Duck Call Room - Uncle Si Remembers a Sting That Landed Him in the Hospital!

Episode Date: September 23, 2025

Uncle Si reacts with pure bewilderment to Gen Z dating after hearing about Hunter’s “date night” antics, and admits he’s unlocked a brand-new fear thanks to Rucker’s late-night experience in the dark at home. Martin gets launched into full “biologist mode” over the aftermath, and John-David takes it upon himself to beg the German people for clarity on one of Si’s wildest cultural claims. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the duck call room, ladies and gentlemen. We wanted to give Rucker a morning off. Yeah, yeah, you know. There's been a lack of sleep in my home. Has it? So this one's not a sleeper? He's 15, man. Grow up.

Well, the new one. Why is he sleeping? What are you doing? There's a new one. And he's only three weeks old. Three weeks? Three weeks. I don't want to hear it.

You just got one. That thing's older than three weeks. You had to do two at once, which is. It's only three weeks? It's only been three weeks? been three weeks. There you go. Oh, wait a minute. This week will be four. I'll think of say. This week will be four. Are you sure? Yes. Yeah. What is the child's birthday? I know his birthday. Do you? What is it? The 20th. August the 20th. August. August.

August. August. I'm going to fact check that just in case. Yeah, he's going to check it. It's the 20th of August. Yeah, so three days from being a month old. There you go. But things are going good. He is sleeping about four, sometimes five hours. But you know, During the day. Well, I've been, so this is what I did, right? And look, you can't really sleep train them at this stage because you've got to eat every two to three hours. Yeah. But during the day, what we do is open up all the blinds, turn on all the lights, and then at night shut it all down, make it quiet and dark.

So that way, you know, you realizes there's a difference between daytime and nighttime. Yeah. Yeah, I remember doing all that, man. It was because even during the day, you wanted to sit in the dark because you were so tired. It was easy to want to close the blinds and just kind of hunker down, Mo, but now you got to have that sucker lit up like a Christmas tree at all times. Oh, yeah. Well, my wife is a, man, she's incredible.

She's been just knocking it out the park and I'm there. Look, I'm on the support team. You know what I mean? I'm there for encouragement to help, you know. And I'll take like the, I'll take the early night shift. So I'll get home from being out. and about doing things that I have to do to provide. And then, you know, I'll take between the hours of somewhere from five to midnight, you know, let her sleep.

Yep. And then I'll go to bed at midnight. So we kind of got a little system rolling. Yeah. You know, that's awesome, man. Yeah. I mean, that's kind of the same deal we did. When I'd get home from work, I'd take over.

I did all the night stuff, though, because, like, I could sleep through that stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You dropped him yet? No, I ain't dropped him yet. I dropped Ben's. you're going to want to eat at 2 a.m. I might fall asleep holding you, and you might hit the ground.

It's just part of life. Well, I have, you know, I've held him and fell asleep, but he hadn't hit the ground or nothing. Benz was all swaddled up, fell out, and I just kind of watched him roll. Yeah. It's on me, bro. If you're watching this when you're older, I apologize.

Then he gets to the age out yesterday where Jackson thought he was a big man and grabbed a 10-pound dumbbell. Oh, yeah. And held it for a minute. That's impressive. Nope. But, oh, both of them.

Both of his feet. Yeah, because it fell long ways. Yeah. And, yeah, both of them. Yeah, that's a good time. That's not really a parenting win, so to speak. Y'all just got 10-pound dumbbells laying around the house? Brittany does, yeah, in the closet.

She does a little of this, little that every day? Yeah, she gets up in the morning and does her stuff in our closet. And so generally a pretty safe place. but every now and then they wander in there. They don't generally go in there a whole lot. So it's never been an issue. Yeah, that's kind of a boundary zone because that's where my gun safe and gun products

and all that stuff is. So it's always, it's kind of been a no-flies on. Yeah, hey, get out of there. So most of the time they don't even wander in there. But yesterday they did. They start doing them weights. Yeah, yesterday he did. He picked it up and I guess he didn't know how to sit it down.

or I don't know. I mean, the kid ain't but three and holding 10 pounds. I guess that's pretty good. No, that's good. I don't know if that's strong or not,

but you know, who knows? Well, if he held it for a minute, like, you know, pick it up, okay,

but like for a three-year-old to pick it up and hold it. Yeah, it must have been walking with it or something to get both feet. Nobody knows, really, because it was just kind of a disappear moment.

We were all, you know, cooking dinner, got the dog, like all the thing. And the next thing you know, you just hear a blood, curdling scream and you go in there and you find out like oh yeah that's a toughie yeah yeah

the good news is you the longer you do this the more you find out there made a rubber so yeah yeah yeah i am enjoying i am enjoying the the new baby though man like i really am you know it's been a long time it's been a long time and uh yeah it's just it's it's cool you know he's a super super cute little kid, little baby. And, you know. That's about it.

Well, yeah, you know, you can't really, you know. Ain't a lot going on. Can't play catch with him yet. No,

his only communication method is screaming at this point. Oh, so does he yell at you a lot? Oh, yeah. Oh, he's a screamer. Oh,

he's a screamer. He's a, you know, his cry isn't very soothing. His cry is more of a scream. He kind of sounds like a taradactal. Oh. Or an eagle.

He gets your attention. It's one of those high-pitched out there. Yeah. Yeah, I don't miss that stage. No, yeah. At least now when they cry, there's legitimately something wrong. Right, right. Yeah.

It's not, you don't have to play the guessing game, which is what I hate. Yeah, what is it? Yeah, now we can, ooh, I'm thriving now. Now it's my tummy hurts or, you know, we can at least talk about what the issue is. Right, right. That first, while the communication is only that, man, that was hard for me because you just throw stuff at a wall, man. Well, you see them, like at this, that newborn, literally, you see them grow so rapidly and change. Like, so when, you know, when he was firstborn, obviously, changing a diaper was highly upsetting to him.

He was not a fan of getting his diaper. I thought you were going to say to you. No, no. Which is fine. No, I mean, you know. Agreed. But now he's like chilling, you know, whenever he gets his diaper change. She's like, okay, now I know what's happening here.

Yeah, now I know my, yeah, now I know my tallywacker ain't going to be cold for forever. It's a brief moment of cold and then we'll get through this. I will say this. That boy's first action on earth was urinating in his own mouth. Ew. I'm telling him. That's how it happened. He came out the wound.

They set him, you know, clean him up, set him on her chest. And he went for it and he was crying. and it right in his mouth. This show always goes back to peeing. It did the other day. We're back. Yeah. I will say that when Waylon and Jackson entered this world,

they peed all over their mama. First thing, they held them up, show them to us, and they're just like a sprinkler. Oh, yeah. I mean, the aim was impeccable. There was no cleanup necessary. I'm just glad in our group text between my wife and Johnny Dee's wife and Johnny D., that it's not weird for.

for you to take pictures of your kids peeing. Because Johnny D. went through the archives. I'm ready to be out of this stage and the stage where we're going, duck hunting and all the things. And that way we can get them their very first digital duck stamp at duckstamp.com. Yeah. And that's what you got to do.

Whenever they're a kid, get them a digital duck stamp, a real duck stamp. Duckstamp.com. But mainly get out of the potty training stage. Like where you're at looking back is not bad. this stage of never knowing where the human excrement is going to end up is not very far. Although I'm really sad. I don't have that. I thought I had a video of me just spraying a kid down in a flower bed.

I couldn't find that one. Well, the most impressive one you sent was Carter peeing at the beach or whatever. Yeah, I put that one up the other day. That is. Is he just right there at the beach? Buddy, Paul, tree. Sunset in the back. Oh, no, no, no.

Look, that's my time. Like, over your head. He would have cleared your head. How are we back here? Because you sent a bunch of pictures of your kids peeing, and they were fantastic. You're about to be the stage where they never put clothes on again. Well, that's fine. That's the thing about Germany.

Okay, in Germany? What are the Germans doing? Oh, no. Hey, I'm serious. You German freaks? No, no, look, I'm serious. Germans, if they're walking down, like a sidewalk, they just take a leak. Hey, they just whoop it out and take a leak.

You have not been to Germany in a long time. I think that's probably changed. No, hey, they still do it. I'm telling you. Dear German listeners, If you're out there, will you please explain to Pum Poo-Pah that that's not a thing anymore? Well, I'm just saying how they do it. Okay.

Please email in. Well, they do it in New Orleans all the time. Don't make it right. Well, no, but I'm just saying. That's a felony charge nowadays. Well, I'm just saying, hey, it's the culture, okay? I'm serious. What is the culture?

Piss on it? Hey, yeah. Hey. Look, if you got to go. You got to go. You got to go. No. Oh, that's fantastic.

I've been to Germany. I don't, I never saw anyone paying. I've had it. I've had it. You were in the wrong places. I've had it happen numerous times. But I did spend 12 years over there. Was it you?

Did you do it? Oh, I did it before, yeah. No, no, how it was part of the culture. Just in the street? Well, I'm just saying, hey, when in Rome, do it was wrong. You weren't in Rome. You were in Germany. I know it.

Hey. Hey, to be fair, I've seen Thigh urinate in some pretty questionable places. The man drinks a lot of time. I've seen a couple of mines happen on a plane. Yeah, if you drink two gallons of tea a day, yeah, you use the restroom a lot. Yeah, you be in some pretty... If you're functioning right. Yeah, you'd be in some pretty questioning places.

No way, I'll tell you. Well, in certain times of inebriation, I did the same thing. Well, you know, you fit it more into New Orleans than Germany. Yeah, yeah. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means? That means more outside cooking.

And y'all know. We love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Tritels Beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good? It's so good. Our friend, Sao Robertson would say, buy on the grill! Look, before we got Tritels, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes to them.

But with Tritels beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Tritails comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch, so they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I'll tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living,

you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Tritails Beef. I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat. She ain't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah.

Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. And Hunter dropped at Celsius, so I'm seeing a mad scramble over there. If you never hear from us again, it's because Hunter just dropped a full energy drink on the control. board. Is this your first day?

Honor's back. I'm just a little sick. Hunter, how was... The dude's sickly, man. Have I not told you about age he won yet? I mean, good. Great, Hunter. It's been five years and you're still sick?

I got off the plane and immediately got sick. Well, the Louisiana air would do that to you. Well, it won't. That's what long-distance love affairs do, do you? You sick? He was so sad. to be away from his woman. He got up there.

He landed at home. No, I landed there and got sick. No, he landed there and got sick. Where's she at, North Carolina? Yeah. North Calcutta. North Calacca. Yeah.

How was your visit? Yes. Update us on things. Oh, I've already asked. Y'all had any chain rush. He had a wonderful time except for getting sick. Yeah. We went to mellow mushroom.

Again, with that, that is the most. I've never been. We sat at the mushroom table. It was cool. Uh-oh. What is this a restaurant? It is a chain of pizzas. Oh, it's a pizza place.

A pizza place. It's okay. Yeah, it's not terrible. We had a date at a Spirit Halloween and we carved pumpkins. Hold on. Hold on. Back up. Back up.

You went on a date to the store and the abandoned building that just has Halloween costumes? Yes. A month and a half in advance. Yeah, that's weird. Correct. Did y'all wear the costumes? We did. Did you purchase them or did you just try them on?

We just tried them on. Also, hold on. You said that y'all carved pumpkins there? No, no, no, we carved pumpkins later that day. So you're just not going to see her. So you said, you know what? It's October 31st. Let's do this.

Yeah. Let's just have Halloween today. Yeah. But then you didn't even purchase the costume. And I didn't even get no candy. That's kind of the way I do Britney's birthday cards. It gets close to her birthday. I'm like, hey, read one of them.

I'm not spending $7 on it. I used to give people. people like 2250 in a white piece of paper and say could have could have got you a card but enjoy this extra 250 yeah there you go yeah the uh what what what what what costumes yeah i got a what's your thing i got pictures i got oh right send them send them send them so you're getting pretty serious now right like this is a well yeah they're going to try on costumes but not by them how much more serious can you get well but i mean so you're not even committing to the costume man Oh y'all didn't buy the cost

No You put them on there Yeah they just tried them all I mean he didn't want rocket money To get him right Dollard We're just getting them all What was that spirit Halloween in

A Bedbath and Beyond or No Some strip area But what did it used to be You can always tell It was a strip mall I don't know I'm not from there

I don't know anything up there Are any of these costumes Like known characters and stuff because I want to take a guess here. I'm going to go with no, don't know what this is. Oh, I like it. I like it.

What? It's, that's, y'all, y'all are scary costume people, aren't you? Well, that's not, we're still never going to know what Hunter's girlfriend looks like

because she's got a mask on and every thought of it. What they, like, they've started, that's not it. That's a Walmart. That's a Walmart. That's a Walmart,

dude. Oh, yeah, that's at Walmart. So they started making scream like Power Rangers. What is that? You can do all the different colors of screen? Okay. Oh, okay.

They made memes of pumpkins. You were the most Ginzy person I know. Actually, she made the meme. I was doing a calcifer from House Moving Castle. I don't even know what you did. Say, I never feel old until I start talking to Hunter. Is yours the back one? No, that's hers.

That's Elmo. In front of the fire. I've seen that. Oh, really? Yeah, that's on the internet. I don't know what. I would have called that like heat miser from the year without a Santa Claus. But Hunter's got some mad pumpkin carbon skills.

He's got layers to this thing, and he told me what it was, and I still don't know. It's a Calsifer. What does that mean? He's a fire spirit from an anime movie. Oh, my God. Okay. Here we go. Yeah.

Hunter. Anyway, I had a lot of fun. Thanks for asking. Oh, yeah. I love Hunter. I love... It's thick and got out of a lot of fun. Oh, man, Hunter, yeah.

That's okay. Well, Annie went and I had pizza. What a lot? Yeah. So that was the costume. What were the costumes? I don't even know what we were. We were just being goofy.

That's the scream mask. Yeah, well, I knew that. I dressed her up as a plague doctor. A plague doctor? Are you worried about the plague? No, it's just funny. That is true. Plags are always hilarious.

Hunter, I'm happy for you, man. Thank you. You're flying hours away and you're spending time with a woman. Making me feel weird. I love it. You know, you got weird stuff going on. You know, hey. Hey, man.

I was really hoping. it was going to be like when you said we tried on costumes i was like i'm but he's about to send me the greatest like no like star wars couple's costume ever and instead it's just just a mask however what's what she got on for a face mask yeah yeah yeah it's a mask yeah i'm not showing her face for the for the fans to know what she looks like i like keeping that that side private oh oh hey man that's i wasn't i wouldn't want to kiss her she'd suck your face off i do have an interesting interesting story that I don't know if any of y'all have experienced this. I know you've probably seen them, but you maybe hadn't experienced. I got stung by a scorpion yesterday in my house.

A scorpion? Yep. In Louisiana? Yep. Stripe, Bart Scorpion. Wow. Hold on. We've got them. I've never seen one. Hey, what's crazy. No, no, no, no, no. It was so. Can we, can we preface this with he also thinks he's French and Indian? Continue. No, this is a true story. I got the Scorpion. I killed him and brought him with me. Why is he why is he not in here? He's in my truck. Oh no, no, no. Okay. Step out. We're going to take a break.

Yes. Go get the Scorpion because I'm going back to the NWO days also. So Sting. I got to pee. Because I had the same adventure you had except it was in bed. All right, so all of the listeners, viewers. I apologize for thinking you were crazy. I won't see this. Because he

brought it in and that thing is scary. No. So look, let me tell you the story. So, oh, man,

that's stanger. Oh, yeah. Throw it to the camera. Oh, they don't pop you now. Hunter, Hunter,

put this on the camera somehow. I don't know. Oh, we'll do some close-ups. Yeah, we'll do it.

Yeah. That thing's gross. So look, here's the deal. All right. So my wife in the, in the newborn babies

in the room, and I'm trying not to wake them up, right? Because they're getting some sleep that they need. Yeah. And so,

I walk, I need to put my belt on. Belts make noise when you put them on. What? Yeah, because whenever I put a belt on, I let it hit the floor and all kinds of stuff. Anyways.

Look, dude. Not asking any questions. So look, I walk in the living room and I'm putting my belt on. And I'm just wearing my socks, you know, no house shoes, nothing.

And I'm in the living room and I feel something like sting my big toe. No. And it's like right on the tip of my big toe. And I feel something sting. And I was like, man, did I step on something? Is there like a tack on the floor or something? Well, then it started throbbing.

And I said, well, that's not normal. So I walk over there and I turned the light on. I almost didn't. I'm glad that I did. I walk over there, I turned the light on. And I started looking like, man, what did I step on? What was? And then I've seen this dude just hanging out on my living room floor.

Right? So we got hardwood floors and stuff. Like so it's, um, and I'm like, oh, you know what I mean? It takes you back. Oh, it's a scorpion. Yeah. Right. So me, I'm more of a, whenever it comes to fight or flight, fights my typical go-to.

So I get a, I get a house shoe and, uh, I smash that dude. Fights my typical go-to. Yeah. Grab my house shoe. So I grab my house shoe and I, and I squash him. I hit him. And, uh, and this is, this is his remains. this is him.

And I was like, well, okay, because I think they're venomous and stuff. So I start looking it up. And thanks to AI, chat GPT, I was able to successfully identify the scorpion and realize that the only time I should go to the ER is if I have difficulty breathing if I start drooling or something like that. But it was, I mean, it caused, I mean, my toes swole up. it caused some pain all the way, you know, kind of up to my knee. Really? Man, we got two scorpions here. Yeah, yeah.

So you got this one, which is the striped bark scorpion. Yeah. And there's another one. The other one sounds way more terrified. Yeah, yeah. The Southern Devil Scorpion. Yeah. What?

And these are in our homes? So they live under wood, rocks, and things like that. This one doesn't really climb walls or anything. There's one in Arizona. The bark scorpion, not striped bark that'll climb walls and whatnot. I love how much, when did this happen? Yesterday. I'm learning more about them than I ever had.

Rucker in 18 hours is learn more about scorpions than I ever having my life. Because Noah, I'm getting ready to take Noah to school. He's 15 and he's like, Dad, I think you should go to the doctor. I'm like, nah, I'd be fine. He's like, dad, I don't think that's normal. Most people don't get stung by scorpions around here. Good point. And I'm like, no, it'll be fine.

So me and him, we sit there, we researched it, you know. Yeah, no, I don't blame me. I'm sitting here researching it now because that thing, I've always known that I didn't really care for how Scorpions looked. Yeah, they're scary. But seeing one right here beside me, now I can confirm, we call him Pesty. Oh, yeah, yeah. And he ain't got no place in my home.

No, no, no. My next phone call was to the realtor. No. Oh, okay. I'm out. To the fire department and my house is on fire? Don't ever invite me

to your house. No, the exterminator. I'm like, hey, what's the preventative options we got? So he was in your shoe? No. He was just on the floor? He was just on the floor in the living room.

And you stepped on him. Well, I stepped near him because he tagged me with that. He tagged me with that day. Yeah, that's crazy. Your toe changed, and he? Yeah, it got swollen and stuff. It was red, but it, you know, it doesn't affect.

it's not deadly. Yeah, not to adults. Children and the elderly have to be really careful. I actually went to the emergency room, okay, like two days later, okay, because I popped it. When, you know, where he had stung me on the elbow. You got stung in the elbow? Oh, yeah. Where?

And it swelled up and pushed up. Well, I popped it like an idiot. Well, when I did, two days later, I come home and, hey, I'm thinking I'm having a heart attack. Oh, yeah? No, no. And my wife raises my t-shirt up, and I, I've got blood poises. You can see the veins and, hey, it's going all across my chest.

When was this? It's been, you know, years ago. Oh, my God. But I actually spent the night in the hospital with IVs and all these crap. And they watched me like for two days. Well, I think I got lucky. Number one, I was wearing socks, right? So I think maybe.

So he didn't pop you with a full, full pressure. I think that maybe helped me a little bit. Yeah. Number two, I recognize, you know, it was quick. And it says, look, you got to. wash the area, put, put like ice on it. I didn't do any of that. Yeah.

I didn't do any of that, you know. I texted Caitlin. Well, you got a good immune system. Well, I texted Caitlin. And I was like, I was like, look, I'm not really too concerned. But, you know, what, you know, she's like, I'll take some ibuprofen benadryl if you feel funny. And so, but yeah, I mean, and I'll tell you this.

As a father, I'm thankful that it stung me. Yeah. And I'm thankful that, like, it would be. Yeah, because you could have got your baby. Well, that's what I'm saying. I'm thankful that it stung me. And especially with the boys at the age that they are. Oh, yeah.

I can see them. They about to make him friend, right? In their mind, he's a friend. Yeah. Oh, no. Yeah. But I have lived here. That's why I say the other one's way more terrifying,

because it says only about an inch and a half long and similar in size to a fingernail. You wouldn't ever think nothing about that. No. No. But this one's big, I mean, you could, I mean, I mean, but that's still small in the grand scheme. Like, I always thought they were bigger than that, I guess.

I don't know why I would. Well, so growing up in Texas, like, you know, and I've been on a few construction sites in my day, they would come in through the, like, where we were getting bricks from before you lay the bricks on new construction. Yeah, which checks out. They would come in. Martin is deep in his own.

No, I mean, for those that aren't watching, Martin has learned more in the last 10 minutes about Scorpions than I will in my life. Let me tell you something. It's all about how to avoid them suckers. I didn't find the one that popped me because, look, he woke me up out of a deep sleep. And look, yo. Yeah.

I've had other people try to wake me up, and I get violent when you wait and them. Well, I scream. And you're, you're sure it was a scorpion and not a spider? That's what the doctor said. Oh, okay. Because like when I got out of bed, I took the sheets out, shook them, and looked, you all the eye. Yeah. Didn't find it.

Oh, then when I went into the emergency room, you know, that's what the doctor said. He said, you got to talk about a scorpion. Well, I almost did not go and turn the light on. I almost was just, like, went on about my business. And I'm glad I turned the light on and I've seen it. But it'd take you back a second because he was alive. Oh, no.

He didn't look like that whenever I saw it. No. No, he's walking with it up in the hair behind him. Oh, and look, and he wasn't easy. I had to hit him with that shoe two times. Oh, no. After the first time I hit him, he put that tail up with that finger, and he started, I mean, desperation shots is what he was.

I'm disturbed. I mean, yeah. And I'm really kind of pissed at all. Hey, it's softwood rotting. That's where they're in. Well, so we- I legitimately thought these things were like only out in like the desert. Oh.

No, I knew we had them. I just have never seen one. Well, that's what I'm saying. Where do you live? Shudrick. Oh, okay. Oh, well, that. But here's the thing.

So up until this year, because of the baby, all I heated my house with was a wood-burning furnace. So I, you know, during the spring, we're cutting wood, splitting wood, stacking it up. So I got wood stacked everywhere. Oh, that's his house. That's where he come from. Yeah. That's where he come from, the woodpile.

Yeah. You better go burn the wood pile because his brothers and sisters are there. Well, and it's. It makes you wonder, is it male or female? I don't know. If you figure that out, Martin, don't touch it. Dude, it could hurt you. So the house that we live in was my father-in-laws.

And so I said, hey, you ever had a scorpion issue? He said, oh, yeah. We had them in the past. You know, so it, yeah. Oh, they're plentiful. It's just good. I mean. Yeah, they're plentiful.

I've learned so much today. I would rather one of them than a snake. Si? Ten times out of ten. So I would you like to weigh in? No, no, no. I'm telling you. I don't want any of them.

I'm telling you. Spiders don't bother me. Scorpions, I can handle them. I know now. I didn't know up until yesterday, but now I know. Now you know. But snakes, no, dog. Uh-uh.

Can't do it. I have a, when Max, that problem. There's both. There's both. You got a wood pile, snakes get in them to? Oh, yeah. No, I will. Oh, yeah.

I will destroy my entire house and burn it to the ground behind a snake. Yeah. I'm just telling. I don't like anything. No. The Lord needs to come back. This earth is... For more than one reason.

The scorpions is what's going to put me over the edge. Yeah. No. So it's got those two dark stripes down its back. That's how I knew it was the stripe mark scorpion. If you're just listening going down the road, I implore you to go watch the YouTube and like and subscribe and watch Biologist Martin for the last 10 minutes.

Here's the thing. I'm trying to figure out if it's a male or a female, because I'm trying to figure out. how concerns you need to be about potential infestation. No, yeah, yeah. From the limited research, and I'm not touching that thing. That's a little one. No, that's full ground.

That's full ground. Well, no, no, but I'm saying this, they little, hey, they got them things that are like four or six inches long. Yeah, that's why I said. Yeah, but when you see one of them, you'll, yeah. No, they, that stinger is like a clab crawl. Oh, yeah, we don't have those in the, Louisiana. At least we're not. They got them, they got them in Arizona in the desert,

desert areas, Texas, Arizona. Yeah. Arizona. They got them in, hey, they're like four or six inches long. And look, I ain't got one in pens. If you have one, they got that thing about the size of a regular pen. Yeah. Yeah, according to my research, Arizona's the spot. You don't want to be able to because the scorpions. For sure. Because, hey, they're, hey, they're, hey, one of them in Arizona, if they poppy, you got a good chance to die. Did you know females are often more aggressive and more apt to use their stingers, likely as a compensatory defense due to their slower movement?

And that one couldn't get away from Rucker. So it's a female. May it being female. No, it was still sitting there. I mean, if I had a guess, just looking at him, I'm going to go with male. Because it said they got a longer tail and the females tend to be more robust. And he was squashed and he still ain't robust. Yeah.

So I think this was a boy looking for love. I think he was trying to find him a girl, which is probably what got him on the move. Yeah, well, he found himself a bad situation. Well, that happens a lot of times when you go looking for love. Looking for love in all the wrong places. And you look for love in the wrong places, it could cost you your life. Go to church and find your woman there, Scorpions. Yeah.

Are you paying attention, Hunter? Hunter's got him a good one, man. You know, they go to. He does. He's a Halloween. We made her. Very similar. She's a good-looking, hunter.

Oh, y'all've met her? Yeah. Yeah. She's real. Yeah. Good looking woman. Okay. We can confirm.

Look, you guys are outdoorsmen. Yeah, man. The exception of Johnny D. And I felt like this is one that y'all hadn't experienced. No, I had that experience. I'm not going to experience. I haven't. Yeah, I haven't.

No, I'm glad. You ain't missed this. It really wasn't that bad. I think I got lucky. But as far as, like, the. Your son. I have helped you. I think my sock helped me.

So when he popped me, I'm in a dead sleep and for it to wake me up. Yeah. Yeah. He's done something. And it was painful. Like he said, I said, as soon as he popped me,

it was pain and I had just started, it's like a bad toothache. Just, boom, I'm going to go out on a AM here and say I'm probably going to have a nightmare tonight. Hey, oh no. Well,

now you. really now you know i walk around the house and i'm you know you're looking now no well most of them most of them are like two to three inches long the big ones yeah yeah okay it's probably that devil was the other ones that y'all looked at that one's a couple inches long i mean i can imagine if he didn't have his innards splattered his innards well i mean he got got by a house shoe a double-tapped house you mind you not not just a single one which is a lot nicer than i'd have been because I'd have used my own foot and squashed. Yeah, yeah.

We'd have went side. You would have heard. Well, but I was wearing socks. Oh, you didn't have a shoe on. I didn't have a shoe on. That's how he got me. So I was like, man, let me, you know. And Noah, because he was in the restroom,

I have to run by his restroom to get to where I keep the shoes in the mud room. And so he sees me, I said, move, move. And he's all like, whoa, whoa, whoa, what? He goes, what? I said, is a scorpion just stung me? And he said, a scorpion. Yeah. Hey, at 15, I'd have been the same way.

And it's at that point, I'd have been on top of my bed and been like, Dad, that's on you. I don't know, like a homeboy get, homeboys walk around the house barefoot last night. I said, hey, son, I'm just going to tell you, you might want to just watch where you're walking. There's some shoes on. Because that one was just in transit. It says most of them happened because they're in your shoe or something and you don't realize you put your shoe on, heat the opop you. But lucky for me, I don't have very many shoes.

So thank God for that. Well, this is, you talk about dealing with stuff in stages of life with your children. When you get a teenager, let me tell you what you'll deal with. It's just a whole lot of, well, it's a lack of common sense. Right. So this dude, this dude is like. It took me approximately 26 years for me to pull my head out of my area. Well, that's what I'm saying.

Dude walking around barefoot and I said, hey, might want to watch where you're walking. Yeah. He's like, why? And I said, because I got stung by a scorpion this morning. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Like that's what that teenage boys, that's your future.

That's what you would deal with. Oh, yeah. I mean, I see that deer hunt, you know. Yeah. You see them year and a half old bucks, get out there on the food plot and just, you know, lose all good sense, right? Like, hey, the easiest thing in the world to get is a young male. Exhibit A. Yeah.

Yeah. And he stung me and he, he, because it wasn't like I quit. went and turned the light on. Oh, what would you have done if you'd have popped him in like a bunch of of baby scorpions run out? Oh, talk about nightmare. With the baby in the house, I would have got my family and we would have left. That's what we would have did.

And I would have, look, we would have booked. Oh, man. Yeah, I'd have been down front Sunday because I'd have been saying some things I shouldn't have. I can assure you that. One hour. We'd have had to go have a meeting with Elder about what everything that transpired from that point forward.

I'd have moved my family to the church. We've been sleeping in my office. That's great. Oh, man. Well, that's cool. I mean, it sucks for you. Well, yeah, but it turned out okay. I mean, look, we're talking about it now.

We're educating people. I'm educating myself, man. This is cool. But I figured, you know, I was, I brought him with me yesterday because it was like, hey, if this venom thing gets serious. Hey, what kind of scorpion was it? I believe it was a striped bark scorpion. But here he is. You can look at him.

You played it right. Yeah. You know, because I wouldn't have believed you. Yeah, you always go get the body. If you can, you get the body.

Yeah, that's what I, and it gave me a chance to teach no of that. I said, look, something gets you, kill it,

take it with you. That way, yep, that way there ain't no, well, I think, no, you don't need to think,

you need to know. Yeah. Mm-hmm. You know, that's like when a snake bites you kill him and take him with you. Yeah. You kill us.

Well, There ain't no doubt. Was you poisonous? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I hate snake. You know, everybody's always like, hey, that's this snake, don't kill that snake.

He's a good snake. I know that Martin's one of those people. Yeah. I don't believe if I see it, he is dead. Yeah. Whenever I work it outside at my house, I walk around with a snake shooter on my side. Like, that's how, like, there's no. You know, the difference between me and you, I find that way more terrifying.

I can see that snake. I ain't worried about him slipping up on me. And I'm not really scared of snakes as long as I have a weapon on. Enough. Do you live in the wilderness? I live in, yeah, I mean, we're out in the middle of it. That's crazy. If you really want a good read, you go read about the mating process of the strike bark scorpion.

Friends, I promise you this. We got about 15 minutes left in this room today. I ain't looking at no scorpion. I'm shook up. I don't like it. The most disturbing part is the post mating. After fertilization, the female may sometimes try to attack and eat the male. So he typically leaves.

Oh, no. Oh, no. That checks out. He typically leaves quickly. Oh, no. He typically leaves quickly. Yeah. You know, before I got married.

That's why they so mean as a bunch of fatherless households around there, man. That's why they walk around stinging. Yeah. Dad needs to stay involved, man. I mean, his. Absent fathers is the quickest way. to life of crime. His rules of engagement was

Sting first, ask questions later because this dude did not, like, I was just standing there. It ain't like I stepped on him. Yeah. Oh, God. You know? Yeah, he come up to.

He come up to you. Yes, I did. Yeah. Martin, PBS, you have the floor. Oh, scorpions don't lay eggs, which I knew that. They give birth to Live Young. Do you know the average number

of Live Young of that thing? 65. 13 to 47. and they live on their mother's back for a week or two. That's why I said that about when you would have. Oh, man, golly. I'd have died. That's the scariest thing I think I've done that as a younger fellow.

Like when you see like during the fall, I know it's the fall. Yeah, it's like fall going into winter, you'll run across like the wolf spiders in your yard or in your driveway or something. And you're like, golly, that thing's fat. I'm going to step on it to see the squish, right? Because you don't know any better. Well, what you don't realize when you do that, they look so fat because there's a hundred baby spiders on their back. And then when you do, they all go, shoot.

So that's why what got me to think, which wolf spiders, whatever. I'm not worried about a wolf spider. I am. I'm not. We guys. What a wolf spider. I'm trying. The only thing in my mind is every scary creature we're talking about was on that arc with DeNoah.

Yeah. What's you doing, man? Whoa, whoa, whoa. Close that door. What you doing, Terry? Yeah. Put it in reverse. Put that door in reverse.

And kick that scorpion out, man. Yeah, let that sucker drown. How does somebody not open the window and let the mosquitoes go? Like, just letting go, man. They weren't necessary. I don't know. The art is actually a wild thing to consider. As a biologist, are mosquitoes necessary for anything?

Yeah. Yeah, I mean, they really are because they in turn pollinate. They also feed flycatchers. I mean, there is a design to it all. God did not. create anything. I just don't know why he had to make us a food source. No, exactly.

Well, what's the point of a scorpion? Now we need to figure out what? To scare me? Yeah. If Martin's scared to something, I'm out. That's a rule in my life. I'm not scared. I just don't like it.

They have the ego. Here's the deal. Between me and him, I know who's going to win. Right. You don't? Oh, you don't. What if he's in your shoe? Oh, I'm a way.

What if you're asleep likes out? But this one can't kill you. He can't kill you. I mean, unless you're a kid or the elderly with underlying conditions, you should be fighting us. He's an elderly kid right here beside me. But that man beat the C word, bro. Yeah.

Like, Scorpion ain't got a chance. No, man. My man went into the hospital with the thing that was knocking off everybody, and he's still here. That's what I'm saying. He's got wherewithal. Yeah, he can, the good Lord ain't done with him yet. And I don't, I don't see size fittingly going out with a scorpion sting

or a snake bike because he ain't going to get close enough for that. that. Oh, yeah. But, like, the terrifying part about that thing is that he could be anywhere. That's, but I ain't scared. Like, because when it comes to me and- Do you think Noah had like a special section in the ark that's like, don't open that door.

Well, no, no, because that's like snakes. Okay, they can be anywhere. They can be, they can get most places. They can get in stuff that you don't think they can get into it. But a snake will generally give himself up. Like, that guy right there gets into your shoe. You won't know. you you it'd be too late

yeah once you slip your foot in there he's doing pop well see I'm the world's worst about when you clean out shoes like most time people shake them out right I just like run my hand in there real quick and like shoot like I just try to fight your hand well that's what I try to do the old swipe you know like the swipe and grab

but like I said I don't have a lot of shoes so this isn't all I can think about I take a pair of shoes and wear it till I just bust out the sides of them then I go get me another pair but I will say that's why like I'm not a I don't I don't leave boots on the porch. That's why you gotta have a mother.

That's all I can think about right now, because when I left my house, I looked at some shoes that I've had on the porch for, we're gonna say an uncomfortable amount of time. We're not gonna tell you how. Yeah. But I looked down and said,

I need to move those inside. But now I think I'm just gonna throw them away. I wouldn't move. I wouldn't move. My first move wouldn't be inside. No, I would shake out and get them closer to where you want them to be.

Things been out there for a minute. Sometimes whenever I'm doing it, my paranoia kicks in. So like, I'll shake them out, knock them together. And then I'll put them on the ground and step on the sheet just to be sure. Man, Saturday morning in the dark,

teal hunting just got a lot more interesting. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You got to be... I used to be concerned about cotton mouth and everything else. Now I'm going to be thinking, well, what if one of them's there? Yeah, what if one of them is there? What if one of them little suckers is on the bench and the blind, and I sit on it? I mean, he's going to get me. I'll get him, but he's going to get me. Well, it won't be too bad. I mean, it really wouldn't.

It'll make you... Well, that depends on which ones get you. I just don't like the thought. Like, I'm way cooler with this one than that one that's an inch and a half long. It says it's about size your fingernail. That ain't, that ain't right. No, like that ain't. Oh, that's why I said they about two to three inches.

Yeah. Because when he rares up, when you confront him, you know, hey, that boy's bad. And when he pops you with that one, yeah. That's why that sting or splash always worked back to the old wrestling. That ain't hurt, though. Yeah. Hey, well, good on you for bringing the body, though. Well, that's what I'm saying.

That is very interesting conversation. And if you really want to have fun, what you do is you just go here, go office to office and just, you know, kind of. He brought it too close to me in the break and we almost. Yeah. Well, you know. Oh, he was, I was looking at his belly. No.

No, no. I think that's a bit. I don't know. He's just kind of flat now. Yeah, yeah. He got, he got work. over pretty good. I do like your style record double-tap.

My house, take that. That's a house. Yeah, that's the house. You and then. Oh, yeah. A couple of good hits. Yeah, you all, I will say, you only want one person telling a story. Yeah.

So you only want, when it comes down to it, you only want one side of the story to have to tell. So, I, you know, so it, it just is, it's an interesting thing, but. And I just confirmed, I will not move to. shooting. I just don't want to have to put my shoes on and worry about that. So in our mudroom, I have all the shoes, like there's a shoe rack that we keep it on. So I think, because these guys don't climb walls or nothing. These are, these are your floor walkers. If them things started climbing walls, we got issues. These are your floor walkers. So I think if you got them up off the floor, you're probably in the clear. We've got, how many years between us? 70 plus 100? That's why I like, sigh, you got stung in the bed.

It wasn't one of these guys, I don't think. A hundred and, you know. That's what I would bet size was a spider over a scorpion. The doctor said, you know, because, you know, blood tests and all that. He said, there's scorpions. Yeah. We're right around 180 to 190 years combined. Only two has happened.

That's the first one I've ever said. I feel better about it, but I don't like it. It was just like someone stuck me with a knife. Yeah. When he popped me. I thought I thought I stepped on like a. tack or something what it felt like.

Yeah, which is kind of like a wasp. I mean, you know, this time of year they get inside your house and they'll get on the floor like... You got wasp in your house? Yeah, I mean, they get in. I got lizards in my house.

Yeah, they get in. Like if you go... I hate them, but they at least, I'm not afraid of them. So like, right now, here's... Here's what, like... Thanks a gross. And this is the time of year, we all go back to the camp, right?

So this will be... And this is when wasp and all that are getting to their wintering spots, which is just, generally in walls of things. So like, what's crazy is like you go to somewhere during duck season and you turn on the heat. It's cold.

It's been cold. And you turn on the heat and the wall start vibrating because the wasp are getting warm. And then you look up and there's waltz coming out of every crease and crevice and all the thing. And then next thing, you know, you turn the heat off and you just freeze while you sleep because you don't want to have to worry about them no more. I'm going to have that. I'm going to spirit Halloween with Hunter.

Oh, yeah. I ain't going. I ain't never going. You can ask old Jared living proof. Like last year we stayed at a place and I think the walls, I turned the heat on in there. And you just are, and I said, Jared, it's about to be cold in here, buddy. Yeah, we're going to go. I went from the heat to the air.

Yeah. And it was already 30 degrees outside. I said, but I'm not going to have to worry about something dope popping me while I sleep. Like, no sir. You know. Don't leave, don't leave like sleeping bags and stuff. Oh, yeah. Rolled up.

Yeah, no. In camps, because just what you're talking about, when you walk in there, you get close to it, you're here, who. It's a weird sound. It's a humming sound that goes from low, starts getting high. Yeah, when it gets high, you know they're warm. Yeah, oh, yeah. It's time to go.

Yeah, yeah. As long as it's still that low bass deal, you're like, Y'all ain't feeling yourself yet. So real quick, I'm going to get y'all to help me with something because this is obviously one of those things you make an illustration out of. What's the spiritual application? Oh, I got the Bible verse of all Bible verses. I'm very excited.

The spiritual application. Well, you were walking in the dark, right? Walking in the dark. I was walking in the dark. You were walking in the darkness and the light is the way, buddy. Yeah. Would you have. Would you have stepped on in?

Would you have stepped on him where you walking in the light? But no, you turn the light on and you turn it. Whenever I turn the light on, it exposes the threat. There you go. So stay in the light. When you stay in the light, you can see the enemy. You can't wait for what I have for you, sir. I'm just going to go ahead and tell you.

Yeah, at one point, Jesus, he sends out 72 people, basically tells them, hey, the harvest is plentiful. Go out there. Go get it. People that listen to you, they love me, they're going to listen to you. People reject you or rejecting me. And they came back and they're like, weird, crazy stuff's happening. Oh, yeah. And they said, Lord, even the demons submit to your names.

And Jesus replied, in Luke 10, 18, and 19 is when I get excited. He replied, I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven. This is the words of Jesus. I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy, nothing will harm you. That's, there it is. I mean, there it is. We got the authority of the Lord.

Figuratively, literally, we, we're going to take a house shoe. That's what I'm saying. The demons, to Satan, anything that comes our way. Especially that thing. I'm just glad to know Jesus put them in the same category. I kind of think of. Well, that's what I'm saying. Hey, the people that handle snakes and all that,

that's the first they used for doing that. Oh, yeah, yeah. I know you're talking about you. You see what I'm saying? Yeah. They didn't, they didn't translate that. Right. I much prefer the way this was handled.

Yeah. If you'd have brought a live one in here? No. Yeah. I mean, as long as he would have been in confinement, we'd have been okay. No, I'm not a. You ought to have had this podcast. Look, look.

I got worms to sell, baby. I am not a, hey, let me try to, you know, safely collect this. I'll kill it. I'm just going, look. MyPillow.com slash duck slippers. I mean, I fancy myself a conservationist and a naturalist, but once you trespass, we got a problem. I'm not trying to trespass on you. You stay where you stay and we're fine.

But when you trespass, we got a problem. Before we go, though, do you have one of those cameras in your living room? No. Oh, dang. I would have liked to see you take it. I've been thinking. Luke 10, 19. Luke 10 19.

Step on the snakes and the... I got to go read that. Read all Luke 10. It's a good one. Oh, yeah, yeah. Jesus sending people out. The snakes and the scorpion. And he says, if I got your back,

ain't nothing going to stop you. Even what might be the grossest and scariest thing you can come up with was just snakes and scorpions. Oh, yeah. Hey, make sure you let your little light shine, baby. If you walk in the dark, you get like Rucker. You get popped by. You get dope pop.

Oh, I got popped by many of things walking in the dark over my years. Scorpion, probably the friendly. Scorpy is the friendliest. Jesus love you and so do we. Amen. We love you guys. Have a beautiful week. Yeah, and I'm not done studying this guy yet.

So we'll see y'all next time. You can keep him if you want to. No, I don't want to keep. We'll see y'all next time. Hang out of here. I'm going on.