Duck Call Room - Si Reveals the Words You Should NEVER Say to Your Wife

Episode Date: August 24, 2021

Uncle Si schools the boys on his VERY scientific findings, including why smoke doesn’t always mean fire. Si also offers insight into how to pass the Army’s PT test. Martin grins his way through the whole episode. Jay Stone says it's safe to make one assumption about the character of anyone wearing a fishing shirt. John-David gets Si's take on turkey bacon. And Si tries to help out a fan who REALLY stepped in it with his wife (and blamed the Duck Call Room boys!) - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Well, look, we're back for another episode of the Duck Call Room. That's right. Welcome to the Duck Call Room podcast. And Cy apparently slept really well last night and half of this morning. No, no. I had, duck, hey, I don't know what's happening. Something's going on in my life. Let's hear about it.

Well, I usually sleep until about 10.30. A.m.? Huh, a. What time do you go to bed? About 9 o'clock. 13 hours. Hey, I normally don't stir. I'm kind of like a barren hibernation.

I normally don't stir till about 10.30. Here lately, though, I've got in. Stones, a bad influence on me. Uh-huh. Because since I've started working out with my cubie on a regular basis. Hey, I was laying there as morning, woke up about six. I looked at the clock, 620, matter of fact. I said, no.

Then I looked again. It was one minute after eight. I said, no, might as well get up. 8.15. Here we go. I'm in the cubby. I had me a four rep of my whole workout, which is a full hour with no breaks in between. It's 40 minutes of pedaling on the cuby, and then six exercises, 30 reps a piece, in between five minutes.

So as far as solid hour, I'm moving. So do you take it off the ground and then use your hands? No, no, I got two. No, no, I got two, three pound weights. Oh, okay. My wife is getting me, I'm going up to six pounds. Uh-oh. Okay.

You got embarrassed Baking all that bass hired here, didn't you? Uh-huh. And about two months, this thing here's going to be. Oh, yeah. Okay, because I ain't stop it. So you're telling him. He's going to start hitting me harder. So what you're telling me?

So when I hit him next time, he's probably going to be just a chair flipping and everything else. So what you're telling me, the more active you get, the better you feel. Oh, yeah. Shocking development. No, no. That's a big revelation. I would have never thought that.

But it's actually true. The more active you get, the better you feel. A full hour and I'm soaking wet. That's the reason, hey, I even took a shower. I don't work that so hard this morning. I took a shower. You would think. We're proud of you.

I wish they could see his tennis years. Oh, yeah. Them are like circa 2013 whenever that Duck Dynasty camouflage was the thing. Oh, they can't. Oh, and look at them legs. Well, if I shaved them, I'd be like a

what was that quarterback? I got some fine. I can literally count the hairs on your leg. I know. There's like 18. That's right. Get rubbed off. So you're bald and started at your ankles

and it's working its way back up. It's heading up. It's having noise. I kid you not. There was like 18. hairs on his flag. Hey, the clothes rub them off. They hadn't got no, what is it?

What is it? Static electricity. No, where it stretches. Elasticity? Yeah, elasticity. There you go. It's gone, so whenever anything rubs it, hey, there ain't nothing there, boys. That's all love it.

That's it. You would think after 24 years of the military, Si would figure out that exercise makes you feel better. Hey, look, 24 years in the military never did. The exercise they had me to do didn't help me a bit. Did you do it?

Hey, look, we run. Oh, he did it. No, no. At Fort Bragg, I was there for five years, you don't walk on Fort Bragg nowhere. You run. It's airborne. Okay.

So, it's four to five miles every day, five days a week. Hey, every time I run the four or five miles, they'd like to kill me. This is five times a week, J.D. For five years. For five years. And look, every time I run it,

I was over about to die. You all reckon them sagrants had nothing to do with you. They ain't got no, hey, they ain't got a good, the Army does not have a good PT program. Okay, trust me. Oh, man. Okay. That's an upgrade, boys.

So what you're saying is you can't outrun a pack of cigarette. No. That's what you're telling them. Well, no, you can't, especially two packs. I hate Two backs That's why I got C OPD Boys

Hey look Secondhand smoke We'll get you Okay That's not First hand I'll tear you up Okay

Second hand Okay Okay Okay A deer told me that One day in Germany In a In a

A high seat Hey look Second hand It gets you But first hand To tear you up Off that boy That's like

Hey In other words Hey The alert on this is Hey Do not smoke them nasty things. They're not good for you.

Oh, no. You're making me cough just thinking about it. Hey, that's what that deer went. Look, I took a drag on and blew it out. The wind was one of them had come in, up, and swirl back down. And when I blew it out, I heard, well, I thought it was a guy that just dropped me off. And I looked, and I said, what are you want? Y'all in his little old spark down there.

He was looking up going. He doesn't got him a drag. off at Winston, they know what to do with it, didn't. Oh, my goodness gracious. All right. What's the one now, boys? I know this. We're going to change a Surgeon General warning on cigarettes.

That's funny. They'll get you. Secondhand, rough. That's right. But first hand, it'll tear you up. It'll tear you up, boys. Oh, man. That's good stuff.

This man said two packs. Right. Well, hey, I did. But the Army's PT program was, oh, I did. It sucks. Hey, Pete Borgive sucks, boy.

Look, hey, if you do something for five years, four, five days a week, it ought not even bother you. You should be good at it. Yeah, yeah, you should be good at it. Yeah, sigh, that goes back to that old deal. You get whatever you put into it. Uh-oh. Hey, I had to put into it. It's eight five miles.

And look, I didn't get nothing out of it. Okay, because I never got in shape to do it. He said, I got nothing, but she didn't. implants out of it. That's all I ever got. I'm sure he was pacing himself somewhat. You think he's at the back of the Oh no, I made them look. When I did the PT, you know, for the for the official thing, you know.

The test. Yeah, you had to pass it. Okay. Did you pass it? Oh, yeah. But I made a math. C plus man. No, no, no, but I made a man. Most people run around, you know, we run around a racetrack, okay, 440. And you had to do it like, what, five times? or four times, whatever a mile is. Four times is a mile. Yeah, okay.

So anyway, you had to do it four times. Well, most of them run the four times. Yeah. What did you do? I done figure it out. I could do it in about what. 18 was passing, and I normally would make my run. I would run three quarters.

It's a two mile run. Yeah, I would run three quarters, walk a quarter. One three quarters, walk a quarter. Y'all, and they screaming at me, you're running. And I said, hey, 18. I've got my time. Okay, I'm going to make it about 16 minutes. I don't worry about it.

I've been there. You sprint the straightaways and walk the curve. Oh, no, no, yeah. And then you're screaming at me the whole time. And I said, hey, you're getting red in the face screaming at me. And trust me when I tell you, it ain't doing you good, no good, and it ain't bothered me a bit. So you might have to give it up. Oh, my goodness.

So you had to run two miles in 18 minutes. No, I run 16. I didn't want to cut it close that close, J.D. 18's passing, but hey, I don't. That's why I said, C-plus, man. Well, I almost, if that was, if 18 was passing when you were in, the standards that went way up since then. Well, I don't remember what it was, but I just knew I had a time frame. Google it, Johnny De, what's the P.T's Army P.T. Army P.T.

Army P.T. A mile, a mile, ain't two miles. But I want to say, we had to do it. Oh, ain't no way of 18-minute miles. Well, hey, whatever it was. Two-mile. Two-mile. Well, that's one.

Mail. No, it should be for the test. No, no. Two miles? It's two. You can walk. No one did it kill me. Yeah.

You could walk. I thought it was bad enough for once. It's on a point system. You can walk a mile in 18 minutes. I don't know how many points you need to pass. Well, I don't know what it was, but anyway, I would like two minutes under. They had different times for different ages. Yeah, the age groups.

Well, what is the fastest mile that they run? Anybody. Yeah, by four minutes? Three minutes and 50 seconds. Well, normal was about six for a mile. Yeah. I don't know that that's normal. So make it, if it was two, it would be 12 minutes.

Yeah. If you're done it, six, you're moving. But if it was two, it would be 12. Okay, you got to get 60 points in each event. Well, whatever. Here we go. I've done that. So 15 minutes and 54 seconds if you are 17 to 21.

What was that? For two miles? Two miles. Eight-minute mile. Eight and a half minute mile. 15.54. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I run three-quartered. Trotty. He's a trotter. Because there ain't no running. He had a nice gait about it.

Yeah. Well, I got long legs. You trot three-quarters and you walk a quarter. He got long legs and a short. You would come in since it was 15 something, eight minutes. I usually, that's probably what, seven and a half is what I ran. How many push-ups did you do? Enough.

Whatever it took. Just the minimum? Enough. Yeah, to pass. That's a lot of. Look, I never, I never, however. No. Unless Big Ophers are.

Then he'd do about a Honda of Big Overs. Well, no, no. I done about 300 that day. In dress greens because Big O'G got kept getting in my face, and every time he would, he would put his nose on my nose, like that right there. and I couldn't help but bust out laughing and he'd say, get out and make it. So what you're saying is you did the bare minimum. I would do enough to pass.

C plus. Why extend yourself energy-wise? But he always showed up. He was always there. And he was always there. So you couldn't fire him. Well, right, look. Why extend yourself?

No. Now look. Side saying, work smarter. No, no, hey, look, if I have to, I've got it in reserve, okay? That's that hump on his back. That's his reserve battery. Right back here. No, what that was was as bad posture when I was growing up.

Yeah. Because I got a little lithium pack right back here. So if you need to get it, I got it. But let's leave it. In case of emergency. Hey, no, the Army did prove that. Guys, your size, okay, and like one on mine, guess who's going to last? guess who's going to last longer, you know, if it comes to it, that you just got to keep going.

Well, I would hope you. No. Me? Yeah. No. No, no. I got a lot of quivered me. Nope, because you got the fat reserve.

Oh, okay. Well, there's a nice way to say in your husky. Yeah. They have proved. The Army has proved that. Okay. You know. Have all the fun?

I will agree with that. That's true. I will agree with that. Well, I wouldn't go that far. I don't know where we're... We don't want to go down that slide, boy. I don't know where we're headed, but I know where we've been. We'll be right back after this.

We're going to take a break. We need one. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means? That means more outside cooking. And y'all know. We love to eat beef around here.

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We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Tritale's beef. I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat. She isn't a big meat, folks.

Yeah. Just go to Tribalienable. beef.com slash that's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. So I got a question for you. Before the break, you were saying that the army proved that fat guys are in better shape than skinny guys. Nope. No, that's in a starvation situation. Nope, that is not what I said.

Oh, okay. So what were you saying? I'm just saying if it comes down like if you had to do, let's say a 50, mile march. I ain't doing a 50 mile march ever. Oh, if somebody's trying to kill you, you'll do it, J.D. Trust me. Okay. But anyway,

you're on a 50 mile march, okay? The ones that are going to hold up the best on it is Big Boy. Okay? Because they've got reserves in the body. I don't... So you're saying 50 miles... No, no, they've

proven that. And look, and look, they give these guys the hardest time. And, look, they give these guys the hardest time. basic. Oh, yeah. Well, yeah. Well, no, no. Well, no.

But, hey. You never seen a full metal jacket? Well, yeah. Well, I'm just saying, okay. I mean, they gave everybody a hard time, but, hey, they was extra hard on the fat boys. Well, right. Yeah. Okay.

Yeah. They was the one that, like, most of them were up, you know, and you got a few stragglers. Yeah. And I was back here with the fat boys. Just do anything. I'm doing my time. So you're saying They last longer.

Okay, because of the reserve they've got in their body. Okay, I'm just saying right now, 50 miles, Stone versus Martin, you're taking Martin? Martin's going, yeah. I'm taking Stone.

I don't believe, if either one of y'all want to go for this. You lose. Let me tell you. Hey, Martin will end up carrying Stone. Because he's going to get out. I ain't going to tow it nowhere. Yeah, you are.

Yeah, you will. You will. That's your buddy. That's your buddy. You'll carry it. Well, I will if it comes down to it. This is a life or death situation. I like to think that nobody's going to be trying to kill us.

Plus another. Other than the 50 miles. The only thing I'm worried about killing me at this moment is in 50 miles. That'll kill me. It's rough. Is there a bicycle involved in this March? What you're talking about is 100% false. But except, now he does have

some merit in the fact that I was that big muscles, big muscles burn a lot of energy really fast. I would like, for instance, I was watching a fight the other day. And one of my favorite fighters of all time, Daniel Cormier was announcing. Well, Daniel Cormier, when he was fighting, he was not in, well, he was in shape, but he was heavy. Yeah. I mean, you would never think this guy is a professional fighter, bodybuilder, well, no, he looked

like a normal guy, and he was heavy. So this guy comes out, he's muscled up, and he's supposed to be, you know, the next best thing, he sent his pockets. And Carmier said, too much muscle. And the other guy that was an answer where they started laughing, he said, why has he got too much muscle? He's going to gas out. Too much muscle.

And look, a minute and a half into that fight, that muscle guy was whipping out of the guy's butt. And guess what happened? The tides turned. He gassed out. And could not do nothing. just took a butt kicking. Well, no, no, that's why I'm telling you, okay.

And you may say it's wrong, but, hey, the army has proven a fat boy is going to last longer than a skinny boy. I think in like a past away. Well, I'm just talking about ongoing. I don't think it, I think it's like if there's no food. Well, I'm just saying, overall. Well, that is that, yeah, that's, if you both have to march 50 miles. I'm without food.

I'm not saying the guy is going to make it long now. He's going to be walking when the other dude did you. Because one time I watched that show naked out. So how far you reckon God one could go? Forever. Like an energizer bunny? Well, no, no. A couple marathons.

He would go further than a skinny guy. I'm just telling you. They have literally have proven that. Nobody's proven. This is a documented thing. This is proven. I'm looking at. Hey, when you get into.

the ones like the Navy SEALs special forces and all that. That's it. They're all fat. Nope. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. Here's what takes over them. Okay.

It's mental. Fine. Much. Because them guys, they don't have no gil in them. Period. No. They're on off switches. Go.

Okay. No. I'm just saying, hey. But that's the, that's one of the, I don't even have the words to describe them. Elite don't do it. Okay, that ain't enough. Because what they pull now,

these people, I'll just say this, hey, they're aliens from another planet. Okay. And if they had a little fat on, they'd really be something. Oh, no. Boy, ain't no telling how good they'd be. That's why they call it a seal.

They got a little blubber. That's what the name seal comes from. Oh, they got more than one. Blubber. Okay. I'm just saying, I don't know. Men don't take so over then.

Okay. Because then boys, I'm telling you, and like what, what amazes me, you would think that they would be, you know, tall or big,

you know, now. They some of them. Most of them are. Some of them are. But I mean, most of them are guys that you wouldn't look twice and say,

oh, that goes to Navy Seal. Yeah, there's a lot of them about size of a Cat squirrel. Yeah. You'll watch him.

Hey, and he'll kill you 14,000 different ways and three seconds flat. I'm so confident. But there's one thing, there's one thing that none of them are. Fat. Fat. Well, no, that's true. That, hey, well, yeah.

I just say. I'm at a lot. Hey, I'm not going to say anymore. But they have proven it. Okay, if you got a little fat reserve, you'll go further. It's I saying on average. Yeah. A average human beings.

A big boy will go further than a skinny boy. I did notice in the Olympics. The Olympics on the marathon. Regular army. A lot of big people. Yeah, a lot of fat people. Running the marathons. And in the speedwalking too.

Yeah. The rowing? Big people in that. Yeah. It was all. The shot put was these tiny people, though. Yeah. It was weird.

I will say, though, I watched Neck and Afraid one time. Or a couple times because it just makes me laugh. And they're trying to survive. You watch that crap. One, a couple times. Willie was trying to get me to go on it. But on survival? Yeah, just surviving.

No. And there was one episode. Naked and afraid. There was one episode with this fat boy. I don't know. I ain't watch yet. Because you got to survive for 21 days. So Willie was wanting you to do that.

Yes. And I was like, probably not. There's got to be a lot of money involved. But there was an episode with a guy. Was your problem naked or afraid? Both. Oh. I was just curious.

I was just curious which one the hang up was on. He's naked. He's naked. Whoever's with him is afraid. But there was this one with a dude who was a big boy. He was probably me and Martin-esque. And you know what his survival technique was for 21 days? Sit there? Sit there.

And because he was a big boy, he had plenty of reserves. The girl that was with him was getting all mad. She was like, you ain't working, you ain't doing nothing. He was like, hey, pace myself. He literally laid down for three weeks and won the show. Marathon, not a sprint. So I'm just saying, in that, if you've got a chance. If the challenge is sitting still and not eating, yes, Martin Overstone.

No. 50-mile march. Maybe. I just don't have, I'm not a sitter. I mean, I'm big, but I'm up. I don't, I sit. go to bed. The rest of the time I'm...

You'd probably be better on neck and afraid at gathering food, though. Yeah, I'd be a gatherer, you know. You'd kill something eventually, too, and eat it. I don't know if I could fashion my own weapon. I mean, I could get me a fishing pole probably, but that'd be about... I'm going to need to be on an island somewhere if I'm going to compete in that thing. You drop me up there, like, on that show alone, up there on the side of a cliff in British Columbia going into winter.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like, don't even drop me off. I'm not surviving a cold weather thing. It's not.

I don't even like going to Arkansas. It's too far north. No, I've tried that building a fire with two sticks and all that jazz. Did you ever get one? No, absolutely not. I give up for it. I was like, but there's a lighter right here. Like, let me see.

I'm at lighter. Hey, you don't really have to have a fire. Oh, boy. Okay, as long as you get smoke. If you can get going enough to have it smoke. I don't want to be. I don't want to be a pork butt. Well, no, no, hey, because I prove that.

I proved that in about, about 18 degrees. You ain't got to have fire. You just need smoke. You can stay warm. You can actually stay warm and dry out. How do you get smoke without fire? Well, hey, where there's smoke, there's fire. No, no, no.

No, people say that. Not necessarily. That's a false assumption or a false statement. Because, hey, I had smoke on, and what it was, it was shotgun shell boxes. that were damp and they would not get catch fire, but they would smoke. I love the fact our producers are sitting over there shaking their head. Well, no, no, look.

Welcome to today. You got to understand. Breaking the fourth wall for you guys. Hey, it's 18 degrees. Okay. Phil makes me drive one of the boats, and this boat is 12 foot long. And you got 700 pounds.

No, no, and he puts me and four or five, I think it's five. He puts me and. five others because he was a, that's when he was running while and drinking. They had the big boat, him and about three men got in it and took off.

I'm guessing you and the fat was coming. The small boat. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Five of us about 250 apiece. So hey, I'm watching one next to every time they step in. So fat boys better in a march. Hey, hold on. Worse than a boat. You don't want them put in a boat. Because hey, I'm watching them step in and by the time

the fifth one stepped in, I've got this much free board tell us about it so look can i ask you a question yeah at that point why did you the captain yeah mind you're the captain you're the captain of the ship you why did you not say i'll come back and get you no no no you're not understanding i ain't captain or nothing i'm a guest were you driving the boat you're yeah but nope there ain't no captain you like that boy oh you like that boy on captain the owners are the renters i should say the renters field robinson and al bow and a couple others that was putting the money out from Moss Lake to hunt duck hunt.

They were under joint. I'm a guess. So, hey, all I was saying, I said, hey, hey, you need to take a couple more with you. They ain't paying no attention. Oh, no. You said they're going to go. Hey, get in the boat. They's a half a fifth into that old crook.

Oh, no, no. But anyway, they said, no, hey, get in the boat, and we got to go because daylight's coming. Well, I figured I was sinking. I didn't want to miss them too, wouldn't it at daylight. Yeah. I thought I'd think it getting through the buck brush because, hey, we've done the buck brush. It was a zigzag pattern all the way out to the lake.

Zicking and tagging. And that's just for game wardens, okay? Make it hard to find the track, you know, to go out. So look, I'm sitting there and I'm mottling there breaking the motor because I've got it just twisted it as hard. I can twist it where it's just barely running. Well, when I hit the open lake, I can't make it stop because it starts picking up speed.

Well, I'm sitting down like this. That's called inertia. Oh, yeah. So I'm sitting here like this and all of a sudden it's like a stampede of cattle. Been there. Okay. Everybody is coming toward me running. Yeah.

And I said, it ain't no good, boys, because hey, we're already going down. Hey, I didn't even get up. Okay. They don't know how deep the lake is. I do. So I'm just, it's. It starts at the ankle. It's pouring in on the ankles.

The ankles are getting cold. It's coming up my body. And, well, when it hit the groin area, it was... You got up, didn't you? No. Oh, no, no. Hey, I never got up. Look, the boat hit the bottom, like that.

I'm sitting there right here. And I was so mad. I just... We're right in front of the blind, Mawlake Blind. Tree blind. I'm sitting out like that. Phil's leaning over. these guys are just trashy and fix it or drowned.

And he's yelling, Stand up, stand up. So they finally listen to him. He said, hey, come on up here, get your guns. Come on up and get out of the blinds. Daylights, get out of the decoys. You know? And he turned to me and I said, hey, what are you on me do?

He said, hey, push that boat back here, a little father. You can do what you want to. So, hey, I'll climb up the ladder. And no charcoal, nothing else. I've got, yeah, since I've smoked, I got a ladder on. me. And it ain't wet. That's where this story's story. Oh, no. So, hey, I'm inside the blind.

I'm inside the blind. Okay. I don't found it. Got one. It's fired up a little bit. Just got, and then I started piling them, you know, and it ain't nothing but smoke. Four hours later. Smoke, mind you. No fire. No fire.

Just smoke. Okay. Just smoke. Four hours later, I finally go out there and load my shotgun and kill a few dogs. But I'm dry. So you can't. get dry by just smoke alone. You had a good bark on you too, didn't you? Oh, yeah.

Oh, no, if you'd have ate me, hey, I'd have had a good smoke for it. Oh, Lord. Well, let's take a break. We're going to smoke our way out of this one, too. We'll be right back after. I just like the fact that... Don't get into it, boys. There's a belief.

A belief what? That smoke doesn't mean fire. Well, it don't. You ever heard that saying, say, inside? there's smoke there's fire i've heard that but hey that's a false that's a false statement because just because they got smoke does not mean there's going to be a fire i'm just interested in what google has to say if you google what causes smoke that's what causes smoke i'm just curious in the answer i don't know but i i'm legit say hey what caused is smoke oh what i imagine the

answer is going to be fake fire i thought you said that was false siry what causes smoke Hey. Smoke occurs when there is incomplete combustion. Uh-oh. Incomplete combustion. Fire is a combustion. To burn the fuel completely. Oh, hey.

Yeah. Burn the fuel completely. Technically. And I told y'all, you could not, it was not combustible. Okay. It's getting there. It's close, but it won't flame up. Okay.

So in a technical, technical deal, I am correct when I said. Well, smoke does not be fire. Okay, so at the last 30 minutes, we've learned two things. That's right. Smoking kills. We've learned the fatter you are, the better shape you're in. Hey, it's like the, the fatter you are, the further you can go. And smoke don't mean nothing.

That's right. Also, secondhand smoke, it'll hurt you. That's right. First thing, tear you up. Tare you up. Brought to you by the duck call room. That's it. I can see the cover photo of this episode now is Sigh and Smokey the Bear.

I like that. Only you. Only you can prevent forest fire. It's a lot of pressure to put on a kid. Oh, man. But if you see smoke, don't worry about it. Yeah, it'd be all right. Whatever you do, don't go put out the fire.

Technically, I am correct when I said. Just because you had the statement about where there's smoke, there's fire, that's an incorrect statement. But my question is, so if there is no fire, and look, I'm not saying you're wrong. But what I am saying is coming out the end of that lighter was a flame. Now, I did start it with a fire. Okay. Okay. I did have fire to actually make the process begin.

So therefore, I mean. Yeah, but hey, there was no smoke. There was no smoke when the fire came out. Okay, it was just fire. Okay, the smoke one occurred when I put it on a damp piece of paper, okay?

And the damp piece of paper would not combust. It did combust. No, it did. It was incomplete. It was incomplete combustion. We've looked at it up. It started on the road to combust.

Side of moving science. But it didn't occur. So all occurred was smoke. I love it. Man, I love you. I love the fact that you'll stick to your guns I ain't want to pull them out boys I love it I mean I put them up boys

I'm gonna fire off the ground I just want to say most most of the time in here somebody's with you Black Panthers I got your back A lot of stuff I got your back on This one Hey you got it here you're on your own

No no I'm like the Long Ranger Okay I don't mind going it alone Yeah okay I do like a lot the Tonto to ride with me every once in a while, okay? But normally I will be your Tonto. But if I had to go alone, Tonto may show up later and he may not. All you need you white horse, ain't it?

That's it. All I need is Silver Boy. Hi, yo! And you know who silver is. Philip McMillan. Go give me some ice. The fat boy himself. Philip Macmillan is silver, son.

Yeah, Mule. I said, Hey, yo. Oh, you make my life better. I don't know. Hey, look. It's all about fun, boys.

I agree. That's it. I agree. Man, my cheeks hurt. I've been smiling this whole episode. That's because you found out you can run so far. I know. I know how good of shape here again.

I can, I can, um, I can. I can confirm that that statement is not true. When the world comes to an end, Martin's going to be the last man standing, boys. No, he ain't either. Martin going to snuff himself out if he sees that coming.

I'm going to tell you it. I ain't waiting. I'm going out. Martin ain't waiting in that line for Jesus, son. We're going to get to, we're going to go. We're out. But I'll cook for everybody. I'll get me some smoke rolling.

Of course, every time I've ever lit that smoker, I do see a flame. You know, what do I know? How's it worth? I don't really know. Hey, no, no, since you brought up food of it, stone out of anybody, since he uses the trash can and smokes everything, should know you don't have to have fire. None of that on fire is, it's no.

There's never been a fire. It starts out with a fire, but it turns into smoke, and it does everything a real good flavor. Okay. There's still fire. I'm still going to smoke. Here's what I tell you I've learned about, it don't matter how you start,

it's how you finish, son. That's where he's at. He don't care how I start. I just know how you finish. That's all he's worried about. He's going Nick Sabin on us on that deal. I don't care how you start. It's how you finish, boys.

I've got all I need, Silver's still with me, boys. Tonto's out on this one. Tonto might not make this episode, but hey, silver's always with me. Oh, man, I love it. Golly. I need more of this.

I know. Do you have any other unpopular opinions? All everything I say is unpopular. Except for what a sidekick, cool, people. I will take this moment. Look, while we're just sitting here in all, if you're new to the channel, YouTube.com slash duck call room, all one word. Be sure you like and subscribe.

This is it every week. If you're new, welcome. This is us. And hope you're, enjoyed it? And make sure you leave us a rating interview on your favorite podcast app, whether it be Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen to your podcast. That way, your friends and all that can find us.

So it is, God, I ain't laugh as hard. Man, I could have used this during quarantine, I assure you that. A birthday party. Oh, all right, Jay. Who's had a birthday? Do we have any weird news? Yes. Let's get on a weird news article.

I got to show them a video, though. So I need to show it to them in the next break. Oh, okay. Show Si? I got to show Cy this. It's kind of a long video. It's insane. Okay.

Yeah, I'd like to see it. Well, I do want to tell Cy this. Cy, you know what I did yesterday? Because you know what's coming up. No. Oh, yeah. This is what's coming up. Yeah.

Doves. So what did you? Yesterday I banded some dubs. So. Well, good, good. Hey, I got a good question. How many? How many did you ban?

Yesterday, we banned it about 20 of them. About 20 of them. About 20? Uh-huh. Well, how many did you have total? What's that? Dubs. Dubs?

I think we had seven or eight recapture, so about 28 total. Hey, well, good grief. Hey, hold on to them, son. Wait the Duff season open. No, I let them go. Look, and some of them. Some of them. Look, if you could have saved them and waited the Duff season open and then let them go and I got to shout them.

Well, here's the deal. Look, there's some of them flying around with $100 bills attached to their ankle. Allegedly. Allegedly? Allegedly. Allegedly. Okay. No, I think that's true.

Allegedly. Yeah. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. Is, are you good enough, okay, to, number one, to spot the little glow when he flies by, shine, a little glimpse of a shine.

And then good enough then to pop him and kill him. So I did some of them just for you, sir. Well, hi. So. Well, I got. That's one of the hardest things today to find is a decent dove hunt. It is. Illegal.

A legal. A legal. A legal. Decent dove hunt. Yeah. Because, hey, what normally happens is they're everywhere. Because, hey, I'm going down the fields land. They're getting up off the road everywhere.

Sitting in trees everywhere. Sitting on the high lines everywhere. It's always Friday, it's a little cold front moves too. He's right. They're gone. I don't know how many times that first Friday in September, it drops 20 degrees. Yeah. like.

Just so all the doves leave. Even though I will say that one day that me and you hunted together, that was the hottest day I have ever dove hunted. That. Yeah. That. We shouldn't have not even gone. That was hot. Hey, that was stroke.

Yeah. That was hot. No, I'm serious. That was stroke weather. That was hot. But anyway. I was taking. So you're going to show him a video?

And I was taking a sip of water and he made me laugh and I almost drowned. Well, let's take another break. Well, wait a minute. Can I read the headline before? Read the headline. Read the headline. Birthday party guest jumps on an alligator's back after it bit the trainer and wouldn't let go. I'm going to show the video. That does not seem smart.

And we'll be back. No, no, no. I just got a question. Okay. Lots of questions. Why did he jump on the gator's back instead of helping the guy get the darn alligator off? We'll watch the video and we'll be back. I think that's what he was doing.

All right. All right. So we have seen. the video, birthday party at a petting zoo, the trainer goes to feed the alligator, probably some chicken, grabs.

Alligator misses, grabs her arm. She said at that point, you can either go in there with the alligator or get your arm ripped off. She goes in there with him. This guy starts screaming, we need help, and then he realizes,

I am the help. So Donnie jumps in, gets on the alligator's back to keep it from rolling, because once them alligators get the hole thing, They start rolling, rip her arm off. It was pretty incredible watching that. Now, the trainer, the lady, she had the presence of mine to get in there, like you said,

it's either get in close or have your arm ripped off. She pulled guard on that gator. What I mean about, she wrapped her legs around his neck and closed her feet. So she had some control over that gator spinning just by doing that. and then Donnie, I promise you, one or both of these humans trained Jiu-Jitsu because he jumped on that gator's back. To keep him too from rolling. And between her pulling guard and him on that gator's back,

that gator could not roll, which saved her arm. That gator rolls one time that arm is done. Oh, yeah, it'd be gone. Here's the crazy thing. I've seen a lot of people that grew up watching Steve Irwin jump on them gators back and crocodiles back. And they thought, well, I can do that too. It almost never turns out well for them.

Like that old man in Florida that did it got his tail tore off, that was not a good one. Alligator was in his ditch. So Donnie, I noticed Donnie had on a fishing shirt, though, so I ain't so sure Donnie was from Utah. Donnie might not have been from Utah. I said, I think I've done this before. So, Donnie, that was actually, that's, pretty cool, Donnie. Good on you for helping the

trainer out. The crazy part of the video she gets her hand out of there and then she gets out. Well, Donnie's sitting on an eight-foot, eight-and-a-half-foot alligator. Now what? Now what? And the alligator's name is Darth Gator. Yeah, and this show ain't over

until he gets free of that gator and out of reach. I know something by both of them, especially Donnie. He stayed calm in a very bad situation. which tells me he's either got some military background or he trains jiu-jitsu, one of the other, or both. Yeah, because that, well, and whenever they're stuck waiting for the alligator to let go,

they're like, hey, what's your name? Yeah, I'm Lindsay. I'm Lindsay. Hey, Donnie. Hey, Donnie. Don, good to meet you. I wish it was better circumstances. That's pretty slick.

That's impressive. I wish the gator was bigger than eight and a half foot because I think a gator named Darth Gator needs to be like 11. minimum but I mean he is in Utah so he's definitely the biggest lizard in Utah so I feel confident in that in that statement that was pretty awesome video yeah that was cool as hey that's what happens oh humans help each other that was an article fight or flight donnie said I'm fighting you know that's good Johnny D would you have jumped out pretty wild I don't know when you think about it pretty wild it is very unselfish of Donnie to help her out to help her out help her out. Yeah, because she's the professional.

Yep. Donnie's just, Donnie paid for that. Donnie paid to get to ride that out. I really hope. The good folks of the Petten Zoo gave Donnie like some. He got his money. A free voucher or something. Like next weekend getting free.

Yeah. But my man Dan sent that email in and wanted us to discuss it. He sent the article in an email. I saw it this morning. I was like, that, that is something. I wish we could have watched the whole video, but there's rules about that. Thank you, Dan, because I would have never found that because it was on CNN.com. Yeah, Dan.

I'd never seen that. So, good on you, Dan. Here's what I got out of this. There are heroes everywhere. And they don't all wear capes. That's right. Some of them wear fishing shirts. Some of them wear fishing shirts.

Most of them wear fishing shirts, probably. If you're wearing a fishing shirt, there's a pretty good chance you're a decent human. I like the way he thinks. I really did it. that's good stuff. I'm not saying he's wrong. No, no, I'm saying. I like where he takes. That's a good deal there. I know for a fact. You got any more weird news?

That was the one I had today. Because it was just so insane. But, you know. Well, that's fine. We can take a break and we'll come back and get in the hello at duck call room.com inbox and check out what the fans are saying. I do have some life advice. People need life advice every day. Dear silence. And I have a picture of a Black Panther.

Uh-oh. 100%. I'm going to run the bell on that. All right. We'll be back after this for more things that don't exist other than in zoos. That's right. Except in petting zoos. Well, let's roll on into that hello at dot callroom.com inbox.

Look, if you haven't already, send us a message, send us whatever's on your mind, if you've got advice you need, if you got a favorite scripture, if you got trail cam pictures, if you got sandwich pictures, if you're just an overall good person who likes wearing fishing shirts, the stone likes to say, shoot us an email. Tell us a story. Tell us that duck callroom. R. Johnny D. What's in there? Oh, send us the smoke signal. Do y'all want the Black Panther first or last?

Ah, whatever. Whatever. Let's get it over with. Get it over with. Get it over with? Pull the Band-Aid off. All right, here it is. Let's don't spend too much time on it.

No, we won't. But Kenneth, you've said if there was a real Black Panther, they would have killed it. That's right. Well, he shot the big black cat. Yeah. There you go. That's proof fair. Where's that at?

He didn't say. Of course he didn't. But it's at Turner Bros. Taxidermy. Here's what I've got to ask. It died at the zoo. Yeah. There's no noticeable bullet hole in it. Well, right, here's the thing.

My question is, what does that creature weigh? I got a better question. Why is there a drawer on the front of that table if it's meant for taking pictures? And not only that, it is a giant drawer. And how far is that human? behind me. Standing behind that. All right.

Detectives, it's a small cat. He just stood really far back to get the picture. And stood in front of attacks. It's a small cat. Yeah. So this was camera trickery. This was camera trickery.

He stood very far back. There we go. We got caught. Si, that is sweet pee. Well, no, no, I'm just saying. That's sweet pee. But it made me laugh. Kenneth, thanks for sending it.

I thought I could pass it out. The devil, look, here's what I'll tell you about photos, the devil in the detail. Anytime that drawer looks to be four foot by three foot, something's up. We got it, we got an issue. Hey, this is

detective squire. That's like, you know, that big cat, I got a picture of my trail can that log, a normal human would think that that's a big log. In all actuality, that log is stick. Yeah, like this, yeah.

Yeah. No, we've proven it. All right. Derek from Stratford, Missouri. Derek, my man. I like this guy, but he pulled a Robertson. Uh-oh. Oh, boy.

And I'm just going to read you the email. He assessing blame? He, he, uh, he. No, it's not assessing blame. The subject line is. The Robertsons are good at transferring. Oh, transfering the blame. I'm in the dog house.

Uh-oh. He recently told his wife how his mom would make homemade blackberry Cobbler and how good it was. To my surprise, she makes Blackberry Cobbler. I was like, oh, that's awesome. Uh-oh. She made it. Uh-oh. Not as good as it. It ain't mama. I told her it was very good, but

I told her how my mom would make the crust different and make the pie filling from scratch. He ain't eating that again. And not from a can. I'm with you. She got very mad at that. Oh. And I told her, critiquing food is something that should be done. And that we, the duck call room all critique food that we eat to make it better.

Her reply is maybe she should, that he should move in with one of us. I got one thing to say. I got one thing to say, if you're married to Miss Kay, then that's okay. You can do that. But if you're not married to Miss Kay,

do not talk bad about your woman's cooking. Or she'll never cook for you again. It's true. He won't ever eat that cobbler again. I bet he ended up wearing it. Guaranteed. Well, he doesn't, he's wondering if he can stay with us for the next couple weeks. Oh, man.

No, Hammer, because you might critique my food. Get out. You ain't coming around me. You got anything there? Well, what I'm saying, what is said there is true. Okay, look, if you don't critique your food that's prepared for you. So I here's what. Okay, if it's bad, here's the deal.

To be fair, she used canned back food. And you eat it and don't say nothing about it. Fresh. What you're going to get the rest of your life? Bad food. Fresh blackberries are going to be better than the can. And so I would have, I think he should have said something. I would have had to, I need to know how the delivery was.

And never say, well, my mom. Never, those words can't ever be said. Presentation is everything. Never say, but my mom. Oh, the delivery. He delivered his message. Poorly. I'm going to, I'm going to go to scripture on this one.

Okay, okay. Well, hey, I'll buy that. But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who ask you to give the reason for the hope that you have. Do you know how it ends? But do so with gentleness and respect. That can be transferred to a lot of different places. Gentleness.

He said my mom. But you don't, you know what the, you know what your wife never considers gentle? and respectful, my mom did it like this. Never. And they know they married mama's boys for the most part. But you don't ever start, well, my mom, you should have said, hey, what about next time if we make the dough together? Yeah.

That's how you get around that, D-Rop. Not like, man, my mom didn't use canned stuff. No, no, look, I just said it was a bad, bad presentation. Gentleness and respect. His delivery was bad. There you go. But I'm saying the theory behind. this, okay, what you're going for?

Principal, solid. I'm with you. Presentation, a zero. His mom's was better, but you can't say it like that. He's just one of those. Here's the thing. He's got to learn the hard way. Okay, yeah, he's done.

Yeah, when he has cobbler in eight years, he'll think it differently. Well, and apparently he's homeless. Talk about his woman. The first thing it probably entered the lady's head when he was saying this was not, hey, you dummy, I ain't your mom. Thank you. I figured it would have been your mama jokes.

No, no, no, I ain't a mama joke. All right, here's a weird one. We got time for one more. This one's short. Perfect. Roman. Is it sweet? From Vesalia, California.

What does Uncle Si think about turkey bacon? It's turkey. It ain't bacon, moving on. Yeah, dumb question. That's gross. Hey, unless you... Don't mix stuff. Okay.

It's either bacon from a big. Okay. Don't make a conglomerate, you know. Hey, a turkey is a turkey. It ain't baking. It ain't baking. Don't you be bringing your conglomerate turkey bacon. Don't be mixing stuff.

It ain't spam. Yeah, okay. We're not talking about baloney here, okay. Have y'all had a smoke? Ever had a smoke baloney? Absolutely. Man, that's good. No, no.

Big old logs. I like, hey, look, you got to buy a special type or it's no good. It won't. A special type. Bologna? Yeah. You got to buy a special type of bologna. Or it will not absorb the smoke.

No, it's good. He knows a lot about smoke. A whole bologna. He knows every type of smoke. It'll take fire, but it won't take smoke. Don't be put no fire on it. Well, hey, it won't smoke. Good grief.

Hey, somebody will not absorb smoke. I guess I is correct, though, because, like, he blows smoke all the time, and I don't ever see a lick of fire coming out of him. So, you know, whatever. technically I am correct There you go I'm the smokeblower Who's got the Bible verse?

What are we closing? I got us one I got the one of ones for today Hey that was a good one Yeah yeah That one is important to remember For sure And that was perfect

What you used it for That's hey And you know what's funny That's what the verse was about Having an answer for a situation Good night Martin That'll preach Hey, there you go.

This one will two. Psalms 104. 31 and 32. May the glory of the Lord endure forever. May the Lord rejoice in his works. He who looks at the earth and it trembles, who touches the mountains and they smoke. Hmm.

We started this thing off with smoke and hay. I love it. We're the ended it with smoke, boys. So you don't need fire, but you need the touch of God. to make smoke back. Amen. I will agree with that.

Amen. That'll get it every time. All right. We'll see y'all next time. I'm right here in the talk room. We're out. That's falling.