Duck Call Room - Uncle Si’s Midnight Rendezvous With a State Trooper

Episode Date: June 13, 2023

Uncle Si had an eventful evening that led to a surprise encounter with the State Police and so did Phil! John-David and his family were entertained and disgusted by some zoo animals during their latest visit, and Phillip is a fountain of information about the names of animal groupings. Martin is very disappointed in John-David over a missed opportunity for a prank at Jep’s daughter’s wedding reception. The mailbag has the boys give some marriage advice to a couple looking to tie the knot after a brief dating period and have a good laugh over a couple who got a surprise pedicure together. A fan writes in with a story about someone you’d never want to suffer the “yips” – a nurse! -- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

90, 10, 120 plopper. 13.49 to get you proper. It's a great song. There you go. It's a great song. My wife. Any Hoosers. Are you ready, Hunter?

Are you ready, Martin? Are you ready, Sa? Sure. Let's start the show. Oh, that's it. We're back. I was expecting something extremely profound from me with that kind of intro. Everybody was ready.

You could have. Lisa, welcome back, folks. Welcome back. There you go. I might sing this whole episode. I wish you would. I'm going to try and sing all the commercials. That'll be cool. He's in a good mood today.

He is in a good mood. You know why? Because I know what he did yesterday. He got some good sleep last night? He had a big day. What happened? We went, you remember at that time we went to a zoo over in Texas and we're all excited about the last thing being the rhino.

And instead, we got like 15 goats. Yes. We made it right. We went back. There's a rhino now. Oh, they got a rhino. Really? They got a rhino.

Everybody's happy. Tyler, Texas is made right on the goat to rhino exchange. Okay. Did they call you and say, hey, we got it right? No, a bunch of people just sent me a message and said, hey, they got a rhino now. We waited for summer. Summer came, and we took off three hours to go to Tyler, Texas, and then drive back home. And I was in home in time for fried pork chops from Big Dave.

It was a good day. See, that's what I'm talking. I knew he had a good day. That's a good day. He sent me a picture of an elephant. Them elephants are gross at the Tyler Zoo. Uh-oh, they're gross. Them things is nasty.

Uh-oh. Because last time we watched them wrestle, Martin said they weren't wrestling. And I, yeah, I don't think they're wrestling anymore. But then yesterday, there's like a little viewing area. And it's pretty cool.

There's like some steps. And you're close. And this one elephant's eating and his guys rear in towards the crowd. Well, uh-oh. I mean, that elephant lost at least 25 pounds. And it was like over a three-minute period of time. And that falls from a really long height.

So then there's a gross sound when it hits the ground, too. And my kids are like, ugh. And Allison's like, nasty. But we got to stay and watch them. And I'm like, why? And then one of the elephants walks over, puts his trunk in the pile. Boom, boom, boom. And then eats it.

And this one girl is that. oh Lord no and she ran I was like well that's and but I had just eaten lunch and then I got a smell from the from the like the the chicken nuggets that we'd all just eat and hit me and then the that hit me and I'm

I'm literally gagging in the zoo trying not to puke people are filming it oh it's terrible well hey look the all of them today I just got to try it and see if it was really as good as it was the first time just so you know it went back for seconds and then I gagged again. All I'll tell you is it must have been

good. Dipping dots will never be the same. They must have talked about that like you did for that Biscuit from Texas. Oh yeah. Boy, this is the best grass I ever had. That's right. Really? I've got to hit it again. Well, really? Because there's about 90% of it left right there. Let me try it. It'd be easier for me to break down. Oh, was it nasty. Oh, it was nasty.

It kind of put a weird spin on the day. Luckily it was almost over at that point. It was tough. It was gross. That's tough. Animals are nasty, y'all. So, yeah, you got a full-service experience on the elephants. Oh, yeah, it was, I mean.

Elephant rut to elephant butt. I've seen the elephants do all sorts of things. If you're ever into just real nature, head on over to the Caldwell Zoo, it is a nice zoo. It's like small, but it's super nice. We have fun. And a white tiger, but not a black panther. Shocker. Monroe Zoo got a black panther.

The white tiger was a black panther. beautiful too. Oh, it was sweet. Yep. It walked right up to us. Oh, yep. Did you edit? Well, there was glass.

I ain't interested in wrestling in a white tiger. I can't remember who was not, who in Vegas, it used to be a, they was. That was, Sigman and Freud. Okay. Yeah. And they, they was, they had a lot of white tiger. I was just going to ask if that was a Sigman and Freud washout. I wonder if.

No, no, it probably, it probably was. It probably was. Didn't one of them get eaten by the line? Yeah, he got bald. Sure it is. But did the... Did he take him out? I don't know.

No, they didn't kill it. It didn't kill him. But it hurt him really bad. It didn't mess your day up. Yeah, no, no. It hurt him really bad. I ain't never heard anybody back home for a pork job dinner after a tiger gets a whole to do it.

But, hey, Dave had an interview with him afterwards. Really? Oh, yeah. And it was in his home. He's got like a couple of pet tigers living with him. Still? Yeah. He was, during the interview, you know, the tigers, you know,

and he's licking him, you know, licking his face as you know. So it didn't, it didn't deter him from loving, loving tigers. Oh, no. Yeah. He said it was his fault. That tiger's name was Manticore. That's a cool name. Well, I'd have bit him too.

No. Look at how pretty, though. Look at them blue eyes. Imagine that poor tiger going to kindergarten, having to spell Manticore. I'd have been mad. God. What is your name? I hope it's a bandico.

What in the world? Yeah. Why don't you just call me like Tony, bro? What's the problem with here? It don't matter. And that tiger, I mean, that is a beautiful animal, though. Frosted flakes are not more than good. That's exactly what they are.

They're great. No, they're just regular good. They're just, they're basic. They're just all right. Oh, man. Anyways, yeah, we had a fun time. We love a good weekend, run to somewhere, run straight home, have a good time with the kids. It's what you do.

We were in the middle of our first full weekend of sleep training. Oh, we're still in a sleep training, boys. No, officially. Officially. Okay. Yeah, the other has been like our interpretation of it, but now we're on a program. Now you've read a book. Online.

Oh, now you watch a YouTube video? No, I paid for a service online. Do you have somebody coming to your house? So far, yeah. The name's taking care of babies. It's kind of cool. Martin, does somebody come and help you during this time? No.

Just you and Brittany. Just me and Brittany. And Brittany, it's a lot rougher on her than it is on me because the crying bothers her. Man. She's a light of sleeper. Big Hooty and the Blowfish fan. Yeah.

Yeah, let them cry. Just let her cry. That's what we did. I had to. No, but the crazy thing is, That's why I text you about that storm, like, because they had just fallen asleep on their own. Everything was good. And then it started hailing at the house and started hitting the window.

And then it woke them up. And I was like, you know, I was like, oh, hail. It'll get you. The hell will get you. I mean. You're on earth and in the afterlife. I was just like. It's never enjoyable.

I just, I was so mad that it had finally worked. And then that happened. I was like, unbelievable. Storm wake them up. Yeah. It felt like, man, should we be doing this? But yeah, we're going to keep doing it. it. But nighttime, we're golden. They, they suck at naps. That's the problem. Nighttime, they sleep like

10 to 11 hours every night. I never napped as a kid, ever. Yeah, I'm beginning to think we may have, but the crazy thing is, like, they alternate their good naps generally. Like, so we're just trying to get them on somewhat of the same schedule so mom can plan and do things during the day. So it's, I don't know, there's two of them. That's wild. So it's just double the work. And June 23rd is a big day, Johnny D. For me. What's June 23rd? I made the appointment today. Oh. Uh-oh. We want to do a podcast from there?

Yeah. I will attend. Yeah. I won't like hold your hand or anything, but I'll sit in the room and make jokes to make it more comfortable. That's fine. If you want to save money, you can let Sine do it for you. No, hold on. No, no. No, so I ain't going to do that. It's a burning process, not a cutting process. process. Well, there is a cut. There's a and then a and then a and then a

and then a s and then you're good. I don't care. You want to sit down for three days after those noises. Yeah. But get your Xbox or something because you don't need to move. Then the lady taking all my information on the phone or whatever. She's like, do you need to come in for a consult? I said, no ma'am, I'm

ready. When's you first opening? Yeah, I went in for the consult and then I went right back to the room. Yeah. I said, I don't need you double checks with it i don't need to be talked in or out of this i'm ready i'll give you my wife's phone number she's ready like let's roll he says like this is like a tattoo there's no going back that's fine oh wait that's a lot there is going back you can't no no you can't go back if you even have an inkling in your mind you don't do it it's not easy to go back that's a lot of snipping

and snapping no one of my best friends did it yeah and he went back yeah clay did Oh. I had what I call the world's dumbest surger. What? A reverse vasectomy. I wouldn't do it. I consider it to be the world's dumbest surgery. You know, hey, whatever.

It seems like that's a firm decision. Once you clog that pipe off. It's done. It's, you're done. Let's explore other options. But, no, I'm not going back. That's not true. What?

Because I had the man change his brain and said, hey, I want another child. He had one too. He did. Hey. I'm kind of with sigh, like if you want to do it. Well, no, I mean, it's a tough decision to make. And then if something that you didn't plan for happens, life happens, and then, hey, you got to have a decision to make.

Yeah. They made the decision. He flew to Arizona to have it done. Hey. I will buy like a specialist. That's why. Well, to be fair, to be completely fair, if you are going to do, If you're going to, you, specialist is a word you want.

Yeah. That's not, like, you don't want to walk out of there and then go to Quisnos next door. Yeah, you don't want to go. This is not amateur night. Like, you want to fly somewhere for sure. Oh, no, no, this is not amateur night. No, no. You ain't letting stuff happen down there that's like, oh, whatever. Hey, there's that guy, you know, he's over there between Subway and Quiznos.

It'd fix you, nah. Get on a plane and go somewhere. We could go on the black market and get it for a lot cheaper than you done for you. No. This ain't a chiropractor. Just kidding all you capriced. You say you need a real doctor? Oh.

Hey, Drew. Drew's my best friend. You got chiropractor. He's not listening. You got chiropractors and dentists all in one shot there, buddy. There you go. That's good. And now we're going with the dentist.

See? Well, he said real doctor. Medical doctor. There you go. MD. There you go. Like a psychiatrist. Yeah, not the ones that go to their own school.

That's cool. Why is the TV not working? I don't. I have a picture. But look, let's get it figured out while we take a break. Hold on. When we come back, we need to talk about Si getting arrested last night. Oh, I'm in.

I didn't know. I got arrested? I heard you got pulled over. Let's get the story. All right, look, springtime is here. It's warming up. You know what that means? That means more outside cooking.

And y'all know we love to eat beef around here. And that's what because of our friends over at Triedale's beef makes such a good product, baby. Ain't it good? It's so good. Our friend, Sao Robertson, would say, buy on the grill. Look, before we got Tritels, getting ready for a cookout, man, somebody had to run the grocery store, do all the things, grab whatever was left in case you were late in the day. And you never really know where that beef comes from. But with Tritels beef, we skip the grocery store and do it a different way.

Tritales comes from a family ranch out in Texas. They're a fifth generation American ranch. So they've been at it for a while. Now, look, the beef comes straight from their ranch and other ranchers they work with. who raise cattle the same way. Their steaks are properly aged and shipped straight from the ranch to your door. We threw a couple of ribbys on the grill. Look, salt, pepper, garlic, hot fire, that's all you need.

Look, because I tell you what, when the beef comes from people who raise cattle for a living, you can taste the difference. The tenderness and the flavor are fantastic. So if you're stocking the freezer for grilling season, go check out Tritale's beef. I know in size case Christine loves it, which is just a, she doesn't eat meat. being a big meat easier, folks. Yeah. Just go to trybeef.com slash.

That's trybeef.com slash support ranch families and eat some dang good steak. Look how close to them elephants were. I mean, that. Oh. This is the lady that yelled, oh, no, rant. The gagging's making more sense. I was, this is my view of when it happened. I mean, look, up close and personal with three nasty creatures.

Look, they was helping. This is the entertainment. Second one. Oh, that's the pile? I will say. They were trained to do this. No, no, that's right. This is the entertainment part of the entertainment.

Hey, guys. Step right up. They said, hey, all right, boys. Y'all ready? Everybody back up to the back. And hey, show them what happens. Show them what you got. It was very educational.

Very educational. Hold on. I got it. What's one of them ate it? This guy, right here on the left. He had them hungry eyes. I was making sure. That was the pooper.

That was the eater. Who's the pooper? The one that's at about a half squat right now. Yeah. That's there? Yeah, he ain't done yet. No, no, no, no. It kept, I'm telling you, it took three minutes, which, I mean, that's kind of normal.

I've been there. Been there, done that. I ain't ever left that kind of pile, and I certainly ain't had nobody come fishing. But look, look, notice this video. There's less people. Remember that girl that was standing beside this guy? She's gone. I never saw her again.

And look, he's getting a better angle. Yeah. Look at him. She's gone. Uh-oh. He's running away. And down. That's enough.

I didn't ask any of these people. people permission to use this video but that's fine we all laugh they're in a public place we all laughed and cried together anyways you got arrested what happened well i didn't get arrested tell us what happened last night i'm heart and i got busted out so i left and evidently okay i was a shocker kind of i guess what you say eased over to the right too much speeding time time no he wasn't speeding it was swerving swerving what time of clock was this one o'clock A.m.? Yeah, a.m.

A.m. Okay. A.m. Nothing good happens. And the state trooper, he puts lights on. Thank you, sir. I pull up in a filling station. You know, and at first, I'm sitting there, and I got my wallet and got my

driver's lines that with the window roll down. Is there any money in your wallet? No. No. No. No. Anyway, he's standing back there. He came out of that.

He came out of his way. He stayed in the back there behind the car. Okay. And just stayed. So I thought he was going to come up to the window. Did he recognize you? And finally. And finally, no, he just finally said, you know, and I got out, went back to him.

He said, are you not now off? And I said, no, sir. I said, I'm not, I'm not sleepy. He said, well, you're swerving a little bit there from one side to the other. I said, I may have been. And he said, I just got through with your people. And I said, who's my people? And he said, Phil and Kay.

Oh. He said, they will side swipe, you know, in an accident. Phil and Kay, now they were in a rap? Yeah, last night. Are they okay? Yeah, well, nobody was hurt. Was this? That was my first question.

I said, anybody hurt? And he said, no, it was just, you know, got outside wiped them. This is what happened when people over 75 drive. Yeah, what time was this at? Hey, look, don't be joking about my age. What, no, no, what time was, what time was feeling chaos? I don't know. That I don't know.

I can promise you it wasn't at 1 a.m. Well, no, no. He said he just got done. I'll just tell you this. At 6 o'clock, I left my house. Mm-hmm. Okay, we're driving to Monroe. Mm-hmm.

Yeah, between 6 to 6.30. Well, when I'm looking, here comes sirens and cop cars, two ambulances, then three cop cars, and then another pickup truck with lights on it. Past your road? Yeah, heading, you know, south on 34. Yeah. So I was saying, hmm, that must be in a car accident somewhere

or something happening. Yeah, and then, like last night, when the state trooper pulled me over. Yeah. So did he? He knew who you were and he said, hey, he knew. He said, I know your people. So, yeah.

Since he said, I was just with your people. That's what was funny. He said, I was just with your people. I was waiting. Who was my people? The poker guys? Well, because you could be part of a lot of crowds. Well, that's all about.

The bingo crowd? Yeah, I mean. Yeah. Like. So he talked to me for like five minutes and he said, okay, you know, drive safe. I said, I will. Where'd you get pulled over? Huh?

Right there at Johnny's Pizza, the next light. Where the paper meal is. Yeah. Oh. Right there's what, Circle K or whatever. Oh, yeah. Yeah, right there. You had just passed up, Commander.

Oh, yeah. I just pulled in, yeah. You should have told him he's leaving work. Man, we need some breath. Then he would have got arrested for line. No, hey, that was just our policing. Okay. Checking and making sure everything.

is right. Did you get his name? Huh? I know. He told me his name, but hey, I'm terrible with names. He said, I'm state trooper so-and-so. Send him a thank you, Carnie. I got a few buddies from my school that are state troopers.

Well, no, no. Now, that's why I was wondering if it was any of them, I was going to text him. This was a young, young, good-looking guy, okay? Was it me? Probably 30. Next time, maybe below 30. So, have you, and I've been with you before when you've been pulled over several times. I've never seen you get a ticket.

but quick getting pulled over hey no i have got a ticket recently in the last 10 years no no no this was younger no this was before duck dynasty yeah i mean since duck dynasty there's no way they they would give you a ticket huh nothing good happens after midnight i'll tell you you could have left the poker game at midnight still with some money in your pocket yep wouldn't have i should have i thought about it and then i was having too much fun what were you doing to be swerving right through here though well i don't know i just having a radio or not the paying attention. Have you ever rode with him?

Yeah, he generally goes so fast, he can't go crooked. Well, no, no, but I normally drive really good. Okay. Hold on. I normally drive really good driver. Oh, here we go. Okay, because, hey, you don't ever know what you're going to see at night. It wasn't the road.

Boy, ain't that the truth. I'm telling you. Especially on the, I can tell you some scary stories. Especially the route you got to travel to go home. Oh, no. You got that little bottleneck right out there. No, no. I'm telling you.

Yeah. I was heading south on 34. Sal, are you always armed and dangerous? Well, I'll just say this. He's armed. I don't know about danger. My motto is, hey, be prepared. So I'll just leave it to that.

I'm prepared. He took the Lion King to heart. There you go. Yeah. I'm prepared. Be prepared. There it is. That sounds like the JG.

Webliff commercial. This is for all we all out there. 877 cash nine. I don't word this. You might have the wrong attitude toward our police. Uh-oh. Okay. Look, they've got a job to do to protect the citizens,

and they do it to the best of their ability. Yeah. And nobody knows there's 76-year-old swirms all over the road at 1 a.m. I had a cop come to the house yesterday morning, so I agree. For what? I guess he wanted to wake my kids up from their morning nap. Was this one of your friends? No, he was, no, he was, he was, there had been some vehicle burglaries in my neighborhood.

Let's get them. Post them on Facebook. Blast them out. Oh, they already have. They didn't, but he went to every house after that. He was like, so I don't have to come back. Will you please go check your vehicle and make sure that everything's in there? And when I there, I was like, yeah, everything, everything appears.

I don't leave much in my truck. It's not hunting season. Hunting season, that had been a little bit longer of a list of things to check. But it ain't hunting season. So really all I had in there was a couple cans of snuff. Oh, I shouldn't have that. But anyway, I didn't have much in there. And it was all still there.

So he was like, okay, I just letting you know, y'all be looking because it's happening right through this area. I'm working calls every day. And I said, oh, well, thank you, man. I appreciate it. Let's get them. I said, next time you mind knocking just a little bit softer, though? Like, we.

I said, I got twins in there, man. He said, oh, bless you. I said, no, don't bless me, bless her mom. Yeah, and we just got them asleep. Yeah, they just went down. So my stepbrother has a ring system on his house, not too far from here, and he saw somebody walk up into his garage with a baseball bat, okay? Get up to the door, and he's got an alarm that goes off a motion sensor like the size guy.

And when that alarm went off, that guy's eyes got big, he took off running. But he walked up in there with a baseball bat. You know what they say about baseball bat? baseball bats. They don't stop bullets. They don't stop bullets unless you're a Jedi. This is a strange area to go around like breaking in people's vehicles and houses. Yeah.

Good way to lose your head. I mean, everybody I know has a gun in their pocket. It's certain a good way to get like a sunroof where your baseball cap used to see it. I mean, that's a good place to lose that because, you know, I just don't understand. I go steal a fishing reel. Hey! Get them out of here. You won't get caught.

Bail on that's about $500. Bail on that's three of those fishing reels. There you go. Nice lift. Oh. So they caught the perpetrator? They got him. They did?

Did they catch it? Yeah. Well, I mean, I guess he bailed out. Huh. I didn't know they caught him. He's in the red on that transaction. I'm in the red. He's in the red.

I guess the city's doing all right. They got some money out of them. Allegedly. Allegedly. No, well, they got the bail money. What happened to the real? Oh, he sold it, he claims. Pond it off?

He said he sold it on Facebook. I got one cheap on Facebook about a week ago. Left-handed? Left-handed? There you go. Orange? There you go. I'm just kidding. Just kidding. So the Facebook police got him caught.

Got him. Got him, got. You're going to learn today. It's the world we live in now. You do something. You're facing. Because I knew your neighborhood was getting robbed before you ever told me. Did you?

Yeah, I saw it. The people in our neighborhood were like, look out for these guys. And they're like zooming in on their tattoos on their arms. And I was putting long sleeves on, make sure they knew it wasn't me. Yeah, perhaps maybe I should join one of my neighborhood groups. I think there's about three of them. I mean, I got about 40 houses in there. I don't know how we have that.

You're not part of your neighborhood Facebook group? No. It is one of the most wonderful things in the whole wide world. For real? Yeah, because most of it is people that are about size age saying crazy stuff. that's unusual imagine if sye lived in your neighborhood and had facebook that's a neighborhood facebook page it's wonderful i laugh and i laugh and i laugh laugh is good for the soul see sigh would love watching all that stuff it'd be just like watching pbs live i bet you if we ask

our fans for some good neighborhood watch facebook group stories we'd get some they got some oh oh yeah Some good stuff. Most of them start with an old lady named Glinda. That was actually too bad. I think some of our start. No, Miss Glenda's awesome. She never says anything rude. But some people get straight rude on there.

Is that where Karen come from? Is there a lot of care? Oh, yeah. The neighborhood's griping. Look, I got two new ones in my neighborhood right now. Lock your doors. Uh-oh. Pictures of your neighborhood.

Is it really? The old boy with a tattoo? Uh-huh. Yeah, the cop showed me his picture. Somebody's looking for somebody to weed. eat. Somebody took a picture of an owl. Hey, you got bird watchers. Anybody have a plumber that's reasonable.

Wash your machine repair person. All in the neighborhood. Copperhead snake hiding in these azaleas right here, so now I know which azaleas not to get too close to. There you go. That's on the street. I will bet you a dime. It's not a copperhead. Then there's people talking about fishing in the pond. Uh-oh.

I'll leave that one a lot. Garhole. There you go. The pond fish. Anywhosers, neighborhood Facebook. The videos are great. That was just the last three days of mine. So were there any post regarding last night's events in your neighborhood?

No, they were quiet. Really? Are we allowed to talk about that? Why not? Well, they ain't posting nothing about it. Oh, well, yeah, she said his wedding week. Okay. I saw that.

Yeah, I went to Jeff and Jessica's daughter's rehearsal dinner last night. Oh, did you? No, but I watched it. Right. From my porch. Yeah. I put a tank top on and some jorts and just went and sat in the back of every picture they took. Right.

He was a photo bomb. Did you have your binoculars? It was a photo. I said, Carter, go get the binoculars. I didn't really put binoculars. But I was. Telescope. So we were super excited when we saw, because they had the rehearsal dinner in their

backyard and noise travels really well. Like, I can talk to Jeff and Jessica. If I was just like, raise your voice and yell. We can have a full conversation. And I was like, oh, we are about to sit here. They can't really see us that well so we can kind of lay low. And we're going to rate the speeches that the people give at the rehearsal dinner. and then I'm going to let Jep know who did the best, who did terrible.

And I won't even know who's talking. But they didn't have a microphone, so I couldn't hear. So I was a little sad. I mean, I got really excited for about 30 minutes. Johnny, he sent me a picture. I said, you need to trim them limbs. Hammer, we can't see nothing. I mean, it's having to watch it on the reflection of the water.

Yeah, it was fun, though. I heard laughter a lot. I assume that's when Kay spoke. Students. Somebody gave a speech that got a, a roaring laughter and then applause oh it's probably okay well the only funny person there would be okay i'm sure whoa you there no no so i had a poker game there we go and then i was he couldn't miss i was about to text jeep like hey what's the leftover situation looking like over

there because i assume the food was pretty good and alice it wouldn't let me she's like didn't they know we're watching i'm like we live across the i mean it's not a secret we share a backyard we see, they know if we're having people over too. Yeah. That doesn't mean you sat there and watched, even though you did. I did. I mean. I did.

Just asking about the leftovers, you may have been doing him a favor. Maybe he's got a room in the fridge. Allison, what a party pooper. I bet Jeff's got more than one fridge, though. Could you smell the food? Couldn't smell the food. No, that probably wasn't that good. Nah.

It wasn't that good, yeah. Probably. Yeah, I don't know. I couldn't smell it. And it means it wasn't cooked there, so it was catered. Oh, pretty little. Catering. Probably.

North Louisiana catering. Oh, there's some that are legit. Again, eh? Kimber probably catered it. Oh. Hey, hey, hey. Oh, Alex did. Oh, yeah, I bet it was good.

Alex is great. She can cook. Well, I should have just asked her. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, there you go. Hey, bring the good. Martin told me to go down there and start fishing with my shirt off. I did.

I said, get any kayak and go fishing shirtless. That way you can be. be in the back of every picture. I would have been too. I mean, it was a beautiful picture. Oh, you should have done it.

Probably just the pond. You should have done it. Smoking cigar. Oh. I just rolled up there and socks, socks, and some jorts and nothing else. You'd have thought I was fogging mosquitoes, son. I don't even smoke, but I'd have went down to the store and got me some of the biggest fattest cigars they had.

Oh, all 89 cents and below. They'd had just been a trail behind me everywhere because it's a nice little humid night after that rain passed through yesterday. Hey, it would have stayed right there with you. You could have wrote like love out there and smoke on water. Like, welcome, they're like, welcome, guys. Yeah.

We'll put it on Facebook. See you later. No, I was, we were very respectful. We didn't want, like, Lottie came out at one point and said, what's happened? I was like, shh, kid, people get married. They want to listen to you yell. He's like, is it a birthday party?

I said, no, people get married, shh. You should say, yeah, go. Well, if Carter would have seen it, I was like, don't tell him anything, because he would have been down at the water yelling, what are y'all doing? No. Where's the rhino?

Where's Gus? Where's the Rhinole? I don't know where Gus is. What's Gus doing? So we kept it a secret from the boys because they've been known to just, you know, they pee all in that backyard. You couldn't have that in the backyard.

Oh, that'd have been tight if it had been all three of y'all. A father's son, urination picture. You think it's a nice neighborhood. Then you get there. You're like, no. Out of the canoe with the cigars. Oh, man, that's fantastic. Well, let's take another break.

We'll be back right after this. What are we looking at? You watched PBS last night? Yep. Tell us about it. Did you? Yeah, he'd say he was hitting out. Well, not last night, this weekend.

Last weekend. What was on there? The whole story, and that's H-O-L-E about woodpeckers. Oh, boy. The whole story. There's something like 435 different species of woodpeckers. And it's very, very, very, interesting story.

I do like a woodpecker. They're pretty. They're a cool bird. My dad hated them. Really? Yeah, because we lived in a log house growing up. And there's one little corner that's a chit-ch-ch-ch-tach-tach-tah. Oh, yeah.

They just kept coming to. You know what they're doing when they're doing that? Digging for worms. Nope. They're actually communicating and digging for insects. There you go. They're telling their buddies. Yeah.

Eat it daves. It's a form of... It's pork chop night. Communication. And, you know, then the rest of it is they're digging for ants. What is the one that destroys his houses? Termite. Turmite, yeah.

Woodpeckers. Yeah. No, no, termites. All the kind of insects that live in wood. I don't like to listen to them when I'm squirrel hunting. Do you squirrel hunt a lot? Yeah, I used to. Why?

You don't, yeah, I mean, I know you hunt. Well, he's probably, strike me as a squirrel hunter. Well,

no, he probably, well, like, what we're doing is they're warning the woods and wait for them. They're warning the squirrel,

okay, about the hunter. So if they wanted to warn about Johnny Dee, they'd say, brr-br-br- I said shiny Rolex on his left hand.

Oh, boy, here we go. And a tattoo on his right arm. I would get talking about. And he's got a bidet in his trailer. That's right. And he's got a bidet in a trailer boys.

Boy, you say, if a man goes squirrel hunting and you just get glassed. Very knowledgeable about what's going on. Hey, watching you. In their community. I'm just glad I somehow made it through their unscathed. Everybody.

I feel like we need to sit around and talk about it all this. Sorry, I need it. You squirrel hunt. Yours the squirrel commander. Thank you. Unbelievable. How is your beach vacation?

It was good. It was great. We went fishing. Water in a coffee cup? It's empty. Yeah. But it ain't going to taste like coffee? No.

Oh, it's good. No, it was good. We had all of our family there. My son from London is back in town with us for a couple weeks. And so all of us went, had a great time. We did get to catch some fish. What kind of fish you catch? Speckled trout.

Uh-oh. Speckled trout. I caught one fish that was an oyster fish. Looked that thing up. It's ugly. Does it look like an oyster? Or a fish. Yeah, about in between a fish and an oyster.

You see it? Did you eat it? No. Oh, I do, yeah. You seen one of those before, Sigh? Of course he has. I've seen it. How did you catch that?

Yeah, that's it. That thing's gross. Fishing on the bottom was shrimp. That looked like a bottle. That's it. Where'd you go? We were fishing out of Pensacola. This person says they're tasty.

I called a crab. I caught a crab one time. For real? Yeah, for real. You caught a crab? Yeah, a blue crowd. I was fishing for, you know, I had a shrimp on it. A crab, I've really been.

Was he hooked or was he just holding on? He didn't hold it. Hold it. Wouldn't let go. He said, hey, that was his shrimp. Did you eat him? Nope. That's a lot better story than most of that.

But when I got, when we got back, when we got ready to leave, the guy that was fishing with, he said hey i've got some soft shell crap and i said no i don't oh i remember this time out no no i told you i said stone can cook these well no no no stone's one and said hey yeah give him to us hey he doesn't wrong with a soft shell crap no no i know you eat the whole thing he's good yeah eat the whole thing yeah no i love it oh it's good it's real good stone did a good job cooking that's the only time that i've eaten that and it was great no no i don't like crap you know like they had somebody had king crab one time man he's got too strong of favor

but the soft shell crab he ain't got that bad taste he's excellent soft shell crab po boy yeah oh that's one of the finer things in life oh yeah yeah yeah that's a good that's a good one don't cooked it and it was delicious there it is I don't even know what talked about I thought we's going to get a little more info on woodpeckers be honest with you.

Well, I was hoping. I like the woodpeckers. Well, on that. Here's a question for you. Where do all the insects go in the wintertime? Where have all the insects? Because, you know, everything seems to disappear. Well, they're kind of like the bear.

They actually go into hibernation and are dominant. Is that the right word? Dormant. Dormant. I prefer dominant. No, no. But a dominant insect I'm harassing this place

They're actually asleep You know During wintertime Until it warms up You know Until the woodpecker's dig about the wood There you go That's what they do

Like little scoops of ice cream For the woodpecker A little cold bug That's gross When was the last time you saw a woodpecker Huh? In person Oh no I see them all the time

I see them I got a I got a pair of meanest mokkenbirds you ever met in your life right now in my front yard. Oh, no, no. I've had mokinbirds when they're nested. Oh, yeah. Oh, they'll dive bomb you. The little ones just fledged, left the nest, and they are, you walk outside.

You're getting hit in the back by a malkingbird. No, no, yeah. Oh, they're. 100%. They hit you? Oh, yeah, they'll hit you. I take a time. And I'll bomb you and bounce off your head.

The first one the other morning whenever she got me, I'm assuming it's a bomb me, because the daddy probably don't care that much. Yeah. I'm just guessing. Yeah, that's guess. And she hit me. I was going to get a package from the front door, and she hit me kind of like right between the shoulder blades.

And I about crap down both legs. Because I didn't even know she was there. She come in quiet. And then I looked, and she just standing there on the ground bowed up at me like that ostrich. And I was like, now, hold on now. I ain't scared of you. You ain't looking at eye to eye like that ostrich was.

You can beat that with a tennis room. And then I looked down, and I saw one of the little ones about that big, right about my kneecap in the bush and I said oh no mind girl you're fine you just doing what you do i can appreciate that i live with one like you right now i get it like i live with a protective mama so i i got you we got about three nests of of martins and they are bad no no no other day i come walking out the big nests and it looked five of them we crap everywhere yeah five of them was just lined up they were so funny looking under your patio oh On the front porch.

Hey, I've walked out of there before, and I've been attacked. I had to take my hat off and cover my eyes. I thought they were going to go for my eyes. Oh, they fly through there all the time. They're horrible. You're out sitting on the back porch. Tennis racket. You just look, you just.

Oh, let them be. They out there eating skaters. Oh, yeah. Let them do their thing. They keep up coming to me, though. They eat a tub. We had a terrible moment this weekend, though. This is all just reminded me.

Carter found an egg in the driveway of some small bird. I don't know what it is. I can tell you what it is. Dove. I don't know. He got a concrete driveway. Probably a dove. It was small and speckled.

At least the part that I could figure out. He was bringing it to show me. It was killed. And then he dropped it. And then he was like, all the birds hate me. I'm out.

He's like, all the birds are out of me. We need to send him a letter. And I was like, no, but it happens like that when it had fallen out of a nest. They probably already had grieved it. But, oh, man, it took a while to talk about. He shook up. Oh, he just felt like he.

Was it white and speckled or? It was hard to say. Kind of cream colored. Cream colored and speckled. Very yellow yolk. Didn't even get to eat it. No. It was a bad thing.

You should have told him with that like there. There's no blood in it. It wasn't fertilized anyway. So that's fine. You could like a chicken egg. Anyway, there was no coming. We just went swimming. Yeah.

Distraction. Yeah, let's get out of here. Yeah, that's the worst thing you do is when you get ready to have fried eggs, and you crack it, and then it's like you said, it's just about a high-formed chicken in there. Has that happened to you? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah?

Yeah. Is that happen to you? Yeah. You ain't ever had busted an egg that's been fertilized? Yeah, that's when you farm fresh people didn't realize a rooster done got in there with their hands. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then that egg went a couple of, extra days before being fount.

That's it. And the hen had been sitting on it. And you crack it open and there's a little beak looking at you. That's bad deal. Oh, yeah. Well, we used to just stick it anyway. But if it does, my life will never eat egg again. If you have chickens and raise them.

Oh, yeah. That'll happen quite often. Especially if you've got an overzealous rooster. Yeah. Or you get to yoke and it's like bloody. Yeah. That happens, man. What do you think?

All of them just come. I mean, like. I know. I just thought there was a way to. sit on him long enough a chicken will come from we just get them before they get to that point but some of them get some of them get lost in translation and don't get guided i've just never considered the thought of crack into the pan uh-oh this is a half bird yeah you can generally tell when you go to crack it it's got a little bit different sound you're like hmm yeah it doesn't sound like a

thud yeah kind of that's gross but it happens what have you hard-boiled that one oh that be a bad deal. That would be bad. Oh, that would be a bad. Then you put it on Fear Factor. Oh, that would be bad. Good grief. That would be a rough way.

That's enough, Joe Rogan. Anyway, let's take our last break. We'll be back right now. Oh, boy. A group of owls, that's called a parliament. How do you know all of that? I don't know. It just came to me.

When you said Rhino, I was thinking a group of Lens is called a crash. So the owls are political. Why did we not go further? Parlor. How do you know that? He's right. Hey. What about Crohn's?

Murder. They're political. He got that one right. So you just know what a group of every animal is? Well, no. What's a group of Rano? Crash. He's right.

A what? A crash. What did you say? A group of cats was called? Cats, I think, is called a clowder. How do you know this? Is that right? Hold on.

Sorry, we were going to do emails, but this is way. Oh, no. This is fantastic. What's a group of dolphins called? I think it'd be a pod. I don't know. I don't know. A pod.

Yep. But like, PBS talking with that. Group of manatees. I've got a, I've got to try and stumping. No, I don't know. I've got no idea.

I've seen that episode, but I can't remember the name. Manateaus are cool. Oh, a group of frogs is called. Of course. An army. Oh, is it?

Yeah. Now, Manatees are an aggregation of manitutes. Oh, that's a good one. What's a chorus then? Oh, turtles. You know what a group of turtles is called? A bell.

A bell? Ninjas. Nensis. Depends on the group. I got to know what. A B.A. L.E. What's a chorus then?

I thought it was a chorus of frogs. It may also be. That's just when they're at night. When they're singing. They're singing. When they're calling. Oh, what's a little bitty frog in the wintertime army? Those are called baby frogs.

No, no, they're not baby. I'm going to need more. No, well, all I know is that they're... Post tadpoles. That may be them right there. That's just a group of frogs. Well, there's a... Let there are thousands of them on dogbary.

Quick. When we start... What's a group of? And they're singers. Uh, not. Is that right? Holy cow. What did you ask you take a quiz on this at some point?

I just learned in school. No, he didn't. What school did that? What? Somebody had been busy on Google. That's not true. How do you know? I don't know.

You came in loaded for this today. You've never once talked about groups of animals still today. Well, he brought it up. In your morning poop today, you said, you know what? Negative. All right there, squirrel commander. Okay. What's a group of squirrels called?

Dre. Come in. See? A one of them. A dray? A dray? The fact that I got man. The advantage he passed them makes me at least feel a little better about it.

I don't know. I'm lucky. What's a group of... That one's easy. I know. I'm just trying to think of something. I wanted to do dogs. I want to go with something that's so obvious.

Oh. Group of giraffes. Tower. That seems right. Yep. No, that is right. It's also not... I'm going to walk that back.

Correct. Thank you. It said heard, but there's a word. but okay we got gorillas can I phone a friend no

oh you've been hanging out with somebody that knows all this no I don't I just gorillas I don't know what a gorilla is

well a group of guerrillas is called I would ask Martin what about hippopotamai um hold on hippopotamus let me just think

for a second or hyenas uh uh uh this is interesting this might never make it but I love them I don't know

Lyons are Group of lions Well that one's easy Well I know I had to check and say If Hunter was texting him or something Yeah Hands free over here

All right Guerrillas are a band Hippopotamus Or a cackle Now you know The more you know Anyway emails Hello at duckcallroom.com

I don't know how we got To where we just got But we got there We always do. If you ever wonder what we do in the breaks, that was pretty much just a break. Somebody starts talking, then we quiz them on it. Chris emails in. Where's Chris from?

Doesn't say. Doesn't say. Big fan. He don't want you to know. Anyway, his girlfriend and I are planning on getting married, and he's recently starting shopping for engagement rings. Here's the thing, though. They've only been dating seven months.

Though we've known each other much longer than that. that we both have always believed when you know you know and they both feel like they know everybody's supporting them um there might be a future father-in-law's a little more apprehensive but they do support them um how how do we think they should go about things they're married to the idea of getting married this year hope in October do we think that's a good idea do they have the resources to do I don't know. I mean, we don't have a lot of information. Yeah, I'm confused.

I'm confused, too. Yeah, do it. Yeah, just do it, man. Figure it out later. I'm for it. Great plan. So what do you think? I say do it.

You'll figure it out. No fart. Combine your money. Yeah. You make more money. If you don't have the resources to be single, you might have a resource to be married. You sleep in the same bed.

All you need is a one-bedroom apartment. instead of two one-bedroom apartments. Boom. They just saved you money. Dave Ramsey style. I'll say go for it. It doesn't seem like he's the kind of guy for renting. Buy you something small.

There you go. Tiny house. No. I will keep my opinions of tiny homes to myself. Mobile home. That's fine. That's not a tiny home. That's just a home you can get from place to place

if the opportunity arises. A tiny home That's dumb That might be because I'm 6-2 But I've never seen A tiny home Yeah me and Alice can do that That's a little red wagon

Tiny home Oh man We're struggling What else we got? I ain't got nothing Oh here we go I'm just kidding He's just kidding

Hello J.D Uncle Sy and Martin and other guests. Ola. Others. Whether it be Godwin Stone, Philip, or Robertson. You're in luck. It's Philip. Seth, from British Columbia.

Yeah, okay. Which is Kanata, not South America. He's from Kanata, but he had a thing. I'm just here to prove that we're making big differences, Martin. He listens to show as well. doesn't but he tells her all the things that we talk about and apparently his wife surprised him with a pedicure and so he had to go. I was hoping she body slammed him. Hey I'm like Martin. I like playful. I don't think Martin's into that. I think that was goblin. Oh, I'm not into getting body slam.

I ain't saying I wouldn't. All right. Don't knock it till you try. Si. If Brittany go to body slam me, we're in a bind. If Christine Bodies and we're going to hit the hospital. Trust me. Anyways, we got dudes in Canada getting pedicures now, and he loved it. Hey, that's not terrible. It was terrible. It's a good adventure.

That's a thing to do with you want. Are your toes still painting? No. Thank God. That was weird. It was weird that you went with colors. Mardi Gras. You got to.

What'd you just say? My feet were so pretty when I had my toes painted. It is wild. I had them the body-graw. It is wild out of all of us. The Mardi Gras colors. His feet were in the best shape pre-pedicure than any of ours. So I takes care of his feet.

That's because he's taking a nap every day for the last 72 years. He's on his feet less than anybody else. You got it, baby. It just thumbed up. Hey, I ain't going to miss my mouth. You nailed him. Nothing can make me miss my nap. Have you taken a nap today?

Of course. Absolutely. You didn't see him when he walked in today? He had that glazed overlooking his eyes like, man, I may have been swerving on the way. Wait a minute. Did I see something about yipes on there? Yipes. Oh, I got a ton of yipes stories.

We had one nurse here. You want to hear this one? Caitlin was an RN for six years. Gave thousands of them belly shots. for people, those were the worst. Oh, they are. So, Caitlin, I'm kind of mad at you right now.

Because when I was in the hospital, they'd come at 2 o'clock and wake you up and be like, here you go, piao! And you know, hurt. Paya. I was like, just let me die before you do this again. That's what they've done to me in Houston. Anyway, yeah, right there in the belly. Oh, yeah.

They're like, hey, got a little belly fat and they squeeze it and pia out. It sucks. Your belly's tender. Yeah, it's tender. Okay. Well, yeah. Mine grows and shrinks and grows and shrinks. It's a very tender spot. want.

Anyway, she got a case of the yips. So every time she did the shot, she'd be like, all right, ready, one, two, three, p'all, right? Well, then she got the yips and couldn't do it on three, and she kept going all the way to seven. Uh-oh. Good grief. A seven count? So three's coming in gone. Can you do the first five in your head?

Like, can you count? Yeah. If I'm the patient, she's all, you're ready. One, two, three. Yeah, if you say three, four. Four, five, six, seven. One, three, four, five, five. Seven.

Yeah. So she felt terrible about the patients because she'd be there, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Yeah, that just seems mean. Well, it was the yips. I know, but as a patient, that seems like torture. Yeah, don't tell them it's on three when it's on seven. Tell them it's on ten. Just don't count out loud.

Hit them with seven. That's your advice to you there, baby. Well, she's done with it now. No, she, yeah. It only lasts a few weeks. Okay. count to yourself six years in two no way i won't know six years in all of a sudden she she got she can go on three couldn't go on three she can go on three i do everything on one

one just do it it's easier one two and three is just time to get nervous that's like that's like fell out feel shooty well i do it on three but i don't ever say three you just one two yeah you keep trigger pose yeah you keep the same spacing one one two boom boom boom no one, boom. Well, that's because you're greedy. I'm after, we're out here trying to be a team. Instant gratification. One, two, boom.

There you go. What else you got? Nothing? Three, four, five, six. A Bible verse? I don't even really have that. Bible verse of the day. It was a really weird morning.

I didn't have time. How are we going to win the Clove Awards if you don't have us a Bible verse? It's the Caleb Award. Well, then they need to do a hyphen better because it looks like clove on their pamphlet. I did congratulations to Phil I'm winning the club award That was awesome Did y'all hear jace's speech?

I thought it was tremendous Yeah, Al told us all about it It is for real I heard jace wouldn't be quiet Yeah Yeah I'm confused That was what his dad said

Not me Oh okay If we could ever get jace to shut up If Phil said that That's what he said That's what Al said That's what Al said That's what Al

Not that Al would embellish That was right. No. It was really good. Well, good. We're going to go real standard here. What's your guy? Let's just go with Galatians 5.

The fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control against these things, there is no longer. Hey, that's our challenge to you today. Hey, if you've got issues that you need to get rid of, that's what you do. You pick the issue you want to get rid of like anger. and change it with something like the fruit of the spirit got like peace peace boom right there you go one two boom we're out we're gone see you next see you guys later i don't know we're doing