Duck Call Room - Uncle Si Discovers Willie Robertson’s Son-in-Law Might Be a Nudist

Episode Date: July 25, 2024

Uncle Si gets the goods on the nude neighbor in Willie’s neighborhood. Martin winces with the memory of Si upsetting the crowded football stadium at Christian’s alma mater and John-David is shocked by the strange remedy Si’s wife undergoes for her latest injury. Si wouldn’t even turn down a poker game in the Angola State Prison Rodeo. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's been 10 days and I don't know what y'all talking about. You know, so there was this guy, he got on a roof. Oh, yeah, him. Fired off a pop shot. A sloped a super slanted roof. So what we might learn this episode is that Christian Huff might be a conspiracy theorist. And that is a good way to get to hang out in the duck call room a lot. Well, I tell you this, that hat ain't made a tinfoil, buddy.

that's a bright camo but i can dig it hey we just got it we just got it from this church event that we just did oh that's why i said i can dig it i have a super small head and it actually fit so i just wow we couldn't be any more different i'm over here on the last rung of my hat i just noticed that about your head i've never until you pointed it out just now i don't think you can tell i have a small head with the hat on but yeah that's interesting well you can tell i got a big and with or without a Yeah, that is true.

There's a reason they called you horsehead on your first day of work Mark. Mm-hmm. Yeah, that's part of it.

So what, what does she do? What are we, what are we, I mean, I'm interested. Todd, have you been watching the news?

No. No, you just turned it off. Oh, it's depressing. It is. It's wild. No, the head of the Secret Service.

Yeah, Kim Chito. I don't know her name. She's the rude looking her name is Kim Chie. On the television set at the honeyhole, she just looks rude.

Like, if I was waiting tables and she showed up and be like, I quit. I don't want to deal with this woman. But they keep asking her questions and she won't answer them. Well, I would just. And they're very mean to her, which she earned it. Well, does she say I don't know or does she answer? I can't say it at this time.

Well, they're basic questions. So it's, yeah, it's kind of funny. And then the best one I saw, the guy said, so you're saying you don't know that 150 yards rooftop would be bad for a president to be in front of. And she was like, hmm, he goes, man, you're not very good at your job.

We all knew that before today. Because, oh, she said she still needed to learn. He was like, you should have learned that a long time ago. My kids knew that one. That was rough. We look like the British people in there fighting. They're just being, they're pulling out all the nasty stops now.

I can't wait for November. Well, good. Never when all this is gone? Or it's duck season. All of it. All we got to worry about is how many interceptions Derek Carr is going to throw. today.

Not all this. One less than James. Shinanagan. That's all I'll say. It would be one last. So you've given up on the news? Yeah. I don't like what's depressing.

Yeah. That's why he's full of joy. And not only that, there's too much, you know, when they ask the question, even when they do answer it, it don't make any sense to what the question was.

That is what happened on the news today. So it's always, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then, yeah. They ain't said nothing. they've been talking for five minutes and they ain't, ain't any addressed what the question was. It's almost like they use your tactic. Why are you mad at them from doing what you do?

That'd make a good podcast. Hey, did you know 150 yards is an easy shot? Not all, hey, it ain't that. Look, I once missed a deer by eight foot at 150 yards. I got the video. You all went to watch it. Hey, I missed it by 12 foot. Yeah, you didn't come nowhere near his ear.

I told you I was brain dead that day. popped all the shot proved it it was not a great shot i've missed a lot of shots in my life though so yeah me too especially with basketball i'm trash at basketball you're not good no terrible it's your big guy i am i got five fouls of i'm make them hurt christian you miss the days of me and martin and your father-in-law playing churchley basketball where me and martin were there just to hurt people yeah I've heard I've heard some of the stories I wish I could see some of that footage

Oh man I arrested on offense No it's a hoot because we had a bunch of people We played with in high school Old men And it was a hoot Because we had one farmer It's the one that killed a bull

With his fist Okay Strongest man alive Yeah when he fouled you Oh he knocked you down Well he killed a bull It wasn't a push or you know No

When he hit you you, you weren't skidding on the floor. That's actually... Christian, you work out a lot. You think if you punched a cow on a head, you could kill it. Probably not. That's how strong this dude is. Christian, I...

Hey, look, here's what was bad about it. It was a $20,000 breeding bull. Deflation. Okay. And I guess what he did, though? His wife hits a rope. What are we going to do now? And he said, call the neighbors,

because we're thinking to have a barbecue. Wasn't that cow? $40,000 a couple months? Oh, it was 20,000. Was it 50 at one point now? You got all that jump? Okay. I'm just, it's on record.

Well, hey. Video record. Yeah, y'all duped me on that one then, okay, because it's always been 20,000 when I said it. I watched a man kill a grown bull. Yeah. Then they had a barber. A breeding, breeding bull.

You know? 20 grand, to a matter of fact. You just killed $20,000 worth of breeding bull. You went from 50 down to 20. You just killed. just paid something like $50,000 for that breeding bull, what are we going to do now? Hey, that was

fixed in a post, boys. That's funny. So you 100% say that this man killed a bull with his bare hands. Hey, yeah. And Christian, you are the strongest person I know, I think, legitimately. Except for maybe that one dude that

showed up to that one episode. He was real strong. What was his name? No, the arm racer? The arm rack. Oh, yeah, the one that tried to kill us. No, no, yeah, the arm wrestler would have looked small up against this farmer. Okay. We arm wrestled the world's greatest arm wrestler, and it nearly killed us. Monster Michael Todd?

Yeah. He was big. But you don't think you could take a bull in a fight? A fist fight. Probably not. You want to try? We can. We can.

Interesting. No, no. I'm serious. It was wild. Okay. Were you there? Did you see it happen? This guy, look, he has one of them big red, uh, red,

handkerchiefs. It's like a small blanket. Like what they do in Mexico. He's got that. Look, he's got that in his overall pocket on the back. And he had just bought this bull, okay? And he's walking across the price there and he's not paying any attention. Well, that bull sees that red handkerchief and here he comes. And hey, he literally run over the farmer. Well, farmer gets up and is dusting himself off and the bull turns around and he turns around and it comes running back. Well, he just sidestepped him and talking about right there in the forehead.

And the bull just dead as a hammer. I think this might have been a dream. No. No. I'm seriously killed him dead as a hammer. And, hey, two hours later, we got him on a spit. We're thinking about a barbecue. A lot of things very convenient about that story.

Like most good stories. My favorite part of it is it does kind of sound like a cartoon because the man's name and the story is farmer. Yeah, just farmer. Just a big farmer. And a big farmer. Biggin. Okay.

Biggin. Like something out of foghorn leghorn. I'm telling you, that boy's bicep was a size of these bongo drums. Okay. It's an awkward bicep. That's a pretty big one. That's a tuffy. I wouldn't fight him.

We played basketball. Okay, but how did he, if he killed a bull on purpose, I feel like he would have. Well, he didn't do it on purpose. The bull was going to try to run over him again, and he wasn't on stand for that. So he accidentally killed a bull. How did he not ever accidentally kill you? Seems like a fair question.

I never pissed him all. Hey, I stayed up his way. That's easy. Thigh was a lover, not a fighter. That is true. Yeah. Y'all, he didn't have any chance to foul me. I didn't really even think about this, though,

but for Christians about to get to hear probably a lot of stories, that he ain't heard yet. We've all heard them. Whatever, whatever you say that jog size memory, buddy, here we go. It's coming back. It's coming back.

I do like to listen for the things that change, such as prices and colors and, you know, details are in the 5%. This is me. I had a wonderful childhood. That's true. Okay.

I mean, I really did, okay? This was part of my childhood. Playing basketball with a bunch of farmers. Okay. yeah when we were teenagers Christian that there in Niceville, Florida

did you ever get accused to being a horse thief I did not I was curious I got accused of a lot of things but horse thief was not I've had that you know

I had that one you know I was told hey they fixed the hang you he went yeah no jail time no punishment straight to a hang

they're going to push the horse he said you know the kid says oh they're going to hang you for host stealth oh there's the accent he's got it again baby you all so hey I

I had to jump back on the horse and take him back home. That's a new detail, isn't it? No, no, he said he rode. He started to fall, and the only thing to save me and him from falling is I yanked up on the ranch. And he caught himself, and then we got to the barn. In Niceville, Florida, when you did something wrong, did they go straight to hanging?

No, they did not. Hanging was not usually the first punishment. What have you been up to? after you know all that information now that you people are wondering what information I've not been stealing horses or punching bulls lately

you haven't no but I'm gonna I'm gonna start looking into that that sounds interesting I think Christian I think you could ride a bull do you think you can make it eight seconds probably not really

I think I could no no no I was excited he's too big he's too big he's too big he's too big he is bigger the most bull riders I've ever met besides Godwin.

He's way bigger than Gobwin. You mean like a legitimate bull? Yeah. Yeah, there's no chance. Like mechanical bull. Mechanical bull you're going to dominate. I mean, I got more faith in you than everybody else here. I think you could make it longer than the rest of us.

He's too big. He's too big and he's too strong. Too strong. Yeah. Them boys ain't strong. Well, heck, he would make it further than I would because I wouldn't get on one. Yeah, I don't know if I would get it. It's pretty a daunting thought.

Just the thought of being gored in your stomach. I feel like that would kind of just prevent it. Well, I mean, they grind them off now. Well, would you want to run with the bulls in what? Mexico? See, he could probably out. I will say, he'd probably outrun them. They might outrun them.

He could, no. If not, he'd run over. I've seen him run. He can outrun him. And out jump them. Yeah. Now, if somebody was in front of him, he'd run over them. See, that's where size helps.

You know, he just keep on trucking. It wouldn't be nothing but size. about size 13 footprints down their back I just like how this episode has become Christian compared to Bulls well if I'm ever just feeling it secure I just need to come on here and be encouraged so Dennis Robin or Michael Jordan

Michael Jordan okay we're on the topic of bulls and Christians and I'm looking at your computer screen oh that's your computer but no Michael Jordan's definitely the goat for sure there we go I'm just so interested in other Christian and bull facts since we're just going down all

Hey, let's Google some, and we'll take a break and be back right after this. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means. That means more outside cooking. And y'all know, we love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Triedells beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good?

It's so good. Our friend, Sao Robertson would say, buy on the grill! Look, before we got Triedells, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was. left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes from, but with Tritails beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Triedales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch. So they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door.

We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire. That's all you need. need. Look, because I'll tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Triedails beef. I know in size case, Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat. She isn't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. She slammed her finger in the freezer this morning. Who it is?

Haven, my youngest daughter. But it's not broken or anything, though. Oh, she'd be all right. Them kids are tough, man. Bounce back. And, you know, their fingers are still kind of like, I don't know if their bones are fully formed. Like this.

No, yeah, they go the wrong direction. They were made to... What in the world? Do you didn't know that? And I don't have straight fingers? Why is it like a C? my fingers do a youth when i point people are like what are you pointing at as a kid he popped them too much there's a lot of things about you that are making way more sin yeah look out

what button is that extra every finger no every finger i got does it yeah and i used to could bend my whole hand back now i'm old i can still do my thumb that's why i'm saying he's done this too much cracks his knuckles i was always ready for something to run you had to get a head start If it involved running, I was out. I ran the other day. I said, that's, uh, that's why you're so good at the video game. Because of my fingers? Yeah.

You got reach. You got reach. You ain't got to think about which finger. They'll all reach everybody. I should be able to play the guitar because of my fingers being all weird, but I can't do that. So, no, you ain't got to do the piano. Nope. Nope.

Tried. I bought a piano one night on Amazon. It was a weird, there was a keyboard, if you will. Was it the same night you bought Space Jam Jersey? Same week. Anyway. Anyway, so I'm like, I'm going to get into this. And I, for like a month, I was trying to teach myself via YouTube how to play the piano.

I could play the intro to Jurassic Park, but only with one hand. Once that other hand got involved, that gets difficult. You're not a drummer. No. I'm a call a duty. NCAA football kind of guy. That's what I'm good at. Yeah.

When it comes to hands. Which one, though? If you had to pick one to play? Oh, Call of Duty. Call it duty. He's pretty good at that one. Don't play with me. It's not much fun.

He'll kill you. Quickly. Mario Kart. Anyways. Yeah, Mario Kart. About me. He's a savage. I don't have any more bull facts.

But there's not a lot of... Not a whole lot of. There's bull riding. There's bull fighting. And if you're not going to ride a bull, you're not going to fight a bull. And then there's running. there's running with bulls. Fighting a bull is just getting out of the way of him.

You might be good at that. Oh, yeah, he could do that. He could hold the thing out and not get hit. No doubt. I think I can maybe do that. But then you got to stab it and kill it. Yeah, I wouldn't want to do that. He's out on okay.

No, just punch him. Yeah. If you can do it. Accidentally punch it. Go ahead. Go for it. If that farmer would have grown up in Spain, he'd be a billionaire.

He'd be a legend. Did they still? a bull fight anywhere? That's what I'm looking up. Yep. They still do it in Spain. Did we go? And in Mexico. Hey, let's see if we can get a rodeo to let us, like, record a podcast out there on a table and see which one of us is the last one to get up and run from the bull. No, sir. I'm not even, after that bull got out

into the crowd, I ain't even going to the rodeo to sit up. He ain't even going to the rodeo. That bull jumped that fence. Do you not remember? Here in town? No, it was in. Did you not see that? It was an or. It was an or. In Oregon. Would you do that? Would I do what?

I put a table, round table out in the arena and sit down, okay, and see who's the last man. When they turn the bull. It would depend on if they've had their horn shave, like what Martin talked about earlier. So you'd take a bull to the chest, but not if it had horns? I mean, I think I would be more likely to possibly do that. I got a better question. Who would be the last at the table between you and Sadie? Oh, me for sure.

I didn't know. I didn't know if she was a scared person or not. I didn't know. He would never do that. He ain't a scared person. But the only people that participate in that are either making a movie whose name we cannot say because this is a family-friendly podcast and our morons or they've murdered people and are currently serving time in Angola.

Or drop. Well, that's the first group. Oh. I don't think people actually do that anywhere else. It looks like it would be fun, though. You think that would be fun to go to the Angola Prison Rodeo. Well, hey, it's got poker involved. Oh, you do.

Hey, you got cards in your hands. That's the same way Seinfelds every night he leaves one. Well, here's the thing. Are you going to call? Are you going to bluff when that bull comes? Let me tell you something. I don't know what I do because there's the chance of me being able to outrun anybody in that arena or slim. So I don't even, I'm in trouble.

Well, you really don't have to outrun it. You ain't got a what? No, you ain't got outrun him. Outrun who? The bull. You just got out run the person next to you. That's the trick to that. Are you looking at me right now?

Yeah. At any point, what makes you think I'm quick enough to get out of it? Oh, you can't out running, but you can get out of his weight. No. Did you see that dirt? There's like a foot of mushy dirt before you get to a hard bottom. You'll go down in a little bit because it's soft. Yeah.

This is like running on the piece? concrete you want it worse you know plow boy when he stomp on you and stomps you in the ground yeah that's a good point the dirt will give a little bit it won't hurt as bad now say i think i'd rather it a little bit hard that way we just go ahead and go see jesus just over misery complete i mean i ain't i like you well thank you yeah let's get out of here just say just leave just joint yeah yeah three cracked ribs i ain't interested in that like let's just go would you rather get kicked or stomped on oh no rather neither either either one i was going to hurt pretty good okay

when i was growing up i rode a lot of horses you get stepped on and kicked okay that's what happened to you yeah well then when you fool with horses it's always a possibility for some reason i'm quasi interested in bulls but i am fright of horses them suckers are mean you've been stepped on horse by horses oh yeah yeah the worst one i didn't get stepped on

but it could have been really bad. We had picked up two, and we got the double trailer, and got two horses in the back of it. Well, when we pull up and we're going to let them out, I thought I would help. And you had the horses in the back? I was going to get this one on this side. I went ahead and get the other one.

What I didn't know, these two horses has to be separated. Like bad dogs? When I untied him, the other one was already going out, and he beat him out of the trailer. and I was kind of behind him and so I just had to you know I turned sideways

and it's a good time I was skinny that's a good thing you're skinny and that big horse come by me okay because if I hadn't got

of his way yeah it'd been bad so you didn't get steps on he almost did oh I got oh I'd have got run over it'd have been like the bull with the farmer

okay yes he would have killed the horse no no he wouldn't have killed the horse I had horses are Big. Have you ever been bit by a horse? Yep.

Yeah, they mean. They're curious, little wrestlers. They'll nip you now. Bit stomped and kicked. That's exactly what they do. I wasn't ready for that. You're not paying attention, and it's just the next thing you feel this. Yeah.

Show him how a horse bite an apple. Yeah. Yeah. He's protective knees, son. I'm over here. Every time that I got bit, guess what I was doing? I was feeding them an apple. And they bit you?

And they bit my hand. See, so strong. And they bit my hand. That's a bad combination. I don't want to try and if they're biting you instead of an apple. Well, they want the whole apple. Okay. So sometimes they get meat.

Kirsten, you got your own podcast. This is same stuff y'all talk about. Similar. Similar. Same vein. Well, I won't go back. How are your kids doing? My kids are doing good.

Good. Okay. You're insane. You're saying kids. Yep. Me and Sadie's kids are doing good. And growing better like better weeds. Yep.

They're growing better than weeds. Yep. Weeds are not good. Oh. But they're growing good. Eats are not. Hey, look. Depending on what kind he got.

I rode my bicycle past Christian's house other day. No weeds over there. Very well maintained yard. I typically try to get all the weeds out. Yeah. And then one of my, yeah, one of my buddies cuts and he does a really good job. I was, uh, who's on my podcast

there you know look everything's connected everything connected around there what's it like living in the backyard of you in-laws that's a great question it's pretty great actually is it yeah well there if if you know Willie and Corey really well

which I know you do they're usually not the most invasive people well and they're rarely there they're rarely there so you can still like walk out naked if you wanted to yeah you go yeah I'm not like John Reed but I typically wear clothes Oh, John Reed's the nudist of the neighborhood.

Okay, all right, we're learning some things. Hold on, yeah. We can't just glance by that one. John Reed, Rebecca's husband. Yeah. Who lives dangerously close to my parents to be a nudist that I just found out. Is he naked a lot? I've heard all the time.

A man's house is his kingdom. He wants to get naked, let him get naked, boys. You're naked a lot. Do you walk around your house naked? Yeah. He also told everybody, hey, I was naked. It didn't wear clothes until 14. The few times I've been to your house

you've had to put your pants on before you open the door. Well, that's true. But I was hoping you were wearing it on there. Sometime I forget and just say, come on in. You know, I'm sitting there in my underwear. Old age. That's old age creeping in. That's wild.

You're doing your little foot pedal thing? No, I've got off of that. You got off of that? I need to get back on it. Yeah, I do. My wife's starting to do it now. Good. She's got a foot fracture.

Okay, and then the doctor gave her a, she puts it on her foot, it's got like a cup in it. And then she puts some medication and put, you know, leaves it on her foot like until the medication dissolves. And she said it actually works. She could actually feed it when it's, you know, absorbing it. that it actually helped her, help her foot not to hurt.

I'm so lost. I feel like we're out of some, straight out of some kind of Native American tail or something. I don't really know. Put this on your foot till it dissolves. You'll be better. Well, no, no.

Jellyfish stick? Soke it may be an Epsom salt. Well, no. It's some kind of. Malca's the bowl. Okay. And then close it up. And it actually goes in your foot.

Okay. Don't lick around it. Because it's tight enough that, Hey, the footage got a sort. This is. Modern medicine is a marvel. Modern medicine. That one doesn't sound very modern.

That one sounds very antique. Did you put any leeches on it? Put in what leeches on it? Leaches, no, no. Have you ever done that? This is, no. I've had them, I've swam and then looked out, talking about good grief, what's this?

But you didn't. I like where you look. I don't know. It's weird when you're... I saw all where your eyes meant. You know, it's weird. You're swimming, okay? And then you get out and you look and there's something about black and it's about this long.

Okay. And when you grab it, okay, it's like on my belly meat. Well, when you pull that thing, it's like this t-shirt. Yeah, it hurts. He's still hanging on. Have you never had a leech, Martin? I've never had a leech. Have you?

I'm just really trying to avoid all the jokes that. I'm proud of you. That's why I'm trying to ask. Hey, this is. Oh, no, absolutely. Yeah, I've had leeches on me. Hey, this is where you go get a cigarette lighter. Okay, or a match.

Just pull. I just pulled him off. Oh, no. I mean, it was kind of like pulling a wad of snot, but I got him off there. Yeah. I mean, it hurt. It didn't feel good. It's easier if you put a hot match to him.

Oh, he'll let go. That sounds like a good way for burning me. Hey, that way when you pull him off, he lets go. Maybe you won't pull his head off and leave his head. head there. You leave his head and you don't know it. Then you're going to wake up. You're going to be sick.

Okay, because his head's still attached. Are we talking about leeches or ticks now? Both. Well, I mean, a leach head pretty obvious. If you're still there, like, if you pull a tick off, same thing. If it stays there, my brother knows about that because he got a rabbit fever. Oh, yeah. No, he had the Rocky Mountain spotted fever.

Yeah, spotty fever. Yeah. That's what it was. Why did I always say rabbit fever? favorite. I've only heard of the bird flu. But see, he pulled a tick off and he didn't pull the head off. Okay.

He did put it off, but it left it on his chest. Okay. He got infected. Okay. So it was bad news. Christians over here going, where have I moved to? There were no leeches and ticks in Niceville? I mean, I'm sure there are, but none than ever...

Jellyfish were more yours from. Yeah, yeah. Okay. I've definitely gotten some by some jellyfish before. Yeah, that's... Yeah, thinking about, you said a leech on your... belly what would you call it your belly belly meat belly meat you don't have

that I've heard I've heard belly fat but never belly meat you have abdominal muscles we all have belly I ain't got much fat on me any period okay what did you just a little bit and you took a match and you burned it off of you yeah drunk it okay let it get hot blood's hot instead all you heard

and it come off times were different his head was already it came off you know with with oh yeah I I hate finding leeches on me. It's still, I mean, that's what teal season's world famous for.

Oh, yeah. Whenever you go and you don't wear waiters and like, because it's so hot. I haven't had many leeches on me, but a couple. I've had a few, yeah.

Yeah, they end up in weird places. Not quite as weird as ticks do. Them ticks always. Ticks are going to find a crevasse. Yeah. And probably me, I got a lot of them.

You got to understand. Especially me like 50 pounds ago had even more crevasses. You got to understand. Now there's just a line where there was a crevasse. Well, we was kids. A hairy crevoss. When we was kids and mama was tired of us, did say get in the car.

And you'd drive 15 miles up river. Pull up to the Red River levee. Drop us off and said, I don't want to see you to your supper time. You get them leeches on the river? Yeah. They're in the river too. I just ain't ever got one in the river. That's always like standing water.

If it had flow, I ain't ever gotten one. I mean, I know they live there. He spent way more time in dirtier water than most humans. Yeah, well. It's the Red River for a region. When you hunt and you go in a lot of like sleuths. Oh, yeah. Okay.

They're in the sluts. Oh, for sure. Hey, I found one of them things the other day at my house, they've been talking about coming up here, them hammerhead worms. You seen them yet? There was one on my back patio that day. Hammerhead worm? Yeah, some kind of worm from Asia.

he about that long. And we got him? Uh-huh. And he... That's a snake, bro. No, no, he'll worm. Like, you... You found a worm that is five foot wide?

Put him up, no, that long. That'd be a good fishing bait. No, uh-uh, no, he got some kind of neurotoxin on him. You ain't supposed to touch him. That ain't the clay worm, is it? There he is. Yeah, but that's him. Clay worm, is it?

No, no, this thing is from somewhere in Asia, and they say, you know, you ain't supposed to cut them because they can regenerate and do all the things, and so you just, you either put them out in the sun or you pour salt on them. And I, you know, I went back to like, I went back to like 12 year old me and a slug.

I got that salt shaker son and I went to town. Did it make a melt? It just turned him basically inside out. It dried him all the way up. And he was like, pooh. I would have done a salt ring and laughed at him as he could not get anywhere. And then I would have got a magnifying glass and chased him.

How big did they get? I don't know, but that one I had that day about that long. That's three feet. About three foot all stretched out there. Yeah. Those big clay worms that we used to fish with over there on river. Yeah, you don't want to touch him. I've never seen that before.

See, toxic hammerhead worm. And they just showed up? They've been creeping their way north. I took a picture and sent it to wildlife and fisheries to let them know that we have some, that I can confirm Westman or Louisiana. I got this thing. Well, that's like that what? But they eat earthworms and like my yard got a bunch of earthworms.

Earthworms are good things. But hold on. You're the biologist. You said they're from Asia, and now they're coming up north. Yeah. I mean, I'm not a geography major. But how do you get here? Yeah.

Was it birds? No. You know them pretty little plants? Everybody likes putting their firebeds and ain't from around here. He'd come in the dirt from where they were dug up. Oh. You can't blame him. Immigration.

Yeah. Yeah, build a wall. No, he ain't. Immigrants. Instead of build a wall. Instead of build a wall, it's called dump the bucket. like, you know, just get you on dirt. So this is just an invasive species.

Yeah, he liked a fire ant. Yeah, same deal. Every time you eat a banana, but I don't want you griping when you get bit by that fire ant because that's how they ended up here. And the banana bunch. They were into banana trees and they brought all that crap up here. The guy that almost Tabasco,

so every time he eat Tabasco, you can get the Reds that he, yeah, down there to Avery Island. They did all that. He's the same guy brought to Nutriot. He was a real philanthropy. you know. Mr. McElhaney down there. Well, we do need to talk about,

Christian, you've got your 4-8 men podcast, but you just came out with a new Bible study slash workout devotional kind of thing. How does that work? You can go on my website, but it's on my last podcast season. We went through the Book of James, and it's just like an 11-day challenge

where I have devotionals written out from the book, and each day ends what they work out. So it's really kind of trying to, Yeah, combined physical training and spiritual training. So kind of trying to encourage people to, you know, get in the word and challenge them to think about deeper spiritual things while they're exercising over just, you know, what they look like and those kind of things. So kind of trying to find the niche of how can I train myself spiritually while I'm exercising. That makes a lot of sense. You're supposed to read it first, then work out.

Yeah, so each day. So if, you know, James is a very black and white book, whether it's taming the tongue or showing partiality or faith without works is dead. So each devotional day ends with this kind of deeper challenge from, you know, from your faith. And the hope is that while you're working out, you're able to think about, you know, am I taming my tongue? Am I, you know, living out? Am I being a doer of the word? Am I only being a hear? So my hope is that while you're exercising and while you're doing this body weight workout, you can think about this deeper spiritual truth versus just. just, you know, your physique and those kind of things.

That's where I did it wrong, Martin. I did it. Yeah. But I did the workout first. And then because I almost died, I couldn't read. You would like my new one. I would like the, well, because it's, yes, it's, it's, the first one had more, like equipment stuff and like, I liked it.

It was just like, I was trying to think about Jesus, but I was trying not to think about meeting him at the same time because it was, I was a little heavier set back then. Now I can probably keep up. You saw them little dots. Oh, there's more than that. Yeah. Yeah. So, for instance, for instance, you have a gym in your garage.

So my idea would be you walk in the garage and you're reading this devotional. Then after you read it, you would start your workout. No, that's good. I'm going to try and do. The one you posted the other day was like 50 pull-ups, which I'm going to do a, I do the girl pull-ups. You got to lay down, Martin. We're never continuous. If it's like, yeah, so some of the things, it's like maybe 50 rounds or whatever.

And by me, like, one pull-up. Yeah, it was like one pull-up, one set up. overtime, yeah. You can do that one. Y'all ever been fishing? Yeah, all the time. That crap's fun. Hey, look, I've

recently gotten way more into working out, though, and it is fun. Oh, that's because he's been trashing you on the pickleball court. We're going to blame Allison for that. He's got Sadie over Alston. Now, Allison stepped over game last few weeks, though.

We've been practicing. We wake up every morning we hit the gym just so we can hopefully hang with Christian and Sadie and pickleball. we're not there yet yeah some would call that you know approaching a midlife crisis no we're full blown oh okay yeah no we're there we got a garage gym and we play pickleball three times a week when that convertible shows up i'm staging an intervention that's fine i approve of that and thank you for it ahead of time um but no i have recently got into working out because i was trying to lose weight or

whatever but the toughest part is i you walk in there you have no clue what to do so this is a great way to have a plan by someone who does know what they're doing. Because I just walk in there and like, I guess I'll do curls. Now what? And then you got to Google it. So you do need a plan from someone who. No, they need to just mess around and do all the exercises you like. You know, whenever you do stuff like that, instead of saying, you know, you're talking to a guy that swore off squats at the age of 18.

I said, when I live Western Rail High School, I said, never again will I squat with a bar with weight on my back? not how much did you squat back enough I bet it was a lot it was a lot oh too much yeah and it hurt every time but they just kept adding more weight yeah

are you a left guard or a right guard left yeah left guard squats yeah well that's because we had well we pulled a lot you know we's an option offense so I got to pull a lot you had to have him legs up under you Don Shows and that triple option yeah Coe Sanders man he just kept putting more plates on that thing

that stuff hurt and I said when I graduated I said never again are you a Florida now you're an Auburn guy. Come on, you know that. I know, that's got confused. Because you're from Florida, and then I was like, no,

he's an Auburn guy. Big Auburn guy. That's one of the best places that I've had the most fun. Was it at Auburn University. You've been to Auburn? Yeah. Yeah,

I did a show over there. It's beautiful. Okay. Yeah, and the first thing that I did is when I've been to Auburn. I have. Yeah, no,

I give the restaurant Acre and Bowen Arrow both my highest regards, because when I go through Auburn, I stop at one or the other. Oh, he's got a great. Oh, yeah, he's got a good story for you, Auburn fan. You'll enjoy this, okay?

So look, I'll come out on the stage, and I'll sit on one of my goofy moves. So I said, I've heard y'all got the coolest thing here in Auburn with football. I said, y'all got some kind of bird that y'all throw up in the air at the start of the game. And he flies around the stadium about twice, and then lies on the 50-yard line. And I said, y'all need to kill that sucker. Well, when I said that, they started booing, and the stadium was full. They started booing. I said, hold it, hold it, hold it.

I said, let me give you my reason why. So they settled down, and I said, hey, right now you're confused. You're running back to the receivers. I said, because when the quarterback hits the guy going down the field, I said, you're confused him. The eagle lit on the 50-yard line. I said, y'all need to ring that in his neck, okay, and then retrain another one to light in the end zone.

They moved me for another 15 minutes. Roll tied, baby. But we had so much fun. Didn't you yell roll tide at the end? Well, no, I don't know that South Carolina. Oh, okay. Yeah, I don't. South Carolina.

Were you laughing at your joke on stage this hard? Oh, yeah. No, no. Yeah, because I get into it. Oh, bad. Bring that one's neck. Bring that's a good point. So that's an Auburn fan.

Are y'all tigers or eagles? Tigers. Okay. What do you got to war eagle? Yeah, that's why I'm confused. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I always wanted to know.

Whenever they say something, it's always, it ain't tigers. No. Well, it's Auburn Tigers, but then there's a story from like the 50s or something when we were losing a game, then an eagle started flying around the field, then we came back at one. Why y'all waste all that toilet paper? I don't that's a good question I went to a school where a dude rode a buffalo

out onto the football field they lost every game when I was there and now they're the national champions go Harding not coming back not really a I want to cheer for Harding but I left the school so I feel like I can't yeah I'm a

war hawk through and through you are too Martin oh I know that's where I graduated from but I mean we're gonna be good this year you want to know why no we're not because when I bought that video game I tried to beat Miami and I couldn't.

Yeah. Is General Booty on the video game? Is he for U.M? Yeah, I think so. Isn't he the quarterback? Yeah, he just transferred in, so I don't know how all the stuff. Oh.

It'll probably be next year. I have the general. They ain't played video games a long time. They update them quick. Got anything in that inbox? Look at that. Hey, is that not the greatest ad you've ever seen, Chris?

They all new ear pillow from my pillow. That is in our inbox. A guy named Brian emailed me. me a picture of Donald Trump's ear bandaid and put the My Pillo logo on it. I love my man's from Georgia. Georgia dog. So he's, he's had his email address.

Yeah, he's over there. He's over hailing Kirby Smart as the next Jesus. So that's good. Herbie's. That's a good thing. What else we got in? I have a very interesting one.

I have two interesting ones. We'll start with Ben. He's a youth pastor from Orange City, Iowa. I think there's somewhere nearby. Like right now. Oh. So they might not hear this in time. They're doing a mission trip over at a Christian center in Mississippi somewhere.

But he thought about heading over here, checking out Duck Commander. Where would we recommend good seafood in West Monroe, Louisiana? Oh, there's an easy answer here. Traps maybe. Appendee's a great little seafood place. It's a great little seafood. My mom had Captain D's today for lunch. You want to talk about embarrassing.

You run in a tackle shop. the owner bringing Captain D's. It's just embarrassing, but it's so good. It is, no, like Catfish Charlie's real good. Yeah.

I'll take traps. It's a good view. But Cabus Charlie's over on the yard, oh, it's great. Yeah. Yeah, but it's... The atmosphere,

you ain't going for the atmosphere. That's a bulking session over there. You're trying to just gain five pounds. From where? Not the good kind. What is that? Crawfish City on. It's great.

And the, uh, Brookshower's parking lot. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I mean, there's some places around. You can get oysters and things. I mean, I just, anytime I think of seafood, like, I just.

What's the? And it seems to taste better when you can smell salt water. I don't know what it is about. But I think that. But I'm calling seafood like shrimp and oysters. See, I'm calling seafood like catfish and crawls. That's because that fresh is integrated in that. Oh, I know.

But you don't know. It depends on what you call seafood. Like John Deed just said, he's calling seafood catfish. A bass is seafood, which is weird to me. They live in a river. Well, no, because it's at river food. Well, you should. When I think of seafood, I think of like group or...

You're from Florida. Well, because it's by the ocean. It's actually surrounded by it. Mahi, mahi. Oh, that sounds good. Yeah. That's what I think of when I hear of seafood. So Martin, he wants you to know, man.

Don't come here. Go to Florida and eat better... No, go to New Orleans. They got better... Well, they're on a church trip. Don't go to know what. Oh, yeah. I mean, there's probably plenty of mission work to be done in New Orleans.

Yeah, there's plenty of it. I mean, I'm just saying. Last time I was in New Orleans, I was like, good night. I was scared that. It smells funny now, though. Sodom and Gamora Part 2 was about to go down, and I was going to be stuck trying not to look back. New Orleans, you know, you should smell like urine.

Now it smells like urine and a skunk. Yeah, it does. It's terrible. A lot of weed on every corner or something. It's crazy now. That's happening at all over. But the, yeah, I mean, if you end up here, Catfish, Charlie's traps is good. Those seafood nachos are fantastic.

I mean, that's a good bite. The warehouse, too, is pretty solid. So, I mean, like, that's a little fancier. Yeah. They got a bunch of kids with them. Yeah, well, going there. Catfish Charlie's the jam. What's the place on the river across from ULM?

On the other side. Oh, it used to be waterfront grill. Is that open? I've been there. I don't know if waterfront. Psypercy and used to be one out there that was decent, too. But I think it closed down. I think all the things got it.

All right, you ready for... You can eat around. It was one there that I'll go across on the bridge, right? That's traps. That's the one he's talking about, yeah. That's a good one. Yeah. All right, we got a Marine, a former Marine,

who then entered the funeral service 20 years ago. His name is The Undertaker. He's from Gettysburg, Pennsylvania. His real name's Vernon. Vernon seems just like a really nice guy, but he's got the world's weirdest job because he's a mortician, embalmer, crematory operator and funeral director,

which seems like a bummer, right? Although that one crematorium got Sada come down and do an event there. Get the Uncle Sire special this weekend only. Christian, that's when you know you've made it. In the crematorium. And he thought that was the funniest thing ever. But the reason he emailed in, he just wanted to say, he is a devout Roman Catholic and a Sunday school teacher.

And he said, we got some differences, right? but he's never heard us criticize another denomination. Clearly you've been missing out on all Martin's jokes about the Baptist. And a Methodist. Hey, we get that. And he says that speaks volume about. Well, no, no, because we get that from Jesus. Oh, yeah.

I just wanted to get that. Yeah, absolutely. Now, we do some tongue-and-cheek things about it. But, I mean, you can say that about every person, every denomination, every religion, it doesn't matter. But I'm not here to, I'm not here to minimize or scribes. scrutinize your your relationship with god almighty so like you ain't going you're not going to hear me trash now i will make jokes about liquor stores and who looks each other and i you know the methodists will talk to each other but the bab just kind of hide from each other and stuff like that but you know

i mean that's neither here and or there but no i mean i just hey if you're going and you're involved and you're consumed in the word i don't think that's a bad thing like i don't whatever signs on the building, go do it. It doesn't matter to me. My personal take on that is, okay, I'm not going to badmouth anybody just trying to worship God. Amen, buddy.

Okay. I always said, I've got it down to three. When people ask me about denomination and all that, I said, no, I'm not. I run with three. God's the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. and if you do too you're a brother or sister mine

yeah okay so yeah yeah I think we're all gonna get up there one day that's for unity's sake is why I do it I think we're all gonna get up there one day and find out what we all had wrong we're gonna be shocked to see other other denominations up there now that's just the Church of Christ people

yeah that's just what you's raised in I can say it that's some of the jokes is okay they're gonna be shocked who's that bunch them Pentecosts are going to be over there dancing, surprising all of them. Yeah. Oh, boy, they're going to be so many denim skirts up there, buddy.

Gosh, the mighty. I can make that joke too because I was raised assembly of God. Amen. That's the thing, y'all. We got friends in every, West Monroe, if you're from here, you probably got friends that go to each church flavor you can come up with. Buddy, when I was growing up, it wasn't a service till people got to jumping over them pews. That's like, boom.

My dad would have worked me. Yeah. If you doubt. what we're saying here, hey, get in your car and drive around. Yeah. And then call me back and say, how many denominations did you find in your city or your town? All of them. So you can either choose to scrutinize everybody but yourself or you can cheer for everybody

that's going for it. That's what we choose to do. And that's, the Undertaker was just, I was funny that, but he's like, so glad that y'all do this because I'm in. He's literally embalming people listening. Yeah, I bet that's wild, man. That is just weird. That's wild.

I couldn't do that job. I borderline kind of like now I'm kind of want him in this chair at some point. Oh, good, good guest. I mean, he's in Pennsylvania. He sees people at their worst. And he's that. Stop, Johnny, dude. Quit.

That was wild. We can't pick on the morticians now. No. Oh, everybody's game. Everybody's game, boys. Everybody's fair game up at here. Except we don't really make fun of Christian because he hurt us. We just call him Captain America and then we're like, yeah.

And that's like a compliment. So I'm worried when a camera's turned off. He put me in a headlock or something and I go to sleep. I ain't trying to do that. I bet Christian could give a nougie unlike anybody's business because you ain't getting out of that. Unless you're stone because then he's going to do a little. Yeah, flip you over on your back. But Christian, thanks for sitting in with us, man.

You have a favorite verse from James? We end it with a verse. Do you have a favorite verse? Yes, I do. Let me look at the exact verse. James 4. We're common sense Christians around here. We paraphrase all the time.

James 417. So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it for him, it is sin. There you go. I think sometimes we just can compare convictions to other people and only you know what God's convicted you of. So if you have conviction and you fail to. acknowledge it for you it is a sin. That ought to be simple enough.

That goes great along with the Undertaker's observations. Amen, buddy. Well, we'll see y'all next time. Go check out Christians' workout Devo. Yeah, we'll link it down here below. I'm going to go try and do that one tonight. Come on, you can do it. Are you?

No, I worked out too hard this morning. I'm about to die. You can do it. I can't do a push-up right now. It's just said, you can do it, man. I may- I might do it tomorrow. I may read it.

I may read it on the way to the pond. Read it. Hey, you can get it. You don't have to do the work. Hey, that boat, that boat wince don't work itself. All right, we'll see y'all next. Oh, you can. Look at there.

That's easy. Big doll.