Duck Call Room - Uncle Si Claims the ‘Duck Dynasty’ Winery Got Him Some Flak

Episode Date: September 26, 2023

Uncle Si can't help but laugh with Martin and Jay as they do impressions of him and his bathroom noises. Willie pulls one of his most famous pranks on Si at the airport, and Jay Stone gets reluctantly tasked with entertaining California yuppies with “redneck stuff.” John-David is forced to have a difficult conversation with his son after Stone picks him up on the side of the road in their neighborhood. Martin is excited to share his latest Buc-ee's haul from their new favorite fan, and Si confidently and unabashedly answers a question about whether or not poker or wine are sinful. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey, I killed what? I thought they was geese. I killed 19 seagulls. Can't hear that? Is that against the law? Hey, well, hey, look, I thought they was geese. This was a long time ago, right? Yeah, yeah, we can hear that.

Welcome back to the duck call room where seagulls have died before long ago. Martin's checking trail cams. In this video, no video? Well, I ain't killing no teal, so I'm looking at the place I didn't hunt to see if there's any. There. Shocker, there aren't any. No, teal. That's one thing you don't want to do in South Louisiana and the marsh. Is shoot a seagull?

No, it's a shoot a seagull. No, don't do that. Oh. Because if you do, okay, they fix it just thousand of them come to your area. That was you know. When he falls, they think he's found bait fish. Yeah. And here they come.

Yeah. They're hungry. Somebody told you that? No. We've been younger days. Younger days. We witnessed that once upon the town. We saw somebody do it.

Way back when. Well, them seagulls ain't good for much anyway. Other than showing you where to fish are. No, no, I understand why I love. I never could understand it before, but now I know why they can fly a million miles out over the ocean. Because they weigh about seven ounces. Oh, no.

Hey, they don't weigh that. So I try two. All they are is bones and feathers, stretched tightly over a bone. What am I looking for? Skeleton. No meat. Yeah.

No guts. No, no meat, period. Well, when you eat that much fish, it just runs right through you, I reckon. I guess. Probably got to squirt all the time. Yeah. I saw Willie yesterday.

He had his teacup. He had a jug of tea. A tubular? And he looked at us, he said, y'all want to hear my sigh impersonation? Like, sure. He goes, Buh. Oh, ho, ho.

Okay, boy. Okay, boy. I'm glad I'm thought of what I'm not with them. We've reached the point where sign pressures are now just noises from gaseous regions, either one. The worst one was, is we landed in Denver, I think. Been on a plane. We all rushed to the bathroom. Okay, so I've never been in this bathroom before my life.

Okay, you know, I barely got in and then the lights went out. Oh, it's a classic Willie move. Oh, yeah. We were all there. Oh, we were all there. Yeah. If you go to the bathroom and Willie beats you out of the restaurant. Oh, it's going to be the lights out.

I don't care if you're in the White House, if you're at the movie theater. They don't make any of where? If you're at a hotel, wherever the bathroom you're in, he is searching for the light switch. the entire time. But, and he's hitting it on his way out the door. The worst one, that same trip, we land it somewhere else and everybody goes in there. And there's some clown in the bathroom. And everybody walks here and says, whoa, whoa, man.

Oh, good grief. And it was seven in the road. That was. Oh, oh, good grief. That was Texas. This guy literally just left. He can run out of the road. bathroom. He was going, what in the world?

Well, I mean, you make a lot of noises when you go to the bathroom. He does. He does make a lot of noise. That day there was 10 of us doing the Uncle Simon and he broke in. It was hilarious because they scared this guy back because he left. He got to lean backs. Okay, boys. I promise you, though, that guy left and Willie Robertson has tried to play jokes on us

and there's been some poor boys sitting down in a start. somewhere just left in the dark. Yeah, and just playing a major guessing game. Yeah, it's like, I don't know what you're saying. I mean, I don't know if I'm clean, dirty, I'm where I'm at. So then he probably waddles to the lights with. Yeah, they even pull my pants up or am I walking around, you know. What just happened?

If you see Willie in a bathroom, check for your cell phone. If you don't have it, go to the next one. You need a flashlight. Yeah, you need a flashlight app. Go ahead and turn it on. Call it good. You need something. Just what he does.

You know. Some people never leave pinecrests. That's the elementary school will he attended. He's still playing the same jokes. You know, back in the day, we used to meet at Phil and Kay's house every morning. How many years ago was that last time we did that? Probably seven. Seven, eight years ago.

Yeah, that's probably seven. Probably more like tent. Is it? Yeah, I think so. I don't think it's double-de-old. I don't remember when Kay kicked us out for Phil blowing a duck call it for him. Oh, yeah. There was a sign on the fridge.

ready. Yeah, when we come back, hey, whoever blew the duck call this morning, he don't get nothing neat, no more. Until we told her it was Phil. He got to find out it was a role. Then the rules changed. Yeah, that's right. You know.

But I had spent the night in there in that cold room right next to that bathroom. Mm-hmm. And I'll never forget it. One morning I heard some banging it, and I heard somebody shut that bathroom door and say, okay, boys. Okay. he'll give you a play-by-play. And I heard that commode seat go down.

I heard, whoa, okay. Bloop, bloop. Oh, good grief. Oh, ha, ha. That was one of them couldn't wait, boys. Yeah.

And I ain't laughed so hard. I laugh for 10 minutes. I can stop laughing. That's when you wish there'd have been a GoPro in there just to watch. Oh, my goodness. With the sound effects that that man has is, I don't know. don't think anybody could ever He gives the play-by-play when he goes to the bathroom.

And it's fantastic. Oh, my goodness. Oh, it's like a Monday night football game. I mean, it's so good. Must see. Yeah. It's must-see entertainment. It's must-hear entertainment.

I know if you want to see it. Yeah, seeing is a little iffy, but hearing is, yeah, everybody needs. I'm glad I'm well thought of when I'm not with them. Oh, I guarantee you. They're thinking about me. Oh, we always take it back. He was taking a league. one morning out of the duck blind.

Sounds like a bilge pump? It's just like an automatic bilge pump on your boat. It'd run for a second and then it shut down, have to gain compression. It'd run for a second, shut down, gain compression. And then he finally, he's like, ah! And you knew he was done because he ended it with a little toot, you know?

Okay, boy, boy. Come back, yeah. Okay, boy, a load of guns. It was, and that more. That morning, it was one of the mornings you'd never forget. It was me, side, goblin, and Jimmy Red. That's a crew right there. Oh, we had a bad day.

It was one of them, it was one of them split. It was one of them split days. Oh, okay. You know, we split up. You four go to the dog. We're going to go to the lake. No, what was weird is they actually sent us to the helmhole. I'll never forget it.

And then they were on the dog. Oh, okay. It was like, man. I knew we had been banished to somewhere. Yeah, we had been banished. Every time I ended with that kind of crew is, Yeah, hey, y'all go over there. Me, sigh, red, and got one.

And sigh on the back porch of that elmhole floater, just like a bilge pump. If you've ever flooded your boats, you know what I'm talking about. Isn't it funny? They always banished the ones that like to have fun. Yeah, yeah, they couldn't have nobody laughing. Well, I think, I, I, I didn't want to confuse duck hunting with a good time. Yeah, hey. They needed somebody in there to be miserable with it.

I don't remember. They banished me and you one time, and we, uh, we'll, we'll, uh, we'll, Come out there with a black with a black duck. Mm-hmm. Yeah. That was a big bunch, too. The best one they ever band was to be, me and a cameraman. It's a dog.

Just you and a cameraman. Just me in the camera. You know, we ended up for, hey, about, hey, one hour. As I'm sitting there talking, okay, tell me, get ready for us. Here comes a bunch. You know, I'd stand up, shoot, y'all. Y'all tell me, well, hey, y'all done pretty good there, boy, we killed 12 of this. at the end of it at the end of it it shows it goes from me to the breast of the blind and it's

empty it's just me and i've been i've been given a play-by-play for an hour a sigh and sinky experience i was about saying who is the cameraman talking to the boys that's loud it was a good idea yeah both of got both of them got some neurons frayed on the end It was hilarious. It was hilarious. Oh, yeah. Because nobody would have ever guessed it, y'all, and it just, you know, when they done it,

everybody just died laughing. Oh, man. Because I said, boys, y'all ready to go? I said, that's how I think I see it. I think it's over, boys. I'm telling you. He's always been traveling with a bunch of boys, but nobody's ever seen him.

That's right. I said, boys, y'all ready to hit it, you know, and he's on me. I unload my shotgun, put my case, throw it on my back, go down the stairs, he fends me, and then he panned back on the blind. There ain't another soul in there. That boy, wow. And everybody just dies that.

But, yeah, well, we're almost our first break, but before we get there, look, September 28th, the blind, last reminder, because after this airs, then we're there. We're there, and then Taylor Swift's there, right after that. And then T. Swizzles taking over the world, shocker. She's taking over the movie theaters, y'all. Yeah, it's bad enough she takes over every arena she goes to. But she's going to take over the movie theaters. Like in West Monroe, Long, they're showing it on 13 screens.

Ain't we only got 13? All of them. I don't know how many we have, but I just didn't. Taylor Swift's going to be on all of them. I didn't know we were big in the Taylor Swift demographic here, but maybe we are. I'm not. As we all know, a prophet has no. honoring us hometown so we're going to get booted out of that deal for taylor swift but we're going to

get booted everywhere unless allegedly unless you buy your tickets now go buy your tickets now yeah let's take on t swift taylor swift versus phil robertson cage fight go two totally wildly different hairstyles that are both easily known when you see that's yeah i know that's crazy man take it off hey taylor why you got to be so mean unbelievable unreal well let's take a break we'll be back right after you. Go get your movie tickets. Theblind.com. Dang it. Theblindmovie.com. The blindmovie.com.

All right. Look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means. That means more outside cooking. And y'all know. We love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Triedails beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good? It's so good. Our friend, Cy Robertson would say, bye on the grill. Look, before we got Triedells, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes from. But with Triedales beef, we skip the

grocery store and do it a different way. Triedales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch. So they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Triedails beef. I know in size case, Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't

eat meat. She isn't a big meat eater, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's tribeef.com slash support ranch families and eat. eat some dang good steak. I was tasked with the job of entertaining a bunch of California yuppies. When was that? They picked the right man. Yeah. They wanted to do, quote, redneck things.

Quote, redneck things. So Christian called me, he said, hey, you know, I got these guys coming in. They're the husbands of the wives that were a part of the live original. conference, Sadie's conference. So background vocals, if you will. But they were all from California, yuppie types, you know. Mm-hmm. And they wanted to do redneck stuff.

Redneck stuff. So I set up a little rifell range, you know, we got some skeet. We're going to shoot some skeet and whatnot. So I get them all over there and we go through the safety precautions and everything, you know. And I got to looking around and one of them was, was, was. doing a little complaining. I was like, and I couldn't understand what he was saying, and I finally got close enough to him.

He was talking about the mud on his shoes. He said, oh, it's muddy. It's so muddy. And I looked down at his shoes, and they were purple and char-truths. Oh. Gum-drop. Yeah. Gum-drop, if you will.

A good fish-bake color. Oh, yeah. I've called many a crappy on purple and char-a-truth. Show enough, I think, is... But he was walking on his tiptoes. Therapist. Walking on his tiptoes like a ballerina. Oh, there's a mud?

Trying to get around the mud. Did he have a tutu though? No. He obviously didn't really want to do redneck things. Once you sign up for redneck stuff, don't you have different shoes? And then I looked around and everybody had pretty shoes. Uh-oh. He wasn't the only one.

They all had pretty. I'm talking about like Luke Brian's teeth pretty Oh it wouldn't have been for me It wouldn't have been good for me to be there with it Oh no Because hey we'd have been waiting through the swamp We'd have been busting Deverdowns Yeah

Yeah I'd have said okay you want to be a redneck Come on I remember when I used to get tasked with those things I sure I'm glad I'd don't anymore So I give them one I give them one shell When they were shooting skis I pulled that and treat them like a little kid Wisdom

Barney Fife from us. One tail and I stand behind them just in case. Here, Barney, here's your one bullet. But they all shot their three shots. Then we got the rifle out and shot the metal, 200 yards. They enjoyed that. But then they wanted a tour of the hunting property. So loaded them all up in the limousine side by sides.

And I think they might have looked up for five seconds out of that 45 minutes. The rest of the time they're... On the phone? Right here. Texas. Uh-oh. Yep. Oh, I figured it'd have been video. No, nobody's video.

They had the black box looking at their phones. Oh, that's weird. Yeah. Most of the time people like that video things. Yeah. So they can go back and show their California buddies, hey, we did redneck. We did redneck stuff. But we didn't really, we just filmed redneck stuff.

Yeah. That's the worst. Whenever you're doing something cool and everybody's got their phone out. So you've got a rifle range set up down at an excuse range? Yeah. Well, hey, since you've told me the story about four-tail lit in the deacon, Corey and Phil shot them and they flew off

you need to take Phil and Burley down there and tell me y'all need to shoot 17 rounds well you ain't got to do that just do this there you go there's four of them there's four of them there's four of them right there kill him he doesn't got to meddling with stories people don't know no you need to tell them

you need to tell them say hey uncle size says you and burly need to do the skeet range before y'all go tell you I wish you to be in there I looked up and I saw it it was right at legal. So it was dark still. Yeah. And they lit in the decoids.

I could see the shadows and I can neither, I could see the ripples. Yeah, right where they lit. Yeah. Phil said one, two, three and everybody shot, boom. And then they got up. And they all flew off. Yeah. He was above them.

Yeah. And Phil got to looking around. He said, did y'all get anything? I like it. Did you all get anything? And I said, did you shoot? He said, yeah. Oh, boy.

We didn't kill Dolly Squad. I love it. They all got up, flew away. And Phil said, that, boys, that was embarrassing. He was thinking, I'm glad ain't nobody going to know about this. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

Yeah, wrong answer. We got 58 minutes to fill twice a week. Everybody getting long in the two. All stories are fair game around there. That's funny. Well, that sounds about like how my till season gone anyway. I just can't get right. Can't guess right.

Can't choose right. Can't do nothing right. It happens sometimes. I mean, I even had a man hunt with me this morning wearing Jordans. That's cool, though. It's cool. As long as he's not complaining. I'm a man who likes pretty shoes, but don't complain if you don't complain.

Oh, he wasn't complaining. He got out of his truck dying laughing. I was like, well, first of all, you're late. So what are we laughing about? We got to go. Yeah. And he said, you ain't going to believe this. I said, what did you do?

Forget your waiters or something? Yep. And he said, you got it. Yeah, that's exactly what I did. You got it. I said, well, we're going to a blind anyway. You can wear your tennis shoes. Look at that.

That's fine. You ever seen them in a duck blind? But look, you know what he didn't say? Nothing about the mud on his shoes. Now, once you make that mistake. That's Darrell. That's my buddy Darrell. They have that a 24-7 hunt on Instagram and stuff.

I try to get him hang around, come chat with on the podcast, but... We could have had a discussion about wearing some 11s in the duck blind. I love this whole group of guys because they are introducing duck hunting to a group of folks that don't duck hunt and don't get reached by any of us. And Darrell and Rannar and Aubrey and the whole crew of them, I can really appreciate what they're doing. Plus, I mean, look at it.

I mean, he makes duck hunting look good. Look at him. I don't look like that in camouflage. I fixed me. Or life in general. He does look good. That's what I'm saying. I mean, he makes no kind of look good.

That looks like Tiger Woods. I mean, I'm saying. I should have asked him what the panda was around his neck. I didn't ask him about that. No, I met him through, so they work with Yeti, too. So, you know, us being Yeti partners. That's where I met all the more. Yidy cool commercials.

Wildly stronger. Keeps eyes longer. But he, you know, he drove. down two hours this morning to goar with us so he lives up in camden arkansas to car yeah oh yeah we just sat there watch the sunrise talked and then i said well darrell that was fun have a good one and uh we'll see you later pal and you know i don't know it's whatever i just it's teal season i watched a hundred teal work that hole yesterday mm hmm i didn't see none of those today i saw a woody and four whistling ducks crap dust around them all now i don't think this had nothing i think

this was just, I think this is just this teal season. Last year was so easy and so good. This year is the exact option. It's always, it's always feast of famine. Yeah. With teal. Well, I'm in the middle of a famine. You burn them?

You burn them or you just. How many till? Oh, but I'll tell you what I did say this morning. Hey, I forgot to tell you all this. So I was going down the interstate, going duck hunting. Mm-hmm. 5.30. I'm crossing Washhtaw River.

And I'm like, why is there an 18-wheeler up here with his, his lights flashing in the middle of the bridge on the interstate. It just didn't make any sense. It's not a good thing. Put it neutral coast down and get off the interstate. Well, I get up there to him. There is a boat and a trailer. Somebody's going duck hunting at Wham Break or something.

Hanging off the side of the interstate. It had done come off of the back of somebody's truck. I hope. I didn't see a truck attached. So I guess the boat come off the truck and they didn't have safety. It's hanging off. And it's just like teetering over there like this at about a 45. And I guess 18 Wheeler hit the boat maybe or something.

I don't really know. But I just want to know the person who lost their boat what they thought when they got to the boat ramp they were going to and turn around and look back there. Yeah. And there ain't no boat. Yeah. Let me back down. Uh-oh. I mean.

I'm missing the boat. It was the craziest thing I've ever seen. So the boat's just up on the edge. Yeah. When we go to break, I'll text Clay and see if he can send me the video because I knew Clay was behind me. And it happened so fast on me, I was like, hey, when you get there slow way down and roll down your window

and video that boat hanging off the side of interstate. Yeah. Yeah, let me do that right now. Yeah, let's take a break. Let's take a break. I'm interested in seeing this. Yeah, this would be cool. I'm also interested to see if I know the person that did it.

I know. Them shoes are $365 if you want a pair of them. 365. Well, and Martin's size. They're proud of them, boys. That he wore, that he wore, that he wore, what size was he? Like a nine or something? 286.

Wow. Can you not get them or something? No, you can't get them, them Jordan 11s. What's that mean? You got to fight for them. You got outbid. Oh. Right now, they can be yours, Martin, for 365.

That's just a dollar a day. And you can look like that when you're done. You can reach a new demographic. That's true. No, I'm going to stick to my old demographic. I'm cool with it. I'm going to let them do their thing. I don't want to mess with their thing. Everybody, it's a lesson everybody needs to learn in life. Stay in your sandbox, don't try to get in somebody else's. Stay in your own.

Stay in your sandbox. Yeah, that's fine. I like that. $365 for a pair of shoes. On size 13s. What makes them special? Michael Jordan once wore them. He wears every pair. He wears every pair. Really?

No. Oh. I mean, I'm just trying to figure out. I was about saying if he's like a 12 or 13, how does he get in a 9? I didn't quite understand that. I don't know. Hey, whatever. Whatever, float your boat.

Yeah. Stone, you watching Coach Prime at all? You're keeping up with our boy Dion? I didn't know if that one may intrigue enough to actually watch it. I know you still find things intriguing. Oh, yeah. I'm just wondering if you, you know. You know, I've made the statement.

I've drew the line. I'm not going to watch anything with a ball at it. That's right. He ain't watched it. Because they don't respect their crunchy. I was just wondering what Dion. I remember when I was coming up, prime time. Prime time.

And I've heard rumblings about prime time. But those big trains, they always crash real hard. Well, since I don't know all about this, how good is Oregon? Very. Nucks. They're going to be solid. It's going to be a tough game. especially with their best or second best

however you look at it, player being out for a few weeks. He's the best and the second. ESPN has said that the ducks are going, has got a 93.9% so you're telling me there's a chance. A one time. So you're telling me there's a chance.

Winning what? Winning the game. Oh, beating Colorado this weekend. Oh, they're still undefeated Stone. Beating Coach Prime. Can't lose. Colorado is undefeated. Who have they played?

The Oregon Ducks. Oh, no. They beat TCU. They beat Colorado State and they beat Nebraska. Okay. Colorado State. Oregon's a 21-point favorite. Who you got, Sire?

You want the ducks? Wait a minute. What did you say? Oregon is a 21-point favorite. You want Coach Prime in the points? Hey, you bet you I'm taking Coach Prime in the boys. And the boys. No, he's saying to win.

Oh, outright. Look, yeah, they're going to win. Johnny Deacon bet that for you. We're going to turn this into a gambling podcast. Well, you can't talk about it. Hey, I'm not going against my man Prime. Okay. Size is all in on Coach.

Hey, no, no, all the analysts are going against him. All right. Hey, I'm right there beside him on the buffalo, son. Roll buffaloes. Stampede the ducks. You really have taken a turn. Oh, no. You called it fake at the beginning.

Just if you want to run that back, Hunter. No, no, because Ed asked me, are you with him on the first game? I said, no. I said, hey, one ain't enough. I said, hey, the boy's got three under his belt. Okay, and then, hey, he's got one man that said this about him. Dionne Sanders is a real good coach. This is the man that has won about five national champions.

ships. Co-saving. Yeah. Yeah. So put that your pipe smoking, baby. Hey, stampede on buffaloes. Crush the ducks. Hunter, if you don't pull this clip and post it on Saturday morning, you're really

missing out. I know you probably don't understand college football. That's when you do it. Because you will have been up way late Friday night with like dungeons or dragons or something. But you heard it here. You heard it here. Crush the ducks. I mean, we've got a real chance.

I'll win $65 just because I'm following Sye. We got a real chance to replace Lee Corso here. Hey, I'll tell you, baby. We can have our own corso. Si's lock for the week is Colorado over the ducks. That's right. We could be college game day. And it'll be special because we'll cut over to stone and he'll go,

yeah, I ain't watching no ball playing. And the really special thing is we'll rarely be right. no you l'em. Hey, but I'm like old GMK okay. Is there a change? You're telling me there's a chance.

Hey, one million to one. Hey, hey, you're telling me I got a change. Maybe it's more like one and a million. If they win,

I'm going to put a buffalo. I'm going to put a saddle on a buffalo. Somebody's going to have to find me a buffalo and put a saddle on it and I'm going to ride a buffalo. That's right. And wearing my buffalo jacket. That's what side needs to wear in here if they win. Bring his buffalo jacket.

My wife was trying to throw that away. Your buffalo jacket? Oh, no. She went in the closet, and there was a white tornado of balls. Oh. In the closet. Can you please bring me that jacket?

No, no. I can have it, and it doesn't get eaten. She just thrown away. I said, hey, no, you don't. I said, and then my maid said, I'll get a big garbage bag and put it in there and put some moth balls in there and clothes. Si is now officially going to smell like every person past age of 75 ever.

You ain't throwing my. There's not enough odd spray to get rid of mothball. I got good news, though. Hey. He's reached the demographic. No, no. Here's what I'm going to do. Guess what I'm going to do Saturday night when the ball games on.

So I'm going to sit there in a buffalo jacket, smoking a stokey. I've got bad news. Hey, to steal the Texas little deal, hook them horns, baby. Okay, buffalo does have horns. But I got bad news. They're playing in the middle of the day, so you'll be asleep. Oh, no, no, I won't. We're going to have to set us along for him.

It's at 11 a.m., so that's going to be a tough one for you to tune in. Wow. 11 a.m. here? Oh, no, they moved it. 1.30. No, 2.30. I'm watching the game. Wait a minute here.

When's the last time Sae made a college football prediction? Hey, he does it. When was the last time? I remember. Oh, no. He said they were going to. But I did have a.

You're talking about Georgia TCU. It's always preposed by if they show up. I said if they both show up, TCU did not show up that day. yeah they did they showed up they just got the butt with no no they didn't no they don't don't even watch ballpoint oh they didn't yeah hey but you know who else whoop TCU's but Colorado yeah by one point yeah win's win win win win all I got to say is Buffalo stampede them baby hey I love them stampede them and so I said duck season's open

and them with their tail between their legs, sending them home crushed. I'm pretty sure the good people of Oregon are like a fan of you, and they're all turning on you right now. Oh, hey, well, they can turn. Well, Sa' ain't got no fans in Oregon. They're ducks and beavers. He will murder all of you.

Yeah. That's two things he ain't ever shied away from shooting. And congos. Oh. Because they all in cahoots. For those of you that don't know the redneck term of Congo, that's for a cotton mouth. That's right.

Just to clarify for you. There's just, what's a Congo? That is a clit-necks laying for a cotton mouth. That's right. Old Jim. Old Jim. He's got about nine different names. No shoulders.

No shoulders. But I've never asked you for anything in your will, but can I ask you for the jacket? No. No, I'm saying once you're gone. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, you don't. I'm still here, too. I know.

It's good up to about five degrees. I'm aware. You're going to smell like mouthballs. That's fine. I'm an old soul anyway. As bald as my head is, I need to be wearing some of that mallball stuff anyway. I couldn't believe how heavy it was when I put it on. Well, didn't you purchase that?

No. It was given to it. That's right. The guy that runs the Ben Johnson Museum. Yeah. I've got to go up that way. He had one and I said, oh, golly. So I come up there in the next year to see it again.

Okay. And he said, I got something. you know, I said, what do you mean? He said, come here. Try it on, see if it fit. I looked and I said, what? And I put it on. It was summertime when I'd done it.

You're already flat. Hey, I had to come out of it, boys. I mean, hey, but that thing weighs a ton. Well, it used to be a buffalo. Yeah. But the cool thing is, see, we can't even call Si a bandwagon fan. He's been a buffalo. Hey, he's even got the jacket.

I got the jacket, boys, with the horns on it. I don't know. It's a good thing I end up there. We just get him a Viking hat. Because I would tell him, hey, put a salad on him, and I'll ride him out on the field. I'll ride the Buffalo out on the field for you. Mr. Sanders.

The University of Colorado. Hold on. I know. Sae Robertson will come to your stadium and ride a Buffalo. You've had Little Wayne. That's right. You've had ice tea, ice cube. Everybody's been there.

Say will come ride a Buffalo. That's right. And we only request like three other tickets, maybe five or eight. Not many of us will come, but Sao will ride a buffalo out onto your field. There you go. Please make this happen. The choice is yours, Colorado. The University of Colorado, he will go to Boulder and ride a buffalo.

He'll give the pregame speech, and he'll be even better than the rock. Guaranteed by me. Guaranteed by J.D. Unbelievable. I think it should happen. How can you say no? I wouldn't. The Rock gave a pre-game speech.

Oh, every celebrity on earth is at every one of their games now. Are you serious? Uh-huh. That's Coach Prime. It's Coach Prime, baby. We can add to your list. Cy Robertson.

I'm starting to petition to get him to Baton Rouge. Just because it'll be fun again. I might actually watch it. Well, let's take another break. We'll be back right after this. Hey, I got a story for y'all. Go ahead. So I was coming home, what was that, Sunday, I think.

It was coming home from church. And I looked out in the middle of the road, and there was this kid walking down the road in the middle of the road. I heard this story, actually. The car swerving around him, you know, and I'm like, what in the world? Neighborhood road. So I go down, I pull up beside him, and I said, hey, boy. And he turned and looked at me, and it was Carter. he's a traveler

traveler in the middle of the road in the middle of the road in the neighborhood so I said Carter what are you doing I'm going to go see Papa it's my dad Johnny Dee's dad he lives about a mile away

and I said Not in the middle of the road And I said did you ask your mama and daddy if you could walk to Papa's house He said He said He gave that stare And he's looking at me, and I'm like, getting the truck.

And then he said, ah, and he took off running down the road. So I get out of my truck. I'm in the middle of the road now. And I look up, here comes Jason, Jason, Missy. Oh, man. Now, I'm holding them up. But Jay's sticking his head out to what is going on. He said, whose kid is that?

Who's the middle of the road? So I run him down and say, Carter, come here. Hey, get your water in that truck. I said, get into the truck. He said, you know, go kidnapped me, are you? That boy wild, y'all. So then I'm walking out because my kids, they're all playing outside. That's fine.

It's Sunday afternoon. Beautiful Sunday. I walk outside because Benz has asked me, hey, can you move your truck so we can play basketball? And I was like, oh, sure. And I walk outside and here comes Stone pulling up. I'm like, what's Stone doing? And then here, he goes, get to him. And I was like, here comes Carter.

And I was like, what is that? Where did you go? He goes, oh, your friend picked me up. I was down by the pond. He runs inside because I think he realizes he's in trouble. And Stone kind of explains it to me. I'm like in shock because he's never just gone before. And so I thought, you know, the great dad I am, I just thought he was playing soccer in the backyard or something.

And so I said, where did you go? He goes, I went all the way to Papa's house. and I said, you went, but I said, Stone picked you up at the pine. He goes, well, I made it there, but Jeff and Jessica's dog scared him off. So he stopped before he got to my mom and dad's house. He said, turn around.

Abort. So then Stone picked him up on his way back. And he said, I said, well, you know Mr. Stone, right? He said, yes, sir. And I was like, but what if you didn't know him? And he was like, huh? I said, what if you didn't know him? You're just going to get in the truck.

And this is when it got weird. And I had to be like a, it's kind of a sad story about how I had to parent. He goes, well, I just would have kicked him. I said, oh, you would have kicked Jay, if you didn't, somebody like Jay, if you didn't know him. And he goes, well, yeah. And I was, I was just hilarious on many occasions, because if I tried to kick Jay Stone, I would get kidnapped. But I said, well, go ahead and kick me. And then we got a lesson in how you will not defeat an adult in a wrestling match. With a kick. With, or anyway. Yeah. And so, yeah, that was a fun. My wife got home right about right at that time.

And she was like, what was that? I said, well, you know, Carter went to mom and dad's house. She was like, he walked? Because we walk all the time together. Yeah. But, yeah, that boy's wild. But my dad had just passed our house. You ain't going to kidnap me, are you?

Oh, he looked me right by eye. Luckily, he knows Jay, and I guess he would run from other strangers. I miss the days when kids could just roam the neighborhoods. Yeah, them days are over. Them days are over. Oh, man. Kids these days. Stone had an experience I know again with some more kids these days while he was hunting the other day.

No. It's all full of stories today. He ain't been here in a minute. He got some. Somebody's got to train these young bucks. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. And you did.

And you did? What happened the other morning when he went tail hunting? Well, I had a couple young bucks with me. and some teal came in we raised up boom bo bump on somebody didn't shoot they'd like well my gun's jammed i said well let me see it so i look at the shotgun and there's a yellow shells hung up in a 12-gauge shotgun only means one thing 20 gay shells and a 12-gay shotgun yeah and it goes into barrel it's pretty much homemade bomb at this point yeah so luckily second shell didn't jammer

and fire. So we had a little lesson in paying attention to details when you're using firearms. Kids these days. Oh yeah. Kids these days. But I'm glad it happened the way it did.

Well, yeah, nobody got hurt. Nobody got hurt. That's a lesson you'll probably never. And it's something he'll never do again. Yeah. You know what's crazy. I'm adding that to the speech, by the way. What part?

The speech, the safety speech. Oh, yeah. When you have new people in the blind, we've got to add that to the speed. New people in the blind. Here's your shooting window. Do not get outside of there. Also, make sure you have the correct ammunition. Didn't think we needed to cover that one.

But what color shells you're, what gauge are you shooting? Yeah. What color holes do you have right there on them shotgun? That's like Hunter Safety Class 101 on the, well, maybe 102 on the shells. I remember I'm going over that when I took Hunter Safety. But duck cutting is dangerous. Yeah, when I tell people our job is inherently dangerous, they're like, huh? I'm like, well, we're in boats a lot of times.

Yep. In very shallow water, mind you. It's shallow, but it's treacherous. It's treacherous. It's not a swimming pool. It's not a swimming pool. It's cold. There's logs, there's stumps.

There's a whole lot of things that can go wrong. Where are your safety? And then once you do make it there, that's getting a lot of. let's get out the guns. And load them up to go boom, the guns and the ammunition. Now, if it's all of us, I'm not even worried about what's weird

is like we've been doing it so long. So when something like that happens, I've never had a wrong shell. That's a new one on me. But you get duds and there's misfires and stuff. And it's weird, even with hearing protection on, I can hear the misfire.

Because it sounds so much different, even in a barrage of gunfire. you can hear a misfire and I'm like hey hey hey hey don't which one of y'all's guns everybody stop yep keep your gun pointed down right and that's the key when you hear that yeah yeah you stop it is a full stop keep it you keep it down range people get caught up in the moment and they want to shoot again so bad yep and yeah it's and then you have an explosion of a barrel or I mean there's a whole list of things that can go wrong but gun safety's important yeah and as we're going

into hunting season right here folks just remember check your stuff look at it but because it's not it's generally not just you that could be at harm here so like i mean it's going to hurt you don't get me wrong but it's probably going to hurt your buddy too oh yeah so dangerous yeah it is you got dogs run around the shooting ports and if you're going deer hunting please by all means wear a daggum safety vest tie into a tree come home your family deserves it yep like do everything you can to get back home to your family. This is our little TED talk. I think we've done this every year.

We normally have... Approaching into hunting season. In September we do, don't do something stupid and get yourself killed with a gun. And in March, we say, wear a life jet. Yeah, where a life check. Yeah. Anytime you're on water. Yeah.

Even though you swim good, hey, put the lifers over on. Andy Killswitch. Okay. Yeah. The water is cold. You have, what is the name of it? Hypothermia. Yeah.

Hypothermia. Yeah. Okay. wear a life jacket, where you kill switch. That way, that way of wear a kill switch on your motor. Now, that wouldn't have helped that old boy going down interstate this morning. Yeah. But his safety chains would have.

Yep. Safety first, people. If you ever looked at those two chains hanging from a trailer and said, man, I wonder what them are for. Yeah. Prevent things like this morning happening. Yeah. Hook it to your truck. That way it don't get loose.

Well, let's take a break and slide into that inbox because I've got a very special. The inbox is broken, by the way. Is it? But we fixed it, but we're way behind on it. But we got it. And we need to, I got a special person I need to think of this loot sitting beside me. That's our new aunt. All right, we're back for the last segment.

Hello at duck callroom.com. That's the email address. It's been malfunctioning. So if you've sent something in the past five days. Well, when this airs. About a week. It went off for like four days and nothing was coming through. We got it fixed now.

So by the time you hear this, it's fixed. There's no problem with rescind it. Resend it. resend it if you send it and return to send it. I went to read emails this morning. I said, oh, well, we're over, boys. We've been canceled or something because however, nobody cares. I'm going to start before we get in there with our friend, Aunt Angie. Aunt Angie's cool. I've met her. She's got a note, Hey, guys, podcast team. A little thank you for all the laughs. Your sister in Christ,

Aunt Angie. So this is the look. I haven't even looked at it. I'll see what we got. You came in with a. You came in with a, She went to Buckees and got a grocery cart. So if anybody sees anything that they would like. Yep. I'm never going to say no to anything. Oh, you think that that's really nice, right? Oh.

Another one. Look at it. No, she brought three bags. Oh, my goodness. That's really nice, right? Keep going. Now there's a beef jerky bag. That's really nice, right?

Oh, my goodness. Now, she is the Anne at Christmas time. And Angie rules. Hey, Angie, thank you for that. We will, uh, we will. Chocolate covered almonds, Andy? Uh, chocolate covered. Oh, no.

He asks for the one thing. There's dark chocolate espresso beans. No. Um, I don't see any chocolate covered almonds. There's a brownie. Make double fudge brownie. Hey, yo. There's a jalapeno peanut peanut brittle.

Hey, that rice crispy treat, they're crazy. Throw it. Okay. Salted caramel rice crispy tree. I didn't eat lunch today. There's just roasted and salted cashews. Nope. I can't eat cashews.

You know I'm allergic to cashews? Really? Cachues are the best. If I eat cashews, I itch my entire body all over. And there's Omega Trail Mix that's got your almonds in it, but it's also got a bunch of other distractions. I ain't okay. Okay. And there's dried mango.

Bra. His pecans are good. And he's on a pecan. He's on the pecans. That's good. There you go. go ain't angie thank you yep you're the best ain't angie's a nice lady she came in the store the other day we talked for like 30 minutes well don't choke over him it's so good anyway what do y'all want to talk about

you got the emails so oh yeah that's on you i just wanted to thank ain't angie i've always wanted you how to get going oh okay i'm just going to have to spitball here ain't angie um yeah i don't know but thank you for the snacks we will share them with the whole office because that's too much for just us. We may even let Hunter have some if he plays his cards right. He's been awful quiet over there today. Hunter, do you not have a microphone anymore?

Hunter lost his microphone. Hunter's been canceled. Now we can talk about him all we want. Yeah. Nobody can hear you. Yeah, it doesn't matter, Hunter. You can put it in and post. It's fine.

Fix it in post, Hunter. It's all good. All right, Johnny Dee, you got your breath back? Well, there's not any Rice Krispie treat in my mouth anymore, so I can talk. Hey, I'm trying to find one we haven't done. It's a little tough because, like I said, I went to read them and there were no new ones today. And we did a lot yesterday because, you know, Si wanted to fix the whole world. Yeah.

I still do. He still does. We got some good answers on that, Martin. Did we? What we got? What can we do? Jesus back in schools. And fix the family.

Fix the family. Sit around the dinner table and get rid of all computers and cell phones. That's right. That's what we're going to have. Stones in on the computer. computers and cell phones being gone. It's going to make my job very tough, but I'm in. And then...

I'm open to it. I'm trying to think of what else. Only one person was mad at me for saying homeless people shouldn't have dogs, so... I think I need to clarify that. I'm just saying, if you are spending your money feeding something that is an animal, then don't ask me for money. There we go. Look, here's one that came in two minutes ago.

perfect. We're just going to go with it because I don't have, these emails are like rolling in. Jesse, 28 years old, straightened, he's working as getting back to the straight and arrow.

Okay. So he went wide. He ran a veer offense. Ran a veer. That's fine. Are games like poker a sin since they're associated with money and gambling?

Mr. Robertson? Well, here's my take on it. Give us your biblical. perspective. Okay. Anything that you do, okay,

you overindulge in it? Gluttony. If you're taking money and playing poker and your family is going hungry, yes, it's a sin. Okay, but if you go and, because I play poker a lot. Okay.

Okay. But as far as I know, you'll have to show me scriptures. Okay, that's like drinking. People always say, oh, no, no, no, you can't drink, can't drink. No, no, no. Well, hold it. Excuse me. If I ain't mistaken, I think Jesus was the winery, okay,

when he turned about 50 gallons of water to the best wine that was ever been made. Talking about 150 gallons for crying out. Whatever. I'm just saying, okay. So, you know, but I go back to, okay, anything that you overindulge in, if you sit down at a table and you make a pig of yourself and overeat, you've just sinned. Okay. And, you know, there. All things in moderation.

Yeah. Everything in moderation, guys. Okay. I just threw that Rice Krispy treat to the other side of the table. Yeah. That thing. Hey, that's my viewpoint. I could be wrong.

He could be wrong. I have heard. But you know what? If you are, that's what Grace and Mercy here for. Well, I'm just saying, okay.

But the way I always look at it is, okay, you know, don't over-indulge on anything. Don't over-indulge on that halapeno peanut brittle either. That mess is hot. Is it? Oh, man, I ain't got nothing to drink over here.

I once heard a wise man talk about what he was. talking about though when it came to wine and he said I'm talking 150 gallons for crying out loud and hey that was Jesus

I won't say which wise man said it just like that but you can probably take a gas yeah context clues I think you figured 150 gallons 150 gallons and hey it was the best okay

because the creator made it wasn't no strawberry hill was it Oh, no. Hey, trust me, when I say it was the best, the creator made this. Wasn't no boons for. Everybody would say, well, it wasn't really alcohol. Whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, nope.

No, no. Yes, it was. How do you know? How do you know? You wasn't that? All the people at the party said it was the best. Why did you save the best wine for last? There you go.

So, hey, I'm just going about what the story said. Okay. I can appreciate it. It wasn't a duck commander Walmart. Oh, no, no, no. I got it. No, no, but that's the paid. I've got to say this, okay,

when we, Willie and Corey so-called bought the winery. So-called. What do you mean, sir? Oh, well, we didn't actually own a winery? Yeah, and in, where's Philip McMillan, the villain?

In Dutch Dynasty, you know, Willie and Corey supposedly bought a... Supposed. Winery. Okay, we called all kinds of flack about that. Oh, yeah.

Guess what? You think it's a cat more flack. Well, hey, well, they just gonna have to, you know, flack it up, boys. Hey. Because, hey, you know. You are a national treasure. The good Lord's word says, hey, take a little wine for your stomach's sake. Yeah.

Okay. Hey. That's. Like I said, though, I could be wrong about all this. But, hey, you be. You be. You have a difference. You be the judge.

I'm not going to be that. Did you buy one of Jason's t-shirts? What t-shirt? He wears a t-shirt on the front. It says, I could be wrong. And on the back it says, but I doubt it. Speaking of Jason's T-shirts. I love it.

No, I haven't bought me one. You should get one. I'll get you one. When did he come out with that? I could be wrong. I don't know, but I'm trying to find something to take his heat out my mouth over. You know, I got up in them hollipers. Pinia peanut brittle.

Hey, speaking of Jace. There's Jason and old Larry West. Look, we finally hit the big time at the Honeyhole. We got a major star wearing our clothes. Oh, Larry? No. But he ripped the pocket off where our logo was, so nobody's ever going to know. That's never going to know.

Yep, he didn't want to push your brand, buddy. Hey, Jay, Chase wears the Honeyhole. You can't get it past me. John D, I don't know if you know this or not. My real estate's expensive. I know, but that's why I said, throw him up there and let everybody, I'd, laugh. My mom got all excited. She said, Jay's wore a honeyhole shirt, and then

my brother and I thought. You know who Larry looks like? He ripped the pocket on. He just hit me. Larry looks like that guy used to own the Lakers. What's his name? Bus. Yeah. Oh, ma'am. Dr. Bus. He got to look about him, don't it?

He does. That hair. I love that guy. Anyway. Larry Wild. Anyway, John 2.9. And the master of the banquet tasted the that had been turned into wine, he did not realize where it had come from, though the servants

who had drawn the water knew. Then he came to the bridegroom besides that everyone brings out the choice wine first and the cheaper wine after the guests have all had too much to drink. But you saved the best till now. That's it. Here's your Bible verse. Jesus makes the best. He does make the best.

I don't disagree with that. Nothing but the best. We'll see y'all next time right here in the duck car room. Y'all have fun in the comments section. We're out. That's right, boy.