Dumb Blonde - Moonshine Bandits on How They Like Their Bourbon and Groupies

Episode Date: October 12, 2022

Bunnie becomes a shiner this week as she welcomes the sexiest duo in country rap, Dusty ‘Tex’ Dahlgren and Brett ‘Bird' Brooks, also known as Moonshine Bandits. She first talks about how Bird and Tex are responsible for her and Jelly getting together, and gets them to spill about what really goes on backstage at their shows. Tex and Bird give the rundown on how they toured and built up their fan base without an album, their advice for younger artists, and why you need to try their new Bucked Up Whiskey. The guys also get real about their pride for Americans and gratitude for those who have served. Bunnie: Website  Moonshine Bandits: Website   Bucked Up Whiskey  Watch Full Episodes & More: www.dumbblondeunrated.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I don't care what anybody says. It doesn't matter what time of year it is. I never get tired of online shopping, especially during the holidays. Here's the thing, it's kind of gross out. Even those of us that embrace the chilly weather need something to break up long winter nights. Something I love to do is treat myself to a little something,

but I don't want to spend a fortune on my winter blues. That's where Quince comes in. I'm absolutely obsessed with my Quince luggages. I took them on tour, I brought them home, and they're still like brand new. I'm pretty much obsessed with this brand, but there is something else that everyone needs in their closet. In my opinion, Quince's iconic Mongolian cashmere sweaters, which start at $50. Or if you want to really up the lux factor, check out their Italian leather leather handbags washable silk skirts and european linen sheet sets whatever you're looking for all quince items are priced 50 to 80 percent less than similar

brands quince only works with factories that use safe ethical and responsible manufacturing practices treat yourself this winter without the luxury price tag go to quince.com slash b-u-n-n-i-e for 365 day returns plus free shipping on your order that's q-u-i-n-c-e.com slash bunny b-u-n-n-i-e to get free shipping and 365 day returns quince.com slash bunny all right guys it's a new year and you know what that means out with the old and with the new but i do got to say one thing I will be bringing old with me into the new year. Lume whole body deodorant is the bee's knees, baby. I know when I go out on New Year's Eve and I'm running around like a chicken with my head cut off, I don't have to worry about sweating or smelling. Because why? I got Lume on. Clinically proven to block odor all day and control odor for up to 72 hours. All Lume products are baking soda free,

paraben free, and pH balanced for safe use below the waist. As a special offer, new customers get 15% off all Lume products with our exclusive code. Use code bunny XO at lumedeodorant.com. That's L-U-M-E-D-E-O-D-O-R-A-N-T.com. Lume's solid deodorant stick is formulated and powered by mandelic acid to stop odor before it starts. It also provides 72-hour odor and sweat control for pits, privates, and beyond. Lume's starter pack is perfect for new customers. It comes with a solid stick deodorant, cream tube deodorant, two free products of your choice like a mini body wash and deodorant wipes, and free shipping. two free products of your choice, like a mini body wash and deodorant wipes, and free shipping. Once again, as a special offer for listeners, new customers get 15% off all Lumi products with our exclusive code. And if you combine the 15% off with the already discounted starter pack, that

equals over 40% off their starter pack. That's code bunnyxo at l-u-m-e-d-e-o-d-o-r-a-n-t.com for 15% off your first purchase. Please support our show and tell them we sent you. Smell fresher, stay drier, and boost your confidence from head to toe with Lumi. Is this thing on? All right, gentlemen, coming to main stage next, this is Bunny. Get up there. She's got a tornado of titties coming your way.

Get those dollar bills ready. She's got an ass that shakes like Michael J. Fox so get up there and throw throw throw them dollars dude that is fucking iconic what's up you sexy motherfuckers welcome to another episode of dumb blonde today it's shiner nation baby i got the moonshine bandits on the podcast and i am fucking stoked happy to be here thanks for having us dude i'm so happy you guys are here so a little fun fact i did some uh date researches last night do you know that jay and i met at you guys's show august 21st at lvcs that was the first time we ever met really so you guys are responsible for jelly and bunny well we're responsible for a lot of uh relationships and a lot of breakups

that's all there's always you got to take the good with the bad, right? That's great. My brother, my brother and his wife actually met at one of our very first shows way back in the central Valley in California. Long time ago. I love that.

So you guys are just bringing, bringing love together and you're there, you're there in the beginning and you're there in the end. Right, right, right. That's all that matters. What are you guys doing out here in Vegas right now?

Go ahead, bro. Well, we came out here to see you and do the podcast tomorrow we're at we're gonna be at hogs and heifer saloon um we're actually do debuting our brand new bucked up bourbon that's uh just came out and it's delicious it's very very good in fact on that note yeah so we got a square black carpet event tomorrow very cool you guys are doing the hair of the dog right Delicious. It's very, very good. In fact, on that note, I'm getting a little squirt of it. Yeah, so we got a black carpet event tomorrow. Very cool. You guys are doing the hair of the dog right now. I heard you guys were hungover. A little rough. A little rough last night. Had a little go. Flight was all screwed up coming in from Nashville.

Just get lit and turn it into a fucking party. Right. So I did a lot of research last night. I normally don't research my guests before they come on, but I got sweated by Gangsta boo fucking last week oh really because i didn't know the fucking name of her album like i knew everything else but didn't know the name of her album and she fucking lost her shit so i was like you know what let me just fucking make some notes here so i researched you guys last night and i watched a couple of you guys's interviews and i was just like you know

what people don't really know everything about you guys. Like there's always like bits and pieces in the interviews, but there's not like one solid interview where people can find out everything. And I kind of want to be that interview with you guys. Let's do it. All right. So let's start from the beginning. I heard that you're the preacher's son, right?

I am. And you came from a big Italian family. That's right. All right. So where did you grow up? So I grew up kind of around the country. I was born in Hollister, California. And my parents started a church in Lubbock, Texas.

Yeah. And my dad was in the forestry in California. He was actually the youngest fire captain ever in the state back in the day. And he left that to serve serve the Lord and so we went to Lubbock Texas and that's my from my earliest childhood was there then I wound up in northeast Mississippi where kind of that's where I got my roots so you were born in Cali but then ended up in Texas like that's wild and then Mississippi and like it was everywhere was he was a pastor at a church

and then went on down that line and wound up in mississippi my grandparents are out there aunts and uncles cousins and all that and then we moved back to california um so like i was in seventh grade eighth grade when i got back to cali were you happy to get back there like fucking a i don't you know i i was a kid so i mean everything to me was fun. Right. I mean, like it was it was it was kind of a crazy upbringing, you know. Yeah. Everybody has challenges with their families and stuff. Pentecostal. I was raised Pentecostal. And there's not a lot of money in preaching, especially in Mississippi. Yeah. Like the 80s and 90s. So, I mean, it was tough, but my family got by.

And yeah, it's cool. Once we got back to Cali, started going to school, and that's when I kind of met Dusty and his cousin. And, like, we started rapping and, like, parties out in the country and stuff. Was your nickname always Bird? Yeah. So when I moved from Mississippi to Cali, I was playing Little League baseball, and I had such a little redneck accent that the coaches were like,

what's your name? And I'd say, Barrett. And they thought I was saying Bert. And so they started calling me Bertie. And so like, since I was like 12, I've had that name. So like, and it just,

Bertie just rolled into Bert. I love that. Let's get a little backdrop on your childhood. Yeah, I grew up in Los Banos, California. Shout out through 209. Born and raised Cali. So you're West Coast through and through. Yep, always will be. I'll probably get a condo in Florida, but I love Cali. Just grew up in a little small town, an hour north of Fresno. And every weekend we'd go to my grandparents' house and it was party, party, party.

Big Italian family yelling, arguing, you know, wake up the next morning and apologize. And that's how it was every weekend. That's real family though. It's just crazy. Not my family, but that's real family. Yeah. My family is so fucking dysfunctional.

Big meals and just, you know, drinking, drinking and partying, dancing, singing. And that was my childhood, that. And, you know, drinking, drinking and partying, dancing, singing. And that was my childhood, that. And, you know, like you said, high school we'd start rapping at these canal bank parties or shop parties. We grew up with a lot of farm boys. Gotcha. They had these destinations where you'd just go out there middle of the night and just, you know. Like pasture parties and shit like that?

Yeah. I've been to one of those, believe it or not. I don't know how the fuck I ended up there, but I was there. Filled parties before they were filled parties. Yeah. Pretty much. So did you guys always have music,

um, instilled in you as children? Like, were you guys, me, mine, mine was more, sorry to cut you off,

but mine was just more of like entertainment. Right. Uh, like you get up and just sing with your family, have a good time. Right. That was my upbringing. His is more church. Yeah. church yeah mine was mine was church i sang in church and uh my mom like led the choir my dad played guitar stuff like that my mom played the piano

dad played the guitar they both sang my mom's got an angel voice oh shout out to you mom shout out mom but i'm still pissed off at my mom and dad for never teaching me how to play their instruments they knew. And I grew up in a household where my mom played the piano and my dad played the guitar. And I didn't know shit from any of that. In my household, my mom was just with the wooden spoons. Yeah. That's that Italian. That was the microphone.

Yeah, we still do that. Anything you can grab out of that kitchen utensil bucket, right? That's what I started singing with. We used have a the board of education when i was growing up it was a board that i got spanked with whenever i was in trouble it was fucking bullshit um so you moved back to cali right and you were already there where did you guys meet and how old were you sophomore high school yeah you're a sophomore i wasore, high school? Yeah, you were a sophomore. I was a freshman in high school. So I was best friends with his cousin, Danny Ramos. And so we all knew each other from hanging out, you know.

So he was just a grade above me in high school. Right. But, you know, we just kind of started clicking with music. We kind of were in the same crew and a couple of the guys like DJ Stuff and one of our buddies, atomic, he used to always get his hands on new music. Right.

So I remember when he let us hear devil without a cause from kid rock that, that record. And it was like, man, what the fuck is that record is iconic. We didn't know what that shit was. And that was before I think Bob did, um,

the, the new year's Eve party where he mixed ACDC with, I can't remember what it was. It was Run DMC or something like that. And he mixed it and people were blowing the fuck out of it. Man, that was dope. No, I remember that album. We were around those kind of people.

So we were on that leading edge of finding out new music and it kind of inspired us i think to kind of get going with it you know so just straight out the gate you guys wanted to be rappers or was it like i want to be a singer or i want to be a mixture because you know how some people it takes them a minute to find their sound right i don't know man it's like our sound was like organic from the gate it was was, we were listening to, I listened to, you know, Beastie Boys, Licensed to Ill. And next day I'm listening to Credence. So it was pretty much just. And I grew up on everything from the gospel to country to, you know, ACDC to Guns N' Roses to all, all of that, you know?

And I think our music from the beginning, even if you go back and listen to it, you don't have to. Yeah, please don't. Don't have to. Soggy Crackers. Don't listen to that. There's even a scene before that, but let's not go there. I love the name of that album, the 2003 one, Soggy Crackers.

I was like, that is fucking hilarious. But I mean, if we hadn't have did that, we wouldn't have been able to be on the path that helped us find ourselves and our sound. Oh, absolutely. Yeah absolutely yeah not everybody so if you go back and listen to that we still are today that same crew just fine-tuned it's just yeah yeah we figured it out you know and like i've got away a lot from the rapping because i love to sing i'd rather i'd rather sing and like like with jelly man when i i didn't i remember when dusty let me hear him uh when he did the marshall tucker you know can't you see song i was like mother fucker that kid got pipes and like i

i aspire to be a singer like that and i'm i admire him i look up to his voice you know for sure he loves you guys he looks up to you guys a lot hell of a dude he called me before you guys even got here he's like are they there yet We've had some good times together. No, I could only imagine. So how did the name Moonshine Bandits come into play? Were you guys always Moonshine Bandits or did you have to try on a few names? No, that's been the name. That's legit though, because most people go through a phase where they, you know, like I said, finding their sound, but also have to find their name too.

So my great grandfather was in Half Moon Bay, and he was bootlegging liquor during Prohibition. And he would use my great-aunt and my nanny to peddle the liquor. Basically, they would use baby carriages, put the booze in there, and then they'd service politicians, law officials, and basically sold liquor illegally. So it kind of comes from that. They used to barbershop as the front.

Yeah. And so I think Moonshine kind of came from that a little bit. Right. We were alcoholics, too. We kind of wanted to have a fun kind of name as well. But with his grandfather and that heritage and that history, it just kind of name as well but with his grandfather you know in that heritage and that history it just kind of came up but i remember when we were we were really like hey we got to name ourselves we got to have a name right and i remember going through different stuff and like

when that came up i think dusty may have came up with it yeah and it was it stuck and it was like moonshine bandits i mean it's like and then it's like that's dope it's a cool name it's just unique and like people if they hear our name they're like we won't talk about all the ones we crossed off and can we hear one let's hear one come on you have to give me an exclusive brothers booze brothers that was bad the what the liquor what liquor legends oh my god that's hilarious i don't know it may have been't know. I'm just kind of spouting off. But Blues Brothers was one, I think. That's actually kind of catchy because of the Blues Brothers. And then it's two of you.

Yeah. We had a lot of trash. Yeah. There was two of them. That is so funny. So after you guys came up with the Moonshine Bandits, is that when you guys started recording music? Or what happens after this?

You guys had your little crew or whatever. Yeah. So what we did was that was back in the day where you're trying to get signed. So we recorded a demo and we're like, oh, we got four songs done. We're going to get signed and make millions. So we start sending that and everybody's like, oh, what the fuck are you guys doing?

Making country with rap? Oh, this is never going to work. And so we were like, okay, well, let's just start selling the demo. So we just sold the demo at a little mom and pop shop. Shout out to Fantasia Records. John. And he sold our record out of there, and we sold like 2,000. We're in a small town.

That's pretty fucking good. Hey, small town, four-song demo. I think we printed the shit out on Kinko's paper or something. Yeah, it was fucking whack, bro. It was crazy, but people bought it. From that, then we were just... Yeah, so we just started building on that. And I think...

We made it a full-length record. Yeah, we had a distribution deal, and then we ended up getting signed by SubNoise. Yeah, so were you guys signed the same... I'm sorry, I'm looking at my notes, too. I don't want you guys to think I'm ignoring you. When you guys were signed to SubNoise, were you guys signed during the era of the Cottonmouth Kings and all that

stuff too? Yeah. We actually had two contracts on the table. We had Average Joe's and we had SubNoise. Yeah. And at that time we felt like we need to still work on the West Coast and like blow up Cali and SubNoise had that. And so we,

we passed on Average joes and we signed with sub noise and then uh we immediately went on tour with big b and yeah i've met big b a few times he's a good guy mouth kings yeah shout out to big b he's the homie homie so like those guys too though but that whole era it was great for me and dusty to experience those bands because they were really you know well refined and they were at the height you know their career and learn from how they were branding themselves we learned right out the gate from kank icp and twisted how to brand right and like that insane clown posse is just a different level the way they brand themselves and it's crazy and then also too

but for for entertainment like we don't consider ourselves rappers or singers. We're entertainers. Yeah, you guys are a brand. We're there to provide people an escape from their shitty 9 to 5 jobs. We want them to leave our show smiling and happy, and they had a fucking good time. But we learned that. I got to pay tribute to Tech N9ne,

seeing him in Merced, California at the Manger Theater and watching him for the very first time. And like, holy shit, who is this dude this dude is ridiculous energy yeah shout out tech shout out travis yeah man i was i remember trap man i remember rolling travis to a bank way back in the day oh yeah i love travis that's what tech was out you know he was slinging he was slinging verses for like 600 bucks a verse i know know, we should have stocked up on a few. That's crazy, right? And just sat on them. I know, I know, we should have. So what was your, who was your first tour with? Subnoise was your first?

You know what? Our first tour was with RBL Posse from the Bay Area. Oh my God, there's a bluebird on my shoulder. Can I kill it? That was my shit back in the day. And we used to talk, man. We learned a lot on that tour. Yeah, it was pretty cool it was wild but that was crazy too because they came through our hometown and we went to the show and uh i met the manager of uh rbl posse the tour manager and they were

like man we need a place to kick it and i was like well i live just right over here you guys are welcome to come over and like i didn't realize I was going to be like 20 carloads. You know what I mean? Rolling in. Story life. It was crazy, but I got a chance to meet Chris Black Sea. And like, he was like, oh, yeah, my boy said you guys are into music. He was like, let me hear your stuff.

And we only had the four song demo. And I played it and they were vibing on it. They were like, they it they were like they never heard shit like that before so you guys went out on tour without even dropping a record you guys that's insane it's such a different um yeah you know from now it's like to how it was back then it's crazy but yeah we went with those dudes and uh they took care of us it was really cool because we were definitely out of our element everybody knew it and but they took care of us. It was really cool because we were definitely out of our element. Everybody knew it.

But they took care of us and we had a great response from people. You guys have a really good energy on stage. You guys draw people in and you make them feel good. I remember I hadn't heard of you guys until 2015 and all my girlfriends hit me up. They're like,

the Moonshine Bandits are coming to town. And I'm like, who? And they're like, dude, you guys got to see them. You have to come to the show and i was like okay cool so i actually went there with an ex of mine but um thank god for him because i would have never met jay you know yeah um so you guys signed with sub noise but wasn't there another offer that you guys had on the table i think i heard you guys talk about it was with average joes yeah was that was it average at that time yeah okay and then yeah i don't remember what happened hold on i'm looking right now let me scare average joes that was only when it was basically just colt ford and um i mean i think the lax were signed to him but they hadn't even cut a record yet we ended up signing with average joverage Joe's. Yeah. Average Joe's is out in Nashville, right? Yeah.

Aren't they out there? Yeah. We did after we dropped a record with SubNoise and then we did the co-record. Oh. Universal. Did you guys have something with Universal? We did. Yeah, we did. I told you guys I did my research. I forgot about that. You know what? That's old

school. That was Craig Ferguson with Bungalow. Wow. What did he do with that? So they were interested in signing us. And this is when, I hate to say this because it's showing our age, but this is when Eminem just popped with, hi, my name is Slim Shady. So it was big in colleges. That was a huge fraternity, I guess, kind of style. It was party songs.

Yeah. And we had already kind of created a buzz. We had a song licensed by MTV for one of their shows, and it kind of popped for us a little bit in the L.A. area, and we got invited down to Universal. And we had a guy at the time that was kind of behind us and was helping us out a little bit, and we went down there. And it just didn't work out the way it should have

worked out thank god it didn't thank god it didn't because they were trying to steer us one way yeah yeah record labels are demonic yeah they would have had us go and try to go in the vein of Eminem and be that type of a duo but like him and I'm glad it didn't work out because we we developed ourself and we it may have took us a lot longer to get where we're at, but we did it the right way. We earned every fucking stripe on our shoulder. Yeah, I know, for sure. That's exactly what my husband did, too.

He held out for the longest time because those record deals are fucking, like, literally, it's like, figuratively speaking, selling your soul. And you are literally selling your rights to everything. And they want to change who you are. They want to change your sound. They want to change your sound. They want to change your look. It's just crazy. And the same with reality shows.

Because we had this deal with Seacrest. And we started reading over the contract. And we're just like, fuck. We sign this. We're done. Yeah, like what can you really do? Oh, it was. They were trying to just.

What was the reality show going to be based about? It was based on us. It was our lives, our lifestyle, uh, our families, but it was, it was too clean.

I don't know if it was clean, but it was like, I mean, yeah, you would think that it would be pretty clean, but I mean, at the time. And then at the same time,

Smo got his show on A&E so that kind of put us in the back burner but we've had like multiple television things and I think before it's said and done we'll probably do more TV stuff it's fun to do it but it's a lot of work to do TV oh dude we just filmed our pilot

for Peacock we just got signed to do a reality show our shooting schedule is what? June till three and a half months of shooting we're about to start doing, dude. I want to kill myself right now. And those are long days. They're real long days. It's like 11 hours. It's crazy.

Yeah. No nap time. Yeah. None. None whatsoever. And I have to recharge and shit. So let's talk about the music. Who writes you guys a songs? Is it both of you or is it, do you guys have writers come in? Like, how does that work for you guys? Oh shit.

We've done it every way you could think of. It could be, you know, maybe I come up with the concept. He comes up with the hook. We've been in those sessions where you're with Nashville writers where it's real stuffy and we fucking leave i hate music row oh man they're a joke they have we've had some good times over like ira dean ira's yeah yeah just i mean a ton of different ways yeah i'm like burn county our production crew uh derwood black ty uh they're those guys have been with us since the beginning of the birth of Moonshot Bandits basically

so they've Derwood's came through with a ton of hooks and I mean he is a very very talented songwriter and singer and he's came up with a couple good concepts or Dusty would come up with a concept and Derwood would nail the hook so but

we do write I mean 90 90 probably of our material 80 to 90 we probably write about 90 argue 10 i couldn't imagine you guys are like brothers like literally you guys are like soulmates like when's your birthday october 19th so you're a scorpio libra libra scorpio cusp and you're a cancer so okay I'm a Libra. Libra Scorpio cusp, and you're a Cancer. So, okay, I got it. Yeah. It's actually a soulmate. We've been through it all for the Dallas.

We've been through it all. Well, we have gotten out of where, you know, life has got to be easier. You know what I mean? And we understand. Like, for instance, if we're going to do an album, and there's something he ain't feeling with me, then we just walk away from it.

If something I ain't feeling, we just walk away from it. it fuck it let's just do something where we're both going to collab and vibe vibe well and like we've kind of been taking that whole approach with everything that we're doing with our brand now it's like yeah if you're feeling it we're gonna do it if you're not feeling it fuck it we got others so many other options so many other spokes on the well you guys have been rocking such a fucking long time. It's kind of like a marriage, you know? Like you guys learn how to communicate with each other. Been here for 10 plus 10, probably do another 10. Ah, that's sweet though.

It's not very often that you find friendships like that, especially that last this long in the music industry because it's so full of snakes. There's a lot of these though. Yeah, oh yeah, for sure. But that's with anybody. Especially when you live on the road together for, you know,

I think our longest tour was three months with the rehab and you go through some shit when you're around the people. You know, I won't tour anymore. I put in fucking five years. This last tour, I told my husband, I was like,

I'm flying into the big dates. Like I'm a bougie bitch now. Like I'm not hitting the road anymore. It's like, I like the bus tours. We got one coming up this year. Can we talk about it? Let's talk about it.

Yeah. The Bucked Up Tour. Bucked Up Bourbon Tour. Yay. Bucked Up Whiskey Tour. But, you know, our bus tours are. When does it start? It starts April.

April. I think it's 20 dates or 20, 25 dates. I think it's going to be more. Yeah, it might be. But it's all West Coast. Awesome. Western U.S. But we're all getting back out to like Montana, Wyoming. dates or 20 i think it's gonna be more yeah but it's all west coast and awesome western u.s but we're all getting back out to like montana wyoming a lot of people in arizona are asking why you guys haven't been out there oh you know there's that's interesting because we play scottsdale and phoenix

a lot and then people be like when are you gonna play here and we're like bro we were there last night they do that to us too check your schedule well that's good pay attention facebook you can't even get everything out. On this tour, we're playing Flagstaff and Phoenix. Okay. Both those.

And we're playing the Museum Club in Flagstaff, which is fucking, it's really, really cool. Is it? Cool ass history there. So you guys excited about this tour?

Always. Yeah. I'm ready to get out there and fucking go. Yeah, make some more memories probably go to jail or something who knows i go to jail or something do you guys ever write a fucking sad song yeah because i listened to a bunch of shit last night and i just wanted to fucking shake my ass around my room like i was so excited and fucking titties flopping out and

everything yeah i was like if you notice if you notice all of our music videos are pretty much and fucking titties flopping out and everything. Hell yeah. Sheesh. Play one of those songs right now. If you notice, all of our music videos are pretty much fucking good time. Dude, they're just hot bitches everywhere. I was just like, God. Sex sells, bunny. I don't know if you know that or not. I'm trying to get views, guys.

I was going to wait until later, but can we talk about the amount of pussy that gets thrown at you guys? Because I put a fucking questionnaire up in my story yesterday, and every bitch on there was like, ask them if they want to have a male, male, female threesome. And I'm like, what the fuck? Like every one of them just wants to fuck you guys. It's crazy to me. I was like these fucking little sex icons, especially now that I lost some weight. You know, it's tough, man.

It's tough. How do you guys deal with the groupies on the road mine's mine's super easy i'm faithful i'm married to my wife she saved me from my world i love the way you talk about your wife absolutely and like i mean yeah we have our hard times our ups and downs but she fucking knew the crazy i was and she was able to be there for me and i need that in my life you know yeah like she really pulled me out of some dark dark areas of drugs and stuff like And she was able to be there for me. And I need that in my life. Oh, for sure. Yeah, you do. She really pulled me out of some dark areas of drugs and stuff like that. Being with an artist, as a wife of an artist, being with an artist is probably one of the hardest things and most rewarding things you'll do. Because you guys have to go to a dark place and tap into that creativity.

And sometimes it bleeds over into tour and stuff like that. So women, our job is to just make sure that you guys just stay even and sometimes it bleeds over on you know into tour and stuff like that so you know women as our job is to just make sure that you guys just stay even and try to keep you guys on the right i mean there's one thing as our wives have been able to help us with is like a lot of times when we get off stage we that's nobody fuck with us let's we're gonna call our ladies you know like sometimes we need that voice just to bring you back down just to come back down because like you know if not he does get out of control it's incredible the the experiences that you can have on stage and the emotions can be so high and so like passionate you know with with our

our patriotism to um you know, just the energy on the stage. And, like, their voice, my wife's voice can calm me down. Yeah, I've been with my wife since high school. So she's seen us where we were dirt, you know, dirt poor trying to take loans out from drug dealers, trying to just get money to keep it going. She's seen us want to quit. She's seen us fight.

She has a big shout out to Nikki because she's pushed us. Shout out to the wife. She's seen it all. She's seen us fight. So she has a big shot of Nikki because she's pushed. Yes. After the white scene, she's seen it all. Do you guys have open relationships or I don't like calling them open. I like calling them free because Jay and I have a thing where we have like a free relationship. Like when he's out on the road, if he wants to fuck somebody as long as I know, I don't think that will work out for me. I don't care. Yeah, I don't think that will work out for me. Me, me, me either.

I mean, if I'm in a strip club or if I'm signing titties or all that shit, she ain't tripping on that at all. Like, we signed this one girl's ass. I got to throw this story in there. Get it in there, bro. I've heard this story. I want to hear it again, though. It's good. Everybody needs to hear it.

So we're obviously faded after a show, and this chick's like, sign my ass. Sign my ass. So she pulls her pants down. I sign my name. Bird signs his name. Bird was a little more fucked up than me, and he signed bid, B-I-D. I forgot the R. So two months later, she shows up to her show again.

She pulls down her pants. Look, got your names tattooed on my ass. Bid and text. And she's just stuck with that she didn't realize that when she was sober like hey his name's bird put the r in there i don't know i want to hear the brantley gilbert story that you weren't allowed to tell because jay's about to go i don't know if i'm allowed to say that but jay's about to go on tour with brantley i think the brantley g Gilbert? I don't know. Yeah, when you guys both ate shrimp. I was like, if he's not going to tell it on that interview,

I want to hear it on ours. I can't wait to hear this story. God damn it, dude. I don't like to talk about pooping, but... Oh, I love it. Let's talk about it. Anything with buttholes, I'm all for. This is personal. This is real personal.

All right, we're doing this festival up in Nevada, this country festival, and Brantley doesn't know this, so hopefully he hears it. So anyway, they had this beautiful catering. I mean, some of these festivals, you get really, really good food and stuff like that. And, like, I remember going, we just got off stage, and I was in the bathroom. And this guy's in the bathroom next to me just going off.

Like, that kind of stuff. You know what I mean? And I'm like, damn, dude. And, like, I just thought, what the hell, you know? And then I hear this guy come in the door. Hold on. I don't think we're going to get that Brantley feature now. Keep going. Don't matter, bro. Ain't no we're going to get that Brantley feature now. Keep going.

Don't matter, bro. Ain't no sweat off my nuts. No, you guys keep going. And so I hear the door open. And this guy's like, yo, Brantley, you got to get out here. It's time to get on stage, bro. He's like, give me a minute. And I'm like, damn, dude, you had that bacon wrap asparagus too?

And he's like, yep. And then I didn't even see him leave but i heard him and so and then i was like i told you oh so it was brantley if i can drop him bombs he was right next to brad right next to me like battle shit you sunk my battle shit i cannot believe i'm saying that is so fucking funny forgive me lord but i'll tell you right right now though i told chopsticks we're sitting in a rig and and I'm like, you watch that guy. He's squirming on stage. It was fucked up because I feel bad.

I've been there before, and it's tough. You know, you got to play through this stuff. Oh, dude, we were doing that. You guys don't understand why you have to do it to be on stage sometimes. Oh, no, listen, we were in the... Right as soon as he was done with his last fucking song, that son of a bitch, they had the van ready for him to go to fly to the airport. He went right past the van, right?

Oh, no. Poor baby. Jay was playing a show in, I think, Philadelphia one time, and he looked over at me and just made these eyes. And I was like, what the fuck is happening? Like, are you okay? Like, what can I do? And he was like, you guys, I'm going to be right back.

And fucking ran off stage and like could not, there was no bathroom for him to get in because it was locked. Had to run out, nope, ran outside and shit in the bushes. And then I had to bring him fucking napkins. And then he just fucking went back on stage, killed it. And that was it. He did something to me once. Big B got big hands.

He did something to me once. Big B got big hands. I was sick as shit in Michigan, Grand Rapids. I remember I was just about to walk up on stage. I'm getting hyped up, getting up. I didn't even want to be there. I was so sick. Fuck, Brian's coming off stage.

Big B, good luck, bird. Went like that and just pulled me around. Oh, no. The intro song is going and I'm like, shit,. Good luck, Bird. Went like that and just pulled me around. Oh, no. The intro song is going and I'm like, shit, I just had to perform. Just having to shit the entire time. I did it. Performed the whole time. That is so funny. This is Up Close and Personal with the Moonshine Bandits.

Thanks for tuning in. Thanks, Bunny, for bringing all these shit stories out. I appreciate it. It's what I do, baby. It's what i do baby it's what i do yeah if you my my family will attest our family full of farters listen you guys i'm married to jelly okay this motherfucker he's got the bowels of a three-year-old he has to shit everywhere he goes he's a good this is cute he's a good catholic boy um so let's talk about you guys's brand you guys are like so much more than yeah artists it's insane i'm gonna pull some of this out yeah please do yeah we kind of our

stuff we kind of pride ourselves in like a lifestyle brand it's amazing that all the shit you guys have your hands in utensils yeah we got oh my god if you listen to our music like this is a we're bringing this so you guys can have it here thank you this is a apron you know it's got stuff for your you know barbecuing and all that stuff i think i read somewhere that you guys own a a bar and grill too or do you guys still okay that's a whole nother story that that was our most expensive hangover we ever had. Oh, fuck. I could only imagine. We got our jerky. Oh, my God. Thank you. Sorry about that.

This is the best jerky anybody will... You guys are fucking just like... It's crazy, the shit that you guys have. We've got seasoning. Oh, Jay's going to love that stuff. So we got... Shiner seasoning is great. Chicken, fish, vegetables, that kind of stuff.

Peach and pepper sauce. It's really good with pork. So you guys really did pay attention to ICP's playbook. This right here. You know what? This is a little bit. You've got a good story about cigars. Violent J and our jerky.

They're actually coming on the podcast. I would love to hear that. Can you bring this up? Yes. Just give them the jerky. Okay. All right. podcast i would love to hear that can you bring this up because i just give them the jerky okay all right just um put this out here like this you can see it all right this right here it's a violent j is crack this motherfucker loves this shit and we were out on tour uh with him i guess it was the mighty death pop tour that was i don't know yeah we weren't making much money on that run and right thank god he bought all of his jerky yeah man he saved us from merchandise every night his wife at the time she would come up and she would be like at the end of the show she's like hey um bird jay likes that jerky uh

could i get like 10 bags oh my god yeah and then like the next night he's like hey um yo we need 10 more bags he ain't fucking 10 bags of jerky that's something that just fingers at the end of the tour we had like 40 something bags left and and like i was like where are you guys going after this he's like oh we're going on vacation well she came up she's like hey we're going out out of the country and we want the rest of your jerky. We're going to clean you out. Yeah, I can't wait to try it. But so we had this in production for a while and the company kind of closed.

We got back into it again recently with Jerky Girl. Bulletproof jerky out of Southern California. And she helped reintroduce us to the company. They came back. And we didn't know that. So we were able to do it again, bring it back out a couple years ago or a year and a half ago. And I sent fucking Violent J a big-ass box of jerky to Psychopathic Records.

And pretty soon I get a text message from him. He was so fucked up. He must have been drunk or something. He was proud as a motherfucker getting that have been drunk or something. He was proud as a motherfucker getting that jerky. Big shout out to Violent J. Shout out, Violent J.

We love you guys. So who picks out all this stuff? Do you guys just say, hey, I want my own fucking seasoning. Hey, I want this. I want that.

And just make it? Or do you guys like, I don't know. Is it requested by the fans? I feel like we got a good relationship with their fans and we kind of know what they like. They like what we like. And we just, I don't know. Is it requested by the fans? I feel like we've got a good relationship with their fans, and we kind of know what they like.

They like what we like, and we just, I don't know. You guys probably fucking kill it in merch, dude. Yeah. Like all this stuff. We do pretty well. It's definitely, you know, when you tour, you've got your touring money, and you've got merchandise. And whatever you make touring, you should make that a merch or more.

Absolutely. And I look at it like this. Our brand is me and Dusty are the center, right? And if you look at it as a wagon wheel, right, with spokes going off, each thing is a spoke. Jerky is a spoke. Sauce is a spoke. Seasoning is a spoke.

Whiskey, you know know whatever it is merchandise shirts hats whatever whatever it could be touring digital royalties all that stuff is a spoke so the more spokes you have coming off that wheel the more avenues of income you got coming into your brand and like so when fucking covid or some other bullshit hits you have that residual you're not bankrupt you're able the wheel is still spinning because you have all these different ways to keep yourself going. So-

I love that. You just dropped some game right there. Artists need to pay attention. And Mimi, I need my own fucking jerky. What are we doing? This is my manager here. We got you. That is the one thing I want to share

to younger artists that are coming up. Yeah. Brand yourself. Yeah. Don't just pigeonhole. Know your brand. You've got to know who you are to put it out there. Yeah.

Don't just put out bullshit. Put out something that your consumers, your fan base is going to want to get behind. Yeah. Put out something that if you're talking to a certain demographic, put something out in that demographic. Right. So. Let's talk about this bar and grill that you said was another story. Yeah, I'll take the L on that.

Oh, no. I heard him giggle. He was like, over to you, friend. So, yeah, I'm the branding guy. So I thought, well, let's do a Shiner's Bar and Grill in our hometown. You know, we know everything about bars. We've been to every bar. Yeah.

We didn't know how to fucking run them. Yeah. I'll tell you that. When you open a bar, you can't go on tour for three months on day one. Oh. So that's exactly what happened. Ribbon cutting. We had a ribbon cutting.

We're like, oh, this is fucking great. You you know packed out for a week bar was just cracking well we go on the tour with i think it was rehab and we were gone for three months we couldn't oversee anything that was going on but then you got employees fucking patrons employees fucking employees oh man people taking food home for their kids and it's just ordering a ridiculous over excessive amounts of food and we were actually you can't even trust people like that to run something and we had great we had some great employees not all of them yeah but uh we were killing it too and it's just sucks that we weren't around to oversee the business yeah it's got to be. It's our own fault.

Well, that's all right. But look at everything else that you guys have been blessed with. So it's like you've got to win some and lose some. I would do it again. I wouldn't take the L for a loss. I'd take it for a learn. Yeah, absolutely. Everything's a learn.

I love that. Everything is a learn for sure. And if you don't fucking burn yourself, then how are you going to know the stove's hot? Exactly. You know? So you gotta, you have to get in there and like, that's,

that's the best way to become a better business person, better businessman anyways. But that's what we had to do with this podcast, dude, to get to where we are now. I had to do a whole bunch of fucking learning. It was not fun. Let's talk about music placement.

You guys just got placed on like tiger king and stuff like that like you guys are always about that getting placed in like the coolest things yeah how does how does that come about i've talked to i don't know i might be kevin zinger at sub noise for tiger king i know we got he's still are you guys still signed to them or homies though we're not yeah we're not signed to him but we're you know we had one with... Are you guys still signed to them? We're not. We're homies, though. We're not. Yeah, we're not signed to them, but we're still homies. Are you guys independent now?

Yeah. 100%, yeah. The last three albums. Aw. It's pretty good. Proud of you guys, because that's huge. And we still got good relationships

with our old labels, because we're still getting good checks, so we've got to be cool. We've got to be cool. We've got to be cool. And in this business, too, like, you know, we may have been not really taken, or we were 100% taken advantage of. Every artist was for a long time.

But you still maintain some type of civility, you know, and you've got to keep those lines of communication open. You don't ever want to burn a bridge, because you never know if you're going to be working with those guys down the road and you know they might not be in that label or they might be working in a different avenue with booking or marketing or something and like so it's just better to hey man shrug your shoulders and like you know we'll figure something out and keep it yeah no the music industry is so big yet so small right everybody knows everybody the

circles always collide like it's crazy it's similar like in the tv and films very very similar and a lot of those guys cross crossover too so how did it feel to you know what's the is the tiger king like the coolest thing you think you guys have gotten placed in or what is something that you guys think is the coolest uh i think, yeah, when our music video went to number one on CMT.com. That's huge. That was back when your fans had to vote you in. So they changed that whole shit because we fucked it up. Right.

Because it was, I think it was Taylor Swift, Toby Keith, and our fans were relentless. Yeah. It just went to number one, and then it went to TV on top five. And then it was number one or two on TV. They changed all that online voting tv on top five and that was number number one or two they changed all that online voting shit after that so that was that was pretty cool that was great and like that that song was called my kind of country and it was like a song that was just about where we're from you know central california and you know showing people that there is country

on the west coast yeah you know and like because when cause when you think of Cali, you think of LA, you think of the Bay area, maybe Sacramento, but you don't really know that the whole state is, it's a giant fucking state, you know? And like where we're, where we're from is we just try to highlight that, show that. And like, I think that's why people got behind it so well, you know, and the message was about nine to five blue collar, you know, America.

Do you feel like um speaking about like being open about your patriotism and stuff like that it's such a hot topic now it's like hit or miss with the industry like either people are gonna embrace it or they're gonna like hate you for it you know like adam calhoun's had to go through you know both sides of it do you guys feel like it's helped you in a way or do you guys feel like it's hindered you in a way? I think we just always been true to ourselves. I mean, we had a, we have had our nonprofit for five years now. We, you know, we ship. You want to shout out your nonprofit? Yeah. Yeah. OPC operation packing company. We got a lot of great volunteers and, you know, we do about 75 boxes to soldiers overseas every month and got a lot of good people helping us out

with that and uh you know we've just been true of where we stand yeah right our values are our values so yeah it's like if you don't like it well suck it while it's soft yeah being being being proud of being american is not a platform for us that's just it's bread that's bread and it should be into every american yeah for sure live in the greatest country that has the greatest opportunity for every person. Absolutely. It's hard to see what's going on with our country right now. It really is. It's heartbreaking.

That's why it's like I'm ready to get back on the road because so many people want to get away from that. They want to just turn their fucking TV off, come out to a show, let loose. Just have fun. And forget about the news for the day, you know? Yeah. So, but we are very proud of soldiers. And we've had many incredible moments and conversations where you fill up with tears and just hearing

what some of these guys have had to go through. And it's like sometimes me and Dusty are their their confession and it's crazy because we've had people that haven't been able to talk to their wives or their family or anybody but they're like man you read the song american pride or you did the song past the ammo and like they're they get it off their chest and it's hard to swallow those stories you know because then you're bearing that burden with them but i mean i encourage any soldier that's out there if you ever need an issue you come up to us at a show I'd be happy to talk to you anytime but see seek help look for help there's help everywhere if you if you're battling battle on PTSD or any of those issues because

there are a lot of people that would love to love to reach their hands out and give you a hug you know what I mean I feel like though I feel like we should be helping them so much more I just had combat Barbie on and she's got a phenomenal story but they don't tell you like what happens after you get out of the service and like all the shit that you have to deal with so I think that's really sweet that you guys are open to talking to people because most artists won't do that yeah do you feel like you guys have built your loyal fan base by literally shaking hands and like kissing kissing babies literally or signing asses and slapping titties yeah one thousand yeah because they're super your fan base is crazy loyal they're they're extremely loyal we are very blessed uh to have these these people behind us and like this it's a family and like uh it's crazy to go anywhere

around the country and just see we had a guy last year i'm gonna shout him out yeah stephen hoffman uh he came to every fucking show every single show no matter where it was crazy for the entire every show every single show and he's out of like Denver area. And it came every show. It's unbelievable. Isn't it crazy how people like just love you so much that they just do that? It's hard to grasp, really. It's really hard to grasp like the connection you have with people through music and the people you meet. And it's all walks of life coming together as one.

So it's pretty special. And it's like you hear them, you know, I've asked several different, you know, shiners, I'm like, why? You know, and they're like, because of your music, man. And like, I don't see it that way. And I don't think Dusty sees it that way, but our music is bigger than what we are. You know what I mean? And so it's special to have those have

it be an impact on people's lives when we don't realize you know that it's going it's going to be that big of an impact on people's lives you guys are the great souls that are behind your music though you know so it's the energy that goes into the music being made that reaches people's ears and that's that's i think how we get a lot of our topics and our, you know, stories are stories of our fans now of shiners and their lives. And, you know, the, the shiners that have passed rest in peace to all of them, you know, and, you know, there's their inspirations to, you know, to fill up a page of memories to put out music. So that's beautiful. So have you guys had your aha moment yet? Like, Holy fuck, I've made it. We've made it.

Like, have you guys ever looked at each other and just been like, bro, I can't believe we're here. Yeah. We've had a few of those that we thought were, I mean, I feel like I'm talking a lot more.

I think, I think that March 8th or March 8th, we're out on a cruise ship, plane show of 2020, to hear our peers relax, say, yo, man, our tour just got canceled. They're probably going to be calling you next. We were with the same agency at the time.

I was like, what? What are you talking about? Fuck COVID. What the? be calling you next we were with the same agency at the time and i was like what what are you talking about fuck covid what the you know and then to have lost that entire year of touring you know when me and dusty like that's we're like man we got to be on the road you got to be on the road you got to do it to make it and like pay your bills and that kind of stuff and we've been keep growing 15 straight fucking years of eating asphalt yeah and like when we had we had this this time to where we just stopped it was like what the fuck we do yeah how are we gonna make it you

guys hadn't stopped and then we realize it goes back to that will we didn't have to we don't got a tour ever again we don't got to do this shit no more. I like being home. I want to be home with my wife and my kids and my chickens. You know what I'm saying? I got chickens now. I love that. He loves those fucking chickens and his damn wife, right? I should have brought one with me. I could have flew with it on the plane. I grew up with a chicken named Henrietta

that I was, she was like a dog. She was the coolest thing ever. We actually named one Henrietta too, but it became a rooster and now he's Henry. Oh, shit. That is so is so fucking he's a retarded rooster because he crows and like he crows at like 4 p.m oh but it's better than it's like an internal clock is fucked up but i mean that that to me was my my aha moment i think for dusty too so we had a chance to fucking stop and we still worked we still shot music videos We still got a lot of stuff accomplished. Oh yeah.

But we didn't, we, we realized that that hard life on the road, we don't have to hit it so hard anymore. So now it's like when we're going to be doing these tours, we don't have to be out there, but we want to be out there. You know what I'm saying?

But it's just, that was, I think one of the big moments for us to be like, man, this, this is cool. No, that's an awesome moment moment actually jay and i went through that too we had a family meeting in like april of 2020 and we sat down and we're like okay we can't tour you can't you know you're not gonna be able to do your podcast whatever what are we gonna do and we

were just like fuck it let's turn up on content and we blew up in 2020 because of fucking covid so i mean i just i it's so good to see that you guys went through the same thing and turned a negative into a positive. Yeah. Because a lot of people were just fucking sitting around crying, just like upset about it. This is what's crazy is we had a partnership with Geiber Grills. And they do –

We stocked up on like sponsorships is what we did too. And we did stuff with Slip Shine and those cats. And like we had stuff that came shine and those cats and like we had stuff that came through and worked with different companies for periods of time a guy bird was nine months you know and it's yeah we did cooking videos and yeah all that stuff but i mean it was fun it was fucking fun i love that i mean they gave us these badass grills and broilers and bird you're an influencer at heart i swear to god God. He's an influencer. I need to get on YouTube and stuff. You do.

I'm not one. Sorry. Have you guys ever thought about it? Sorry, guys. I'm not on social media. I just can't stand it. Yeah. It's just one of those things.

And I know there's people that, you know. It's a different machine. It's a different way to live and stuff. But I've been so plugged into my career that when i had that chance to unplug i unplugged yeah no for sure have you guys ever thought about having your own podcast people would fucking trip out for you guys kind of ran that idea around but i don't know it's hard to do it when you know you guys could do it on the road while you're on the tour bus you could but he's like no i guess it all depends on how hard you hit it the night before

oh that would be even better day shot and you're just like looking for lunch and you gotta i mean you go for runs now so i mean this guy's out jogging i don't know when it is are you the one who texted me this morning i was cracking up i was like oh my god sweating so profusely oh you poor baby yeah well i made it what is 2022 gonna hold for moonshine bandits what do we have to look forward to well we jump in the studio february uh in atlanta so we'll be there for a couple weeks recording new album we're writing right now tour starts in april what else we got we We got shows all the way till December right now. And they're still coming in, which is great. Our whole year's probably booked up already, pretty much.

Is there going to be another Jelly and Moonshine Bandit collab somewhere along the line? I hope so. Fuck. We hope so. Jelly, I'm trying to retire. We need a hook pack. He'll give it to you.

We need a Save Me song over here. Sheesh. You know, I want to dabble in the jelly roll. Let's get a good jelly roll. Let's get a little jelly story. I'll FaceTime him after this. Hey, Bubba. Hey, Bubba.

I got to tell you this. So when Jelly was going out on the road with us, he opened for us for one of the tours. I can't remember which one it was. What about that? When I heard that he was going to be on the tour, I was like, man, I don't know about that. He's a rapper. How's he going to fit with us? I didn't know.

Yeah. And Dusty let me hear the Marshall Tucker song. And I was like, where did that guy come from with this? This is nuts. His voice, he's got a beautiful voice. And I heard a couple more things, but that wasn't it. I met him and within five minutes of talking with him, I fell in love with that guy. Just an angel baby. And I'm telling you that for everybody out there, Jelly Roll has got

one of the biggest hearts. He really does. He is one of the nicest guys you've ever met, but he'll still whoop your ass. Just letting you know that. I always say that he's a teddy bear with teeth. So when we had our bus in at the time, and like Jelly was rolling around in his van. Oh, fucking Bertha. Bertha.

And fucking smoke billowing out the window. Yeah, fucking smoke coming out the window. The dirtiest fucking van you've ever seen in your life. Yeah. I don't know. We had one dirty. Oh, my God. We had an A-team van. Fucking pissed on the feet.

Anyway, so every time we got to a venue, we would be there early. And then Jelly would come in around load-in time or whatever. And he would come in on the bus. And normally, it would just be me in there on the bus. And I'd be in my bunk. I was always sleeping in my bunk, napping during the middle of the day. Jelly come in, and he sat there, and I opened my curtain and waved at him, and he grinned and waved back, and he lighted up a joint.

And then about midway through the tour, he was lighting up different shit of joints. And then by the end of the tour, I was hearing this clanking sound, like fucking, what the hell is that i look out there and he's got these glass fucking wands and dabbed and shit he looked like a fucking wizard on the thing dude and i was i was fascinated by it because he was concentrating so hard to fucking get that thing just right dude lit it up i it up. And I was like, man, dude, it was a fun. Next level. We had a blast.

It was a fun dude, man. I'm so glad the dab fucking season is over. He's no longer a dabber, thank God, because it was fucking brutal. Yeah. It seemed like dab would take you down. Like, people get stuck. I see chopsticks would get on that dude, and you can't even fucking talk for two hours. Why do you want to be that high?

Who wants to be that fucking high? I don't know oh no i mean do you guys still party do you guys do drugs or anything i give it up i smoke a little weed when after the show i'll do that drink a little wine then go to bed but i'm just i'm just a whiskey wine and you guys are just like the most chill dudes like it's crazy because you guys watch your videos and you guys are like these fucking sex icons with all these bitches around you and just partying. And then after. It's all entertainment. It's good. No, I get it.

I get it. Trust me. The bunny that you see online is not the bunny that you see in person. So I totally understand. I can maintain that image, you know, when you're taking out the trash. That could be hot though. You guys could uh you guys could do a moonshine bandits only fans my wife knows how to bring me back to reality real quick

you know what i mean wife's like no i'm not fucking around with you boy yeah now it's cool it's definitely cool no i love it well i just want to thank you guys so much for coming on the podcast why don't you shout out where everybody can find you like your youtubes your social medias just whatever you want. Right. All these bitches are going to be sliding in your DMs after this, so why ifs I apologize. Just check out moonshinebandits.com.

Is that it? Yeah. It was nice how you went into the mic to say it. I did that a couple times. But, yeah, moonshinebandits.com. Come see the show. If you've never seen the show show it's a way to escape you're going to have

a lot of fun we encourage a lot of crowd participation so a lot of chicks get on stage and dance and have a good time no dudes

you didn't even tell your baloney 5000 nah that's your story that's your story what is it what is it let me hear

what is it you got some story I want to hear back in the day when we were first starting off, after the show, we'd line up girls in our hotel room, and everybody would have packs of bologna, throw them at their ass.

Oh, well. Whoever's bologna stuck the longest would win. Yeah. Should we do that? Okay, so when you guys leave here, I'm having my first annual Whorelympics. Okay. First then.

Do we have to wear a tux? So listen. Yeah, please. That's her answer. So five beautiful females. I was going to say five bitches, but five beautiful females will be coming here today. And what they're gonna do is it's pretty much like my own personal beauty pageant but like with my own spin on it fuck

you probably need some judges yeah well we do and i mean if you guys what do you think mimi you think we'll have enough microphones i don't know we'll figure it out hey we don't even have to be on a microphone so these girls the first challenge that they have is called, um, holy smokes and they have to take this kielbasa and they have a choice between their three holes. Who can take it the deepest and which hole can happen on this table? Yes. And the next one is, um, glory holes. And what it is is we have a pack of hot dogs that are like 16 hot dogs. And they have to put their hands behind their backs and get on their knees. And we're throwing it at their face.

And it's going to be filmed in slow motion. And whoever can catch the most hot dogs in their mouth wins that challenge. I don't know why, but this is reminding me of Mike Busey. Shut up, Mike. We love Mike. What's up, Mike? Mike's coming on the podcast, too. He'll be good.

Oh, I love Mike. We partied at his house once. Yeah, man. No, I love Mike, too. That reminds me of Sturges. That reminds me of the hot dog thing on the road. And then the last one, they have to suck peanut butter off of an eggplant in under a minute. And whoever sucks the most peanut butter off wins.

Cancel dinner plans. The grand prize though is the real catch. They get a $40 gift certificate to Chick-fil-A and a microwave. Oh yeah, microwave. That's a good gift. That's the gift to keep warm in your food up, Clark. Not even an air fryer, just a microwave.

So yeah, that's what's going down after we get done with this podcast. Thank you guys so much for coming on. I think you guys are sweethearts. Shout out to Jelly. Love you guys. Thank you for having us. We appreciate it. Love you guys. Thank you guys for tuning in to another episode

of Dumb Blonde. I will see you guys next week. Bye.