Duck Call Room - Uncle Si Almost Got KICKED OFF of a Plane!

Episode Date: December 1, 2022

Si is hopelessly misunderstood by the bougie people in first class, and it nearly leaves him riding the bus instead. Si and Phillip teach everyone the dos and don'ts of navigating airports and riding on airplanes, including Si's rule about when you should run in the airport. Martin and John-David lose it when Philip tells them about Si's many adventures trying to find and keep wheelchairs. Si has thoughts on airplane manspreading. Martin can't believe how volcanic one of his twins' diaper mess was, but he has a GREAT solution to bring some relief after Si's four-day food poisoning mess. John-David is still trying to recruit everyone to the Bidet Way. And the boys encourage a 15-year-old boy living with erythropoietic protoporphyria (EPP) who wonders, "Why did God make me this way?" - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I don't even want to talk about football. Well, we want that. It's so gross. It is. Everybody that could have lost, lost. LSU, fraud. Didn't show up. Fraud.

Tennessee, fraud. Yeah. Didn't show up. Exposure week, boys. It happens. And what really stinks is Academy. They offered me tickets to the SEC Championship, right? LSU, Georgia.

I'm like, yeah, man. That'd be fun. Oh, yeah, I got kids. One. And then B, after LSU had that performance against A&M, I text them, I said, No, bro, I'm good. I don't need to go eight hours from here to watch that buck whooping. Yeah, it could be bad.

No, it's going to be bad. So I said if LSU shows up, they could win. No, they're terrible. They're who we thought they were. They finally showed their true colors. Yeah, what you saw Saturday night was a team that had been over. achieving all year, remember who they were, and a team that had been underachieving all year, remember who they were.

Yep. And what happens in that case is Texas A&M wins by 20. And you got you by whooped them. Yep. But them stupid Aggies. Sorry Aggie fans. Aggies. Aggies.

What isn't Aggies? I don't know. But they all ran on the field when there was still a time out left, and then they had to run off the field that made me laugh. Yeah. And I saw one kid get decked by what can I only assume was a 300-pound ground? grown man. That's fantastic. And football pads.

Oh, good for him. Good for him. What is the deal with charging the field now? It's a bunch of teams that ain't one in a while that finally win. It happens too much. It's too much now. And it's a big deal. And I guess they try to see just how high they can get the fine from the NCAA.

What's it up to now? What, 250? Yowsers. 250 gur? That check would bounce, sir. Yeah. $150. Okay.

250 gur. Yeah, I don't get that. Like when Tennessee did it, it made sense. Yeah, they beat Alabama for the first time this millennium. Undefeated team. Yeah, that's cool. Best team in the country. That's when you tear up something.

Tear something up. Then they get beat by pity. Something's going to get tore up. Yeah. But when you're 5 and 7 and you accidentally beat somebody that's probably not that good either. Yeah, there's been chronically overachieving. What are we doing A&M fans? Agies.

Aggies. I need, if you're an Aggie and you're listening to it, can you explain to us, what is an Aggie? Agriculture. person that okay yeah then why not be the farmers okay they're the agis a Texas A&M farmers like what is an aggie I just don't understand and it's pure a sense and aggie is a good question

is someone from the farm okay Aggie is someone from the farm there it is School of Agriculture that's bizarre I don't know what a constant tide is either I do know what that is when the you know the tide comes in all the

are dead already and it's all red so that's what Alabama's into killing fish dad are elephants yeah which again doesn't an Auburn war eagle but they're tiger and say tell it tell morning about the war eagle oh no I told them I was that I was that and I said hey I hear y'all got the coolest thing I said y'all turn some stupid bird loose and he flies around a couple of times y'all when I said stupid bird they said war eagle y'all So I said, and he lands on the 50-yard line. I said, hey, you need to kill that sucker. And there was just a boo like you ain't heard lately.

I mean, the whole stadium comes to live. I said, settle down. Settle down. Let me explain why you got to kill that one. I said, because right now he's confusing the running back. They don't know. Hey, they run the 50-yard line. I said, hey, you train this other one to land in the end zone?

that way you're running back know where they got to go. They still booed me. They still booed them. I will say about Auburn, the interesting thing about I know we're not a sports podcast. We can be.

We don't really have any rules or... We don't specialize in anything. But I saw where their interim head coach. Cadillac, baby. They had like 12 players baptized. He would. Something like that. Hire that man.

Well, hey, good for him. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. Hire that man. That's it, boy. Like, that's winning. I don't care who you. If you get 12 kids, that age, yeah, I'm calling them kids.

They're 19 year old. I don't care if you do pay them $100,000. Yeah. N. They're still a kid. Whatever, they're still a kid. That's that. If he can convert 12 of them and take them to the baptistry or how every many it was,

it was, it's 12, 7 something. I saw some conflicting report. greater than one. One would be fantastic. But give that man a job because he's obviously a leader. He is a leader of men. Influential.

Give him a chance for crying out loud. Plus, I bet you can get him kind of cheap. Like, y'all been in a financial bind over, y'all had to pay some pretty big payout. Ever since they stopped paying Cam Newton. Yeah.

Oh. Whoa. That's not illegal anymore. It's a bon jo. Them and the Panthers. But no man, I just thought that was the coolest thing that a headline coming from a college football play or college football press conference was how many men that Cadillac Williams had been baptized under his leadership. I can appreciate that immensely. Have you seen all of his press conference?

Every time they play, I don't care about the game. But I'm like, I want to watch Cadillac Williams press conference because this is good stuff. Yeah. And the crazy thing is he could still outrun half his. team. Probably. Like, it's wild. Watching him run down the sidelines when they score or something, I'm like, he still got it. Like, Cadillac State

he in the gym too. So that's, and his name, Cadillat. Come on now. Wasn't it him and Ronnie Brown that ran the Wildcat? Yeah, that was just fun. Yeah. He deserves whatever he wants. Oh, yeah. I can appreciate what the man did down there with the

situation he was handed. So, Cadillac, if you're listening. Oh, he's listening. I got to go We broke, boys. We appreciate you. Nick Saban, if you're listening. Saban ain't ever said nothing about baptizing nobody. Nope.

The only thing he said was you should have seen the other guy. War Eagle. Yeah, he got took out by a shoulder pad and started bleeding. They thought the whole world was in. I did not watch a liggo football last week. When you got twins, you watch a lot of football. You watch a lot of them? And they're eight and six, or eight and eight, I guess, because they're twins,

you will not watch any. You will just build Legos all day. That's fine. I'm cool with that too. All you're going to do. In the background, you'll watch it. Yeah, listen to it. Listen to the distraction.

Yeah, it was, I don't know. But I can appreciate what he's doing down there. So you don't get many news headlines that talk about a man baptizing as college football players. I like that. That's cool. Cadillac. Yeah. But you're welcome here anytime, Cadillac.

Come on. Cadillac home, boy. We got to have Auburn fans that know somebody that knows somebody. Crap, isn't Sadie an Auburn fan? Like, she can't find somebody down there? Christian? Excellent. You just on his pocket.

Call in your favor. You did him one. Now call it. Yours is mildly bigger. Christian should have Cadillac Williams on his podcast. There you go. There you go. And we'll all just go sit here.

Yeah. And then we'll all have a... Or maybe they can do it here. Yeah. We'll have a foot race afterwards. Yeah. Oh, I ain't doing that. There ain't no reason to pull something.

They can get beat. Well, we're all competing for third. Oh, no. I'm not. No. As far as I'm concerned... Mark that I ain't. compete as far as I'm sorry,

sigh can beat me. I ain't, I ain't trying to raise nobody. Sa, when was the last time you ran? My money's on John David in this group right here. Hunter,

if he races. You see me running. Get your gun ready to shoot what's chasing me. When was the last time you ran? That's what I'm talking about. It had to be from a snake. Right.

That's it, probably. It had to be. Hey, I've been running with him for 10 years. I have never seen him, I have never seen him run from anything. Do you ever run in the airport

to catch a flight? Nope. Just wondering. Nope. Willie had a rule in airports that was we don't run. Just because I don't know why. Oh, because I can tell you, because me and him did one time. And we still didn't make it.

Then we were just out of breath and ridiculous. And everybody's laughing at all. And I have adopted the same rule. Don't run. Don't run. And no use of running. No reason and running. Yeah.

Because you ain't going to make it. If you're to the point in an airport where you have to run, you've already missed it. Yeah, you missed the flight. Just go ahead and walk around. over a ticket counter, so yeah, when's the next one? I left Willie one time and did a slight jog. I wasn't like full out sprint. If I would have, I would have made it.

Yeah. Maybe. But I was looking at the plane. Yeah. And they're like, sorry, doors closed. That's what we did. It was in Memphis. And I never forget it.

I don't think I like you anymore. That's why we sent Stone. No, that was in doubt. No, Houston. Yeah. We were in Houston. Me and Sy got off the plane and Stone said, I ain't waiting for y'all. He just took off running.

He made the plane. But when we got to the gate... It was at the gate. I was walking through to go get on the plant. And that lady said, where are you going? I said, I'm going to go get on the plane. She said, oh, no, it's done left the gate. I said, you're a bald-faced liar.

I've got a man standing on the phone right now talking to my buddy saying, hey, y'all come on and get on the plane. He was FaceTime, and he said, nope, the door is still open, Philip. I said, the door is still open, ma'am. Well, y'all can't go down there. Classic. That was United. That doesn't sound very united.

Oh, no, yeah, it wasn't United. It was disgruntled before, so I got through with them. And I told my 5,000 fans, Five million. Don't fly United. They suck. He said, he told us. He doesn't got red in the face about it, boys.

I got mad because it was stupidity. How you really think? Sitting there lying me to my face, and I'm saying, hey, look at this picture. That's a friend. am I standing at the gate saying, come on. I see, you know what I just heard out of this story? Don't stand stone to get to play.

Yeah, I'm just saying. I've been the guy to get to play. Oh, yeah. You stop and tie your shoes, then you drop something. And you keep one foot on, one foot off, say, oh, ma'am, I just, man, yeah, this is my first time. Like, I just don't. Oh, there's my friends. I'm good now.

Oh, yeah, now I can do it. Somebody's coming. Oh, okay, cool. All right, yeah, we're fine. I feel more comfortable now with America's favorite uncle on board. We were right behind him. You know what? I think I'm over.

anxiety meds just kicked in. Let's get on a plane. That's right. Chill. Right. Give me a pale to chill. So, sigh, if we travel together, trust me, if I have to go get the plane, I'll have one foot on, one foot off. Don't worry about.

Yeah. But as soon as you round the corner, I'm going to my seat. I'm going to be sitting behind you anywhere. Back in the back. Yeah. Put me back here by the turlet. Oh, worse seat. I've sat there often.

Yeah. I've sat there a lot. Because if I'm going to be in the back, I'd just soon be a little. all the way back. Generally, people try to avoid that seats. Sometimes you look out and get a whole road to yourself. The last time we flew, Sae almost got us kicked off the plane.

That sounds about right. I need to hear this. Is it a good story? It's a good story. Oh, well, good. Tell it when we get back. Let's take our first break. We'll be right back.

All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means? That means more outside cooking. And y'all know. We love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Trial's beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good?

It's so good. Our friend, Sao Robertson would say, buy on the grill! Look, before we got Tritels, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know

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Just go to tribeef.com slash. That's tribeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. How did Sae almost get y'all booted from an airplane? I hope it all of snoring. Okay, y'all all know that you can't give Cy headphones and let him listen to music because he's going to sing at the top of his lungs. It's one of my favorite things about traveling with him. Hey, he don't care.

He's going to sing. That's a good thing. I know, and it's great Instagram story content, so do not stop him from doing it. Unless you're sitting right next to him. Well, if he sees me laughing, it gets louder because I'm trying to avoid him then. So look, they separate us. He's in the first class up there, and I'm sitting just behind the first class because I'm carrying all of his stuff like a mule, pack mule.

So anyway, Sa is listening to the music, singing and singing, and his foot starts bouncing, and he's shaking and dancing. I got the drum going, boy. So I see this lady, she is visually shaking. And she turns around and looks at Saa, and he ain't looking at her, and she's like, holding their hands up, like, what's up? So she turns back around.

That's what happens when you ride with him first class people. So then I feel obligated to go tell Saa. Some people just don't belong, sir. Trying to get his attention. I'm like, sigh, sigh, sigh. But he ain't stopping, and he gets louder. No, no. His foot starts stomping.

He said, hey, you're shaking her chair. And, hey, I just, I looked and I said, I ain't shaking her chair. I ain't touching her chair. You're shaking the whole airplane. He's shaking the whole airplane. Yeah. So, hey, when she looked at me and all that, I said, he got louder. So now he's boom, boom, boom, boom.

So look, she hits that button up here. Yeah. Yeah. Here comes. Here comes. Are you in the air? Yeah. We're flying.

And the flight attendant comes, and she's like, this little gentleman behind me is disturbing. She just mad you spilled her white claw. That's all was going on there. Hey. Hey, but hey, that woman looked at me. I'm just singing and listening to the music. She ain't said, does it.

Turn around and walked away. The flight attendant. We were fixing to have a confrontation. Confident. Yeah. It was going to be so bad he left all out of. He's going to. I was going to tell him, hey, I got earmuffs on.

It's got music on, and hey, I am in the mood. So, hey, get out of my face. I'm glad you didn't lead with you were in the mood. That probably would have got you kicked off. Well, we ended up staying on the plane, but I thought we was going to get thrown off. I'm telling you. And I couldn't do anything about it. But, I mean, they're going to come.

A lot harder once you're in the air. They're going to zip tie his hands behind his back. I got my rights, too. I got my rights too. Magical. This little seat I'm in is my domain. No, I ain't giving it up, buddy. That lady spent that money on first class thinking I'm going to get away from all of them, Ye-hoo.

Nope. Nope. The biggest Yehu. Nope. The biggest Yehu that ever rode, I'm assuming, American airline. Yeah. And the other thing is, you don't want to be in front of the side or behind him on the airplane because as soon as the tires get, the wheels get off of the ground. He hits that seat and it just all the way back.

I'm talking about, hey, as soon as it does this. Yeah, just a little dip. Yeah, the problem with the seats going back, if everybody in a straight line don't do it, somebody's miserable. But it needs to be like the wave. Like if the first person does it. All of you do it.

Let's all get back. So there's two upset people, the front and the back of sigh. Teach him boozy people in first classes. decide to live. Well, no, no. Hey, I got my space, you got yours. Yeah.

Stay in yours. I'll stay in your. You don't like it? Get back here on that exit. Hey. And bring me a hot towel. Hey, if not, fly economy. Rubbing it.

Get out of here where you don't belong. That's right. You don't belong up here. If you can't handle a little music in a good time. Good grief. That's great. Oh, no. I had a lady.

And the other thing you don't want to do is you don't want me to have about a four or five hour overlay in between flights. Oh, we have seen what happens when you do that. Hey, this video's from people. Okay, and he's got his earmuffs and gives them to me. Hey, the whole airport gets a four-hour show. I know what I'm getting you for Christmas. Some beats by train, baby.

And my favorite part is he's doing it either sitting in a wheelchair or laying in a ball on the floor. That's it. Hey. Hey, we, this last. That's my favorite part. On this last trip, you know, we get sigh in a wheelchair and take him off because it's easier to travel through the airport and he's not catching his breath. And so now everything we do in the airport, we got a wheelchair. And they always want to take it from me.

Yeah. So they bring him out and say, sir. It's literally a fight to keep a wheelchair. Sir, have a seat right here and then they take the wheelchair. I'm just able for crying out loud. They're gone. They're gone for 30 minutes. And I go up to the front and said, you guys your people feet to anything I ever see.

I said, can I get a wheelchair at my butt? And they were like, y'all's flight in for another two hours. I said, so what? So I go looking to steal a wheelchair because I'm pretty good at it. I ended up getting one. I said, sigh, hop in. He was like, did we get in, sigh? And we're off.

And we're off like, you know, coming out of the game. Stealing wheelchairs. This was an episode of Friends. It'd be called the one where Sires is grievances. I mean, that man fired up over. Hey, I don't know. I mean, Festivus. Yeah.

wheelchairs Well you know I can see it You know What'd y'all do? Go steal one for somebody in the bathroom No They went in there to take a leak And you took a wheelchair

And they come back out And I say we I mean me The first one that I could lay my eyes on Uh huh If one's available We take it I mean

What if it's not available Say true or false Me and a Chinese guy Almost got in a fist fight over a chair Oh no Because we had got it And he's pushing me And the guy's a

No, no, no, I got to have. And Philip said, no, no, no, no. And here we go. He's chasing him. No, no, no, no. I said, hey, we're going to keep this chair. Go get you another one. We ain't giving this car up.

Sometimes I wish this wasn't 20-22. Oh, man. I wish I could. I want to travel with you instead of Willie. It sounds fun. Oh, no. We have a blast. stealing wheelchairs and sprinting away from people in there.

Zoom, Zoom, Zoom, go on. That was like one went to Houston. I was like one went to Houston, and we got to be there for the surgery, or for the implant at 6th, PM, or A. You know this one. Yeah. But anyway, so we asked around,

Philip asked, I said, hey, you know, because the nurse told him said, hey, he don't need to be exhausted when he gets that. You know, you get a wheelchair for him. now. So Philip goes on a scouting mission for a wheelchair. Yeah, but I, you know, I'm sitting there in the room and I hear,

open it up, hurry. So I open it up. He comes wheel and in with a wheelchair. What? Could you maybe like just purchase one of your own? Uncle size stickers? No, they've got them on their locking key. I'm going to have to get Philip on them carriers like I got for the boys.

He can just strap side of his chest and take off. Take off. Just gone. I guess you couldn't, like, get it to Dallas. Yeah. Yeah. So you got a commandeer one. But can't you take one?

Like, I see people check them all the time. Yeah. Like strollers and all that. Like, they check. Well, they throw strollers, but I ain't ever seen a wheelchair. Yeah, I've seen them folded up up there. I don't know. It's more fun to steal them.

Yeah. Hey, I tell you what. I don't want to tote that. I'll tell you what he won't do. When I'm pushing him in the wheelchair, he will not push the button. for the up down at the elevator. Oh, no, no. He's out.

He's disabled? No, he won't do it. No, no, let me tell you why. I'd love to know. We run up there to it, and he pushed me, and I hit it. And he, okay, I hit it, all right, and it hit me right back. It shocked the crap out of me. You know, I don't know if it was a wheelchair or what.

He thought I was just breaking it up. I thought he was just. He said, hey, quit doing that. You got everybody cracking up. I said, hey, What you mean, quit doing it? I said, that thing fired me up. I said, that's a loose connection.

Something bit me. He wet his pants and forgot what airport we were in. I'm telling you, hey. Oh, I probably got your heart back in with him. I'm telling you. That's good. Field, heart field, boys. Yeah, we're out of AFib.

We're good now. That's that, boys. Oh, man. I would love to know what the first class people think when Sai comes and sits by them. I know what they think initially because here comes sigh in front of Everybody. Well, he's got the priority, one. I mean, he's going first anyway.

For sure. But he's military and he needs help going down the ramp. So they're like sticking their nose up at him. Yeah, all that happened to me once. They're like, who is this guy? Yeah, they look at that and say, oh, thank God. Thank God. I hope I don't sit by him.

And then they round it into 1A and they're like, oh, crap. There he is. I'm sitting right beside you. Yeah. No, that happened to me. There was some lady. You know those people who can't wait. to get on the plane for some reason?

Well, I was with Willie, so I got to sit by him, which is first class. And I go up in the line, and a lady who was in like 7B or something ready to get on the plane, she goes, sir, they're boarding first class right now, looked at me and said that, and I said, well, neat. And I just turned around and gave him my ticket. I was like, is this a what? That's what we said? I'm aware.

Yeah, what are we looking at here? What are you trying to say, lady? Oh, part is, oh, that's group one. Sorry. All right. Facial profiling. Yeah, all the time. Yeah, everybody walks, see me standing over there.

they're like, man, this guy won't, he can't wait to get on play. I'm like, no, I'm just group one. I just, I try to get on when they tell me to. We're just rule following. I saw, I'm very much into compliance. I'm sorry. Size's not. Yeah, well, he is.

I mean, that's, I know, I am. I mean, he's just breaking unspoken rule. That's true. This is just America. There's a land of the free, home of the brave. And I'm one of the brave, Jack. So I, don't be messing with me with my rights. Hey, you free, you're free too, honey.

Free and brave. Amen, I love it. Let's take a break. We'll be back right after this. He said, I'm one of the brave, Jack. All right, buddy. Ready set? Go.

Go, we're back. Zoom, zoom. Running through the airports and wheelchairs. So what's y'all's latest adventure? Was there any? Yeah, y'all ended up in jail anytime soon? Well, we went to Wilson, North Carolina. Wilson?

At the Farmington Church, and they were doing a by-tree, and save a child. Apparently they were giving out free socks because that's what his socks say too. Buy three and change your life. Oh yeah, Sire's got his socks on. Nobody can see those. There you go.

My man. My computer's bogg. Check them shoes out, boys. Woo! My man. Clogs. So it was a great event. Of course, Sia did wonderful.

Everybody loved him. He did meet and greet, and they sold a bunch of trees, and we did the Iron Men event on Saturday night. for their outreach program. And we were sitting there talking with some of the fans. And we had a gentleman who rode in to the duck call room and he said, I'm here because of you guys.

And I stopped. And I was like, come on back here and let's go talk to Si. He was like, I'm one of the guys that rode in to your mailbag. And we answered it. Mike and Ashley Mace. And so Mike. From Nash County, North Carolina. I'm looking, he's emailed a few times.

Yeah. I mean, they only live like 20 minutes away. And he was like, what are the odds y'all are going to show up right here where we are? That's what's up? So, look, he just emailed him like a few days ago. Yeah. He emailed, we answered his question, I think April. Uh-oh.

At one point, he said, let's see if you really read them all. And I said, yep, just to prove a point. Gotcha. But, yeah, he emailed in some pictures and said, thank y'all. Then he made fun of the Saints, so I'm not going to say too much about him. But he did talk with Sao. I also can't disagree with him. Here we go.

Is this him? That's him. Yep, there's Mike. And what was he saying to you? You were saying some stuff. I got on the same pants and shoes. Shirt. And shirt he's got like that.

No, he don't. Different pants. The only thing he got on news is in socks they gave him. That's right. I had on my America socks. America. You know my favorite part of this picture? Sy looks so incredibly comfortable.

Oh, hey. Philip looks like he's been constipated for three days. Well, you nailed it. Why are you? You nailed it. Phillips are. There ain't no way, because they ain't no telling what kind of food people brought you that you brought home with you. Well, they're in a love seat together.

Right. True. Oh. There you go. Love shake. There you go. You know what, Sight, one thing you were telling Mike that I appreciated was, you know, listen, you don't know what God has in store. what he has planned for you, you know, being in the military.

You've spoken to a lot of military guys, and your message is pretty constant. Don't hurt yourself. No, and I told Mike that. Well, yeah, that's what I was saying. Because when he told me he was a veteran, I said, well, dude, I don't know what you went through and all that, but don't harm yourself.

Because if you do, you're messing with God's plan that he has for you. So, you know, he said, oh, I ain't harm myself. I said, good, I'm glad to hear it. Yeah, that's pretty cool. That's one of the things I took away from like the, what the Alabama-Auburn game, they showed a deal. They did a special before it on something called like Operation Iron Walk or something. Yeah.

And it's servicemen from the University of Alabama and Auburn, and they get together and they walk from stadium to stadium wherever it changes, raising awareness about suicide prevention and our veterans. It shows that they can come together, even though they're Alabama versus Auburn. Yep. And they've raised, they've done a lot of good things. I was glad that our buddy, who was on here, Marty Smith, actually did the special on it. Wow.

Marty is, he's a pro anyway and can get those stories out of people that you'd never get out of them. And I thought he did a really good job. And it's crazy to think that that rate is that high on the people that protected our country. And there's not more that we can do for them. How to help? Oh, my goodness. I mean, because that's the reason I can go to the grocery store for crying out loud. And I don't have to worry about it.

Like, a grocery store and I ain't worried about somebody doing something stupid because men and women like that. So it's just, it's bizarre to think about. But, yeah, that's a great point. I mean, that's cool that you did that. So I take the time out and tell him that. That's awesome. That is really cool. The duck caught room, baby.

Hey, I'm... Hey. The cool thing about these guys that are selling trees, and this is just one location, there's probably 60 of them, different locations, and it's two or three years old, so it's kind of a new program that started, but they take the money and they give it to children's ministries. And so when we found out about that, we were like,

this is... So I'm assuming this is Christmas tree? Yes. Buy a tree, and then save a child, change of life. That's cool. Yeah, because you got the hat and the shirt, and he's got the socks. Well, yeah, we couldn't all wear it together. You got to split it, break it up a little.

Si, I don't wear a bunch of shirts that are give it to him. And the socks are real comfortable. Are they? Side wear sitting like Daffy Duck. Feet just sprawled out dead sideways. Highest quality size. I mean, look at it. Yeah, I'm doing the mail spread, boys.

Hey, that's a big thing on planes now. Is you named Mike Conchow? No. Wait, what, Sa? What is? The spread. They're making the airline people are making the seats smaller. I thought they were making them bigger.

No. Not in your class. Back there where we are, yeah, it's small. Well, I'm just saying, and they're saying that the male species is, you know, getting him sitting down and he's taking up his chair plus the other two. Well, I'm six, two. What do you want me to do? Well, let me just say, they call it spreading.

Okay, and all it is, you're relaxing. You know, you just kind of just... No relaxing on this plane. That's right. Don't relax it. Keep your knees together. See, I'm just, I get on a plane. And look, I'm a big guy.

I try to stay as small as I possibly can. I'm like, please don't touch me. But I just get over here like, don't touch me, don't talk to me. No, I just, it's just weird. Don't touch me. I'm a germaphobe. You are touching people on planes that you don't want to. I know, because I have to sit on an aisle.

You're knocking knees. I can't sit on the window because my head hits the stinking roof. So I've sit on an aisle. Well, I don't fit, obviously. And so everybody that comes by me is shoulder, shoulder, shoulder. That stupid cart on the foot. It's like, man, it's size 13. I'm doing everything I can to keep it under.

Trying to get small be small, but it doesn't work on a plane. It's fine. But, yeah, no, I try to get as small as I possibly can on that airplane. I'm not a germaphobe. I'm not that guy. I'm not jace. Like, I understand. I understand when I go in public.

There will be a chance. I'm going to catch something. Like, that's fine. That's cool. I'm not a germaphobe. I just don't, I mean, I'm not to the stone level

of not liking other human beings, but I don't want to touch you. Human hater. That's what stone is. I'll talk to you all day. Yeah, outside of a handshake, that's about where it stops. I'll shake your hand.

If you go, if you come at me with that hand out, best believe I'm grabbing it. Let's go. but also don't be offended if I get hand sanitizer out as soon as you get done like just what it is it is what it is yeah man it's fine but the spread the male urban sprawl do not relax don't relax when you get on there hey there you go John no John David that's too much that is true I said everywhere I go that he sat like that for about

eight years. Oh, no, it's been on the news. I beat up, baby. Watching soccer. Yeah, it's turned out to be a big deal because they just keep going on and on about it. Really? Yeah.

What news are you watching? Well, I'm just, you know, when I flip through the channel there once in a while, they'll have something stupid like that on. And it catches him. They got him. Call him in. Oh. Me and you got different channels, I think.

But I bet he's right. I can assure you, me, and you got different things that concern us. I hope that's the local news The local news? I gotta get my ears a break, boys Oh, let's all take one then If your ears need a break, we do too Mine too

I've been sick for four days I was talking about Wanting to throw up can't And blowing out the other end You need some dude wipes You're a little raw down there? Look I got some desicent

No no, hey You go lay on that changing table son I put some on you I got a little spatula. Hey. See, if you can't read this shirt. Look, if you need to, read this shirt. If you need to, read my shirt.

I got a little spatula. I fix you up. Even if it got you balls a little raw, so we'll take care of you. I love it. I love it. Oh, boy. I've been looking at... Dad to the rescue boy.

I've been looking at naked rear ends for the past six weeks. We can go there. Martin, I like your t-shirt. Thank you, friend. That is cool. What is it saying? Real men. men change diapers.

I changed a lot of diapers. That's right. You're a real man. That's right. That's right. I wore this just for my buddy. I bought this because my buddy Clay's like, I ain't ever changed one. Well, he never changed Bellas. Well, man, he had three others as long as he got some of that.

I just, I don't understand like a strict adherence to not doing it. So what's your option? Clay never changed the diaper? He says he hadn't. I don't know. He got all bent out of shape whenever I posted that picture on Instagram with a poopy diaper and said happy duck season eve i was just letting people know my duck season eve looks a lot different than it used to yeah it's a lot different got a new look used to are you becoming proficient at the

art of changing diapers like i'm pretty swift yeah pretty i'm i still suck at changing clothes like they get to wiggling and them onesies they're tougher than you think and more bendable yeah yeah they're when they stick that leg straight out when they lock that sucker out boy it makes me irrationally angry sometimes. Because they're doing it on purpose. I'm just telling you. I'm like, they know what they're doing.

I mean, it will make me irrationally angry. I'm like, you little rascal, if you don't bend that leg where I get this time of it. It is just, I don't know.

It does something to me. I'm like, man, I'm trying to help you. You crying because you're cold because you're naked and you won't even let me put clothes on you. They don't really, they're not that smart.

Yeah, they ain't figured it out yet. Have you had any explosions? Oh, have I? Like, That was the one I posted on Duck Thieves and Eve. He added up to his nipples. I don't know how it got there. But, you know, it happens.

It is what it is. Hey, volcanic. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know what led to that. Oh, no, volcanic reactions, boys. It happens to adults sometimes. I'm not proud of it. Yeah.

Anybody you know? I know a couple stories. It's happened to me before. But it's different when it's your own flavor. Like, you know. I just one of them I don't know I have a bidet man

I know this I remember I think on here I said about the poop like not stinking those days are well behind yeah yeah we told you

it wouldn't be long those are rancid yeah they're they're foul it's not that bad they're F-O-U-L not F-O-W-L they are definitely foul

I don't taught my sons how to toot on people now because I would do it to them like I you know walk up beside them rip one

walk away and thought it was hilarious yeah they have now turn the tide on me and i'll be like laying on the couch and they'll come give me a hug and then they'll turn over to get up and then just rip one and take off running and do you laugh no how can you not i kind of do inside but yeah not we've reached the age where all jokes involved some sort of bathroom and i'm like you got to get on to them but they're hilarious

at the same time bathroom and body parts yeah that's where the jokes are Yeah, that's where we're at, and it's all real funny. Well, the problem is I don't go anywhere at least by 37, I don't think. I can't confirm 38 yet, but 37, that still makes me giggle. I mean, there's something about it. Well, just wait until them two get in on it. Well, I laugh every time they just lay in there and ripple on. I giggle.

I don't know, what is it about a fart? It's just funny. Something about a fart, make a man giggle. And it gets me every time. It's hilarious. It does it. It just, it's stuff. lay there and you see him go a red face and I'm like yep that's funny I did offend

Carter the other day though he didn't think my joke was funny because it was whatever he ate the day before something was wrong and he ripped one I said good night son you're tooting like a grown man and he was like are you whoa huh there's a difference is that good I'm out wait he was like are you making fun of me right now I said no I'm just saying you gross yeah Jackson sounded like a water buffalo half time when he let one go. It's like, whoa, okay. Water buffalo. Oh, man. Gross. I'm just saying. I did

figure out something between pregnancy and these kids. I'm now the least gassy member of my family. And I used to reign supreme. I used to have the gold in that, no problem. Like, no questions asked. And then starting about that second trimester.

Now, she back to her normal self. But I mean, I haven't had the gold since you know, April. It's over. Yeah, it's wild. Not the lead leader on Toots in his house, anybody? Which is kind of upsetting. It's kind of something I always hung my hat on.

What about you, Phil? No. You're not the... No, no, no, no, I'll change diapers. I'll change all the diapers and do that. Do you talk about that? When was the last time you changed a diaper? When my kids were young, babies.

I mean, that's... I've been a minute. That's decade. Well, yeah, I'm just saying I did it. I ain't nothing changed. I read that and said, yeah, I'm a real. man. Si,

you, size changed T-T diapers, huh? No. No. You never changed a diaper?

Nope, I couldn't do it. My hat's off to those that can do it. No, nope, couldn't do it. You can't. Yeah. The only time it gets weird

is when it gets on you. Oh. You look, you got on your finger, you're like, oh man, that is unfortunate. But you don't just take

toilet paper and wipe it. Water gets involved. Hashtag Bidase. Just say. Oh, I wasn't talking about my own. I was talking about theirs. I'm just.

Say no. Wait, what are you talking about getting on your hand? I was talking about changing. I'm just saying if there's any sort of poop on you, you're going to use water. I'm going to use a wipe and then I'm going to follow it up with soap and water. That is on my hand. That's Johnny Deh's way. The Badae way.

Yeah. Yeah, you did one of these deals. So I never, you never changed. No. Couldn't that? So the amount of diapers changed by Roberts and men is probably less than 12. Well, I know Phil changed one because he told me about that the other day. He said, I told Ms. Kay, if you ever put me in that kind of bind again, I ain't ever.

That man can't get a deer and not even gag. Oh, no, no, no. But he can't change a diaper. He could not shower for a week and not smell himself. But a diaper. But a diaper is where he draws a line. Odor doesn't even blister on him. Yeah.

And see, odor is a problem with me. I can look at anything, no problem. but a bad odor make me gag so fast. I know. That's why I can't change it. Because of the odor? Oh, hey, if I change it, he's going to have puke all over him too. See, that was the good part about 2020 in having a baby.

I'm serious. I always had a mask handy. So when Lottie was like, hi, well, I'm going to. Yeah, hold on. I don't wear this anywhere else and strap that thing on and change a diaper. Because I look at Phil, when the dog craps in the boat, he just grabs whatever's Fandy, y'all, throws it out. Whose dog's crapping in a boat?

Oh, Phil. Ooh, ooh, blue. Oh, blue. And old Trace would if Jason's equipment was involved. She crapped all over his stuff. Is that the one-eye dog? No, Trace was just a little female lab. Two eyes.

What's the one that he got from Bill Phillips that could only see out of one eye? I don't know, but that sounds like W.E. It's a heck of a deal. Hey, let me tell you a Phil story. Me and I and Seine Phil and somebody else were going somewhere, and we were in a private plane, and so Phil was... Didn't have to worry about upsetting nobody in first class, did you? No, he didn't.

It's way better that way, but... That's good. Phil says, he calls me Mac. He's like, all right, Mac, hand me the earphone, son. Let's see what you got going here. And we had some rock and roll playing, and he listened and shook his head for a little while. But he could only go so long,

he'd take him off and look around see who was watching him. It was just me and sigh and somebody else, you know. Yeah, make sure nobody saw him enjoying himself. Uh-uh, yeah. It was like he didn't trust us. Like, he'd sit back and listen. Then he'd take him off and have to look around every once in a while just to make sure nobody's doing anything to him.

Cy, have you been duck hunting yet? Nope. Not yet. That's wild. 10 days into it. Me neither. It's not so wild. Well, I'm just waiting on you to call me for a good day, and since you're not going.

I've only been four times, and the first two, were awful. Not awful, but it's not up to my standards. Last two have been pretty good. I've done gone ahead and counted out just this year probably. You're not going? That's probably.

I just wait for Martin to say he's got a good day and he's got an extra spot and so. Never happens. Well, this year, I mean, when Martin went every day. Yeah, if I go every day, I'm generally looking for people to go because I burn out all my regulars. They get tired of it too. No, no, they can't hang. I can't hang anymore, even. I can't hang.

Like that whole Thanksgiving stretch right there when it was raining and all that, I'd look at it out, I was like, no. No. Ain't worth going on. Not even. And that used to be, I'd live for that because I'd like, I can go get in a pit blind with them all of them in the rain, you know. Now I'm like, if the sun ain't shining, your boy ain't going.

Fair weather. That's like me. If there's ice involved, you can. You can leave me at the house. Leave them at the house. Well, let's take our last break. We'll get in that mailbag. We'll be back right after this.

All right. We're back. Hello at duck call room. com. That's the email address. We're going to have some fudge ID. Nope. We're not having fun.

I want to take a serious one. Right out of the shoot. Right out of the shoot. I think this one can be fun because we can give some encouragement here. But my man, Samuel. Sammy. 15 years old. Check that one out.

What kind of, is that a walla? No. It's not a walleye. I don't know. That ain't a wallace, isn't it? Northern pike. That's a northern pike. He's a walla.

Anyway, he's an avid outdoorsman and he has sent the pictures to prove it. Bass, deer. Boy, wax them and stacks them. He lives in Morrisville, Vermont. What about I say? He don't live around here. Vermont. Not catching that big old fish.

Vermont. I didn't know he had people that listen to Vermont. Look at us. That's probably him and another one. Just a handful. Just both of them. Hey, he just won a state championship in soccer as well. Hey.

I believe that y'all just won. All right, but here's his thing. He has a condition that makes it hard for him to go outside. I have, cannot read it. EPP. It's two very big words. And that means his body can't process UV light from the sun. Oh, that's why he didn't have no skin out right there?

Yeah, and a couple of his pictures, he's wearing like a, whatever. with things called Baclava maybe Baclava? Maybe, I don't know. I don't know. He wears, you know, he's got to cover up his skin

for that. So pretty heavy question coming from my man. Why did God make me like this? There's a heavy one. And I've had a lot of time to think about it. So if I'm putting y'all

on the spot, I'm ready. All right, Philip, you're up. Phillips are ready. Yeah, I'm ready. I am ready. Go. If you want me to go while you think about it. I mean, fire away, son.

question. Why did God make me this way? Yeah, and it's tough. I'll tell you what I think. So I don't necessarily think that he was made in a certain way. I think that because hear me out, because of

Adam's sin, the world is flawed. And so you have diseases and you have different things and things that aren't right and things that are sometimes wrong. And it's not God's fault. You know what I mean? That he has differences.

I mean, but whatever the situation is, I mean, God will be there for him to count on. And, I mean, God can lift you up wherever you're at. So I don't know why God made him that way or, you know. It's a tough question. Yeah. And I will use what he come up with one day on another podcast. What is known is manageable. So you know you have this.

okay so it is manageable between you and the doctors in the medical field but my my theory or my take on this is why did he make you like this that's yet to be determined you may come up with something the cure for something special yeah or the cure for that or you may influence other people's lives in a way that leads them to Christ well no I'm just saying I think it's yet to be determined. That's kind of where I was going. So I'm going to give another plug for The Chosen. Season 3, episode 2, and it's not this isn't a part of the Bible.

It's where that guy's kind of filling in gaps, and he does a really good job with a guy that wants to be healed from being lame. And Jesus tells him, I'm not going to heal you because I trust you to use that. And I think, my man, you know, God might be true. trust in you with something other people might not be able to handle. I know my son's got some different health issues and stuff and I've often asked, you know, why? Instead of why not?

Yeah. And especially early on, I was like when we just kept getting new stuff after new stuff. And I was like, well, why Carter? Why my guy here is going to have to go through all this? And then whenever you start thinking about, well, how can God use this? and it's like I said you might come up with a cure for it you might come up with a way not a cure for it but a way for people to feel more comfortable going outside

and like I know you were wearing the mask thing there and so it might be God saying here's you an opportunity rather than I don't know what the opposite of an opportunity is what's the opposite? Rather than something bad be saying use this as something good well God does that he does just what you're talking about something bad happens god can take that turn it around and

make something very good out of it yeah because you young man have the opportunity because of what you have okay you may be a big influence on other people on how you handle it yeah just the encouragement i mean encouragement is a big thing you know leading people people see you and and and want to know how do you do it you know god's strength in you you know his spirit that lives in us um allowing us to lead people in the right direction and might i say i applaud you samuel for not letting it hold you back for showing a picture well no no no no no all the stuff he's doing here yeah i mean that's awesome okay let me and that might be the whole reason quote unquote God lets you go through this

so you can show other people who are going through this. Honestly, bro, if I had this, I'd be sitting in my house, sad, watching TV, and not really going outside, but you just want a state championship in soccer. You've got pictures of deer, fish,

and you're showing like, yeah, I got this, but I'm going to make it work, and it's not going to hold me back. And if anybody else is listening that has that, they might just be sitting inside, listen to a podcast, right now and going, hold up, kid in Vermont's going out and doing all the fun stuff, I can do that too.

So that might be the reason right there. Or maybe not even that. I mean, it could be somebody's going through something totally different. And they just need a reason to keep going. You see this kid who loves the outside. Yeah, he clearly loves the outside. And it's still going outside, even when the outside is what can hurt him. Yeah, unfriendly.

Like, and that's wild, man. Because I can't imagine that, like, as much time as we spend outdoors and doing the thing, like to think that the sun could kill you. I mean, like, just going outside and the UV light from it. That's a while. But to not let it hold you back, to keep doing what you love, man, that's cool. And with this, I'm sure you have a kind of a built-in platform. Like, you're probably getting special treatment, specialized care from some people.

doing some things. So you're going to get to cross paths with a lot of people that are going to wonder how you deal with this. And the fact that you are just thriving, it seems. Now, I know mentally you may not be there, because

otherwise you wouldn't have sent the email, asking why God would do this. But you know, again, it's one of those deals when you ask why, you've got to ask the other question too of why not. Like you've got to, and this is a bad I'm not I'm not even trying to pretend like this isn't oh man cool you can wear a mask and you can go outside no nobody I mean for crying out loud you won't be able to wear shorts you want to like do stuff that everybody else does but your platform and how you respond to this is what everybody's going to watch and I think you could be I mean kudos my man like huge encouragement to me to just keep doing what you're doing that's that's cool as crap for saying you know what that killed me

it ain't going to stop me. Like that is that, I mean, that's, that's cool. Here's my love this phrase. I come up with, life happens. What you do with it after that

is important. And you, okay, life has happened. You've got a thing that you can't go out in the sunlight, but you didn't let it, you didn't even let it even slow you down. All you did,

did was put on extra layers of clothes, sunglasses, if whatever you had to do, and then you're out enjoying God's creation. So you're already an inspiration to those around you. Yeah. Amen. You're already there. You were born into a fallen world.

And, you know, I mean, things happen and people have different issues. But it may not be that God put it on you, but God's there to help you the whole way. you know and use you and use you and i add just look at the platforms that we all use the best way we can to lead people and encourage people to christ my mother told me this a long time ago when i was young young kid you know when you think you're you've got it bad clear your head and look around you and then hit your knees and thank god for all the blessings that you do have okay because when it gets right down to it someone is all right

always worse off than you are. That's good to test the time with me. Okay. But hey, like Martin said, kudos to you, young man. Keep hunting, keep fishing, keep enjoying life. Yeah, and thanks for, I mean. And thanks for, right.

It also took guts just to be able to admit, like, you're kind of struggling mentally with something like that. At 15? It's a big deal. And I don't know if you know, that's a big deal, Sam. Yeah.

Because a lot of people would feel kind of some shame and some guilt on that. And that's totally normal. Your thoughts are totally normal. But to say, I just like some help on why. Because the honest answer is nobody really knows why. Nobody is going to be able to give you that answer. But talking with people you know or listening to these four goofballs in here

talk about it can't help. I'll add this to you. God wouldn't have put it on you if we're going to look at who done it. Number one, I wouldn't say God gave you that. I would say the evil one gave it to you. But if he did, he's going to be right there with you. Do it all. Amen.

Okay, and here's the good thing. He looked down and said, okay, you could handle it. I'll help you handle it. And you are handling it. So, hey. I said, my man, hey, you're already an answer for, to us. Mm-hmm.

And probably to a whole lot of people living. And for a whole lot of people around you. Yeah. Okay. Thank you, Samuel. All right. I appreciate the, hey, check back in with us, man. Yeah.

You're sending in pictures of that stuff. I like that. Send some more in my... I know. I didn't see no trophy picture. Let's have a big as state championship soccer trophy is in Vermont. And hopefully we're holding the World Cup trophy. And me and you will be celebrating.

Unlike these people that don't watch soccer. Like soccer school. Football is life. Amen. Hey, look, here you go, bro. I got a verse for you. I wear it on my wrist every day. It's my favorite verse right now.

done it recently just because I'm really on it right now. Paul writes to the Corinthians and he's talking about a thorn in his flesh that God, he kept asking God to take from him and God said, no. And he was like, why not? And then God said, well, my grace is sufficient for you. So that's the verse. Second Corinthians 12, 9 and 10, but he said to me, my grace is sufficient for you for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses and insults and hardships and persecutions and difficulties.

For when I am weak, then I am strong. Let the light of the Lord shine through you and everything you're going through, Sam, and I believe you're going to do that in your life. And I believe people are going to see you and they're going to see a difference in you, not on the outside, but on the inside. And there will be more people in heaven because of that, brother. Appreciate your writing in. Yeah. All right. Enjoyed it, boys. Let's do it again next time. We'll see y'all next time right here.

All right, we're out.