Duck Call Room - Uncle Si's Famous Tea Cup Might Be Gone for Good

Episode Date: April 5, 2022

Si finally addresses why his iconic tea tumbler has gone missing. Godwin convinces everyone to talk without using their tongues. Martin's new shirt with a ruler on it has John-David completely captivated . John-David has to take a new route when he takes his kids to school just to avoid flags with expletives. Si talks about what our military fights for and how he was treated when he returned from Vietnam. And the boys have advice on what verse to use when you officiate a wedding and how to know it's the right time to have kids. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

People are really upset about you, by the way. Oh, me? Yeah. I'm happy for it. You got rid of your green glass and you're using that thing. I mean, I've gotten so many emails about that. What happened to those glass? Is it correct?

I love it. Hey, I've upgraded. Does a straw have one hole or two holes? True. That's interesting. Oh, what was that? Somebody was talking about they drilled a hole using cane and sand and Who said this?

Cain and sand. We're literally going to have to talk about this tea glass. Look. It's crazy. Yeah, I think it was stone. What? Drilling. Drilling a hole in something of hard rock,

and they used a carrying piece of carrying with sand and some kind of fine rock. And they actually drilled their holes through this thing and hung it on the neckets. And it's the hardest rock. It's the hardest rock that is. Oh, I was on that podcast about the meteorite. That's what I was going.

You listen to a podcast? Well, no, no, no, no. Every once in a while, it just, you know, it happened. It happened. It popped in my head, and I was wondering why we had talked about that, and who had talked about it. The man retains information.

He's like one of them people that know everything that ever had, like they never forget. Yeah, but I can't remember where I've done it. The problem with him is sometimes. he gets some confused together. He gets two things put together. Yeah, put him in the wrong story. But he remembers all of it.

And by the time it's out, it's 95%. Yeah. Hey, I'm just saying. No, no, it was a hard rock. It's one of these. It's not for eating. It's for looking at. Well, it's one of the hardest rocks there is.

Diamonds? No, it wasn't a diamond, I don't think. But anyway, they actually drilled a hole using a piece of cane, sand, and gritty rock. That makes sense. I mean, it's essentially turning it into a drill bit when you add the grit. A piece of cane and sand and, you know, river rock. Yeah.

That's like them boys, I don't know where it was. They made this drill bit like a hair, as big as a hair. Yeah. And it could drill through anything without breaking. Was the size of a rabbit? I mean, not, yeah. And I mean, it was little. They sent it over to China and say,

ha, ha, look what we do. And hey, China drilled a hole in that. Yeah, and sent it back. Yeah. And tell me, hey, what do you think about this? Okay, we drill. You thought you had to let's drill bit, but hey, we drilled a hole through your drill bit.

How did y'all both know that story? I don't know. Because it's a joke. No, no, it was a joke. Oh. Was it? I don't remember. Yeah, I don't remember. When I heard it, it was a joke.

something starts out, you know. Where was the punch line? Well, the punch line was that, hey, they sent it to China, and China drill to hold through their smallest drill bit and send them back to them. Oh, did he really? You need an upgrade? Yeah, he didn't use the right inflection.

Oh, Godwin was setting us up for a joke the whole time? Well, of course, I don't even know when Godwin's being serious anymore. I'm just waiting for a time. Oh, I have heard it before. It's always safe to assume he's not. Yeah. That's the, yeah, you know what you call a fish with no eyes? They're called.

No fish. A what, a fish? Still a fish. You still a fish? I like the fish. That's a good one. Yeah. That's with no eyes.

Hey, all right, well, now that we're on this, I'm going to go with it. Jeffrey from Van Burenne, Arkansas, Godwin, how does a dad joke become a dad joke? How does a dad joke become a dad joke? What is a, why do they got to be dad joke? There's a certain level of cornyness you have to achieve to reach dad joke level. And let's just say that you are nailing them. That's just what they call them. But how does a dad joke become a dad joke?

It's apparent. What? That's a parent. There you go. I like that one. I starred that one in the old email. Oh, just stop. That's just as bad as the astronaut that had claustophobia.

Hold on, hold on. Well, you call the what? I didn't call it. just the astronaut with colostovia he just needed some space godwin i love you this is probably one of my favorite parts of the week period he's on fire oh my goodness we'd have godwin on every day of the week but he'd run out of material so we got it we got to give him seven days to get built back up on material you know i was thinking if you know they sell cow tongues in the store to eat Mm-hmm.

Yeah. So they can't go moo no more. They just go, oh. Mm. You think that's right? You think they could say mood? I just... How come you can't talk without a tongue?

I just hope they don't cut the cow's tongue. You still got a mile. I've never tried them. And why do they split a bird's tongue so he can talk? What? Yeah. They split a bird's tongue. They split a bird's tongue before you can call.

Like a parrot? Yeah, especially a crow. Who split it? Who does that? Hey, whoever's got the part that they're training the top? Oh, like to say, like, hello! Yeah. It's interesting.

I once met a parrot that said hello. It was a good day. Yeah, you can't do it. It's just a... Pirates and parrots. I just grabbed his tongue and tried to tell. It's a very... important muscle when it comes to speaking.

Why can't you do it? You got a mouth. Well, because your tongue, it does all the things in the mood. Why could you blow a duck call without a tongue? See there? Wasn't sound like much. Hey, look, the reason you can't talk about a tongue? Tea break.

Okay, is because your tongue has to hit the roof of your mouth to be able to verbalize. If you, eh, nope, I tried to keep it. Everybody's trying to do it now. Yep. There's people.

driving down the interstate listening to us right now that are trying to talk without using their tongue it's not going to work people hen yeah it's hen if you don't use your tongue hen gawin was almost famous yesterday was he for a completely different reason yeah he about got to take a ride in a nadir you ain't lying neither like that old boy in a red truck torn at us he got a new truck by the way. You know our boy, Reed Timmer, the extreme meteorologist? Oh, yeah. He was at Gobwin's exit yesterday video and a nadir going across the interstate.

You don't want to see that guy. Was it a big nader or a little nater? Big. Big nater? They all big, ain't they? No. Even the little ones. No, some of them are little whippersnappers.

All they do is just a little whippoor-knoppers still send you to Oz if you get too close to them. They seem big to me. Yeah, I wasn't even clicking my heels. No, no, hey, what's funny is, look, is the distance off of the ground that they sometimes go. We had one when I lived in Alabama, and it went through a pine thicket, a young pine thicket. It was about, say, 14 feet high, and about seven foot is where it went and just snapped them. just like toothpicks. Wherever it went through was just a solid line

that you could see where it snapped them off. Oh yeah, it looked like a lawnmower. Yeah. One of them brush cutters. Yeah, bush hogs. Seven feet high for two miles. I was watching the footage for any of gobbins, thunder and herd of animals out there to make sure.

One of those. We needed to go find. I left them in the house just. I said they made her stay in. Oh, but look, our thoughts and prayers are out there with everybody that got ripped by them. Yeah, Hodge, Louisiana got it pretty bad. Hodge, our buddies over in Tallulah got hit. Wow.

Whole state of Mississippi, there were something like 50 active tornado warnings at one time. That's amazing. You know. There's a town in Texas below college station. When my daughter was going there, we went and ate, and they went through. and the whole town, I think it was in the 20s. It was a small town.

But a tornado come through there, and the town was gone. All that was left of this town was concrete flabs. It actually jerked. Okay, you got to think about it. It actually, all, every kind of pipe, PVC metal pipes and everything.

It snapped them out of the concrete. Wow. So you'd say that was a big one. So, yeah. That ain't a whippersnapper. All it was left, okay? All it was left of that town. Look, and they never found any of the debris.

The whole town was gone. All it was left was concrete slaps. Wow. That's what they say happened to Ears, if I ain't mistaken. What I heard. Do you know anything about that? Way back. No.

No, Eres. That's sore spelled backers. I did know that. I used to live. Well, I had a Calhoun telephone, I mean, Chatham. Chatham telephone number and an ear's address. Chatham has its own area code? You better believe it.

And the town was what, Arris? ERIS. ERIS. It's right there on the way to Caney. You go through it all time. Yeah. Well, it must be real little. And you better not go 41.

Speed limit's 40. Oh, speed trip. Go 41. Oh, born and five. down there. He'll get you. Is he down? He'll be.

He'll put the, uh, sirene on you. Woo. Anyway, let's take our first. I got a thousand strides during that. Did you? Yeah, a thousand sides coming up. Keep pedaling that cube and we'll talk about it. All right.

Look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means? That means more outside cooking. And y'all know. We love to eat beef around here. And that's what, because of our friends over at Triedales beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good?

It's so good. Our friend, Sao Robertson would say, buy on the grill! Look, before we got Tritels, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day.

And you never really know where that beef comes from, but with Tritels beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Tritels comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch, so they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch

and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Tritale's beef.

I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat. She isn't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. Well, is anybody watching the final four? Final four or what?

Basketball. This will come out after. Be careful. They say it's going to be the most people watching the final four that's ever watched it. Whatever you say about it, This is going to come out after. So any bold predictions you make, people are going to either laugh or cheer you. I will just ask you.

Let's record four different winners and then we'll pick which one we put it. Ooh. Are you ready? You got Villanova against Kansas. He's a basketball phenom. Okay. And then you've got, which I knew this was going on. That game between two teams you'd never heard of them.

And then you've got now. And I'm going to tell you why they'll watch it. Yeah. They're watching because Duke is playing North Carolina. That's Coach Kay's potential last game. That's right. It's his last dance, boys. He can't go out.

Potential. The only thing I'm worried about, whether to use a fend span or a ball head. He's talking about Jigs, but I one ain't watching no finals. That's right. He's talking about how he's trying to figure out how to catch a copy. Well, who do you think is going to win? Go for it. Right now, one take.

I will catch Cropie every time I go. I have no idea on Kansas and Villanova. He doesn't know. Okay. But I'm going to go with Coach Kaye on North Carolina and Duke. So he's got Duke versus. The game to what will be North Carolina and Duke. Well, yeah.

So there will be whoever's got the ball before the buzzer rings will win the game. He is calling a buzzer-beater. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's going to be it's a buzzer. All right. You going to put any action on that? Oh, Coach. I'm going to say Duke and Kansas,

and then Kansas ruins everything for Coach K. Because everybody I root for loses. Oh, you actually think Kansas is going to beat Villanova? I wanted Miami to win. That went real south real quick. What did you say? Oh, I was hoping St. Peter. Melanoma.

Melanoma. Villanova. Villanova. Villanova. It's a school. It's a school. basketball school. Wildcats.

They're always in the plow. They're the wildcats like you. You're like Kansas is always in a plow. Fugly. And Nova won, what, two years ago, three years ago? I'm not sure. They're always in it. Aren't they the wild cats?

I don't even know. Yeah, they're the wild cats. They either. But you're saying it's going to be good. You played basketball for a little bit. I played one time and I run down to the one end and they took off and went to the other side. By the time he made it to the end, they're running to the other end. Yeah. Yeah.

I just sit there and waited for them to get back. That's right. He thought it was a silly game and said, hey, I'll just wait down. Do y'all come back to this? When you look like us, you rest on offense, not on defense. Defense is the only thing we bring to the table. I can't shoot. I can't foul on offense.

I was good at that, too. I can't run very much. I really can't jump. I was just lucky I was a little taller than most of other kids in high school. Ain't much. That basketball ain't. So you got. Quit down.

watching around you Duke to win it all? Duke won it all. I hope Duke takes it all away. But is that what you think? I mean, we can hope. I just know this. That's why I said what I said. He already made the prediction of lifetime.

I have no idea, you know, Villanova and Kansas, you know, that will probably be a runaway one way of the other, is my prediction. So blowout. A blowout, either way. Okay, now I don't know which one's going to happen. don't think Villanova can blow anybody out.

Do you think Jason Anderson's going to blow Eli two minutes chances for a championship? Sir, what sport are we speaking of? Motorcraft. You threw a name in there that I had no idea who it was. I think he's got a chance. Him. He's got one. Oh, Mike wins one more race.

He can't mathematically catch him. I will probably only watch Duke in North Carolina. And then he's giving up? Yeah. That's all he wants to watch. We should go. It's in the Superdome. You want to go?

No. Okay, never mind. I had driving four hours to five hours of New Orleans just to watch a basketball game. That's true. If we were going down there to Josh Galt's place, okay, and catching redfish, then I'd go. He'd go. He'd go. He'd got to New Orleans, but only for the fishing.

That's right. Only for the fix or for the blue wings. wing till. Blue wing teal. Long time till we can do that again. I know it. Hey, God, man stone always make that trip.

Okay. For the blue wing teal and the redfin. That's kind of this fault. God, when earlier you said crappie was manna from heaven. They are. What do you actually think the manna in the Bible was? If you're not familiar with the story,

God just gave them food every morning. It was just sitting outside their door while they were wondering through the wilderness. It was some kind of bread, but it was pretty awesome. It was bread? With fresh quail. That's true. I forgot about that. Fresh quail.

I think it was like, I just always wondered what it was. I'd be sorry, though. Oh, here's something for you. I think it was biscuit. Hey. Biscuit and gravy. Biscuit and gravy. Without quail.

Oh, no. Quail cannot fly. What? What? According to our scientists, quail cannot fly. You know why? Why? Weight distribution against wings span.

They're too heavy, their wings are too small to support them in flight. It's what they say. But I got news for our scientists. You boys need to go to Purvis, Mississippi, with me, or long-lead plantation. And I will disprove that theory that y'all come up with. Okay, okay, it can fly.

What scientists are saying this? All are scientists. No, scientists. This says quail can fly. Well, hey, they said... About 100 yards. 100 yards. No, that's wrong.

They can go further than that? How far can they go? Like, they ain't migrating. Out of sight. 100 yards out of sight. They don't get very far when they're stoned in there because we got... He's got a 12-gauge. They got a 28-gates.

They ain't going to make it far. You know, the guy told me, he said, hey, we got one cubby out here. He said, we fix it go to it. He said, it's got a hundred birds in it. I said, what? A hundred. He said, oh, yeah.

He said, this covey has got a hundred quail. So look, I got my little 28 gauge. It's late in the evening, and the sun is just about going down, okay, and I'm walking right straight towards the sun, so I can't see. Well, the dog's point, bust the covey, okay, they jump up, and I shoot one time. I can't see nothing. So I shoot one time. I should have a headshot three.

But I didn't shoot at one time. And Philip was with me and Philip said, hey, why didn't you shoot the other two? And I said, well, you're first shot. You killed three. And I said, well, I couldn't even see nothing. I heard them when they got up and just shot where they was at. Yeah.

But it was 100 quail, okay. So you can take and raise pin birds and turn them loose if you've got the good habitat for quail, and they will make it then become wild. In the interest of... Can they fly when it's wet? I guess. I just know that, hey, regular pen rays,

if it rains, you don't hunt them. Don't hunt them. In the interest of gun safety, folks, we caution you to use one of the rules of gun safety, know your target and what's beyond it. If the sun's in your eyes, don't keep shooting. Okay, hey, no one of those in front of me. I do that.

He's a seasoned battery. I just want you to know how it sounds. Yeah, I shot, couldn't see nothing. Well, no, no. Hey, we actually had a dog. Poor wording. Look, we actually had a dog that would. I heard a yelp.

Look, that would actually climb fences and go get quail if you shot one over a fence. A dog. Now we're trespassing. He don't bark when he let's climb a fence into the next break. We'll be back. I have a question. What's that? Very important.

I got a very important. Martin, is that ruler on your sleeve accurate? I like it a lot. Oh, I don't know. It looks about right. It's what? Martin's wearing a shirt that has a fish all the way down his arm, but it's also on a ruler. It's a spotted bath.

It can't answer. That's a keeper. That ain't no spotted bath. Yeah, it is. No, it ain't. Here we go. You got an under bite. Yeah.

Isn't that a, uh... He got an under bite. That's him. I can't think of the. the name I'm thinking about right now. Gavin said, take my picture. Galvin was lipping my shirt. Yeah, I don't know.

I saw it the other day and I thought it was cool. That is cool. I just thought people should start putting a ruler on everything. That ain't a bath, though, is it? Or is it? Yeah, it's a bad. Yeah, a spotted bag. I saw an ice chest with the river.

What's that other fish that's the other one? I don't know. It ain't a bass. Not them in the north. Walleye? Walleye. That ain't here. That's what I thought.

that was walleye no that's a bass okay I caught some of them too that's about a 14 and a quarter inch here he legal you keep him keep him about two and a half pound you knocked the sides off of him yeah about two and a half pounds is the size of martin's arm hey and he's about a two and a half pounder there you go martin's arm weighs way more than two and a half pounds martin how much is that fish weighs one on your arm a 14 and a half inch spot about two two and a half yeah probably two and three quarter yeah two and three not three well Justin Connell one of tournament catching a bunch of them thing but he tastes good oh yeah that's spotted bass that's a spotted bass that's good that's good that's good laying on his back we're kidding too far deep in what's on my shirt

I didn't know it was going it's a cool shirt I thought it was a cool shirt with a ruler on what's that in front of his mouth is he blowing something out that is a logo that is a lulling logo and two more inch is a freeboard if you need it. Yep. I just, I've recently thought they should start putting, if you can put a ruler on something, you should just do it. Sure.

You need to measure stuff. You never have a ruler on you. And that phone thing don't work, right? I actually call a brim that was one. Then when you got stopped by the top, they'd say, are you tall or small? I actually call a brim that was one foot long. You didn't catch up.

12 inch? Huh? 12 inch? No. Baker's dozen. Bluegill? Nope. No.

I don't know really what he is. I call him out of the Frank Rock River in Alabama. Uh-huh. He's got red eyes. He looks like a cheeky pen, okay, cross between a cheeky pen and a small-mouthed bass. Because you've got red eyes. Rock bass.

Shadow bass? I don't know what they are. I really don't. They have a big mouth? Yeah. Yeah, they've got a mouth about like small mouth. That's him. Yeah, affectionately known as a goggle eye in these parts.

Nope, nope, nope, nope. No, that's what I'm saying. Everybody that catches one of them calls him a goggle. There ain't a goggle-off. There's a goggle-off. I know because there's war mouth. Is it this? Uh-oh.

Uh-oh. No, that's not, that's the wrong color. He's got red eyes. Yeah, that may be him because he's got red eye. Rock bag. And he does look like a cheeky field. Is that a rock bass? That would be a rock bass according to Google image search number one.

Number one. I know one thing. He ain't good? Oh, yeah, and Paint Rock River is full of them. Oh, yeah. All them little rivers. Okay, look, because you're talking about, hey, when you're talking about one foot brim, that's a home.

Yeah. One foot brim. Well, it's not a brim, it's a bath. You know why a nose can't be 12 inches? Why a nose can't be 12 inches? There's been to be a foot. Does it be a foot? I got one.

I finally got one. I mean. I'm so happy. Well, was that six-pound cheeky pin that you just had up there? There we go. I'm looking at rock bass. Hold it. To see if there's ever been one of foot.

A chinky pen. I don't. It's just Google internet. And Arizona? What is this here? A bath? That's just a regular old bass. Okay.

I thought it was a chinky pen. It was called out of the Laker-A-R-A-Ras-O-Lah-Bish-Y-Py. Paula calls them chicken pens. Chicky pin. I know. Paula calls them chicken pins. Oh, chicken pins? What's that?

Well, we could just call them red ears. Oh, no. Cail crackers. They're the most fun to catch if, you know, you're talking about making a lion sing running through the water. Hmm? The lion's singers. It's springtime, boys. We're all talking about.

It's time to go fishing. We should just stop the podcast now. Let's go do the podcast on a boat. Or on the bank. Hey. Not a bank. We got boats right here. Sitting on top of a brush pipe.

Yeah, that's right. I now am the proud owner of a kayak with two seats on it. I can carry that thing wherever I want. Just pick it up. You got the flippers that's... I got the flippers. You want to go? You sit on the front.

I'll paddle you around all over. But I got a buddy that does it. You got to sing when you do it. Well, you got to sing. Oh, you got to sing. Oh, he's talking about like the Venice Canal boat. Oh, I don't stand up on kayak. Yeah, you got a singer.

You ain't got to stand up to sing. Well, if you want to go on a kayak, I'll take you. I got two seats. Coyette with the flippers. Coyac vision's fun. The flippers are fun. It's not a row if somebody knows what they're doing. Mm-hmm.

It's got them pedals and then you got the flippers on the bottom. It's a way better investment than a 24-foot pontoon boat. Never buy one of those people. I needed one of them back when we fished Black Bile up in Vivian. A 24-foot pontoon boat? No. A many-tree kayak. A little kayak.

Yeah. Just drive around Dobby, cricket. Oh, hey. No. Tell them broken tail. I wonder why people think he baked over. Up in all them

cypress trees on Blackbile. All over the place. What? What's the story on the hat? That is. I don't know, Robin Hood. Hey, no, that story. Some people sent that to me.

That's from Germany. That's a Jaeger. A Yeager hat. It's got a maller, Drake, feather and a woody feather in it. Yeah, a hunter's hat. They're called Yeggers. Yeagers.

Yeah. And you have a uniform you put on when you hunt. That hat's part of the uniform. It's called drill tree. All right. Let's take a break. We'll be back. I was going to say when gobbling and Saib,

we're talking about Eiris and chat them all ago. You'll know you're in ERIS when you pass the flag. that says something Biden. It does not say go. It does not say go, Joe. See, it's got an expletive. It's right on the side of the road. Have I told you?

On the way to the lake. I go a different way to school now to take my kids to school? No. They can read. My wife is right. I miss so much, I guess. Yeah. Yeah, you ain't got much situation.

Well, I say, I'll pay attention to them. I don't. It's like seeing when I'm driving. I'm watching idiots on the road. like two miles from my house. There's two big old flags just waving in the wind. Just the bomb of all bombs about the president. Just right there.

And I'm like, I can't, we go bad every morning. And a couple times. What's that mean? Well, and it's like, with luck, they haven't seen it. Because I forgot about it. A couple of, the hundred past first time I said, did that just, are they just waving that in the air? And I'm like, yep.

So then I went on the way home from church the other day. I forgot. We're about to go past it. And all of a sudden there was a bear on the other side of the road. I said, look at the bear. Look over there. They're like, we didn't see a bear. I'm like, ah, it must have been mistaken.

I was just making sure they weren't reading the signs of the people. Why did we, how do we get to the point of like, let's just openly drop bombs for everybody driving by? My kids can read. Yeah, I don't know. It's a, I'll tell you. And then the kid on the news. You saw it. You sent it to me.

Oh, yeah. The kid in South Louisiana looks to be somewhere between the ages of maybe 10 and 13. I don't know. It's hoods on, so it's hard to tell. It's hard to tell. Small kid. Yeah. Who is wearing a sweatshirt that was bought specifically for him.

Yeah, it ain't big. It ain't running large. No, he didn't like get daddy's t-shirt. It's a youth-sized shirt. Yeah. So he's been wearing that thing. and probably wearing at school or around his buddies or something. And it has that same word with the president's name on.

Like the Let's Go Brandon thing was funny. Right. It was funny. There's no doubt about it. Still is kind of. Pretty funny. Yeah. But we can't just be, we got to have some cooth to us, right?

Is that the right word? You got to think, when we were kids, the worst things you saw was a little guy taking a leak on like a Chevy emblem. Or a Ford emblem, depending on your brand allegiance. you know they made them both or a dodge or something the people making them stickers didn't care that kid peed on everything i mean it didn't matter if you if you hadn't allegiance to it he took a leak on it it didn't matter so and that but that was it you didn't you didn't go down the word of publicly displaying cuss words just and bad ones too like real but like they're in cuss words there is a level there's a hierarchy there's a it starts with that one it starts with g that's the

top of the food chain. And then we drop down to the bombs. And then, you know, you get into different... Then you get into the gutter. Then you get into excrements and everything else. What's his parents like? I don't know his parents. I'm going to say Stonts Republican.

That or Tea Party? We don't know. It's going to be my guess. However. Or they're so liberal that... No, that's not it. Not in Plackham's Parish. Not in Placomons.

But it's fine. It's fine to disagree. It's fine to disagree. It's fine to not like the person who's in office. It's fine to not like a myriad of things, but you don't have to express your level of unlikeness with expletives for the whole world to see. Some of us don't want to see it. You know, me, I don't care.

I'm mature enough to know that you're doing this for a laugh. But there's better ways that you're. humor than that. But for a lot of kids that you're opening, that may be the first time they ever see that word. And then you're forcing a parent to have to have an explanation of why that's not okay to say at school tomorrow. And, you know, why this and why that?

So like, just keep it to yourself. Don't put it on the side of the highway going to Caney Lake. It's there. Hey, Vent Road. Three of them. For their self. Do what now? They have no respect for their self.

There you go. That'll preach it. That'll preach. I mean, that's terrible. It is weird. And they probably think. You're not changing anybody's mind. Nobody that's driving down the road and then sees that goes, you know what?

He's right. I'm going to vote differently next time. You've convinced me, sir. Bravo. Like, that's never happened. No. All they see is, okay, now I don't like this person because they're so mean and ridiculous. and so now and it goes both ways by the way they probably think oh absolutely and there's

there's people that do stuff on the other side and i'm like okay i'm not i'm not this isn't a pick on one side of the aisle here this no not at all both sides they probably think we're weird just as strongly oh they you know we i know i'm weird yeah yeah you know and they probably now are taking exception to us talking about why they shouldn't you know why i mean it's just you're forcing something that doesn't have to be forced let people discover that a problem on their own. I don't get it. Instead of just blatantly,

because what are you solving? That's what I'm saying. What point has been driven home that you didn't like him? Pretty sure if we'd talk for 20 seconds, I could have probably figured that part of it out. On either way, because you're going to let somebody know what you like and you don't like. Pretty quick.

Yeah, you ain't Switzerland. So, you know, I'm just saying, like. Those old Swiss. They make great chocolate, though. So I'd be real quiet over here. You got one in flags? Yeah. No.

Yeah. We all know where size does. He ain't got nothing else. It's virgil. Okay. Berger language, okay. And hey. Yeah.

It is what it is. It's crude. Do you all have anything like that around NOM? They have big signs up everywhere saying. Well, I guess they did because if Forrest Gump has any kind of realization to it, when they did that rally and that old boy started to show. out in the F bomb from the roofs. Well, I was actually lucky that when I came back,

nobody got in my face. Yeah. I've done went and gone through hell. Okay. More than that. Okay. And then somebody that's staying back here and has been safe, and I'm the one out there fighting that gave you the right to run your mouth.

Okay. Great. And even in that regard, Like I'm looking up something. You know what? I'm going to have to do at the end of this. You know what the Buffalo said to his son when he left? I can't wait.

I have no idea. Hold on. Bison. Oh, you give me one more second. Got him. That's good. Bison. What are you looking up, Martin?

No, I got an email from a young lady named Courtney. What up, Courtney? Where's you from? Who? It doesn't say. I don't think. It's okay, Courtney. No, it doesn't say.

Can we guess? Sure. America. Yeah. Let's go with that. But anyway, she wanted us to wish her husband, or no, her fiancé, Danny, a happy 33th birthday. Happy, happy, happy, happy. 33?

I'm going to be 33 in May. Yeah. Danny, what's up, 1989? And he's already, he's a veteran. He was in the Marines, joined at 18, and did two combat tours by the time he was 21. So, Danny, happy birthday. But more importantly. Thank you for your.

service, sir. Thank you very much. There we go. And welcome home. Absolutely. And welcome home. We appreciate what you did for our country. Amen.

So we'll get into the official email bag right after this. We're back. And we're back. We should do like a song, sing along. Dream dog your ticket out. Welcome back. Welcome back. I don't know.

Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome back. Oh, is that? Oh, that was welcome back, Carter. I thought, and then you went to Gap Band. That's it. No, I didn't. Hey, Cotter.

B. Cotter. B. Cotter. I'm not Carta. Cotter. And thought that was the thing? Learned something new every day. You're really close. Everybody, poor lesson. Always learned. You need to change. just his spelling of his name. That would be tough on an eight-year-old.

I don't think that's a good call. No, go ahead. All right, I'll do it. Anyways. Hello at dot-callroom.com. That's the email address. Hit me with some emails. I read like 70 this morning.

There's 70. Oh, we get. Where do you work? I don't know. Most of the time I'm reading these on the toilet. Good. Most of them are very nice. Oh?

Except for people from Cincinnati. All right, Dane. I'm sorry. I've got to go to Cincinnati one day and go to a football game. Sanctanati. What's in there, Johnny, do? All right, this one was interesting to me. All right, go ahead and read it.

Dane. Where's Dane from? Sent from his iPhone. Anywhere. Big fan of the show. A couple episodes ago, we were answering questions from the mailbag. And it was kind of a heavy episode when we talked about, you know, all the close guys to Jesus, the apostles, they all ended up boiled alive, heads chopped off.

You know, the closest people to Jesus, they didn't get all these great blessings here on earth. They had a pretty tough life. You look at Paul, shipwreck, snake bit and all that stuff. And he said, he heard us talking about that, and can we talk a little more about that, like, where is that mentioned in the Bible? So here's the thing, Dane.

Acts 122 specifically mentions James, brother John, King Herod killed him. But the rest of it isn't in the Bible. It is just historical fact. And some of it's kind of here and there. But most of that is just history of the world. And that the Christians around that time were persecuted, and they have records of what they did to Jesus' apostles.

So it's not like the Bible was just a made-up story of fake people. All those people you read about were really. really on this earth and it's in history. So I just thought I would like to clarify that. Anybody else in anything? That was just me. I think you covered it. I think I covered it. Secular history. Yeah. So, and I always

think that's super important for like people that don't believe. Like, what do you not believe? Because like history, every historian out there says, oh no, all that happened. There's just this thing like, Jesus died on the cross for sure. Did he come back? That's where

people try and like refute you. Okay, then, you know So I just thought we'd clear that up Just for funsies Funny people believe in Alexander the Great They never seen him They believe he was here I never saw him

I don't even know anybody named Alexander I know a couple people last name All right anyway So I just wanted to clear that up from a man Dane Dane thanks for the email All right here's a good Here's what I found interesting and I had to read it twice

because I think I read it wrong the first time. He's going to be marrying his best friend in October. That's a good thing. Plot twist, he's not the one getting married. He's the officiant.

Oh. He's performing said ceremony. And this is all I got, his name's Dr. Holiday. Doc Holliday. Yeah. Okay. So he's wondering if we have any recommendations

or any verses. that he should use. Recommendation. I've always wanted to marry two people. I think it would be fun. None of my friends have ever asked me, though. Recommendations. If you were to marry two people.

I'd know this. It's not my time to give a sermon. We're going to keep this baby quick. We're going to get this deal done because they ain't here to hear me talk. And let's figure this out and move on. That's my recommendation. Have you ever married a couple?

Have you ever officiated a wedding? No, I'm not qualified to do that. You have to have a... Well, you can get it done real... I can have you qualified in the next seven minutes these days. Why do you want to... Why do you have to be qualified? Got to be ordained for it to be legal.

In this state, anyways, I don't know exactly if it's everything. I didn't know the words to say. I got to be an ordained minister or something. Means you filled out a little piece of paperwork that says you're bona fide. He's bona fide. I'm the same person before I filled it out. Yeah, but you've got to have the paperwork, okay, to marry someone. You probably got to pay like $7 to the state or something.

I think it's like 50. But I'm like Martin, okay, because I'll give you a little short story. A good friend of mine, got a daughter, okay, she's falling in love, okay, they're going to get married. The father goes to this young lady, we're in Europe at the time, and says daughter and son-in-law, future son-in-law, here's what I will do for you. I will give you $100,000 cash,

or I will throw you a big wedding and pay for everything, which is about what you'll spend if you throw a big wedding. Big big. Yeah, big, big. $100,000? Yeah, $100,000 cash. That wouldn't be, you're having no fancy wedding. Yeah.

Well, hey, here's what I would have told the boy if he was my son. Hey, forget the big wedding. Go down to the cold aisle. Take the $100,000 invested in Apple. Something, okay, that will... You know, you will have that in the bank to fall back on in hard times? Mm-hmm. Okay.

But go to a justice's peace, and like Martin said, Let's make this short sweet to the point. How much do you're going to cost me for me to say, hey, that woman is my wife from now on. $25. You could have taken. There you're $25, sir. Do the ceremony.

And that deal, you could have taken $100, spent $20 on a pretty big party, and everybody would have remembered. Now, here's why I'm saying this, folks. If you're thinking about getting married, okay, and someone off the father offers to pay, give you $100,000 cash, take the $100,000 cash. Whose father-in-law has a hundred? Okay, and hey, because guess what happened to that young lady and that young man?

They were married one year and divorced. And my buddy, he spent $150,000 for that big wedding. That lasted 12 months. Well, now we're all sad. Oh, no, no. I appreciate it. Jeez. All right.

So don't have side of your wedding. That's the advice. I can give. Hey, I'm just doing it like it is. Hey. Keep it quick. Keep it important. Keep it about them.

Yeah. Make one joke. Get out of there. What's I say on the last one? Love's the most important anyway. That's it. Yep. Go look up at the aisle all did.

Yeah. Stick to that part about love and move on. Google. Google Al Robertson's lessons on love is the greatest. There you go. Yeah. And there's a reason for that. That's what you dare for anyway.

Get to that. and get out of there. Get out of it. Say I do, let them kiss, let them throw bird seed, all that kind of stuff and move on. You can't do that anymore. And remember this. It's the birds.

You made a covenant between three of you. The man, the woman, and God. Say that. Okay. There's your advice. There's your advice. It's a three-way deal here. Okay, you're making, first of all,

you're making a covenant with the woman and the man. Okay, but the most important part is, you also have made a covenant with God that you will stay together to a death do you part. Go on there. Preach it. Well, that was good. You're serious business.

Another email? Yeah, we do it quick. All right. This one said Bucky's slash life advice. Oh, you're interested in Bucking. No, I'm in. Jacob from Greenville, North Carolina. He went to Buckees in Daytona Beach, Florida, which,

actually makes me so mad that they have one and we don't. Please, Buckies, if you're listening, Downing Pines Exx at West Monroe, Louisiana. West Monroe, Louisiana. So they went to Disney World for a delayed honeymoon, and then they went to Buckees, and I'm just going to be honest, everything they put here sounds like they had more fun at Buckees. It's just the greatest place on Earth. But now for life advice, they've been married for right about nine months. However, they've been together since that's a very specific date.

June 23rd, 2017. They're wanting to settle down and have kids. We just don't know when the right time is. We're both 24 years old. When did you guys know when the right time was? Stop laughing at this man's joke. We want to not joke, question. It's not a joke.

It's a question. We want to make sure we are mentally and spiritually focused on our decision of having kids. Hope to hear from you guys. Jacob, you're about to. Sy, why are you laughing? Because that took me back 40 years. Okay, when I prayed to God, give me patience. Okay?

And what he did, God was up there laughing the whole time probably. You know, my wife becomes pregnant. And that's after all the so-called doctors had told her she would never have a child of her own. But anyway, okay, trust me, if you, y'all, you do what you got to do if you want children, then God will take care of the rest. Yeah. Don't wait until you can afford it because you never go to. Hey, not only that and tell me, okay, how do I get ready for this?

Okay, yeah, am I ready to be a father? Nope. The answer to that is, no, you will never be ready. That's on the job training. Okay. This is, hey, this is, uh, Yeah, this is one of these fly-by-your-pants deals. Yeah.

Okay. You will learn once you have a child, you will learn as life goes on. Life is going to happen, and then you're going to learn from it. That's right. Preach. I've always said there's two things everybody sucks at. Marriage and parenthood. Because you've never been either.

So you just got to figure them out as you go. Do the best you can do. Roll with the thing. Here's the thing I'll say on this end with him, it ain't your plan anyway, Hammer. There it is. Just let her bump. The good Lord, it doesn't been written for you, buddy. That's the best advice you'll ever get.

Yeah. You ain't the one driving anyway. We think we have some control over this day because we can't avoid it. There's technology and whatever you want to do to not get pregnant. But when it's on, it's on. It's not your choice. It's not. you might say, oh, we should start trying.

It might take a long time. Or you can say, I guess we'll stop preventing. And two weeks later, boom. You just don't know what it is. So it's really, you ain't in control of it. If you're talking about it together, you're ready. Yeah. That's a great word.

There you go. If y'all are ready. Been together, 2017, that's five years. Been married nine months. you spent $63 at Buckees. You're ready, man. Yeah, you're ready because, hey, you had, you had your honeymoon.

Oh, yeah. I got to go to Buckees. Wait until you take you. In Daytona. I got to put gas in my truck and boat. Last time I went to Buckees, I spent $63 on stuffed animals that look like a beaver. So, Jacob, it's expensive.

Hey, don't badmouthed beavers. Oh, boy, here we go. They're one of the coolest little animals in the world. They are. Well, what are we going to send them out of here on? Well, I'm going to send them out of here on. Well, I'm going back. My man asks for verses, right?

Yeah. And there's an obvious one for giving a sermon on, not a sermon, for officiating a wedding. And that would be Ephesians 5, 21 through 33. I'm not going to read all that because it's really long. Everybody, I encourage you, go look it up. But I'm going to read one very important to the husbands. I want all the husbands out there to listen.

Ephesians, what did I say? I think I said three. Ephesians 525, Husbands love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy cleansing her by washing with water

through the word and to present her to himself as a radiant church without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish but holy and blameless. We are called to love our wives the way Christ loved the church and you've heard us here say it before.

He loved you whether you wanted him to or not. And he died on a cross for you and went through torture for you and didn't even have to become human and he did that because I'm pretty sure he was all right before he came down here and he went through a really bad deal for you. And then after that, three days later, that man started breathing again. So that's what we're called to do for our wives. I'm going to go tell Allison to listen to this one. That's a joke. But husbands, love your wives. That's what I'm sending you out of here with today. Amen. We'll see y'all next time.