Duck Call Room - Uncle Si Is Battling a Painful New Skin Condition

Episode Date: August 13, 2024

Uncle Si’s friends come to his rescue from the painful skin condition he’s been living with for the past few weeks. Phillip gets a report from his doctor about his own mysterious health situation and John-David’s worst job ever doesn’t even come close to Si’s. Martin explains how he met his best friend and “Duck Call Room” contributor, Clay McConnell. An incident with stinging insects reveals a behind-the-scenes coincidence from a famous “Duck Dynasty” episode, as well as the strange ingredient in Si’s homemade chewing gum.   - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I went to the doctor today because I've been waiting three months to get in to see this specialist. And I got a good shot at it. What did they take? Welcome back to the duck call room and welcome to Phillips Health Life with a three-month specialist. I feel good. Nobody that feels good waits three months to get to a specialist. Can we guess what the specialist is? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, let's guess what it is.

That's fun. It's a family show. You can't guess. I can't get it. A GI doctor. No. No, no, no, no, no. for your gout because you're a gout man now like me nope and a gout i'm going to say an endocrinologist no i don't even know what that is oh thanks i i had to ask what that was i just heard it the other day

and it was a long word so i wanted to sound smart when you get gray in your beard and in your hair you went to a barber negative ghostrider did you go to a urology yay oh yeah oh I had to visit one of them. Yeah. So, no one mine got to side of that cup. I googled a wiener doctor, and that's what came out,

urologes. I was like, I don't know how to make this family friendly. No, that's not what it is. No, everything's good. The doctor said,

hey, I'm healthy as a horse. Everything's fine. What were you worried about? And why did you wait three months? Well, it takes that long to get into a specialist. Yeah.

My doctor sent me to the specialist, and I took medications before I got there. But it was all good news. Did you get a vasectomy? Everything. Nope. I've got one. Me too.

Urologist. Urologist, bow. I'm glad it didn't take me three months. I made that phone call. They got me in pretty quick. Yeah, I just walked in. I said, do y'all do walk-ins? They're like, I guess so.

Yeah, why not? And it was quick for y'all. Yeah. Nope, not in this situation. No, but everything's good. And you know what? And I thank God for my health, and I'm glad everything's good.

I was at Sye's house last night. I was sweating it. I was like, sigh, I don't know if I'm going to make it, buddy. He was like, Yeah, you'll be fine. Yeah, it'd be right. Wait, you didn't, last night, you didn't know if you were going to make it?

Uh-uh. You don't know when you're waiting on this kind of news. Oh, but now you have the news. Yeah, now I'm good. I mean, I took test and x-rays and I've done everything leading up to a meeting. Okay, so now you got the all clear. Yeah, blood work. Yeah, I'm good.

So that's why I said it was a little bit scary. Yeah. No, you don't. Yes, I do. It's just. Oh, I know what it is. No. No, it's, you know, when our.

sons go to the bathroom, you know, they can pee over roofs, over fences and stuff like that. Once you're a certain age, you just pee on your shoes. It's just, you know, start, stop, trickle. No, I got a stream, but sounds like I'm frying chicken. Oh, really? Still got a very healthy prostate, huh? That's what I was going with. No.

Anyways. Can you shoot around corners now? I'm just trying to figure out where we are. That's how very, these are very personal questions. I know. I mean, because they got all them commercials that come on now, you know. No, no. That's what it was.

About big carrots. That's what you said. Yeah. See? Yeah. Look like him Jason Boring guns. No, that's not it. I have no idea what we're drunk over.

Peroni's disease, man. What? Peroni's disease. Peroni's a Italian. Yeah. Lightbair. No, that's a thank you. Martin, that's not it.

Oh, okay. No. It's all. He just Googled Peroni's disease. Yes. Lord, thank God I didn't hit images. No, this is more. Family-friendly's out, ladies and gentlemen.

This was more like just some prostate issues and, but everything's good now. Oh, well, good. Yeah, and I had a lot of people praying for me and, you know, it's just scary when you don't, when you don't know. And so I'm glad everything's going to be good. There you go. Good.

Looks like I'm going to make it. Hey, boy. Well, welcome back to the land of the living. Land of the living. And Johnny D, you're looking good. What are you doing, losing weight? No. No, seriously, you're losing weight.

I've lost 40 pounds. Okay. What are you shooting for? What's your... I want to see a one when I step on the scale. Oh, 205? No, 205 I might hit Saturday. Okay.

But I want to see a 199.9. And then I'm going to eat like four pizzas. And I'll never see it again. I want to see it one. One more time and then I'll be good. And then I'm going to hang out between 199 and like 2.10. You go eat four pizzas after that.

There's going to be other stuff you ain't going to see for a while too now. Yeah. My toes. Yeah, no. Hey, that's good. I do a lot of jump ropes. 199. So what have you been doing?

When's the last? No, forget that. I don't care about your diet. When's the last time you had a one in front of your weight? A, I do not eat. And B, I, uh, a jump rope. That's all you do. That's the solve.

Just don't eat. If you want to lose weight, you have to be hungry. Problem solved. Anyway, last time I saw $1.99. Don't know. Yeah. When I started dating Allison. I was got him 10 years ago.

No, more than that. I knew him 10 years ago. He wasn't at 1. Oh, he's at 15, 20 now. 20 years ago. I would have been 21 years old. Yeah, that's what it was. So 14 years ago?

Yeah. I ran a triathlon, right? True story at 21. Did you swim it too? Oh, that was actually my strength. And then a week later, Allison walked her way back to my life and I had never picked up or jogged or did anything since. You've been fat and happy since. I've been gaining weight ever since, you know.

But that was, I was probably 190 then. That's awesome. So we're going for 199. I don't know if it's possible. That's crazy. I've hit this new weird stage of none of my clothes look normal on me. I was like put trash bags on and I'm just, I look like a little kid wearing his dad's shirt.

Yeah, you had to go find a belt and like all that. Oh, yeah. But I don't want to get rid of them, you know, because who's to say if this is going to stick? Yeah, safety net. So now I have been listening to The Unashamed. And have y'all heard what Allen's doing? Not that.

No. No, I'm just saying visual. I'm just saying visually. No, that's what he's doing. So, Alan is sworn to lose 60 pounds. 60? 60. Hey, hey, come to just, he drives past my house all time.

I got this to say, good luck, buddy. That's a lot. 60 for 60? Because he's about to be 60. Yeah, that's what he said. That's exactly what he said. Yeah. He can do it.

Well, I don't know. That woman here has cooked good food, son. Well, that's the, see, but look, just don't eat breakfast or lunch, and then you can eat whatever you want. And I know Island Robinson, Alan Robertson likes good food. Okay, so he's got his work cut out for him. That's why I wished him good luck. Yeah, I can do it.

Well, no, no, I ain't saying he can't do it. And he's got stone right there in the compound to just scow at him and call him pathetic whenever he eats something. I think that's the reason he put on the 80. Yeah. He said he's going to burn all the vests. and not look back. He's burning the vest.

That's a lie. I don't know. I don't believe that. I don't believe that. I don't believe that. That's what he said. They look so good in them. I don't believe that.

Them vest are like that little duck Wayland toch around with. It's like security. Comfort. Yeah, that's too close to the heart. Carter's got that too. It's called Rhinoleicious. It's a rhino that he named Rhinoleicious and it goes everywhere.

Yeah, they all have one. Al's got vest. I used to have hooties. Yeah. Every, you know. I'm so lucky I don't have the end of that problem. No, you don't. I really am.

But by gaining weight stuff. Your weight stays the same. It's so unfair. Okay. The funniest part is how people gain weight. Well, it's my active lifestyle that does it. You know, I've actually, I did, I get that look. That hurts my feelings.

Hey, I'm active. Boy, I claim me out of bed all the time. Never stop moving that jaw. Hey, that's a rough life. Yeah, and you talk a lot. Apparently dreaming burns a lot of calories. And talking. I did read a thing that was like,

if you don't get enough sleep, you can't lose weight. So maybe you that maybe you are the story. Well, no, no, because I'm telling you. God wakes me up all hours of the morning and night. That's not God. That's your blighter. No, no, no.

McNeillan knows a specialist. I took that test today too. No, no. When you hear something like, pst, pst, tigh, I got some tea. You didn't know God talked to me. And he said, eat that ice cream.

Black walnut, baby. Go get another. No, I'm off to Black Walda. Now he's, now his ice cream's got to have a stick in it. Hey, I'm for it, man. Hey, look. So let me, let me tell you. You had a dream sickle?

My granddaddy loved dream sickle. A dream sickle. That's a horned sherbet thing. Which are vanilla in the other. That's too rough on my teeth. It's like a popsicle. Can't eat popsicle. They're too rough on my teeth.

They are. I'm serious. Martin, leave it. I'll take it, Martin. Take it, Martin. Yeah. No, we're leaving. So I knew so I was at home alone.

Okay? And so I went over. A woman left me. I went over. Me and my wife went over and we met Beth from the duck car room. Our Canadian food. Yes, from Canada.

This story is the definition of Canada nice. Well, no, no, because see, y'all asked me what happened to my face. Beth knew, okay, because she has a sleep thing. And where's a man? That's what it was. And she stayed quiet when she knows something. No, no.

She don't ever volunteer. She ain't here today either. Yeah, Beth is a little talking to a little lady. Yeah. And she's not a hugger, so I give her a hugger every time I see it. Hunter, what's that look for? She's kind of shy. Sorry, Hunter works directly under her.

So we bring a pizza to side. We bring him a pizza just the way he likes it, the weird way he likes it. Whoa. And no. What's the weird way? Pepperoni halapennepanias. And double brick. Double brick.

Anyway, that's what I call it good pizza. So we bring him a pizza. He's like, no, he's watching poker. And I was like, okay, so I pause that poker. Hold on. Hold on. Can't pause it just yet? Come on.

So I finally get him off of it. And I'm like, okay, here's some special cream for your face. This is what's been happening. When you wear your mask, when you sleep at night with a CPAP, it's causing you to break out. So Beth came over. We cleaned everything. Well, no, no, because what I tell you, I put that cream on it.

Oh, he brought me. Okay. And then I actually had burned. So I, it dead skin. So I peeled the dead skin off. That's why it looks better. Yeah. Okay.

It's got air now. And feels better. Well, no, no. Yeah, it ain't tight. Yeah. Okay. Because it was. Did we know what it happened?

Yeah. The mask caused him to break out. Tom Cruise over here had that thing. Sinched down. That's why you got to, I got a machine. Did you happen to give her the lid to your cup too? what do you mean he's saying your cup and he's cleaning it's growing something's that

there's only a few people in the world that can stain stainless steel hey that's just good tea stain the man has stained hey I watched it every once in a while deal I looked at that lid on that cup the other day and it is this tan oh no hey I mean the tannins in the tea have tanned that

Oh, no. That lid on that cup. He's got a bottle of turpentine that he cleans it with on occasion. Hey, oh, I'll clean it. Oh, I'm not worried about the inside. It's just funny. Like, because I'm like, man, he's got that thing filled all the way to the brim. And I'm like, oh, no, he don't.

That's just the color of the lid now. Yeah, that's the color of the stain. Hey, Big Dave's coffee, Eddie. Same way. Is it really? They don't clean the lids. You reach. Yeah, I do.

I clean it. You reach an age in life you could stop cleaning the lids. No, no, because my wife, hey, my wife is going to. All lids. She's got a sponge combo. It's a sponge on one side and then a rough kind of a... Like a brilipad. Yeah, brittal pad on the other side.

It's yellow on one side, green on the other. Yeah. So, hey, look, I soap it up real good and then, hey, hot, hot, hot water. Okay. And I'll clean it up. And take care of the stain. And I do that at least once a week. Okay.

That's wild. So a lot of people said, that's crazy. And I said, no. You ain't dirty, you big dummy? It's just stained. You use that cup every day immensely, and your defense there was, and I clean it like what?

At least once a week. He don't clean his body much more often. Oh, I take a shower. I said it whether I do it or not. It's so hot outside. I took three showers. Take the lid off and let me have a look at it. I got a question for you.

It's your house. Yeah. You're Tupperware stained like red from like spaghetti. Eddie sauce. Hey, no, no. I used that Tupperware glass I used to carry around all the time. Oh, I know. My wife had to soak that, okay?

It was so stained. Okay, you couldn't clean it with just a pillow pad. She had to soak that in, what is that junk? Neapum. No. What is it? Bleach. Huh?

Bleach. Bleach. Yeah. He had to pour like a, oh, I'm talking about like a shot glass full of bleach in it, okay. and send it overnight. Okay. Where it could, where the bleach could eat it off.

Uranium. Yeah, no, no. And then it drank out of tonium. No, no. Hey, no. No, no. Because after she bleached it, she washed it with soap record.

That was straight gasoline. Then she lit a match through it in it. Seriously, what is it? That won't work in a belt it. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means? That means more outside cooking.

and y'all know we love to eat beef around here and that's what because of our friends over at try tell's beef makes such a good product baby ain't it good it's so good it's our friend sall robertson would say buy on the grill look before we got tritels getting ready for a cookout man somebody had to run the grocery store do all the things grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day and you never really know where that beef come to them but with tritels beef we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Triedales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch, so they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped

straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I'll tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out TryTales beef. I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a, uh, she doesn't eat meat. She ain't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef. Don't. Support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. What other things you've got to understand? Huh? Well, I don't know. Because you're a creature. I don't want to go down to him.

No, he got all new Tommy John. No, no. Okay. No, no. You'll like this. I went to the store and bought me a bottle about this towel of black shoe polish. Okay. Okay.

I've got it in my right pocket in my blue jeans. Right now? No. Okay. When this happened. I come home and me and Phil getting an argument about it and he slammed the door. I was trying to get in the door and he slammed it. And guess what happened?

it busted shoe polish in the pocket. That black bottle of shoe polish. And when it busted that glass, well, it jabbed me and, hey, it looked like it hit an artery, but it didn't. You don't look,

as though, asco colors is red and black, the rebels. Okay. I'm bleeding like a stunt pig, and black and red or mixed running down my leg. This ain't when you jumped over the fence

and the bees got you. No. No, that's another time. Okay. 27 times on my rear end. My butt was bigger than any woman. It's everyone. Okay.

My wife, my wife, my mom. Easy. No, no. My mom was pulling bee stings out of my rear end and just cackling like a hinder that just laid an egg. And I said, it ain't that funny. And she said, oh, yes, it is. This is the biggest your rear end is ever going to be.

I couldn't even get in my blue jeans. Why did you have shoe polish? Huh? We never found that out. Yeah, why did you have shoe polish? Well, I hate to put on my black shoes. Dye, have you ever polished a shoe? Nobody's had them polished.

Doesn't look like it. It doesn't look like it. First off, wrong. Have you ever sat down in the airport to having people clean shiny shoes? I don't wear the right shoes. Now, I do have. I clean, not these are my work shoes. I got some tennis shoe cleaning devices at my home.

Yeah. Like a brush and the pink, the pink, what's it called? Shoes B. Yeah, you got fancy shoes. I was just wondering. Pink miracle. That's what I used. You've sat at the airport and had your shoes, Paula?

Oh, yeah. Oh, I've done that. Yeah, me and Sae have done it when we're waiting. Well, I would just do it for a place to sit. No, he wanted his boots shined up. Yeah. Oh. Yeah.

Yeah. Your alligator ones or whatever they are? Yeah, cowboy boots. Yeah, plus I like what somebody's just good. that's really good a shoeshine boy. That's it. Put your back into it.

Well, no, no. And most of them can, they'll sing to you while they're doing it. What? Okay. And I,

yeah, there ain't nothing better a shoe shine that can sing. Polishing. Because in between the singing the song, all you hear that

pique p p pique piqu. He's popping that rag on that shoe in time of what he's singing. They're talented boys. I'm telling you. I don't wear the type of shoes. get polished. I think I have maybe a pair of shoes that you would get polished.

They're brown. I've got, I think I own a few pairs, but I just. There's some military in me. Polishing the shoe. Polishing in the boot was. Yeah.

You had to do that. Oh, yeah. Yeah. You have to do that every time you wore dresses, dress, and all that. Oh, yeah. Oh,

you saw that. You had to shine your shoes every time. Oh, yeah. Oh, did you have to shine them when you got in trouble? Huh? Did you ever get in trouble? I have to shine them up? No.

Oh. Do you ever have to shine them? somebody else's? No. You ever have to clean the little the train? Oh yeah, with a toothbrush. Yours?

Uh? No. Yeah. If you do it wasn't yours, you throw it away and get you a new one. That's wisdom. Yeah. That's just a wild thing.

I mean, I don't, I mean, I would guess a shoe shiner's pretty much out of business these things. No. Not in the airport. But not in the airport,

but that's just something to kill. I'm just talking about just. The airport is the weirdest place in the whole wide world. That's why I like to travel and sit and watch because it ain't no telling what you're going to see. This day and ain't you are right.

So now, you know, he don't walk through the airport. I push him through. That's right. And then he's looking and talking and hollering at people, you know? The worst thing that ever happened to me in a while he's doing this, he's pushing me and it pushed me up to the elevator, okay, to go down.

Look, and I've touched this thing and hey, it stood me up in that wheelchair. A little shock. It's like a short. That's it. Hey, it literally stood me up and he yanked me back and all the thing he saved me or the electric cube. He said, did it shocky?

I said, what did you think? Didn't you see me come up, you know, to a tension? Yeah, it shocked me. Come up to the attention. So now when I, when he pushed me up to say, hey, when he pushed me up to the other day, touch the elevator, I said, Nope. No, that's your job.

That's DFW. That's where he got popped. Oh, is Dallas is where he got you. Oh, it popped me good. They sure did. So now I don't push elevator.

Now he's been conditioned not to touch the buttons. He's like, nope. Nope, Philip. That thing fired me up. I'm talking about it. I just wait on somebody else to show up.

Hey, we're just standing there and I said, you're going to push the button? I said, nope. You push it. You push it. You learn pretty quick, huh?

Oh, yeah. Burn me a one. Don't, yeah. Your shame, shame on your, burn me twice, shame on me. Yeah. How many times you pee on an electric fence growing up? No. None?

George Bush over here. Boom, keep, boom, me. And I'm a little leery of fences, too, especially if they got to wooden post. Oh. Once you get shocked, you remember. Just fences in general? Yeah. Oh, no, the wood post, I don't fool with them.

Because that's what happened that day. That's one in bees, got. Bill went through, okay, and he shook them up and made them mad. Well, when I went through, hey, I heard a rip and didn't know it. I had tore my blue jeans. Polvaled over the top. You know, and hey, look, I fell down and I had read somewhere that if some chasing you behind you like bees, if you fall down,

they'll just fly over you. That's a ball face lie, especially if you got white underwear being the target. How long were they white? Huh? Oh, hey. About like that lie we believed. When they got after you. About like that lie, we believed you told us that they won't sting yet at night.

Oh, yeah. Well, I don't know. There's another thing I tried. That's wrong. That was a ball face lie too. But somebody told you that. Oh, yeah. They said they don't stay at night.

Well, that's a ball face night. That's wrong. Then another time in the hay, I'm putting hay in a barn. And they said, well, if you hold your breath, it closes the pores on your skin. So you won't get no hay fever or no? Yeah. Well, no. And that can't.

They can't sting you because all your holes are closed. Yeah. Well, I did that and they don't pop the piss out of it. Oh, yeah. Okay. So, hey, look, you know, you can't trust the human race. They'll lie that you're a heartbeat. Yeah, my grandpa hit me.

Yeah, oh, no. He hit me with that when we were robbing Walsnest for fish bait. Yeah. You know, you're a lot of larva. Oh, yeah. And it was a Sunday. He said, oh, you don't need that spray. They don't sting on Sundays.

Yeah. Of course, I'm a kid. I'm like, I guess they take a day off. Yeah, yeah, they like, hey, don't, you don't work on. And you got stuck? Did I get stuck? Did he get stung? Yeah.

And did Papal laugh? Yeah. Buddy. Yeah. They ate me up. I got my fishing bait. Hey, but he did get his fishing. I went fishing after that.

I mean, it took a little bit of that blue cold gate toothpaste on my arms and my hands where I got ate up. Oh, another thing good for that is to a person that. A person that choose tobacco? I'm poor, man. It's Sunday, too. Everything is closed. Yeah.

That's what you're buying. Hey, tobacco juice is a bacon. Yeah. Is that true? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

All your old time is you come in a wall right there's, you know, right for you did. Side, will a white face be sting you? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I walked too. I used to walk sideways

in high school. Because we used to take a little thin one-by and make a paddle out of it and we'd go out there and all the bumblebees quack them with that paddle. Well, hey, I whacked one and knock him down on the ground. Well, guess what? He was a fighter.

He jumped up and said, pangow on my nose. Look. You know, look, guess what? Phil's neck to me and this bee is just Bill took me, grabbed me by the chest. bang out he slapped me out i mean knocked me on the ground but he did get the beef hey the bee was stuck jerry jerry jerry jrandi you know him in the big nose he didn't have nothing on me what that bee stung me big nose okay i had to walk sideways cause hey this thing was like this big around

i couldn't even see i had to walk sideways there he is why is it why is it well look at that snout that boy has a snout duck call room Jimmy Durante has probably caught more strays from Sigh. Poor guy. My man was born in 1800s. Hold on, my nose is three times bigger than that. Oh, Gonzo. But why is it when somebody else gets stung?

It's hilarious. I don't think it's funny. But when it happens to you, there is nothing that makes me more irrationally angry than getting stung with some. Well, no, no, no. And then all you got all your so-called good friends are on the floor died. That's right.

I had a friend of mine that was shooting them, shooting yellow jackets. Him and another guy was shooting them. Shooting what? Shooting yellow jackets inside of a cliff where the river is. What kind of gun? Like a 12 gauge, just shooting into them, you know. And I said, y'all better leave them yellow jackets alone. And they came out, son, they started to attack, and they got popped everywhere.

And one of them got hit right here up in the nose. You'd have to be a pretty good shot to hit a yellow jacket. They're just shooting into the side. Yeah, I think they just saw where they were going. Right. Into the ground. They earned that. Oh, no.

Yeah, they deserved that. That's a sting inside the nose. Hornets have got a big ball nest. Oh, yeah. Well, hey, don't ever look over and say, oh, there's a hornet nest on that tree. Watch this with a 22 rifle. Hey, y'all. And I mean, hey, look here.

It was pow! And now! Because look, the Hornet followed that rifle trajectory. Because, hey, he shot, and I mean, that Hornet popped him right here. He had his eye on the scope. Is that right? Well, I mean, I've always heard it. I've never.

No, no. I've only seen like. Hey, I hope you doubt me. Go try it. No, I don't. Because, hey, I'm telling you, that's what about you? I've only seen like three Hornets nest. in my life, period, like that he's

talking about the, I don't remember what they're called. Oh, it's a beautiful thing. It's cool. Yeah. I always wanted to get it down and like, like, shellack it and have, but I was always too chicken to do the process of getting it down. I was just a thing because, hey, look, here's what it did.

A guy was, he was in the nature, okay? So he finds one of them things that, hey, this thing is like this big around. You used beautiful thing. Okay. He takes it, okay, because in the wintertime they go into the ground.

So is it empty? Huh? Is it empty? Yeah, it's empty. It's empty in the wintertime. Because I think they go, or maybe they stay there. I don't remember what, but anyway, he takes this thing in his house and all he deal was paying over it. Okay, well, hey, they're inside.

Well, when it's time for them to come out, they're in the house and guess what? He comes home and, hey, him has, his wife, his kids, all of them got stung like 15, 20 times a piece. Because the whole house was full. So you got to have that thing treated by a taxidermist. Yeah, I didn't know that.

Yeah, yo. But it's beautiful. It would be a good prop for like sitting here behind. Oh, no, no, no. Oh, yeah. We need one. Oh, these things are beautiful. Ain't nobody taxidermy and hornets nest, are they?

I think they should lack them and do all the. They have to put a gas in there to kill them. the bees. Yeah. So they've got to put this thing in a container. Johnny, do you know how Sigh knows things. When you look it up, that's what you're going to find. Hey, but hey, they're expensive.

Yeah, they're expensive. Oh, no, no, no, no. I mean, you're basically treating paper without ruining it. Back when there wasn't any of this fine guns we got today, it was all powder, putting powder and all of it, they used that as the wadding. Yeah, I see that. They hornish nests. it's, you know, all it is is paper.

Yeah, they just make paper. I mean. Oh, it's wild. But them things are beautiful. Where do we do that famine and then it? It's a rotten tree that's got a... Oh, the bees. The bees and the honey.

At that Blackman Lake Lodge thing, they go up there and they have that sound in that thing. This thing is beautiful. For Duck Dynasty. It's an old tree, okay? The tree's dead. And hey, look up in a fork, okay, it's just... Just golden honey, golden honey leaking out of the tree. Is that the one that was on Duck Dynasty?

No, no, that was different. That was one down at fields where we went and robbed the honeycomb at night. But we went up there filming just messing around. And then we got next to that tree. And I was like, and we heard. Yeah, you could hear, whoa. Like a ghost. Yeah, everybody said, wait a minute, what's that noise?

And then you look up and you see the honey, but then you look about halfway between you and the honey, and there's just a hole. and you can't put another bee on that hole. And I'm like, we got to get away from this tree. Are we about to all get me up? Hey, this thing was rotten. If we'll have bumped it, it'll fail. And we got tore up.

I'm serious. The stuff you only see in nature, though. I'm telling you. A lot of people I never see stuff like it. Yeah, they got honey at the grocery store if you want it that bad. Just head over. Or go to Jeff and Jessica's. There you go.

Jebidenska got bees. Do they still have bees? The boxes are back there. It's summertime. Me and my dad are sitting on the front porch. I feel like this is going to be rude. Oh, no, no, no. And it's swarm time, okay?

Because dad looks across the field, and all you see is just a big black cloud, and it's coming toward us. Uh-uh. No, I've seen that movie. Get out of there, man. This ain't no movie. It's just real life.

I've seen the movie. Get out. This big, flat cloud is coming toward us. My next door neighbor had that purple vine and flowers. Oh, yeah, West area. Yeah. She had a whole thing, a whole canopy up it on her backyard, on her house. Oh, no.

Well, hey, them bees come before me and they go over and light on one of them. It was a vine about this big around. Mm-hmm. They just bawled up about the size of, I'd say, oh, it was a water bees just big around on that vine. A bunch of them. Yeah, a bunch of them. Okay, just on top of each other.

you know daddy goes right quick get the hammer we got a little old shed on the back that's got a pine knot on it he hit that pine knot knocks a hole out you know makes a hole in it put the two chairs sets two chairs down and he said come with me boy you know I said

where we're going he said we fix to get us a beehile you know and I'm looking at him like going to get what he said that we walk over there here's this big ball of bees just crawling on each other he said grab hold here while I cut cut the limb the vine and I said do what was he did he blow smoke on them no no we just

walked up there he said grab it right here he's about that far from the bees he cut that end I'm holding it he said don't shake it I said oh I ain't he cut the other end off and look we walk around there okay set that thing down on them two chairs and he's sits down and sits there, sits there for like 30 minutes. Looking at these bees crawling on each other. Then I said, oh, there she is. Stumped that queen bee in that hole.

They get up, go around. Black cloud. In the hole. Okay. Did you get stung? Nope. Nope. And look, from then on, he took a regular skill saw, cut a square out,

of that thing and nailed it back up. Okay. And every year when we get ready, all we had to do is pull two nails, lift that out, lay it down gently, and get all the honey wanted, put it number three wash tub, put it back up, nail it back up.

Wow. That's pretty cool. And a, hey, number three washtub, slam full of honey comb and honey. Gee, to comb. Oh, yeah. There's this place called Super One. they got these little plastic bears.

It's full of all the same stuff. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, that's wild. I didn't even know you could eat the comb. Oh, yeah. Yeah, you just say. There's a whole cereal.

We used to use it. Hey, that was our bubble gum. Okay. You're a bubble gun? I'm serious. We'd open a jar of honey with a big piece of cone in it. Take a knife, cut you off just like a tobacco, put it in your mouth, chew it.

But they do have what we got, sweet gum tree. I wouldn't have made it back then. Sweet gum tree, hey, you cut it, take a bolt to knife and just cut it. The trunk. Well, come back two weeks later and it'll be just solid salf. You just break you off. It's good gum. Nothing like a good old piece of bar chewing gum.

It's good gum, though. I was there, sweet. Wait till I tell you about big red or juicy fruit. Have you ever seen Big League to you? About to blow your mind, Bubba. Yeah. Double bubble anybody. Hey, that was my childhood.

We had a lot of good stuff going on. That is unbelievable. Oh, no. That's just, your nature, you know, has some wonderful things that you can get into. You know what else does? What? Our inbox. Oh, okay.

What? Look at it. See what happened. It's got some wonderful things we can get into. Johnny didn't get in there. Hello. Panic. with peanut butter.

What? I wasn't even going to talk about this one. Why? Aaron from New Hampshire eats weird food. Okay. He says everybody thinks he's some kind of freak. Aaron, if everybody thinks that, it might be true. That's not.

Because whenever he gets pancakes or waffles, peanut butter, peanut butter, then syrup. I mean, I do put peanut butter on waffles. Do you? Uh-huh. I can see that. That's not that off. I'm a game.

It's not too bad. My father came up, put peanut butter on a BLT. Yeah. Peanut butter on a waffle and then put syrup. I don't do, if I'm using peanut butter, I forego the butter. Yeah. Butter goes on. Chicken wobble squeeze butter.

But you got to have like, I tried it on pancakes, but pancakes just fall apart. You know, they don't have the tensile strength. That's right. Waffles are so much better. Waffles better. Yeah, and they got the little crevasses. That's right. That's right.

Yeah. I love a waffle. I would eat 14 waffles right now. I'm starving. No, you got to get to that one-99. Okay. Yeah, waffles aren't. Dad, I wouldn't call that.

I mean, the added butter is a little weird, but I don't think that's overly weird. Peanut butter is just not my jam, though, unless it's surrounded by chocolate. Unless it's called Reese's. We apparently have done something halfway foolish. Uh-oh. That's a... David from Huntsville, Alabama, emails in, and so does another David. Two Davids.

Nobody knows... Apparently, we... We've now had our good friend Clay McConnell on the show twice. And we're just like, hey, Clay's here. And we just run with it. Yeah. Nobody has a clue who Clay is except for a guy with weird hair. Hey, okay, let me tell you something.

How do we introduce Clay? Clay was on Duck Family Treasure with us also. And my mom said, when we were catching an alligator on Duck Family Treasure, y'all need to watch it. She said, who is Martin's friend? My mom's 70. You know, I don't know. He is like, he is so handsome.

And look at his hair. I was like, I'm going to have to tell Clay she said. He does kind of have like a Fabio thing. He's got a look about him. Some call it Fabio. Some call it like Gico. Well, it looks like he's one to the women's and had a perm. That too.

And let's not forget the natural highlights that I call us frosted tips. Yeah, he's a look. Yeah, he's interesting. But Clay is Martin's friend. He is my friend. So me and Clay met years ago. Me and Willie went to a concert at Rabs. Steak House.

They have a little concert area. Yeah. And Clay was there. I actually met Clay by the back fence. Like I was back there minding my own business. I mean, I was like, because the crowd was just too much. This sounds like a real good place for Clay. Yeah.

And Martin to meet. Yeah. It makes a lot of things. Yeah. I just like, I get away from this. Like. And then this guy comes walking up looking like that. And I'm like, oh boy, what we got here?

Yeah. And so we just start talking and I'm like, oh, this guy's actually pretty cool, whatever. And he's one typical, all the things, and biting me duck hunting. And I'm like, yeah, whatever. And then, but he told me where it was. And I was like, I'll go there.

Well, I didn't know anything about it. I just, I'd always hunted next door to him. And I always wondered what was there. Like, I was. Yeah. Because you'd hear the shooting. and I was like, man, I just, I wanted to trespass, but I was like, you know, coming to Christ. So, like, those days were behind me.

Like, I wasn't, I wasn't just going to walk up there and just go kill somebody's ducks or shoot or, you know, any of that stuff. So then what he told me, I was like, man, that'd be actually pretty cool to actually get to see that place finally. And so I was like, yeah, you know, and we went hunting together a couple of times. And then he started asking me what I would do different to their place. And like so with them we've, I mean, I've been at Penn Oak now for, I don't know, 15 years or so, helping them manage their land and all their stuff. Yeah, we just became friends at night. And I mean, we hunt together a lot.

The first episode of Duck Dynasty was actually filmed at Clay's Place, you know, tearing down a fourth wall for people where the snake falls in the boat with Willie. But he's got a good plot of land. Yeah, it's a very interesting plot of land that they had there. I don't, the only person that calls me and I, say yes to go duck hunting if they either are a McConnell or know a McConnell very well well we're into like the same we're into the same thing we like getting ducks close like and that's what they like doing and so yeah i mean yeah we just we hit it off and we've been we've been friends ever since

and the more people know about clay and so but he's such a good friend that he comes in here just feels normal and so i guess we start without well we've always yeah i mean he's been around all of us to some level. If you look in like some of those weird collections of groups of people on Duck 9C2, you'll find Clay. You'll find that hair. Like if you just start looking at the extras in there, you just look around and you'll find Clay. He's part of the team. And you know, I worked in Rustin forever and still do. And so Clay is from there. And I see him a lot. But when he got close to you, he kind of got close with all of us. Yeah. So he's just a great guy. Now he meets with everybody up at the church.

and like all the things. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he's good people, man. And he's an airplane pilot. He is that. He's a pilot. He's flown me all over the country.

I'm a pilot. Yeah, so, but just a, he's got a relationship with all of us to some extent, which is why he fits kind of natural in here. Yeah. Yeah, but good people, good, great family. Good, his mom and dad are, are gems of the earth.

So, like, yeah, all, all things good. Now we know Clay. Now we know who Clay, where Clay comes from. Yeah, that's how he got here. That's how he ended up. All right. Do you want to hear about a Chubacabra or the worst job you've ever had? The worst job you ever had, please.

Boy, you're ready for that. I think both of those kind of go hand in hand, right? Henry, Henry from Florida drives a lot in Southwest Florida. Okay, Hank. Tampa? Hey, Henry. Yeah, what's Southwest Florida? That's actually kind of weird.

Is that, like, Mobile? deal? No, that'd be Northwest. Or is that Tampa. Yeah, I guess that is Northwest. But it's actually

Southwest for that part of it, hard to say. Yeah. So he just drives a lot around there and he hates it, I guess. What's the worst job

you've ever had or the worst day at work you've ever had? Ooh. Wow. I know you got some bad jobs. Oh, I've had a job. You've never.

to go first. What's the worst one? Yeah. The worst one I've ever had. Yeah. Was actually doing roofing, tar roofing. Oh, on major, a major, uh, warehouse. Hmm. That says, that I was, I was the tar man. Oh, like the boys on Shawshend. Oh, no, no, no. And it's, it's dangerous. Yeah. As a fact, that one boy got, got pushed off the roof. Yeah, no, no, I watched the kid. He had a bucket full of hot tar and he just, splashed it and a bunch of it got on him.

Oh. And it was just, they peeled off, you know, they peeled off tar and leg skin. Mm. Just, you know, it's, yeah, very dangerous job and what, that was the worst one I ever like. And I mean, I was going to be a fun question. I stayed scared the whole time I worked there. He thought it was going to be like shuffling dog crap, didn't you? Just melting our skin.

I long for the day. Falling in love. Oh, no, no, no, that was rough. That doesn't sound fun. Yeah, my worst job's not that bad. Yeah, I can't even compete. I mean, I don't even know what my worst job would have been. I mean, my jobs were pretty pedestrian.

It was nice in the wintertime because, you know, the heat. But it's just too dangerous. The burning flesh smell and I ruined it. The worst job I ever had was a waiter because people are mean. Come on. That's just awful. And I don't really like humans. I come across as like an extrovert, but I've got a lot of Martin in me.

Like, if I'm going to be part of a crowd, I'm going to be the fun part of the crowd. But I just prefer no crowd. Yeah. And so. I am my own crowd. Yeah. In fact, I think I'm really funny. So if I just hang up with myself, I have a pretty good time.

Yeah. I will laugh at myself. And people at restaurants are just mean. No, worst job I ever had. I remember it. Four hours is how long I've been. made it. I heard like if you work for lawyers, they'll just send you to get coffee or like send you across town to deliver papers and they'll pay you like 20 bucks an hour. And I was like,

I'm in on this, went and applied at a bunch of different law offices, got one, showed up. They were so mean, a bunch of mean lawyers. And I was there for like four hours. And then they told me what they were going to pay me. And it was I was like, well, I thought this was cool. And everybody was so mean. And so then at the end of the day, I looked at that lady and I was like, hey, I'm good. She was like, what do you mean? I'm not coming back. And she was like, really?

She said, no, you can keep that $20. I'm solid. I'll ask my mom if I need $20. Do you know, y'all are so mean, I don't even want you $20. Yeah, I was like, keep it. Do you know the difference between a dead lawyer in the middle of the road and a dead skunk in the middle of the road? The skunk has skid marks in front of it.

Thank Godwin. All right. All right. Yeah. Yeah, okay. Yeah, they tried to stop. Where they tried to stop. Oh.

Yeah, they floored it to hit the lawyer. I was thinking that the skunk crapped itself right before it got here. And the lawyer did. Different skid mark. I did deliver paint for a season, and I hated that in between school. Everybody's got like. Yeah, I mean, I was rough. I have one, like, growing up, my mom basically ran the credit union centric now.

I didn't get paid, but I had to sit in one spot after school and shred their papers. Oh, no. Like, and that's all I did. That prepared you for building duck calls, though. Yeah, but like duck calls, you got to talk to people. Like shredding paper, I was in a little room with a shredder, just pulling paper clips off, putting them over there, pulling staples out, and just that bag would get full, take it out and do. That sounds terrible.

Yeah, I never received any payment, but I did. get to live for free so I looked at it is you know I didn't have to buy groceries or nothing like yeah the benefits yeah how old were you great benefits uh well I couldn't drive so probably like six probably like sixth grade to about sophomore because I had the late birthday so I couldn't drive to a junior year like yeah mom didn't like take me home from school and I went to I went to Centric every day I used to drive the forklift in here yeah when this was Howard Publishing that's why we had to fix all that That's what I did in Vietnam.

Forklil? A rough terrain for the giant tires. But yours actually had a good engine, not these propane things like we were running around on there now. Yeah, it has had a problem. Yeah, you had diesel. Forklinson. Yeah, it had power too. Yeah, these propane things are sissies.

Yeah. And the way I got to driving, they just, the guy that was driving it, he served his year and left. And nobody was thinking. And they said, you know, we. We got a convoy coming in and said, hey, can anybody drive as a rough train for a hill? Well, I used to ride along with that guy, watch him work it, y'all. I said, well, I don't know how to crank it. I said, if y'all crank it, I can drive it.

I've heard that before. No, no, I'm curious. He said that. He said, my 8-7 is charged him. He said, oh, I can't. Come here. Come here. Get up here.

We got up around it. You know, and he said, all you got to do is push this button right here, and it'll crank. I said, hey, get off. Get out of the way. there you go interesting there is a chubacabra in Georgia Corbyn has found it he finds it's nine foot long has a neck

that's about 30 inches long and a head real small like a coyote they have seven witnesses and no pictures Corbyn you need a lawyer or you need pictures you got to have proof son or an intervention you got to have proof that too but look you're always going to have a job

you may not love and sometimes you got to do what you have to do so you can do what you want to do later That's right. And Colossians 3, 23 and 24 says whatever you do, work at it with all your heart as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. So even when lawyers are mean, quit that job and find a different.

But while you're there, work hard. Amen. All right. We'll see y'all next time right here in Duckcar Room. I want a list of things you've driven before.