Dumb Blonde - Ask, Tell, Confess: Bunnie's New Beefy Boys

Episode Date: January 17, 2025

Bunnie's in her farmer era and shares all about her and Jelly's new hoofed bundles of joy, including some cute, sassy cows and a donkey. The gals chat about how hot farmers are, Bunnie daydreams about Jelly in overalls, and then they take a caller confession featuring a tire-slashing revenge moment on a cheating ex. Watch Full Episodes & More:www.dumbblondeunrated.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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We have more shows that we're adding. And not to mention we have the visuals of the podcast. Head over to www.patreon.com backslash dumb blonde podcast and sign up. Ask tell conf, confess. Hello fri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i- Hello friends. Welcome to Astro Comparison. I did a short one for all the people at home who get upset whenever I fucking forever in their ear. Staccato.

Hi guys. Happy fucking new year bitches. Ooh, it is the new year. We're one week in of the new year. So this is gonna come out when in like a day or two. Yeah. I've ended up with cows. I somehow have, I'm a fucking cow farmer now.

And I ended up with a cow. Yeah, I did not. For everyone asking, Haley does not have a cow. No. Okay. And you not only are a cow mom, donkey. We've got a donkey. We call them donk. Oh, I love donk.

Donk the donk. Well, I call them donk. Jay calls them donkey. He is so excited. I can't believe that video ended up getting 14 million views. That's damn crazy. Who knew farm content got so many views? I'm going to be out there with the cows every fucking day.

The donkey's here? Daddy, your donkey's here. I'm going to leave it until I see it. What's my hair look? Ravishing. First impressions last a lifetime. It's my first time seeing donkeys. Do you have any words before you meet your donkey?

I'm excited. The donkey's going to love me. We're friends forever. Do you want to send him a message? To your future donkey, I loved you from day one. There's no way he's standing up right now. He's standing up baby. No, no, I'm telling you, he's laying down. No, he's standing up. That donkey's not that small.

He's that small. Oh, this is the best donkey ever. Oh my god. He's standing up. What's up, donkey? Donkey, donkey, donkey. Hi baby. Come on, donkey. Oh, look at that. Oh, he's a little show donkey. Look at him, he's shriveling. Oh my gosh, he's so cute! Look I got some grass for your donkey. You can have my grass donkey, it's our grass now. I'm worried he's a wild donkey. Look they're struggling, I mean he's a stubborn fucker. They're struggling to get him in the fence. I like the donkeys. Look at him. I can't believe he's that small. Oh I love the little donkey.

Look at his little white nose. I can't believe he's that small. Oh, I love the little dog. There's a white nose. People say I exploit I exploit the kids, man. I'm going to exploit the fuck out of these cows. Can't wait. I'm just going to be like out there. You guys are going to be like, OK, does she ever not hang out with the cows? Yeah, no. Both of our pages right now are just cows.

Yeah. Cow and donkey. No, but yeah, that was a what happened was it kind of fell into our lap. And in a way, I just want to let people know everybody's like you guys should have rescued you should have done this. In a way, we kind of did rescue. Of course, we paid for the cows. But at the same time, these cows were going to get split up, or they were going to go to separate homes. So what we did is we just went in got all three three of them and let's tell the story because we can insert the footage.

Now I didn't want to post it because I didn't want people to be like, what a bitch, you know? Um, but at first I think what happened. So when Mimi had found these cows, she's like, these three, um, are being sold for X amount of dollars. And I was like, okay, cool. So I immediately hit Jason and Jason and I had been looking for a cow for you and Kayla anyways So we had already been I had no idea guys. Yeah

They were just getting I knew that Kayla was getting I would never just get Kayla a cow and not get you one Would have let me But anyways, honestly, I got to get shout out, Blizzard Blake, Kayla's husband. It was really his idea. And I just fucking took it over like I do with everything. That's why I know they don't ever let me get involved in shit because I'm like, oh, my idea. Okay, cool.

But he let me fucking do the whole thing. So anyways, we were at me, Blake and Jason were literally sending each other cows, this cows, that cows out. And then Mimi was sending us cows. Well, Mimi sent me the three and I was like, Oh my God, it's perfect. There's a white one. There's a brown one. And then there's a fucking black one. Emo tonight will be the night, you know? So it was perfect. And I was just like, okay, cool. We'll get, we'll take these two. Cause immediately Blake was like,

Kayla's going to want either the brown one or the white one. And I was like, I'll either want the brown one or the white one. And then Mimi, our little goth fucking duckling gets the goth one. Yeah. We get there and the goth one is a little bit bigger than the rest of them. A little. It's twice the size of the other two. He actually looks like a lightweight buffalo. I call him buffalo often. Yes. He looks like a little buffalo so but he has the best personality out of all three of them. Like he is so sweet. Very outgoing.

So, you know, we surprised buggy and I'm like, okay, buggy, which one do you want? But he's like, I want the white one. And then I looked over at Mimi and I was like, and that one's yours, you know, and Mimi was like, no. And me and Jason both go, we look at each other and she's like, no, no. Grateful. I promise. I don't know. She didn't mean it on green. She was sizing him up. Like, do we have room for this guy? Cause he's a big dude. I have one acre. No, like when you meet him, you guys, he's big. He broke my toe. Like he's a big guy. Yeah. And he's's and he's an Aries. So he literally like, is that how he walks? Literally,

his head movement. Like he's always moving his head and like bucking and just like, he's he's a fucking a baby boy. Oh, he knows. Yeah. So maybe he was like, I know. And I was like, Are you sure? And she's like, No, and I was like, All right, well, and the dude was like, I can't split them up. And I was like, I felt really bad. Because I didn't want to be like, are you sure? And she's like, no, mm-mm. And I was like, all right, well. And the dude was like, I can't split them up. And I was like, I felt really bad because I didn't want to be like, okay, I'll take these two and you stay, you know,

like be the fucking outcast of the crew. So I was like, fuck it, I'll take all three of them. So we get them home and, you know, Jason texts me, he's like, I did not see it going that way. And I was like, yeah, me either. But I didn't care because, you know, it's like, whatever, everything happens for a reason. Let's also say I don't do good with last minute changes. Right. So you can't surprise me. This is why I don't do good with surprises, because I already I need to evaluate everything

and I panic. Yeah. So they had gone to go look at like other other cows or whatever. And I was just coping with the fact that I have three fucking cows now. And, you know, I went out there to feed them the next day and fucking, he's just was such a big dude that he just like bullies his way through. And like the other two are so much smaller than him. And fucking S'more is so docile and so sweet. Oh, he's just like, he is buggy. If Bug was a fucking Highland cow, that is fucking Bug. And he is so bonded to Bug, he goes up to her

and just lays his head on her and like snuggles on her. Like he loves her. Crunch is all me, baby. I fucking love Crunch. Crunch don't give a fuck about nobody. He's got an attitude problem. And he's just like, dude, if you're not feeding me, bye. You know, like he does not care.

But he, but he loves me now because I'll go out there and I'll be like, hi, crunch, crunch. And he, look, he gets really jealous. He gets really jealous. It's I gotta watch another animal. Yes. I gotta watch what I say whenever I'm around Chachi because he gets to hold him down as they were being unloaded and he had a full panic. Yeah.

No pan over to say the saying Chachi's having a breakdown. I said me the funniest part of the whole video. He was he was. And so I just was like, I felt bad because one, we have them in a smaller pen right now. I know he's pissed. He's looking for crunch. You can't say crunch his name around him. He gets really fucking just defensive. It's OK, baby.

Why is the heat on fucking hell? The door's normally open. Can you open the door right there? Good Lord. He's literally like rolling his eyes right now. No, he gets so mad. If I say it again, he'll get up and run around. Do you want me to do it?

Please. Crunch, crunch. I love you, Crunchy. Crunchy. Oh my goodness, Crunch, Crunchy. Crunchy. Oh my goodness, Crunch Crunch. He's like, where? Where is the son of a bitch? He's so jealous of his new cow brother.

It's unreal, dude. Like he, it's okay, it's okay. I love you. Crunchy's not here. He's not here. You guys, there is no better time than to manifest a new business Than the new year start this year off being your own boss being an entrepreneur doing whatever your little heart desires

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So anyways, long story short, fucking Brownie. His name went from Milk Dud to Brownie cause I hated the Milk Dud and who's now Pablo Escobar. Fucking Brownie was headbutting S'more. And I was just, and you heard it. It was like, like it lights were on and nobody's home. And S'more does not have a big brain. It echoed. Okay.

It was like a hallway. It was really bad. And I felt so bad for him. I even have a big brain. It echoed, OK? It was like a hallway. It was really bad. And I felt so bad for him. I even have it on video. I'm like, Brownie, you just fucking headbutted the shit out of your brother. And so Jay, my husband, came to me. And said that he was really upset because everybody else in the family got a farm animal and he didn't get one.

And I looked at him and I was like, are you really upset? And he's like, yeah. And I was like, what do you want? He's like, I want a donkey. And I was like, just like that. I was like, okay. So somehow I think, was it you that found the donkey? I had gone out to the farm that night

when we dropped off the cows and we went to this farm up the like about an hour away from our house and they had a donkey there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So they happen to have a fucking mini donkey. That was like, I think it's like four years old, right? Yeah, they had a mini donkey there named Grizz. So I was like, OK, bring them on, bring them on. So we get we have all four of the animals in there.

And while they were there, I was just like, okay, bring them on, bring them on. So we get, we have all four of the animals in there. And while they were there, I was just like, Mimi had decided to, I had texted Mimi that morning and I was like, I think we're gonna have to get rid of Brownie cause he's way too aggressive. Hoping that was me like throwing the hook out there, hoping that she would be like, we'll take them. And it actually did work out because Mimi was like,

okay, I've had time to think about it. And she's like, I really want them. And I was like, oh my God, this is perfect. I text Jason. I'm like, she wants, OK, I've had time to think about it. And she's like, I really want him. And I was like, oh, my God, this is perfect. I text Jason. I'm like, she wants. Well, Jason was texting me saying, I don't care if she gets mad at me. Just bring the fucking cow over here. It's what he's like. He's like, she's either going to get mad at me or she's going to fucking be happy.

He's like, so either way, if she if she flips out when the cow gets here, we'll just figure something out. He's like, but I really think that she's going to fall in love with this cow. And then Mimi had text me and said, OK, we want the cow gets here, we'll just figure something out. He's like, but I really think that she's gonna fall in love with this cow. And then Mimi had texted me and said, okay, we want the cow. So I hit Jason, I was like, she knows that she wants the cow. And he's like, that's fucking great.

So we load up the cow, okay? And this is the sad part. We load up Brownie, we say goodbye. He starts crying because he's so bonded to S'more and Crunch and crunch is like, like crying over the thing. He's crying. I mean, it was not. Bailey starts crying. Like it was a whole scene in our fucking front yard, but I was like, you know what? They're fucking cousins. Like, yeah.

And he's going to an amazing home so Mimi gets Pobleto and he hasn't stopped crying no I tried to break into my house um so we understand that they're herd animals we are working very digitally like diligently diligently I want to say digitally uh To find him a friend, but again, I wasn't prepared to bring home this large of an animal. So we have to build him a pin. He's now in Opie's run right now, destroying it by the way. And we have to literally bring someone out to build him a pin and an overhang. We weren't prepared. I thought I would have something small that could go into the garage. And like he couldn't even fit through a doorway if he wanted to with his horns. Like he's ginormous.

So we are doing our best to accommodate him first so that when we do bring him in a friend, but right now he's upset because he doesn't have a friend. But he loves Zach Top. He loves Zach Top. He bonded to me. So he tries to come in my bedroom window at night. And so he broke my screen open. He got his head stuck in the fence.

But if I play him, Zach Top, he just really just chills out. So we found that out on my life as a joke. I'm fucking Beethoven, though. I'll try that. I heard he I heard cows love classical music. I'm going to have to try it because it's a frequency in it. Maybe I don't know. There's a frequency in classical music, apparently, that have to try it because it's But it has a frequency in it. Maybe. I don't know. Is there's a frequency in classical music

apparently that's completely different from other music. Facts. He's gonna go have a play date though. So he's on his way to a play date with the horses that Olivia rides. Oh God, is he gonna fucking buck them though? He's, he's I mean, it's like a, they all have their stalls and stuff

and he'll go out into the big run and there's a them there. You're gonna pick them up in trailer. Okay. Now I'm putting the back of my car. But he's a big boy. He doesn't even look that big on camera. You get him in person and he's lightweight intimidating. Yeah, no, like Jason's actually so I found out Jason scared. Okay, stop. I'm very confidently like loving on him. If you're assertive with him, he'll listen. Oh, I know. Like he got into my chicken feed and it's really bad for cows. So I literally had to grab him by the tail and the horn

and like eat him out of there because they've got so many metals in chicken food, it could hurt the cow. So I had to get him out of there. Well, as that was all going down, we were like, okay, we'll go back in your pen for right now. We'll clean up the chicken feed. You can come back out into the large run.

And I got a little too confident with him and he got pissed and stepped back and like full force stepped on my pinky toe. So I got a broken toe right now, right at the knuckle. It sucks. But if saving more and spending less is one of your top goals for 2025, why are you still paying insane amounts of money every month for your wireless? Switching to Mint Mobile is the easiest way to save this year. As the first company to sell premium wireless service online only, Mint Mobile lets you maximize your savings with plans starting at $15 a month when you purchase a three-month plan. Listen guys,

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You want a blue collar man so bad. Dude, can we please do it? You guys, should we put Haley on FarmersOnly.com? Let's video the whole thing. Yeah, we'll swipe together. Oh, we're doing it today, baby. It's happening after this. Today. Get your picture, little get your picture.

What's your profile picture going to be on farmers only? We'll go get a picture of you with the cows. OK, just like you and crunch. Yeah, crunch loves to be asking me questions about cows. I know nothing. Just be like, I don't know. I just these are my friends cows. I just thought I needed it to be on this fucking website. It was a photo shoot.

Every picture is like different cows. Farmers make money. One of my sugar daddies was a watermelon farmer. Nice. Bro was loaded. We're gonna start a farm. That's my next venture. Yeah. I love a farmer.

So are we. Our next adventure is pigs. Yeah. I grew up on a farm. I'd like another. Yeah. It's time for you, Haley. It's time to settle down on the farm. Well, we got it. We got it. She had a hard time moving this last time she's finally adjusted to her place. So maybe. Yeah.

So maybe we let her stay there for a couple of years and then we move her. Yeah. Haley doesn't do good with moves. No, we just have to get a boyfriend who lives on a farm so you can go visit. Yeah. Like start getting. Would you date a big old fucking corn fed booty? I, when I picture farmers,

I picture just big old fucking rumps. Do you? Yeah. I don't think they're their ass. In my farmer fantasy, yes. That's what's happening. Just big old, just wearing overalls and just big old fucking,

like my husband, just, oh, when Jay wears overalls, it will suck him off in a heartbeat. Yeah. What's going on? What? Always, always good. You know what I was just thinking that we made it through and asked how confess without anything sexual

or disgusting. You brought it up. I listen. You always bring up the butts. Listen, all I think about is my husband and fucking overalls, he looks so hot. I will say the coolest thing is watching my husband turn into a farmer. I'm like, put that vest on, you look hot in a vest.

Like he got these car heart looking vest now to put over his hoodies when he goes out. Give me some for Jay. I will. Or show me where to get them. Yeah, no, he just literally, he's obsessed. He got one and he was like, how do I look? And I was like, I actually really liked the vest on him. I always clown people. Would you suck them off with just the vest? Yes, I would. I would. He's going to be editing this and he's going to come downstairs and he has to have the boots on. So only boots

and the vest with a piece of straw hanging. Yeah. Give it to me. And Jay said, I'm painting a fantasy for you right now. That's so funny. Yeah. That's good. What's going to happen, but yeah. I'll get, I'll get the best.

And then the cow will be in the beacon and watching you guys in the shower. He does. She said she'll look out the window and he's just. I will take a picture of you guys. If I have to close all my blinds in the back of the house. Cause he's just staying. I will take a picture you guys. If I have to close all my blinds in the back of the house because he's like this.

He wants to know what you're doing. He wants to and if I start walking inside I can hear him behind me. He's chasing after me as I go towards the back door and then he gets up there and he gets to it because he doesn't like to get on the concrete and he just puts one foot on the concrete and looks at me and I'm like, go away. And he's just, I love that you guys are getting to bond though, because Oh, he's an Aries. And so Jason's an Aries.

Mimi is a tourist, but she's got fucking a Aries stellium. I think she has like six planets and stand. And his name's Crunch. Yeah. Oh. Yeah. Shit. Crunchy muffin. Isn't that weird? Did you notice that?

Lipo used to be such a bad word, but we are also supposed to act like we love every part of our bodies. It's BS. I know that especially after 40, it is so hard to keep your body in shape. I mean, I work out three to four times a week, eat right, have no joy in life, and it's all because of genetics. So getting your body back is so hard. I get it.

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So I've got croach and crunch. I say it all the time. That's why Chachi's really jealous too, because he hears the, you know, close. So you're giving that one look. You calling this dog my name? Like he hates it. Yeah, but he's better now. Loof.

Well, in our Ask, Tell, Confess, we have now set up for you guys to be able to call in and tell us your Ask, Tell, Confesses. You can text it or you can call it. Yeah, this happened without my knowledge, so I love it. We talked about it. I forgot. I didn't know we were starting it yet.

Should we give the number out so people can call it? Only on Patreon. You can go to the Patreon to get the number and you can text it or you can call it. Any love, any tear on Patreon? Yep, Yep. As long as you're a Patreon, you can be a part of our, our call-ins. So we, we got a lot, there was a lot to go through, so we're not going to play all of them, but let's find a good one. We've got time for one today and then the next episode we'll do more.

All right. Let's see. Hi, baby. Can you hear that? My name's Nicole. Like 10 years ago or so, I found out my then boyfriend was cheating on me with a much younger girl. And I had been begging to go to the fair and he kept telling me like, oh no, I don't feel like it. He kept putting it off well ended up finding out somehow that he took this girl to the fair that I had been begging to go to after the stem of the fair I didn't like obviously didn't know he was there but he invited me to his house

that night to spend the night with him. But then I just couldn't find his phone anywhere. He had his phone hidden between the bed, like it's a mattress and the wall, which was so weird, so not like him. I went on his phone, found all the messages from this girl, blah, blah, blah. The next day, he turned it around. It was all my fault that he did this to me.

So I ended up finding out where his car was parked, his truck. I blasted Carrie underwood before he sheets all the way to his truck. Needless to say, I splashed a hole and all four tires. Maybe next time he'll think before he freaking cheats. Okay. I'm not completely proud of what I did, but at the same time he deserved it. So that's my story. I love you guys.

Yeah, we love her. What was her name? Nicole. Nicole. Yeah, we love her. What was her name? Nicole. Nicole. Listen, man. I don't condone violence, but I had to think of what I was going to put this. I don't condone violence anymore in my old age, but listen, I've done some fucked up shit to do.

It's I've caught cheating like with one of them. One of the milder ones that I can't fucking be that I can talk about would be The I had an ex named Clint who was cheating on me and I was like in love with this dude And he's like freckles like red hair like dude, but he was like he was like so dope and like he was like Like one of the coolest dudes and he was in a gang and like, you know, he was like so dope and like, he was like, um, like one of the coolest dudes and he was in a gang and like, you know, he was just super alpha. He's a Sagittarius. Go figure. I ended up marrying a Sagittarius.

What? Not the ginger in the game. But he used to fight like a motherfucker. The dude was crazy. And I think that's what I'm attracted to. So anyways, he was cheating on me and I caught him at his baby mama's house and his car was parked outside. So Tasha was with me. And I think it was me, Tasha and my girl Stacey. And we went to the store and bought like,

it had to have been like three of those, you know, double stacked egg things. You know what I'm talking about? That has all the eggs in them. Yeah, the flats. Just the big old flats of eggs. And we went back to his house, or to her, the baby mama's house.

And I'm talking like just pelted his fucking car with every one of these eggs, dude. And this is in Vegas. Vegas, heat, shit dries on your car. Like you don't catch it, right? So I mean, we're, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop. He must've thought it was gunshots because it was literally just so many

eggs, but it's three girls just fucking going at it, dude. We fucking take off, dude. We get to one of the lights up by the Mormon temple in Vegas and fucking all of a sudden we're sitting at the light and we see his car pull up to the light with fucking eggs covering this car. I mean, the shit was still dripping off of it. And he's just looking in every direction to see who egged his fucking car.

Did he see you? No, never got caught. What? I told him later on, but yeah. He pulled up next to you and didn't see you. He was across, so we were making a left and he was right here. So, yeah. Oh my God.

I'm so glad we didn't get caught in that moment though, cause he would have probably lost his shit. But and he was mad when I told him later on like, hey, you remember when your car got egged? It was me. You told him, of course, that is too good of a story to not ever claim. What are you talking about? It's been since like probably a couple of months. It was probably. Oh, oh, I'm still mad.

I thought you made this was like years later. No, no, no. I told him a couple of months later. I was like, oh, by the way, I, that was me. yeah, there's a few other things, but saying that much, Nicole. I mean, listen, I didn't see anything. These dudes, I didn't hear a single word you said. Yeah, don't start. None won't be none. Yeah. My slogan.

So I mean, we love you. Our fellow violent baddie. At least it wasn't him. She fucking slashed, you know? So it's like, yeah, it could have been worse. Could have been way worse. You could have been accomplices to murders right now. Tires can be replaced, but anybody that's listening to this,

do not go and slash anybody's fucking tires because we think it's okay. Please don't. We don't think it's okay. We just mean that like, you know, we understand in that moment that you were filled with rage. Yeah. And I'm pretty sure insurance only covers it when it's all four.

So I'll need you three. Yeah, always always or put sugar in it or put sugar in the gas tank. That always helps. What does that do? Fucks up your entire car completely? Sugar in the gas tank. Sugar in the gas tank, baby. Yeah. Or the vents that are in the front.

I can see the headline now. Bunny XO teaches young girls how to fucking fuck their significant other's cars up. Yeah. It's pretty, the vents that are at the bottom of the front windshield. Yeah. Poor piss in there. Whole car will smell like piss every time the AC on all right thank you guys for listening to another us I'll confess bye bye