Dumb Blonde - Ask, Tell, Confess: No Dookie Sticks

Episode Date: November 1, 2024

You came in HOT for this week’s Ask, Tell, Confess! We’ve got a shocking confession from a nurse, the lowdown on wet dreams, and advice for a listener looking to give her man a little more backdoor lovin’. Bunnie also shares her healthy eating tips and an update on this year’s raunchy Christmas song.Watch Full Episodes & More:www.dumbblondeunrated.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey guys, I need to ask you a question. I want to know why in the hell are you not on Patreon? I don't think you guys even realize how much content we have on Patreon. Let me break it down for you. We have the Bunny XO Show. We have Meet the D-Fords. We have Popaganda. We have more shows that we're adding.

And not to mention, we have the visuals of the podcast. Head over to www.patreon.com backslash dumb blonde podcast and sign up ask tell confess ask tell confess Hello, senoritas. Welcome to Ask, Tell, Confess. I tried to put a little vibrato on it do you know how many people ask me to do that in meet and greets it's so funny i'm like i've had a podcast for six years nobody asked me to do anything from that

give me the whistle yeah literally do the roar mimi's back in the house baby hey she's been gone forever 20 days fucking shit i told her i think it's been 15 she goes i round up i was like motherfucker you can't get past me we're happy to have you back, though. Thanks. We always try to pretend we can get along without you. And then when you're back, we're like, we missed her.

I hope you guys did. Did you miss me, Jaime? A thousand percent. You guys do love me. Yeah. Well, today we have our plates full with the Ask, Talk, and Fest. You guys really delivered. If you're on my Patreon, you always get a chance to be a part of these weekly segments.

And you guys are allowed to ask, tell, or confess. And you guys did not disappoint this week. This was intense. No, there was a lot. Yeah. I was actually very shook. Oh, by the way, if you're watching this and wondering why I look like I'm half dead, it's because filmed for what like six hours yesterday down on broadway so tired hayley of course always looks beautiful she has makeup on but fucking i walked in mimi's laying down on the couch i'm pmsing this is the

longest pms i've had it's been going on for two weeks i know right it's crazy it's just i've been using it as an excuse to eat whatever the fuck I want. We had cane sauce night at nine o'clock at night. I would never do that if I didn't blame it on my period. But anyways, long story short, I have no makeup on today. So to all the haters who are always like, why does she always have to have freaking makeup on? Well, if you followed my TikTok, you would see me look like this all the time.

But yeah, here you go. Here I am all in the flesh flesh all a mess all right who's gonna read the first question oh i'm coming in hot ready let's better not be behind i'm swear to god oh no this was this was a private message okay read it no but i think didn't we send it to hayley too oh i only sent it to you oh Oh my God. I can't wait to see it. Read it. All right. And I cannot say this person's name because this has to stay private. I am sure. It's so gross.

Oh, this is good. This is good. I'm hoping this is the correct way for a tell, but I must remain anonymous because I don't want to lose my job. I am a nurse who works in the operating room. We had a patient come in for a foreign object stuck in their rectum. Just, no, lay it on me. And they had to have it surgically removed. The entire staff was aware that the foreign object was a vibrator,

but once it was removed, I said, that's a honey bunny vibrator. So of course I had to tell the entire OR staff all about you girls. The reason for this tell is because the patient asked for it back because they want to bring it to a meet and greet to get signed girls please do not sign any vibrators you literally have no idea where they've been don't do that don't ever do that don't do that i don't want your little dookie stick okay do not bring dookie sticks to freaking was it in her butt or in her big one it was in her butt it was in her butt how did she okay i need to know how she got it up there you don't put anything in there that doesn't have a stopper what would you say it's a send us a video yeah oh man do you remember the time we

watched that girl shove a traffic cone inside of her yes that was crazy oh and the tentacle yeah remember that one time you made me watch that guy we showed jay too didn't you show Yeah. Remember that one time you made me watch that guy? We showed Jay too. Didn't you show Jay? Wait, what did I, what guy, what'd the guy do? You made me watch that dude back into the one that was suctioned up to the wall.

Oh, is that the guy that sent it to me on my OnlyFans? And because I had to see it, I had to share it with you. Yeah. Guys used to send me the weirdest shit on my OnlyFans. Sorry, Bessio. I know Bessio is going to fucking probably make us cut this but i did have an only fans in my former life okay and in the dms i don't know why guys thought it would turn me on but they would send me videos of them like backing into things oh yeah like that's not my kink if that's your kink i love that for you go off shorty but that's not my kink and i was just i mean he was she said if i had to see this you have to see this yeah but i didn't see this yeah definitely

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I'll sign whatever you want me to sign, but I'm not signing something that's been in you, okay? I'll do the little carpaccio around your butthole, whatever you want me to do, but not signing. I like the carpaccio around your butthole whatever you want me to do but not signing the carpaccio not signing something that you had to have dis dislodged out of you surgically surgically it's great yeah i mean well at least we know they work i hope she had a good time i mean yeah did you like the money yeah um but our vibrators work ladies and sex education don't put

anything up there that doesn't have a stopper no don't do that big yeah yeah okay she was getting going off yeah i mean did it just suck it in like well what happens is one time tasha was was using anal beads and she'll tell you the story. She tells the story all the time, but she orgasmed while the anal beads were in her and it sucked them right up. Yeah. They had to pull them out one by one. Bloop, bloop, bloop. Like, yeah, it was bad. So I guess there's some sort of like when your body, the muscles tense up, it just sucks whatever's in your hole in there. Like a vacuum. Yeah. Yeah. I've never had it happen to me, but I've heard stories. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Well, someone else's turn.

I'm going to go. Have you guys ever orgasmed in your sleep? No. Yeah. It's like a wet dream. It is. See, I thought only men had wet dreams. I knew.

I orgasmed in my sleep last night. Oh. Is that why you woke up in such a good mood? It's like a wet dream. It is. See, I thought only men had wet dreams. I orgasmed in my sleep last night. Oh, is that why you woke up in such a good mood? Oh, it was good. Let me tell you. It was great. But like, I don't even have to be having a sexual dream. And sometimes it'll just, I'll just, or I used to have them all the time.

Like it was to the point where I was orgasming in my sleep all the time. That's a ghost playing with your. You have like, what? No, I would know. I would know if it was a ghost playing with your like what no i i would know i would know if it was a ghost because i wake up when it happens i know when it's about to happen she's like i want to experience it wake up i i wonder if it's like a hormonal thing i don't know you have testosterone of a fucking ufc fighter yeah i i don't know ladies let me know if you orgasm in your sleep i want to know know how common it is. And any of my nurse and doctor people that are listening to this, let me know what that is. Is it a condition? Because I have it. I would like to know what it is. And I mean,

it's glorious. I mean, there's nothing wrong with it. How you've orgasmed in your sleep, right? Once, twice, how many? maybe once or twice yeah it's just like a wet dream but are you having sexual dreams no yeah no yeah all right cool we'll see you know what's weird it's always around it's always around my period so then it has to be hormonal because my period's literally about to start any hour now so it has to be yeah it has to be a hormonal thing hayley have you orgasm do you orgasm yes okay i'm just making sure because there's some women who go through life that don't orgasm and don't know don't know don't do it in my sleep yeah i'm awake i'd like to be awake for that i mean you're sleeping but you wake up for the orgasm it wakes you up and piss me off hyman have you ever came in your sleep you know they always talk about

hyman's face i looked over he was like he was waiting here's the thing i've always been told oh have you ever had a wet dream and i never knew what that was because it's never happened to me yeah never so I've never had a wet dream wow that I can recall and I will tell you if I have yeah I cannot recall ever a time in my life when I have had a wet dream I wonder if it's just high testosterone a could be I don't know all All right. Nurses, doctors, diagnose us. We would like to know what it is. Go ahead, Haley Cakes. I guess this is a confess. What's the difference between tell and confess? Tell is like you're telling a story.

Confess is like you're confessing a sin or you're confessing something. Okay, maybe this is telling a story. Someone confessed a murder. Yeah, I like that. That was intense. What? I had two murders confessed to me. So I used to do, if you are a longtime follower of me, I used to do Ask, Tell, it was two murders confessed to me. So I used to do,

if you are a longtime follower of me, I used to do ask, tell, confess every Sunday on my Instagram for fucking six years, seven years. Like I've always done it probably longer. And during that stint on my Instagram, I don't know if these people didn't realize that I could see their profiles. People don't realize they think it's anonymous.

I found that out. Shut the fuck up. I swear. Somebody confessed, two different people confessed murdering somebody on my thing. And I only used one of them one time. And I was like, hey, man, love you guys. Do not want to be a part of this. Like, dude, I love that you trust me with this information.

That's crazy. 911. Yeah. Well, no, everybody else was was like you need to report that person and i'm just like no that's not a fucking snitch yeah well it's not even about being a snitch it's just like one you don't know if it's true i mean they could be doing it for attention right it's like two it's like obviously they needed to get it off their chest you know and i'm probably gonna catch backlash for that but it's like three it's not my fucking place out

of sight out of mind i don't want to know like i i don't i don't want to know if it's real or if it's not you know what i'm saying so okay well i'm gonna say this is a tell okay um someone said i work at a bar my second week there a man offered me two thousand dollars to eat skittles out of his butt and my best friend's first few months working there she watched an old woman on a scooter get fingered she's now known as scooter cooter and she's and she's watched a man in a trench coat shit himself and shake his turd out of his pant leg then leave where does this person fucking i gotta go i gotta go these are my people and yeah please tell us where this is at because we're on tour it's in florida

probably i need to see this guy shake a turd out of his leg that's my scooter cooter can you imagine that being your nickname for life just scooter cooter oh what a name i mean a little jealous we nickname people some weird shit sometimes scooter huh i want to get fingered on a scooter i mean it doesn't sound like a bad time i got a fucking scooter man yeah there's been one on tour bus this whole time uh thanks for the pod yeah you guys talk all that shit and never fucking i know yesterday i'm scared yesterday she puts my hand on her thigh and I immediately moved it a centimeter towards her.

And her fucking legs clamped so tight, like a freaking iron curtains. Just fucking shut. Just shut. I'm not actually serious. Oh. Have you started planning your infamous Christmas song yet? Oh, you took my question. Oh boy, have question. Oh boy.

Have we? Oh boy. We get into the studio November 1st cause this Ask Talconfess comes out tomorrow. So we get into the studio November 1st and we're hopefully going to write a banger. And we're actually writing with two fricking huge songwriters. Like this is almost, it's never been a dream of mine, but now that it's happening, it's a dream because it's like Jesse Joe Dylane dylan an amazing freaking songwriter dude and she's an aquarius love her grammy nominated like she's a freaking queen dude and then alicia vanderheim i always

say her name the wrong way vanderheim something like that she's a boss dude she's written like i so many hits that are on the radio and stuff like that. And I'm not trying to get radio play. I mean, this is all just a joke, but I mean, country music, if you would like to pick up one of my raunchy Christmas songs, let's do it. Um, but I think this year we might do a country Christmas song tentatively. We're not sure. Cause we've done jazz. We're not sure because we've done jazz. We've done rap. We've done freaking everything.

We've done sexy. Like we've done everything. So I think this year we're going to make it a country Christmas song. And yeah, it's going to be fun. We always have fun with it.

We always play with it. And we got to figure out a day to shoot the freaking music video. Yeah. So I'm excited. So hold on to your little pantalones, ladies. We are going to have out a day to shoot the freaking yeah music video yeah so i'm excited so hold on to your little

pantalones ladies we are going to have a freaking country christmas this year i cannot wait and it'll probably drop like somewhere around like middle of november last week in november what so aggressive what do you got my turn alright so Brittany how can I get my husband to let me play with his cute ass slash asshole

he will not let me massage the tank while I'm doing the BJ he will let me massage the tank strip while i'm doing i'm doing the bj i purposely didn't pick this one because i'm like everybody thinks i'm obsessed with buttholes so i'm not doing it me yeah um and he comes so hard he will let me reach around and play with his balls while i ride him but as soon as i get to the hole, that's a nope.

Jaime, you like a little butt play? A little gooch action's not bad. Like, hold the microphone. Just a little gooch action's not bad. Do you like it licked, or do you like a finger just ramming your little hole? A little bit of both. Maybe a little switcheroo

works, but not in the booty hole. How about a thumb? of both maybe a little you know a little switcheroo works but not in how about a thumb would you take a thumb a pinky you know what if you did i wouldn't be able to notice i think oh so you like to feel it yeah i mean at first i did it but it grew on me it grew on me have you ever had a vibrator up there no no no. So you haven't graduated. You've only had fingers. Yeah, yeah. It's a jog for me, not a full-on sprint. I'll wait. It's a Sunday for me, so, you know, just cruise. Oh, my God. Oh.

Yeah. Fucking Jaime. All right. Well, what was her question? how she could get her man to so let us she wants she wants to stick maybe give jaime a call yeah yeah we'll let you answer it as a dude how could she you know how did you graduate to that point yeah um it's got to be at a good time so either you know possibly right after the shower so i'm not feeling gross and i'm kind of a little open to it you know and make me feel like it's your idea and you want to do this

it'll make you happy because then it's not gay then it's not gay i love that i love that yep that's good advice that's straight from a dude right there i love this i love it maybe take a shot or something yeah take a shot or something I mean don't relax yeah you just you want to feel comfortable as a dude and yeah

I think that's the way to do it interesting okay I enjoyed this I'm gonna take this conversation south I mean north

we already went south that was south I'm going north how excited are you for good night in Nashville the bar yeah I mean I'm super excited we got to see you for good night Nashville? The bar? Yeah.

I mean, I'm super excited. We got to see it last night. Yeah, we got to see it. I'm going to be in that bitch every weekend. Good. Just be on the third floor. It's going to be like a meet and greet. Because I have my own floor.

So be on. You guys. I'll be promoting Bunny's floor every weekend. Do it, baby. Good night Nashville. Bunny XO level three, I believe is what floor my, uh, floor will be on.

And we're excited. January, February, it should be opening up. Um, we were hoping new year's Eve, but Vessio said that we, she doesn't see that happening. So we'll let you guys know when it opens up,

but it's going to be a big to do man. When it opens up, it's going to be behind the bar. Every freaking, I might be making drinks. You never know. What are your favorite things to make or advice for someone that is trying to eat clean i know you do healthy smoothies too

and i think maybe you guys everybody's been trying to eat healthy on this journey so i think the easiest thing to do if you're just starting out is one you have to know if you're gonna if you're gonna be eating healthy it's gonna be boring you have to eat a lot of the same foods, a lot of the same things. Like it's just not, uh, I mean, you can, once you start learning what you like and stuff like that, then you can start jazzing it up. But starting out, I would just do chicken and rice, ground chicken and rice, do chicken and potatoes. Like just keep it simple with salads and veggies and then go from there. If you're not a chicken person, do some salmon, do some fishes, steak some fishes. Steak. Things like that. You can get a lot of protein

in with seafood. I'm not a huge chicken person. Yeah. I feel like it messes with my hormones. So it makes me feel really yucky after I eat it. So I tend to go towards

the seafood side of things. I do love red meat, but I know it's got a lot of fat in it. So like salmons and a lot of shrimp. I love shrimp. Mm-hmm.

Filet mignons don't have a lot of fat rib there's certain cuts of red meat that don't yeah for sure yeah yeah but like ribeyes and stuff like that of course have a lot of fat i cannot prime rib is my favorite and has so much fat i don't like i don't like fatty yeah red meats yeah yeah It makes me, I don't know. I like short rib because it's like the string cheese of meat. That sounded fucking gross. Nothing about that sounded good. What? I don't like thick pieces of meat in my mouth because when I like. Okay, okay.

I've seen videos. I know that's a lie. When I keep chewing the same thing over and over, I start to gag. Okay. All right. Thank you guys for tuning in to another Ask Chael Confess. See y'all next week. Bye.