Duck Call Room - Uncle Si's Favorite Pickup Line

Episode Date: July 6, 2021

Si and JD reveal their winning lines guaranteed to get a girl to go out with you, and the world may never be the same. But first, Godwin and Si can't get enough of the sourdough loaf JD's wife, Alyson, baked for them. A fan sends in Si's yearbook pics. Godwin is all about a 16-ounce bacon steak and the Martin-inspired sandwich he calls "Godwin's Goodies." Si tries to keep JD from going negative on his wife's cooking. The boys are seriously disturbed by almond milk and intrigued by deer milk. Si talks about his family's smokehouse and how he and his dad robbed a beehive. And the boys tackle roadkill and offer relationship advice to an engaged couple and a pair of retirees. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

So did you bring the leftovers? No, they leftovers. Speaking of bringing thing. He made it funny. Yeah, there's no such thing. You brought some bread. Uh-oh. My wife made a fresh sourdough loaf, but where's the trumpet?

Uh-oh. Well, I'll bring it next to. Here we go. I'm bringing this over. Oh, you're not even going to hold him hostage. Wait a minute. You ain't cut me a piece of it yet. That thing's bigger in your head.

Oh, it's good. you got a head. Oh, it's fixing to not be. I just, hey, break me off a little piece of it, throw it over here. It's better it's toast to me. You got a toast sourdough. You got a toast sourdough.

It's really good toasted. Me and Guyana don't have to toast nothing. Don't you know that'd be good with some out of oil and pepper? Oh, yeah. Oh, that's the truth. Hey, bust me off a piece of it and chunk it over here. Well, hold on. I just zip it up.

You can bust off your own piece. Well, hey, she knows exactly what she's doing. Yeah, it's good. Oh, that's one of them. I got it. I got it. I got it. For lunch today, I had sourdough, butter, and bacon.

I saw that. And I was really selfishly hoping that's why you were a little late. I thought you may have made everybody a sandwich. Well, that's why I was late and then I got halfway here. Oh, well. Well, there goes your bread. I just wanted to. I got it back over here.

So this is yours, Godwin. I just wanted a little piece. This is like that joint with the throat rolls. Where is that? Lamberts? Yeah. That's what we got going on in here. big roll.

You don't want to chunk it. Uh-oh. Size. I don't, you can keep chunking it. It gets lighter. That Lombard's up there by Branson. That dude, there was a dude up there. This is to J.D.'s woman.

Across the whole room. So Allison passes the test on her brain. Oh, she's a breadmaker. I mean, I could look at John David and tell you she's good at breadmaking. Right. Oh, Pudgy-Board. Get out. All right.

Got up in that flanks. Got me. Allison, if you're watching, very good. Thank you very much. I can't talk with my mouth full. That's why I was late, by the way, because I got to work and realized I forgot it.

Then I went home for lunch and got halfway back and realized I forgot it. Again. All right, trumpet next time. Trumpet next time, people. You heard it here first. He's bringing the trumpet. Y'all need to buy me a black snake whip.

Why? That way, if you're going. I get the helmet what you're fine. You can reach me with that. It's right. It just gets me on his hand. Yeah, I'm not buying you a whip. Because I'm not sure you're going to be dialed in the first time you fire that thing this direction.

It's going to hurt. I don't want to be collateral damage to a whip. Oh, no. Hey, I can use one. I can use one, boy. Take it home, make a sandwich out of it. You better believe. Put some butter on it.

Oh, yeah. Hey, put some butter on it, make a ham sandwich and put it in the oven. No, no, forget the butter, forget the ham. Uh-oh. You get Ms. Kaye. Okay. To make her famous meatloaf. Oh.

And all you do is you take a sharp knife and cut that baby in half, put Ms. Kay's meatloaf on it, and then bring it to me. Bring it to you. That's right. Have you lost your mind? No. I'm saying, son. I have no words. You know what else she makes with them?

That sounds fantastic. That does. That does. I got nothing. Could you imagine shopping up some of that pizza sauce for that? That's wild. I just want to thank you.

Pizza sauce? Yeah. So that's what we do every Friday. She makes sourdough pizza crust. Oh, good. And we might do homemade pizzas like every Friday? Every what day? Every Friday or Saturday.

What time? It's a six or seven. That's right. Oh, it's awesome. Hey, one of the conversations. I might have to go see Stone one day. Uh. Stop on by.

I can't even talk because he got a mouth full of bread. He just keeps going back in on it. I know it. Me too. We got me a couple. We're going to have to take a break just for bread here. This might not make it all. My won't.

Can you mind the ham sandwich made out of that? Yes, I've had them. The only rule, Gobwin, is Allison doesn't allow mayonnaise to go on her bread. Oh, that's not. We like mayonnaise. Well, I'll put it between two pieces of ham, but it'll never. touch it. But they're going there.

Godwin said, I got a little trick for that. There's more than one way to skin a cat. Oh, that's funny. This was good. He said it to ever touch it. She, every night she's working on the

starter and all the stuff. She did that when her batteries went out on her scale, and she did that without a scale. She was worried. I was like, I was like, I tell her that I'm worried. Don't worry.

It was good. She just texted me. Man, she's got an art. She's an artist. She just texted me and said, do y'all have a knife? It tastes better toasting. All the things, hey. We got a toast.

You do their knife with that. I can't get out of it. Can't get out of it. Is that why they call it breaking bread with one another? That's how they used to have to do it. That's how they used to do it. We're commuting here. All we need is a little juice.

could use that for just put it on table and pay out wow i don't think you have to get that i'm so happy because i'm happy so if this disappears you'll be sad it's disappearing it's slowly disappearing there's a quarter there's a quarter less of it than when it got here i can say that for certain that's good with his coffee oh my goodness it's what i had for lunch i think you know what you can get goblin for christmas now i know cheap christmas Christmas present right there. Gobwin, sourdough, happy man. You make sure you can send us that picture tonight

when you get home and build that ham sandwich. Yeah. Because I know you're going to. I think I'm going to go to the deli and get some thick sliced ham. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. He's going to get some black bars, thick hands. Uh-oh.

And get some of that cut cheese. Uh-oh. That's thick. Yeah. Oh, goodness. I'm with you. Little mayonnaise in between. Yeah, forget the mayonnaise.

Put that, put the whole thing in the, the oven. Get some Dijon mustard. Ooh, now you're talking. Get some bag of odomiters. Oh, my goodness. And salt pepper.

And pickles. No, we're doing the pickles. Oh, no. You got to have pickles. Peckles? Yeah.

And even, hey, I'm off the pickles. A nice slice of purple onion. And then take you a purple onion. I forgot about that. How could I forget? I don't know.

And then take you a toothpick. And run it through a garlic stuffed olive. Oh. stick that right in the top of it. What are you going to do with that? That's just getting away. I'm going to tell you what you do with that. You grab that first and hot.

And like the French say, Mw. Get a big old head of lettuce so you have him big leaves put in there. Like the French say. I'm glad. You know what? Let's hurry up and talk. I got to get home.

I like, she makes lasagna sometimes with a loaf of that bread. and I just I said put this podcast on fast forward boy we got to get out of here I'm out she makes lasagna oh no she makes the lasagna

but then you cut the sourdough and you basically use that as a spoon so when you toast it do you put it in oven like put olive oil on it throw an oven on broil or something is that where we're up butter man butter but yeah you can use that air fryer oh I'm all the rain I like that

you get that spray butter it's not as many calories. You take you one in fish, flea knives. Hey, you take you one in fish filet knives. Yeah. We just start, start, hey,

slicing it real thin. I think I have the sharpest bread knife in America because I've never used it. We use ours all the time. You all the time. Y'all doesn't went through three of them. That's what she keeps throwing.

Uh-oh, he's going back in. Back in for it. Hey, he can't stay. Hey, that middle. Today's episode, brought to you by bread. Right. Sour-dough bread, boys. entered part is

Oh, you're just hulling it out. He goes, I'm making me a hole from a sandwich to go out. He's making him like a hot pocket there. He's going to go home roll him a roll of hamas.

Be ready to go. I did take the dough one time and made it like a, it was the pizza dough, which is a little different, I think, but I made a stromboli out of it, aka fancy hot pocket.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Stromboli, that stuff's good. Strambole. you talk about. Yeah. Yeah, it's everything a pizza is and a nice little.

What else could we do with it? We can do a lot with it. Oh, with that? Oh, the sky is the limit on that thing. Oh, yeah, it's unlimited for that thing. There's a reason Jesus called himself the bread of life. Didn't he?

Is that right? I am the bread of life. He said that. Sounds good to me. I think that's correct. Sounds good to me. Smoke bacon from down in Florida. Oh, smoked bacon too.

Not Florida. Alabama? Alabama? That billee's bacon? Oh, I had some of that. I'm out. Oh, is that the one out? Oh, it's good.

No, he means out like his gone. No, I ate it all. Yeah. You can get it and he doesn't slice it. So it comes in like, it comes in a one pound piece of bacon so you can cut it as thick as you want. Cut it. Good, great. Why would you cut?

Guy was all about that bacon steak. 16 ounce bacon ribide. I will say, you know. Yeah. Medium. That was one of the best days of my life. What's that? We were in Minnesota, in Minneapolis.

At a steakhouse. And one of the appetizers said bacon. That's all it said. And Willie called the waiter over and said, friend, what does this bacon entail? He goes, it's just three pieces of bacon. You're going to want to order it. And I was like, three pieces of bacon for $15. And they were an inch thick a piece.

It was like a steak. It tasted like bacon. and it was it was it'll go down in history as one of my finer marters and la la la land i'm just i'm pictured martin and la la land it's okay yeah i think we might have to hit that power button on that pit boss in you know you mix that bread with about half the things that come out of that moink box yeah you got you got you got you got you something yeah you got some that's why because i i could i mean i could eat the whole

She cooks about four of them when she cooks them and meatloafs. Oh, yeah. I need about four rolls of that, J.D. And that way I could eat all four. If I hold it's in a little bit, you could slide the one deal in there. That's right, the whole thing. And then just go ahead and oink out. Oink out.

Point out. Not even moinke out, oink out. Just oink out, boy. Well, look, let's oink out to a break so we can all wipe our face and get us up to drink. We'll be back right after this. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means?

That means more outside cooking. And y'all know we love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Triedells beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good? It's so good. Our friend, Sall Robertson, would say, buy on the grill. Look, before we got Triedales, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. and you never really know where that beef comes from,

but with Tritails beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Tritails comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch, so they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill.

Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need. Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Triedails beef. I know in size case, Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat. She isn't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah.

Just go to trybeef.com slash. That's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. Hey, I got a great idea. I got you. I got you, God. When you was talking about your ribs from 4th of July, being so tender to bones, pulled that up.

You can remove all the bones. That's right. And slide that rack of ribs up in between there. I'm going to do it. A rib sandwich. And McDonald's makes a fortune off of McRibs. But a Godwin's McRib. There you go.

There you go. Well, we couldn't call it Mac. We'd call it. Hey, why, Mike, don't it's. Let's call it Goddrib. Godwin's goodies. Godwin's goodies, boys. This segment brought to you by Godwin's goodies.

But you have to whisper it a little. Godwin's goodies. Because he didn't, he said, Godwin's goodies. Yeah, you whisper the goodies. Yeah, you whisper the goodies. Godwin's goodies. I like it. I smell a YouTube video.

Godwin's signature sandwich. Check us out at Duck Commander on YouTube. Ooh. We do need to just make a ridiculous sandwich on YouTube. We do. We've got the bread. I've now got the bread. That's right.

We've got the bread to start out with. That's not going to make it by the time. That's not going to make it until 4 p.m. I'll put in another order. No. That's out. Oh, that thing will be hollowed out. All you'll have is out.

That's probably won't even get a taste of that. Sorry, baby. I had the best loaf of bread today. What do you have for supper? I had a loaf. That's all right. It's garden time. Like you can put vegetables.

freshly baked. I'm going to turn the entrance around, so at least you've got to work for it. It's not so tempting. See how pretty that side is? You don't want to mess it up. Yeah, look how pretty that side is. There you go. I'm doing you a favor.

You're going to want more of this later. You don't want it all right now. Oh, yeah. Uh-oh. He's reading my computer. I was making sure that I wasn't. Jesus is called the bread of life. Why is Jesus called the bread of life?

He said, I'm the bread of life. Whoever comes to me shall not hunger. and who ever believes in me shall never thirst. I was just making sure I wasn't being. So what you're saying is bread is a good thing. Yeah. Bread is always a good thing. Jesus sure liked it.

Jesus was it. Look, here's what I'll say about Jesus. He compared himself to a few things. One bread. What else is he compared to? A dove. Do you know what's fantastic eating? A dove.

Everything that Jesus said, was are the finer things in life there's no doubt about that as far as table fare is concerned i'm gonna go i'm not so big on lamb lamb it's got a place it's got a place just not in my table yeah hey it's got a place but not in the food well i think lamb would be a lot better if people didn't surround it by weird spices like if you cooked lamb like deer like if you cooked it Like venison, it would be really good. 100%. I think that.

Stone did that, but I ain't no lamb, man. Yeah. He ain't a lamb, man. I mean, I'm eating lamb. Not for food. Yeah. Yeah, he's not at the top of my list, but, you know, he'll work.

What else? What else was it? Well, hey, that's like a goat. The goat ain't on my table fair either. Yeah. A goat ain't nothing but a deer. Oh, no. I begs it if you were there.

He begs to do it. Their difference is their diet. Well, hey. Did you make deer cheese? A goat. If you got the milk, if you went out there and milk her, you know. Can you milk a deer? I mean, I know you can.

She's got teets. You can milk her. Oh, yeah. Yeah, if you, uh. There's a movie about this. There's a movie about this. Call meet the parents. We'll get in trouble if I do the direct clove.

I know. But is that possible to train a deer to milk it? Yeah. Has anyone ever milked a deer? If you got it from a little baby, I guess, you know. I've, I've been shot by deer milk. when skinning said dear oh yeah

I have too did you drink it no no no I wiped it off quickly it's just kind of weird I don't know and an accident gets squeezed oh yeah

yeah or if she still had a little milk but her phone was gone or something and you got her and you went to skin her and you cut through there

get a face full of milk because people drink cow milk and goat milk and almond milk and soy milk no no no no no no no no no

we don't go on we don't go on I don't know I don't know how they got milk out of an almond That confuses the snot of it. It has to be not more than one. Good grief.

Well, no. It can be just one. Okay. It might be just one drop of milk from the almond, but it can be one. I'm talking about a smit. Hey, well, hey. He said it has to be more than one. I like this episode of food.

Like a cow, you milk a cow. You get a gallon of milk. Well, no, no, I know how they do it since he said, I don't know. I don't either get milk out of an almond. It's just like how you, how do you get cold? They said it on the table and I go. Nope. How do you get a diamond out of coal?

You put it under pressure, baby. Yeah. Okay. So can you in fact get blood out of a turner? That's it, boys. Hey, you can't do that. You can't do that. You can squeeze and get turnip juice, but hey.

No blood. No blood. No blood. Unless you put a finger in there at the time you did it. Then you could get blood out of it. You're going to lose a finger doing it, but hey, you can't get blood. The size solution to getting blood out of a turn of it. Put your finger out of chocolate.

Don't move your finger in and slice. You have it. You had another one of the world's mystery. That's right. Hey, boys, where there's a way. Okay. Almond milk ain't milk. Well, no.

Well, you mean it ain't milk. They just threw the word milk on it. Hey, everybody in the world has almond milk. Put it on cereal and everything. Yeah. Well, it's just, they basically just soak almonds in water and then blend it. And they're calling that milk. That's almond juice.

I think it's because the color resumed. Well, all milk is a cow juice. I prefer the cow juice when you get one of them rib eyes with a handle in it. I prefer my cow juice to be red. There's only one word you can say to that. Tush. Tush. Cow juice, baby.

Cow juice. Okay. It's nice to see the coffee is kicking in. Yeah. I didn't make it today. Somebody that made it where you can actually drink it made it. This man, this man, all milk is is cow juice. Well, it's true.

And it is true. It's not false. But I'm just saying, we don't call apple juice, apple milk. Yeah. So shouldn't almond? You good. And be correct. I guess so.

But it's clear. Apple cider. What's color got to do? Apple pie. Almond milk should just be called almond juice. Best and Biscay makes it. Oh, we got an apple pie here. Somebody dropped off this morning.

Who was it? The bank people, bank corp south. Our bankers dropped us off an apple pie. My wife makes a banging apple pie too. Does she make her own crust? Sourdough. Sourdough. I don't think that one's sourdough.

Look. But my wife got mad yesterday because she did the grocery pickup. She got home, and she goes, no almond milk? No. She said, they gave me the wrong flour. You must have been out in the sunlock, yowling. Why did you say that? Because you look like Santa Claus, you rose these red cheeks.

He's so happy about that bread. We're off track. You look good with rosy red cheeks. You ain't been wearing any sunglasses as much. He's on the side. He don't have it. Yeah, you don't have the white deal. I don't like to wear a sunglasses.

Okay. My hands smell like bacon. Do you like to wear sunscreen? Dady's hands smell like bacon. No, but my wife... Better smelling like taco meat. My wife was mad. I got questions about that, too.

No, we've already discussed that. Anyway, weird. She was mad about the bread flour versus the all-purpose flour, and I didn't know there was a difference. Well, I fixed eight. I was just fixing out of that. What's the difference between all-purpose and bread flour? Martin?

Are you kidding? I don't know. All purpose don't have. Look, here's what I'll tell you. I absolutely love to cook, and I cook a lot. I do not bake at all. None? None.

Not a baker. Not a baker. Not a baker. I like fire. Oh, you like, okay, okay. I'm a big believer in flames when you're cooking. Yeah, I'm the same way. I guess I got it when I was a child and the first bird.

I kill. Dad said you killed. He's got to grill it and eat it. So how goes that brown thrash? Oh yeah. No, no. Hey, look. And hey, that bad boy went on a fork.

I built me a fire and roasted it over there. And, hey, loved it. Yeah. Whether it's charged. Especially a brown thasher. Because, hey, he's in the quail family. He's white meat. Oh, yeah.

Oh, hey, we'd have a, we'd have a celebration when I killed a brown frasher. He's the first one to wake up in the morning and the last one to go to bed. Who? Me? Brown thresher. Brown thrash. Oh, he's pretty burning. When he's sitting on a dead.

And he is delicious. He's the first one you hear. I've ate them in him. Can you eat those? Oh yeah, can you eat it? You can. You can eat Robin? Red breast and Robin is real good.

Red Robin. You've eaten a Robin? What they call the crow blackbird? The big one? The grackle? Yeah. He's good eat. Yeah.

A crow? Well, he's a grackle. He's the big blackbird. He looks like a red wing blackbird. Yeah, not that. No, he's too little. He's too little. Brackle?

Common. The grackle. The grackle. Okay. He's a big, yeah. He's got a big long tail. Common or boat tail. You've eaten both of those things?

Yeah. Those are like in the parking lot at Walmart. Yeah. Oh yeah. They're eating French fries, son. They find. Yeah. They just like us.

They eat French fries just like we do. Hey. You eat those? Yeah. But we'll probably now, I think, let's stay away from the songbirds that we've eaten. Well, no, no. Oh, no. Oh, no.

No, no. And your day, that was survival. Oh, no. In my day. No, no. if it was a songbird, that wasn't survival. You got a beaten if you killed a songbird. Mockingbird.

Mockingbird. He was out. Cardinals and all them are out. Cardinals out. Worst weapon I ever got. A few times I had to repent because of that. Yeah, yeah. A few times I had to repent.

And then, you know, mainly, I finally learned, hey, you kill a cardinal or a mockingbird, you get your boy tore up. Okay. That helped me lay off of the songbirds. But anything else was fair game. Yeah, anything was fair game. But, hey, no songbirds. No son.

Morrow didn't like to kill them. You know, she'd like to hear him wake her up. Let's take our second break. We'll be back right over. We're at break number two already. Can we discuss something? I need to. Hey, get it off your chest, Jay.

I need to get it off my chest. Lay it out. We've praised my wife's cooking abilities this episode, but I've got to bring up something major. Oh, I think I don't go negative on you. We're going negative. Not on your woman. She cooked something the other night that was just no good.

Uh-oh. Because it was out of... Jay, D, do you know the world is hearing this? I know. And I need the world to hear this. Have you lost your mind? It was out of a different cookbook. I want to stop you right now.

I know it. I want to stop you. You can try and stop me. It needs to be said. I just don't know that... I'm being choked right now. You're digging your own grave. No, no, I'm making a firm stand.

Even if I'm in a hole, I'm planting a lagging. I want to hear it. Just because you decorated bathrooms and kitchens. and living rooms on HGTV doesn't mean you get to make a cookbook ma'am and I'm not going to use any names but that cookbook's just no good okay in other words

she tried a different cookbook and the food was terrible yeah so if you're making a cookbook I want you to look like yeah I want you to look like Miss Kay Miss Kay's cookbook I'm in on Pioneer woman I love that lady she can make a cookbook

wondering why they're cooks I'm tired of people just putting their name on a cookbook they're not even cooked You might know who I'm referencing. If you've ever been to Waco, Texas, but that doesn't mean you can cook. Hey, for all you not cooked out there, hey, don't put your name on a cookbook. That's the bottom line. Here's what I'm gathering.

Yes. You would rather somebody that looked like me and Gobwin. Amen. Make a cookbook versus sigh. Oh. What about a food? Yes. Yes.

We can pull common sense in this little discussion here. You don't never want to buy a skinny. man's cookbook. Well, and I'm not even saying that. They got to be skinny. The evidence is there. He can't cook. Well, there's one exception.

Uh-oh. One exception. Uh-oh. You was there. Who? And you was there. I wasn't there. That cooked down there in Florida.

Oh, young Nathan. But look, he was. Down there. Well, him too. Yeah. But down there in Florida when we went. Yeah, but see, they're cooking. But they're cooking other people's recipes.

Which is, that's a completely. They hadn't written a book. They hadn't written a book. I'm not even going with size. Okay. Yeah. But she cooked? Well, I know, but hey, look.

Well, Allison is kind. It's like the proof thing to. She's a great cook. That's just because it all comes down to can you follow instructions. And the person writing the instructions? Needs to know how to do it. But there's this new fad where if you're famous, you make a cookbook. Snoop Dogg has a cookbook.

Which is hilarious. It's funny. We have both. I bought it because it made me laugh. That don't mean I'm going to follow it. Now it's like, oh, look. But it's a good toilet. Even if you're on HGTV, I don't want your cookbook.

I only want people on the Food Network's cookbook. Yeah, Bobby Flea, send me one. I'm in, Mr. Bobby. Yeah. All them people, send me one. Yeah. That's the deal about how it. Not everybody, okay, can cook.

Cook all your life. Nobody calls your chef, right? Yeah. They put balsamic vinegar on Brussels. Al-sahomic vinegar are against the law. See? That's why I was upset.

Whoa, no, no, no, no, no, no. I knew I'd have you all there. Siah loves vinegar. No, no, look, I can drink vinegar straight out of the bottle. Si loves vinegar. I love it. Something happened in Vietnam. There's nothing better than, you know, vinegar on some kind of salad.

It's not even that. Like, I'll say my grandparents were the same way. Loved vinegar. Like, anything vinegar. Look, it's a preservative guy. Because they pickled everything. Okay. He got very offended.

So that's why you live so long. Well, hey, I'm just telling you, it's a preservative, okay? That's how he beat COVID. Hey, you put stuff like tomato, your pickles in it, and you can then eat them. Cucumber. You're talking about, like. Cucumber? Yeah, my grandparents.

It takes cucumber, no, okay, and then pickles it. Yeah. Okay. It takes oakry, oakry and pickles it. Oh, my goodness. Okay, and you can eat it later. D. Oh my goodness.

Now, hey, anyways. Don't mess with vinegar. Okay, it's a preservative, buddy. Yeah, I'm with you, though. I think they like it so much because they grew up eating it because refrigerators weren't in every house. Like, they had to preserve a lot of their food. And when you get used to that, vinegar is what it is, you know. Oh, no, no, no.

That's why, like, hey, you know, you got to understand. I grew up in the 50s, okay? Mm-hmm. But 1950s. Okay, but we lived like we was back in the 1850s. No refrigerator. When Mama said, hey, we need some bacon. Well, I guess what?

One of the kids went out to the smokehouse. I want to build a smokehouse. Hey, we just poured a big slab of smoke bacon, and then she cut it like he said, cut it thick as you want it, baby. I want a bell to smoke out. Oh, no, no, no. Yeah, I do. Yeah, but hey, yeah, that was one of them deals that, oh, yeah,

It was worth it. No, no, no. Everything is fresh. I know. That's why he wants to build one. Well, what do you? What? Y'all just built a fire in it.

We had a, it was like a. On the outside of it and a box. Yeah, underneath. Underneath. And it just smoked it all the time. Okay, it's like a, make a say it's a small barn. Okay.

And this was logs, okay, that my, my dad and my uncle put together. Okay. Yeah. And then you had a, took a 55-gallon drum, okay, cut it in half, put all your wood and stuff in there under it, okay, and it come up through the crack on the floor, okay. It's like a sauna. Yeah, you had to build it with a crack where the smoke could come up through the, and the whole thing. When you go in there, when you were actually smoking it, you know, you couldn't stand in there, stay in there long.

How many animals did y'all have? Oh, no, no, look. Would you put, when you hang the meat in it? let's say you butcher the hall hamps. Hang the hams. Okay. Just I was going to go that way, okay?

My dad and my Uncle Marvin, they went half on beef, pigs, chickens. Yeah. You know, I mean a bunch. They bought a bunch of them. Okay. And we raised them, okay, and then we slaughtered them.

And then we hung beef in there. We hung pigs in there. Yeah. Do you have salt and season it? Yeah. Yeah. And then just have it. You had chickens in there?

That's weird. How come it doesn't ruin? No, we raised chickens. For eggs? All eggs and when they was little, friars. Preserve it. Well, they would preserve it with salt. Yeah.

Yeah. You'd cover it with salt pretty heavy. Yeah. Yeah, because when we wanted ham, we just wanted ham, we just one and then grabbed us a big ham. And it's like country ham. Oh, yeah, country ham. And then mama would go and then slice off what we make sandwiches. Boy, that sounds good.

No, no. Oh, no. Hey, yeah. I was waiting on it. Gobwin was just staring. He was like, you just had ham hanging behind your house. You just had self-serve ham. Oh, yeah.

Buddy. You can get a beehive and hang it over the top of it and let that honey just drip down. Oh, no, no, look. See, hey, look, that's the way we grew up. Honey smoked. No, no. That's what I'm talking about. Hey, he's the Lord.

Derek, you brought that up. Look, we're sitting out on the porch, okay, in the summertime. Hot. Portia in the summertime. Here comes a black swarm of honeybees. No, no. Hey. Yeah.

This lady next door to us had that, I can't think it's a veranda that's got roots that flower. Yeah, verbena. Yeah. Okay, this thing is runs for, oh, hey, it runs your entire house link. Okay. So, hey, here comes this big swarm of bees. My dad's looking at him. Said, okay, whoa, hell out of it.

You know, we watched them. They went over and got on one environment. It's about to big around, yeah, that come down, okay, and it was opening. They all lit on each other, and it's a ball, okay, about this big around. Protecting the queen. On that route.

Mm-hmm. So my dad goes back there, we had a little old house that a lady lived in, he went back there, went around there into the pine knot, he took a hammer, pown, knock that pine knot in, okay, there's a hole in the wall down, okay? Went around there, he said, Come on, come on, boy.

And I'm going with him. And he walks up to this big ball of bees. Okay, and that, mm-hmm, you know. He said, grab that right there. I'm going to cut it. I said, do what? You want me to what? You what?

He said, grab that limb, boy, and hold it and don't shake it. Daddy, call Phil. I'm like this. He said, I mean right now. Yeah, I'm sitting there, yo. So he cuts it off, and I'm sitting there holding it. And, hey, we got bees, a ball of bees this big range of, so he cuts the other end off and look,

he had already set two chairs out in front of that pine-knit hole. We walked around there very carefully, okay? And he set it down. He had another chair, and he sits down like this right here. Okay, and he's watching these bees roll on top of each other, and then he goes, yeah. As soon as it, a bee hit in that hole, it was

and every one on one in that hole following the queen all following the queen and look from then on every time it was time to rob the beehive he took a skill saw cut him a door

okay and then nailed it back up so when he got ready to rob it all they did is pull the two nails poor man's bee box yeah gently lower this and turn it around and set it down because there is a big hunker honey on the back of this board.

Fresh honey, fresh ham. Look here. They was living, God. Okay. Then sit down there and, hey,

take that, cut it off in a three number three wash tub, flam to the top. Okay, with honeycomb and honey. And then mama would put up about 40 jars

of honey and honeycomb. Yeah. And pint jars. A piece of that, honey. Come and mong. Okay. Time for biscuit and bacon

and honey. for breakfast. Oh, that was living. Okay, trust me. Well, look, let's live right on end our next break. We'll be back right after this. Yeah, let's do world problems.

Let's see what kind of problem we'll get over there. All right. Keith again. Apparently, we've read something from Keith. This is the modern day, dear Abby. Okay, that's it. It's your favorite question asking redneck from Mississippi, Keith.

Oh. Big Keith. So here's the problem. They have a huge roadkill problem. They got possums, armadillos, coons, deers, beavers, and even the occasional alligator. I don't know why. I said that's so weird.

Their solution with people with shovels isn't effective enough. How would Uncle Si solve this problem? Oh, no, no. First of all, okay, you got this identified wrong. Done. Okay. My job is. A lot of roadkill and the animals, critters you named.

Okay, that's not a problem. Okay. Especially armadillas. Oh, no. Armadillas, coons, okay, beavers, okay, all of these are nuisances, okay? So you don't really have a problem, okay? But you're talking about, okay, is there a good way to clean this up? Yeah.

And he asked one more question. What would you do with all that sunbaked, smells delicious smelling meat once it's been removed from the road? I got a lot of questions about that, Keith. But how do we get it off the road? and what do we do with it? You let, hey, look, the Almighty put into effect when he created all this stuff. Okay, don't worry about it, okay.

He's done gave them, okay, there's flies, buzzards, okay, and critters that will eat all that off the highway quickly. Okay, buzzards got to eat. Okay, buzzards got to eat. Worms have got to eat, and hey, look, I said flies. The lava, magas. That's a maggot. That's a baby fly, okay, in the making.

Yeah. Okay, and look, the Almighty took care of all that, okay? Because trust me when I tell you, when that meat gets the smelling right, here comes the flies, and here comes the buzzers. They're coming. They're coming to it, okay? And, hey, it won't take them long to clean it up. There ain't nobody gang hoopnets around there.

Well, hey, now that's a good point. Gallen just brought up a good point since my brother done that for a living for 25 years. That kind of stuff you can put in hoopnets, and, hey, here comes the catfish, okay? I don't want to eat what he said. Well, no, no. Hey, they're scavengers, okay. Oh, you know that part away. Hey.

His head. Oh, no, you don't like to worry about it. They're going to take care of it. Yeah, you can throw that away. But that's my life. Hey, that's not a problem. In short, you're saying, no problem. Lion King had it right.

He found something else to worry about. Yeah. Yeah. There you go. Yeah. Keith, don't let that bother you. That's no sleep over room. The circle of life.

That's just nature taking his course. I mean, but I wouldn't want a bunch of road kill like on my road. Well, no, no, because, hey, look, what that's telling you is, okay, is that they're overpopulated. There's nobody hunting over. So it ain't nobody, you know, nobody. It's a good thing. It's a good thing.

He wouldn't leave it behind. All right, boy. All right, we got one more problem to solve. All right, what's that? From my man, Tyler in Georgia. It's a lot. Go ahead. He's trying to fix the Atlanta Falcons.

Boodoo! That's just a joke I do. Try getting the lead late instead of early. Oh, never mind. Tyler says we have a huge coyote problem in Georgia. So how would you solve this? What you do is you sick. I hope it involves Claymore.

Hey, what you do is now, you sick the hunters on them. Okay. Yeah. Mojo makes a little thine. Hey, you can put like a $5 to $25 bounty on them. Okay, and trust me, when I tell you, $5 a tail, okay, look, Georgia is full of rednecks. Hey, you give any redneck five dollars a tail for critters. Hey, just get ready because here comes a bunch of tails.

Hey, pay the money. Yeah, I agree. Do copy what Louisiana did with the Nutria program. Give them boys $5 a tail. And all of a sudden, the news. And all of a sudden, the nutria are manageable. Population, yeah, population went down big and quick. Yeah.

Yeah, we killed a bunch of nutrients. Yeah, still do to this day. South Louisiana, hey, that popped in the head and heartbeat. And they make a sauce becon out of it. Yeah, okay. And then they eat them. Boy, a nutrient. I like a sauce becon, not with a nutrient.

Oh, nutrient meat is clean. Yeah. No. Very clean. They're vegetarian. Vegetarian. They're vegetarians for crying out of hell. But I've seen them.

That doesn't matter. only like eating the pretty. Just because he's got a slick tail like a big rat. You like squirrel? You got to be honest with you. I'm really not that. Hey, no, no. Hey, that's my favorite.

Got wild game. I know you do. That's a tree rat. That's all that is, a tree rat. And he's good. Okay. But again, hey, what he eats, okay, is buds off a tree, the leaves when they bud out. Yeah.

Before they bud out. Acorns. Hickory nut. Hey, what he eats is clean and. Hey. And they love. Love mushrooms. Oh, no.

Love mushrooms. And they know the difference between the poison one and the good ones, boys. They never know when they're shot. Yeah. Oh, no, that's my fate while game. Squirrel. I could eat a dozen of them. They'd make a fine graver.

Oh, what are you talking about? All right. Well, let's take a quick break. We'll be back right after this. We got life advice after this. All right. You said we're going deep. We're going to go deep, but real quick.

My man, Wesley, he sent in pictures from his grandma's yearbook. and she must come in and hey grandma must have been a rebel look at sire robertson yeah number 10 yeah number 10 for the north cattoe something or another's north catto rebels what were you the end of huh i was i played you were a tiny little i played two position in and quarterback i'm going to send that to the people so they can put it on youtube i hope and on defense i was a monster man you're what we've already talked about oh yeah no monster man boys i was a i'm sending that picture to the people i was like uh What's the guy that everybody hated?

They said he was the nicest guy until he put on the uniform. Wow, that's weird. Diska? Huh? Mike Ditka? Yeah. Diska.

Anyway. Or was it? No, no, I think that is Mike. Buckkus? Buckus. Buckus. Yeah, they said, hey, this is a nice guy there. But until, until he puts on a uniform

and then he turns into an animal and will kill you. Wow. And there's even a little picture of a sigh with a smirk on his face. Oh, hey. With a t-o-on-my-face. He's always got a slurper. Wesley,

thanks for the pictures. Yeah, that's the rebels. Go, Red. North Caddo Red. Black and red. Black and red. Matter of fact,

I got a, I got a, I got a, I had a bottle of black shoe bottles in my, in my pocket. Phil slammed the door on me and busted it.

It cut my leg. I'm a true rebel. I believe black and red, boys. Oh, boy. North Caddo Rebell. Hey, North Carolina, rebel, boys.

He's back in it. He's true, boy. He's true to it. All right. Black and red. And we got three advice questions, but two of them were going to hit hard. We're hit hard. Because we got an engaged couple and a retired couple.

So we're going to hit all. We got both spectrums here. We got both spectrums. So my man, Justin, from Muncie, Indiana. Is that where the Munster's live? I don't know. He's a career firefighter in the EMT. Thank you for your service.

Thank you, sir. Thank you, Justin. And after multiple 24 hours shifts in a week, and he sees some things being an empty, EMT, for sure. He likes to get away and fish and camp and do those things with the boys. His question is, how does he tell his fiance that I love her more than anything, but sometimes I just need to do things with the guys to help unwind from the stressful work week without her wanting to join and without hurting her feelings. It's not that I don't want to spend time with her.

It's just a different type of relaxation. I got to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back. He'll be right back. It's a good question. It is a good question. And if she listens, now she knows. That's how you ask.

Justin, I'm just going to say, presentation will be key in this. Your presentation will be everything in this. And your choice of wording. Yeah. Okay. Hopefully she's listening. Yeah.

But anyway, darn. Darling, you got to understand something, okay. Yo, I love my red-headed wife, the mean little heifer. Okay, dearly. Okay, but look, me and her talk about this, okay. You know, his call, he needs his man time with the boys. Just like, hey, you probably want to go out with the girls, okay, and enjoy being with the girls. So you make time, you make time, okay.

Look, here's the thing. you fell in love with this guy okay he was hunting and fishing and doing all this before you met him do not try to change him darling you learn to live with it okay let him do the hunting and fishing and then you go

and what bake pies or whatever you want to do with your friends the girls okay that way you both he grew up in 1850s he's time off he needs to it's kind of like Paula told me after the fact and I said this before she she thought I was hunting fishing because I was trying to get away from her which you know a lot of

people didn't want to be around her which a lot of people do but yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah that's that's sad but you just need to communicate and just talk to each other and let each other know how you feel and you know respect each other's time yeah there's going to be times when you need your time and um but it's not because neither one of you loves the other one less you just got to communicate communication is the key martin has a saying he uses in the office a lot open communication and honest community. You've got to have it.

It works in everything in life. Yep. With honesty and capital letters. Yeah. I would say much along the same lines is your fiance needs to be plugged in

with a good group of girls, just like you're plugged in with a good group of guys. I think you can go to the book of Proverbs and there's times in there where it's basically talking about men everything need to be with men yeah because it does strengthen you being with other men just like being with other women is going to help strengthen her like godwin said i don't go hunting and fishing

to get away from brittany and most of the time i take her with me i mean yeah she's every now and then i look at her and she's like where you going i'm going fishing and she knows if i didn't invite her then i need my time and my time a lot of times is actually a a long time like with nobody so um and she respects that and she knows that whenever if i didn't say hey do you want to go and i just say hey i'm going fishing she knows that there's something in me that needs to go be alone for a little minute to process some things or whatever that life has to throw at you um you know so just just be open and honest from the start don't try to hide it don't try to be clever and get around it but also come off in a way that is extremely loving

and respectful of your future spouse because like that's why I said presentation is key in this regard well now and back on it I'll say it one more time okay don't try to change okay you fell in love with him he was doing it when you fell in love with him and for heaven's Pete don't be that guy it says you need girls time and then when they go out with their girls you're texting and calling asking when you're going to be home and doing all this doing the same thing let her have her time better have her time she'll be home she's coming home ain't no big deal Because all that stuff works both ways. I've seen all sides of that stuff.

Thank goodness, praise the Lord. I haven't had to deal with either side of that. I got me a good one that understands. Yep. All right. Next question. We're going to go kind of the opposite. Patricia, we don't know where she's from,

labeled this retirement advice. I'm just going to read it word for word. Do it. Help, exclamation point. My husband and I are very much in love, but we're driving each other crazy. Exclamation point again. How do we spend the days and still love each other?

Oh, they're both retired. They're both retired. They're at home. No, no, no. It's 2020 all over again at Patricia's house. Here's the thing. Both of you, excuse me.

Both of you need to find a hobby. Hobbies are important. Okay. You need something that, hey, you go do by yourself, and your hubby goes and do something by himself, okay? Yeah. That way when you're together,

you won't be at each other's stroke. Patricia, can I make a suggestion by your husband a boat? Oh, hey, I like that. You're welcome. And not only that, that may be something you can do together, and it's really fun. And it gets you out of the house, it gets you out of the confines of them four walls,

buy a boat, grow a garden, find something that takes up you free time, other than just sitting there looking at each other, then because when you do that, you do start to get on each other's nerves. Bake bread. And the big D is looming near. Okay, because you can't get alone.

I don't know if she's from Dallas or not. I don't know what she's talking about. I'm going to know how long they've been retired together. That's a good question. When I first come to work for Duck Commander after I was doing all that shift work, and then I was home every night with Miss Paul. I thought we was fixing.

and I had to get some marriage counseling or something. And it was a little different. But we would do stuff. We would entertain people. They'd come over to the house, and we'd play games and cook out. And then, you know, we just worked our way through it. Well, no, that's a good point.

Find like-minded people. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Hang out. And hang out. people at our house. My wife will invite someone over every night of the week if it was up to her. I'm like, I need a little, but that's a good one. Entertain.

Cook dinner for people. And then our last email on the day, my man Juan Carlos. I think his name's like Juan Carlos, like mine's John David. It's like a double name. We'll call him J.C. J.C. asks, there's this girl that I like, and I need y'all's best advice to start talking to her. Help. Hello.

Here's my advice. You need to walk straight up to her, look her in the eyes and say, hi, my name's Juan Carlos. Would you like to go eat dinner sometime? I'll pick you up at seven. There it is. Or you can go up and tell her, hey, you good-looking thing, thank you. Hey, I ain't no way I'm going to be able to live without you.

Would you like to go have dinner with me? I like that too. And if dinner is too intimidating, if dinner's too intimidating, start coffee. Ice cream. Ice cream. I'm an ice cream man. Ice cream. The most important thing you can do is just do it.

You just walk up, open and honest, and say, hey, I think we'd have fun together. Let's go hang out sometime. I would just be in you. I do not know any woman that would not like hearing. Hey, you good looking thing, you. I want to take you out. Johnny Deet. I'm going to say that tonight.

Tell him your line from college. No. Oh, come on, J.D. It worked every time. Ask sigh. Ask sigh. Act like size of a girl and you're going to pick him up. People are going to judge me.

No, this is fantastic. JD. So I would. All right, Juan, here's the line. No, I'm going to tell Juan the line. I'm going to tell Juan the line. It worked on my wife, Juan. You walked straight up to her and say, hey, I don't know her name.

You want to go get a pizza and make out? And when she looks at you funny, you got to be quick, though. You say, what? You don't like pizza? There you go. Icebreaker. Everybody laughs. Look, everybody laughs.

And next thing you know, you're eating pizza, and then there's only one thing left to do it. See? See, I don't answer that just definitely. I said, you got a problem with making it out there, darling? No, no. You ask them why they don't like pizza. They laugh.

You like in the mood. Everything's true. And then you're like, I'll pick you up at seven. And next thing you know, you're at Johnny's pizza. And next thing you know, you're married and you got 10 kids. There you go. And living happily ever after. I mean, that the world needs.

You didn't know that. That's a good one. You want to go get a pizza and make out works. It works every time. You at least get pizza, and that's a good thing. Stay away from Imagine Dragons. I like it because, boy, hey, I get the laugh. It's something funny, okay?

Which is a good thing. Oh, boy. Who wants a Bible verse? Yeah, let's end this thing. Let's end this thing. Oh, give us one about freedom, J.D. Oh, I already have one about Bread of Life. Well, give me that one then.

You like that one? Yeah, that would be all right. I like freedom and I like bread. we'll give us one for each Let's go with John chapter 6 We're going to read a little bit here So they asked him This is verse 30

What sign will we What sign then will you give That we may see it and believe you What will you do? Our ancestors ate the manna in the wilderness As it is written He gave them bread from heaven to eat Jesus said to them

Very truly I tell you It is not Moses who has given you The bread from heaven But it is my father Who gives you the true bread from heaven for the bread of God is the bread that comes down from heaven and gives life to the world. Sir, they said, always give us this bread. Then Jesus declared, I am the bread of life.

Whoever comes to me will never grow hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty. And I think that's a good place to wrap it up. The bread of life is Jesus Christ. Ladies and gentlemen, that is the duck call room. Amen. Man, Godwin. Get back on that bread.

Get on that tired dog, Gailman. We'll see y'all next time. Right here in the duck call. Right here in the duck car room. Kids, don't use that line.