Duck Call Room - Uncle Si’s Got a Crazy Plan for His Own Ashes

Episode Date: September 9, 2025

Martin comes up with a wild idea for Si’s ashes someday, and Si calls it the coolest thing he’s ever heard. Jacob lobbies for a life-size wax figure of Si, though the price tag is a little steep. John-David highlights the hilariously random beef Si has with Shaquille O’Neal, and the boys cap it off by dreaming of a Robertson takeover on “Family Feud”—all while admitting they’re not exactly the sharpest tools in anyone’s shed. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oh, hi. Y'all started something with that scrap. You started it. Yeah, you're the one getting out of your Springfield. I just walked in. You're the one getting your T-3 duck. I just, why did everybody keep you in glasses? Those have been fixed.

I think the AI only knows size. His glasses, oh, and that's another thing. They had a big deal on that the other day in the, in the news. Well, in that case, welcome back to the duck call room. They had a big deal in the news. What? They had a big deal on AI.

On PBS? No, it wasn't on PBS. I was just flipping through the channels. On Nickelodeon? Here was. It was there. AI. Aia.

And AI is, they're using it for therapy. Therapy. Yeah. Therapy. Instead, well, all I'm watching. Kids, kids are using it, okay. You know, here's how, oh. Bad the human race is gone.

That kids would rather trust a computer than mom and dad. To be fair, that Alabama receiver has a therapy pet horse. You didn't see that? He has an emotional support horse, but it's just a doll. Oh, it's a dog. Yeah, and he paints his fingernails. I'm a fish to the age where kids are ruining football. Here's my support.

Well, yeah, you got. I feel frog. Froggerson. Froggerson. That's my. I support. The world's wild. Always, you know, I ask him the real important questions.

I don't listen to humans. That's, well, that's clear. Humans are on my hit list. Or when you watch something on AI. Especially second grade. That's what I. Yeah, y'all have no idea what we've been talking about, but it's been a wild morning already. Yeah.

So, but how we're rolling. Good morning. Good morning. That's right. Wake up. A long time. listener first time caller. No, I used to watch stuff like

Daffy Duck. Daffy Duk. If you had to pick, Daffy, Adonnell. Good clean something about that God created, okay, before human beings got involved with it and then just screwed it all.

I'm a Daffy kind of guy. Are you a Daffy or Donald? Oh, rugby Daffy. I've never killed a true blue black duck. Give me Daffy. Them white ones are a dime or dozen. Well, we got to be killing Daffy. Our Bugs Bunny.

Daffy or not. hard to kill. Go with Bugs Bunny. Bugs Bunny? Why bugs? Well, he just, y'all. Also hard to kill. He was a rabbit.

Rabbit so nice. Jacob, are you old enough to have watched the Looney Tons? I did. I guarantee you he sells her shirts. What's that? He's got a Toby Key show. If anybody's headed to six flags,

they're going to stop by Jacob. That's a good man there. I was a good man. Oh, yeah. What's your little red, bearded little guy with the guy? Yosemite. Sam. Yeah, there you went.

That's who used to be on the mudflats? like all the big trucks. I always like those. I like that. And then what's the little dude that like to hunt? I'm hunting wabbits. Elmer.

Elmer foot. Elmer wouldn't know what to do these dudes. Elmer wouldn't know what to do with the fact that you could get your duck stamp online at duck snap. That's right. He wouldn't know what to go with digital. That wouldn't be good.

I mean, could you imagine if Elmer could just pull out a smartphone and get his duck stamp and then shoot Daffy 17 times and not kill him? I don't think he was hunting legal anyway, but you should. I don't think he's,

He probably had his stamp or his license. Probably not. He never even knew what season it was. But the good news is if you need one these days, it's super easy to get at duckstamp.com, duck season right around the corner. So whether you're hunting Daffy, blue wing, teal, Donald Mallards,

it doesn't matter. Blue wings. You already said. It's always about the quacks, boys. It's always about the quacks. We're after the quacks. But there's a lot more quacks than they used to be. We know that.

New one born every day. He's shaking his head, boys. What's he got? No, I didn't say. He said, he was more than he used to be. Yeah, that's what I said. New one made every day, too. Mike remember nicknamed Jall the Quack Attics.

The Quack Attics? Well, R&T Duck Call used to have a promo called the Quackheads. Yeah. Well, they make a duck call called Quackhead. Aren't we the Duckaholics Anonymous? Duckaholics Anonymous is what this is what. Or DA. Our fan club.

I guess that's what you call. I don't really know what that would be. What was it? You got to sign a little limited edition duck call. Yeah, it was in like 10% off the website or something. There you go. We used to, remember when we tried to name our fans? Yeah, what did we ever land on?

It was like episode one. The Uncle Si, something or another. Uncle Sy, sidekicks. Side, is that what it was? Yeah. So did you remember episode one of this podcast? No. We really didn't know what we were doing.

Now we definitely do. Now we still don't know. We thought we had an idea then. We have never known. What episode is? Hey, that's the fun of it. Yeah, it is the fun of it. I think this one is 4-81.

Wow. Who would have ever thought it? Have we introduced Jacob is now a recurring member of the duck call room? Have we officially made that official? Last time Jacob was on. Yeah. He's the official translator. Yeah, you weren't here, but he translated Sai, and Sai said, you have a seat anytime you want.

And I don't think Sai even knew that that was just a thing now. Yeah, well, that's an official thing now, which is why I didn't take time to introduce Jake normally when he's been on here. So we got a guess. But no, Jacob's just one of us now. We actually need to go deep dive into Jacob's psyche today to find out if he truly fits in. Well, now we get to, you know, we've always kind of took it easy on him because he's a guest, right? But now that you're in, all the gloves are off big day. What's your opinion on Captain D's?

It's time for once for a point. Oh. What did you say? What did he just say? Something came in a mail today. That's what he said. Oh, geez. Something came in the mail.

I get it. Anyway, Jacob, you did have somebody like real captain. Oh, no. No, no. You don't have. We don't have time for silingual today. We're going back to 2014. But something did come in the mail.

Got him! Somebody did email in after that last episode. Guy named Brett said, Jacob Mayo is my new favorite guest. That was the subject line. And then the entire email is, that is all. That is all.

That's the whole email. Well, now he's no longer a guest. Hey, the man recognizes his talent. Short and quick to the point. Hey, hey, there you go. Those are the emails I actually read. If you could put it in the subcommittee, subject line.

No, well, some people put... I mean, if it's short. Some people put a whole book in the subject line, and I'm like, you know, that's tough. It's the wrong publisher, you know? Yep. Because your boy is not even that good at reading regular. But what's the deal on Captain D's for real? Like...

You don't like it? I don't, like, personally ether, no. It's just the thing that we all really enjoy. It's a great little secret. Like, as a kid, I didn't want to go there. Like, my brother and sister liked it, but I didn't. I knew I liked your brother more than that. Well, they made you go to the captain.

Look, there's one person I know that likes Captain D's... or two people. No, everyone in this room. Me? Two mama, two papa, and Ryan Howard.

So that's the box. All right, I no longer enjoy catfrey's, everybody. Go to Catfish, Charlie's. You're not going to

change Philip McMillan opinion. No, I love California. What else are we big into? Little Debbie. Uh-oh. Jacob does a clean eater.

Yeah. He lives a healthy lifestyle of pickleball and normal foods. Yeah. I like some little debby's. You know what I really liked growing up? zebra cakes

zebra cake you know they made them better and made them look like a Christmas tree really have you ever had a Christmas tree cake yeah I have I didn't know that was associated though this podcast is going to change your life if you have well a little Debbie only makes about three things

she just decorated it all different they make the oatmeal cream pies praise God the other thing little black thing with the swirlies on the top fudge trout fudge round no no not those it's a it's like a cupcake but it's covered chocolate

Oh, no, that's that's hostess. Oh, man. What is that? What is that? Ding dong? Ding don't. That's what they sold when you got by the paper mill. Yeah.

That's a, that's a, that's a Balkanville snow. Oh, Balkanville. Hey, I got a question, and if we're going on this. Do you all like moon pies? Who doesn't like a moon pies? Oh, wait. Who does not like moon pies? Oh, my gosh.

So when I was in summer school in, like, first grade. And you had to, hey, you could just have a moon pie. RC Cola. You had to have an RC Cola with it. Okay, well, you want to know a diabolical combo that they gave you at summer school when you're in first grade. It was like Capri Sun and a moon pie, a banana moon pie. Oh, wait a hell. That's a good, that's a good moon pie.

You're about drinking that with like a strawberry, kiwi, capri sun. That's the craziest combo you could ever give a first grader. I'm interested in trying it, but I'm more interested in the fact that you had to go to summer school in the first school. Dude, I had issues. What do you mean? What was wrong? Addition? No, I had like...

Vowels. No, it wasn't that. I just didn't want to sit in my desk. That tracks. So I got a lot of spankans and stuff. Oh, you just, they said you're running summer school? Pretty much. No, he was hyper.

I can't imagine why you didn't want to sit in your desk. I could be a Capri Sun and a freaking moon pie. Yeah. I'm saying. Manana moon pie. Hey, the moon pie's all right. The Capri, that thing is trash. What? That thing is...

That thing is... awful. Caprice, that's like a diet Coke. Oh, man. You, Capri. Yeah, but I guess summer school is a good thing. He's got a little old straw that, you know, the size of a, you know. You got to stab it to make your hole in there. Well, no. You can't.

You can't. Nice stab yourself. Oh, his eyes weren't good enough. No, he was poking holes all over the place. It didn't have anything to do with my eyes. All right. Look, springtime is here. It's warming up.

You know what that means. That means more outside cooking. And y'all know we love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Triedells beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good? It's so good. Our friend, Cy Robertson would say, buy on the grill! Look, before we got Triedells, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day.

And you never really know where that beef comes to them. But with Triedale's beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way. Tritails comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch, so they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need.

Look, because I'll tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out TryTales beef. I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a she doesn't eat meat. She isn't a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash.

That's tribeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. Why were you drinking Capri's son, by the way? What were you doing in the 90s drinking Capri's sons in the military? Hey, some kid walked by and. I said, hey, I had one of these. And I took a swallow of it and he saw it. He did a swallor. He had one Capri's son in his life and he remembered.

Oh, no, hey, and it was trash. Yeah. I just had the wrong look. I think I was the kid. I didn't really like Caprice. I didn't need it. Hey, it was garbage. Yeah.

It's just delicious Kool-Aid in a pouch. Wait, wait, what's the Kool-A jammers? You couldn't get nothing up to it. No. What was the Kool-Lay jammers? Yeah, the little plastic ball. Hey, don't believe it. Don't buy me.

Don't not Kool-Lade. They were good. Hey, Kool-Aid's good stuff. No, I got the terrible one. You settle down there, Jim Jones. Hey, hey, yeah, don't be jumping on Kool-Aid. What, hey. The Saints have a cornerback in his name is Kool-Aid, and I love it.

Kool-Aid McInstery. Anyways, what were those little barrels? Cule-A, go give you a blast, Kul-A. Was it called a jug? I think there's a little bit called jug. Those were trash. Those were trash. It was like they almost put sugar in it, but they forgot.

And you take one gulp, you drink the whole thing, how big the hole was. He gone. You ever have those? What are you talking about? The little jugs are like, pull up the jugs. Like, they had pink. Yeah, they were, they were like the fruit stripe of the, of the, uh, Oh, that looks.

Little hug, the little hug. What came? Yeah, you never had those? Oh, no, no, what came in my mind was the little coats. Little, okay. And it was made, uh, little old bitty's like Kool-A drinks for three-tube. It was made out of wax. So you just bit the, bit the bottle off and drinks it.

I remember. those those were for older people i found one of my grandparents'bous basement that had been since he was a child it was not good you could actually drink the drink and then choose the wax really yeah that's cool wax so it was okay and it was actually good you just do the whole thing you mouth then when you busted it yeah hey that's interesting it was disgusting you're knocking on caprice sons and you're fired up about these things they're so nasty what you mean so that no they ain't that's A two and one.

You're eating a wax bottle. Hey, that's like a point. That might be the, hey, that might be the problem there. That's supposed to be like chewing gum because you could also like bite into it. Why do you know about these? I watched a documentary on them. A documentary. Yeah.

See, that's how cool they were. What? They had a documentary on a documentary. He watched a documentary on. Oh, Fun, Express, wax bottle candy drinks? And why do they have the name, the term nip in them? Nip L nip wax. Nick L nip wax.

Well, what did that come from from old women taking a nipple of a phone? Yeah, what? Taking a nipple of what? No, no, no, no. That's what that comes from. No, no, no. A nip of what?

Hey, white lightning. What is white lightning? Moonshan? Old sweet women that you used to watch walk down the sidewalk. Yeah. They was always sneaking a nip of white lightning. Really?

That's what they called like a little shot. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I'm not going to line this. I knew that, but I don't think a bunch of the old sweet women. I've learned a lot today. Hey, no, no, hey. Look.

I think you need to have a vintage candy store in your shop. Like, you go back to the vintage candies. Like, you can go in there and get all the, you can have. Do you want instant diabetes here? Take this. Hey, you want that. Take this. You can have happy hour on nickel nips.

Yeah, that's it. A little white lightning. Are they called nickel nips because they're a nickel? I don't know, man. They disturb me. Oh, yeah. How bored do you have to be to watch that documentary? How much time is on your hands and how far away is your girlfriend to have to watch that?

You realize you pirate Netflix. You have a dopamine efficiency. You don't have to get your money's worth out of it. I wasn't bored when I watched it. It was kind of cool. Yeah. What, like, what are we talking about? Hunter, my new.

Hunter knew about that white lightning. He's just trying to feel something. I'm just trying to figure out. What about your Netflix algorithm pops up a documentary on nickel nips? I don't even remember where I watched it. I don't know if you to ask me a true or false question if that documentary was a real thing. I'd have put a million dollars on false. Oh, they'll make a documentary.

Hold on anything. Did you eat the bottle? That's what I'm saying. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Ladies and gentlemen, according to the AI overview of Google, no, you should not swallow the wax on wax bottle candies. Oh, no, yeah. The wax is indigestible and not a food item. That's what I'm saying.

No, no, no, no. That just means it comes out. Hey. This man's digest. That means you, it's a modern marvel. That means you've bottled your crap. You're the junkyard dog now.

No, no, hey, y'all. He's eating Vicks vapor rub. Y'all, hey, he just used to eat it. Hey, you're a creature. I ain't a lot to you. You look like Jack eat them. Oh. That bad eye, man.

Vaporubbillabreub. Mixed with a nipple neckledic wax. And look, Vicks vaporoy is good for hemorrhoids. I might need them, but I mean, I'm going to eat them. Hey. Hey, the doctors have finally backed me up on that. Yeah.

And other things are backing you up with all the wax inside your small intestine. So that's what, no, no, no. Wait, hey, y'all last like y'all never went up to a sweet gum tree and took a piquet knife and carved a little hole in that bark of that tree. and then come back here two days later and get you some gum they sell big red at every gas station they sell what gum

like yeah but tell they it's any old gum like for a dollar you just went on a two day journey you got to pay money for that I can go out for the pocket life on a sweet gum tree and cut it come back two days later to get me a shoe we know your poker game money ain't a problem no well I know but that's besides what

Y'all don't understand. Hey, you got to know about things that you can get from nature. That is true. That's where we get all our medicine from. That's where Vick's vaporub comes from. That's, yeah. Go cut a hole in a tree, take a swallow. No more hemorrhoid.

It's your swallers, huh? I would not, I would say that's false. What? What he said? That Vick's vaporovs come from a tree. You just said all our medicine comes from nature? Well, I'm sure menthol was, I mean, it's essentially menthol. Y'all get on me about chewing the chewed the wax.

They're chewing tobacco. I can't take you to a wax museum, that's for sure. You might start taking bites out of them. Hey, look over here. He done took a bite out of Taylor Swift. It's up on site. You go to the JFK spot. He's already took a bite out of the shoulder, boys.

Send him by Vander Holyfield, that other ear gone. Oh, Mike left him. We're going to put up something. It'll be sigh biting Mike Tyson's ear off in the wax museum. Hey, I have been a horse on this. I told you all about that. Yeah, you told me. Yeah, that was a bad call.

No, I wasn't a bad call. What do you mean? What happened? You gotta show them who's balls. Oh, you weren't here for that. Show them whose balls. Yeah. Let that horse kick you.

No, no. I, it even gets worse. When my kids were kids, they was in the biting stage. Uh-oh. And you bite them back? Oh, yeah. Yeah.

I don't think that's a bad move. Hey, did it. But hey, here's the thing. They shot biting. Hey, it broke them of that. Hey, if you're going to get bit by side, you better make it happen in the next three months. months because in December that's going to hurt a lot worse.

That's right. I'm going to have new choppers. Yeah. There ain't going to be no gaps in it. It ain't no gaps in, it's weird that size not at any wax museums anywhere. Yeah, we should, hey, we should. Most wax people, though, I mean, aren't most wax museums?

Aren't they gone? I've never been to one because they creep me out. But I went to the one in Pigeon Forge on the internet because I figured that's definitely where Syes at. Hey, look at him choppers. It's either pigeon forge or like hot springs or Branson. Or Branson. Yeah, those are the third.

where you would have Uncle Si, and he's not there. Yeah. Yeah. No, I've seen. Ladies and gentlemen, if you work at any of those three wax museums, which is probably the last four, three of the last four on earth, please put Sai in. Yeah.

Give me a call. Hey, look up how much it costs to make a wax person. Are we about to make a wax, Cy? Yeah, you know, cool. Are we about to start a GoFundMe to make a wax? I was thinking of that. Yeah. Can we take up a donation?

Can we do one with the grill that we just showed of the AI character of Sy? A grill. a wax character. He's got tears in his eyes and he can't talk. You know how funny it would be with a wax character with Sye having a drill. Look, sigh always wanted to be taxidermied when he's gone. Hey. I mean, we can do a little. Holy moly.

How much is it? No, no, I'm laughing it because my wife. Well, my wife told me this morning. Oh, uh-uh. Hey, she told me how you need to take, get ready to take me to the doctor's office. I got an appointment. And she says, I forgot to call Liz to tell you. I thought about it, but then I didn't.

call it. So now it's, it's time for my apartment. You got to run my town. But before she's done that, she said, you know what I finally figured out what I'm going to do with you. And I swear to you tell her.

She said, wouldn't you die? If you die first. This is a common conversation? Yeah. Well, I, oh, people. When you reach that age, you do. Oh, you'll understand when you get her age. Yeah.

Old people always have a little silly conversation. But she said, I'm going to have you cremated. Uh-oh. Then I'll have a little, I'm going to have a little, I'm going to have a little heart container with a chain on it and I'm going to put you in that heart container and I'm going to have you up around my neck coast to my heart all the way. That's sweet. That is sweet.

That's what I'm going to do for it. And since you did that event at a crematorium, it'll probably be free. Yeah, but hey, I didn't, hey, they told me I thought we was going to get ice cream. Well, we come up with some weird subjects. Yeah, we do. If we did get a wax, a good one. of size, life size. And then cremated it, that would be $150,000 to $300,000 just gone.

What do you mean cremated? Never mind. Guys, if we can raise 150 Gs, let's do something better than that. Yeah, yeah. But what do you mean cremated? Just if we melted the wax. Like after it was done? Yeah, I was just saying, like, that's how much money we'd lose.

Why would you make me into whack and then melt it? Then burn it. I mean, it wouldn't make any sense because it would cost $100. I don't know, but if you come with a wick and you became a candle, that'd be kind of cool. Ooh, if we could, yes, what kind of, Hey, we give them to smell that. We get you that smell of that Italian pizza you have when you're younger. And put it on a candlestick.

Don't keep it on a little. What would a Cy Robertson candles smell like? Gunpowder. That's what it needs to smell like. Gunpowder and sage, minthal. I think it'd be a couple mixed flavors. Gunpowder, sage, and menthol. When you got to his back, it'd be all menthol.

From the years of Vicks vapor rub. That's what I was going to say. That's the grossest. Hey, Vic's vapor rub is a cure-all for a lot of stuff. No, it's not. Hey, you know what I'm saying? It really is.

I'll tell you this. If you eat Vicks Vapers rub, you're indestructible. I do have a question, though. Back to this deal. If Chris Dave really gets you cremated, can I get on the list for some of your ashes? What?

I want to put it. Why are you laughing? I want to put it in a dump right up there. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no. I want to load some shotgun shells with size. and see if you can kill them with blanks well and that way if I go

well you use the ashes as a buffer instead of like using black seed and stuff for your buffer and your shotguns shit you can use ashes and there's a lot of stuff that was said about gunpower yeah I just think it would be fun

to kill a duck with sigh I would just rather like in a couple months go with him well I'm gonna go with he's not dead yet I'm not saying hey I don't have me all some skills and let me do it right now. Like, yeah, obviously.

I will say, Facebook has killed you again, I'm pretty sure. I've had three people come in the store this week and go, how's Uncle Si doing? I said, well, he slapped me really hard yesterday, so I think he's all right. I'm just saying. People talk about AI. Unless Christine's going to wear those bongo drums around her neck, there's going to be more of him than what's in that locket.

That's all I'm saying. I would like to have a little of him for this room. Well, we can do that. Can I have one pair of socks? No, I'm getting the socks, bro. Oh, his sock collection? Oh, no, you're going to sell it. He's talking about eBay?

Quit, man. I want athletes foot for my uncle's foot. What do you mean? Oh, have you seen them feet? They're clean, son. They're clean, man. No, I've got pretty feet. Yeah, he ain't filled.

Have you ever thought about selling pictures? Bill Robertson was the only man I know that could walk up a 45-degree hill, a muddy 45-degree hill. hill. It's because he had eight toes. Hey, he would never slip and he'd go all the way to the top. Eight toes will do that. Nobody else did not do it because, hey, you know, he didn't have feet.

He had bunion. No. He had mud grips. Which are bunions. Which is his bunions are about side. His bunyan was about to side. Did he go to the skyjacker and get them put on? Yeah.

They were wild. I mean, yeah. I'd seen him. He had ugly feet. Oh, yeah. Why we got it? I mean, if you were at Duck Commander Sunday, Jace went off on his feet.

I was say, if you're at Duck Commander Sunday, is a Jace or really? It was Jace. The boy had just horrible-looking feet. A lot going on. Good thing a man wasn't known for his feet. It kind of was. That's why, that's it.

Well, he was known for his feet. Okay. But that was just one thing he was known for. Praise God. He was known for killing Miler Ducks. And ugly feet, and that's it. He was known. for sharing Jesus with everybody.

There we go. It does make me wonder. Sharing Jesus. Yeah. Hey. The guy of killing ducks. Yeah. And bunions.

And ugly feet. Ugly feet. It makes me wonder what Phil would have called himself had he observed. You know, because he's always, he always liked to make fun of like. Who those big things? That would have been. Yeah. What would Phil's nickname for himself?

Oh, yeah. That would be a good. Hey, what's up her big toe? Like, I don't know. It would have been wild. Yeah. Yeah. What's up her call?

I mean, I don't know what he'd have called himself. It'd be probably some name of some mud grip tires or something. Yeah. Oh, he'd have probably used, what is it, Latin? Uh-oh. Some of Latin term. Wait, is Spy Kids the movie where the... What?

Well, what? Look, listen, here where I'm going. Isn't it the movie where there's, like, thumbs as people? Yeah. Is that the one? Yeah, we're going to have to... That's going to be your guy to confirm, right? Yeah, we're going to let the younger generation tune into this.

Yeah, pull that up. That could be a new name. Thumbs? You'll see what I'm talking about. All of a sudden. sudden this deal of first grade is making a lot more sense now with that second. Spike kids. I was going to say this earlier.

I was going to say this earlier. I only went to summer school one year. I guess I, Kool-Aid and Moon Pie will make you sit in your desk. What in the world are you kids watching? This was Spy Kids. You don't know this movie? No.

I feel like you would have watched this, you know? No. You were like 20 when this came up. Yeah, you'd love it. No, I wouldn't. Yeah. That looks vulgar. That was the character in the movie.

It was like... My kids. Oh, man. It was like their minions. 3D modeling. Wait, time out. What are we doing? Why did we put a bunch of VNA sausages with a red herd on?

Hey, don't forget the tone now. I'm a disturbed. What year did this movie come out? My kids, I think, is this the one that Taylor? No, that's Shark Boy and Lava Girl, all right? What? Yeah, same director. Same director, though, yeah.

How? I'll tell you, this is like a... Martin, we're old. This movie did a lot of... It was very big, huh? Yeah. What did it do in sales, or something.

It was a big movie. Oh, man. This is a movie when I grew up. We didn't do driving movies. We did thumb people, you know what I mean? Don't get back on them. How cares? How cares?

Watch somebody kill somebody. We just had thumbs walking around. You had thumb people walking around. That came out in 2001. Yeah. So I was 12. Okay, 12. Okay, I did it too far.

Oh, but I had never saw it. Yeah. I was 16. I must have been preoccupied. Hold on. And Cheech and Chong are in this movie. Really? What are we doing?

I missed a lot when I was growing up. You were too busy getting dropped off. Hey, buddy. I don't know what I was. Hey, buddy. You busy watching people comb their hair. In 2001, you weren't growing up. You were grown.

Well, I know, but I'm not. That was when you started your vapor rub. Hey, what years are you talking about? 2001. 2001, yeah, yeah. What did you watch? You didn't have thumb people whenever you were watching the black and white pictures shows? You were in the space oddity.

2001 is space oddity? Yeah, yeah. Interesting. Yeah. I was back in the old day. That's a David Bowie song. I was back in ancient time. Yeah.

It's a movie 2001 of Space Odyssey. Oh, I thought he said Audit. I love how. I don't know what I said. Can we just go back to the fact that Hunter was like, oh yeah, same director on children's movies? He's just like the same age as me. How old are you, Hunter?

I'm 25. Yeah, I'm 26. Y'all was into worlds I didn't even know about. And they both grew up south of the interstate. Yeah. I grew up in Ruston. Oh. I grew up in Rustle.

Oh, you just come back to over here? I mean, south of the interstate. I grew up from ages 1 to 3. I was in Pawkinville and then I was in Westwood. Hey, that's all it takes. Hey, we might have crossed past. I spent a lot of time. I had silver teeth back then.

Did you go to summer school in first grade? Well, I went to Claver and so I just... Wait, hold on now. That's where I went. I played football for the Yellow Jackets. What, whoa. Practiced out by that cemetery? We were terrible.

Well, that's why I played for him. If you hung out on Martin Shack. street like 2002 to 12 there's a little silver teeth gremlin running around a little silver teeth grumbling running around all your teeth were silver i mean the ones that i had i knocked out all four my front teeth when i was three so i didn't have any teeth to about third grade what caused that uh i was in a high chair and like i said i didn't like to sit down i was just going back and forth and we were at a restaurant and i hit my face on the table in a restaurant in a restaurant what restaurant please say captain i don't i don't think it was in town oh but

I knocked out all four of my front teeth, and then my second tooth to the right, I cut it in half and, like, killed the root in it. So when it grew back, it was like a Dorito chip. Oh, Dorado chip. Yeah. People used to be like, you got something on your tooth, and I'd be like, yeah, it's going to be that way for a while. You had a grill before grills were. Man, I had a grill from personal self. I created, I guess, myself.

You know, it's well documented. I had a queen-sized bed, and I get made fun of for that. But I still had to have rails on that because I'd fall out of it. All that room, I was just toss and turning, moving around. Pissing everywhere. Hey, my buddy Reese fell out of a top bunk at Camp Chioca one time. One of the greatest stories of all time. We're all asleep and you just hear,

thud. That kid fell about five foot from that top bunk. And we all look over and he's like, wakes up. But it hit him so hard, he just started puking. Oh, wow. So then the counselor's got this six-year-old kid. that's just puking and it's like a machine gun going off. He just goes and holds them out the door.

Yeah, look like a sprinkler. It's a bad deal. Oh, man. You didn't want to be reased that day. He was never the same. Oh, Lord. Yeah. Laudy B.

Yeah. Anyway, yeah, I fell out of the bed a lot. Fell out of the bed. Yeah. Is that, that's a thing, right? No. I don't remember falling out. They should have got you some, like, boundaries.

I did. Well, I had to put rails up on the bed. They should have built a fence around your bed. I know. We've been looking at, like, regular. bed for the boys and they all have they're all like boxed in not crib style but basically they have they have one entrance and one exit for the boys now we had these big old blue things you had to put under the mattress and raise up so you didn't fall out the bed do you nobody else had those

do you still do that uh they could have just got you a hospital bed they was that a side effect of the nose spray you think like restless sleeping or something or right this is just how i lived my life he's a roma yeah i move he's a ramble you know me i don't like sitting still this This podcast is hard enough to sit here for 50 minutes. Yeah. And so I guess when I sleep, I just move a lot. Scott had that. Did Scott fall out to bed?

No, no. He had to, he couldn't sit still. No. No chance. I think a lot of people have that. But he didn't fall out to bed? Well, because my wife, you know, falling out of the bed is crazy. He was always going up here, I was a principal or the teacher.

Were you asleep when you would fall out of the bed? Yeah, I'd wake up on the ground. That's crazy. So what was that like? Yeah. Well, you just, well, you got used to it. Are you scared to go in a sleep? No, I don't remember a time when it didn't happen.

Like, I, well, eventually you put the rails up. I don't understand it. So do you still do that today? I haven't fallen out to bed in a while, I don't think. I don't know. I don't understand it. Oh, she gets mad. I go to sleep.

And then the next thing, I wake up, I'm on the floor. You two? Well, I was just talking about it. Well, I've done that before, but it was induced. I've woke up on just like the total opposite end of the bed. Like my feet were where my head is supposed to be. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, that's weird. You're a Roma. Bella's done that. Yeah, some people just move in their sleep. Like, what have you had a dream? Oh, hey, I'm married to one. Yeah. That checks.

Brittany takes up three quarters of a bed at night because she ends up in like the crime scene positions. Or sleeping diagonal. She starts off in a little ball curled up with a fella and by the time I wake up, it's hands and feet. Oh, no, I'm saying way. Ooh. I totally destroy a sheets, a cover, all that.

If me and Allison go to a hotel and they got two doubles, girl, get you on. And she fully supports it. Oh, wow. If you want to hang out for a minute, come on over. But then you got to go back to yours. Does she make you stay in the one by the door? Because that's what Britton.

Oh, yeah, for sure. Because there's a lot of people that break into hotel rooms and capture you. Yeah. Yeah. Why do girls think that? Bella's the same way. A lot of Lifetime movies. Yeah.

I don't know. Too much time on Instagram. Do y'all's wives, can they sleep? with the covers over their head. That is like... John Luke can. That is the craziest thing I've ever heard of in my life.

Bella will pull the covers over her head and go to sleep like that. That's a family thing. Me and John Luke? No, that is a problem. That's a turtle maneuver. I can one up you. My girlfriend sleeps face first in the pillow.

Whoa! She sleeps like this? Yes. Face forward? I don't get it. Yeah, that's pretty wild. I don't get how she can read. One time, me and John Luke shared a room

when we went to Spokane. Spokane. get cold? Oh yeah, if I get cold, I don't know, I get those hands and I snuggling up. I woke up like an hour before John Luke and I looked over and I almost like called 911 because he was just underneath and I was like, hey, bro, get out for your face. And he was like, no, I'm cool.

And then he went back under. No, I'm cool. And I was like, I don't like this. Turtle maneuver. Yeah, I couldn't do that. I think the turtle maneuver is a different maneuver. Well, no, no, no. Does he ever have gas under there?

Then you'd have to come out. Hey, I like the other. I'm not going to say that because I'm going to the dog house. I'm going to say anyone that's undercovers can do what they call that a much oven. What's the turtle? Anyone can be a culprit of the garage. He just closes the door.

A garage. Box turtle? Yeah. Yeah, he did close that front flag. Yeah, he just closed his, close the door. I was just talking about a different type of turtle than, you know what I mean? Oh, turtle heads. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The, wow. I'm the exact opposite of all the, I barely. want a sheet on me when I say. Yeah, I can only... Oh, no. It's one a time. It depends on the weather. I like it so heavy you can't, that you have trouble moving.

You know, they make like weighted blankets. You ain't got to do all that. Oh, no, no, no, but it's just better if it's heavy. So I put your dumbbells around his covers and his bed so he can't get out. He just tucks him in every night. You know, this is an awful lot of work for a man that pee six times a night. How do you get out? How do you get out?

Oh, I get up and up and out. You got to pee, you get rejuvenated. You become hercules. I did one time in the weighted blanket craze when everybody wanted one. I was like, I'm going to get Allison one because I'm such a good husband. But I didn't know what weight you should do. Obviously, in my house, the heaviest one they have. What is it?

No bigger going home, right? That sucks. You go underneath that. All of a sudden, you're just asleep. Just stuck. And you're stuck there when you wake up and you panic for a second. That's when you need life alert. No, no, there's no air pockets on that.

No. Because it's so heavy, it's formed. fitting. Yeah, that sounds like. There's no little spots. Have you ever had a weighted blanket? Huh? Have you ever had a weighted blanket?

No, I just, Oh, we're about to change your life. I just put so many on. How many blankets is so many? Oh, I put quilts on. How many? How many? All of them.

Three or four. Three or four? Oh, yeah. I like it where I just had to slide in. It's so heavy. A little sobri-a-a-old. Hey, it's hard to turn over. Have you ever soiled the first blanket?

The closest one to you? Oh, yeah. Does Christine ever swaddle you? Huh, no. You should try that. When I get cold? I got some things that we have for the boys of Velcro. I could wrap you up like a little.

Hey, what's that thing? Like a little papoose. Yeah, what's that little thing they have for kids, the weighted baby? Oh, yeah. Sleep sex. Yeah. We need to get you one. No, no, I've seen that down at the baby shop.

What if we had Sal one in the world is this? They said, oh, it's a swat oil. It's like a weighted snuggy. Yeah, I said, what? They said swat on. It's called like Dreamland We bought one. The boys didn't like it.

I don't know if I'd like it. This is just a wrap. Gang, for 9999, we can get an adult swaddle. We can wrap. And wrap it up. We can wrap up like a cocoon. Also, shout out to the model here

because I don't think there's enough money you could pay me to be on this website looking like this. That just looks like a snuggy. Oh, there is. Well, yeah, that definitely is. I mean, just a matter. You got your price.

He's a full-grown man with a beard that is swaddled on the internet. He's in a spandex snuggy. But you can't see his eyes. You know what I mean? That's good. Plausible. Actually, that's me, guys. I've been meaning to tell you.

Also, what? How do you sleep with a pillow straight up like that? This doesn't. Who sleeps? Who sleeps on a bed? No good. Huh? It ain't nothing worse to go to a hotel.

And they got five pillows on the bed. Oh, yeah. I use all of them. No, no. And you got a pile all five of. of them and then lay down because all you do, when you do that, you go all the way of the mattress. Yeah, that's not supposed to.

There ain't nothing in the pillow. I'll use zero pillows. You're talking about, sorry. Really? My wife hates my pillows because I like this thin because I've had them since high school. I don't like a lot of heads like putting my head. I don't want my head up. I want to be flat.

I want to be flat. I want it to be tall. My head too big to be below my shoulders. And never get back up. You know, I ain't. got no neck either so like it's just i just realized that yeah i had you said that i've never noticed that my whole life yeah i don't have a neck like i don't know do any weightlifting uh huh you weight lifting you much weight lifting no i just think it's a deformity i think it's just genetic yeah i'm pretty

sure it's just big part i'm pretty sure just the years of weight of my head just it's you know what this more comfortable like it's just more comfortable just just get right there where it kind of rest He was trying to be a turtle, but it wasn't no room. Hey, having not a long neck's probably a good thing. It was a good thing for an offensive lineman. I never got my neck hurt. Bad thing if you're a giraffe. Well, think if somebody tried to get your neck, you know, choke you out or break your neck.

It would be hard. We've got so much space. No neck is a lineman deal anyway. Yeah. Is it? I mean, it could be from years. Could be years of repeated abuse of my face going into something. That and running back, short running back.

Yeah. What? No neck. No neck. They just go, like this. It's a head. Shoulders going down. Knees and toes, you know what I mean?

Would you rather be five foot tall or seven foot tall? Ooh, that's a good question. I'm in between. I don't want to be. It's one of the other. That's one of the other. Hey, I don't hold up one. You have to pick.

You have to pick. Well, I'd be seven foot tall. I knew it. But then you had to duck everywhere you go. You could never go to Asia. No. I'm thinking about when you get in a fight. I'll have further to fight.

How many seven foot people have you ever seen in a fight? In a fight? Yeah. Oh, I've seen them all the time in the fight. Oh, well. Oh my gosh. They fight every time they get on the court. What?

What? What? So are you insidio? Well, you'd rather be, hey, 6-8 and weigh 400 pounds or 6-8 and weigh 180 pounds. Well, I would love to see what you look like at 6. How would you say again? Six-eight. Both are 6-8 at 140 pounds?

Yeah, 180 pounds. 180 pounds. All weigh 450, like Shaq did. Shack did weigh no 450. Hey, he did too. He was like six, eight, and weighed 450 pounds. Then when he got in and on the basket, he would knock the guy out of the way, dumped the ball,

and everybody would drink. At 450 pounds. Oh, he's so great. Is it, are you about, you knock everybody away, you ain't great. Jack would have fouled out the first three minutes of the game of the referee. So, Cy hate Shaq?

Shaq, uh, Sa has a lot of slander towards Shaquille O'Neill on this podcast. Well, I mean, hey, he wasn't as great as everybody's claiming him to be. that's right Tom Brady's up I'm not going to stand for any more Shaquille O'Neill's slander

yeah he was good what do you mean? I'd like to see Shashash hey can we just look up Shaquille O'Neill's height and weight please I want to 7-1-324 okay okay

I was close same thing hey I was close four inches and 125 pound but you know they never did call the foul on it that's because they were scared

he was going to beat him up yeah well hey good new referee You're the size of a dumb, dummy gum gum gum. That's back when basketball was basketball, man. Yeah. No, that was when basketball was just a fight. That's what I'm talking about.

Yeah, back when it was fun to watch. Way more entertaining than the shooting contest it is now. I think his real skill is in the commentary now, though. Him and Charles Barkley together's the team. Well, no, no, no, that's never knew we needed. He's funny. Both of them, hey, Charles, I love you. When Charles gets shack tickled, that's one of my favorite things.

No, no, no, I get, I love Charles Barkley. Yeah. I would do anything. He might be closer to 400. Charles Barkley might be close to 400. Being Willie, we're at a charity golf tournament, and Charles Barkley played behind us, and it was one of the funniest days of the life.

But he is the largest human being, I think. Oh, yeah. He's a man. He was huge. And he booed Willie whenever they introduced him, and I laughed so hard. That's Charles Barkley. They were like up next to the tea,

and all of a sudden I hear, boo! And I was like, who's booing Willie? Oh, hey, yeah, although that's Charles Walkley. That's my friend, Charles. That's all the child. He's in the same league as, uh, uh, what's the guy on the, uh, uh, Kirk Herk Herb Street's dog?

No. I'm looking at. Do you hate her? Do you hate Kirk, Gers? I just hate his dog. Is his dog still alive? Dave Harvey. He's got a new one.

Oh, he's got a new one. Did you say lots of teeth? Oh. Couldn't just go with family feud? Well, he went right here. So I figured he was talking about Steve Hart. I could think of family feud. I watch Family Feud every day at 4.30.

But Buckley, Barclay and Steve Harvey have got a lot of stuff in common. Slow time of year, Jacob. All right, Harvey's going to tell it like it is. They had a bunch of four. He had a, they dressed up as women. Drag queen? Drag queen. Oh, yeah.

Oh, when Chris Farley was a chipp-in-mills. He had a bunch of them on Family Feudges other night, and Utah got, wow. So you like watching drag queen? That was the funniest thing to watch Because every time Steve Hart would say something One of them would say something else Mm-hmm That's generally how conversations were

And it went on and on So are you saying that you Steve Harvey was going to do the looks he does Oh yeah I'm gonna need you find that Bible Yeah Wait I'm gonna I'm desperately needed an escape

But I don't know how family few drag queens Got us here You're saying that you enjoyed a drag queen family feud episode. Oh, it was hilarious. This is very interesting. Okay, to be fair, probably was. And they're all, all of them

really ganged up on Steve. Thigh, what's the price tag to dress you up like a drag queen? Yeah. Yeah, what's the price? How much does that take? Is it less? How much does that take? Is it more or less than $150,000?

Okay, well, definitely less. Billions, how many zeros? No. You're a cafe. wrong. You wore a boa Aunt Duck Dynasty and they didn't pay you a billion. Yeah. You slide in here with 10 Gs and throw them on that table. My man said, where's makeup?

He said, where's hair and makeup? My man said, where's hair and makeup? Give me some vapor rub real quick. What's the I am always at him? Yeah. So I said, I can't be bought, but I can dang sure be running. I can be riddened. I need you to reach out to Family Feud and get this podcast on

on Family Feud. Oh, that'd be wow. You and the lead, Martin. I would not be good. Well, we'll probably put you at the end. If they'd be in. Because of the game, I would not be good. Oh, so?

Yeah. I wouldn't be hilarious. Okay, but I wouldn't be... He knows he'd be hilarious. I like a man who knows his strengths. That's right. I would suck at Family Feud, but I would be hilarious. He ain't dumb.

Oh, no. Hey, man's got to know his limitations. Yeah. I mean, I'm not good at games. Okay. You're good at a magic. I'm good at wit and imagination. That's that.

And I can, I can, uh, go ahead. I'm waiting. Yeah. That's why you couldn't be okay. Yeah, that's why. I don't work good under pressure. We just got the big X. All right, let's get out of here.

We lose. Hey, look, this girl came up to me and said, hey, I just got something to tell you. Uh, she felt like she needed to, she'd stumbled upon something from the Lord. She felt like, and she didn't know it to do, and that document her Sunday, She said, I think it's for you. And I said, okay. And she gave me a Bible verse. And I was like, all right, which one?

Matthew, Mark, Luke John. She said, Josea said, all right, now I'm listening because that's from somewhere. I don't think a lot of people just hang out there. But Josea 6, 1 through 3. Come, let us return to the Lord. He has torn us to pieces, but he will heal us. He has injured us, but he will bind up our wounds. After two days, he will revive us.

On the third day, he will restore us that we may live in his presence. Let us acknowledge the Lord. Lord, let us press on to acknowledge him. As surely as the sun rises, he will appear. He will come to us like the winter rains, like the spring rains that water the earth. That's a good one. And I met a lot of people on Duck Commander Sunday who, like, I think I was just out in the crowd a lot.

So they told me so I could tell Cy and Martin and all these guys that, uh, they'd been going through some stuff. And I even saw this guy praying over one of them, which was really cool. But they basically said, this podcast just. keep some company and unashamed's going to keep doing what they're doing and we're going to keep being weird and talking about weird stuff and trying to just be uh show you the joy of the lord so i feel like that's our job and i appreciate all the people that reached out and said that and that girl that bible verse i was like that's kind of a banger and i'm mildly concerned with how many

nickel nips are about to show up here nickel nips oh gross do not swallow them side yeah quit that all right all right well the whole thing in your mouth is one it plus for flavor.