Dumb Blonde - Ask, Tell, Confess: I Ghosted the Panty Pimp

Episode Date: March 28, 2025

Meme kicks off this week's Ask, Tell, Confess with some ancient pyramid lore, and then it gets even weirder real fast. We hear a white trash love story (wiffle ball bat included), a surprise air dump mid-romp, a confession of ghosting a wannabe panty pimp. Plus, Bunnie's cam girl hacks, freaky fetishes, and a cautionary tale about rogue needles in the butt. Watch Full Episodes & More:www.dumbblondeunrated.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey guys, I need to ask you a question. I want to know why in the hell are you not on Patreon? I don't think you guys even realize how much content we have on Patreon. Let me break it down for you. We have the bunny XO show. We have meet the defaults. We have propaganda. We have more shows that we're adding.

And not to mention we have the visuals of the podcast. Head over to www.patreon.com backslash dumb blonde podcast and sign up. Okay. Okay. Now I'll just tell Convance. Yeah. Yeah. Hello friends. Welcome to Ask

Convance. Good one. That's a good one. Very subtle. Yeah, very gentle. I have cramps right now, so I didn't feel like giving it my all. Yeah. Shh. Good one. That's a good one. Very subtle. Yeah, very gentle. I have cramps right now, so I didn't feel like giving it my all. I feel that.

Yeah. Right? I might pop an ovary right now if I fucking push a little too hard, so. Let's not do that. Yeah. How's everybody doing? How you doing?

Who you doing? Ailey, you have to start telling me what you're gonna wear before you come. You should know, it's always gonna be camera. She does that to me too though. She showed up in my house in the same fucking outfit. You guys had that same outfit on one day. Yeah.

I don't know if you guys can see us right now. Bitch stole my look. Yeah. We're just heads. Mimi's wearing jeans today though. You wanna stand up and show everybody a little, her butt is smaller than mine now guys. I don't.

It is. Tiny little tookus. No. You got a tiny tookus. Yeah, do I? Yeah, you do. Tiny tookus. I like it.

That's a porn star name. Tiny tookus. Tiny tookus. I like it. I would click on it. All right, who's going to pop this off? Wait, can we talk about it? Talk about what?

Did you guys see what happened with the pyramids? No. Like in Egypt? The Egyptian pyramids. I'm only bringing this up because this is coming out next week, being this is current event. Did you guys know that they did like sound waves? Because you can do a sound wave and tell what like the shape of a building

is and stuff like that under the middle. It keeps going down. Bro it's bigger than the pyramid on top. Wait they did sound waves on the middle pyramid like the biggest one. Right. And they found out that it goes underneath the ground further than the size of it on top. There is caverns. Those photos are real. So that just means that there's an underground world under there? Pretty much. So this is like in the archaeology. I love like archaeology, TikTok. That's like one of my favorite things. And they have found that with these scans, it's basically five tunnels. Can you like hit it real quick?

Sorry. Five separate tunnels underneath. What is happening? I've seen those photos where it kind of looks like it's like the Pentagon or not the Pentagon. What is that building in Washington that's like? You know, I'm talking about. Nope. Top of it's like a pyramid, but then it's just like a trade

up and down thing. Washington Monument Monument. I don't know. I'm so bad with. Well, it basically showed that was underground. It almost looked like the pyramids were like covered in sand all the way up until the tip. Right. So the top or could just be underground. But I'm sure the pyramids fucking have some crazy shit. Oh, yeah. Technical. Yeah. I would like that. If you think about it, like all pyramids have like some mystical shit around them.

Like even the Luxor in Vegas is sinking. I would think, if you think about it, like all pyramids have like some mystical shit around them. Like even the Luxor in Vegas is sinking. Like that casino has more suicides in it than any other casino. Really? People literally- It's sinking? It's sinking. Oh yeah. It's literally like this, right?

Like that. What? It's sinking in Vegas. Like, and it's unheard of because shit doesn't sink in Vegas. You know, it's like a dry desert. But also on the inside, have you ever been inside the Luxor? The rooms wrap around the entire casino.

So it's open to the casino floor. So people jump to their death in the middle of the casino floor all the time. Are you kidding me? No, nope. It's terrifying. They do it all it and they don't report it on the news. What I mean, I know that there's like

a like in Reno too. There's like certain bridges and stuff. They have to be super careful because like people just go out and I mean, I didn't know that was a thing. My thing is is about bridges. How do you die jumping off a bridge? Like that's a legit question. Oh, because it's so high. Yeah, so the Golden Gate actually installed suicide prevention nets that catch people because so many people jumped off.

There's only one person to survive jumping off the Golden Gate. It's the momentum down, it's like hitting concrete. Whether it's water or not, it's like hitting concrete. Why would people wanna die that way? You know, and that's like another thing. That's not instant, right? So you would literally suffer and drown to death just with broken back. I think it would be instant. It's almost just like jumping out of building and hitting

the ground. Oh, so it's like your body ready shuts down knowing that it's going to hit something like the Skyway Bridge in Florida is one of the tallest bridges and they have people try to jump off of that and the minute you hit That water your bones shatter. Yes Well, I've heard of people having heart attacks Yeah, like before they hit the ground because it's like they know that they're gonna die So it scares them so much that they have a heart attack. Yeah, and just like when you want to go like What a morbid fucking conversation. Wow. Sorry guys. Sorry guys

Real deep real quick. It's alright don't worry about it. Go ahead major thing. The pyramids have five caverns down and then keeps going with poles all the way down. And they said it's unlike anything they've ever seen before in science. Crazy. Yeah. I'm intrigued. I wanna know what's under there.

Are there things, is there treasures? Are there people? There's bodies mummified for sure. They probably have like rulers who are like mummified. I love that stuff. I would love to go see that. When we do the Posty International Tour, are we going anywhere near pyramids?

I don't think so, no. Damn it. I wish we were. I don't think so. All I know is we're about to see every goth cathedral that they have to offer on that side of the world. I can't wait. I have one of the voicemails. I wonder this one. Kicking it off with a voicemail. Kicking it off with a voicemail guys. One of our patreons. This is called Needle Stuck. and I had an abscess on my thigh and I thought that I could poke it

and drain it myself rather than going to the hospital. So I grabbed a needle and I poked it and when I poked it, the abscess like sucked in the needle, like it was a vortex. Needless to say, it was one o'clock in the morning and I had to go to the emergency room and tell them that I had a needle stuck in my butt cheek. And they, of course, questioned me

and didn't quite understand. And yeah, long story short, I ended up having to have surgery to remove the needle from my butt cheek because it had moved from my thigh to my butt cheek because you know, it's a needle in flesh, right? And yeah, so that's my weird story. Hope you have a great day, love you, bye.

Okay, new fucking Fear Unlocked. I did not know if you got a needle stuck in your skin that it would move. Moves? And look how fast it moved. She literally poked herself at one o'clock in the morning and went to the hospital. And by that time it went from her side to her thigh

or her butt cheek. That's like, like that motherfucker was on the move. That's crazy. Also, I don't think I could do that. I could never poke something like that myself. I mean, I don't. I could do that. I could never do something like that myself. I mean, I don't. I'm scared. I'm a pussy.

I'm scared of like shit traveling to my brain. So there's a lot off your pussy lip. That's different. That's not assist with pus. That's my pussy lip, you know, like if it was pussy, then we'd have a problem. Yeah, I'm not joking. Fun fact, just so everyone knows, like when you get stuff like that, and you're squeezing and fucking with it, I didn't know how easy it was to get staph that way.

So Jason got, I had this little tiny pimple on his chest, he scratched it and he's a picker, so he's kinda popping it, popping it, popping it. It got fucking staph infection and it began to tunnel into his chest. Oh, God. Yeah, so now he's got this ginormous scar because they had to take out the tunneling. Yeah. So it's crazy. I had no idea and like that was even a thing. Oh

yeah. No, I've learned that but I also learned that about teeth too. Like teeth are like connected. Each tooth is connected to a vein that goes like this one is connected to my heart. So the one that I had pulled out was connected is connected to my heart, which explains why I always had heart palpitations, why my heart was always in arrhythmia. And since I've had it taken out, everything has calmed down. Like each tooth is connected to something in your body.

What? Yeah, like it's nuts. Didn't know that. Yeah, and if you have an infection, like an infected tooth and they pull it out, it can travel to your brain and kill you the infection yeah that's why tooth infections are so scary and some could travel to your heart and cause endocarditis and like yeah it's why is that why you like people get migraines a lot because it

could actually be their yes teeth affect people's health so much that they don't even realize it like Like it's insanity. Wow, you never knew. You're the dentist. Well, I shall go next. Hold on. Let me get the bifocals on. Here we go.

I've got three good ones. Show off. Which one should I do? Okay. Confession from Rendy. When I was in my addiction, I was trying to find ways to make money for, well, you know, I started talking to this guy who told me

he would help me sell panties that I had worn to men for a hundred dollars a pop, but there was a catch. He would do the first one free, but after that he wanted a BJ for each transaction he helped set up. But being the good girl I am, I got a sexy pair of panties, wore them real good if you know what I mean,

and met a stranger in the parking lot to sell my undies. He gave me $100 and off I went. Round two came and I knew I'd be getting $100 but would also have to pay up. I made the transaction pocketing another $100 and off I went round two came and I knew I'd be getting $100 But would also have to pay up I made the transaction pocketing another hundred dollars and ghosted the bastard who thought I was going to give him head as You should have you should as you should have that dude was trying to pimp you out and then cut off the middle man Yeah, literally like that dude got what he deserved. Absolutely. I used to sell my panties Like that dude got what he deserved. Absolutely.

I used to sell my panties. Yeah. Why am I not surprised? I'm not. Yeah, I didn't talk to me. I used to sell my panties, but here's the schtick. OK, because you guys know I'm a hustler, but you guys also know that I'm very weird about giving my DNA away. Oh, my gosh.

I would never let somebody have my DNA so that they could create some fucking hex or spell on me and then fucking I'm fucked up Schitt's Creek without a paddle so They used to have this like fake cum that you could buy like and make it look like you're squirting And it really is just fake cum So I would literally take the panties brand new panties and just pour the fake cum all in it and wad them all up Like that and then vacuum seal them and sell them So smart.

Yeah. Wow. Literally. Sorry guys, if you own a pair of my worn panties, but they were never worn. But I mean, that's part of the hustle, dude. And I just gave away free game that I probably should not have done, but you know.

There's never another set like panty sale. But you know what? There are girls who really wear them. know there's a lot of girls who yeah Who yeah them, you know like Lydia she sells panties all the time. She does I I've never understood the appeal and there's like guys who like want you to fart in them and then like vacuum seal So that when they open it up, yeah Sell farts and jars. Yeah, some girl did sell farts and jars. Yeah, I don't know if I can tell this story So Jason cut this out if you don't want this in there. Jason, you better

not you little bitch. This is about someone Jason knew. We just recently found out this story and I already- Jason's always got the best shit. Bro, I kind of want to call him and have him tell the story. Do it. The Great Rewards Hunt is on, so join the adventure with DraftKings Casino. For fun seekers, follow the trail to huge jackpots, weekly bonuses, and exclusive games. Plus, new players can get their losses back up to $1,000 in casino credits on their first day. Just sign up with CodeBunny, BU and IAE and start playing to get up to $1000 in casino credits, back with a minimum $5 net loss.

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Hey walk away from the kids real quick I want you to tell a story. You're on air. I'm not with the kids. Where are our children? In uh, Cash's room. I'm in the office working. Okay, cool. Tell them the story about your friend who was having that affair with that girl, the cashier. Oh my God. I'm not saying his name. No, no. Homeboy is pretty vanilla.

I'm talking like wafer vanilla. Okay. And I guess him and his cashier started chatting and he would have her bring dirty underwear to work so he can smell them. He can sniff them at work. And if I'm at work and then they would sneak over to a near business parking lot When they had sex he would make her Tell her or tell him how his other wedding night was so she was married and

They're having an affair and he would want to know about the husband and their wedding night It's always the fucking square ones and he would want to know about the husband and their wedding night. It's always the fucking square ones that I'm telling you. He's not joking when I say this dude was like white. He looks like a fucking sad puppy that you walk by the pound that wants to be adopted. Yep. But that you know, that's par for the course because super square dudes always have really weird fetishes, which that's not even that bad. I didn't think it was that bad. Did you? Oh, he's sniffing underwear. It's pretty weird.

Okay, I love you. I sniff my own panties sometimes. No, like the guy who said it was like one of those like situations like creepy thin man from Yes. And then okay, to continue the story husband finds out husband comes to the dude's work And confronts him as he's working and like comes in at night and is screaming through the store Where the fuck is he and yeah? It was a big and like and dude got fired

Cashier got fired like it was a big deal, yep, it was pretty bad. Sounds like a white trash love story. I mean, yeah, it's great. I like those. I just watched a Instagram reel of this girl putting an empty sushi container and saying, I just ate all this sushi. And the guy on the computer is like, oh yeah, how did that take?

Like getting off, it'll be a hair clip. She'll be like, I just used this in my hair. And he like, oh yes, clip it. No, that's how people are. When I used to do webcam, it was weird fetishes, man. Weird, weird, weird fetishes. Like people have strange things that they are into. It could be the simplest thing.

Like fucking brushing your hair. Some guys like to watch girls just get undressed and you not know that they are into. It could be the simplest thing, like fucking brushing your hair. Some guys like to watch girls just get undressed and you not know that they're there. Like some people, I used to have this guy who wanted me to act like I was dead. Yeah. No, it's really weird. Yeah.

Yeah. Some dude wanted me to hang myself on the back of my door. Didn't you have a chloroform guy one time? Yep, had a chloroform guy. Yeah, like there's a there's a lot of really different fetishes out there. They wanted like you to act like you had chloroform and like pass out. So that's like the start of a serial killer. Oh, for sure.

If they aren't already. Yeah, yeah, they probably got people in their basement. Yeah, for sure. Definitely. I like that. All Yeah, for sure. All right guys, I got a I got one for you. It's called the air dump dilemma Shit, like always. Here we go

Okay, this is from Christina. She said my story is about when my abuse of ex and I were about to have the hottest sex Because as you know when there's usually abuse the only time we can truly feel connection Is during sex time yep? So any who I'm going down on her and can tell she's about to You know I'm going all in at this point because once I hear you're about to explode it gets me Almost there because it gets me okay. Whoa. You got a lot of detail in here. It's like well I must really put it on shorty because she took an air dump. Is this a girl or a guy? Girl. OK.

Mm hmm. Girl on girl. OK. And she took an air dump right in my face when I was mid tongue emoji suck finger. And I about gagged and I kept going like the Scorpio sex champ I am. Also, just to make her not feel embarrassed, I acted as if I didn't notice, but the whole time I'm thinking about her and spicy food do not agree. Why didn't she stop it?

I couldn't. I couldn't keep going. Yeah, I wouldn't be able to keep going. Did she not know the turd flew out was the question. If you have spicy food, you can know that that was warm. You can smell it. I cannot handle it. Smelling like a crab apple. You know what a crab apple smells like? No, just sounded good.

That was nice. Crab and apple together. Crab and apple together? I can't with you. I hear it. Smell it, right? That was a great together. I can't hear it. I hear it. You smell it, right? That was a great one. It was good.

OK, wait, I'm next. Very detailed. You already had a story that you just told. Oh, yeah, I did. Why are you freaking cutting in front of me? Hold on. Let me get my bifocals on. Three, remember? Yeah, we're not doing three.

I'm doing two. OK, hold on. I want to go home. No, we're not doing three. I'm doing two. OK. Hold on. She said, I want to go home. This is a lot for me today. You know what? It has been a really big day. Three days after your surgery? Yeah.

We've already done business lunches, multiple recordings. It's crazy. This one is from Emmy Bear. Tell. I'm telling the story on my husband's behalf. So back in the day, before we were adults and found recovery, my husband was married to the town tramp. He had recently caught her cheating on him,

so they split up. A couple days go on and they run into each other at a party. Needless to say, they ended up hooking up that night, but he didn't fuck her with his dick. He fucked her with a wiffle ball bat. Yep, it was consensual. I've always found the story hilarious, especially the way my husband tells it He is very much an alpha and has huge on loyalty So I'm sure he gave her the business with that wiffle ball bat

He literally would die if he hears this while I'm watching patreon. I Did it like this? I did it like that. I did it with a wiffle ball bat. So BC boys. Yes, I always got a little too. Listen, first of all, wiffle ball bats are pretty thick. Yeah, my mind literally. I was just playing with one in the backyard about. I need to see the circumference of this with a lot of them. They make that are like this big.

I just want to know whose pussy hole is that big, dude? Was it a new one? Did you play a game of with a ball before? Who cares if it was new or used? I mean, I just need to see how big this thing is before it goes in the pussy hole. Like how do some of these women get things in there? Hey, traffic cone.

Oh, I remember that. Remember the Horlimpics though, the **** ones that they were sitting on? Oh, that like freaking tentacles. It was crazy. There's something going on with the Horlimpics. I wish we could bring it back. That was a good time. Yeah. Are we not allowed to do Horlimpics anymore? We are not. Okay. Why? We just do it privately for us. Yeah. Can we say we're gonna air it and we don't? Anyways, how do you guys feel about the

Wiffleball bat? I was playing with a Wiffle Ball bat the other day, so I mean, I guess it depends. Oh, wait. Why is it so long? It's long in the tooth. That's girthy. Because I was not the one we were playing with the other day.

That is still round as fuck to be shoving in your vagina. What was he, fucking just standing above her, like shoving it in like an or like, what the hell, dude? That's a big thing. I can understand like, I don't know, end of a water bottle, but like a whole ass. You can understand the water bottle. I mean, that small. Yes, I mean, like a waffle bell bad, like that's like this big, like you're. Sometimes they get like this big around. bat like that's like this big like you're

Skinny one, I think he was better off have believing her as an ex I mean she was the town tramp so the size I guess didn't matter if she was a town tramp He wasn't cheating I know this was back in the day Yeah, she was cheating on him and so he fucked her with a wiffle ball bat. He wasn't cheating. Oh no, this was back in the day. She was cheating. Yeah, she was cheating on him. And so he fucked her with a whiffle wall bat to get back at her. And she let him. I don't know.

We're not judging her. We're big props to him for being able to do it. But I mean, yeah. I'm still trying to figure out how she fit it in her hootenanny. Wild But I mean, yeah, I'm still trying to figure out how she fitted in her hootenanny. Wild. I mean, if it was skinny, like if it was one of those ones like we just pulled up, though, that's still pretty round. Even that much. That's round.

How are you fitting that in there? It's a lube. Go ahead, Mimi, go. I cannot with you. Silicone or water? What kind of lube? I'm gonna say silicone. Silicone lube is my favorite.

I hate water lube. I don't like it. It gets sticky and crusty. I don't like it. Silicone lube is like just smooth all the time. You could even use it in water. So Alyssa. I tried it.

Alyssa. Back in the day when I had a sex life. The more you know. Alyssa says. Yes. Hello, you've said my name three times. Sorry. After having my second son I chose to get a birth control because I refused to tie my tubes. Saying I was too young at 28. After being on the pill before I chose the ring. Well one night after a hot and heavy session something felt different. When he pulled out, we were finished.

Well, needless to say, we have a new inside joke on the age old game ring toss. My ring somehow managed in all the positions we were in make its way out and onto his penis. He laid there laughing, threw it away and joked about not having another ring toss turned in to a third son 18 months younger than my second. Oh no. I love the show. Been watching since day one. Enjoyed good laugh. Thank you, Alyssa. I love that. That there's so many different ways of birth control that I don't feel like are that accurate.

Like the old school sponge. I love this. I love the makeup sponge trick. Remember when I thought she was talking about an actual like square sponge? Like, yeah. But it's the round ones. Yeah.

Well, no, like there used to be a birth control called the sponge. Oh no, what is that? Yeah, that's how my mom is here. So my grandma, that's why my mom and her brother are 19 years apart. She was using the sponge method and it was like a birth control option. But it's a sponge, right? It's essentially like a sponge.

Yes. And it's supposed to like make sure you don't get pregnant. And here came my mom. Yeah. No, they have so many, but that ring, dude, fuck. I wonder if it hurt on his wiener. That's what I was like, did it cut off circulation? Like how big is it? What if it got stuck on him? Oh God.

Oh man. That happened to somebody I went to school with. Yeah. Cause the rings are like, oh my God, they're that big. Yeah. Do you put them in yourself? I've never done these. No, I think I never have either,

but I think you have to have them put in. Yeah. And sometimes you have to like have like to have them removed is like a thing. I know that the little like umbrella looking ones. Yeah, that's great. Like those scare me. Yeah. What it's called.

Or is that a bomb? All that shit scares the hell out of me. It's IUD. What is it? IUD. Isn't. It's IUD. What is it? IUD. Isn't that a bomb? No. They do IUDs and IVF too.

Because it's like a thing that goes up in you and it... Yeah. Yeah. I saw a girl tape hers to her wall before. That's crazy. That was on TikTok. People are funny. Nana, what great decoration. Nana. It's IED. You guys, we done? Mm-hmm. All right. All right, and on that note, we're out of here. I love you guys. Bye.