Duck Call Room - Uncle Si Outs a Robertson Wife for Her Stinky Smells!

Episode Date: March 23, 2023

Si has a BIG scoop on which Robertson wife broke wind TWICE during a car ride in NYC. Plus, why is Phillip taking advice from a bathroom attendant in Miami? Martin and John-David want to create brackets for the best snacks, and they rate the best bathrooms from all over the world. The boys are shocked into silence when John-David declares the "best" snack out there. Phillip tries to get the boys to agree that marshmallow Easter candies are delicious. The boys discuss troublesome dumps, and Si has a hard-and-fast rule for hunters: Don't take a crap in a man's deer stand or duck blind! Si marvels at God's sense of humor. John-David gives great advice to a fan planning a worship event. And Martin and Si share encouragement for anyone going through a difficult time in their marriage.  -- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We should make an interactive bracket. Your favorite episode. People always do brackets this time. This is the time of year where brackets rule the world. They put brackets on everything. We got a basketball bracket. Yep. Yeah.

And then everybody's like, you know, we should do a bracket on? And it's busted. Everything. I used to do a bracket every year on random unrelated things. That was my favorite one. What should our bracket be? We should make one for the fan. Or at least have the fans submit one and then we'll make one and then we can decide.

We can fill it out. I vote for food. Fried chicken. Fried chicken in the world. Chick-fil-A's a one seed. We're not going to be. Popeyes is the number one overall. I like churches.

We're not going to be. Whoa. See, that's why we need a bracket. You like church's chicken? When me and Sao were in Miami, they said, we went to a restaurant. No, you did not go to Miami and eat Church's chicken. No, no, no, we didn't. But this is the tip I got.

Because that's a great food town, man. He brought some home with them in his suitcase. He probably did do that. We were at a swanky joint where we were eating, and it was swanky. I went in the men's room, and when I came out, the guy handed me a towel, and I'll wash my hands, and he said, try the fried chicken. It's the best you've ever eaten. The best? So I try fried chicken in Miami, and churches got it beat by far.

Oh, my God. I had to filet mignon. And that was good. That's what I should have went with. Way to go out on a limb. I will say the best fried chicken I've ever had. My friend has a restaurant in St. Louis. Yeah.

And you can't beat that. Grace meeting three. If you're in St. Louis, go to Grace meeting three. See my boy Rick. The problem is if we do fried chicken, man, there's a lot of gas stations around the world. Like, we ain't going to be able to sample up.

Some of it, we're just going to have to, like, guess that. We're 64. I mean, you just guessed the best 64. My boy Rick's a one seed against Popeye. Uh-oh. Well, see, you can't do that unless you can sit them out here and like, Hunter, I need you to order a 64, well, times four. Different pieces of fried chicken.

64 buckets, boys. And for me, there needs to be at least 64 thighs. Yeah, I was about saying all thighs, baby. Or legs. No, get off that. So I likes the legs. The legs are wings. Oh, no.

Yeah. I like legs, 64 legs. Let's get the legs, boys. Phillips a leg, man. He's 5'6. That's 5.7. Thank you. I mean, hey.

Give me more credit. Give me a, give me that. I'm sorry. We would have a good bracket here because the people that listen to this are from little old sweet ladies to 12-year-old kids. I'm kind of interested if they'll send their own in. But like, how quick can it get here? Or do they just bring it? Yeah, or they just bring it in a basket.

Oh, man. That would be. People start showing up with baskets full of fried chicken and leaving it in the best. We've got your fried chicken. Everybody brought in their own bucket of chicken. Tell me, but okay, try it buying. Yeah. I mean, don't dare me to.

I like the idea you come up here, boy. Yeah, and I'm going to tell you, I like Keynes chicken. I know that's not everywhere, but that's good chicken. I mean, solid. All they do is chicken. Strips. Chicken strip. Boneless chicken.

You don't eat boneless chicken, do you? Don't go there. Don't go there. Yeah. Are you getting? He was trying to make a joke here. Oh, boy. I ain't going that route.

I ain't going that route. I ain't going that right. So is that what our, is that, I mean, are we good? I don't think we do fried chicken. No. We could do movies, but then it would be like we'd have to have a full bracket of westerns for Si. Yeah. That would be the southwest region.

Cattle drive, son. It's all about cattle drives. What about snacks? Where is the beef? That is actually our bang zone. That's a good one. We could procure snacks. That's right.

We could get 64 snacks. Yeah. Little Debbie Christmas tree cakes, clearly a one seed. Nobody has to send those in because I'm very well aware of how they taste. I can vote on that one without eating. We're going to taste it anyway. That's clearly a one seed. I don't see it getting them set.

That's a one seed. Is that a one seed? That might be a two seed. I'm a, I'm a dots pretzels, man. Not a regulation pretzel. I need a whiteboard. Yeah. Well, we'll just have to make it.

So, fans, hello at duckcallroom.com, submit your favorite snacks. If there's some kind of regional thing that we won't know nothing about, address is 117, Kings Lane, Westman, or Louisiana. Bring it. Bring it. Fake it. Fake it to you make it. But like if it's peanut M&Ms, I get that.

We know what those tastes like. We can put them there. I really love what you just did there. What's that? We gave them our address so we get more snacks. Well, if it's regional, don't send us nothing. We can go buy. Like, but if it's something that's hard to get,

some places you're going to have to send it in if you want us to vote on it. I found one online. Of snacks? I found it. Or a blank bracket. Cheezits are not a one seed, people. They're not. Whoever made this bracket, get out.

Yeah, that's out. Cheez-its-it's a one-seed? I like cheesots, but they're not. Now, Butterfinger is going to have to be a one-seed. What? Yeah. For Butterfinger? And anything with chocolate almonds has got to be at least a two-seed.

Okay. Feels out. It feels out. No. Hold on. We're doing this. when you're not here. Yeah, we're going to have to bring in the big gut, Godwin.

Uh-uh. Send some sugar. Hey, almond, chocolate. Hey, it's two seeds. There you go. Thank you, sir. Hey, I'm confused. You're dazed and confused.

That's right. What? I'm not dazed and confused. I'm, well, I mean, look at it. Do you really think his opinion on food is valid? So butterfingers and chocolate almonds. Oh, hey. There's going to be some upset.

That's in round one. Oh, no. We're going to have a 16 beat of one. Oh, no. I'm with a 16 to be in one. So we need like a salty snack bracket, a sweet bracket, a sweet bracket, candy? Yeah, if you're into that. Who's not into candy?

I don't really care for candy, but. Are you talking about, like, Swedish fish and junk like that? You're not in for a good bunch of almonds that mixed with chocolate? That's not candy. Yeah. That would be in the chocolate. There's a stone chocolate. When he's talking about candy, he's talking about like airheads.

Airheads and dead gum. Mike and Ike and stuff like that. Sweet tarts. Sweet tarts. Smarties, all that kind of. Skittles. Mintos. He's talking about junk. He's talking about little form.

That's the category. Little forms of solidified sugar with different. Y'all got too many brackets going here. There's got to be 64 of them. So we're going to have the- Why, we've got to have 64? Because that's what a bracket is. Are we not doing the four?

I'm going to say like Trisket. Them are going to be like a 15 seed. They're going to pull an upset because the Trisket is cool. And then we're going to have the snack cakes. Then we're going to have chocolate. And then we're going to have candy. So Dots pretzels are going to be up there with the Triscuits and the Cheezits, which is like an eight seed at best.

Boy, that's the one seed taking it all the way home. It's got a good shot. We need to include some potato chips and beef jerky as far as snacks. Beef jerky just threw me out. No, beef jerky's out. What? Yeah, we're at, at brief jerks.

What about it? They're going to have to be a play in. They're going to have to have a 68 team field and have a play in game. But a slim gym could win the whole thing. Slim Jim. If we're throwing Slim Jim in here, then somebody go get a can of Vienna sausage. I mean, like, that's right. You want to talk about the ultimate 16th.

V&L sausage, buddy. V&A sausage is going to get blown out. By who? By everybody. Not by Slim Jim. No, I agree with you. Martin. I mean,

it's just not. No. Slim Jim's not that crazy. You're talking about, slim jim's the lowest part of the totem pole. Hey, you tell him,

Cy. Unless y'all want to buy advertising, then we're going to talk about how much we love it at SlimGim.com slash duck. Got it's a slim. Slem.

Stepping to the duck car, right? I mean, it's a, it's a soft sale, but if you're y'all want it we got slots if i ever sponsored by a company that also sponsored macho man randy savage that's a win that's going on my tombstone yeah yeah they're like like a very small part of how you're going to work you just need to get like a little carving of randy savage in the corner oh

hey you're going to get one you're going worse than now do you go out to wear them weird glasses though them like full those things are sweet oh boy i've been thinking about getting into weird sunglasses well you sell enough of them These new age fishermen like them big walled mirror things. You might as well get you some of them. That's not a bad idea, Martin. See, you could probably sell them to every high school or around here. As long as you get white frames on them.

Sun chips. Them garden salsa slap. That's a three seed at least. Them garden salsa slap. See, it's the problem. Yeah, this is... 64 is going to be tough to narrow this Joker down to. It's really going to be...

The problem is it's going to bring a self-awareness of just how unhealthy we are. Well, that's okay Because we take our vitamins in the morning With one scoop That's right But But I guarantee you We're going to get more than 75

Or something in us after that's all the same time There is a thing about snacks They rule But you got moderation Otherwise you end up like me You know, a year and a half ago Yeah Not a great spot

But if we end up with like one of them one pound back You're at trouble Because you can't quit eating them Right now Peanut Eminemes on the chocolate scale. That's good. That's a solid.

But, I mean, it can't be above a Reese's egg. See? That's a one seed. That's what I'm saying. That's a one seed. What about the marshmallow peeps? They're not even in the top 16. What?

Yeah, didn't make the tournament. Yeah. Like, they're down there in the Mid-American Conference battling for fifth. You're talking about the NIT tournament? What are we talking about? No, they ain't even in the NIT. Like, they're already on the recruiting trail right now. Like, they're calling all the guys.

guys that, never mind. They got recruiting. They got recruiting. They got issues. Yeah, peeps are. Once a year. Peeps equal gar. That's what that is.

It's a gar. Mega gar. I'd rather have a garball than a peep. He's being quiet. Are you into peeps? I mean, I like peeps. But I eat them once a year. I got some out in the truck.

Speaking of once a year. He's just coming up. Candy corn. So let's just before. before we go to break. I agree. Let's break down why Phil can't be a judge. This is not a hot issue.

He brings home leftover hamburger and chicken and dumplings from the middle of nowhere Tennessee. Hold on. I did that twice. I only did that twice. You fly to Miami and eat fried chicken. Because the guy in the bathroom told me it was delicious.

Wait, it was in the bathroom? Yeah, the guy handed me the towel and said try the chicken. You never listened. Oh, it was a bathroom attended. You never listened to anybody in Miami in the bathroom. But if his opinion was valid, they'd have had him at the host stand. All right, ladies and gentlemen, if you hear nothing else from this podcast ever in your life. Don't ever listen to a man in a Miami bathroom.

Yeah. If we give you any advice, take that. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means? That means more outside cooking. And y'all know, we love to eat beef around here. And that's because of our friends over at Triedales,

makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good? It's so good. Our friend, Sal Robertson would say, bye on the grill! Look, before we got Tritels, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store,

do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes from, but with Tritails beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Tritales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch, so they've been at it for a while.

Now look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I'll tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Tritale's beef.

I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat. She ain't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. You're disqualified from being a judge. And you take advice from a man in a Miami bathroom. I did that once.

If the advice was anything other than here's a mint. And when I left? Like, you're out. No, when I left, I went and found him. I must say, hey man, chicken wasn't all that. Did you tip him? Chicken one much. No.

Okay. I got a thing about that weird bathroom attendant thing. I don't like it. No, he's standing there waiting for you, sir, and he's got the hand towel. And you're supposed to tip him. I was just like, hey, what's up? Plant your corn or like. Well, maybe he gets a piece of every fried chicken cell.

Oh, hey, here's their newsflash. Bathroom just reminds me. Oh, no. For those that have not been over to Europe and Germany, Germany specifically, okay, hey, you may go in a men's bathroom in Germany, and there is a woman in there with a tail like he's talking about. Here's the tail. Try the chicken.

That arguably makes me more comfortable than going in there and there's a man. Well, I'm just saying, hey, it happened. It freaked me out the first time it happened. I thought I wasn't in the wrong room. I got something to say about bathrooms after Phil. Okay, no, I wasn't freaked out by this guy until he slid the towel underneath the stall. Then you got a free.

He just making stuff up now. I joke about that. That's Miami for you. I was walking out. But can I say something about bathrooms in America? Because I've been to Germany. Why do our doors not shut all the way? There's like a six-inch crack in some of these things.

Not really. Oh, yeah. You see right in. Can we get some? privacy here? Does that never bother anybody else? I ain't very long enough for that to bother me. Just, yeah, no privacy.

When I was in Germany, they had like a full door. Close it. I was like, oh, this is what I'm talking about. Like at Buckees. Yeah. Bucky's done figuring it out. Close the door. I don't know.

I see. So I want to come up with an out. I'm a home pooper. No, see, I'm not. Oh, yeah, you're driving. I mean, I'm going to attempt to get home. Like, I'm not going to be like, oh, I think I have to poop and go in a public bathroom. If I go in there, the mustache started sweating.

We are in a buy, Jack. So, yeah, okay. Like, so those things never, like, if I'm in there, it's record time because we are threat level midnight. Like, yeah. I mean, I'm walking in with the dude wipes ready to roll. This is, hey, Houston, we have an emergency. Bigging.

Any time side tells me that we need to get to the, the restaurant. when he says, hey, we need to get to the restroom. I just hammer it. I'm driving, like, out of control to the first restroom that we can get to. And I want to come up with an app that you can put in and score all the bathrooms around the United States. I thought they had one of them. No. There's a bathroom rating app?

No. I don't know. Hilt doesn't have a public restroom. But I want to make an app that does that. Well, who's going to score it? Everybody who goes to the bathroom. Because judging by your list of snacks, I'm not following these tips. Oh, come on.

I'm just saying. There you go, boy. I can't get no respect. Where did you get that tip? Oh, Miami bathroom. Yeah, there you go. Okay, quick. Try the fried chicken.

While we're on this app, now that we've created the app, how many stars does the Miami bathroom? Do you give it a four star for the bad advice on the chicken? No, it was five star. It was very nice. There's no not for the chicken advice. Yeah.

Chicken advice, one star. No, you put a five star. and then in the comments you say, but don't trust attendance. Yeah, don't eat the chicken. Like, bathroom was clean. That used to be a big thing, though. You were talking about the score in the bathrooms.

Yeah. And, hey, look, most of the gas stations, Texaco was number one for the cleanest and nicest bathroom. Does Texaco still exist? Yeah. It probably don't, but back in the 60s, okay, hey, that was number one. That's where you stopped to poop. Hey, if you had to use the restroom somewhere, hey, Texaco was.

You could take you bucket in there and get you, get you, Edison done and everything all at one time. That used to be like McDonald's thing. What? Clean bathrooms. They like hung their hat on that. They were like, hey. Now they don't even remember to put a piece of meat in their hamburger.

So like. Did that happen to you recently? It happened to Brittany. Fix the ice cream machine. She got bread and ketchup? She ordered the cheeseburger got home. It had everything but the meat. It had the cheese?

Had the cheese. No patty. No patty. The cheese ice goes on to me. Pattyless. Pattyless. No patty. Hey.

The world we live in today, man, is wild. Hey, look. I'll tell you what it was. They was doing a test. Okay. If it was sales. Yeah, well. She didn't come back for another one.

She didn't go back for another one. It didn't work out. Cy, did y'all used to have to pay a dime to get into the restroom? Do you remember that? No, it was a quarter. Grief. Where? I do.

Back in the day when I was young. Hey, I would go back to that if they would put toilet. paper in there that I couldn't read the newspaper through. Yeah. Hey, that's the worst thing you ever wanted to happen is, hey, you got to do number two. And hey, you're doing your business and, hey, guess what? Let's go where? No paper, no toilet tissue.

Stop by my office. I got something for you that I carry with me everywhere and I order in bulk now. Well, hey, I'm just telling you, you know. They come in individual packets. Mint fresh, you're good to go. Oh, mint fresh. There's a bracket of bad things that could happen and that's a one scene. That's not terrible

Man, it's worse thing You're at least wearing a shirt and you got socks on You can make it out of there Oh yeah Sox It ain't no different than doing it in the wood Hey, I've run a lot of good underwear And

Anyway That's why sigh And a lot of good t-shirts That's why Cy used to wear 15 inch boxer jocks Because he had six inches of toilet paper On the bottom of every one of them Hold on

That's happened a lot That's why I like a belt. Because any time I have my boxers shorts on, hey, somebody hit a belt. He's ready, Martin, he's ready. He's ready. So you've been in, you use the word a lot. You've been in a predicament in a stall with way too much visual confirmation through the wall. And there's been no toilet paper that many times?

Oh, quite frequently. Well, he travels a lot That's why I'm like Martin. Okay, most of the time, no, unless this is an emergency. No, I don't use, I don't use public medicine. I ain't go unless that mustache sweat. And we all know what I'm talking about.

Yeah. That lip gets hot. Quivering. Yep. I'm just the opposite. I mean, I'm going to be in, son. I'm way too regular. I'm not holding it in.

I'm just, it's not an emergency. I can make it. I've never understood that, actually. What? Like, you either got to go or you don't, right? No, no. No, if you, you can't just know. Oh, yeah.

I mean, pretty much any time of the day, if I just went in there, I could, I could let something happen. I mean, I'm not like, I mean. He said, hey, this is under his control. But I'm not, I mean, I'm not in there to read the newspaper or catch up on Facebook or nothing like, hey, I'm in there to get a job done. Yeah. I'm not a.

Here's the thing. I'm not a nester, as you would say. This is one, hey, everything is out of your. control. You're a pretty vulnerable state when you're there with your pants around your ankles taking a dump. I mean, it don't get much more vulnerable as a male than that. Hey, when you've eaten something, okay, because you can't go anywhere.

It's disagreeing with you and saying, hey, let me out. Well, you let them out. No, that's when I start those breathing techniques. That's the only time that's not. I learned that in Lamas class. Now, I've went up on the bank of a mini of Lake. those always seem to be the worst. Yeah.

You just, you don't even worry about stumps or nothing. You just run that sucker up on the bank. Don't handle your business. Well, hey, no, Phil's always saying, hey, it's just better to find you a log. Well, we got to get to the break. Sometimes you just find you dry ground.

Well, no, no, no, what I was saying, hey, you know, sometimes you just go find dry ground. That's all you really after. That's interesting. And if you're in flooded timber, a log is about the only dry ground you got. That's it. That's it, boys.

Hey. which is a man who's six-four and bumping about two seventy-five is quite a balancing act but you can get it done that's it are you talking about me no you ain't six four you gotta be real careful when you're wearing waiters you got to pull you got to pull it yeah you got to be real careful when wearing waiters it's the art to it if you don't you'll be scooping that out that's right in that way okay well that's when you burn the waiters boy yeah you just go back to the blind and everybody's saying hey get out no get no you ain't coming in here Or you could be like old curly and just use a life jacket. That's it.

Hey. Y'all ain't heard that store? I don't want to hear it right now. I do. Take a break and then tell the story? Yeah, let's do that. Now, Drew got stuck in an ice storm, and he was like, I ain't going to make it. I ain't going to make it.

He gets to his apartment. You can't. Oh, who cares. Hey, Drew, sorry. I was telling my friend's a story in the break about the other friend of him. Drew ain't. Nobody we know listens to this thing. Anyway, so Drew's stuck in an ice storm in Dallas, and he's like, I ain't going to make it. I ain't going to make it.

He makes it to his apartment. He gets out. He starts going to the house. Uh-uh. Uh-uh. Slips. Left foot hits the ice. Yeah.

Moves about four inches forward. He catches himself, but he loses all control. That's right. Right there in front of this apartment. That's it, boy. Hey, that's it. Hey. He's the quietest guy.

Imagine my best friend being super quiet. But he has to be. Don't slip when you're in the bind. It is the greatest story he can tell, and I laugh every time he tells it. Don't ever, don't ever slip on ice when you're in a bind. He hit that ice. He said. Need to get to the bathroom.

Yeah. Poor planning. Well, he just, yeah. I mean, he probably had to squat to catch himself too. So, I mean, like, it just. Yeah, you lose it. Shots fired, boy. That's why I don't live where ice is.

One of them assumed the position, and he did, and it was too late. Yeah. Well, I mean, who hadn't. Well, I ain't done it like that. But, I mean, I've done it. Well, golf courses get me every time. My childhood and golf courses, there's been many underwear thrown away there. I wish I could tell you how many times I come back from fishing pantless.

So it's fine. But Mark, there's a story of a life jacket and curly? Oh, yeah, old curly. Curly. Curly, which curly don't? Curly don't. Not curly, curly, curly don't. No, he got to buy.

We have multiple friends named Curly. Have he heard this story? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, he was there. No, no. Side was part of the aftermath. Here's the thing. We got a boat running you.

You put the boat in the blind, okay? And there's a door you get into. All right. And are you all hunting on this day? Oh, yeah. So you load and unload at the door. Okay. So, hey, we pull up in there and guess what's at the door?

A stake? He don't drop the big, you know. A deuce. Hey. Maybe even a deuce and a half. And then we look in the boat. On the door? On the doorway to get in.

to the duck blind. Yeah. Here's a big cotton mouth. It wouldn't know cotton mouth. It wouldn't look like one. I'd rather had a cotton mouth. I'd pick him up and get him out of the way. All right.

He looked like one. Yeah. Anyway, okay, then we look. Mega. Yeah, then we look and there's the, uh, one of our life jacket. Life jacket, and it's got a big smear on the street. Yeah. My man took a dump.

Yeah. In the doorway. I can't hear any more. Yeah. And then. Wipeed his rear end with our life jacket. And left it there for us to find. Yeah, and left it.

Now that's banned for life. He is. He left it there for us to find, didn't tell nobody. And size right, you get in there in the morning, you flashlight hit, yeah. And it's not, a snake is way less scary. Yeah. Because, I mean, this thing, I understand why he had to get it out,

because if not, he was going to be sick. Oh, no. I mean, I get it. But hey, hey, just hanging out the door. and let it drop in the water. Or if you have to do it on the floor, at least take a stick and throw it in the water. Treat it like a dog.

He was proud of it, apparently. Curly is proud of a lot of things that he shouldn't necessarily be proud of. That's the problem. Burn the life jacket. Just carry it home with you. Wash it off. Do something.

Bring it back. No, don't bring it back. But if it's washed off. Look, let me tell you something. You don't get to name Curly Dawn by making decisions better than that. So I'm just saying it fit. We do need to go down a road here because one of us has

been banned for life from down there. And it was for way less than that. So has Curley ever been back? Not that I'm aware of. Oh, okay. That sounds like a ban. I was just, I was about to stick up for you, Phil. Okay, thanks. If he wasn't banned for life. That's the first time today, by the way.

This is a fun one. I'm just saying. You talk about snacks and troublesome dumps, and I'm in. There's something that you just don't do. That's one of them. Yeah, that's a DED. That's a don't ever do. Don't ever do.

Don't go take a crap in a man's duck blind or deer stand, wipe it with her life jacket or seat, boat cushion, anything, and leave it. And leave no evidence. I've got some advice also. Me and Sall made a rule a long time ago of a courtesy roll. You're driving down the road with you, buddy. You roll the window down when you need to, roll it right back up. No questions.

Don't even talk about it. Oh, it's way funny. Is that right, is that? Yeah. Oh, that's not a fun role. That's a courtesy role. No, that's what you do with your buddies. That's right.

Your wife, you lock the windows. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry, baby. I can't get in. He's expecting it's one. You reach over and hit child lock. Hey, yeah, especially if it's one of solid but deadly. The one where she goes like this.

The problem is when she fights back. That's that. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm not going out of this conversation. No, no, no, no. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Nope, nope. Nope, let it go. You know, Allison ain't listening. This must be a family thing. Oh, it's just, no, this is nothing better than ripping one in the car going down the road and waiting for the reaction. No, you can't do that with your buddies. Oh, yeah, you can. You just sit there and you go, no, buddy.

It wasn't me. Seven. Six. Six. Six. No, buddies, I don't do that, but buddies. Buddies, they get the window down before you exit. You exit, give it about a 10 count and put it back up.

I like it. Your wife, you hit the child. Hey, no, no, this is the funniest thing. Because it's the equivalent of pulling a sheet over her head at night. Look, we're in one of it. Get you some of that. We're in one of them black limousines in New York City. Uh-oh.

He's big time, y'all. I was there. Miami bathrooms, New York limousines. Charming bathrooms. The whole family. Okay, and Jessica. Uh-oh. Bus one.

Okay. Okay. Look. Hey, hold on now. I can see the title now. Which Roberts and wife cut win. Yes. Hold on, look.

Hey, get the mic. The guy slammed on the brakes. The driver and says, hey, I will stop and throw all of you out if whoever did that does that again. Because it was violent. And it was. Oh, hey, guess what we pulled up to Fox and Friends? She let it busts again. sweet jessica yeah do you know why

she eats sonic chili cheese tauts like three times a day like that's legit hey she's gonna be mad at you you can't eat that much pre-made chili and not have bowel disruption is this like a fun family joke or is she embarrassed by this oh no no hey it was the greatest we all got high-fives when we got out Also, there's a significantly higher chance of Allison listening to this than Jessica. She'll never know.

As long as Hunter don't tag her in the post, we'll be fine. Don't do it. That was priceless, okay? That's funny. So I said they don't got kicked out of a New York limousine because Jessica doesn't cut win. Well, when you started on that story, my head was rolling. To Jep? Who was it?

Yeah, I went to Jep. It could have been a lot of people. Well, because Jep's got nervous bowel if there ever was. Jessica would probably been my last guess. But she was laughing. Not last. I needed to know the list. She thought it was funny.

She was laughing when she did it the first time. Hold on. She was laughing. No. Not the driver. I will pull up. No. Yeah, the driver did not like it at all.

That was funny. I mean, you know, what was funny is when we got right, and I think she was sitting right next to him. And she wasn't done one of these. leaned over Raised up off of us I've heard a lot of being kicked out of things

stories from all of us in our time but being kicked out of a limousine for bad gas might top the list Yeah I can never say that's even been threatened on me I'm proud to know her Yeah

That was methane methane gas big time voice That's that mustard gas That's that chili cheese gas I guarantee you. I bet you on the way to the airport, she stopped at Sonic. I'm just telling you right now.

It's a great little food joint. That's funny. Unbelievable. Oh, man. Pooping your pants, having gas and eating snacks. Well, at some point you knew

we were going to degrade down to just a guy podcast. That's just what it is. Hey, whatever, Jessica's the biggest farter over us all. No comment. No comment. Other than let's take a break. We'll be back right after this.

Well, to get back on the podcast that we're familiar with. I don't really even know. So the fish are biting. Oh, boy. Where do you go from there? How did we even get there? Martin was making a list.

Bad food stories. Why I couldn't be on a judge. Yeah, then we ended up there. We ended up that bathroom attended in Miami, sent us all the way down here. I got a cousin that lives in Atlanta, and he was asking me, they're about to do a podcast. It should be a pretty big one, I think.

but he was asking me I think he's gonna be like the producer he's like what so y'all got like he's been watching ours like so the plan going in is what I go sit down yeah he goes them what I say and then see what what I say and then see what I say

and then we kind of roll we get about three minutes before the cameras come on we look at each other talk to each other kind of get a feel for it and then there we go we're already telling stories before the cameras at the beginning I used to try and have like an outline to keep us on And then I figured out, you know what?

Yeah, no. He's the outline breaker. So why even try? But if I put him on an outline, he's not going to be him. So like there's no, no, just let him freaking go. You know what I've noticed? The best moments on this podcast, Erwin Ciz says, oh, that reminds me. And that's whenever I get excited.

My whole life has been that way. I'm way more interested in more black limousine stories. That's all I got to say. I wrote two books, okay, and they're about my childhood. You can get them on Duck Commander.com or available in the store. Slash duck. That might not be true. Sy gets a royalty soon.

Improv. You are improv. You're improv and proper. It's always good. Imprope is always good. I don't disagree with that. I would love to see Si on whose line is it anyway. Is that still a show?

No, no. Willi was on it? Was it? Yeah. I never watched. man, which was part of my drawing. Oh, no. There, it is amazing what they can come up with.

Yeah. Yeah. Sir, it's amazing what you come up with. Well, no, no. Oh, no, because I, especially when they get in the singing part. Yeah. Well, you're a singer. When the girl, the piano player, a woman and a guitar,

when they start hitting it and then the here they go. Who knew, Sa was such a whose line is it anyway thing? Oh, no, no. I'll watch it all the time and on the floor. How much TV do you watch? Especially only being awake like six hours a day. That's what I'm like I'm going through. And one of the hours is here.

And two of the hours are on weather. Yeah, but I've got to do something when I'm awake. I think he leaves it on and sleeps and he just gets all this by osmosis. Like it just gets in there. What if Si's really awake while he sleeps? Well, he said he sleep with his eyes open. No, no, I don't sleep really. How do I word this?

Uh-oh. I don't have a. I guess restful sleep. He doesn't hit that REM sleep. He ain't in that REM cycle. Yeah, I don't, you know, I wake up all the time during the night and in early morning, especially early morning.

I'm aware, I've stayed with you. Yeah, that's why I tell people all the time, y'all say God has not got a big, good sense of humor, wrong answer. Wrong answer. Because, hey. He crack you up all the time. Oh, no, no.

hey, we have some of the most amazing minutes together, okay, because he'll wake me up during the night and put something in my head, okay, that I have never thought of before in my life. Do you keep it in? Well, no, I usually share it with everybody. He can't keep nothing again. I can't help keep it in. Is anybody ever told you a secret?

No. Are they telling him what, not to say? say and that's the first thing he says yeah if you ever say okay and if you want to duck dynes you know this don't ever say hey don't do this you know because hey guess what that's going to happen yeah you and feel are that way like oh yeah i remember used to have him a little breeze before we do things like hey now don't mention this don't that is the that's what they led with yeah like okay that's just not even put the seed in their mind yeah it's not even hey i kept telling them hey don't do that you idiot idiots you know and here we're

Because you've just stuck it in my brain pan and guess what? It's going to work its way out. What's a brain pan? A brain pan? It's like an oil pan, but it's got brain. And it's got less oil in it. Yeah. Yeah.

And it may be a little low. Yeah. It's got a little sludge. Yeah, a little sludge. At some events, they'll have some cards and questions that they want to ask that. And I'll look through them before they do it. And I'll start taking out about four or five of them. They're like, what do you?

I said, don't even talk about it. Just take those. Don't ever mention this in front of the side. No, no, because in Michigan, the preacher, when we was up there doing our thing together, Sunday morning, he asked me a question, and I would give him some kind of answer. And then he said, wait a minute, you're running, you're chasing a rabbit on me. He said, I want you to answer this question.

And I said, well, buddy, I'm trying to answer the question. I'm trying to get there. Yeah, I said, I'm trying to get there, but I don't know really what you're looking for. That was on stage? Yeah, no, no, yeah. He said, I quit chasing rabbits? No, no, because he was asked me, and he said, why not hold it?

You got it, you know, and so he asked you again. And then I finally said, okay, I said, now I think I know where you're going with this. Because he had asked me, he said, well, when did you, when did, why did it take you so long to come back to Jesus? Yeah, and I said, well, because I was afraid he wouldn't accept. me because I'm not good enough. Yeah. That's why it took me so long to finally break down and say, you know, I need help. And he finally, then he hushed.

Yeah. And I said, evidently, I finally got the answer you wanted. You were looking for. Yeah. Yeah. And he said, you did. That is a male Robertson trait, if I ever heard. Yeah.

Because I remember asking Phil, like we did that 50th anniversary video, and I was doing the interview question more. I'm like, Phil, what does 50 years mean to you? Well, 2,000 years ago, there was a man named Jesus. From Mazareth. And I'm like, Phil, Phil, we're going to share the gospel. Like, no, no, but can we get this what happened in 1972 first? Yeah, yeah, I'm asking about your company.

You know we're going to share the gospel in this thing. I was going to get there. But can we answer what happened in 1972 first? Then we started 50 years and we'll work our way to 2,022 years ago. It all starts 2,000 years ago, Martin. But they're all the same way. Willie's same way when you sit down and interview him. He got better about it.

He finally was just like, just tell me what you want me to say. And I was like, okay, praise God. Like, this is, okay. Hey, guys, this is Willie Robertson? Yeah. No, no, because it took this guy, this is about 45 minutes. He kept asking the same question. Mm-hmm.

And I said, evidently, I'm not giving you what you won't. And I said, I'm not sure where you. And you was just like that old beagle. Barron? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

He's an excellent hunter. You're going to. There he went. Oh, hey. Oh, I got him now, though. Oh, man. Well, let's take a lot of the break and we'll get back and we'll get in that email bag right after this. Email bag right after this.

That's right. Hello at Duckcallroom.com. That's the email address. We appreciate all you. Send in your snacks. We're going to do this bracket in the spirit of March Magnus. We are doing the bracket. I know we're a weekend behind, but maybe we should do 32.

because that's what, nah, let's do 64, just in case people want to send in a lot of snacks. What is we the people doing? We the people are sending us snacks.

Well, hey, you can also just send suggestions. Suggestions if we can buy them, but again, local snack. I'm going to make the bracket, I think. Yeah.

Does that sound like a good idea? Send the suggestion and your probable seed number. That way we can take that into a cowlid consideration. No, no, that's a two seed.

You make it the bracket? of my man. Who's the committee here, man? Two seed. He's the chairman. I'll split. I will be fair and unbiased. That's going to be hard to.

Or I'll try to. Anyway, Sam from a student at UNC Charlotte. Mm-hmm. Is that like ULM? Yeah. Is that? Yeah, UNC Charlotte ain't a good one. Like for basketball.

Easy, man. Like that's not the UNC you're thinking about. Okay. I'm just learning. But I'm guessing it's in Charlotte, North Carolina. He's planning a worship event. That's awesome, man. He's going to share a message afterwards.

Okay. That's awesome, man. Do you have any advice for someone who it's their first time preaching? Keep it short. Land the plane. Keep it short. No offense, I? Rabbit, I'm just kidding.

No, I was looking at the title of that. Preaching message advice. Remember that the power lies in the message, not the messenger. That's right, not the messenger. So keep your message short, concise, to the point, and you're doing a worship event. Let the worship be the focus of the event. And also you can look at 1st Corinthians 15.

That helps you to remind people about the good news about Jesus and the kingdom of God. what was the one at the church he always said hey if you ain't struck all by about 15 minutes was that bill smear? I think it was no it was another was one or another elder Carl Carl Carl Carl Drew's grandpa from the dump store earlier. Hey he was saying hey if you ain't struck all about 15 minutes you know hey it's a dry hole yeah don't keep digging don't get don't keep drilling yeah and don't say uh 50 million times careful now

What? You're getting to meddling now. Somebody you know, does right, yeah, but you're getting in the meddling now. You ain't preaching. They're talking about me. No, no, no, no, no, no. Anyways, my advice. The person I'm referred to is not here.

My advice for any public speaking is you're going to be nervous. You don't have to say that. Use it. Every time I see, yeah, use it. But every time I see somebody. get up and like, oh, this is my first time I'm so nervous, guys. That makes you more nervous. Yeah.

Just get up there with fake confidence, and it will turn into real confidence. And I would say don't look everybody in the eye when you're up in front of however many people. You look at the crowd. Yep. You know. And you actually look through them. Yeah. And you don't focus on anybody because sometimes if you look at somebody, you get long.

Half time, I can't see nothing anyway. They got them light shining on you. You can see about two rows of people and everybody else goes, just a lot of people. blur. And I got one other trick that I do at church. You pick one person. And that's, if you got to focus on somebody and you feel like you got to talk to somebody, just pick the nicest face you see and focus on them. And you'll be looking at the crowd, but you're really just looking at that guy. Pick Wayne McDaniel. My dude's name is Jim McWilliam. There you go. Jimmy Mac. Have I ever do anything at our church? I'm like, Jim, you're going to be there? And one time he wasn't.

And I got way, because I was like, always. He freaked out. He wasn't there. Jim, I got a Jimmy Mac. I got a look at you, man. That's funny. Jim's awesome, dude. Well, there you go. But yeah. Best part is, hey, thank it till you make it.

And the shorter, you get, really good speakers can do it quick. Yeah. I've never heard somebody say, man, that message is too short. But I, I've heard plenty of the other. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you, I expect you, you know, the longer you go, you start to repeat yourself. No, and that's always a bad thing.

There you go. Repeating. Kind of like we're doing right now. What's the next one? Kind of like we're doing right now. What's the next one? How heavy we want to go? It don't matter.

We got about four minutes, four or five minutes. Super heavy? Medium heavy or super heavy? Yeah, Sight looks like he's in a philosophical mood. Go with heavy. Bring it. Bring it. We've got the counselor here, so let's go super heavy.

Yeah, there you go. And he's a professional. That's what I'm in. Will from Castell. Steeleon, Springs, Tennessee, night shift, worker loves listening, makes the nights go by quicker. People actually look at him funny a lot because he starts laughing. People look at me funny all the time, not for that reason, so we're in the same boat. Anyway, life has hit a low point.

Five years married, she's decided she's out. He says it's because he doesn't communicate with her good enough and she's sick of it. but he's tried to convince marriage counseling and she's out on that too she just says I'm done she's tired and then he says would love to hear from us that's tough man and I hate that

amen it's not fun but to be fair marriage is hard like it's difficult it is not all sunshine and rainbows the good times are but then bad times get in there And that's a, Brittany gets on me all the time for not communicating,

but I'm just not a very effective communicate. Because like the problem is she thinks stuff should bother me and stuff doesn't. And I'm like, that doesn't even like get on my radar. It's just one them deal. I guess it's a difference between a male and a female maybe. Oh, yeah. But, you know,

we have done counseling and we will continue to do counseling from time to time to keep everything fresh. And I don't know, maybe she begged you for count i don't i don't know the whole story here in five years of time it just seems weird that she would say no to counseling that that i find that puzzling yeah there's there's a lot that we don't know but what we tend to do is we create a um constructed reality about what we think marriage is and a lot of times it's not like that for for the man and the woman she seems to have gone in a direction where you know she's she's kind of saying it's over and she's not willing to do anything

so you're limited now where you have to do some self-preservation what what uh how long did it say they was five five years five years married you know you know i'm thinking of you only right now because like philip said she's she's to the point that she said hey i i'm done Okay, so this is for you. That's clear communication too. Yeah, okay. I'm done.

Yeah, y'all. This is for you. Don't, let her problem become yours. Okay. I wish you, you know, I hope you can talk her into trying to work it out. But if you can't, and like I said, she's already made up her mind, it seems like that she's done with it. So, hey, this is to protect you, okay, from further relationships. Okay.

Don't let this one bad thing, you know, ruin you for the rest of your life. She's got a problem, especially if she don't want to work it, try to work it out with you, that it's just what I'm feeling. She's the one with the problem. Yep. Okay. So like I said, if you can't convince her, hey, let's go to someone and let a third person get involved with us on this and see if we can't work this out. But if she don't want to go that route, then hey, don't let all the blame come on to you.

Yeah. Yeah. And guilt and everything else. Yeah. You know, I mean, it's time to rebuild. And if you, I would say, like Cy, I hope it was. works out. I want it to. And I would pray for your marriage to make it. But if it doesn't, and you know it's not going to make it, then in the best way possible, you try to rebuild

your life and your relationships and be supported by, you know, your family and friends that you have and also some spiritual change, you know. Don't be afraid of independent counseling either. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Just because she won't go. Doesn't mean that you can. You might need to go and then she may follow. Yeah. You might need to be the leader there and say, look, I've realized I've screwed up because you've screwed up somehow, some way for it to be over. Yeah, but there's two involved.

And there's definitely two involved. Yeah. There's both sides of this story and the truth's somewhere in the middle. But you've screwed up, she's screwed up. So if you take that first step and say, look, I know you don't want to do this, but I've got to work on me because clearly I've messed up some things. I'm going. That's probably your first step.

Yeah. Yeah, I would start there. I mean, if that's where, if she's not willing to go, then maybe she needs to just see that you are willing to go rather than the words. Maybe you need to go. And it may not change anything, but I can tell you, you're not going to be mad that you went and talked to somebody. You're not going to be like, dang, I wish I hadn't done that.

So I. Well, it's always good like they're telling you right now, these guys, okay, you've messed up, okay? Get with a counselor, okay, and find out where you messed up, where, hey, you don't repreat the process with another. Yeah, don't start a cycle. Yeah, don't break the cycle. That's good.

You know, don't stay in the rut. Get out of the rut, you know. But, man, it's weird. I hate to hear that. Yeah. Man, for any of y'all listening. We pray that, hey, you can convince her to go to counseling with you, and you can actually work it out and save your marriage,

okay because you're talking about your partnership here between two people amen okay but to those listening that may be thinking about getting married or engaged or anything like it you hear it all the time I'm just here to tell you it is tough marriage is like a garden it gets better okay we're in a way better spot now at where are we eight years about to be eight years then we were at year two I can tell you right now you have to work hey you have to work at it It should like a garden. Weeds pop up and hey, look, if you don't pull the weed, your garden will be very good.

And I would also say I'll be married 31 years coming up here in a couple weeks. But I'll say, remember, if you're thinking about getting married, it's a contract between you and your spouse and God Almighty. So let God help you through any situation that you're going through. And as me and my wife are growing closer to God, we get closer to each other. So that's always been paramount in our relationship. Yeah. 100%.

I think that was great advice all the way around. Well, I got a Bible verse for you too, man. We're going to be praying for you, Will. But James 112 says, Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial. Because having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love them. you're going through a trial.

You don't have to keep going through it. There is another side to it. We don't know what that looks like, but we'll be praying for the best outcome. And that's it. We'll see you next time right here with snacks. With snacks. With snacks.

Oh, man, I love snacks. I got a one seed in mine right now. He got a one seed, boy. You ain't got no one seed. What is it? Say it. So he's recording. No, I'm fixing to go eat me some snack.