Duck Call Room - Uncle Si & His Wife Made a Gut-Wrenching Choice for Their Daughter

Episode Date: July 18, 2023

Uncle Si’s personal fact-checker Christine dishes the goods on subjects like Si’s military career, his fame, some of his fatherhood blunders and their upcoming, action-packed tropical vacation. Si remembers the last time he was in Hawaii for ‘Duck Dynasty’ and the results of his surfing lessons. Phillip recalls the time Si and Christine didn’t wake up from their naps even though Phillip was afraid their plane was about to crash! John-David also has some horror stories from the skies during his time as Willie’s assistant. Phillip and John-David lose their minds over some of Si and Christine’s shenanigans in Germany, one of which resulted in them leaving their daughter behind in a foreign country! These days, she can’t help but sing her dad’s praises to all of her students. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey, I'm sitting I'm right now. We're in here. It's Duck Call Room. Welcome to the Duck Call Room. Episode 259, which is insane. And it has the potential to be my favorite episode we've ever done. Already?

Yes, because you want to know why. We have a special game. The fact checker is here. The fact checkers here. We threw Martin out, and we have the lovely Miss Christine Robertson in the building with us today. Welcome, welcome. Thank you. Thank you.

I don't think she wants you to ring a bell to introduce you. There's trauma there. There is trauma. Welcome. There we go. There we go. We just welcome you. I might need it later.

We might need it later. Hey, look, we got Ms. Christine in the building with Si. We have lots of questions. You know, we never get all the answers we need about, Si. So we got more questions just to ask you to. But y'all recently went on a trip. All y'all? Ms. Christine was on this?

No. This was in Colorado. We went and signed at an event. and Creed, Colorado. With the hellfighters. They literally fight the devil and the demon. That is a cool plane. That is a cool plane.

Ms. Christine, why didn't you go on that? Oh, I don't take long trips unless it's for fun. That was three and a half hours on that plane. I'm on Ms. Christine's side on that one. That's a long ride. But this is the Hellfighter. There's a, hellfighters off road, y'all. 67 Mustang.

That's 289 on the hood. Yeah. Orange car, or gold color. Perfect mint condition. Okay. This beautiful car. They picked, they picked side of the airport in this car.

In that car. For the event, that was funny. But, hey, I want to talk about this a little bit, okay, because these two people, I met them about, me and Philip met him about, oh, what, five or six years ago? Yep, yep. Okay. And they are, both of them are extraordinary people. Yep.

Jenna's his wife and Richard, okay, which he's at home with Jesus right now. Okay. And Gina went with us on the trip. Yeah, and she went with us. Yeah. So Richard wrote this book before he passed away, succumbed to cancer, okay? Life, a most wonderful gift, how to keep your joy until your miracle happens. Jenna just sent this to me.

And I couldn't put it down. Let me see the cover. I've read half of that book and it was really good. No, no, it's wonderful. Okay. And I really didn't realize how many promises God gives us. This book is full of them. Okay.

But this man fought cancer and he's got a bucket list fulfilled right here. 101. Of his bucket list? On the bucket list. It's the wild. this bucket list. Yeah. Is ride a giraffe on there?

Because that's on yours. No, but he did everything else beside that. Okay. You want to ride a giraffe? Yeah. Don't you see me? There you are. I got to be up there and see.

He didn't like it down low. But anyway, these two people have impacted my life. Okay. Because, you know, the big C got him. Okay. and he never gave in or gave up.

Okay, he was the same man all the way through it, and he's got, what a resume of a life on here. He's changed a lot of people's life with his hellfighters that they started. He was the founder of hellfighters, okay. International hellfighters. Which he takes people that are drug addicted, alcohol, all kinds of problems, okay. They have a place for them to live. they actually train them and give them a,

put them an apprentice program on mechanics. Okay. Teach them how to rebuild engines and fix everything with cars and motorcycles. Yeah. So they've done a lot to help a lot of people. But it was just their, you know, this book is about all being positive about everything. That fits your mantra.

What's that look for, Miss Christine. The plane ride. The plane ride. Oh, the plane. I'll bring that up in a minute. You were not positive. Yeah.

So I'll tell you about. What plane ride? No, no. No one of, we'll go by that in a minute. Let me tell you about Mr. Richard. When me and Cy met him, it's a funny story, he had a big guy with him, bigger than Martin. This guy's Michael.

Big Mike. Yep. It's a good name for a big guy, big Mike. Yeah. So this, Mr. Richard was just awesome. He was such a servant. He taught me in a short while that I knew him for just a few years how to be more of a servant. He waited on all of us at the table.

This is a man that's a billionaire. Yeah. Okay. That was his plane? That's his plan. You don't get a plane without having a little spending money. A little spending money. Yeah.

So when we were saying the prayer for the food, I said the prayer first. And then when we started to leave, Si, said, Philip, say a prayer for all of us and our travels and our trip and what did he say and he said he said philip and i know you say a good prayer now you say a good he said you say a good prayer but he said i'm going to ask you to let michael do it because when michael says the prayer god stops what he's doing immediately and listens okay so hey he does no no so look this guy starts and yeah that's right because because he looks up and he says lord this me again the sinful sorry as thing sorry as man you've very you've very ever seen your life.

I don't deserve it. I don't deserve it. He went on and on and on. And it was a good prayer, y'all. They do a good job at Hellfighters. They're in, where are they at, Mississippi? Laurel, Mississippi. Laurel, Mississippi.

That's where their main office is. And so now in Creed, Colorado, we were there because they're doing Hellfighters off-road. And so it's kind of a different thing that they're doing and going in a direction. So that's why they invite us to go. and do that. But they're awesome. They're wonderful people. Now, we loved you, Gina.

We appreciate everything that you're doing. Miss Christine brought up something about a plane. And if I had... Was that this plane? No. No, it was another plane. Oh, a different plane. Similar plane.

Prop job, but it was another plane. But I'm going to tell you, you don't know what I'm talking about until you've been in this situation. Here's what they didn't hear, okay? Christine, Cy and Alicia, here's what they didn't hear. Lean forward, Johnny D. When the pilot grabbed my shirt, he said, Philip, we're going down.

Yeah. He said, we're going down? He said, Philip, we're going down. I need you to hand me my glasses, my sun glasses out of there because the window has popped because of... And you want to look cool when you crash in a plane? No, he don't want the charge of glass hitting him in the eyes. He said, we're going to go down and we're going to lose consciousness. But when we get under 10,000 feet,

we're going to wake back up. And I was like, huh? And he said, go and make sure everybody got their belts on and try to be cool, you know. Boy, and you failed. As he said that, I was like ready to jump out. Look, I was afraid he was fixing to have an aneurysm bust on his, on the side of his.

Yes. Because his artery, what is, A artery? Yeah, close enough. Yeah. You know, I thought it was going to blow up, okay? Tell him how I woke you up. So he wakes me up out of a sound sleep and tells me this story. Which makes sense that you were asleep.

No, no. And he tells me this story and I said, wait a minute. I said, why did you even bother waking me up? I said, and tell me the story that I'm going to pass out first. I said, then you go, then I'm going to wake back up just in time to witness to crash. size's got a great point here don't wake me up in that moment let me just crash and die

I'm a rule follower I'm just doing what I'm told so so the plane's in trouble clearly yeah yeah and everybody else is cool Miss Christine you were on this plane yes yeah he talks to her

and she says I go to put her seatbelt on and she said she's reading her book and she said she gave me that honey I said miss Christine I need to put your seatbelt on I go and she was like, Philip, calm down. We all gonna die at some point.

And then I heard that, they were ready for judgment day. You need to get some things off your chair. I must have more, a lot of to live for it. Then I said, at least my wife will back me up. I said, Alicia, I need to put more belts on you. You got to put all that. And she said, honey.

Yeah, because you just got the lap belt on. You can put all straps. Shoulder strap. She said, honey. our kids are grown, we're going to be fine, don't worry. I said that's it. I'm the only one here that has anything to live for. So I just sit there like this.

So now you're mad. Everybody else is just like headed to meet Jesus and you're like, I'm not ready. He's all alone. He's by himself. I'm all alone. Well, you're all still alive. Did you pass out? No.

No. So he just knew that the outer window, the person, pressure was going to pop it as well. Because the internet went already popped. But he said it's very likely that we're fixing to go down. So when he started dropping altitude and it couldn't happen fast enough. It seemed like four hours. It was probably 20 minutes, I mean.

Probably five. I was sweating it. And finally when we get down, I don't know how far down we are. I just send Jason text. I said, hey, thanks for sharing the gospel with me and my wife. Me and I'm sorry. Pray for us. Pray for us.

We're going down. You don't send that either because now Jason's freaking out. No, he didn't. He didn't. He didn't look it out. He said, I don't know what Philip and Sauer are doing. They said something about going down. He said, who's part of it is anyway? That's playing golf.

Loving, love you. They never checked up. He was like, I mean, yeah. It's a weird. Weird. He'll say, they're going down. That's about. Crazy.

I don't know. Well, I'm glad you're alive. We did survive. But I'm going to tell you, when we landed and they had another plane for us to get on to, they all went and got on the plane. And I was like, I don't think I can do it. Yeah. Who all was just, just the four of you?

Yeah. So the newspaper would have said Uncle Si's wife and two others dead today in a crash. No nasty star, his wife and two others. Three unknowns, the pilot. You would have been included in the three others. I'll have been the unknown. Hey, and that's okay.

But for now, we're going to take a quick break. We'll be right back. All right. springtime is here it's warming up you know what that means that means more outside cooking and y'all know we love to eat beef around here and that's what because of our friends over at try tails beef makes such a good product ain't it good it's so good it's our friend sall robertson would say buy on the grill look before we got tritels getting ready for a cookout man somebody had to run the grocery store do all the things grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day and you

never really know where that beef comes from but with trytails beef we skip the grocery store and do it a different way try tales comes from a family ranch out in texas they're a fifth generation american ranch so they've been at it for a while now look the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door we threw a couple of ribbys on the grill look salt pepper garlic hot fire that's all you need look because i tell you what when the beef for people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference.

The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Triedails Beef. I know in size case, Christine loves it, which is just a she doesn't eat meat. She isn't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash.

That's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. Me and Willie were on a weird situation like that once that I was losing my mind. It was scary. Yeah, we were on there, and the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, time that we were losing pressure, but that was wrong. And we look up, and one of the pilots has done put on, he, he looked like Tom Cruise in Top Gun,

the first one, and the second, he like, and I was like, oh, he's already production on. Oh, yeah, he was like, hey, he turned around and said, boys, we're about to drop fast. We'll get you on the ground, because he's got this fighter mask on, but if y'all pass out, we'll see, on the ground and I just looked at Willie. I was like, well, see you on the ground. Maybe. Maybe. Then I sent my life attacks and said, I'm dead. Good knowing you. Not really. That's a weird thing to sin. Like, were you sending to J's? Yes. I knew we were going to die. I don't know. Maybe I'm skeptical.

Well, Phil, for me to die's gain in Christ Jesus, although still scary when in a plane. Anyways, enough about plane crashes because that's terrifying. you're on a plane listening. Sorry. Where is seatbelt? Pull up. What is that?

That's what it says when you get too low. Miss Christine, Cy was telling us, you recently went river dancing? Well, I went to a river dance concert. How was that? It was in Dallas. Hack checker.

I thought it was in Houston. No. Any attention, man. Where does Tracy Lee live? She lives in Fort Worth. All right. Dallas is right. All right. So how was it? It was gorgeous. I mean, the costumes, the dancing. It was just so awesome and beautiful to watch. Okay. Why do you not take side with you to those? No. You're talking about for now. I'm going there to a river dance.

No. We ain't even going near a river. You have a river dancing. He wants to river fish. Right, right. The only place I can take him is family. Family? You don't take him out on the town? Oh, no.

No. But recent... I have to go somewhere else. You have to go. So y'all don't go out to fancy... No. Restaurants, river dancing. No.

No. No. No. She went to Alaska without me. Yep. The best trip she's ever had, she told me. He said, yep. Oh, I'm a good husband.

Hey, go take your trip. Excellent heaven. Go and take your husband. Have a good time. Did you want to go to Alaska? No, I've been to Alaska, so no, I didn't care. I really want to go up there and gold mine. No, yeah.

You look like one. No, no, I'm serious. Because every time I fly up in Alaska, I always look where the streams are running down the mountains. Mm-hmm. And, hey, I'd say, if I could just get there with a pan, I could find some gold. I mean. Hey. He looks.

You look like every cartoon gold miner I've ever seen. Oh, no. Hey, I need to be. Same beer. I need, I should have done it when we lived in Alabama. Is there a lot of gold in Alabama? Oh, yeah, yeah, because look, ever, all your mind is to tell you, where you got a lot of black sand, there's gold. And, and Paint Rock River was full of black sand.

There's gold. Is it still there? Oh, yeah, still there. I lived there for four years, and I should have been painting the whole time. I'd probably be a billion down by now. Aren't you part of a rather large television show all about finding treasure? Well, yeah, but they ain't done that. They ain't listening to you on the box.

Don't you have an assistant that will help you? Yeah. Well, he can't, he can't help that either. You should make that. I got a bunch of losers. They ain't finding the gold yet. They ain't found the gold. They ain't found the gold, pa.

Well, recently, because I was there and saw y'all both did go. out on the town and we all watched a movie together. Oh, yes. Miss Christine, you were there. I was there. I've gone on and on about it. Phil's gone on. And we was looking good, both of us.

You were. You were dressed up. They said there was a red carpet and I was nervous because I don't really have red carpet clothes in the repertoire. And then they told me I didn't have to do that, which was, but y'all went full red carpet. Oh, yeah. I always do.

Yeah. People expect me to be. Yes. I would like to know what Christine thought about it and then also what Tracer and two of your grandchildren came, correct? Yes. I want to know what they thought about it too. Well, they were both interested in it and excited to see it on film.

But like myself, they pointed out, that's not dad. Or that's not poom-paw. Yeah. So I didn't wear glasses. Until old age? until 1972. He's still in his 30

I mean 20s. Okay. So they added the glasses Yeah. Visual. So you'll know who he is I guess you'll know who he is again. Uh-huh.

Yeah, I guess you had to be a little lenient with it. Well, yeah. Everybody said they loved my character. I know. In the movie. Only on the movies.

Yeah, well, I'll just say, I love your character in person. Well, everybody loves all the time. Oh, yeah. But other than the glasses. Sometimes too much. Other than the glasses. You can't look.

somebody too much. You can't if he's married, leave me alone. That's right. Oh, he ain't? Hey. I don't know where we go. These other women. Uh-oh.

Well, I've always been a woman's band. No. Oh, yeah. Before he met you, Christy. Sight, you're about to get in trouble. Oh, no, it never stopped. Oh, you're always in trouble? Okay, good.

Yeah, I'm always in trouble. This isn't new. I'm getting nervous. You're the counselor here. You ain't got but red hair for nothing. You know what happens when I go. go and talk to them about anything, they just blow me off.

Don't mean nothing. No. Don't mean nothing. But other than the glasses, did you enjoy the movie? Yes, I did. Okay. How many people do y'all figure was there?

At the, at the... 350. 50? Okay. 350 is what I thought. So, because I recognize... Bath's shaking her head. No, is that...

That was a... 250, hey. He's a salesman. Bible sales. Fact checker. Okay, hey. Yeah, that was a 250 years. But why do you say that,

well, because I recognize. everybody that was there. Oh, yeah. That one way or the other, everybody was impacted with everybody that was there. Yeah. And had relationships with them.

You know? Because Jay's, when he was in high school, he graduated, you know, and then he said, well, hey, I should have done it while I was in class with them, but I didn't. But since now that I graduated,

he said, I'm fixed to preach the gospel to every classmate I had. And I see you. In high school. And hey, they went on a run. Jace, him, Blake, a bunch of others. They went on a run for like four years.

Yeah. You know, and they went everywhere. If they had to, they would go to a pool hall and Jason would put a $20 bill in and said, okay, here's the deal. If you can beat my man, you get this $20 bill. But if he beat you, you get a $20 bill. Bible study.

Were you the pool player? No, Kevin McIntosh. McIntosh. Oh, Magintosh. Yeah. So they, they were just, any, any reason and any way, they did everything they could do, you know, to preach the gospel. And they, and hey, he preached it to every one of them.

And now all you got to do is go sit in the room by his dad and about a 200,000 people listen to them every time they have a Bible study, which is even crazier to think about. Oh, no, because for the fourth of July, that's, that. Sunday, okay, you know, what day it was, but they baptized 19 at church. And then they went to the plantation. Jace had a family, faith, and freedom. Freedom, okay. And they baptized 40 out there.

So that's about 60 people that got, you know, God's families growing. Yeah. So which was awesome. Yeah, that's really cool. So I can remember a couple 4th of Julys ago. We were in Oklahoma, and you got up and gave a good, a nice sermon. Yeah, we had a horse trough. We had a horse trough.

We baptized five, but it was good. But it was good. But it was good. That's awesome. Well, we're going to take another break, and we'll be back. Ms. Christine, you're taking Si on a vacation? Because we already found out you're out on Alaska. You didn't get to go there, but you didn't really want to.

Where are y'all going? We're going to Maui. Hawaii. Hawaii. You're going to Hawaii? He doesn't really want to go. The grass skirts. But I told him that we're not getting any younger.

So we should take our trips with people we love when we can. That makes sense. So are you excited about going to Hawaii? I'm not the one taking him, Randy and Cheryl from Oklahoma. But you're letting him go. Yeah. It's us and the McMillans. Hey, let me tell you how sneaky, yeah, let me tell you how sneaky Christine is.

Now, we're, so I thank you for the first class flights everywhere we go. But me and Alicia, not to Hawaii. And these two, we're going somewhere else. We are going to Hawaii. Are you going first class? Yeah. Oh, you are big. Well, hey, look who I'm hanging out with.

It's a free trip. It's a free trip. Anyway, that's a good point. So I have my seat lean back, you know, and it's supposed to be up. And Christine rats me out. she snitches me out because that lady said sir leading your seat up and i look back there and christine's you told on him you already trained to be a roof on her you got to be a brazil you got to walk the line when you're miscaratine you got to obey you right sturdis he wasn't listening i wasn't listening

they're there for your safety but you know what we're going to do we're going to do the uh zip line zip line christine'll do it she's already been parasailing and and we went to see the, in Belize we went to the Mayan ruins. Right. Yeah, we've done some really cool stuff. Si, you're going zip lining? Oh, no.

Cy ain't going. Probably not. Why not? Everybody else is going. No. I don't think it'd be good on his lungs. Hey. Too much excitement?

No, I don't know zip line. Now, I might do the parasailing. Yeah, y'all should do that. Yeah, y'all should do that together. Because that is take off and then cranky it. I'll let you down. I will take the GoPro. Yeah, you need a...

We'll get some good footage. You, see, I would go ziplining before I went parasails. No, no, I won't be up in there. Have you seen Jurassic Park 3? No. No, that's like... Parasailing didn't end good for that.

No, no, because the reason I'm going to do parasailing a little case is that when I was in the military, me and a buddy of mine got bored. So we said, well, let's go join, let's go airborne. Uh-oh. So we go to watch an airborne event.

Okay. So the helicopter, you know, the guys get on it, they go up and they get up there where it's supposed to be, barely can see it look like a mosquito. And the first one out, okay, he jumps out, his chute opens, then closes, and he's doing this,

coming down, okay? He rips that in the way and lets it go and pulls his secondary shoot. Well, it does the same thing, and all the way down. Needless to say, we did not go airborne that day. Wow. Y'all saw that?

Although, yeah, it landed, and look, there's a bunch of high school students. He landed in the water? Sitting in not, no, sitting in the stands. No, no. And look, I mean, hey, he's got, you know, all the way down. Yeah. So that's why I said, no, since they actually let you up

and then crank you back down. You don't jump out of a plane. okay you do this on a boat you need a tether tied yeah yeah yeah so i'm gonna i'm gonna do that just to say i okay i've been passionate oh hey hey bucket list no no because my daughter okay tracela she went tam him you know she's jumped out of a plane right yeah yeah and she said it was a of a hoot she loved it everybody that does that says that no no i'm never gonna be Well, no, no, you got to understand. I don't think I can do it.

I've always watched, I watch everything out when I'm out hunting that flies. It's got to be, it's got to be, you know, you're talking about free. There's a difference between flying and falling. Yeah, there's when you're free, though. Okay, it's when you're flying. Ms. Christine, have you ever jumped out of an airplane? Nope. Don't intend to either.

Me neither. Oh, I ain't going to jump out of a pretty good, you know, just fairly, you know, decent plane. It's flying. Paraseling was. Now, I'm going to ride it to the bottom, boy. You've done that before, huh? Yeah, Lush and I did it. Okay.

I'm going to do it. I'm going to do that. Yeah. Because that way all you do, just sit on something and then they crank you up, and then they crank you back down and let you get out of the boat. I'm so excited for this. It's actually the same. And I'm not even going to be there.

And we're going to swim with the dolphins. Yeah. It's the same hotel, same place. Yeah. That we was at for Duck Dynasty. Yep. Okay. Yeah.

Would you rather swim with dolphins or ride a giraffe? Both. No, no, I want to swim with dolphins because they're cool. Well, yeah, they're dolphins. That was like when, well, what's Hawaii did? Hawaii. Look, and I'm in, I'm in, on a surfboard, they want us to try surfing. Oh, you did pretty good.

I saw you on TV. Well, no, no, so I'm out there and I'm sitting on this surfboard, and something catches my eye, and it's right next to my surfboard. No. Look, it's a giant sea turtle. Okay, that's okay. Okay. Hey, I'm talking about big of this thing right here.

And he comes up. He comes up and he's right there and I'm petting this stupid thing. Not supposed to do that. Hey. Look, he come up there to see me and I'll pet him. And the lady that was my swimmer to keep me safe, she said, what is it with you, Robertson? She said, I live in the ocean. This is what I do for a living.

I live in it. And she said, that's the first time I've ever seen a sea turtle come up. You know, you're sitting there petting him like he's a pet dog. And I said, well, hey, what can I tell you? You're like Aquaman. Hey, that's it. Yeah. So did y'all swim with the Dolphers last time?

No. Okay. But I'm going to have this time. We're going to need video. When is this? Is this coming soon? August. Got to need videos.

In August, I think. No. The middle. The middle. The middle. Middle? The middle. 12 through 19.

I was thinking it was in August. Nope. Mm-mm. Well, anyway, we're going to swim with the dog. And we're going to do all. Randy's got all him and Cheryl's got all this planned out. Yeah. I got it all planned out.

We're going to go see the waterfalls. We're going to see a, they're going to have a, what's it called at night when they're a louisle. Yeah, we had that one. Dasty. Roast a pig. Roast the pig. Yeah, roast a pig on the ground.

That is so interesting. Are you going to dance? Are you going to throw fire in the air and spin the baton? No. But you will dance I will dance It's beard's too uneven To really plant out the fire batons

Oh no No you don't do that No it's very dangerous That's dangerous That is true All right Well we're gonna Now that we know

That y'all are going on Hawaii I'm so excited for you That's gonna be awesome It's gonna be fun Y'all end up with traveling with her a lot And you tell people that's Paula Dean Do people take pictures with her? Oh yeah

Oh yeah You're mean Why hey People go home and say Hey look who I got a picture picture with i met paula dean and sigh robertson and somebody's like that's not paula dean she's better looking than paula dean and she's a lot more fun paula d'all way more fun way more and she's got a magic purse right there that's what magic purse i'll let siret say

you about the why is it magic anytime i play poker she brings the magic purse so if i run out of money i just says hey abracadabra abacadabra i'm broke again oh boy some people have too much Much money. I think there might be a thing. That's hilarious. So y'all have been all over the world together. No, not the Far East. Okay. Y'all have been all over the Western Hemisphere together.

I went over there by myself. Yeah, you went to Vietnam. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's not one you want to. That's a bummer. Tag along with it. I hear it rains. Yeah, that's what.

Hey, oh, no. Hey. You don't, yeah. No. You're who I heard it from. I have to say, well, no, no, because I always have to say, okay, you've never lived near a river or you've never been to Vietnam if you don't believe in the flood. Because if you had been to Vietnam and seen during monsoon season,

you'd believe in the flood, trust me. It's a good point. Because, hey, it ain't, it ain't, you know, this is not rain drops. This is Forrest Gump. Yeah, this is not rain drops. Was that accurate? This is a wall of water falling. Just buck it.

No, no, I'm serious. You would think you was under a, what is a waterfall? Yeah. You would think you was under a huge waterfall. So not like a shower. No, no. Hey, this is, I mean, hey, when you can make 300 men that are in formation disappear, now that's rain.

That's a rain. Okay. I mean, hey, I ain't talking about just, oh, no. they're blurry. No, they disappear because it's just a wall of waterfall. That's crazy. It's insane. It really is. I haven't seen that.

Did you all have formations in Vietnam? Yeah, of course we did, darling. That's kind of silly. I know. Well, hey, I'm just saying, hey, the army is silly a lot. Oh, boy. So did you have your cup the whole time? The whole time. Where did you put it? Where'd you put it?

Where did it? His back pocket. Where your butt used to be? Yeah. Yes. All you would hear was the first hour of scream, Rob, give you that stupid cup wax up! And I said, top, you ain't called us to attention yet.

Chill out. When he was in Vietnam and in Fort Knox, the uniforms were solid green. And they didn't have any of these side pockets that the camo has. So he stuck it in the back pocket. He would have to keep switching his billfold, though, because when he'd set down, he'd get wet.

He didn't have any cushion. Cushing back there. So he would run, he would get blisters. So he had to switch his billfold back and forth and the tea glass back and forth. No, no.

Hey. He's standing up. I don't know. Now you're a front pocket billfold man? Hey, no, no. I don't. Yes. I never have put this back here.

Why not? You're used to. Hey, you sit and flop. Lopsided. Not enough cushion back there? No enough cushion. So, hey, I'm wearing, and not on that. Pickpockets can't pickpocket me.

You sure? I'll pause. I'm stealing his wallet one day soon. Except you were in your back pocket while you're in the military. No, I didn't. I changed it. I changed it. You changed it, but later in life.

I changed it. I'm on her side on this one. So of all the places y'all have lived, where was your favorite, Ms. Christine? I would have to be Germany. Germany. the food the best one was I took them

bad move she can make him stop grab his hands Christine no no you gotta understand every year I hunted with the Germans the Haas

so every year I would go to the Swiss Alps to hunt rood deer did you yodel no but anyway so one year I was getting ready to do it And they said, well, you know, I would like to see the Swiss Alps, you know.

And I said, really, y'all want to go? You know, there's this one we had our first child. It was Bavaria. Yeah, Bavaria. So we go down there and they're going to go walking, okay? Well, I come back after hunting, you know, it's dark. And, hey, Christine and the kids are nowhere to be found. No, no, no, you had Scott.

Huh? You had Scott. Oh, that's right. Scott went on. Oh, yeah. So her and my daughter are lost. It's dark. Where y'all?

Yeah, they lost. They've been walking around. They lost. I have no idea where they had. We're on a mountain. You don't want out of me. So what did you do? Hey, man, the guy, the guy, he starts driving around, calling friends,

and they finally show up late by like 10.30, 11 o'clock at night. And I said, hey, don't ever go out. walking. And all the time he's looking, trying to stay calm and everything. Scott's egging him on. Yeah. Talking about men in the woods.

They run up on the steel killer. Yes. That's what's happened. They've been killed by a serial killer. What? That's Scott being Scott. Hey, what happened? Where do you get that from?

Oh, Scott has an imagination. Tell, where to get that from. Tell J.D. about the time Scott came up missing and y'all didn't know where he was. and when you found him and where? They're trying to remember which time. I know, because there was more than one. This has to do with the one-armed bandit. Oh.

Oh. You got to understand something, okay? In my military career, I stayed in trouble so much that everybody knew Sergeant Robertson and his family. So look, I'm at work, and the general comes walking in. He says, you have any idea what's your son? is and I said school I said he should be in school sir he said he's not I said oh I said well where is he and he said I give you three guesses yeah how old was he what first grade I think wasn't it

I think he was seven so yeah yeah first grade and you know I said sir I have no idea my son is so crazy it ain't no telling where he's at. He said, well, he's at the Officers Club, and apparently he's doing very, very good at the one-armed bandits because he just hit the jackpot. Oh, he's playing slot?

Oh, yeah, he's playing slot at the darned officers club. And he hit the jackpot? Oh, yeah. And I'm saying, well, I said, sir, you're I said, come on. You're pulling my leg, right? He said, unfortunately, no, sir, no, Sergeant Robertson, I'm not.

Go get you. your son and get him in school. How much money did he win? And cash him out. Oh, no. Yeah, cash him out, y'all. No, he couldn't keep the money. They didn't let him keep it? Oh, yeah. Oh, no, they took it from him. Oh, that is... Yeah, that was the bad part about it.

You got to be 18. Well, they should have checked that before he walked in. He's sitting up there. Once you win, that's yours. Well, here's what happened. How much money would it have been? Oh, hey, he had a big jackpot, so it's pretty good cash. But anyway, he went to the school. building and the doors were locked.

So he said. He said. Allegedly. Allegedly. He was seven. Okay. So the next thing, hey, you know, the school was right by the officers club.

So, hey, he just strolled in an officer club and had him a few quarters, you know. He found $10 bill. No. On the sidewalk. That's what he was using. Where was this at? Zwebrook and Germany. Why?

Bribuque and Germany. Germany sounds awesome. except you get gay child he should change that rule i never could figure out why they sent me there because the first time i was there three days there you got to think about it's three days i'm not even checked in good gooden mogen yeah you know i'm not in c doich i'm not in it yeah not very good anyway he understood that look that was a real sentence three days and hey me and the colonel

of the GS-12 start hitting heads. Shocker. Yeah. Shock of all. Over nap time? No, but it would just say

that cup. Yeah, pitiful. Yeah, but they kept, every time I would do a four-year tour over there and come back,

then the next thing I know, I'm back there again. And I said, wait a minute, what's wrong with this picture? When I get here, I get in trouble, and I stay in trouble,

the whole four years I'm here, and then, what do y'all do when I get back to the world? Y'all send me to the same stupid place again. What's going on here? Christine, how did you help him through it? She didn't. All she would say, she said, you're so stupid.

Hold his hands for me so I can talk to you, Christine. There you go. Anything you want to ask her, go ahead. He won't interrupt. He knows better now. That will shut him down. He can't talk. The first time she did is me.

The first time she did is me. I was saying something to her and my mind was blank. I couldn't even talk. He forgets who he is. Yeah. That's funny. I said, what in the world? Did you all ever live in Frankfurt, Germany? No.

No. We lived in Swabrookin. We lived in Bomb Holder and I think it. We lived in Swabrookin twice. Well, we'd live there for like 10 years. We lived there twice. I know. I'm serious. Ten years? Yeah. They kept just sending me there.

Because my granddaddy was in the army the same time as you, I would just love to know if he ever yelled at you. No. Because I think he would have. Oh, I got yelled at all the time. By anybody named Owen? Get in line. The second time we went.

Yeah, I'm serious. I'm serious. Joe Owen? Man, if my granddaddy ever yelled at him. No, no. Hey, I knew Joe. I loved him. Probably.

I remember Owens. Yeah. I'm nervous. The second time we went to Germany. White Burger. When the orders came down when we were at Fort Bragg, Sai was in class. So they told me when we were going to have to be there,

and I said, well, he can't. He doesn't graduate school until, you know, several weeks after that. So they said, okay. And next thing you know, they just changed the date. We were still going back to White Brook in Germany. Well, as soon as Si got home from school, which he was in Virginia, he takes a 30-day leave and comes to Louisiana. I always do.

Guess who has to do all the moving and everything? He's pointing out of him. Yes. I'm not getting in the middle of this. But in the meantime, Scott was in the exceptional family member program, which means he needed extra care medically. and there were places and the gambling addiction

and yeah that's right so can't keep the boy out of the clubs I had to get permission so they had to send the paperwork to Zybrookin to make sure

they had all of his medications well just so happens they did not so they sent back and said unable to comply so not only on yeah it went back supposedly to Washington. So therefore, it's a no-go.

Only it didn't, the paperwork didn't get to Washington. So we wind up at the airport in Frankfurt, Germany, and nobody there to meet us because nobody knew we were coming. And then when I called the unit, the stupid unit said,

you're not here. I said, oh, I beg your pardon. I'm here. I feel like I'm here. Yeah. I'm here with my wife and child and children. So, hey, send somebody to pick me up since y'all have screwed the pooch here.

So we didn't have a place to live. He didn't have a job. And there we were. And Scott didn't have his medication. In Germany. In Germany. So I finally figured out what really happened, why I actually got to go there all the time. What happened?

I was a secret agent for the Army. Oh, no, no. Upstairs. Oh, James Bond. I said I was James Bond in the military. Double-O Vietnam. That's right. Double-O Vietnam, boy.

Germany did have his medication, though. They just had to buy it from the Germans, which meant, you know, more money. Yeah. So. That's a... So you land. And nobody's... Nobody knows you're coming.

Nobody wants me. And no... How long were you there after you landed? Huh? Oh, I stayed there for another three years. Did you ever tell him you were there? No, no, hey, y'all, I kept telling them, hey, y'all, I kept asking my bosses, okay, what is going on here, folks? Y'all don't want me here, and yet where do I end up here?

What is the problem here? So, Christine, what ended up? We stayed there eight years. Yeah. And they finally got it worked out? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, finally, hey, when they kicked me out.

Technically, they loved you so much, they kept you. Oh, yeah. Like one of the dogs that just kept going on. All right. Hey, one year, okay, me and the boss had a problem. They told me, hey, go sit behind your desk, you ain't got a job. They figured I would screw up where they could get rid of me, bust me and get rid of me. Well, instead, hey, no, that was Vietnam.

He was holding up his little pinky. Because he told him he wasn't going to move a finger for him. Yeah, I told the company commander. Yeah, this finger upset. I said, you see that? He said, see what? I said, my little finger. He said, what about it?

I said, I want him wiggle that for you. I said, you might as well turn me loose and let me go home. Trouble. He wouldn't do it. Hey. How do you put up with him? Christine. Yeah.

How? He don't do you like that, does he? They finally got it right, though. Look, they finally got it right after 24 and a half years. He was trying to say. Because they finally said, okay, Robinson, hey, you got this many years. Hit the street. We're getting rid of you.

they did me a favor. And you were glad. They kicked out. Then I find out, okay. Uh-oh. Right. This has always been a sore spot with her. Yes.

Yeah, boy. Yeah. Tracer is in her senior year in high school. And hey, let me tell part of story. I had to move in my senior year to a new school. You did? Yeah. Yes, I moved my senior year and done another half a year at a brand new school.

which was the pits. I bet. Because I didn't know any, my party concluded with, I drank a gallon of beer at the house. All right, go back to Christine. A fifth a beer, excuse me. Fitha beer. Is that how they measure beer?

I didn't know they made the brown bags that big, Sigh. Well, hey, it had a bottle about that big around. It looked like the one is Mr. T. That's called 40 ounce. Well, whatever. But that was my. party for wait so tracer had to move her senior year

no tracer was in her senior year and we had already talked about the fact that we would not move our kids the last year of high school that's right that's just so I got with a friend of mine that I worked with she was they've done through me out of the army

and I'm ready to go home but I've got a daughter that's in high school. So I had to sign over. So what are we going to do? Mrs. Susan's trying to tell us. I know. I had to sign her over

to another adult. To y'all's friends that you... Five or attorney. That y'all left? Yeah. So we left her in Germany. And then I find out later on. Wait, this is in Germany? I thought this was like in Maryland. I called a flash plane

to the state, boys. We left her in Germany. And went to Alabama. I went to good old Alabama. Okay. And then I found out later on that Saikud has stayed in the apartment until she graduated. Only he didn't tell me. I found out later.

Well, I didn't know. You checked into it. I didn't know. You didn't try to find out either. No, I didn't. I was ready to get out of this joint. Christine, you need something to throw at him. We got pins.

There's a knife. You can throw that Black Panther out of them. It's pretty heavy. Well, now I know why she got rid of your bells. It all makes sense now. Yeah, but I had got so good on them. Oh, my goodness. That's a sore spot with me, my bell.

I think her sore spot has a little more clout than the bells. No, but it actually done my daughter really good because she graduated with all her classmates. Yeah. Okay. With honors. With honor. With college courses already done. Wow.

In Germany. And we never figured out where that came from. And then she got a full scholarship to Texas A&M. Maybe. Which meant that she got a stipend along with her college being paid for. She was going to go to Duke. And I was all for that because I used to be a Duke man. You used to be a Duke man?

Oh, yeah. How does that kind? Because they always won the championship in basketball. You fair way. fan. Oh, no. Hey. He just roots

for whoever's the best, Phil. But then they gave a better deal. Texas A&M gave him a better deal. I'm just going to say it. Zach Dasher, if you're listening,

you've already made a movie about Phil Robertson's life. I think there's a story somewhere sitting across from me that would, it would be more of a, maybe a romantic comedy. Yeah.

And with a little drama. Yeah. like Forrest Gump. It would be a good one. It would be good. But I do have a Bible verse to send us out of here. We see if you get that picture that I sent you. Did you send me another picture?

Yeah. Where'd it go? It's a picture of Sai and Tracea. I'm going to send us out of here with a Bible verse that probably Miss Christine had to live by being married to Sai. You ready? Proverbs 3, 5, and 6. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding and all

your ways submit to him and he will make your path straight. look that's a winding story it wasn't you know full of the terrible things that Phil and Kay went through but there was a lot of stuff I can't imagine hopping off a plane in Germany and nobody there to pick me up with a child and being like I'm here what am I supposed to do and they were say not be here is what you're supposed to do so y'all's life is an incredible testimony

as well I'm proud to know both of you and we'll see y'all next time right here in the duck car room Miss Christine you are amazing thank you for joining us Thank you.