Duck Call Room - Uncle Si Will Never Tango with Murder Masseuses EVER Again

Episode Date: June 11, 2024

Phillip’s recent trip to Belize gives Uncle Si nightmares about his own experience there with the world’s toughest masseuse. John-David is pumped that his childhood hockey experience is coming back to the ice in Monroe and Martin relives his trip to Canada with Godwin and Mountain Man. Phillip watched his kids spearfish with his heart in his throat and Si’s list of things he definitely doesn’t mess with grows longer.  - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Say the first word that comes to your mind when you think of Edmonton. Oilers. Not really. I mean, that's what I would have. The North. Is that their name? Yeah. Okay.

Oh, yeah, Oilers. Okay. Wayne Gretzky. Cold. Hockey puck. Missing teeth. Hey. Ducks.

Hey, missing teeth. Yeah. She said Edmonton, not Arkansas. Wait till you see what I have to show you later. Hey, I understand. Hey, all hockey players have missing teeth. All of them. I'm trying to think the first word is probably Alberta.

I don't know why. It's in Alberta. I don't even know what a province is. It's a country within a country. How many countries are in that country? Is this like a Great Britain thing? No, I mean, it's all Canada. But they're states or provinces, as they call it.

They're big. They ain't little. They ain't got no Rhode Island up there. I've only been to Saskatchewan. Like that Northwest Territories part up there is like as big as the United States. Not really, but I mean, it's close. When you say to the northwest, I think, a mounting. Oh, the Mountain Police.

Well, hey, I'm just you know. The RCMP, baby. The Royal Canadian Mounted. That's right. That's right. They said. A long! Do they still ride horses?

Yeah, they still ride horses. I don't know. They're real cowboys. Real-life cowboys. Yeah, real-life cowboys. real. I went to Alberta one time with Godwin a mountain man. Oh, wild

You never make it a mistake again. The men's professional lacrosse game or something? LaCross? Yeah, we were like the entertainment of the lacrosse league or something. It was wild. Wow. It was wild. Was it fun? Or wild? Both.

But I didn't realize that men's professional lacrosse they run around and hit each other with stick. Like away from the play is where you want to be watching. because they just whacking each other with that. If you live in Canada and play professional sports, you got to be tough, buddy. Because it's cold.

It's cold, but they beat the crap out of each other. Hockey, lacrosse. Well, that, dang gum Calgary Stampede Day's Rodeo, that ain't no regular rodeo. Them people up there, they're just hitting each other? Well, they got their mean horses and stuff, because they're mad because it's cold up there too. So when somebody get on them, they're like, get off me.

This ain't it. But you live up in Canada. You are a tough. That's why they end up here. playing professional hockey for your Monroe Maccasin. They're back, Sa. We have a hockey team. Is that the name of the hockey team? So we hit that. Last time we recorded, they were like, Munro's getting a hockey team. Not Moskis. Codmouse.

We are officially the proud owners of a hockey team in Wachitaal Parish. Monroe Muckasins. Who owns them, do we know? Some guy out of New Orleans. Mr. Perkins, I think. Oh. Is he a Cajun? No, he's from New York.

They are already. The president of the team is Canadian. It doesn't know. Cajun. Well, that ain't no Cajun know how to play no hockey. What are you talking about? Yeah, they do. But we've already got our first player.

Hold on. Hold on. Are you ready for our first player? Yeah, where? There's Marcus. I don't really know about him. But Kyle is the most hockey. Hey.

Hawkins Welcome to Monroe. Professional hockey team. Looking forward to bringing hockey back to Monroe. I can't wait to get the season going and get out in the community, you know, see some of those museums and everything else.

He's coming to the museum. Something special. Hey, we got a museum. We do have a couple of them. I bet he's a tough old boy. What makes you say that? Because he plays professional hockey and he's missing.

One tooth for sure. No. I got to get to meet this guy. I want to order this guy's jersey. This is the most hockey-looking hockey player I've ever seen in my life. And he's going to be a moccasin. Let's get him on the podcast. Kyle holler at me when you get here.

I got questions for you. How do the Monroe Moxons already have an Instagram page? Not to brag, but of the first 13 people they followed, I was one of them. They follow you? Well, I shared it. I was watching. So I grew up a big moccasins fan. Like, I was the kid, you know, the eight kids that joined the skate town.

hockey league. You were one of them? I was one. Me and Kobe Mike and there were six other kids I didn't know. We were all going to be the first professional hockey players from Monroe. How did that turn out for you? It didn't. I've seen your ankles. That ain't going to worry. Well, I got more on that later. But

it was fun and we loved hockey and we had us a team for like three or four years. There's politics or something behind the fact that it left, but they're back and it's fun. Well, here's one thing I know about hockey players. They are multitaskers. That's right.

I'm a single-tasker and they're multitaskers. I'm single-tank. Because you've got to know what you're doing. That's a tough sport. Then they can play the puck with the stick. No offense, but like, and then they fight.

Okay, then they fight. They're just standing there. Hey, right. You ever try fighting on skates? No. Hey, try it. I don't even, I don't even. I don't even skate on skates.

I have ice skated before and it's tough. Hold on. I was your thing about it. I've ice skated. No, no, look, they take a pair of shoes and put a sharp knife on the bottom of it. And then you got a skate on that knife. Oh, I get the premise. I don't do it.

I haven't. But look, we're going to get to ice skate. No, we're not. The mayor said we are. Oh, no, yeah. The mayor said we're going to keep the ice rink and people are going to be able to rent skates. Oh, I love it. After the game. I'm still not doing it.

Martin, please come ice skating. Well, you're talking about, hey, will you talk about, Hey, well, you're talking about you need to go see that because, hey, that would be a real good entertainment. Oh, I'll go watch it. People dropping down. Yeah. Hey. When Kyle Stevens drops the gloves and starts punching some guy in the face on ice, I'm going to be so happy.

So how quick till there's like a honeyhole logo on the ice? That's right. You know, we're going to have a meeting about it next week. We're going to see. I know. They might have to call Johnny Morris to get a logo on the ice of a tackle shop, but I'm going to have tickets. I've already decided. I think so.

It's 28 games, which is a lot, and I got young kids, so you might be getting some, I'm just going to be giving out tickets. Do they have, do they have, like, boxes there? No. Do you not remember, have you been in the Civic Center, haven't you? I was just wondering if, like, renovations came with it. Like, it's going to have to be successful.

Well, hey, I've got a big question. What? They put ice in the Civic Center down here? Yeah. Now, I am interested in. They back it in in trucks. Beep. Well, no, no, hey, I would like to see that operation because, hey, that's a.

Sa, I'm telling you right now, I got. We're going to go, and we're going to figure out how to get you on the ice. I want to, I want you to sing the national anthem at the first game. No, I hate seeing the national anthem. That's a tough one. Well, hey, you got, you got figures that are paid millions of dollars, and they don't ever want to sing the national anthem. How about just a spotlight of sound?

Yeah. Yeah. That used to be one of the past parts. I would do that. So I could do what we've been paid to do before, like go to these minor league hockey games and drop the pucks. I have a bunch of hockey pucks from all the ones back in the Duck Dynasty days. I have a bunch of money.

Oh, hey, I got my own way to do that. Uh-oh. Are you guys listening? Nobody would ever drop a puck. Like, if they see me do it, that's the way they have to do it all the time. Don't tell us yet, sigh. Save it till we get to do it. Save it till we're going out.

something special. Hunter, send this over to the Mockison's Instagram page. Immediately. That he wants to do this. Are we going to have like Duk call room live from the Mockisons game? Yes. I love it. Do you realize that fourth grade me is just freaking out right now at that possibility?

Johnny D. If they live stream these games, there's a real chance you could be the host. That's right. A commentator. You could be the voice. John David. No, no, no.

Oston, the Mockas for their first game. No, that guy that did it back in the day's going to do it. No, look, because they did the voice. the Chicago Bulls intro. And you know, we didn't have a Jumbotron, so they just had spotlights. And they'd put it on the kids and stuff and the adults dancing. And then

they would play that, uh, the Chicago Bo, do-na-na-na-l-uh. And then that dude would say, please welcome to Monroe. And he would go, uh, like, I don't know how he does it that long. And then he would mock us and everybody go crazy. And there would be cheap light. Well, that's the arena guy.

That's the arena guy. No, I'm talking about you as like the Facebook live. Play-by-play. Okay, so here's the other problem. The streaming pay $8.99 a month to watch minor league hockey. Yeah. I think it's free. They said it's on YouTube. Oh, see, there you go.

But you could be the guy. Oh, that's icing on Monroe. I see. I don't know. I think I could do that for football. Hockey not is. I got no clue what's going. I'm there to watch Canadians hit each other.

Well, maybe you're just the color commentary. Well, then all you got to say is, hey. We'll find a play-by-play guy, and you're just color commentary. We can watch the Stanley Cup Like tonight in practice We I don't want to do this Like

Oh That's a commitment To all 28 games Do you know Oh no 28 is home games These things are playing a lot That's what

Well you wouldn't Surely the moccasins aren't going to have a traveling announcer I don't know Who know It might be Biggie

A home team You just get to watch The home team's version of like Them talking about the people It's the FPHL man I know more about the FPHL in the last two days.

What's the F for? Federal Professional Hockey League. Do you know all the rules, John David? Of hockey? Yeah. Are most of them? No. Not any of them.

Beth, do you know? She better? She's from Edmonton. So, see, I don't know when somebody's coming in a foul or not. But I do see them fight a lot. I know those lines on the ice mean a lot. The federal prospects hockey league. Okay.

They're gold miners. We're prospecting. Well, I think it's because they're prospects to the NHV. chef. Per house. They're prospics, boys. Yeah. Kyle, I'm rooting for you.

I hope you hit somebody and get called up to the Edmonton Oilers one day. All right. Look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means. That means more outside cooking. And y'all know, we love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Triedels beef makes such a good product, baby.

Ain't it good? It's so good. Our friend, Cyre Robertson would say, buy on a grill! Look, before we got Trial's, getting ready to, for a cookout meant somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes from.

But with Tritails beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Tritails comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch. So they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill.

Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Triedails beef. I know in size case, Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat. She isn't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah.

Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash. Stuck. Support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. So I'd argue your kids. Which one would be the hockey player? Vins. Well, we went to Skate Town last night.

Did you? Yeah. I was to skate again just to see if I could still do it. Also, it was Christian night at Skate Town. They didn't ask if you were a Christian to get in the door, which is a good thing. But you made it anyway. But I got in. I just thought it was hilarious that it was, quote, Christian Night at Skate Town.

So they had like church at Skate Town? No, they just played Christian music. Oh, that's pretty cool. So it's like elevation worship, and then we're going to turn the lights off and listen to La Cray. Really? 100%. And I had the time of my life. Do we just have the one skate town?

No, we got two. There's one in Monroe, and then there's one right by the Honeyhole. I like the one by the Honey Hole. Yeah, well, the Monroe one doesn't have Christian night. Only the Westmore. Oh, all those holy rollers on this side of the river. It might have Christian. It's got Defend Yourself night.

Well, the Munro. The Monroe one is directly adjacent to the Waffle House, so there's a little wind there. Oh, my goodness. You can leave, skate down and go Waffle House at the Monroe one. Sigh, when is the last time that you roller skated? Can you remember? Oh, that's been a yon deal. When's the last time you ran across any kind of covered pond of ice or anything?

Never. I can't wait to ice. That would have been my childhood. Yeah. Do you think you could still skate? If we strapped on skates to your feet, could you do it? Yeah. Hey, he looked like Carter.

You just have a big, a bunch of balloons on me, too. I'm going to need them skis. I'm going to need them skis. It's got the, uh, that go over your shoes. Yeah, the little tracks on them that, like, slow you down. Like, you, like, really got to put some force behind them to move because you give me one that's got free wheels. I'm about to eat it, buddy. I ain't.

So the first 10 minutes, I was like, I have not done this in a while. Here's my kids. There she is. She ain't moving. Oh, yeah. I'm on that. Carter. Wait for Carter.

I'm on Lottie's back. There's Carter. That's as fast as he ever got. Here comes Ben's. He's probably selling something. And crotch. Ben's on rollerblade. Oh, yeah.

I was too. And I'm, you know, to be one of the eight kids in the hockey league back in 1998, by the end of the night, I felt like I could rollerblade again. Really? Yeah, it was kind of scared. Do you have your weighted vest on? No, but I felt like I did because I don't remember how to stop. And I still hadn't figured that out.

and there was a couple people in danger. That's what them walls. Oh, we had too many smart eggs. There was a lady. Oh, hey, no. And they like to, you know, here they come. You know, you're out there struggling. And then that's, you know, somebody's grabbed you.

Oh, yeah. And here you go. You, they're slamming you in the wall. I remember, like, growing up at skate, you know, scat town, like the party, people would always have her birthday parties there. And, of course, I'm the husky kid. Husky. And then you weren't great.

At limbo Yeah, limbo Oh, trash Neither were any of my children Yeah, trash Did they do limbo last night? Is that like a every night thing? Yeah, they did limbo

Just to different music Since it was Christian night They did couple skate to the blessing Oh really? No, but I was like We left a little early So they might have But I would have laughed

My butt off if they would have had And your children And they would have been Couple of skate And I was crying No, she had dinner Somewhere with a friend So I was like,

Kids, we're going to Sonic and then we're going to Skate Town. It was a real American night. We're getting fired up for ice hockey being in Monroe. For all the people in the comments that say you ain't a redneck. Buddy, you just went to Sonic and Skate Town on a Wednesday night for Christmas night. They need to get off you. Yeah.

I mean, that's about as. I left my job. I mean, aside from 5.30 till 7.30. I mean, we're there. Like, you know. I left. I was sweeping a cricket cage all fired up that my minor league hockey team back, went to Sonic,

coming back. Then went to Christian night at the skating rann. It truly is a small thing, ain't it? It really is. And that's with only two players showing up so far. We got two, man. It's fired up. What did you get at Sonic since you're on this health kick? I'm just curious. I didn't eat all day so I could eat a double cheeseburger

and some french fries. Smash. He broke the rule, boys. No, it ain't breaking it. As long as you don't eat breakfast and lunch and you're starving, you can eat whatever you pretty much want. Yeah, one meal a day you can blow it out for the most part. I mean, don't, you know. That's my move.

Yeah. You got to, you know, don't eat two double cheeseburger. Yeah, just get one. Better decision. Hold on. I did have one more video because, and you're not why. This is while the crazy thing. Is that Carter?

Yeah, it's Carter. Watch the lady with the baby and a stroller just come zooming past. I see, that'd be, that'd be Brittany. Why is there a stroller at the skating rink? I love Carter. Them arms don't ever stop. Hey, look, no, that girl, that girl came past. and goes, just calm down.

She was his age. She said, just calm down, man. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Hey, I was so proud because at the beginning of the night, we were just, he was hanging on me, he was knocking me down, I was falling. I'm not going to say he was the worst skater

in the building. You know who you were if you were there last night. But he was in the top, you know, of the bad ones. But we got way better. We improved and that's all you can do. Is that floor still as hard? as I remember it.

I only fell. I only fell. There ain't no give in it. I only fell, fell once and I said, I ain't doing that again. I hated it the next morning when I had to wake up and get out of bed.

I always hated a transition from the floor to the carpet. Buddy. Then you get bruises from the floor and you get carpet burn. I still couldn't figure that out either. I didn't know how to do that even after we left.

But what y'all don't know probably is way back in the day there was a wall all the way down there at Skate Town. You know, they took the wall down and then now it just goes from floor to carpet. But there used to be like a four-foot wall that you would hit and flip over if you were going too fast. There's a little wall over there, but it's not the whole way. Yeah, it was.

That was a good move taking that down. That carpet floor transition, man. Your elbows got carpet burn and your knees just bruised up from a hard floor, from a bowling alley floor essentially. That's harder to hold. I still haven't figured out how to stop. I don't think I had a spot on my body that you could not touch. I'm going to.

No, don't touch me. And my ankles are just so in sore today. Oh, yeah. I didn't realize that I was holding up that much on the, it hurt. Oh, them tendons ain't been used in a long time, big dog. Yeah. Like, that's a different.

It's a great workout. It's a different set of muscle memory that you ain't got no memory of. No. Yeah, you don't use you. I'm about to go buy some rollerblades and a hockey stick. Before we get just too terribly far, we did. I want to say thanks to Grant Weatherford. All right, Grant.

Fan of the Monroe Moxon. He is. He did. He talked about that too. He posted it. Yeah. So he made some crappie jigs out of feathers that Burley gave him from ducks that were by field, burly.

You know, who knows who'd killed them at the end of the day. By the time the ducks were the best feathers made it to him. But he made us a set of croppy jigs to him. hang up here in the duck call room. So I thought that was actually cool. He dropped them by today. And, you know, he's taking some to Unashame too. But you know what? Look at our number on the Oh, we're number one. We're number one. He said, which one you want? I said number one. If you still got it. That's not a question. Yeah. He said, well, I figured y'all would want one of the first two. And I was like, yeah, no, give Unashame number two. It'd be all right. That's what I'm talking about.

Yeah. So, no, we got another little display. I think it's cool. Like, there's pretty, pretty good uh like there's you know you can you can see like mallards and woodies and like i mean you can see all the different feathers of the different critters and it's a it's a cool thing i mean i'm tempted to like take one out and try to well oh hey i was fix hey if stone still had his boat yeah that wouldn't be in here alone i would be down on caney lake now this is a with throwing that on rod and real earth i do want him to make me just one that's a showpiece man and i want to go catch And I brought this letter in, so if y'all want to, I didn't feel like bringing the whole box in. But you boys can stop by my office.

There's a bunch of Bucky's gifts. Oh, snap. That our friend Seth. Oh, that's a real. With a thank you letter. That's kind of a Martin move. Wow. It's in my office.

It's in my office. Go get them. You can go get them. But you know that I leave that way in your office is that one. You act like my door's ever closed or locked. I'm just so. Good thing you said it here because it would have been at my office and none of y'all. would have got it. Yeah, I just didn't feel like hauling it over here. But I, you know, there's,

there's all flavors of beaver nuggets and I think the front desk folks grabbed it, scarfed up the beef jerky, but they tack, you know, they've got a delivery tag. I'm getting stuff to you. You don't like the beef jerky side? No beef jerky, man. No. Oh, Lord, well, Philip, you've been gone, ain't you? Yeah, I just got back. Me and the family, this was great because we went on a family vacation and it's hard to get everybody back together when your kids get old and grown and like I talked about last time I was with you guys my daughter got engaged um that was awesome she and her fiancee did it feel so they went with us and me and alicia my oldest son bryson came from the air force in england and came over and went with us and blake and my mother-in-law

So we scuba dived Did you scuba dive or snorkel? No, I snorkeled. Bryce and Blake and Alicia, they all went scuba diving, like way off in saw sharks and I'll go. Yeah, I'm too claustrophobic, too fat. I don't want to do that.

Uh-uh, scared. Snorkeling is fine. Plenty fun. But I also... Somebody got to protect the ice chest. Yeah, I mean, and the boat. Yeah, I can only do snorkeling for a little while. Then I'm like, yeah, yeah, that was fun.

Okay, I saw everything. but like I want some kind of life vest near me at all times, you know. You want a God one. Yeah. Somebody can go grab on. I just grab on to. Snortland's fun. It was great.

It was, um, we had a good time. Where'd y'all go? We went to Ramon's Village and Belize. Oh, y'all are in Belize, yeah. Oh, dang. Yeah, gone, gone. Amber and DJ went ziplining and intertubing. So.

Did you go fishing? We did go fishing. What did you catch? Good fish. All kinds of different kind of fish off the reef. We just went fishing. Perch fishing. Yeah.

Yeah, we caught probably 25 of those. It was to believe. And then we got some conks and we ate those. What's a con? Stone crab. That's a big, it's like, it's like, it's like, that's the shell. Oh, you ate it?

Yeah, the inside of it. Yeah, not the shell. There's a, there's a moll that lives in it. They wouldn't let us bring the shells back. You never had, like, fried conk or anything? They make a wild. all kinds of stuff out of it. It's actually pretty good.

Pretty solid. But the fish they cooked it and cleaned it and cooked everything right there. It's good, man. On the beach. I've eaten it in Key West. It's actually, it's really good. It is good. Beating a lot of con.

Yeah, lots of conk. Lots of conk being consumed. Some people say conch. Cut that. Anyways, but you went all the way to, how do you get to Belize? Up on a plane and go. Fly. Yeah, you're fine.

I've always wanted to go to Belize. Well, I can get you the hookup. Get with me after the show. What did it, Belize? There's a hookup? Guatemala. Wait, I'm looking at where you just said you stayed. Yeah, you come here from Honduras.

Yeah. You had to go to Honduras? No, we just flew from Dallas. Yeah, to like Belize City or something. Yeah, we flew straight into Belize City. And then we took one of the little planes like a 15 passenger. Whoa. And then we flew over to a...

It's either that or the ferry to get you to the island, San Pedro's Island. I like a boat I got on a plane in Haiti one time and I was like I'm good without ever doing that again Like a small plane? Yeah

Like a plane that was built in Haiti That's never left Haiti Yeah And no offense to Haiti people Not a retired team there I ain't getting in your planes ever again That was terrifying Hey we wrote on some puddle jumpers

That you actually landed in the ponds In Alaska Me inside there Hold on I know and look Did the one in Belize land in the ocean? No, no No

It landed on the island Yeah, it did It landed on the island Okay, that's good Oh, so Sa-in you've been there before or something Yeah, I've been there Oh, okay I've been there a couple times

So Ramon's Village? Yeah That's where he caught all the bone fish Do you all have a punch card? We got a connection We got a connection That's awesome You're making me forget what I was going to say

I got to see. Oh yeah, man, Stone. Stone went fishing Stone's been there before He went fishing and I didn't catch anything So the next day he said hey come fishing with him But we're going to go after bone fish And we caught like 25

So you're the lucky charm Yeah they was everywhere Look yo I thought I had a whale I'm serious I set the hook on one I thought I had a whale you know And when I got him in The fish was I don't even see nothing How about that little giraffe, the giraffe thing?

No, he's about, he was about. That panther, look at the panther. No, he was about as big as that swan right there, his neck. Huh. About that back around and about that long. And it took me like 15 minutes to get him in. I thought he was Moby Dick. I'm serious, I asked, Ramon, or, no, Pablo.

Pablo. Sevy, Sevy. Sevy. Sevy. Sevy. Sevy. Sevy. Sevy.

Pablo was our guy that was pushing us to our guide. Escobar. Yeah, y'all. I said, what's the biggest one of these you've caught? And he said, eight pounds. And I said, on this rod and reel, he said, yeah. I said, you're a bald-faced liar. You didn't catch no eight-pound bonefish on that stupid rodion.

He ever tore that thing up. But, hey, but, you know, then there's a silver fish schooling, you know, and we saw the school, but they wouldn't bite. I wanted to catch one of them. They're really pretty. And they're like a big perch. Oh, interesting. We tore the bone fish up.

Yeah. So you get a good, you get a good rate there at Ramon's Phillips? Yeah, yeah, it was really good. I'm looking at it right now. It's not bad. But look. It is. You went and landed on a full price.

They're proud of that thing, son. Look, y'all went and landed on an island that has three streets on it. And at one point, they just stopped one of the streets, turn it into a, runway and then continue the street on the other you got to make it you just come in in the middle of all the houses that looks like the planes coming at us guys

I'm saying we're fixing trash in the city and then all of a sudden you just look there's a little runway it gets you know come around and come back I mean it's literally hey you hit right past the house hit the deal and you

lift up right past the house to get up out of there I'm Google. I'm serious. Google Map aficionado, he's not lying. Hey, no, no, it's literally, bam. It makes me uncomfortable. It's wild, you know.

How far is the flight? It's wild. From Belize City is like 15 minutes. Oh, 15 minute flight. It ain't bad. And you're going to get real high. You're watching all the water and seeing people on boats and stuff. I like being high in a plane.

Yeah, this thing is. Give me time to figure out what I'm going to do while it's crashing. It's only time. Give you going to die. Give you time to say that. Give me time to say that one last prayer. Dear Lord. Make sure you cover everybody.

Oh, man. That sounds like fun, though. That does sound like fun. I was asking about it because 10 years is next year. That may be a place. It's a beautiful place. Please. Let me talk to me more about it.

It's awesome. It's wonderful. That way you're not paying that full price. And hey, do you remember there's a waiter there? His name's Jack. After 10 years, you'll pay pretty much whatever. And he calls itself Jackopedia, and he knows every state and everything. about every state. So no matter where you're from, he can tell you 20 things about your state

and what's... Yeah, we got to question this guy. It's a good way to make a lot of... Oh, yeah, he's great. You know, what's the capital city of, you know? Louisiana or whatever. Bam, bam, bam, bam. Do you know those? No, I was impressed. Well, then how do you know if he was right? Oh, no, he did what he was talking about.

Oh, yeah, he did. If he didn't know, he was a heck of a sales. Some of the people had their phones and they was Googling it is the food? Hey, look. It's great. And hey, before they can Google it. Google it and get the answer, he'll tell you what it was. And what kind of food they have? What's the leaves? They just go

stab something in the ocean. Cook it. Look, they bring a hot stone out there. Steak on a stone. And you can also cook. And I also got chicken and shrimp and steak. So we cooked everything. They brought the stones out. You put the meat on there and whatever spices you want and you turn it. And cook it the way you want it.

Yeah. Oh, it was good. But there's also, what are those things that taste like bananas kind of side? I can't remember. Plantains? Yes. And they got a lot of rice and beans. And there's places that you can go off of the resort.

And everybody drives golf carts on the island. I mean, and you don't have to have a license because you can rent motorcyles. Yeah. Well, I don't even know if he's got a license. Did you get a pineapple facial? No, but I'm reading their menu right now. We got the hot stone, the 90-minute hot stone relaxation spa. Me and my mother-in-law.

you do want to get a massage. Yeah, he got one when we were there. Look, that woman liked to kill me. No, no, I'm literally screaming like a child at a while. Were you ticklish anyway? No, no. A massage ain't a good thing for you. No, no, when she grabbed my back, she said, oh, my goodness, you're so stiff.

She said, relax. Y'all, and then she got to chasing a knot in my body with her. elbow and I was just and look I felt like I had a knife in me and she did this for like 45 minutes and me and Stone are sent to the side watching and laughing

the whole time he said you're overreacted this was a group massage oh yeah well we were there with him because he was like hey y'all stay right here supposed to me you're overreacting I said you know and I used the bad words what I told him no I'm not I said this woman's killing me

I said, is she got a knife in her hand? He used to pass. I said, because that's what I feel like every time she puts whatever she's, but she chased a knot over my whole back. You ever find it? She never did. Get rid of it. I know that.

The funny thing was when she turned around and grabbed some more oils, then I snuckled out because he's faced down. And I started hitting him. I said, hey, I said, hey, I said, whatever you're doing, don't stop it. I thought it was her. And then he got tickled and he quit. You know.

They were playing the bongos on your back. And he's like, I like, I like it now. I don't know if I could do a massage. I've never had one. Oh, yeah,

they're fine. Because I asked afterwards. I got over everyone to watch your shoes. You're working on stone. The hard part in a massage is staying awake. So I mean like, oh, I don't have a problem staying awake.

That one was killing me. I'd go face down and go to sleep. Yeah. He was literally screaming at the top of his life. No, no. There is. But there's like a difference between massage. Well, I will say this.

Massage therapy. Once she quit, when I got out, I just, I said, you felt like a spaghetti noodle, didn't you? I said, man, I said, I ain't felt this good in a long time. Uh-huh. I said, well, whatever you did, it helped. So that's what we did, and we went to that lady, and it's right there out on the beach.

You know, they've got a little setup there. It's really cool. Oh, that's neat. So, yeah, it was great. Ramones Village. Ramon's San Pedro. Oh, and that thing, hey, when we went to Mississippi with Gina for how that deal that was, they won all like 10 awards.

Yeah. Oh, they did. They was number one at everything. In Mississippi? Yeah, that's who owns these place. That was Richard. Richard was the one that wrote the books that Simon has. The book?

Him and Sauer. really good buddies. And not all the dots. But hey, I want to go. It's a, it's a real nice, let's go the end of next May.

Hey, you and Allison come. Yeah, and we'll do a podcast. Yeah, we can just go. Hunter, there we go.

Hunter, Hunter, you're invited. Does Hunter still have a girlfriend, Martin? Yeah, he does. Allegedly. I mean, I don't ask today. I still do.

Okay. Hunter, I checked on the day. Do people like you go to the beach? I went to the beach. It's a trick question? What are you mean? I just remember.

What? You had to go meet all the family. No, she met his family. Oh, his family. Yeah. Okay, well, how did that go? I went really well. What did your grandpa say?

She didn't meet my grandpa. Oh, she didn't meet him. Yeah, no, yeah. No, she met my... Missing out. What? She's missing out. Oh, yeah, no, she is missing out.

My grandfather's awesome. Can we get her to call in? So we can ask us. We got a lot of questions. I can. No, no. No, I ain't called in. No, not call in.

She's got to come here. That's right. She's got to be here. And she works for your mom, so make it happen. That's that. I just meant Hunter plays a lot of, uh, watch a lot of movies. I didn't know if like outdoor sitting in the sand was your thing. Yeah.

No, I go every summer. I go swimming in the river, do a little, you know, kneeboarding. I'm not going to swimming in the river. I mean, swimming. Bali beach. It's a sand bar. The beach is like a beach. It's like a beach.

It's a lot. Yeah, sandbar. Wait, wait, wait, wait, time. It's like a beach. Yeah. It's a guy who spends a lot of time on the Washhtaw River. There ain't nothing on the Washhtaw River like a beach. Oh, yes, sir.

No. Oh, you, red. It's actually right next to Phil's house. What Phil's property there is what they call a beach. I understand there's a sandbar. That is not a beach. That's taking that for you. Hey, no.

Hey, Hunter, that's who's a sandbar. Sandbar. That is a beach. I think so. That, that's, that's, that's, that's, the kind of people that go Fort Morgan. It may be able to watch the Elr River, but

it is a... They end up in Galveston. It's sand. They've been to two beaches in their life. It ain't like sand in front of Ramon's village. That's a different type of wood. Yeah, because this sand is actually mud.

No, it ain't exactly sand. There ain't a drop of sand in the 71292, sir. Oh, yeah. Unless you haul it in. I beg your pardon, sir. You're wrong. So let me, let me end with this, y'all, about my, uh. Hey, yeah.

Being, I don't know what sand looks like. Oh, yeah. Well, I am interested in how a vacation with adult children turned out. Yeah, it was, it was so great. I mean, like, DJ and Amber did their own thing. They would have, you know, date, night and go and eat and do their things. And then me and Bryson Blake would hang out on the beach and Arlene and Alicia would come in. But the coolest thing was we got behind the boat.

and Bryson and one of our guides will, they held on to the ropes with their snorkeling gear and when they would see some kind of fish that they could, you know, get. They were stabbing fish? Yeah, they would drop the rope and go down, get the fish and hold it out of the water. You got to get it out of the water because the sharks will come if you don't. And they would hold it up and then the boat would come by

and we'd take the fish off. So Blake said, I want to do it. And I was like, oh, Bryson's a great swimmer. He's certified in scuba diving. He's in the Air Force. I mean, this kid's awesome. But I was like, Blake, I mean, I don't know. That's going to be a tough, tough deal because that's a hard swim.

Blake got in and did great. And I was like, I couldn't even do that. And Amber said, I'm next. Uh-oh. My little girl, you know, I was like, no way. She got out there and showed them up. I mean, she was like, I can do it all. Wow.

And she did. So that was the coolest thing to me. Did you? No, are you kidding me? I want to have a live best. Johnny Dee. If we all go, we're not spearing fish.

I'm a six. See, I was, I've always wanted to go spearfishing. I'm like Mard. Until I just found out I had to hold the fish out of the water. No, no, I'm with,

the sharks will come. I'm with Mark. You have to, you have to, immediately. I'll be sitting on the ice chest full of ice cold beer. A cold ultralight, while you clowns are in the water,

fighting the sharks. Okay. An ultralite. I will, I do have to admit, a cold beer tastes better when you can smell salt water. I'm just, I'm just,

I'm just, I'm being honest. Hey. Yeah. They taste better. And it's got to be ice coat. Yeah. How good are limes?

Yeah. Amen, buddy. Hey, I'm just saying. Hey. But I'll handle my cricket. When they see something they think we can catch, they can just run down there with it and hang it in front of them. Let me reel it in.

Yeah. I've been with Martin on some of these things before. Remember when you had your GoPro in the water? Yeah, I wouldn't get in there. Uh-uh. Let me just stay in there. No, I'm not going to get in the water for their sharks and then spear something. to make him bleed.

Yeah, me and Johnny did do that. You and Martin stay in the boat. I don't know. I've never thought about the bleeding fish aspect of spearfishing and sharks. And hey, and not only that, it's some ridiculous amount of distance. Yeah, that's what they were saying. One, one, now, listen to this. This is true.

This is what they were telling us. One drop of blood, okay, a shark can smell that at some, ungodly distance. Okay. I think Mark Robert did a video on that one time. Oh, no, it's ridiculous.

Okay, and I'm talking about one drop, small drop from a mile away. Yeah. I might not ever go to spend fishing. The only thing a shark going to smell out of me is poop. And a lot of it. That's what I be doing.

I'm with you. Now, forget that. I ain't swimming in the ocean. Johnny D. What is in that inbox? We've come a long way to that. anger it built you know it made us know

sorry I wasn't ready for that he wasn't ready for it I'm headed to that end box I can see it up oh what was that picture you showed me oh yeah no so I wanted to look at this this was a guy sent me this on the Facebook yeah the book of faces face of book watch this thing

good fish right there that's a good old fish I know what kind is it catfish look what they pulled out That catfish pulled a whole Beaver out. They put, I don't know what it was, but somebody sent me that and saw it. Okay. They pulled a beaver out of a catfish.

Uh-huh. Wow. Well, they got them in now. I didn't know that catfish ate beaver. That may have been in the Amazon jungle. Yeah, they could have pulled the fish from anywhere. Well, I'm just saying that, that fish probably came from the Amazon jungle. because I've seen a show and look

they called a catfish okay and it took three men to hold him one had his head one in the middle and one on the tail I just like looking at Johnny D's picture I was a family picture he had pulled out was it yeah yeah I don't know how it works I don't know how the sausage does I didn't think a beaver had a predator but it does it does other than you more catfish now rowing from Pittsburgh PA PAPAPA

PA boys Pennsylvania I think they got a bunch of hockey teams We're going to be playing. He did that. Him and his wife, Lacey. Love the podcast. And you know what? This one actually goes hand in hand with one I read today, kind of.

We're going to read Rowans, but a guy named John from Minnesota had very similar question. Like all the same stuff going on. It said, Nicky, you need advice. Martin? Si, me. Did you ever have a kid go to the NICU? No.

Well, we're three for four, so we can all give advice here. Here's the deal. His wife had to have an emergency C-section, 30 weeks. That's not the full 40. Obviously, they're going to be in the NICU. They were told stay probably two and a half months. That's a long time. Additionally, the hospital's 45 minutes away,

and it's going to be tough for him to get there every day. Should he feel guilty? for not being able to visit my daughter every day. Feels awful about it. And he doesn't see a clear answer at all. Any advice would be welcome. Do not feel guilty about that. Biblically, you have to provide for your family.

So whatever that looks like, that means you can't go every day because of work or whatever the reason is of getting there and getting back. No, don't feel guilty. But go as much as you can. Don't be too hard on yourself about it. And you don't have to camp out there.

there. Stopping it. Like when, when Waylon was in there, I went, held him, played with him, talked to the nurses, cut up a little bit, and then I got out of there. Like I didn't. It's not a fun player. No, it was so sad. I didn't want to be in there long. Now, granted, I was only 20 minutes from it, but it was, you know, still. Just do what you can. Do the best job you can. Um, and it is, but don't take it easy on yourself, man. Hey, look, when you get in that NICU and you'll see this, there is. There is. There is. There's nothing you can do for that child. They are doing it all anyway, and there's legit, other than reach through a little hole and touch their hand or something, there is nothing that you can do physically for that child, talk to them, say hello, the things. But just being there, when you are there, ask them the questions, learn what's going to happen when you get home that way.

Whenever you do bust out of there, you're the best that you can be for that child. That's a personal experience. that's the worst I've ever felt about myself because there was nothing I could do helpless. Everything was I felt so useless because I could not, there was nothing I could do

but I had a friend told me one time when he lost his mother and I went to the funeral and I said dude I don't know what to tell you but if you need anything I'm here if I can help you. And he told me, he said, hey, you just been here, it was enough. So like Martin said, there is nothing you can do.

Okay, but don't feel bad about it, okay? That's why people don't realize that's why we need the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Okay, because in times like that, when it's out of your control, hey, I turned it over the VIM. Yeah. Okay. And that's the only way I got through it because like I told you,

I felt useless. Okay. And here I am the dad. Uh-huh. Okay. And I felt totally inadequate. Just, you know, I felt real bad about myself, which I shouldn't have.

That's why when Martin said, hey, don't feel guilty. That's a good point. Yeah. Yeah. And this guy named John from Minnesota is in the same boat. And I was in that boat. Carter was flown to New Orleans when he was born, nine days after he was born. And then we were in New Orleans for 76 days, I think.

See, I was just the opposite. My wife and the baby flew to Texas. I took off after it. Me and Allison hopped in the car and took off. I came later. Okay. Yeah. And in my story, Allison stayed the whole time.

never left, which lived in a hotel in New Orleans, which is insane to think about now. And I would drive home from New Orleans on Monday mornings, work all week, Friday about lunch. I was cutting out and headed back there. And doing what I could for Allison,

really, because I couldn't do anything for Carter. Carter, the future president of the United States, was in the hands of some great nurses and doctors. But when I was there, I was like, you feel in the way.

I mean, I felt bad. like I was taking up space. Well, no, no. Because there's nothing. So my job, like, I looked at it as my job, it's like entertain the nurses. Like, you know, just talk to them and like, you know, break the somberness with a little humor and just get to know them because I'm sure, you know, they're talking every day to a child

that can't talk back and they're on 12-hour shifts. So like even just interacting with the nurses and the staff to me was a big deal. And something to thank them. My mother and sister, Judy, like to quit nursing because she lost a child. She was taking care of in intensive care. We, okay, and mama told her, hey, you might as well, you chose a profession. You ain't going to save them all. And now one of Wayland's nurses is actually a really good friend of us.

And I think it's important, I think it's important that you sit down and think about these things and know that there are some boundaries and some things you can. and can't control. And once you realize that, then you can move forward knowing what you can and can't do and take guilt out of the equation. Well, no, no.

That's why I said I turned it over to the Trinity. Okay. And that's why we do need it. Because there's going to be times in your life that, hey, you are not in control of nothing. So when did it get better? You're just there and you have to face it. For me?

Because y'all were going for a while. Never. I like and I want you to know this too like we're saying all the good things it sucks yeah it never it's a toughie it got better Carter was actually supposed to come home on my birthday uh May 15th and then they're like me nope he can't and I was so mad that day and then 11 more days I think he came home on like May 26 or something like that and he was born March 8th um so you are it it does stink but as someone, people, all three of us on the other side of it, it gets better.

But waiting through it is tough. And that's why side's totally right. Like the only person that's going to get you through it is Jesus Christ. And no one, because your boy was messed up. I just say this, okay. When you look back like a year from now, when your kid's home with you and everything's fine, you will see God's hand was on you.

And your child. And the cool thing, too. Now, nowadays, like, once I was this, and I don't even know with you, but like, now a lot of the NICUs have cameras. So you can, you can, like, check in on your child. Like, when you, on the days you can't be there. And, you know, with us, we had two of them. So we were at home taking care of one, obviously.

So, I mean, you know, there were times you couldn't leave because Brittany had a C-section. And that's right. So you got to take care of mom, too, right? Because mom can't pick anything up. She can't drive. She can't do all the things. So, like, I'm trying to. a split time between my child that's in the NICU, my wife, and then also my other child,

who is at home thriving. Yep. Like, and you, I mean, you want to talk about running out of 24 hours in a day? I just got tired listening to that. Like, so, I mean, you know, at first I wanted to obviously be with Whelan every chance I could. But, I mean, that's just not realistic in some cases, but you could log in, look at the camera and he's, you know, laying there doing his thing, like, you know, and you're like, okay. The worst is when you turn it on he was crying or like upset.

Like, because you just want to, meant your child. You want to comfort them. Yeah, but I mean, the other time, like it was really cool because you could actually watch him progress on camera too. Like you're like, oh man, he looks so much better today than he did yesterday. And so like you could get these little glimmers of like, oh, I bet we're on the way out. And Grant, we only did what, like eight days. I mean, we weren't in there very long.

Yeah, it was all. When they snatched him up and took him out of the room with us because we had had him for a day already. I was like, wait, no, no, what? Yeah, what's that? Now, where you going and what are you doing? Yeah. And let me say this to, Justin, is I know how I am about things that make me anxious. And, you know, don't displace your feelings, your emotions toward your loved ones and those closest to you. You've got something going on. Cast all your anxieties onto him. And that's what y'all are saying. Yeah. And God can help you through that, you know. Everybody else that you're taking it out on, They can't understand what you're going through.

It's a tough deal. But my guy, that first meeting with the NICU doctor, if you ain't had it yet, buckle your seatbelt. It's all I got to tell you. Because he's going to tell you the good stuff that can happen, and he's going to tell you, or he or she is going to tell you the bad stuff that can happen too.

So just buckle your seatbelt, prepare to cry. It's okay. And not just cry, prepare to weep for what may come, and then get out of there and figure out life after it is. But the people that work in there are, angels on this earth. And 10 years later, you'll be watching the president of the United States try to roller skate.

Yeah, doing old chicken wings. A man looked like a windmill out there. He was doing it. I did ate through a feeding two for the first year of his life, and now he roller skates like this. Because he is. A roller skates the way his dad dances. Arms out, baby.

Arms out. Second Corinthians four. We're going to go 16 all the way through 18. therefore we do not lose heart though outwardly we are wasting away yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day for our light and momentary troubles are achieving us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all so we fix our eyes not on what is seen but what is unseen since what is seen is temporary but what is unseen is eternal