Duck Call Room - Uncle Si Plans His Competitive Eating Career

Episode Date: June 29, 2023

Uncle Si’s tall tale about his appetite leads the boys to explore the realm of competitive eating. John-David and Martin recall their own eating contest and how it ruined them on that food forever. Phillip has been thinking deeply about a Bible story from the book of Luke, and wants the boys’ opinion on it. Uncle Si gets fired up talking about the Lord and the importance of Christian community. Martin and John-David have some strong advice for a fan who’s wasting time on his honeymoon sending them emails! The boys reminisce about their first wedding anniversaries and the gifts they gave to their wives. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back. Hi, we're here. Welcome back. I got a crazy question. Phil showed up looking good in the purple. Look at him, son. Tigers win. My favorite.

Better believe it. Pernherple. And it's got the right word on it. What? I can't even see. Oh, I couldn't see that. We're sitting in a straight life. That's what Jason is always saying, okay.

Hey, I can't wait to get them because we're going to have fish rise up there. Fish, pride. That's right. That's right. Jesus ate fish, be like Jesus. So this sign means Jesus Christ, Son of God, and the Greek. So, and then that's why they call it the Jesus sign.

Okay. I feel better studying, man. Phil's the heat, bro. I like it. Phil took us not winning an award to heart. He said, oh, we about change that. We're going to get that clothes. He said, one out of every three, I'm going to bring this thing back.

We're getting it. We were just entertaining and telling weird stories and sprinkling in Jesus. We're about to smack y'all in the face here in a minute. And look, y'all can't see it right now, but we have a live-in-studio audience. Our producer, Hunter, you've only seen once when we roasted him, we will continue to roast him. Because it's fun. His family is in all the way from Pennsylvania. There's like 14 of them over there.

And they all came in one Jeep. It's wild. No way. And somebody just got a driver's license. Hunter's whole family is actually clowns from a circus. They all drove in one car. There's 15 of them. They're all laughing because it's not 14 of them.

I mean, how else can you get in a vehicle? I know, I know y'all are thinking, man, somebody's just got their driver's license. We should be like a sweet 16. No, he's 60. So that's really cool. He's joined today's society and that's really cool. It's Amish country up there.

I know. You just get confused sometimes. He's just old school. Okay. That's finally. Coming into the 20th century. We got Hunter over there, cringing. He's over there, like, giving it this number.

Oh, man. You messed up, Hunter. You don't bring your family to work. You don't messed up now, Hunter. I know it's a family business. Don't bring them to work. That's just. If you ain't got thick skin, don't show up here.

Are we going to tell all of our Hunter stories now? I have a couple. I just told both of them. Oh. I recently started following Hunter on Instagram, and that's a trip. No, we're talking trash. Look, Hunter did last night before we record. Said, I'm stopping by Buckees.

Do y'all want to snout? I didn't see it until too late. I was sad about that. Well, and it was too late in the day. I couldn't say. He didn't ask me. He didn't tell me I told him, hey, Bourbon-Picky con. That's because you got a phone that cusses you out or whatever.

No, no. No cell phone. You don't want to call me. Every word in the book. I sent him a text and said, bring it all, all of it. That is true. And I was satisfied with that answer. that covers everything.

Also, what did you bring? He brought beef jerky and plain pecans. Why have I not? Hey, since Martin's already ate from a piece jerks. I haven't seen any of them. Pecons are gone too. I ate them all. Oh, okay.

No, they ain't all gone. They're still beef jerky there too. I thought if we said they're all gone, they're not going to be looking for them after the show. You're going to take them anyway. You take all leftovers, so it doesn't matter. I did that one time with an event we went to. You do it every time somebody sends food in here. You're like, oh, I can have this for Valentine's Day or an Easter basket.

It's not true. You're very well compensated in your job, but you're extremely frugal. He didn't bring back any brisket. Yeah, because he ate it all. Sa, take up for me. You ate all the brisket? All the edible brisket. I said it was edible.

Okay. He said it was edible, and I counted 72 bones in the tray. I did eat a whole rack of ribs that my dad cooked the other night. Did you? I ate six of them, and I was like, man, I'm full. Then I looked down and I was like, I mean, this feels like a challenge at this point. Like I should get a free t-shirt if I finished the whole rack. So I did.

He said, you just got a really good nap. He said, I just got to go back in and see if they were really as good as I thought they was when I ate the first six. Yeah. Don't let Big Dave on that green egg on our. That is cooking season. We like right here during the middle of summer. So like there's all kinds of charcoal firing up. And you, yeah, not that we have any trouble talking about food.

but this is the time of year where we celebrate food. Well, I enjoy going out on my porch and saying, okay. I was about to say, you ain't cooking. But it ain't you? You go out on your porch on the north wind, though. You got a whole different feeling. Oh, yeah, yeah. There's a paper mill.

Paper mill. Paper mill. And they're running double shifts tonight, boys. It's rough. Got an odor. Side's only form of cooking is telling Christine to call Jay and tell him what he wants to eat. No, do you just call him and ask him, hey, what are you cooking? No, Stone calls me and said, hey, look, I got big beef tenderloin on the smoker.

Yeah. I said, what time do you want me there? Okay, listen, here's what happened. I was over size. We were doing something. Stone calls. I answer the Si's home phone because he said, Si, I don't have a cell phone. I'm like, hello, Macmillan, where's Sy?

I said, he's sitting right here. Tell him to come eat tenderloins. Be ready at 6 o'clock. I said, Sa, you want to eat? and Lawrence of 6th? Yep. I was like, okay, he said he's in. B'am.

Did you get invited? No invite. Oh, I got weeded out. Weed it out. Yeah, I felt that before. Weed it out. If you're close to the Robertson family, you're going to get weeded out at some point.

Of a lot of things. Fish fries, dove cook. They have big cooking of the dubs, quail. Yeah, there's something we keep to ourselves. Yeah. That first batch of green winged teal, don't nobody get that fun.

Yeah, you don't want to let that out. Yeah. Because when that happened, I went back in there and I said, hey, where's the reps? He said, you're a pig. It was 60. I cooked 60. And I said, there's none left. And he said, no.

You ate 60? No, no. No, we. No, we. We. I mean, you have been known to crash like 42 donuts. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

And I've seen the man eat like eight hamburgers at one thing. That's not even a joke. There's nothing. Six rack of ribs. There's nothing. I could eat hamburgers while I used to. When I was working with my father at the, where we was working, he's a pipe fitter. And Mama cooked me hamburgers.

Yeah. Do you think that? With all the trimmons in there and I'd put them together, they'd be cold. They were delicious. This podcast is about to blow up. Do you think that there is the senior division for competitive eating, like on the 4th of July? Like, could we send size? up there?

No. As like the 70 and older. Well, the problem is it's got to be like one of like four things that Si really likes. Yeah. Like he's going to have to make the competition. Fields, hamburgers, yeah.

Kay's, Swiss steak. Yep. And smothered in tomato sauce. Or like an egg custard pie or something like that. Oh. Oh, we forgot that. Like egg custard pie eating contest. I could eat four of a egg custard pie right now.

See, that's what I'm saying. But I ain't going to just go get on a hot dog eating contest. I don't. I'm on Major League Eating.com right now. I don't eat four of them, but I could eat four for pies. I don't think there's a senior division. It's a free-for-all. At one setting.

We had that deal here at Duck Commander that time, like, fan day on July 4th where we had the hot dog eating contest, and I always thought I could smash. Winner. But after like 10 of them, I was like, no, bro. This is no fun. Did you let Johnny D. beat you? I didn't let him.

him he won fair and square. Oh, no. How many did you eat? Like one more bite than Martin. Yeah. Then I almost died. I trashed the end of them and looked around and said, man, this ain't worth it. I don't remember if I did or not.

No, he come at the end with like the pies and stuff, like strawberry pies and all that kind of stuff. Hold on. How fast did you eat the eight hamburgers? We ate them at lunch one day. When he ate the eight of them. That's why we ate them at lunch. Because the record is 11 and a quarter hamburgers in 10 minutes. Yeah, but hey, that may be a familiar, you know, like McDonald's hamburger, not much on them.

These one that I ate was everything. Grandma's hamburgers. Do you think you could eat 11 and a half hamburgers in 10 minutes? I'll tell you right now, about seven, eight years ago. I watched him eat eight of them like it wasn't nobody. Phil just kept making burgers. And so I just kept going back to the skillet. Oh, no.

Somebody ate 8.3 pounds of vinyana sausage in 10 minutes. No, that would be easy. You just slide on down. That's gross. It was a lady. If you leave that, oh, yeah. She weighs 105 pats. Oh, no way.

You leave that jelly on them, son. They come pre-lubricated. I'm out. That's gross. You ain't even got to chase it with lemonade like Joey Chestnut, do. It comes pre-ready. I'm disgusting. Now, if you outside at that deal,

that gel sitting in that sun a little bit, get a little crusty on it. Yeah. You got it. I'll be like cool hand, Luke. I can eat 50 boiled eggs. She ate 8 pounds. How many cans is that?

I don't know. How much? Eight pounds of vienna sauce. Those things don't weigh a lot, yeah. There's probably at least six pounds of salt involved in that time you get done with it. And then that jelly has to weigh something. Ooh, baby. You imagine next thing.

That would be a pile of them. No, I can. Yeah, it would be a pile of them. Eight of them because they ain't but what. It's about. No, I know. There's about eight. The fact that dude wives doesn't sponsor the National Hot Dog Union contest is trapped.

There's about eight of them. Yeah. I feel just weak in alipenia. Alapeno, yeah. That man ate 29 Waffle House Waffles in 10 minutes. I'm on a website I do not need to be. I couldn't even do that at 2 a.m. when I used to stop there. Anyway, let's take good waffles.

Let's take a break. We'll be right. Yeah, they do. But I mean, after two. And BLT, Cy. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means.

That means more outside cooking. And y'all know, we love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Tritels beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good? It's so good. Our friend, Cy Robertson would say, buy on the grill. Look, before we got Tritels, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left,

case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes from. But with Tritails beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Triedales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch. So they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way.

Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire. That's all you need. Because I'll tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Triedails beef.

I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat. She isn't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. Yeah, I got no. We done got on competitive eating now. We need Godwin to come eat.

No, I just. Rocking Mountain climbing, I win. I just need to know, like, so we went through size four foods that it would be. Giant D. If you pick one. Pizza, son. Pizza and french fries and I will, I mean, I'm not going to win the record because I just saw it. It makes me uncomfortable to think about.

But, like, I would make it out of my division. I'd at least go to regionals. What's pizza? You said, or did you see French fries? I saw pizza. That doesn't seem that bad. How much? No, that's New York pizza.

Hold on. A 16-inch pizza, the man ate 47 slices in 10 minutes. No way. 47. Oh, I could beat that if I could get it. I'm serious. I could beat that if I could get it from the restaurant, Germany. Where you can roll it up?

Because, hey, I had, I bought every time I went there, I bought three, four, four, 14 inch pizzas that I rolled up like a burrito and just, hey, they wouldn't be there. I wouldn't be there five minutes. But you don't want to eat them that fast. Yeah, but hey, if it would be that one, I could eat, I could eat, I could beat the 47th. I don't know. I mean, I could get, I could, no, I couldn't. Oh, I could beat the 47 slice.

French fries is 4.46 pounds in six minutes. Good Lord. I don't know. I could, I mean. I said a pound and a quarter of a minute. I think I could at least. I don't know that I could beat him, but I could at least make him get to four and a half pounds

because he'd be afraid I was going to. I'd make him eat faster. Also, his name is Cookie that won that, so I don't think I have a chance. Oh, they call him Big Cookie. Cookie Jarvis. He 39 weighs 419 pounds. I wonder why.

And he holds the record for chicken wings, French fries, ice cream, chicken fried steak, and of course grapes. because who doesn't love a healthy snack every now and again. Is there a picture of him? And his name's cookie, and he ain't ever ate a cookie. That's fantastic. Yeah, they ain't cookies.

So, Phil, what's yours? I would have to go with grits. Ugh. Grit? I said it. Give me about 20 pounds of grits. Yeah. I think grits.

Oh, what a gut bomb. It's hilarious. That's like just eating brick mortar. Like, at what point, like. That's like taking a bowl of concrete. All right, I got it. I got the record. You're going to look like Jackson standing on his little onesie thing,

just pulling, squeezing the next day. Gosh, everybody. So in 10 minutes, you think you could eat 20 pounds of grits? No. I don't know. Because the record's 21 pounds. Oh, my. 21 pounds of grits.

You know what they make grits out of? That's like two babies. Corn. That's disgusting. Grits is not that. But first, I'm going to say it out loud. Grits, totally overrated. Oh, we love that good.

Is there anything about corn in there? Corn on the cob? Yeah, corn on the cob. I got fresh ones if you want them. Huh? You want some fresh one? There you go. Our sweet corn is ready.

61 and three-quarter ears of sweet corn in 12 minutes. Yeah, I can't even pick 61 ears in 12 minutes. And the guy only weighs 165 pounds. Of course he does. That's on the cob. Yeah, it says. He's like a beaver. Yeah.

I think he's more Unbelievable Bounds or 61 Codys 1.67 61.75 ears of corn Is there one for cheese sticks? I'm a big fan.

The problem with cheese sticks is you will die if you eat that many cheese sticks. Oh yeah, you'll eat that meaning. You will forever be clogged. I had a buddy about it. There will be nothing out and nothing in for the rest of your short life. Look, we had a big guy. Yeah, you would probably self-destruck.

Yeah. Hey, we had a big guy who played fullback on a football team. Yep. He ate pork ribs, the little baby ribs. Yeah, baby backs. He'd just put him in his mouth and just spit the bones out, like a, just give him next rack. I mean, I like to think, like, Brescott would be a pretty cool one, but then that'd probably ruin Brescott. Yeah.

I haven't ate a hot dog since. that day, we did that. Yeah. I look at them and I'm like, hey, look at him. I don't know. No, that's bad. 61.

Well, brisket only, uh-oh. Yeah, brisket's only in sandwiches in the record books. There is a therapeutic, if you will, it's a therapeutic thing that we use called implosion. Like if kids are being caught smoking, you can put them in a closed room and have them smoke, you know, a carton of it,

not that we do this, but a carton of cigarettes and they would be so sick of it, They'd throw up every time. Oh, no, no. I've done that to my son and daughter. Okay, there's a technique called implosion. So if I ever ate 20 pounds of grits, I'd never eat them again. You know what I mean?

I'd be so sick, I'd be like, no. So that's why I wouldn't do it. It's actually dangerous. What if you ate 23 and a half pounds of salmon chowder in six minutes? I'd never eat it again. I wouldn't eat salmon chowder just for fun. Like, that sounds gross. Who must I make a fish soup?

Exactly. I mean, it doesn't sound bad. Where's fried crappie at on the door? A hundred and twenty-one twinkies? How long? I haven't eaten 121 twinkies in my life. That's a good thing.

I ate a box with them every once in a house. Yeah. I can eat a box with them about, you know, every other week as though. For real, real talk. They ain't got Christmas tree cakes on there,

do they? Because, you boy smash. Okay. But I wouldn't because I don't want to lose that joy in my life. That's right. You don't want to ruin it. That's right.

Don't give it up. You don't want to eat. They're like oatmeal cream pies. That's kind of cool, too. Oh, that's a good one. Little Debbie could probably make a killing in the Little Debbie competitive eating circuit. Fresh baked. Little Debbie wouldn't be so little.

Raising. None of us are. No. Raisin oatmeal cookies. Fresh baked. Oh, yeah. No, I've seen something. I can't see.

I can eat a whole plate. There's a category and it's all been food. And this category says one word and it's butter. No. Oh. No. Somebody didn't sit there and springing butter, did this? Straight up butter.

Salted butter at that. You better not. Seven quarter pound sticks. Rough math tells me one and three quarter pounds of butter in five minutes. Oh, my sweet. Don is 50s. Don, you're, you're told to be doing that anymore. I bet he did design the SpaceX rocket propulsion.

This dude owns, yeah, well, this makes him. He's going to be very aware of how that works. This dude owns the record for butter and bologna, so that makes a lot of sense. He gets stopped in TSA because of the, there's a bomb forming in his stomach at all times. Also known as. He's ready to bo-yoom. His nickname is slick.

Oh. How did he not win the vina sausage one, man? You know he owns a bidet. That's all I'm saying. Actually, doesn't even need one. No, he better have a fire hose. No. Staying back 30 feet.

If you eat three pounds of butter and a bunch and two and a three pounds of bologna, both in under six minutes, you don't even probably have to wipe. It's like taking a shower. A pound and three quarters of just oil. Just straight oil. Yeah. Just. Yeah.

This was fun when we started. Yeah. Yeah. You know what we should do now? Slam off the charts. Read it back in. We should probably have a very serious discussion on Luke chapter five. We've laughed.

We've laughed until we've cried. But Phil came in today wanting to have an extremely serious discussion. So we'll do that right when we get back from the break. Oh, my. Goodness. But it feels like are we about to go full unashamed here? No, because we can't win a Clove Award. Ah, we ain't win a no Clove Award.

We could win the K-Love. But are you about to take us down a biblical journey? Well, this is the thing, Johnny Dee. When you're hearing all these stories in the world, like Si said, it gets depressing. So I want to share something with y'all and then get your feedback. You ready? Yep. Go ahead.

This is from Luke 517. one day Jesus was teaching and the Pharisees and teachers of the law were sitting there. They had come from every village of Galilee from Judea and Jerusalem, and the power of the Lord was with Jesus to heal the sick. Some men came carrying a paralyzed man on a mat and tried to take him into the house to lay him before Jesus. When they couldn't find a way in because of the crowd, they went up on the roof and lowered him

on his mat through the towels into the middle of the crowd right in front of Jesus. That's good friends. Look, when Jesus saw their faith, he said, friend, your sins are forgiven. I mean, what kind of friends does it take to do something like that for you? I mean, the people that usually that I deal with, when I bring something up, they're like telling me every reason why we can't do it, you know? Instead of saying, get in. Yeah.

Hey, I got an idea. Here's what we're going to do. We're going to slip in through the roof, break the towels, and let him down on a rope. And even myself, I get tied up with, yeah, something won't work. But you forget about the power of God in your life. You know, God's plans aren't going to be your plans. Boy, ain't that the truth. Yeah.

Try going from one child to two on an ultrasound. immediately. So I wanted to kick it to you guys and, you know, just say, what do y'all think about that? The way the world is so negative right now, if these guys would have stopped and listened to the world, they never would have got their friend in to be healed by Jesus. Oh, I got to admit, I was the friend for a long time that was like, you had an idea like that? Oh, yeah, let's figure it out. We'll get it done. Now that I've gotten older, I'm like, I'm kind of like that other friends you're talking about. I'm like, man, do we really want to do this? But I think that's kind of probably out of some laziness, if I'm being honest.

Like, man, this is a bad idea that could keep us up all night. I used to be like all in for those decisions because I wanted, I was really interested in how they turn out. Like, but yeah, I mean, I would do that for any of you guys. I mean, and I feel the same way about y'all, though. Like, I mean, there's a certain group of people that, you know, when they text or call, you're like, all right, I mean, whatever, whatever that takes, You know, and then, but you do. You get run down by the world and think of every reason not to do something instead of thinking, well, maybe this will be used, you know, for some greater purpose.

So, no, I can appreciate that, that verse. And the faith that it took for those guys say, you know what, we're going up there. Yeah. You know. I mean, think about it. One of the old dudes said, I'm sure, like, some of them are, what are we doing? And one of them said, just bust a hole in the roof. Yeah, let's go to the roof.

He got a look. The idea, man. Because me, you know, being the offensive lineman guy, I said, oh, I can make a hole through this crowd. And me, I got him. Yeah, and I would have said, hey, guys, let me just go talk to somebody. This ain't going to work, but let me handle it. And I'd go try and talk my way into it. Yeah.

Well, one thing that you've got to overcome to begin with is we're all selfish. Oh, preach it. No. So the first thing you've got to beat is yourself. Okay. and Tim McGraw has a song about he got the bad news that he was diagnosed with cancer. And one of the lines in, he changed the way he started thinking of things, his perspective. I remember that song.

And said, I want to be a friend like that you should be. I started striving to be the friend I wanted. Yeah. So the good thing about the friends that man had, okay, they had the right perspective. they had got over me. Okay, their first hurdle. And it was thinking of only, hey, how can I help him? And they all knew if I can just get him to Jesus, Jesus can do something for him.

Yeah, I may not have the answers, but I know who does. Yeah, yeah, it's the thing about, hey, I don't know the answer, but hey, if you'll give me a little time, I can go find somebody that probably can give you the answer. Yeah. because anything I've studied with a guy one time in the military. And he referred to the Bible, God's Holy Word, as a classic. And I had told him, I said, that's the first time I've ever heard anyone talk about, you know,

the Bible is a classic. He said, I've read it from front to back. So I challenged him because we had talked. I'd let him read a verse, and he said, I was judging him, and I said, whoa, whoa, whoa, nope, you'll never catch me in doing that. I said, number one, I'm not qualified. I'm a senator. And I said, but here's the deal.

Whatever problem you can come up with, I said, either I or someone I get in touch with, I can find the answer in the Bible for you. I said because God didn't leave nothing out that man is going to run into. Yeah. So how did he respond? And he just said, well, all right, give me a little time. Yeah. Well, my lady, he'd come back and say, what about this?

You know, that one, that was easy. I said, hey, here's the verse for that. Bam. Yeah. Boom. Yeah. Well, hey, he's done it about twice. Yeah.

And after that, he'd never come back. Okay. But trust me, if there's anything that you want to find, the answer to, trust me when I tell you this, it's in, it's in the Bible. Now, you may have to get someone like Matt Owens. Yeah. Okay, that's a scholar in, in the Bible. Well, the biggest problem is, most of time you don't like the answer. Well, not on that. Like some people, yeah. Oh, I don't know. I ain't go read what Paul wrote. Yeah. Yeah. I've heard that before. You took a lot out of the Bible, then if you're not going to read what Paul wrote. Right.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. But it goes back to the first hurdle you got overcome is yourself. Is me. Yeah. If you get out of the way and let Jesus work with you, oh, he will surprise you with what he can do. So, so I don't know what this guy on the mat was thinking.

I mean, he's looking up at his boys. He's like, what, is it his plan? Is he like, all right, guys, here's what we're going to do? I think it, I think, this is funny. This is one of my favorite stories. Oh, is it? I've done a lot of divos on this at Manchin Treats and stuff. Awesome.

And I've always said you're one of the guys in the story. Yeah. You're either the friends. You're the guy on the mat. You're the Pharisee. Or you're just in the way and you're part of the crowd. It's not really doing anything but listening to not doing anything about anybody. That's awesome.

Right? Because those guys, the crowd's like, oh, they're not worried about the guy that needs healing. They're trying to listen for themselves. The Pharisees are over there sticking their nose up in there and saying, mm-mm, mm-mm. Nope. But this guy had to let his, I get he was paralyzed, right? Yeah.

But he had to let his friends take him to Jesus, right? Otherwise, he could have said no. Yeah, drop your pride. He could have said, you ain't carrying me through this crowd. So I've always said, and I've been the guy on the mat at times in life, and I think one of the greatest parts of this story is like, you can't do this by yourself. If you're in a place where your world's messed up or you need some sort of healing, emotionally, spiritually, physically, you're going to have to have some boys or ladies around you

that'll do crazy stuff and go through roofs for you and get you to Jesus. And so I've always said that like you're somebody in this story. You're not Jesus, but you're one of the people in this story. Are you in the crowd? That's excellent. I've done a lesson and he asked the question as far as I'm concerned. Which one of them are you? which person are you?

Yeah, and I think you can say we've all been guilty of being every person in that story at some point of our life, right? Like, I mean, that... And you want to be guilty of being those friends because those were legit. Yeah, you want to be those guys.

You want to think of yourself as toting one of the four corners of that blanket. Yeah. It's a hard pill to swallow when you were the one laying in a blanket. Been there. But then the times when you was over there just turning his nose up at it, like,

no, this ain't for me. I ain't got time. Or he ain't for you. Been there. Like, that's what I'm saying. I mean, at some point in life, like, we have done every part of that story other than the Jesus part. Yeah. We ain't there.

Like, we... And your goal needs to be the four dudes that H had a corner and the guy looking up saying, I can't do this by myself. And if you're listening to Newsflash, you can't do that. Whatever, you're thinking of something right now, you can't do it by yourself. Yeah, I've tried. You need people to carry you to Jesus. Well, the cool thing is, too, like they talked about carrying them on a blanket. it so you know that it's not one person.

What they're saying is get yourself surrounded by the right people. Like you need, everybody in your life has a purpose, right? Like their strengths are a lot of times your weaknesses. He's godsend. And their weaknesses are a lot of times your strengths. So that's what, I mean,

it's saying like build this up around you. And then let's all get there together. Like that's a cool. And then the coolest part of the whole thing to me wasn't, they laid him down and it wasn't, all right, you're healed, get up, walk. It says when Jesus saw their faith. Their faith.

Not his faith, not her faith, the group's faith. He said, friend, which had to be like super cool. Jesus Christ said, friend. Yeah, that's cool. And then he says, he doesn't say you're healed. He says, your sins are forgiven. Yep. Which is, I mean, I mean, that's even cooler.

Yeah, that's even cooler than being healed. But I've told people that I've met, okay? I said, here's the deal. If you try to do it all by yourself, you're going to fail. What you need to do is surround yourself with like-minded people. Yep. It's way easier to be a good guy or a good person. If you surround yourself with people that are of like minds, they're good.

Yeah. Because if you surround yourself with a bunch of bums, Okay, because my mama, my mama told me when I was about, oh, what, maybe eight, you will be known your reputation. You will be known your reputation by those that you run with. And that's always stood to test the time. Yep. Oh, yeah. It's definitely guilty by association.

Okay. She said if you run with dogs, you're going to get. Well, no, no. Yeah, if you lay down with a dog, you're going to wake up and have fleas and ticks on them. Okay. You know, so it's way easier to be a religious person if you surround yourself with people of the like mind. Yeah. And you know.

Leave in God, the Father, Holy Spirit, Son, Holy Spirit. Okay. Then instead of running with the evil one, okay, that don't want no part of it. they're always doing the wrong things yeah well let's pick it back up after our first break we'll be back right after this man unashamed part two we'll get back on the negative here it won't take long oh yeah you know yeah because i want to go on that I know people that well go well go okay let's go on go sall the green white is on on the hat side hold on side before you go but the reason why I was wanting to talk about this is just because

this story gives me hope. And as I was reading and studying, I said, you know, the world needs hope. It just does. Yeah. I mean. And sometimes your hope is you got to crawl on your hands without the use of your legs onto a mat

and look up at your friends, Cy, Phil, Martin, and say, here's what, this is what I need you to do. That's an excellent point because I've seen each one of you and you've seen me in a situation where we need to grab one of the corners of that. blanket. Absolutely.

I mean, well, and I think what you just said, too, there and what Johnny D's point is on the hope part, like, we can hope all we want to, right? Yeah.

But without action, what good is the hope? Like, and these boys and the guy on the blanket took action. Right. And he was faith and their hope. And he had no ability to take the action.

He had to beg, who, like, what was he, who knows what he was doing before? He's just sitting in a corner somewhere waiting. Yeah. Or he might have crawled next door and said, hey, I hear about this man, take me to him.

Somehow he made friends with these other four guys. I don't know how that happened. Yeah, you don't know. Was it a bull riding accident? You don't know if he born that way? You don't know what got him to that point. But somewhere along the way, they all ended up together, and it took every one of them. So there's so much in the world that's evil and it's negative.

Yeah, that's why I brought about what my mama told me. Okay. Yeah. This is for the youth, okay? You will be known by the people you hang with. Okay. And they will influence you for good or for bad. Okay.

But I look at the world today. This is 23. And they've got a war going in Ukraine. That's insane. to be 2023 the date and we're still killing each other that's insanity yeah you know that's why i hate to turn on and watch the news hey we're still killing each other right here at home no no no why i'm just saying that that's a sad commentary for the human race for crying out loud yeah yeah oh yeah that's why i mean the bible being religious is simple

All your scholars say it was written on like a fourth or fifth grade level. Okay. And hey, look at that age, you're being, you're like a sponge, okay? You're being formed. You're being trained. Just like somebody's trained these twins. You know, it's the same thing. But I just look at the day.

Okay. There's good in this world, and then there's evil in this. world. And people say, oh, you know, why did God let this happen to me? Folks, God's good. The evil is the,

is Satan. The evil one. Okay. You know, so, hey, look, let's, let's wake up for, you know, good grief. Let's get some common sense on this.

Yep. Yeah, there's enough evil in this world without, you know, you know it's depressing and like you're talking about it is it's very depressing okay we've got a lot of mental illness out there people keep saying about all

every time there's a different shooting yeah they always get to screaming you got to take the guns away look I got a house full of guns the gun itself ain't going to shoot nobody that's right you got to have somebody that's mentally deranged to use it.

Yep. Okay. So, hey, you know, yeah. So look, if you find yourself in this situation where you're hopeless and you've got things going on in your life, you don't know how to deal with, get on a mat. Hope you'll find a friend. And humble yourself and get with your friends. Yeah.

And say, let's try another way. You know, turn to Jesus. It would be my advice. When they run into the crowd that was keeping them from getting this guy on the mat to Jesus. They said, well, hey, let's see what options we have here? Well, hey, I think if we go up and get on the roof, we take the tiles off and we'll lower him down to Jesus.

That's something you would probably say, sir. Well, I'm just saying. You need an idea, man. Hey, that's it. It's like you said before one day, okay? If it's known, it's actually manageable. We can manage it. That's true.

And hey, on the war in Ukraine, it's known. It's evil people doing it. Let's try to do something about it. I don't got fired up. Oh, no. I'm actually getting angry over. I tell you right now, I would have never looked at the roof. A man of my stature.

A man of my stature, I don't really go. Well, look, what if you were on the mat? You'd really have to have some good friends. There'd be eight of us, not four. It'd take everybody in this room because we got some of Hunter's family. And we got Beth and Alex. It takes everybody in a much bigger blanket, I'm sure, for me. Well, that makes me go back to being, okay.

And a pulley. This used to be the United States of America. Right. Okay. Now I said, okay, no, I can't actually say that because, hey, it's just the states of America because we're not united on nothing. That's a good point. It's a good point.

And there's one thing that we could be united on. the one who causes us to have peace. It's not but one God, okay, and there's three of them, and they're one in everything. Yep. It's the Father and Son, Holy Spirit. They're one. Jesus even prayed to prayer.

Let them be one. Let them be one like me and you are, Father. Yeah, and that's all I'm saying. Come on, God. Let's all come together as a world. Yep. Not a nation as a world. And hey, what's the greatest three things, faith, hope, and love.

What's the greatest of it? Love. Love. Yeah, let's learn how to love each other. Human beings loving each other and taking care of each other. And, hey, like Tim McGraw's song said, and be the friend you would want to be. I love, Saul. We go back to a country song.

Oh, no, well, hey, it just, y'all. I went to, whether it's Marl. He was saying, why don't I just stay here and drink further? I mean, whether it's... Here's the deal about music. Uh-oh, now we're going to... Music has always been, how to put this?

Therapeutic. The only... No, there ain't the word. That ain't the word. How do I actually say this? The universal language. It's been neutral. Okay.

There is no racism. Okay. Because, hey, music has always got together. Okay, and it was about, it's the correct way. It's not about me or you. It's about the music we're trying to make. We're trying to sing or play and move you, impact you. Change something into way you think.

Yep. Because music can, hey, make you glad, sad, cry, laugh. Yeah? Yeah. It's a music is a powerful thing. Absolutely. We need to say the side of Taylor Swift concert. I'll go with him.

And look, so our focus needs to be this. He needs to be on the air as tour. Well, I'm serious. I don't challenge. Low key, I'll go with you. Let's come together. United. Good grief.

Sa'all, let's focus on something. And the common thing that I say is we could all focus on getting on that mat and finding Jesus. Yeah. You know, that's what I wanted to tell y'all. Be a friend. About that today. Real friend that you want you to be. Yep.

That's being a good friend. There you go. All right. We'll be back right after this. With emails. Hey, here's a deal. Question for you. All right.

If you had a choice, which person would you be in the story? Well, the guy's carrying the guy. Well, sometimes I want to be the guy that's getting healed. You know, of whatever's got going,

whatever's going on in my life. I mean, not, you know, the same exact thing. but I think we've probably all been, like Martin said, probably. I don't want to be the fairs. But you probably have been at times.

Oh, 100%. Oh, hey. Yes, guilty. 100% guilty. Like, not even a doubt about that. Most of the time, you're probably just the person in the crowd. Yeah, most times. As an American Christian, you're probably just sitting there.

You're in the way. I'm sitting there in the crowd talking to my buddy. I show up to church on Sunday. I actually know of me. I'm probably not in the crowd. I'm probably sitting on a chair where I can see the crowd. I'm probably in the back of the crowd. I'm just being honest.

I mean. I'm like Mark. I'd probably be the one on somewhere off to the side. You know, I'm probably the one over there just kind of chilling. Because I don't like crowds. That's right. And then so I'd be talking to side like,

hey, look at this guy on the, on the mat. Where do they think they're going to do? They'll never get in. Look at them boys tooting him. I wonder what's wrong with him. Yeah. Oh, they're hauling him off.

And not only that. And then I'll be like, I heard he got sick. I'll make, I don't know, you know how people talk about rumors. Phil would be there providing comic relief is what he's saying. Probably. Yeah. It happens. But it was odd that he said, okay, I'll be the guy looking to be hill.

Because most people would shy away from that. Well, we've all needed that. You don't want to be there. Yeah, and we've all had, I mean, you tooted me. You didn't know you were toting me, but you did. Yeah. Like, they brought, you were one of the ones, you, in fact, my blanket had three toters down there in the duck call room, you, Jason Gobbin. Wow.

You didn't know you were to tote me, and I didn't know I needed to be on a blanket. Yeah, you didn't even know if you was there. I didn't even know I was on the blanket. Yeah. But I was, and y'all did, and you never had any idea about it. So, I mean, whether, you know, like, we've all, that's why I think is so profound that you stop and think and realize, holy cow, I was everybody in that story, but Jesus. Yeah. From the naysayers, from the one playing church,

from the one in the crowd, just like get back. Yep. And, you know, like I even said, now the guy sitting over there on his patio, like, man, what's going on over there? You know, and probably the one budget minded up there saying,

golly, it's going to take us a fortune to fix that roof, you know? I never thought of that. No, that was Judas. Judas was in charge of the money. Judas is like, that goes my money. Yeah, like, man, that's going to cost us a fortune. Like, you know,

side me we've all done it all you know it's sign the same way what martin's saying he's he's he's been there for me so has johnny d and so have you um along some path and in my life i've had you guys help me out in some kind of way just like when you were sick and we all helped you yeah well don't feel feel after johnny d'all you ran him out you wouldn't like jesus do you remember that side you remember running johnny d off when he's trying to help no no i remember him showing up and then you all and he said well i stopped by the check on you you okay? Yeah.

Yeah. Turn around, Walt. No, I said, have you taken your medicine? And you looked at me and said, yeah. I said, do you want me to leave? I just checked on your man. I left and I called stones that he said. He's taking a lesson.

I did not say your sins have been forgiven. And he definitely didn't start with friend. Yeah. Brian, get out my friends. What do you want for me? What do you want? Oh, anyway. What's in that hello at duck callroom.

Dotcom inbox, Johnny, do you? Oh, Luke from Virginia. He just emailed in. And we've been talking about Luke. there. Oh, different look, but yeah. Luke from Virginia emails in and he sent a picture. They were all, look, you know

that room you've got to sit in before you get married with all your friends and you're all nervous and feel like you just... Oh, look at that big guy on the front right. You are pulling eggs. Boy, that shirt struggling, ain't it? Golly. They couldn't give me one with their extra X or X? No. Unbelievable. Well, he just wanted to say thank you

for the men of Duck Dynasty. He was watching this exact room right before his wedding. And then he said, we're on our honeymoon now. We have no tips. There you go. That's who he's on his honeymoon with, and he's emailing us.

I hope you catch where I'm going with my advice to you, sir. They're on their honeymoon now. What piece of advice would you give to newly married couples? Get off your computer. Get off your phone while you're on your honeymoon. That's your advice.

But while I'm sitting here on my phone, I don't know if y'all remember this or not, but last year, like... We wished our boy Tripp, who they'd sent in a bunch of pictures of him hunting and fishing everything, a happy birthday. Well, this year he was so fired up by us doing that. He had a duck call room birthday. We had a birthday party?

Yeah, it's duck call room, duck commander, duck dynasty, all of it, man. To celebrate his eighth birthday, there's a little one. There's a little brother. Oh, that's right. I'm talking about. Dress like Willie. So, um, Tripp, happy birthday again, man. Stay with us, buddy.

We've had you for year seven and eight. This is cool. Old trip. I can't wait to see what nine brings us. That's fun. But anyway, there you go. Who knows? Yeah.

Anyways, so, yeah, advice for first year of marriage? Get off your phone. Get off your phone. I think that's where we have to leave it. Yeah, and I'm not even talking about for the honeymoon. I'm talking about when you get home. Get off your phone. That's also good advice, but yeah.

But especially now, but, you know. I'll look at the water or wherever you are. Yeah, yeah. We have a culture that stays on social media. Yeah, and Cy's day, it wasn't like that. So when Cy, I heard him talking to some people saying, hey, go and talk and open your mouth and look at them when you're talking to them, you know? Well, I'd hate to be a teenager today.

Yeah. Yeah. You get your phone out and tell me, you've been called by your girlfriend. That's how they break up. No, they don't even say it. They just ghost you. Yeah. You just get a text.

Hey, you're history, dude. Weed it out. Yeah. Yeah. Weed it out. Well, while we're on the subject of marriage, let's just keep helping marriages today. Young marriages.

Dalton, dude from Grayson, emails in. Louisiana? I guess so. He put the dude from Grayson in quotation. We might have read it before. I'm having trouble remembering. I thought you saw a great friend. They will be celebrating their one-year anniversary here in a couple of weeks.

They have no clue what to do. Any ideas. I was thinking of taking her out to go out to eat and go fish in, but that just seems like a typical Saturday, but she does love to do that. He just wants to make it a little more meaningful. What did we do to celebrate our one-year anniversary? I can't say that I remember.

That's seven years ago. Two years ago. You know what? I think I remember. I think I'm going to be embarrassed, but go ahead. I do the traditional. I Google traditional gifts or whatever. You do you that.

Yeah, I do it every year. You're the traditional, man. Yeah, I don't go for the like the current or modern. I do traditional. So whatever that said, I got an array of things. I don't remember what your one is. Paper. Paper.

Yeah. So like, oh, I remember, I got like a bouquet of paper roses so that they're like, stay fair. She still got them, by the way. So that's kind of cool. Yeah. Yeah, I did a bunch of stuff with paper and just kind of tried to make it special that celebrated our first year.

That's turned into something big because my wife got, you know, from her daughter, you know. Her daughter, not yours. Hyper roses. Yeah. Paper roses. Yeah. Celebrating a year. We were so broke our first year of marriage. I was pushing buggies in Abilene, Texas at the, okay, I remember where it was. Super 1? H.E.B. No, it was, I did some stuff at H.E.B. But no, I think this was at the, uh, maybe it. I can't remember. Some place I was having to push buggies. I'm getting old. I was stacking. I was. Stacking. I was. apples my first year. We never went out to eat because we were so broke.

But we planned an evening and we planned it together. It just wasn't me. It was her. And we went out and ate and it was very nice. And we couldn't afford a bunch. So it made it more special. That's what we did on our first anniversary. We looked at that wedding cake.

You know, you're supposed to take a bite of that or whatever? Yeah, we did that. I just peeled the deal. No. Yeah, we took a bite and said. No. Let's go to ask. Sam's Warehouse, by the way, that's what it was.

Sam. Sam's in Abilene. Sam's in Abilene. Sy, what you do on your one-year wedding anniversary? He was probably in... Oh, yeah, 53 years ago, I have no idea. Yeah, Sire, take a guess. Take a guess, Sire.

What would you want to do on your first year anniversary? How old Tracy? This is a family show. How old Trace of, 52? No, I'm kidding. I'm pretty sure I'd basically convinced her to go on a trip just so we could go to a Saints game and did all the stuff I wanted to do.

Oh, yeah, you're a December game. Yeah, so I think we went to a football game, but we went out to eat or something. Yeah, you wouldn't. Do what y'all like to do. Yeah, I mean, if it's go fishing and go eat, then go fish and go eat. If it's stay in and cook for or, you know, whatever. My mom and dad go brim fishing on every one of their anniversaries. That's a good.

And then they cook it for us. That's a country girl for you. Well, country's a strong word. You can take the girl out of Rocky Branch, but you can't take the Rocky Branch out of the girl, I guess. Branchy. All right, are we good for a Bible verse, even though we already had one? Because you stopped at free and your sins are forgiven, so I'm going to continue with the rest. The Pharisees and the teachers the law began to thinking to themselves,

who is this fellow who speaks blasphemy? Who can forgive sins but God alone? That was a mistake. Jesus knew what they were thinking and asked, why are you thinking these things in your heart? And this got to be, this has just the, this had to be cool, which is easier to say your sins are forgiven or to say, up and walk. But I want you to know that the son of man has the authority on earth to forgive sins.

So he said to the paralyzed man, I tell you, get up, take your mat and go home. Immediately he stood up in front of them, took what he had being lying on, and went home praising God. Everyone was amazed and gave praise to God. They were filled with awe and said, we have seen remarkable things today. I think if you're going to take anything out of this whole discussion, if you're in a bind, if you have something going on, God has the ability to fix that,

but you're going to have to get some people around you to take you there. And you've got to get advice from them. You've got to get prayers from them. And when God sees the faith of all of you, he will say your sins are forgiven first, and then he'll heal you next, which is huge. Excellent. So thanks for bringing that up, Bill.

That's a very important order of things, by the way. Yeah, yeah. The healing no good without the forgiveness of the sins. Amen. Oh, we'll see y'all next time. here in the duck call room. We'll bring our club award with us.