Duck Call Room - Uncle Si Gives a Shout-Out to Truckers & Wallops the Media

Episode Date: February 24, 2022

Si declares it Appreciation Day for all the truckers, first responders, medical professionals, farmers, and other hardworking people who keep this country humming. He calls out the media for refusing to tell the whole story and reveals which book made him cry 10 times. Martin and John-David debate whether or not all dogs go to heaven. Si is fixing to teach robocallers a lesson. Godwin keeps the jokes coming. John-David helps a fan out with her pregnancy announcement. And the boys have advice about a love triangle. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey, hold on. That ain't no house cat. In Acadia, Paris? No, no, no, no. Martin County, Kentucky. Probably the same one from Acadia of Paris. Yeah, probably the same one. Oh, they're the same one that.

That's a different photograph of every boy. That's a black panther. Yeah, it's a garbage bag. That don't even look like an animal. It is. How does that not look like an animal? Guy one's in that carpentry bag. That majestic black panes.

I'm a guy one on this one. Nothing about that looks like the shape of any animal I've ever seen. Yeah. Oh, I thought we were rolling. Nah. There's no reason to. There is reason to. Black Panthers don't exist.

I'm going to fight you, sir. Black Jaguars exist in zoos and other places, but in the wild, no thank you. Yeah, they do. Oh, boy, here we go. There we go. There we go. There we go. Yeah, well, as soon as I get there, I'll report back.

Welcome back. Well, we'll all. Back boys. Ladies and gentlemen, Garvin, I thought it was almost three. Are we? I don't want to. We may be.

Well, Gavin, I was going to give you the privilege opening the show with a joke. What you got for us today? Everybody seems to love this part of the deal now. What dad joke you got for us today? What, uh, if you're American, go, and when you go in the bathroom, and an American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you in the bathroom? Oh, I know this one. European.

I know this one. I know this one. Sir, I will never be a European. Hey, big shout out to our European fans. I love you guys. I'm an American. We're all Native Europeans. What are you talking about?

I'm from. What are you thinking we came from? Okay. I'm from England. Royalty, by the way. Oh, here we go. I looked it up. Look up King Godwinson.

Looked it up. King Godwinson. He's royalty, he said. I'm royalty, I think. I don't know how that works. European. That's what you got. for us today.

European. I got one that was emailed in. What's that? You want to try it? Yeah. Brian? Good luck. So far, they haven't liked the emailed in ones.

Brian said tonight that they're having Himalayan rabbit stew for dinner. Himalayan rabbit stew. Is that the joke? They found him Himalayan in the road. They found him a Laian in the road. I like that one. I got a mess up. We found Himalayan.

Oh, Gil, boys. I like that. Hey, road kill, all right. Where'd you get the rabbit? Found him a laying in the street. Found Himalayan in the street. I like that. Brian.

I'd like it. It would work, Brian. Brian, that is, that's better than our Frank the Tank and John the Baptist joke or whatever. John the Baptist one was funny. No. That's like talking about animals. I'd love. You got that one.

When's the last time you had an alligator? I'd love to cook some alligator than I. Well, go get it. I don't know what I'm saying. I ain't got nothing but a crot pot. He ain't got nothing but a crock pot, boys. Boy, I fell right into that one. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. I like that. I knew that. I knew that was coming. I didn't need it. I knew that was coming. Yeah. That's good.

I knew that was coming. You did? Yeah. Oh, I was. I was thinking. I was going to tell him that, hey, alligator is overrated. It's got to be a crock pot.

Got to be free. No. All right. period. Oh, you be as serious now. Oh, yeah. I agree. I agree with that sentence. I mean, it's hot. I don't see how that called on. Look, I, okay. I got one in Florida, and they scanned it and cooked it that night. It was the most tenderest. It's not, nothing like what you get around here. Well, because that's all I'm saying is, okay. Cook him fresh, and he's good. Well, I just, the flavored.

It's not. It's just chewy chicken. No, it ain't chewy. Not what is done right. I don't mind like alligator bites. Oh, no, no. Trust me when I tell you, yeah, it's chewy chicken. Or worse.

Oh, you don't like a chicken. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I don't want to hear it because, hey, Stone cooked a ternloin the other day for Jace, a couple of them. Okay, and like he cooked it and it was done, okay, at 11. 30. Mm-hmm. So he wrapped it in the pan, okay, with ten-fall, and put the pan, Jason was going to pick it up later, okay?

And he put it in the oven, just on low warm. Now that's a meal. Well, nobody claimed alligator was better than that. Well, no, no, no. Hey, I'm just saying that's the best he's ever cooked. You didn't even have to, you didn't even have to chew it. Yeah, it's tender. No, no, no, look, hey.

Yeah, it is. It's tender. No, no, I tried to pick it up. Oh, it is. I tried to pick it up, okay. I picked up a big piece, and all ended up with what little bit was stuck in the fork. The rest of it just fell off because it was too tender. I had to put that fork under there and then put it on my plate. Too tender. I love it.

That's what they said. Too tender. Oh, no, no, that was a fine. Oh, that was cold. Well, I like whenever we're talking about the marriage. He just said alligator was terrible. He told me how good. Hey, alligator is terrible.

Wait, did you eat alligator? But then you just told me how? I've ate it. But this was tenderloin that you're talking about. Yeah, he's talking about beef tenderloin. Yeah, beef tinol. Yeah, we're talking about alligator. Oh, but nobody compared alligator to beef.

No. Well, I'm just saying, hey, I don't compare alligator to anything. Hey, go ahead and, hey. Maybe that Himalayan rabbits. If you're fond of it, great, okay. Me personally, you know, thought to the dogs and the dogs. you're going to turn their nose up at it. That's like his boy, when I worked at Riverwood, he was a big turkey hunter.

He was telling me, them turkeys, they ain't, wild turkeys, they ain't no good. I looked at him, I said, boy, wrong answer. You can't cook. Wrong answer. He says chicken ain't no good when he eats it on his own. Who is? That guy is. Oh, yeah, no, that wild turkey is fantastic.

I'm ready for Jordan to hit the road and get the hunting things again. I'm going to tax him. I went turkey and just a little bit. I didn't turkey hunting one time, and they was all fired up over that turkey I killed. I didn't know how big it was because I don't turkey hunt. That's during the crappies bone, but anyway, they got some maribou on the chest of them turkeys. They said, you need to get fired up? I said, I am.

I said, do you know what you can do with a little chartreuse on that right there? You be catch you some crappies, boy. They're talking about spurs and beards and gobbels. just looking at feathers. Yeah, they told me that's all he was worried about. His claws on it, they said, was long. No, my uncle had done that. He, you know, out of squirrel hide, deer hide, duck feathers,

anything that wild he killed. And his taco box was impressive when he'd opened it. Oh, yeah. And I, it would eat it up. Doesn't went to waste. That maribou, I can't believe. Or all that manor. Maribu come from.

That was awesome. That's a bunch of feathers. Bring me some maribou when you kill it, I ain't going to tell you up. He ain't going. I mean, I may go to Texas. He's scared them big old. He ain't done it.

He's scared them big old, bigfooted things that kick people and whip people. Oh, them ostriches? No, that ostrich is a strong statement. Healthy respect. Healthy respect. Healthy respect. Healthy respect is a very true statement. I would just fix that.

Have you seen them feet on them suckers? Hey, he got some claws on that. I can say something. Well, he opens his mouth at you and sticks that tongue out hissing. Yeah. I don't need to see his teeth. You got them wings out? That's good enough.

Because he taller than me. And I'm six full. So he, you know. But I'm just saying. No, I just don't. Peggy out in one of them things, kind of like God would say, it's right when the best fishing is going. Mm-hmm.

And I love to fish. and so if I turkey hunt it's because I think I ain't much on turkey ain't nothing else to do we're not blowing too hard yeah but that makes turkey hunting hard so because any can't hear nothing

you know so it's just one but turkey it's fun just Louisiana sucks for turkey hunting you got to drive eight hours from here to get into pretty good turkey hunt the turkey's here they're wild there's not many up there's survivors

everything is wilder in Louisiana it is I noticed that's because they get hunted 12 months out of year. Oh, no, no. And back in 1942, old boy and his brother were just putting a, just taxing everything. And if a fish, a fish here knows, too, if he opens his mouth, he's going to get the sides knocked off of it. I mean, they even scared to eat.

They're like, catching release ain't big here. Everything getting wilder. It really is. For good reason. Inflation, man. Inflation. Nflation, boys, without representation. How do we do this fight?

How do we get here? I don't know. That's why I said start. We'll see where we end up. Here we go. Oh, my goodness gracious. Before we got on here, he was telling me about your new favorite TV show.

I'd like our fans to know what your new favorite TV show. That would be Steve Harvey. Like he had what celebrity, Jeopardy? Family feud. Yeah, family feud. Yeah, he was that one. He had that, and he was always relapse on that. Okay, but now there's Judge Steve Harvey.

Judge Steve, I haven't heard about him. Don't know, no, look, and hey. I think it comes on about three in the afternoon, so the rest of him. Oh, he comes on at night. I don't remember. No, he's a sleep thing. Anyway, that's nap time like yesterday. He's a no-nonsense, common-sense judge.

Okay, so don't. come in his courts and be, you know, babbling nonsense. Don't come blow and smoke. Yeah, don't come blow and smoke because Steve Harvey is the best in the world. So, hey, he recognized that right quick. Hey, he throw you out of his courtroom. But no, we just walked. He brought it up.

It was hilarious. Yeah, we watched the clip for you got here. It was funny. He's a one day. Oh, no. He's a gym. Oh, yeah. Gym of society.

He's very quick on his feet, okay. And the boy grew up poor, okay, and made it, you know, made it in the comedian world big time. Okay, and in the acting and everything else. And he's a fan of yours. Oh, no, and I'm a big fan of his. That's what's so funny. Oh, it does come up. That's a prime time show.

Oh, no, no, no. Hey, that's his best piece of work by far right now, in my humble opinion. There's five episodes. Well, I know, but, hey, I've watched them in air. I'm serious, and hey, he's at his best because with this 19-year-old kid that was, he brought his mom and dad into court and they was trying to sue him for $10,000. They were trying to sue their own kids for kitchen damage. He blew up their kitchen. He blew up.

When he cooked, he blows things up and it went viral. That's how he made something like $44,000. Well, when Judge Harvey is getting ready to give his ruling, he said, young man, how old are you? He said, 19. He said, well, right now,

he said, here's the deal. Y'all, I rule it for your mom and dad. You'll pay them $1,000 a month, unless. How much money have you got? And the kid says, well, I've got 44, 44. And, you know, Steve Hart said, 44 what? And he said, 44K. He said, wait a minute, ruling has been changed.

He said, the ruling has been changed. He said, you're, oh, you. your parents $10,000 and you will pay it immediately after this court is done. Slam the gavel and said, hey, and get out of here. Get out of here. He said, get out of here. He walked off. That's the one we watched a while ago.

It was funny. But hey, but it's one of his best deals. So what you're telling me, Cy, is Steve Harvey proves there's still common sense in this world. Oh, yeah. Amen. I can appreciate it. Probably the only one. Well, no, no, it may be.

Only one on television anyway. I thought I'm saying. All right, well, let's take a break. We'll be back right after this. Okay. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means.

That means more outside cooking. And y'all know we love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Triedales beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good? It's so good. Our friend, Sao Robertson would say, buy on the grill. Look, before we got Triedells, getting ready for a cookout, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things,

grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes from. But with Triedales beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Triedales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch. So they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way.

Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Triedails beef. I know in size case, Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat.

She ain't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash. support ranch families and eat some dang good steak where you want to go here's where we're going to go all right we're going to go and and it's going to be appreciation day on the podcast who are we appreciate well thank you well i'll tell you why i brought this up policemen i was in in uh nassville about three weeks ago yeah pipeline people took me up there and they took me to the grand old

opera and a bunch of other stuff to just say thank you for being their goodwill ambassador. So, okay, so when I was doing that, I was staying at a plantation in Franklin, Tennessee, okay, for three days, and I looked up on the shelf and there's a little book that says, okay, invitation for dinner with a perfect stranger was the title of a book, and it's about that thing. Well, in the next two hours, I read it from, you know, first page all the way through. And the perfect stranger was Jesus. Wow. Okay.

So it was pretty cool, and it was a very well-written book. And then come back down here and my buddy, Lester, with American Scroll.com, he sent me a book by a good friend of his. his good friend wrote the book. He's a neurosurgeon, brain surgeon, brain. His man, you know. He's smarter than us. He operates on people's brain.

But anyway, the reason I said appreciation, we don't appreciate the doctors and the nurses and the people that take care of the human race on a daily basis. Yeah. So, yeah, so, yeah. We don't, we don't, we don't. appreciate them enough and we don't ever tell them thank you enough for actually taking care of us. And none of us are very appreciative to it when they do take care of us

because they're either always poking us, giving us a shot or doing something that we dislike. Okay, but that goes with the territory. And I had not realized until I read that book, how would you like a job where you go to work every day? and all you do is people get referred to you by other doctors and when they refer them to you they're on their way out yeah so this guy has to deal with death on a daily basis yeah because you don't end up in the neurosurgeon's office because everything's all right

so in this route and this doctor okay dr. Warren he's having trouble with God and all this stuff that he has to go through on a daily basis. He has a lot of doubt. He has a lot of

bad times, let's say. Okay. So it was a very well-written book and a very, you know, I probably cried ten times. while I was reading it. Okay, because you get to know

these are real people, okay? This is not a fiction book. Yeah. This is real life, in real situations, and some of the most amazing people I read about. One woman, okay, she's been trying her and her husband are young,

they in their 40s, okay, they finally get, she gets pregnant, and then she starts having headaches and actually passes out and then gets referred to Dr. Warren and of course she's got a malignant tumor in her head that he has to operate on and they're going through all the therapeutic

stuff that they can do to help her survive. And one of them is, okay, you will probably have to, you'll probably have to do a therapeutic abortion. And she said, wrong answer, Doc. I'm not killing my child.

I'm not killing my little baby girl. So she carries the young lady to full term, gives birth to her daughter, okay? Dies two months later. Okay. So it's just you know, when I

read these last two books, God is impeccable with timing. okay because I'm getting older and death is looming okay any time now okay yeah that's just

that's just the fact yeah okay so it's these things and I never realized all the decisions that messed up human race has to deal with on a daily basis okay

yeah because it doesn't affect you right you're not involved yeah out of sight out of mind right So you don't realize. You don't even think about it. Yeah. Until it falls on your door. No, no.

Yeah. And then you're like, oh, boy. Yeah. Because that was just one of the things I said, amen. You know, I always, you know, the Bible says this, talking about, Jesus told his apostles, said, told Diding Thomas. He said, because you've seen me, you believe. Blessed is the one that has not seen me and he still believes.

Yeah. Okay. So that's, that's one of the same. of them things about, you know, always, always my prayers, you know, I believe, but help me with my unbelief. When I go on, go on, fall off the log on the side of doubt, that's when I need you to, hey, pull me back over and help me, help me with my unbelief. Yeah, yeah, hook that wrench cable back up. Yeah, yeah. Pull me back up where, put me where I need to be.

Yeah. Yeah. But I just looked at these people that was in the book, okay, that, you know, they met stuff head on and dealt with it and just the most extraordinary yeah

it wasn't the word it's it's it's mind-boggling okay that they keep going because the one that other one that broke me down the young man was named Samuel

he had it okay he's dying and here's what he did the night before his surgery. He called his family together, his wife and his kid, and he said, hey, if this doesn't go well with me and my quality of life is no good, he said, y'all've got to suck it up and let me go. Send me on. Yeah, send me on.

Let him take me, let him take me home. Mm-hmm. Y'all ain't even saying that right now. I just look and, gosh. you know and that's what happened and they did yeah well good for them no no yeah and look then they said okay we want to have a meeting with you doc and doc was going to think well okay they're fixing you know blast me

for killing their husband because he actually died on the operating table yeah yeah so it was one thing and they said hey no you know wrong answer we thank you for the care you gave our our father and my husband while he was under your care it couldn't have been any better you've done the best you could do yeah he probably don't hear that a whole lot no no he don't

it's always he's the one that's there and when somebody's hurting especially when it's over a loss or someone close to them they lash out yeah he's probably walked in that room one too many times of saying so I just

my hat's off to you there Dr. Warren with your lifestyle with what you have to go through every day of your life and how well you're holding up my man we all doubt and never said my prayer for you is hey help like i ask god help me all the time with my own belief yeah that's my prayer for you my man yeah yeah god help him with his own belief when he needs uh you know but i like i like the painting footprints in the sand yeah yeah when you notice when you notice there was one foot It wasn't one set of foot, you know, where were you?

Yeah. And he said, I got you in my arms, them are my footprints. Yeah, I was totally. Yeah. Yeah, God says, hey, I got you in my arms, them or my footprint, son, that you're looking at in the sand. Yeah. That's my wish for you, Doc. May God always carry you through what you have to do on a daily basis, my man.

Amen. And that goes for all of our listeners out there. Nurses and doctors. Nurses, doctors, anybody that's on that front line of all that mess, look. It's been a rough year. Rough, I guess actually two years now, two and a half years, however long it's been. Lifetime. Yeah, it's kind of a time, warp, but especially this.

And y'all do see us at our worst. You very rarely see us at our best. And you do it with a smile on your face, and you do it because you love other people. And we appreciate that. And if they're just a family member of yours, let them know that you appreciate them and that we do too. Appreciation Day on the podcast. Yeah, hey, we used to have teacher appreciation day where we gave. teachers like gifts and stuff so we might as well do it for everybody.

Well, I think so they don't get enough. Another one, another one always comes to my mind is okay. They do a thankless job too, and that's their men and blue. Amen. Men and women in blue. Blue, red, green, whatever color they decided. Our firefighters, our firefighters, our cops. Yeah.

That, you know, they put their life on the line every day for us. And during the Duck Dynasty show, we had to ride along with the police and I always I asked some real hard questions to one of the persons I was riding with and he said, y'all trying to set me up? I said, no, I said, look, this is just stuff that I wanted to know. Just curious.

Yeah. Yeah, I'm curious. Yeah. You know, you deal with, I said, how do I put this in a nice way? You deal with your deal, you deal with the bad side of society, so to speak. He said, oh, that's not true.

He said, most of my day has spent helping a citizen. He said most of the time He said now do every once in a while I run up on something bad? Yeah, I had to kill a guy once You know, and all this That goes with being a policeman

Yeah But it just, you know It shocked me That most of his stuff was good stuff Yeah, you just hear about the bad Yeah, because all you ever see on the news Yeah It's okay, you know, bad stuff

Yeah You never hear about okay That's what good stuff don't sell Yeah, good stuff don't sell Yeah, good stuff don't sell You know why? because you're expected to do good stuff. Well, that's wrong, though.

That's what it is. Hey, show me all of life. That's right. Amen. Show me all of life. Show me the good stuff that the human being does to each other instead of just all the bad stuff we do to each other. Not allowed.

I think your whole brand is built off of that right there. No, no, no. It makes me mad. I've just said. Yeah, it makes me mad. Okay. You know, that's like our schools, okay? You know, look, I don't mind you teaching the theory of evolution.

It's a theory. But hey, also give me the creation side. Okay, let me make my mind up what I want to believe in. Okay, I would do the same thing for you, okay? I'll give you your choice. As a believer with a biology degree, I can tell you, those lines get crowded and clouded all through the time. Well, they do.

They do. And it's wrong. Yeah. That's like Paul Harvey, okay, was famous for it. Now, let me give you the rest of the story. I miss Paul Harvey. No, no, I do. It takes me back to right now.

No, no, because he didn't give you. He didn't give you just his version. Yeah. He gave you the whole story. Ango cab. And our media, you know, our media should be ashamed of himself. Y'all need to give the whole story. There you go.

out loud. Tell them. Get it, Sa'i. Yeah. Don't give me half the story. I want the complete story and the truth. The whole truth. Yeah, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

Amen. Let's take a break. We'll be back right after that. Good day. All right. Well, look, I started this appreciation day. So we're going to keep throwing some out there of people that probably don't get thanked enough.

Why not? And I'll say one because I like to bin one. All right. What's that? When I dropped out of Louisiana Tech and before I got drafted. What was you going to be? A truck driver. Oh, I thought you were going to say a dance trip.

No, no, no, no, no. I drive a truck. I went, hey. But I was lucky. Look, I went in and applied for a job and the guy said, okay, yeah, I'll come back tomorrow. As a truck driver? I remember that episode of Duck Dynasty. I don't think you were cut out.

Well, no, no, but anyway, I actually did, okay. And when I was walking out, there was an old man sitting there. And he said, young man. I said, yes, sir. He said, come in a minute. And I said, where you got? He said, you don't want to work for this guy. He lied to you flat out.

He said, you're not going to be home every night. He said, if his lips were moving, he's lying. He said, so don't come back tomorrow. He said, I'm telling you, I'm doing your favor. You don't want to work for this guy. He's a liar. You'll be on the road from now. And I didn't.

So I didn't. He took that man. I can appreciate that though. Truck drivers are unappreciated. Amen. Look, the truck drivers are how our stuff makes it out of here to the rest of the world. Oh, yeah. And when I say truck driver, I'm talking about UPS, FedEx, our male men and women, all those drivers.

And then some of them leave here by 18 wheeler to go to the big stores that order a ton of stuff. Yeah, and on the road 724. Yeah, because they'll pick. I mean, you know, like for us, if they pick up and they've got to go to Springfield, Missouri, and they pick up from us at 4 p.m. They're driving. He's spending the night in Springfield. Missouri.

Which, by the way, if you ain't been in Springfield, there ain't a whole lot to do outside Bass Pro Shops. That's where he was going. That's where he was going. That's where he was going. But I'm saying, it's shut down at 11 o'clock at night by the time he get there. All you got to know about truck drivers is the second it gets icy down here, and we don't know anything about ice and roads and we just shut down as a society. The grocery stores are empty.

Yeah. Oh, no, no, no. And they got to roll. Yeah, and they keep rolling. And they keep rolling. They know how to drive in the snow. Yeah. Them suckers.

But the problem is, we think we do, and we get out there and get in their way. Yeah. And they ain't stopping as quick as we do. No. For those that drive trucks on our highways and byways, amen. Thank you very much for what you do. do for us on a daily home for many days away from home?

I think our buddy, Mr. Aldine, called them asphalt cowboys. Did you imagine we didn't have trucks? No, okay. What would we do? I guess live off the land? Because you couldn't buy anything because nobody'd have anything. These train tracks would be a lot busier. Yeah, I suppose.

Because the people driving the trains, nobody said nothing them. They just gripe at them because they're holding up traffic. Look, our office is a 20th of a mile from a train track. I get how aggravating a train can be and then I look on there and I see coal and rock and concrete and everything else that it takes to live and I'm like, you know what,

I can wait five minutes. Ain't no big deal. You know, but so all these people that you gripe about because you didn't leave in time and you running late, they getting stuff for you to live on. So quit griping,

let them do their job, move on down the road. Because you're late. We're coming to the part of the year around here where you're about to get behind them big green tractors. and orange tractors and blue tractors, let the farmers do their stinking job. Hey, they're feeding us. Yeah, they feeding us.

They're taking care of it. And you know what else they're feeding? They feeding ducks too. So let them do the damn gum job. If they got to get rice in the ground, let them get rice in the ground, by God. Don't go around them. Don't try to run them off the road.

Just say, you know what? I should have left five minutes earlier and I could have probably avoided this. You'd be like, Cy, just be 15 minutes early to everything you go. Well, just like this one. We were supposed to record this yesterday. It got to 145.

We're supposed to record it too. I said, ain't no way side knows about this because he doesn't have been here. He's already 30 minutes late. He's 15 minutes 30. By the way, how was your nap yesterday when we were supposed to record?

No, no. My wife later, I come in there turned on Matt Dillon. She said, by the way, you missed a podcast today. I said, hey, don't, I didn't miss nothing. I said, they didn't call me. I said, if they don't call me, I ain't going to be there.

Uh-oh. That's why this works, boys. So, yeah. Oh, man. You'll start calling me, too. Well, he called, and Martin said, Let him sleep. I said, no, no, no.

I said, don't wake him up. No, no, because she said, you know, and said Martin called me and said, about 15 minutes till, and said, he ain't, he. And she said, no, he's asleep. I said, let him sleep. And he said, hey, don't even wake him up.

We'll do it tomorrow. Yeah, there ain't a big deal. Man, needs a nap. Yeah, I mean. He's been doing it every. day for the last 72 years. Look, I've done that in a 24-year career in the military. It was a professional nap. Oh, no, no, no, no. Look, you have not, you do don't understand how many people I had pissed off when I could get an hour night. The whole unit was pissed off at me the whole time I was there.

Well, I thought it. I always got a nap. Well, I thought it was you first when I called yesterday, because as soon as the phone rang the first time, bonged somebody hung up on me. I said, I said that cheap sucker, I said that cheap sucker done Castle Caller ID again. How am I ever going to get through? No, no.

I, I fixed to teach robo callers. You ain't getting to me, Jack. And neither is anyone else. There ain't nobody else. The other day, I don't remember who it was now, but anyway,

all you know it was Christine. And she called and you on that phone? No, no. I was just fixing hit the button and I said wait a minute something's familiar but I better let me say

hello she said hey you're supposed to be up to the elephant and duck around I said oh okay I was just fixed to push the dead button on you baby

I just knew it was you and I said oh man he saw a caller idea and now he remember he coming up here so I gave it about five minutes and I called back and Christine said hello

hello hello I said I said I got one question and as I asleep she said yep I said don't wake him up we'll do it tomorrow all moving on no big deal like so at least you got some respect from us but on people we appreciate I guess in a roundabout way there I appreciated the farmers too thank you all for what farmers yep I'm just trying to think of the people that don't ever get no get no thanks look I'll tell you right now another one that gets the food service people when you actually go out

to eat thank goodness they're working you're right they got a job I've told a person another day, thank you for serving me. Absolutely. Well, no, no, no. People all over the country ain't working. It don't make no sense. Nowadays, employees deserve appreciation. Yeah, if you go to work.

If you go to work today, we appreciate you. Thank you. There's a guy who runs a company for his employees to show up every day. Thank you. The whole crew here. Jackie Hilbert, that includes you. I'm thankful for you, son. Like, I mean, but it's just something.

South got in sick today. Well, maybe he was sick. Oh, no, no. I don't know. What's 75 today? He may have been out there dipping his cricket in the water. But that's pretty bad, okay? They don't know if their workforce is going to come in today or not?

Oh, I know. Everybody that we work with. There's a lot of them out there. They have no idea that they're coming in today a month. I got a dude. He's a local business owner. I won't say the name of business. It's a great business.

He runs a great business. It's awesome. but he's paying people $20 an hour. What's his next? Just to show up. $20 an hour. What's he do? And they still don't show up.

Can I say? They do anything with that? I may need a side hustle. Now, who is it? You not to change the tire? No, I ain't very good at that. No, I am good at changing the tire. I just don't want to change other people.

I don't mind changing them all day. I don't mind picking up mine, but these folks around here got big tars. Now, I hurt my back. Oh, I don't think, say, yeah. It's my tire man. He was like, I'm trying to pay people out the way. $20 an hour, change tall. I was like, man, when I was in college, I was $5.15.

I'd probably do it. And they'd fire you if you just were 30 minutes late. I'd do it for $15 because I'd keep them lids off the old tires and take them home, melt them down, make jigheads. Yeah. Jigheads. Hey, it's good. That's good lead. That's good, soft lead.

That or roofing jacks. Keep on your mind. I look at that. It blows your mind, don't it? Yeah. Yeah. I used to, you know, I pushed a moor, lawmore when I was in high school. Yeah.

Five acres for $5. $5 acres. And look what it did to yours. Not a lot. Not a lot. Go, sigh. Tell us that. Oh.

How big is five acres? Five acres. How many cans of gas you go through that push mower to do that? Hey. Because a push mower get about 72 miles to the gallon. Yeah. Yard and a hang. Yeah.

Unless you're mowing. Because it had that big field. We played football. And the old woman that I did it for, she was always grabbing. The $5 was too much. Too high. Yeah.

Too high. You couldn't fill up a push mower these days. Not for $5. Not if you got a mix of gas. No, you're in trouble. But I look, you know, $20 a hour. For tar. Did you imagine?

And he's got jobs that are empty. And people are saying, well, I can't find a job. No, you ain't looking. You ain't looking. No, this guy, he ain't lazy. No. If you're looking to pay rent, you can find a job. Hey, if you say you can't find a job.

Somewhere. Hey, I got, I got, your, what I describe you as starts with an L. Lazy. Loser. No, liar. Lier. I think they all are, I think they all fit, though. You can always, hey.

Hey, I'm telling you. I'm telling you. There are so many businesses out there right now that have vacancies. Yeah, it is. Yeah, Brandon, this section is for you. Let's take a break. We'll be right back. We're going to appreciate the fans.

We're going to have a little section and a half, if you live. Section and a half. Of the inbox. All right. This first one, we're going to go quick on this one. Hold on. Hello at dot callroom.com just so we don't get asked. Email me, baby.

That is the email address if you've got things to say. But what's in there, Johnny? All right, this is a two-parter. First man that emailed in his name Jordan from Oklahoma. Jordan is living my life and it's freaking me out. He's living your life? He's 32 years old. What far are Oklahoma?

On the tackle shot? No, not that close. What part of Oklahoma? I don't know, just a regular part. Good country. Good country. Good country. I got a lot of friends.

So look, he's 32. He's been married for 10 years. I've been married 11. He has an 8 and a 4 and a 2 year old. I have a 7, 5, and 3 year old. No, I do not. want to babysit him and he has a 13 year old basset hound so me and this guy are just a lot of life oh y'all are living parallel i know it's all so unfortunately though his dog just passed away and i

emailed him back i'm like i'm pretty sure any day we're going to be feeling the same sadness um so that's jordan from oklahoma and that goes with another good question from easton which i thought we were going to be an agreement on the other day martin and were not more so Easton asks, do dogs go to heaven? Absolutely. Have you not seen the movie? That's a cartoon. It doesn't matter.

All dogs go to heaven, son? First off, what about a bad dog? He go up there, too? Jesus loves dogs. He's got to. Now, cats? I don't know about them. Yeah, see, they do that.

They do stuff like that. Well, I'm not saying all cats is out, but most of them is mysterious. Sweet fees, gum. My dog ain't making it to heaven. If I have to give an account, things he has done, he has done, he is not making it. As long as he ain't got to climb the stairs, he'll get there. You know, I've thought about that before. I often thought, really, I said, but really.

And I think there's going to be things in heaven that we enjoy. Well, absolutely. So why wouldn't they be there? But it would be like a dog with wings. That's fine. But I don't think your dog's going to go to heaven. I ain't going to gnaw the time. Me and Martin about it.

You're going to be there, happen. They ain't going to gnail the furniture no more. Well, no, it's made a goal. They hurt their teeth. They ain't no wood up there. Yeah. I reckon, too. I mean, how else is that grass going to be so green?

Look at all that fertilizer they're going to have. Think of all the stuff they got up there. Dogs, horse, now, if ducks is up there. I know we're going to eat. If ducks is up there. That's what I'm saying. So, like, there's going to be a duck walks up to you one day. It's like, hey, bro.

Why'd you trick me? And I'm going to say, did you see our YouTube? Why do you taste so good? Yeah. If you didn't taste so good, you wouldn't have got here so quick. That's right. If you'd have just been a little smarter, you'd have been there a little bit longer. But, I mean, yeah, there's going to be ducks.

But hey, man. I think there will be creatures. I don't know that the animals when they die here are going to. You can believe what you want to believe, but my dog going to heaven. I'm going to see that second again when I get there. Dogs. Hey, who says they ain't got there? Hey, out of all the things on this world that haven't disobeyed the order of things.

My dog disobeys the order of things every day. Absolutely not. He's a dog. Is he sinned against you? Very often. No, that's just because you punish his behavior. That don't mean he sinned against you. He hasn't wanted anything you wanted except for maybe your hot dog.

Did he love you? He didn't covet. Did he don't know what the law is? Did he love you unconditionally? Yes. Absolutely. He's there. Maybe Dublin will be a dog.

Look, there's a chance. ain't a human up there and all the dogs are going to be there there's a greater chance of that that the dogs and all the animals kept everything right and we down here screwing everything up i will agree with that you have won me up it takes a big man to admit when he was wrong and today i am that there is a greater chance of all the animals being like boy you shouldn't have put those two people with us they got a good thing going in that garden until they showed up and that won me over yes See, that's what I'm talking about. Look, you just got to believe in your argument.

There's going to be fish fries in heaven. Well, what about the fish? Now they did. Do you ever read the back end of loot? He took it and broiled it. Jesus ate fish after. Hey, look. Yeah.

That's going to be fish fries in heaven. There's going to be fish fries in heaven. Amen. Jason made that. John? Read it in John? Fish fry. Well, they, you know, after they killed him and

Peter went fishing. Hey, you boys got anything? Ain't that far on the bank? They said, hey, they gave them. They gave some fed fish. You know what my sign at the store says? What? Jesus ate fish.

Be like Jesus. That's right. Amen to that. That's what I'm told. Fissures of men and fishers. Now that we got that great debate settled, I would be interested for the fans. Do y'all think dogs go to help? Look.

I'm curious. I'm not a dog person. I have one and I love him. But it's like, eh. That's because you've got three kids take you time. As soon as they're going and gone, you're going to get you another hound. I think, one of things is you're going to be really shocked at what all's there that's what all it's

that's going to be part of the amazement amen i don't know i'm sure definitely heaven's going to be awesome you're going to walk around one of them corners that streets to go and stuff but i am going to feel low-key judged if there's a bunch of mallards up there they're going to be eyeball i know how they got there you see plenty of them yeah yeah that's a interesting i like you miss something boys well let's take a break hold on we'll get in it right after we get back These come in. Yep. What they are is their handmade wallets.

And the man that made them is Bob. Oh, Bob. Hey, you were so much your workmanship, son. Hey, if you ain't been doing it for about eight months, I think it's pretty good myself. You just got much myself. Hey, I tried that when I was in high school. Okay. Yeah.

Well, they got Eagles. Yeah. They got a turkey. I got, I got 240. I got two rifles, and I got two eagles. Yeah, two pistons. I've got a turkey. Ducks.

Trout. Got a big old buck deer on it. Buck deer on it. You got four geese. Got a cross on it. They look like speckled. They look like speckled at it. But Bob, here's a problem.

Mine didn't come with no money in it. Yeah. I did know. Mine come empty, Bob. Yeah, mine's a little light, Bob. Bob is. You sent a wallet, truth. to four and made that suckers in.

Bob, Bob said, hey, fellas, I made you want it to carry it. You didn't expect me to fill it up, did you? Well, I... Bob, it would have been a nice gesture if you'd put a little green in it. But we appreciate you making them for us. Amen. Thank you, Bob. Absolutely.

Appreciate it. Johnny D. What else in that end, Bob? I'm deep in the Bible solving our last... Hey, Bible solving. He's solving a problem. Solving our last segment, and I'm just in the wrong for sure now. Okay, first off, there's a girl. and she works with another girl,

and they always work together, and they always listen to our podcasts. Their names are Reagan and Caroline. This one's... Caroline always emails in. Reagan never does. And they email a lot of stuff. She's shy.

But Reagan has to tell Caroline something, and she's not going to tell her, and I'm going to tell her. Well, Caroline. Reagan... Let me tell both of them something. Hold on. Hey.

Send a picture. Well, uh-oh. Hey, I'll see what you guys look like, boys. All right, so. But, uh, Reagan is pregnant. That's why she's been getting sick at work in the morning. Boom, mind-blown.

Wait, hold on. Time out. Yeah, I just announced the girl's pregnancy to her best friend. Oh, to her best friend. And co-worker. Okay. So they're working right now, and they're like, wait, you're pregnant? She keeps giving her pepto-pest-a-bizmo, don't she?

But it's an awesome story because they've been trying for a super long time. That's awesome. They're praying and praying and done in vitro and all that stuff. And boom, they're pregnant. We're here. So congratulations, Reagan. Caroline, pick your jaw up off the ground. And that was kind of fun, I'm guessing.

That's right. And I got a question. Do we know what we're going to have yet? Well, no. No, but she said she's not naming the... She might. You open your first. Not if she's still in that sickness phase.

Well, okay. Here's the deal. The only... Congratulations, darling. The only thing she wants you to know... She's not naming that baby, Jason Silas. Praise God. Well, I don't blame her.

I wouldn't name a girl at either. Me either. All right. And now on to the next one. Where is this person's name? I don't know. You can call me Sharpie. Sharpie?

All right, Sharpie. He's 16. He's from Sutton's Bay, Michigan. Ooh, I'm facing to go to Florida, Michigan. Sutton Bay. Sutton's Bay. That's where he's at. And he's in a love triangle, boys, and he needs advice.

Here's the thing. He joined a youth group of church. he's going to be honest. The reason he joined it, the girl was hot, he called her beautiful. If you're listening, he said beautiful. And he kind of just joined up to meet her specifically.

But God has a funny way of working things out. I like his style. I'm uncomfortable. No, I like his style. We're talking about a love triangle in church. Oh, yeah. Wait for it, wait for it.

Okay. Well, I love triangles, a hard word. There might not even be, she might not like either of them. So here's the deal. So he's found a bunch of friends. He's gotten involved with youth group. He loves the youth group. He loves going to church. It's awesome.

But he's got a crush on the girl still. Uh-oh. I just made his new friend. He's got a crush on the girl. Same girl. Bad news. They're friends. That's bad news. Everybody knows what's going on. Friendship ain't on the last long, boys. Which one of you's bigger. So he values all the new friendships.

But he doesn't know how to go about the manner since he likes her, he likes her. I don't know who she likes, which is a very important part of the equation. I'm going to tell you something that my granddad told me. Uh-oh. His granddad's been. It's time to either poop or get off the pot. Oh, boy. But that's where you're at.

That's where you at. That's where you at. So he doesn't know, like, well. The worst thing she is going to say is no. But he doesn't want to go after her and then hurt his friend's feelings. Well, hey, you got to make up your mind. He ain't gone after his friend is. You can't be wishy-washy.

Well, what's going to happen is both of you're going to be over there so timid and shy. Ain't neither one of you going to get her. Then y'all talk about the one that got away like a dad gum fishing trip. Some guy's going to walk in and say, hey, you want to go get a pizza and make out? And she's going to laugh. If two guys in the same youth group got a crush on the same girl, first of all, there's got to be a bigger town closer to you. More girl. Yeah, I mean.

More fish in the sea, boys. What's to give up? You're not giving up, Frank. Sharpie. That's the one. Sharpie, go, son. All right, Sharpie, I got an example. Uh-oh.

There was a young girl named Allison in the youth group. Uh-oh. I had three kids with her. Much later in life. I married the woman, but I had a very good friend who liked her, too. But I knew she liked me. Short story, he don't talk to that friend no more, but he got the girl. That's not the short story.

But I did call my friend and said, here's the deal. I didn't ask for permission or anything like that. I said, this is going to happen. I would like us to still be friends because, but I'm just letting you know me and old girl going to get married and have a happy life 10 years, three kids later. And me and that dude are still friends.

He lives in a different town now, but he was like, you know what, it's okay. You're running about that. You might think it's a bigger deal than it really is. And if you're just up front and have open and honest communication, which is Martin's favorite line, I love it.

Probably way easier than you think. Communication is the keys of success, boys. but I wouldn't talk to him. Not till after the deed. Yeah. Not the deed. Don't give away your gameplay. Once you know she's into you, just go say, hey man, here's a deal.

I want to still be your buddy, but I'm also going to date your girl. Yeah. Because she's my girl. And it's hashtag Make Out Monday is Johnny D likes to call it. Here's the next one. Carissa. Carissa. 30-year-old woman.

I'm in a youth group at church, and I got these two boys that like me. And I don't like either of them. No, that's not true. Come on, Sharpie. We're rooting for you. one I like has got a boyfriend or their girlfriend already. Like, shoot! No, no.

Youth love triangles. They're great. All right. This is a single 30-year-old woman who works at a child development center. Hey, another appreciative Shemba. Absolutely, thank you. Take care workers. Love it. That's awesome. She discovered our podcast back in October. Y'all are awesome and hilarious. By the way, Saiz my favorite. Lady, we already knew that.

Mine too. Here's her question. How do you come up with things to talk about on your podcast and do you ever run out of ideas? No, we just sit down and start talking about. I mean, sometimes we... Sometimes are a little longer. I mean, sometimes we go off script. Oh, this is not a script, by the way.

This is typically nothing. Yeah, no, we sit down on that morning box. We sit down and start talking. Okay, we're baking. Yeah, we literally just sit down and start, like, every once in a while I'll text Martin and say, I don't understand. I've got a lot of shorts going on in a lot of.

my head. Lexical shorts. Oh, thank God. Hey, whatever it, that brings up something. All right, I got two Bible verses. I hit it. What one do you want?

Do you want? I want both of them. Animals in heaven, or do you want Jesus eating fish? Luke 24. There you go. Luke 24, when he had said this, he showed them his hands and feet. And while they did not

and while they still did not believe it because of joy and amazement, he asked them, hey you got anything to eat they gave him a piece of broiled fish they gave him a piece of mustard fried Doritos sour cream croppy and he took it

and ate it in their presence yes sir Jesus ate fish and I'm doing the other one real fast just because my mind's blown Isaiah 116 this whole chapter is kind of a picture of heaven the wolf also shall dwell with the lamb

and the leopard shall lie down with the kid and the calf and the young line and the fatling together and a little child shall lead them we're going to be playing with animals in heaven and zagg'll get a black panther to follow it everywhere it goes now he'll be riding that sucker all right now we'll see y'all next time right here