Duck Call Room - Uncle Si is Moving OUT!

Episode Date: January 22, 2026

Uncle Si reveals why he’s suddenly being forced to move out of his home. Phillip recalls when a close friend exposed a religious “miracle” fraud that fooled an entire crowd, and Si recalls the moment during his military days that made him believe there’s more to reality than what we can see.. Martin laments losing his hair way earlier than most, and John-David finally solves a mystery that’s been bugging him for weeks. Plus, a killer fly is on the loose in the studio! Duck Call Room episode #520 is sponsored by: https://drinkag1.com/duck — Get 3 FREE AG1 travel packs, 3 FREE AGZ travel packs, plus FREE D3+K2 and an AG1 Welcome Kit with your first subscription order when you use our link! https://www.mypillow.com/duck — Get the best deals on all MyPillow's products, including the classic MyPillow for just $17.98, with code DUCK at checkout! - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I'm ready when you are, Martin. I'm not ready. I don't know if I'm ready or not. I get his yawn out. Ready or not. Here I come. You came. Welcome back to the duck call room, ladies and gentlemen.

It's the duck call room. I would feel remiss if I didn't start by saying, congratulations to the Indiana Hoosiers and the whole state of Indiana. Yeah. For becoming national champions. That was cool. It was a good game. Congratulations.

We got somebody over there. It's a little sour. but that's fine. We're not a sports podcast, but we do have to give credit. That was cool, wasn't in my thought. But who,

hold on, when I walked in today, there were camouflage Indiana University hats sitting here for all of us. Uh-huh, that's a big daddy. That's Russ,

who sent us the St. Elmo's fire, cocktail sauce. I'm the one that said they would take it all away, boys. Here, you can have my hat.

I have a gang of Miami ones. He said, hey, he's with the Miami Bunch. I will say most of our listeners, I'm guessing there are more Indiana fans than there are Miami fans. Yeah, I'm going to say that our footprint in the great state of Indiana is highly. Larger? Yeah, but I was looking for a better word, but just bigger.

Wider. We got more Indiana fans listening to Miami fans is what you're getting at. Most likely. Still not wearing this hat. Yeah. But thank you, Russ. I'm going to put it on one of our deer. Thank you for the Indiana.

a hat. Sometimes we forget to thank people for the gifts. Speaking of, we discovered the situation from the other day. Situation? I got a Christmas gift. Oh, who's that from? And it was just sitting here.

Well, what Christmas gift is a JD? It's a pizza cutter. A pizza cutter. Oh, wow. That's right. In the shape of a Ninja Turtle weapon, which is probably two of the three coolest things I've ever seen in my life. Allison, you're number one. still.

But I didn't know. Can I ask the third? No, that's number one. I didn't know who got it for me. But Hunter did some investigation. We found out. It was Alex. Mancusa?

Yeah. Oh. We grew up together. She just dropped me a Christmas gift off two weeks after Christmas said, Wow. Here you go. But didn't like try to claim that it was her. So thank you.

Who did it? Alex. Your niece? That's a re-gift. Well, that one's very now, Sharkey. That's re-gifted. I can tell you. It's not.

She saw it. That was intentional. Now, anybody that sees me. You don't end up with that one unless it's intentional. Ninja turtles and pizza screams John David Owens. Yeah. Ninja turtles. You know what that was.

There's just gifts all around. That was the plea for an invite to pizza night. It's not, hey, let's have a pizza night. She must have driven by and saw me cooking pizza. Let's have a pizza night. I'm going to make her a pizza night. Hey, we can have a pizza night coming up. So I was moving out.

Yeah. Hold on. He's packing up and moving out. I got the call of the day. He's moving by us. Yeah. Oh. He is.

I'm moving the tail. He's going to be three minutes from all of us. Time out. Time out. Is that not the best thing? Okay. Here's the text that I got today. Call me.

It's important. And I looked at it and it's, and it's, and it's, and it's, it's, Christine's assistant. So I call her, she was like, hey, we got, we got to get side Christine out of here. We got, got, got to, get some work we got to do. Got to take care of a little mold problem that they have from some water that was leaking. And so size is going to be out for about. three months. Oh, you're not moving, moving, moving.

Well, they sailed month. You're just... But I don't buy that. Something tells me, Si's going to move up from southern Worsetal Parish to the middle of the parish, and he may not go back. But I will say this. Oh, yeah.

Hey, Willie did say you could spend as long as you wanted to at the lodge. I know. He opened that up for you. Hold on. Where are you... I guess I can't ask where you're moving. It's right by where Martin lives. It's uptown.

I'm moving uptown. I'm like the, what's the family? Jefferson's. The Jefferson. Moving on. I'm going on. I'm moving on up. I finally got a piece of the pie.

Yeah. And what you're going to get is a piece of my kids. I'm about to drop them off. But drop them off. But this kind of makes me sad because Google Maps has finally given a size roof. Oh, it's from space. Oh, there it is.

Hey, there it is. And there's this trusty truck. Red, white, and blue. I conveniently zoomed in. You know, it's not. That's not hard to figure out. There's a bug in here still. Big dummy fly.

Oh. Yeah, Sa. Si. There's a fly in here we're trying to kill, and he's huge. You were too slow, son. We've had that problem. We can't get along up in my... Hey, that fly stick around to this weekend.

He ain't going to be here no more. No. Yeah, if he comes by me and lights, then with J.D. leaving long, I'll kill him. I missed him. I wish I had 28 guys, then I'd just blow him off the top of the table. You should just move to the neighborhood. The hood.

Move to the neighbor. You can be one of the outsiders of the gate like me. Move to the compound. Get on in there, I'll sell you my house right now. I'm not going to be outside of the gate. There ain't no more houses inside the gate. Who cares?

I'll build any one. There you go. Yeah, I'll find out. Well, they ain't going to sell you no land. I can't make people move out. That's right. You got the Robertson last name. How about that?

Yeah, because if he move in, somebody's moving out. That's right. Somebody can move out. Whoever's close to him. Yeah. I'll run them off. Yeah, he'll run them smooth. With the loud motor or the bad driving?

Both. You could probably go slide in an house place. He ain't over there. Yeah. He's a snowbird. He's at the beach. That's just, yeah, that's just a... Oh, man, I want to live in the same neighborhood.

He stays there once in a while when he's in town. Which ain't very off. In his modular. And, So you just got the chair that you love so much. Missed Mr. Christine got to this chair. You're taking it with you? Yeah, that's what I'm on miss when I go to uptown. You're going to take it?

take it, will you? No. That's huge. That's a big chair. Hey, friend, when you move, you take your furniture with you. Hey, no. I will move the kid. This kid ain't moving nothing.

The only thing he's moving, I'm going to get in that Ford pickup, and then go to the next address where I'm going to stay for about a month. There's maybe three. Would you like me and Martin to move your chair? No. Please don't sign me up for this. That's right. Mark said don't sign it.

I'm 40, man. Would you like me and Hunter to move your chair? There you go. He and Hunter will move. your chair. I'll supervise. I ain't worried about it. It's too much trouble.

Is it one of them chairs you plug in? Oh, yeah. Oh, so it's got a motor chair. It's got all. It's got all. Like a moving company brought it. Would you like Stone and Christian to move your chair? There.

Now we're getting on the right side of thing. So I just took a whack at the fly. Did you get it? I don't know if I did or not. No, you didn't. I really want him to be in your coffee cup. I'm ready to make pizza now. He's back pedaling.

Hunter do not forget that. in there. I didn't get him or didn't hit her enough. Hold on. You got to have him on a solid surface. He was on the head that didn't hit him. Oh, your cup. I didn't know where he was. So do you think there's a chance you could want to live uptown forever? No. Okay, so you're definitely going back? Hey, look. I got to sell a house. I wouldn't go in the first place if he said

that potato told me. Oh, your house now. Hey, you got to move out. Too many steps. It is, uh, I mean, you got COPD, so you don't need to be there when all these fours are flying. Yeah, they're That's what happened to my papal. They're tearing the floors up and redoing stuff. And I told, I told Simon Christine, y'all come stay with me, you know, just live with me. And I thought it was going to be a week. And he was like, well, it's going to be a little longer than a week.

I was like, well, a couple weeks. Well, about three months. I said, yeah, final. I haven't got a whole bunch of friends and I don't want to lose the few I got. Well, call God. If I move in, well, I lose it. Gobbon, Godwin been taking this straight. Godwin been taking in strays all the time.

Call Godwin. Well, no, no. Hey, you got to have the correct attitude to do that. That's what I'm saying. That's God. And I didn't get part of it. Mom and Dad had it. Phil and Kay had it.

And Phil and Kay had it. For hosting? Yeah. Or, well, yeah, it's taking them straight. Yeah. Taking it straight. Yeah, I have heard the stories. There are.

I can offer hospitality, but I can't offer hospitality without grumbling. I can offer hospitality. That's your piece to purpose. I know. Not your face of purpose. If you crumble, then you're not being hospitalized. I'm repenting. Well, I know you.

I'll say that. I can be hospitable and, like, give you a pizza, but I ain't giving you a bed and a shower. What about a bidet? I'd let you use my bidet. Okay. If you're ever in that part of the world, it seems like an awful person piece of equipment.

I want the Rolex and the bidet for one day. That's it, one day. One day, I'll let you roll. You have to sign a release. Hey, you look at that Rolex and say, well, it's time for the bidet. No, you just, you feel that more than you look. Yeah, you may look at the clock when it starts. Hey, I got a house with the bidet.

I'll sell it to you. Right around the corner from Willie. Oh, there you go. You could be so close to all your nephews. You could yell at Jeff over the pond. Yeah. I think Si appreciates a little bit of separation of church and state. Oh.

That's twice you've missed him. No way. Did you get it? I can get him, but it looked like I did. You sold it. I just took a shot at the fly. I knew it didn't have you. You sold it.

You sold it. You said it to me. I said he wished. Well, if you were saying it from over here, the look on his face was like pure shock. So I can't believe I did this. I don't know if you know this. I still get checks in the mail every quarter. You're sag certified.

That almost pays for lunch for being an actor. There you go. There's no right time for better health. There's just right now. Now. You can make the decision. right now. And AG1 is the easiest and most impactful habit that you can start when? Easy. Right now. Right now. I knew it had to do with one scoop.

One scoop will do you and it'll give you sustainable health. It's all about consistency, not perfection. And AG1 keeps it so simple. So consistency is easy. Just one scoop and you've got your multivitamin, your pre and probiotics, superfoods, and antioxidants covered. And how long does it take for one scoop? It don't take but a second. At 20 seconds, top, scoop water, drink, and you're done. The new AG1 next-gen formula has more vitamins and minerals than ever before to help fill everyday nutrient gaps. Every day, first thing in the morning. Philip, you're popping one too, Angel.

I'm popping one. Hey, I'm starting 2026 off right by drinking my AG1. Look, and that way you know you're doing something good for your body before your day really even starts. Look, you want to be regular? Boom, AG1. You want to build your immune system? Boom, AG1. You're like, what about flavors? They got a bunch of them, original, citrus, berry, tropical.

Philip, you've been drinking the original, haven't you? Yeah, I mainly stay on the original. AG1 has over 50,000 verified five-star reviews and comes with a 90-day money-back guarantees. So go to drinkag1.com slash to get their best offer, get three free AG1 travel packs and three free AGZ travel plaques plus free vitamin D3 plus K2 and AG1 welcome kit with your first AG1 subscription order. That's drinkag1.com slash drinkag1.com slash duck. I will say that Al and and Willie both were texting

me back and forth about concern person I and where he's going to go. And once they knew he's fine and everything's okay, everybody's good. All right, that covers two of them. You need to know that. What about Jason Jeff? Who? Jason Jep today. Who?

Jason Jep. Yeah, no. Robert. Is it a Zip. Well, apparently I'm a terrible friend. I didn't know. I don't care. I just found out.

Okay. Well, we all just found out. Well, I mean, I knew he had an alleged mold, but I guess now it's been confirmed. Yeah, it's been confirmed. Yeah, get out of there. And authenticated. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. New house, new floors, new teeth. They say not to change too much at one time, but you're changing everything. He skipped his haircut. It ain't my fault. He's still willing to do it, though, if we can do it in the duck car ring. We get to February. We get to man a haircut.

Yeah. I want a haircut right now. I do need a haircut, a little trim and a little beard trim and a mustache trim and a mustache trim. Mustache trim. I'm thinking about buying me the clippers. No. No. Don't do it.

Yes. No. Trim my beard and much. No. Here's why he can't have it. I've actually never noticed how long your eyebrow hairs are. Oh, that one. No, no.

Are you kidding? That left one, legit. Hey. That's a thing's longer than the hair on my head. Left what his little. Besides, when I went in the military, you got to look about him. The last time I was with my band,

Bridget said, hey, you need to get your horns trim. You were talking about my eyebrows. Oh, women pay good money to look like that all the time. Well, hey, look, I did. We had a gig going somewhere and said, hey, you need to trim beer a little. Yeah, you didn't look the same after that.

And you're horned. Here's why you can't have anything to cut your own eyebrows or trimming. Wow. Because you obsess with it. Whenever you get fingernail clippers or anything or tweezers, you obsess with it. If you start tweezing your face, I'm telling you, you go way too far with. Please your face.

True or false? Oh. Oh, he does. That week you had a go-tie. It was pretty rough on the boy's skin. I may say, I get started and said, yeah, let's go ahead and shave the whole mess and just do what I look. Oh, don't do that.

That fly up there on that light casting a shadow on me. That fly is going to be a minute. Go ahead and put that one in the show notes that we have a special guest. Larry, the fly. We could put a. We can put a band on that. When was the last time you were clean shaving? In the military.

Wow. That's been a while. I'm trying. Which is, 1999 would be the last time I'd done it. Did you keep your eyebrows underwrapped in? Oh, but I did one time when I shaved my beard. I did keep that and I was going to make. me, I was going to make me some fishing baits out of it.

Out of your beard? Yeah, out of my beard. Now you got teeth and hair. But I looked at it when I- On this day and age, you'd just catch a catfish. And put your mic. I know. I said, you know, I got to look at it.

I said, this ain't no good. I need a microphone. No, no fly. You saw a much. Oh. The fly just his side of the face. The fly. Okay, no, that fly just landed on his beard.

That was pretty fly. 100%. That sucker was a. pull, too. It's a huge fly. Pull your mic up and all the excitement. Hey, I looked at that, is that a bumblebee? I thought it was a bumblebee.

I don't have experiences with that. I'm around that like Jimmy Durandia for about two weeks in high school. Got another one. Got him. Oh, Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy. Hey, that sucker looked as big as a bumblebee, I'm telling you. Hunter, or are you the look on his face? He's like he just got violated.

It was my favorite part. Right in my face. I was daydreaming about getting you to a haircut and taking your hair and then making fishing baits and selling them on eBay. When you said all that. I bought it right. All that hit them was catfish. We're not going to tell the people that.

Hey, and mud cat is that. I was making a different joke about catfish. That's fine. Yeah. Yeah, I'm going to sell those things for like 40 bucks a piece. There you go. With a signature. I'm not a autographs signature.

You couple it with one of them teeth. You can get 100. That's what I said. You got to put one of them teeth in there. No, it's a jig. Hey, just what you're going to catch on that? If you use my hair, one of my teeth, you'll catch a dinosaur fish. Dinosaur.

Yeah, a dinosaur fish. I thought he's going to catch somebody from Alabama. Your beard's got a good Louisiana shad color to it. We can make that work. What's that? A rosy, Especially if you take some of them 117.

The stuff that the women use is turning their hair purple and orange and green. Well, we're not, no, we're not trying to make it rainbow color. It's called die. Side die. Fish and cast.

I want this all natural. I could actually make a pretty good jig out of your eyebrows. There ain't much there. There is on that other side. That left side is a hole. Well, hey, that's place they trimmed it. You know, about a half a bubble off.

on the left side. That left side's a man. Got him. Should you, so you're not ever going to shave your face again? Have you made that decision? Why would he? I wouldn't say,

never. Okay. It's nice to be able to do what you want to do. Well, I'm talking about if somebody come up just said, I don't know how I'd feel if he came out with no face. A figure of a money, money involved.

Oh. You would do, then I may shave it. I have seen you turn down a while. No, I didn't have to eat more chicken for a nominal fee. What about the guy that wanted to buy that cup of yours? I should have sold it.

I told you to sell it. No, no. I was saying, sell it. Jason, hey, does a man come up in just today? I said, what? He said, I want to buy that teacup you got. We were at Willie's restaurant in the back. And he said, hey, blank check.

You fill out to him out, and I'll pay it. This is a true story. I was there. happen. Look, I've had that happen about three times. A blank check is not really a blank check. Hey, I've had that happen three times with me. And as of yet, I haven't one time said, well, hey, what's the check? Let me fill in the blank. Let's see if you'll cash it. No, you just tell them next time, cash only. Yeah. I said, yeah, forget the check. I don't want to sign my name. You probably, yeah, cash. The government doesn't need to know about any

teacup transaction. No, I'm trying to decide if I ever want to see my face again. I don't. I don't think I won't see my. No, you don't. No, I don't care to see my. I really don't. It's not what you think it is.

I know. I know he's not. Probably it's curious. I wonder what your kids would say. Uh-oh. Oh, hey, you're watching. It's behind you. I feel like I'm back.

Ladies and gentlemen, the fly is back. Here he comes back. Here he comes. He's circling around JD. He's right up there. It's something about JD, a smell, a stench that it's.

It's over. you while you're saying that sir i called trying to call him i done lost him now mark when was the last time you shave hey i wish that chunker land here he's on my microphone he's on the back of it get him he gone we killed it did he get him oh he's stuck in the microphone don't move him there he's stuck in the microphone he's quiverance he's quiverance leave him there as a message to all of his friends don't pop him again or zoom in right there don't don't pop him again, boys. Can he zoom in? He got him.

That flies. Hey, that's for lighting on my nose. I was about to throw this Sharpie at him, but I didn't think I could hit it. I bet you didn't. Hunter is now zooming in. To those listening and not following us on YouTube, you should really, the show takes a whole new level on YouTube. Be sure to like and subscribe. YouTube. Well, I know he misses dogs and ducks, but he hits flies. Hey, come on. Hey. What are you doing, Hunter? I did. I missed that fly.

Let's stay in there. He's breaking out. He's breaking out the tools. He's breaking out the tools. Oh, he's still quivering. Hey, wrap him in death cloth. Wrap him in death cloth. We're going to bury him.

Hunter got a disinfectant wipe to move a fly. He's trying to make sure if his boss is watching. Hit the gong for us. He's trying to stay above board. Here's what it is. He gone. Another one hit the dust. Where were we?

Talking about would you ever shave again. Ow. I'm no. I'm curious. I don't think so. It's been very recent lately, but every once in a while I'm like, I don't know what's under there. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up.

You know what that means? That means more outside cooking. And y'all know we love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Triedale's beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good? It's so good. Our friend, Sao Robertson, would say, buy on the grill!

Look, before we got Triedells, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes from. But with Triedales beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Triedales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth-generation American ranch, so they've been at it for a while.

Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic.

So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Tritale's beef. I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat me. She ain't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. What I'd like to do is just go ahead and cut me a Mohawk.

Oh, that'd work if you had the most. No, no. Well, hey. All you got left is a hawk. No, no. Well, hey. He's got less hawk. Mohawk looking in.

Hey, had the women with the spray. that's hairspray. Yeah, just make it like a sharp knife. I'm not sure if you've looked up there lately, but it ain't there, son. Well, hey. Well, I know that's why, hey, that's why you said just. That's the cutoff.

So you got a less hawk. Yeah. Less hawk? Yeah. Hey, it's creep. I'm going to pause. I told you. I took a picture.

I'm getting there. I'm trying to hate because as a man who is slick up top. himself. A mohawks out of the picture. Hey, I thought I'd have a boy of hair less than that. I'm going to grow one. Next, he's going to be going to Turkey. Here's your Indiana hat to wear. He's going to be going to getting Turkish hair implants next.

He got them teeth. Hey, look he here. Hoosiers. That coach had a look about him, didn't he? Yeah. I never saw him smile. He's got, hey, the grin. He's got an insane look about him.

But the boy knows football. Yeah, he could have been like a criminal. mind's character. Yeah. Maybe he is. He could have been in the movie The Silence of the Land. Ooh. Hey.

I've never seen that. You didn't say, you've had, how? Who stars in that? Anthony. Anthony Hopkins. You hadn't watched it? And Jody Foster. And Jody Foster.

I wasn't allowed to watch that. Oh yeah. When it came out, John, Dundee was way too young. Buffalo Bill, you know, puts the lotion off. I thought that was from Joe Dirt. Well, Joe Dirk was spoofing that. I don't even watch scary shows.

Was she some great big fat person? I haven't, yeah, I was two. I was definitely a lot of. Don't watch this show. Hannibal Lecter. I'm still not interested now that I can make my own decisions. With the blood on, the blood on like lipstick. It's from that time frame.

So like now you look back at it and you're like, oh, wow. It's just cinema has gotten a lot better. No, it hasn't. I don't know. I'm telling you right now, Jurassic Park still holds up. Oh, Jurassic Park is for kids. Yes, I said Jurassic Park is for kids. Silly Rabbit.

You silly rabbit. I'm glad your microphone wasn't on. No, look, we've been watching these movies. I'm not going to say which movies because I feel like a huge nerd when we're watching them. Go ahead. Nailed it. I won't. Nailed it.

Allison wants, we're watching. You know what would have been good? Tell us, side. Back in the day when they actually roam this earth to be here and then have a pet. There's a whole movie of why that's a bad idea. The big teeth guy, have a pet, big teeth guy. Yeah, that's true. T-Rex.

Yeah, T-Rex. Anyway, we have a pet T-Rex. We've been watching Harry Potter. Yeah. And it's like the graphics stink. And I don't believe it. Bongo rolled a buffalo in. I'd ride a T-Rex here.

And I still think the Jurassic is. that part dinosaurs were real dinosaurs that they filmed but they haven't showed us with you hey there you go i know where they got the sound they got from howler monkeys no real dinosaur i think it happened hey he's said he's happened it happened buddy i want to start a whole conspiracy and everybody is getting on to me about seeing a black panther is a documentary now that would be something to see was a dinosaur yeah what you think martin go down hey go down to the go down the Lake Darbon with old, old Galway, and be out there fishing and then have T-Rex come swimming by you.

I'm out on that. I don't think that's fun. That's a real bad idea, especially if you hear of cell phone. That'd be something to see. It is fun fishing with Godwin, though. You think they think a T-Rex could swim very fast. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Touch the bottom. Yeah, all dinosaurs swim because it showed them in water. It is Will Campbell. Look at him. Hey, the wildest was as a fish dinosaur. Like seven people got that joke. I don't know. I was one of them.

Right, Rubin Bain? Anyways. John David. Because they looked so real, they used a lot of life-sized animatronics for it. What? For the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park. Yeah, and it's awesome. Yeah.

Nowadays, movies aren't even believable. Well, see, hey, that's like, and that was like a lot of people. Hold on. When was the last time you watched? it. Not that long ago, unfortunately.

And you were in, you were immersed. No, I looked at it and like, man, we've come a long way with graphics. On Jurassic Park?

Yeah. We're not friends anymore. That's fine. Okay, we're friends again, but you're wrong. Anyway, we've got so many

non-believers. In what, Black Panther? Well, no, no, no, and everything. They don't believe in a dinosaur.

I don't believe you're right about that. They don't believe in the flood. Who doesn't believe in dinosaurs? A lot of people. There are a lot of them. They say, They don't agree. They don't, you know, what about all them pits we got up in California that's got all

them bones ticking out of them? They don't believe the earth is round. That's right. Don't believe the earth's around. That's right. Don't believe it's flat. Fall off of it. 50-50.

If you fall off the earth, you'll scream. Would you? I can hear them from here. But if you fell off the edge of the earth, how fast would you fall? Could you even hear it because you'd fall so fast? Oh, no. Oh, yeah. No, that's like a tree-maker noise if it falls in the first.

far as nobody there to hear it. Hard to say. How do you know? You're not there to hear it. But does it typically make the noise? It makes noise. I don't know. That's like if I sticky with a pen, you'll make noise.

Please don't. Well, I had a friend of mine. You remember Ray Milton? They were going to raise a guy from the dead at this place. Him and his buddy went, and he took a big stick pen with him, and they walked by the casket. He stuck that needle in there, and that old boy come up out of that casket, and they said, it's a miracle.

He said, yeah, I just tested with my pen. That's a true story. What? You know Ray Melston. Where did this come from? Hold on. This was in Texas. Hold on.

Our old preacher, I'll send you up. Time out. You can't tell a story that involves raising a human being from the death. And then just like glance over it. Like, you all know what you're talking about. So here's what happened. So Ray, Ray Melton, he was an old. He was a preacher at WFR.

Yeah, great guy, loving. In like the 60s 70s. That's right. Region. That's right. They're at a funeral. And he's a good cowboy Texas guy. Anyway.

Okay. So, no. So there was a big, they were doing a big sign to do about come to this meeting where we're going to raise the dead. And there's a casket there with somebody laying in it. And so him and his buddy said, yeah, this guy, if you're going to raise the dead, he ain't dead. This was like a church that. He has. So they.

They were, somebody was claiming to perform miracles. Yes. And so Ray brought that long needle and him and his buddy walked by and he said, I just got to know. He stuck that into his leg and the guy come up out of there. He said, I pulled it off. It's a miracle. He's alive. I don't know.

And, yeah, and the whole thing was, you know. A fraud was being perpetrated. Yes. So there was a fraud and Ray shut it down. He shut it down. Well, now I have a real live experience like that. Okay, but, you know. Lazarus?

No, no, look, there's a guy on the top farm in the barracks, army barracks. He's into the yoga position. He is not there. Which yoga position? Yeah. Hey, just, just Yoda position. Not downward dog. He's getting his Zen.

Okay. No, he's in a Yoda position. And one of the guys. He's not there. Well, hey, I'm a skeptic. And I said, I don't believe you. About that time, he just turned around and there's a whole group of students in the barrack. And he said, hey, anybody got a sewing kit?

And the guy said, yeah, I got one. He said, hey, bring me the biggest needle you got out of that throwing kit. And this is in Vietnam? No, this is in the States. Okay. In boot camp. So, hey, he brings the needle, one of the big ones. and he just puts it between his index finger and thumb

and he said well how much you only leave sticking out a needle no no no no and I you know everybody said well about a quarter inch to be all right so look so he's got a quarter of each of a needle sticking out of and this is the guy who's in he's in some kind of state no no it's another guy doing we're doing this he's sitting there he's sitting there and he's got his eyes closed okay Well, I don't believe it. He said, since you don't believe him, hey, you take the needle because you could say, hey, nope, I didn't push it.

You know? Martin can't take it. Hey, Mark can't. So look, hey, look, I stuck that needle a quarter inch in this boy's butt. Look, I pull it out, okay. He's got a white shorts. Because this, we let's fix you go to bed at night. Well, hey, there's a blood.

about the size of a quarter coming out of his underwear. And I said, well, scratch that about I'm not a believer. Because he never moved. I said, because, hey, he didn't move, didn't flinched, didn't do nothing. What happened when he came to? Hey. Beat the crap. He whoops.

He said, somebody didn't believe it, did it? When the guy woke him up, he just said, somebody didn't believe it. He said, good grief, you stuck in it in a pretty doth. Look, it's a new year, and that means a big thank you for all your support in 2025 from our friends at MyPillow is in order. And now they're ready to make 2026 another great year, maybe even the best year. And nothing says thank you like free shipping on your entire order and wholesale pricing, right? That's a great deal. That's a good, boys.

Best deal around because you know why classic MyPillow is regularly 4998 are now only 1798, but don't stop there. A set of Giza dream sheets for as low as. 2998 or the six-pack Godwin special towel set for only $39.98. Godwin, what's number one calls it? That's the way you get dry skin. All the way. The one guy. So whether you're after bed sheets, whether you won't go slipping around your house, because it's finally kind of feels like winter outside again now. Don't kind of feel like. It is more. Are you flip into one of them comfortable road? There you go. Look, to get the best specials every.

go to MyPillow.com slash or call 1-800-9-6-9-3-137 and use the promo code. These offers won't last long, so visit MyPillow.com slash or call 1-800-9-6-9-3-3-7 and use promo code. Don't wait. Shoot the day immediately. Shop today, baby. The things that happen at boot camp. I'm not cut out. Boot camp after.

Oh, hey, look, if I hadn't been there, I wouldn't believe unless I saw it. Where was he, though, in his mind? He left, no, no, he left his body. I'm telling you. But where did he go? This man literally left his body. Because he was not there. Because, hey, I don't know if anybody that could take a quarter inch needle and not move.

At least flinch. That's crazy. This kid, hey, I mean, hey, the muscles didn't tighten up. Nothing happened. Do it to Johnny D. Just don't tell him when you're going to do it. No, no. I guarantee you.

He'll jump, you. Squill. Squall like Janet Joplin. Hey, I'm telling you. I just look and said, well, yeah, I believe now. I believe. Well, we, I believe now because I've actually saw it because I'm the one that was holding the eel. I was down at your brother's house, you know, a few years ago, and we had a guy down there.

And he told Phil, he said, I died three times, you know. People love to tell Phil stories like. that. Yeah. I've seen the light as to the tone. And Phil said, nope. He said, oh, yeah, the doctor said I was on table. I died three times. He said, let me ask you something. Did you see the judge? The judge? He said, uh, no, what are you talking about? He said, it's destined for man to die once and then face judgment. Did you see the judge? No. Yeah. No death. You didn't see no death. Well, boys, judgment day. Oh, I thought you were going to tell them about the one is, hey, Phil was preached to you.

And then said, hey, Phil told him, said, you got two major problems there, son. Oh, no, yeah. I was there for that one. Hey, he's telling this kid the gospel. Yeah. You got two major problems you got to deal with. Same problem.

You have done something wrong in your lifetime, right? He said, oh, yeah. He said, well, hey, then you are going to go in the grave. Everybody's going to die one day. Everybody's going to die. And the kid said, oh, though, you ain't putting that guilt trip on me. got up next day you hear is the tire squalling and the pickup truck.

Yeah, this guy, this guy was like, wait a minute, you're not going to tell me that I'm going to die. And Phil said, he started laughing. He looked at me, he said, yeah. He said, every man's going to die. You're going to die one time. He said, face it, you're going to die. Well, hey, look, next thing you hear is tire squalling.

He left and squalled, yeah. Three weeks later, Philip called Phil and said, Hey, Phil, you know that old boy I brought down another? You know, three weeks ago? He said, guess what? Phil said, all. He said, yep. I was in a bar.

Got a knife to death. He certainly did. That was God giving that kid one more chance. Yep. And he didn't move on it. Yeah. Yeah. Which is sad.

But hey. Yeah, we turn really into good news. Because if you don't believe that, hey. That took a fun. turn if you don't believe that god almighty that's a true story hey since people two people you need to wake up yeah you need to be like that guy jumped up out of that casket yeah you need to wake up oh hey i would pay good money i've seen that i want you to ask your parents about that i know ray's probably talked about it i mean your dad probably knows that i'll ask dad when i get back to the shop

for sure that's crazy that's wild but yeah i don't know what it is you know people that they they They want to see things and see a vision. I had a friend of mine that I was talking to, and he was going through a hard time toward the end of his life because he was suffering from some stuff. And I was sharing the gospel with him, and he was like, well, I ain't seen a vision yet, you know? And I said, well, you may not see a vision,

but you still need Jesus more than you need the next fresh breath of air, you know? And he was like, no, I mean, my uncle saw a vision, in it. I'm like, well, if you're waiting on a miracle, you can see one ever five minutes. Yeah. And hey,

you still would not be saved. Yeah, no. We saw Philip kill that fly, which I, boom, that was a miracle. Hey,

that was a good shot. I don't disagree. That one stuck him into the microphone. Hey, I was mad because I missed him. You did. Here's the thing, here's the thing about miracles

that gets me, though. What? is that we've got too many con men that are faster with their hands than your eyes can keep up with? A magician? Huh? See?

Oh, yeah. Well, we've just got too many a common. And hey, got you noticed. You think it's amazing what they can do. Okay, but hey. I feel like we're going back to the last part in your life. You saw it.

How does it affect you? Yeah. Did it do anything good for you? for you? I remember we went to a place and all they talked about was, you know, because look, I have seen miracles. I've seen them myself. I watched a boy who was dying. He had no chance to live and I saw him two years later and he lived through it. That's healthy. I mean, and look, when I left, I just knew he was going to die because I mean, my faith is weak. okay but this kid lived and to see something like that'll change you you know i mean

god is more powerful than than anybody knows and anybody but here was the thing in that there was no miracle it performed by any human being that that wasn't no hocus pocus either this wasn't no hocus pocus trick okay all we did was someone came to me that had cancer and said uncle sigh would you say a prayer to the almighty uh-huh for me and I said I'd be honored to. So we said a prayer, okay, left, felt like crap, okay, because this kid was on his way out. You knew this by when you looked at him. Oh yeah.

Well, two years later, fast forward two years, we met him again, him and grandpa. Yep. Well, he's alive. Yep. But my point was, sigh, is that when we went to that one church and you told that story, then everybody there was like let's see if we can do some more miracle signs

I was like miracles ain't going to save you I said hey only Jesus saves you know no no because the guy kept saying hey if you need a miracle come on down and then side had one mic and the other guy had another mic he said if you need a miracle come down

and then sigh was like but a miracle ain't going to save you I said hey you got to have I said hey you got to have Jesus involved in the saving part ain't no doubt Okay, because, hey, you could see it and be involved in it. Yeah.

And, hey, that ain't going to cover your sin. No. Okay, we've got two problems. We've got a sin problem just like Phil tried to tell that kid. Yeah. You've got a sin problem. You've done something wrong. You've broken man's law plus God's law.

Mm-hmm. Yep. Well, hey, there's a reckoning coming for that. Yeah. You're going to be charged with it. and when you stand before the maker he's going to say okay what have you got for me

if you got a legitimate excuse that will cover it yeah well that there ain't one that's why it's important I mean we're talking about things that you know people trying to pull off acting like they're raising people from the dead and some you know

some stuff that you see that the hands are quicker than the eye but look that's that stuff ain't going to hold up I'm sure you saw a bunch of stuff when you were in NOM you know, crazy stuff like that. Well, I would say if you could talk to and if they would open up and be honest with you, our veterans could tell you things that they saw and that they went through, that trust me, when I tell you, hey, they may not have believed Jesus in the beginning,

but after they've seen what they went through, they believed in and then. Yeah. okay you see a guy standing next to you lose his head yeah no i mean yo hey if you're if that don't wake you up yeah well side not only that but when martin was going through things you know uh with his kids and they were young when when johnny d went through some things with his kids and me and my wife were going through that if you don't have a community of people i mean it's really going to be well if you don't have a support group yep or someone to support you in that time.

To go through it alone, oh, hey, it drives some people nuts. Okay, because, hey, the human being wasn't meant to have that. Yeah. You handle that. That's my humble opinion. No, you're right. You're not meant to go through it.

Speaking of wacky. Hello at dot callroom.com. Hey. The inbox. 318, 2,15, 6, 55, 9 is the phone number. You want to hear a crazy dream, Zai? Mine's well. You want to hear a crazy dream?

Angela, she's having... Summit? No, different. Don't tell it. Huh? Don't tell what. Is that somebody we know? No.

This is a hello at dot call room email I just read that makes me kind of giggle. You know how sometimes you got some stuff and they put you on some stuff to make you sleep and you dream real hard? Mm-hmm. she was in the ER in her dream and the door opened up and who's the doctor? No.

Si. No. Run. Hey. No. Run. And she said, all I could remember

is me trying to tell him my problem and he just kept saying no, no, hey. No, no. Hey. I'm having trouble breathing. No, no.

Let me tell you what you got. No, you ain't. I'm having trouble. Let me tell you a story. No, hey. Hit this oxygen. Hey. And I was in numb.

Here's the cure for you, darling. Don't watch any more, Doug Nash. No, quit drinking. That's that dream weaver. Oh, that's so funny. You're not supposed to mix those pills with wine. I would love to have a weird dream about size sometimes. No, I'd like to have the interpretation.

Oh, here we go. No, on some of them I've had. We would too. Because last night I had one. Did you jump from mountain to mountain and start falling? Oh, no. Oh, yeah, I have this is last night. No, no, hey.

No, hey. Yeah. That is a recurring dream that I get myself in a position. Okay. Well, I'm always, I ain't got one thing to do. I'm on top of them out and you got to jump. And do you jump? And I jump.

And nothing ever happens. He wakes up before he hits a ground. Yeah, four hits a ground. But the other night, I'm in, I'm in field, a red Toyota pickup four-wheel drive. And I'm against a wooden fence. and hey this baby is i mean it you tell me that muddy i got this thing out near buried and we're going still going forward because i'm not going to stop this is a joe yeah this is a dream

i have trouble hey if i wake up look i'm wake up and i'm going because i'm fighting this steering wheel and this four-wheel driving this mud for like hours that was your dream you were just that was my right you didn't get no rest that night it was Stuck in a rut, baby. Now he's stuck in a rut. I was what you would call stuck in a rut. He's went from out of control falling to stuck in the rut. Couldn't get out of the mud.

It probably means you have to move. I was moving. No, you're going to have to move homes. Godwin had a nightmare while we were going down the road. So I was driving and telling me a story. And Godwin started hollering in the back. and I looked and we're in the wrong lane with oncoming traffic but science telling me a story looking at me he yanks it over and he just keeps telling the story

and God was like y'all name somebody else I don't remember all this we're driving out to our friend Clay's oh that was that night I don't remember all that you were you were telling the story Clay's isn't hold on that's not far enough away for a someone to take a nap and B to get in the wrong lane You obviously don't travel much with Si, Oregon No, you don't They only need about three minutes of nothing

And they are out, buddy I don't sleep in a car They can sleep in a vehicle quickly Uh, mm-hmm Uh-huh Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Because he was a way better road trip partner when he smoked.

Why is that? Because he was awake. Yeah, the way, always laughing. Always trying that's a plus him. Now he'd get over a kick at oxen on it. Oh, yeah. And when he goes to Steve with me, he's, I make him listen.

the yacht rock smooth yacht rock put anybody to sleep I love it yeah oh man whatever we got anything else or not we got invited back to the crispy cream marathon oh oh oh I think I need to do it eat a donut every mile general race information it's the crispy cream

challenge in Raleigh North Carolina North Carolina I'll be in North Carolina this week I'll go where you will you really Fayetteville yeah that's good country Johnny D I want to go if you do it It's on February 7th. I don't think I can make it by then. Good country. You have to eat a whole donut.

You have to eat a dozen donuts in the middle of a race. It just sounds awful. You'll be hunting with Jay Stone that weekend. That's where my girlfriend lives. You should go. Hunter, Hunter, go run. Hunter, when was the last time you ran for any reason whatsoever at all?

Whether it be... Something chasing you? Or exercise or... If you ever see me running? I have an answer to that. What? shoot what's chasing him words of wisdom from the Lord are you going to have for us well we we got a few more minutes huh hunter's got some uh voicemails from us oh for us we got from us

i should call in and leave voice mail three one eight two one five six five five nine hey uh i was just wondering what martin or anybody else what do you normally play as when you play in the mario card what character is it's called from mississippi the new one The new one, I'm Black Yoshi. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, what's this? You can't be Yoshi. I like Black Yoshi.

What? Tell you. Because he drives a, because he drives a BMW, a black BMW. I'm all blacked out. Tell side what you're talking about, Martin. Do you ever play a video game? A video game. Yeah.

And what's your name of it? Mario Kart. Har. You just, you race with Mario character. Oh, maybe he hit a banana pill. You're in trouble. Spent. I'm disappointed in you.

Why? You're not a Yoshi kind of guy. I like the whole blacked out beamer look. He's not a blacked out beamer kind of guy. I know, but that's why video games are fantasy. You go be something you're not in real life. You only have two choices that are correct. What?

You know the two. Bowser? One of them. Donkey Kong. There's the other. See? I don't like, see? Why are you trying to get away from who you are, man?

It's only that donkey car. That's back when they only had eight characters. Now they got like 75. It's too many now. It's too much. It's too much. but I like black Yoshi. But I'm Yoshi.

That's fine. You can't be Yoshi if I'm Yoshi. Sure. They have like nine colors of Yoshi on this. Hey, we let, you know. Well, you have to wear a black watch and be Twinkies if y'all both want to be Yoshi. It sounds like a bunch of racists on this game.

You used to be Toad, so I don't even want to hear it. Did you say racers or racist? Racist. I just matched my car car. You all got all these colors. You're racist. Well, they got orange, blue, yellow. You got a bunch of racists in this thing.

Generic green. But yeah, that's it. On the new one. Fine. But I've got it saved. It's like four buttons. Do you have any portions in this car game? Portions?

Portions? No, no portions. The only brand. The only brand is a Beamer, yeah. I guess I hadn't played that one. I got mad the last time I lost to my kids and realized that we were coming to a new... Oh, he got beat by...

World Order. They beat you? I ain't playing this crap no more. Yeah, that beat the dog out of them. Both of them? That's a toughie. It's tough life. Yeah.

You ought to play golf. I'd not. I play Brittany, so... Tiger Wood golf. Oh, here we go. Hey, I'm telling you. They said, I have played tagging. Then you got to pull the shark move.

Over this fairway, and there's a bunch of trees in between you and the green, which makes a big U-turn. Yep. That video game did a number on you, man. You still remember it. Hey, that's a good game. It burned an image and sized miles.

I'd have loved to have been a fly on the wall to watch you and your son play each other in a video. You think there was any arguments going on? Buddy, buddy, buddy. Would that have been so good? We made some fantastic shots. Well, yeah, it's a video game. Remember when you got into golf or something? unknown apparent reason?

Yeah. Why? Because the Duck Dynasty. That wouldn't last. And Jay says, said I couldn't coach him. And he was right, because he's uncutable.

Uncoachable, boy. Because he's so hard-headed. Kind of like? Listen. Where do you get that from? I don't know. That's genetic. He stayed with me as a child too long.

And Eric, uh, Eric, we don't know where Eric's from. He did email you in. So, I think he's from England. because he spells favorite funny.

Whether you? Yeah. Does that mean you're from English? He's one of the script. He could be, yeah. Eric, I need you to email me back and tell me where you're from because you spell favorite funny.

But he asked, what's your favorite episode of Duck Dynasty? Mine? He ain't never seen it, man. True. Mine? How many episodes have you watched? How many seasons did we have?

13. He's watched 13. He's watched 13. He's watched 13. There's a hundred. Watch 13 episodes of you. episodes then. Yeah.

When everybody gets another to watch. For all the, for all the premiere parties. That's the only ones he's been a part of. And he just ate, right. He said, answer his question.

How many episodes have you watched? There's my question. I, none. You've never watched another. I don't watch that, but you remember it being filmed. So what was your favorite time when you were?

My favorite one was, was okay, was with me and fat boy. Martin? No. The little fat CEO of Dr. I'm not skinny. Willie.

No, back then, not now. I'm not skinny now either. Hey. Guilty is charged. They had me handcuffed. You and Willie were handcuffed together. Oh, yeah. And the funniest part of that whole, the best episode was.

Here, hold my teacup. Well, look. I told Willie here, hold my teacup because he swatting. I said, hey, I said, I held something to the gallon jug first and it's just down at the bottom. I said, hey, it was full. I said, it was full when I came to work this morning. I said, you see it's about three-quarters of empty? I said, guess what?

He said, oh, no. I said, oh, yeah. So look, all they see, all you can see of me and Willie is my shoulders, our shoulders and head. And about that time, Willie said, you just peed on my hand. I said, well, get it out of the way, it is? He said, put the teacup in another hand. I said, nope.

I already got something in that hand. The funny thing is, size's not telling you. this from what he saw on TV. Because he didn't watch it. No, this is what happened. That's what happened. That was the scene. Yeah.

Yeah. That's a good one. How do we get you to watch Duck Dynasty? Would you ever watch it just for fun? You would have to pay me money to watch that. We do it on Twitch. Hey, we used to watch it. And we live streamed side watching Duck Dynasty.

The only time I would actually see the episode is when we would have premier night when the week. Yeah. That's why I said. We're getting the season. That's why I said 13 is how many you've seen. Third, third, Martin, I think I just got a business idea, so.

Well, hey, hold on. We can do it. We could live stream you watching Duck Dynasty and people can subscribe and pay us to say their names or something. He just did that with Willie and Corey for the new show for the revival. Let's go home. I got to go to work. Why would I go home?

Oh, by the way, stay warm out. there. If you're in the middle of America. Oh yeah. So they're thinking colder. Yeah, stay warm. When are you moving? Huh? You might be moving in the middle of an ice storm, man.

This is one of them things. Hey, I'm just doing what I told. Nah, let the ice go. Well, it ain't going to do nothing when it's free. All right, when it comes, they will let me know. Get the truck. Huh? You just need to get out there for springtime for it starts warming back up.

You'd be a height while I stay cold. That's why one of the greatest insults on earth is you stink on ice. Stink on ice. It's hard to stink on ice. It is. Not impossible, but hard. Very difficult. Isaiah 43-2, when you pass through the waters.

What? No, go ahead. You said, uh-oh. Well, I just, we just had that last time. He likes it. Isaiah 43-2, when you pass through the waters, I'll be with you, and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned.

The flames will not set you a blizzard. Thank you.