Dumb Blonde - Ask, Tell, Confess: Getting Whacked Off By Grandma

Episode Date: December 6, 2024

Welcome to a very spicy week of Ask, Tell, Confess! First, a confession from a listener whose recent bedroom activities left her with a bad taste in her mouth. Then, a crazy story about a grandma getting handsy, Bunnie drops some financial wisdom, and the gals talk about their favorite toys they've used to achieve total euphoria.Watch Full Episodes & More:www.dumbblondeunrated.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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I want to know why in the hell are you not on Patreon? I don't think you guys even realize how much content we have on Patreon. Let me break it down for you. We have the BunnyXO show. We have Meet the D-Fords. We have Popaganda. We have more shows that we're adding. And not to mention, we have the visuals of the podcast.

Head over to www.patreon.com backslash dumb blonde podcast and sign up. Ask, tell, confess. Ask, tell, confess. Ask, tell, confess. Ask, tell, confess. Hello. hello oh is that a good one me off that was a good one wow the switch up i went a little bit i had my fingers ready a little bit higher a little bit higher octave too a little staccato is that what it's called look at hayley with the big words i was in band i love that staccato is that what it's called when it goes a little higher

but no when you just like oh cut it off oh you stick it to a staccato yeah i feel like the italians always make everything so much more difficult staccato you know instead of just stick well fancy seeing you guys here oh man it's been a while guys yeah it's been a good like 12 hours i think we just all need to just move in together at this point that's what you're trying to do yeah it just keeps going we're building everyone houses yeah we're just like we got the 500 acres man we are just building everybody houses well that way we just have to walk over to each other's houses i mean hey that's kind of nice yeah yeah that would be great pound i love it well let's get into ask tuck and fest we got three of us here so we'll do two questions each let's go guys who wants to go first me i think this one needs to go first all right so this one they had to send it in

the dms because oh this is good she said my fiancee um after six years of dating we love a grand old spicy time in the bedroom our sex life is no kind of boring well after doing so much over the years one day i was messing with him and i told him i wanted to eat his ass okay well after months of joking around and fucking with him one night after a night out of drinking he was like fine go ahead if you really want so i took my shot and did it after hounding him for months he had dried poop stuck in his hairy asshole and it ended up in my mouth and not appear hold on i'm gagging fuck hold it okay okay i had a pure embarrassment for me and him i just shut the fuck up and did my thing as nasty as that sounds disgusting at the time and wanted to bleach my face after but we joke about it and now i officially call him

swallow it bro she said i wanted to bleach my face after okay all right there's so much here to unpack so men if you're gonna have somebody eat your ass at least baby wipe the motherfucker if you're not gonna fucking give it a dude wipe yeah if you're not gonna take a shower before getting your ass ate give it a little wipey wipe with the dipey dipe okay like let's not have doo-doo balls encrusted in your fucking ass hairs and then make your fucking significant other have to eat that and you've got ptsd spitting them out like bitch when you get a piece of pepper stuck in your teeth oh god listen listen and listen bitch you're a fucking listen girl you are a savage to be able to do

that that is just absolutely uncomprehensible i could never if there was doo-doo balls i'm not doing it dude i would be like go hop your ass in the shower right now and then i'll go hey baby let's have a shower and then eat his ass in the shower you know like i'm sorry there's there's a line that has to be done because you can get sick wipe your butthole better why not have you ever had your butthole ate no i don't like that you don't like anything you are so pretty where are you where you shit, guys. Yeah, but not when it's clean. Yeah, but not when it's a fresh, clean shower. Yeah. Still.

It's... Tongue punch my fart box. I mean... Don't knock until you try it. I don't want to. I've already had bad experiences with assholes, remember? What happened? My couch.

Oh, yeah. And then you got shit on your couch. Oh, I mean, listen. At least it was my couch and not my mouth, though. But if he wants... Your ass isn't like that it's not doo-doo brown that dude fucking obviously didn't wipe clearly yeah all right well that girl was a fucking trooper dude i'm telling you right now i was coming in hot with

that one guys oh god go ahead are we done now go ahead hayley You're next. Oh, shit. Bunny, now that you have had the bucket list interview with Dolly, what's the next goal? I think we're going to turn up a notch in 2025. We're going to really double down on this podcast and try to have new ways to get it out there in innovative ways. So I think we're going to start like a kick or a twitch and do like once a week live podcasts um yeah we're going to start streaming um just once a month you know or once a week i'm sorry maybe we'll start out once a month see how the first one does and then we'll go from there and then we can like up it yeah but we'll see um but as far as like guests um no i know probably joyce myers or like you know just any i mean now that that's happened it's just like i just want you know anybody who feels comfortable to tell their story here and consider this podcast a safe space to come on

and just tell their story so i mean i had dolly on what more i'm done i'm retiring guys that's what i was so scared of i you guys genuine fear was at the end of it her being like okay i quit i'm done guys sorry mimi's taking over now yeah no i there's i just there's you don't top dolly parton dude you know there there's no way to top her she is a fucking god and there's just nothing you can do to top that it was like sitting in front of a saint I didn't know so many people had so many opinions about Joyce Meyer when I said that Joyce Myers was my other interview I loved on my backup account my backup TikTok account people were like upset and I'm like how can you be upset about a woman who preaches the word of God is there a

controversy behind I don't know if there is I've never known I just know that Joyce Myers has been through some shit and she uses her life to help and lift people up and she doesn't try to act perfect she tells people like hey man I was a piece of shit before and I was miserable and I tried to make everybody around me miserable and like you know like she's really honest about like miserable and I tried to make everybody around me miserable and like you know like she's really honest about like her journey in life so that's what I've always respected about her yeah yeah wow I don't know I have no idea I still don't know her huh don't know her I gotta send you one of her sermons to listen to she's so uplifting so yeah I will send you you a Joyce Meyers podcast just so that you can get on the bandwagon to Steph is asking, what's the one thing you all get weird about when it comes to sex? And there's absolutely no chance of it happening in the bedroom.

And also, what's the most surprising thing you've masturbated with? With? Yeah, I think I'm pretty normal. I don't think i've masturbated with anything crazy i'm very specific in my masturbation it has to vibrate i'm not just over here flicking the bean with my fingernails yeah no i can't do that i can't do it just strumming the banjo i saw a tiktok the other day where nail tech was, when you're finally down her acrylics and you all of a sudden can like smell where she's been. Ew. I was like, I swear.

I was like, what? Yeah, we got to ask Gina if that's a real thing. Yeah, that's insane. Yeah, I can't. I need something that vibrates. I'm not. There's no way I'm going to be fucking DJ Scratchy Sniff. I can't do it, dude.

There's no fucking way. Could you imagine though? DJ Scr dj scratchy sniff i can't do it dude there's no could you imagine i can't do it dude no dude could you imagine i never thought about like vagina smell on acrylics hey lee is there anything weird you've masturbated with no yeah i don't think there's anything what's what's up till i was like 19 i didn't have my first orgasm till i was in my 20s. The first time I ever had an orgasm was with a vibrator. I hear that a lot with women. Men can't find it.

Men don't know what they're doing. They never do. They think they do. Sorry, Jaime. They think they do. I still haven't found it. I have fucking problems over here. I'm still looking for it yeah I'm still looking yeah well obviously you're doing all right because you got a hot fucking girlfriend so obviously you could find the butt in a time or two is there

anything that's off limits in the bedroom for you guys clearly hers is butthole no Haley's got a whole list of shit that she doesn't like to do yeah yeah you don't look at me don't touch me yeah i don't she doesn't want to be cuddled she doesn't want to be kissed she doesn't want anything dude like i really don't enjoy it at all i really don't if i could not have sex or anything the rest of my life i would be fine oh i feel like you just haven't found that person who meets your no it makes you feel comfortable and makes you feel beautiful yes you do stop saying that you're speaking that into your life though words are because i don't want it that's you were at

his house the other day clearly you wanted it i was drunk exactly you ever seen me at someone's house sober no No. But clearly you like it. Hailey becomes a little sex kitten when she drinks. She gets a slow look in her eye. I don't want anything. Her little eyelashes bat. Because then you have to wake up and

do it sober every day and just be with them. They're still there. She hasn't found that person who makes part of your life that's like your best friend you gotta find somebody who's your homie yeah alone yeah no you'll get there yeah she will it's gonna sweep you off your feet when you least expect it maybe what's off limits for you in the bedroom like on myself or like both no i just like my husband will not let me see his asshole we know that but that's off limits for you no that's why you let me touch it what will you not

do i won't i i don't eat butthole that's just that's not gonna happen but you'll i want to see it but you'll get your ass oh for sure i don't want to see it for But you'll get your ass. Oh, for sure. I don't want to see it. For sure. After a good like bath or a shower or something. For sure. Let's go. I don't know if I have anything that's off limits in the bedroom. I would probably just say anything that has to do with pooping or peeing. Yeah. You're not pooping on me.

Like you're not pooping on me. You're not peeing on me. Unless we're in the shower. You can pee on me in the shower. I'm fine with that. When I broke Jason's dick that one time, I thought he was peeing on me unless we're in the shower you can pee on me in the shower i'm fine with that when i broke jason's dick that one time i thought he was peeing on me and i came up angry like i literally was like you were doing fucking what and then i like really he's like stark white i was so mad i legit thought because it was warm just like pouring out on me and i was like you're

fucking peeing on me right now like when did no absolutely fucking not just gushing blood yeah and then i saw how white he was and he's just looking at me and i looked down and i was like oh my fucking god oh just blood everywhere on the sheets terrible yeah yeah i mean i don't think there's anything i'm pretty open so yeah just like i don't love a lot of like bodily fluid kind of yeah i'm not'm not. I'm good with that, too. Not gargling with cum on a regular basis. Yeah. All right.

Next question. What is the best financial decision you made early on in your career? Financial decision was investing in myself. That's the best thing I would say. Yeah, for sure. That's the best thing you could ever do. Invest in yourself. Do not wait for somebody do invest in yourself do not

wait for somebody to invest in you because nobody's gonna come save you you need to invest in yourself and believe in yourself even when people tell you you can't do it you've always had your own shit and people don't realize we didn't go out like renting podcast studios no but he was quickly to be like this is mine yeah and like i'm not going to just go rent a place for a year and that kind of you know like you literally were like this is my equipment this is my camera this is mine yeah and like I'm not going to just go rent a place for a year and that kind of you know like you literally were like this is my equipment this is my camera this is my team this is my production company yeah no I I just genuinely believe that if you build it they will come and it doesn't matter if you've got 50 listeners because that 50 listeners can turn

into 50,000 you know very quickly and I just think that you know nobody can take what is yours and if you invest in yourself nobody can take that away from you and so I used my home money from OnlyFans to really fund this podcast and like get it off the ground and you know it was the best thing I ever did so yeah what about you guys a good question that's a good one what did you do did so yeah what about you guys a good question that's a good one what did you do damsel in distress a little damsel don't ask me for financial advice i'm like i made bad financial decisions yeah but you know what i did too when i was your age i did too like i i genuinely feel like in high

schools they should teach a fucking credit and business class and teach you how to like balance a checking count save money yeah i've never taught any of that yeah like how to purchase your first home like i literally had a good credit scores yeah how to have a decent credit score yeah like i feel like they should teach all of that in high school and they don't it's it's mind-boggling to me my financial was that i always invested in myself like i never rent things i don't believe in renting things i believe in like owning so it's like you know when me and jason first met i was like we're buying why would we go rent like yeah it's our money and then we can just invest it in ourselves. I just had this conversation with Jaime the other day.

Him and I were going back and forth about it because Jaime wants to buy a house. And I'm like, dude, get you your own home because then you're building equity on that home and you're investing in yourself. Yeah. And then you can always use that later on to like have growth if you want investment properties. Yeah. You take out like a HELOC on your home and you can go buy an investment property yeah and it's fun whenever you start being able to like invest and stuff like that and like really like start flipping stuff that's when it starts getting fun i love it yeah go ahead memes okay this one's a confession it says please keep my name anonymous

oh this is gonna be good this has been kept in my vault for years she said i saw my boyfriend's dad getting a hand job from my man's grandma his dad's mother-in-law it's a sight i'll never unsee or forget when i'm around him or her she's in her mid 80s with parkinson's oh no is what happened what did he do i that's what i was about to say though is he is she sure that's what was happening because that's elder abuse oh yeah that's elder abuse but people with parkinson's are fully aware they just are they a thousand percent are they okay this is just a neuron like mishap to where it causes you to shake where are fully there i need more information where was this

is he married is he single is this the first time yeah i don't feel like that's the first time were they just at thanksgiving dinner and she whipped it out and then just fucking whack it under the table? She started going for it under the table. I need more details before I can even make a real statement on this because that's insane. Dude, they came out crazy, this Aztell Confessed. Yeah. And these were all in the DMs. Like people were like, I got stuff to say.

Keep sending the dm ones yeah the dm ones are juicy but we need we'll circle back to that story because we need more information the rest of that story please yeah like where was it is he married because if he's married and he's getting whacked off by the grandma then that's fucked up you know like that's gross is grandma all there even if they said married literally is grandma all there though i mean everybody you know we don't yuck anybody's yum so maybe he likes older women you know but it's like you know is grandma all there if not then that's elder abuse have you if you haven't told anybody and she's not all there you need to tell somebody oh i would hope she did it doesn't hurt somebody

else you know like there's just so many things that i we can't even comment on because we don't know so we need the rest of the story and we're going to circle back next yeah was this on a holiday like what are we doing what day of the week was turkey just really got it going okay question bunny did you ever fall in love with a trick or a pimp if you had one if so what was that experience like if not how'd you separate your work from your feelings that's actually a really good question yeah no it's a great question and um you know i've spoken about this a lot and i talk about it in my book too that's coming out but i never had a pimp i always have done things independently i did not see the point of working my ass off, literally. Again, you had your own shit.

Yeah. And just to give it to a man who couldn't handle his finances better than me. No shade to the girls who have had pimps. I understand that that's a way of life. I have a lot of girlfriends who have P's in Vegas. And they're some of the best women that I've ever met. So, yeah. No, I never had a pimp.

I personally have never been able to fall in love with a trick because I can't get past the point of seeing them pay for a hooker. And even though I was the hooker that they were paying, I still don't want somebody I love to be a trick. That is the biggest turnoff for me. Like it grosses me out to no end. And, um, it's just because it takes a certain type of man to trick on a woman. They all have the same personality and being in the business for as long as I was, I was able to see who's a trick and who's not, you know? Yeah. And it's just something that turns me off. It's like, it's like if you look at a guy and he's super beta or a guy that's super alpha, which one are you going to go for? Some girls like really beta dudes. I don't. I like super alpha dudes. Some girls in the industry have fallen in love with tricks. I have a friend right

now who has literally booed up with one of her tricks and they've been together for a decade. And I love both of them. It's just, you know, it's a different lifestyle. And the way that I kept things separated was I never wanted to marry for money ever my dad raised me to marry somebody for money and I wanted to do the opposite of what Bill Carter taught me you know and I wanted to have love on my own and you know people used to always say you could marry whoever you want that's why when people call me a gold digger I laugh because it's like do you not think I could have married somebody else that fucking had way more money than my husband did especially when i first met him and does like there's just so many opportunities that i had to marry for money

and i always turn them down and i know my sugar some of my sugar daddies listen to my shit and because they still dm me and shit all the time and email me i know you guys are listening to this yeah no they they email me too i know some of you know you guys are listening to this. Yeah, no, they, they email me too. I know some of you motherfuckers are listening to this going, yep. She's telling the truth because there are so many of them that tried to marry me. And I was like, absolutely not. It's just something that was inside of me that I just never. So what's the definition of a trick? Is trick just someone who pays for a trick is a John. So it's somebody that you, you go and you turn a trick. So you are going to see that you you go and you turn a trick so you

are going to see a client they're they're the guys that spend money on girls so that's how you get the definition being a trick is that you paid for a service yeah you turn a trick yeah absolutely but yeah no shade to any of the girls who have you know married their um tricks or had these because you know i love all my girls in the industry and as long as you're not being hurt and you're not being trafficked go ahead girl make that money make that money honey and on that note we will go ahead and head on out and go fucking relax before we got to shoot this music video yep Yep. Let's go. I'll let you guys sign out today. Bye-bye.

Bye. Toodle-oo, motherfuckers. See you toots. Bye.