Dumb Blonde - Danae and Mandie: Straight as a Wet Noodle

Episode Date: March 29, 2023

It's a breath of fresh air this week as Bunnie welcomes Mandie and Danae, two beauties that found love, marriage, and community, all starting with one simple slide into a DM. Danae opens up about her experience growing up in Alabama where she struggled with her sexuality and OCD, while Maddie shares her story of coming from California and feeling like she didn't want to be put in anyone's box. These two amazing women found each other on the IG, and have been each other's saving grace ever since.  Danae Hays: TikTok Mandie Kaii: TikTok   Mandie + Danae: YouTube    Watch Full Episodes & More: www.dumbblondeunrated.com   See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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all right gentlemen coming to main stage next this is bunny get up there she's got a tornado of titties coming your way get those dollar bills ready she's got an ass that shakes like michael j fox so get up there and throw throw throw them dollars dude that is fucking iconic what's up you sexy motherfuckers welcome to another episode of dumb blonde today we have a breath of fresh air i was just telling them off camera that i tried so hard to dig up dirt on them and i couldn't find one thing and i was thrilled about it. Danae and Mandy Hayes. How are you guys doing? Good. Thank you so much for having us. I really am happy we don't have any dirt. I haven't tried digging and I don't want to. I know. I mean, it was, I was just, normally I just have to do like a little Google search and then I can find something and I couldn't find anything.

So I was like, yes, it wasn't on the first page. I don't have to fucking go any farther. How are you guys doing? Good. Probably exhausted. We've done nothing for a year and one month now of house remodeling. Dude, tell me about this. So Mimi was telling me you guys bought like a 1920s house or something like that. Tell me about it. 1990s house. 1990s, okay. And bought it and everything was original. The bedroom was still pink bathroom was pink like bubble gum pink what's wrong with a pepto-bismol bedroom it was it was it you know i could have a pink

moment yeah i could appreciate a pink moment but that pink was dusty yeah i hate that yeah in the carpet so we have ashy ass yeah yeah like you could smell the moths. Oh, no, I hate that. Moth balls. Yeah. I hate that. So even like the carpets. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, we had to get somebody in there to sage the house like on week three

because Mandy was like, I swear somebody has died in this house. And I was like, Mandy, it was built in the 90s, not the 20s. So then she made me call the realtor, talk to the realtor, and she's like, no, ma'am, nobody has died in that house. And they have to tell you, right? Yeah. Okay, yeah. So you guys have just been working on this house for a year.

That's got to be like just so fulfilling and frustrating all at the same time. Yeah, you know, Mandy's really good at interior design. Me, not so much. Like I bought a pickup truck just because I wanted the excuse of a pickup truck. And I wanted to be able to say that I needed it to like haul stuff to the dump um but does does she actually haul stuff to oh yeah oh yeah I'm like the haul she's like let me go take my truck baby yeah okay meanwhile here's the persona coming out I know the gay the gay stereotype of me and he's like picking the paint color, going to the stores.

Like she's, God, she's thriving with it. I'm exhausted because I don't find any of that all too fun. Yeah, you're like, I just want to rest. Yeah. When is it going to be done? It's like 80% done now. We just have some bathrooms left. But other than that, we've renovated the entire house, which has been wild.

Yeah. You know, I I when we first moved here we moved here from Austin and we put a house on her contract and it was a brand new home and that was my decision and then some stuff happened to it so we fell out of contract and then Mandy found this house and I was like how the hell did we go from brand new to my great grandparents just moved out of this house and we shot grandma's house. Right.

And we have to completely redo it. But no, it's been really rewarding. And watching Mandy, because she thrives in that element. She loves design and whatnot. But it's been fun watching you do it. Do you feel like it's been a task that has kind of brought you guys together as a team? Divided and conquered or what? I've found that Danae cares about the things that i don't and

i care tremendously about the things that she does that's a great team yeah that's been really nice yeah we've definitely had to work on our communication skills i love that though so i can't wait to dive into you guys's love story but i want to find out like about you and your childhood and you and your childhood and then when you guys met. So if we can start, like, Danae, we'll start with you. Okay. You're from Alabama, right? Yeah. Tell me about that.

I was born and raised in a really small town in Alabama, like just super rural. I think it was like maybe a thousand people. I went to the same high school that my grandparents went to, and I would eat lunch underneath my dad's graduation photo in the cafeteria. Yeah, like a real true Southern Mayberry style. Did everybody have a graduation photo or just dad? Nope, everybody did. Everybody did.

That's how small the school was. That's crazy. So yeah, it was just a really tight-knit community, and everybody knew everybody. My parents were pretty well-known. They both had businesses in the town, and I was like the star athlete I ended up going to play softball at the University of Alabama and that's that's just kind of was my niche was softball that's what I was known for but I when I was like eight years old I crawled in bed with my mom one day she was taking a nap and I started crying and she was like what's

wrong baby and I was like I think I like I think I mom one day, she was taking a nap and I started crying and she was like, what's wrong baby? And I was like, I think I like, I think I like Cassidy. And she was like, well of course you like Cassidy baby, she's your best friend. And I was like, no, I think she's really pretty. And my mom was like, well she is really pretty. I think my mom was like, what the fuck? And uh, so that went on for about two years of me having those conversations and then um when I was did you always feel like that even before you spoke up about it oh you always just attracted to women 100 it it's it was as natural as a thing I I'd never heard the word gay I didn't

know what the word gay meant um and you know this was back in the 90s so there wasn't a lot of exposure of right gay people um so it's not like I was conditioned or exposed to gay. Right, right, right. It was just a feeling that I had that was as natural as, you know, a little boy thinking a little girl was cute. Yeah. But then when I was 10, those feelings got more and more. I those feelings got more and more and and then I um you know tried to have those conversations with my parents and they weren't keen on those conversations so I didn't have anybody to really talk to well I mean point blank I didn't have anybody to talk to when you say they weren't keen

was it more of like them just like trying to hush you yeah or was it like them just like we don't want to talk about it right now at more at that point because I was so young um it was more of just like let's not talk about that right now they probably thought you were gonna grow out 100 oh yeah yeah and I was super tomboy you know I I've raced dirt bike not race but I you know ride dirt bikes I wanted to hunt I wanted to fish I'm like the epitome of every Luke Bryan song you've ever heard. And so I think they always knew I was like super tomboy, but they were hopeful that that wouldn't change my sexuality for whatever reason, even though, you know, I couldn't change that. So when I was 10, I started to develop extreme obsessive compulsive disorder. And I now know that that was my body and my mind trying to give

myself some sense of control since I had no control over my thoughts and no control over just how I felt. And so I was going through the whole spiel of obsessive compulsive disorder from the ticks to the counting to the, um, one of my biggest ticks was I would have to tell my parents at nighttime about 20 to 25 times, I love you, I love you, before I'd go to bed because I was afraid that they were going to die in their sleep. So just severe obsessive compulsive. So at that point, my parents were like, we need to take you to a counselor, a therapist, to get you some help. So I just remember at this point, I was like 10 or right at 11 and we

went to the first counselor and my mom was like, we're going to get in the car and we're going to go see this doctor today and he's going to help you. And, uh, it's funny because I think as a kid, you, you, your brain kind of cartoon, like they, we, we cartoonize if that's a word, but we characterize, we put these things as cartoons where like i thought i was going to see this magic man that was gonna like like the wizard of oz yes like he's gonna do this potion and i was gonna be fixed um and so my dad was driving my mom was uh in the passenger seat and we went and we saw this guy and we went into his office and he was like why do you think you're here today and i just said said, well, you know, I have all these weird tics that I do. And, um, I, he asked my parents, like, what was the deal? Like, why do you think

she does this? And they said, we don't know, blah, blah, blah. Well, then he asked my parents to leave the room and he said, today, you know, go into depth with me. Why, why do you think, why do you think you have to touch the doorknob 10 times or tell your parents you love them 20 times at night. And I said, well, I think it's because I have a secret. And he goes, well, what's your secret? And I go, I think my secret is that I like girls. And he goes, well, why do you keep that a secret? And I was like, in my head, I was like, is he trying to get me in trouble? Because I know I'm not supposed to talk about this. And I said, well well I think it's a secret because I'm not supposed to talk about it and he goes but why can't you talk about it and I said because it's wrong and I just remember this guy looked at me and he smiled he had such a warm smile and he said um Denae there's nothing wrong

with whether you like a boy or you like a girl, there's nothing wrong with that. And I just, it was like this weight was lifted off of my shoulder and I just, I just felt like, like my chest could take a deep breath again. And I just remember I heard, yeah, I felt heard for the first time. And I went and I got out in the car with my parents. It was like a consultation type meeting to see if this was going to be a good fit. And it wasn't a good fit because mom and dad did not think it was going to go that way so yeah so exactly so I'm sitting out in the back seat and I'm smiling really big and I just remember my mom like propped her arm on the wrist and she turned around and she goes so how did it go what what do you say and I said um he said there's nothing wrong with me like in Cassidy and uh my mom hauled off and

punched my dad in the shoulder and he said I thought you booked a Christian counselor and my dad said he was a Christian counselor so that was the first time that I realized you can't like girls I still didn't know what the word gay was I just knew it was a feeling that I had and it felt like who I was um but that was the first time I realized okay well this Jesus that my mom and dad speak of and the church that they take me to, I don't have a place there if I'm the way that I am. So it developed severe religious trauma and spiritual trauma. So then about a week later, they took me to another counselor. Sorry, I get so upset talking about this stuff. Not in a bad way because I want people to hear this, but it's just, it's like sends vibrations in my body

because it's like a child shouldn't have to go through this. People need to hear this. And I too grew up in a very religious Southern Pentecostal household where it was either you are good or you're bad and you're going to hell or you're going to heaven. There's no in between. There's no energies. There's no like, it's literally just fear based.

100%. And people need to talk about religious trauma more, because a lot of issues in children, you know, from our generation, stuff that happened to us is because of this, the fear that our parents instilled in us. 100%. And the types of relationships you find yourself in as an adult is 100% derived from, you know, the trauma you go through as a, as a child. But, um, so the next doctor that I went to, it was a form of conversion therapy, which is like, you know, I just can't imagine taking my kid to that. But what, for people who don't know what conversion therapy is what is that conversion therapy there's there's different uh i think severity levels of it but there's like conversion therapy camps where you can take your kids to to essentially pray the

gay way it's all religious based therapy um where you can do like physical exercises and emotional exercises to rid the kid of homosexuality. Um, my therapist was a psychiatrist, so he could, he could prescribe medication. Um, and so when I was 11, I was taken to this guy and, um, he just, you know, would sit me down and teach me ways to, uh, suppress those gay thoughts, um, all in the name of Jesus. And so the thing that stuck with me for the longest was, um, you can think about robbing the bank. That's not a sin, but to rob the bank is the sin so he would pretty much say you know you can think about these perverted thoughts which who anything woman on woman idolizing another woman or lusting over another woman is perversion if you're a woman same with men on men to him so um he would just talk about you know know, you can think about it,

like, just let it be in your head. God's not going to judge you for what's in your head, but you never act on it. And then terrible to tell a child that you're already going through, um, you know, obsessive compulsive disorder. And now you're being told, yes, you can think these thoughts, but you just can't act on them. Right. It's like dangling a carrot in front of a, you know, a rabbit. Right. And my obsessive compulsive only got worse of course because you're suppressing so much stuff and just pushing down how you're really feeling right and then uh later a couple of appointments later i was then put on zoloft at the age of 11 to just zonk you out i guess if you're zonked out, you can't really have any thoughts

or you don't care about how many times you touch the fucking doorknob. We're not laughing at people who take Zoloft. No, no, no, I get it. I get it. That was me though. I was put on zoloft and yeah i mean it helped i mean i i guess you know if i shot a couple of glasses of whiskey i wouldn't want to touch the doorknob that much right yeah whenever i drank my ocd disappeared because i was shit face so that's why i was a fucking binge drinker for 20 years but right it's a whole nother story so you're 12 years old 11 11 and they put you on Zoloft. How are you, how's your relationship with your parents right now? Like,

are you starting to resent them or do you, are you still in that mode where like what mom and dad say is right? Um, so I don't have a relationship with my mom. I haven't for going on since 2018. So it's been about five years. Um, whenevery and i got together that she was like she was my second um she was my third relationship with a woman i had a relationship for the first time when i was 18 so i fucking robbed the bank when i was 18 i went in there you're like guns blazing you know was that your first oh yeah that was your first that was my first um through this although you were playing softball right and like yeah because i did see that you were like a softball star which is like you know just living in a chronic gay club all right yeah like mom i was the shortstop on a

softball team okay like you had to have had a inkling about this yeah i think mom's in denial oh 100 so i haven't spoke to her in five years. My dad and I have the best relationship. He's my ride or die. My dad holds, which I've tried to release this for him just through conversation. But my dad holds a lot of guilt about that. But him and I, we have climbed that mountain together. And I would go through it again if it led me back to the relationship I have with him now, because it's so strong. He understands me. He has so much

empathy for me. And at the end of the day, I just asked him, why would you let your little girl go through that? And he just said, baby, I thought I was protecting you. He's like, you know, I wanted you to make this decision when you were older. And I didn't want you to have to go to elementary school or middle school in the deep south of Alabama, where there's just mostly country white folk and have to live through that i would rather you be able to hurt and suppress suppress that as a child so you don't have to deal with outside opinions and then move move on from that so i get it how was that going to school and knowing that you were did you ever date any boys yeah i tried to yeah i tried to i mean me trying to date a boy yeah i did who i did i dated this one boy for i think a year and then i dated another guy for three years maybe god it was so awkward three years yeah i mean you were really hanging in there girl you were trying to convince yourself. That's what was happening, right? The last day before we ended it was the summer before I was going to Alabama to play softball.

And this is like the most Alabama redneck story ever. But he was like, he called me on the phone. His name was Jesse. Jesse. Jesse. He said, hi, baby. Does he have chew in his mouth? Yes. I can hear the chew have chew in his mouth? Yes.

I can hear the chew. I can hear it. Yeah, chew in his mouth in a big old lifted pahoe. Oh, no. And he said, hey, baby, can you come over to the farm? It's like 11 o'clock at night. He's like, I got to talk to you about something. He's been eating at me.

Oh. And I was like, okay. Jesse knew. Jesse knew. I said, well, I'll come over. And I was like, okay. Jesse knew. Jesse knew. I said, well, I'll come over there in a little bit, Jesse. So I met him over there, and we were sitting out on his tailgate in the cow pasture. I mean, like, y'all doesn't get any funnier than that. And I said, well, what's wrong, Jesse?

He said, I just got this feeling that when you go off to University of Alabama, you're going to find a girl you like more than me. I was like, oh, damn. I said, Jessie, I am not a lesbian. What are you talking about? I cannot believe you would accuse me of being a lesbian. You know, like I'm trying so hard to like give off this, this straight persona. Tell me Jessie's DM'd you since then.

I've been like, no, he hasn't, but his wife follows me on Tik TOK, which is hilarious, which is hilarious. So, uh, yeah, no, that was, I should have, you know, just cut, cut ties with him for his own sake. So he could have went back and tried to, that's a good man though. At least he was like, you know what, Let's call a spade a spade. Like we know what's going on here. He really was a good guy. And I think that, I think he probably knew. But I think he really did like me because I think I'm not, this sounds so conceited, but I think that to like every straight guy, minus the fact that I'm not very girly, I think I'm like every straight guy's dream because I'll go not very girly I think I'm like every straight

guy's dream because I'll go hunting with you I'll go fishing with you yeah I'll play basketball with you oh no you're their dream I'll beat your ass on the golf course my husband has a thing for lesbian women he loves them he's just like I just love them like Jesse Lawless is right up his alley we had we had a friend named Rochi we used to make her flash her tits all the time because you guys always have the best racks dude like it's oh I made Jessie flash her tits when she was here I miss that department money I don't think Straight dudes love lesbian women

Because it's like a fantasy Or a kink I don't know One or the other So you went to college Did you break up with Jessie? Or did you cheat on jesse jesse cheated on me jesse you son of a bitch you son of a bitch jesse we were liking you jesse i'll give

him a pass though okay because um i i think he knew the end was coming so he's just trying to get ahead of it right he's just trying to get ahead of it but yeah i had to get over somebody got to get under somebody else that that whole 100 yeah 100 so uh but no i had my first girlfriend when i was 18 i went to college in august and i think uh we started dating in october so it's like you know three months so how was that though were you finally just like finally i get to be myself or no were you still con you were still no it was just i think i chose the wrong person damn it i think i chose the wrong person to pop that cherry with but we've all got to kiss a lot of frogs yeah princess but i learned a lot in that relationship i i learned how to navigate through shame i wasn't the best at it i didn didn't fully overcome that. Um, I think I'm still overcoming that

childhood shame that was instilled in me, but it was the first time where I robbed the bank and was like, you know what? I'm here to live another day. Jesus still loves me. I can still talk to Jesus. My dad, I called him after the first time I ever hooked up with that girl. I called him on the phone. I tell my dad everything I love that so you and dad were already were you and mom's mom didn't know that I was gay uh I called my dad I had never spoke to him about being gay again after conversion type therapy and then I hooked up with this girl yeah it was a long time uh but uh yeah so I called my dad and I was like dad just hooked up with a girl he was like what and I was like, Dad, I just hooked up with a girl. And he was like, what?

And I was like, yes. I was like, oh, my God, Dad, I feel like I'm going to hell. I hooked up with a girl. And he was like, well, do you feel bad about it? And I was like, I don't know, Dad. I just feel really weird, Dad. Can't wait to do it again, Dad. I was like, I'm having some weird emotions, which now looking back, this would be like a straight person hooking up with the opposite

sex for the first time at the age of 14, going to first base or, you know, this was kind of like you're coming out 100%. This was my first time ever having that feeling of fireworks exploding when you're hooking up. Not too much though, right? Yeah. Yeah. No, honey. No, honey. No, no, no.

You're the whole thing. This is like a sparkler. I was waving a sparkler. A wet sparkler. A wet sparkler. Barely had a flame. There you go. Yeah.

Good. Yeah. So he was just like, well, you know, if you don't like it, don't keep doing it. And I was like. That was dad. That was dad's one fishing, fishing reel. You know. You didn't serve the stock.

No, she was my first girlfriend. And then we broke up after three and a half years, I think. You like to hold on. Yeah. Yeah. You're glutton for punishment. I'm a family woman. Yeah.

What can I say? I love that. Okay. Gotcha. Yeah. Yeah. You're glutton for punishment. I'm a family woman. Yeah. Okay. Gotcha. Um, yeah. So it took a while to actually, actually, you know, hook up someone. And that was the same sex as me. But all through college, you pretty much, you know, got to be who you were.

Yeah. You weren't having to hide anymore. Right. 100%. All in relationships. I am like the worst hookup person ever i've never had like a one night stand or i try to have them and every time they end up in relationships for fucking seven years i tried to do that with my husband he was like no bitch we're making a five

year plan yeah i'm like the oh i'm so i'm so bad at one like i'm so bad at one night stands i've never even had one that's how bad i am yeah you try but they just end up in relationships yeah so it's like I end up dating them for three and a half years and with this one though it was like no we're we are forever 100 I knew the moment I met her I literally the moment I had my first phone call with her it was so weird it's like euphoric I was like she's gonna be my wife I was like she's the hottest she's beautiful she's the hottest person I've ever been around like ever seen no she's gorgeous I looked wife. I was like, she's the hottest. She's the hottest person I've ever been around, like ever seen. No, she's gorgeous. I looked at her. I was like, damn, she can't, she can't. It's your time to shine. Let's talk about you. Where'd you grow up? Um, I grew up in orange County, California. Okay. So yes. Okay. So you guys have the same dynamic of Jay and I,

I'm from the West coast. I'm from Vegas. So yeah, I got me my little hillbilly over here too. I love it. So I, it's weird. Cause I always told my mom when I got me my little hillbilly over here too yeah I love it so I it's weird because I always told my mom when I was growing up that I was going to live in Tennessee and have a ranch I'm thinking when I was little saying that I was going to be with a cowboy you're manifesting yeah yeah so I'd be your hooker it's weird he'll be your Jesse yeah um it's weird because I grew up in California and grew up in orange county specifically but i didn't have your stereotypical orange county life like my mom is like a i don't know how to describe her like a hippie she's like a hippie but at the same time same time has like really

traditional values so and she's like accepting and loving but anyways um yeah i i grew up with three brothers my parents split up when i was five and my stepdad he was always present but i never had like a solid father figure that i could go to and like you know or feel shame from or anything like that um but growing up with three brothers i had to have tough skin for sure yeah for sure yeah and i was the second youngest i had had two older brothers, one younger. And I was just Miss Independent. Like, I would take no shit from nobody. And I think it was because my brothers, like,

always looked at me as, like, an equal. And then we grew up in Orange County, but wasn't affluent like all of my peers. Right. If that makes sense. Like all of the people that I was around had like this godly life experiences. Oh, for sure. Orange County is very ritzy.

Yeah. But my mom was so humble and she would like designer things, makeup, anything girly. Like my mom is the biggest tomboy. And it's funny because like I had to teach her how to put on makeup. You know? So, like, it was like I grew up with five, six boys in the house. And there was just me. But I've always been super independent.

And I remember I was 12, maybe 13. And my mom taught at my high school. And I would go over there walk over there after like middle school so she could take me home and the senior boys would always flirt with me and because I looked that like this when I was like in seventh grade well I had boobs like I was very mature that's hard yeah people don't talk about that though like when you're pretty you know top heavy or even have an ass on you at such a young age, you get sexualized by everybody. Yeah.

And it was. Adults, kids. Like, it's weird. It's a whole weird thing. And it was very strange for me because I'm just a little kid at that time. I was like, what, 12, 13? And I remember these boys making these comments, like sexualizing my body. And I'd be like, what is going on? You know? And these were like. Always my body and I'd be like what is going on you know

and these are like dudes who ruin it yeah and always there's just always a fucking thorn in our side yeah and then and then that made me feel very insecure about my body so I would always hide my chest always hide my body always like be very modest and I still am very modest but it was from like people always commenting on my body and my looks before even knowing my name you know and so that was like really hard to then understand like self-confidence self-worth and I remember my first boyfriend I was not my first but my first like solid relationship because you have boyfriends when you're like sixth grade and you like both parents one time yeah um but my solid like meet at the lockers yeah like or look at each other from across yeah it's like yeah we're dating yeah exactly but i remember

my first relation like solid relationship i was with him for three and a half years and i was a freshman in high school and he was a freshman or sophomore in college. Again. Hell no. So you like him older. Yeah. I would have beat your ass. Daddy issues 101. Yeah, exactly.

And I remember thinking like, oh, this is like, this is just what I'm supposed to do. If I look like this, this is who I'm supposed to date. You know, I'm supposed to like be in line. I'm supposed to act mature. I even had a job when I was like 13 you know I like played grown up since I was a young girl and birthday January 7th Capricorn that's why yeah I'm January 22nd yeah it's that fiery little energy um but I just remember in this relationship it was just like a thing that I thought I had to fulfill rather than a thing that made me feel good if that makes sense like I I don't I don't know how

to describe really my child I feel like I have a lot of holes in my childhood too because I just remember feeling like I was grown up at the time that I was like 12 and then I just felt grown up from then on you know you didn't really get a childhood yeah in in my own kind of mind you know like I played college softball I did all of the things that I guess any of my peers did but I just never felt that way right and when I was a I guess I'm really jumping around but when I was a junior in high school, my best friend made a move on me. And I was like, oh, hell yeah. Yeah.

I was like, not. I think that's when everybody has their first girl-girl experience is high school. Mine was when I was in kindergarten. But I was always ahead of the game, you know? But yeah, that's normally when you start fooling around. And because I was so independent i found like god by myself my mom never pushed religion on us she's a very like she can quote the bible back and forth right but she always was like you're gonna have a relationship with god whatever that looks like

to you like that yeah which i loved so much and i would go to church by myself and i would worship by myself and i like would have my relationship with god by myself. And so when I figured that I liked girls, it was like this internalized homophobia. And I was like, there's no way, Mandy. Like there's no way you can be like this because you've always been the pretty girl. You've always been the mature one. You've always been the one that all the boys like.

You've always been the girl, you know? Like you can't now be gay. So you didn't feel like you were into girls even as a child you just started noticing no in junior high after truly i just wasn't into people high school after you yeah i just wasn't into really people just like i fucking hate people right let's let's be real yeah because it was just like i wanted i wanted control of so much and I felt like I had control of like nothing because I just always felt grown up and boys gave me attention. So I was just like, okay. Yeah.

You know, like it was never like a, oh, let's go seek somebody out. Right, right, right. And that sounds so conceited, but I just truly, I was mature. And of course, if an eight-year-old boy sees a girl with 36 Ds, I'm like, yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. You know? Me crazy. Yeah, you know. Me too. I had that problem.

I'm off living with big boobs like this baby. Yeah. You just looked at her like you've never seen her. She was like, am I missing something? Yeah. I'm sorry. No, it's okay. So yeah, I just had extreme internalized homophobia because I was in Orange County.

People think that California is super open-minded. Yes, it is. But you also have this precedent that you have to be an OC girl. Right. And if you're blonde and pretty, you have to fall in line to looks before braids type of mentality. That was the hardest thing for me moving to Tennessee. And this isn't a diss towards Tennessee women at all because the women are beautiful but on the west coast women are so much more look obsessed than women are out here you know so when I first moved out here I used to always have my

hair my makeup done now I literally run around looking like a vagabond unless I have fucking podcasts you know whereas before I wouldn't I wouldn't even go to the grocery store without a fucking full face of makeup yeah it's like a whole different way of life out there yeah and it's and it is like the level of vanity made me feel like I had to be a part of whatever that is yeah um rather than like find my own individuality and like be proud of who I am and I felt like I had a lot of soul searching after high school when I went to college because I went to college in Seattle where Seattle anything goes yeah and so it's like so different even though it's like right above you know it's just so different yeah and my mom and I are very close and my mom was like do you like your best friend and I was like absolutely not why would I do that

you know internalized homophobia I'm like I'm a guy's girl like what are you talking about so I lied to her for a good stint and it finally she was just like Mandy stop yeah like you're this is ridiculous like stop like just own up to who you are I love you regardless but you doing this is creating so much more just chaos in your life and that was the moment in my life where I'm like it's not about my mom not loving me. It's about my mom not wanting me to hide who I am and being unapologetic. And I love that your mom's like that. That is so awesome. Same. Same. But I also, we grew up in a time where it was, you, you didn't see it on TV and stuff, of course. Right. Um, so on the softball field, it was like nobo lesbos and like dykes on spikes and like hearing all this commentary or just like, I don't want to be the dyke, you know, when I'm like, who cares?

Yeah. Who cares? Mandy and I, not to take up your space, but Mandy and I, we are very different than I think the media shows the LGBTQ community. Um, you know, I just. This is before the media shows the LGBTQ community you know I just this is before the media totally but I'm saying like now Mandy and I we don't lead with oh we're part of

the LGBTQ community or oh we're lesbians we just want to be Denae and Mandy and because we want people to see us for who we are and I think people are so pressed to be put in a box that they box themselves in. And that's what I felt like I was doing as a kid

because like I didn't fit in with anybody. Like I didn't fit in with like the eccentric people that like were doing their own thing. I didn't fit in with the OC housewives, but I was kind of in this middle place where like my identity was like by myself. Right. You know, and I, when I went to college and I told my mom, like, this is who I'm dating.

It's funny because I actually went to Seattle University and my girlfriend in high school went to University of Washington. So we like live 10 minutes away from each other. Just so happened that it worked out that way. And so I just, at that point was like, you know what? I'm not coming out. I refuse to come out because I don't feel like it's it's not because I wasn't going to be open about it because I refuse to feel like I need this coming out story when I'm 18 to tell people who I like.

I was like, I'm just telling people who I like. And so I have this Capricorn energy where I'm like, if you don't like me, like F off type of thing. But like, this is my life and I'm going to start taking control of it. And so when I went to college, I just started posting my girlfriend. Like everyone posted their boyfriend, you know, on, on Instagram. And I remember that like, that was my coming out. There was like a very bunny move. Yeah. I'm like, I'm not like,

why do we have to have this whole coming out process of me calling up my best friends? Hey, I have a girlfriend. And I just think you were just owning who you were. whole coming out process of me calling up my best friends yeah yeah I have a girlfriend yeah and I just think you were just owning who you were yeah whoever vibed with it vibed and if they didn't they could just fuck off yeah and so when I went to college and I just was somebody that had a girlfriend it wasn't oh well Mandy oh she's the gay one on the team it was just like oh she has a girlfriend and like that's what I aren't there lots of other gay girls on the side okay

yeah and um so yeah it's a it's a tinder fest out there just just bunches of lesbians yeah anyways um so in college i dated my girlfriend and then I got out of that relationship, started dating guys again and just figure out who I was. And people always ask, like, are you like a straight up lesbian? Like, who who do you like? And I'm like, why does it matter? Right. Why do I need a label? Yeah. Why do I need a label? Why do you actually care?

Yeah. And why do you why do I need to identify myself by the sexual pleasures i have i couldn't agree more yeah and so it just infuriates me with that we've gotten to a place where it's supposed to be all accepting and all inclusive and it's like oh but the boxes are tiny right but people will shame you if they don't agree unfortunately i think it comes a lot from within our community yeah our community wants us to identify as something so that we can cast our net out and show that there's a lot of us out there. But then if you don't identify as one thing or your angle with which how you speak or present yourself isn't going to, you know, cast all of your light and energy on the LGBTQ community, then they get upset with you. And it's like, wait a minute. I'm not not proud to be gay. Right. all of your light and energy on the LGBTQ community, then they get upset with you.

And it's like, wait a minute, I'm not proud to be gay. Right. But just like I'm a former softball player, I don't shake your hand and say, hey, I'm Danae. I won a national championship at the University of Alabama. Right. That's true. Like, who the fuck cares?

Right. You know what I mean? No, I'm saying like that. Which is impressive. I saw that whenever I Googled you. That's a huge part of my identity. I worked my ass off to do that. Yeah. But it's also this big of actually who I am as a person.

Right, absolutely. So I'm not going to shake your hand and be like, hey, I'm Danae. I'm a lesbian. This is my wife, Mandy. I'm just going to be like, hey, I'm Danae, and this is my wife, Mandy. Yeah. And that's why you don't see a ton of just you know yeah LGBTQ this LGBTQ that although we're proud of it it's not that we don't want to shove it down your throat it's a that's just not a label that we want

on us all the time I think you guys will reach more people by being who you guys are than just screaming LG, you know, be, let me pronounce it right. LGB. TQ. TQ. I always get it wrong. It's a whole sentence. LGB, TQ, instead of pushing that down people's throats.

You know, I think people would look at you guys as role models, you know, especially young girls that are coming up that are dealing with what you guys, you know, you guys both have two separate stories, but you know, either position can look at you guys and just be like you know what i think they're really fucking cool and i want to be like them i don't want to have to put a label on what i'm doing or tell people who i am if i don't want to you know so i think that what you guys are doing is amazing it's it's pretty wild because like that was obviously my story and when we met yeah let's get to when you guys polarizing how far into college were you guys we actually met after college what'd you guys go to college for let's talk about that really quick i went to college for telecommunications and film okay i went for pr

pr okay yeah it all goes hand in hand yeah maybe that's why i can't find any to do it so i um i'm i saw mandy on instagram back in 2016 she just popped up on my explorer page and i thought she was the most beautiful thing ever explore page on instagram yeah i'd love that but i was still in the closet yeah um i had never publicly come out my dad knew that i had girlfriends but my mother didn't know so when So when she was out, she was out at the University of Alabama, but not anywhere else. Yeah, like my teammates knew and stuff like that. When you moved back to your hometown, it was back in the closet. Yeah. I was living with my mom pursuing...

So our mom and dad divorced? Yes. Okay. Yeah, I was living with my mom pursuing real estate. She's a real estate agent, and I wanted to do real estate. So I was living in my hometown with my mom and I stumbled across Mandy's photo and I was like, oh my God, she's so hot. Yeah. And I was like, eh, I don't know. You guys are both hot. No, I appreciate that. I would like to be a fly on the wall. And that 1990s house that you guys are renovating.

the wall and that 1990s house that you guys are making steamy baby no i uh i just thought she was super beautiful and i didn't know if she was gay or not and i didn't know if she was like into women but i played softball so there was a yeah there was hope well you know she's at least been around some ladies so we'll see if she likes it but uh i followed her she didn't follow me back then i unfollowed her why didn't you she got in her feelings i didn't know who she was i was like okay like you know bunny i was you know you you said i was cute i wasn't all that cute back then uh i needed to you know have like a little bit of a glow up. I think we've all gone through glow ups. I needed the glow up and so I followed her back again. After the glow up?

No, girl. This was like two weeks later. You were like, I'm still thinking about this. I am not going to let her go that easy. When's your birthday today? Valentine's Day. Oh, you're an Aquarius. Okay, awesome. I'm an Aquarius. You're an Aquarius. Okay, awesome. I'm an Aquarius. You're an Aquarius.

Yes, I love that. So I was like, well, I'll follow her back. So I did. And finally, I guess I caught her attention. And she hit me with a follow. And she was commenting on my photos. And she was offended that I didn't give her more love back. How very Aquarius of you.

What could she have said to my my comments I think it was like I like your leggings it was bad it was bad uh thanks yeah thank you got them on Amazon yeah literally but she slid in and I was like okay when she slid in what did she say I think actually I laughed at one of her videos so then like it sent me like a laugh emoji so then i said something like it's go time yeah i think we were talking about like working out or something like i have no were you guys in the same city no okay birmingham alabama i was in california okay okay yeah gotcha yeah so um you know got like stretched out and i was like here we go sent her a couple of really stupid stuff back i i look back and i cringe but apparently she liked it well i'm also the person like either i'm going

to or i'm not right you know like and so when she was like flirting i guess she was like it was so bad i love you so much but you have so much more game as a married couple you got swag you have you have developed the most attractive swag but back then maybe we were talking about horses you said you like horses i was just trying to talk about what you want to talk about okay so she slid in um and she got drunk on new year's and was like hey just let you know i like you i'm like obviously yeah and um i actually told her i told her i was straight she said i said she's like what are you doing i was like well you just played hard to get i was like so what are you doing she's like i'm listening to sam hunt song and she goes he's so

hot i was like fuck off i don't even care i was like what i was like you know what i said every noodle is straight till you get them wet so that's all i'm gonna say you know what that's a pretty good fucking i validate that i would have been like swoon yeah like fine so she then was like i'm just kidding with you yeah meanwhile honey it was new year's and I was out partying and I went to my first ever gay club that night in Birmingham called the quest and if you've ever been to the quest it's like a porta potty with neon lights in it it's disgusting sounds like a good time this is what I was doing the first night we were talking sexy to each other

over the phone was I was like you guys exchanged numbers oh yeah it went from the wet noodle thing got the number i may have skipped a couple of parts but that's because it was on snapchat nobody wants to go back to snapchat yeah i'll tell you something if a woman ever came up to me now was like let me get your snapchat nope disgusting yeah it's like no i feel the same way but i didn't even know i was partying at, this gay club with a bunch of my friends and this guy comes up to me and he was like, and I was like, do I know you? And he's like, we went to high school together. So we took some photos together and partied for like two hours.

And then the next morning I wake up and I'm looking through my messages to see what kind of stupid stuff I've sent Mandy. Cause I was intoxicated. Yeah. Intoxicated. And I have all these messages from people. And they're like, Denae, why would you go out partying with that guy? And I'm like, why?

And they were sending me news articles. Apparently this dude had just murdered his kid and was out on. I just got goosebumps. Yes. And was out on however that works not parole but waiting for bond or whatever oh my I bonded out god yeah I was partying with his this murderer she calls me up being like hey guess who I was partying with last night I was like who are you again I was like what are you talking about and you're telling me this story and I was

like who are the people that you hang out with we had not even met in person yet I was like, what are you talking about? And you're telling me this story. And I was like, who are the people that you hang out with? We had not even met in person yet. I was like, babe, I promise you, this is not my crowd. This guy found me. I was with my old college friends that I went to college with. All of them were straight, but they were like, oh, Danae, you want to go to a gay bar? And I was like, yeah, sure.

And then this guy approached me. So I don't know if that was the universe saying, you know, like. Never go back to the porta potty with me online. Yeah, I don't know. Or Danae, don't you know, like never go back to the porta potty with me online. Yeah, I don't know. Or Denae, don't be dumb. Yeah. So then Mandy, I think. God, what if he was trying to like kill you?

Yeah. He just didn't even realize it. He dodged a bullet that night. Maybe. Maybe. That is crazy. Denae attracts some weirdos. I do.

You're so sweet and you trust everyone. It's terrible. I get. Obviously, she's kicking it with murderers but i think that was like the first time mandy was like wow she's really immature and i was and then the mother instinct and her kicked in and she's like let me go take care of her right exactly right i was like um if we're gonna do this i'm gonna fly to you right now yeah and no literally like two weeks later i flew and i And I was like, if we're going to actually talk more, I want to meet you.

Yeah. And we met. And then I was like, damn it. Aw. Damn it. Soon as you got in her energy, huh? Yeah. It was like instantaneously.

I was like, this is what love is. And I hate it because you live in Alabama. It's in his face right now. She said. Yeah. I guess the horse talk really did work. It did. But no, I gave up really.

I think it was the murder. Just added that flair, you know? I just gave up really immature energy at the beginning of our relationship because I had never been in a relationship I cared about. So when we got together, it was not only growing up different, but we were also in two different places in our life. Danae had just started her real estate career. She's still living with her mom or her parents.

And I had already lived in New York City and had a career in PR and marketing for interior designers and architects. I'd lived in Switzerland. I'd lived in Seattle. Very well-rounded. Yeah. And so I was like finding my place. And I had like a really great corporate job in

Orange County at the time and so when we met I was like what the hell am I getting myself into meanwhile I'm selling $80,000 houses out the middle of Alabama at least you're selling them you know it was yeah and so fast forward I was like after we met I was like I'm all in I don't know why in hell I am but I'm all in and so I moved to Alabama it just took a chance oh you moved to Bama you didn't move to Nashville first yeah no girl she went straight down yeah and that I had never been in the closet before but I was slammed shut into a closet so there was that was the year that we lived in Alabama was the hardest time in my life personally but also our relationship it was I had also never been around

people that knew experience of like conversion therapy or conversations where their parents didn't love them for x y and z or pushing different ideologies that jesus hates this person and jesus hates that person and so like that for me like it was so different because your mom yeah and it was eye opening and so when we were building our life in alabama i physically hurt so much because she had no idea what unconditional love was and I remember seeing this and I was like I'm gonna fucking fix this you know like I'm gonna I'm gonna make her feel it you know and I remember the first time we actually prior to me moving to Alabama because we had did long distance for like 10 months after the first time we met I um she had a very traumatic experience with religion

growing up and I had a good experience with religion in my spiritual you know relationship with God and the first time that we met I didn't make her but I asked her to watch a service with me and so like that was her first experience with God in a same-sex relationship being present and like that was the foundation of us kind of healing together. It felt like, just felt like, it just felt like a full circle moment in a way of God giving me his stamp of approval. Like I know you hurt really bad today as a kid, but I promise you you're right where you need to be.

Cause I, I had just at that point before I met Mandy through Instagram, which was so not like me. I've never sent anybody a flirtatious message. At least I don't think. Your soul. Yes, it came across. Yeah.

It just felt everything with Mandy and I's relationship has felt like a divine intervention. You know, you find this broken, broken, lost, shameful person living in Alabama. And you find this very mature, just full of abundance, ray of sunshine living in California. And God somehow manages to connect the dots and doesn't allow anything to get in the way of us coming together. Um, and I always say that Mandy is my saving grace because I'd hate to know where my life would be at had I not met, met Mandy. I just love you guys. This is so sweet. No,

this is like, this is amazing. She just, for the first time, I know my dad has unconditional love for me. I think it, what he, what he allowed to happen as a kid. Again, we've, we've walked through that, but for the first time in my life, Mandy just, she could have easily, she's so beautiful. She's so smart. She's so intelligent. She's so kind. She could have easily already found somebody that was in a great state that could have elevated her. And instead she saw this broken person and she saw some, whatever she saw in me, potential or what. That's you. She loves you. She just grabbed me and threw me a life raft and was like, climb aboard.

We're going to go through hell together in a gasoline suit. But when we come out on top, it's going to be the best thing we've ever done. You are deserving of love and you're deserving of her love. You know, she sees something in you that she just wants to consume. And you know, you guys both love each other. And when you love, it's how it was when I met Jay, I've never dated a big boy ever. And when I met him, I was like, that's mine. That's my, I'm a stick beside him. You know, like it's just, when you know, you know know like it's just when you know you know and it's it's not even anything that us physically can control it's literally a spiritual thing it's a spiritual level it's a soul contract that we had before we even came here you guys believe in that

stuff but i do no 100 can we talk about what happened with your mom? Was it the relationship with you guys that kind of pushed it? Yeah. You know, my, um, the edge, my mom, I try to have so much grace for her and so much empathy because I know that was her first time being a parent. And I know this is her first walk of life, at least in the body she's in today. And so I try to have a lot of grace with her, but you know, there comes a time where you do have to be selfish. Um, and unfortunately, you know, I hated that I can't have a relationship with my mom. My mom just uses a lot of religion to justify her hatred. And I was just reading through some text messages between her and I back in 2018. Because sometimes I can convince myself that I'm a bad daughter.

It's just that you're like, well, how can your own mother not want to have you in her life? Well, it must be you because no mother walks away from their kid. So, you know, I'll go back and read the messages and then I'll remind myself like, okay, it's clear as day tonight. You did everything you could. But I said to her in these text messages, I said, um, I worship a very loving God. I said, that's God loves all, you know, come as you are. He says, like, there's, there's nothing you could do where God could turn his back on you. I said, and I think you worship a very angry God and a very condemning God. The Jesus I worship hung out with hookers. So, right. You know, a hundred percent.

Yeah. And so everybody loves everybody. Jesus was a Capricorn too. And so everybody loves everybody. Jesus was a Capricorn too. But no, when, when I came to my mother and told her, I said, you know, I, I'm going to spend a weekend with this girl that I met online. She's my girlfriend. Cause Mandy and I were already calling each other girlfriends for you.

You just finally, at that point where it was just like, I just want to be honest. Yeah. Yeah. I just, I was cooking egg whites in the kitchen and she walked in and I said, she goes, what are you doing this weekend again? And I was like, now or never, baby. One, two, three. I'm going to go see my girlfriend. I rented an Airbnb on the lake. Uh, she drives a BMW. My mom was like, what? Uh, and I was just doing everything I could to try and make Mandy look really appealing. I was like, she's got a great job. She makes X amount of money. She drives a BMW. She lives in

Orange County. Like all these things that I felt like would lessen the blow. And so it was very weird, Bunny. Cause like at the beginning of our relationship, my mom was like, I'm not going to say she was on board, but she was very nice to Mandy. I'd bring Mandy around. She was very kind to Mandy. She would ask Mandy for, uh, decor advice for her home, how to do her hair, how to do her makeup. Like Mandy's the girl's girl. Right. And then I started posting some stuff on Instagram where it looked like we could have been in a relationship, but it wasn't very clear. And I remember my mom was like, you need to take those things down. People are going to get the wrong opinion. You know, the ladies in our real estate office are

going to talk. You need to take that down. And at first I was like, okay, well, you know, I'll just go light on the posting. And then I was like, no, no wait you're putting more shame on me now like you're you're just brick by brick you're adding more shame to me again and when I was grown at this point right I was 24 um and so when she thought I was being defiant it put a huge strain on us and it got to the point where my grandmother on her side sent me this huge packet in the mail to our apartment and I opened it up and I was on a walk by myself and I grabbed it and I opened it up and I'm like oh somebody sent me a gift you know I'm going through it and it's all these brochures and scripture of this local church to where they have rid yourself of homosexuality meetings. And it was from my grandmother.

And I just, I just broke down and I went and jumped in the car. It just gets to a point where it's mean. Yeah. You know, like you're literally, this is your child, you know,

and you're just trying to break her down as a human. And it hasn't worked since she was eight years old, you know? So why would you continue to keep trying to hurt your child? That is something within your mom that she needs to heal. Right. And, and I called her after I grabbed that package and I was bawling and I was like, why is she sending me this stuff? Like, why is she trying to hurt me? This is hurtful. Like you just just said and I just remember she said well honey you and Mandy are like alcoholics you're just addicted to each other and until you can break that addiction it's never going to go away you need to turn to the Lord

and I went home I wept like I'm never gonna get that picture out of my head I wept. I'm never going to get that picture out of my head. I wept. It was like. It was a release probably. A hundred percent. I had all this built up trauma in just every cell of my body. And I wept and I looked at Mandy and I said, we're moving. I don't know where. I said, let's move to Nashville.

And she was like, I think we need to be further away. She's like, let's, I said, let's go to California. And Mandy just looked at me and she's like, my little southern baby just wants to move to California holy shit yeah within a month later we had packed up and we were on the road to California and we moved to California to live there for two years how'd you like Cali I am a southern girl through and through so I need to be in the south but, it was like a two year vacation. I woke up every day without knowing a single soul out there. And I was able to dress the way I wanted to dress. I was able to kiss my girlfriend in public, hold my girlfriend's hand,

call her baby, you know, down the grocery aisle, babe, do you need this? And not be like, oh, fuck. You know, whereas like at home, I was like at the Piggly Wiggly and I was like, Mandy, what do you need? What do you need, Mandy? You know? And, and it was just like, oh, fuck. You know, whereas like at home, I was like at the Piggly Wiggly. And I was like, Mandy, what do you need? What do you need, Mandy? You know, and it was just like I could just breathe for the first time. So I love California in that sense. I'm not a West Coast girly. No, my husband, we tried to move him out to Vegas,

and he lasted six months. So he did better than he did. He's a Southern boy, and he just has to be in the South. So I get that. It's pretty wild to like hear our story still to this day i'm like we went through that like holy shit but at the same time a lot of people are like mandy how did you stick i'm like i don't think people understand how much i've learned about myself and about other people and about trauma and about empathy in the last six years and I think that Danae was put into my life because Capricorn very

very rigid boundaries very also my walls were as deep as a freaking bunker you know and so getting to know Danae getting to know her life and her light and then seeing how empathy could just really open you up and open your heart up to people it was like she was my saving the grace in the same way that I was hers you know she opened my bunker up yeah but then I also opened up hers you know and so I think a lot of people see our story they're like oh my gosh like that's so much trauma from like Denae's side of thing I'm like I was a culprit of my own you know shit that I was going through with my lack of dad and all of that stuff.

You guys both softened and healed together. It blows me away that we're here today in this state. Look at you guys now. When did you guys get on TikTok? Because everybody loves you guys. I got on at the beginning of 2021. So you're like me. You fought the system until we had to get on it i was like i'm not getting on tiktok yeah oh today i got on tiktok during the pandemic for probably four months and today goes delete that it's gonna ruin our lives

hey president trump came out and said that China is corrupting us. I was like, Mandy, you need to delete it. Yeah. And we were getting messages saying like somebody is going to embalm our house and all these crazy. And I'm like, oh, my God. Well, like people were sending us articles like they can track your house and blah, blah, blah.

And I was like, yeah, Mandy. Yeah. You got to delete it. So I do. It was like a new app. It came out of fucking nowhere and blew up out of nowhere. You know, so of course, I did. everybody was like one eye on it, you know? I was like, okay.

Bye. Yeah. It's been life changing. Like just in so many ways. I mean, I've always wanted to pursue a career in entertainment, like acting or comedy. And like, there's been doors open for that because of social media. And you're a funny motherfucker. I appreciate that.

I love it. Thank you. I appreciate that. So I'm just working really hard to stay authentic and not, I don't want to use the word sell out, but stay authentic in the abilities that I have without trying to be everything for everybody. Yeah. Well, I mean, being on, people don't realize that having the big followings that we do,

you hear so much shit all day long that you start to kind of question, like, who am I sometimes if you feed into it. So staying authentic is really what, you know, your power. Because everybody changes who they are because of so many outside opinions that are coming in all the time. Yeah, and I also feel like we've had a bit of a, I don't want to say luxury, but I do want to say luxury of getting on it when we're not 18. Right.

You know, like I cannot imagine being like 18 and blowing up and being like. They're babies. Yeah. Literally. And I'm so glad that we went through all of that and then grew the platform, you know, after all that rather than through it no oh my god no if i was on this listen if i was on tiktok in my 20s and 30s i would have been fucked i'd have been canceled 575 times there's literally no way yeah it's fucking beyond

there oh god i have poof now you know so i know how to like navigate the waters but before boy i did not no i did not need to have any sort of megaphone when i'm 18 right anything like you needed to put some duct tape over my mouth i was yeah yeah so thank god it's come at the time in our life where we are but yeah for sure so grateful for the platform especially for watching danae come out of our shell and just own who she is is like yeah people are always like like how does it feel you know or when Denae gets recognized I'm like I'm her biggest cheerleader I was her biggest cheerleader when she was in her closet like yeah I don't think people understand like her watching her pursue something that she's done since she was a little girl like she used to make homemade videos and then provide them for the audience of her family and like a lot of those videos would get

me canceled but like mom doesn't leak them yeah but yeah it is just it's so much fun and it's so much fun to be a part of and to watch flourish and i just love this space yeah like opportunities you know like we're right, getting to talk to you. I love it. You have just been such a light. The thing that, I'm not trying to be the interviewer now, but the thing that Mandy and I

just absolutely love about you is how you are on social media is 100% how you are in real life. Oh, I appreciate that. You are just such a genuine person and nowadays because of social media, you can have so many smoke and mirrors how you are in real life oh i appreciate that you're just such a genuine person and you nowadays because of social media you can have so many smoke and mirrors you can be whoever you want to be on social media that's crazy you know you could have a dollar to your name and and be a millionaire on

social media you could be 300 pounds and make yourself look like you're yeah you know a size zero on social media so it's like it's crazy it's crazy but you know, a size zero in social media. So it's like, it's crazy, but you do such a wonderful job of who you are in your life is who you are on social. Yeah, you have an absolutely beautiful spirit. I love you. Do you guys want to make out? Yeah.

I mean, I'm ready. So, you know, just let me know. My husband will not mind, trust me. We can turn this into a whole other type of video. Maybe we can put this on OnlyFans. Is that OnlyFans money? I have one.

Oh, yes. Yes, sir. I'll bring you guys on any time. Let's go. No, I always tell everybody I had to get everybody's attention with my clothes off

and now I make more money with my clothes on. Like, it's crazy. Love that. Are you guys going to start an OnlyFans? I'm not. You know,

I don't think I have the body for only fans. You know, I tried to get on feet finders for a while, but I saw my makeup artist just got on there. Pretty. What is it? Pretty feet. Pretty toes forever.

My username was long and skinny. Wait on feet finder. Oh my God. Are they long and skinny? at these they're size 11 i tried it out for two days i tried it out for two days and i was like i was getting emails to my email i'm like what the hell and i was like you know i just this doesn't bring me joy i think i don't understand the appeal of feet i've never guys like when you scrunch them too. Like what is that? I just,

we, I can't relate. We were actually getting messages that were like, can you do it in a different angle? They look a little too skinny. And I'm like, it's too skinny. There's no we in this.

I'm like, I don't have time. You can isolate that experience by yourself. I don't have time to reposition my feet. That's hilarious. That is so funny. I've never, I have yet to do the feet finder thing but i mean if i ever listen i won't pass up a dollar so come down i ain't about

it i'll do it too so they weren't paying any dollars yeah i need to steal somebody else's feet poor denise she's gonna you're gonna be sleeping she's gonna be taking pictures of your feet while you're asleep she's got beautiful feet y'all oh i bet asian feet right here i was gonna ask are you mixed yeah with japanese okay i love it yeah yeah very exotic you got an exotic yeah i got me an exotic bra there you go baby so that's the news king i'm just 100 he haul that's it i love it i love it so what is what can we look for in the next, you know, what's 2023 got in store for you guys? What you got in store, baby? You're the one that has things in store.

I am pursuing acting. I've wanted to act my entire life, but I'm dealing with a lot of other shit, bunny. Are you doing like stand-up comedy and stuff like that? I do stand-up comedy occasionally, but it's not what i want to pursue full time gotcha if you know opportunities present themselves like i have a couple of things lined up right now with stand up but i'm really picky with that because it's not it's not we could

probably plug you in at zany's yeah okay or like we're doing a podcast tour and i've been thinking about having like musicians or comedians come out before we, you know, do our show. So pick and choosing on things like that for cool opportunities, like you just said. But my main focus right now is I want to pursue acting. I want to get into, you know, television, especially like in the comedy realm. Yeah, it's going to happen. Thank you. Manifesting it right now.

Thank you so much. Yeah. What about you, babe? I'm in like this weird space of i feel like your supporting role um but we do it really thank you so much i i love social media i love creating i love fashion i actually just got a studio like set up for photography because i've always loved photography and i really want to shoot like kind of editorial shots for some weird reason probably just for me and i'll like maybe post some videos about it, but I think my creative outlet is supporting this chapter,

you know, and I, I love doing that, but I also, I know that that's going to open up more doors for both of us. Absolutely. I did that with Jay when we first got together, he was the main character and I literally was the supporting actor, just like you say. And it works out because, you know, you have two people pouring so much energy into a dream. It really does come to life. Yeah, I don't think that it would not necessarily be fair, but I don't think that Danae would feel as empowered to pursue what she was doing. If I was like, no, I'm going to go do this. 100%. That's what I was about to say. Growing up in a small town, the arts and stuff are not really celebrated and

Mandy has so I never really had people pushing me to do theater or drama or anything like that but Mandy god she's just so good at like saying you're so natural at that you're so good at that pursue it go take an acting class go join an acting studio and it's that it's that nudge of constantly just saying like you you've got this you're not too old to do this like no like go that is also another thing with uh denae's career that i didn't know i loved is i love writing like i love writing a lot of her skits and a lot of her comedy things and so that might be an avenue i go down whether that's writing scripts for tv or just like something like comedy skits or I don't know. Power couple. Yeah, I just I love to create and whatever I'm doing to create something from nothing is where I think my body and mind thrives the most.

And right now it's with Danae at the platform. I love it. I think you guys all your guys' dreams is going to come true. You guys, all you got to do, I tell my team all the time, just put it in the air. And literally the universe grabs it and makes it happen. You're never too old. I'm going to be 43 in how long?

When do I turn 43? Fucking three days, four days. Oh, right on. You're never too old. It took me until now to finally get everything I've worked hard for, for the past fucking five years. You know, really since I fucking left home at 14, but you're never too old. It took me until now to finally get everything I've worked hard for, for the past fucking five years. You know, well really since I fucking left home at 14,

but you're never too old. Don't ever let age limit you. You've never let anything limit you. So don't let it limit you now. Thank you for saying that. I really appreciate you standing beside her too. I'm pushing her. I think that you guys have a really beautiful relationship and I can't wait

to see where it goes. So you made it in, you made it in California for two years. How'd you make it to Nashville? Today you said we're getting a hell of a couple no we gotta go we were in a place to we were in a in the place that we wanted to finally buy something like we want to put some type of roots and make a financial investment into some type of real estate because we love real estate we love talking about portfolios and stuff like that but we were looking at real estate in california we're like if we are self-employed what the hell are we doing here and so we were looking at different areas florida texas we even

looked at colorado for a second we're like i can't breathe out there yeah i can't either i cannot my lungs hurt after two days of being there absolutely and i don't drive a super route so and wear a north face right and i don't really enjoy like climbing the mountains and looking elk all day you can't really climb because you can't breathe out there i don't know how people live amen like it's a great vacation spot for all you coloradians out there 24 hours yeah so we were looking at places to buy and we visited austin texas because we just heard so many great things about austin texas we went there uh really oh yeah and we i love texas i love like the the texans that love texas i love that oh yeah

proud texan yeah so we went to austin and visited and by day two or three we signed a contract to build a house we were just like let's just do this i don't know why and then we just were desperate to get out of california so then we lived there for exactly 18 months and mandy's parents had put in our ear that they were excited to move to nashville and i said well my parents lived two hours down the road so we've always we Denae needs to be in the South. So we always knew we were going to come back more to the Southern roots of Denae. We just didn't know when that was going to be the right time. And then when we lived in Austin,

our house did so well because we bought it in 2019 and sold it in 2021. And then moved here and then ended up buying the house that we have here. And it was, like I said at the beginning, it was always my dream to live in Tennessee for some weird reason. I have no idea. I think it was because I was listening to some country music that talked about Tennessee probably. No, it was probably manifested that as a child.

And I love it here. No, it literally, it took me a long time to say fuck the West Coast. But I, whenever we go back, I'm always like, I can't wait to fucking get home. child and I love it here no it literally it took me a long time to say fuck the west coast but I whenever we go back I'm always like I can't wait to fucking get home yeah my husband's like we just bought a fucking house here what are you talking about you know yeah and it's it's crazy because like the west coast it is amazing like the the culture and so much about it is so incredible but there's also a flip side exactly and then here i always tell people they're like how do you like it i'm like it's like a warm hug it's peaceful like it is so peaceful it's not so

filled with vanity there's relationships that actually care i'm allowed to talk to my neighbor you know and that's a weird concept to me i sort of got weird my husband and i laugh all the time because when he moved to vegas he would go and talk to all the neighbors and i'm like why are you doing that yeah like stop yeah like stop talking to the neighbors we don't do that she did that too and i was like what are you doing yeah no same like it's such a it's a culture shock i didn't even i had never even seen what are those glow bugs the glitter bugs what are they called lightning but they call them something else too right fireflies yeah i'd never seen a firefly until I moved out. I was like, what the fuck is flying in the air?

Am I high? What's going on? My husband's like, no, baby. They're fucking fireflies. We have some of the same things. Because when are they out? I think like the summer. So they were like going over the little green space in our house here in Tennessee.

And they were all like lighting like a freaking movie. And I grabbed my phone. Dude, it was so beautiful, right? Yeah, beautiful right I was like this is so incredible I didn't know that these were real and I was like what are you doing what are you doing those are lightning bugs she was like what's a lightning yeah yeah I still won't call them lightning bugs I'm like yeah they're it's the it's the politically correct way to say it for us uh west coast people I guess right well thank you guys so much for being here. Why don't you shout out your socials so that people can find you? Absolutely.

So my TikTok is Danae Hayes and my Instagram is Danae.Hayes. H-A-Y-S, no E. Yeah. And I'm Mandy Kai, M-A-N-D-I-E-K-A-I-I on both Instagram and TikTok. And then we have a shared YouTube. Mandy and Danae. Cute. Yeah.

Yay, we love it. Well, you guys have to promise me that you'll come back in like a year. We absolutely will. We'll be back with you guys. Absolutely. Thank you so much. Thank you so much.

Thank you guys for tuning in to another episode of Dumb Blonde. I will see you guys next week. Bye. What's up, guys? Don't forget to sub to Patreon so that you can see the visuals because not only do we have episodes of the podcast we have exclusive content that nobody else sees on any other apps

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