I do every time I pull it in and made a sludge. Just sludge. Every time you got gas, you had to do that?

Yeah. Oh, I've got, yeah. I didn't, half the time I didn't put gas in it. It was good on gas by it. I'm no handy, man, but I just, I don't know. Oh, no, that may be run fine.

Now, look, I will say I had a truck, my first truck. I didn't never really get the oil chain. It burned enough, and I had to put about three quarts in it between every oil chain, so I never really. Oh, no, no, no, because that's... I didn't really have to take anything out. I mean, I just had to add into it. Yeah, I just got tired of getting 30 weight.

It wasn't thick enough. So I said, well, I was looking around there, and it's some kind of real thick, thick oil that you put in. It's supposed to make them run better. Well, hey, I just said, if it makes it run better. Yeah, I said, hey, if it runs better, hey, I instead of putting one, I'm going to put four of them in one quarter ball. What it did make it run good.

Makes it run better. Throw four of them in there. I'm sure glad I know you now, but I'd love to have known you then. Golly. Oh, hey, it'd have been magical. I'm here to tell you. You're talking having fun, so I had some fun. You know, with my new job, I'm having to deal with a lot of nine cents like that.

What's that? No maintenance. No maintenance and overfilling of the oil reservoirs and every piece of equipment on Phil's property. Hold on. You'd have been proud of me the other day stone. You'd have been proud of me the other day stone. Yeah, because, hey, look. What happened?

Yeah. Philip Macmillan drove my truck on the way. to Houston and I don't know he can't see it with something but he was always washing my windshield yeah well he made the reservoir empty so I said okay I need to put water in reservoir before we go to uh our Thursday Arkansas so one day I got the book looked okay talking me like where's stupid water reservoir you know they finally showed me okay yeah look for the windshield wiper emblem on a plastic cap you know I'll pop pop up that went out of look, and there was two or three of them that looked suspect.

You know, and I said, hmm, hold it. No, I ain't right. I said, and I sure don't want to pour the water. Into the antifreeze. Yeah, yeah, I don't know. Or breakwood or whatever. You know, so I finally found it, you know, filled it up. Then I put water in it.

And I said, well, I spayed it the first time when, you know, soap coming out. So when we stopped at the chairhouse, you know, I said, hey, gets a, Liquid Dane, I need you to come out there and put a few drops in my water reservoir for the windshield. And now it's working good because I tried it when I went home. So you got Dahn and this soap coming down to your windshield? Oh, yeah. Yeah, they have to clean the bugs off of them. Bugs are hard to get off.

They make this stuff if you stop right down there where you drive past about seven times a week. What is that? It's called Windshield washer fluid. It'll just pour it right in there. Yeah, but they ain't got nobody to do it anymore. You still have a man come out there and talk about it. You don't hit check the oil to do that and check your windshield wipers and all that. Now that you know where it is, you could pour it in yourself.

That's right. Hey, there you go. I make you a deal. You stopping by a bottle. I'll put it in there for you. It ain't about getting the stuff. That ain't what it's done. So Phil's got a bush hog down there.

Heavy-duty bush hog. We need it. We got a lot of button willets. so there's some alumites on the gear box when the last time they saw grease so no he's really good about putting grease on things feel is

so instead of that's one thing he does do it takes too long to put the get a grease gun get a grease gun put on atomite squared it that takes too long so what you got what you ought to do

is it's just pop open that gearbox and get you about five tubes and just fill the whole gearbox up and pack it tight full of grease put put it back together and screw it down and you're good for five years and then put caulk on outside of it that way no that way you can't get back in it that's right hey that's what you do for wheelburn that's what's what you do for wheelburn parking full of grease put it on that slap it on it and close it off right be going yeah but there's still another alamite on the outside to add grease you don't cap it in there yeah but but water get in there's going to ruin everything that's right but that thing is still running it is well hey here's a deal though when it goes that far don't change nothing because as soon as you change something

whatever was holding everything together in there is gone he gone and it'll never work again that's right like that carfield on ford he never changed oil and i don't think he ever added oil There you go. How long did that last? He told me to do it. I'd barred it. I took it in. It was leaking.

So I told the guy, I said, hey, put me some new valve covers on there. He took him off and he said, he said, this car has never had the oil changed or none of that, right? And I said, no. He said, I could tell. He said, you tell him a junk. Oh, it's shut. But it still ran.

But it ran. The Phil's motto is run it till it tears up and get another one. Then drop it off at Jimmy Reds and go get another one. Red's got a project and you've got a new piece of equipment. It's a fair trade. But he was doing that before he had money. That's what I'm saying. That's why I was glad to hear that about Si.

At least he's consistent. Yeah. This isn't a new problem. Oh, no. They just hate maintenance. It's not a problem according to Zai. Yeah. It's just the way the way things are.

That's just way you're running. Piece of junk. That's your mode of operation there, boys. And he's called more equipment stupid pieces of crap than any human being on. Oh, no, well, here's the whole thing. Nothing built, okay, is meant to be used like a Robertson uses it. So is that a problem with the equipment or you? Yeah, no, it's just the way things are.

It's not a problem. It's the way it is. That's like a four-wheel drive truck. Mm-hmm. It wasn't meant to be used 12 months out of the year in four-wheel drive. Well, yeah. That's why you can put it in and take it out. Hey, that's why they call it off-road.

You're supposed to just get off the road every now and then when you want to do it for fun. Well, when you got a man that lives in the woods and, hey, he's in the woods 12 months out of the year in mud. Yeah. Okay. Nothing was built to take that. Don't take care of nothing. Yeah. Well, you're there for, Stone.

That old black Toyota. Oh, no, that's why you have... That's why you have a man like Jimmy Redd on standby call at all times. You've got to find somebody more dependable than that. He don't take care of nothing either. Well, no, but he can fix anything. I wouldn't call that fix is a strong word he's a band-aid man that's right well I'm just saying he can keep it running

he can get you to somewhere where he can keep it running yeah he's a parts changer at best I mean that's he ain't a fixer no no no but you get him the right part he can get it back in there he can't do that so oh man unbelievable let's take another break we'll be back right after this we need to bring red in The problem is... You say can't fix things. Why would we bring them in? But, yeah.

Ladies and gentlemen, we just had a break. We're going to need Red to phone in it. We had a big argument during the break about whether Red can fix things or not. And Si says they're in error. Si uses the term fix rather loosely. Here's where... Well, wait a minute.

Define Fix. Here's... No, here's what it is... There's something that will not run. Nope. Okay? It's not just for a... For example, air condition will not run.

Call Mountain Man. Hey, no. Hey, set it on the side road somewhere down there where it lives. And next thing you know. Hey, 10 minutes later, drive by his house, I'm going to tell you what's going to happen. At that condition, it'll be in his window running.

And it'll never be the same. Well, it'll be running and cooling that. Cooling it, I'm telling you. He's a Band-Aid man. His fixes aren't long term. Well, I can, all I'm saying is, because I had a truck. Okay. Which one?

Oh, that brown. The Ford? Yeah. Okay. I took it and spent like $800 who had a short in it. Mm-hmm. I'd done spent $800. I'd get it back.

Nope. And he fixed. So I took it down to red one day when I got sick of it. I'd done spend another $200. I spent $1,000 total to get fixed. I said, Ray it. I said, I got a crisp $100 bill right here. Crisp.

I said, hey, find the short and fix it. And somebody come by and took me down to the field house, okay? It was five minutes. He came down there and drive in my truck, he said, I fixed it. He was on the mat, the floor mat. Bad wearing, okay. And he fixed it. Yeah, and when I, you know, I said, well, here's your $100.

He told, oh, no, no, no, no, I ain't going to take my money. Give me a Coke. Yeah, he said, hey, you know, give me a Coke Cola. And I said, hey, what did I tell you? And he said, you said, $100 if I fixed it. He said, yeah, but it wasn't five minutes. I said, right, I don't care if it was five hours. I said, I told you I'd give you $100 if you fixed it.

You fixed it. So, hey, here's the $100. Get out here. Now, did it ever break again? No. All right. No. Not that.

That's repaired. Yeah. Yeah. I'm just saying if it won't run, red can get it running within five minutes. Okay, I knew another guy like that. Look, he'd live next door to me when I was stationed at Fort Bragg.

Not Fort Bragg, Fort La, uh, uh, Peuk, Louisiana. Polk. Yeah, Polk. You know, I needed a two. I needed a grinder for something. Or, you know, so I go to my next door neighbor, knock on the door, and I said, hey, you got a, you ain't have been one of them big grinders.

do you? He said, yeah, come on. Come with me. So went out to a shed, and this room about twice as big as this room right here, square. Yeah, pretty good size thing. And I mean, it's

everything's on the wall in neat places, every time. And this person's like real? No, no, and I'm looking, and there's about ten grinders on the wall. He said, choose the one you want. Well, I got talking to them later later after I got to know him real good.

His job was, he used to push garbage around at the dump. Oh, it's a landfill? Yeah, at the landfill. Oh, he was... He was a pack rat. No, no. Everything in that building.

Okay. I mean, he had grinder. He had all kinds of electric tools, okay, that he had found at the dump. Mm-hmm. And it would need a switch. It would need a cord. you know the plugs bad and I guarantee you he had like $30,000 worth of equipment in there

oh yeah my dad same way out there at the mill somebody say something broke throw it away he go out there and grab it and it's still hanging in his shop running yeah you still go grabbing and look the guy would say oh I said what did all you know I said you had to repair all this stuff he said oh $10 $12 on that $13 on this one of them giant grinders I mean a big one that you auto makers use. You know, them things are expensive. He had 15, 15

up there. And hey, all the wrong was switch. He keeps getting on. He could fix anything. Oh, no. He had $30,000 worth equipment in there that he found at the dump. He said, the best one was he looked. He was pushing his doze, you know, pushing dirt around and getting it covered

all up and looking at some shiny leather, you know. Good looking purse. So he puts some of the dogs in the uter, and goes out, got to go on through it. Yeah. A little compartment in there just, you know, unzipped it. I've heard this one.

$5,000 in $100 bills brand new. In the dump? Dang. In the purse. That was in the dump? Yeah. Five grand. You know how many of them grinders he bought for?

that? None of them? He fixed all of them son. He sold them. I said, well, you're 5,000 to the good and it didn't cause you nothing. I said, what did you do? The purse he stood away. He got what he needed that up. I don't need a purse.

But, hey. I bet that's an interesting job of pushing stuff around a landfill, seeing what people throw away. I bet someone right now is doing that while listening to this. Probably. And if you are, please tell us what you. And I'm going to tell you what he's got.

What's the most interesting thing you found? I've got a treasure show. He may come hunt it with you. Oh, I'll tell you now. What's the most interesting thing you've ever just found? No, the best thing I've ever, I didn't find it. I actually won it. And the only reason I won it, it was a good-looking young lady that was selling the lottery tickets.

And the only reason I bought it is I wanted to talk to her for a while. What did you win? I want a browning shotgun brand spanking new. He's the... 12-gate. I've never won anything. How many times did you clean it? Huh?

Oh, it's probably not much. Never. I can answer that. Never. Not once. It had a, it had a, it was one of five, a 30-inch full choke barrel. Where is it? That was my house.

Can I have it? In a safe, no. Oh. Nope. That's pretty bad ass. Have you ever found anything? I'm sure it's covered in red. What, found anything cool?

Yeah. I caught my fishing rod one time. But you were fishing for it? No, it was about three days later. I done rode it off. Oh. I caught it. Yeah, I caught it about three days later.

I was like, man, what is this? And I look and I was like, that's my fishing rod. I picked it up, put it back in a boat. That's one on that. We were duck hunting down there. And we're in the cutoff during high water. And a guy, Phil hit a, you know, a bush.

Guy had his gun laying wrong. It hit the bush too, and out out it goes. Oh yeah, I know this one. So he goes, y'all. And Phil said, hey, don't worry about that gun. He said, when the water goes down, I'll come out here and find it for you. Because we tried it, you know, never could find it in high water.

You know, so the water dropped out, you know, Phil, fooling with the magnet. And, you know, you got to think about this. it hit goes down in between some limbs and in between the forks and I mean if you don't just put it exactly right you're never going to get this gun but Phil's he's done that with his nets too much so he's got where he's pretty good at

he kept phoned around that bush where that thing was at and finally heard that click you know it was rusty now it took it took them forever to finally get it oiled up and you know cleaned up probably had to send it to a gunmaker to have him actually get it clean and re-blue but at least he got with his daddy's gun so he didn't want to lose it was it a bush or the boat wrecked yeah huh no that's a different one where he knocked everything no yeah no this was just he hit he hit he hit a he hit a water and hit hit a tree and he didn't have old boy didn't have his gun laying for that either yeah a few things fell out you know

one of them was a shotgun. Yeah. But he actually found it. You know, Jason made the statement one day, we were riding to the blind before daylight. We hit about five bushes on the way in. And Jay said, well, you know, I think it's time that Phil let somebody else drive the boat. And I said, I'm going to let you be the one to tell him that.

Yeah. You worked that out, Jason. Yeah, somebody grabbed Phil and say, you just ride here. Yeah, you worked that out. jays yeah no thing i ain't doing it me neither no i'll run through them button willis all morning let's go well i just step to where i just lay down the bottom of the boat that's what i always do that's it i just laid on the front you're right in the middle and hey when you it's starting okay yep right and if you start filling water and get on the bottom of the boat boys stand up that's right

if it sinks hey stand up and up boys too many honey buns He always blames it on the fat boys Oh yeah He said that's what happens when you boys Can't lay off of honey buns If you can't lay off the honey buns boys You sink boats Well I'm the only man

I know that got blamed for sinking his boat And I wouldn't even there That's right You wasn't even there Yeah I tied it up at the boat house Next thing I knew I didn't sunk his boat So well Okay then

It is what it is Well let's take our last break We'll be back right after this There's a reason you wear kill switches too Yeah, and a weight limit. Because if you end up out of a boat, that boat's going to go in circles. You know what's going to happen then? Somebody going to die.

Yeah. So why do you think it's a good idea if you're controlling it going in a circle? That's a terrible idea. With seven men in it. And full of equipment. Full of decoys. Thousand pounds of decoys. Two thousand pounds of men.

And let's just, I mean, if you were just one man in there, you could have done it. Should have dropped everything off and then come back and get that. That would have been the smart way to go. But typical Phil Robertson. He's in a hurry. Everything's done in a hurry. We're in a rush.

And then we're going to be there. We only have an hour and a half till daylight. And then we're only going to sit there for 45 minutes, at least, in the dark. We only have an hour and a half till daylight on private land. Let's hurry up and get there. That story will go down. He gets a little frustrated with me because I'm the opposite of getting a hurry. My thing is I don't get in a hurry for nothing.

I like exactly five minutes before legal to be set up and ready. Get that little five minute of calm, do whatever, and then let's hunt. I do enjoy my coffee. Yeah. Well, I say I can drink my mountain ops and nothing. I don't drink no coffee. What's in our mail bag? We don't got to wrap.

All right, mailbag. All right. Hey, Jeremiah emailed in like back in April. Was he a bullfrog? Jeremiah. No, but he was worried about talking to. He had some mighty fine line. His girlfriend's dad about getting engaged.

Boom, he took our advice, and now he's engaged. And there's a photo. Is that your dog? There you go. No, that's his dad. Oh, okay. He's engaged. Yeah, we got another one.

We're two for two. Congrats, my man. There you go, son. So he had a bunch of questions about school. I guess we answered it. I don't really remember it. Do you remember it? I think that that's the one he was nervous talked to the dad

because they never had any alone time or she was always there or something. No, no, no. Oh, not that? Oh. Anyway, there are gay. So that's cool. And then what's so weird is this person emailed in like right before we started. And then Stone sang a country song.

And it's Natalie. And she said, has anyone ever noticed Jay Stone's voice sounds like he would make a great country singer? Country Western. Country and Western. Country and Western. But she also emails in. And it's kind of on the theme of today. my husband wants to keep fixing appliances rather than buying new.

Call Jimmy Redd. All right, so she says she loves a podcast. Just drop it off. Drop it off on the side of the road. But red cut loop. 50, 50 chance. Red cut loop, throw it out on side of the road. Jimmy Red to pick it up.

All right, well, she says her husband and I have been married for 18 years, and she truly admires the fact he is a true handyman. They've had their wife. washer and dryer since they got married. That's what's up. And the washer spin cycle is not completely ringing at the closeout. He'll do something to fix it. And a month later, it will do the same thing again.

This is a cycle. Get it? In addition, our refrigerator has stopped working three times in the past year and a half. Each time it stops working, we have to deal with all the work that goes into saving our food until my husband can fix it yet again. I get that my husband would rather fix things than have to buy a new. but enough is enough. Last night, it happened again to the refrigerator and it's getting ridiculous. How can I gently talk my husband into buying new appliances without hurting his feelings or making him mad?

Oh, this one's easy. Just do it. Just buy you a new one. Put it in. Yeah. And then put that one out there in the garage and say, we needed one for drinks. We needed one for bottled water. I was tired of all the bottled water taking up the room in here.

So look, you got your own bottled water fridge out there. Get after it, son. But just do it while he's at work. There you go. Sometimes you got to. Like on this case, I like fixing stuff too, and I hate spending money. Everybody know I'm tight. But in this case, like, three strikes in you out.

Enough is enough. You know. I've tried to fix things and just can't. Yeah. But you know, I don't have this problem. Those old school washers and dryers. Best ones made. You can't tear them up.

That's why there's what that big rush on that one that's called like a speed queen now or something. It's just like the old school that nothing. everything's analog on it, nothing digital. You push buttons and set things and all that now. It's got to own and off. Yeah. Simplicity. Yeah.

But, you know, I enjoy repairing too, but yeah, we're to a point, especially the refrigerator. Like, you know, that's a bad deal there. You need a fridge. You got to have, this day and age, you got to have a fridge. Because if your fridge goes out, I mean, there's a chance. You're losing more money than the fridge costs. If your laundry backs up a week, that ain't a big deal unless there's like 80 years.

y'all you know unless you got a house full of kids or something but but you can go a week without that but a couple of days by the fridge you're in a bind so you just don't want to lose everything buy it for him for a gift don't even tell him happy birthday happy anniversary that's what you do make it his idea that's right you just say hey here's a gift for you what if we moved the one fridge i got tired of watching you work too hard wherever he works on his stuff put the broken refrigerator there and get you a new one for inside and that way he's got one out there where he in his workshop. Martin, you're a genius.

Problem solved. We're just solving problems here today. All right, well, we got another one. This one's a little younger. Ali, 12 years old, just moved to Corpus Christi, Texas. Because of her dad's Navy orders. And she's pretty sure she's the only shy homeschooler on earth. Do you have any ideas to help me make more friends, especially hunting friends?

Plus, do you have any tips for dove season? Apparently there's a lot of doves in Corpus Christi. Oh, yeah. There is. There's a bunch of. I've been there. So that's her request. Watch out for the hurricane.

Basically, she's moved. It sounds like she's moved a lot. Yeah, she's trying to find a new set of hunting buddies. Corpus has got some big hunting stores, hunting and fishing stores. It's a lot more of a fishing community than it is a hunting community. Corpus is cool. You can kill you a lot of redheads. There's a bunch of them that end up down there in the Laguna Madre.

All that kind of stuff. Martin knows so much. I was there last. I was just south of Corpus last year, but you could like see Corpus where we were hunting from. And King Ranch is there so like you can go right around the bay and see a bunch of Neil guy and all kinds of cool things. There's a lot to do down there for an outdoors person. But how does she... It's just got a weird smell.

That old seagrass when it rots. It's just got a weird smell. How does she meet people? He's going to get out there, go to the stores and go to the things. Get out there and do it, you know. I mean, there's people everywhere. Tough. She's probably like, because my dad talks about, I mean, he moved.

He was California. He was born in Germany and his dad was in the Army. So he moved a ton and was shy. Yeah. So he talks about that a lot. Boy, he is making up for lost time now. He is not shy. Huh?

Your dad. Well, but he just still don't like people. Oh, yeah. I know he don't like him. He got a lot of stone. But he still talked to everybody. He does talk to people. Yeah.

He talks to anybody. But yeah, I mean, I appreciate your day. had a serpent in the name. Yeah, and you too. And yeah, that's tough on you. But I think Martin's right, you go to them stores. Just get out there. There'll be stuff.

There's events. Like those places, they celebrate hunting and fishing down there. So just get involved with those events. They'll have kids fishing rodeos. They'll have all kinds of stuff. You'll meet you some good folks to tie in too down there. 100%. Si, any advice on dove, honey?

Kill them all. Lots of shell. Let's drop. Kill them all. Lots of shells. Lots of shells. Lots of shotgun shells. And, hey, about a month before it starts, skit shoot.

To get it going where you be home. It's your lead right. That's right. If you just had your lead right, you can kill them out to 250. That's right. 250 is about as far as you kill one for it. If you got the lead right. 250?

Yeah. Yards? Yeah. No problem. Long as your lead's right. That's right. That's not true. Yeah, it is.

Just ask Si. Hey, just ask me. I will stand 250 yards away from you and let you shoot at me. Really? With a dove shot? I'm going to make you turn around because I don't want to put your eye out, but I will pepper your back behind. Once he gets his lead, right, you're in trouble.

That's right. I will pepper you in your eyes. So do I have to run? No, you can just stand there. You just stand there and take it. Martin, would you be nervous? At Si? Oh, he'd figure you out.

He'd lob it in there. Oh, no, hey. Windage. Kentucky Winded, son. He'd lob it in there. Kentucky Winded. He's getting him when he gets on a roll. Oh, no.

250 yards? Hey. He'd lob it. It ain't going to hurt real bad when it gets to. Venice for Blue Wing Till hunting. There was a flat wind blowing that morning, and I wasn't used to win. It was pretty windy. I missed the first couple.

About 10. No, but then I got on a row. And killed you six and quit. He killed me six in a row. He sure did. I saw it. When my own two hours. How many yards was it?

It was about 20. Oh, these were in your face. They were moving. It's a hot hole. And they were coming in hot. Dubs are hard to shoot. Six or six? No, no.

Look, the best thing about dove hunting is, hey, there is more shots, more shells burnt, more powder burnt on doves than there is anything else. I think one year they published it, it was like five million shotgun shells, and it was less than like 70 doves killed. What? That's not it.

No, no. That's not it. I'm serious. Five million to seven? I'm serious. There was five million shells fired, and there was only a total of 70 dubs kill. So, Allie, for our advice from duck hunting, for every dove you want to kill, you're going to need to buy 71,428 shells. That's our advice.

No, that's why I told her. Practice shooting skeets. for the month before. What are they watching? I just sent it to you. I filmed that this morning. Oh, boy. He filmed what?

Hold on. We got something else here. Okay. What we got? A bledgling dove. Uh-oh. There's, oh, oh, where is that, sir? He's not going to do that's at Willie's house.

Uh-oh. 22. Are we? No. Hets job. Hats'clock. Are we going to have a neighborhood dove-swat? All right.

Let us out of here. All right. Either air rifle, pellet gun, or 22. I don't think any of that's legal, sir. I don't either. Hey, nobody knows about it. You just told the whole world. All right, gang.

Here's the Bible verse for the day. Ephesians 2.10, for we are God's handiwork created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared us in advance for us to do. There you go. There it is. You didn't know that. You was prepared in advance to do good. There it is.

There you go. That's pretty cool. We'll see y'all next time. Hey, here you go, boys. We're out.