Duck Call Room - Uncle Si Skipped Prom for a Wild Night With His Parents

Episode Date: May 12, 2026

Uncle Si skipped prom for an unusually raucous but memorable night at home with his parents, leading to him sleepwalking straight through his sister’s goodnight kiss to sprint down the highway in nothing but his underwear. Godwin nearly misses the episode completely after Hunter’s autocorrect disaster sends him the wrong recording day, while John-David considers launching a brand-new career that could seriously test his intestinal fortitude. Plus, Martin admits he’d gladly accept an invitation to go storm chasing across the Great Plains if anybody’s brave enough to take him along. Duck Call Room episode #551 is sponsored by: https://myphdweightloss.com — Find out how Godwin is losing weight! Visit the website or call 864-644-1900 and mention "Godwin" to get 2 weeks free in the program! https://trybeef.com/duck — Get 10% off your first TriTails box straight from their ranch to your door. https://fastgrowingtrees.com/duck — Get 20% their first purchase when using the code DUCK at checkout. https://helixsleep.com/duck — Get 27% off sitewide all through May. Make sure you enter our show name after checkout so they know we sent you! - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Welcome back to the duck call room Ladies gentlemen We're a chair shy because Hunter screwed up Boy, you told us to get into the intro quicker Yeah, you told us in the first 15 seconds We had a hook so I threw the hook out there Hunter made a huge mistake everybody Stay tuned to find out what

And then blamed it on spell check I mean I blamed spell check But it was probably my dumb brain Yeah there you guys How are you? That's a good way to save face with everybody else in here. We wasn't going to throw you under the bus.

And they're not going to watch this, so it's all good. P.H. Weight Loss doesn't work so good guy when you can't even see him. And he'll be here Tuesday. Yeah. Problem is, today's called Thursday, Hunter. Yeah. Nothing.

My mistake. It's all good, you just. I texted him on a Tuesday, so I think I texted Tuesday. You texted him on Taco Tuesday. That's the problem. Yeah. All right. It's just the three of us today because you've already heard why.

That's what's here. Yeah, we're fired up about it, I guess, supposedly. I'm fired up. I've also decided I'm going to start a new career. What? I'm going to take my Instagram and go to gas stations and review their food. Okay. I feel like everybody was born with a gift.

Okay. I know gas station food better than most humans. So are you going to like do this pro bono, like on your own, or are you going to have gas stations pay you to come try their food? or if they would like me to pay I'm down yeah but no I was just gonna I mean I'm already eating gas station food 75% of my life anyway

so why not you know what's the rating scheme on I think we're gonna go with stars stars one to five stars oh it could be brought to you by dude wipes another avenue sell look and say I'm always thinking of avenues to sell something that meat pie at the USA travel plaza

oh that's what you should rate it in is what you should do is you should rate it And you got to use dude wipes. That's a bad thing, man. Dude wipes are great. Got to use them. I choose to use them.

I don't know if I got to. Well, you use a beday. What are you doing that you got a, well, that's a good point. They're cozy. What can I say? I'm going to get you on the bidet one day. And they make it cool. And they're biodegradable.

So, you know, there you go. Like when nature calls. Dude, bad. Well, I don't know. I'm just saying when nature calls. It's a good point. A lot of times we don't have a toilet doing what we do. So, you know.

Anyways. You got to have something that travels with you. Gas station foods. There you go. That's going to be my next career. Okay. Like the gai theory of gas stations. So diners drives in and dives,

except it's just called gas stations. We probably need something catchier. Yeah. And I need better hair. On the road again? Oh, that's good. I don't know. Then you don't even, yeah.

You know, I like it. I think it's going to be big. There you go. Probably won't even do it, but I've been thinking about it. What are you going to do for your next career? Hit the button. He guard you. The next career's a gar?

No, he guard you. No, he, he, a gar. What? Whatever I do. It'll be a gar. I doubt that. Pretty much everything you've done for the last 10 years has been a gold mine.

Everything's a strong term. There's a couple I can think of. It didn't quite work out. Some of those weren't his fault. Oh, they were not his fault. The tea cup should have been a gold mine. Yeah. Instead, we legitimately have a full mine full of them.

Yeah, but we sold a bunch of them too. So we sold way more than we got left. So, teacups. That was put to good use. Yeah, they still are. They're still being put to good use. Where are they? Everywhere.

It's a way easier to question the answer where they're not. I'd say the White House maybe, but there's probably one there. There's probably some. There's probably a sign Silas Robertson autograph. Oh, that's what we need to do. And, uh-oh. Okay, I'm all theirs. What?

Y'all commander needs a ballroom. A ballroom? Yeah. Why would we need a ballroom? Hey, why not? Well, we got three conference rooms, so. No, no. Every time I come in here, the conference room changes again.

And there's always new people. There's always new people. We need a dance hall. A dance hall. Oh, you're trying to go boot scoot and boogie. Oh, yeah. Okay, I got you. Bingham McMillan.

He's got some pretty fantastic moves. Oh, breakdancing McMillan. Yeah. What are we doing here? I would like a ballroom, but I don't think it makes sense for a Duck Commander event room. You never know. You never know? He's right.

You never? Hey, they're doing field trips now at Duck Commander. We could even, hey, we could even have dancing with the stars in. it. We have a museum with that, bro. I know it. It was great. Would you go on Dancing with the Stars?

Yes, I did. I wanted to watch the Sadie. Yeah, that, but like if they called you and like, hey, will you come be on Dancing with the Stars at the ripe old age of 78? No? No.

Why not? If they had done it in my teenage years, you ought to have been there. Bails on. Friend, TV wasn't around. Also, you weren't a star exactly in your TV. I'm always been a star

I just hadn't been found yet haven't been discovered I just hadn't been discovered there you go diamond no no duck commander you duck commander does what's it called

what field trips hey Willie hey Willie hey don't don't sell the ballroom short Willie's pretty good on his feet I don't think nobody's coming to see y'all dance oh no hey yes they would Huh?

Can't get to the church. Oh, what are you talking about? What are you going to do, roll out there on your scooter? Baby. Burn rubber in the middle of the dance floor. Yeah, baby. It would be something new. We're going to have to pump fresh oxygen into that, rascal, if you get out of it.

Hey, oxygen is, you know, it's bad. Don't they pump oxygen like into casinos in Vegas? Yeah, to keep you awake, baby. Yeah, keep you awake. Heck, yeah. So could we get, like, one of those just for in here so you don't have to bring your machine? I'm sure. except we're going to

Hunter put that on the list of things to think about it'd probably bring the whole thing up everybody had fresh oxygen even you honor yeah and then we'd have Godwin here we'd all have more oxygen hey we'd all have a buzz going you can get a buzz off of oxygen

well sure as you can son that's why you've been carrying that thing around for the last three years you think I carried my own living is it a buzz or you just get brought up to normal and you're so not normal That being back to normal feels like a bus. It might not to need the oxygen machine.

Yeah, what you got going over here? I woke up Sunday and I'd been attacked by the outdoors apparently in my sleep. Oh, okay. I kind of been hacking ever since. I got you. Hmm, that's interesting. Yeah, something got me over in Texas. Something was blooming that don't bloom here.

Yeah. And I sneezed no less than 200 times. I mowed a little bit. My wife goes on that. What? he'll go forever and then just ask you'll start yeah i knew when my eyes got to water and at that at that nascar track i said rutro we we got probably i mean i wasn't so happy i was crying those ribs were good but they wasn't that good um and then yeah they got swollen and i was

like oh it goes on and on and on sneezing don't oh once i sneeze i sneezed i try to scare because i'll come up my hundred say quit that it ain't a hiccups bro Yeah, but hey, thought it might work. I mean, it was worth a shot. I woke you up. I know that. I screamed at her. It woke her up?

Yeah. Oh, yeah. I would think so. I just don't know. I didn't do it nice. I screamed. What'd y'all get, hey, we got Mother's Day.

When's this air next Tuesday? The Mother's Day, Willa Air. What did y'all get you? Did you get Christine something for Mother's Day? Yeah, I told her the checkbook. Throwed a checkbook. Did you get Alice and something? Yeah, I throw her the check.

Oh, it's what you want. See if it works. Find out what age that starts working. No, I've already done that. I'll let you know if it's 37. What did you get? Oh, you did it. Oh, you did it house.

We did it house. Yeah, you're good for at least Mother's Day birthday. We had a bunch of cheap junk in it. Oh, we got some nice stuff. What you get? Premium. What kind of stove you got? We got marble about that thick all over the kitchen.

Yeah. Man, what was a lot of. Marble to match it. It took four men to bring it in to set it down. Hold on. That man went with marble to match his teeth, son. I'm serious. Yeah.

What kind of appliances you got? I'm in the appliance market and I can't figure it out. Do you buy a new stove or do you use your old one? Lord, I hope if they cut it the whole. All right, not only did I get a new stove. Yeah. I got a new microwave and oven. Okay.

What did you go with? What brand? Do you know? I have no idea. My wife done all that. Did all that. Oh, man. But you went gas, huh?

on everything. You got like the Dias and electric. Industrial? Huh? Well, it's real nice. I just put that way. I like that.

Because it goes about, you know, halfway up the wall. Okay. Biggin. What kind of microwave you get? I don't know. It's just regular?

Like it has a door? No, because she's, yeah. Anything technical? Yeah. Okay. Christine's got to do it.

Oh, did you get one of them that you push a button and it comes out of the cabinet and then you sit your food down in it. close it again. No, no, this is just real nice.

Is that what you're getting? I don't know. I'm constantly, I got friends that's got that way. All the cabinets in the house had to be redone. Oh, yeah. Because the rest of them were molded. Yeah, so they're gone. We're all of them out.

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give you a diary. You have to, if you bite it, you got to write it. So. That's awesome, Gobbin. And we all know what worked once before doesn't always work again because your body fights weight loss every step of the way when it's under stress, right? And so quick fixes like GOP1 drugs, they can work, but they don't always address what's causing the problem in the first place. PhD weight loss works with you to develop a plan that works with your body and focuses on restoring your metabolism so your body stops fighting you. The goal isn't to lose weight once. It's to never have to start over again. And right now you can call Ph.D. Weight Loss and mention. Godwin.

You'll get two free weeks in the program and they'll pay for your food. That's a $1,500 value completely free. Call 864-644-1900 and say, Go on. Again, that's 864-644-1900 or visit my PhD weightloss.com. Hey, do you feel better? Because they say living in mold, you feel like trash. Do you feel better?

My wife said that. She said that's the reason. I'm feeling better. And I was well, darling, that and, you know, just, because I don't use my CPAP anymore. At all? I have, no. Really?

Praise me. Oh, I'm serious. I said, hey, he's been exercising. He kept waking me up at night. Y'all, I would go to bed with it set on two. Uh-huh. Well, I'd wake it up, and it would be seven. Oh, hold on, hold on, hold on.

Is that, I don't know how CPAPs work. Does that mean it's just. really pumping it to you? What are you talking about? Hold on. Who's changing it? Who's changing it? Hey, it would wake me up. Who's changing it?

The stupid machine. It changes itself? It changes itself. He says seven, like having a leaf blower on your face. Well, no, it is. It's like somebody's walked in on you and cranked it up. Oh, I'll wake up in the middle of night, and I said, what in the crap. That's why you always felt like you was falling.

Well, no, no. It's a little. So finally I was just take it and put it on top of my head. I'd lay there and go back to sleep. I don't think that does anything. Well, I just got where I finally just took it off and turned it off and said, hey, screw this. Yeah. You know what I'm going to tell me I snore too much now, but I don't.

I don't snore that I don't feel like I do. My sleep tracker doesn't say. They tell me I snore, but I know I did. But they said that my sleep tracker says there's nothing to be worried. about with all my stats and everything. You look like you snore. Well, I come from my... But you look like you...

Oh, they said I saw some logs. Oh, that rascal, I have... I was... You probably make all stuff too. I'll tell you how bad it is. We went to Kansas up there with Barrett. Mm-hmm. Well, hey, I got it in the room,

and the first time Phil said, he says, hey, get the hell out of here. Yeah. And I said, what? You know who got the pleasure of Bucking with Si? I ain't going to be able to sleep with a faith train going through the living room. This guy. Through the bedroom.

I always got, I always got bunk to a side. That's a new guy. There's worse jobs. Oh, hey, they banned me. Yeah. I had to stay in the living room in a recliner. Sometimes. But we had our own room a lot of time.

I got a buddy that snores like that. And he used to live with me in college. You know, surprisingly, size problem for me was not the snoring. I mean, it was bad, but I could eventually, he was so consistent, I could get it timed and I could go to sleep. My man pee's a lot during the middle of the night. I get up quite all. He's very well hydrated. And his night vision must not be great because he always got to flip a light on to see.

And I was like, would you quit going to the bathroom? Like, man. I don't remember where it was. We went humped somewhere. And just. I flipped the life. I thought it was in the bathroom. I was in another bedroom.

Had you peed yet? No, the guy said, what you want? I said, wrong room, dude. Yeah, my bad. Oh, that's funny. Oh, man. I'm always sleepwalk. No, that's not good.

No, no, because look, hey, my older sister was taking a guy in college football player. Oh, boy. They come, they come at the door and he was fixing to kiss her good night. Well, I just shoved him out of the way and walk past him in my underwear. He yelled at me. When he yelled at me, I took off running. Oh, praise God. Look, look, you're just, he caught me.

I run about three, five, five hundred, three to five hundred yards down the highway. Yes. In your underwear? In my underwear. Yes. Look, and I never woke up. Yes. I know.

They told me about the next. day. Gina said, do you know you interrupted me and my boyfriend? I said, what are you telling? He was fixing to kiss with a good night. You just shoved him out of the way. He liked to fell off the porch when they've done it. Have you ever seen the movie Stepbrothers?

I have a question. Be for a similar to a plot, I've seen. Did you, you were just messing with him, right? No. You knew what you were doing. Oh, sleep fog. Yeah, I'm going to break them out. No, they won't.

They, you know, they brought, he brought me back to the house, yo. put me back in bed and they told me about the next time i seen him you know what i'd give for watching sigh running his whitey-tides down the road at the age of 15 or whatever he was you know what i'd give to see him do it at the age of 78 oh we had more i don't want him to die if he wants to go scooting down the road i'm cool with judy judy's going to college and she's studying you become a nurse yeah okay so every time we had any kind of little scratch or cut or whatever she's had the doctorate. There you go.

So we got sick of it. There's worse things in life. No, no. So we got sick of it. She was always, you know, so Tommy said, I got something for her. He went outside and caught him a grass snake, a little green one. Mm-hmm. And he wrapped around his fingers.

And when he squeezed it, it turned that green snake, yellow, blue, black. Just, it made it look like a bad bruise. And we was always kind of around boxing. So we was boxing, you know, and Tommy swaying it, Phil and fell duck. And Tommy act like he hit the wall, you know.

Yeah. He hit it with his hand like this. Yeah. You know, when it hit, and went, go, get out. I broke it. I broke it.

I broke it, you know. Well, here comes Judy. You know. He's so happy with what they did. No. 70 years ago to his poor sister. No, no, because look, she grabbed his hand like this and said, oh, my goodness, I think you did break it.

You know, you broke your fingers and the wrist, y'all. About that time, he opened his finger where the snake's head come out. She fainted. Oh, then she got a concussion. That ain't right. What is wrong with the Robertsons? That ain't right, man. It was funny.

snakes are never funny oh they are well that was funny that's before he was terrified of it wasn't funny I don't like him anyway yeah that's before he was that's the Robertson way Willie threw a snake in the shower with Corey a real one yeah oh that's good no it's not yeah that's fun man watch them dance that's a day Corey's still mad about it I said why did you do that you know it's funny she was running snake was running and they're both scared of each other.

That would have been the end. I'd have been like, nope. So if Allison walk in a night, throw a snake on you, what happens? Oh, will it? We're in the shower. You don't say. Yeah, that's not what you were talking about? Yeah, we just talk about it.

I did used to do this thing early on in my marriage that I thought was hilarious with a bucket of ice water. Yeah, that's hateful. You're in the shower. I'd rather throw it. He wore him right back on. I know, but throw ten snakes on me rather than a cold plunge in the middle of a hot shower. Like, throw ten snakes in there. I'll be a right.

I'll figure that out. That's a fun joke. I need to do that to my kids. You do that to Carter. He's going to beat the snot out of you. No, he'll think it's funny after a couple of them. Although I am banned from jokes.

He knocks you out. He'll think he's fun. They just recorded if you. I'm banned from jokes at our house, though, because Carter says I'm no good at them. You're not even dinner party funny at home? I'm not even, I'm just, nope, ban from jokes. Every day I'll say something. He's like, dad, I told you you were banned from jokes.

And I'm like, well, technically I make the rules. Yeah. Well, some people can tell them and some people can't. Yeah, some people got the gift of delivery. That's right. That's right. There you are. There he is right there.

Some people can't deliver even a simple text message that says Thursday. I had a buddy in house. It is. It's a tough. Life is tough. That boy can tell so many stories. and he could do it are you talking about

he could do it for a week and never repeat himself you talking about yourself no I repeat himself sir yeah he does you were the second best storyteller in your high school no I was one of the best

but I mean that boy could hold his own though that boy could hold his own what's he doing now what's he doing now I think he passed away oh thank Mike Alexander I didn't mean to go down that road

whoops he was a good guy Martin we'll take a quick ad break no I'm just saying for the class of 1956 odds are pretty high are they what what year did you graduate 66 66

okay so not as high as 56 56 it's not a 56 problem all right look springtime is here it's warming up you know what that means that means more outside cooking and y'all know we love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Triedells beef makes such a good product, ain't it good? It's so good. Our friend, Sall Robertson, would say, buy on the grill.

Look, before we got Triedells, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes to them. But with Triedales beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Triedales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. There are a fifth just, generation American ranch. So they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I tell you what,

when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out try tails beef i know in size case christine loves it which is just a uh she doesn't eat she and a big meat easier folks yeah just go to try beef dot com slash that's try beef dot com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak i had to leave my last half of my senior year and go to another high school why rezoned you move mom dad moved oh okay you didn't get expelled or nothing i was hoping for that story. Okay.

Like, you're out, moving on. So they moved. That's what, why'd y'all move? Why'd y'all move? Daddy job.

Got a new job. Where'd you finish high school then? And Gonzales, Louisiana. Oh, you went down south. My prom night consisted of it. I drank a quarter of

of Jack Daniels. Uh-huh. At your prom? Bombed. Uh-huh. That was it. Is that the house with mom and dad? Offstairs.

Oh, hold. Hold on. That was my high school prom. Where is the therapist? Because they didn't know anybody. Yeah, we need Emily back for this one. You didn't know anybody for your senior prom,

so you stayed at home with your parents. With your parents. With mom and dad. Mom and dad had a good time. They had a hoot. What if he get polluted? Why was I not alive in 1966? Why are we just now thinking?

it out about guys. Hey, look, around the Robertson House. Did y'all leave and go to Waffle House? Did y'all even go to Waffle House? I was just curious. You need that eye therapy thing from your senior prom. I need you to watch. We got some trauma we need to work out from your senior prom. It don't sound like trauma. He sounds like he enjoyed it. Hey, hey. Oh, I had a good time. See, I don't, I don't think there was no trauma. Mom and dad had a better time. I had. What did y'all do? Watch TV or movies? I don't remember.

Play dominole. They was laughing the whole time. I know that. Yeah. Man, did anybody come to prom, will you? No. No, I was just curious. I didn't know if it was just a...

But you wouldn't have been the... So it would have been... Jan would have been there. Well, no old Jan was there. Because y'all were the last two in the house, right? Me, Mom and Jan. Yeah. Yeah.

You're... Are you older than Jan? Yeah. Oh, I don't know. Yeah, but he's the baby boy. She's the... I'm the baby boy. She's the baby girl.

She's the baby baby. I thought you were younger than jazz. So what did you do in Gonzalez? Did you like living in Gonzalez? I guess you were only there for a few months. Then you come back to pack or something? Yeah. Oh, okay.

What? Two in the high, three months? Yeah. It's the most. And then so you're a graduate of the Gonzalez High School, whatever they are. Yeah. I don't even remember what you all either. You don't even know your height?

Well, no, no. Look, I only, look, I only, I just got a, matter of fact, I just got a letter in the mail, the other day to come to the union. Oh, 66. What, y'all are 60 years. Yeah, 60-some years. 60-year reunion.

I'm going with you. Let's go. I didn't even go. I threw it away. What's he going to do? Be like, hey, you guys remember prom when I got drunk with my mom and dad? Hey, yes. Hey, look, I didn't know but one man, one kid at school.

And I don't even remember his name. But we just missed a chance for the 60-year high school reunion. Is it East Descension? that where you went? East ascension? Is that where you went? That's the only high school in Gonzales. Yeah.

That's it. East ascension. What are they? The pirates or something? Spartan. Spartan. Spartan. We got to come up with you.

See, I had to leave right in the whole. No. No. That would suck. We should. It is. It sucked. But we should have gone to your reunion.

No, we should. No. Yeah. No. I don't want to do it if there's been New York, North Carolina. North Carolina. Of you. Yeah.

Yeah. But hey, but four of a guy. that I went to class with at Vivian. Uh-huh. They come down because the guy, he had bought himself a 1996 Chabelle,

Chevalet Chival. Two-tone blue and blue and another color with a 396 motor in it. Mm-hmm. So we spent the night burning the tires off of that sucker.

Down in Gonzales. Down in Gonzales. It was the Cajun-Greece lightning right there. That was fun because, look, They should make that move. The other three had drove it. The other three had drove it.

Yeah, it's called the water boy. And hey, they had been raw hiding at y'all. So when they said, okay, sure, son. You know, I was driving. I was going to drive it, right. Yeah. You know, until I was pulled up at a stop sign at a red light. And a guy pulled up beside me and started ripping his engine up.

Uh-oh. Popped the clutch, burn rubber a little bit. Uh-huh. Give him a little. You know, and my buddy that on the car, he said, you're not going to take that, right? Well, they wasn't paying attention, you know. I wasn't going to take it.

So I let him start, and he got a little bit of heavy. Then, hey, I'm sideways all through five gears. Because every time I'd snatch a get another gear, I'd turn. Mottner hits another car. Yeah, hit it again, slam it, and then Mottner hit him going the other way. You were slam. And I said, is that okay? Yeah.

He says, okay. Okay. That thing was right, was run. And so what, you retreated and went back to tech? Oh. You come back to tech as soon as that was over with you? Back to the Louisiana. Yeah, Mama, that was a good, that was a good time too.

When my mother called me and said, you're going to college. And I said, no, ain't? She said, oh, yeah, you are. I said, no, ain't? Yeah. Oh, yeah. And I said, hey, look, you and Daddy work too hard for your money. Don't waste it.

Because all I'm going to do is party. And she said, well, have a big one, have a good one. She said, because you're going to college. And I said, why? She said, because when you're 40 years old and digging dishes for a living, you can't say mom and dad didn't give you the opportunity to go to college. I don't want you to say, boy, Fade, I'm giving me that chat. Yeah.

What were you doing at 40? Huh? Oh, you're still in the military at 40. Yeah. Yep. He was a something. But, you know, I tried to talk right of it. And she said no.

So when I went, hey. I figured you would have thrived down south in a town like Gonzalez or something. I actually figured that. Well, no, I didn't have a good time. Yeah, yeah. You just hated not being with your buddies. Wasn't nobody there. Okay, yeah.

He couldn't bother Phil and Kay. Yeah, he couldn't be the third wheel anymore. Man belonged as the third wheel. Yeah, he ended up with just him and his mom and his daddy and Jan. Well, I was so used to being, you know. Mm-hmm. You know, when the school bus would pull up in the morning at Vivian, yeah.

Manfield would get off and then all the kids would come up and say, okay, you know, what did you do it for, you know, Saturday and Sunday? Because we was always fishing, hunting, doing something. You know, picking, uh, grind his pecans. Stealing. He had a pecan orchard and, hey, we'd pick us 100 pounds and go sell it. Thievery. Yeah.

All of them. What did your dad do for a living? What did he get transferred? He was oil field. He was a driller. Drill rig. Yeah. I'm not in oil.

Is there a lot of oil down there? Oil all over the earth, which is. He did. All of them, I think he hit like five that actually had oil down there. The rest of them was gas, gas well. Yeah. I figured it. His gas pocket, cap it.

You know, the United States has got gas. gas wells kept in every state. They were drilling for oil as soon as they hit those gas, cap it, move on to the next site. Hey! Ladies and gentlemen. How did you make it? Picking a Galwyn.

Johnny Godwin, the mad. Hey, the man. The incredible shrinking man. The incredible shrinking man. Hey, you're looking good there, young man. Gawin, come slide over in this chair. Yeah. You really are.

Hey, really is looking good. We got about 15, 20 minutes. Hey, we'll run you back. Yeah. We're running back on Monday, too. But go ahead and sit down since you here. Oh, hey. No, one, I ain't saying you, the woman don't let you out anymore.

Oh. He's too busy. She's too busy keeping it home. Too much canoodling. Yeah. Too much man. No, not enough man, I think. Oh, no.

It's too much man. You had any interesting guests lately, Gawin? No. Anything happening? Ain't had to pull no hook out of nobody. No, no. You hear that people that have recently been with Goblin? You're not interested.

I'm just kidding. No, but the beauty of that. Not interesting, but not. Yeah, nothing crazy happened. Nobody fell out of the boat. What's the biggest one you called here, Lizzie? What's the biggest one you called Leith? Biggest one I called 220.

Two, 20. He called, uh, he judged. Was it 220? Yeah, 225. I remember when you would go fishing? Yep. I remember the day, I remember the day that boy stepped me.

Oh. 18 to 1. Some people can catch him. Hey, and I got the same bait, the same rod, the same line, the same reel. Sounds like user error. I'm under him. His bait is here, and I'm under it. And hey, Big Cropy hits his and a reel mine in.

Throw it back out again. Hey, same thing. Riggled it in. One hits his. A drill and mine slower you. Is that how it happened, got one? I caught one. He caught 18.

in a row on me. He got mad, throw his rod down. I can't believe it. He's reeling too fast. He's really too fast. I know I wasn't. Okay.

Nope. I love being outside. I love getting the boys out there. And one of the funest things now is that we're partner with fast growing trees so we can add all kinds of stuff to our yard. We can nerd out and we can grow whatever we want to because fast growing trees is America's largest and most trusted online nursery with thousands of trees and plants.

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They're doing fine. I did what they said and it's like it works. Right now they have great deals on spring planting essentials up to half off on select plants. And listeners to our show get 20% off their first purchase when using the code. Don't! At checkout. That's an additional 20% off better plants and better growing at fast growing trees. Dot using the code at checkout fastgrowing trees.com code.

Now's the perfect time to plant. Let's grow together. Use. Don't. To save today offers valid for a limited time. terms and conditions may apply. Gobwin, how them grandkids doing good? Good, doing good.

Yeah, grandkids doing great. Gobwin, everybody at Texas Motor Speedway told me to tell you, hello. Can we start that a baby? There. Yeah, I was just there. Line fee, boys. I told everybody, I said, I mean, I know we're having a good time. I said, but y'all need to come to one of these with Gobin.

Yeah. And they said, why is that? I said, because he walk around and he can tell you everything's going on around here. See me, I did walk around here, look around. I don't really know. I don't really know nothing that's going on. And I ain't got a clue what's going on. I watched it.

It's a good thing you worked there, though, because they've given out free custard everywhere you look. I know that ain't on your plant. No. I know that ain't on your plans. Oh, it don't bother me no more. Except for I could still eat 18 pecan pies in one sitting right now. That's the one you miss.

That's the one I miss. Mama used to make some good. There you go. Big old cup of pot, well, pot of coffee and... Peacamp pie. Oh, I'd eat them all at one. And women over at Longlea plantation makes them good pecan pie. Where's that at?

Over Longley. Mississippi. Oh, I saw, hey, I don't know. You may need to check on your friends down there in South Mississippi. The big town of Purvis, Mississippi, got hit last night by tornado. The Holmes is doing all right. They're doing all right. Dr. Dean's doing all right.

Ain't he from Holmes of Hope or Purvis, I mean? I don't know about Dr. Deans. Yeah, you may want to check on. They really is? They hit? Yeah, they got hit by a tornado last night, 100%. Wow. So our folks of Mississippi, I know we got a lot of y'all that have supported us and stuff through the years now that I think about it.

Yeah, hey, we're praying for you guys, man. That was, you know me, I'm a nerd. I watch all the storm chasers. I kind of want to do it one time, but I'm also mildly terrified. You want a storm chase? Yeah, I really want to go see a tornado like, I want to see one of those tornadoes like out in like Nebraska. You know, just like, I'm saying. I'm saying that all the way to odds.

Well, it's flatter and a flitter out there. You can see them from afar. Just rip the movie. You ain't got to be close. No, that's ripping up like a wheat field. You don't want to sit up close. Well, that's ripping up like a wheat field. What about?

But the next thing you know, it's ripping up cows. Well, I mean, they're... Hey, let me tell you what happens. As long as it ain't messing with a human, I'm cool, man. I don't like it when people, you know... Close to where we hunted the other day, they had softball size hail. And it was tearing up cars. Is your camper up there?

Windshield. It was, it stopped. It didn't get there. Yeah, I wouldn't look. Oh, wow. It was stopped like half a mile, just a line through, but everybody's houses got tarps on them and. There's a town.

Just tore a plumb off the houses. Looks like somebody comes through there with a shotgun. There's a town in Texas. Down there below college station somewhere. Okay. more comes through there. Galvest. And look, the whole town.

That tornado picked the whole town up tore everything, houses, pipes, all it was left was the slabs. Really? When was this? Hey, look, it yanked the pipes out of the concrete. Good, Gary.

When? Hey, there's somewhere down there below college stations somewhere. Oh, but when? When? He's looking for footage. That was what in the 20s? Oh, no. Yeah.

I would be black and white. Hey, no, no. Because, hey, you know. My daughter, we would. She drove through their shoulders. Yeah. Yeah. It was.

Just left it there? It, you tried it. Twins. Yeah. They didn't put nothing back on top. But it was. The Waco tornado. It was.

It was. insane just to see it. Waco. I imagine. All you could see was, hey, was concrete slabs with the town and down the roads and all that. In that's crazy. That was one

come through Kansas City. One of my fishing buddies just got his boat out of his storage. It was like a storage unit and it tore that place up. Storage unit? Yeah, the storage unit and it was like his boat if he hadn't he left a day early if he hadn't

left a day early his boat would have been in there would have been gone brand new boat but there was a pop-up camper out in the grass out there and ain't him touched that's crazy ain't it never touched they're some town's same thing it hit about like 10 houses in a row and then there was a house and it skipped it. It just lift it up, went by it. It hit back, you'll start tearing it up behind it.

Crazy. But it did do the ten houses in front of that one. What gets me was, when you see what one of them can do, we live in crackerjack boxes.

Oh yeah. No, they're tearing it up now. I mean, hey, you're talking about when stuff starts ripping and stuff out of concrete. Out of concrete. It makes you want to build a basement. Hey, I'll go underground.

It'll make you go in. It'll turn mold. I don't understand basements. No. I've been in one one time and it freaked me out. Really? Basement? I got one at the church.

Yeah. That's the one you were in? No, I forget about that one. That's the most flooded piece of property. Yeah, that's always under water. We can't dig a hole in Louisiana. Yeah. Yeah.

The basement at WFR church has been the flooded probably 50 times. I'll tell you just put a plug in it and call it to Baptistry. Well, because they got a cool group that meets down there on Wednesdays called the basement. Oh, Dave's part of that. Yeah, Big Dave had her every Wednesday night. Oh, is he a basement guy? Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Aquarium. Aquarium? Yeah. Hey. no. Talking around the doors and making an aquarium. Cock that thing up, boys. That's what I said.

Well, you do a Baptist tree. He's going down. That's it. Be waiting around. Oh, you're talking about something interesting. I do. Fish and come from an interesting. Let me show you.

Well, word did you say? I have to give us to a hunter. Oh, and he's got a picture of it. No, I got a video. Oh, he's got a video. What word did he say that? He said, oh, you was talking about something interesting. How did you not understand that?

I understood the first part that he said. He said talking about fish and... Well, fish. He said talking about fish and something interesting. I heard the same thing as you, J.D. Don't worry. I heard... That's because y'all ain't sat by this man for 20 years.

Yeah, y'all need to learn goblin. Yeah. Y'all got to learn... You got to speak goblin. Y'all need to sit in a tiny metal building with him, shoulder to shoulder. Meem and side. Oh, that's a strapping. That's a bunch of crappies.

Fish slam. I do have some email. Go ahead. Let's get in them. We need to get to. because we haven't given a lot of relationship advice. That's what I'm going to be doing Tuesday morning. Tuesday morning.

Down on a honey hole. Ah. Where? Going high fence fishing, are you? Oh, yeah. Where are you going? Yeah, Ben Stone's going down there. Where?

Down at the, I don't know the name of the lake, but it's honeyhole. Anyway, if you need a, if you need relationship advice, we're the four people to fix all your problems. Just email us the situation you are in. and make it concise like my friend Elijah. I'd Elijah. What do I do? I like a girl,

but she says I am quote on quote. Is that a thing? Quote on quote. Unquote. He said quote unquote, unquote. It'd be quote unquote. Is it quote unquote? I don't even know what that means.

Let me start over. What do I do? I like a girl, but she says I'm quote unquote. Weird. Weird. End of email. Well, hi.

You didn't tell her. You need to tell her, hey, look, get on the bandwagon because you just don't know the fun you're missing. Yeah, tell her don't be so serious. Is it a little too on the nose if I asked Connor for his opinion? I have many. Hunter, what's your opinion on what Elijah should do? Move on from her. Really?

But was weird a good thing? Yeah, weird is a good thing. Look, normal. Maybe she sees it as a good thing. Hey, normal people suck. If she saw it as a good thing, I doubt he would. at it. Weird people are you in?

Yeah. Look at the side. Are we all weird? Yes. Willie Robertson once argued. We all are in our own way. Yeah, right. We all got to court.

Everybody's weird. We're all unique. Willie Robertson claimed he's a normal person. And I said, no, you're not. He argued with me and Corey for like a week that he's just a normal guy. I was like, you're one of the weirdest people I know. Well, no, he's not. He skins.

He's not weird. He's not weird. No, he's not normal. No. He's not known. I don't even know what normal people are like. He's my, yo,

he's my, he's my, he's a strange dude. Who's the most normal person we know? That's what I was trying to think of. Chad Creel. No. No, he's weird.

He's, he's annoyingly nice. Like, that's not normal. Like, you got to have a little savage. Just a normal. Guy.

That's a regular. Jesus. Purse. Did you just say Kurt lively? Is that your, that ain't normal? I smell. like old spice and cat piss but it'll be okay.

That's a Kurt lively line. I had a funeral mind you. That is. My favorite. You mind if I sit by you, brother? I smell like old spice and cat piss. That's Kurt quote of all time to me. I walked out.

You gotta love that boy. You gotta love that boy. I got a new male cat. He's spraying everywhere. Look, it's tax refund time and some of life's simple luxuries are things such as new mattresses. And our friends over at Helix Sleep can help you out. All you got to do is take that easy quiz, Martin. Two minutes or less. My wife and I took the super simple Helix sleep quiz and we were

matched with the Midnight Lux mattress. Look, it's firmer feeling and it's perfect for us because we sleep in our back and our backs have been through some things. Look, we've had our Helix for four years now and it's legit been the best sleep we have ever had. Our whole podcast family is sleeping on Helix, the guys are done a shame, Sadie, all of us, and I'm telling you they're the best, and they have over 20 different mattress models so you can find your perfect match. We're not the only one saying that. Helix is the most awarded mattress brand, tested and reviewed by experts like Wired and Forbes. Even my sleep tracker, I got one of those now, shows the difference.

I was blown away by how much my sleep improved with Helix. Not only do I just sleep better in general on my Helix mattress, but also notice, look, I don't wake up a back pain, headache, stiff muscles, none of that. that stuff. It molds here your body, keeps you comfortable all night so you're not tossing and turning. And if you're still not convinced, just give it a try. They have a 120-night trial and the happy with Helix Guarantee means you're going to love your new mattress as much as we love ours. Guarantee. Go to helixleep.com slash for 27% off-sitewide. That's helixleck sleep.com slash for 27% off-site wide. This offer is exclusive for duck call room listeners.

So make sure you enter our show name after checkout so that they know we see. We see. sent you helixleaksleep.com slash I ran into Kurt one time his truck had all these dents all in it I said Kurt what's up with your tailgate man he goes oh brother them trees out of Campioke

ain't got a lot of gear up he's just out there turning that certain boom boom we should probably slide Kurt in here I'm not a post to it or a segment or two also very weird and great I like how we're trying to think of a normal person we can't do it we can't

think of one. I ain't nobody. There ain't nobody. Anybody's normal. I feel like there's got to be one person that we know. That's just a normal dude. That's just a regular frigging guy. Nope.

I feel like if there's no such thing. If this girl feels the need to point it out, she might not be that good of a person. Oh. Elijah, run. Why do you like a person that's calling you weird? Unless it's in a cool like, hey, you're weird and I like that. Yeah, you got to find a girl to med. That's your freak.

What did you just say? But God said amen, brother. That's right. Nobody's normal. That's what? Yeah, I don't. Who's the most normal person we know? I'm drawing a blank, man.

I'm telling you, they're going to buy it that way. Maybe, I mean, owls not super weird, is he? Ow. He does have an arm tattoo. He has a tattoo that says, Al. Yeah, that he did himself. Hold on. You just said, hold on.

You said, we said, who's the most normal person we know? And Martin came up with the only person I know that has a lifetime movie about their life. I know. Well, I'm saying now. Not, not preview. No, it doesn't matter. That counts. Oh, I was talking about this stage.

Once you have a lifetime movie about you, normal's out. Yeah, I was thinking of this. Hey, when's that come out? I don't know. No. Oh, soon. Al's weird. He's a weirdo.

What? Jet might be the most normal. one of all of them. No, he craps too much. Yeah. And he plays a World of Warcraft still. What a World Warcraft was cool. Leroy Jenkins.

Oh, no, look. Hey, look, here's why Al is weird. That's all he did once he got done with a D.E. Al's got a bunch of friends that let Al's father take his belt off and whip their butt royally. Yeah. Is Jeff Smith normal? No.

No, he's a weird old too. Yeah, he's got a... Yeah, he's got a... Maybe Lane. No, that boy's weird, too. He's a killer, I know that. Yeah, I'm nothing. I got nothing.

What? I'm trying to think of like a local... Hey, fuck the reason you got nothing. They don't exist. Yeah. Like a local... Everybody's... Baptist preacher that might be normal.

I don't know normal people. How dare you... I don't think you can be from Washed off... How dare you... to me with that word i don't think you can be normal from this whole parish yeah i don't know i don't think there's anybody there might not be as paul a normal no no no no no i want as crazy as a bedboat she's a little feisty i love her death but hey she's nuts too is brittany normal are you no you're joking right you know her that's another woman i loved her death okay she

ain't normal either. Well, what's this girl going to do if she can't have? Somebody that's not weird. Hold it. What about your wife? Yeah, what about your wife? I mean, Allison is. She might be normal.

Allison is. Nah. There's a side to her that I don't know. Oh, okay. No, she's a freaking weirdo. Yeah. That's that only child stuff. Yeah, she is only.

So you can't be normal if you're normal. That's one of the things that you do. Impala's the only child. You start to say, you start say, yeah, I knew you say. No. I was the only child. No, when you've introduced me to four people that are your sister.

Well, my part of a big thing. He said I was an only child. I know three of guys. In my family. Oh. I got two sisters from daddy's side and two brothers from, no, three sisters from daddy. I said, I knew I knew you had three sisters. Two brothers from mama's side.

All right, I do have one more email. I'm just still, now I'm stuck on trying to find the normal person. What about Bigfoot? Who? True? Yeah. No, he's not. He wears, have you seen his feet?

Oh, yeah, his name is Bigfoot. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. What's this girl going to do when she can't find nobody that's not weird? That's normal? Actually, you know what? Whenever I was at Allison's high school reunion, I was miserable because I was like,

look at all these normal human beings. Yeah. They all went to Bird High School, a bunch of normal losers. Bird High School. Bird. I loved my chance to take a shot at the town of Shreveport. They're not normal. They're interstate's fixed, though.

All right, Chase, oh, I actually wasn't going to use your name, Chase, but you wrote it and you're going to wear this one, buddy. Okay, Chase. I'm not going to say where you're from, but you're six hours from a city is what we'll say. Six hours from a city. He's 20 years old, so he's getting to the point in life. where he, I need to start being picky with my woman choices. Oh. Hmm.

Yeah. That's a good choice. So my question involves my best buddy's cousin. My best buddy's cousin. I married a good friend's cousin. And I think she's a female. Yes. Yeah.

All right. I've known her for a while and have always gotten along great. Okay. Her personality fits mine almost perfectly. And she shares. Almost. And she shares my Christian. values.

If you haven't been picky about your women, I got some, I got some questions about your theology, my friend. As a guy who also went through the stage where he was not picky with his women, I know that at that point, I, here we go, though. Okay. This is where you're, you're, I was tried down a different path. This is about to get weird. All right.

All right, then. So personality fits perfect, shares values. Mm-hmm. Don't get me wrong. She's not ugly. Okay. She's not ugly I've never emailed this in

but she just isn't my physical type Uh oh Hmm She's been wanting to be I'm not I'm not touching this Right Martin She's been wanting to be friends for months now

And he's just got to been putting it off But he can't deny Old shallow howl here That her personality is perfect for him Should I not care about her physical beauty or should that also be a big concern in picking my ideal woman. God, you should have put this into chat, GPT, before you send it. Have always dreamed of having a great family and having my wife being my best friend.

So I thought no better people to ask than us. I probably have to get Brittany to weigh in on this one. Because I have a feeling she looked at me and said, he got a great personality, but he ain't pretty. You need to go to a psychiatrist. What? And have him test you, son. Okay, because you've got some issues that you're not dealing with.

Yeah, we probably should say that one for Brittany. I feel like she'd really be able to provide some clarity here. Yeah. Don't get me wrong. She's not ugly, but she just isn't my physical type. Are we talking about like she's blonde and you like brunette? Nope, no. Or it's like she got a show on TLC.

No, no. Or she got seven toes. Like, where we are? Someone, someone is in denial. I know what show you're talking about. Yeah. Okay. She has a sister about the same size.

Someone is in denial about this woman that he's looking at here. Okay. You need to go have a test, son. Hmm. She might need to, too. We don't know. We don't know enough about her. I got nothing for Chase, man.

Yeah. Oh, I do. If you're just going to a turd. He needs to go have psychology. Case, might I suggest you start with Genesis 1? In the beginning. Just start there because if you're proclaiming to be a Christian and where this judgmental on earthly looks,

we may ought to, we may, may ought to revisit some things in there. There may be some parts that you glanced over or perhaps got lost in translation. You know, I'm not real sure. There's a Jack Black movie that you need to go watch from 2001. one. No, he don't want to watch it. It'll solve all your problems.

He needs to go have a psychological test. Psychological test. Mental health is this guy's jam now. I'm telling you, he's, hey, he's got some mental issues he's got to adjust and deal with. Just think of it. How did he, how did he describe her? Not ugly. Not ugly.

But he's finally caring about the women that he date. Yeah. And I've got to be more picky in the choice. Can I see the list prior? No. Chase, why would you email this? Yeah. Oh, no, I know what school he goes to.

Since the pictures here, son. Oh, what's cold does he get to? I bet you I can figure out what this school looks like. You do know that, hey, beauty is only skin deep. And it's fleeting. Right? Does she take care of the house? Does she cook?

She brings you tea when to come by? She don't do nothing. You've met a 20-year-old girl lately? They can't do cook. I don't know if this will make it and Hunter feel free to cut it. But do you Phil Robertson one time.

Oh, oh, we'll have brought in the band. Go, do it. He said, find you a homely one, son. That's right. He said, they'll never be gone and they'll take care of everything at the house for you. I believe he might have even added the word plump in there.

I wasn't going to go that far, but he did say find you a homely looking one. And I said, Phil, I think I'm the homely looking one in this relationship. Also, he, yeah. Wow. Find you a homely looking one. Anyway, thanks for joining us here in the duck call room. Proverbs 3110.

Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. There you go. Chase. In other words, she's a keeper. I'm going to go find. them. Hey, some of you're throwback, but hey,

then when you run up on one, that's a keeper. You don't let her go. What if they're dating now? Don't let her go. Oh, yeah, that's part of a date now. And then she hears this. Oh, that'd be terrible for Chase. We'll see you next time in the duck caller.

Good luck, Chase. Good luck.